#I don't want to decide tomorrow pick for me so i can sleep like 10 more minutes instead of having to get up at 4 exactly

[cowardlycowboys]

ok pick my sweater for tomorrow since it's gonna be like 44 degrees

[patchato]

You should have told me.

(Sanemi x Reader)

TW: Cheating, Angst

I'll be home late.

This was the nth note Sanemi left, just a phrase, nothing else.

As his fiance, it's normal to feel sulky when not told 'I love you' every time he leaves. He always did it back then. Now just feels, different. Somehow.

Hours passed and dinner became cold. I sighed and decided to go to sleep first, he did say he'll be home late. It's been like this for the past 3 months. I ignored it at first since I know he's a hard working man and marriage isn't something to take easy.

We've been engaged for a year. The ring has always brought a smile to my face, especially when I feel down or alone. I sighed and looked at it, I should probably go out tomorrow to have it cleaned. I'll ask for Sanemi's as well.

I looked at the clock while washing the dishes, '10:07' it says.

I pouted, I missed him. Maybe we should go out this saturday. My head thought of the things we can do, I smiled to myself feeling proud. I finished a few more chores and went to bed. The plushie he gave me on our very first date sat on my spot, I held it while slowly drifting to sleep.

My eyes opened and it was still dark. The urge to use the toilet forced me to sit up. I rubbed my eyes and groaned. The time read 5:51 AM, I chuckled. It's like my body knows when to wake up so I can make my future husband his breakfast and lunch.

I turned to look at Sanemi, he was sleeping peacefully. I gave him a light kiss on the cheek, my face scrunched at the smell of alcohol. His colleagues must have dragged him to drink again.

I cooked him eggs, pancakes and made his favourite protein shake. Extra red bean. The shower was already on so I know he's up and getting ready. I sat down waiting for him. His lunch consisted of fresh pickled vegetables, sweet and sour pork along with a pack of chocolates. He may not look like it but he is a big fan of sweets.

Sanemi entered the kitchen and sat down, I perked up watching him eat. He didn't even look at me, it made me feel a little sad. He always compliments my cooking but, he hasn't been doing that these days.

I picked up my fork and started eating myself, I ate slowly as it was still a little early. Going to work earlier and getting home later, it's a little weird if I do think about it. I cleared my head and smiled at him.

"Ah, I have to go." He says looking at his watch. He patted me on the head and proceeded to rush out. I pouted but suddenly remembered I needed his for cleaning.

"Sanemi!" I caught up to him snatching his hand where his ring was. "I'm in a r-", I cut him off by telling him I just needed his ring for cleaning, I looked at his ring finger but it wasn't there. We both stood there, I felt his hand tense and he pulled his hand from mine.

Before I can ask him where it was he pulled the ring out from his bag and handed it to me, "Sorry, I forgot to put it back on last night. I didn't want it to get lost." He smiled and patted my head again. Before I can even say goodbye he was already out.

It feels weird. Why is that?

I shrugged it off and began to get ready to go out after finishing house chores. I texted him that I'll be meeting with some friends for lunch and won't be home for a few hours.

Sure he didn't say he'll be working late but It's better to tell him where I am in case he comes home earlier. I took the rings for cleaning, after that I met my friends and we settled on a cafe near the sea.

We talked about my engagement and what has already been planned. I already picked the bridesmaids and the maid of honor. Everyone was excited until we talked about how I've been lately.

They gave me weird looks and they looked worried. "We don't want you to over think darling but, maybe you should ask his colleagues how he's been at the office." Kanae suggests, the other girls agreed sighing. "Why? I'm sure he's working hard for the wedding." I giggled, "Oh sweet (Y/N)." Shinobu brushes my hair, "You're, too kind for this." She adds. 'Are they saying that he might be out with some other woman?' I thought.

I understood what they're worried about but, I trust Sanemi and I know he loves me. "Thank you for your concern, maybe I'll talk to him soon about it." I answer, I have been thinking about it too but I didn't want to think that way about him. I love him, and with love comes patience and trust.

The meeting ended once their husbands contacted them that they were home. I admit I'm a little jealous, I don't exactly get what they do from their relationship but again, Sanemi is working hard for our future. We all bid our goodbyes and went home.

To my surprise, Sanemi's car is already parked outside the house. I felt excited as it will give me time to tell him that I want to go out this weekend. I unlocked the front house. His shoes were placed messily on the floor. It was weird as he is normally a well organized person. I didn't think any of it and just placed his shoes where it belongs.

I took off mine and began walking upstairs, I felt happy. I can spend time with him. These thoughts instantly vanished when I saw maroon, stiletto shoes which were peeking from inside our bedroom. I don't wear stilettos. 'Maybe it's a gift from him' I thought to myself. I walked closer to the door and that's when it was clear. He brought another woman into our bedroom.

I didn't want to look inside but I stood there looking down while listening to the moans that came from inside our room. I can hear them, making love on the bed we shared. My head was starting to hurt. A tear fell from my eye, then one after the other. I stopped myself from sobbing by covering my mouth. It hurts. It really hurts.

Is this what my mother felt back then? I tried my best not to end up like that. But here I am. I feel stupid, I shouldn't have turned a blind eye to the late nights. Him not wearing his ring. The strong smell of floral perfume on his clothes. He hates floral perfume, he said he loved that I wore vanilla perfume rather than floral. Was he lying? He probably did.

I stepped out and walked to the nearest park and sat down on the bench. I just sat there, thinking of what'll happen now. My face was dry with tears and the headache was still there. The sky began to turn dark but I didn't want to go back to that house. I sent Mitsuri a text that I wanted to talk to her. She responded immediately.

I began my journey to her house, my heart heavy. I don't know what else to think. I played with the ring on my finger, It's slowly starting to look ugly on me. I, don't want it. I took it off and shoved it inside my bag and sighed. The cab arrived at Mitsuri's house. I knocked and Iguro (my brother) greeted me with their daughter, Hana. I greeted them back and kissed the child on her forehead.

'I could've had a family with him', my head was starting to fill up with thoughts again. He invited me in and to my surprise, Giyuu, Genya, Shinobu, Kanae and Kyojuro was also there. I sat down in between Shinobu and Kanae. They stared at me, as if waiting for me to say something. I tried to talk but my tears talked for me. Kanae hugged me and I cried on her shoulder. Small sobs turned to big ones, it felt like I was fighting to breath properly. Shinobu was running my back and the others just watched.

"What's wrong (Y/N)?" Shinobu asks taking my face in her hands, It was hard to talk I stumbled with my words but she knew exactly what I was crying about when she heard 'another woman' from my mouth. They let me cry it out, they comforted me. I can hear my brother cursing in the background.

An hour went by and I began to calm down Mitsuri began to prepare their dinner and it felt like it was best for me to go back home - to that house. "Hey, you can rest here." Mitsuri says, Iguro agreed. "Rest here for the night." He urges me, I smiled and nodded. Grateful that I have such good friends. It made me feel better.

I stared at the sky, thinking of how I'll confront Sanemi tomorrow. I spent another hour crying inside the bedroom once they left me to rest. I'm not sure how to rest with such a stressful thing to think about. Should I think about it? I don't even know anymore.

Before they left, Genya went up to talk to me. His words comforted me, he has always been softer than his older brother.

What's going to happen now? I haven't been working for 1 year due to Sanemi insisting that he work for the both of us, I'm unsure when to live after breaking up with him. I'll make it work. I'm, tired. I fell asleep on the warm bed, this time my body didn't wake up to make breakfast for someone. I slept throughout the night until noon.

I ate breakfast with Iguro and his family, we talked about what to do next after my talk with Sanemi. They offered to live in one of their condominiums that they rent out from up town. I accepted the offer, I'm thankful.

I felt nervous, I feel like throwing up. Iguro dropped me off in front of the house. Sanemi's car was nowhere to be found, God knows where he is. I signed as the anxiety left my body. Iguro said he'll pick me up before sunset so I have enough time to pack my things.

I took out my bags and stuffed them all with my clothes, I didn't touch the dresses Sanemi bought me back then from our anniversary. The jewelry he said looked beautiful on my skin. The plushies, the music box that had the tune of our prom dance. The very night he promised to marry me. It was such a beautiful night, all the memories. The kisses, the night we spent together. All thrown away. I felt like crying again, but I stopped myself. I didn't want to get sick, I need to find a job after this is over.

I heard the front door open, his footsteps echoed through the house. His presence that once brought warmth and comfort now made me feel uncomfortable, it made me want to get away from him.

The bedroom door opened, I turned to him. Our eyes met, he looked tired from who knows what. "You're back." I say, he smelled of that strong perfume again. "Yeah." He replied not looking at me. My chest started to feel tight again and I can feel the tears build up. Did he even wonder where I was last night? Did he try to look for me? Probably not, he didn't even send me a text nor ask my friends if they knew where I was.

"I stayed at Mitsuri's last night." I told him with a sigh, I began to play with my ring once again. I really want to take it off now. "Why?" He asks while he takes off his necktie. The very tie that I used to always do for him. Sadly, I won't be doing anything for him anymore. My eyes wandered to his finger, no ring again. I chuckled to myself which Sanemi seemed to notice. "What's wrong with you?" He asks in an annoyed tone, how dare he? I didn't answer and just stared outside. "You've been real weird lately." He adds, "Am I?" I asked him before looking back down.

I heard him sigh and groan, "Not right now (Y/N). I'm tired." He ruffled his hair and went into the bathroom. The sound of the open shower filled my ear. How should I go about this? Do I just tell him right away? Maybe that would be better. He stayed in the shower for some time, probably clearing his head. What does he have to think of anyway? He's got two women swooning over him. One slaving away and the other squeezed herself in the relationship. I didn't see the woman he was with but I bet she was beautiful. The bathroom door opened revealing a fully clothed Sanemi.

"Sanemi." I called him before he left the bedroom. I can tell he didn't want to be in the room by the way he turned around to face me. It hurt me. He used to look at me in such a loving way, now it's just this. Whatever this is. "Your ring, it's missing again.", that one sentence made his eyes widen and he immediately started to look for it. He grabbed his bag and went through all the pockets. He forgot. He forgot I took it out for cleaning yesterday. I left it on the kitchen counter before I left for Mitsuri's. So he really didn't look for me. How funny. The face he made, the panic in his eyes. It made me laugh a little bit. "What are you laughing about?" He yells. I stopped and stared at him, "It's on the kitchen counter." I answered sighing, I should probably send Iguro a text now. "Why is it there?" He asks confused, "I had it cleaned yesterday. I left it on the kitchen counter when I dropped by yesterday." I answered, "Dropped by?" He looked even more confused. We stared at each other, he really is clueless.

"Shinazugawa, I don't want to be with you anymore."

Sanemi's face softened, he still looks confused. He looked stupid. "Wha-," I cut him off before he can ask, "I know." That one phrase sent him stumbling over the bags on the floor over to me. Seems like he didn't notice it. "(Y/N), please, I'm not..." He tried to form his excuses. "Please don't stop me, I don't have any intentions on hearing your excuses." I sighed. I wanted to cry, but that'll only make me stay with him longer. God knows I'll give in to his pleas if I stay longer.

"No please. I'm sorry. (Y/N)." He pulled me in a hug. I didn't say anything, I let him scramble with his words. His touch made my skin crawl. I began to struggle out of his grasp. It took me a minute to push him away, he's as strong as always. "You already chose your other woman." I say, "You brought her to our bed." I shifted my attention to the bed. Shinazugawa began to caress my face, spouting things that I'm not paying attention to.

"You did such a disgusting thing, Shinazugawa." More pleas and apologies fell from his lying lips. I laughed a little, suddenly remembering the first time I've seen him cry. It was over their family dog. The one their mother left him to take care of. "Why are you laughing..." It was more of him asking himself than me. "I, no longer feel anything towards you." His tears fell faster as he began apologizing again.

"Makes me wonder if I really did love you."

The tears flowing from his eyes didn't stop, he was at the floor now. On his knees, begging me to stay. "Did you even think about me when you brought someone else over." I mumbled, of course he didn't. The image of the man I once loved made my eyes sore. I took off the engagement ring, took his hand stopping him from crying and began to walk out the room. Shinazugawa began to run after me but I didn't give him a chance to pull me back as I opened the door of Iguro's car and locked it. I was finally able to breathe, then the tears came in. My heart hurt seeing him cry. Of course I loved him, I still do even if he did such a horrible thing. I wanted to hurt him too in a way.

He should have told me. We could have talked about it, whether he still felt something for me or if he fell out of love. We could have saved us.

Shinaguzawa was starting to make a scene outside, banging on the car crying all while trying to stop Iguro from taking my things from the house. All my bags we're finally in the car and it was time to leave. Leave everything behind. "Hey.", Iguro calls. He gave me a smile, "You'll be alright."

Yeah, I'll be okay. I smiled back and we drove off. I saw Shinazugawa run after the car. I couldn't help but cry. I wanted to get out of the car and hug him. I don't want him hurting too. But this is for the best. I sent him a text, one last time. Then I blocked him on everything. I wiped my tears and steadied my breathing.

'You should have told me.' Shinazugawa read the text. He couldn't call her anymore. He cried all the way back to his now empty house. He stared at the ring on his hand while cursing at himself. He knew this will be the last time he'll see her.

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Hey everyone! I missed tumblr so I'm back haha! Sorry I've been gone for some time. What do you think of this? Send your votes! I also take requests now so please don't be shy to send me a message! lotsoflove♡

[arsenal-womens-1]

Secrets of the pitch part 2

1 minute left, there was no possible way to win; we had lost the World Cup.

 

I sit on the bench, knowing that it was all over everything I had worked for since I was 3. I would never get the only trophy I really ever wanted. I watch the ref as she brings the whistle up to her lips. The girls drop, and the Spanish players run to each other. 

