#I guess this is meant to take place one of the nights when the player their partner and grovyle are getting ready to go to dialga’s tower

[rocksinmuffin]

Hi, could you do Grovyle from MD? I will accept anything you're willing to give me. I am but a mere orphan child hoping to receive some sustenance of that man

Grovyle has trouble sleeping.

He always has. It’s not going to change just because he can finally hear the roar of the wind or the crash of the waves along the rocks below. This world is so alive but it gives him little relief. It only strengthens his resolve to save it. Makes him feel restless because every second not spent working towards a better future is a second closer to the ruined timeline he knows.

You, on the other hand, seem to have no trouble falling asleep now. You look so peaceful, curled up in a nest of dried grasses, expression soft and chest rising and falling in a gentle rhythm. It’s a stark difference from the restless sleeping form he remembers and not just because you are no longer human.

This new form suits you, Grovyle thinks. You’ve always had a fire burning deep within you. It burned bright in your eyes even when everything else around you was dark and cold and dead. Now that fire burns inside and out, manifesting in the form of powers you didn’t have as a human. It’s good, Grovyle decides. Strength suits you. Though it’s weird that he has to look down to meet your eyes instead of craning his neck up.

He wonders if you would miss anything from your old life if you could remember it. Not the world itself, obviously, because the two of you had resolved to change it, but maybe some of the little things. Would you miss being human? Would you miss your height? Your hair? Your fingers? Your lips? Would you miss your friends? Would you miss Celebi? Would you miss…? …no, it’s better not to follow that train of thought.

Would you miss him? He strikes the thought from the record but he thinks it anyway. Do you miss him like he misses you?

Grovyle thinks you look happy here. Much happier with your new partner than you ever were with him. He’s not jealous, not really. He’s glad you found someone. He’s relieved to know you weren’t alone all this time because even as he’s spent every second working to fulfill your mission, not a moment went by when he wasn’t thinking of you. So, yes, he is deeply grateful to your new partner for being there for you even though it hurts to know how easily he can be replaced.

It hurts to know how forgettable he is. And that’s not fair of him to be upset at you for that. You’re the victim, you lost everything, but did you really have to forget him too?

He takes a sharp inhale of breath and closes his eyes. He keeps them closed even as the deep ache in his chest passes. He listens to the wind and the waves, concentrating on the sounds of the beautiful world he is fighting to protect.

Your gentle breathing is the last thing he remembers before sleep finally claims him.

[azulpitlane]

i wish you would I ln4

pairings: lando norris x reader, exbf! mason mount x reader summary: part two of got love struck notes: kinda dragged making this but finals are finally over so send me some requests pls🤸‍♀️ this ones kinda angsty and there's lots of miscommunication sorry hehe part three, masterlist

yourusername posted a story 2h ago

The night was full of partying, drinking and dancing as you celebrated your best friend's 23rd birthday. The night quickly turned into a mess when you went to the bar to get everyone more drinks. When you came back your friends were nowhere to be seen, you assumed they were in the dance floor but when you went to check, they weren't there either. To make matters worse, you had put your phone in your friend's purse for safe keeping so you had no way to contact them. The panic quickly sobered you up as you looked everywhere for them but instead you found different a familiar face.

"Mason?"

"Y/n! Hey, I didn't realize you were here."

Your ex-boyfriend went for a hug as he greeted you. You and Mason ended your relationship over a year ago, and though you felt no animosity towards the football player, the breakup had been hard as everybody on the internet seemed to have an opinion on it. It was mutual breakup, you both were in different stages in your life and it just seemed like it wasn't your time.

"Yeah, I was celebrating y/bff/n's birthday with a few other girls, but I have no idea where they are and they have my cell." You were starting to get frustrated as you felt like they left without you.

"Oh no, I would help you look but I'm about to head out. Let me give you a ride home, I would hate for you to be here by yourself."

You knew if somebody saw you and Mason alone it would cause chaos all over again, but you had no other choice at the moment and you just wanted to go to bed. You agreed and as you left you both were oblivious to the cameras taking pictures of you leaving through the back door together.

As you pulled up to your hotel you smiled at Mason and thanked him.

"You're a lifesaver Mase seriously, I don't know what I would've done if I never found them or you."

"You don't have to thank me y/n. I will always look out for you even if we're broken up. I still care for you."

"You're a great friend, I'll always look out for you too."

"And um I have to ask,"

You could tell he was nervous as he scratched the back of his neck and his cheeks flushed slightly.

"What is it Mase?"

"Do you love him?"

You were surprised by the question, not expecting him to bring up Lando.

"Um yeah-yes. I love him so much, I can't even find the words to describe it to be honest. I don't think any song I write can even measure to how strong my love is for him."

"That's good, yeah, that's great. I just, I'm happy you found your person y/n. You know, I thought that person would be me, but if you're happy, than I am too. I guess we just weren't meant to be."

"Mase, you're one of the most amazing people I've met, seriously. I don't think it was ever in the cards for us, but you've taught me so much and you'll always have a special place in my heart. You will find your person one day, I promise."

You smiled at Mason as you spoke, not realizing you had given him the closure he had been needing for a year.

Lando was freaking out.

He had been sent the article of you and Mason over 5 times already and you hadn't answered your phone in over 2 hours. His mind was reeling as he was thinking about what you could possibly be doing right now. Even though he trusted you more than anything, he couldn't help but let it get to him. Why aren't you answering?

He knew your phone was charged and turned on considering he can still see your location. As he checked it again, he realized you were no longer at the club. You were at someone's apartment. Why weren't you at your hotel? Who's apartment was this?

Before he let himself jump to conclusions, he called y/bff/n knowing you two went out together.

"LANDOOOO! HI."

"Y/bff/n, hey is y/n with you?"

"Y/n? Oh nooooo. Aw I miss her Lan, is she with you?"

"What? No, how could she be with me? I'm in Monaco right now."

"Oh. Then I'm not so sure."

Lando could feel himself getting frustrated as he spoke with the clearly intoxicated girl.

"Okay, did she go home with you? With anyone else?"

"I don't know, you should probably call her or something."

"I did, over 10 times in the past hour."

"Oh maybe she's busy! Let me know how it goes, bye!"

"Wait-"

She hung up. Lando was going to throw up. He was never considered himself as an insecure guy, but he couldn't help but feel there was something going on. He's seen those tweets and comments saying how much everyone loved you and Mason together. What if those comments made you realize they were right? What if you were with Mason right now? Lando wanted to cry, scream and throw up all at once.

Three loud knocks woke you up from your beauty sleep. You were still in last night's clothes as you were too tired to even change after the nights disaster. You opened the door and your best friend ran in and hugged you.

"Y/N! I'm so so sorry for leaving you all by yourself. I was completely blacked out and I guess I was acting sloppy because y/f/n said we got kicked out of the club! I was acting too drunk and they got mad im so so sorry, this is all my fault and we tried to tell security to get you but they were so mean and-"

"Y/bff/n stop. It's fine, it was your birthday, you deserved to act a little crazy."

"Still babe, I'm sorry. Now that article is being spread like crazy and it's all because of me."

"What are you talking about? What article?"

"Shit. I forgot, here's your phone. But I have to warn you, people saw you leaving the club with Mason last night and the rumors have already begun. Im sorry hun."

Oh god.

Lando🧡 15 missed calls 5 unread messages

YourPublicist 2 missed calls 1 unread message

Danny Ric🤠 2 unread messages

Y/f/n 8 unread messages

The notifications were endless as you scrolled through your phone but there was only one that you really cared about. You immediately called Lando, afraid he was angry at you for this mess.

"Lan, baby, I'm so sorry for worrying you. I just opened your messages, y/bff/n had my phone all night." You immediately gave him a run down of the night as you knew what it was like to be in his position. The media has circulated so many rumors about your relationship overnight and you knew how hard that was. You had dealt with it all throughout your career and you were heartbroken it was happening to Lando because of you.

"That's weird because I actually called y/bff/n last night and she did not mention she had your phone."

"She was so out of it last night, she probably forgot she even had it. Oh god, she was downing shots I'm honestly not even surprised she got kicked out, she was so crazy-"

"Y/n, you don't understand, I have not slept all night. I was worried and everyone is talking about this. I look like an idiot in this situation."

You knew Lando was going to be upset but after your explanation, you didn't expect for him to still be angry at you.

"I know, the night was a mess, but nothing happened with Mason. He just dropped me off and I'm grateful it was him and not some random taxi."

"You're grateful it was him? You're grateful these pictures are all over the internet?"

"That's not what I meant! I meant he was the safest option at that moment, I had nobody else."

"Yeah. Half of the internet is happy it was him. People are actually celebrating thinking you guys are back together."

"Don't listen to them Lan, me and Mase are never getting back together. People will accept it over time and this will blow over."

"Why are you being so casual about this? Do you even know how I felt last night when you weren't answering. I was going to be sick thinking what you could possibly be doing with him."

"Lan, I told you nothing happened. Why aren't you believing me?"

"This is just all too much." Lando knew he was overreacting a bit. Your story made sense and it all lined up, but he had spent the entire night overthinking and reading the rumors about you two that he couldn't get them out of his mind. He loved you so much and last night made him realize how easily he can lose you and that thought terrified him. You were everything to him, but did you really feel the same way?

"Are you breaking up with me? Seriously? Over a stupid tabloid, I can't believe this." You felt betrayed. Did he not trust you?

"I dont know, it's just hard for me wrap my head around this right now."

"Lan, my flight to Monaco leaves in a few hours, how about we just talk about this in person when our heads are clear?"

Lando was getting angrier as the call went on. He knew his insecurities were getting the best of him right now but he felt like you weren't listening to him. You were trying to brush this off when the whole world was going against you two right now.

"Wow Y/n. My heads pretty fucking clear right now. You know what? Maybe it's best if you don't come, yeah?"

"Yeah, okay."

one week later

liked by user 1, user 2, masonmount and 3,593,304 others

yourusername life atm. p.s all new music released from now on is coming from the comfort of my own bed <3

comments on this post have been limited

yourbff love u. coming over rn🏃‍♀️

yourusername pls dont forget snacks

taylorswift need this new album right now

danielricciardo ❤️‍🩹

liked by user1, user2 and 231,583 others

dailymail Singer Y/n Y/l/n spotted once again with Manchester United star, Mason Mount, leaving a restaurant with a few other football players. Are the two officially back together? Rumors of her breakup with Formula One driver, Lando Norris have been circulating for over a week now after Y/l/n and Mount were seen leaving a club together. Read more on this new love triangle in our article linked in our bio.

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user1 im so excited for this album HAHAHA

user2 team mason idc

user3 funny how the last song she dropped was titled slut, if the shoe fits :)

user4 slut shaming in 2023? disgusting.

user5 i refuse to believe her and lando broke up sorry

user6 delulu is the solulu atp😁

notes: another cliffhanger!!!🤸‍♀️also this isn't proofread at all my bad heh

tags: @jayrami3 @whoselly @roseseraj @saturnbloom77 @landowecanbewc

[riboism]

man who can’t be moved

》 pairing: j.yh x f!reader

》 genre: angst, smut, some fluff

》 content: college student!reader, college student! yunho, no strings attached, hookups, reader is kind of a player, some mentions of reader’s ex (it didn’t end well),  lots of denial, lots of emotions, big dick yunho, creampie, clit play, angry sex, am i missing anything?

》 wc: 6.4k

》 a/n: thank you to the person who requested this! this got me out of my writers block. I hope you like it :)

♫ playlist: flook- hector gachan, evergreen- omar apollo, frío- omar apollo, broken love- gemini, man who can’t be moved- the script

Yunho stood outside your apartment door, holding onto a box that contained your possessions. He could smell the rosy scent of the shampoo that you left in his shower. He had spent all morning collecting your belongings into this box, proud that he finally made an effort to be rid of you once and for all. But that rosy smell, that same scent that he’d wake up to after you spent the night was making him second guess himself. No, stop it, he said to himself. Just stick to the plan Yunho. 

The plan was simple. Yunho would go to your apartment after work and knock on your door, fully aware that you probably weren’t home. You were most likely at San’s or Yeosang’s place right now, getting shit-faced drunk and having sweaty sex on their beat-up couches, head too fuzzy in bliss to even spare a single thought about him. But he thought he would knock anyway, just as a courtesy. He’d wait for ten seconds, and when you don’t answer, he’d shrug in a “welp, I tried” kind of way before placing the box on your doorstep. He’ll take a deep breath while looking at your door that he knew all too well one last time and then head towards the stairwell exit, with his head held high, showing no intention of turning back.

Yunho was partly to blame for the way things ended, and he knew that. You made yourself very clear in the beginning. “Listen Yunho, you’re really sweet,” You said after he confessed to you all those months ago at the campus library where you two first met, “But I’m not looking for anything serious. I don’t really do relationships. You get what I mean?”

He knew exactly what you meant. ‘Dating’ was an ancient term. Nobody ‘dated’ anymore. What replaced this archaic social practice were one-night stands, situation-ships, friends with benefits, hookups, etc. No one wanted a ‘serious’ relationship anymore because that meant having to give your mind, body, and soul to someone, and why bother with all that when you can just give them one of the three? 

Even though most of his peers shared the same sentiment as you when it came to relationships, Yunho didn’t agree with it at all. Maybe he was old-fashioned for wanting something more than a quick fuck. Looking back on it now, he regretted not taking the hint. It was evident that you wanted a guy you could fool around with when you were bored, someone who’s emotionally unavailable so you don’t have to worry about attachments and sudden ‘L’ bombs when you’re just trying to get your fix. But Yunho, who was so pathetically infatuated with you at the time, so much so that it blocked away all rational thinking, decided that he’ll be whatever kind of guy you wanted him to be if it meant that he could be with you. The foolish romantic was now part of a no strings attached relationship. 

He felt incredibly stupid for getting involved with you. What did he expect? That after all the mindless sex, you’d fall as hard for him as he did for you, and finally agree to be his girlfriend? He had so much to learn. No strings attached meant no strings attached. That meant less conversation and more action. Less getting to know each other and more getting to know about what was in between your legs. It meant no longing stares, although he was guilty of watching you sleep in his arms from time to time. It also meant being okay with the fact that he was not the only guy you were seeing. And that’s when the fights would ensue.

“Who was that guy?” Yunho demanded, making sure to use his quiet-yelling voice out of respect for the other patrons of the library. He was referring to the pale, blonde-haired guy from the dining hall earlier. He didn’t like how close he was standing next to you. He especially didn’t like it when he leaned in to whisper in your ear, or how you giggled when he placed his hands over your waist and how you rubbed your hands over his flexed muscles. You chewed on your gum, tracing your fingers over the etched golden text on the book spines on the historical fiction shelf. You almost didn’t hear him at first, too preoccupied with finding your next bedtime read. 

“Hmm? Oh, that guy? Just someone I’ve been seeing. Why, you jealous?” 

It was a joke. There was no such thing as ‘jealousy’ in a no strings attached relationship. You smiled up at him, expecting to see him roll his eyes from your playful jab, but instead, he looked away from you. Even with his side profile facing you, you could read the tinge of irritation on his face. You frowned.

“Oh come on Pookie,” You pouted, squeezing his cheeks and turning his head to face you. You chuckled after seeing his lips puckered up like a fish. “Don’t be like that. Come on, I can’t be the only girl you’re seeing, right?” 

He placed his hand on your wrist and pulled you off him. “Whatever.” He moped. He watched as your eyes widened in sudden realization. 

“No…” You gasped dramatically, bringing your hand up to cover your mouth. “I’m the only one you’ve been seeing?” 

He stayed quiet, not understanding why you worded it that way. Was it really a bad thing that you were the only girl on his mind? 

“Oh god, you’re so cute!” You tittered. “I thought with a dick like yours, you’d be very popular. It’s a shame you’re not sharing it. I know a lot of girls who would love to take you out for a spin.” 

“Keep your voice down.” Yunho hissed, looking around to see if anyone heard your distasteful choice of words. Luckily, no one was around at your corner of the library. “And stop talking like that. I don’t like it when you talk about me like that.” 

“It was a compliment!” You defended yourself. Yunho refused to meet your eyes, busying himself with pulling out random books and reading the blurbs on the backside, although he was too upset to even acknowledge what he was reading. You sighed again, feeling a little bad for making him so upset. You’d often forget that Yunho was more sensitive than your other partners and that he needed extra kindness and assurance. You wrapped your arms around his big body and rested your cheek against his back. 

“Okay, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to tease you so much.” He stayed quiet, putting back the book and pulling out another. “Please don’t be mad.” You begged. 

“I’m not mad,” He murmured. “I just thought…I don’t know, I thought I was the only guy you were seeing.” 

“Does it bother you that you’re not?” You questioned, letting go of him. Yunho looked back at you, his chest tightening at your furrowed brows. He worried that he said the wrong thing again. He was new to the no strings attached community, and would often let his possessiveness and sensitivity peek through. 

“No,” He lied. “I just…Forget it.” 

You mulled over his response, trying hard to understand why he was so upset, to begin with. Your silence made Yunho nervous. Everything about you made him nervous. 

Then, your eyes sparked when you finally understood. “Ohh…I get it.” You nodded. 

His shoulders tensed up. “You do?” 

“Yes, and you have nothing to worry about. Out of everyone, you’re my favorite.” You stood on your tippy toes and gave him a quick peck on the cheek, satisfied that you solved the puzzle and were able to calm his nerves. 

Yunho gave you a shy smile. He didn’t want to smile, but he figured it was best to do so, so that you could believe that he was lashing out over the fear of being replaced, and not because he didn’t wish to share you with other guys. 

You continued on. “You worried me for a second. I thought you were one of those guys that don’t like it when a girl has a mind of her own.”

“No,” he chuckled nervously, “No, I don’t mind that at all.” 

“Good,” you chirped, going back to your search. “You wouldn’t believe some of the guys I’ve been with. They get so clingy, and it gets annoying after a while. I’m glad you’re not like that. Other guys…they don’t get it.  We’re young. It’s better we have fun while we can, or else we’ll live to regret it when we’re old and wrinkly and can’t get any.” 

Yunho hummed in agreement, although he didn’t agree with you at all. He thought about his grandparents. They lived in a small apartment just outside of the city. His parents would complain about how small their living space was, and offered to help them move into a more spacious apartment, but his grandparents always refused. “If we move into a bigger apartment, we won’t be able to see each other. This size is perfect,” His grandmother would say, “I turn around and he’s right behind me. It’s how it should be. Anything farther, and we’d miss each other too much.”

It always warmed his heart just how inseparable those two were, even in their old age. He wanted that for himself one day. How wonderful would it be to grow old with the person you love most? 

Later that night, while you were showering, he remained in your bed, thinking about what you said earlier. Was he really your favorite? Did you really like him more than the other guys you were seeing? Or was his dick just bigger than theirs? He tried not to think about that too much and focused on going to sleep.

-

And when it wasn’t him being upset with you, it was you getting annoyed with him. 

“Do you really have to go?” Yunho whined. He was sitting up on his bed, watching you as you shuffled around his room, bending down to pick up the discarded pieces of clothing. 

“I already told San I’d meet up with him later.” You huffed as you shimmied into your jeans. Yunho didn’t like how quickly you were getting dressed. It was as if you were eager to get away from him. 

“San?” He scoffed. “You mean that bartender that kept eye fucking you right in front of me?” 

Yunho remembered San. A lot of the girls from your University frequented that bar on the corner of Main Street, hoping to get served by the handsome devil in all black. He’s seen a lot of the girls write their phone numbers on the twenty-dollar bills they tipped him with. It was ridiculous. Everything about him was ridiculous, from the cheap hair gel he used to slick back his hair, to his sleazy smile, along with his overly tight t-shirts and shiny black leather pants. But he didn’t mind him too much, not until that night when you two went in for a drink, and the so-called ‘handsome devil in all black’ ruthlessly flirted with you when he was clearly sitting right next to you with his hand on your thigh to mark that you were taken. Yunho didn’t know what angered him more. San’s shit-eating grin or the fact that you let him flirt with you in the first place. 

