#I have a deadline to work on!!! I can't even be yapping rn!!!!
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Hate the duality of wanting to be #healthy about my interactions when the second someone doesn't reply RSD kicks me in the face
#origpost#adhd#rejection sensitive dysphoria#like I'm 100% certain this person likes talking to me we've been yapping for days??#why would they suddenly hate me after I reply to their 4 long-ass messages with similarly long messages like we've been doing the whole time#brain pls stop spouting nonsense#just bc someone replies in a server doesn't mean they aren't ever gonna reply to your dms chill tf out#I have a deadline to work on!!! I can't even be yapping rn!!!!
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Experimental post: Lunar Return chart observations (complete!)
My lunar return chart is quite interesting this month, so I wanted to do a little run down on my blog. I wanted to try out an experimental post. Let's review together after this cycle ends! See how accurate I got it the first time around. [ It's been a month & I've now passed this LRC. The result of the observation will be added below the initial points]
₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑
₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑
🍰 Leo rising (17° leo)
It's giving It girl lol! I'll be turning a lot of heads this month. Likely for the way that I dress or groom myself. Perhaps I'll be charming a lot of pants off (then put them back on because I'm in no position to be getting freaky rn)
[ Result; I received so many compliments this month, both online & offline. Most of them complimented my aesthetics & face. A lot of people were very sweet & kind to me as well. ]
🍰 Virgo 2nd House, lilith libra (12° pisces)
I'm going to be rather diligent with my money this month because of a splurge I did with my wallet the month prior... Haha.. natal Moon in 2nd house go brr
[Result; I.. definitely splurged lol. I spent most of my money buying things online. Usually, Lilith here (especially w the degree) means loans or debts & even scams. I got scammed out of one item that I bought but I got refunded because I had evidence. & I did loan some money to purchase stuff that I needed but I paid them back after.]
🍰 Libra 3rd House, Mercury (6° virgo), Eros (13° aries)
Looks like I'll be taking & writing quite a lot this month. I'll be a little bit rushed but still have to be careful. Also, teamwork is important here. Makes sense, with group work assignments & deadlines we have to catch.
[Result; definitely a lot of writing. A lot of last minute changes had to be done because of a miscommunication w a lecturer. I'll elaborate on this part later]
🍰 Juno (24° pisces) conjunct Sun (24° pisces)
Op— a potential romantic interest? Even if it is in the 3rd house (communication), I feel like it's rather spiritual or internal because of Libra & Pisces. Could also be someone admiring me from afar or online? Juno also trines Jupiter in the 11th house. Perhaps I'll just be yapping about my husband again online. Or he could be searching for me online? Hmm. Don't tell me my fs will find my blog, that doesn't make any sense to me ʕ º ᴥ ºʔ! Even if he does, he'll probably keep it a secret even from me since, he himself will be skeptical lol :p. Perhaps he found me by Googling himself (his chart placements). Although.. I don't know if my blog will show up yet since it's still relatively "new" so I bet it's still hard to find if you aren't an avid Tumblr user.
[Result; I can't say for sure on this part but I have dreamt about him twice albeit rather vaguely. I don't think it's anything important though. ]
₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑
₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑
When compared to my natal chart, it's more like receiving more admirers or even rivals ʕ´• ᴥ•̥`ʔ. This month is self focused (leo rising & lrc saturn in the 1st house) My natal union conjuncts lrc Sun & Juno but because of the degree (24° pisces) & the 8th house influence, it's giving secret admirer. Perhaps I'll get a few new stalkers as well TT.
[Result; I definitely caught a few new eyes lol. Though, it's more of a casual interest than much else. Again, I can't tell for sure what type of attention I'm getting from them since it's being hidden from me (8th house & pisces) ]
🍰 Sun opposite moon in 9th house
There still could be fatigue that follows throughout the month. Perhaps what I want to do doesn't line up perfectly with how I want things to be executed. Either that or I could be having slight issues with my assignments. As in, it's not going to be as great or effortless as I hope it would be (Libra vs Aries).
[Result; fatigue was definitely there, however I didn't feel it hit as hard as the month prior. I could still somewhat function & be in the moment. I could just feel a burnout coming lol. ]
🍰 Scorpio 4th House,
I'll be a bit sentimental about my family. Perhaps there will be some disagreements between me and my mother, either that or I'll feel a closer bond to her. They're pretty far away from where I am right now, so it could just mean being quite attached to them energetically. I wonder if I'll experience some paranormal activity since pisces is in the 8th house here.