 

I just sit there and watch everything. All I have ever wanted was that dam trophy. We were so close, and now I'm retiring without it. Nobody knows about that yet. I want to try and play this next season with Barcelona, but I honestly don't know if I can. I've not talked to Lucy about it yet. I probably should, but that's for a later date. 

 

I walk on to the pitch, and Alexia comes over and hugs me. I hug her back and let a few of my tears fall. She goes to say something, but she's called over by 🤮 i don’t like him

 

Time skip 

 

We walk to get our medal. As we walk past the trophy, it reminds us of what we lost. Why couldn't we just win? next the Spanish players get them. I sit on the floor because my knee hurts badly. We all watch the Spanish team lift the trophy. 

 

We get our stuff, and don't change, going on the bus back to the hotel was quiet. Me and Lucy are sharing a room. I go into the bath room and start the shower. I let the tears fall. How was I going to tell Lucy? I can't yet. 

 

Time skip to getting back to Barcelona 

 

Me Lucy and Kira just got off the plane. Mapi and Ingrid are picking us up. We go to baggage claim and pick up our bags. Going out to the exit we see them standing there. We hug and don't say anything. The car ride back to our apartment was quite. Nobody knows what to say. 

 

It's been about an hour since me and Lucy got back to the apartment. We have just been cuddling on the couch, not saying anything. "Lucy, we need to talk." She sits up and has mixed emotions on her face. "Yeah, what's up? What's wrong?" I just look at her "Lucy, I'm going back home." 

 

She has a confused look on her face."When will you be back?" looking away, knowing what I'm about to say is going to start a fight."I'm not coming back." She gets up."What are you talking about? You can't just go back there. You have a contract here. We have a house here." I try to get her hand."Lucy, listen to me." She doesn't, and just goes to the bed room. We had both said we were never going back to Manchester because of what happened there. She didn't let me finish".

 

about 10 minutes later I walk up to the door "Lucy we need to talk ". getting no response. I decided to open the door and see her asleep. It's 9:30 pm. We have a meeting in Barcelona tomorrow, so I just get in bed and go to sleep. Hopefully I can talk to her about it tomorrow

————————————————————————————

Ok so I've decided to make this more then 2 parts but what do you all think happened at Man City that would make Lucy have that kind of reaction

Stay safe eat drink water have a good day/night

[oliveisme533]

My dad’s neighbor is a dilf

Chapter 4

Joel Miller x You

Summery: You had decided to spend your summer in Austin with your dad. You used to spend almost every summer there, but hadn't spent a summer there since you were a teenager. Which means you hadn't seen a certain Joel Miller in years..

Warnings: abusive ex is back. Verbal abuse and physical violence (not against reader)

You roll over in your bed with a groan and stretch your arms. Grabbing your phone you check the time 10:03. Early for you. You decide to hop in the shower before your dad can ask you to help pick up fallen branches in the yard from last nights storm. You let the scolding water hit your body and you draw in a deep breath. Tomorrow was Monday which meant your dad would be back to work and you wouldn't have anyone to talk to or hang out with until 5 o'clock. Rinsing the soap from your face you contemplated just what to do with tomorrow, in fact you were beginning to wonder how to make use of your summer in general. The last couple weeks of doing nothing had been a much needed reprieve from your busy life, but you were starting to get a little stir crazy. You turned off the water, still deep in thought when you heard your phone buzzing. You tiptoed over to your bedside table and saw Joel's name lighting up the screen. "Why is he calling me?" You pick up the phone ...

Hello Hey sweetheart didn't wake ya did I? No no I've been up...for a few minutes (Joel chuckled) Well hey listen, one of my coworkers was looking for a sitter for tonight. He and the Misses are going out and their regular girl can't make it. Any interest in an easy job for the night? Oh yeah I can definitely do that. God know I've got nothing else going on. Okay I'll send you the info! Thanks darlin'

Obviously he wasn't calling just because he wanted to chat with you. It was a stupid thing to even hope for. The rest of the day went by relatively slowly, but when 6 o'clock rolled around you put some snacks in your back pack, a phone charger, and a book you had been trying to finish for several weeks now. The babysitting was easy. It was one kid, she was four years old and for the most part did whatever you asked. The parents told you they would be out late so when 11:45 rolled around you weren't surprised they hadn't come home yet. The house was quiet...too quiet. You never much liked this part of being a baby sitter. It was different when you did it for Sarah. The millers house was always warm and full of life. Those nights when Joel did get home a little later you felt safe curling up in on his couch with the TV on. Most of the times you would fall asleep like that and Joel would drive you home the next day after making you and Sarah breakfast. You smile at the memory. The sounds of the house settling are enough to snap you from this daydream down memory lane. "Fuck I really don't like this huge, quiet house. What if I call someone to keep me company. Dad will be asleep, so would mom and my sister. I bet Joel Miller is awake..." you stare at your phone and contemplate this next move. "Fuck it" you mutter and tape his name. The phone only rings a couple of times before you hear Joel's husky voice. A twinge of guilt shoots through you as you fear you've woken him up.

Hello? Everything okay? Hey, yeah I'm so sorry did I wake you? I was just restin' my eyes that's all. I ain't in bed yet. Well I just- I really don't like being in these houses all by myself. It sounds stupid but it's kinda scary I guess. 'S not stupid. You want someone to talk to-keep ya company? Yeah... and I figured you'd be awake still, but I guess I figured wrong You're all right honey, I really don't mind. I needed to get off this couch and sleep in my bed any how. But how 'bout you tell me about your day? My day was pretty boring honestly. I played with the cat, ate some ice cream and watched TV Wat'd ya watch? Love island What in the hell is that?

You laughed and proceeded to tell him all about the show. A little while passed and then you heard the lock click and knew the parents were home. You told Joel you had to go to which he responded "alright let me know when you get home safe. Can call me if you want." Back home you pondered whether or not you should call Joel. It was late and you were feeling tired, but you wanted to talk to him. After slipping into your pajamas you felt like you could hardly stay awake much longer, but you were determined to take advantage of this invitation from Joel to call him. So you tapped his name and watched the phone ring. You put it to your ear and your heart sank with each unanswered ring. When it went to voicemail you resolved that he had likely fallen asleep and you decided to do the same.

The next day you woke up early (ish) at 9:00. Your dad had already left for work. You roll over in your bed to check your phone and your heart pounds.

Missed call from Joel Miller 36m ago

You're hoping he's not at work yet and call him back quickly. "Hey sweetheart" he picks up within a few rings. "Sorry I missed your call last night. I ended up falling asleep and didn't hear the phone." It was so nice to hear his voice first thing in the morning. "Oh you don't need to apologize. I didn't really need anything, I just like talking to you" you could almost hear Joel grin as he said "well I like talkin' to you too sugar" you had walked down to your kitchen to put on a pot of coffee at this point when you say "hey why aren't you at work?" "Waitin for some parts to come in for this current job. Until they do there's nothin else I can really do. But the parts are supposed to be here by noon... so I'll get my ass to work in a couple hours" you notice a note taped to the fridge as Joel finishes saying all this. "I completely forget" you mutter to yourself, but apparently Joel hears. "What'd you forget?" "My dad left me a note reminding me that he's gone on a business trip and won't be back until Thursday." "Oh that's right. Your dad did mention that. Told me to keep an eye out for ya." "Did he really? "Yeah I mean you're going to be by yourself in that big house for almost 3 days" "I'm a grown ass woman though!" Joel chuckled. "No ones sayin you ain't, darlin. Dads worry and that don't change from when you're 5 or when you're 25" "I guess that's fair enough" you shrug. "I should get my day started here... might go on a run and catch up on laundry" "Well if you need anything the next couple of days just hollar" You hang up the phone with brief goodbyes and run your fingers through your tangled bed head. You groan as you massage your temple. "What the fuck am I doing?? I'm catching feelings for Joel fucking Miller. What's worse is that I'm flirting with him too"

Against your better judgement you decide to text Joel later in the day Hey what time you get off tonight? I should be wrapping up by 7...Why? You want to swing by for dinner? Nothing fancy. I'm just bored and I don't love being here alone in the evenings for long periods of time lol. Well I ain't gonna turn you down for some dinner. I'll see you at 7:30. Can I pick anything up at the store for ya on my way there? Well if you're offering... maybe some ice cream? And a bottle of rosè You got it

The rest of the day went by slowly. 7:30 couldn't get here fast enough. You were hoping for something to happen tonight with Joel, but you weren't sure what that would be. You hadn't decided if the lingering glances from him were just something you were imagining or actually happening. Around 6:30 you decide to hope in the shower and of course shave...because you never know right? After your shower you settle on wearing a simple, linen dress that's super comfortable and not all that fancy.  At exactly 7:30 you hear the doorbell ring. You jump off the sofa to answer it, your heart in your throat. But when you open the door, you're afraid you might be sick. It's not Joel Miller who stands there, but your toxic ex boyfriend ...Ben.

"What the fuck are you doing? You need to leave" Ben smirks. "Aren't you a delight. I just wanted to talk to you, and since you've block my number I had to take matters into my hands." Your heart was racing. Ben had never shown any physical violence against you, but you didn't know what he was capable and you didn't want to find out. "I thought I made myself really fucking clear that we are over" you said with a shaky voice. "Baby I just don't think you get to make that call. I mean I've done so much to make this relationship work. You can't just throw all that away. You know you're never going to find another guy who puts up with your shit." That was it. Something in you snapped. Something that had been brewing for literally years was about to come out. "No fuck you!" You shoved him in the chest with both palms and he stumbled back just a step, caught off guard by your motion. "Screw you! I don't need a guy to put up with anything about me, you asshole. You act like you're some fucking hero for tolerating the fact that I struggle with my mental health and stuff!" Ben was fuming now. You had never laid hands on him and you could tell the shove had lit something inside him too. "You have issues you know that?! You have fucking issues in your head!" He screamed at you getting up in your face and grabbing your arms tightly, pinning them to your sides. Out of the corner of your eye you saw Joel's truck coming down the street and pulling into your drive way. Ben was now shaking you and yelling "YOU'RE SUCH A BITCH.." he didn't get to finish his sentence because a firm hand grabbed him by the shoulder and yanked him backwards.

If looks could kill...you had never seen such an expression on Joel. He looked like he could tear Ben to pieces right then and there, yet he maintained a calm composure. "I suggest you get the fuck off this porch and don't come back, son" Joel said in a low voice. Ben scoffed. "Get out of here, old man. This ain't your business" Ben spat. "Son, we can do this the easy way or the hard way." Ben let his head fall back and let out a chuckle that sent a chill down your spine. "Is that so?" Without warning Ben threw a punch and Joel and narrowly missed "Ben!" You shrieked. Ben straightened up sent another punch. Joel grabbed his wrist, mid punch and yanked him in close. Joel towered over him. "Do not make me repeat myself again. I said get the fuck off this porch, or things will get ugly." At this Joel shoved Ben forcefully away, causing him to stumble backwards. Ben still looked angry, but now there was a hint of fear in his eyes too. He gave you one last glare and then jogged back to his car.

As soon as Ben's car sped off. Joel sun around. "Are you okay??" He asked, grabbing your face in his hands. "Um yeah" you managed to squeak. "I mean that fucking scared me tho." Joel looked like he might be sick. "I am so sorry wasn't here at 7:30. If I got here on time- " "Joel come on you don't need to do that. It's not like either of us had any idea Ben would show up here. I'm glad you came when you did though." Joel massaged the bridge of his nose. He looked stressed and was probably imaging what would have happened if he didn't show up at all. He shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut as if trying to rid himself of the notion. "Joel look at me I'm fine!" You said pulling his hand away from his face. Joel took your hand in his and stroked it with his thumb. "Okay" he said softly. "Did you get my ice cream?" You said trying to change the subject. A smile tugged at his mouth. "Yeah I did, baby"

You had made spaghetti for dinner, about one of the only dishes you were confident in preparing. You and Joel sat at the table in silence and you watched as he pushed his food around. "I'm sorry I'm not a chef...if you want we could just order a pizza?" You suggested. Joel looked up at you seemingly caught off guard. "No no no it's not that! The meal is delicious. I guess I just don't have an appetite. That's all." You pushed back from the table and the chair scraping against the hardwood made Joel jump slightly. "Baby I didn't mean to offend you it's just" you laughed as you reached for the shelf above the stove "Joel I'm not mad I'm just looking for something." Joel slowly walked towards where you were balancing on a stool trying to get the top door of the cabinet open. "Um...what's that?" You grunted as you finally got hold of what it was you were looking for. "My dad's red wine. It's gross too me, but he always says red wine gives you an appetite." You hopped off the stool and thrust the bottle into his chest. "Where's the wine you got me? I would like to get into that like asap." Before waiting for a response you went into the other room where the grocery bag still sat with the ice cream and wine and dug out the bottle. You hastily removed the top and began drinking. "Y/n...slow down what are you doing?" You removed the bottle from your lips and wiped your mouth. "What does it look like I'm doing?" Joel's face was laced with concern. "Okay that's enough. I'm calling your dad, you can stay at mine until he gets home. I'm sure he'll book the first flight back when he hears.." you didn't let Joel finish. He had tried to grab the bottle from your hands "no, fuck off I'm a grown woman. I don't need you calling me dad to tell on me or whatever." Joel placed both hands in his hair and squeezed his head "sweetheart you're clearly not okay! And for good reason... will you just let me help you? I'm worried about you. This shit wasn't in any of the parenting books I read before Sarah.." "you're not my dad!" "No no I'm not saying that I just" ... "is that all this is? You want to fill the void of not having your daughter at home this summer. So you come over here to parent me because my dad's not here? I don't fucking need that Joel I don't want you to see me that way."