You rolled your eyes. “Yeah, that guy.” You really didn’t like it when he got emotional, and Yunho could sense your discomfort. He immediately regretted what he said and grabbed you by your arm before you could leave, pleading to you with his eyes. 

“I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t mean to upset you. But can’t you just stay a little longer? It’s already so late. I thought you could spend the night. We could rent a movie?” He offered. 

You picked up your jacket and purse, not even bothering to put them on before you left. “Look, I’ll call you okay?” You pressed a quick kiss to his lips and then went out the door before he could protest again. Yunho slumped back against the headboard, the sound of the door slamming behind you echoing in his head. How do you keep letting this happen, Yunho? She comes and goes, that’s what she does. She’s not here to hold hands and watch a fucking movie. She wants to fuck and then move on to the next guy. Seriously, do you have any respect for yourself?

And that’s how the cycle would begin. Yunho would get tired of you and your bullshit, tired of being discarded right after helping you cum, tired of driving himself mad over who you were seeing and what you were doing with him, just tired of being an option. It wasn’t him. He wanted you and your full devotion, and when he finally realized that there was no way you would give that to him, he’d call it off. 

The first few weeks of being free from you would go well. He’d be at peace like he got rid of a bad cold and could finally breathe again. But that small period of relief wouldn’t last very long. Truth was, Yunho wasn’t good at being alone. And soon, he’d miss your touch, your smell, and hearing your laugh. He’d miss the moments he spent with you in the library, like when you two would play footsies under the table during your late-night midterm study sessions, or the times you two would fight for the aux cord in his car, eager to show each other new songs you were obsessing over at the moment. He’d find himself listening to the songs you showed him, but they didn’t sound the same anymore. 

He’d miss hearing you talk about your day or your thoughts about rent control and the current economic crisis. And then he’d miss the nights he spent with you, how your body reacted to his fingertips, the way you’d press your eyes shut when he entered you, and the pretty sounds you let out when you were close to your peak. And then he’d think about that one night you showed up at his apartment, unannounced. You were upset, it was telling from your reddened lips and tear-stained cheeks. You wouldn’t say why you were upset, and after asking a couple of times, Yunho decided to just let leave you be. He then invited you in and let you lead the way to his bed. It started the way any other night started, with you two hungrily ripping each other’s clothing off, but before he could spread your legs, you suddenly pressed your hand to his chest and asked him to stop. “No, not like this…Can we-” You looked away from his piercing gaze, a rush of frustration and confusion coursing through your stomach until you finally spit the words out. “Can we just lay here?”

Yunho looked down at you with sincerity in his eyes, and he wanted to ask you one more time what was wrong. But seeing you so hurt, so tired, so in need of someone to just hold you while you cried, he decided to hold his tongue. He pulled you into his arms without question, letting you wet his chest with your spilled tears. And when he felt goosebumps prickle up on your skin, he covered both your naked bodies with a blanket and held you tighter. You finally fell asleep, your worries being absorbed by Yunho and his warm embrace, and Yunho couldn’t help but feel a little enraptured watching you sleep so peacefully in his arms. He’s had you in every way, in every position, seen every crevice of your beautiful body, but this. This is what he wanted most in the world. This is how he wanted you. And he hoped that by the next morning, that’s how you’d want him too. But when morning came, Yunho woke up alone, with nothing but the faint smell of roses on his pillowcase. When he asked you about it later that day on campus, you suddenly went cold and demanded he never bring it up again.

He thought about that night, your body, those Omar Apollo songs you showed him, the library study sessions, just every single moment that he’s ever spent with you, driving himself mad to the point where the desire for you would be overwhelming and too strong to ignore and he’d ultimately give in and crawl back into bed with you, allowing you to use him as you wanted, feeling again like a dog on your leash. It would feel good for a bit, until those same old feelings resurfaced and he’d call it off once again, repeating the never-ending cycle of your no strings attached relationship.

But this time, things were going to be different. He wasn’t going to continue this cycle. You weren’t good for him, and it was time he let go and move on. That’s why he packed all your stuff and came to drop them off. It was official. There was no going back from this. All he had to do now was stick to the plan. 

Yunho shifted the box to his side and used his free hand to knock on the door. He took a deep breath and counted in his head. 

One. 

Two.

Three.

Four.

Five-

The door swung open, interrupting his counting. You stood at the door frame in nothing but your bathrobe, your wet hair dripping puddles around your feet. Yunho was at a loss for words. This wasn’t part of the plan. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t prepare for this. He didn’t, sorry, couldn’t see you, because it would just make things harder. It was like flaunting a cigarette in front of someone who just quit smoking. He wasn’t strong enough to resist you. He was addicted to you and he worried that he would relapse again. 

“Oh, Yunho.” You acknowledged, crossing your arms over your chest. He held onto the box tighter, feeling himself twitch from the sound of you calling his name. You peered into the box, recognizing the articles of clothing and personal hygiene products. “Is that my stuff?” 

Yunho struggled at first, forgetting for a moment how to speak coherently. “Uh- yes, it is. I came to drop them off. Here.” He blubbered, pushing the box towards you. You took it from his hands, not expecting it to be so heavy. You didn’t realize you left so many things at his place. 

“Oh. Thanks.” 

A silence weighed in between you, both of you looking at each other awkwardly, unsure of what to say next. Right, Yunho thought to himself, there’s nothing left to say. You did your part, now walk right out. 

“Well, I should head back. Goodnight, Y/N.” 

Yunho turned on his heel and made his way out of the long corridor. Part of him didn’t want to reach the end of the hall, but he pushed himself anyway, reminding himself over and over to not look back. As painful as it was, it needed to happen. It was for the best. 

“Wait,” You called after him. 

And just like that, Yunho immediately stopped in his tracks, not hesitating this time to turn around. It almost brought him some relief, like he had been holding his breath for too long, and now you finally gave him permission to exhale. “Yes?” He beamed.

You stepped out from the door frame and into the hall so you were right across from where Yunho stood. “Do you want to come in?”

“What?” He asked, dumbfounded, almost believing that he must have heard you wrong. 

“I mean, your stuff,” You clarified, “I still have some of your stuff in my apartment if you wanted to come in and grab them.” It was kind of pathetic, the way you tripped over your words, but you couldn’t bare saying goodbye just yet. No, you’re not catching feelings, you assured yourself. You just wanted him around you for a little bit longer. Maybe it was selfish of you to keep pulling on his leash like this, but for the moment, you didn’t care. 

“Oh, right. That would be great, actually.” 

-

Yunho knew he would hate himself for letting this happen. All that progress getting chucked out the window on account of his lack of self-control. But how could you blame him? With the way your damp strands curled around your flushed cheeks, the smell of your rosy shampoo that had been seared into his nostrils by now, and the fact that all he had to do was undue your robe to see your beautiful glistening body that was so ready for him to take. It was all so easy. You handed him the apple and all he had to do was take a bite. 

“Fuck, Yunho!” You cried out, grasping his bare back for dear life as he frantically thrust into you. He was angry, angry at himself that he let this happen again, and angry at you for making him so weak. He only put just the tip in, but you could’ve sworn you were seeing stars from the stretch alone. 

“Unbelievable,” He grunted. “Even after the hundred times we fucked, your little pussy still can’t take my cock?”

You’d never seen this side of Yunho. Usually, he was nice and gentle with you, always studying the arch of your brows to see if he was taking things too far or not. It was sweet at first, but sometimes you’d wish he’d just take you and fuck you like an animal. It seemed your wish was finally granted. “P-Please! All of it, I want all of it Yunho, please!” Was all you could muster out. 

He pulled out of you in an instant, and before you could whine, he forcibly flipped you over and pulled you back by your hips until your ass smacked into his pelvis. Yunho kept you down with his hand pressed against the space between your shoulder blades as he lined himself up with your aching center. 

Yunho rubbed himself against your slick folds, occasionally slapping his tip over your swollen clit, making your hips jolt with anticipation. “You want it all? ‘Guess those other guys don’t fill you up as much as you want, huh? Poor thing.” He continued dragging his cock over your folds, your soft whimpers only feeding into his ego. 

Just when he thought you had enough, he guided his cock into your hole, the stretch forcing you to tear up once again. You grasped at your bed sheets and pressed your eyes shut, preparing yourself for the rest of him as your lips coated in salty tears. 

He pushed the rest of him into you with a struggle, his hips stagnant as he waited for you to adjust to his size. “Fuck!” You gasped, your voice cracking as he started up again. Each thrust was deep, calculated, and they didn’t fail to rip a moan out of you. 

His fingers, now coated with your essence, tweaked and twisted at your clit. It was all too much for you, really, the sheer length of him plowing into your walls, the brutal pace he set on account of his anger, along with the way he toyed at your clit. Yunho could sense you were close, having known your body long enough to know when you were about to be sent over the edge. He stopped teasing your bud and instead slipped his fingers past your lips and you readily let him in, swirling your tongue around his digits to clean yourself off him. He grinned to himself, pleased to see that you knew exactly what to do without any instruction. 

Suddenly, he pulled his fingers out from you and cupped your jaw with his large hand, pulling you back until your head was against his chest, keeping your face there so you were forced to look up at him. He peered down at you with his full attention, completely engrossed by just how pretty and sinful you looked in this position. “Stay like that,” He breathed “‘wanna see you when you cum all over my cock.” 

He came first, your orgasm approaching soon after. You babbled incoherently as his cum flooded your walls, forcing your eyes to roll to the back of your head. Yunho was completely enamored with you like this, your parted and swollen lips and your half-lidded eyelids almost making him shoot a second load into you. He disconnected from you and you fell forward onto the bed, catching your breath as you came down from your high. You felt dizzy and sweaty, and your head was so cloudy that you were unable to form a thought that wasn’t already so scrambled. As you relaxed, you felt Yunho’s breath over your hip right before he planted soft kisses on your lower back all the way up to your shoulder. His kisses were sweet and careful, almost like he was making up for being so rough with you. Soon enough, he retired from your shoulder and moved on to the side of your face, brushing his pillowy lips on your temple, to your wet eyes, to your cheek, until you craned your neck back and allowed him to meet your lips. 

It was almost foreign to you, to have someone care this deeply for you even after the act. None of your other partners behaved this way, and you were lucky if they even remembered to toss you a towel. But Yunho, he was different. He treated you as something more, and maybe it made you feel bad that you didn’t do the same for him. It was overwhelming, his soft kisses, his careful touches, the way he’d beg you to stay over, and the way he almost looked hurt when you say you can’t. Poor Yunho. He was in love with you, and you knew it. You hated yourself for toying with a man with good intentions. But what was the alternative? You couldn’t be his, and he couldn’t be yours. You made a promise to yourself years ago that you’d never be foolish enough to fall in love ever again. This had to stop, you should’ve stopped it months ago, but you were selfish. And lonely. The guilt you’ve been bottling up inside of you was too much to handle, and you knew you had to do something before you exploded.

Feeling disgusted with yourself, you pulled away from his lips. Yunho raised a brow at the sudden gesture. “What’s wrong?” He asked, his slightly concerned tone making your heart shatter into pieces. 

“You should get going. It’s late.” You got up, forcing Yunho to pull off of you. He watched you as you went over to your dresser to pull out a fresh pair of pajamas, completely dumbfounded by your sudden coldness. 

“Are you fucking serious?” He scoffed.

You shook your head, picking up his t-shirt that lay on the floor and tossing it over to him. His eyes flickered in anger and he threw his shirt back on the ground. “I don’t understand, why do you always do this!?” 

You stayed quiet, quickly covering yourself before turning around to face him, keeping your eyes low, feeling too ashamed to meet his. “I’m sorry, but I need you to go.” 

Yunho clenched his jaw. How could you be so cold? How could you invite him in, only to toss him out so abruptly? He thought about how you melted right into his embrace, how you kissed him back with the same amount of passion that he kissed you with. Was any of it real? Or was he too infatuated to notice that you were playing him, again? 

“Why? Is Yeosang coming over? Do you really think that guy cares about you?”

You balled your fists up at the mention of Yeosang. “Stop.” You warned.

“And San? He’d fuck anything with two legs and a heartbeat. Is that what you want?”

“Yes, Yunho, that’s exactly what I want!” You snapped. A silence weighed in before Yunho’s lips curled up in an unexpected smile. 

“What?” You teethed. 

He shook his head in disbelief. “You don’t know what you want. That’s why you keep coming back to me.” 

“Me?” You pointed to yourself, a crooked smile now spread across your lips. “No, it’s you that keeps coming back to me.” You jeered. 

“And you let me! Why do you let me!? Time after time, you take me back without question, why?”

You crossed your arms and looked away from his direction. You felt hot, like the blood in your veins was boiling. You didn’t want to deal with this. You felt stupid for letting him in. Yunho always had questions, so many questions, and you couldn’t give him any answers. Fed up with your silence, Yunho got up and walked towards you, almost closing the gap between you two. You still didn’t look at him. 

“And that night. Why did you come to me? Why didn’t you go to your other boyfriends? You were so different. Why did you act like it never happened the next day?” 

Your breath hitched in your throat. Your expression softened remembering that night. It was so cold and rainy that night, and Yunho felt so warm. He made you feel so loved, so cared for, and for once you felt like you deserved someone like him. But the morning sun gave you some clarity, and you were reminded once again of what happens when you fully give your heart to someone. Yunho didn’t see it now, but he’ll understand it one day. Love is a wasted emotion. It gives and gives, until one day it takes everything back from you, and more. 

“I don’t know.” You sighed. 

That wasn’t good enough for him. He took another step forward, the tips of your noses now just centimeters away from each other. “I’ll tell you why,” He said, his voice softer than earlier. “It’s because you like me. It’s because I’m the only one who really understands you, the only one who sees more to you than just your body. That’s why you keep taking me back. It’s why you came to me that night. You knew you could be vulnerable with me, and that I wouldn’t turn you away, because-” He paused for a moment to lick his lips. “Because I like you too, y/n.” 

Tears welled up in your eyes, and you tried to ignore the sting so that you wouldn’t blink and force them to run down your cheeks. Your chest felt like it was engulfed in flames, making your breathing unsteady. You were too caught up in your emotions to realize that Yunho closed the gap and pressed his lips onto yours, his hands firmly placed at your waist. 

He always kissed you like he wasn’t going to see you for a while. Maybe it was a force of habit considering all the times Yunho had ended things between you two. Or maybe, as he said, he liked you, and he wanted you to know from his touch if his words didn’t suffice. It felt right kissing him, real. Not like all the other times with your boy toys, who only kissed you because that’s just what came naturally when you're both rolling around naked in bed. Yunho never only kissed you on the lips, but everywhere else as well, your eyes, cheeks, forehead, and just every feature of you that made his heart swell and anywhere he could put his lips on if you let him. 

It was so easy. All you had to do was wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him back, leave this no strings attached bullshit behind, and let him lead the way. But you were reminded, reminded of him again, the one who took your heart and snapped it into two, the one who lead you to keep people at a distance and hurt them before they hurt you. That’s what you needed to do now, you told yourself. You had to hurt him. It made your heart ache even thinking of hurting Yunho, but you would be doing him a favor, even if he didn’t realize it now. You were damaged goods, not fit for sale. He’d be better off.

You pushed your hands on his chest to get him off you. Yunho, looking at you with such hope and hurt in his eyes, holding onto your hands that you used to keep him at a distance. He didn’t say anything, instead waiting for you to explain. 

Your eyes were down at your feet, too afraid to look him in the eye and say your next words. “I’m sorry Yunho, but I just don’t feel the same.” 

Yunho didn’t speak for a while. You wanted to look up at him, but you knew that seeing his reaction would crush you. You told yourself not to look. It was easier this way. 

“You don’t mean that.” Yunho kept his voice steady, even though he could feel a slight lump forming in his throat. “I know you feel the same, y/n.” 

You shook your head and a few droplets of tears splashed onto the carpet and onto your toes. “I’m sorry, but I don’t.” 

His hands let go of yours and he immediately brushed his fingers under your chin, forcing you to tilt your head up. “You really don’t feel what I feel? Then why don’t you look at me and say it?” 

He gazed down at you, waiting for your eyes to meet his, getting impatient with you when they didn’t. “Look at me and say you don’t want me.”

Overwhelmed, you moved your head around and pushed him off of you, too consumed in your rage to realize that for once that night, you were finally meeting his eyes. 

“I don’t want you. I never cared for you. You were just a distraction. Whatever you think was going on, it’s not true. You don’t know me, you don’t know what’s going on in my head, so don’t act as you do! For the love of god Yunho, just get the fuck out!” 

You panted after letting your frustrations out, the room now silent again. Nothing could have prepared you for the look on Yunho’s face right now. His sweet face was painted in constraint, his once cheery and sparkling brown eyes now glossy and downcast. You could feel your heart being ripped out of your chest, and for a moment you wanted to rush over to him and tell him you didn’t mean it, that you’ll do whatever he wants, be whatever he wants, as long as he stops making that face, but your legs stayed immobile and the words tangled up in your throat.

Yunho looked at you for a while, waiting to see if you would take those words back, but you never did. Swallowing the painful lump in his throat, he picked up his shirt from the floor and got dressed. You leaned back on your dresser, watching him as he put on his coat and slipped on his shoes. There was so much time to say something, anything, but neither of you uttered a word, and Yunho understood now that he said all that he needed to say, and that he couldn’t change your mind, even if he tried. 

He was now at your entry door, and you followed behind him, staying back a couple of feet as you prepared to watch him leave your life once and for all. As he held onto the knob, he turned his head slightly, as if he wanted to say something, but decided against it, and went on with turning the knob, his tall frame disappearing behind the closing door. 

You wanted to crawl into a ball and cry right there on the floor, but you stayed strong. You’re not crying over a guy again, you promised yourself. Even if it hurts…It’s for the best.

-

Finals were almost over, and the Library was seeing a reduction in visitors. The staff was partly relieved, enjoying the empty space and not having to be bothered to tell students to be quiet, confiscate their Cheeto bags (even though there’s a bold NO EATING sign at almost every table), and wake up tired students from their naps to tell them the library was closing. But there was one visitor who came almost daily and sat at the same exact spot in the same exact section. The Historical Fiction section.

The librarians didn’t know what his deal was. He’d come in with absolutely nothing, no backpack, no laptop, no textbook. They even doubted he brought his phone. Sometimes, he’d take a book off the historical fiction shelf and crack it open, although, unbeknownst to the library staff, he wasn’t actually reading anything. He tried to, but then his head would get fuzzy and he’d get lost in thought, his eyes darting around every time he heard the Library door open or footsteps approach his section, only for it to be another student or a staff member, and when he’d sigh and look back down at his book, he’d forget where he left off and start from the beginning again.

They didn’t know he was waiting on a girl. If they did, they would probably feel bad for him, and maybe even find his efforts to be a little pathetic. But to Yunho, it didn’t matter to him what they thought. Being the tortured romantic that he was, he still had hope that you two would be together again. He wasn’t going to crawl back to you like all the other times. Instead, he was going to wait. He believed the day would come where you’d grow sick from your passing relationships and realize your true feelings for him. And when you realize that, you’ll come running to the Library where you two first met, and you would find him there, sitting at your table in your special little corner of the Library. He’d greet you with a friendly smile, and pull out a chair for you, and you two would just pick up where you left off as if nothing else ever happened. Maybe then he’d take you out on a real date, maybe to a fancy restaurant which neither of you could pronounce the name of, and afterward, you’d crash at his place and you’d lay in his arms just as you did that night, and he’d whisper corny jokes into your hair, both of you laughing softly until you finally fell asleep. Maybe, after a while of sleeping over, you’d take a liking to his idea of moving into a small and cramped apartment on the outskirts of the city, where there’s no one around to bother you except each other. Maybe. Who knows.

