#I have never written a smut scene this long it was a struggle lol

[five-and-dimes]

Every Hand to Hold

For the Dreaming Bingo prompt: Threesome

Rating: Explicit

Ship: Dream/Hob/Calliope

Warnings: None

Additional Tags: Immortal Throuple, hurt/comfort, miscommunications, Dream's terrible horrible no good self esteem, happy ending

Summary: Inspired by this post from @cuubism (specifically her tags) that my brain then fully ran away with. Dream thinks it's wild that two separate gorgeous brunettes decided to start hooking up with him, but he's not complaining, even if he does get a little more heartbroken than he should when they both stop seeing him within a week of each other.

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It started with Calliope.

Dream had been wandering aimlessly in a small, secondhand bookstore when he had turned the corner and crashed into a woman with her arms so full of books she could barely see over them. Mortified, Dream had apologized and immediately began gathering up the books she had dropped, all of them either poetry collections or textbooks on the history of poetry. He had shyly inquired about her selections, and she had happily spoken at length about all of them, Dream immediately enamored with her passion and intelligence. She said her name was Calliope, and then she had dragged Dream into a small storage closet and pushed him to his knees. 

And then a week later, he had met Hob. Dream had been sitting in the park, quietly feeding the birds, when a handsome man had sauntered over and asked if the seat next to him was taken. His boldness was startling, the way he sprawled next to Dream and kept an easy conversation going even as Dream fumbled. He had a warmth about him, a bright laugh that never felt like it was directed at Dream, and it had been a shock when, despite the long list of things Dream knew he had gotten wrong during their interaction, Hob had leaned forward and grinned.

“So. Your place or mine?”

Dream lived closer.

It all seemed to happen so fast. Dream was no stranger to the occasional one night stand, something quick and simple to ease his loneliness for even a moment, but never had he been propositioned by two beautiful people in such quick succession. And he’d certainly never had people want to see him again. He had been so flattered when Calliope had asked for his number, and even more so when she actually used it, asking if they could meet again, preferably in an actual bed this time. Hob had left his own number on Dream’s nightstand, and Dream had felt foolishly optimistic when he texted him to let him know Dream’s number as well, but he was glad he did when Hob texted back a few days later, wanting to fool around again. While he had long given up on the hope of ever being relationship material, he thought he could handle some simple hookups.

Apparently he was wrong. 

Dream never had the courage to text either of them first, but at least once a week one of them invited themselves over and Dream would clear his schedule. They were both confident and clear about what they wanted, and Dream felt such relief at how easy they made it for him. He didn’t have to guess and worry about getting it wrong- all he had to do was go where their hands guided him. It was simple. He would bend over backwards to make them happy, give them anything and everything they could possibly want from him, because even if they never stayed long, it was enough that they kept coming back. He just wanted them to keep coming back.

After almost two months, Dream had been typing and retyping a message to Hob, trying to ask if maybe sometime they could grab a drink before going to bed together. Even if Dream wasn’t cut out for a romantic relationship, maybe he could at least convince Hob to a friends-with-benefits situation? He thought maybe he could be good enough to be called a friend. And Hob was so kind to him.

Before he has a chance to hit send though, Hob texts him first. 

Hey, I’m sorry, but I don’t think we should meet up anymore. Thanks for all the fun times though!

Dream feels his heart sink.

Is everything alright?

What happened?

What did I do wrong?

Tell me what you want and I’ll give it to you 

Please

Please

I don’t want to be alone anymore

He types, and deletes, and types, and deletes, and ignores the way his vision blurs.

Okay

He puts his phone on silent, but it doesn’t matter. Hob never responds.

A few days later, he decides that he must be brave quicker this time. So he steels himself, and texts Calliope to ask if she would like to join him at a poetry reading the local library was putting on. 

As friends, he is quick to add on. He would not dare to reach for more than that. He does not think he is being unreasonable though. Calliope likes poetry, is a writer herself, and at a reading she will not even have to worry about dealing with Dream’s stilted attempts at conversation. They can simply sit silently together, and enjoy other people’s words, and she can put his mouth to better uses afterwards. It’s perfect.

I don’t think that’s a good idea

Dream wants to cry. He is mid apology, typing rapidly about how he did not mean to overstep, they could just keep their current arrangement, it’s fine, really. But another message comes through before he has a chance to send it.

I don’t think we should see each other at all anymore

He stares at the message for what feels like ages, his own rambling words still sitting uselessly in the text box. Finally, he deletes his reply slowly, typing a new response.

I understand.

He doesn’t though. He really, really, doesn’t.

It’s not like Dream isn’t used to being dumped- most people grew sick of him and his flaws eventually. But he had thought he was at least a good enough lay for them to stick around for a little longer. He had tried so hard not to let too much of his undesirable qualities show during their nights together, and they had always seemed more than satisfied with his performance in bed. So where did he go wrong?

Maybe they could just… tell. Maybe they could sense each time he touched them that he was putting too much of his heart into it, that he was too attached, too desperate, too hungry for more.

He recalls the way his sibling had laughed at him when he had stated that he had given up on dating.

“Please,” they had drawled, “You’ll always be going after someone. You bleed neediness. Sometimes I think you’ll stain my couch with it.”

Maybe they were right. Maybe Calliope and Hob had grown tired of having to wash off his desperation after each encounter. After all, it was just supposed to be casual sex, and here he was, nursing a heart broken twice over, proving them all right. He had no one to blame but himself.

It wasn’t a breakup. He hadn’t been together with either of them, not in any way that truly mattered. He couldn’t tell his sister, or one of his few friends, why he was even more morose than usual. What was he supposed to say? How was he supposed to explain that he kept checking his phone, didn’t want to make plans or go out just in case one of them changed their mind and contacted him, wanted to be available just in case either of them decided they weren’t done with him yet? 

He allowed himself a few weeks to wallow, to mourn, and then, as much as a petulant part of him didn’t want to, Dream knew he had to move on. So when he receives an email informing him of an event at a local bar, he makes plans to attend. Galleria was a favorite of Dream’s, as they displayed pieces from local artists throughout their establishment. It was one of the first places to showcase Dream’s own art, and he has been a regular in their rotation for years now. As such, despite generally avoiding crowds, Dream always made an effort to support the shows of all the artists they featured. 

So he would go. He would absorb himself in new artwork, have a few drinks, maybe throw himself into a one night stand that he would make sure actually remained a one night stand. He would distract himself. There wasn’t much else he could do.

It works, at first. The crowd is not overwhelming, but still a good turn out for the young artist greeting people by the door. Dream accepts a postcard with her information and then splurges on a nicer glass of wine to sip on as he meanders through the bar, weaving through tables to take in the newly hung paintings. He waves awkwardly at the managers who luckily know him well enough to simply wave back instead of starting a conversation, and Dream finds himself actually feeling alright for the first time in weeks.

And then he sees Hob and Calliope.

Together.

Not only together, but together. Holding hands and clearly a couple, each with a drink in their free hands as they chatted with another patron, their shoulders brushing as they leaned together to make room for the people moving around them. Dream can see their lips moving, one after the other, probably finishing each others’ sentences with the ease of two people who belonged together.

Dream feels like the scum of the earth. For all the love in his heart, he never wanted to ruin anyone else’s. He never wanted to be a home-wrecker. 

He is so frozen in horror that he could barely move, the reality of the situation washing over him like ice water, so when Hob and Calliope finally turn and see him, he is still staring, wide-eyed. They stare back, and then look at each other, and Dream sees their mouths moving rapidly, everything coming to light no doubt, and Dream finally manages to get his body to move, to run. He put his glass on the first flat surface he sees and takes off, desperate to escape. But of course, he can’t even do that right, and he soon realizes that in his panic he has run in the opposite direction of the exit, instead standing pressed against the back wall. Trapped. It feels too risky to turn back, and so instead he flings himself into the thankfully single-person restroom, locking the door before leaning heavily against it. 

Everything feels ruined, so much worse than it had felt even just a few hours ago. It had been bad enough losing both of them, feeling thrown away and heartbroken yet again. Now, even the memories are tainted. Seeing Hob and Calliope together had opened his eyes in the worst way. They had looked so right together, both of them so beautiful and shining and bright, glowing smiles and cheerful laughs. Of course Dream wasn’t good enough for either of them. He only hopes that he hasn’t inadvertently destroyed their relationship.

Dream presses his fists against his eyes, fighting back tears. He feels caught between sorrow and rage and shame. They hadn’t told him. He never would have taken either of them up on their offers if they had told him.

A swift series of knocks on the door makes him jump, and he quickly chokes out, “Occupied!” He just needs a little longer to pull himself together.

Unfortunately, a familiar voice calls back, “Dream?”

Hob’s voice is calm, no immediate rage or hatred, but it doesn’t make Dream’s heart pound any less. Especially when another voice joins him.

“Can we talk to you?” Calliope asks gently, “Please?”

She doesn’t sound angry either, but Dream can’t bring himself to trust it. Still. He knows he must face them. Whatever happens, he has been cornered and there is nowhere to go but forward.

His hands shake as he flips the lock, opening the door with resignation. In front of him, the two people he had grown so attached to- the two people who had, within a week of each other, cut him out of their lives- were smiling at him. Hob had an arm around Calliope’s shoulder, and they were both dressed nicely for the event. They were somehow even more beautiful standing together.

Hob grinned, “Fancy meeting you here, stranger,” he said teasingly.

Something about the ease in their posture, their casual smiles, Hob’s joking greeting, ignites a  flicker of fury in him.

“Neither of you told me,” he snaps. They both blink, surprised by the outburst, and he struggles to continue, to get it all out before he either loses his nerve or starts crying, “Neither of you said you had a partner. So if- if you’re upset-… do not be upset with me, because I didn’t know.” He wishes he sounded more angry, but he can’t fully conceal his desperation, or the way his hands shake at his sides, “It’s not my fault.”

Please believe me, he doesn’t say, please forgive me.

Hob raised his hands, “Hey, no, Dream, everything is fine,” he smiled sympathetically, “Nobody did anything wrong, I promise. Calliope and I are in an open relationship. It’s all okay.”

Dream blinked in surprise, feeling the adrenaline slowly bleed out of him, “Oh.”

“We did not mean to keep it a secret,” Calliope chimed in, winding an arm around Hob’s waist and looking at him fondly, “we both have a tendency to get caught up in our… excursions. Sometimes we forget that details might be appreciated.”

Looking between the two of them, Dream thinks he finally gets it. Perhaps they had been attracted to the novelty of him at first. His sickly pale skin versus their golden tans. His sharp bonyness when they are both full and soft. But of course that novelty could only last so long, especially if each time they left him they were going home to each other. He never had a chance of comparing.

“I… am glad,” he responds slowly, awkwardly, “When I saw you both… I had been worried…”

“Understandable,” Hob replies, “And we really are sorry. Didn’t mean to give you the wrong impression.”

Dream shifts uncomfortably, “I apologize. For snapping at you.”

“There is no need,” Calliope reassures, waving the apology away, “We caught you off guard, and we should have told you about our situation from the beginning.”

“But, now that we’re all on the same page…” Hob drawls, rocking on his heels as he glances between Dream and Calliope, “I know I- or, both of us, apparently- texted you to call our whole arrangement off, but…”

He trails off, giving Dream a pointed look that Dream doesn’t understand at all. His mouth opens, but he has no idea what Hob is talking about, what he’s supposed to say. 

Placing a hand on Hob’s arm, Calliope continues, “But now, the arrangement has changed,” she explains, looking at Dream intently, “Now we know that we both desire you, and our interests are aligned in a way we had not realized before. And so we were wondering if you might be willing to give us another chance. So that we might be with you… together.”

