#I hate food I wish I never felt hungry ever and I'd never have to eat too survive

[puppyhunger2]

I'm hungry but idk what i can eat or even what I want

EDIT: husband just called & he's bringing home lamb kabobs <3 I hope they taste okay

EDIT EDIT: They were out of lamb kabobs, so now i get nothing :'(

[gard3nias]

11| An overly ambitious hedonistic seductress

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wc: 6.04k

date: 24/08/2024

mdi // masterlist // playlist

—Now playing: Ti vorrei sollevare by Elisa, Giuliano Sangiorgi ✫

Sunday and, just as the name implies, it was a sunny day and the soft breeze of the town never failed to be present. However, as autumn approached, the mornings felt colder, prompting people to grab sweaters and blankets. The chill slowly dissipated as the day progressed, and by noon, temperatures returned to the usual comfortable levels of the summer. Today, unsurprisingly, temperatures rose even further in the afternoon, encouraging everyone to spend more time outdoors to avoid using air conditioners and fans.

Daphne and Cleo's neighbourhood is always silent, having barely any household containing little children who could be playing in their gardens. The only 'disturbance' came from barking dogs, chainsaws, the hammering from workshops or the buzzing sound of tractors from the neighbouring farms.

The neighbours obviously didn't expect they would hear the hysterical laughs of teenagers, the exhausted screams of another teenager and the overall chaos coming from Cleo's home.

She'd laid out her warnings the previous day: "I have a lot of cats"—two cats in reality but she didn't want to specify just to scare them—"My brother hates noise and messy environments" she stated, firmly advising them to leave their childishness at home when coming. Still, everyone knows that giving a piece of advice is useful only if the receiver takes it into consideration.

The five friends were all downstairs in her living room and they were planning on studying outside in her backyard because of the heat so the only thing left to do was take their things outside but suddenly a supposedly five-minute thing started taking way longer than she'd ever wish.

"Damn. The fridge is full as fuck! How many people are living here?" James asked, checking out the contents of the piece of furniture. He was unaware of the mini heart attack his words gave his friend. "Don't!— Don't touch the fridge. If you need anything, tell me. We went grocery shopping just yesterday and my brother eats a lot," she dragged the vowel to enhance the word and seriousness, "So no. If y'all feel hungry, just tell me." The warning was enough for the boys to lift their hands in surrender and back away from the fridge Cleo had just violently closed and was guarding with her whole body.

The girl sighed in relief, glad to have solved the issue only for her eyes to bulge out of their sockets again when she saw Nick approach her fireplace where, upon the sill, were family pictures, most especially, her childhood pictures. Why the fuck didn't she think about removing them earlier?

"Back off, Dominic!" she exclaimed, rushing up to him. The use of his full name had him on alert since it was rare but soon he understood her body language and what she was trying to hide as a mischievous smirk rose on his face. "Oh my God. You don't want me to see baby Cleo's photos?" he excitedly teased, seeing the shift in her as he understood her intentions.

"Nick, I swear to God if you dare— Nick!" she screamed when he made his first attempt to outsmart and pass her. "Nick, please," she begged, her tone wavered between a laugh and a cry because he was laughing at her distress. "They're just pictures and you're cute as fuck now so one can't imagine how cuter you were when you were a baby," he explained in a slightly more serious tone as he tried to understand the real reason behind her worry.

"I don't care and it's not true—"

"It's not true?"

In the meantime, James continued his tour of the floor without attempting to touch any food or object, Asher was tangled in the paws of Cinnamon and Lily while Daphne simply laughed at the scene as she recorded everything.

"I never knew I'd be the heartthrob of cats," he commented, surprised at their grip on his clothes whenever he wanted to detach them from himself. Daphne didn't do anything about it, having no type of experience with cats and most especially, enjoying the new memory that would occupy space in her phone.

"Pose." She finally spoke after laughing for way too much according to Asher. "What do you mean pose?"

"Pose for a picture," she simply repeated like it was obvious. She had to insist a bit more before he complied and posed, forcing a smile through the pain as she compelled herself to take good pictures before bursting into laughs again. This would be good content for her to upload to her Instagram stories and add to her new highlight dedicated to her friends—it already contained a few things thanks to Cleo's tags. And, exactly, she left to do so, leaving Asher in his despair while she lay on the couch to edit the picture with a few doodles and tagging everyone present.

Nick and Cleo had finished their little fight of resistance and the boy was now holding one of the pictures, congratulating Cleo for being a very cute baby while the girl simply stood next to him, checking if the picture was too bad for her, rolling her eyes at the compliments as she held her smiles back and eagerly begging him to stop satisfying his curiosity.

James had finished the tour of the floor and was now bored and that was when he remembered why they were there in the first place. "Hey, guys. Let's hurry and take what we need to study," his words froze the place up. Daphne moved her eyes onto him, Asher stopped struggling with the cats and Nick and Cleo stopped their activity, simultaneously turning around to look at the speaker. "James? Everything all right?" Asher broke the ice.

"Yeah like... you fine?" Daphne joined. Nick and Cleo nodded when the respondent turned in their direction since he was so confused and looking for clarification.

"What?" he asked, receiving no reply for a few seconds before Daphne spoke again, "We're just surprised you of all people suggested that."

"Yep, surprised,"

"Super surprised," Cleo and Nick added right after her. James simply rolled his eyes, realising he was getting worried over nothing.

"What the fuck guys? I thought it was something serious—"

"Oh, he was going to be serious—"

"Asher!" And everyone laughed. James still rolled his eyes and went on with his life while the rest stopped playing around and got up to do what they initially had to do.

"Cleo? Imma need you to come get your fur balls off me. I'm losing my shit. Thank goodness I ain't allergic to their fur. I would've been dead by now."

It was a five-minute thing, taking every book and device they needed. It was almost a twenty-minute thing, taking Cinnamon and Lily off Asher who fought against wailing like a baby in frustration. And that's how they found themselves sitting around the white table they moved to the garden under the protection of the wide white umbrella standing through its centre.

Cleo's home never hosted these many people. Ever since she was a child, the only companion she had with her was her brother, her father and, briefly, her mother. She'd known Nick, James and Asher since middle school but never had she invited them over because the thought never crossed her mind—and also they already spent a lot of time together considering their moments in class and at practice after school. Regardless if she wanted to hang out with them, they would opt for a destination in town, not anyone's home.

Today, when her neighbours peered out their windows into Cleo's garden, they were greeted with an unfamiliar sight: five people sitting around a white table. Usually, when they spotted Cleo in the garden, she would either be playing with her brother, helping him out with something, swinging on the swing hanging from the big tree, or playing with her cats—certainly not whatever she was doing now.

Barely a month had passed since Daphne had moved here permanently so the images of her reading in her garden weren't long-lost memories to the neighbours anymore but rather part of their routine since Daphne had always been reading there since she came back.

When they would look out of their window and into her garden, they'd find her there, sitting and reading peacefully. The only thing changing day by day was her clothing which would get thicker as the temperatures went down and autumn approached.

They didn't know that the five people in Cleo's garden had decided to meet for school reasons although one could deduct it by noticing the books filling the table and the focus painting the expressions of the teenagers.

One could also deduct that James gave no fucks about school and has a hard time staying focused for too long hence the phone in his hands while the rest were working. He had a leg bent over the other with arms crossed and a subtle frown on his face peeking through his blonde hair strands.

They hadn't even studied for an hour and little James was already out of it. He'd sighed many times by now, gaining Asher's side glances the whole time. James couldn't notice that. The only thing he knew was that his friends were boring, this was boring, life was boring and he couldn't bear it any longer. He even looked in Nick's direction, his usual partner in crime, only to find him focused on working, leaving him shocked.

"Isn't it time to like... have a little break?" he suggested only to receive silence as an answer from all of them. They didn't notice him except for Asher who didn't hold back from rolling his eyes. He had to repeat his question a second time before someone other than Asher answered him or, better, looked in his direction at all.

"It's barely been an hour. What are you talking about?" Cleo questioned with an eyebrow lifted. "It's funnier if you remember that he was the one that encouraged us to come out and study," Asher butted in, gaining an eye roll from James.

"Sorry, I can't stay focused for too long. I'm not as braindead as you are," he spoke directly to Asher who took his glasses off, slightly annoyed at the remark.

"You call having a long attention span being braindead? It literally proves that you're the one who's braindead because you don't know what the word itself means and trust me that anyone could appear 'braindead' to you because you can only stay focused for two minutes,"

"Okay, okay. Let's end it there. You wanna take a break? Let's take a break but then you'll have to seriously work later," Daphne interrupted, getting rid of the ponytail that was already stressing her sensitive skull.

James wasn't bothered in the slightest by Asher's words since he'd got what he'd been wishing for so he simply stood up and headed to the kitchen with Cleo running behind him to make sure he wouldn't empty the fridge.

"Be a bit nicer, yes?" Daphne was now speaking to Asher who simply rolled his eyes and got up, leaving her without any reply. She was a bit baffled just as Nick by her right with whom she exchanged looks of confusion before they too got up and went inside.

—Now playing: Beautiful by Lana Del Rey ✫

Once they got to the kitchen, they found James and Cleo arguing about what they could have to eat and, being already a bit annoyed, Daphne made them settle down and excused all of them out of the kitchen so she could handle it herself. Cleo didn't object and grabbed the chance to play outside with only James and Nick because Asher didn't look down for any type of physical activity—maybe only if it meant he could go back home.

He didn't budge from his position, leaning on the counter with legs and arms crossed and staring into nothing. Daphne, on the other end, was busy exploring Cleo's kitchen to understand where to find what.

She wanted to make some sandwiches and was having a hard time finding the pack of sliced bread they'd bought the previous day. She'd already gathered the filling onto the counter ignoring Asher's presence who had stopped staring into nothing and was now looking at Daphne most especially because she had succeeded in finding the sliced bread but it was in the cupboard, a bit too high away—not the cupboard itself because the pack was placed on the top layer.

"They most likely placed it here on purpose 'cause there's no way," she mumbled to herself and she kept jumping, pinching the packet closer and closer to the edge. She'd already jumped a few too many times to her liking especially because she hoped Asher would help her out but it seemed like he was in the mood to hold grudges against her as if she'd wronged him in any way.

She initially felt good because the packet was getting closer and closer and she would manage to get it without his help but her moment of glory was shut down when she accidentally pushed in instead of pinching it closer. When she noticed, she stopped jumping, looked up at the packet and stared in disbelief.

That was when she heard Asher chuckle behind her. Never had she snapped her head around this fast to glare at someone and never had he hid his smile so quickly.

"Were you just laughing?" she questioned, eyebrow slightly lifted and eyes glaring holes in his figure. "Why would you think that?" he questioned back, mirroring her facial expressions.

Daphne wasn't hallucinating, she heard him clearly laughing in her moment of distress and he was now denying it, denying to had been behaving like a bitch because she told him to tune it down.

Yes. She wasn't hallucinating because he indeed was chuckling since he purposely let her struggle for a bit just because he felt like it. He wasn't that immature. Yes, she scolded him a bit and yes, he was a bit harsh but no, he wasn't going to act like a bitch about it. He would've let her struggle even on the best of his days. The only person who could get him back to being annoyed was James and, at the moment, he wasn't there.

Right now, he was staring dead into Daphne's eyes and she did the same with him. The tension between them soon faded away when they both got the cue that it was all in good fun but Nick didn't know this when he walked in to have a glass of water.

The room was so silent and his friends were staring at each other, both with arms and legs crossed and a crooked eyebrow. "Nice staring contest," he thought to himself and he served himself with the glass of water.

Daphne and Asher, on the other end, struggled to hold back their laughs as they could hear Nick's loud gulping sounds. Asher could see it on her face just as she could see it on his that a smile tried to creep up but they would race against the clock to suppress it. They could see it in each other's eyes, the panting, the sweat and the fatigue the race caused them but soon everything resulted to being in vain when Nick let out the loudest burp right after emptying the glass.

Asher immediately burst into laughter while Daphne's eyes almost bulged out of their sockets and rolled onto the floor at the loud sound. Yeah, it was very loud.

"Jesus Christ, Nick. It's just water," she said, laughing at the situation but also Asher's loud laugh and crumbling figure in front of her.

Nick simply smiled as he rinsed the glass and kept it back to where he found it. "Y'all never heard anyone burp before?" he simply asked, seeing how they were losing their shit.

"Nick? That was exceptionally loud especially since you drank ordinary water. Imagine if you had drunk sparkling water," Daphne explained—to be honest, she struggled to explain that because every word that left her mouth would simply increase Asher's laughter's pitch and volume. Nick didn't reply, smiling at how hilarious Asher sounded before going back outside.

"What the fuck?" Daphne asked in disbelief before repeating her question when she saw that Asher had fully turned red and seemed really in need of help.

"Hey, hey! Young man!" she called. His laughter's pitch and volume had vanished as he was silently laughing now, tightly holding onto his stomach—nothing is deadlier than that shit. "This bitch is on the verge of dying, jeez," she laughed, staring at him in hopes he would stop.

He did, a few seconds later but he did and when he came down, he took in a huge amount of air before letting it all out to ease the feeling of his contracted abdomen.

"A burp... almost killed you," Daphne joked, watching him get back up, "Wouldn't have minded anyway because it would have been your karma," she added.

"My karma? For what?"

"For fucking ignoring me and letting me make a fool of myself as I tried to take that fucking pack of sliced bread just because I scolded you a bit before!" she explained, gasping as she saw him start laughing once more.