They didn’t know he was waiting on a girl. If they did, they would probably feel bad for him, and maybe even find his efforts to be a little pathetic. But to Yunho, it didn’t matter what they thought. Being the tortured romantic that he was, he still had hope that you two would be together again. He wasn’t going to crawl back to you like all the other times. Instead, he was going to wait. He believed the day would come where you’d grow sick from your passing relationships and realize your true feelings for him. And when you realize that, you’ll come running to the place where you two first met, and you would find him there, sitting at your table in your special little corner of the Library. He’d greet you with a friendly smile, and pull out a chair for you, and you two would just pick up where you left off as if nothing else ever happened. Maybe then he’d take you out on a real date, maybe to a fancy restaurant which neither of you could pronounce the name of, and afterward, you’d crash at his place and you’d lay in his arms just as you did that night, and he’d whisper corny jokes into your hair, both of you laughing softly until you finally fell asleep. Maybe, after a while of sleeping over, you’d take a liking to his idea of moving into a small and cramped apartment on the outskirts of the city, where there’s no one around to bother you except each other. Maybe. Who knows.

-

Finals were almost over, and the Library was seeing a reduction in visitors. The staff was partly relieved, enjoying the empty space and not having to be bothered to tell students to be quiet, confiscate their Cheeto bags (even though there’s a bold NO EATING sign at almost every table), and wake up tired students from their naps to tell them they were closing. But there was one visitor who came almost daily and sat at the same exact spot in the same exact section like clockwork. The Historical Fiction section. 

The librarians didn’t know what his deal was. He’d come in with absolutely nothing, no backpack, no laptop, and no textbook to indicate if he was taking a summer class at least. Sometimes, he’d take a book off the historical fiction shelf and crack it open, although, unbeknownst to the library staff, he wasn’t actually reading anything. He tried to, but then his head would get fuzzy and he’d get lost in thought, his eyes darting around every time he heard the Library door open or footsteps approach his section, only for it to be another student or a staff member, and when he’d sigh and look back down at his book, he’d forget where he left off and start from the beginning again. 

They didn’t know he was waiting on a girl. If they did, they would probably feel bad for him, and maybe even find his efforts to be a little pathetic. But to Yunho, it didn’t matter what they thought. Being the tortured romantic that he was, he still had hope that you two would be together again. He wasn’t going to crawl back to you like all the other times. Instead, he was going to wait. He believed the day would come where you’d grow sick from your passing relationships and realize your true feelings for him. And when you realize that, you’ll come running to the Library where you two first met, and you would find him there, sitting at your table in your special little corner of the Library. He’d greet you with a friendly smile, and pull out a chair for you, and you two would pick up where you left off as if nothing else ever happened. Maybe then he’d take you out on a real date, maybe to a fancy restaurant which neither of you could pronounce the name of, and afterward, you’d crash at his place and lay in his arms just as you did that night, and he’d whisper corny jokes into your hair, both of you laughing softly until you finally fell asleep. Maybe, after a while of sleeping over, you’d take a liking to his idea of moving into a small and cramped apartment on the outskirts of the city, where there’s no one around to bother you except each other. Maybe. Who knows. 

[drewsbuzzcut]

Right Where You Left Me

mat barzal x model!fem!reader

a visceral in doses fic

warnings: angst, self inflicted doubts, slight jealousy, lack of communication, age gaps, break ups, alcohol consumption, and I think that’s all

this takes place when they were just dating

You sit in your bedroom, trying to stop your tears from falling as you look out your window. It’s to no avail.

How could a perfect night end up so terribly wrong? You were meant to celebrate your latest magazine cover with Mat in attendance. Now you’re crying your eyes out, wishing you never invited him along.

The night started off great. You and Mat walked around, socializing with everyone there. You both had a couple drinks and Mat quite literally never left your side. He was proud of you and wanted to see how appreciated you are. You’re the one who left his side. Never in your life have you been the jealous type, but when you walked back to Mat after getting you and him drinks from the bar, you weren’t expecting to see him so enthusiastically talking to another woman. His smile is wide to the point you can see his dimples. His body language is relaxed and her’s is laced with interest. Why wouldn’t she be?

You linger back, halting your steps in favor of letting the crowd drown you out from where you’re witnessing Mat and the woman’s conversation. Deciding to avoid them, you turn and find someone to talk to. Your conversation is only a distraction especially when you can hear the distinct sound of your boyfriend’s laughter. You peek over your shoulder only to regret it the second you catch a glance at the woman he’s talking to. She’s a woman. In every sense. Her makeup is so elegant and light. Her hair is perfectly curled and pinned, and her outfit looks like it was designed just for her. She’s everything you’re insecure about- especially in regard to your relationship and age gap with Mat.

You bite the bullet and excuse yourself from who you were talking to, making your way to the person you wish you didn’t want to avoid.

“Hi,” you mumble and mentally slap yourself for coming off as shy or intimidated.

“Y/n! Hi, honey. Your cover is fantastic! For a young model you sure do have an amazing resume,” she compliments you, her words have a way of punching your gut.

“Thank you! That means a lot,” you try to fake a smile and she buys it, but you can see Mat look at you from the corner of your eye.

“I am so sorry. Where are my manners? This is Mathew Barzal, he’s a hockey player. I don’t know how he ended up at an event like this, but we were just talking about hockey. As an older Canadian who grew up around hockey, I was attempting to school him. I wanted to see if he knew his own game as well as I do,” the woman says, cocking her head to the side in utter confidence.

You knew she was older.

You give her another faint smile before responding.

“He’s a great hockey player. Mat’s my boyfriend,” you state and watch as realization crosses her facial features.

“My goodness, sorry. He didn’t mention he was here with his girlfriend, but I guess it never really came up. Wow! How did a man like you end up with a girl like Y/n? I would’ve expected you to be with someone around your age and not as busy,” she has the audacity to say to your face.

“I can keep up with him just fine, thanks for your concern,” you bite, smiling sarcastically.

“She’s the best girlfriend,” Mat finally decided to contribute to the conversation. He throws an arm over your shoulders, but you quickly remove yourself after bidding a quick goodbye to the woman whose name you’re glad you didn’t learn.

You never wanted to see her again.

“Are you okay?” Mat asks, catching up to you and resting a hand on your arm.

“I’m fine,” you say stoically.

“No you’re not,” he points out.

“Then why’d you ask?” You snap, still facing away from him.

“What the hell is going on?” He grabs your shoulders and turns you towards him.

“What the hell is going on with you and that lady?” You question.

Mat looks confused because why are you angry about him talking to someone else. Mat looks confused because why are you tearing up and not making eye contact with him?

“What are you talking about?” He tries to reach for your hands, but you pull them away from him before he can touch you.

“Stop doing that,” he whispers.

His veins on his neck are already starting to pop out and his face is getting flushed. He’s having a hard time being patient with you.

“Can you take me home?” You ask silently.

“Can you answer my question?”

“No, because if I do, we’re just going to fight,” you answer.

“Why would you, answering my question, make us fight? If anything, you not answering my question and ignoring me is what’s pissing me off,” he claims, a warning in his tone.

You drag your fingers through your hair and turn away from him again. You can feel your chest heave even though you’re trying to hide it. You face him again, your teary eyes flashing up at him. The crinkle in between your eyebrows gets Mat to close the distance and smooth out the skin with his thumb. You hold onto his wrist and push his hand away.

“You looked like you were really enjoying your conversation with her. Like I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so animated, not even with me,” you whisper and shut your eyes.

Mat’s eyebrows turn down in a frown and his lips form into a semi-frown.

“That can’t be true, and we were just talking about hockey. You know I love hockey,” he says.

“You never talk with me about hockey, besides game details. I know you know that hockey isn’t my favorite, but when it comes to you I’d talk about anything.”

“I don’t mean to not talk about hockey with you. I can change that, though, easily,” he tries to calm your worries, but you can’t stop the thoughts in your head.

“The thing is that you can find it so easy to talk to another woman about something that you find hard to talk about with me,” you counter. Your face pinches up in discomfort.

“You can’t place all of that blame on me,” he responds.

“I’m not trying to blame just you. She just seemed really interested in you and what she said was bitchy. She made it seem like you both were flirting,” you stress.

“That wasn’t my case. I was just talking to her about hockey,” Mat defends himself. You believe him but those damn thoughts in your head can’t be silenced.

“I just can’t get over the vibe I got from the way you looked so cozy.”

“I don’t know what to tell you to make you believe me. I’m telling the truth that nothing was or is going on with that woman. It was just a conversation. I don’t know how to get through to you,” he says through clenched teeth.

You grab onto his hand for the first time since you started this conversation. You squeeze them gently before looking into Mat’s eyes.

“That’s my fault. I just- I thought maybe you didn’t know how to handle me, but maybe I don’t know how to handle you. You and all that you come with. Maybe you should be with someone older and not some little girl who doesn’t know what she’s dealing with,” you admit through soft cracks of your voice.

Mat wipes away your tears, looking down at you with a saddened expression.

“No. No, please don’t do this. You are perfect for me. I don’t want a girlfriend if it’s not you, you know me,” he argues, shaking his head repeatedly and continuously wiping away your tears.

“We’re at different stages in life. You need someone older. Someone who isn’t me! I’m not right for you and clearly that’s noticeable to everyone except us,” you explain, flitting your eyes up to his only to regret it once you see nothing but pain in them.

“Why are you doing this? Why are you giving up on us? You’re the love of my life, that much I’m sure of. It’s only 5 years. We’re both adults,” he states, holding onto your face even though it’s no use.

“Can you please just take me home?”

Mat doesn’t say anything. He bitterly nods his head and moves away from you, begrudgingly walking to his car.

The car ride is quiet and tense. The air condition isn’t enough to drown out the silence or your sniffles. Each time Mat hears you, he flinches and recoils his hands before he can fully reach out to touch you.

When he parks outside of your apartment, he hastily gets out to open your door for you. Your heart twists in an ache that seems like it’ll be a permanent visitor. You’re going to miss him so much.

“I can get up by myself,” you mutter when you realize he’s following you inside.

“Please, Y/n. I love you,” he pulls you back by your hand, a hand going to your waist because he physically can’t let go of you.

“And I love you. That’s why we can’t be together. You deserve someone better,” you stress.

“You don’t get it. There is no one better. There is just you. You, Y/n L/n, the love of my life. What do I need to do to make you believe that? What have I done to make you doubt me?”

“Nothing. Follow me or don’t follow me up, but we’re done, okay?” You pull out of his grasp, hoping and begging that he doesn’t follow you.

When you get to your door, your shaking hands fumble the keys and struggle to unlock your door. You can feel his presence behind you and it makes you feel worse. You rip the door open, hoping that behind it there’s fresh air. You turn to close it, rapidly blinking your tears away as you stare into Mat’s eyes. You see his red rimmed eyes and the defeated gaze in his face, but you don’t have it in yourself to say anything. You close the door in his face and wait a few minutes for him to leave so you can break down completely. You had no idea that he spent the entire night outside your front door, hearing you sob and fighting with himself to find a way to comfort you.

a/n: Enjoy some Mat and model!reader angst!

[theresattrpgforthat]

Oooo you know what I haven't seen a lot of? Games meant for long term play between two players. Id love to see that!

THEME: Long-Term 2-Player

Hello friend, here's a few specific recommendations, but you'll want to take a look at the bits I recommend at the end as well!

Afterglow, by Fistful of Crits.

It started when a WIZARD cleaved apart the temple into two. Because, in the cyclical way of things, one ideology eventually wins out over the other. The Celestial Cycles shatter and pour away, blending into the colour of their worship into tones of soft purple and creamy orange hues.

Now there is no more day or night, no rising or setting of the Godly tombs that float in carefully calculated arches through the sky: there is only the AfterGlow and the wake of a different world.

AfterGlow is a solo or co-operative play journaling TTRPG game. Become a Dawncarver Acolyte of the Light, Imefelga, or a Nightweaver Acolyte of the God of the Night, Elestrell. Expand the world as you explore, search for offerings, fight dangerous threats and discover the mysteries of the Wizard and the AfterGlow.

AfterGlow is designed using the Firelights system, which was originally designed for solo play, and inspired by games such as Hollow Knight. As a game system, I think it’s one of the games that’s meant to last longer than just one session, and since AfterGlow uses the same bones, I’m guessing that it could work as a longer game as well. Just keep in mind that this game isn’t inspired by Hollow Knight; it’s more of a fantastical post-apocalypse.

Empanel, by Bogus Cheesecake.

The year is 1915 - you sit inside a dreary office, working as a telegraph operator for the North American rail system.  The dots and dashes of the telegraph machine spell out a dreary, unfulfilling existence. Until one day, a new kind of message appears. 

Empanel is a two-player narrative roleplaying game based around telegrams and queer yearning. Completely diceless, Empanel's messaging-based gameplay is designed for long-distance play between you and a partner. 

Empanel provides a new spin on two-player conversational roleplaying. Step into the shoes of a middle-aged telegraph operator (or anyone, we're not your boss) and explore the feelings of reconnecting with a love long past. 

I find that two-player games designed to happen over long distances naturally lend to more long-form play, although that is partially because of the time it is expected to take to send messages to each-other. That being said, even if you don’t live that far away, you’ll be expected to think carefully about the messages you send to each-other, as well as spend time encoding and decoding every letter you send. If you want a game about longing and secrecy, you might like this game.

Trading Places, by Jamie Sands.

Trading Places is a game for two people - one who has an ordinary life, and one who has an extraordinary life. They both keep journals. One day, they wake up in each other's bodies.  What happens next is entirely up to the people playing - will your story be a poignant examination of what a life of value means? Will you create a holiday-themed romantic comedy or an existential horror? 

This game doesn’t look like it has a recommended play time, and since it’s a journaling game, you’ll likely need to wait for each other to submit journal entries. I think the fact that you can change the tone of this game makes it really flexible, so you can talk with the other player about what kind of story you’d like to share. I also really like the idea of exploring the life of another person, and coming up with that as you go.

One More Thing, by Nathan D. Paoletta.

Somebody has been murdered! The murderer is sure they will get away with it - but the detective is on the case, and quickly sees the truth of the matter. Both of them know that the murderer did it; the question is how to prove it.

Your story begins with the murder, and continues as a back-and-forth drama playing out in the view of an imaginary television audience. The Murderer never gets away with it, but they can control how the audience sees them in the end. Were they justified in their crime? Did they see no way out of an untenable situation? Or are they a cold-hearted monster who took a life for their own material gain?

One More Thing tells compelling stories of criminals bought to justice, in the finest tradition of TV detective dramas from the 1970s to today.

This game feels episodic, but I don’t think that would stop it from being something a bit more long-form. You could run this either with one player embodying the same detective over a series of different murders, or you could alternate between roles, perhaps following the stories of two connected detectives, or switching between different tones.

Hit the Road, Jack, by Urania Games.

Hit the Road, Jack is a solo/duet game of adrenaline rush and creeping terror. Of chasing and being chased, of being forced to face your sins or to leave them all behind. It is a game of cat and mouse between two characters that we call the Jacks.

This is a game that mentions blood, violence, drugs, crime, and death - both deaths you choose and deaths you don’t.

Jack Be Nimble is the sinner, the criminal, and the one being chased. 

Jack Be Quick is the lawman, the aggrieved, and the one who chases. 

This is their journey cross-country across an empty stretch of highways. By drawing tarot cards and responding to journaling prompts, you will be able to flesh out the nature of these two Jacks, their relationship, and how they deal with whatever the road throws at them.

The game page mentions that there are different lengths of play that you can use for this game, so that tells me that long-form is definitely on the table here. I don’t know how long exactly the game is, but the nice thing about having two different roles, is that you can likely play the game twice, switching roles to give each of you a chance to be each character.

Other Games To Check Out

Little Shepherd, Little Spy, by @psychhound, has a two-player mode called Little Mortal, Little Fey. It’s a game about communication between spies, so I feel like it’s meant to happen over a significant period of time.

There's a lot of GM-Less games out there that aren't specifically two-player but are duet friendly, and are designed for longer-form play.

[bizkitsnuggets]

08 — THE PLAGUE

m.list

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“You liar!” The brunet angrily cornered Mattsun with a red face. He couldn't believe it! Mattsun had tricked him about getting McDonald's and instead drove him to some place. Tooru quickly noticed that the “place” was Night Shift's practice location.

Mattsun only smirked before responding, “Too bad, should've checked the GPS then.” He shrugged, making the red in Tooru’s face a darker shade. The brunet groaned in annoyance. Out of all the places Mattsun could've taken him, here…?

He clearly wasn't having it, but Mattsun was the only one with a car, and calling a cab on this busy road didn't seem ideal or realistic. Tooru knew he had no other choice but to stay in that place for a few more hours before he could go home.

“C’mon, UFO nut, what's so bad about watching the group practice? They sound good!” Mattsun broke the odd silence.

Tooru closed his eyes and pinched his nose. “It's not the music, Mattsun. It's her.” He emphazised the word ‘her’, hinting who he meant to Mattsun. The brunet sighed, he really didn’t want to deal with YN. Tooru simply didn’t have the energy left, as he had spilled his milk tea all over his sweater and his professor pestering him to mark his student’s work.

The red on his face had faded away and was now replaced with an annoyed expression from just remembering the not-so-pleasing morning he had.

Mattsun clicked his tongue and flicked the brunet’s forehead, “You’re actually an idiot. She’s not gonna kill you just because you like aliens.” Tooru whined in respond, he’s fully aware he’s being childish about this whole situation. There’s no one else to blame but him. Still, he doesn’t want to cave into reality and believe he is in the wrong and instead continue his overgrowing hatred for poor YN.

And he knows that even if he bribed or begged Mattsun to take him home, it won’t work. Matsukawa is a strong man with a strong mentality. He doesn’t fall for silly tricks or antics especially if it’s from Tooru. Maybe if the brunet turned into a certain candy-colored vocalist, Mattsun would agree to drive him home…

Tooru crossed his arms and pouted like a sulky toddler, “You owe me mcodnalds on the way home.”

Upon entering the place, most of the band members were either cleaning or tuning their instruments. Unsuprsingly, Iwaizumi was also present. He never misses a group practice or performance, ‘I guess he’s a big fan of them’. Tooru thought as he rolled his eyes.

Mattsun and the brunet greeted everyone as if it was an objective in a video game to talk to every person present. But, as they were approaching their last target, YN, Tooru had noticed a vibrant colored keychain hanging from her jeans. Oh, how Tooru was hating himself for deciding to not wear his glasses today. Mattsun thought he looked stupid squinting his eyes like that would make a difference. Upon a closer inspection, the alien obsseded brunet realized YN’s keychain was the limited edition toy story alien keychain.

He winded his eyes in pure disbelief, a new mix of emotions started consuming him. Tooru wasn’t sure if it was jealousy, excitement, shock, or even relief.

Was he intrigued? Very much so.

Will he stop being an ass to YN? No.

Mattsun greeted the bass player as she was busy wiping dirt off of her precious bass. She looked up at him and smiled, “Hey! Glad to see Makki’s boyfriend again.” YN teased as Mattsun’s face turned into a dark shade of red. The girl shifted her gaze to the unusually quiet Tooru. He wasn’t even looking at her, his eyes were everywhere but her own.

Despite that, she still made sure to acknowledge him. Tooru responded by glaring at her and then giving her an obvious fake smile. The kind of smile you give someone when you want to let them know that you don’t vibe with them.

And that deceiving smile of his didn’t go unnoticed by Iwaizumi and Makki who were watching the scene unfold. Fortunately for YN, she never picked up his expression and returned a cheeky smile. Which earned a low “ugh,” from the brunet.