For a long moment, all Dream can do is stare. 

“...Together?”

His voice cracks on the word, and Hob and Calliope nod eagerly, looking at him hopefully, and Dream feels lightheaded. He had been resigned to Hob and Calliope not being a part of his life anymore, and after weeks of wishing he could have at least had more time to prepare, now he was being given it. One more night, at the very least.

Surely that’s better than nothing.

“Okay.”

The word is barely out of his mouth when Hob nearly leaps forward to kiss him. Dream thinks he might have fallen to the ground if not for Hob’s hands gripping his hips as he kisses him deeply. It is hungry, biting, impatient. Hob must have been really aching for a threesome if he was this eager already, Dream thinks. When Calliope tugs Hob away to claim Dream’s mouth with her own, he wonders if she had been wanting this for a while, too. 

“We don’t live far from here,” Calliope says, breathless, “Just a few blocks. If you’d like to come to ours this time.”

Dream nods obediently, still trying to catch his breath as Calliope takes his hand and Hob wraps an arm around his waist. They guide him out of the bar swiftly and efficiently, letting out little huffs of laughter as they speed down the sidewalk. Hob’s hand drifts down to squeeze his arse and Dream feels inexplicably nauseous. 

They really do live quite close, and far too soon Dream is being led up a short flight of stairs, Calliope and Hob giggling at each other playfully as they disentangle just enough to tumble through the door of their apartment. Dream closes the door behind him mechanically, and when he looks, Hob and Calliope are kissing. It is heated, and passionate, and they move together with the practiced ease of two people who have loved each other for a long time. He thinks again of how right they look together. And it suddenly occurs to him how wrong he must look next to them. 

And he should be grateful. He knows he should be grateful. He had thought that he had lost them forever, and yet here they were, inviting him into their home for a night of pleasure, a chance to be useful to both of them. He should be honored that out of everyone, out of all the people so much better than him, they chose Dream to be the toy they brought into bed to spice up their relationship. 

“I can’t.”

His voice cracks on the words, choked out before he can think better of it. Hob and Calliope part, turning to look at him in confusion. Part of him wishes he hadn’t said anything at all, almost wants to take it back, but he can’t. He had done this before, had tried so hard to be what they wanted. But he couldn’t do this and not get his heart broken again. 

“I’m sorry, I…. I thought I could…. I can’t do this, I’m sorry.”

His whole body is shaking, and he’s breathless, eyes downcast because he can’t bring himself to face whatever disgust is surely on their faces. His hand fumbles for the doorknob, ready to flee into the night, but soft fingers on his wrist still him. Glancing up through his eyelashes, he finds Hob standing before him, eyes shining with concern.

“Hey, hey… “ he soothes, running his hand up and down Dream’s arm, “It’s alright, dove, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want. But I’m a little uncomfortable letting you run off when you’re clearly so upset.”

Calliope steps forward, taking Dream’s other hand, “Will you talk to us, starlight?”

The pet names make it harder. If he closes his eyes he thinks he could pretend that they actually want him. And that’s exactly why he can’t do this.

“I…like you,” he admits, looking away in shame, “Both of you. And I know I should be happy that you find me good enough to, to even just have sex with you, but… I’m greedy.” All his previous partners had come to hate him for it. For always wanting and wanting and wanting. He was too romantic, too much, too high maintenance, yet somehow also too cold, too awkward, too distant. The best he can hope for now is to leave before they come to truly resent him. “I want… more. More than just sex, and. And I do not think I can do this and just walk away when it’s over.” He doesn’t want to hear them tell him to leave. 

He lowers his voice to a whisper, “It is better that I just. Go now.”

There is a long pause, and he waits for them to let him go, perhaps call him stupid or express their annoyance at having brought him all the way here only for him to not deliver. Perhaps they will just shove him out the door and be done with it.

“Oh, Dream…” Hob’s voice is soft, and sorrowful, and he brings Dream’s hand up to clutch it between both of his own. When he glances up, Hob looks… shattered.

“We’re so, so sorry,” Calliope whispers, bringing a hand to rest on Dream’s cheek, “We should have been clearer,” she tugs Dream down to press a gentle kiss to his forehead so he can feel her words against his skin, “We like you too.”

Dream feels his breath catch in his chest. His eyes are wide with disbelief, but as Calliope leans back, Hob nods in agreement, “Apparently we were both being fools,” he smiles self-deprecatingly,“We have an open relationship, yeah, but the reason I called things off with you was because… I was catching feelings,” he admits softly. Then he laughs bashfully, “And I was too chicken to just talk to Calliope about it.”

Calliope shook her head, smiling sadly, “We truly are a pair, because that is the exact reason I put a stop to our trysts as well.”

“So when we saw you, and we realized we’d both been going after the same person, it all came out,” Hob continued. Dream can barely breathe, his mind racing as he thinks back to how Calliope and Hob had looked at Dream, and then each other, how they had leaned in to talk and gesture with each other. “When we said we wanted to be together with you, we meant together. We want you as our partner. We just… didn’t know we could have you like that. Until tonight.”

They want him.

They want him.

Dream opens his mouth to say something- are you sure, thank you, you won’t regret it, I’ll be good, I promise I’ll be good- but all that comes out is a sob.

“Oh, oh our poor darling,” Calliope cooed, and then her arms are around him, pulling him close and guiding him to lay his head on her shoulder. She pets the hairs at the nape of his neck, her voice heavy with sadness as she whispers against his ear, “You came here with us, and the whole time you thought we were bringing you here to use you?”

Dream wants to rid her voice of the note of guilt he can hear. They did nothing wrong, nothing at all. But before he can get any words out to shift the blame onto himself where it belongs, Hob runs his hands up his back, massaging lightly as he leans in to speak into Dream’s other ear.

“You are far too important for that,” Dream feels his breath hitch, and Hob nuzzles against his neck, “We didn’t bring you here just to fuck you. We want to love you. Will you let us?”

It is everything Dream has ever wanted, and it hardly feels real. He shakes and shivers as he’s held between the two of them, surrounded by their warmth and the soothing sound of their voices as they comfort him.

Eventually, his breath evens, and he is able to pull away slightly, dropping his gaze to the floor. He can feel his face heat with embarrassment. He was making a scene, all because he had misunderstood what was being asked of him, and now as a result he wasn’t giving them anything.

He takes a few shuddering breaths, trying to formulate an apology, something that will convince them that they aren’t making a huge mistake. But before he gets a chance, Hob wraps his arms around his waist from behind.

“Correct me if I’m wrong,” Hob drawls, his lips pressed to Dream’s neck but his words directed at Calliope, “but when Dream and I had sex, he was always so generous. Only wanted to focus on me and my pleasure, never his own. Got all shy when I tried to return the favor. I get the feeling it might have been similar with you?”

Dream feels himself flush as Calliope hums, running her hands up Dream’s chest languidly, “Hm, yes. So attentive, so eager to please, to do whatever I wanted. Never so much as mentioned his own wants.” Her tone is nearly scolding, and Dream feels lost and frozen.

Then he feels Hob grin, “Well then…” he bites at Dream’s ear, while the tips of his fingers dip beneath the waistband of his jeans, drawing a gasp from Dream’s lips, “sounds like it’s your turn now, Love.”

Calliope tugs at his shirt, stepping backwards as she guides all of them further into the apartment, “Will you let us take care of you? Show you how much we want you?”

Following helplessly, Dream blushes and stutters, so far removed from their confidence and surety. He wonders if this is a joke. They cannot truly want a foolish mess like him.

“Whatever you want,” he croaks, “You can do whatever you want.”

They enter the bedroom, and Hob flicks on some dim lights as Calliope takes Dream’s chin in her hand. She looks sad. 

“That,” she states softly, “is not the answer we’re looking for.”

Dream fears he might burst into tears again at her soft chastisement, but luckily Hob steps in, lightly removing Calliope’s hand as he peppers Dream’s face with kisses.

“It’s alright, Love,” he smiles against Dream’s cheek, “we’ll work on it.” There’s a promise in his voice that makes Dream shiver. “For now, just know that what we want,” he cups Dream’s face in one hand to speak against his lips, “is to give you everything you want.”

Swallowing thickly, Dream bites back words about how he doesn’t know what he wants. He just wants them to stay. He wants to be good enough, he wants to be worthwhile enough. He wants them to stay. 

But he is distracted from his thoughts when Calliope steals him away from Hob for a kiss of her own. She tilts her head back, offering her mouth for Dream’s tongue to explore shyly as she dips her hands beneath his shirt. Hob walks around her, standing at her back and brushing her hair over her shoulder as he unzips her dress. She moans against Dream’s mouth, biting down gently on his lower lip as Hob kisses between her shoulder blades. The dress falls easily to the floor, allowing her to step out of it gracefully, and even after all the numerous times they have slept together, Dream still finds himself staring in awe at her. Her bra and panties are a muted lavender colored lace, contrasting against her golden skin beautifully. In the dim room he can just make out the soft, dark hairs along her arms and legs, and he cannot resist reaching out to run his fingers along the edge of her panties, where he knows just below is hiding a thatch of dark curls.

Reaching out, Calliope covers Dream’s hands with her own, pressing them more firmly into the soft flesh of her hips. Behind her, Hob unclasps her bra, tossing it to the side as she steps out of her underwear. Once she is naked, she turns to Hob, smiling gently as she unbuttons his shirt.

Dream watches, enamored as Calliope kisses along Hob’s jaw as she unbuckles his belt, Hob nearly ripping his clothes off as soon as every button is undone. They are beautiful together, Calliope leaning up to press her breasts against Hob’s hair covered body as they kiss. He wants to paint them, to try to capture the way their beauty only enhances each other. 

Then, they turn to look at him, and Dream feels frozen under the combined weight of their piercing gazes. A part of him wishes he could turn the lights completely off, could hide in the darkness to try to make his lacking less obvious, and he moves his arms jerkily to hug his middle.

And yet, as Calliope and Hob descend on him, their eyes are full of appreciation. 

“We haven’t forgotten you, gorgeous,” Hob grins, leaning in to kiss at Dream’s neck as he slides his hands under his shirt. Dream gasps as his fingers ghost over his nipples. Calliope runs her hands along his arms, guiding him to raise them as Hob pulls his shirt over his head. They are so warm, and when he closes his eyes, he forgets for a moment how ridiculous he must look between them, getting lost in the sensation of hands running over his skin reverently. Before, they were always in a hurry. Either coming to Dream before work or an appointment, or at the end of the day before returning home. It was not uncommon for only the minimal amount of undressing necessary to happen, and certainly it was never a drawn out affair. 

Neither of them had ever undressed him themselves, never unzipped his jeans like they were unwrapping a present, never smoothed their hands over his exposed skin like he was something to savor. 

“Breathe, darling.”

Dream startles at Hob’s gentle reminder, gasping sharply because he had, in fact, been holding his breath. Hob smiles encouragingly, dragging his hands over Dream’s ribs to feel the way they expand with each breath, pulling him close and nuzzling behind his ear and inhaling happily. Hesitantly, Dream wraps his arms around Hob, letting his fingers trace the strong muscles of his back. His grip tightens when he feels Calliope press a kiss to the base of his spine as she slides his jeans and underwear down his legs, gripping his shins as she helps him to step out of them. 

Even biting his lip cannot fully stifle the gasp as she stands, the soft swell of her breasts pressing into his back at the same time as he becomes aware of the heat of Hob’s cock sliding against his hip. His own erection is a distant thought, and it feels insignificant in comparison to the scratch of Calliope’s pubic hair against his arse, and the way Hob pulls him in for another kiss. 

