#I have a really thick and bushy happy trail despite the rest of the hair on my body being pretty light

[anonyanonymouse]

I want all the characters in TWST to have happy trails...

[ficsnroses]

Intimate - John Wick x Reader (nsfw A-Z headcanons)

Word Count : Way too many. (little under 5K...im so sorry guys you know I have a problem)

Warnings : Smut. Fluffs.

Summary : All about your sex life with John :)

A/N : Requested by a few lovely anons! Did I forget a letter? Let’s hope not. Are these even headcanons cuz they’re so long??? These were tricky, I’m sorry if they kinda suck, it took me a hot minute into last night to complete them. Enjoy! Feedback is always appreciated.🖤

A : Aftercare. (What he’s like after sex).

John has a heart of gold, despite his enthralling profession. Many think John can be stoic, cold, reserved, but you; you know John. After sex, John makes sure to keep you close, asking over and over to make sure you’re alright. He’d never hurt you, even if during the deed. For a moment, he rests his forehead against yours as you’ve both came together, eyes closed as he catches his breath, cock still buried deep in you. He relishes in the afterglow, your head on his chest as he holds you, bulky arms wrapped around your figure, every now and then he presses a kiss to your hair, sighing deep relief; contentment. Sometimes, you’ll lay there together, skin sticking from the heat, relaxing in the moment. John will pepper kisses over your temples, your cheeks, your hands, your wrists. Being quiet and reserved, it’s his way of letting you know how much he loves you, and how lucky he feels to be able to make love to you. Normally, he prefers being the big spoon after sex. But, he is human. Sometimes, he likes being held by you; finds it really cute when you try to wrap your much smaller limbs to his much larger body. If he’s been away for a while, he loves pillow talk, lost in the company of just him, and the woman he loves.

B : Body Part. (His favourite body part of yours).

John is a simple man. He adores each part of you, to him, you are the embodiment of perfect. If he had to choose, however, he loves your breasts. They provide a safe haven for him to nestle his head in during sex, especially if its missionary. When you’re on top, it turns him on immensely to see them bounce up and down, so full, so plump, swollen from pleasure. John loves hugging you from behind, whether it be in the morning in front of the washroom mirror as you’re just waking up, or as you’re getting dressed on the edge of your bed after some hot and passionate sex. Occasionally, he’ll trail his hands up, palms and fingers working your breasts, fondling, massaging as delicate kisses place themselves on your neck from his sultry lips. Of course, when he’s spoon fucking you, or has you bent over as he slams in from behind, he loves to reach forward and hold your breasts.

C : Cum.

John has a lot of cum, can you even be surprised though? You feel dirty admitting it, but you love his cum. It’s the most intimate form of him, and its reserved only for you. It’s quality seed as well; thick, succulent, creamy, perfectly glossed. It’s not a bad taste at all; a delicacy to your lips if you will. John has almost a primal need for his cum to be inside you when he finishes; he feels it where it belongs. Whether it be brimmed deep inside your cunt, or in your mouth after you’ve gone down on him. He’s never actually admitted it due to his slight shyness, but he loves when you swallow for him. Pulls his heart seams to know you love and trust him enough to do it. Part of the reason you’re on birth control is so he can come inside, you know how much he enjoys it, and how much he appreciates to feel all of you, without the barrier of a condom. The feeling, his orgasm hitting him as with the force of night to day, you tighten around him, feeling him spill inside you; it’s pure nirvana for him. Coming inside you makes him feel closer to you; something he always craves.

D : Dirty Secret.

John is away often, but that doesn’t mean your sex life dies for the time he’s away. John and you always want one another, crave each other. You take pictures for John often, some suggestive; his favourite black, lacy lingerie embellished on your satin skin, allowing little to his imagination, and some full and frontal nudes. You love to hear the way his breath hitches over the phone as you hit send, the way his raspy voice compliments you.

 “Beautiful, sweetheart. So beautiful,” his coarse, yet velvety voice whispers, hand pulling out his girthy cock, that has already started to throb for you, from thousands of miles away.

What you don’t know though – John keeps each and every picture of you in an album on his phone, locked away where no one can find it, but him. He only does it because he knows you wont mind, those pictures are all for him, and you best believe he’s going to savour each and every one for as long as he can. They come in handy when he’s away and needs you; he can’t get off to anything else since but the thought of your heavenly body. You assume they just disappear in conversation overtime, so you take more for him, constantly replenishing his feed ;)

E : Experience.