"Ok. Yes, it's like you're really trying to kill me with laughter and no, I wasn't ignoring you for that. I would ignore you on any day. Your scolding has nothing to do with it. I was having my own type of fun," and Daphne gasped, reaching over to smack his arm as he laughed and finally complied to help her take the packet and make the sandwiches. As background music were the screams and laughs coming from Cleo's garden.

Soon, their conversation moved on to school subjects regarding their project and most especially the campaign. Asher confessed to being interested in running in the campaign but he would only entertain the idea the following year as a senior as he didn't feel ready yet.

Daphne grabbed the chance to ask him what were the requirements for such and even asked if he was interested in becoming the class president.

Their conversation was cut short by the loud scream coming from the garden. It was so loud Asher worried James or Nick had hurt Cleo somehow. Daphne, however, did not share his concern at first, but she still hurried behind him when he dashed out. They both froze when they saw Cleo and Nick wrestling over a ball, with James confused in a corner not knowing if to join in or separate them.

"Erm?" Daphne asked, side-eyeing Asher who simply rolled his eyes again and went back inside.

"Gosh, I thought it was something serious," he said, making it back behind the counter.

"It was obviously nothing serious. Anyone could tell,"

"Yeah, but I'm used to having to medicate Cleo's wounds because of how roughly they play."

"Are they always like that?" Daphne asked, "Like... in compromising positions like that?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean... if an outsider had to take a look at them, they could suspect they are more than just friends, you know," she voiced out, placing the sandwich on the tray. "Were they ever a thing? Because as far as I know, Cleo never told me anything special about Nick."

Her question wasn't a surprise to him. He knew it would've eventually popped up in Daphne's brain and now he just happened to be the person to whom she addressed the question. "Not that I know of," he simply replied, placing his sandwich on the tray.

"Yes, they do look like more than friends and if I'm being honest with you, I always thought that Nick has a crush on her. James too,"

"Really?" Daphne gasped with bulging eyes and he nodded, "But I feel like if Nick does have a crush on her, his has existed for longer. We have known each other since middle school and Nick has always been like this with her. James started only like two years ago if I'm not mistaken,"

"Which was around when Cleo started getting popular and shit, right?"

"Yeah, I guess so,"

"But also, doesn't Nick also behave like this with everyone? I mean, he's not the shy type to worry too much about physical contact,"

"Yeah, he behaves like this with everyone and that's why one can't fully say that he crushes on Cleo because he isn't any different with others but he's just a bit different when it's just us, you know. There is a Nick with Cleo in public and a different Nick with Cleo in private such as hang outs like this. I do think that if James does have a crush on her, she knows and she also doesn't entertain the idea of starting anything serious with him because two years ago I wasn't the only person thinking he liked her. The whole class did,"

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, but I think Cleo just sees him as a friend because she never really commented on the issue and it slowly faded, especially with the popularity she gained. It became easy to simply label him as a fanboy and nothing more,"

Daphne nodded and didn't speak further, looking out where her friends were. A part of her felt like her suspicions were true. Nick probably likes Cleo, James included, and it isn't surprising because Cleo is so charming. Like she'd already stated, Cleo could see the good in people, no matter the bad one could commit and she also seemed to never get sad or angry—unless you bring Valerie into the picture. Cleo is always smiling and happy. She seemed to have a social battery that never runs out and her smile was like a tattoo on her face.

Daphne hadn't seen her play volleyball yet, hadn't seen how competitive and just how skilled she was at the sport. However, Daphne knew Cleo's popularity likely stemmed from her talent in volleyball, indicating that she was genuinely good at it. 

There was just something fascinating about people being good at what they like.

All these were hypotheses that she would've changed into theories if she knew that Jungkook too fanboys over her.

"So right now, we're looking at a potential childhood crush from Nick?" she said looking at the scene in front of her.

Right in that moment, from the counter she could see Cleo and Nick going at it again, dragging to get the ball. They caught the attention of both she and Asher because Nick seemed to be giving Cleo a back hug from where he would occasionally lift her off the ground. She, on the other hand, would bend forward causing him to do the same. Another honestly compromising position.

"James is third-wheeling there," she comments before they get back to making the sandwiches.

"Worse it would be if he indeed likes her too," Asher added, gaining a hiss from Daphne as they both laughed.

—Now playing: Chiquitita by ABBA ✫

The boys left around dinner time, giving the girls enough time to finish tidying up. Daphne stayed back just for that reason.

There wasn't much left for them to take care of since they didn't mess up the place too much and the boys also helped a little before leaving to catch their bus home. Upstairs, Cole was still sleeping while noise still came from Cleo's dad's workshop. Been like that throughout the afternoon.

"Let's hurry cause I have to cook dinner,"

"You?" and Cleo nodded before turning around to sweep the kitchen. "Cole has been studying the whole morning and even after lunch. I just went to check and saw that he fell asleep so he's surely tired as fuck. My dad has been working nonstop on the project he wants to sell in his shop so yeah, I'm taking over the cooking." Daphne unconsciously nodded to the information as she adjusted the little pillows on the couch and armchair, picking up a few things from the floor and keeping others back where they belonged. As she did so, they stopped talking and completely focused on finishing their duty.

Since the boys had already helped with tidying up the living room a bit, Daphne was soon done with the work and was just roaming around, exploring the place now that she had the chance. In the meantime, Cleo was still sweeping the kitchen, trashing the packs of finished snacks that littered the counters. That was when a gasp from the living room diverted her attention away.

"Oh my god! You have vinyl records from ABBA?" Daphne exclaimed, taking the object in her hands and admiring it like it was a brick of gold. Cleo rushed to put the broom aside and went over to her overly excited friend.

"You listen to ABBA?" Daphne proceeded, taking the disc out of the packet and going straight to the vinyl player sitting next to the pile of records. Cleo smiled but the smile didn't reach her eyes. It wasn't the usual smile that painted her face, the infamous tattoo. No, Cleo struggled to smile and Daphne didn't notice.

She wanted to stop her friend, take the record from her hand, keep it back and shut everything up but that would require her to explain herself and if she failed to do so, she'd just leave a bitter taste in her friend's mouth or, worse, make her worry that there's something more. There is something more, but that more can stay in the isolated room Cleo had locked it in. She'd also trashed the key, wishing to never see that door open again. But it didn't stop the pain nor the insisting struggles as the door tried to open itself against its hinges and the lock.

Daphne maybe would've noticed this but maybe right now she was too excited to listen to ABBA or to play music from a vinyl player once again. The last time she'd done so was at Margot's place in the city but she didn't ponder much on that memory, especially now that Margot have been outcasted from her life just as she'd done to her. Daphne loved vintage things so she really had a thing for vinyl records—preferred them to the modern album packaging.

She didn't pay any attention to the song she was putting on since she was a great ABBA fan and eats up anything the group has released.

"You know how to use it?" Cleo finally spoke, her voice almost nonexistent. Again Daphne didn't notice this. Later, Cleo would be thankful for her inattention because she would've regretted dearly bringing worry upon her friend.

Daphne eagerly nodded as she backed away from the player, waiting for the music to start and it soon did as the soft sounds of a guitar started feeling the room.

"Chiquitita, tell me what's wrong?" she started singing along, gathering her hands on her chest as if the song had been produced in heaven.

"You're enchained by your own sorrow, In your eyes there is no hope for tomorrow." Cleo smiled more now. Chuckled a bit at how fondly Daphne sang along.

Her friend behaved as if she was in a music video, arms spreading out and going back to her chest at each word she sang. "How I hate to see you like this. There is no way you can deny it, I can see that you're oh so sad, so quiet."

Cleo's smile almost faded away, understanding the words, the lyrics. What a choice of song, she thought to herself but, again, Daphne didn't know this so she couldn't show any emotion or any suspicious reaction that could cause her friend to ask questions, to worry. "Chiquitita, tell me the truth. I'm a shoulder you can cry on, your best friend, I'm the one you must rely on." Cleo simply smiled. Laughed seeing how her friend struggled to get on the couch and be even more dramatic. Once she got on it, she spread her arms out again, passionately singing and pointing at Cleo as she sang the next words.

"You were always sure of yourself. Now I see you've broken a feather. I hope we can patch it up together." She didn't know that the words were resonating with Cleo, hitting a very sensitive nerve she's been keeping hidden under her sleeve for a long time now and there was no way she could've known because, unlike Taehyung, Daphne isn't a keen observer but just a good listener. Cleo was the same: different from Taehyung, yes, but she was just good at speaking, with her listening skills not as refined as her friend's. Yes, she is so good at talking but, in that moment, she preferred silence because she was scared of having others worry for her. After all, there is nothing scarier than the sudden extinguishing of the sun—and it's not an eclipse.

Cleo was still standing by the vinyl player while Daphne had already travelled around the room and was making her way back to it, back to Cleo and once she reached, she grabbed her friend's hands and dragged her into the centre of the living room to dance.

"Chiquitita, you and I know how the heartaches come and they go and the scars they're leavin'." Cleo's body was a bit tense but not tense enough to resist Daphne's force as she dragged her around. "You'll be dancing once again and the pain will end. You would have no time for grievin'" Daphne sang without caring to hit the right notes as they started spinning and jumping around. She was unaware that her free spirit at the moment eased her friend's tightened muscles, slowly bringing her to enjoy the song and hop around with her.

"Chiquitita, you and I cry but the sun is still in the sky and shinin' above you."

Daphne didn't know this—again. Not just the song but the whole musical group held a certain weight in Cleo's mind and occupied a certain space in her heart. Space she'd rather give to anything else in this world. A weight she'd gladly go on a diet to lose but this type of weight was particular. Wasn't the type you could lose either by going on a diet or starving yourself.

"Let me hear you sing once more like you did before. Sing a new song, Chiquitita," they both started singing, fingers intertwined, arms spread out and heads thrown back as they spun around, sometimes breaking into a simple dance move. "Try once more like you did before. Sing a new song, Chiquitita."

After parting ways for the verses, Daphne started first: "So the walls came tumblin' down and your love's a blown out candle. All is gone and it seems too hard to handle." And then it was Cleo's turn to become dramatic with her gestures as she started singing along to her own part: "Chiquitita, tell me the truth. There is no way you can deny it. I see that you're oh so sad, so quiet."

Again, unaware, Daphne's actions were like gauze covering the wounds lacing Cleo's body and soul. The smile spread across her face was just what Cleo needed to feel at ease.

"Chiquitita, you and I know how the heartaches come and they go and the scars they're leavin'. You'll be dancin' once again and the pain will end. You will have no time for grievin'" Linking arms and running in a circle, they sang their hearts out.

"Chiquitita, you and I cry but the sun is still in the sky and shinin' above you. Let me hear you sing once more like you did before. Sing a new song, Chiquitita." With hands linked like a couple dancing at a ball and making each other spin around, they started singing the post-chorus: "Try once more like you did before. Sing a new song, Chiquitita. Try once more like you did before. Sing a new song, Chiquitita."

As they danced to the instrumentals, Cleo realized that maybe, just maybe, she'd found a possible solution to the weight occupying her mind, to the spot in her heart and to the wounds that were yet to heal.

Daphne had wondered where her mother was the day she came here and saw Cleo surrounded only by her father and Cole at lunch. She wondered what could have happened to her mother. Was she dead? Did the parents go through a divorce? And if they did, were the kids keeping contact with the mother?

Maybe if Cleo had opened up in that moment, she would've had a little answer to all those questions. She would've finally known something. She would've learned that Cleo's mother used to be a great fan of the group, and she was behind the reason why those vinyl records were there in the first place. She would've known that the last time any song from the group was played, the father was who put it on. She would've known that every memory revolving around the group's songs was in black and white in Cleo's head, bereft of any real colour. Cleo was just waiting, hoping, they would fade away completely, with no colours left behind. Not even the outlines. But she has been waiting for years now and her hope is disappearing faster than the memories she despises.

Maybe, with Daphne back in her life, she would be able to take control and instead of waiting for time to do what it does best, she could change her story, change those memories and replace them with something better, something as nice as this: them spinning around to the ABBA song.

But she knew that Daphne's help would be given unknowingly. Cleo would never ask for help but just grab it if it presents itself in front of her. She didn't know this but it was exactly why her healing process was so slow.

All these were uncertainties because Cleo wasn't sure and never would be unless she opened up to someone, anyone. For example, she could open up to her brother: he's always been there for her, through thick and thin but that was exactly why she didn't want to open up to him. He was already doing a lot for her and the last thing she'd want to do is add another weight on his shoulders.

She could also confide in the man watching the girls from outside through a window. He wasn't done with his project which was lying unfinished in his workshop because he rushed outside once he heard the ABBA song. He's the only person in this house listening to any song from that group because they carry a different meaning to each person in his little family. A meaning that revolved around the mother, the one person who had singlehandedly ruined their family, scarring everyone on her way out.

He's been working on his wounds. 'S been trying to turn them into scars and possibly erase them completely but he'd gladly help his children too if only they would let him in.

He was grateful though to have come this far and was also thankful for Daphne's actions at that moment. She was oblivious to the darkness looming around those songs but she managed to shine through and overshadow it allowing his daughter's beautiful smile to come out from its hiding spot.

He smiled too and a tear ran down his cheek as well, but it was a tear of joy. A joy he'd been looking for ever since that day it left their home with their mother. He'd convinced himself that that joy had run away from his family for good but it was slowly making its way back. Maybe the road was too dark, no streetlights present, no guiding star or moon in the sky but thanks to this, thanks to Daphne, a streetlight had restarted working, brightening the way a bit for as much as it could.

He was very grateful for that.

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[yoke9494]

🧜🏻 Kyojuro Rengoku. Pt1 (slight Inoske)

Mermaid Rengoku.