A soft whine escapes him as Calliope steps away, feeling cold without her warmth to blanket him. Hob hushes him gently, moving them both to follow after her, and when Dream turns to look, he sees Calliope moving onto the bed. She leans against the headboard, legs spread wide, and holds a hand out, beckoning Dream to her. Dream feels a brief sense of relief at the familiarity, moving to crawl between her legs, ready and eager to bring her pleasure. To earn his keep.

But before he can reach her, there is a hand on his arm, twisting him around until he is facing Hob. He grins, and pulls Dream into a heated kiss, his tongue exploring his mouth when Dream gasps. As he deepens the kiss, he presses forward, crowding against Dream until he begins to crawl backwards. Hob continues to guide him back, barely giving him a chance to breathe, and before he knows it his back is pressing against Calliope’s chest. She wastes no time gripping Dream’s waist, tugging him even closer as she mouths at his neck. Her legs bracket his hips, and her tongue is tracing the shell of his ear, and Hob still hasn’t let up his kissing, and Dream feels dizzy on their attention.

When Hob finally leans back, Dream is panting, and Hob has a look of pride at how worked up he’s gotten him. Dream feels overwhelmed, and they’ve barely even done anything. 

Hob sits back on his heels, resting his hands on Dream’s ankles and smiling softly, “Will you open up for me, sweetheart?”

Dream didn’t even realize, but his knees were pressed together so hard it was nearly painful. Yet even with the realization he could not bring himself to spread his legs. This felt backwards. No matter what they said, it felt wrong not to be focusing on them. They were already giving him so much.

“You do not need to…” he choked out, pressing his legs together even harder and drawing them towards his chest, so afraid of asking for too much despite not having asked at all. “I… I do not mind- truly, I don’t, I-”

His words are cut off by the feeling of hands running up his thighs, Calliope’s chest pressing against his back as she gently brushed from hip to knee. At the same time, in unison, like the practiced couple they are, Hob drags his hands up Dream’s shins. They meet in the middle, Hob and Calliope lacing their fingers over Dream’s knees. And together, they gently pry his legs apart, until he is left open and exposed in front of them. 

“There you are,” Calliope breathes in his ear, her hands slipping back down to stroke at his hip bones. Hob takes advantage of the distraction to slip his torso between Dream’s legs, peppering soft kisses up his leg. Dream shivers at the touch, Hob hooking one leg over his shoulder to stroke his flank as he kisses the inside of his knee.

“I couldn’t help but notice,” Calliope purrs, running a hand through Hob’s hair to get his attention as she smirks down at him, “he always made the prettiest noises when I scratched at his inner thighs.”

Hob looks up, grinning mischievously, and before Dream has a chance to brace himself, he grazes his teeth across his skin and then bites, putting just enough force to leave the slightest indent of teeth. Dream slaps a hand over his mouth as he keens, his toes curling, and when Hob grins he can feel his teeth.

“So sensitive,” he says, clearly delighted, “but I didn’t quite hear you love.”

As he moves to Dream’s other thigh, Calliope takes Dream’s wrist and pulls his hand away from his mouth. She holds both his hands as she wraps her arms around his chest until his arms are crossed. With her gentle restraint, he cannot muffle his sounds as Hob drags his teeth all the way to where his thigh creases. 

It is overwhelming, so much sensation all at once. Hob sucks and bites at his thighs, leaving a trail of little love bites behind, and Calliope loosens her hold as she begins to stroke at his nipples, an embarrassing squeak escaping him as she pinches just as Hob bites down. Trembling, Dream can’t help but shrink into himself as much as he can. Head bowed, Calliope’s arms preventing him from curling over as her clever fingers play with his chest, Hob’s body preventing his legs from snapping shut at each graze of teeth. It is so good. It is also so much, and when he feels Calliope raise a hand to his hair he flinches, bracing himself without meaning to. 

Hob’s eyes dart up to look at him, and Dream does his best to exhale, to relax, to act normal for once. Pulling back just slightly, Hob rests his head against Dream’s leg, one hand petting his thigh softly. His other hand reaches out to tap Calliope’s knee, drawing her attention as he hums thoughtfully.

“He’d never admit it, but he doesn’t like having his hair pulled.”

Dream feels himself flush, eyes wide with embarrassment and looking at Hob with shock. He has no idea how Hob figured that out, he thought he hid it pretty well, and he feels a stab of betrayal at being called out. He feels Calliope suck in a breath behind him, and just knows she’s thinking of all the times she had gripped his hair harshly, twisting and tugging as Dream pleasured her, his discomfort hidden between her legs. 

It was worth it, though. He would do anything for them.

Hob looks at him a little sadly, and Dream wonders how much of his thoughts are written plainly across his face. His eyes move to Calliope, smiling at her as he continues, “But if you just scratch his scalp lightly? He’ll melt under your hands.”

Calliope moves before Dream has a chance to respond, and he can’t hold back a shuddering sigh as he feels her manicured nails run through his hair, just barely grazing his skin. She does it again, and again, and Dream’s eyes close in bliss.

Tears sting at the corner of his eyes, and he swallows thickly as he forces himself to speak, “You… you can pull. If you want to.”

Calliope hums, but makes no move to stop her gentle petting, “I don’t want to, actually, thank you.”

He’s doing this all wrong, but the tears escape despite his best efforts. He feels his chest hitch and he waits for Hob and Calliope’s frustration, their impatience, their jeering mockery. It never comes. Everything seems to slow down for a moment, both of them just petting him, holding him, quietly giving him the chance to catch his breath. 

Almost without noticing, he finds himself relaxing. Just as Hob predicted, Dream slowly melts back against Calliope as she continues stroking his hair, sinking against her chest as the rigid tension he had been holding himself with slowly bleeds out of him. His legs fall open a little wider, no longer pressed against Hob’s shoulders with locked muscles. The tears slow, his breath evens, and his eyes drift shut. Calliope presses a kiss to his damp cheek, and Hob nuzzles against his hip bone, and it feels good without feeling like he’s going to drown in it.

“There’s a love,” Hob whispers against his skin, “We’ve got you. No need to rush. We’re more than happy to take our time with you.”

Leaning up, Hob trails kisses up Dream’s stomach and chest, until he finally reaches his mouth and presses against him deeply. Dream sighs against his mouth, letting his head drop back onto Calliope’s shoulder as she claims Hob’s lips next. The overwhelming fire has calmed to a simmering warmth, and when Calliope turns her head to kiss him, Hob’s movement makes him gasp as their cocks briefly brush against each other. He hears Hob whine softly as well. 

He is panting again when Calliope moves to suck at his neck, and he feels Hob grin as he places wet, open mouthed kisses across his stomach, chin just barely brushing against his straining cock. With the tension eased out of him, he finds himself unable to hold back the soft, desperate moan as Hob’s hands glide up his inner thighs.

Calliope reaches her hand around and, with practiced ease, grips a fistful of Hob’s hair in her hand, dragging his face firmly against Dream’s groin.

“I think we’ve teased him enough, my love.”

Dream sucks in a breath as he feels Hob’s moan against his skin. It occurs to him now, as he takes in the pleasure on Hob’s face as he’s manhandled, that Calliope probably treated Dream the same way simply out of habit. Her hands moved with confidence and familiarity, Hob’s eyes fluttering with arousal. He feels a sharp stab of guilt for daring to have different preferences than them, for not hiding it well enough, for disrupting their routine.

But whatever half-formed apology was on his lips dies when Hob parts his lips and Calliope guides him to take Dream’s cock. He has to bite his lip to muffle his cries, and his body trembles with effort to not thrust up into the warm, wet cavern of Hob’s mouth. 

“I’m surprised he managed to hold himself back so long,” Calliope whispers against Dream’s ear, stroking Hob’s cheek reverently, her fingers tracing his lips where they’re stretched around Dream’s length, “A large part of why we opened our relationship was because he loves sucking cock so much. My strap-on just couldn’t quite satisfy him.” 

Dream shudders at the words, whining when Hob hums, glancing up with bright eyes, looking like he would be laughing in agreement if his mouth wasn’t full. Calliope tugs at his hair, and Dream keens at the feeling of Hob’s tongue dragging across his prick as Calliope pulls him off. 

Hob grins, licking his lips, “Didn’t want to scare you off,” he admits to Dream, “Didn’t want to push when I wasn’t sure why you wouldn’t let me reciprocate.” His hands move to Dream’s arse, squeezing gently before tugging him forward, sliding him down the bed just slightly until his head is pillowed against Calliope’s breasts and Hob can bury his nose in the crease of Dream’s thigh. 

“Nothing to be afraid of now, darling,” Hob says, smiling, “So let go for us.”

He opens his mouth, and does not have to wait long before Calliope has his hair in her grip again, moving him to swallow Dream back down as she sets a gentle pace for them. Dream shudders and moans, his breath hitching when he feels himself barely brush the back of Hob’s throat. He tries to pull away slightly, but as he does Hob looks up at him, and Dream just knows he would be grinning if he could. He hooks his arms under Dream’s knees until his legs are over his shoulders, and ignores Calliope’s guiding hand in favor of pulling Dream close until his nose is pressing against his pelvis and Dream can feel him swallowing around him.

The cry Dream lets out is more like a muffled scream, his whole body going taut as he throws his head back against Calliope’s chest. When she laughs, it is not mean, or mocking. She just sounds happy.

“Someday,” she promises, “I will show you how to really fuck his face exactly how he likes.” Dream shudders at the words, and Calliope allows Hob another moment to choke on Dream’s prick before pulling him off. Hob sucks in a gasping breath, drool running down his chin, smiling and laughing even as Calliope turns her attention to him to chide him fondly, “But for now, we must be gentle with him, my love.” She wipes at the saliva on Hob’s face as she leans to kiss Dream’s cheek, “We have been too careless already.”

Whatever part of Dream’s brain that is still working wants to argue, but before he gets a chance, Hob is placing a kiss at the base of his cock, looking up at him warmly, “No argument here,” and then he is licking up the shaft and returns to the easy pace from before, and all Dream can do is whimper. 

Heat curls in the bottom of his stomach as he watches Hob’s head bob steadily. He is so caught up in the sensation, in Hob’s tongue swirling over the head of his dick, and Hob’s hands massaging his arse, and Calliope still idly stroking his nipples, that it takes him a moment to notice that his voice is not the only sound echoing through the room. Blinking dazedly, he realizes that Hob is moaning around him, and his hips are rutting desperately against the mattress, a dark spot spreading on the sheets where his precome is leaking. Behind him, Calliope’s breath is panting by his ear, and he feels the knuckles of her free hand brushing against his lower back rhythmically as she fingers herself.

Hob’s face is flushed, his tempo faltering as he climbs towards his peak, until Calliope has to grip his hair again to keep him steady. As she does, Dream can hear the slick, wet sounds behind him as her hips start canting to fuck herself on her own fingers. Her movements jostle Dream, each thrust of her hips pushing Dream’s into a mirroring thrust into Hob’s mouth. Dream isn’t even doing anything, is simply laying at their mercy and writhing at every pleasure they wring from him, and yet somehow, impossibly, he is surrounded by the evidence of their pleasure as well. 

Whining desperately, Dream moves one hand to grip at Calliope’s thigh, the other covering her’s over Hob’s hair, pushing back weakly, “I-... I’m going to-....” he tries to warn.