John is experienced, in the sense that he certainly knows what he’s doing. He hasn’t slept with many people, his work made it tough, his attention and focus constantly diverted to it. You’ve been with John for many years now, but he is on the older side still. John has had a few flings over the course of his life, however, they never really meant much. With the very few times he has been with someone, it was merely because he needed someone to give him sweet, sweet relief. But when he met you, it all changed. With you, his experience comes in handy, because he always puts your needs before his. He pays close attention to what you want, always making sure to communicate.

“Does that feel good, sweetheart?” His hand moves to securely hold yours, letting you know he’s listening. “Harder, baby?”

John can effortlessly bring you to multiple orgasms during a session. His sturdy fingers, his veiny cock, his suave mouth, he knows how to use each tool to the best of it’s ability, for you. Of course, he’s willing to try anything new for you as well. You want to try a new position? He’s on it. Want him to pay attention to a certain part of your body? He’s already there.

F : Favourite Position.

Definitely depends on the mood, but he is simple and doesn’t try to be too adventurous. Normally, John prefers good old missionary. He likes the intimacy, holding onto your hips with your arms wrapped around his neck, holding him close. His lips have easy access to litter slow, passionate kisses to your face, your neck, your chest as he pleases. However, John also appreciates a good ol riding as well from his baby, especially after a demanding job. During riding sessions, he indulges in you; being able to sit back and relax, your aching cunt bobbing up and down on him, your walls tightening around him, so perfectly soaked. The way he’s able to buck his hips up into you, to feel you deeper, the way he can hold you to his chest as you ride him, allowing him to speed up when he needs. 

The sounds you let out drive him insane. Did I mention, he loves watching himself slip in and out of you, the way your glistening releases coat his thighs, slicking his pulsing cock. Sometimes, he likes taking you from behind, he enjoys the gorgeous view of your peachy ass for him, and the way you whimper when his balls slap into your skin, the sounds so delicious filling his ears. Doggy style is also a close favourite of his, more for days when you both crave a good, rough fuck that’ll clear any trace of stress.

He enjoys a good against the wall fuck as well, in the shower is always nice. There have been a few times, he’s came home, neither of you able to control as he pins you against the wall, legs wrapped around his waist with his cock pounding you into oblivion.

G : Goofy. (Is he serious in the act or goofy?)

John isn’t too too goofy in the moment, but he can be on some days. Although he finds sex to be a very intimate, serious act, he can’t help but giggle at how adorable you can get during foreplay. You make him smile, laugh, feel loved, valued. You make him happy, and that comes out during sex as well. He sees you smile, and he’s gone. It’s his favourite thing in the world. If something happens in the moment, such as your face turning red from a particularly loud and explicit moan, he can’t help but smile, giggling with you.

On days when he’s tired and just needs to feel you, he can be a bit more serious. You don’t mind though; on days such as those, you focus your entire attention on making him feel good anyway, you know he deserves it. In turn, John tries incredibly hard to make you come as many times as possible on those days as well, it gives him relief and makes him feel better to know his lady is being treated well, leaving little room for giggles and laughs in those sessions.

H : Hair.

John used to not care before he met you, but now, he makes sure to keep himself tame and trimmed for you. The mans beard is always on fleek, you best believe the same follows down under. He does keep his hair; he’s never been one for being clean shaven. You love going down on him, tasting him in your mouth. He doesn’t want you to be uncomfortable, so he makes sure to keep clean for you. It is a bit bushy, but he’s consistent with grooming.

I : Intimacy.

Sex is John’s way of showing you how much he loves you, and how much you mean to him. John hasn’t been with many women; he’s never really had time for sex before you. But now, now that you’re together, in love, sex is what keeps your love fresh, alive, keeps you close and vulnerable with each other. He takes his time with you, making sure to appreciate each part of you, and the alter that is your body. He’s tender, gentle, he loves to feed your self confidence.

He loves kissing you during the act, lips smothering you as his cock slips in and out leisurely. While he’s thrusting is usually when his lips leak with praise for you, how good you feel, how much he loves you.

“Fuck, Y/N…” your name glides off his tongue, smooth as honey. “You…you feel amazing, sweetheart.” He whimpers, cock grinding your G spot each time he thrusts. “So good, baby.”

Even when he’s pounding into you, thrusts hasty, profound; he’ll still make sure to hold you tight, whether it be your hips or your hand. Anywhere from eye contact, to forehead touching, to the cuddle sessions after - John likes to let you know that he’s there with you in the moment; there for you, as he’ll always be.

Till his last breath.

J : Jack off.