Aged up characters/age gap. (Inoske is older)

⚠️This will contain ⚠️: Yandere characters, dark content, SMUT, Gore, and a bit of crack.

You were hesitant...

A large white yacht came into view as your best friend dragged you onto the docking area.

"Come on Y/n! It's for my brothers birthday! He's always been there for us! Plus you only turn 25 once!"

You shook your head. "I can't believe I let you both talk me into coming. You know I'm scared of this type of thing.. I can't swim Nezuko.."

Your best friend rolled her eyes. "The damn Yacht isn't going to sink! Why do you always think like that?"

You shrugged. "It's a fear.."

She scoffed, but it was soon replaced with a smirk. "Inoske will be there. He's been asking Tanjiro about you.. Y'know... Since you're legal now."

You felt your cheeks warm up. You wished you never told her about the crush you had on her older brothers friend.

Your poor teenage brain just short circuited the day you laid eyes on him. You had gone over to Nezuko's for a school break and didn't know her brother and his friends would be visiting from college.

You were a mess when you were introduced to him while he and Tanjiro were working out in the little home gym they had in the garage.

You were just a studdering clumsy mess! It was so embarrassing.. Some nights you stayed up thinking about it to this day...

Little did you know the beautiful beast of a man thought it was cute, you were cute. But you were way too young for him, you were only 16 and him 20 at the time.

With a low groan you picked up your footsteps to keep up with her. She was so giddy-- not only to see her brother but to also flirt with her own crush as well. Another one of her brothers friends.. Zenitzu.

With a gulp you stepped on the big boat. You've never been on one before and half expected it to rock back and forth. It didn't but your legs still felt shaky..

"Guys! There you are!"

The sunshine in his voice calmed you down a bit. Tanjiro almost jogged up to you guys with the biggest smile.

"You made it!" He looked at you. "I was so worried you'd be too scared. I'm happy you're here Y/n!"

You smiled at him, he was like the brother you never got to have. "It's your birthday Jiro. You've never missed one of mine. Of course I'd tit up and be here."

He smiled and placed an arm around both you and Nezuko before giving you both a kiss on the head. "Best adopted sister ever!. But now that you're both here! We can head off and get this party started."

----------------

The boat was full of people you didn't know. But that was okay because you couldn't really focus on anyone right now-- not when.

"Sorry it took me a while. I found soda but it was warm. I put it in some crushed ice for you-- no alcohol I promise."

Inoske sat down on one of the many chairs next to you. Nezuko and Tanjiro had left you both alone to deal with Zenitzu. (He was getting sea sick)

You weren't really a drinker. In fact, Inoske had just given you your first sip of alcohol a few minutes ago. You hated it! But he was sweet enough to search the kitchen for something non-alcoholic. He even put your soda in a margarita glass with a little umbrella.

"It's okay. And thank you. You really didn't have to go through the trouble of finding me something to drink."

He just shrugged and took a chug of his beer. "It's fine. You deserve to have fun too.. Even with a soda."

It was awkward for about a second. He leaned closer to you. "How's college going for you?"

You hummed. "Good! I like all my classes so far.--"

He listened to you while you babbled on. He did care but not really at the same time. He just liked to hear you talk.

"I'm hungry. You want to raid the kitchen?"

That sadly shut you up. But he hasn't had anything to really eat today.

"--Yes!"

He grabbed your hand and weaved you through all the bodies. Everyone was either too busy dancing, drinking, or humping to even pay attention to the food.

All well, sucks to suck. More for you and Inoske.

"Sweet! They got baby cheese burgers."

You snorted. "I think they're called sliders?"

He rolled his eyes and popped one into his mouth before grabbing the whole tray. "Get more sodas, a bag of chips, and follow me!"

You ran around the kitchen, stuffing sodas in your pockets, bra, arms, and a bag of chips in your teeth. -- the private chef that was working just stared at you and Inoske.. At least someone was eating the food they guessed.. But some sober conversation would have been nice.

And that's exactly what Inoske had in mind. Conversation... But private. He wanted to be away from all the loud music and drunk people. He knew once Tanjiro got drunk he became more lovey. (Yeah. It's possible..)

But he just wanted to be in the quiet (ish).. With you .. In a private small room that Tanjiro had given him keys to. He had left the sliding door to the small balcony open just enough to hear the music.. And Zenitzu yelling.

His usually hyper temper had been turned down to the lowest setting just so he can get to know you more. Tanjiro and Nezuko could only tell him so much. And for once he could understand what you were saying. You weren't a studdering mess anymore.

But that was okay. He liked the new confidence. Especially when you laughed..

You snorted so loud your baby cheese burger almost flew out of your hand. "You did not?!"

Inoske nodded. "I did. I got so drunk and woke up the next day sleeping with a bunch of boar's in a mud field. They were cool though"

You were having so much fun listening to his stories. You completely ignored all the drunk "Is he in yet?" texts from Nezuko.

While he began another story of his drunken collage days. You reached for a slider-- only your hands bumped into one another.

It was the last one...

"I'll fight you for it."

You looked at Inoske with a raised brow. "You sure you wanna get beat up by a girl?"

All he did was smile. His pretty green eyes narrowing at your weaker figure. "Really? You have that much confidence in yourself?--"

You nodded.

"Well aren't you brave."

--------------

You were brave! But you weren't strong..

The poor slider was long forgotten, it sat lonely and cold while you and Inoske began to do a little more than okay fighting.

At first this was a serious battle for the deliciousness that was a mini cheeseburger. You and Inoske were both crazy when it came to good--

But the second he pinned you under him, you both became lost in one another.

Somehow his shirt had been taken off. He was settled between your legs while holding your wrist down.

He did want to make you uncomfortable. This actually wasn't apart of his plan. He genuinely just wanted to hang out and talk.

But you smelled so good, and he could feel the heat of your body through your clothes. He looked at your plump lips--

He couldn't. He was about to pull himself off of you. But it was you who leaned up and kissed him. You who opened your legs a little more so you could feel how hard he was against you.

"Can I take these off?"

He was talking about the tights you had on under the skimpy blue dress Nezuko got for you. This wasn't how you usually dressed, she was going to have you practically butt naked! But thankfully/ regrettably you talked her into letting you wear black tights.

You nodded-- "That's fine."

Slowly the tight fabric rolled off of you and you found yourself a little disappointed?

No he wasn't doing anything wrong. He left a trail of sloppy kisses from your lower stomach down to your ankles. But you've heard stories-- He was mean in bed, more wild. You half expected him to rip your clothes to shreds like he did others. You didn't know why you wanted to experience that--

Again he was holding himself back. Keeping his normal self at bay.. He didn't want to scare you off. No matter how bad he already wanted to rip you in two. This while slow thing wasn't him..

He assumed it was more your speed. Hell he didn't even know if you were still a virgin or anything. Yeah you were nearly 19 but that didn't mean you had sex yet. People wait and that's okay.. But then again you were beautiful, a little on the obedient side.. Some guy had to at least try right?

"Is something wrong?"

He hadn't noticed he stopped halfway and just stared at you. Stupid him, he was blowing it. "Sorry.. Uh. This is okay right? Are you like a virgin or something?"

You furrowed your brows. "No? I've been fucked before."

Now, why did you have to say it like that? So dirty-- Where did that girl who stayed up late with Nezuko trying to bleach their hair with lemon juice go? That girl who giggled when some half naked dude popped up on TV?

Not that he was going to complain. That meant he didn't have to be so nice.

And he wasn't...

--------

Your eyes eyes rolled to the back of your skull. Nails dug into the sheets as you tried your hardest to keep yourself up.

Your back was in a mean arch as he fucked you from behind. A ring of white already foaming around his cock from your coming undone. But that didn't mean he was going to stop his brutal pace. He gave you your high and he was going to chase his.

He didn't care that you were shaking and already crying from overstimulation.

"INOSKE!!"

That wasn't you screaming for him-- His movements came to a halt as you caught your breath.

Inoske's voice was rougher. "Did you hear that?"

You didn't---

Loud bangs pounded against the door. "INOSKE!-- Y/N!! COME OUT HERE!!"

This time the voice was different.. It was Nezuko! She sounded like she was drunk?

Inoske clicked his tongue as he slowly pulled out of you. Your poor body falling to the mattress.

"Fucking Kamado's can't hold their liquor for shit.."

He was pissed. But he wouldn't dare take it out on you-- unless it was with his dick.. He helped you get cleaned up and dressed. You both flinched when the lights in the bathroom began to flicker.

You looked around while they flickered once again. "Thats freaky.."

Inoske raised a brow. "You scared of the dark?"

You shook your head. "More like this Yacht sinking. The Titanic's lights flickered like crazy as it sunk"

He snorted. "I doubt there are any icebergs around here  baby."

Oh that was a new name..

But before you could mention it he stood up after helping you put on your shoes. "Alright. Let's go see what they want. Maybe we'll finish later. I didn't get to cum."

You nodded and followed after him back into the loud music and drunk bodies..

"Y/n!! Did you fuck?!"

You were jumped by a very intoxicated Nezuko.

"Don't talk like that!-- did you guys fuck?"

Tanjiro was next as he threw himself into Inoske. God he was so different drunk..

Zenitzu ran into the room with what looked like a puke bag. His eyes landed on you and his friend. You hair a mess and fresh scratches down Inoske's arm. The beast didn't even have a shirt on, just his shorts and shoes.. and he looked pissed!

Oh fuck..

Zenitzu cleared his throat. "Crap. I'm sorry for interrupting you guys.. I tried to handle them on my own but they both got away from me."

Inoske was about to tell him off but Nezuko interrupted him. "Y/n I don't feeeel so gud."

You sighed. "Okay let's go to the deck. Feed the fishes, get some air and all that.."

She nodded.. and you left the boys alone to deal with Tanjiro.

Your poor girl threw up everything in her stomach off the side of the boat. You even swore you saw the pop tart she ate this morning fly into the water.

You held her pretty hair back as she continued. Slowly she was sobering up and the fear of never stopping was kicking in.

"You'll be fine Nezuko. You just need to get it all out, let your body do what it needs."

She shook her head. "I'm dying-- help me! Distract me please-- I'm-- *barf* dying!"

You huffed, what would keep this girl occupied. You didn't have any juicy gossip right now-- wait..

"It hurt Nezuko, but I hurt so good. I'm throbbing right now."

She stopped heaving and looked at you with wide eyes. A squeal left her mouth. "I knew he was big! I mean come on! The guy is all rage and muscle.-- Tell me more!"

You tried, but it all got you flustered and giggly. You both were like hormonal school girls again. Crushing on guys you had no business crushing on..

But halfway through you showing Nezuko the bite mark Inoske left on your back--- A cold shiver ran up your spine. The air was warm and your skin was dry, where did it come from.

For some reason your eyes traveled to the water. A sick feeling began to claw at your stomach as you watched the waves roll from the Yachts movements-- You sucked in a breath when you swore you saw something!

"Helloo? Y/n? What's wrong?"

Nezuko waved her hand in front of your eyes. You shook your head. "I thought I saw something in the water."

Nezuko furrowed her brows and looked out into the water. She didn't notice how creepy it all looked-- just completed darkness..

"Hmm. Maybe it was a fish? Dolphin? We are in the middle of know where right now. At least for a few hour's.."

You both stood closer to one another. Both feeling a little uncomfortable-- like you were being watched..

You grabbed her hand. "Should we head back now? It's kinda spooky back here.."

She nodded. "Yeah. I'm a bit sober now so I think maybe we should go eat something and sit with the guys.."

That was the best idea she's ever had! The kitchen was a bit full now-- The private chef really put his back into everything. You thanked him for earlier and told him his food was the best you've ever had. That seemed to make the old guy happy.. So much that he gave you fresh out the fryer Tempura.

You remembered Inoske saying it was one of his favorites so you didn't hesitate to take it..

Tanjiro tried to wiggle his eyebrows when you and Nezuko found them. Poor thing was drunk out of his mind-- Zenitzu held his head down in shame as Inoske just laughed. Tanjiro was usually the uptight one, the mother hen of the group. It was good when he let himself go once in a while.

Inoske ignored the kissy noises coming from him as he help you hit on his lap. Who were you to complain about his sudden clinginess when he was just rearranging your guts a few minutes ago.

Zenitzu was about to do the same. He and Nezuko shared a also kiss earlier-- before she started puking.. That wasn't because of him right? But Tanjiro beat him to it-- He sat on the floor and patted his empty seat.

"Sis down Nezuko."

She gave him a smile and did so. Even though she was hoping for Zenitzu to pull the same move Inoske did..

The conversation flowed-- you and Inoske are and chimes in here and there. Zenitzu was in the middle of telling his story about --

You were nearly jerked out of Inoske's lap. The Yacht came to a violent halt-- Inoske held onto you tight as the Yacht jerked forward again, the light flickered and the music skipped and became distorted before --

*Zaaap!*

Complet darkness too over the big boat-- gasp a a few dramatic screams filled the pitch black darkness that now surrounded everyone..

Tanjiro lifted up his phone and turned on his flashlight. Zenitzu and a few others did the same.

(Inoske) "What's the fuck? Did you forget to pay the light bill?"

You knew he was trying to calm you down-- but it wasn't helping much.

Tanjiro clicked his tongue. "Shit-- we don't really have a crew to look at what's going on. Since it was last minute all we have is a chef and captain.."

Nezuko jumped up and grabbed into Zenitzu."Didn't you go to school for electrical work? Can you see what's wrong.."

Oh shit... Duh! It was probably the Yachts breaker? He saw an outlet in the hall that looked like it was getting gang banged earlier. He knew it was going to cause trouble..