...to be continued

[sara78]

Family Don't End In Blood - Part 10

Summary: Following the events of the previous nights, everyone is keeping themselves on their toes. The Ackles family, plus Y/N and Jared, discuss their further moves. Disagreements arise, but a kind soul breaks out the fight easily and allows things to settle down before talking real game.

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x foster!daughter reader

Word count:3,299 (wow, really?)

Transcription - Y/M/N: Your mother's name ; Y/H/C: Your home country

Warnings: Mentions of abuse (nothing graphic but SKIP IF THIS TRIGGERS YOU), kids are the kindest souls in the universe and you can't prove me otherwise, angst

A/N: Here's a little reward for powering through the week :D

Your nights have been pretty restless through the last few years of your life. The way you would flinch from the slightest sound your ears picked up, the way you curled underneath the blanket and squeezed a pillow to your chest, often burying your face in it as well, trying to quiet down the cries and allow the soft fabric to pick up all of your tears without any judgment, the way you would jump awake from a nightmare, just to get hit and yelled at for waking up others and the way you overall didn't feel safe, did a thing or two to you through the course of years.

Something happened with all of that when you started working on Supernatural. Something changed in the way your body worked. You slept pretty well. Yes, nightmares were still there, but there was no yelling and punching after you woke up from one. Your body felt safe, surrounded by kind people and kids. You slowly but surely started to feel like the old self - able to asleep in any spot at any time. You're pretty sure Jensen, Jared and Misha have a whole album on their phones just with your weird sleeping spots just to tease you, which you didn't mind, as you had just as much material to tease them back.

But this night was restless. For both you and Jensen. Maybe it was the fear of what tomorrow would bring. Maybe it was fear of how are things going to go down. Or it was fear of losing people close to you. No matter the reason, fear was evidently present. You could feel it in the air.

You just laid down next to Jensen and stared at the ceiling with him after you finished getting ready for bed.

He'd strike up a question. You'd do the same. But all the conversations died rather quickly and you'd both return to silence, staring at the ceiling and trying to calm down your racing minds.

Soon enough the night turned into early morning, and everything that was going through your head was pushed aside as you heard a knock on the door,

"Hey," Jared's raspy morning voice spoke up, "Danneel and the kids should be here soon. Wanna come with us to pick 'em up?" you nod, sitting up and yawning, Jensen still laying down, "Did you two sleep any?"

"No," Jensen said as he sat up while you stood up, rubbing sleep out of your eyes, "I'll be ready in a few."

"No hurries," Jared said, "Y/N, wanna come with me to grab breakfast after we pick everyone up from the airport? We're not on set today."

"What?" you asked, visibly confused, "It was supposed to be Mish, you and me on set today. What happened to that?"

"Rich sent me a text and told me we're off the schedule for today and tomorrow. We had the weekend off anyways, so it's just extended now," Misha spoke up from behind, making you sigh,

"I don't want others working overtime because of me. I can work."

"Rich is behind the steering wheel and that's what he decided. Making this show isn't just acting as well," Jared pointed out,

"Besides, you can go ahead and call him, wake him up and make him all grumpy. I'd enjoy that, he loves his beauty sleep," Misha added, making everyone smile.

Crowded places weren't your jam. Maybe because you always had a feeling you weren't safe. You didn't know how many different personalities walked past you and that scared you a bit. Especially because coming from a third-world country, you'd never seen so many people packed somewhere and it was a weird experience, but you'd learned fast enough.

But this time, as you walked through the airport, you kept scanning every single face that had even the slightest of resemblance to her.

You were afraid she was following you. You weren't sure how much does she know and what weapons is she willing to use to get to you and people you love. She's got her way around here and it scares you to hell and back.

And to think that she could pop out from anywhere and hurt anyone who's walking with you and hurt the four people who are about to land sent chills down your spine and kept you on edge with every step you took.

You were at the gate just in time, as Danneel walked up with the kids. While the girls ran to Jensen, Zeppelin had no problem running to you, even though he was on a long flight and you could see how tired he was just by the way he looked at you. But the way he lit up and smiled when his eyes caught glimpse of you made you smile just as wide, seeing how much joy and love can a child's heart hold. He was in your arms within seconds and you felt so relieved to be able to hug him tightly and protect him from whatever might happen.

He's just a little kid.

How can she threaten a child?

You kissed his temple as he curled into your hold and clung to you, not letting go,

"I missed ya, Y/N," he murmured, making you smile and rock him gently,

"I missed you too, big guy," you responded, allowing Jensen to give his buddy a kiss as you waved at the girls. Arrow came up and gave your leg a small hug, while JJ walked past you and went straight to Jared. You sighed, Danneel showing up and giving you a big hug,

"I'm sorry," you whispered and she shook her head, still hugging you,

"There's nothing to be sorry for. We're safe and that's all that matters."

"Let's get going," Misha said, "You must be tired and hungry."

"Y/N and I will go order and bring breakfast home," Jared said, letting JJ down into the backseat and making you sigh as you put Zeppelin in his car seat to which he protested,

"Hey, what's my little guy want for breakfast?" you tried and he pouted, "Buddy, I know you wanna stay with me, but uncle Jared has no kid seats in his car because he's a dummy," Zeppelin giggled, making you smile too, "How about I get y'all a shake?" Arrow squealed in joy in response, Zeppelin nod and JJ kept quiet,

"Birdie, say thank you to Y/N," Jensen said, looking at her as he sat in the drivers seat. She pouted and looked away in the other direction, "Come on birdie."

"Thanks," she murmured, not looking at you. You sighed, looking down for a second and catching a deep breath to stop the tears from spilling.

JJ didn't like you. At all. And that was okay. You didn't expect her to like you. Especially because she's way older than the twins and understands more than they can right now. But you were trying to do as much as you could without overstepping her boundaries and now, when you are this vulnerable, the slightest thing that usually doesn't bother you now seems like the end of the world. And it hurt, plain and simple.

"What's the plan?" you asked, working on strapping the twins safely into their seats as you sniffled,

"We're gonna discuss that on our way back," Jensen sighed, sipping on his coffee, "You don't separate from Jared."

"I won't," you sighed, kissing Zeppelin and Arrow's foreheads before closing the door to the backseat, "Please, talk about every possible option. Even the ones that have me going away," you said and Danneel shook her head as you looked at her,

"You going away is never going to be an option," she said with a smile and you sighed, walking away to Jared's car.

Three hours later

"You guys good?" Jensen asked as you and Jared walked into the apartment an hour and a half later,

"Yeah," you smiled, "Kids asleep?"

"Out like a light," Danneel smiled, "Zeppelin was the last one to fall asleep. He was waiting for you."

"That kid will be the death of me," you smiled, "Breakfast good?"

"Yeah. Yours got cold though," Jensen pointed out, "Everything okay for sure?"

"Yeah," you smiled, "We just needed to clear our heads and get some fresh air."

"I had a moment and she made me stop and do as she said," Jared popped in, "Sorry for not checking in."

"She sent me a text. Knows us all too well," Jensen smiled, ruffling your hair, "Now you two get your asses at the table and eat."

Heavy silence filled the room while you and Jared ate. Jensen was sipping on his fourth coffee of the day and Danneel was sitting right next to him, cuddled up to his side and playing with the fingers of his hand.

Jared was obviously the first one to finish the meal, as he was the human food vacuum. You took a few more minutes before placing your plate and utensils into the dishwasher and turning it on. You returned to the living room, where Jensen and Danneel were on the couch and Jared was on the other couch, facing the two. You took a seat next to Jared and sighed,

"This can't go on anymore," you said, bringing Jensen back from his over thinking and Danneel from her half-asleep daze, "We can't make this work out. We tried, and I love you all for trying, but it's not working. We gotta do something because I don't want either of you being in danger anymore."

"We don't want you being in danger too," Jensen added, making you sigh, "We're gonna make it work."

"How?" you asked, "By keeping Dee and the kids here, imprisoned?"

"No," Jensen shook his head, "It was a bone-headed move to make them come here. I acted out of fear. They're way safer in Texas."

"What makes you think that?" you asked,

"She's wanted for not showing up for trial with Chaos Machine when she attacked you," Danneel explained, "She can't cross the border nor use any of her documents. Unless she makes a new identity, she can't cross the border. She's also here on a travel visa, which expired long time ago."

"She makes connections so deep in the rotten pores of the law it makes me sick. I wouldn't be surprised if she found someone to work with who could get her over the border," you explained,

"Even if she does, it'll take a long time. Kids and I will be safe in Austin. Now, Jensen, honey, you making us come here wasn't a bone-headed move. We need to be together, at least for a few days. Kids and I will stay for a bit and then go back. They still have around a month of school left and you have a lot of filming to do."

"I mean, it's only five weeks. But that might be extended, given all the circumstances," you pointed out and Jensen shook his head,

"We're skyrocketing on the streaming charts. We're doing another season in the fall and two extra episodes this summer. Meaning we don't get off work till mid June."

"When were you gonna tell us that?" Jared spoke up from where he was leaned against the couch, "We doing that good?"

"We still got it, old man," Jensen teased, making everyone giggle,

"He's not old. He just has gray hair that Sarah has to dye over and over again," you pointed out, Jared sitting up and tickling your sides as Jensen and Danneel giggled, "I'm glad we brought the show back."

"We all are," Danneel smiled,

"Nonetheless, my point stil stands. The filming is going to take a while. She has all the time in the world to figure shit out. She's going to find a way to fuck us over, one way or another. I know you don't like this idea at all, but I think that me moving out is the most rational option at the moment."

"No," Jensen shook his head, eyes staring at some point on the carpet, "Not happening."

"Jense, it's for the best. I'm the target and she's using you to get to me. She knows me all too well. If I remove myself from your place, she won't chase after you anymore. We're gonna see each other on set. We have phones too. We can keep in touch, and of course we will. I don't want to cut any contact off. I just want to remove myself physically from you and your families until it's safe for you."

"It's supposed to be about your safety too, not just ours," Jensen said,

"Well my safety had been compromised for a very long time. I can live a bit longer in the danger zone. You, however, don't deserve to suffer because of what's going on between me and her."

"But kid, there's a plot hole," Jared spoke up, "Say you move out. We stay in contact, all cool. But what if she comes to us and asks for your whereabouts?"

"Simple, I won't give you my address. You won't know."

"And you think that us telling her we don't know will be the answer she wants to hear? You think she'd believe us?"

"I… Fuck," you breathed, running a hand over your face,

"I'd tell her to piss off, whether I knew the address or not," Jensen growled,

"None of us would give it up," Jared added, "I see where you're coming from, munchkin. But unfortunately, plot holes exist and she might want to hurt us even if we're don't know anything about your whereabouts. I'm siding with Jensen on this one. It's better to be around familiar people. It helps with your head, right? That's what you told me like an hour ago. There's no reason to sit and suffer in silence."

"I wish I was normal," you whispered, looking down to the floor, "I wish we weren't having this conversation right now. I wish I wasn't the problem."

"You are normal and you aren't the problem," Danneel said, "Sweetie, you're so far from the problem. We all know who the real problem is and we know that in this moment we can't remove it. But what we can do is stay together and keep fighting."

"What if I just met up with her?" you said, Jensen's eyes widening as he looked you in the eye, "I mean, just end it, once and for all?"

"What makes you think she'll listen?" Jensen said, making you roll your eyes,

"You can't just contradict everything I say, Jensen. Especially not when some of the solutions are actually pretty solid."

"I'm not contradicting you because I like to. I'm doing it because I don't want you to be in her vicinity. Ever again. After everything she's done to you, she doesn't get to keep having her way with you."

"Due all respect, you don't even know half of what happened-"

"And that's what scares me!" Jensen exclaimed, "It scares me to hell and back because I don't want you to live like that anymore. I don't want you to jump at every sound your ears pick up, I don't want you waking up from nightmares, drenched in sweat and crying, I don't want you to be afraid of loving and being loved. I want you to be a kid too! And by putting yourself out there, you're doing her a favor. You can't compromise your safety like that. "

"If you wish for a normal kid, why did you want to adopt me in the first place?" you asked,

"I never said I wanted a normal kid. Just a kid that isn't in fight or flight mode all the fucking time."

"Well that's what you get," you said, "You knew what you got yourself into. I've warned you multiple times that I can't be a regular kid. I'm fucked up, very fucked up on many, many levels and I'm sorry I don't meet your expectations."

Jensen abruptly stood up and walked away into his bedroom, Danneel sighing and going after him, which left you with Jared. You buried your face in your palms, trying so hard not to cry.

You got attached.

And you shouldn't have.

"There's no expectations to meet," Jared's voice spoke up as you felt the couch dip down on your right, "We just want to give you a space where you can feel safe and sound. Where you don't have to be afraid. Where you can relax and be yourself without any hesitation. We love you for who you are. We loved you on day one, when we didn't know nothing about you besides how big your appetite is and how much of a joker you are. And we didn't stop loving you when your background unraveled and came into the picture. And we won't stop loving you, no matter what tomorrow brings. You're our kid and nothing can change that. Fuck me, we all have loads of crap on our shoulders and you love us the same way we love you."

"That's different."

"How can that be different?" Jared asked, "There's no difference. There's no measuring whose pile of crap is heavier. There's none of that. We all have our own struggles and we all have an equal right to feel how we feel about them. There's nothing wrong in being scared and nobody here wants you to be someone you're not. You're scared and you're terrified. You can be scared and terrified. Nobody would point any fingers at you because we know what's the reason for it and whilst maybe we don't know the whole story, we know enough to piece it together and understand."