Only when he’s away from you. When you’re together, he doesn’t need anything but you to make him feel good. But his work calls for it, and you know there’s times where you need to be away from him. Of course, he loves to have you on the phone for him as he sits in the Continental hotel room, a completed job behind. His palm sloppily wraps around his base, pumping slow, thumb swirling his tip as precum seeps out to the sound of your voice.

“Are you touching yourself, John?” You purr, your own hand trailing suggestively close to your heating center. A mere moan escapes his lips, the sound of your voice enough to make him feel bliss. Twitching, shuddering, he throbs in his hand, movements picking up as he strokes, base to shaft, to tip, pumping, with images of you clouding his mind.

“I want you to come for me, John. Let it out, baby. Let me hear you.” You encourage, hearing his moans, gasps and grunts over the much too distant phone line.

K : Kinks.

John is calm and collected, yet still a little shy. You adore that about him, the way his gentle personality shies away from fully letting you know what he wants sometimes. Over the course of your relationship however, you’ve learned some of his preferred kinks, and you love using them on him, on days you lounge together and have time to really get down and dirty.

Due to his profession, John takes control too much in other aspects of his life. In bed, on days where you want to focus on making him feel good, John relishes in being submissive. He loves to let you take control of him, allow you to do what you please with him. It makes him feel vulnerable, helps him feel human to be at your mercy. He loves you, trusts you enough to let you have him this way. He’s into light bondage, he likes having his wrists restrained, although nothing too insane. He is a simple man after all. Marking is a huge turn on for him, he loves leaving hickies on your silky skin, your collarbones, loves having them on him in turn. He loves body worship, appreciating each inch of you as he trails his kisses down your breasts, your chest, your stomach, slowly inching down to the ache between your legs.

Although John isn’t huge on praise kink, you do like the way he blushes ever so slightly when you tell him how good he’s making you feel.

“John…” You moan, fingernails digging into his back. “You’re fucking me so…” Whimpering, you whine softly in his ear. “So good, Jonathan…don’t stop baby, please…” He picks up pace, husky tone letting out small, soft moans as he slips in and out, fueled by your praise.

L : Location.

John and you have a mission; to have sex in each part of your home. Although his favourite is your bed, it’s safe, familiar, allows you both to be free and active as can. A close second is the couch, usually because the couch means you’re on top of him, spread on his thighs as he thrust up into you, hugging your body close. Hot seat position sex is easier on the couch as well. Anywhere in your house is John’s preferred place, in the comfort of where you live in peace together, the gateway to the dream that is your connection. He’s had you in the shower, in all the rooms, even on the hood of his car in your garage. 

The kitchen counter has been one of John’s favourites, assuming how often he has you whimpering for him on it. Fucking into you with your body propped on the counter? He’s a sucker for it. Being tall enough to reach your cunt standing, he props your leg against his torso and shoulder, holding it for support as your other wraps around his waist, watching himself glide in and out of you. it’s always rough on the kitchen counter, but you like it that way. He makes breakfast right after, returning the favour for letting him get one in before the start of the day. 

M : Motivation. (What gets him going?)

John is always turned on by you, you never have to try to get him to want you. Perhaps that’s just how deep you both are smitten with each other. He loves when you wear lingerie for him, it gets him tenting in his pants, his cock rising to the mere sight of you embroidered in lace for him. Lingerie shopping with John is always tricky due to it, he’ll have his hands roaming each crevice of your body in the dressing room, lips leaving delicate, quiet kisses along the skimpy lace adorned on your breasts. Of course, he’s no help in choosing a piece. Everything is perfect on you through his eyes.

He has a sensitive neck and ears, so he loves when you whisper for him, in your oh so sensual voice, smooth and sugary.

He loves celebrating with you after a successful contract. What better way to wind down than buried deep inside your cunt, warm, wet, as if perfectly moulded for him. Sometimes, that’s what gets him through work. Knowing that soon, he’ll be in your arms, where you’ll make him feel so, so good.

N : No. (What he won’t do)

John would never, ever hurt you, even if you asked. With all the violence, the murder that lies on his fingertips, he feels guilt. He tries not to, but he feels guilt. You love him endlessly, and you know he fears causing you even the smallest amount of pain during sex. If you wince a bit too loud, he’ll immediately pause and ask if you’re okay. Even if its simply the bulk of his sizable cock making you feel pain when he first enters, he gets concerned, always holding off until you’re adjusted to him, nodding when you’re ready for him to move.