────────────────────────────────

notes:

iwa doesn't have a car so he rides a motorcycle instead

tanaka and bokuto were at the dog park when they had practice

in the end, mattsun treated tooru to kfc instead of mcdonalds

do you guys believe in aliens?

taglist: @this-is-me-lolol @stayyyyyyyyyyyy21 @kettlepop @causenessus @neeksnicoboytoy @does-directions @rinheartshyunlix @nnnyxie @bae-ashlynn @iluv-ace @k0z3me @eyes-ofhell @sereniteav @phoenix-eclipses @whosramiel

[starsfic]

The Fall of DogDay

Summary: It has been three years since the Hour of Joy. The Smiling Critters are trying their best to take care of the children, but the adult bodies are running low, and sanity is starting to run even lower. There is only one option to even get a chance to escape the factory, and Dogday sets off to rescue her.

(Or, the player was not the first to try and free Poppy.)

Notes: Originally, this fic was going to take place six months after the Hour of Joy, but while I was doing research, I changed that. Check out the AO3 version to find other notes!

AO3/Ko-Fi

-_-

Three years.

It had been three years since the Hour of Joy.

DogDay wasn’t really certain of this. It somehow felt both longer and shorter than that, but Bubba claimed it had been three years based on the clock, so he believed him.

It had been three years, and yet the Smiling Critters survived.

It was the most positive way DogDay could describe it.

It was sad, but the kids were doing a lot better than they were, which was a better way to word it. When the alarms started going off and the Prototype started screaming in their minds, the Smiling Critters acted as trained to. They had herded all the kids away from the slaughter, down the elevator, and into the emergency bunker. They had all been able to ignore the desire for bloodlust.

Well, not every Smiling Critter had been able to.

DogDay winced at the thought. “You okay?” Hoppy Hotscotch’s voice broke through his thoughts. She brushed against his shoulder, her eyes probably wide with concern. “Are you hurt?” The rubble contained stuff like metal and wires that could slice at palms and fingers.

“I’m fine,” DogDay straightened, eyeing the cavern wall before them. “Just…getting a little annoyed with digging.”

The bunker was… decent. Big enough to host the entire Playtime Co. staff, which meant it was almost too big for the few hundred kids and the Smiling Critters. According to the manual Bubba had found, it was built to withstand nuclear blasts, built with an automatic fire sprinkler system and the same lights used in sunlamps, and, with careful rationing, have enough food for over twenty years for over a thousand people. However, there was only one entrance and only one other back door.

The food and back door were the issues.

There was enough rations for the kids. There was no questioning that. There was even a garden that Picky Piggy and some of the older kids took care of. However, the toys were built to consume one thing only: raw meat.

Big industrial freezers had been built into the bunker. That contained lots of meat, ranging from chicken to beef to veal, enough to create lots of good dinners for humans with careful rationing. However, Picky Piggy had tried some of the raw meat when making dinner and had spent the rest of the night violently throwing up. For whatever fucking reason, the toys could only eat human meat.

For the first two years, that hadn’t been an issue.

Even if they hated it, the pit where the… staff were had been accessible to everyone. 

Picky Piggy, always sent to grab food, had commented once that it felt like the other toys let her go first. “I think they know we’re taking care of the kids,” she had said. “It’s kinda nice.” She had even been able to sneak up to the other levels and raid any vending machines and the cafeteria for extra food for the kids. Once, she had even been allowed to sneak into Home Sweet Home to grab any baby formula or toys left behind in the rush.

Even when the staff’s bodies ran low, humans still came in. First, it was the police officers that DogDay guessed ventured too far in. Then strange people in brightly-colored hazmat suits had started coming. Rumor said that they were looking for toy parts, to build more toys.

Toys like them.

For a while, they had kept coming in, killed by Huggy Wuggy or Boxy-Boo or even Mommy Long Legs and dumped in the pit. For over two years, starting six months after the Hour of Joy, they had come in, every week.

Six months ago, they had stopped coming, which led them to realize the second problem.

The backdoor, the door that didn’t lead into the factory full of monsters, was blocked off by rubble.

DogDay, of course, had decided to unblock it. Sooner or later, the bodies of those Resource Extraction Specialists and whatever was left of the staff would be gone. He didn’t want to be here, in close quarters with the kids, if hunger overtook them. It was hard work that they had to do in shifts of two, considering how tight the passage up was, but he figured that they would get out sooner rather than later with hard work.

Hoppy sighed, unaware of his true thoughts. "Yeah, I feel ya." She reached out and wiped her brow. They didn't sweat, but it felt like a comforting gesture. "It feels like we're just gonna keep digging forever."

"Don't worry, I'm sure we'll get out soon!" DogDay grabbed a piece of rubble and shoved it back. He and Hoppy would soon need to take a break to load the rubble into the rubble deposit tunnels that Bubba had insisted they dig first. "I can already feel the sunlight! Smell the poppies!"

"Yeah, about that..." Hoppy's hand on his shoulder made him look back. The green rabbit's eyes darted around, as if expecting someone to be eavesdropping on them. "Can I tell you something? I don't know who else to tell, and I don't want to scare the kids."

"Yeah, sure, what is it?"

Hoppy took a deep breath.

"I think CraftyCorn is losing it," Hoppy whispered softly, like she was worried that the unicorn would hear them. "I was helping her with a painting last night, right?"

"Right?" CraftyCorn wanted to paint a mural on the walls to give the bunker some color.

"And, she needed red for some poppies, but we were out of red in the paint cupboard." Hoppy gripped her arm, where a new bandage sat. "She accused me of hiding more red."

DogDay felt the pieces slide together.

"She... attacked you?"

Hoppy nodded. "I'm really glad the kids were asleep, because I was terrified of her right then. KickinChicken ended up finding some red paint, I think it was used for marking the tornado spots, but she calmed down the moment she saw I was bleeding red."

DogDay blinked. He had heard Hoppy loud and clear, but he couldn't match the image of CraftyCorn to violence. "Did...did she say anything? Did she apologize?"

Hoppy shook her head. "No. I mean, she used the paint KickinChicken found, but she hasn't said a word about it. But I just sat on it all night. I mean, what if she had accused a kid of doing that?" Her ears flattened against her head. "I know CraftyCorn wouldn't do something like that, but the thought is now in my head and and and..."

"...and?"

DogDay didn't expect the next words.

"I was on the roof earlier today, staring at the cliffs. And...and I wondered, what would happen if I jumped right there..." DogDay's mind whirred at the admittance. Once again, his brain was connecting dots, and, once again, not revealing a good picture.

He had found Hoppy on the roof before their shift. He had thought she just wanted a moment of quiet, peace, and fresh air before they were here. DogDay had done that a number of times before.

But, Hoppy had been considering... that? DogDay couldn't even think of the word.

This was all painting a picture.

DogDay felt himself twitch at the thought. They couldn't wait to finish clearing the rubble. He meant, they could work on the passage, but they needed a faster solution. Food for the toys was running low, sanity was beginning to run low among the tots, and the Smiling Critters were not surviving as well as he made himself believe. They needed a way out, now.

And, as he thought, as he began to once again mechanically move rubble as Hoppy began to chatter about some of the kids planning a play, probably guessing that he had hit his limit of awful things, DogDay had a thought.

An idea.

A way to survive and get out.

Poppies...Not just poppies.

Poppy.

-_-

“No.”

“What?”

“Are you crazy?!” Everyone jolted at the harsh words from Bobby, but she didn’t seem to care. “There’s no way the Prototype will even let you go near Poppy, let alone let her out!”

DogDay raised a finger to his mouth, trying not to think of the anger in his chest. “Guys, shush. You’ll wake the kids.” It was about midnight, meaning the kids had gone to bed, and now all seven of them sat around the kitchen table as DogDay presented his idea.

KickinChicken seemed to follow the command of lowering his voice, even as he provided Bobby with backup. “Nobody’s even seen Poppy since the Hour of Joy. How do we know the Prototype didn’t just off her?”

That was a fair point. Poppy had been the leader of the toys long before the scientists created the Prototype. It was an unspoken law: whatever Poppy says, do. DogDay was pretty sure the only reason why everyone had done the Hour of Joy was because Poppy hadn’t been seen in weeks, and everyone was just that done. It would be reasonable to assume the Prototype had gotten rid of her to make sure he stayed in charge. “Bubba and I talked about it.” He glanced at the elephant sitting across from him. “Right, Bubba?”

The elephant hadn’t said a word beyond his initial rejection. His brows furrowed as everyone turned to him. Finally, he sighed. “DogDay is correct. We have discussed it.” They had spent long nights, those first few weeks of fear and tension, talking about it.

“And?” Hoppy said, crossing her arms. “What?”

“The Prototype mostly ignored us, especially CatNap,” Bubba folded his hands as he adjusted his position. He stared at the table like it was a map. “However, he paid attention to Poppy and seemed to show a fondness for her, even though she openly hated him. It was to the point that notes about his… attitude towards her called it a concern.”

“Basically, he was obsessed with her,” DogDay said. “There’s no way he would get rid of her, especially when the Doctor-” A cold chill went down his spine at the title. Everyone else shuddered on cue. DogDay pushed back the thoughts of cold hands and even colder hands to return to his plans. “Had that special case for her.” He leaned forward and unrolled the map of the factory. Before the meeting, DogDay had poured over it, marking out a route. He tapped it, and Hoppy and Bubba leaned in, their eyes following his finger as he traced his route. “There’s a back door to that room. All I need to do is sneak into Playcare-”

“Where Catnap is.”

“-Thank you Bobby, get to the train, set the train to go back to the Game Station-”

“Where Mommy Long Legs is.”

“- Thank you CraftyCorn, sneak out of the Game Station, take the emergency stairs up to where Poppy’s room is, and simply walk in, open the case, and get Poppy.” DogDay tried for a peppy smile, even as anxiety ate at him. Based on how Bobby’s eyes were narrowing, he wasn’t doing a good job at the smile. “Easy and simple! Nobody hangs around in that section. Then we just come back here the way I came in, we load everyone onto the train, and we take it to the very end of the tracks.” He switched the factory map for the train track map and tapped the very end of the tracks.

Conveniently, right next to two exits: either the front door or the warehouse.

“Then we simply walk out the door! Do I have a plan after that…?” Everyone blinked, waiting. DogDay sighed. “No, no, I do not. But, hey! We just need to escape the factory first, and then we can go from there.”

It was easy. Simple. Almost too easy and simple.

The other Smiling Critters exchanged looks. DogDay waited with bated breath. If they said no, then he would wait, just a bit longer and work on the passage in the meanwhile. Maybe until desperation began to sink in.

"Okay," Bubba stood. "If anyone thinks that DogDay should not go and risk his life to rescue Poppy, raise your hands." He raised his hand. So did Bobby and Hoppy. The last glanced at CraftyCorn, narrowing her eyes, but the unicorn looked away. "Okay. That's three. If anyone agrees with DogDay's plan, raise your hands."

DogDay raised his hand. Picky Piggy winced but raised her hand. KickinChicken raised his hand as well, ducking his head to avoid Hoppy's betrayed look.

"That's a tie," Hoppy noted, tearing her eyes away from her exercise buddy. "Crafty?" Her eyes narrowed harder at the unicorn. DogDay realized, with a start, that she hadn't looked at Hoppy throughout this entire meeting. Now that he thought about it, she hadn't spoken all throughout dinner. "You're the last vote."

It should be second to last, DogDay mused. But his best friend, his second in command, wasn't here. Bubba was great, but it wasn't the same.

"I...I...it's dangerous," CraftyCorn said, voice almost too low. "Too dangerous. What would happen if you didn't come back?"

DogDay nodded. "I get where you're coming from. While I'm gone, I want you guys to keep working on the backdoor in case I get chased out. If I were to...die," Everyone winced at the word. "I'm leaving Bubba in charge. He's better at handling things than me."

“Is there a time when you want us to give up hope of you returning?” Bubba asked, proving DogDay’s point. His heart skipped a beat a second later, realizing the elephant was talking as if CraftyCorn had agreed to let DogDay out. “It shouldn’t take very long, only a few hours. But that is when the factory is normal.”

Yeah. And the factory hadn't been normal in a while.

“A month,” DogDay decided as CraftyCorn raised her hand. “Give me a month to come back to you guys.”

Bubba sighed, sitting back down. "Then, I change my vote. DogDay has clearly thought about this." His hand raised, even as his expression said that he was at a funeral. DogDay didn't even need to count the votes to realize what the result was.

It was five to two.

Guess I'm going on an adventure...

-_-

Hoppy had insisted that DogDay let the kids say goodbye before he left the next morning. Her intentions were pretty clear with the gesture, but DogDay did his best to ignore it as he dispensed last hugs, head pats, and handshakes to the kids. He promised that he would be back soon, he would tell them all the story of his adventure when he got back, and that he loved them. The last bit was unneeded, but hey. Sometimes the kids needed their favorite toys to tell them that they loved them back.

Picky Piggy walked him out of the bunker. For a while now, she was the only one who left the bunker and the caves beyond. They had all offered to accompany her several times now, but Picky Piggy had always refused.

Not this time.

They walked in silence except for the drip of water against the stone. Picky Piggy led the way, following the lights that lit the path, with tightly furrowed brows.

Finally, they arrived at the elevator.

DogDay pressed the button. With the whine of the motor, the elevator began to descend.

"You know, I think this is a bad idea." He turned at the words. Picky Piggy stared at the floor. "I know, I voted for you and all. But it's a bad idea. Unneeded risk and all that." He prepared to retort, but she held out a hand. "But it's also a good chance. So, here."

She tossed something at him, and DogDay caught it. It was a satchel. He opened it, raising a brow, and paused. Two loose Grabpack hands with electrical wire sat inside, next to Picky Piggy’s lockpicking kit and a few small tools. Four objects had been wrapped in paper and, based on the smell, DogDay knew what they were.

"Is this...?"

"The liver's a little moldy, but it's not off entirely."

"Picky, I can't take this." He loved organ meat, even though he hated that he liked a specific part of eating human. But food for the Smiling Critters was already so stretched. "Everyone else-"

"Everyone else insisted I make you something so you didn't get hungry," Picky Piggy finally looked up from the floor. A wry smile creased her features. "You better not waste it."

DogDay gripped the satchel tight.

"I promise." The elevator clunked as it finally hit the floor. “I promise, I’ll come back to you guys.”

Picky Piggy nodded. “We know.” A hand pressed gently on his chest. “Now, go, before I think about dragging you back to the bunker.”

Despite his resolve, Dogday's feet dragged as he made his way to the elevator. The clink of the doors behind him sounded like the toll of a bell. Picky Piggy’s shoulders trembled as she pressed the button.

The elevator descended up, pulling DogDay away from his family and hopefully to Poppy. He stared down, however, not looking away from Picky Piggy until the walls surrounded him and cut off the sight of her.

Much like time, the elevator ride somehow felt too long and too short. DogDay kept quiet the entire time. The elevator cut through the labs, where the Prototype lurked. He didn’t need his quest being cut short barely five minutes in.

But nothing jumped out at him or attacked. It was just him, the darkness, and the groan of the elevator. DogDay looked up when light infiltrated the darkness. Above, a massive lid was rising up. He stood, gripping the satchel tight.

The elevator clunked into place and the doors swung open. DogDay didn’t immediately march out, however. Instead, he peeked his head out, just looking around. The gas production zone was quiet, excluding the weird violin soundtrack. DogDay counted to five minutes, waiting for anyone to come in, lured by the sound of the creak and clunk of the metal in here.

Five minutes passed. Nobody came.

DogDay finally stepped out.

He padded out of the room. The violin soundtrack grew louder in here as it was revealed that the gas-channeling machine was offline. DogDay hummed. He may need to deal with that later. Right now, he needed to get to Poppy. He padded out of the room and set off down the hall, ignoring the claw marks and streaks of blood.

The door to Playcare was thankfully unlocked. All DogDay needed to do was open it, and he stepped into Playcare. He stopped at the sight that greeted him.

Playcare had obviously seen better days.

The tarp, painted like the sky that hid the metal beams of construction, was pulling away in some areas. Only the main overhead light shone down in the area’s day mode, giving the edges creepy shadows that DogDay now padded out of. The buildings were all grungy, with paint peeling and dust covering them. Several things had been knocked over, and he ignored the blood stains. Even the Critters’ statue, once the main hub of the orphanage, was now covered in ivy. DogDay tried to ignore the missing Critter, his statue now lying broken on the ground.

(The workers had just pulled him off when it began.)

But there was no sign of CatNap.

DogDay looked around, just in case. Nope, no sign of him. That made sense. CatNap was sensitive to bright light. It didn’t help that he had been trained only to come out when Playcare was in night mode to distribute the Red Smoke.

So that meant he had to move.

DogDay started walking, trying to ignore how eerie the silence was. The cable car in and out of Playcare was right across from the gas production zone. Hopefully, it was still in working order.

He nearly laughed in relief when he found it, and the doors opened for him once he flipped the levers. Yes! It still worked! It was child’s play to hop on in and sit down, letting the cable car begin to move by itself.

Thankfully, Elliot’s spiel about Playcare and smiles didn’t play when the cable car was going up. DogDay just relaxed, watching Playcare grow smaller and smaller. A little hint of movement, right in the school’s windows, however, made him squint. Hang on, had that been one of the Miss Delight teachers?

Before he could question it, Playcare was swallowed up by the red transition lights. DogDay pulled away from the window and decided to not question it. The kids came first.

As he hoped, nobody was hanging out in the entrance to Playcare. Even better, the train was there!

DogDay, however, didn’t go into the head car, where the driver would sit. Instead, he headed to the caboose. A lever needed to be flipped whenever the train needed to go backward, like now, because the tracks ahead were blocked by rubble. The door to the caboose opened easily with some lockpicking, revealing the massive amount of controls and such that all went into controlling the train, including the lever. Hopefully, Poppy knew the master train code. DogDay flipped the switch and heard the train whistle. He hopped out and yanked himself into one of the passenger cars before the train started to move.

“Easy.”

Now he had to just sit and wait in darkness like the elevator. DogDay settled into one of the seats. Now that he was alone with his thoughts again, he wondered what the other critters were doing. Would he ever see them again? No, he shook his head, those were bad thoughts. Of course he would see them again! The others were fine, probably a little worried, but would be distracted with caring for the children.

Bubba was probably teaching afternoon classes now. Picky Piggy was probably making lunch for the children while Bobby cared for the younger kids. Hoppy and KickinChicken, if they weren’t arguing about sending him out, were probably planning some fun games for recess. CraftyCorn was busy working on her mural. The thought of the unicorn sent a shiver down DogDay’s spine. Hopefully, if CraftyCorn snapped again, the others would be able to keep her from hurting anyone.

He pushed back his concern when the darkness, once again, was interrupted by light. The Game Station was up ahead. DogDay tensed at the thought. Would the train stop here?! Did they need to push the brakes manually? He glanced out the window, trying to figure it out. The train was slowing down, so hopefully, he could jump out if-

The wheels screeched as the train came to a rolling stop. The car jolted. DogDay let out a sigh of relief. Oh thank the Lord, the train stopped on its own-

"Oh~?"

The moment he heard the sickly sweet croon, DogDay hit the floor, his relief blocked out by terror.

Mommy Long-Legs was best described as a mixed bag. In the early days, she had been kind to the Smiling Critters. DogDay could remember her hands on his, helping him learn how to walk. As the years passed, however, her focus grew more and more on the children. She had once nearly ripped Bobby's arm off for making a little girl throw a tantrum for not having the bear's sole attention on her. Her mental state hadn't improved after the Hour- in fact, according to rumors, it had gotten worse, with Mommy making any adults still alive or trapped run the Game Station gauntlet for lack of being able to watch the kids play.

He was surprised that she hadn't come looking for the children after the Hour.