"You are NOT moving out," Jensen growled as he stormed out of his bedroom, Danneel on his tail. His tone took you by surprise and his stance gave you some not so nice flashbacks, resulting in your body flinching in a try to shy away from him,

"Jensen, relax. Nobody's moving out," Jared said, "Let's all take a deep breath and-"

"You don't get to walk out on your family," Jensen kept talking to you, "Not on us. Not on that little kid who loves you more than anything in this world," he began, pointing to Zeppelin's room, "Not on this woman who took you in like you're her own child. Not on Jared who cares for you so deeply. And not on me. You don't get to walk out on me because I want to protect you and keep you safe."

"I'm not asking for protection," you said, standing up, "And I'm not walking out on anyone. I just want to do this right."

"And you think that handing yourself to her is the way to go?!" Jensen asked, making you gulp,

"I don't know!" you exclaimed, "I don't know what's the right thing to do. I want to do something, anything, just to feel like I at least tried."

"Well, we can do something else. Together. But you're not moving out. You're not leaving your family."

"Jensen-"

"No!" he exclaimed, "You are family. To me, to Danneel, to the kids. To the Padalecki, to Misha. So, I'm sorry, but you're not gonna be by yourself as you wallow in self-hate, painful memories and fear. You've had enough crap for the next 10 lifetimes and it scares the shit out of me that you were on your own all this time and it freaks me out that I don't know half of the stuff she fed you with and I don't know if I can help you, but I'm going to be here and you're going to be here and you're staying. You don't get to say you involved us too much already. Because the moment she step foot onto the set, that's when your problem became our problem. She won't hurt you ever again! I'm not gonna let her hurt you again! And I'm not gonna let you destroy yourself and put yourself in danger because-"

"Daddy, stop yelling at Y/N!" Zeppelin's small voice echoed, making everyone go dead silent as they all looked at him in his dinosaur pajamas, holding his blankie in his tiny hands. He walked up to Jensen who had his eyes glued to him, "You tell us we shouldn't yell. Apologize to Y/N."

Everyone was in awe of Zeppelin's words. Such a young child yet so emotionally mature. He turned around and walked up to you and you smiled as you picked him up and sat him on your hip,

"I'm sorry Y/N," Jensen whispered, sitting down,

"It's okay," you said, "If I recall, you have some dinosaurs to be fed?" Zeppelin nod with a smile, "Then we can't keep them waiting any longer or they'll eat us," you smiled, walking away from the living room.

3rd person POV

"That kid is something else," Jared breathed, Danneel grabbing Jensen's hand and bringing him back to sit down at the couch,

"He's right," Jensen whispered, "We teach them not to do that, yet I did the exact same thing I tell them not to do. I didn't want to yell at her."

"People can push our buttons and she's been pushing yours for a long time," Danneel said, "She knows you didn't mean for it to come out that harsh."

"She probably thinks I hate her," he responded,

"Then you talk to her and make sure she understands that you are allowed to have bad days," Jared joined in, "You're human, brother. You can make mistakes. As long as you owe up to them and try better next time, you'll be forgiven. And Y/N is one of the kindest souls I've ever met. She'll have no problem forgiving you. If someone knows what it's like to keep all those feelings bottled up, it's gonna be her. I bet she ain't even mad."

"Jared's right, honey," Danneel cooed, kissing his temple, "He's very right. Just talk to her about it later. Let some time pass. And everything you said is true and we stand by what your point is. She has a good intention, just bad execution."

"I just want everything to be over so that we can adopt her and be a family and just live life without being in fear all the fucking time," Jensen breathed, running his hands through his hair,

"She's got a long road ahead of her, but we're gonna be there to support her no matter what," Danneel smiled softly, squeezing Jensen to her side, "You're so noble, to love her the way you love all three of the other kids. Your heart is so big and so loving. Don't ever forget that."

"I hope I can do enough to make her stay."

"She's not going to leave us," Jared pointed out, "She just has to learn that sometimes she can't do anything about something. And no matter what happens, she's still gonna be the one getting pranked alongside Misha. She's still gonna be our kid, no matter what. You gotta trust her on that."

"I do trust her, of course I do," Jensen breathed, "I just… I'm just scared of the endless possibilities. What if she kidnaps her and brings her back to Y/H/C? She said it herself, Y/M/N is playing this game very dirty. Who knows what she can do to her."

"Some things can't be stopped," Danneel said, "Of course we want to protect her and keep her safe. But some things can't be stopped and we cannot foresee what's gonna happen. She won't be stopped from doing whatever she wants to do to Y/N. I wish we knew and I wish we could act on it but maybe we won't be able to and that's okay too. She's not gonna blame you or anyone else for what her mother does. And we'll be here for her when it's over, to help her heal and give her a place to call home."

"Yeah," Jensen whispered, wrapping his arms around Danneel and hugging her back, "You should get some sleep, honey."

"You should too," she countered,

"I just downed another coffee. It might take a while before I start getting sleepy again."

"It doesn't matter," Danneel pointed out, "Just come lay with me when you calm down your jitters."

"I'll go out, get some food, make some lunch and dinner. Invite Misha over," Jared said, "When I come back everyone in this house better be sleeping," he said, standing up from his seat, walking over to Zeppelin's room, knocking on it softly before getting in and closing the door behind him,

"Sorry to interrupt," he spoke up with a smile, seeing how happy Zeppelin was as he played with Y/N, "I was wondering if you guys have any ideas for lunch and dinner tonight?"

"I'm fine with whatever," Y/N said, shrugging her shoulders,

"I wants pizza!" Zeppelin exclaimed, Y/N and Jared giggling,

"Yeah? How about everyone makes their own pizza tonight? Everyone gets to choose what to put on 'em?"

"Yeah!" Zeppelin exclaimed happily, "Thanks uncle Jare!"

"You're welcome," he smiled, ruffling his hair, "Are you happy because you get to play with Y/N?"

"Yea!" he said with a wide smile, "I love Y/N!"

"I love you too, big guy," Y/N smiled, Jared smiling as well,

"I'll leave you guys to it. You better get some sleep before lunch too. That's an order."

"That's a boring order," Zeppelin said, making you and Jared giggle,

"What do you say, is uncle Jare scary?" Y/N asked and Zeppelin shook his head,

"No. He funny and clumsy and old."

"Well thank you very much," Jared grumbled, "This old man will be going to the grocery store now and leave y'all to feeding the Jurassic Park over there."

"You okay?" Jared asked as he left Zeppelin's room, leaving the door slightly ajar. Jensen was leaning against one of many windows in his apartment, just looking out to the streets,

"Yeah," Jensen breathed, "Sorry for freaking you out earlier."

"Don't apologize," he shook his head, "I was kinda surprised by your abrupt leave though."

"I just..." Jensen shook his head, "I was so pissed at Y/M/N. Still fucking am. I would love to punch something. Preferably her face."

"We would be taking turns for that," Jared sighed, patting Jensen's back, "It's okay. Y/N is playing with Zeppelin, seems to calm her down a little. Give her a little bit of time."

"Yeah, will do," he whispered, "Thanks for being here man."

"It's what brothers do," he smiled, "I'll be heading out. Pineapple pizza for dinner?"

"You want to get your face punched instead?" Jensen asked, making Jared giggle and jokingly run away, "Shoo, old man."

"Your face is old!" Jared exclaimed from the doorway, closing the door behind him.

Jensen took one final glance from the window, scanning the blurry faces on the street. He sighed, walking away and into the room JJ and Arrow shared. He made sure they were nicely tucked in and leaned to give them both a kiss to their cheek before going to the bathroom.

He walked into the bathroom and washed his face. Seeing himself in the mirror scared him a little. The bags under his eyes definitely have their five minutes of glory. He grabbed his toothbrush and brushed his teeth before changing into a pair of shorts and a shirt and walking up to Zeppelin's room.

The door was slightly open and he saw Y/N and Zeppelin sitting on the floor, both of them playing with dinosaurs toys,

"Y/N," Zeppelin spoke up as he kept playing, "Why's daddy scared?"

"Uh, you remember that monster you dreamt of a while back?" Y/N asked and he nod, "Yeah, remember how I said I have dreams with monsters too?" Zeppelin nod again, "Dad is scared of some monsters of his own."

"He had a bad dream?" Zeppelin asked, looking at Y/N and stopping with playing, "But you told me daddy will protect us."

"He will, of course he will," Y/N smiled, "But daddy can be scared too. And he will still protect us, no matter what."

"He yelled at you," Zeppelin looked down, poking at one of his dinosaurs toys, "Is he mad at you?"

"Probably," Y/N sighed,

"Why?" he asked,

"I make mistakes. I've been making a lot of those recently."

"Like JJ?" he asked and she smiled,

"Sorta."

"But JJ doesn't talk to mommy and daddy when they're mad at her, or when she's mad at 'em. You talk to daddy. Why's he still mad at you then?"

"Just because we talk doesn't mean he's not mad at me. He's scared too. You remember how you reacted when you saw the monster in your dream?" Zeppelin nod, looking down in shame, "Hey, bubba, lookie at me," she tried, crawling over to him and picking him up and sitting him in her lap, "I'm not saying this to tease you. I'm trying to tell you that everyone reacts some way when they're scared."

"So, daddy yelled because he's scared?" Zeppelin asked and Y/N nod,

"Partly, yes. That's right bubba."

"Can we help him not to be scared anymore?" he asked and she smiled,

"I think this is just one of his bad days."

"So what do we do?"

"We remind him of how much we love him and give him an extra tight hug," Y/N said, Zeppelin nodding,

"Okay. Can I do it now?"

"I think dad's asleep. But you can totally do it when he wakes up. Now, I've got a little something for you..." Y/N said, reaching under the bed and grabbing a new Lego set of a monster truck and showing it to Zepp, which resulted in a squirm and a jump right on her,

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" he exclaimed, clinging to her. She smiled, hugging him and kissing his temple,

"You're welcome, you're welcome, you're welcome!" she responded, allowing Zeppelin to settle into her lap with a yawn, "You tired, big guy?" he nod, looking up to her, "I think it's time for a little nap. I'll wake you up for lunch and then we can start building this together. Maybe dad or uncle Jared would join us too."

"But I wanna play with you now," he said with a sad face,

"I know you want to but if we start making this truck now, I'm afraid we might get some sort of an animal instead of a truck since we haven't rested well. And also, mom said you can stay for a few days so we have plenty of time to play. And we don't want to be cranky like old man uncle Jared," she teased, making Zeppelin giggle, "Come on now, you can go ahead and pick a book you want me to read you as a nap-time story."

"I haven't heard of nap-time stories," he said,

"That's probably cuz I just made it up," you giggled, kissing the top of his head, "Go on sweetheart, pick a book. Then we can transfer the Jurassic park over on the shelf and read. Sounds good?"

"Yea!" Zeppelin exclaimed, standing up and going for the book shelf.

As Y/N stood up she saw Jensen on the doorway. He just smiled at her and nod, and she did the same. He leaned against the doorframe and watched as Zeppelin helped her bring the toys on the shelf and then watched him lie down and drift off quickly, as Y/N read him the book he picked.

As she finished, she tucked Zeppelin in and stood up quietly, picking up her bedding and walking up to the doorway where Jensen stood,

"Everything okay?" she asked,

"Yeah," Jensen nod with a smile, "Thanks for taking care of him."

"No problem," she smiled,

"You should sleep some, kiddo," he then said, making her roll her eyes, "Come on. You haven't slept any. You gotta rest some."

"I have to catch up with math that I missed last night. I don't have time for sleep right now."

"Do I need to read you a nap-time story to make you go to bed?" Jensen inclined, making Y/N smile,

"How much did you eavesdrop, old man?" she teased, making Jensen smile

"Enough to know of nap-time stories. And that Jared's the old man and not me," he smirked, "Come on sweetheart. Lunch won't be for another two hours minimum. You have a bunch of time after kids go to sleep to catch up with your math. Please?"

"Are you gonna get some sleep too?" she asked and he sighed, nodding,

"Promised Dee."

"I don't feel tired at all but okay, I'll try to," she sighed, "I'll sleep on the couch. That okay?"

"Yeah," Jensen nod, "One last question," he said as Y/N opened the door to Zeppelin's room, "You okay?" she smiled, nodding,

"Yeah. Go get some rest Jens. You need it," she said, closing the door to Zeppelin's room, going for the couch. Jensen waited for her to get comfy before approaching to tuck her in, making her giggle, "Dude, I'm not five."

"You're my kiddo, whether you're five, seventeen or seventy seven. Sleep tight," he smiled, kissing the top of her head before walking away to his room. He quietly walked over to his bed, laying down and facing Danneel's asleep form,

"Glad you came," she whispered, not opening her eyes but instead opening her arms for him, "Y/N and Zepp asleep?"

"Yup. Figured I'd come nap with my super hot wife," Jensen teased, seeing Danneel's eyes roll under the eyelids,

"You ain't getting anywhere with that. C'mere," she said, opening her arms for him, ". "You are long overdue for a cuddle. I missed you."

"I missed you too," he whispered as he cuddled up to her chest, "I love you."

"Love you too."

Your POV

"That is physics," Jensen spoke up and you giggled, shaking your head,

"Math."

"Whats arrows over letters doing in math?!" he exclaimed,

"Vectors," you smiled, "Everyone asleep?"

"Yep. I'd be surprised if they weren't," Jensen said as he sat down on the bar stool next to you, "Done with school for the day?"

"Yeah. You headed to bed too?"

"I wanted to talk about today with you before I go hear Danneel snoring in my ear."

"You're the one snoring, idiot," Danneel called out as she walked out of the bathroom, "How was school today?" she asked as she came up to you,

"Good. I have a physics test next week."

"Oh, that doesn't sound very pleasing," she said, making everyone giggle, "Okay. Both of you, don't stay up too late. Night Y/N," she smiled as she hugged you softly and you returned it,

"Night mom."

Jensen kept quiet at the way you called Danneel, but you swore something shined in his eyes, but something shattered as well. Maybe you shouldn't have said it.

"So, what did you wanna talk about?"