You have a fantasy of John face fucking you, his twitching length jammed inside your throat, lapping as much as you can with your cheeks hallowed. You know it would be pure bliss for him, they way you’d choke on his cock for him, allowing him to savour each inch of your wet, warm, tight mouth. John is still a bit scared, however. He almost doesn’t trust himself; he fears he’ll hurt you.

You’ll get there someday, though. As long as you keep proving to him that you trust him.

More than anyone, anything else in the word.

O : Oral.

Oral is one of John’s favourite parts of sex. He loves going down on you, and love’s having you go down on him. John is crazy good at eating you out, he has had tons of practice with you. The way you moan for him, fingers tangling his hair turns him on like crazy, it’s addicting. The mere sound of you, writhing, whimpering as he laps your nectar, tongue expertly flicking your folds, your clit, hands graciously soothing your thighs, your breasts; he thrives off all of it. You love the sound of his mouth eating you out as well, the slicking, the smacking, the wetness of two of his stocky fingers pumping you, the way you know they’re the sounds of him making you feel good. He flattens his tongue, spreading your folds, alternating between the perfect symphony of fast and slow licks, making sure to dot a few kisses to your center through the process.

Head from John is a dream. A sweet, sweet, beautiful dream; only you have the pleasure to drift in.

P : Pace.

John is a master of pace, another attribute that comes in handy from his work. He knows exactly what pace to use for exactly the type of fuck you’re going for. During proper sex, where you both can take your time, he’ll always start off close and sensual as you get used to each other. His generous length is thick, heavy, and always needs time to get used to as mentioned. Slow at first allows him to focus his attention on kissing you passionately as he glides his dick in and out, feeling each other close. Gradually, he’s unable to hold himself back. Not when your pussy feels so heavenly around him. He’ll get faster and faster, until the bed frame is creaking and the wall behind is being pounded into-much like you. John has the power to shake your entire body with his thrusts, always keeping sure to hold you secure. Often, John leaves you aching for hours later, sometimes into the next day.

Q : Quickie.

A good quickie is always delightful for the both of you. You crave each other so much, that quickies inevitably find their way into your daily lives together as you coexist. In the morning as you’re just waking up? John never says no to a good ol quick morning fuck in your bed, your soft morning voice moans causing his heart to flutter. At breakfast on the kitchen table? John wasn’t able to resist when you wore just his oversized shirt and a pair of panties. Sometimes a good ol quickie before bed helps him sleep better, and you never deny him when he asks for one. John can have trouble sleeping sometimes, so sex before bed helps him relax, wind down, and most of all,

feel good. Something he deserves. 

R : Risk.

John is okay with taking risks, if you want to. He’s always looking for new ways to satisfy you in bed. If you want to try something new, he’ll always say yes for you. He trusts you, and you trust him, so experimenting can be nice sometimes. Sometimes, there have been instances where either he, or you don’t end up liking it, and it makes him a little upset. He doesn’t want to let you down.

You try out new positions all the time, the most recent being The Wheelbarrow. He loved it, the way your hands planted on the floor as he raised your hips to his cock, pounding, pelting into you from behind; your legs wrapped around him.

John likes thrill too, sometimes. He fantasizes about public sex, perhaps in the washroom of a restaurant or something, somewhere where the stakes are higher and you could get caught. He’d be extra cautious, of course. He’d never want to do anything to make you feel uncomfortable.

S : Stamina.

John can last decently long, long enough to make you cum. If it’s been a few weeks away from each other, and you haven’t been able to have sex in a while, his stamina increases and he can go for more rounds. There have been times where you’ve had to tap out on him as well, but he’s alright with it. He respects you way too much to make you give him sex when you don’t want to. On average, John can go for 2 rounds if you want him to, although most of the time, one is enough. John is the embodiment of quality over quantity; he fucks you so good, so well the first round, that you’re too sore for another, you’ve been completely satisfied.

“You got another one in you for me, princess?” John chuckles, your breathless body under him, coming down from your high with him still nestled between your legs. You look at him in disbelief almost, wincing when he removes his cock out of you, collapsing on the bed beside.

“Another one already?” You breath, running a hand over your sweaty forehead.

He softly smiles, leaning over to kiss your shoulder, his hand moving to lightly rub a few circles to your clit, building your anticipation again. “Give me a few minutes, sweetheart, I’m not done with you just yet.”

T : Toys.