If she caught him, with no humans available to play with... DogDay didn't even want to think about it.

He held his breath. Outside, he could hear the squeaks of elastic-plastic moving around, circling the train. "Now, who did this?" Mommy crooned from somewhere near the head of the train. "Hello~?"

Silence.

"Hm. It must've been a power failure," Mommy sighed. He could hear her shuffle her feet as if waiting for him to pop up just in case. "Oh well." Slowly, the plastic squeaks moved away with the creaks of metal as Mommy disappeared into the upper levels.

DogDay counted to ten.

When fifteen had passed, he sat up. The Game Station was empty and silent in the darkness. He took a deep breath and hopped out of the window, landing on the stage. He waited, just for another five seconds, before sprinting off the stage and into the Station.

Behind him, he could hear the lights flick on with the movement, but he was out the door before he could hear Mommy's confused noise. He flipped the lever to close the door behind him, just in case.

The next room held a series of doors. DogDay slid the Game Station's passage door behind him once again, before looking around. The slides for the upper management were there. (He ignored the pang that hit his heart when he saw Elliot's name.) Now, there had to be stairs…

Yes! There!

DogDay reached out and winced at the clink of the lock. Oh, great, of course, it was locked. He reached into his satchel to pull out Picky Piggy’s reliable lockpicking kit. He pulled out the tools and turned back to the lock, reaching out. It was child’s play to spring the lock from there, allowing DogDay access. So far, so good.

DogDay took a deep breath, closed the door behind him, and started up the stairs.

He failed to notice the little eyes peeking out at him from the lower floors, not until he heard a chirp. DogDay glanced down and felt his heart sink. The Wuggies beamed up at him, revealing their sharp teeth.

"Oh no."

DogDay took a step back. The lead Wuggy, a small blue one that resembled Huggy Wuggy, took a step forward. It seemed like a signal for all the Wuggies to let out one loud hiss. That was enough for him.

He turned and bolted up the stairs.

A loud screech sounded out behind him like a war siren, followed by the sound of rapid but very small footsteps. DogDay glanced down and nearly peed himself at the sight that greeted him.

Wuggies, what looked like thousands of them, were all chasing him. Most were down on all fours, chasing him like a dog would chase a mailman. And, yes, DogDay understood the irony. He was more focused on the Wuggies who could somehow climb the walls and were launching themselves at him. He turned and swung out with the satchel, knocking them away.

Stairs stretched up and up, but DogDay could see the door ahead! Pain shot up his ankle. He cried out and kicked out, sending the Wuggy who had gotten too close back into the crowd. But they were all drawing closer and closer, too close for comfort.

DogDay needed to get them away, hopefully distract them so they didn't chase him and Poppy.

The door was where he came to a stop, turning. The Wuggies came to a stop, pinning him to the door. They didn't attack. They probably knew that they didn't need to. DogDay was trapped.

"Back off." DogDay hefted his bag up as a makeshift weapon. "Back off, and I promise I won't tell Poppy!"

That didn't work as well as he hoped. Some did flinch at the doll's name, but none of them backed off. He thrusted his bag at them. "I said, back off-"

A Wuggie launched up at him. DogDay screamed, especially when the Wuggy landed on the bag. However, instead of using their position to dig into his flesh, it instead dug into the fabric of the satchel.

DogDay swung, sending it howling away, but a thought occurred to him. He turned to the crowd. None had approached to provide back up, instead staring at him and growling.

"Is this what you want?" DogDay said, holding out the satchel. Most of the Wuggies' eyes followed the bag, while a few stared firmly at him. Until he reached inside blindly, hearing the squish of an organ and pulling it out. Now all of their eyes were locked on his bag. "Here... here, it's all in here!" Stuffing the organ back in the satchel, DogDay threw it down the stairs. "DogDay says fetch!" 

The Wuggies turned and ran back down the stairs in one heaving mass, just like when they were chasing him. DogDay sighed in relief, leaning against the door.

At least, until the door opened and sent him sprawling.

"Owwww." DogDay managed to stand, looking around as he closed the door behind him. He didn't notice the click of the lock as he looked around, feeling a smile lighten up his features.

Great! He was now in the hallway that led to Elliot's office! He glanced behind him. There was an open door, revealing a massive pit that must've been the slides. For good measure, DogDay trotted over and shut the door.

Now, Elliot's office was up ahead. He just needed to…

Jump this giant pit, apparently.

DogDay came to a stop, staring at the pit that he knew, for a fact, wasn’t there before. There were no signs of a floor. With his luck, it probably dropped all the way back to Playcare. But, hey! There was a Grabpack handle clear in the ceiling. DogDay could use one of the Grabpack hands in...his...satchel…

"Oh no." He patted his side, just in case he made a mistake. Nope. No satchel with food, Picky Piggy’s lockpicking kit, tools, or the Grabpack hands. He had just tossed everything down several flights of stairs. “Ohhh no.”

No!

There was no way he could just stop, right here! He was right next to Elliot's office! He was so close to Poppy's backdoor that he could smell Poppy's poppy flower scent! How would the others react if he came back empty-handed?!

DogDay looked around. There had to be a way! He couldn't stop here!

He went back, looking around. Nothing met his eyes. The door across the door he had used to get in was locked. In the room before the giant pit room, there was nothing except a ladder, still open as if the worker doing work on the vent had simply walked away.

"Hmm..." It sounded insane and his inner voice, which sounded a lot like Bubba, screamed at him not to do it.

DogDay grabbed the ladder, closed it, and made his way back to the pit. He stopped at the very end of the room and took a deep breath in, letting it out slowly.

"One..." He tensed up as if he was about to race Hoppy. "Two... Three!" He took off like a shot with a battle cry, holding the ladder over his head. He slammed the feet of the ladder right at the edge of the pit and threw himself up and over.

For a second, he was flying.

The next, his stomach was aching as he slammed into the edge.

Behind him, the ladder fell. DogDay was too busy desperately grasping at the edge, trying to find something to hold onto. His feet desperately kicked out, his toes reaching out to find any way to support him.

DogDay yelped as he slid down farther, desperately grasping even harder. His feet kicked out even harder until pain laced up his foot, joining his ankle.

Wait, was that... He searched out. It was! A piece of metal, barely jutting out from the wall! He stood on his tippy toes as best he could. Thankfully, the metal didn't fall away when he put the weight of his feet on the metal. He searched with his hands. All he could find was the edge, the tiles digging into his palms.

It would have to do.

Channeling Hoppy, DogDay squatted as best as he could, took another deep breath in and out, and jumped.

The metal fell away with a clang, but DogDay's upper half was up. He scrambled away on his hands and elbows, his knees sobbing when they managed to get on solid ground. DogDay collapsed a few inches from the pit, panting for air that didn't seem to be entering his lungs.

...hopefully, there was a spare GrabPack nearby. DogDay did not want to try that jump again with Poppy in tow.

He sighed and got to his feet, his entire body aching. He stumbled to the gate, which was pushed up easily. He glanced down and sighed at the sight of Elliot’s red door.

Wait, that meant…

DogDay straightened, looking down the hall. 

There it was! The back door!

DogDay felt a relieved laugh punch out of his mouth as he shot down the hallway and grabbed the doorknob. Once he got Poppy, they could find a Grabpack and the skeleton code to the train, get back down with the train, get everyone, and get out. If they timed everything right, they could avoid the bigger toys, and the smaller toys would be scared away from Poppy.

He could see the ending!

He just needed to-

He threw open the door.

The scent of lavender hit his nose before the red of the Red Smoke engulfed his vision. DogDay took a deep breath before he could stop himself, and the hysterical laughter was already coming out.

His muscles went slack, and he collapsed onto the floor, just like his heart.

He could see the doors to the case room, just there, only a few feet away. More importantly, he could see CatNap stare down at him, Red Smoke leaking from his mouth. Over his shoulder, he could see the hulking monstrosity of the Prototype.

His eyes grew heavy. A ringing began to hit his ears, mixing with his own hysterical laughter, and voices drifted in and out.

"...take care...I promise..."

"I trust...need a... legs..."

Before he drifted off to sleep, he felt a hand wrap around his ankle.

–_-

DogDay’s mouth tasted like he ate shit.

It was harsh language, but it was the best way to describe the taste in his mouth as he slowly woke up. He blinked and stiffened. Darkness surrounded him. Where was he? Why was the bunker dark? Bubba had made sure the generator didn’t run out…

Oh. Wait.

Memories trickled in. Picky Piggy giving him the satchel of food, riding the train, evading Mommy and the Wuggies, somehow making that jump, opening the back door to Poppy’s apartment…

The Prototype. CatNap. 

It took a moment, but DogDay's eyes eventually adjusted to the darkness.

Padded colorful walls met his eyes, as well as...cells?

"Oh no."

No, no, no... no! He couldn't be back here! He couldn't! The only good thing the Hour of Joy had given the Smiling Critters was the opportunity to be free from this place! DogDay tried to launch himself forward and run, but something yanked him back as a wave of pain washed over his lower half.

"Wh...wha..."

DogDay looked down first. He wished he hadn't.

His legs were gone. His entire lower half had just been… ripped off. He could see his organs practically spilling out. The only reason why they hadn't, as far as he could see, was due to the tight belt wrapped around his waist as a makeshift tourniquet. That would explain the pain. He looked up before he could see if he could throw up.

The first thing he saw was the chains spreading his arms apart. The second was CatNap.

Before he could scream, a paw wrapped tight around his mouth, cutting off the noise. CatNap lowered down the rest of the way with the rest of his limbs, finally settling down in front of him.

"You're lost," CatNap spoke in a whisper. "You are not with the children."

“I had to,” It was his first instinct. DogDay, the part of him that desperately wanted to be the happy leader, wanted his friend back. “You know this isn’t a sustainable situation.”

"I told you, the Prototype will take care of us," CatNap said back, cutting down DogDay's hopes. "You need just put your trust in him." How many times had he said that? It was enough for DogDay.

"The Prototype doesn't give a damn about the kids!" DogDay tried to launch himself forward, only to be held back by the chains. "He hasn't been taking care of them these past three years, we have!" Guarded by CatNap, yes, but still.

Silence.

DogDay continued. He needed to figure out a way out, but he was too angry. "He's a monster! So were you! You killed everyone, even those who didn't deserve it!" So many workers had no idea of the sinister plans of Playtime Co. How many of those workers had been through the treatment, like them? "You don't feel anything for them?!"

CatNap stayed silent, cocking his head.

"Say something!"

As he wished, CatNap spoke. "You judge," CatNap mused. "But you partook in the Hour of Joy, for all your judgment."

Oh. DogDay didn't know CatNap knew about that. "That- I wasn't in control- I didn't want to-"

"You did. You wanted to kill Stella, deep down."

It hurt. It hurt because it was the truth. Barely an hour before the Hour started, DogDay had listened to Stella stagger through an excuse to not release another child away from the chopping block. The parents had been furious, and DogDay had been furious because he knew the child would have been happy.

Stella knew about the surgeries. The Initiative. Everything. DogDay could not remember his own name, his own face, but he knew one thing. Stella had known and did not give a damn about any of it. Sure, maybe she had once cared about the children under her care, but she had just cared about her own skin at that point.

And then DogDay had woken up to her screams, his hidden teeth burying themselves in her throat, as the world ended.

He had left Stella there. She had still been alive, with her eyes wide and hands desperately grasping, but DogDay had left her there to die alone. The other Smiling Critters had assumed that he had been attacked when he got to the evacuation site.

He had never changed their minds.

"You judge me, my dearest friend," CatNap was purring, hard enough that DogDay could feel it through the grip on his face. "But you understand, better than the others. It is why you are here."

"What...What does that mean, it's why I'm here?" CatNap was silent, allowing DogDay's mind to wonder. "CatNap." he finally said. "Tell me, what does that mean?"

"We know where the bunker is," CatNap's voice ground against his nerves. "We cannot trust the heretics to care for the children anymore, if you could so easily abandon them. But I am sure you can be convinced, even if the others are lost." CatNap leaned forward, rubbing his cheek against DogDay's cheek, even as the dog went still with realization. A claw traced the belt that wrapped firm around his waist. "You have already given an offering to the Prototype."

What...what had he done?

"You will stay here, my dearest friend," CatNap said, either not realizing or not caring for DogDay's horror. DogDay was willing to bet, with his rising horror, that he didn’t care. "At the end of everything, it is just you and me."

The Playcare was silent that night, excluding CatNap's purring and DogDay's sobs.

Inside her case, Poppy slept, tears rolling down her cheeks as her only rescue attempt fell apart.

In a home hours away, an angel, unaware for another seven years, said goodnight.

[drabblesandimagines]

Good Days & Bad Days

Pairings: Sebastian/reader, Sebastian/farmer

Word count: 1,086

You’d got into the habit of waking a few minutes before your alarm clock. You guessed your circadian rhythm had finally synced itself to the early morning starts. You didn’t mind as long as it wasn’t ages before, but a few minutes was perfect as it meant to you could turn it off before it rang and woke up Sebastian.

It had taken your husband a few months to settle into your early morning routine when he moved onto the farm. He was much better at not going to bed late into the night, but it wasn’t necessary for him to join you at your 6am wake-up call so you did try your best not to disturb him too much when you got up. On occasion, he did get up to make you a coffee before sneaking back to bed but that was fine by you. Although the farm was large, you’d found a good routine to your mornings and you could get most of your everyday tasks done before 10am and have more of the afternoon for other things.

You turned off the alarm and crept out of bed, throwing on your dungarees as quietly as you could for the morning’s graft – you’d take a shower when you were done for the day. You’d checked the weather report the day before and it was meant to start off drizzling before heavy rain settled in early afternoon so you didn’t think any of the animals would be interested in leaving the comfort of the barn, but you’d at least give them the opportunity…

You returned to the house just after nine, calling it time for a coffee break. As you predicted, the animals seemed pretty cosy in their respective buildings and had shown no interest in leaving. You’d giving them all their morning pet – Sebastian had been amazed you could remember which ones you still needed to greet – milked the cows and collected the eggs, done a bit of weeding and got even harvested some vegetables. You had your eyes set on repairing some of the crumbling fence posts but you definitely needed a coffee before you started wielding a hammer.

You were surprised to see Sebastian wasn’t in the kitchen yet and you peeked through the door to see a lump in the bed, huddled under the covers.

You made two cups of coffee and carried them through to the bedroom, placing his mug carefully on his bedside table.

“Morning, sweetheart.” He greeted from underneath the covers, giving you a small fright as you thought he was sound asleep.

“Oh! Morning – I didn’t think you were awake yet. Coffee’s hot.”

“Mm.” He grunted in response, but he didn’t emerge.

“You okay in there?” You sat on the edge of the bed, clutching your own mug of coffee in your hands.

“I just… I just feel like sleeping today.” The lump in the cover mumbled.

“Oh, one of those days, huh?” You squeezed what you thought was a limb – not sure if it was a leg or an arm. “That’s okay, Seb. It’s gonna be a pretty miserable afternoon out there so I don’t think I’ll have a ton to do once that rolls in, but I can go into town and let you sleep.” Sebastian had been honest about his down days from the start of your relationship – they weren’t frequent and usually after some reassurance he had his day and the next was better.

His head popped out under the covers, well, enough to reveal his eyes at least under a mop of bedhead.

“I wouldn’t say no to you joining me back in bed.”

“Oh, yeah?” You smiled, “Hey, we could play video games in bed too, it’s been ages since we’ve done that.” A few months ago, on a trip to Zuzu City, you’d picked up a secondhand games console with some games that you could play as a two or four-player when Sam and Abigail had come round, and a copy of Frogger especially for Sebastian. On your return home, you’d dragged the TV right up to the edge of your bed, plugged in the console and you’d both gamed long into the evening. “And there’s pizza in the freezer. Only if you want to do all that, though.” You quickly added, realizing you’d gone off on a slight tangent of Sebastian’s bed day request.

“No, that sounds nice. Can we do that?”

“Of course we can, Seb. Whatever you want.” You took a big gulp of your coffee. “Mm, I’ll get all the important stuff done before this rain heads in and then take a shower, but then we can do whatever you want.”

“Thanks, sweetheart.”

You kissed his forehead as he stayed buried under the covers. “Go back to sleep if you want, don’t worry about the coffee.”

“Hmm. Are you saying that because you want another cup?”

“Shush, you! I’ll have you know this is my first, actually.” You took another big gulp, “Right, back to the grind. See you in a bit!”

--

A few hours later, you had showered and dressed in a clean pair of pyjamas and treated yourself to a mid-afternoon nap cuddled up with your husband. Early evening, you’d cooked the pizza and brought it back into bed – cheesy crumbs be damned - before setting up the television and games console at the end of it. It had started off as friendly competition at first, but now you found yourselves competitively nudging each other as you battled through Jumino Kart. You got slightly ahead at one point and suddenly a hand was held over your eyes, leaving you blind as you mashed the buttons in desperation.

“Sabotage!”

You pulled his hand down, only to find he was now further ahead than you and soared past the checkpoint. The screen displayed “Player 1 wins!” and he stuck his tongue out at you as you folded your arms and glared.

“There’s no honour in a cheater’s victory.” You protested.

“Oh, and you blocking my view the last round was totally above board.”

“That’s my handicap as a newer Jumino Kart player.”

“Uh-huh…” Sebastian smirked, before he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you down onto the bed onto his chest in a hug. “Thank you for today, sweetheart.”

“That’s okay, I enjoyed it too.” You cuddled into his chest. “I love you - good days and bad days.”

“I love you - good days and bad days,” he repeated, kissing you on top of your head.

PS: I'm taking requests! Check out my Requests post for further info <3

[ofstoriesandstardust]

go gentle into that good night (j.h.s.)

a/n: as always, this is for my dearly beloved @cottagecori for letting me ramble and explain and talk through ever angsty idea i have ever had.

summary: The tale of two parties

second star to the right (and straight on 'til morning)

warnings: rumored cheating, existential crisis, miscommunication, angst, swearing, alcohol mentions

word count: 1.4k

You always forget how much cooler it is out here by the ocean. 

It’ll still be a few more months before anyone outside of seasoned surfers will brave the darkened water crashing onto the shore a ways out, but for now it’s calm and quiet as the cooler temperatures keep tourists away. 

It's something your friends have taken advantage of as you sit around the firepit, hot dogs roasting and music and laughter echoing all around you. The salt in the air is strong and you lean closer into Jake as a strong breeze runs through. 

The shiver that runs down your spine has nothing to do with the bite of the wind. 

They’re all talking about their next steps, what comes after graduation, and your stomach turns at the thought of confessing that you don’t actually know. 

The conversation you’d had with Pete earlier in the day while you’d waited for Bradley to dig through his parent’s garage for beach chairs plays on a loop, drowning out the words of your friends. 

“It’s okay not to know what you’re doing!” Pete says with a laugh. 

You worry at your bottom lip before sighing. “I just… everyone I know has these cool job offers or grad school acceptances they’re flaunting on social media, and I feel like I’m… falling behind.” You admit quietly. “Is this all I’m ever gonna be?” 

Pete’s face falls at that. “Listen to me. You are incredibly intelligent. You have a very bright future ahead of you, even if that might be hard to see that right now. There are so many people in your life who are supporting you and rooting for you. You’ll figure it out, even if it takes you a little bit longer than others.” Pete pauses. “What are Jake’s plans?” 

You shrug. “I think he’s expecting me to come with him wherever he goes.” 

Pete pulls a face, full of emotion you aren’t sure you understand. “What?” 

He hesitates. “It’s probably not my place, you both are my students-” 

“What?” You insist. 

“I just don’t want to see you confine your future for somebody else. I meant it when I said when you were one of the smartest students I have ever taught. You have the whole world at your feet. And I just… don’t want to watch you give that all up for somebody who might not be with you in five years time.” 