"I'm sorry for losing my temper earlier today. Zeppelin is right. I teach them not to yell yet I do exactly that."

"Jense, I know you didn't mean for it to come out that loud. I'm not mad at you. I was pissing you off for as long as we know each other. It was bound to happen and I know that."

"But you flinched," he said and you sighed, looking down, "I saw it."

"I just sometimes get scared. That's all."

"I should have watched my tone. I'm sorry."

"And I shouldn't have pushed your buttons. I'm the one who's supposed to apologize. I've been treating you like shit and you don't deserve it at all."

"It's okay. Have you thought a bit into the whole situation? Or do you need some time?" he asked and you sighed, nodding,

Uncle Jared's right. I just… don't know what to do anymore. I'm scared of her, I'm scared for your safety, for everyone's safety, yet I don't want anyone to suffer because of me. It's so complicated."

"Yet very simple," Jensen said, "You stay with us. We finish filming, go to Texas, stay the summer there. I was thinking we could go for a little vacation somewhere. We come back to Vancouver and keep filming in November. You'll be in your third year of high-school and you'll do great."

"And what if something comes up? What if she does something?"

"Then we deal with it when it comes. We can't live in fear, kiddo. We can't live like this, afraid of taking a step. We're gonna be extra cautious, of course, but we can't lock ourselves in and do nothing. We gotta keep living as normal as we can, given the circumstances."

"You think she's not gonna do anything?" you asked, biting on your lip,

"I don't know what she thinks and what she plans to do. What I know is that we're all gonna try to protect each other. And that's all that matters. Besides, she can't keep this up for that long. She's gonna fuck up and set herself to be caught. It's just a matter of time."

"I have such a bad feeling about this all," you said, "I don't want her to be here anymore. How come she isn't arrested?"

"She's definitely hiding well. And with her connections with CPS, she's gotta have some in the federal department too. You said it yourself."

"She's gonna do something big. It's only a matter of time," you said, "She always does something big when shit doesn't go her way. She always makes some big problems."

"And we can't stop her from that. But we can make sure to act properly when it happens and stay close. It's the one thing we gotta do. We gotta stay together. She can't get through any of us when we're together. It's what she doesn't understand and doesn't know. She's powerless when we're together."

"She's never had anyone to have her back," you said, "She thinks her mom has her back but she's just using her. She always told me that I don't need any friends, that I'm better off on my own. That nobody needs friends. She thinks she's doing just fine without any friends and she tried to make me have no friends either."

"I see how well the no friends situation is coming down for her," Jensen sassed, making you giggle, "It doesn't matter. It's her life, she can screw it however she wants to. Only thing we won't let her do is screw you again."

"Yeah. But just because she doesn't understand how strong we are doesn't mean she won't try to do anything and everything to break me apart. And now you too. You understand what you're getting yourself into, right? I don't want you to get hurt, Jensen. Not you, not anyone. This is on me. If something happens to you-"

"What I've gotten myself into is a relationship with this wonderful kiddo who's got heart bigger than the sun. This kiddo who loves without limits, who cares and feels deeply, the kid who can smile, sing and joke around. You're a wonderful person and just because you have shitty baggage doesn't mean you're a bad person. Especially because you can't do anything to ship off the shitty baggage."

"Sorry for all of this," you whispered, looking down, "Sorry for being an ass to you. You didn't deserve any of it."

"It's true. I didn't deserve any of it," Jensen agreed, "But I understand that you're having a hard time with coming to grounds about things such as having a supportive family. You're still in that flight or fight mode you've been in for years and I also know you're stubborn as hell. I'm not mad at you and you're not making any mistakes or doing anything that would make me mad. You're just living the way you lived back in Y/H/C. And yes, you don't have to live like that anymore, but it's gonna take time for you to let go of old habits."

"I... I always got beaten up after an argument," you said with a sad smile as you looked at Jensen, "When something like this today came down, she'd beat me while I was sleeping. Wake me up in the process. Leave me crying quietly, sometimes beat me up again because I was crying, even though I was quiet. That's why I flinched today."

"I might lose my temper and raise my voice but I'm never, ever going to hit you. We're gonna talk it out. Whatever it is, no matter how difficult it is or how stressful it is, we're gonna talk it out. Just like we're doing now."

"Thanks for treating me like a human," you then said, smiling, "Even though you don't agree with my opinions, you still listened."

"You're always gonna be my kiddo but that doesn't mean that you're gonna be treated as a five year old when something important is being discussed. You are entitled to your own opinion and that's completely normal."

"Thanks. And sorry for being an ass. I'll try to do better in the future."

"And that's all I'm asking," he smiled at you, standing up from his stool and walking up to you to hug you, "To try."

"You're a sap," you teased, hugging him back,

"I know, Dean doesn't approve. Now, where are you sleeping?"

"I thought to sleep here, on the couch. I've stayed up for my classes anyway so-"

"Daddy," a small voice called, making Jensen turn around as you both looked in the direction where the sound came from, "I-I had a nightmare," Arrow hiccuped, approaching you two. Jensen frowned, meeting her halfway and picking her up,

"Yeah baby girl? You wanna stay with me and Y/N for a while?" she nod, leaning her head against Jensen's shoulder as he began swaying her,

"What was it about Ro?" you asked, "If you're comfortable with talking about it," she shook her head and you frowned, "That's okay. What can we do to help you feel better?"

"Sing," she whispered, ever so gently, "Y/N, sing."

"Me?" you said, surprised at the request. She just nod, Jensen nodding you to sit on the sofa with them. You followed his cue, sitting on the sofa with Jensen, Arrow still in his arms.

You began softly singing, getting Arrows full attention as she looked at you, her head leaned against Jensen's shoulder. You kept singing songs that came to your mind, basically anything on your first language that had a soft tune to it.

It didn't take her long to fall asleep, soundly held in her dad's embrace. You smiled, leaning to kiss the top of her head, Jensen' halfway asleep as well,

"I would never figure out why you hid that angelic voice from us," he said, ruffling your hair. You rolled your eyes, grabbing the blanket and throwing it over him and Arrow,

"Sleep here with her," you said, "I'll go finish something for school and then-"

"No," Jensen shook his head, grabbing your hand gently, "You lay down with us too. Cuddle puddle."

"Jense-"

"No arguments," he breathed, "We're too tired. Let's just sleep. Come on," you sighed, knowing you're not gonna win this argument. You laid down, Jensen throwing another blanket over you and giving you your pillows, "Expect the other two to be all over us in the morning. I am not responsible if any of your kidneys decide to go on a walk when they jump on us," he said, making you giggle,

"Don't worry. My little cousin back in Y/H/C did that all the time to me. I'm trained well."

"Yeah, I can tell," he smiled, "Night, Y/N."

"Night Jens."

A/N 2: Thanks for reading! And, @crasmuna, you are so fucking far away so I can't hug you, so this will have to do <3

[kpop-yes]

Yujin x Male reader - Birthday

Today was your birthday, and to celebrate, You and your girlfriend, Yujin were going to celebrate by throwing a huge party.

You set everything up and people started arriving at around 7.

Soon enough people were joining the party and it was practically a beer festival at this rate.

Everyone in that party were drunk, including you.

Your girlfriend, Yujin, on the other hand, didn't drink a lot as she wanted to make sure nothing went wrong.

You noticed her sitting back and tried to walk towards her.

You legs were wobbly and you barely nade it to her before falling onto a chair next to her.

"The party just started and you're already drunk y/n" Yujin said.

"What, what d-do you mean, I've only had l-like 5 or 10 drinks", You said stuttering on your own words.

"You're going to regret drinking all of that tomorrow", She said.

"W-well *hiccup* Is today t-tomorrow, No. So let m enjoy *hiccup* this", You said while drinking another bottle of beer.

"Well if you're going to be acting like a child then I guess i'll have to treat you like a child", She said while snatching your beer and throwing it in the trash.

You tried to retaliate at stand up, but ultimately led to Yujin catching you before you fell.

"Take a rest, You can party more once You've recovered a bit".

You couldn't say anything back as you had a massive headache and a nap sounded just like the right thing.

Your arm was wrapped around Yujin as your legs felt like jelly and could break from the smallest impact.

"Ash, This is the exact reason why I don't drink as much anymore", Yujin said.(Later in the story)

"Well *hiccup* You're missing out". You said while you could barely stay conscious.

"Oh trust me y/n, I'm not missing out on anything", She said whole laying you down on the bed.

"I'll go make sure everything stays Outside the house, you go get some rest".

It didn't take you long as you passed out in a couple of seconds.

-A couple hours later- 11:30 Pm

You woke up and the first thing that hit you was a massive wave of nausea.

You went to the kitchen and took some medicine.

By this point, you thought the party ended

You were walking back to lay down until someone hugged you from behind.

It was Yujin, and boy did she reek Beer.

She had a geeky smile and could barely stand without wobbling.

"What happened to not drinking a lot Yujin", you said sarcastically.

She fell on you and couldn't even stand up properly.

You picked her up bridal style and walked towards your bedroom.

"Well Look how the tables have turned".

"Oh Shut up, I'm *hiccup* not even

*hiccup* that drunk".

You opened the door to your bedroom and Laid her on the bed.

You kissed her on her forehead before walking out.

But before you could leave she grabbed your shirt and tried to pull.

"Please Stay y/n".

You couldn't say no to her and decided to not fight back.

You hopped in bed with her and you could finally notice her beauty. Her beautiful eyes, Her droopy smile, and her pretty hair.

You kissed her before slowly falling asleep.

But little did you know the surprise that you would get once you woke up.

———

Once you woke up, You looked besides you to not find yujin.

You were confused as to where she was, when you felt a sensation, and it felt good.

Then you looked down, Only to see Yujin Sucking your dick.

You were startled and yujin looked at you with a smile.

"Good morning Babe, How did you sleep?" Yujin said while continuing to suck your dick.

"Oh uh um yeah I-I Slept fine".

You moaned as Yujin Went faster and faster.

"Ah Yujin, Your mouth Feels so good". You said while fixing her hair.

You fixed her hair as there was saliva all over your dick and yujin's Throat.

You grabbed her head and made her feel your full length as you moaned more and more.

You looked down to see Yujin's beautiful eyea staring at you with satisfaction.

"Yujin! Ahh, I'm about cum!" You alerted her as she took your whole length, and that was your limit.

You released your fluids into her mouth as she took it all.

"I never knew you had such a dirty side y/n", Yujin said as she teased you.

You started blushing as your lower body was completely naked.

Yujin kept teasing you before standing up and removing her clothes.

She jumped on top of started making out with you.

She pulled back as she took off her panties, revealing how wet she really was.

"Lets see how long the birthday boy can last~", Yujin said while teasing your dick before slowly sliding her pussy down your dick.

She Teased your dick more before finally sliding all the way down on your member.

"Oh, wow! Soo Big!".

Yujin started jumping up and down as you held her hips.

"Yujin, ahh Your so tight Yujin!" You said as you started moaning more and more from how tight and wet she was.

You flipped her over and instead you started leading.

You got on top of her and started inserting your dick inside of her.

You played with her nipples as she started moaning.

"Ahh! Y/n, Fuck me! Fuck me hard!"

She grasped onto your shoulders and started yelling your name as you fucked her harder, making sure every part of your shaft was inside of her.

"Yujin, Im about to cum!" You warned her.

"Cum inside me Y/n! Fuck! Cum inside me!"

You did as she said and released your load into her.

You fell next to her as she starts sleeping.

You admire her body before falling asleep yourself.

[kolour-me-kourt]

Chapter Seventeen: It’s 10:10 where you been?

They had finally made it to the point where Jayson didn't want her around anybody else . Everytime she was about to go out with friends he had something planned. She finally started getting frustrated. She planned a phone call so she was waiting for him to call and finally he did.

"Hey sexy how you doing?" She asked him smiling "I'm good I'm just tired bout to get in this ice bath" "I wanna do one with you next time" "that'll be fun can't wait to see you do that" "I'll be a thug" he slides into the water  "I bet but um what you wanted to talk about?" "I'm going out tonight with my friends" "oh okay I was hoping we could watch movies tonight" "bae this kinda what I needed to talk about I need some time with other people too ... okay? I still love you but" "you need some space?" he seemed sad she felt bad "I don't like how that sounds" "that's what you saying though?" "I like the texting and calling and finding movies to watch together but when I wanna step out I want your blessing to do it I don't wanna go out with my friends and then all I can think about is hurting your feelings " "ok I get that...just cause I like being in the house don't mean you should have to be glued to your bed when I'm not there ...I get it" "you promise?" "yes...so who you going out with? "a few of the girls" "going out to eat?" "yeah food and drinks..." "you know the restaurant?" "No why bae" "Im just asking...you'll be out late?" "possibly" He didn't like the way she was answering. She was being to vague and it pissed him off. "ight I'll hit you later" he hangs up "Uhhhhh no he didn't" yn stood there confused before she could call back her friend was calling.

Hiiii yn

hey boo

Im hype for tonight ...but what's wrong with you?

nothing just me and Jay...nothing

hmmm well fix that and ill see you later right?

yes I've been looking forward to this night

oh yeah so since we all gon be drinking can we just meet at your place and uber to the restaurant from your house

yeah ...do y'all wanna spend the night too? just leave tomorrow so everyone is safe

My man will probably pick me up unless y'all want a sleep over

I don't care just um ask everyone else....either way its fine

okay well ima let you go so you can get hype cause you not hype right now

yn slightly laughs my bad by the time yall get here Ill be ready.... I promise

mhm see you soon

see ya

                      call ended

Do I call Jayson back? or just wait.... yn thinks that was so strange for him to do and this was entering into toxic territory. She decided to put her phone on dnd and take a shower blasting her music and letting her phone charge. Once she got out of the shower she grabbed her phone taking it off of do not disturb and reading the notifications 5 missed calls two from her mama three from Jayson and several text messages after calling her mama back she read the group chat messages first the girls are on their way...that was ten minutes ago so that leaves her twenty. That's the good thing about meeting at her place she didn't have to be ready. When she went to Jayson message she got teary eyed so she decided to call back he answered on the first ring.