Calliope only grinds against him harder, her voice breathless as she keeps her hand on Hob’s head, “Go ahead,” she pants, “Let go, let him taste you, let us see you lose yourself with us.”

Hob hums in eager agreement and just like that Dream is coming hard. His fingers tighten on Calliope’s thigh and Hob’s hair, pressing them close as he throws his head back and keens, long and loud. Hob takes him as deep as he can go to swallow around every drop, and just as Dream is starting to come down, Hob lets out a strangled cry and Dream nearly shrieks in overstimulation. Calliope pulls Hob off and Dream realizes that he is coming too, his red, red lips hanging open and drool dripping from his chin as he moans, long stripes of come streaking between his legs. Finally, Calliope buries her face in Dream’s neck, her hand speeding up until Dream feels a puddle of wetness bloom on the mattress where their hips are pressed together. 

For a long moment, all three of them simply lay together, panting and boneless. Hob has collapsed forward, uncaring of laying in his own mess, resting his head on Dream’s stomach. Dream feels like a ragdoll, limbs loose and limp as he leans back heavily on Calliope. She in turn is curled forward, forehead pressed against Dream’s shoulder, her hips occasionally twitching with little aftershocks of her orgasm. 

Eventually, Calliope shifts, humming in contentment as she stretches an arm out to tug on a strand of Hob’s hair. When she has his attention, she crooks a finger still shiny with her own fluids at him, beckoning him to her. He smiles, and slides up Dream’s body languidly until they are chest to chest and Calliope can draw him into a deep kiss just over Dream’s shoulder. He watches with half-lidded eyes as Calliope licks into Hob’s mouth, and he can feel the way her chest rumbles with a noise of satisfaction. 

“Oh, Dream,” she purrs, and Dream blinks in surprise at being addressed as she runs her tongue across Hob’s lips, “you taste divine.”

Dream thinks his face might be on fire, and even as he ducks his head to hide his face in Hob’s chest, he is certain Hob must feel the heat on his skin. But Hob is nice enough not to say anything, petting Dream’s hair softly as Calliope allows him to lick her fingers clean.

Hob runs his tongue over her fingers thoroughly, moaning happily at the taste of both his lovers mingling in his mouth, “Truly, I’m being spoiled tonight,” Hob grinned, his voice rough and rasping in a way that only made Dream blush harder, “I thought this was supposed to be about Dream?”

Shyly, Dream raises his head from Hob’s chest. He knows that Hob is teasing, but he still feels the need to make sure they know, “I am… more than happy with the outcome of this evening,” he whispers.

“Hm, good,” Calliope tilts his head, kissing him softly, nearly chaste, “Tonight was a good start, I think.”

Dream blinked in confusion, “A… start?”

“Of course,” Hob chimed in, placing a finger under Dream’s chin to tilt his face up, “We haven’t even taken you on a date yet.”

It only makes him more confused, even as his heart flutters with something hopeful, “But… you already have me?”

His fondness for romance was something that has long been beaten down in him. When he wanted to do something for his partner, he was too much, he embarrassed them, and it was still never enough to forgive him his flaws. When he wanted something from them, a sign or a gesture or even just time together to make him feel wanted, he was high maintenance, spoiled, unreasonable.

“We’re already dating,” they’d say with rolled eyes, “That shit is for when you’re trying to get someone,” they’d grin meanly, “You’re already got.”

Romance was for his books, not his life. And yet, Hob tilted his head in curiosity “And we would like to keep you,” and he says it so easily, as if he is not the first person to ever express such a thing to Dream. He must see it though, in Dream’s glassy eyes, because his expression softens, and he strokes Dream’s cheek lovingly, “We want to treat you right. Give you all the good things you deserve. And that includes dates, and gifts, and excessive wooing.”

“And it will be excessive,” Calliope warns, “Now that it is allowed, we will both be broken floodgates of affection. You must tell us if it is ever too much.”

Dream shakes his head immediately, “You could never be too much,” he chokes out, lowering his gaze, “You don’t… you don’t have to…”

He jumps when he hears a thud and two yelps, looking up to find Calliope and Hob both holding a hand to their foreheads, having collided in their mutual rush to kiss him.

“Excuse you,” Calliope glares, voice haughty and offended, “it is my turn!” 

“It absolutely is not,” Hob pouts.

And whatever feelings were overwhelming Dream even a moment earlier evaporate as he claps a hand over his mouth to stifle his rasping giggles. He loves these two ridiculous people so much and he thinks- hesitantly, tentatively- that he might be allowed to.

This time, Calliope and Hob maneuver carefully around each other, each pressing kisses to Dream’s face and shoulders. When Dream’s laughter has died down and it feels safe to remove his hand from over his mouth, they carefully disentangle from one another.

“Come on, beautiful,” Hob says, and Dream flushes at the endearment, “Let’s get cleaned up. I’ll find some pajamas for you, then we’ll change the sheets and head to bed.”

Despite everything, Dream cannot help the words that bubble up in his chest. He just has to make sure, “I can stay?”

They look a little sad, but still don’t hesitate to both nod. “Of course,” Hob whispers, “We want you to stay.”

Calliope takes his hand, pressing a kiss to his knuckles, “And we will be here with you in the morning. And the day after that, and the day after that.”

“I’ll make you breakfast, because Calliope can’t cook. But she’ll make the coffee, because the machine hates me for some reason. And you can decide what we watch while we eat because neither of us can ever decide on a show and you always have good suggestions.” He turned to raise a teasing eyebrow at Calliope, “Am I wrong?”

To Dream’s relief and delight, Calliope only laughed, “It’s true, I have enjoyed all of his suggestions thus far. And left to our own devices, Hob and I will simply scroll for hours and not watch a single thing.”

Something in Dream’s heart blooms. He hadn’t even realized they’d been listening to him. Before, each time they’d finish, as they were getting dressed and making themselves presentable, Dream would recommend a show or a book or a movie. It was an easy script, something he could easily practice in his head beforehand and recite in the moment with ease. A little filler in the aftermath, a reassurance that Dream could talk like a normal person, a subtle implication that he thought of them outside of sex. Have you seen this show? Have you heard of this story? I think you’d like it. 

But he hadn’t really thought they were listening.

Dream does his best to move with them as seamlessly as they do each other, but each time he fumbles and finds himself in their way, they merely take it as an opportunity to ply him with kisses. They wipe each other down with warm washcloths, letting their hands linger longer than strictly necessary simply because they can. Hob and Calliope replace the sheets swiftly while Dream changes into his borrowed pajamas. The oversized tee continuously slips off his shoulder, and when Calliope and Hob see him they immediately begin elbowing at each other in their haste to put their mouths on the exposed skin. 

When they finally climb back into bed, they guide Dream into the center, slotting him between them as though he was made to be there. They pet his hair, and kiss him, and lace their fingers together over the dip of his waist. They fall asleep quickly, easily, as though Dream’s presence has not disrupted them at all. He stays awake as long as he can, savoring the feeling of their bodies surrounding him. He places his hand carefully on top of theirs, holding his breath. When they do not stir, he releases it slowly, allowing his eyes to finally drift shut. 

Dream falls asleep, three hands tangled together, and thinks he might actually have a place here.

[roryonic]

DVD Commentary: Battleships and Love Boats

Another for the vault @shamelessdvdcommentary :)

Idk who requested me, but thank you a whole lot <3 it's nice to be thought of. Since I don't know which story anon would like to know about, I thought I'd pick the biggest and baddest hahah

Give us some stats - (when you wrote it, word count, how long it took to finish, is it a one-shot/multi-chapter, etc)

Published June 24th, 2023 (same day I finished In Another World). Wrote and posted one chapter (ish) every day. Finished it about 2 months later.

Chapters? 106

Word count? 238,315

What was the initial inspiration for your story?

Smut.

No, really.

I vaguely dabbled with smut in In Another World, so I wanted to truly try my hand at it in a story that was meant to have it. I also knew I wanted to write a story where they were a bit younger because I like all the angsty drama hahah

If the story is written from a character’s POV, why did you choose this character?

I almost always write in dual POV. To me, it makes sense because both Ian and Mickey have an equal say about their relationship. It's also such a nice break to be able to jump into one's head when I so please.

What was your favourite scene to write?

Chapter 51 - Boyfriend.

I loooove the casual (semi) PDA and the calm of them both when they're finally together. Details and absentminded touches are my cryptonite, so I adore how they act in that chapter as they're looking at cars. They're dialogue is also adorable (if I may say so myself lol)

How did you come up with the title?

Titles are the first thing I come up with when I'm writing a story and more or less build everything off of that vibe. I think I heard or read Battleships and Love Boats somewhere, but I can't remember where, and it just stuck.

Fitting, though, I think. Both love and calm, but also battles and uncertainty.

Was there anything you struggled to write? If so, how did you overcome this?

Smut hahah

It's time to face the facts that I will never be an excellent smut writer and I am fine with that. I cringe too much of myself to write too explicitly. Too innocent for this.

Favourite line in the story?

“Jesus Chr—fuck,” Ian spoke breathlessly and dropped his head back a bit too far, consequently banging it against the wall.

The one that started it all hahah

Did the storyline change in any way as you wrote the story?

Oh my god, if it did.

Let's just say that the story you start reading is not the story you end with. But, again, I don't map out my stories if I can help it.

What are you most proud about in the story? (plot, characterisation, dialogue, twist/cliffhanger, etc)

Dialogue.

I think I had their voices etched into my brain stem at that point. If I can't hear the characters say their lines, I don't write it.

Reading back the story now, is there anything you’d change or add?

I wish I had gotten Mickey his car. Sorry, Mick.

If you’ve chosen your most popular story, are you surprised by the popularity?

Very much surprised.

After I wrote In Another World, which became quite successful, I didn't think I could replicate anything like the warm reception that it got.

I was wrong.

Battleship, you exceeded all expectations.

Did you have a beta or a friend who helped you as you wrote?

Alexa! Play "All by myself" - Celine Dion!

Ask your followers to pick a snippet (no more than 500 words) and share your thoughts about it.

[starlightvld]

20 Qᴜᴇꜱᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ꜰɪᴄ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇʀꜱ

Tagged by the lovely @snarky-magpie - thank you!!

1. How many works do you have on A03? 13 (for now...☺️)

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 429,228

3. What fandoms do you write for? Voltron: Legendary Defender and Call of Duty: MW Reboot

4. What are your top five fics by kudos? - Couch Surfing (COD, soapghost) - Broken Bones & Shattered Hearts (COD, soapghost) - Up in Smoke (COD, soapghost) - Formalities (Voltron, sheith) - Research and Development (Voltron, sheith)

5. Do you respond to comments? YES. I love talking to people in the comments. 😍

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Probably Couch Surfing because it's an "in progress" ending. But it's still mostly happy because I can't really write anything else. LOL

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Probably Formalities? But all of them are pretty tooth-rotting...

8. Do you get hate on fics? No

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes, but it's always slow burn smut with feelings (hi, I'm ace).

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I love thinking about crossovers, but I haven't written any yet (unless you count the AU from question 13, I guess).

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Not that I know of.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? The soapghost Punisher AU I'm working on with @kibagib - You're my mask, you're my cover, my shelter - is basically co-written. Kiba gives me the outline for what they want to happen in the scene, and I write it out, adding my own flare here and there. It's been so much fun to work together to bring Kiba's visions to life!

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? As much as I love soapghost, I think sheith will always have my heart.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? So far, I've finished or am actively working on all my WIPs... 😯 I do have an idea for a soapghost inter-dimensional-travel, angst-with-a-bittersweet ending fic, but that one hasn't gotten past outline phase. That's the closest I have to a fic I might never finish. (This fic would also win "angstiest ending," btw.)