He has no problem incorporating toys into the bedroom. Neither of you need them, but they do add some spice to your sex life. John isn’t too much of a tech guy, but he did spend hours on his laptop searching up the best vibrators to try out for you. John gets off seeing you get off, and pleasing you. Sometimes, he’ll use the vibrator on you before sex, allowing you to delve into oblivion. On nights when he’s away, he loves when you send him pictures of you using it on yourself; his cock wheezes to the sight of your dripping cunt at the mercy of a vibrator, knowing it makes you feel no where near as good as he does when he’s home. John is willing to try out more toys, and he’s open to the idea of you buying some for him as well. You mentioned a vibrating cock ring to him; (not that he needs it for the extra support), but more for the pleasure the vibrations could give to your sensitive nub and his balls when he’s fucking you. There’s a lot you want to explore with John, you want to find out what he’s into, what he may be fond of. He’s a tricky man to get a feel of since he’s always so focused on you.

U : Unfair.

“John…John please..” You wail, feeling him sink just his tip into you, before pulling back out, teasing. He smirks slightly, placing a kiss to the corner of your mouth, teasing to not even give you a proper kiss when all you want is for him to fuck you senseless. His fingers rub small circles to your clit, eliciting deep moans, yet he makes sure to keep them slow, light, enough to let you feel him on you, but not enough to let you feel relief.

You love edging each other, love building up each other’s orgasm to maximum potential. When you’re on top, you’ll halt movement, your hands planted to his chest as his palms hold your hips tight. He’s always panting under you, biting his lip with breathy moans falling as you start to move again.

He’ll tease you when he’s going down on you as well, leaving kisses to the insides of your thighs, close to your heat. You totally get him back, though, the way you wear very revealing shorts around the house the next day, making sure to bend over a little further when you reach down to pick a towel off the floor.

V : Volume. (Is he loud?)

You both can be loud, depending on the type of sex. If it’s just a quickie before bed, you both tend to stay a little quieter, reverting to small whispers of praise, soft, gentle moans into each other’s necks and ears. John’s voice is smooth, buttery, fine as velvet when he’s trying to be quiet, it makes your pussy quite literally tremble knowing you’re the reason those delicious, delightful sounds are leaving his lips.

When you’re having a proper, longer session of sex however, you both tend to get slightly louder than you mean to. You live alone together, in a reserved neighbourhood. John’s grunts and groans can get excessive when you clench around him, your screams of his name flood the bedroom walls when he’s expertly working you. Sometimes, with John, its far too difficult to hold back your cries and sobs, his balls slapping your core to his demanding pace, his breath tantalizing on your skin. Perfectly, he hits your sensitive nerve endings each time, your eyes fill with tears at how well he’s fucking you, loud gasps to each buck of his hips.

W : Wildcard. (Random headcanon).

John has needs – he has to masturbate when he’s away from you, but only to the thought of you, and the nudes you send him. They’re marvellous, but he wants more. John wants to record you having sex at least once for when he’s away. He misses you dearly, although the lonesome comfort of his stocky palm, coated with the blend of shea hand cream he carries with him show no comparison to your soaking cunt. A video of you unravelling for him will definitely elevate his lonely nights spent away from you in the hotel walls. He would never do it without your consent, so he’s made a mental note to ask you next time you get intimate. Phone sex with you is nice, and it gets home going so well. But the thought of the real deal, a video in which your moans can be heard, your beautiful pussy on display for him, would be divine.

X : Xray. (What’s going on in the pants)

John has a very generous load to offer. His cock is quite literally- fucking gorgeous. When you first saw it, your breath hitched. He’s above average, makes you swallow in anticipation when he’s fully erect for you. He has the perfect amount of girth, a few striking veins running down his shaft, and a very slight curve. His tip shows a blushy, rosy shade of dusty pink, and you can’t help but elicit a moan when droplets of his gleaming pre cum glide down the length of his cock, almost as if a delicacy made just for you to devour. John’s cock is the only to ever had made you feel completely full, completely fulfilled. Struck gold? Definitely.

In more ways than just one.

Y : Yearning.

John has a pretty high sex drive. He’ll never deny you, that’s for sure. You almost never deny him either, whether it’s when he’s tossing and turning in the middle of the night and you offer him a quick session to calm his nerves, or whether it’s in the middle of the day, when he craves to feel your body close. John would like to have sex every single day of the week, but he knows that’s not always what you want, and he respects that. You settle for 4-5 times a week, right in the middle so his needs are taken care of. Sometimes, when you’re not in the mood for sex, you’ll give him a blowjob because you want him to feel good.

That’s your man, and you know how to take care of him.

Although he would like to have sex everyday, he doesn’t ever resort to masturbating unless he’s away. If you’re there, he wants it from you, or not at all. He’d rather wait for you than whip one out alone, without the feel of your body to compliment it.