"I love you and im sorry that was so fuckin stupid" yn tears began to fall "Jay you make me not wanna go out" "I want you to go out I like when you to have fun...I just enjoy it more when Im with you or I get to come pick you up...or Im in the bed waiting for you that's all." "so fly down here...meet me in my bedroom so when I get back...I'll have something to look forward too" "bae..I can't just fly down there in two hours" "yes you can You're Jayson Tatum you can do anything baby....get yourself down here to me...and I'll show you how grateful I am" "... I can't do that tonight Bae .... But please go out and have fun" "okay I will" "let me know what you wearing" "you just wanna see?" "Yeah talk me through it while I'm in this Ice bath" she smiled going to her closet to pull out options.

"Soooo I have these black distressed jeans from fashion Nova .... Then I have this shirt to go with it..... but I didn't know if I wanted to dress up a little more so I also have this dress .... Or this shirt and skirt" "all those are fly bae idk... what everybody else wearing you don't wanna be under dressed compared to your friends" "you right im gonna wait until they get here to decide" YN sits back down staring at him slightly shiver it made her smile. "Wish I was in there with you.... Trying my hardest to warm you up" she smiled

"you so sexy..." "I'm not trying to be.... I just miss my man" "your man misses you too.... Don't get it confused" YN hears her doorbell so gets up going to the door. "When am I gonna see you next?" She opens the door letting her friends in "heyyyy girls" Asia and May come in "heyyy ... where your clothes" " on the bed ... im on the phone with Jay" "hey ladies!!" He says waving so YN let's them see the phone "heyyyy Jayson what you doing there?" May asks laughing making him shake his head

"my ice bath" "oh okay nice" "I was trying to see what y'all were wearing before I chose .... But it's on the bed" they take their shoes off going back to her room. "I like the jeans..." may said "I like the shirt you put with the skirt .... But I like it with the jeans" Asia says "that's fine can you find me some comfortable shoes too..." "yes you wearing heels though"

"Ima let you go bae... everybody be safe and I love you" Jayson says YN pouts "I love you too" "why you making that face" "I really really really miss you" "make sure she drink and have fun tonight ladies!!" "Oh trust me we will" "send me your outfit with the shoes I wanna see it on your body" "okay baby " "I'll see you later...bye" "byeee" she hangs up smiling

"Where's Trin?" "On the way she should be here in like five minutes" "okay and are y'all staying?" "Yes both of us" "okay go get your stuff then and y'all can sleep in the other room together"  as they head back to the living room for them to grab their stuff. Trin is at the door so they let her in. "I have a blow up mattress if you wanna spend the night" "yes I'll spend the night no point In making my man drive all the way over here" "okay bet we can do that when we get back so that it doesn't deflate" "okay .... Ima get the shots going" "okay let me go change real quick y'all can go ahead to the kitchen"

YN goes to her changing into her jeans and t shirt grabbing her heels and purse. Bringing it all down stairs. "You two shots behind" Trin says smiling. "Okayyy... pour me up" YN laugh taking her first shot and then the next.

"You feeling better?" "Yes me and him was beefing before my shower" "about what" "I don't wanna talk about it yall let's just go have fun" "who calling the Uber?" Asia asks "got you" may says "everybody spending the night?" "Yupp" "oooou okay let's go have fun" "the Uber only five minutes away.

"Everybody take two more shots" "lord" YN laughed they take their two shots and YN heads to the door to put her shoes on because she had to lace them up. "Uber arriving In two minutes.... Everybody got everything?" "Yesss let's stand outside everybody walks out YN sets her alarm and locks the door. Walking with her friends to the Uber.

"I forgot to take my full body picture for my baby" YN pouted "he checks your outfits?" Asia asked "he likes to see what I have on he likes the way I dress" YN smiled "nasty ass" trin said laughing "anyway somebody take my picture in front of the restaurant please."

"How is your night sir?" Trin asked the Uber driver "good real nice night" YN giggled "yeah she's drunk already" "it was four shots back to back and I can't name one thing I ate today" "bitch you knew we were going out why you ain't eat" "I said I can't name what I ate that don't mean I didn't eat" "you so damn annoying ..." "likewise" they arrive to the restaurant. "Take my pictures Asia please?" She laughed " yeh I got you" "ima check the reservation" trin says "okay I'll go with you" May says

YN poses for her pictures as Asia takes them sending them straight to Jayson.

"Okay your man texting" "thanks Asiaaaaaaaa....he so damn sexy look at how he hypes me" "you do look good friend.... Let's go"

When you get them shoes? You look so pretty baby

I got these a lil while ago Just never wore them

Well have fun tonight .... I'll talk to you when you get in

Okay baby I love youuuuu

I love youuuu

YN and Asia walked into the restaurant and then they were seated. "Can I start you guys off with any drinks?" "Lemon drops all around please" "drink or shot" "one of each "okay great I'll get that in for you guys.

           * time skip*

"Damn how long we been waiting for the checks?" May asked YN laughed at least 10 minutes the waitress walks back by "excuse me" "yes?" "Yeah we were asking about our checks" "oh sorry your bill was paid I can bring you a receipt" "everybody bill? Or just hers?" Asia asked "everyone's bill it was all on one ticket" "did you get a tip too?" "Yupp" "oh great okay then yeah a receipt would be great" "alright I'll be right back" "who Tf paid for us?" Trin asked "idk but call that Uber so we can get tf out before they realize" YN laughed soon the waitress brought the receipt back out and they all got up heading outside and soon the Uber was there.

Heading homeeee with the girls

Okay be safe

Always daddy💕💦

Mmmmm you gon show me later

You asking?

Did you see a question mark?

😂😂😂 no

Exactly stop playing with me

I don't know who you think you talking to but this is your girlfriend

Nah

.... This my wife

😂😂👀 wait until I get alone ... you can see whatever you wanna see.

Oh wow.... You like that huh?

Stop playing with meeeeeee

After getting out of the Uber. "Who's car is that YN?" "I can't see that far tbh" YN laugh unlocked the door and turning the alarm off. "Im gonna go change and then I'll meet y'all back down here. "Everybody take fifteen minutes" "okayyyy" YN walked to her room and screamed

"baby!!!!!" "Mmmm hey sexy" Jayson picks her up "you made it" he kissed her lips slowly "I did... and you're not alone" "it doesn't matter" "it does though" "why?" "I'm not fuckin you when you got people in the house" "my friends don't care I promise .... I can suck your dick in front of them and they wouldn't care" "oooou let's do that" she rolled her eyes "that was just an example don't play" "you don't wanna share me?" "Never" "let me go say hey to your people"

"Wait they getting theirselves together I gotta make sure everybody decent before you go down there" "y'all just be walking around naked?" "Hate to kill your fantasy but no😂😂" "no fantasy .... I only think about you. In fact I was thinking about what was gonna happen when you saw me here..... but we can just chill tonight I did miss you" "bae we're having sex tonight .... And I mean that" she smiled "only if you sure nobody will be mad" "first of all it's my house secondly they're gonna know you're here .... And when is the next time I'm gonna see my baby? And have time to get some? They care about me they know I need this" he laughed

"you need me?" "Mhm but since I love them so much I'm not on my knees yet" "when you tell everybody you was coming back down?" "Trin said everybody come in like 15 minutes it's already been like 8 tho" "that gives me time.... Let me eat it real quick ... so I know you'll still want me later" YN didn't hesitate she removed her jeans getting on the bed "I missed you baby" YN says looking up into his eyes he pulls her body closer kissing her lips and sliding a finger inside of her.

"You stay wet for me" he kisses down her body as she gets excited to feel his lips and tongue ... he kisses her thighs she whined causing him to smirk. "Baby?" "Hmm?" "Can you eat my pussy... please?" "Of course baby girl" and with that she felt his tongue lick in between her folds still not focusing on her clit but at this moment it was okay cause it still felt good he glanced at her and then placed her clit in his mouth sucking softly.  "Ahhhh" her hips started to move up and down as she began to lose her breath.

"Mmmmmmmm" he moaned against her really causing her to shake. "Oh Jay.... Feels so good" she says softly "you wanna cum for me? Or you wanna see your friends?" "I wanna cummmm" her breath was heavy she was so close he smiled

Let's get real for a second Jayson has no intentions on sharing YN with anyone right now maybe ever.... If his tongue and lips are what's gonna get her to stay in her bedroom then that's what he'll use. "Ride my face bae" he lays on his back she hovers over his face and he pulls her closer "ahhh" "I don't know why you like to play ... suffocate me" her hips begin to rotate against his face the closer she got the harder it was for her to stay on his face

"wait Bae....." his fingers slide inside of her. "Oh gosh oh goshhhhh" "YN YOU READY?" ".....ONE SEC GUYS" "don't stop baby pleaseeee" her legs began to shake around his head "Jayson yes yes yesssss oh baby I'm cumming" she whined softly releasing on his face she heard him slurping her juices up.

"Jay please please pleaseeee" he let go of her and she slowly slides off his face down his chest and to his waist "torture" he groaned she kissed his lips "bae I loved this surprise but I have to make sure every one is good ... come say hey and then you can come back up here" "my dick is hard" "I'll ride it later .... I promise" he laughed slightly "give me a second go head down" "okay Bae"

She gets up grabing her pajama shorts going down stairs she left the door slightly open. "What took you so long?" May asked "well ... Jayson came and surprised me ... he's upstairs" "oh he not gon come say hey?" Asia asked "he is ... soon" "well shit I guess we can all just go to sleep" trin says "why? I'll stay out here with y'all" Jayson comes downstairs smiling bright his basketball shorts lowkey revealing all that belong to YN she bits her lip standing in from of him. He instantly wraps his arms around her,

"Hey ladies sorry to intrude I didn't know you were spending the night" "have you met everybody?"YN asked looking up "Umm no" he laughed YN shook her head "Trin, Asia, and May" "hey I'm Jayson"

"Treating our girl right?" Trin asked "you gotta ask her that I think I'm doing a pretty good job" he kissed the top of YN head making her smile "he ight" he slaps her ass "ima let y'all chill I'll be upstairs... pleasure to met you all " Jayson says walking off "she'll be up soon too Jayson" trin says

"Are you sure?" "You never get to see him ... go enjoy your man" "thanks girls... I'll keep it down... or try too" YN laughed loudly "we got headphones shit" trin says YN gives them a hug while laughing "see y'all in the morning" they all say bye as YN walks back to her room.

"Damn that was quick" he was laying in bed on his phone he glanced up when she walked in "they said I should enjoy you being here.... And I agree" "I ever told you I love your friends?" She laughed "I'll make sure they know" "come here" she walks over to him slowly. "Right here?" He pats his lap "nah .... Up here .... Trying to see something" she smiles straddling him "I do wanna thank you for coming Fr.... I know you had to go out of your way and you'll probably have to leave hella early" "nah you got me..... don't worry about me leaving" she bits her lip "hard not too" "hmmm... come back wit me then it's Friday night" he kissed her lips softly grabbing her ass squeezing.

"For how long?" "Sunday night ... I know you gotta work Monday" she smirked "convince me🫣😉" next thing she knew she was on her back pinned down. "You talk all that shit over the phone... you forget it's different when I'm here" "maybe I want this reaction" "one of these days you're not gonna get it" he slides inside of her making her gasp he doesn't move  "why not?" "Why would you?" He laughed moving his hips slightly  "fuck" she says softly "nah you gon have to make some noise for me...." she laughed slightly

"Jayson please" "please what?" He kissed her lips "go slow I'm tipsy" "you wanna stop?" "Did I say that?" She smirked "YN what did I ask you" she rolled her eyes he stops "I don't want you to stop Jayson" she whined "you really a big ass brat" she kisses his lips as he pulls out "Jay—" "shhh I got you" he slides back in deeply going slow she closed her eyes "that feel good?" She opened her mouth but couldn't say much "hmm?" He asks "-Y—e-ssss"it came out broken but he liked when she couldn't speak.

His thrust were slow and deep as he continued to kiss her. The kissing was just as intense as his hips moving she moved her legs to wrap around his waist but they were already shaking. "Fuck" he groaned in her ear. "Baby?" She asked he bit his lip focusing on anything but her soft moans and how good she felt but naturally his hips started to go faster "Jaysonnn—- fuck" his hand began to rub her clit because he knew he wasn't gonna last much longer "hmm? What you want?" "Don't cum yet" he took a deep breath pulling out his face was quickly in between Her thighs eating her out again

"ahhhuuhghgh" she moaned loudly slapping her hand across her mouth his big hands grabbed her boobs stimulating her nipples. "Hold and spread your legs" slowly but surely she lifted her legs spreading them she watched  as his tongue placed patterns all over her clit. "Yesss baby yess"

He hummed bringing her closer to his face. Two fingers slipped inside her massaging her g spot as his thumb rubbed her clit. He kissed up her body to her lips "cum for me likes this okay?" "Yesss yesss" "I want you to squirt all over this fuckin bed you hear me? Cum for me" "ahh!!" "YN do what I fuckin said" her body shook as he brought her closer and closer and closer and then she lost it completely.

A shaking moaning mess  he kisses her sliding back inside he places his hands on the backs of her thighs so that her legs can stay up and pinned to the bed. "This dick is so good.... It's deep" "yeah? I'm deep" "so deep baby" "you can feel it?" "Yesss daddy I feel it" "ooou where you feel it?" "In my stomach fuck....don't stop" he was hoping that orgasm was gonna keep her at bay but ... he was wrong she needed more she wanted more.