16. What are your writing strengths? I think I write dialogue and emotions/introspection pretty well.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I struggle with descriptions - they are often what I "add in" during the editing phases. I'm also a VERY SLOW writer, which is why it takes so long to update sometimes.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I don't do it unless I have a native speaker willing to help me with the translation. Otherwise, it's just English but in italics. LOL

19. First fandom you wrote for? Dragon Age (long ago with a different user name)

20. Favourite fic you’ve written? I love them all, but my first sheith fic - In Sunshine and in Shadow - will always be special to me because it helped me process that atrocious VLD ending.

Tagging... errmmmm... @oodelally9 @kayluvlygrey @hawkeykirsah @ticktockclockwork @ursae-minoris-world @insomnikat-mused @chalkofthevalley

No pressure! Ignore or play as you like!

[not-poignant]

It never used to be, but put like 200~ written sex scenes behind you, and one day as you keep trying to make them better and better they suddenly just become more challenging than the average action scene. (Because they are a kind of action scene).

I relate to this on a spiritual level. When I've done something enough times and have become good at it it starts to get difficult again. It's kind of a paradox. But I've learned that once I let go of always trying to improve something I'm already good at or 'make it better' I actually rediscover my enjoyment.

Your stories are some of the best I've read. And your smut is amazing because there's always worldbuilding and character development behind it. Perhaps I'm biased because I'm demisexual and I need emotional components to enjoy the smexy stuff 😅 But it honestly doesn't bother me that you don't write pure smut anymore.

Obviously i hope you don't stop writing it completely (I'd be sad if you only wrote gen fics going forward but I'd still read and love them) but you gotta do whatever's best for you. And if that means no longer writing sex scenes then so be it.

But just know that you don't have to get better at it because you're already the cream of the crop as far as I'm concerned.

Maybe you just need a break from writing that sort of stuff? You might rediscover your love for it after some time away. Just food for thought.

Anyway... looking forward to whatever you write in the future. We'll support you no matter what <3

Hi anon,

This is super kind, and I have definitely taken lengthy breaks from writing erotica (literally almost over a year). In fact two of my main stories over the last few years - Falling Falling Stars and The Nascent Diplomat haven't had smut in them partly for that reason.

Unfortunately it's still just a struggle. We all have things that don't come easily to us. I can generate characters as easily as breathing, and dialogue / character voice is an instinctive, natural skill. But erotica is just... yeah, challenging.

I definitely don't plan on stopping writing it! A bunch of my stories right now have smut in them and are going to have smut in them going forward. :D

I can't see me ever just writing gen honestly.

But yeah I've taken very very long sabbaticals from writing smut. The reality is even these days I can go 2-3 months without writing any, which is kind of amazing, because I write over 100k words in those 2-3 months. So there's definitely breaks happening.

I don't know that I am good at erotica, though I appreciate that you think so! I'm a bit unconventional re: how lengthy my erotica scenes are (and how character-growth focused they are lol), but AO3 taught me and I prefer AO3 sex scenes over all others.

...I wandered away from this post for 5 hours and then came back like 'oh you didn't press post to this yet?' so anyway sadlfkjjas I may be having problems writing smut for a wHOLE lot of additional reasons too lmao

[chunkypossum]

Thank you for the tags guys (@jules-writes-stories @fieldofdaisiies @highlordofkrypton)

1. How many works do you have on AO3? More than I realized. 18.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 552,788 Azris week put me over 500k and I forgot to document!!

3. What fandoms do you write for? ACOTAR

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Kerosene 

So I Start to Say Goodbye ( I have started hyper fixating on the long fic this one inspired. It's .... so.... sad. Praying for a happy ending though)

Come Hel or High Lord ( I should really finish this one... ooops)

Mother Save Us From Your Twisted fate (send help... part two is struggling to get written)

By Solstice End (16,588 words)

5. Do you respond to comments? YES! I am here. to word vomit about the things I can't stop thinking about... I love to talk about them. TALK TO ME

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? sans keurig incident I think I have done a pretty good job of leaving everyone with something happy at the end. All eyes on Eris week though. It's not going to end well ... most angsty I guess would have to be Once Upon a Dream

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Probably Kerosene OR Mother Save Us From Your Twisted fate because of the pain you had to go through to get there.

8. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes but only where it makes sense in a story I am telling. Writing it is so embarrassing and I'm more into the emotional yearning of it all than how horny I can make something. I let other people fill that part of the fandom bc they are infinitely better at it than me.

9. Do you write crossovers? Come Hel or High Lord has the entire MAASiverse cast and I will NEVER do that again LOL.... It's so difficult to deal with all these personalities

10. Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope

11. Have you ever co-written a fic before? When I was in High School my BFF and I handwrote Roswell (1999 version bc I am OLD) fanfic together. I WISH I could find those notebooks.

12. What is your all-time favorite ship? Forever in my heart of hearts it will be Satosugu for the absolutely beautiful tragedy that they are. They are PAINFUL to even think about but I love them more than anything. Azris is a CLOSE second and they are how I am funneling all of my Satosugu angst and pain bc writing for Satosugu is too painful and I don't think I would be good at it.

13. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I refuse to consider a world where I don't finish all of them HOWEVER... this one is going to give me the most trouble. I have a very specific vision and it's HARDDDDDDD ... When Even Moonlight Burns 

14. What are your writing strengths? I'm hopeful that I paint the emotion of a scene as well as I feel I do sometimes

15. What are your writing weaknesses?  There are too many to list. I chase the dopamin and as a result... I am not craft focused. Vibes all the way

16. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I am not fluent enough in anything else to be able to pull it off. I do enjoy reading and writing it in small quips and phrases though.

17. First fandom you wrote for? Again... Roswell (1999) and oh Buffy I think... first one I am actually writing and posting for though is ACOTAR

18. Favorite fic you’ve written? I am just really proud ot have been able to finish the monster of a fic that was Kerosene and will always love it for being my first but I have a couple coming up that the concepts make my toes curl and I can't wait to get out of my head!!! LIVE MY BABIES LIIIIVE (ironic bc my boys won't always lol)

Pressuring y'all next: @born-to-riot @acourtofladydeath @thelovelymadone @brunetterebel010

[morelikeravenbore]

🦋 Thanks to the cuties who have tagged me in this, I've loved reading everyone's answers!

How many works do you have on AO3? Uhh *checks* — nine. One long fic and a bunch of oneshots.

What's your total AO3 word count? 88k~ but about 76k~ belong to Villain (so far).

What fandoms do you write for? Hogwarts Legacy is the only fandom I write for, and Sebastian is really the only character I care to write about (HAHA sorry everyone else.)

Top five fics by kudos? I don't really pay attention to stats so:

1. How to Make a Villain

And then whatever the next top four are 🙃

Do you respond to comments? I TRY VERY HARD TO but sometimes it takes me a while (spoons/adhd-brain/burn-out etc). Like any writer, comments give me LIFE, but something I wasn't expecting to struggle with is the feeling that I don't really deserve them. Who knew writing fic would be a lesson in accepting kindness lol

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Welp the only fics I've finished so far are my oneshots, and they all end with orgasms or romance so... 

What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Here Comes The Sun: a cute little Sebaura proposal oneshot hehe 💍🌞

Do you get hate on fics? Not openly, lol. I do love it when people get mad about what my characters do though so pls don't hold back from yelling at them if the urge ever strikes you. 🍿🍿🍿

Do you write smut? I dabble every now and then, but to be honest it's not my favourite thing to write. Before writing for HL, I'd never written a sex scene in my life and I wanted to give it a go to challenge myself. Lately though, I haven't really had any smutty motivation. I'm definitely a romantic at heart and I LOVE writing about the playful side of romance: young love, cute banter, silliness, teasing, etc. Also bickering. Nom nom nom gimme all da arguments.

Craziest crossover? You and me bb :lip_bite:

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Nope! Does this really happen? Like, someone copies and pastes a whole-ass fic and calls it their own? 🧿🧿🧿

Have you ever had a fic translated? I've had requests to translate Villain into Russian, Polish and French, but I'd like to complete the story first.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Does contributing crack fic ideas counts? Because 👀 yeah all the time lol 

All time favorite ship? Uhhh Sebastian and Aurélie HAHA. Otherwise, it's Allie and Noah foreverrrrr. (The movie version though, I've never actually read the book.)

💙 Honourable mentions go to Anne and Gilbert, and Emma and Mr Knightly. Dishonourable mention to Harry and Ginny, eurgh. 

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I only have enough spoons to write one long fic at a time, and I fully intend to finish Villain even if it kills me.

What are your writing strengths? Personally, I think my writers voice sounds distinctly me, which I'm very proud of.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language? OOH this is a great question since Aurélie is fluent in French and I don't speak a bloody word. Generally speaking, I prefer to write it like: 'I can't speak a word of French,' she said in French. 

Sometimes I'll use French if the meaning is clear to someone who doesn't speak the language, or if I can give strong enough context clues, ie:

'How nice,' Aurélie said eventually, her accent thick with French indignation. 'I can see you're both very passionnés about Quidditch.'

Sebastian froze, sensing danger.

'Uh — Passionate?'

'Oui. I did not realise you had to undress yourself to discuss tactique.' 

Or if the POV character can accurately guess the meaning, like this:

'You don't have giant spiders in France then, I take it?'

'Non pas du tout!'

He didn't need to know French to translate that as a vehement no. 

But I try to avoid using the actual written language as much as possible because nothing kills immersion faster than trying to read dialogue you can't understand.

Also I frequently annoy my French friends for translations because uhh if I used Google Translate they'd probably guillotine me hehe.

First fandom you wrote in? This one.

Favorite fic you've written? How to Make a Villain is absolutely my greatest writing achievement ever hahaha. But aside from that, I'm really proud of Noctilucent because my goal was to write something suggestive without making it smutty and I was quite pleased with the outcome.

🦋 np tags for my writer babes and anyone else who wants to join in: @galaxiasgreen @lyworth @sloanesallow @sunsetplums @gingerlegacy07

[lusthurts]

writing meme about me!

no official tag but thought maybe time to share more about myself! mostly because I want to know more about you all as well, and @sperrywink extended an invite to seblaine mutuals so I will do the same!

How did you get into writing fanfiction?

I discovered it on accident as most of us do - I was on the Glee wiki I think? There was a link to select fanfics on the ship pages at the time, and I started reading one of the Finchel ones, and it was game over for me lol - I started writing my own a while after that, and I participated in a variety of Glee RPGs that inspired me to write other characters. I was in one of those massive Glee RPGs in like 2011 on fanfiction.net, and it was very formative for me in terms of connecting with the rest of the fandom and wanting to do more of that. RPGs are also so great for exposing you to ships you never would've liked or even thought of before, although all my current ships came from elsewhere lol

oh, and there was the whole escapism from family shit that was going down at the time thing - that was a huge factor for sure

2. How many fandoms have you written in?

I've almost exclusively been writing for the Glee fandom since the beginning, although the ships I've written for have changed drastically throughout that time. I've dabbled in some other things as well depending on my special interest at the moment, but I always come back to Glee. Other fandoms I've written for include The Outsiders, Degrassi, How I Met Your Mother, 13 Reasons Why, Girl Meets World, and Skam ! none of these are published anywhere anymore though as far as I know, it's all far too embarrassing (and yes I'm aware that's the most bizarre mix of fandoms ever)

3. How many years have you been writing fanfiction?

at least 12, I wanna say I started around 2012ish?