Z : Zzzz. (How quickly he falls asleep after).

John and you both need a good round of cuddling, just holding each other after sex to doze off. A good cuddle session is part of sex for you; it’s part of the aftercare, part of the intimacy. Value is so important in a relationship, and holding each other, even if it’s just him holding onto your hand on his chest as you lie in comfortable silence, coming down from your highs; it all allows you both to feel valued, appreciated. You both share a little bit of pillow talk, and get cleaned up before you can actually fall asleep. John is a well organized, clean man. He helps you wipe down, change, shower, whatever you need to do before you both retire to bed, your skin freshly peppered with the scent of the eucalyptus shower gel you always buy. He can fall asleep pretty quickly after that, nice and relaxed, gratified and content with the love of his life tucked securely in his arms. He loves it when you hold him and use his chest as a pillow, takes him out like a light to know you’re safe there with him. The clothes you ripped off each other before sex are still scattered on the floor.

“John?” You quietly whisper, arms wrapped around his core, his biceps holding you close to his chest. He stirs slightly, half dozed off already.

“Hmm?” He murmurs, ever so slightly, eyes closed with his heartbeat steady against your ear.

Giggling, you softly plant a gentle kiss to his chest, allowing your head back to rest on him. “Goodnight, I love you.” You whisper into the quiet of the night, sure he’d already drifted to dreamland. He doesn’t reply, until a few seconds later, his deep voice drifting,

in and out of consciousness.

“Love you too, sweetheart.”

➶ ➴➶ ➴➶ ➴➶ ➴➶ ➴➶ ➴➶ ➴➶ ➴➶ ➴➶ ➴➶ ➴➶ ➴

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[softestseraph]

Kitten [castiel]

This is my submission for @casbabydontgoineedyou‘s 1K challenge. Congrats on the accomplishment Katie, and I hope you enjoy :)

Prompt: #16 - “If cops show up, I don’t know you.”

Warnings: language(like, 3 words), adorable kittens and angels… thievery? weird condoms and mentions of sex, but very brief

A/N: Look, this was supposed to be a cute, funny little fic involving shenanigans at the store, but at some point i got really mushy, and at another point my jedi-cat compelled me to include him in the fic. It’s kind of a mess, but so is my life. Enjoy anyway :)

Word Count: 2,219

You shuffle into the kitchen, the sight of your half naked boyfriend leaning over a cereal bowl greeting you. Your eyebrows furrow. “Where’s the boys?” You ask Castiel, peeking around the corner into the hall. “They never skip breakfast.” You turn to the fridge and grab some milk while you wait for an answer. When silence greets you, you turn around to see why the ex-seraph is being so quiet, only to catch him sitting with a spoon halfway to his mouth, eyes fixed on your ass. “Cas,” you coo sarcastically, drawing his name out with a smirk spreading across your lips. Your blue-eyed lover snaps from his daze, shoving the spoon into his mouth as his cheeks flush and he avoids eye contact. You chuckle, amused by Castiel’s embarrassment. Despite being together nearly two years–both of which were filled to the brim with sex of all kinds–he still acts like a kid caught with their hand in the cookie jar sometimes.

“They’re in Iowa hunting a tulpa,” Castiel mumbles from around his mouthful of food. You hum in reply, occupied with fixing yourself breakfast. “Dean said they’ll be back in three days.”

You sit by Castiel, reflecting his happy smile when you place your feet in his lap and grab one of his hands. “Well, what do you wanna do?” You ask. “We’ve got three days of free time…” you trail off suggestively, wiggling your eyebrows and sending Cas an exaggerated wink.

To your surprise, Castiel ignores the innuendo (and suggestion). Instead he pulls out a crumbled piece of paper from the pocket of his sweatpants–the ones that hang just right, so you can always see those glorious hipbones and his cute tummy freckles. “We can go grocery shopping. Sam left a list.” You blink once, twice, thrice. Grocery shopping? Castiel chooses to go grocery shopping, over lazing about? Over sex?

“Okay, sure,” You say after a second-too-long of silence. “We’ll go in an hour,” you add, standing up. Castiel beams and you melt. Fuck him with his perfect face and his fucking amazing self. He nods enthusiastically and shoves the last spoonful of Cheerios in his mouth, grabbing your dishes and rushing to the sink. You thank him, wrapping your arms around his waist from behind where he stands at the sink, and press a kiss to his shoulder. “I’m going to go shower, join me when you’re done,” you say before turning to leave. Castiel mumbles something in reply, but through the food it’s barely understandable.