🍰 Venus (29° leo) in Scorpio
Yeah, the relationship with my family & close circle will likely deepen here. No fighting, just bonding. My friends & housemates could feel more comfortable around each other. We could be going out & doing a lot of fun activities together as a group. Especially with the 5th house being Sagittarius.
[Result; There was some miscommunication with my housemates but it's nothing big i.e didn't involve actual arguments or anything. It actually made us feel more comfortable with each other after opening up. Also, I've been invited to do a lot of activities w different groups. I went to the city central w my housemates, went hiking w church members & slept over for a game night w them as well. Overall, I was very socially active this month. ]
🍰 Capricorn 6th House, Pluto (29° leo)
I'll be very focused on my health & duties this month. My schedule is packed, but it doesn't look like I'll suffer from it. Actually, it looks like I'll be having a lot of fun with it. I've also been.. taking a lot of health supplements lately, is that related? Probably.
[Result; I got a little sick but it didn't really affect my work much. I took on a lot of new responsibilities. Being a part of a leadership role, & actually being a leader. I had to work w things I wasn't used to but still managed to organise well. ]
₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑
🍰 Pluto trine uranus (26° taurus) in the 10th House
I was planning on doing something special for my blog. Let's call it a little upgrade. I just wanted to further integrate my personal style into my blog since it feels like an attachment to my identity. I'm working on a set mood my blog should give with every post. Since I have strong Scorpio & Pisces placements, I thought I'd have a dark, ethereal yet still romantic feel. Hoho? Seems like the 'rebrand' will be quite successful! Perhaps I'll be trying something new too. My housemates are quite active on TikTok so I'll probably be going on their lives here and there.
[ Result; I landed a position in a club/organisation I applied to, it just wasn't the one I applied for /went to interview for. It's a finance & business role, something I've never handled before in a more hands-on way. Still it's quite exciting. It requires me to think outside of the box i.e creatively]
🍰 POF (13° aries) in aquarius
Looks like I'll be quite fortunate with my work & studies, but also my online presence i.e blog. Does this mean I'll be some sort of trailblazer? With both Aries & Aquarius being standout placements perhaps I'll be the first at something. I just can't put my finger on it yet. Even if I'm in a rush, I'll still be able to do a decent job.
[ Result; I had to wrack my brain in a multitude of ways this month. Thinking of new & exciting ideas but also creating presentation slides (designing them from scratch all on my own). I'd say I did a pretty good job on all of the ones I designed for my team(s)]
🍰 Aquarius (17° leo) 7th House
I'll be working with a lot of different people this month. Makes sense with different groups in different classes.. with different assignments... TT. Looks like it'll run smoothly though. I'd like to thank them in advance for their cooperation!
[Result; I did work w a lot of different people. However, unconsciously I became the head of ideas for my groups i.w the one scripting & brainstorming the work structure for everyone.]
🍰 Fama (29° leo), Starr (22° capricorn) & Europa (26° taurus) in the 7th house
Ooh I guess I will be charming some pants off lmao. Okay Mid October - Mid November me, work. Perhaps a lot of people will invite me into their group or to hang out? Perhaps my involvement in these groups will be quite beneficial for my status? Or just getting more friends in general. Also, I'll likely gain attention for my work (posts) online as well. I could be working with people I adore for example. Or other blogs ? Sounds like fun!
When compared to my natal chart, all of these asteroids are in my 12th house so these collaborations may happen on social media (not physical).
[Result; I interacted with a lot of my mutuals (on Tumblr) this month (most of which I still can't believe are my mutuals because I love their post sm! It feels surreal lol). Also, a lot of the work I did for my group work were listed & shared online]
🍰 Saturn (13° aries) retrograde in Pisces 7th House
I could be reunited with old childhood friends, I feel like this is especially so since it's also aspecting Jupiter (21° Sagittarius) retrograde in the 11th House (Gemini). However, it's squaring Jupiter so even if we reconcile it's just for a brief moment since we'll be quite busy with other stuff.
[Result; Instead of old friends, I think this correlates to a certain ask I got about my FS ರ_ರ iykyk, though I did meet a lot of new acquaintances throughout the month. We won't be seeing each other often, but still keep in touch]
🍰 Saturn also trines groom in the 11th House
..the FS theory may still have legs to stand on. Although I'm not going to pay much mind to it yet.