4. Do you read or write more fanfiction?

I genuinely think it's about equal, but it comes in waves. Sometimes I'm reading more, sometimes I'm writing more. I'm almost always working on something and I'm also almost always in the middle of reading a long fic.

5. What is one way you've improved as a writer?

I think I've gotten a lot better at writing comedy and ensemble dialogue. I like writing the silly goofy scenes with large friend groups a lot, especially when I feel like I've nailed the character's voices enough that I don't even need dialogue tags to know who said each line.

6. What's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

Ohio geography lmao - I like always have Google Maps pulled up trying to map out different locations and how far drives would be, etc. I also have researched a ton about various colleges (especially for my current WIP since these characters are actively applying for college rn) and France (never been there, constantly have to write stuff that takes place there).

7. What's your favorite type of comment to receive on your work?

I genuinely do love all comments! I especially loves one that are specific/mention parts of the chapter or the fic that they enjoyed or thoughts that they had while reading. I also like chatting about the characters and canon and their predictions/hopes for the rest of the fic. The length doesn't really matter so much - I love long comments and short comments, and I try my best to respond to all of them.

8. What's the most fringe trope/topic you write about?

Idk I kinda write a lot of infidelity and toxic relationship stuff. Seblaine is the main ship I write for nowadays, and the nature of their relationship lends itself to a lot of infidelity in their process of getting together. I also just love writing angst, so even when I'm writing established relationships, they end up being sort of toxic throughout especially given the traits of both characters. I just find it more fun and probable to write a slightly toxic relationship than a 100% healthy one.

9. What is the hardest type of story for you to write?

PWP - I struggle so much with writing smut, although I like to think I've gotten a bit better at it recently. I'm also trying to get better at writing ensemble fics, but it's definitely a struggle for me to give each ship/character enough attention. And I'm pretty awful at world building, so anything remotely fantasy, sci fi, etc. is a huge struggle for me.

10. What is the easiest type?

slow burns! I've gotten so much better at delaying the characters from getting together for a really long time in fics and it's soooo fun. I prefer a character centric slow burn with lots of sexual tension and an arc that involves characters moving from enemies/friends/strangers to lovers over the course of many months or years.

11. Where do you do your writing? What platform? When?

I like to write outside of my own home - something about physically relocating makes me way more productive. I write a ton on planes (I travel a lot for work). I also love a good coffee shop, Panera, park, library, etc.

I write in Word and publish to AO3 - used to write in Google Docs but it's so slow and laggy so I much prefer Word. Used to publish on fanfiction.net but I will never go anywhere else now that I've transitioned to AO3, the far superior fanfic site lol

I am most productive with writing either during the day if I'm somewhere other than at home or in the middle of the night in bed - my most productive hours at home are between like midnight and 3 am

12. What is something you've been too nervous/intimidated to write, but would love to write one day?

I recently got over my fear of PWP and published a one shot that I'm very proud of. I have many ideas for things similar that I'd like to work through in the future!!

Most of this is fandom specific though - I'm super intimidated to write for big fandoms because I've gotten so comfortable in the Glee fandom, especially writing Seblaine which has a relatively small audience in comparison. I'd love to write Marauders, but that fandom is HUGE and very intimidating because there is so much lore and fanon to mess up. I hope to give it a shot one day though!

13. What made you choose your username?

it's a song lyric! lust hurts comes from the song "Barcelona Boots" by Arlie - the lyric goes "Lust hurts, could you bear it for me?" and I thought that was very fitting for someone like me who's obsessed with romance in fiction but can't be bothered with it in my real life

any of my mutuals are welcome to participate! I'll specifically throw in a tag for @daisyishedwig @calsvoid @xonceinadream @andyandersmythe bc these are the ones that come up first when I go to tag haha

[rdng1230]

10 questions for writers

I was tagged by @racerchix21

how many works do you have on ao3? 4, I’m super new to actually publishing anything. I didn’t even start reading fic until like 2 years ago. But when I was a teen I would write out little scenes on actual paper just for fun, usually little bonus scenes or codas from whatever episode of something I liked that had aired that week.

total word count: 14k ish? But by the end of the multi chapter it’ll probably be at least 20k.

What fandoms do you write for?: unpublished stuff for MASH, OUAT (god that was so long ago), I’m sure there’s a few buffy or firefly scenes in a notebook somewhere. My first published thing was a couple months ago when the Young Royals finale came out, and now I’m writing for 911. But who knows where the hyperfixation train will lead me next!

Do you respond to comments why or why not?: YES!!! I might let it go if it’s a couple emojis or something like that but I love thanking and chatting with my readers in the comments. Particularly for my current saltommy fic, going insane with my rarepair friends sustains me 🙏.

Have you ever had a fic stolen ?: not that I’m aware. I didn’t even know people did that that seems real shitty.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? : I’ve not but I’m open to it. Particularly when it comes to smut which is a little out of my league at the moment. There are parts of me that want to hand off what I’m currently writing to the incredibly talented smut writers I know and just be like “ok have em back by the ole post orgasm cuddle” but I will be BRAVE dammit.

what’s your all time favorite ship: oh Jesus. Never ask me a favorite, unless you want to get a list as long as your arm. I’d say probably wayhaught, Nomanita, spuffy, percabeth, phryne x Jack, captain swan, RoyJamie, beejhawk, madney, grace x Judd, LoVe, Malec, everlark, and Janto.

what are your writing strengths?: I don’t feel like I even know that yet. I think I’m pretty good at banter, I’m good at sweet fluffy domestic stuff as long as I can throw an angsty wrench in the middle 😘. I’m definitely good at throwing in way too many movie references that my readers have to suffer through.

what are your writing weaknesses?: lol smut can’t be a weakness if at time of writing I have not tried yet, but I’m sure it’ll be ruuuuuusty while I get it figured out. One stupid thing I do struggle with is giving my characters my accent/dialect! I am constantly writing stuff like “y’all” or “I was Fixin’ to ___” and then having to delete it because no, that born and bred Italian American Angeleno would not fucking say that.

what was the first fandom you wrote for?: I know there had to have been earlier ones but the first I actually remember is OUAT when I definitely shoulda been paying attention to my 7th grade English teacher. First published is Young Royals though (I really had to get august out of the monarchy y’all)

No pressure tags: @ohlookitsthearkhamknight @herrmannhalsteadproduction @desert--moonchild @swiftietartt @cliophilyra

[claudiajcregg]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by @mihrsuri. Thanks, Lil! I feel like I've answered these in the not-so-distant past, and might have accidentally ignored one or more tags. Oops. I need to check the Mentions tab and check it out!

(I also started writing this… earlier this week, and forgot about the tab. Sorry this is so so long.)

01. how many works do you have on ao3? 24 fics, though one of them has eight ficlets… So some would count it as 31. (It's still 24.)

02. what's your total ao3 word count? 167,815 words

03. what fandoms do you write for? TWW.

04. top five fics by kudos?

maybe everything's just turning out how it should be

(big gulf here)

say it's here where our pieces fall in place

just your smile lit a sixty-watt bulb in my house that was darkened for days

nobody knows how to get back home

we could be the way forward and I know I'll pay for it 

05. do you respond to comments? Yes! I try to get to all of them, and feel bad when I hoard them (because they're lovely) or they slip through the cracks. (I tend to wait some time before replying to the comments on my most recent fic, so if anything comes in later, it might be immediate or two months late.)

06. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I feel like I always struggle with this answer because they're mostly hopeful endings! Which is just my perception and now how it is. Tempted to go check what I've answered in the past.

Most recently, I think what if the way you hold me is actually what's holy has that 'right person, wrong time', on borrowed time vibes. But maybe not! My go-to answer always feels like my post-Portland Trip fic, don't want you to go but I'll be okay, because it feels so final and bittersweet then.

07. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oh, which one should I pick? I think the Cali/Jan 22nd fic from earlier this year (oh, and I will be with you to feel the California sun) is just pure happiness, tbh. Memoir fic (still you never took your hand from mine) also feels like a saccharine, sweet ending! (Could've also picked the literal wedding reception-set fic, lol.)

08. do you get hate on fic? No! Luckily. If I have, I don't remember. I've gotten a weird comment or two, but those weren't about the fics. So no!

09. do you write smut? Nooooo, of course not. (This is the last time I'll beg you to read on main and that's under a cut lol.) Up till now I could say it was mild scenes in yet-to-be-posted fics, which remains true, but I posted a literal smutty fic last Friday, lol. I'm proud of it and myself, for getting out of my comfort zone, and while it's flopping I'm glad those who've read it liked it!

10. craziest cross over? This is the question that undoubtedly makes me go “lol I've definitely done this before.” Because I always joke that I've already seen the craziest canon crossovers on screen. That said, I haven't personally written one, and don't have ideas.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen? No? Sometimes I wonder if some ideas have been borrowed but wouldn't say stolen.

12. have you ever had a fic translated? No! Maybe one day I'll do it myself. (I don't think there's demand for it/Spanish-written fics in this fandom.) (Once again, I'm sure that this answer matches the previous ones.)

13. have you ever co-written a fic before? Sounds fun! No. But anyone interested? hmu.

14. all-time favorite ship? In what sense? I cannot choose, but at the same time… We all know.

15. what's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I don't like putting this energy out in the universe. It's one thing to post (that's probably a long list) but actual WIPs that are worth it? I want to believe I'll get to them eventually. (But. Unfortunately, the answer is many of them.)

16. what are your writing strengths? Internal world? As in, I am “good” at describing the internal world of a character. idk.

17. what are your writing weaknesses? I write in my second language. I feel like everything's a weakness. (World building, descriptions, dialogue.)

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language? As long as it doesn't take the reader out (and makes sense in the story), 👍 I might have peppered in some Spanish in some of my writing but it feels wrong somehow.

19. first fandom you wrote in? Bones.

20. favorite fic you've written? I cannot pick a favorite child. I can affectionately call them flops because they mostly are, stats-wise, but there's something about them that I love. And I feel like some of my favorite stuff is what's not yet posted! Because it stops feeling “mine” once it's out there.

don't want you to go but I'll be okay · Portland fic · my automatic answer because I felt it was special the second I finished it. So many things came together (that quote, particularly).

we could be the way forward and I know I'll pay for it · St Augustine, a precanon campaign fic ·(Any of the first four (posted in 2021) is super special to me. This one was another one I knew would be special. And it has big “there wouldn't be this if there hadn't been you” energy.

your love is a secret I'm hoping, dreaming, dying to keep · (3+1 fic set in the last third of S7, ft the press corps) · Taylor sang KOMH on N2 because she loved this. I just know it. (I just really love secret relationships/working around that S7 period so much.)

nobody knows how to get back home · itsotg missing scen) · I just like it a lot, and it's also a good candidate for angsty ending. When did it get so many kudos?!

maybe everything's just turning out how it should be · big block of cheese 2008 · felt disingenuous not to include the fic I always knew I wanted to post, even if it's another early one. It's my most popular by a huge margin, and I'm glad.

I so wanted to add fics like the Cali one but this always depends on my mood! So this is the answer that might always change haha.

Shoutout to some unposted ones that I love but won't get published. Or others perpetually in limbo, like the two big multichapters (IM and S5 pregnancy). I feel like some of my best stuff is in What Once Was Ours (the IM AU fic I wrote in 2021), or the S5 Pregnancy AU (which I hope to finish this summer! And I want to start posting once I feel like I'll make that deadline)… And I'm currently really fond of one I've started to call “demons that you know raise hell worse than a stranger.” Coming to you soon, if I get my crap together!