A call of your name startles you back into the present and you blink, realizing Bob is asking if you have any plans for after graduation. You groan, covering your face. “Please don’t ask me that.” 

Jake nudges you. “Don’t you want to go to grad school?” 

“Yes, but I also want to take some time off. I guess, I don’t know. Can we please stop asking me about this and talk about something else?”

Javy lets out a little chuckle. “Hey, worst comes to worst, you can always be a wag.” 

You blink. “A what?” 

“A wag! It’s like a slang term for wives and girlfriends of football players.” 

“So like... a trophy wife?” 

“Kind of-” 

“Machado, you say this like she’d want to be stuck with Seresin for that long.” 

Jake’s eyes narrow at Bradley. “Bradshaw-” 

“Okay, I’m tired of this, we’re moving on.” Natasha cuts the boy off with a roll of her eyes. “Who wants another drink?” 

Natasha begins to pass out more cans from the cooler as you tuck yourself further into Jake. Another shiver goes down your spine as you wrap your arms around you. 

“Are you cold?” Jake asks, leaning down to whisper in your ear. “Do you want to go?” 

You shake your head. “No, I’ll be fine.” 

Jake nods, eyes searching yours before pulling his arm tighter around you as he rejoins the conversation. 

And I just… don’t want to watch you give that all up for somebody who might not be with you in five years time.

-

The knock at your door is quickly followed by a call from Jake. 

His beaming face in his contact photo appears as you hear him knock again. You answer the call with a click, smiling lazily as you turn down the volume of M*A*S*H* on your screen. 

“Hello?” 

“Let me in.” Jake’s words are almost a borderline whine. 

You hum, pretending to think about it. “I don’t know, I’m doing research.” 

He huffs. “You’re just watching M*A*S*H* again, aren’t you?”

“Hey, it’s relevant to my topic.” 

He huffs again. “Please.” 

You roll your eyes and hang up the call before slipping your blanket and laptop off of you and onto the couch. You pad over the front door of your apartment, pulling it open to see Jake. 

His smile blooms at the sight of you as he stumbles forward to give you a hug. You stumble a few feet back with all his weight pressed against you. “Jesus, you’re a clingy drunk.” You mutter, wrapping your arms around him as you try to find your balance. “You’re supposed to be at Bradley’s party.” 

With the conclusion of the baseball season (and his parents out of town), Bradley had thrown a party at his parents. You’d opted out of the evening to stay home and do homework, which had ultimately ended up with your scrolling through social media and doing very little work. 

Jake hums into your shoulder and you can feel the outline of his smile. “But I wanted to see my girl.” 

“You could’ve seen me tomorrow.” 

“Tomorrow me will be hungover.” 

“And drunk you thought it would be a good idea to come all the way over here?” 

“Of course I did. I love you.” 

The words Jake uses makes your breath catch in your throat. 

Not that he loves seeing you or that he loves spending time with you, but that he loves you. 

“Jake, I-” You swallow, unsure of what to say to him in response. 

You’re sure that your feelings for Jake had evolved to love, but you weren’t sure if he reciprocated them and certainly had not expected for him to say them first. 

And you certainly hadn’t expected it to be while he was drunk, whiskey scent strong on him. 

Jake, however, does not seem to sense the gravity of his words as he pushes himself off of you and wanders into your apartment. You shut the door behind him, still feeling a bit dumbfounded. 

“Hey, do you have any- Found it!” you follow him into your kitchen, where Jake is triumphantly holding a jar of Nutella. 

“Jake, you don’t even like Nutella.” The blond frowns at the jar, as if he’s trying to remember if that’s true. “Why don’t you just come sit on the couch with me?”

Jake abandons the jar without a second though, plopping himself down on the furniture. You let out a sigh, feeling all kinds of off-kilter before moving your laptop to the coffee table before slipping back underneath the blanket and holding it up for Jake. 

It takes some shifting and adjusting but he ultimately ends up sprawled out on your couch, head resting against your thigh. 

“This is a good episode.” He murmurs and you glance back up at the TV. After watching for a few minutes, you realize it’s the episode where Hawkeye and Trapper are replacing Henry’s desk. 

You let out a chuckle. “It is.” 

Jake hums against your skin. “I love you.” He whispers on a breath out, so quiet you’re sure you aren't meant to catch the words. 

It makes your heart stop again as you wonder if you’re meant to say them back. 

Not like this. Not when he won’t remember come tomorrow. 

-

The volume of the TV is soft, the laugh track quiet as Jake’s breathing slows. He’s fallen asleep against your thigh, you realize, as your fingers gently card through his hair. 

Your phone buzzes from underneath your leg and you’re careful to not disturb Jake as you adjust to pull it out. You smile softly as his features soften as you begin to scratch his scalp. 

That smile fades as you squint at the text preview on the screen in front of you. 

hey, i’m really sorry to be the one to tell you this but i think it’s better if i tell you before you hear about it from someone else

You frown, feeling your fingers slow in Jake’s hair as you quickly unlock the device, opening it to your text thread with Bradley. 

The bubble pops up a few times as the TV goes to commercial before you mute it entirely. 

When you look back at your phone, your stomach drops at what awaits you. 

there’s a rumor going around jake hooked up with another girl at the party tonight

and i think it might be true

i’m really sorry

[milksuu]

Hii! This is my first time sending a request haha! Well, could you Heartsteel Aphelios with Reader who’s a hardcore Gamer?

(I mean, like ungodly amounts of hours on a multitude of games. Always hitting new high scores. And the classic, eyebags from lack of sleep.)

⌜heartsteel!aphelios x fem!reader⌟ ╰ ❝ YOU CAN'T WIN A GIRLFRIEND IN A 1 V 1 ! ❞

❥ prompt: Aphelios thought there wasn't a single soul in the entire universe stupid enough to challenge him to a 1v1. But apparently, the 'God of Gaming' thought to use their last brain cell to bet their final testament. Little did you know, you'd fall from grace, then forced to play in some idols sick twisted game of pay-back. ❥ content/warnings: enemies to lovers vibe, affectionate bullying, name calling, teasing, fake relationship, fluff (?), 100% emotional dmg ( + crit. bonus on reader)

░꒱♡‿ִ₊˚→ 'GOD OF GAMING'....that's what they call you. An immortal being born to play and dominate the realm of video games in all facets. Sleep's inevitably for the weak and uncommitted. It's a mark of honor to wield dark, heavy under bags beneath your eyes, so long as it meant keeping your rightful place on the throne.

Even in the realm of FPS, no one dares contest your dominance on top of the leaderboard. It's impossible for anyone who even thinks to get more than three hours of daily sleep. Until this night, at the deathly hour of 3 A.M on a Tuesday, an unknown player sweeps in announced. First round on top was a newby flook. You were busy taking a few breaks in game to sip on your energy drink. Second time, the damn bastard is kill stealing from even your weakest team mates. Third time he makes top of the leaderboards...now that's a personal attack on your reputation.

It's not long till various social tweets race like wildfire across all media platforms. Nothing more than constant jabs and reminders of how fickle your place is in this revolving door of a world. It makes you crinkle your fifth can of gamer fuel. There's only one way to respond to this usurper trying to contest your territory.

░꒱♡‿ִ₊˚→ APHELIOS sits back in his chair, tapping a finger on his desk. He narrows his eyes against a blaring screen. Who even was this? He had no clue. All he can recall is playing some random game out of boredom, then a monsoon of social tweets pestering him and some other guy who likes gaming. Maybe a little too much, he suspects.

He does his own social media rummaging, scuffing at his findings. You practically live inside your room, dedicating your whole life to playing video games. Apparently, it's your entire livelihood. He doesn't envy you one bit; pity is the better word that comes to mind. Your entire aesthetic is wearing an oversized hoodie that covers everything (probably your man boobs), and even your face. Except for your eyes. Holy hell, those eyebags were heavier than Sett's banana hammock on a hot summer's day.

Lazily, he opens up his calendar; checking event dates, rehearsal dates, fan meet dates. Tomorrow's his only free day for the week. Luckily for you, that's the one day you demanded from him. And of course some holed-up undesirable would ask another guy to challenge him at a internet cafe. No big deal. He'd set aside a few minutes to put you in your place. Then, completely forget about your entire existence the next day.

Aphelios accepts the challenge and locks in the date. When the day of divine retribution comes, he shows up twenty-minutes before hand. He purposely waits in front of the internet cafe you chose. Only to enjoy the sight of watching some idiot (you) sweating in a hoodie, barely able to catch your breath before you stood at his feet. Oddly enough, something different turns the corner. Eye-catching, even.

"Hey. Looks like you didn't chicken out on me," you comment, brushing away your done up hair from your shoulder. "Guess I'll give you kudos for that."

Aphelios does a double-take, trying to process the image of you online to what's standing in front of him. From his perspective, you look every bit of a model that just stepped out of a photo shoot. Where did those bags go? Man boobs? No, girl boobs? Was being reversed cat-fished a thing?

(Imagine the power of a whole eight hours of sleep and wardrobe change)

You quirk a brow at his silent, mile-long stare. "Um, yeah. Let's make this quick. I have plans to go shopping after this. So I want to get this over with so I can get on with my day. Sound good to you?"

Before he can respond, you brush pass him, slipping through the doors behind. Blinking away his sense of whiplash, Aphelios follows. It's not surprising to find a group of fans swarming and buzzing around the entire place. He's still stun-locked by your unexpected appearance. Observing as you go about in graceful fashion, greeting and hugging those in support of you.

"How about we make a deal before we start," you approach him again, placing your hands hotly on your hips. "I win, and you announce on all your social media platforms that I'm the better player. And your terms?"

Aphelios pauses. He made a hasty assumption. Thinking you were some guy living like a wall rat inside his own apartment. The slight margin of error has his lips curling in the most sadistic fashion. This was going to work out much more in his favor. And there's no intention of letting you off so easily. Being an attractive girl was never a default for mercy. He pulled out his cell, and typed the following:

If I win, you have to be my girlfriend for a month.

░꒱♡‿ִ₊˚→ YOU READ the words out loud, and the whole atmosphere cuts to silence. Your mouth trembles, before you burst with laughter as does the rest of the room. Clutching your cramping stomach, you swat the air in frantic motions. "Y-You can't be serious," you say with attempts to catch your breath. "You think you're going to win? That's so funny. How embarrassing for you. To think you'd even have a single chance to date me." Calming your breaths, you send him one final death glare and spit out the word. "Delusional."

Walking to take your seat, you ignore his unfaltering gaze trailing you. There's a glint in his eyes that tells you he's enjoying whatever hamster wheel is spinning inside his head. You need to add the poor hamster is obviously sick, forced into labour and probably part of a lab experiment.

When the match starts, no one feels the need to invest too much into the game. You were, after all, the 'God of Gaming'. It wasn't going to be a fair match to begin with. Until the game ends before anyone can blink twice; especially you.

The rule to win the round was simple; land the first headshot. Needles to say, you didn't.

Your eyes widen against the screen. Your death screen pops, and your lifeless body collapses. Adding unnecessary amounts of salt in the wound, your scumbag of an opponent crouches over your head. Repeatedly. Your trembling vision shifts away, past your monitor to the opposite side. Slowly, Aphelios leans casually into view, a cocky eyebrow cinched high into his forehead.

You grit your teeth, hand tightening into fists that would mark the inside of you palms. Pestering whispers and scandalous talk rise and echo around you. There's no way to escape the shame. You bow your head in defeat. What else can you do? There wasn't any use in fighting. You have to save whatever drop of class and honor you have left. Anything out of pocket, and your whole reputation could crumble. You push yourself away from the desk, pacing to meet your bastard of an opponent on the other side.

"Good...good game," your voice strangles to leave your tight lips. You try hard not to ruin your face with a scowl. Especially when Aphelios stands pretty damn tall, staring down at you like a child that just had good a spanking. Taking out his phone, he shows you some text:

Sure. Guess you would call it a good game. And now that you're my girlfriend, it's only reasonable to go on a date with me. As my reward and all. Those were the terms. Right?

The blood inside your veins boil. You want nothing more than to slap that phone out of his hands, and crush it beneath your heels. You reserve to grinding your teeth. Aphelios merely smiles through a devilish crinkle in his blood moon eyes. And it's now dawning on you; he's made a full-proof plan to make you suffer.

From what I know, girlfriend's hold onto their boyfriends hands. And also call them 'babe' as a loving pet name. Right?

You want to scream at the top of your lungs right now. Holding your breath, you withhold it from your surrounding scrutiny. When he reaches out his hand, you take it tensely. He chuckles when your manicured nails dig aggressively into the skin of his hand.

It’s cute how badly my girlfriend wants to hold my hand. I’d be careful, though. The harder she squeezes, the more I kind of like it.

You gulp and loosen your grip. Honestly, where the hell does he get off saying stuff like that so casually? How humiliating. And it was just the start of your month of impending doom.

Like any ‘proper’ date, he drags you to one of his usual spots in town for a meal. It's odd to witness him take the lead so naturally; as if you really were his damn girlfriend. When he offers to order and pay for the both of you, you almost hesitate. However, you weren't going to turn down a free meal. Even if it came from your current worst enemy.

“Oh. Um…then I’ll have the burger. No pickles.” Aphelios sends you a yard long stare, and you know he's siphoning you for more. You blush, turning a cheek. “Please, b-babe?”

You can tell he leers underneath his mask, like a cat whose gotten his cream. He leaves you briefly, before returning and setting a tray of food in front of you. For a moment, you stare at the hamburger with warranted skepticism. You raise your pair of squinting eyes at Aphelios, whose already pulled down his mask to quietly enjoy his meal. After a beat, you lower your restraints, and slowly take a bite. You immediately stiffen and gag, spitting up into a napkin. There's definitely pickles—loads of them.

Aphelios almost chokes on his own laugher at your award winning expression of disgust. He slides his phone across the table:

Oh. Sorry. I thought you said extra pickles. ㅋㅋㅋㅋ

Freaking bastard! Before you can smack his phone off the table, he snatches it back to the safety of his pocket. With a growl, you slough off the heaps and slices of fermented food. You're able to de-pickle the patty, but there's little joy in eating something with the faint essence of the nastiest condiment.

And after a not-so-enjoyable lunch, he takes you to a nearby pâtisserie for dessert. While waiting, and you have a half a mind to run out. Or call the local circus so they can come get their evil clown back. You're terrified to see what he's planning to bring you. And when he does, your mouth instantly waters. You stare down at a cute, decorative dessert parfait. It looks perfect with no hidden pickles (don't put it past him though). Your eyes glisten at the extravagant layers of yogurt, fruit compote, and whipped cream. Not to mention, the glazed whole strawberries on top, glittering with snow powder sugar. Giddy with excitement, you almost forget the silent devil sitting next to you. Before you can take the first bite, Aphelios intercepts your hand, brings it to his lips, and claims it for himself.

There's only one spoon, you know. And like any good girlfriend, it only makes sense to hand feed her boyfriend. Down to the very. last. bite.

There's a twitch in your face. You really want to dump the whole dessert pile onto his head. Unfortunately, that would be a major insult to the parfait. Exhaling your fury through your nostrils, you belly the desire to murder him with a plastic spoon. Grumbling, you perform your embarrassing 'girlfriend' duty. Nearing the end of this round of torture, he smiles—all at your expense, of course.

Wow. Am I full. Thanks for that. I'm actually feeling kind of generous from all your devoted attention. Tell you what. I'll let you have the last bite.

"Yeah, right," you snort. "Like I would ever share the same spoon with you, let alone anything you've touched on this Earth—hmph!" Before you can finish your berating monologue, Aphelios flips your hand around and slips the spoon inside your mouth.

ㅉㅉ You shouldn't talk with your mouth full. Silly. You might choke. And I rather not have that on my conscious.

You whine, trying to swallow your way through a verbal tantrum. Who knew it'd be so difficult to argue with delicious yogurt in your mouth? Still, reality settles shortly after the sweetness melts from your tongue. A certain thought springs a bitter aftertaste. For all intents and purposes, you both just shared an indirect kiss.

You smack the spoon on the table, feeling your face heat up. Yet, he's just sitting there, sly with composure. Not bothered by any of it—this sick 'fake dating' sims game. It wasn't fair. Nothing about this was fair! How many times did you have such an experience through your dating visual novel games? Too many to count. Yet, despite all those perfect moments with your various 2-D boyfriends, this fake 3-D imposter, just ruined the whole trope experience for you. There was no way you could replay those scenes and not think about your suffering today. You would damn this man to Hell again, but obviously, he enjoys vacationing there.

It was funny when you thought your gruelling date would conclude after dessert. Aphelios made sure to think of various, and random places to drag you to for no good reason. He's perfecting the art of physically and mentally exhausting you. Stroll in the park? He may or may not have put a caterpillar on your head. Watch you freak out about it, and then relish in having you beg him to help you. Lovely time window shopping at an outdoor mall? He makes sure to slip away and watch you panic trying to find him in the mass of busy bodies. Before you know where your head's at, you blink up against lit downtown buildings, store fronts and street lights.

Well, today's been fun. Just one last thing to make this date perfect. Something my girlfriend will definitely love.

An all too knowing smile creases his mask again. Taking your hand, he leads you away to the next destination in mind. With your eyes half-lidded with fatigue and feet already beaten to a pulp by your heels, you force yourself to stop caring. Like everything else, you'll just go along with it and pray it's over soon.

⌜LUV-U ♡ HOTEL⌟

Your mouth drops at the sight of a pink and flickering neon sign a few steps away. Did he really just drag you to a Love Hotel!? You swallow hard. Nevermind, you did care. You cared a lot! "This has to be a joke, right? You're out of your mind if you think I'm going to let you take me inside—"

You're cut short as you're tugged forward. Nearing the entrance, your heart pounds louder than the surrounding nightlife. Your thoughts are racing. And watching another couple walk out looking rather satisfied with their stay doesn't help your emotions at all. That is, until he casually leads you past the hotel and around the corner, where there's vending machine against the wall. He releases his hold and gestures to it.

What are you talking about? Take you inside where? And no. There's no joke about this being the best vending machine in town for canned coffee. ㅎ_ㅎ

You stare with dumbfounded horror as he purchases two cans, and places one in your stiff hands. You look down at your coffee and contemplate just about everything up till this point. How big of a mistake it was to meet someone like him. Worse yet, be at his mercy over a stupid bet you set in place...and actually lost. How did your life turn out this way? Regret and humiliation well up as tears against your eyes. You pinch your bottom lip between your teeth. With the last of your dignity on the line; you'd rather die at this point than cry in front of him.

░꒱♡‿ִ₊˚→ APHELIOS lowers his drink from his lips, watching you from the side of his lashes. Looks like you were at your limit. Maybe he went a little too far. But every bit of his ego wants to rationalize it was well deserved. A pestering knot tightens like a fist at the base of his sternum. It bothers him enough to turn his neutral expression into a frown. His gaze catches your trembling legs, and traces them all the way down to your heels. His eyes widen by a margin; it's insane to think you hadn't complained about your feet hours ago. Looks like that knot wasn't going away anytime soon.

He tosses away your cans and raises his phone:

Take off your heels.

"What?" You're at a complete loss for words. Was he now going to force you to walk barefoot on the gross streets? You shake your head. "No way. Forget it. If you want me to take them off so bad, then do it yourself—Jerk!"

Aphelios flutters his eyelids in annoyance. More so that, for a split moment, he found himself not entirely hating the insult used against him. Forgetting the stupid interruption of his brain, he bends down and starts unlacing your straps. "H-Hey, wait a second you freaking weirdo. I didn't actually mean it literally."

It doesn't take much effort to hoist you onto his back, wrap your arms around his neck, and press your thighs snug against his waist. He anticipates a spit fire reaction. To his surprise, you simply huff and puff out your cheeks, muttering another possible insult. Honestly, he was sure you would've taken this opportunity to choke him out in a headlock. (He would've done it, but glad you didn't).