You point towards the carts and Castiel dashes off, pulling a basket from the stack. After the two of you showered together–without sex, because shower sex is a tricky maneuver that takes longer than half an hour to pull off–you’d dressed and driven to the nearest convenience store. “Okay,” you start as Castiel appears back at your side. His eyes are roving over the store, finding pleasure in the brightly colored little Easter decorations scattered about. As a human, he’s found more time to just enjoy life and all it’s tiny little joys. Especially when he’s around you. He enjoys the way your eyelashes rest so delicately on your cheeks when you sleep, the way your hair flutters with every move you make, the gentle blush that glows on your face when you’re embarrassed, the way you gaze at him as if he is the most amazing thing you’ve ever stumbled upon. As an angel, Castiel hadn’t truly known love, he’d never felt it, nor been shown it. It was as foreign as freedom. He was told that his ‘family’ loved him, told that he had freedom, but it was all a facade. Until the Winchesters, he’d never really known freedom, and until you, he’d never really known love.

“Babe?” You repeat, waving a hand in Castiel’s face. He blinks, pulling his mind away from his thoughts and focusing on you. “You okay?” You ask, lips quirked and a small laugh escaping. “Get lost in La-La Land?”

“No, I was here,” Castiel replies, head adorably cocked in confusion. “I can no longer fly, remember?” He continues. Worry etches into the lines of his face and he rests a palm on your forehead, checking for a fever. “Are you sick, [Y/N]?”

You laugh and brush his hand away. “No, honey, it’s an expression.” At Castiel’s dubious look, you insists, “I’m fine, Cas, really.” You press a quick kiss to his lips as if to prove the point and draw his attention to the list. “Looks like we need paper towels.” You look up at Castiel, batting your eyelashes dramatically and holding an arm out. “Shall we, my love?”

Castiel, instead of hooking your arm with his, wraps his hand around yours and says, “Only if you’re sure you’re okay.” You nod, resting your head on his arm for a second before intertwining your fingers with his and leading Castiel toward the proper aisle. The two of you make your way down the fairly small list. Beer, bread, beef, pie, kale, chili… Castiel asks questions at every moment, his curiosity never waning, if you pass a stand of apples, he spews some random fact about apples, or if he spots a peculiar chip flavor, he places it in the cart. You answer his questions patiently, used to the newly-human-Castiel’s nature, and show interest in the randoms facts he’s collected from eons of life. When he places random items in the basket you wait until he’s distracted by something new and place it back on the shelf. In many ways, it’s akin to taking a child shopping.

You’re just about ready to check out, but you need to grab some more tampons real quick. You sigh upon seeing the rows of various boxes of tampons and pads, knowing that it is going to be a tedious search to find your specific brand and type. While you survey the options, Castiel wanders down the aisle a bit to where the sex accessories are. When you notice the silence, you turn to look for your blue-eyed boyfriend, only to see him standing by the condoms and lube. Uh oh. You walk over, trying to seem nonchalant to the couple other patrons perusing the self-care shelves. That all goes in the gutter when Castiel asks, loudly, I might add, “[Y/N], I don’t understand this. What is the necessity of size-enhancing, ribbed condoms?” He draws the attention of the nearby shoppers, and you rush over.

“Cas. put those back, please,” you beg, glancing around the two of you. “They’re just for added sensations when people have sex, it’s nothing.” You carefully pull the box from his hands, putting it back where it belongs.

“Would you like added sensations?” Castiel asks innocently, eyes flicking from a box of glow-in-the-dark condoms to your face. His query is, yet again, rather loud, drawing the attention of a mother and her teenage daughter picking out pads. The woman shoots you a glare, and the girl simply looks on in curiosity.

“No, Cas, normal condoms are fine,” you say, grabbing Castiel’s arm and pulling him away. “Let’s go, yeah?” You pose it as a question, but it’s really a demand. “We’re done in this aisle.” When you get away from that situation, you stop. “Okay, we just need to check out, and we’re done,” you announce, searching for the shortest line.