"Y-yeah! I can look." He turned to her brother. "Tanjiro, Inoske,.. come with me. You know I hate the dark."

You both sighed.

(Inoske) "I'll lead the way--"

Another jerk sent you forward this time. Both you and Tanjiro lost your balance --

A piercing scream came from the dance floor..

(Zenitzu) "What the--"

A loud whistle and buzzing noise flew over you before you head a sticky *Thud* and we gargling close by..

Nezuko made the mistake and turned on her phones light. Right next to her was a body jerking with blood literally spraying out of its mouth.

Tanjiro shot up to grab his sister to hide her face in his chest-- you all were in shock!

You knew this girl! She was an older sister to a boy you sat with in one of your morning classes! He talked about her so much! She was going to open her own bakery...

"We need to help her!"

"What the fuck is this thing?!"

You looked to where Zenitzu was trying to stop her bleeding. A black and white spear? -- what in the-- It was pierced into her stomach, keeping her body pinned to the wooden floor.

The lights let out a loud hum before they suddenly popped back on. A few flicked on so bright that some popped and glass began to fly-

Screams made your ears sting as different colored spears flew onto the Yacht and into the crowd of people.

The girls body suddenly jerked before it was ripped in half right in front of your eyes. The speak in her stomach took her upper half into the water while her legs and guts shook.

"Y/n!"

You were pushed by Inoske just to see a Pink and green spear stab into his shoulder!

"Inos!!!--"

Nezuko's own bloodied body was pushed onto yours on the floor. Tanjiro was covered in blood from head to toe since he and her were closest to the body--

"Get inside! Now!"

You were both shaking, crying,-- But you both pulled one another up and tried to hurry inside--

Almost there! Just a few steps! The air smelled metallic and sour! Screams were slightly dying down but only because bodies were being yanked into the water. Full or in pieces..

Nezuko yanked open the door to the kitchens but--

White Hot pain shot up from your foot to your leg and glued you to your spot. Nezuko turned when your still body jerked her back---

He eye full tears as she dropped to her knees. "Nononono-- Y/n help me!"

The burn of her trying to yank the thing out of your foot brought you back to reality.

Tears flooded your vision and every curse in the book left your mouth. Both you hands couldn't get a grip on the damn thing! It was covered in red and orange coral and gems.. They cut into your palms causing you both to slip--

Another spear almost got Nezuko's head. But she had moved fast enough for it to only cut through her hair--

White and green-- You scream for her- "Run! Just run! We cant--"

She shook her head and still tried to get your free-- "N-nit leave you!"

But a crack had you crying out for your mother. Like a child that fell and broke their foot..

Your body was yanked away from Nezuko as the spear was yanked out of the flooring. The entire left side of your body burned like you were one fire before the shock of the cold water swallowed your body.

In a panic you began to kick at the water, even though it felt like death to do so. Your hands clawed at the water as the distorted image of Nezuko and the Yacht slowly passed by--

You screamed into the water-- And due to your bodies naturally nature it began to try and search for air.

Your lungs burned as they  constricted. Cold water rushed down your throat--

Your body felt heavy-- vision going dark the more you tried to breathe...

You felt something grab your leg. You didn't want to look-- you couldn't! You still tried to claw at the water as if you could climb it and get back into the Yacht..

Hands grabbed your waist. At least you hoped it was! Someone jumped in to save you. Strong arms wrapped around you...

You thanked the heavens for Inoske-- On its own your body relaxed, eyelids too heavy to keep open but you needed to see him---

Only it wasn't a head of blue and black hair. The last colors you saw were yellow and red...

..........

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #199

Have you ever bought a YouTuber’s merch? I have two Cloak shirts, which is owned by Markiplier and jacksepticeye. I would love to have more products by YouTubers with how much of my time goes into watching their shit lmao

Do you think oatmeal tastes better when made with water or milk? MILK. It's not even a competition.

Have you ever left a note in a library book? No.

What time of day do you prefer to wash your hair? Daytime, because I have more strength in my legs early in the day.

Has anyone ever spread lies about you? Yeah, I'd say by the time you're an adult, most people have dealt with this to some severity.

Have you ever taken a photograph with a celebrity? If so, did it turn out the way you wanted, or do you wish you could retake it? No. I'm kinda scared to do this even if I had the opportunity, because first of all I'd feel annoying, but also, I'm sure I'd hate how I looked in it lol.

If you could move out of your home country permanently, would you? If so, where would you go? Not by this phase in my life. I know and cherish too many people here to leave. I hate the U.S., but I love these people more than I hate this county.

Do you think that after we die our spirit is still alive? I think so, at least in some way, but I won't bet my life on that. Honestly I'm fine with the concept of after death, there's nothing. No awareness. I really think it adds more beauty to life while we have it.

Have you ever felt like you were someone’s rebound? No.

Did you have a lot of role models as a kid? I wouldn't say A LOT. It was mostly people like Steve Irwin or Jeff Corwin, Jane Goodall too.

Do you feel like anyone looks up to you? Why or why not? Big no, because what's there to look up to? What've I got goin' on over here? I don't mean that in a pity-hungry sort of way, I just factually am not doing inspirational things, other than fighting mental illness I suppose.

Who is the nicest person you know? My mom.

Do you feel safe in your country? Not really, no, because I'm just waiting for a bomb to drop on the capitol, and certainly NC would be in the blast radius. I'm pretty convinced that's how I'm gonna die, tomorrow or 40 years from now.

Do you know anyone who has been struck by lightning before? Not directly, but my mom did get shocked one night during a severe storm when she was just running water into a soda can to clean it before disposing of it. She's joked that she's still waiting for her new powers to come in, lol.

Which cartoon character would you want to keep as a pet? An Eevee or Vulpix.

Do you like marshmallows? Yes.

Have you ever fostered an animal? No, I'd never be able to let it go.

Have you ever thrown up from cramps? No, thank christ.

Would you ever start a vlog? No.

What are your favorite spicy foods? Hot wings or things like spicy Cheetos or Takis.

Did you feel insecure in high school? I was WAY more confident in myself than I am now. Like yeah, I did have some insecurities, but they're NOTHING compared to now.

What was your favorite class in high school? Art.

If you’re female, would you feel uncomfortable having a male gynecologist? I would 1,000% refuse to see a cis male gynecologist. If you do not have a vagina yourself, I'm sorry, I don't trust your reasons for wanting that career.

What gives you nightmares? Just going to sleep, dude. I have some sort of nightmare condition that's baffled the doctors I've seen.

Were you ever hospitalized as a child? No.

Did you get senior pictures taken? No.

Would you rather wear ivory or white on your wedding day? What color will your bridesmaids wear? I'm probably wearing black. I want the theme to be black and gold, but I'm going to assume gold bridesmaid dresses are expensive, so we'll probably do orange, idk.

Do you think babies are cute? Some are, but very rarely are newborn/very young babies even remotely cute. It happens, but. If I think your baby is cute, you did good lmao

Have you ever moved to another state? No.

Can you say the alphabet backwards? No.

If you were to make videos on YouTube, what would they be of? I have no idea, I've thought of this.

Posting pictures of yourself in a bathing suit on the internet - ok or not? Of course it's okay, I personally just wouldn't do it because I'm too self-conscious.

If you’re in a bad mood, would you rather be with friends or alone? Alone.

What’s the last thing you took a picture of? My cat being cute.

Are you good at remembering birthdays? god hell no, I wish.

Do you listen to podcasts? I don't, except sometimes when I'm in the car with Girt, he'll occasionally have one on instead of music.

Would you rather watch a movie in a theater or at home? The theater, for sure. I enjoy that experience.

Who’s the messiest person you know? My sister's kids, lol. I know the vast majority of young children tend to be messy, but those three are next fuckin level, my mom can't stand it because she raised us girls completely the opposite.

Are you close with any of your exes? No.

What’s your favorite type of cheese? I'm such a basic bitch, American. Most cheeses I don't like.

Can you read sheet music? I could once upon a time, I played the flute all through middle school and almost all of high school, but I couldn't anymore.

Have you ever lived in a mobile home? No.

How many times in the past week have you eaten fast food? Once, I wanna say.

Do you prefer carbonated or uncarbonated drinks? Carbonated.

Favorite thing that you can see up in the sky? The moon, stars, aurora borealis... so muchhhhh

Friend asks you to hide drugs, booze etc for them, do you do it? Nope.

You fill your best friend’s Xmas stocking, what do you put in it? Some Sour Patch gummies, maybe a pair of socks, a Buffalo Wild Wings gift card or something, uhhhhh... I'm not sure of the rest. He is so super hard to buy for, considering if he wants something, he's able to just buy it. It's not just me, even his mom and sister struggle with presents for him.

You fill your worst enemy’s stocking, what do you put in it? Nothing, because I'm not interested in investing my time into her.

You fill your OWN stocking, what do you put in it? A Mountain Dew Voltage, my favorite Reese's bar, a book, gift cards I guess, maybe some video game.

If someone gave you a kitten, would you keep it? I'd like to, but I don't think Mom would be game for it because Tobey (landlord) would supposedly have a cow.

Favorite type of cracker: Cheez-its.

Animal you like to watch but sort of creeps you out: Centipedes.

Bagels or English muffins? Bagels.

Who is a family member you look forward to seeing on a holiday? My dad.

Do you do anything to recognize St Patrick’s Day? No.

Who mows the lawn at your house? Well because it's winter we haven't needed to, but during the warm months, Mom used to pay Nicole's ex to do it, but she hasn't been pleased with his supposedly very uneven and rushed work, so she gave the daughter of a dance mom a try last, and she was super impressed. I'm definitely assuming she'll pay her again this year.

Where do you keep your phone at night? Normally, it sits under the pillow that Girt uses when he's here, but if he spends the night, then I just sit it on my bedside table.

Best Happy Meal toy you ever got: Oh I have no idea.

Do you like the color yellow at all? It's one of my least favorite colors, actually. I do like a very light, pastel yellow, though.

Who sings the last song you listened to? Till Lindemann.

Have you ever watched South Park? Who’s your favorite character? I have, with other people. I was never really into it.

What member of your family are you most similar to? In which ways? My half-sister Katie. We struggle very similarly mentally and are alike personality-wise.

If you could have any animal as a pet, what would you have? At this current time, a tarantula. Preferably a Brazilian Black.

Do you ever shop at Aldi? Do you even have one nearby? We have one very close actually, and Mom will go there every now and again, primarily with Nicole if she wants to go there.

Do you enjoy rhododendrons? Look man, I enjoy basically any flower you could name. I just love them.

Have you ever met someone who supports Nazism? Yes, Sara. She liked to be "technical" about it in calling her branch Neo-Nazism, but she was still a fucking Nazi, I had her explain her way of thinking plenty because I was trying to understand that she wasn't politically evil but never did. She didn't believe Jews deserved to die, but Hitler and his doctrine were her political idols. Which is evil, if you somehow forgot.

If you’ve ever been to another country, what was the best thing you did there? I haven't. :(

What’s the worst sickness you’ve ever had? Some fucking insane stomach virus I had as a teen, I'd say. I will never forget hurling my guts up past the point where only bile was coming out. The abdominal cramps were mental.

Is your favorite animal something you can have as a pet? In certain countries, but thankfully not here in North America. I aggressively wish that it was illegal everywhere, like there is no case of you giving a meerkat everything it needs to be well, all the while saving your house and personal relations with how territorial they are.

Are you good at gardening? To be fair I've never really tried. I did help Colleen's in-laws with their personal garden quite a bit one summer, and I can tell you I FUCKING hated it, because of how out of shape I was but even moreso because of my hyperhidrosis, but I've never tried it on my own. I'd actually quite like to get into plants, and I'd LOVE to grow specifically berries when I have my own place, but I have strong doubts I'd care enough to maintain everything. Depression already makes that challenging with other things.

What was the last classic novel you read? Did you enjoy it? The Yearling, I loved it.

Do you own any pet fish? What kind of fish are they? No, pet fish aren't my thing.

When was the last time you took your pet to the vet? What was wrong with it? Quite a few months ago when Roman apparently had an ear infection.

Have you ever known someone who was in an abusive relationship? I know multiple people who have, and one who still is.

[purplesurveys]

1972

How is your boyfriend/girlfriend doing?: ?

Do you have anything to pay off?: No. I haaate the feeling of having that on my shoulders, so I only ever do installments in extreme cases and have only done so once - when I bought my current phone.

What are you wearing right now?: I'm wearing a black tank top and cargo pants.

What are you listening to?: Eyes, Nose, Lips by Taeyang.

Where did you first hear this song?: Honestly? probably from BTS content, since they're some of the wildest Bigbang fanboys I know, lmao. I can't remember if it was from an In the Soop episode, Suchwita, or someplace else.

Are you the one that normally makes the first move?: In the two times I was in a relationship, I did the first move-ing, yeah.

Would you sacrifice yourself for a friend?: Only for Angela, I feel like.

What's really annoying you right now?: Nothing. I'm feeling pretty ok tonight actually!

What did you do today?: I went to mass with my family, had birria tacos (FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME!!! How'd it take me this long?!) for lunch; took the dogs to the vet before I napped for the rest of the afternoon; and now I'm taking this at 7:30 PM before we have dinner.

Are you always in a hurry?: Kind of. I grew up watching my mom rushing through everything and walking 3x faster than anyone so I kind of adopted that behavior. Plus, my lifestyle doesn't help anyway – I'm a 9-6 corporate slave in the country's capital. Life is ALWAYS in a hurry whether I want it to be or not.

Do you drink/smoke?: I drink socially and vape. I haven't smoked in 5-6 years, but I'd be up for it if and only if I'm asked, and only if the inviter would give me one of their sticks as I'd never buy my own.