[Result; again, not really sure. Though I think I did yap about my FS]
🍰 Neptune is aspecting a lot of my planets here,
so there could be this dreamy or idealistic influence with everything I do. Or, there could be a delay in my actions since mars is also in the 12th house. I might be taking the backseat in a lot of activities i.e not leading anything. I could also be doing some things alone. I could also be romanticising things often.
[Result; I think I was half awake for every activity this month lmao, mars in the 12th house manifested as me doing a lot of things alone i.e leading, planning, coming up w things. Though I don't feel like it was a burden. I know almost everyone here is still burned out & overwhelmed. So I made use of my brain as much as I could before it fully hit me too. ]
🍰 Priapus (18° virgo) 8th House conjunct Chiron (21° sagittarius) in the 9th House
Yeah, assignments will be quite tiring TT. Very tiring actually. It could also mean there's going to be a rather uncomfortable interaction within my course mates. Or with professors? They could shame me for my work or I might have to re-do something TT. I'm not looking forward to this. Someone I work with might have ill intentions towards me too.
When compared to my natal chart, my lunar return Priapus & Chiron are in my 2nd house so that bad energy could come from jealousy from my course mates for how I dress or what I have on me. They might think I look 'extra' TT.
[Result; Hah .. I was right. Though, rather than shamed I was cut off by an international lecturer. I did the planning & task division for my group members & we were supposed to update him on our progress but before I could even finish the first sentence — he cut me off & changed the whole direction of our work. Then he kept adding new last minute tasks that differ far from what he first issued. Omg. This was not fun. I was right but at what cost? ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ]
🍰 Gemini 11th House, Jupiter (21° Sagittarius) retrograde
I'll be gaining more friends, being more social & extroverted in general. Most of the new connections I'll be making are with people from a different state or even online. Perhaps it's in retrograde since I moved here about a month ago now so it's not completely "new" to me. But still, I'll be interacting with people from different states & even countries. I forgot, but one of my classes is involved in an online outbound program with students from another country. So, that could be it? Online friends, delayed, studies. We aren't meeting them physically although we will be sharing some lectures together with them. As you can tell, I'll be studying a lot TT. However it also means I'll be posting more on my blog (I think that's already started, compared to last month).
[Result; so the "outbound" program was canceled. A lot of group work had to be postponed, there were just a lot of things coming at once. I've also made a lot of drafts this month, though most of them are either half way done or ⅓.
It just requires more time & effort from my half since I need to shift a lot of my focus on my studies & actual life outside of the blog. Still, I'm very happy w my ideas & what I wrote. I've also gotten the most asks & messages this month but a lot of the questions required too much of my time (the dm questions mostly).
Still, I believe I have answered to the best to my ability i.e what I can manage right now. I'm really sorry, but most of the time I'm not going to be able to get to those really long & complex asks especially when it's from dms since it involves a lot of back & forth one on one teaching.
It would be great if they weren't novices but most of those asking me are beginners. So I usually find myself explaining from A to Z. I do what I can, but I just don't have that much time on my hands.
Also, please refrain from dming me about your questions. I'm sorry if it sounds harsh, but I'm not in the position to help you understand the whole meaning of your chart. I don't have the time to do paid readings at the moment, let alone guide you step by step because it takes a lot of time. I want to share what I know but please don't bombard me with so much to digest at once.
If you're truly curious about something, try it out first. Experiment with it. Refer to different sites & references. That is what learning is. That's also how I learned what I know today. If you find that it differs from what you're experiencing, then ask me THROUGH THE ASKS BOX ONLY since this will be my priority i.e what I'll be answering first. ]
🍰 Groom (8°scorpio) in Cancer 11th House
I could be feeling pretty attached to my FS. Whether energetically or emotionally. Perhaps I'll be writing about more of his personal details. Which is .. very likely. I don't want to get emotional over him anymore TT, high vibrations. High vibrations.
[Result; hah. Iykyk.]
Thus ends this experiment.
₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑
₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑
I know it seems like I'm talking about myself a lot lol, but it's my way of deciphering how certain things work especially when it comes to aspects I don't understand. Thus why I call this an "experimental" post. What's a better way to learn than from first hand experience? ʕ´•ᴥ•`ʔ
Thanks for reading ♡
@northopalshore
@northopalshore experimental lrc 2024.