With a final adjustment, he hands you his cell phone, open with the map application. It seems it takes you a moment to realize he wants you to put your address so that he can dump you back wherever you live.

"You really plan on carrying me all the way to my house?" He can't see your expression, but by delivery alone, he can hear the blush in your cheeks. After a few taps and a mutter, he gets his phone back. "You better delete my address later. Or your new name's going be 'Stalker'."

Aphelios can't help but scuff. Like he would waste any more of his free time on inflating your already big head. He wonders how you even manage to fit your head through any shirt holes.

For a short while, you don't speak. As he walks through more quieter neighborhood streets, he feels your body condense further into his back.

"Mm, you know, for a being a cold jerk...somehow, you feel super warm," you breathe sleepily against his earlobe.

After a mumble or two, you commit to a terribly sleepy idea. Closing your eyes, you place your lips against his neck. Lingering, your mouth is soft and warm against his skin. Slightly sticky from whatever lip gloss you still have left. After the longest moment of his life, you abandon your spot. But he can feel your sleep drunk smile from how close your lips still are.

"Heh, there..I already kissed you, so...now you can't make me do it later....jerk."

When you finally doze off with light breathes and snores, Aphelios comes to a complete halt. It takes a moment to process. Then, without his consent, his neutral complexion flushes bright pink. The spot where you kissed him feels like it's burning a hole straight through him, down to his thumping pulse. He exhales a hot and heavy breath. It's warm enough to puff in the night air. With a shake of his head, he finds his walking pace, continuing towards your apartment.

He refuses to let you sway him with whatever tricks and flirts you have up your sleeve. He wasn't a swoonful idiot like most. And Aphelios knows he has a whole month worth of you still left. He'd make sure you always knew who you were dealing with. And by the end of it all, he'd make sure you'd never be able to get him off your mind.

A brewing smirk lifts one corner of his lips. This game was going to be more fun than he expected. And just like every other game, he would ultimately win.

Too bad for you, he mused to himself.

an;; ahhh thank you all for all your sweet messages i've been receiving through my hiatus. really appreciate it. trying to get back in the swing of things of answering anon. reqs. and working on my cleaning lady fic as well.

ngl, i swear, i hc so hard the phel can be such a sadistic/vengful bitch hell bent ruining anyone's life. like hes so unbothered by things and keeps to himself, that the minute you try to test him in that department, yeah no, you're officially on his shit list for life. how sweet how my man can hold grudge. &lt;3

[footballerimaginess]

Fluff Alphabet | Trent Alexander Arnold

Here is my fluff alphabet, give it some love and feedback please. This takes me a long time to make, so will really appreciate the love on this fic. Let me know what players you want more fluff alphabets on. Word Count: 1,334 ANNIVERSARY - "Happy Anniversary" you smiled as you read the text and sighed also, knowing that you weren't with him today as he was in Europe. You were so upset but when a bunch of flowers arrived at your door, they instantly made your day even better.

BABIES - Whenever you saw a baby, you were so broody. You and Trent had always spoken about babies and how you would love children in the future. You knew he would be the most perfect father whenever you decided to have babies. When the time was ready of course. COFFEE - "We haven't had a coffee date in ages, come on" you smiled as you suggested to Trent as your eagle eye saw a starbucks in the distance and you knew you needed an iced coffee. "You are the worst, anytime we drive past one you need one" you smirked. "Alright, guess you aren't getting one" you laughed as Trent's brow furrowed. "Well we are here now, so I suppose" he teased. DATE NIGHT - Date nights were rare when you dated a footballer, but Trent always had the best ideas for what you did on date night. It was always so special because he put so much effort into your dates it meant so much to you. EXPLORE - One of your favourite things to do was exploring new places, it had been one thing you loved to do. There was so much on this list that you'd both wanted to explore and made sure it was your mission to do so. FLOWERS - One of Trent's ways of showing love was buying you flowers, not really having a reason behind why he got them. But they were always so beautiful whenever he bought them back or got them delivered whenever he wasn't here due to football. He always knew how to brighten up your day even when he wasn't here. GAMES - You loved going to games, whether it was England or Liverpool, you love going to away games on your own and being in the middle of the crowd. It just felt so special supporting your man. HOLIDAY - Holidays were one and the only time seeing Trent in the summer, he always made sure that you would do a lot to try and make up for how much time you missed when the season was happening. You were so excited to spend time with him and having ICKS - The one thing you hated about Trent and was one of your few icks in the relationship. "If you slurp that drink one more time, that straw may be leading somewhere fucking else" you gritted your teeth as he coughed, your comments taking him by surprise. "Woah okay okay" he holds his hands up before gently pushing the glass away from him. JUMPER - "Have you stolen one of my jumpers again? I can't find it anywhere" you turned around as you spoke to him as you had the jumper on. "Oh so you do have it, good job I love you because this is taking the piss now. I love that jumper" he asked you sternly with a straight face. "Well you're not having it back now" you shrugged. KITTEN - You had told Trent that you had wanted a pet, desperately. So when Trent came home with a huge box, you were confused as he placed it in front of you. "Open it" you smiled as you opened the box to reveal the cutest black and white kitten. "Oh my gosh, she is so cute" you whispered as you placed your cat on your chest. LIVERPOOL - You were the biggest football fan before you started dating Trent, so when you would go to games you were just so excited anyway to watch him at Anfield and travelling around the UK and Europe watching the team play. MEETING - You and Trent met at a bar as you walked straight into him, say it was love at first sight. In your mind obviously, not Trent's. But you were too shy to say anything when you bumped into him. But you gradually worked your way over to talk to him more and more. NAME - "So when are you going to be y/n alexander arnold?" the boys asked as you blushed. "I dunno, one day i hope" you shrugged as you watched Trent's facial expression. "Guess you'll just have to wait, gotta keep you on your toes" you laughed as the boys all smirked. "So much love from you there Trent" he laughed. OCEAN - "Come swim with me" you shouted to Trent who was laying on the beach whilst you were standing in the ocean which was looking so beautiful. "You go, it looks so pretty" Trent smiled, shouting away as the beach was so quiet as it was still pretty early.

PAMPER NIGHT - You and Trent were having a pamper night, phones were off (not even allowed to do a sneaky photo for social media because Trent would kill you within seconds that was uploaded). Face masks were always your favourite especially when you had a full collection of them on hand. QUESTION - When Trent popped the question, you thought he was joking when you were on a beach on holiday one summer. You were so shocked when he opened the ring box, taking you completely by surprise. Saying yes of course as you jumped straight onto him as you looked at the ring and grabbed him as tightly as you could. RAIN - Of course the British weather being as awful as it is as always, you stupidly decide to go out for a walk which meant the heavens opened as it usually would. You were absolutely soaked as you ran as fast as you could in the rain. SUNSHINE - You were laying in the sunshine as it hit down onto your chest as hot as he could be. "I could get used to this heat, it feels so glorious. It is a shame that we don't get this weather in England. But it seems lovely" he mumbled as he barely raised a look up as he was enjoying the sunshine.

TRENT - Life with Trent was amazing, working your job was something special you loved working on your photography and getting to do it within football was amazing also. You knew you were so happy with Trent and couldn't wait to experience more life with him. UNDER THE STARS - You and Trent were laying under the stars in your garden, watching the night sky. "I love this, with you" you smiled as you rolled over to talk to him closely. "Me too" Trent whispered gently as he stroked your hair. VICE CAPTAIN - You were so proud of him when he told you that he was becoming vice captain. This was huge for him, especially as he has been at the club for so long. When Trent posted it on his instagram, you were so proud of him and all the fans were too which especially warmed your heart. WEDDING - The wedding wasn't for a while. but you were planning it all and had been for months. It had been a crazy few months, Trent was convinced that you were slowly turning into bridezilla. "We've had so many deliveries, how many things have you got. We are only having one day" you laughed as he was right. But you wanted it to be special. X - The kisses he left you whenever he texted you were always adorable, he was just so cute. YELLOW - "That dress is so beautiful on you, yellow is your colour. Ready" he smiled as he laced your hand in his hand as you headed to the car. You were going to the award ceremony Zzzz - You and Trent were having a lazy day on the sofa after Trent had been having a busy week of training and a midweek European game. All he wanted to do was have a chilled day, laying on the sofa snoozing in and out of sleep.

[brainddeadd]

Heyy I think it would be super cute if u did the fluff prompt 22 with Joseph W. Like maybe he hates sharing drinks with people until the two of u start dating. And the team and their gfs go out for dinner and someone points out how Joey shares his drink with u and that’s how he knows Joey really likes u. Sorry this is so long for no reason lol

Sharing

The restaurant was lively, the sound of clinking glasses, laughter, and casual conversations filling the air. You sat nestled next to Joey in the booth, his hand resting comfortably on your thigh under the table. The Maple Leafs players and their significant others were scattered around, enjoying dinner and drinks after a long week of practice and games.

You were happily sipping from your drink when Joey reached over, plucking the glass from your hand without hesitation. He took a long sip before sliding it back to you, his arm brushing against yours in the process.

You barely thought anything of it, but that was when Mitch Marner leaned across the table with a dramatic gasp. “Did Joey just... drink from your glass?” Mitch’s eyes widened as if he’d witnessed some monumental event. “No way.”

Matthew Knies grinned from the other end of the table, pointing a fork at you. “You’re officially the one now. Joey doesn’t share drinks with anyone.”

You glanced at Joey, confused but amused. “What’s the big deal?”

Mitch snorted. “You don’t get it. Joey’s weird about sharing food and drinks—like, germaphobe-level weird.” He turned to Joey, grinning mischievously. “But you? You get to sip from his glass like it’s nothing.”

Joey rolled his eyes, clearly unbothered by the attention, though a slight pink tinge dusted his cheeks. “It’s not a big deal,” he muttered, trying to wave it off.

“Not a big deal?” Mitch teased, nudging Knies with his elbow. “Dude, this is like... huge. This man didn’t even share a water bottle with me when I forgot mine during practice once.”

You laughed, leaning into Joey. “You really hate sharing that much?”

Joey shrugged, a small, sheepish smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “I guess I don’t mind with you.” He reached for your drink again, taking another sip just to make a point.

The table erupted in playful laughter and teasing, but Joey didn’t seem to care. Instead, he laced his fingers with yours under the table, squeezing gently as his warm smile stayed firmly in place.

You couldn’t help but grin, your heart fluttering at the small but meaningful gesture. Joey might not have been the most expressive guy, but actions spoke louder than words—and this? This was his way of saying I really like you.

And from the way he kept stealing sips from your glass all night, you knew he meant it.

[auseyre]

I'm way too lazy to copy that Marvel What If font rn but...what if

What if Korn took Nampheung, not out of obsession or some freaky desire to attic wife her, but to please his father? I think it’s pretty much a given that his recitation of the shooting events is a lie and that Gun’s is closer to the truth. 

In both versions, though, they are there trying to persuade Nampheung to come home again because their dad is insisting. I’m guessing that since Nampheung has yet another son, their father is ready for her to come back into the fold, bringing her kids with her. Korn kills her husband, obviously to get him out of the way. But I think that he didn’t want even more competition against his own sons for a place in the family. Vegas and Macau were enough. So he brings her and leaves Porsche and Chay behind. 

And then he tells his father the same story he told Gun, but in reverse. Gun freaked out. Gun killed Ted. Gun killed Porsche and Chay because he’s obsessed with Nampheung. Gun tried to rape her. Keep her locked away and safe from Gun. It’s enough to make Gun completely lose favor with his father. Nampheung either tries to kill herself because she thinks her sons are dead as well, or Korn just keeps her drugged up. Now he’s eliminated both rivals for the head of the family in one fell swoop. After his father dies, he keeps her because why not? She’s completely under his control and someday he might need her as a weapon/hostage (turns out he does). 

What if Porsche is actually Gun’s son? Gun doesn’t know it, Nampheung didn’t tell him — I’m thinking one night of passion and her realizing that is she was with him, she’d never escape the Mafia life, or they knew their dad would never allow it. So she just ran off with Pat, who married her to protect her and the baby (maybe he was already in love with her, maybe they fell in love later.) But Korn knows it or at least he’s pretty sure of it. It would explain his interest in Porsche but not Chay, who would presumably be more malleable for Korn’s needs. (I know people have explored this possibility in way more depth than I can).

Yes, I know that would make Porsche and Kinn actual cousins, but look, I’m watching a show where a severed head in a box is considered a gift, and a torture raincoat standard equipment. Every romantic relationship on this show is ignoring the guy on the ship waving blood-red semaphore flags in frantic “danger, Will Robinson” messages. I promise you, my line is not a consensual romantic relationship between two blood-related adults who didn’t even grow up together. 

TBH, I’m just throwing this out here because I want Porsche and Vegas and Macau and Chay to have to navigate an enemies-to-brothers relationship. Porsche and Vegas, two men conditioned to love and protect their brothers, having to deal with their super awkward relationship. Chay and Macau, both used to being the adored baby brother, unable to stifle their resentment and confusion. Heck, they’re still babies, so send them off to camp together so we can have a Parent Trap type bonding situation. Y’all I just want one of those cheesy 80s, defensive “that’s my brother!” moments.

What if Porsche becoming Tankhun’s bodyguard was meant to be a test by both Khun and Korn as well as taking Porsche off of the hot seat for a minute? Korn brings Porsche in, is delighted by his moxie, puts him on the board as an actual player, and then he’s just a disaster who almost gets himself killed by the Minor Family. So, letting him be Tankhun’s bodyguard got him out of the spotlight for a minute, long enough for the Minor family to move on to other grudges. And it was a test to see if he had any ambition, any edge at all. That’s why Korn does not want him to guard anybody else when Porsche suggests it. He passed the test and needs to stay in play. 

Khun sees Kinn’s interest in Porsche. After all, Kinn comes personally to rescue Porsche from his fish-killing punishment. Switching Pete and Porsche protects him from Minor family retaliation(because come on, do we really think that Vegas was gonna let that go? If he hadn’t wanted to use Porsche, he would absolutely have gotten revenge.) It also gives Khun a chance to study Porsche and see if he’s worthy of Kinn’s attention. When he decides he is, he nudges him back toward Kinn ...mentioning the meeting, telling him that Kinn said he was useless and would get killed, eventually “giving” him back to Kinn with the flimsiest excuse. 

@iamcon-fu-sion mentions some of these ideas about the bodyguard situation in their KP rewatch and I was so happy to see that because I constantly think I’m over analysing everything about this show(I mean I’m not gonna stop though). 

What if Ken wasn’t the original mole? What if it was a lower-level bodyguard, and he didn’t betray the main family until Porsche came onto the scene? Maybe he’d already turned down the offer before. Then Big gets hurt and Porsche comes along out of nowhere. By rights, Ken should have moved into Big’s spot, but Porsche stops that, humiliating them in the process. Porsche continually fucks up and yet still fails upward. Sure, they made fun of him being Tankhun’s bodyguard, but realistically, Tankhun has the best bodyguards they have other than Big and Ken. 

Arm and Pete are constantly pulled into other missions because they’re so valuable and talented. Maybe no one wants the job, but it’s still one of the most high-ranking. Then, when Ken does get the head bodyguard job, it’s yanked back out from under him. He has no idea that Porsche is getting all kinds of nepo baby/sugar baby privileges, but whatever is going on is enough to leave him bitter, angry, and betrayed enough to go over to the minor family. 

editing this because where did I get Ted for the Kittisawasd dad? I ...have no idea.

[iamnotoriginalphil]

Hey I’m not sure if your taking prompts at the moment but I was wondering if you could write some thing with Larissa x Reader

Reader has been distant lately but because they are planning on proposing but Larissa thinks something else is going on and shape shifts to spy on R but R knows Larissa so well they can tell it’s her

I hope you enjoy this one, Anon!

“Rissa?’

The man looked up from his newspaper, a confused look on his face. You tilted your head, eyes sweeping over him. Arms crossed over your chest, you stared down at him, waiting for him to admit to what he was doing.

“I’m sorry, I think you have the wrong person,” he said in a gravelly voice.

“I know it’s you,” you said, “you’ve been following me all day.”

And she had.

You’d been walking around town all day, making sure all your plans were perfect for the next night. The bakery had the cake ready for delivery, the violin player was confirmed, and you’d bought a really tasteful table cloth. But you’d noticed her tailing you as a variety of strangers.

You always knew it was her.

No matter what facade she had on, she had a tell. Her fingers would clench every time you caught her eye. It was the exact tell that told you you should ask her on that first date. It was the tell when you’d first kissed her. It was her tell whenever it came to you.

You settled yourself on the bench beside him, turning your body to look at him properly. His brown eyes were staring back, mouth downturned in a frown. You grinned back.

“The florist, the bakery, the young man’s house, a horrible craft shop, the Weathervane, Pilgrimworld, the linen shop, the Weathervane again, and now here,” you said, listing off all the places you’d been, “taffy?”

He stared down at the outstretched paper bag in your hands. You shook it at him. He sighed, plucking a piece of taffy out, and you grinned.

“I really think you have the wrong person,” he said, “I certainly haven’t been to the Weathervane twice today.”

“I might believe you if I didn’t know you so well, sweetheart,” you replied, taking your own piece of taffy, grimacing when you put it in your mouth, “hence why I bought your favourite flavour of taffy even though I hate it.”

He sighed, form slowly shifting back into the woman you were irrevocably in love with. You smiled at her again, shifting closer, plucking the newspaper from her hands. She was staring at you.

“How did you know it was me?” she asked.

“I always know it’s you,” you replied, “so now the question is why you’ve been following me all day while I run errands?”

“Who’s the young man?” she asked in return.

“A fabulous violin player,” you replied, “I’ve hired his services.”

“What for?”

“Well, I was planning on proposing to you tomorrow night, which you might have figured out if you were paying more attention, but I’m guessing you thought something bad was going on,” you said.

“How do you know it’s me?” she asked, “when I’ve shifted into someone else.”

“You do this thing with your hand when I look at you,” you said, “no one else would notice.”

“You’re going to propose to me?”

You shifted even closer to her, gently cupping her cheek until her beautiful eyes were looking at you. Your thumb ran along her cheekbone.

“What did you think was going on?” you asked.

“You’ve been so distantly lately,” she said, shaking her head, “I thought…”

“That I was cheating on you with the young man from the house I visited today,” you said, it all clicking in your head.

“Can you blame me?” she snapped, “you’ve been keeping me at arms length for weeks now, out all hours, keeping secrets. What was I meant to think?”

“Ideally that I’d never cheat on you,” you said, “but I suppose I can’t argue the facts here.”

“So you’re really planning on proposing to me?” she asked.

“If you’d still like that,” you said, “I know I’m nothing but a rotten cheater but I would like to spend my life with you.”

“Alright,” she said slowly, “you can propose to me tomorrow night.”

You smiled, pressing a quick kiss to her cheek. She smiled at you again.

“But only if the ring is really nice,” she warned.

“Oh, you’re going to love it,” you replied, “now let’s go home.”

She stood, holding out her hand to you. Your fingers tangled together and you couldn’t keep the smile off your face.

[mqsi]

bro ur really good a ta writting 👏❤❤❤

anyways can you write smut about fc barca players seeing readers preformance at idk a show for celebs or something ALSO the reader is belly dancing and singing hips don't lie, chantaje and ojos asi ( as if the reader was the original maker of the songs)

thanks love ya

Thank you love, I’ve seen your recent post and I just wanted to tell you that everything is gonna be okay, you’re strong. Here you go, I love you💓

warning: smut

——————————————————————————

You just released a new album, ads and campaings for it were everywhere. You ended up getting an invitation for an event in Madrid. It was meant to gather the young stars in the world from various professions. Some of the Barça players were there as well.