What's one horrible thing you do?: I'm a bit judgey and hyperconscious of people's educational backgrounds, especially in the context of work i.e. if I'm screening them for a job vacancy. I do actively try to put my prejudices aside, but 100% the interviews end up speaking for themselves anyway and people from the Big 4 are simply better at talking and presenting themselves.

What do people label you as?: Corporate slave who can't ever resign.

Do people see you as a preppy person?: I don't think so?

Whats your shoe size?: 5.

Do you currently work?: Yup.

What do you miss the most?: The compassion and flexibility that the pandemic provided. I don't miss the pandemic itself, obviously...but I wish people could always look out for one another as we did back then. Or that the world could be as kind as it was at the time.

Who do you know you can depend on?: Angela, my parents sometimes...myself.

Do you take any prescribed medication?: Nope.

Have you ever watched a needle go into your own skin?: No thanks, I will always look away.

Have you ever seen someone get a piercing/tattoo?: I watched my mom get tattooed but I felt so bad for her that I ended up walking away, lmao. She was very much in pain and was clutching a pillow like her life depended on it.

Are you currently full or hungry?: I'm a little full.

Has a taste of something ever made you smile?: Always! I love food and being able to eat my favorites is an easy way to make me happy.

When you're done eating finger foods, do you usually lick your fingers?: It depends on the situation. I wouldn't be doing it with people I don't know that much.

Who was the last person to hit you in the stomach?: That sounds terrible and I'm just thankful I'm part of the population who''s never had to experience this.

Do you think twenty-two is old?: Not at all.

As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?: I wanted to be an author.

Are you planning on going to college?: I did attend college, yes.

Do you know someone that is/was abused by their parents?: Yes.

Does your cell phone have a touch screen?: It does, as do most phones these days I think.

Do you like strawberry and banana smoothies?: NOPE

Would you cuss the person you hate the most out to their face?: I wouldn't let them win like that.

Do you know someone that is mute, deaf or blind?: My great-grandma's caregiver was mute and deaf.

Have you ever spent more than two weeks in a wheel chair?: I've never sat on a wheelchair.

When you cry, do you hyperventilate?: It has definitely reached that point before but it's not a default thing.

Is tapioca pudding nasty to you?: I hate pearls as it is so I imagine finding this nasty, yes.

Is pudding nasty period?: I wouldn't say that, although it's also not my snack of choice.

Is there a lot of drama in your life?: At work, yeah. But thankfully it's drama I only need to deal with every 9-6 so I can log off that shit and mind my own life immediately after, lmao. This one girl has formed such a high school culture around the workplace that it's unbearable to be around people now.

Do you drink straight from the bottle, instead of getting a cup?: It depends on the drink.

Have you ever been in a taxi?: Very seldom. I never ride the taxis here because all I hear are horror stories of them ripping passengers off...and abroad, I try to use ride-hailing apps if they have one. Earlier this month, I did ride a taxi twice in Japan but that's been the first time since...idk, the last 8-10 years.

Do you listen to modern music or classic music?: Modern.

How many times have you had the hiccups today?: Zero.

Does weed smell good? Or no?: I'm mostly indifferent to it.

Where do you see your closest friend in ten years?: Even more successful in her career than she is now, two kids, and traveling a lot with her family.

Pronunciation of your name, please?: I've noticed it's Ruh-bin if you're doing a Western accent; Roh-bin if you're Filipino hahahahaha

Are/were you loud in class?: Never. I hated being called out! I couldn't understand why the yappers in class stayed as yappers even if they constantly got scolded.

Do you cut out coupons but end up never using them?: No.

Name all the ways you can say 'goodbye': There's English, Filipino, Spanish, French, German, Korean, Italian, and Japanese – 8.

[untilwedont]

can i pls request Vinnie hacker x male reader? The story is inspired by Happier than ever. Vinnie and Reader were in a toxic relationship and M/n finally leaves him. Than you!!

Happier Than Ever

Pairings: Vinnie Hacker x Male!Reader

Warnings: Strong language

When I'm away from you, I'm Happier Than Ever

Wish I could explain it better, I wish it wasn't true.

"Vinnie, what the fuck?! Do you seriously think I'm cheating on you? It was a hug! One fucking hug!" Both of you guys had been fighting for almost an hour. This wasn't even the longest you both have fought before, but this one was probably the worst of them all. Things were thrown across the room, stuff was smashed, all because Vinnie thought you were cheating on him.

"Oh, don't play stupid with me, M/N! He was all over you the whole fucking time, but you didn't seem to care!" Vinnie said throwing his arms up.

"Vinnie, listen to me when I say this. He is just a friend, okay? Ju-"

"Just a friend?" Vinnie scoffed, "Yeah okay." Vinnie said leaving the room.

You call me again, drunk in your Benz, drivin' home under the influence

"Hello, vin? Are you alright?"

"HhHey baaAbe. Oon my waY home." Vinnie slurred.

"Vinnie are you drunk?! Do not tell me you're drunk!"

You scared me to death, but I'm wasting my breath, cause' you only listen to your fucking friends

You flinched as Vinnie raised his hand in the air. You looked at Vinnie, fear in his eyes. "M/n.." Vinnie said, attempting to place his hand on your shoulder. "Don't touch me.." You said removing his hand from your shoulder and leaving the room. This wasn't the first time it happened. Every time he raised he hand in the air while you both were fighting, you felt like he was always going to hit you. He always made up an excuse, but deep down inside you, you felt like he wanted to.

I don't relate to you, no, cause' I'd never treat me this shitty. You made me hate this city

"Vinnie, please tell me how the hell you can forget about our anniversary. We've been together for 3 years! You've never forgotten about our anniversary, so why is it now that you do?!'

"M/N, can you chill the fuck out? I mean, it's not even a big deal. Isn't me loving you already enough?"

"Loving me, huh?" you scoff, "Vinnie you sure have a way of showing your love for me."

And I don't talk shit about you on the internet, never told anyone anything bad. Cause' that shit's embarrassing, you were my everything, and all that you did was make me fucking sad

After you broke up with Vinnie, he started posting all your secrets, pictures, etc. He completely exposed you, but this only made things worse for Vinnie. "He's a fucking douche, M/N. Don't cry over him, okay? Even though he did leak everything, it completely backfired on him." Your friend said. "Just be happy you're out if that toxic relationship. You deserve to be happy."

So don't waste the time I don't have, and don't try to make me feel bad I could talk about every time that you showed up on time, but I'd have an empty line cause' you never did

"I've had it with you Vinnie! I've fucking had it with you! This is like the 20th time you've called our dates off! And for what? Just so you could hang out with a couple of your shit friends?!"

"M/N, we've had plenty of dates, plenty! You always hang around me and I never get any time to see my friends! You aren't the only one in my life M/N!"

"Vinnie, you saw your friends yesterday, and the day before that, and the day before that, so don't you play fucking stupid with me! Vinnie I'm tired, okay? I'm tired of trying to keep this relationship stable Vin, but it's not working out. We aren't good enough for each other. I think it's time to call it quits between us Vinnie."

Never paid any mind to my mother or friends so I shut them all out for you cause' I was a kid

"Hey vin, my friends offered to go get food, do you wanna go?"

"Seriously, right now?' Vinnie said laying in bed, "Can't we just stay here? I'm not even that hungry."

"Yeah" you sighed, "Sure.." You left the room.

You ruined everything good. Always said you were misunderstood. Made all my moments your own, just fucking leave me alone!

You looked at your phone, so many notifications from Vinnie. The same few texts messages, "M/N, please take me back!" or "I'm sorry M/n! Can we please work things out!" or "I never meant to hurt you! I love you with all my heart. Please M/N!" You knew Vinnie was very manipulative. You knew he didn't mean what he said. "Leave me the fuck alone Vinnie! We're done. I don't know how many times I have to tell you." That was the final message you sent to Vinnie. You hoped you would never need to see him again/.

[thekingdomofelfhame]

Jurdan Fanfic: Highschool AU Part 1

Summary: Much to Jude's annoyance and surprise, she and Cardan have been paired for a school project. Cardan's feelings, on the other hand, continue to blossom when he arrives at Jude's apartment only to witness something beyond his comprehension.

Warnings: Mild cursing

This will be an alternative between Cardan and Jude POV just to get a good look at how their feelings develop.

Cardan POV:

She keeps staring at the ring enclosing her finger, her gaze never shifting to the notes scattered on her dressing, her walnut eyes intense with emotion. She kept humming the same tune over and over, her voice as smooth and soft as butter as she traced invisible patterns on her ruby studded ring, its bright red colour magnifying the beauty of her hand.

I had never seen her like this: bursting with emotions. Standing before me was the same girl who lived in impenetrable walls, walls that I had been trying to overcome only to lead us down a path of hatred. She was the girl of steel, no titanium, and yet she melted away like snow in early spring when no one was around.

Her voice echoes in the room which-surprise, surprise- is a mess of pillows and papers. This girl had been haunting my dreams since sophomore year but my foolish imaginations were nothing compared to the beauty that stood before me and when she starts vocalizing, I swear my heart skips a beat.

As she turns to pick up her phone, her eyes find mine and I am robbed of the melodious voice that had filled this room a few seconds ago. I am pretty sure I see her eyes swimming in tears but she immediately blinks them away. She has trained herself well.

I hadn't even realized she was in her bathrobe until she stopped singing and am left with her perfectly masked yet startled cuteness when she becomes aware of her current state.

"Why'd you stop?" I say clearly disappointed, "your voice is beautiful"

"Weren't you supposed to be here at 11 30?", she says completely ignoring what I just said, tightening her robe around her.

"I clearly said I'd be at your place by 11", my eyes skim over her robe and am pleased to see her cheeks flush with colour as I say, "maybe I'll make a habit of coming early"

"How'd you even get in?"

"Your roommate let me in and, oh, she told me to inform you that she will be staying with her boyfriend for a while"

"Wow. She and Van are really speeding things up", there a short pause that feels like eternity before she says, "Okay, now could you go wait in the lounge while I get ready?", she says and something tells me she is not asking. Though I would very much prefer to stay, I obey her orders for she is The Queen of my heart.

Jude POV:

I walk out of the room, no longer dripping, and am utterly surprised to find Cardan lounging on the white sofa, one of his legs draped over the arm rest. He looks...comfy.

I think about the way he was looking at me in awe when I found him leaning against my door, his dark black eyes peering into mine. I had never seen him so captivated. How long had he been standing there?

Your voice is beautiful...

His words ring in my ears and I can't help the faint pink rising on my neck. Cardan Greenbriar had complimented me; that was a first. I was surprised he didn't make fun of me just like he has been since the day I set foot into school. He didn't mock me as he usually would, seeing my emotional outburst. This was Cardan Greenbriar, the most spoiled rich kid who never gave a fuck about anyone.

I had never once let anyone past my defenses, not even my family, foster or not. No one knew about this small world of mine and I liked to keep it that way. That is, until today when I saw a pair of iridescent coal black eyes bewitching me into wanting to tell him everything about this tiny world I had created where I would doze off to whenever I wished. That was when reality hit me and I was reminded of why I had lived in an armour for so long, why I had never let anyone get close to me.

I snap out of my thoughts when Cardan interrupts, "Like what you see, huh?". I scoff and I didn't realize I had been staring at him as he further added, "Should we get on with the project or are you gonna stand there all day, thinking about me?"

"Asshole. You wish", I snap right back at him and he lets out a soft laugh as I go through his notes.

We had agreed on double-checking each other's notes before we started the project, and by the looks of it, we had a lot of work to do. Surprisingly, Cardan's notes were not only correct and authentic, they were thorough and much more organized than mine. He had even used fancy words like serendipity- I mean what does that even mean?

"Jude, I think some of your notes are missing", he says raising his black brows and a book with torn pages.

"Oh, yeah. The torn notes are in a green file right over there", I gesture to the stack of books behind him as he leans over to find it only to frustrate me further when he says, "Uh, Jude. There is no file here".

"It should be there. It cannot go anywhere", I stand up and walk towards the mountain of books.

That was when I realized my foot is asleep and I stumble over a book, covering my face with my hands, ready for impact. Only I don't hit the ground; instead I feel arms slide around my waist and when I remove my hands from my face, the first thing I see are Cardan's eyes partially covered by his black locks.

I almost get lost in the moment. The world stops when he runs his hand through his hair as if he is nervous and he stares back at me. That is, until I remember who he is.

Ughhh....

"Looks like you're falling for me, Jude", he teases.

I abruptly push him off of me and start looking for the notes. Despite my foot still being asleep, I try to walk as if nothing happened but the bastard still notices.

"Here. Let me help you", he reaches for my hand but I stop him with a gesture and he does.

Looks like my defiance all these years really did have an effect on him.

"If you want to help, start by looking for a green file. It is unlabeled, no fancy decorations what so ever"

"What else to expect from the boring Jude Duarte"

"Well, at least I am not like one of those stupid girls who are so easily charmed by you"

"Did you just say I am charming?"

"Fuck off"

"Okay, okay", he raises his arms in defeat and I go to my room to look for the file. My eyes shift to the scattered notes over my bed and my dressing and my carpet.

Shit.

This is going to take longer than I thought.

Cardan POV

As I search through her notes, my thoughts keep drifting to the moment I had her in my arms, her body fitting right into my hands. I battled with the urge to get lost in her deep brown eyes or to drop a kiss on her cute nose.

No, no, no. Stop.

Wine. I needed wine. I needed wine right now.

Jude hated me and I should hate her. She was the one person who had refused to let me get my way and would continue to do so. She could never want someone like me, let alone love. This was just a project and as soon as it would finish, we would go our separate ways.