[justhere4thevibez]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by @staceymcgillicuddy @cyraclove and @bibiche007 thanks guys 💛💛💛

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

32! I can't believe it!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

420,197 which is insane!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Stranger Things, hellcheer specifically

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Long Is the Road Out of Hell (dnd au)

The Interview (college/fake dating au)

Hold Onto Me (vampire au)

Cooking Up Something Sweet (rockstar social media au)

Waiting For This Moment (flower shop/tattoo parlor au)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I try to respond to every single comment! They took the time to give me a comment, why wouldn't I take the time to thank them for it?

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

That's tough, because I always try to give hellcheer a happy ending - they deserve it! But Release My Inner Fantasy, despite being almost purely smut, definitely has the angstiest ending. (although it might be slightly cheating since it is part of an ongoing series, and I do intend to give them an eventual happy ending)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Again, I love to write happy endings! So most of my fics are very happy at the close. But Hooked on a Feeling might be my most sappy-sweet ending. It's definitely one of my more lighthearted fics!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

honestly, no! the hellcheer fandom overall has been very kind to me. the closest I get to hate on fics is people wishing/asking me to do something different than I've already done (i.e. write an alternate ending because they didn't want A or B in it), which can be very discouraging. but I don't get that a lot!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do! However, I had never written actual smut in my life until this year, so I'm still pretty new at it

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Not really. The closest I've ever gotten to a crossover is crossover elements loosely integrated in a fic. Devil in the Woods, for example, uses bits and pieces from things like little red riding hood and beauty and the beast while remaining very much its own thing!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of! And I'd very much like to keep it that way

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

i don't think so! but i'd be honored if somebody did

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I haven't, but I have a lovely friend who betas for me on occasion and we bounce ideas back and forth so much it sometimes feels like cowriting ( @slumped-in-the-arms-of-fiction )

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

hellcheer, if you couldn't tell 😉

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I intend to finish every single wip I have going atm (As well as a few on the back burner lol). but sometimes it feels like i'm never going to finish them, especially when i'm on the very last chapters. why does it always work like that???

16. What are your writing strengths?

I feel like i'm pretty good at writing intimate scenes. and by that i mean scenes where not a lot's going on, where a small group of characters (usually two) can be together or have a conversation that doesn't do much for the plot but sheds a lot of light on the characters themselves (both to the readers and within the story between characters)

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I'm very undisciplined with writing habits, i don't write every day or have certain goals. i struggle to describe people and scenery in a concrete way that is integrative with the story itself.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

find a native speaker and get (and listen to) their feedback. whether it's tenses, phrases, or cultural tendencies, let someone who's actually the expert be the expert.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

hellcheer! unless you count me scribbling in my journal when i was about eight, writing a boxcar children story because i'd heard that they employed ghost writers and i thought "i could do that!" i wrote like half a dozen sentences, convinced i was going to become employed by the boxcar children publisher.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

honestly? probably Devil in the Woods. it's the one i go back to the most when i need a comfort read.

Tagging @slumped-in-the-arms-of-fiction @sloelimbs@ebongawk and anyone else who wants to join!

[homesickwhispers]

Love your most recent fic. Don’t ever stop writing 💕

omg beautiful anon, you’re gonna make me cry 😭😭😭😭 in years of writing no one has ever told me that and now that you have I get to know how its the best feeling in the world!! thank you for seeing me and reading my words <33 they only make sense when they are seen by amazing people like you!

when you mention my most recent fic, are you talking about Care? because if its, this just makes your comment even more special considering I was kinda nervous to put this one out since the story brings up some specific struggles that are not frequently showed and I didn’t know if my followers would like it.🥲

I love the idea of writing those fics that show yk how real life people have sex.. especially when it mentions the struggles some women go through. I think its something we do need to talk about more.

as someone with POS and endometriosis I had and still have various difficulties when it comes to being intimate with someone. Sometimes there’s pain, I rarely have any sex drive, and after 20 years of living I am well aware I need a patient partner who is willing to give me lots of foreplay (Never met one but who knows lol) and these things, and the fact that I practically never had any sexual interaction my whole life lol actually made me cling a lot onto reading smut stuff.

I want women to feel comfortable writing my stories, I want people like me to know that there is still hope, that they can feel good and loved by someone and that they can and they will have smutty stories written by them despite their condition :,)

and tbh at this point, I don’t think I could quit writing even if I tried 🥹, the urge always comes back to me at some point, as I said to my friend today my mind is always working on scenes, even when I’m not actively writing, so thank God it’s a natural passion that fulfills me a lot.

thank you again for your words, they mean more to me than you can ever imagine. wish I could give you a very long hug rn 🫂 hope you’re having an amazing day, bc you just made mine so much better!

[browneyeddevil]

Twenty Questions: Fanfic author edition

thank you to both @goldenslumberowo and @thesweetnessofspring for tagging me! sorry it's taken me so long to get to this

How many works do you have on ao3?

I have 10 works

2) What's your ao3 wordcount?

85,510 - which is an absurd amount given how irregularly I post

3) What fandoms do you write for?

The Hunger Games. I have thought about branching out but nothing has really inspired me quite like The Hunger Games has :)

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

The Brightest Timeline - Canon divergent Silence me, Trust me, Love me - Post canon The Elephant in the Room - Post canon The unlikely Coming-of-Age of Katniss Everdeen - Canon divergent Isn't it Strange - Post canon

5) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try my very best to respond to all the lovely comments readers leave. I appreciate them a whole lot and find them very encouraging, I also just like to hear what readers are thinking, especially for multi-chapter works. Although, I admit, sometimes it takes me a while to respond, and there are occasions where I just straight up forget for a couple years.

6) What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

It'd probably have to be Underground; I kind of killed off Peeta 👀. It's a brief canon-divergent one-shot during Mockingjay that more or less focuses on Katniss and her grief and anger. In retrospect, it's kind of like the evil twin of "The Brightest Timeline" in which Peeta is rescued from the Capitol unhijacked.

7) What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Ohhh, Full Circle no debate. It's the happiest fic I've written, full stop. It's post-canon. Prim is alive, and Peeta and Katniss find each other again. All quite sweet and fluffy.

8) Do you get hate on fics?

Not to my knowledge. People have been critical of some of my earlier works, sort of disagreeing with my interpretations of a character, but I wouldn't call that hate. I hope I don't ever have to encounter the more vitriolic side of fandom.

9) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Noooo. I get nervous when describing a kiss that isn't chaste lol. I just don't think I'm very good at it, to be honest. I have considered writing more steamy scenes, especially for my WIP's, but I just don't think I'm there yet as a writer.

10) Do you write crossovers?

No. But never say never.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge. I don't think my work is really popular enough to have to worry about that lolll.

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but I'd be fine with it if I was asked first :) I think it would be super cool.

13) Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

No, but I wouldn't be against the idea, per se. I'd just feel super guilty, my schedule is very unpredictable and I wouldn't want someone else having to deal with my erratic writing habits, it's bad enough that I do lol.

14) What's your all-time favourite ship?

Gotta be Everlark for sure.

15) What's a WIP that you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Oof. I mean... if I'm honest Stop the Clocks, I think for me to be able to finish that I'd have to sit down and plan it out properly. It's also just always been a fic that I've struggled to sit dow and actually write for. In short, it needs a LOT of work and care. It's not badly written, buttt it's also not the best.

16) What are your writing strengths?

I'm pretty good at descriptions and being able to bring a setting alive. I've been told that I write very in-character and that my characters are consistent, which is nice because writing a character's inner monologue comes quite naturally to me.

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

I struggled for a long time with writing natural and organic dialogue; it has definitely become easier with time and practice, but it's still something that I obsess over a little. Also, transition paragraphs are the bane of my existence and I tend to avoid them where possible.

18) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I'd definitely be comfortable with writing in German as it's my second language. I'm currently learning Spanish, so maybe? I think it would depend on the complexity of what the character is trying to say. I think anything else, no. Not without consulting someone who speaks the language first anyway. I've seen first-hand how google translate can butcher simple phrases lol.

19) First fandom you wrote for?

The Hunger Games! My one and only 😍

20) Favourite fic you've ever written?

Isn't it Strange 100%. I put a lot of care and thought into it and it will always have a place in my heart. Rereading it there are some things that I would phrase differently now; and a part of me itches to change it, but another part would rather leave it as a time capsule to display my younger self's writing and how much I've improved since then. Weirdly enough though, it's just one of those fics that never got much attention lol *wink wink nudge nudge*.

This was super fun, so thanks again for tagging me!

I don't know who has or hasn't participated already so if anyone wants to hop on feel free to :)

[legend-of-cupcake]

Thank you for the tag @krispyt <33

1. How many works do you have on Ao3?

I have 7 under my name and 1 anon, although I'm just going to put it back under my name I think.

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?

147,865

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Mostly for TBHK, but I have a couple for Genshin as well! However writing for TBHK is more comfortable for me

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Red String of fate (1,159)

Clean Slate (357) ((This is the fic under anon but I'm going to change it probably lol))

I love you, please don't go (204)

Under the Red Crescent Moon, I Could Hear the Demons Whispering (195)

Kindness from the Devil (185)

5. Do you respond to comments?

I used to, but honestly I'm terrible at it now. I don't go on my account very often anymore and I don't receive emails when I get comments (personal choice), so it can be a long time before I see if anyone's left anything. But I do always try to get back to them!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I love you, please don't go wins this I think.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Uhhh, I'm not really sure? But I'm going to go with chapter 20 of Red String of Fate. After so many near kisses throughout the fic, having HanaNene finally get their kiss makes this the happiest ending... Probably idk XD

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No, thank goodness.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Welllllll, I've tried to write smut. But I just don't have the knack for it, I can't handle the cringe while writing it and I can't read it back.

10. Do you write crossovers?

No and I never will. Nothing personal but I hate crossovers.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

My fics aren't good enough to steal lmao

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I'm open to it!

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

HanaNene, HanaNene, HanaNene!!

If the day ever comes where no one supports HanaNene, it's because I've died. I will never not love those 2.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I don't even have a proper name for this WIP, it's called Possession AU in my documents. It was a KouNene fic, but you could also see it as HanaNene although they are not end game :// It's a real shame, the fic almost has 8,000 words to it, but I just have no motivation to continue.

I also have another WIP called Boundary Bound Nene-chan, but I only got a few paragraphs in and never touched it again :// The concept was pretty cool as well, Nene wakes up inside a mysterious place (later discovered to be a boundary) with no memories. She meets a boy named Tsukasa, who informs her she's dead, and together they try to find a way out. This was leaning very heavily into Yandere Hanako, which is usually right up my alley, but yeah again no motivation.