"I can feel you... squeezing me ... you holding it" "I don't want you to stop and you keep trying to" "why you don't wanna stop" he slows down "Jayson please" "I'm asking" "it's feels good I ju—-ughhhh fuck oh fuck oh fuckkkkkkkkkkkk yessssss right there right there" " don't hold nothin unless I tell you to ... do you hear me?" "Fuckkkk" he feels her relax and immediately after her juices start to flow out of her. Then he pulls out flipping her over and pulling her hips to him teasing her a little bit and then sliding back inside her.

"Yes yes yessss" "still deep?" "Yesss Jayson so fuckin ughhhhh" "your arch is amazing don't lose it" "oh fuckkkk" "bounce that ass on me" he pauses his movements so she could do exactly what he said "look at me when you do that shit" she glanced back and as soon as she did he grabbed her hips fucking her again. She burried her face back into the mattress. "Uh uh... gimmie that pussy baby" he pulls her hair "fuckkkk Jayson I'm about to—-" "you can't beg for me to stay in you if you don't know how to take my dick..... take it" he spanks her ass making her lose it completely.

She slides his dick out of her turning around to suck him. "You want me to cum?" "Mhmm daddy I want you to cum in my mouth" he grabs her hair as she continued to suck him slowly while stroking. "Look at me baby" he said softly his voice sounding horse from all the groaning. She continued to moan as he finally released in her mouth he held her head until he was finished. She slowly removed her mouth swallowing. She sits looks up at him. "I'm ready for bed" he shook his head kissing her forehead. "Let's go to sleep then. "Turn that fan on please" she says and then rolls to the side of the bed she usually lets him sleep on.

"What you doing?" "I figured you would wanna sleep in the wet spot cause I don't" "you made it wet you sleep in it" "no" she smiled Jayson walks over picking her up placing her on the floor and then getting in the bed. "Lay on top of me then" "to sleep?" "Yeah... come here" "I don't wanna crush your little frame" "stop playing with me" "just sleep bae" "tell yourself that ... cause I know that" YN gets on top of him pulling the cover over both of them. "I could've just changed the sheets and comforter" "I think you got the mattress wet" "I didn't though" "mmm okay" "sucker" he grabbed her face kissing her slowly "goodnight big head I love you" " I love you too"

      *the next Morning*

YN felt guilty for leaving her friends so she got up early fixing everyone breakfast. French toast bacon and hash browns. Trin was the first one up and out then Asia sauntered out eventually May came too.

"Surprised you up and walking around" Trin says "of course y'all heard me dammit" YN laughed "I didn't think you was trying to be quiet" Asia said "it don't matter regardless though" Trin jumps back in "I was ... but y'all know me the sex is actually really good and I'm already extra so you put two and two together" everyone laughed "he had to leave?"

"No he's still upstairs I'm trying to decide if I was going to with him when he leaves today" "I mean when would you come back?" "Sunday night... which seems pointless right?" "Not if he wants you there I feel like if you can you should" Asia says YN bits her lips "I get that too" Jayson comes in on que

"Goodmorning ladies" "Goodmorning Jayson" they say in unison YN laughs while rolling her eyes. he walks over to her kissing her slowly "Goodmorning to you especially" "Goodmorning ... you wanna eat with us?" "Yeah I'll eat with y'all what's going on" "welll I was talking about you" YN smiled "yeah I'll take my breakfast in the living room" he joked sitting down YN brings his plate "nooo I want you here" "so what about me?" "Nothing too bad just im coming with you today" "good"

Everyone continues to eat and talk until one by one the girls left. "You cooked so I'll get the dishes" Jayson looked down at her kissing her forehead "you can just rinse and put them in the dish washer .... I'll go pack" "okay sounds good to me..." "you sure?" She smiled he look like he was pouting "gimmie kiss" she licked her lips slowly. "When you get done" "mmmm no now" she smiled walked over to him kissing his lips quickly.

"That's good?" "One more" She tried to kisses him quickly again but he added tongue so she started kissing back and then he pulled away. "Go get packed" she bit her lip walking away going up the stairs.

One thing she didn't wanna admit to her friends is the perspective she's gained from last night to tonight ....she's noticed that he honestly doesn't wanna share her and it's not just something cute he likes to say. Of course she invited him last night. But he got the plane and made it to her within 3 hours meaning he got his pilot and staff to the jet in a hour.... He was ready for the invite in other words. Did he have them on call? He walks into her closet staring

"do I need anything nice for dinners? Or are we just staying in?" "You should bring a few outfits for dates" "conservative?" "Not too conservative... but maybe one or two we are having dinner with my mom and her boyfriend" "am I invited?" "I just told you what to wear? Is that not obvious" she laughed slightly "I guess I'm just a little confused .... you didn't know I would be there tonight so how are you making plans for me and you ... and other people?" "I was already having dinner with them and now you're coming home so of course you're coming what's wrong?" She walked over to him holding him close "baby I am home" "you know what I'm saying" she walked away sighing "Maybe we need some space?"

[sweet-villain]

After reading The Untold I need some Joseph flufffffffff

author's note: I always love writing angst, you know me but I'm always making up for it <3

Summary : Joe tells you how he feels over text at 2 in the morning

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

@ceriseheaven @josephquinnlover0 @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch @stillfalling30minslater

It's 2 in the morning when your phone buzzes besides on your bedside table. You had fallen sleep, you were curled up in a ball sleeping soundly with your blanket pulled up your chin and instead of peacefully sleeping your phone is ringing.

It's Joe, your best friend since you were a little girl, he wasn't calling you, it was a text that he sent a two in the morning. You smile at his name light up on your phone. When you unlock your phone, it's a link he sent you to a cat meme. It wasn't just one. It was about 10.

After the 10 amount of memes there is a long text, squinting at the light of your phone, you begin to read.

" I know this is so stupid to do this over text. I don't know why I'm choosing to do this over text. But I've already started writing and I am not going to stop ranting to you until I am done. Here it goes, I have been in love with you. No, erase that. I've been crazy in love with you since I was 15 years old. I'm too afraid to tell you face to face how I feel because every time I look at you, I fall more in love with you by the minute. I don't ever, ever, ever want to lose you. Not even controlling myself over text telling you how I feel about you. Wesley, Jamie, Grace, my parents keep telling me I've got to tell you before I really lose my mind. I am so in love with you and everything about you. You are my favorite person. I really want to be with you, have you by my side as mine. I really do hope you feel the same way and give this a shot. If not, that's okay too. I still would love to be a part of your life, because I want you in mine. You're everything to me. I will learn to push these feelings aside if you don't feel the same way. I will find a way to cope. I feel so stupid how I wrote this but I need you to know the truth. I don't know what else to say. Text me. Call me. Say something to me. I can't bare the silence from you if you decide you don't want to talk to me. Please.

You chuckle yourself. Oh Joe, you're such an idiot.

You click the call button and it rings, he picks it up immediately. It's quiet on the other line. He's afraid what you are going to say.

" I've been in love with you too Joe for years now"

On the other line you can hear him sighing in relief and giggling being so happy.

" Can I see you tomorrow?" he asks, yawning.

" Well I hope so" he is smiling ear to ear on the other line as he grips his phone in his hands, you are on speaker. Wesley is right next to him and you can hear like a clapping sound.

" Did you just high five someone?" you asked.

" Yes, Wesley" he giggles, his cheeks are red. You knew him so well.

" God, you're such a dork, Joe"

" You love me"

" Oh I do, you have no idea how much"

[beombeomlovesme]

16/10

Warnings: Drunk Beomgyu, that's it

Content under the cut, no gender is set on reader here so everyone is welcome <3

"Heyyy~"

"Beomgyu, where are you?"

Yeah, okay so you were doing this again. If someone forced you to count how many times Beomgyu has drunkly called you the answer would be 'too many'. As that franktly is the reality. Sometimes you have to question yourself for still being friends with him, but in the end it all boiled down to one thing.

You liked him.

A lot.

But to tell him your feelings? Yeah no, out of the picture.

"Uuhhh, some, bar? I don' know can send you my location though"

"Is anyone there with you?"

"Yeah!! Yeonjun is... was here..."

You audibly sigh at the total wreck the tall boy is. Hair totally disheavled and bangs falling into his droopy eyes. He keeps trying to fight them off but due to his lack of energy to keep his head propped up the efforts are in vain. You slightly readjust your grip on his arm. "Gyu why are you always out drinking and begging me to pick you up. This is getting so annoying I might just move in with someone else"

"No!! No you can't do that"

You sligthly look over at him to see his eyes already searching for yours. You were not having his bullshit drunk talk again. It's the second time this month already. "Beomgyu get in the car" "No gyu???" Yeah, remind yourself to tell him off tomorrow morning when he's gotten over the hangover.

"___, you have to listen to me! I'm talking to you pleaseee. How many times do I have to tell you..." if he doesn't shut up you might suffocate him. "You're just drunk, gyu. Now go to bed so I can also go to sleep. It's 3AM I really don't want to do this right now"

"Sleep with me then"

"No." You fear you might be fighting a loosing battle at this point. Beomgyu is looking at you with a pout practically begging you to go in bed with him. As much as it would be a dream come true, the rational part of your brain is telling you it's not worth the risk, the regret tomorrow and besides. He reeks of alcohol right now. You take one last look at him before deciding to leave his room and go get yourself ready for bed.

"I love you."

"Go to bed gyu I'm begging you"

You turn off the lights before closing his bedroom door.

---------------------------------------------

Everything written is owned by me, no reposting without credit! This is written to be viewed on phone. Likes, comments, reblogs etc. Greatly appreciated <3

[suugrpop]

WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT? | Chapter 2

Pairing: Jake Seresin x female reader

Summary: Phoenix decides to take you in a party at Hard Deck and Jake seresin (your enemie since you've been in top gun) can't take his eyes off of you.

Previous chapter | next chapter

~

You wake up with a headache in a place you don't know. Your head spins and you also remember you don't have to work today. You heard some footsteps coming closer and you pretend you're still sleeping.

Someone opens the door and sits in the corner of the bed. "Y/N" - he says. "What? That's Jake's voice". You think. You look if you still have your clothes on. You did. That means you didn't sleep with him.

"Y/N" - he repeats. You open your eyes slightly and look at his way. "You're okay?" - he asks. " I made coffee if you want some". The only thing that comes to your mind is to escape. Is he really being nice? Does he like me? You wake up as fast as you can with your dress still on.

" I can't, but thanks". Before you even cross the door, Jake takes you by your arm to look at you.

"Please, stay" - but you can't.

"I'm sorry". You leave Jake's house to call Penny to come pick you up.

When Penny comes, you sit in her car. The way she stares at you tells you everything you need to know.

"I won't even talk about it" - you say.

"I think he's just messing with me, I know". Penny starts the car, and asks you

"How do you even know, have you asked him?" - You start thinking if Playboy and Hangman had a bet going on.

"I don't know, but I'm not in the mood for another heartbreak". You replied, remembering the guy who cheated on you in highschool.

Penny finally takes you home and you thank her. You make some coffee to make up for your hangover and went to sleep all day. You'd still have to work tomorrow.

It's 6:00 am and your alarm rings. You wake and take a quick shower, have breakfast and brush your teeth. You start your car to get to work. The first thing you notice when you arrive is that Jake's car is parked. You get out and start walking to the dressing room to get changed. You say good morning to the girls.

You're done getting ready and start doing some paperwork. You don't see Jake around and you don't hope to, you're gonna avoid him anyway. It's later in the noon and you get up from your seat to get some coffee. You see Phoenix talking to Halo in the hallway and decide to go with them. Jake's laugher sounds echoing the hallway and you get nervous. It's like your body needs to run away every time you see him, but you don't wanna get hurt again. Your eyes meet but you still avoid him anyway. He just stares at you and the girls but you kept talking. He's talking to Payback about going for some drinks at the Hard Deck. Your muscles finally relax and you go back to work.

It's almost 10 pm and you get a text message from Penny. " I need you tonight at the Hard Deck. Be ready in 30 minutes, and I won't take no for an answer." A deep sigh comes out your mouth but you didn't have a choice. Penny's daughter had an exam tomorrow and had to study. You walk to the dressing room and take a quick shower. Your hair's in a ponytail and you're wearing a white tank top and black jeans with some Converse. You start your car to drive to the Hard Deck. Music's blasting so hard you can hear it when you get out the car. You cross your finger and wish that Jake has cancelled his plans.

You enter through the back door of the Hard Deck to avoid seeing anyone. You weren't in the mood to party or anything like that. You got into the dressing room to save your things. When Penny sees you she greets you with a smile.

"I didn't know if you were gonna make it" - she jokes. You smile and hug her.

After a few hours passed, you were sweaty as hell. Only a few minutes left and you were going to be in your bed. You did see a few of your team mates having fun and even offered them some beers. You though Jake wasn't there, but when Payback asked for two beers in the bar, you thought that maybe Jake was here but not inside. You take a peek and see him playing rugby with some of your team mates.

"Like what you see?" - Penny asks. She takes you out of your thoughts and your cheeks flustered. Jake might be an asshole, but he's hot.

"No! What's wrong with you! - you obviously lied.

You didn't see Jake for the rest of the night. You were taking your things to go back home. When you get out, none of the boys were playing in the beach.

"Avoiding me, huh?" You jump in your seat and see Jake in a Hawaiian shirt and tanned skin.

"Excuse me?" You ask. He laughs and gets closer. You can feel his eyes all over your body. Just like that night at the Hard Deck.

"You didn't wanna have coffee at my place, didn't a say a word to me at work.. what's going on"? Fuck. He caught you.

"I'm not avoiding you, I'm just not interested. That's all." That smile of him has you going crazy. You were craving for his lips. His taste. Just a little bit of him.