And yet, I cannot help but think about her all the time.

Jude POV

I return to the lounge drenched in sweat, panting and gasping for air. I had been rummaging in my room for the past hour and had finally found that file.

I slam the file onto Cardan's face and he doesn't dare reply when he sees my tired state. I sink into the sofa, one hand covering my eyes the other blindly searching for the glass of water on the front table.

"What happened to you?", Cardan asks as I open my eyes to find him completely shocked but instead of answering him, I gesture towards the file while gulping down my third glass of water.

"Let's continue. I don't want to waste any more time", my voice is dry as I open my laptop to start typing in the outline and he continues to examine my notes.

"God, your handwriting is horrible", his voice is filled with surprise as he brings one of the papers closer to those haunting, dazzling eyes to get a better look but gives in and throws it back onto the table.

"If you can't read it, why don't you make me something to eat instead?", I say robotically while looking at my screen and had not expected him to actually go to the kitchen in search for food.

My eyebrows furrow together as I walk up to him and say, "I was joking! Come on, we gotta get this done"

"I know you were joking and I know we have to this done but I am hungry and if you are not going to ask me then I am going to make myself", he complains as he looks around, opening cabinets and drawers.

"I didn't know you could cook", I say clearly perplexed by his actions.

"There are many things you do not know about me, Duarte", he continues his search and when I have had enough of his noise I say, "Stop! Okay, stop making noise! God, it's like raising a child or something", I grab the spatula from his hands but he takes it back saying, "Well, I am hungry and I can't work when I am hungry and by looking at you, you should be too"

As much as I would hate to admit it, I was hungry and I felt like I hadn't eaten in ages.

"Fine, you cook and I am going to take a break and watch some Netflix", I say right before telling him about where I keep the food and where the utensils are.

"One more question. Should I make sandwiches or hotdogs?"

"Lilliver usually does the cooking so, whatever you want", I turn on the television and continue to watch Shadow and Bone, each episode more intriguing than the last.

I hadn't realized an hour had passed when Cardan came with sandwiches.

The room is suddenly filled with the smell of freshly made sandwiches and that does nothing to satiate my hunger as I reach out for the dish set in front of me but Cardan quickly grabs the dish before I can get my hands on a sandwich.

"Patience is a virtue, dear Jude", Cardan says raising a long slender finger in the air.

"First of all, never and I mean NEVER call me dear", I glare at him as I grab the dish back, careful not to break it, "And you took so long making sandwiches that I got hungry"

I take a bite of the sandwich and if I am being honest, I had never tasted such sandwiches in my life and Cardan must have noticed me and my increasing craving for his delicious sandwiches that only seemed to make my hunger more insatiable when he said, "Either you like them", he gestured towards the half-bitten sandwich and its cheese dripping from the side of my mouth, "or you haven't eaten all day"

"Hmm. Yeah, I think it is the latter", I lie through my teeth with ease as I take a second one into my mouth.

I would never compliment him to his face, especially since I don't want him spreading the story in school.

"Why are you acting like this?", I ask out of nowhere before I can even process what I just said out loud.

"Like what?", he asks dumfounded

"I don't know, you seem a bit more... tolerable, I guess", my voice almost drops to a whisper as I stare at my third sandwich, suddenly looking for something more interesting in a piece of food that would soon be in my mouth.

He doesn't answer but I am able to see his mood shift as his body language completely changes and his muscles become more stiff. His pupils become dilated and he looks every bit as horrifying as he did when he once threw dust into my food after I had punched him.

All of a sudden, I regret what I had said and cursed my stupid mouth for opening itself.

We don't speak to each other for the rest of the night and though I hated Cardan with all that I had, one small part of me felt that there was more to this person, that he was more than just a bully and that I had missed an opportunity to get to know the real him.

Let me know if you wanna be tagged! Also, I will now on follow a policy of following back those who follow me, just to spread a bit of kindness!!

Taglist: @wanderingpages​ @thatrandomfangirlll​ @slightlyrebelliouswriter23​ @acourtofhearts @aelin-queen-of-terrasen @aesthetics-11 @angelpaulene @annihliation @anyaskywalker23 @ashlightgrayson @augustintodarkness @awkward-avacado-s @babycardan @beholdyourqueen1 @booklover-sleeplover @booksandothersecrets @booksofthemoon @b00kworm @cabeswater-and-camaros @cardaans @cardan-greenbriar-tcp @cardanslittletail @cardanstrickytail @courtofjurdan @feysand-babies @firestarsandseneschals @fizziefaerie  @highladyofthefangirlcourt @highqueenjudeduarte @hizqueen4life @hoegreenbrair @hopefullyanauthor @hurema @iammissstark  @im-wintermelody @iminsanenotobsessed @ireallyshouldsleeprn @jessacarstairs @judiecardan @junipersuns@jurdanhell @justtryintolivemybestlife @jyoti96 @katexrenee @katsemkitgostadetog @kevin-day-is-bi @kingandfireheart @kittkatandbooboo @knifewifejude @lady-thea-of-narnia @larrysaturn @leaff-life @lemon-check @life-in-black-lines @lifeminuspickles @livelovereading123 @localgoof @lordoftermites @greenbriarxrose @queenofbunnies13 @fanficreader435 @nightspeckle @thewickedkings @the-cruel-prince-cardan @myqueenjudeduarte @florafey

[ashyblondwaves]

Not sure how angsty this is as a prompt, but I'd been thinking about how much human culture and socialization is built around food and how Vision might have some angst surrounding his inability to fully participate in it.

So I decided to combine this with a little something for Vision for Father's Day. Why this one stood out to me as being for Father's Day, I really don't know but here we are! It's just a quick little something to celebrate dad!Vision and remind him that his kids adore him no matter what.

Outnumbered: Father's Day

Vision's systems rebooted, sight structures initializing. When they came online he noticed the absence of Wanda and Florence immediately. Wanda wasn't in bed and Florence's bassinet next to the bed was empty. He pulled himself out of bed and shrugged into his bathrobe, leaving the bedroom in a hurry. It wasn't like him to idle longer than the rest of the family had been asleep, and it felt curious to wake up in silence. As he passed they boy's room, he took a peek in; also empty.

It was when he foot hit the landing of the stairs that he heard the familiar morning sounds he'd grown accustomed to over the last two years. Plates clanged, babies babbled and there was a rhythmic banging that Vision couldn't quite place, and it wasn't until he entered the kitchen that he was able to identify it. Tommy, a wooden spoon clutched in his fat toddler hand, banged on the tray of his highchair like it was his own personal drum as Billy sang in the identical highchair next to him. Wanda, with Florence wrapped up against her chest, buttered toast at the counter.

"Darling, you should save your back and put Florence in her highchair, as well," Vision said, causing Wanda to look up from her task as he plucked Florence from the confines of fabric wrapped around her and placed a kiss on Wanda's lips. "She is almost 9 months old now, after all."

Wanda smiled, shimmying out of the baby wearing contraption and setting it down on the counter out of the way.

"Boys?" Wanda said, turning to the toddlers in their highchairs. "Remember what we practiced? Say, HAPPY.."

"HAPPY!" The boys repeated in unison.

"FATHER'S..."

"FAV-URRS!"

"DAY..."

"DAY!"

"Thank you, lads," Vision smiled, kissing the tops of their heads and sitting down in front of the two highchairs. He placed Florence on his knee. "Are you hungry?"

The boys nodded just as Wanda swooped in and set their plates in front of them. Eggs, toast and bacon. Tiny fingers pinched pieces of toast and eggs from their plates and ate them, chewing slowly. Billy grabbed a piece of toast, stretching his butter coated fingers toward Vision.

They played this game daily. One boy would offer food to Vision and he'd take it, thanking them for the tiny piece of food as he popped it into his mouth and chewed for just a short time before Wanda would save the day by handing him a napkin to spit the offending morsel into when they boys weren't looking. It didn't matter than he couldn't eat; when a toddler offers you food, you take it.

"When do you think they're going to realize I've been lying to them their whole lives?" Vision asked, handing the dirty napkin to Wanda who threw it in the trash for him.

"What do you mean lying to them?" Wanda asked, sitting down at the table with her own breakfast. "You're entertaining them. There's a difference."

"Not when I can't eat," Vision replied, bouncing Florence on his knee. "So much of the human experience is centered around food and yet, it's not something I'll ever be able to experience."

"Vision," Wanda started, narrowing her eyes at him. "How many times before have you thought there were things you couldn't do and one day, you could? You're constantly evolving, your systems are becoming more advanced daily. Helen makes sure of that. One day, you might..."

"But what if that never happens?" Vision asked. "We know Miss Cho is doing a lot for me -- has done a lot for me -- but this is a little more than a system upgrade."

"Never say never," Wanda said encouragingly.

"I won't," Vision said, looking back at the boys. "But these two? I can't even make S'Mores with them if we go camping."

"You can make S'Mores," Wanda corrected. "You just can't eat them. Vision, stop denying yourself experiences because a small part of it isn't exactly how you're imagining it to be."

"And what will the kids think when they get older?" Vision asked. "Dad can't eat. What's wrong with him?"

"The kids adore you, Vis," Wanda said. "They won't think any less of you because you can't enjoy an ice cream cone with them -- which you tried and hated, if you remember -- or can't eat a S'More in front of a campfire. They'll remember you taking them camping and building them that fire, not that fact that you didn't eat anything."

"Sometimes I just wish...."

"Vis," Wanda said sternly. "It's Father's Day. Let's not do this today. The kids love you, I love you and we want to celebrate you today. Are we still going to the aquarium?"

"Of course, darling," Vision smiled. He looked down at Florence on his knee and then up at the boys in their highchairs and knew Wanda was right. The kids didn't care that he was different. It was him that cared. "I shouldn't project my feelings about myself onto the children. Let's enjoy the day. What do you say, kids? Shall we go see some fishies?"

"FISHIES!" Tommy chirped, squeezing the life out of a handful of scrambled eggs. They ran down his fist and onto his tray. "FISHIES, FISHIES!"

"Go Bye-Bye!" Billy added as Florence started waving at Billy.

"Alright," Vision laughed at the chaos that three kids under three brought to his life. "Let's finish breakfast and we can get ready for Bye Bye."

The boys dutifully ate their breakfast as Wanda finally brought out Florence's highchair, setting it next to the boys chairs. Vision plopped her into the chair, buckling her in while Wanda grabbed the pureed baby food from the fridge and added small pieces of toast to her tray. He looked at his children, now all three in highchairs and growing up quicker than he'd ever imagined they would.

Sure, his life may be chaos with three small children but it's a chaos he wouldn't trade for anything in the world.

[imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl]

Californian Dream (Pt. 05 of 11)

Pairing: Billy Hargrove X Reader

Word count: 3 K

Summary: Being part of one of the richest families of California doesn't mean you're happy. Your life is boring, and you're surrounded by meaningless people and their meaningless talk. Even during Summer, with the break you have from college, there's nothing good going on. Nothing but the new pool guy, Billy, the most handsome man you ever saw. You were successfully avoiding him, not wanting to act like an idiot in front of the guy until Billy accepts to be your date for a fancy gala you're forced to attend. The night was going well, even better when he sneaked you out to go to the beach. But a gang of criminals breaks into the party, kidnapping the heirs to the wealthiest families, which includes you. So, for your safety, your parents want you to stay with Billy, living in his apartment until the criminals are caught. And that could take weeks, maybe even months.

Warnings: Light violence

<- Previous part (04)

Next part (06) ->

{Stranger Things Masterlist}

{Dacre Montgomery Masterlist}

×

Rebel

On the next morning, you're still feeling a little anxious, afraid of what he said last night was just to keep you from moving out. But, since you were sleeping on the couch, you woke up just when he was leaving for work, and you were so relieved when he didn't just say ‘good morning’ and left. He asked if you slept well, and said that you can try and sleep a little more on the bed now. It's just a little thing, but it's different from before. And you hope it lasts. You also got the chance to tell him not to bring anything for dinner. He has been spending too much money with that, so you told him you'd cook something yourself.

And that's what you doing now. The chicken breasts are in the oven, almost ready and you focus on finishing the potato salad, adding mayo, a drizzle of olive oil, and seasoning it, mixing everything together. You're happy with what you could come up with, and it did help you pass the time since there's nothing to do here other then watch the news, and that only makes you anxious. After checking the chicken once again, you sit on the table, pinning your hair up on a ponytail, and that's when Billy comes back, your eyes immediately finding him on the door as he closes it shut.

“Hey.” You mumble, running your fingers through the ponytail. For the first time, you notice the uniform he has to use. A nice, black polo shirt with the logo of the company on the left side. On all of those days, you were avoiding looking at him, since he seemed like he didn't want anything to do with you. “You look like such a good boy in this shirt.” You know he doesn't usually wear stuff like that. Billy doesn't know it, but you went through his wardrobe a couple of times, and there is nothing like that that shirt in it.

“That's company policy.” He sounds a little annoyed, and you can tell he doesn't like to wear it. “It smells nice in here. What are you doing?”

“Lemon roasted chicken with potato salad.” You gesture at the oven. “It's almost done.”

“You... Can cook?” Furrowing his eyebrows, Billy comes near the table, giving the oven a look. “Like, actually cook?”

You get what he means. The girls don't usually know how to cook since they'll always have someone to do that for them. “Well, in my house, my parents always choose what we'll have for the meals. So I figured out if I wanted something different, I'd have to cook it myself.” Shrugging your shoulders, you stand up to check the oven again. “So Amelia taught me everything I know.”

“You're a box full of surprises,” Billy mutters, so low it makes you wonder if he wanted you to hear it. “I'll shower. If you wait we can eat together.”