Last one I'll share is a Scaramouche fic, the temporary title was 5 times Scaramouche failed to be human and 1 time he didn’t. It's self-explanatory I think, but I started it before his backstory cutscene was revealed, and I lost confidence and motivation since what I was writing didn't match it at all. This one will 100% never be finished sadly.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Hmm, it's hard to say. I think I have good ideas and concepts, and I can keep the flow of the story moving at a decent pace. I also think I do well with character interaction? Maybe? Idk.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Descriptions. I am so so so bad at describing things, I think I find it hard to actually put myself into the scene, so I struggle to really get into the details of the environment and such. My paragraphs usually are on the smaller side, which I hate because I really want to immerse my readers.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

English is the only language I know and I do not trust Google Translate ^^;

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Technically speaking, it's Sonic The Hedgehog lmao, I wrote fics for that fandom in my very early teens on Fanfiction.net. No, I will never reveal my account or share what I wrote, I will actually die before I do that.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Hmm... Since the vamp au is unfinished, I will say it's chapter 21 of Red String of Fate. It is the only fic I have ever written and actively decided to go back and willingly read multiple times without dying of cringe... I just like it I suppose aha

Once again, thanks for the tag Krispy!! I'm not really sure who to tag, but I'll go for @milkteamoon @insipidenvy and @wingsonghalo. Obviously no pressure!! And anyone who reads this is free to join in ^_^

[emilykaldwen]

thanks so much for the tag @theladyelizabeth!

tagging: @acrossthesestars, @stannisfactions, @arrthurpendragon, @mercurygray, @alicentive, @nyctophilic0vitnir, @selfproclaimedunicorn, @themaradwrites, @lya-dustin, @dragonsoftheeast

1. How many works do you have on AO3?: I have 9 so far! I ended up deleting some old works that were abandoned and didn't have a lot of interaction that were over a decade old (and they didn't have bookmarks either so I wasn't worried)

3. What fandoms do you write for?: Currently, House of the Dragon is the hyperfixation

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

The Maiden and the Drowning Boy - HotD Canon Divergent

Soulmates Never Die - The Borgias (my oldest fic)

Fight For Me (If It's Not Too Late) - Teen Wolf

Boy With a Broken Soul (Heart With a Gaping Hole) - HotD Fae AU

You're the Lighting of the Blaze - Hotd Canon Divergent

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Always! (and if I don't it's legit cause I forgot/thought I did and AO3 ate the comment). I love the community aspect of fic writing so if you take the time to leave me a comment, I love to engage. I especially love it when commenters ask questions and look for discussion.

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? probably one of the old Prequel Star Wars Fics I wrote way back in the day.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Right now, it's a tie between You're the Lighting of the Blaze and Bright Star

8. Do you get hate on fics? Not on my fics directly but I have gotten some rancid hate in my inbox re: Abby (And then that escalated to telling me to end myself so). This is why I now have anons turned off. Sorry guys.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I do write smut! I'm not sure what it means by 'what kind'? I've done a few solo smut-shots, and Maiden will have a few explicit scenes when this arc is completed. I'm definitely someone who loves Plot with a side of Porn, and as long as the smut flows well and isn't overly repetitive, I'm here for it.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I have written a crossover! I had a mini-series of Whedon-verse/Supernatural called It Must Be Tuesday back on LiveJournal. Sam and Dean meet River Tam in a bar and the apocalypse happen. Dean and Buffy hooked up. I was acutally very proud of that LOL

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not stolen but I did have some concepts lifted from a Once Upon a Time fic

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Not that I'm aware of!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes! Soulmates Never Die was co-written with a friend at the time (we've lost touch since then), and then when I was in the Charmed fandom, I adopted out an abandoned fic of mine and was the beta/co-writer on a big future Fic series with Wyatt, Chris, and Chris' friends. Those were some fantastic stories.

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship? Oh man. I really love me Jacelaena and Helaemond still has a soft place in my heart (but the trajectory of a lot of the fics has just been... a turn off). Harry/Luna will always be warm and fuzzy for me (I used to be the ship captain back in the Fiction Alley days). Buffy/Angel was my first real Fandom OTP.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? Hmmm... I don't have anything right now that fits that. I did have Isabelle Martin's Life is Totally Over which was a Derek/Lydia future Kid fic that I was actually enjoying but the fandom was such an utter turn off by that point.

16. What are your writing strengths? God fuck if I know. I think I'm really good at tying things together/call backs and really emphasizing those themes. I like to think I'm thoughtful at cause/effect of character action and consequences. 

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I feel like my descriptions are lacking and I get lost in the weeds. I struggle with finding the stakes in a story. Conflict is difficult. 

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? me crying with dote on doing some appropriately translated high valyrian for Maiden instead of just copy/pasting from one of the online translators. Only very, very, VERY few people will know that they're grammatically correct and honoring the original development of HV, but it was important to ME.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Star Wars back in the late 90s.

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written? Maiden obviously holds my heart and soul, and it's always going to be everything for me, but I'm actually incredibly proud of Fight For Me (If It's Not Too Late). It was a two parter, and I wrote it in the span of a week? Maybe two weeks? and it was the last thing I wrote for a very long time.

[boydcrowdr]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you @acorrespondence, my lovely mutual and writting buddy, for tagging me <3

How many works do you have on ao3?

6, under beezleebub (more under a secret abandoned account)

What's your total ao3 word count?

131,144 for my current account

What fandoms do you write for?

justified, primarily. with one deadwood fic, and a mcu wip in the works.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

"stay with me" is my most kudoed fic <3

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

i try to! i never know what to say cus i'm always so blown away that anyone's reading my shit at all.

What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i try not to end on a sour note, but i feel like everything i write carries a general blanket of angst through it's narrative

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

probably "stay with me" just cus i was feeling nice that day

Do you get hate on fics?

not these days. i feel like ao3 users have a generally laid back approach to fanfic these days. don't like? exit the tab, easy peasy.

Do you write smut?

no? i have included not overly explicit sex scenes in fics bcus they can be a great tool for emotionally charged moments, good character moments, etc. but nothing crazy.

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

never ever. they're not really my thing.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

no lol

Have you ever had a fic translated?

nah

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no, i'm a control freak

What's your all-time favorite ship?

charles xavier/erik lehnsherr. easy. full stop. don't even have to think about it. there's something about them. something about the 60s/70s. something about two sides of the same coin. something about wanting the same thing but having morally conflicting approaches. i think about magneto every single day of my life since i was 11 years old. next question.

What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

"keep it near" had such a choke hold on me. it was born of an offhanded discussion in the justified discord so long ago and a love of southern gothics and detective stories. i still love it sm but idk if i'll ever have the steam to revisit it. maybe when i rewatched true detective s1 it'll just pour outta me tho, who knows.

What are your writing strengths?

dialogue. i think i'm pretty good at back and forths between two characters that are saying something other than what they mean. i enjoy writing dialogue that is more revealing in what isn't being said. p.g. wodehouse also taught me a lot about tone in dialogue and witty back and forths that i really enjoy and think i have a pretty good grasp on writing those sorts of exchanges.

i also like to think i'm pretty good at carrying a tone through a story. giving something a general vibe. usually a haunted angsty vibe but still, it's an energy.

What are your writing weaknesses?

probably so many things. i don't like most of my fics that are up currently (with the exception of "keep it near" and probably "stay with me"), but we're all our worst critics. I feel that i struggle with writing action, motion, etc. i never want a scene that lacks dialogue to come across as "and then," "and then," etc, you know what i mean?

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

iffy. i feel like it can come across as jarring to a reader if they have no idea what they're even looking at. i've included snippets of russian in a wip, which i have been studying for quite a while, but i still fear it might come across as clunky.

First fandom you wrote for?

uhhh... probably batman? or marvel? unless we're counting the self insert assassin's creed fanfic i wrote in 6th grade before i knew what fanfic was.

Favorite fic you've written?

oh probably "keep it near" but by far my unpublished fic i'm working on currently.

don't know who's been tagged yet, but @praycambrian @raylangivins @norgbelulah @eff41 and anyone else who hasn't been tagged yet <3

[crosbyism]

Fic Writers Q & A

tagged by @dadvans (like a fortnight ago, lol my bad bud, thank u boo)

How many wips do you have currently? like 9, and actively working on about two. fucking r i p, my writer’s block is absolutely taking me out back to the glue factory right now.

Which one are you finding the hardest to finish? Why do you think that is? I’ve been struggling with creative block for a while, so everything is hard right now. But for sure the ones that are hardest are the ones I’ve made the least progress on— where I love the idea and have written some scant words but maybe haven’t found the voice or the sticking points. It’s really important to me to find an emotional core while I’m writing. Sometimes that manifests as a certain atmospheric vibe given by the POV character’s emotional state bleeding into the narration (see nuts and bolts and the low tide), sometimes that’s a very concrete topic or discussion that the fic is centered around (like who can grow me), and sometimes it’s just about hitting the right narrative voice. In Pornstache and the Dogg, that sort of narrational style that’s (comedically) commenting on the events as if from after-the-fact (“It wouldn’t have happened the way it did…”; “And if it weren’t… then Nate would never ask…”; “That’s how Nate ends up…”)— I slid into that almost right away. Although it took quite a while, it was really smooth going from start to finish, and I think I even wrote it chronologically (which is unusual for me) because getting into the flow of that voice propelled me on really well. I think of it like a river: if the established current (=narrative voice, emotional core) is really strong, it’s a lot easier for me to just ride that current and let it take me where I need to go. So when I don’t have that, or am still trying to find it, that’s really hard. It’s why long-ish fic is really hard for me, because I’ll have an idea that I can plan out, that’s easy to sort of map plot points out for, but then the actual writing process is really hard because while I know what needs to happen, actually finding the voice for the story around it beomes a challenge. For me, doing it the other way around is much easier, because rearranging plot points or dialogue is very easy and natural for me if the groove of the narrative voice is well-established for me to slip into. It’s why I think of myself as more of an editor than a writer, because I find it a lot easier to rearrange my writing in order to get to a satisfying emotional ending— which is, to me, the whole point of writing.

What does it usually look like when inspiration strikes for you? It looks very random, haha. No rhyme or reason whatsoever, very mercurial lightning-in-a-bottle type shit, which makes it harder to capture. I do actually get boosted creatively a lot by spitballing with friends (most notably dadvans, who really lights my fuse like no one else), but other than that it’s unfortunately hard-to-plan, haha.

Do you curate playlists for each fic or is your process different? For a lot of fics, yeah, but not for every fic. what’s much more common is that I’ll curate either a ship playlist or a playlist for a certain mood or atmosphere, and it’ll get me in the right mindset to write e.g. a creepy scene; a sex scene; shenaniganery; etc. It’s all about mood-setting, for me.

Do you go balls to the wall and write as you go or are you more organized? I think of it as writing as I go like 90% of the time, but I don’t think that’s exactly true. It’s funny bc I always have certain beats I wanna hit for sure or plans that have evolved by midway through writing. That’s true for smut as much as for anything else. For smut it can be sex acts or sexually motor-revving moments for the characters (which, to me, is always emotionally significant), but mostly it’s an emotional beat. But it can work out to be structural elements too! For example for who can grow me I knew that the logical ending of the fic was the end of the weekend, and I’d already written and conceptualised the conversations that needed to happen within the fic/timespan of the weekend, so I ended up making a timeline midway through the process to more concretely figure out what conversation needed to happen when, so that it’s sort of “all ticked off the checklist” by the time they leave the cabin at the end of the fic. After scribbling down a timeline and planning it all out, it became clear that the last scene didn’t need to happen right before they left and that I didn’t need to make them leaving the cabin a part of the fic at all, since it was more important that it should happen the morning after The Big Emotional Talk. So I MacGyver’d it into the final scene happening on the second to last day, as they’re going out for a little hike. Because for the emotional beat, it was more important for Matthew to finally ask for something from his brother, trust him in that way, and for Brady to be able to give it to him, to sort of reforge the trust and emotional connection. So that ended up being a change made through logistical planning. What that did mean is that an easter egg that I planned fell through (Brady and Matthew were going to meet the mysterious owner of the cabin coming in as they’re going out, and sort of lift the minor mystery of who the cabin even belongs to), but since the emotional story was more important, it was a cut I was pretty happy to make.

tagging: @crosmack @imafriendlydalek @plethoriall bc i’m curious (no pressure tho buds ❤️) and anyone else who wants to. talking about this was actually really fun!