“This one,” Castiel says, pointing to a line that’s moving quickly. The two of you join the queue. Ten minutes later and you’re leaving the store, each of you carrying two bags. Your gaze is fixed on your gorgeous 1966 Chevelle when Castiel gets sidetracked. You come to a stop and turn around to see the once-seraph practically pressing his face against the glass of a pet-store window. You take the couple steps to join him and peek through the glass. Inside you see a single tuxedo kitten sitting there staring up at you. His wide green eyes and patch of white on his chin portray an expression of jaw-dropped awe, and the tip of his bushy tail flicks around excitedly. “Can we go in?” Castiel asks after a minute. You nod, completely entranced by the kitten and follow Castiel in. Both of you round the entrance and approach the little pen the kitty sits in. He meows when you get close, standing up on his stubby little legs and putting his paws on the wall, peering up at you. As if by Jedi mind power–something that cats seem to innately have–you and Castiel are impelled to crouch down and reach in to pet him. He purrs loudly as you run your fingers through his thick fur, Castiel scratching at his chin.

“Oh. My. God,” you whisper, utterly in love with this sweetheart of a cat. “Fuck, babe, I don’t think I can resist him,” you add. Castiel hums in agreement, both of you absorbed in petting the little creature. “I want him. Cas, can we have him? Please?” You plead, turning your gaze to Castiel. He looks at you wide eyed and shrugs. “Shit, wait, no. We don’t have the cash, and I didn’t bring any cards.” You frown.

“Perhaps we can come back,” Castiel says, disappointment lacing his tone as he casts his eyes back to the kitten. “Or maybe there is another way,” he adds after a bit, piercing blue eyes sending you a look. You squint, catching his gist, mind whirring.

Scanning the store for customers and employees, you turn to Castiel. “Grab him and go,” you hiss, pulling the grocery bags from his grip and standing. Castiel jumps into action immediately, carefully wrapping his hands around the tiny kitten and clutching him to his chest. You stand, moving for the entrance. Castiel follows closely, and the two of you dash out the door just as an employee catches you and shouts in annoyance. “Go, go!” You take off in a sprint.

The employee apparently grabbed his manager and coworkers, because now there are three prepubescent boys and a middle aged man on your tail. They yell at you to, “Come back with that cat!” You only run faster, panting. This was so a bad idea. Dammit, what the hell were you thinking? You glance over to Castiel, face painted with affliction. The middle-aged manager stops running, instead pulling out a phone. He dials something and brings it to his ear. Fuck.

“If cops show up, I don’t know you,” you grumble to Castiel, casting a furtive glance over your shoulder. Castiel rolls his impossibly-blue eyes in reply, shooting you a dubious glare. You put your hands up in surrender. “Look, babe, I didn’t get us into this situation,” you defend yourself. “You’re the one that said we needed to go grocery shopping.” You pick up your pace, the sleek cherry red of your car becoming clearer.

Castiel scoffs, fixing you with an incredulous look, despite the fact that the two of you are currently sprinting away from a pet store. “You’re the one who told me to grab him and go,” Castiel rebuts, looking down into his arms where the all tuxedo cat sits, unfazed, blinking up at the sky in wonder.

“But you gave me the idea in the first place!” You insist, the humor of the situation not lost on you. An ex-angel and a hunter sprinting away from a pet store with groceries and a stolen kitten in tow must be quite the image. “Shit, my keys are in my pocket,” you wheeze. Castiel immediately reaches over and pulls them out. He fumbles with them, trying to figure out how to work the fancy new fob you’d gotten. “Hurry, hurry.” You’re close to your destination now. Castiel unlocks the doors. You swing the driver door open, clambering in and haphazardly throwing the groceries in the backseat. You start the engine and Castiel climbs in just as you begin pulling away. You peel out of the parking lot right in time for the pet-store workers to reach your previous parking spot. It’s quiet for a minute while you put some distance between the two of you and the store. “Fuck,” you laugh out, gaze darting to Castiel. He beams widely at you, teeth glinting and eyes squinting as he laughs freely. That’s another thing about being human, he’s laughed more in the past month than he had in the previous eons of existence.

You pull over into a parking lot when you feel you’re in the safe, and throw the car in park. “We now own a cat,” you say, reaching over to pet the fluffy ball of purring love that Castiel holds in his lap.

“Yes, we do,” Castiel confirms. He smiles happily down at the cat before fixing you with an affectionate look. “We’re parents.” You laugh and nod, leaning across to peck his pink lips. He reciprocates before pulling away and fixing you with a serious expression. “We should name him Jack.” At your inquiring look he continues, “Dean introduced me to the Pirates of the Caribbean.” Castiel blushes lightly and you snicker, thinking of the scene where Jack Sparrow–sorry, Captain Jack Sparrow–ran across the beach, feeling as if your experience was very similar.

“Jack, I like that,” you say, rubbing Jack’s ears. “Now, time to go shopping for cat things.”