“If it's not in an uncomfortable silence, I'll accept the invitation.” Leaning on the countertop, you give him a look.

“Good.” He stands there for a few seconds before moving away, and you can't help but try to understand why he always does that. It feels like he wants to say something, but he never does.

You patiently wait, and when he comes back, hair still damp, you both serve yourselves and take the usual seats on the table, across from each other. Billy takes a look at his place and squints his eyes, right before staring at you. “(Y/N)?”

“Huh?”

“Where did you get these peas?”

You didn't think he'd notice. “Uhm... There's a nice grocery store just around the corner.” It sounds like a question, but before he can say anything you raise a hand. “I know, I know. But I do look different and I borrowed your sunglasses just to be sure. I didn't speak to anyone... Well, I did chat with this old lady, but that was it.”

“You gotta be careful. I know it's far from your neighborhood, but even so.”

“I was careful, I just... It sucks being in here all day doing absolutely nothing.” You didn't want to rant about it, but it just comes out. “And, inevitably, I will watch the news channel.” Then, you're not hungry anymore... Despite skipping lunch again.

“Did they find anything yet?” Silently, you just shake your head no, deciding to push the food in, even though the heavy sensation on your stomach. “Sorry.”

“Don't apologize, it's not your fault.”

Then the silence hits again, and it goes on for way too long for your taste, a leg bouncing nervously. “It's really good, by the way. Much better than what I can come up with.”

“Thanks,” you mutter with a smile.

“I've been meaning to tell you. I usually go to the gym with some friends a couple of times a week. I've been coming straight back because–”

“No, no. Please, go. I don't want to mess with your routine. More than I already did.” Reassuring him, you feel relieved when he nods. “Oh, you mentioned something about college. What do you study?”

“Marine Biology.”

“That's so cool.” You exclaim, imagining what Billy could work with. California has a lot of opportunities for marine biologists. “I bet it's amazing.”

“It is. What about you?”

“It's not that cool.” Warning him, you can't help but feel bored just to think about it. “Law. At Cali's Elite Academy, obviously.”

“It doesn't sound like you enjoy it very much.”

“I don't.”

“Then why do you do it?” As he speaks, Billy moves to the fridge, muttering something when he opens it. And you know why. “You also bought soda.”

“Yup.” Turning towards him, you take the can he offers you, cracking it open and taking a sip. “You know why I do it. Mom wanted me to, father is a lawyer already, so you get the picture.”

“I hope to be around on the day you decide you had enough of this shit and rebel against everyone who tells you what to do,” Billy says as he goes back to his chair, his eyes focused on you. Sometimes it feels his eyes can see right through you, even the parts you try to hide from yourself. The places you rather keep secret, locked deep inside. He also brings to life things you didn't even know existed. A true need to break free from everything you can't take anymore, everything that has been drowning you, suffocating you.

“Maybe it won't happen.” You burst out, pushing your plate away, still half full. “You said it yourself on the night I came here. I'll probably just slip into anything my mother wants me to do and be as frustrated as she is. With nothing in life but some millions in the bank.” There's a lump in your throat, a cry you're holding back. You don't want to be like your mother. Or like anyone else from her circle. But would you be able to shake this away? You're so used to doing this, avoiding conflicts and being the good, obedient daughter... Could you be more?

“Don't you remember what you said after?” Billy leans forward, elbows on the table, those ocean blue eyes burning through your skin. “That you'd leave California before she forced you into being another stupid girl pushed into a loveless marriage just to add up to the family's fortune.”

“I remember.” Whispering, you look down at your hands, hoping he can't see your teary eyes. “I get brave when I'm sleepy, that's why I say those things but... I'm not sure I'd be brave enough to just leave like that.”

“I came back here a year ago. My father forced me to move to Hawkins, Indiana, a dipshit small town that I hated more than anything.” His words and the weight behind them makes you raise your eyes again, meeting his stare. Billy never told you anything about his past, and you want to hear it. “I have no good memories of that place, and the moment I turned eighteen and got my High School diploma, I got into my car and left.” There's power in him, courage. You know there's more to the story, but you won't push him into sharing it if he doesn't want to. But you can picture it, Billy running away from somewhere he hated, hitting the road and leaving it all behind. You're mesmerized by it, you're not sure why. “And I came back here. I came back home.”

“California never felt like home to me.” That you remember saying. “I... I really wish I had a place where I could feel–”

“Free?” Billy finishes off for you, and you nod. “I don't think California is the problem. I think–”

“Me. I'm the problem.” Crossing your arms, you sigh. You have no idea why you're telling him all this, or how he so skillfully stormed through your walls, but you feel like Billy is the only person who can understand. Who won't think you're stupid or crazy. “I feel so... Lonely and desolated, even when I'm in my bedroom. I feel better when I'm at the beach, all alone than when I'm in the comfort of my bed. I know it's insane, but it just... It's just what it is. Of course I wish I could run away like you, but maybe I can't.”

“It's not from California you have to run away, it's from this person you pretend to be just to please everyone.” Billy stands up, taking both your plates and moving to the sink. But you stay there, motionless, thinking how you could do that.

“Tell me how and I'll do it.”

“Be the girl you were at the party.” He says, and you decide to stand up as well to help him with the dishes... But also because you want to be near him as if he's the only one who could help you do this. What exactly, you don't know. But Billy was brave enough to do something you wish you could. “The girl who doesn't care if her company is just the pool guy, who doesn't care if she almost hits a waiter, and doesn't mind having to suck some chocolate off her thumb.” Billy glances at you, and you start taking the dishes and drying them with a dishcloth. “The girl who ran from a very important beneficial gala and was very happy about it.”

“Yeah, but if you weren't there, I would never do that.”

“I might have given you a little push, but you made the decision.”

You'd never take Billy for the guy who would say these things. By what people told you about his behavior, you'd never think he'd be this... Kind. “Are you always this nice with girls?” Trying to light up the mood after the emotional conversation, you ask him, chuckling.

“No, I'm not.” He passes you the last fork, and you dry it and put it on the drawer. “Definitely not.”

“I get it.” Lying the dishcloth down, you shrug your shoulders. “Guess some girls like the bad boy.”

Billy giggles, taking the dishcloth to dry his hands. “What about you? Good boy or bad boy?”

“A guy like you would be nice.” Wait. What? It takes a couple of seconds for you to process what you just said, and what it means. “Uhm... I'll... I'll organize some of my stuff.” You quickly manage to say, turning your back at him and leaving the kitchen.

When you reach the bedroom, you shut the door behind your back, wondering what the hell just happened to you. It's completely out of question to start liking Billy. You're literally living with him for who knows how long, it would complicate things to such a high level that you would really have to move out. You're already too lucky he doesn't bring girls here, but out there... Suddenly, the names Gisele gave you start flashing through your mind, and you groan, throwing yourself on the bed.

“Don't be stupid.” You mutter, pulling the sheets over your head and expecting a calm, dreamless night.

• • •

Before, you were anxious. Worried. Now, you're just angry. Another week has passed, and nobody knows anything. A bunch of people were abducted, in huge black vans, and nobody knows where they went. It's plain stupid by now. You're already up when Billy opens the bedroom door to shower and change for the day, and you move to the living room, putting on the news channel again and letting yourself fall on the couch. The boredom won't help either. Besides going to the grocery store, you're locked in here, doing absolutely nothing other than housework.

You're by the window when Billy comes out, already in the company uniform. Turning around with your arms crossed, you stare at him. “We gotta talk because I'm losing my mind.”

“Does it has to be now? Because if I don't leave in five minutes I'll be late.”

Then, the best idea you ever had in days comes to your mind. “Take me with you.”

“What?” He bursts out, eyebrows furrowed.

“Take me with you. Where are you going today?”

“William's. The mansion by the cliff.”

“They don't know me very much, my parents hate them. Please, take me with you. I can't stand being in here all day.” Walking over him, you grab his hand. “C'mon, Billy. I can help with something.”

“I don't think it's a good idea.” He looks down at you, a thoughtful expression on his face. “If anyone recognizes you it could be dangerous. Everyone thinks you were taken too.”

“See? Nobody will hope to see me hanging around.”

“(Y/N)...”

“I swear to God if you don't take me I'll head to the beach and stay there until sunset.” It wasn't a plan, but now it is. Stepping back, with both your hands on your hips, you wait for Billy's reaction.

“Is it a threat?”

“I don't make threats, only promises.” Shrugging your shoulders, you cross your arms. “So?”

“You have three minutes to change out of these sweatpants.” He's still speaking when you're moving, quickly taking your pj's off and putting the first thing you find. Short jeans and a black T-shirt that's a little bit similar to Billy's. Not so much, but it's the best you can do.

When you're back in the living room, dramatically putting Billy's sunglasses on, you rush through the door when he opens it, more than eager to spend the day somewhere other than in the apartment.

And, as if on purpose, Billy takes one of the most beautiful roads of California. At least in your opinion. On your side, you can see the ocean, and since the waves here are more violent, the beach is empty, except for some surfers. Billy has the windows open, and the wind messes with your hair. But you like it. Closing your eyes, you stretch your arm out, feeling the wind brushing in between your fingers. Maybe it's the speed, or the daylight, or the fact that you're finally outside after weeks of confinement. Maybe it's the company... But this feels good. Almost overwhelming. There's a smile on your face that doesn't look like it's leaving anytime soon, and for the first time in... Since you can remember, you have no worries. You allowed the wind to carry them all away.

“I forgot how beautiful this place is.” You tell Billy, holding your hair out of your face so you can look at him.

“Beautiful.” He says, his eyes on you instead of on the ocean outside the window. You squint your eyes, just about to ask what he's looking at when he clears his throat, eyes on the road again. “But we're almost there. Look.”

Some miles away you see the William's house. Huge, way bigger than yours, built by the cliff, which gives them an amazing view of the ocean.

A few minutes later, you're being guided inside by one of their employees. There's nobody home, and by what the old man said, they'll only be back by nightfall, when you and Billy will be far away. So there's no danger. You're taken to the pool, and Billy starts moving around.

“What do I do?” You ask, taking a look at the enormous pool. It's so big it has an isle in the middle. The last time you came here, you were a kid, and you didn't remember it to be so big.

“I'll start with emptying the pool skimmer.” He looks around and then points at the skimmer net. “Think you can get rid of those leaves floating?”

“Yup.” Moving to get the skimmer, you start with your task.

As you move around the pool, catching the leaves and placing them on a plastic canvas Billy lied on the deck, you notice him giving you a few glances. But you only know that because you're also staring every now and then, as he comes and goes from the supply closet. Soon enough, you get so nervous about it that you can't help but giggle as you walk to the plastic canvas, dropping some more brown leaves on it. Since he's coming your way, you wait there, using the pole to sustain some of your weight, your free hand on your hip.

“Getting tired, princess?” Billy mutters in a mocking tone, and you roll your eyes. “Still half of the pool to clean.”

There's that pet name again, and at the very mention of it, you feel something on your stomach, like tickles. “I'm alright so far.” You mumble, hoping you're not blushing. As soon as he walks by, you resume your task.

The truth is that you're very tired already, and the skimmer is heavy. And the wind starts blowing the leaves all around, which makes you walk around the pool too many times. It's past 1 pm when Billy is over, and you decide not to get the four leaves left in the water.

“Let's go.” He says, and you get up from the wooden bench you've been seated for the last five minutes after he locked the supply closet, following him.

“I'm starving.” You mumble, letting your hair down from the ponytail as you get into the car again. “Where do you usually have lunch?”

“In a restaurant associated with the company. Which means employees don't pay.” He glances at you. “And I guess you didn't bring any money, so...”

“I would have if you told me that.” Pulling the door close, you take a deep breath. “Just buy me an ice cream and I'll be fine.”

“Absolutely not.”

“I'm fine. You did the hard work.” You buckle up when he speeds away, once again hitting the road. Closing your eyes, you take a deep breath when you feel the fresh wind on your face. “What are you doing next?”

“Got a fancy car to fix.”

“Uhm...” Opening your eyes again, you look at Billy's side, taking in the beach. It's completely empty now. But your eyes wander to Billy. In this perfect light, he looks amazing. Breathtaking. His grip on the wheel is loose, and he has a hand out the window, looking carefree. Billy loves this place, you can see it on his eyes, on his posture. He's home. “Do you think we have a few minutes to spare?”

“What for?”

“I just wanted to take a walk on the beach. But it's ok if you can't.” Looking away, you focus on the road ahead. But Billy is slowing down, pulling over to the side of the road. Biting your lip, you wait for him to stop before stepping out of the car. You're already crossing the road when you notice Billy is still in the car. So you stop, turning to look at him from the middle of the road. “Hey! Aren't you coming?”

“It sounded like you wanted some alone time.”

“I had plenty of alone time in the apartment.” Rolling your eyes, you gesture for him to come. “Let's go.” Reaching out your hand, you smile when he leaves the car, patiently waiting for him. You were just about to put your hand away when he takes it, rushing you to move since there was a car coming that you didn't see. It makes you giggle a little, your other hand coming to hold on to his forearm. “Seriously, you have to stop saving my life.”

“Then stop putting your life in danger.” It takes a little too long for him to let go of your hand, your fingers brushing against each other.

“I'll try.” When you get to the edge of the road, you don't see any steps leading to the sand. Only a rock that someone placed here to offer some help, but it's still a little too high for you. “Isn't it a buzz killer?”

“I'll help you.” Billy easily jumps to the sand, not even using the rock. “Come.”

“If I fall, I swear to God...” Sitting on the edge, you try calculating if you could just jump to the ground.