#experimental#astrology observations#astrology notes#astrology blog#astro notes#astro observations#astrology content#astrology#astrology community#astrology ramblings#lunar return chart#lunar return notes#lunar return observations
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are you still working on the flowers under scalpel dottore series? Love ur work btw <3
tl;dr if u dont want to listen to me yap: yes! im still working on it!! i promise i didn't abandon it, timing has just been. super bad. i should post a new chapter late july at the earliest :)
.........and if you do want to listen to me yap here's whatsup
i started the fic at the start of the year, then i had to lock in to work on my portfolio, then i had little to no motivation to write, then i got a job, then i started working on 3 cosplays from (almost) scratch, then i couldn't bring myself to write because i'm stuck on how to develop the story without fucking up the pacing. and also other personal issues came up regarding my health and whatever. so like. lmao?? m trying to juggle everything but its haaaard and i also have an animated project m working on and the deadline is soon so i cant slack off too much and uuoououghohoghhghhhh.....
ive been putting it off too bc writing isnt my priority rn but i want to develop the story sauuuurr bad u dont even know nonnie (´ཀ`」 ∠) i have notes in some random notebook in my room, stuff in my notes on my phone n i have a word doc with worldbuilding elements n whatever...... im working on it i just can't write the actual chapters rn ive been so busy aah
#if im taking a break im lying in bed with an immense feeling of guilt bc i should be doing Something agshfgnfs#i miss him though.......... need to write him n reader having beef again#୧ ‧₊˚orderup!
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in case you're just here for the good stuff, i'll be tagging my personal ramblings as #whmpersonal so you can avoid em BUT this is tangentially related to the game project i'm working on, so stick around i guess? tl;dr: i'll probably make a more coherent post where I ask ppl for help (especially artists). also, i'll be more attentive and answer your asks faster, hopefully. : )
anyway, after a bit of a "review" of my creative process (and i guess my uhh way of living in general?) i've noticed that it's a huge clusterfuck. and that it has been since i was a kid. without some external pressure or an imposed structure (like deadlines, parents or strongly worded emails) i just sort of relied on random surges of productivity to carry me through life. on one hand, it's kinda fun: most of the time i'm not doing anything valuable and then all of a sudden i condense weeks worth of work into several sleepless days during which i feel like An Immortal Unstoppable God. lighting bolts shoot from my fingertips, my eyes glow in the dark, and my caffeine-to-blood volume ratio is hovering around 1.
unfortunately, it's not really sustainable. the "not doing anything valuable" stage that takes up most of my time is not me just chilling. it's me freaking the fuck out about not doing anything despite wanting to and finding myself just. not able to. not to mention that some things just need minor, but constant maintenance - at best i'd just forget about them and face the consequences later on. at worst i'd be acutely aware of them while procrastinating, clueless as to what's wrong with me.
couple that with a couple other unhealthy habits, a microscopic attention span and wow, i fit like all the criteria for adhd. i gotta admit i was super sceptical at first when doing any research, since, well. how the fuck am i even supposed to gain any unbiased insight into this. anyway, i spent a stupid amount of money on an official diagnosis (seriously why is this not covered by insurance gsygx), it took a million meetings and tests and i get a piece of paper that says i have add and deserve some medication.
this has also made me realize that i'm spread out super thin when it comes to projects. i love every single one of them, but im going to have to be a bit more realistic in terms of what can remain in "when it's done" limbo and what needs a bit of a push. the whump game is unique in that it's not just me who wants this to eventually get released. so! what this means is that it needs a proper, project structure. not a .txt on my desktop where i keep a backlog of missing features. but must important of all, it needs ~*people*~. this is the first time i took a step back and estimated how much time everything would take me and yeahhhh i was being very optimistic when i said "playable build in 2023" lol. i've been hesitant to ask for help bc 1. i'm stubborn : ) 2. im bad at coordinating stuff 3. i can't pay ppl - like seriously, there is one person making a model for me (if you're reading this sorry i didn't ask if you want a tag but this is just a personal post where i keep yapping) and it's looking so clean and professional,,, you gotta sell this as an asset.
HOWEVER im getting past the mentality of "i gotta do as much as i can by myself". and also taking meds so that im able to focus on tasks (both gamedev-related and others) and actually pay attention to what im doing. which is great news for development! and answering asks! ill be making a dev post where i tag all the ppl and will also ask for help.
that's it. im on a train rn and bored out of my mind so this is why this post exists, sorry. anyway check out this screenshot of a moment in clone high that i relate to deeply.
#whmpersonal#<- this is the tag#isn't it creative like wow i had to think about it for a couple of minutes#not tagging it as whump dev since it's just me rambling#I'm so bored you don't even know#this train is already late by like an hour??? god#shout out to łódź fabryczna gotta be one of the ugliest train stations known to man
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