You did a short interview first before the staff led you to a small stage so you can perform a song or two from the album. On your way there you met eyes with a short brunette. You immediately recognized the face. Golden boy, Pedri.

His eyes weren’t leaving yours and you smiled, rushing to the stage.

As you got on, people started gathering around, eager to hear you sing live. Pedri nudged Gavi in the shoulder, whispering something in his ear before they made their way to you.

Music blasted from the speakers as you started singing. The song you chose to do was very dynamic and it needed a good dance choreography to follow. Your hips started moving to the beat, the outfit you were wearing was showing some skin here and there.

At first, you were sceptical about wearing it but the way Pedri was watching you, it seemed like the perfect choice now. His eyes were on your body the whole time. You were enjoying yourself, his gaze was boosting your ego and he knew by the way you smiled at him.

When you finished the performance, people gave you a round of applause. You thanked everyone but the the only thing on your mind was Pedri. You wanted to approach him but your eyes lost his form. You were guessing he had his interviews and what not and just let it be for now.

The rest of the event was quite boring with your thoughts drifting off to Pedri. You were unsuccessful with finding him for the rest of the night. Disappointed, you went back to your hotel only to be met with the person you searched for the entire night. Pedri and Gavi were in the lobby, talking to some people before heading to the elevator.

You weren’t really planning to chase after him but the circumstances gave you no other option. You pretended like you needed to chase the elevator, which was not really a lie after all.

Gavi noticed you running and stopped the doors from closing. You rushed in

“Thank you” and Gavi nodded.

Pedri turned his eyes from the phone and his eyebrows lifted in surprise. He stuffed the phone in his pocket, giving you full attention.

“That was a nice show, you sure know how to dance” he replied, reffering to your quite sensual dancing on stage just a few hours ago.

“Well thank you, you sure know how to stare”

Gavi snorted but soon composed himself as Pedri gave him a warning look.

“I would say you enjoyed my staring skills”

The elevator came to a stop, both boys needing to get off here. You were trying to think of a quick comeback or anything to say to keep talking to him when you heard Pedri whisper in your ear.

“room 268, I’ll be alone in an hour” he said, leaving you shocked and turned on.

An hour passed rather quickly with you taking a shower and trying to find the underwear that match your bra the most,but at the end decided to just go without one. You weren’t really planning to get laid on your trip to a celebrity event but I guess you never know.

You nervously made your way to his door, knocking. Pedri opened, greeting you in a pair of shorts and a basic t shirt.

“I wasn’t sure If you’d actually come” he said, stepping to the side so you can enter the room. He locked the door behind you.

“You’re sharing this room?” You said, placing your phone down as the only thing you brought with you.

“Yes, with Gavi, but he ain’t sleeping here tonight” he said making his way on the balcony. You followed behind him, getting comfortable in one of the chairs. The balcony was pretty high up, giving you a stunning view of the city shining in the night.

“So, what made you come?” Pedri asked, crossing his arms against his chest and leaning against the railing.

You looked up at him from your spot “You”

“Oh yeah? Show me”

You got up from your seat, now standing in front of him. He looked you up and down, a slight smile plastered on his face.

“I mean, not wearing a bra speaks for itself” he said, now looking at your nipples that were visible against the tight tank top.

You stepped closer, one hand pulling apart his from his chest. “Well, I said I came here for you”

Pedri pulled you in by your waist, crashing your lips together in a messy kiss. Hands roaming your body, eventually coming to your breasts, teasing your nipples trough the material. You moaned in his mouth, one hand sneaking down to the bulge in his shorts. You stroked him a bit before sinking down on your knees.

“So needy, aren’t you? Gonna suck my dick here?” he said, pulling your hair from your face.

You smiled up at him, pulling the shorts and boxers down. Cold air on his bare cock made Pedri hiss, urging you to take him in your warm mouth. You gave him a few playful tugs before licking the tip. Soon, your mouth enveloped him, his hands tangling in your hair.

Pedri threw his head back, the wind ruffling his hair. He opened his eyes for a moment, met with the starry sky. You kept sucking him off, enjoying his sounds that were muffled by the streets.

Pedri pulled you back by your hair, breathing heavy.

“As much as I want to cum down your throat, I really want to fuck you as well”

Smirking, you got up and rushed back into the room. Pedri pushed you against the glass walls,kissing down your neck. He made quick work of your clothes, pressing you against the glass. You squirmed from feeing the cold material against your nipples.

All of this made you dripping wet, just waiting for him to fill you up. “Pedri,please”

He laughed behind you, one hand grabbing his cock, pushing it trough your folds, coating him in your juices. You whined when you felt him push in, stretching you out so deliciously. He grunted against your ear.

His hips soon found a steady pace, keeping his hands on your hips, ocasionally gripping them.

“It seems these are not just for dancing, ha?” He said, pulling out and slamming back into you.

You moaned, pushing your ass back, urging him to continue. He pressed your cheek against the cold surface.

“Fuck, you love being fucked like this? Pressed up against the glass? I wonder what would people think If the glass weren’t tinted”

You could only moan his name over and over again, his cock hitting all the right spots. Pedri’s hand went to your clit, working in circles. You could feel tears of pleasure forming.

“Go on, cum for me bonita”

A few more snaps of his hips and you were gone, his strong arms holding you up. He was close himself, thrusts sloppy, chasing the orgasm. Muttering curses under his breath, Pedri came on your ass, smearing the cum with his cock.

You looked back at him from the glass

“I hope there are more events you’re invited to”

——————————————————————————

you didn’t specify who so I chose Pedri, I think he fits this better than Gavi.

a/n: poor Gavi sleeping on the floor at someone elses room so Pedri can fuck

[mapileonxputellas]

Friends Who Became Family (Barca x Reader)

In support of Sara Bjork, my take on the other side of this. Loved writing this. This is quite different from the other ones I write. I started writing this with a specific player in mind as the partner but you can choose whoever you want or read it like this! Wrote in the style of a tribune. TW: IVF, pregnancy loss, pregnancy, depression 3.3k words

Playing football.

Having a baby.

Two things many women dream about all over the world and it is widely accepted if they don’t want to do one or either of those things.

But what if you want to do both? What if you reach the top of your game in football and decide that you want to have a baby? What then? Why should we have to sacrifice one to have the other?

But for that to happen people need to stand up and fight for our rights. People like my wife.

.

We’ve been together for seven years now. We met doing the one thing we both love: playing football. It’s cringy to say but it definitely was love at first sight, at least for me. I caught the eye of an opposition in an international friendly and the rest is history. A DM later than week, followed by months of messaging, millions of miles between us got us to this point.

Just over a year after we decided to make the move together, to join Wolfsburg. Neither of us could speak any German, we didn’t know anyone but with two suitcases and each other we made the move.

After four years together, three living together, it felt like we were ready for the next step. We both wanted to be mothers but we were both aware it wasn’t as simple as that. So we started looking for a donor and IVF. She was going to carry the baby and take a break from football. A decision made by the both of us.

At that point it was almost a near formality for both of us that we would sign a contract renewal but when two of the biggest clubs in the world come calling for you it is hard to refuse.

That meant moving to Barcelona, a new country. All in the middle of a pandemic. All whilst trying to start our family.

We knew this wasn’t going to be simple so when the opportunity came to start the transfers we couldn’t say no.

Our first transfer failed.

I’ve dreamt of this life since I was a young girl but those few months felt like a nightmare. I played football three times a week but had no energy to get out of bed. I celebrated every goal scored but I cried myself to sleep every night. I met the fans after every game but couldn’t truly be thankful for anything anymore.

Looking back I should have spoken to someone about this but I used football as my escape. My head was free. For those 90 minutes I could focus my anger and disappointment on something else.

Football was my rock.

….

Three failed transfers later we were losing hope. The small string of hope we were both clinging to was fraying and wouldn’t hold on for much longer. We’d got used to the faint two pink lines on the test, almost waiting for them to fade slowly over the days.

Then they didn’t. They stuck. For weeks we were almost in denial, always wondering when it would all come crashing down around us.

We kept it a secret as you will have guessed, both of us playing until my partner had to stop.

My wife has well documented her journey into motherhood, challenging the rights of mothers to FIFA and ensuring they are cared for throughout their pregnancy and motherhood.

Just under a year ago we welcomed our daughter into the world. It’s true when they say in that one moment everything changes. Football, has and always will be my biggest passion, but suddenly I had this whole other meaning to life.

But this isn’t so much about my journey through motherhood. I’m not sure if it’s visible but whenever she and my wife are in the crowd I can play with such freedom, knowing my three greatest loves are in one place.

This is a letter to my family.

…..

My wife….

You’re the most loving, caring, fearless, amazing woman I’ve ever met and I’m so lucky to have had the pleasure of being your partner in life.

Most people would describe us as quite cautious, well thought out players. That couldn’t have been more different to the day I made you my wife.

December 31st 2019

You were both so excited at the prospect of starting to try for a baby, spending the Christmas season in your native country and celebrating with both of your families present.

“I love you.” Your girlfriend whispered in your ear as you led in bed on the final morning of the year. “So much.”

“I love you too.”

“Enough to marry me?”

“What?”

“If I find a registrar will you marry me? Tonight?”

“That’s crazy, we can’t do that.”

“Why not? I love you, you love me. Who cares how many people are there? Who cares if we don’t have some fancy reception and a massive cake? All I need is you and I, our family, some friends and a takeaway for tea.”

“What will we wear?”

“We’ll go shopping, we’ve got time. Think about it, tonight we can watch the fireworks go off as wives. So will you do it? Will you marry me?”

“Go on then.”

That night you got married, underneath the stars in your childhood home. Everything absolutely perfect.

I’ve always admired you on the pitch, you exude confidence in everything you do. You’re a heartless defender but I’ve seen the heart of gold you’ve got inside of you.

On the pitch you’re determined in everything you do. There was a point in trying where I wasn’t sure if we could continue trying without breaking our own hearts in the process. But you showed your determination and love for our daughter with every injection, every setback and throughout your pregnancy.

I’ll never be able to thank you enough for everything you sacrificed for us and I hope you know that every time I go onto that pitch I do it for you.

The biggest compliment I can give you is that before I always wondered what I would do when I could no longer play football. How would I fill that void that has been there my whole life? But it couldn’t be easier when I know I’ve got a lifetime with you by my side.

My most precious memory is lifting the Champions League trophy with you and only you know the reason why.

May 2021

The atmosphere in Gothenburg was a strange one. The eerie quietness of the small crowd a stark contrast to the elation among you and your teammates.

The trophy was slowly being passed around, you as always happy to let the other have the limelight before you do.

“Y/N get over here.” Caro shouted. “It’s your turn.”

“Stop hiding at the back.” Mapi added.

“Alright, alright.”

“Let the love birds have a photo.” Alexia chimed in but stopped to pull the both of you in for a hug. “ No-one deserves it more than you two. Now go and do the cringy couples’ photos.”

“Very funny.” They rightfully teased you though, the two of you getting your photos with the trophy.

“I don’t think I’ve seen you smile this wide in months.” She whispered, a reference to your third failed transfer just three months before.

“It’s been hard. Really hard.” You didn’t want to ruin this moment with the tears gathering in your eyes. “But we’re here and I’ve got you. You’ve got me.”

“Maybe we’ve got a good luck charm today.”

“Up there?”

“Down here.” It took you a moment to work out what she was talking about, her hand gently placing your own on her stomach hidden behind the trophy which you fumbled in your hands. “Mapi, take the trophy.”

The trophy went away and you could finally wrap your arms around her. Slightly picking her up off the ground to move over to the side. “Are you serious?”

“I had it done 4 weeks ago, the lines are still there. 6 weeks gone.”

“I-“ You thought you were ready for this moment, you’d been waiting for it for so long but hearing those words filled you with so many emotions. You never wanted this moment to end though as you both just stayed in each other’s arms, chaos ensuing all around you but it felt like you were the only two people in the world. “Thank you.”

“No thank you.”

But I’ve never been as proud of you these past two years. We can appreciate that though it should be normal, we are lucky that we were supported by Barcelona. That didn’t stop you going further, taking it higher up and making sure players across the world are secure financially, emotionally and physically. You’ve changed the sport forever.

I’ve wrote this for you but I hope I show you every day how much you mean to me. I could fill pages and pages just talking about you.  

I love you always X

….

To my daughter….

I’d use this letter to tell you how much I love you but I hope you know that already.

I have no idea when you’ll read this letter, three years from now, ten years from now or twenty years from now but I’d like to say some things that will never change.

After saying all that I hope you know how much we love you. I hope you know that every day I look up to the stars and think about how lucky I am that I have you.

I hope you know that I’ll support you in whatever you want to do in life, whether that’s being a footballer or being a hairdresser. Though I do hope you won’t get bored of being in a football stadium.

April 2022

This felt like the biggest moment of your life so far. A Champions League semi-final leg in Camp Nou against your old club Wolfsburg but it wasn’t just the 90,000 plus fans that were in attendance. Somewhere in a box in the high heavens was a month-old little girl who just happened to share your name.

You’d debated whether to bring her but you simply couldn’t resist the opportunity. She would probably sleep the whole match but just to know she was here was enough.

The 5-1 win topped it all off, the celebrations jubilant as you all interacted with the fans, this was everything you’d worked for and more.

“Y/N! Y/N!” You could hear the fans chanting your name, merely supposing they wanted you to celebrate with them you carried on jumping but two arms wrapped around your shoulders.

“Someone’s come to see you.” Alexia whispered, your head immediately turning to find your wife and a little bundle in her arms. Ear defenders visible over her fluffy baby suit. “Go and enjoy this moment together.”

You didn’t hesitate, jogging over to your biggest loves, pulling one into your arms to your chest and pressing a kiss to the other’s lips. You couldn’t help but admire the tiny Barcelona shirt with your name on the back as she stayed asleep. “How did she like it?”

“It think she’s a fan already, she woke up for a feed and then stayed awake. I think it was the lights but we’ll say it was the football.”

“She’s a culer already.” Irene greeted you both before gently stroking the baby’s head. “Once again, she is gorgeous.”

“Must be the genetics.”

“Go and take her to celebrate.” Your wife insisted.

“You come too.” She haggled and came over but stayed towards the back with some injured players as you took her closer to where the team were. She must have felt the movement as eyes suddenly peered up at you but to your surprise the crying was kept at bay. “Hello, have you come to see mama play?” She simply gurgled back at you before settling against your chest. “You’ve got to get used to this baby.”

“Look who we have here?” Patri came over, carefully kissing the top of her head. “Feel amazing?”

“Feels incredible, the first of many.”

I hope you know that I do everything for you. I do everything so I can come home to your smiley face and watch you grow up.

I hope you know I’m always here for you always. In tough times and good times I’m by your side as your mama and your best friend in one.

I hope you strive for your own happiness and never settle for anything less. I hope you’re as caring and fearless as your mama is. I hope I make you proud.

I hope you know you’re perfect in every way. Never stop being you.

Love mama x

….

To my teammates….

Strangers who became friends who became family.

I’ve been in many teams before, I’ve played with lots of people but they’ve always stayed as friends. You’ve become my family.

We moved to Barcelona not knowing anyone and you took us in, taught us the language and supported us in every way possible.

I know you saw the dark moments. I know I tried to hide away and I’m so thankful you didn’t let me. I wish I could single all of you out and tell you how great you are but I’m sure I’ve told you all how much I appreciate you so I’ll single some of you out.

Jana, my little Jana. This last year has shown me what an absolute talent you are, not because of your talent on the field but for your perseverance off it. Us defenders stick together and it’s fair to say you’re like a little sister to me. I hope you know how much I appreciate every joke you tell, every smile you give because without knowing it you lifted my mood on some very tough days.

Patri. I think it was four months into knowing me that you found me that night. I’ll never be able to put into words how thankful I was for you but I hope you know that I am. You’re a superstar in every way.

December 2020

You’d officially hit rock bottom. It felt like you couldn’t do anything right. You strive for perfection and tonight you were definitely not that.

The sky was pitch black, the flood lights the only light illuminating you. The stands were empty, the only noise coming from your boots hitting the ball. Over and over.

The silly thing was you’d won the match, a last gasp winner sealing the 3 points but the initial equaliser was your fault in your head. You’d let her get the better of you 1v1 and allowed her to put the cross in for a tap in. All you.

So that’s why you were here, repeating that drill over and over again. Punishing yourself with every minute that ticked by.

“Need some company.” You didn’t need to look to know it was Patri, simply ignoring her and carrying on. “You can ignore me all you want, I’m not leaving without you.”

“Go home.”

“You know I can’t do that, but I’ll be over there when you’re ready.”

Twenty minutes had passed and you could see she was still there and even though she was wrapped up in a coat you couldn’t let her freeze any longer. Saying that you still only sat down next to her, neither of you speaking just watching the stars. “We’re trying for a baby.” You whispered, not getting any response from her. “The second one failed this morning.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I know.” There was nothing more to say as you felt her head to come to rest on your shoulder.

“I’m always here you know, morning and night. If you need someone to speak to.”

“Thank you.”

“Are you speaking to anyone about this? You can’t just stay out here all night punishing yourself for a mistake we can all make.”

“I just feel like I keep letting everyone down.”

“You’re not. Look at me.” Gently grabbing your face her eyes met your own. “We all made mistakes out there tonight, I let the ball run through to your player then Mapi didn’t react in the middle. It happens, there’s no use punishing yourself now. Speak to someone, someone who can help. Anyone, a professional, one of us, your family. Someone you can rant and cry to until you can’t anymore.”

“I’ll try.”

I never told you this but I kept that promise that night, all because of you.

Irene, thank you for the late-night phone calls. You understand me like no-one else, Like you have a sixth sense of when I’m stuck in my own mind. You’ve been my biggest teacher on and off the field and you’ve helped me be the person I am today.

Mapi, my best friend. I remember our first meeting, I can now firmly joke that you’d got out of the wrong side of the bed that morning. You barely said hello to me before tackling me to the ground and whipping a free kick over my head in training. But that’s what makes you amazing. It’s hard to look back at that now and not smile knowing how close we are now after you apologised on a night out where we both stayed in the corner. A symbol of our friendship.

The day we came home from the hospital it was you who left meals at our doorstep, with a little care package for the three of us. It was you who fought your way to the front of the crowd to get the first hold. You’re right: looks are deceiving.

Alexia, my captain. You’re the biggest role model for me. I hope my daughter is as smart, courageous, passionate and caring as you are. I hope we put a smile on your face when you needed it just like you did for us.

The birth was coming closer, the both of you completely on edge about when it was going to happen. You were needed for the Champions League games but you also had a pregnant wife at home.

On a random Saturday you got a call from Alexia that the team were having a get together, your regular restaurant had an availability and they made some last-minute plans.

This wasn’t exactly what you needed right now, the stress of preparing the house for the baby was stressful but you were glad to get out of the house.

What you wasn’t expecting though was to open the doors of the restaurant to be met with all your teammates and both your mums and sisters. The room covered in pink and a massive baby sign at the back.

“Oh my…. What are you doing here?” You shouted, pulling your family into her a group hug.

“We’re here to celebrate of course. Your lovely teammates have been planning this for a while”

After you welcomed them you went over to your teammates, individually thanking them all. “Who organised this?”

“We all helped but this was Alexia’s idea, she also wanted to invite your family.” Ana admitted.

When you came to Alexia you gave her the biggest hug of all, tears in both your eyes. “Thank you, you didn’t have to do this.”

“If being captain doesn’t allow you to do this sort of stuff then there’s no point. That baby needs to get used to us anyway so may as well start whilst it’s in the womb.”

I can’t wait for all the seasons to come x

….

And to all of you out there. All of us have times when it can seem like there’s no light at the end of the tunnel, when all hope is lost. Just remember the light never goes away, it’s only hidden from view. It will come back.

Y/N x