“You won't fall. C'mon.” Billy comes to stand right in front of you, both his arms raised to catch your fall.

Taking a deep breath, you push yourself forward, closing your eyes on the process, so you only feel when you collide with Billy. His hands are quick to hold your waist, sustaining your weight, and not allowing you to reach the ground. The sudden change makes you open your eyes, and you immediately take in how close you stand. His face is only three inches apart, and as he pulls you down, you hold tightly on his biceps. Billy's eyes are locked on yours, and even after you're safe on the ground, he doesn't move. His hands remain on your waist, his face still close enough to kiss, if only you were brave enough to stand on your toes. Your stomach feels funny, and your heart is trying to beat its way out of your chest.

But a car passing by snaps you out of it, and you both move at the same time, stepping back.

“Sorry.” You mutter, clearing your throat. “But thanks for not letting me fall.”

“I told you I wouldn't.”

×

@multific @dontxfearxthereaper @nope-thanks @nikkixostan @shinydixon @clockworkballerina @infinitelycharmed23

[estrxlar]

The Ghost Of You

22 - Plans For Later

This chapters songs:

Pretty When I Cry; Lana Del Rey

Your Teeth In My Neck; Kali Uchis

4EVER; Clairo

- E. T. perspective

I can only explain this feeling with one word, torture. Watching as he smiles down at her, holds her hand, grabs her waist all the ways I wish he did to me. Why does this always happen to me? Why is it every time I develop feelings for someone, things never go my way?

Y/n isn't easy to hate. No matter how long I stalk her social media page and find new things to ask her about, she always has an excuse, and it's never sinister enough to make Koshi hate her too.

But Koshi will never hate Y/n, and neither will I.

It's not her fault that the dummy fell in love with her. Her scent, her voice, her skin— everything about the girl is so much better than any cell in my body.

I remember the first time I met him. I was looking for a sport to get used to and found that volleyball was the most entertaining and friendly. There were limited players and not very good ones. Back then, Koshi was considered one of the best players, but his title was taken from Kageyama. I knew the instant he looked at me that I wanted him to be mine.

From time to time, Koshi would give me eyes under his lashes when we spoke, brush his hands against my back when he wanted, and do so many other things that made my heart throb. I thought that he felt the things I felt as well. That was until the week before I left Japan.

It was just the two of us in the supply closet, cleaning up after another day of practice. The light timer had just gone off and the both of us ran to reset it, making our bodies collide with each other. Unintentionally, he pressed me against the wall with both hands, breathing over my shoulder.

I was running out of time back then. I only had a week to kiss him, to talk to him, to love him. All different scenarios ran through my mind as I turned around and stared deep into what I assumed were his eyes. I had my chance to kiss him. So, I did. And he didn't resist.

He let me touch his pale cheeks with my fingers and slip my tongue through his lips. He let me press myself against his chest and whimper while I fought his tongue with mine. He even helped himself to press my hip back against the wall. My skin ran cold, wishing I could feel what was under the shirt he wore.

Did Koshi want to feel me too?

He didn't. I knew he didn't, and it was painful. I knew that no matter how much I kissed and held him, he wouldn't ever return my feelings. Koshi only kissed me for the hell of it. He was empty, as always. What made him this way? Why wasn't I ever enough to fulfill the man I love?

I shoved him away and covered my blushing face that now had tears running down it. "Koshi!" I shouted out. "Why do you do this to me?! You give me so many mixed signals even though you know you'll never love me back! Why are you torturing me this way?!"

Koshi attempted to calm me down with many gestures of hand waves and shushed, but I wailed into the darkness, crying out his name over and over again. My heart felt as if it sunk to my feet. It wasn't his fault that I fell in love with him, but blaming someone for my issues felt like the only solution at the moment.

"Why not me?! Why do you—why do you like so many girls but me? I'm here, Koshi! You know I'm in love with you yet you haven't given me any sign or hint! Is this all you wanted from me?! Was I just another girl for you to concur?"

He grabbed my shoulder and caught my attention in an instant, yelling back at me. "Eclair, I'd never do that to you! You're worth much more than someone who can't last a day in a relationship. Especially...especially someone who doesn't love you back."

It hurt so much to hear him say those words. Now that he truly does love another girl, I don't think I can handle hearing them again. Why did my relationships never work out? All I've ever wanted was to feel loved by someone. My parents don't make much of an effort. What is so good about Y/n and not I? Why couldn't he have changed his ways for me? Am I that bad?

At this point, I have no idea what to do other than stare at the bunk above mine, hearing the steady breathing coming from Y/n as she sleeps. He loves her, and not me; that was the most painful thing that I have ever realized.

-

- Y. L. Perspective

When I went to sleep, I didn't think I would wake up sweaty under the comfortable, feeling as if I had a severe fever.  I open my eyes and stare widely at the white ceiling above me, wondering if Kiyoko and Eclair were burning up as well.

'I hope I don't have to do much activity today.' I think to myself as I sit up in the top bunk. My legs dangle off of the wooden barrier that contains me from falling out.

"Hey! Eclair is taking a quick shower. Ready to cook breakfast?" Kiyoko says, grabbing onto the bedboard. She wore a lilac shirt with blue sweatpants; something comfortable to start the day.

'Guessing she didn't go through hell and back last night?' I rub my eye, nodding to the girl as she slips her phone into her back pocket. "Hey, is it just me, or was it super hot last night?" I ask.

Before leaving the room, she gives me a side-eye. "Uhm...no. But I know why you were." Her voice is filled with curiosity, telling me something wasn't right. "Last night, you seemed to have a dream of some sort. Nightmare or something more..?"

The smirk on her face is diminishing. Did I have a strange dream last night? I couldn't seem to remember. If so, I hoped I wasn't tossing and turning like a maniac.

Embarrassed, I slap my face gently, hiding my red face. "Shimizu!" I whine to her. I, unfortunately, forgot any memory of my dream last night the second I opened my eyes. There was no knowing what made me have hot flashes. "I'll meet you in the kitchen. Give me a minute to freshen up," I tell her, climbing down from the top bunk.

-

I could hear a few of the boy's voices as I roasted the vegetables on the stove, letting a smile creep up onto my face. If they were awake, that meant Koshi was getting ready as well.

I knew that Eclair's being here stopped us from being as affectionate as we would like to be, but seeing each other was all we needed to get through the day.

"Almost done, Y/n?" Kiyoko asks me from the counter as she plates the meat and rice we cooked. I nod, turning off the stove and pouring the vegetables into a bowl. The both of us pick up a few plates to take to the mess hall. Takeda was right behind us as we walked there with utensils and plates.

Kiyoko kicks the door open, revealing two tables full of hungry boys. We set down the food onto a counter for them to begin serving themselves. After carefully placing my bowl of vegetables, I turn around to glance for Sugawara.

Of course, he was already behind me. "Good morning, Y/n and Kiyoko. Thank you for cooking us breakfast," he says as friendly as possible. Though the entire volleyball team except Eclair knew we were a couple, Koshi didn't want to make a scene out of our relationship.

Shimizu rolls her eyes playfully, wafting her hand in the air. "You guys can play 'dating'. Eclairs showering so she won't be down here until another twenty minutes." Leaving the two of us in front of the serving table.

He runs his neck, smiling at me. "How'd you sleep?" Koshi asks me, lowering his voice to where only I can make it out under the noisy volleyball club. One step closer results in his body softly pressed against mine and his hand resting neatly on my shoulder, his eyes staring back into mine. At that very moment, discovering why I'd woken up so sweaty this morning wasn't any struggle.

I become red in an instant, flustered at visions of Koshi being intimate with me in my room. His facial features lit by moonlight, his lips gentle tugging on mine, his scent showering my body. Wonders about my first time would enter my mind once in a while, but I've never had such a vivid image of what it would be like. It wasn't as if I could continue fantasizing about it in the breakfast line.

"Y/n...are you good?" Koshi squeezes my shoulder gently, waking me from a daze. Blinking rapidly, I look away from him in shame of my perverted thoughts and nod.

"Yeah! I slept great. What about you?" A bright smile is enough to clear up any worry that he had brought upon himself. He grins back, sliding his hand from my shoulder to my wrist, fidgeting with my fingers as he spoke.

"Good, good. Although, sharing a room with eleven boys isn't very peaceful. I bet Kiyoko and Eclair let you get some rest," he says, giving us both plates to begin plating our food. I grab a few fresh vegetables and a scoop of rice, then pour myself and Koshi and cup of green tea.

He nods his head to the left, motioning for me to follow him to an empty table where we could discuss how our night went further. We sat down our plates and sat across from each other, saying our thanks.

"So! Got any ideas about what we might be doing today?" I ask him as I began eating my food.

He scoffs lightly. "Well, Daichi told me we are gonna be running for the entire morning. Then, I assume we'll be extending our skills in the gym for a while. If we have any free time, wanna sneak off somewhere and head into the small town?" He looks up at me before taking a bite of steak.

Running and training don't seem all bad on behalf of Kiyoko and me. All that meant was that we would be handing out water and towels for them; regular manager things. "Yeah! Do you think we'll get in trouble if we do?" I whisper, leaning closer to him.

For a second, he stares at me intensely, then looks to his left and right. "No, not if we don't tell anybody."

He bites his bottom lip slightly and gulps his tea. Ever before he could notice I was staring, I look down at my plate and continue eating.

It wasn't the risk of getting in trouble that scared me, but what might happen when I go out with Koshi. Perhaps being alone with him after having a dream about fucking wasn't the brightest idea. Although, I wanted so badly to spend time with him without having to refrain from any couple-like behavior.

With that in mind, I say yes to his request. "Sure thing. Got any ideas about where to go? Or more importantly, any money?" I jokingly ask, making him chuckle at me. He shakes his head gently, eying me.

"Yeah, I got money. If it's okay with you, we can hop on a few buses and wander the city." I grew eager to do exactly that. During the summer when Grimlace was invited to open for concerts, we would blow our money on cheap motels and bus bills, but always made the best memories while doing so.

Of course, I'd want to go with Koshi. And so, I smile brightly, resting my head on my hand, and looking at him while he happily ate his food. "Yeah, I'd like that." Now, our schedule didn't seem so bad. We'd be able to spend time with each other once it was clear of volleyball training.

-

Hey hey hey my bbs. Tysm for reading, I tried to make this chapter fulfilling enough to build excitement for the next one!! As always, take care of yourself. Love you and pls vote!

(Ps. I love the new comments)

- estrxlar

[frogsandfries]

I'm twenty-five. And my mother thinks she needs to dictate to me how to place my stuff.

Yesterday when I was leaving, as a "shove it up your ass" to her, I left my stuff where it was. I figured if it was in my brother's way (the only person it should've bothered all night), he would text me and move it.

My mother decided my jelly beans were in her way, y'know, all the way over where my brother decided to park himself last night. And as payment for moving them, she helped herself. She thought I wouldn't notice. But she was fucking generous to herself, even if my brother hadn't texted me, I still probably would've been like, where the fuck did all these beans go. Even if he hadn't texted me, which fucking hell no I didn't mention he did, I would've beelined for them where I left them. I still would've been suspicious of why my mother felt compelled to move them.

So I'm twenty-five. I live with my parents, mostly because I didn't get any help from them for college or getting out on my own, and partly because I keep getting myself into deadend corners. Least of anything do I want anything to do with the horrible bitch who birthed me. And I don't honestly think she stole the jelly beans I bought and paid for because I ignored her dictating to me what to do with my stuff. I'm certain she only took them because she was fucking fixated on them like a slathering, greedy.....hell-sow. She fucking stuffs food into her face obsessively and compulsively, not because she's truly hungry. Whenever someone buys something that she wants, she won't even bother to ask and there's no sense in dictating to her, no matter how small the words, simple the sentences, that she's not welcome to the comestibles. There isn't really even any use hiding it. You basically have to lock it up or lock it to your side. Because she never wanted to be a parent or whatever, so everyone owes her.

And half the time I get to thinking about it, I'm shocked that I want a kid.

I wouldn't if my head was still completely fucked by her.

And I'm fully aware that the big part of why I want a kid is to give it the childhood I wish I'd had--a mother who provided for me and was enthusiastic about being a parent. A parent who was open with me and hugged me and didn't hate me, like really, deeply, utterly resent and loathe me. A parent who never screamed. A parent who made good, healthy, hearty, nutritious food, instead of slop because she could degrade us that way and because she didn't give a shit.

The other part of why I want to raise a kid is, not only do I know I can do it better, especially if I'm not worrying about paying rent, I can't wait to watch this being that came from my own body learn and grow, and to have that chance to see the world through their eyes. I love teaching and sharing and learning. I guess it harkens back to wanting that chance to do it over, even if the roles are reversed.

But I'm not like my mother. I don't actually believe she was ever a hard worker. I believe she did whatever it took to get what she wanted from my dad. I strongly believe she's a manipulative liar and she couldn't wait to take advantage of the first excuse to not work, and be taken care of. I think she has always been self-interested, self-involved and self-centered. And I fully, immovably believe she tricked my dad, who believes she used to be willing to work hard.

I'm nothing like her. I don't know if my sister took too many lessons from our mother, or if she just got into an awkward situation, but my sister is shaping up to be too much like that woman. I don't have anyone taking care of me and my obligations. I need my driver's license and I need to finish my van before I can go trying to have a kid. And then I intend to be the mother I never had. Every day, I go to work to try to get my shit put back together because no one is taking care of me and I don't need to be taken care of. If I've taken care of another adult, and I can goddamned well take care of myself, I can support my own family and my studio practice.

I see enough of that horrible monstrous woman in the mirror every time I look at myself to remind myself of what and who I need to be.