"Really?" He says.

"Yeah. I'm not interested into guys that makes girls believe to fall in love with someone how's gonna leave them the next morning." You took your shot. It was now or never. His mouth opens, like he's offended.

"You think that's the kind of guy I am?" You thought about the time you entered Top Gun and Phoenix, who you didn't know yet, warned you about Jake.

"Then tell me why all of the girls warned me about you. Told me not to get close to you". You didn't know why, but your voice was breaking and your eyes were watery.

"I've changed. Believe me". He got closer to you trying to confort you. You only took a step back, without looking into his eyes. Jake sighs.

"Please, Jake, let me go. We both know we don't want this". You say.

"Don't ask me to do something that I can't". He replies. You only escape right now is to run, like you always do. You're a coward. You were only in Top gun because your reasons to life were empty. Nobody knew that though. You were cold. Cold as ice. So you ran. You only hear Jake's voice calling your name.

When you arrive to your apartment, your body let's you down and you fall on the floor, with tears in your eyes. "This is this las time." You promised to yourself. You're going to disappear, vanish from everyone's life. They didn't deserve you anyway.

[come-away-with-me87]

All I Need Chapter 10

Chapter 9 here

******

After unpacking, you sat down on your couch and picked up your phone, pulling up the most recent text conversation you had with Shouta.  You stared at your phone for what felt like hours, when you finally felt brave enough to start typing, "Hey Shouta, I'm home.  Is there any way we can talk tonight?"  You pressed Send, and awaited his response.  A couple of minutes went by, and he finally responded, "Yes. Want to meet in the common area at 7?"  You replied back, "works for me, see you then."  He didn't want to be alone with you in either of your dorms; you really couldn't blame him.  You decided to lay down on your couch and take a nap; it was still a few hours away from 7:00pm, and emotions of these past few days finally caught up to you.

You fell into a dreamless sleep, and woke up two hours later with drool running down your face.  Damn, you must have been tired to sleep that long.  At that point, it was 6:30pm, so you decided to get ready for your conversation with Shouta.  You decided to dress comfortably again, and put on a pair of sweat shorts, a pullover hoodie, and your slippers.  You threw your hair up into a ponytail, and walked out your door down the hallway to the staff common area.  Shouta was already sitting there in one of the lounge chairs when you arrived, scrolling on his phone.  "Hi, Shouta," you announced yourself.  "Hi, Y/N," he replied with a polite smile, then motioned for you to sit in the other lounge chair across from him.

You sat down, "you know, I had everything planned in my head of what I was going to say, and wouldn't you know it, it just vanished."  He just looked at you thoughtfully, "Y/N, what happened the other night..." he paused, and you looked up at him, feeling scared of what he was going to say next, "...should have never happened.  I'm so sorry."  You looked at him in awe, "Shouta, you have absolutely nothing to be sorry for.  I'm the one who initiated...that.  It's my fault."  He shook his head, "I don't think either of us were at fault.  We both had a bit to drink that night, and just got a little carried away, that's all.  It didn't mean anything."  You opened your mouth to say something about his feelings for you, but instantly shut it, remembering you swore Hizashi to secrecy.  To the best of your knowledge, Shout didn't know that you heard about his feelings for you.

So instead, you said back to him, "you're right...it didn't mean anything."  You both sat there for several minutes, both of you frowning without even realizing it.  You finally looked up at him and asked him, "we're still friends, right?"  He snapped his head up and looked at you, "of course we are, Y/N.  You're one of my closest friends, nothing changes that."  You genuinely smiled for the first time that night, "good, I'm so glad to hear that."  He smiled back at you, "of course."  Suddenly, the tension was gone, and you two went right back to the way things were, which you were so grateful for.  You asked him how the students have been, you missed them while you were gone.  You two then talked about all of the antics that went down while you were away, laughing together.

"I can't wait to get back to work, I miss those damn kids.  Do you want to walk to the school together tomorrow?"  He smiled up at you, "sure thing.  For now, though, I think it's best if I get going back to my dorm, I still have to plan my lessons for the week ahead."  He stood up, and you stood up along with him.  "I'll walk back with you, since we're neighbors and all," you said with a smile, "I still have a lot of paperwork to catch up on."  You walked down the hallway and got your respective rooms, and bid each other goodnight.  You were happy that things were back to normal.  

******

To be continued!

[bangchan4life]

Felix x reader

He surprises you for your birthday (light smut towards the end)

You and Felix had been dating for 3 years. Every moment with him was like a dream, he always made you feel comfortable around him. He was the only person you could see yourself with, and you felt so lucky that you got to see him EVERY DAY.

Or not.

A year has gone by without Felix, and you can't help but miss him more with each day that passes. He told you that he'd be back soon, or so he thought, but with his new job in modeling along with his boy group, more and more project plans get accepted across the world. Thus, making his stay longer than expected.

Today was like any other day. You got up in the morning, got ready, and went to work. You were a hairdresser for an entertainment company, which is how you ended up meeting Felix.

As soon as you got home, you couldn't help but feel exhausted. Not only from the stress at work, but...

You remembered that tomorrow was your birthday. The first one without Felix since you guys had gotten together.

You couldn't help but feel sad, but you tried not to be too down about it. You knew this oppurtunity meant a lot to Felix, and you respected his decision in choosing to go international.

You set down your stuff, and went to take a shower. The heat from the shower was kind of overwhelming, so after you felt kind of faint. You finished up in the bathroom, and head out to the living room.

You pull out your phone, only to see many missed calls from Felix. You quickly call him back, but on snapchat, hoping that you didn't miss anything important, or even worse, if it were an emergency...

He picks up the phone almost instantly.

"Felix?? Are you okay??"

You say, in a panicky tone. He slightly chuckles, and says

"Of course baby, why wouldn't I be? I was just calling you to tell you some exciting news."

You exhale, and say

"That's good, I was showering so I didn't know if something happened to you, I'm sorry. Well, what's the news?"

He's silent for a moment, as you can hear the sound of many people in the back.

"Felix? You there?"

There's still more noise of chatter in the back, when all of a sudden you hear a THUD, then the tone of someone hanging up.

You sigh, thinking that he must have been busy. You were kind of expecting a little message or something from him, it being your birthday and everything tomorrow.

You leave him a snap chat, saying

**You must be busy, so I wanted to say that I love you! Call me back when you can tonight, okay?**

It says that he's in the chat, but even after you wait 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 20 minutes...There's still no response. You feel uneasy, and kind of upset, so you decide to get up, get a glass of wine, and watch a movie in your living room.

It's not long after that you start to feel sleepy, so you decide to turn everything off and move to your room. You transfer the movie onto your TV, and decide to lay down and relax.

You find yourself constantly checking your phone, but still no reply from felix.

Is he purposely ignoring me..? But how did I upset him...

You can't help but continuously overthink it, so you decide to just put your phone down and go to bed. Your eyes start to water, so you constantly blink away the tears before you finally drift to sleep...

A little bit before the middle of the night, you notice the sound of your door opening. You don't open your eyes, but you think it's your cat, Mr, Dinkles, entering your room. You turn to lay on your other side, and slowly drift back to sleep, when...

"Surprise."

You hear a deep voice say. You instantly open your eyes, and it reveals felix, who's laying next to you, opening his arms, inviting a hug. Without a second going by, you push yourself into his arms. You can't help but squeal with you, as you say

"Felix!!! Oh my god, I thought you still had stuff to do at work, what are you doing here?-"

He takes one hand from your embrace and wipes you eye, seeing as they're red.

"Have you been crying..?"

He says, with a worried look on his face. You can tell by the tone in his voice as he says that, that he's a little upset.

"Oh, um."

You say looking down.

"Not too much, I was just worried that you were mad at me is all. But, I'm totally fine now..!"

You say, but then he pulls you into a deeper hug.

"I was never mad at you, I promise. I'm sorry I made you cry, and I'm sorry that I never responded."

You feel comfort in his words, and smile.

"It's okay, Felix. I know you've been busy, it's not bothering me anymore, I'm serious."

He sighs, but lets out a small chuckle.

"Actually, I was expecting you to be upset. You see, I was at the airport, trying to surprise you. I was going to ask you to come pick up someone I knew, but then my phone dropped. I tried to talk to you, but you weren't answering, so as soon as I looked at my phone screen, I realized it broke. I was really irritated.."

Your eyes widen slightly, then you can't help but laugh. Rather than a laugh, it as more of a...cackle.

Felix smirks, as he looks at you.

"What? You find this funny? Is my frustration amusing to you?"

He says, as he watches you laugh even more. He can't help but watch you, as your pretty face lights up with each moment you laugh. He puts a hand on your cheek, caressing it, as your laughs slowly but surely disappears.

You look him right in the eye, and give him a soft smile.

"You don't understand how much I missed you, your smile, your touch..."

He says, as he pulls his face close into mine. I give in to it, wrapping my arms around his neck, as he pulls me to be on top of his lap.

I passionately kiss him, as I feel his hands travel from my shoulders, to my hips, to my waist. My body shivers with excitement, as I let out small gasps between each kiss. I can tell he gets excited at this, because I can feel something bulging between his thighs.

He pauses, then looks at me, and says

"Hah...I'm sorry. I didn't think I'd be this excited about a kiss."

I let out a soft giggle, and say

"No need for apologies. I'll help you out a bit, yeah?"

you steadily get up from his lap, and move down towards the bottom of the bed. You tease his dick through his pants, as you slowly start to unzip them and pull it out.

"Hah...Y/N.."

He pants, looking down at me

"You're making me go crazy..."

you slowly put your mouth over the tip, circling your tongue around it, before you suddenly push it towards the back of your throat. He's pretty big, and by pretty big I mean HUMOUNGOUS. But, that doesn't stop you.

(You were DEFINTELY a throat goat.)

You can hear him let out grunts, pants, and low toned whimpers. You feel him coming closer, but you tease him by stopping when he's about to reach his climax.

"Ha-Hah...Huh? Y/N..."

His deep voice whines, as he looks at you.

"Please...don't tease me. I've been waiting so long..."

He looks down at you with a sweet but seductive look on his face, as he's begging you to let him finish. You give into that look, while letting him abruptly cum in your mouth. He's panting, and looking at you with eyes of lust.

You rub your eyes, indicating that you're tired.

"Shh...rest now."

He says, gently lifting you up to lay next to him.

"I wont leave you again, I can't handle being without you for that long..."

He gives you a little kiss on your forehead, as he quickly checks the time. It's 12:00. He smiles as he lays your head on his chest.

"Oh, and happy birthday."

[thehazbins]

OOC // It has been.... a day. Sorry, I usually try to keep things chill and fine but man I started crying because Applebee's got my order wrong. Today has been so full of bullshit, I genuinely hope tomorrow goes better or I'm gonna lose my shit. If you wanna read about my day- feel free to proceed. I won't be upset if you don't though.

First off, I couldn't sleep well last night. I fell asleep at like 5am? Woke up at 11 so I got alright sleep but it was not what I wanted. But that was fine. Didn't get time to grab breakfast before leaving for work since my partner was picking up, there was a whole car thing. But I think okay, sure.

I go to order breakfast from this fruit bowl place I like, for a solid 10 minutes door dash is saying "Pick up only." Which is annoying. Eventually it fixes and I go back, debating the restaurant but decide fuck it- I'll do the fruit bowl place. They messed up the order a few times but I was like surely I'll be better this time.

Wrong. I asked for no pineapple, extra banana. Usually this is no issue. Cheaper for them in fact. They left the pineapple, and removed the banana. This is the second fucking time. Like at least give me the regular amount of banana. Come the fuck on.

So it's fine. It's my coworkers last day at the shop so I ask him to make me a drink. A final coffee made my him before he calls it quits. Sure. Makes sense. If you saw my post earlier, you know where this is going.

He goes to leave, the coffee grinder goes weird and I have him come back and fix it since he hadn't gotten out the door. I go on about the day. Answer some questions then go over to the coffee bar and go to make a mocha. It's sticking a little weird so I get tired of the super pumping of it and grab it to clean it out. A actual small plume of green comes out of it. I just stare and pull it out. The whole length of the pump and inside of the bottle is coated in mold. So the drink I had... had that.

I basically just panic for the rest of the day. Which wasn't long but thankfully my partner was very kind and came in and chatted with me and helped me out while I cleaned. I just tossed the whole thing of chocolate sauce.

I get home, cool. We're gonna play a game a bit. I work on replies a bit then we get playing and there's no real moment to. Okay that's fine. Then we get this REALLY fun lucky break, we finish one of the events, and the world changes- so NO ONE knows we just did it. The treasure room is open too. Fuck yeah now we have an extra key. We don't know if we can unlock another but hell we're gonna try. So we grab shit annnnd then we get fucking jumped and obliterated by a PVP guy. We get one win and sell two of the more expensive items we have but that's about all we could manage.

So we're frustrated, go back to try to get revenge and the PVP guys just kill us again and we're like okay fuck off. And just- leave. Decide to hop out of the game. Dinner time, we're both hungry. We go cool we had plenty of left overs of katsu left.

JK roommates ate it all for lunch.

I'm so frustrated and trying not to be upset at roommates, it was really just like ANOTHER thing it wasn't a big deal. My partner goes. "Let's order something you want. Make the day better." So it's too late for what I really want but I settle for applebees.

My order is so fucking wrong when it gets here. I wanted just a plain cheese quesadilla. I bite into it, it's got pico or some shit on it. My partner goes out because my roommates are making dinner for one of them and they ask if I can be included.

I ended up getting alfredo but it was just... so tiring. I'm so over it. One of these would be NOTHING but all of it just kept piling on and I'm just like please for the love of stars please. Let me be.

[ellieloverr]

My Strange addiction P. 4

Warning ⚠ Language, Body Image Issues, making out, Teasing ⚠

✧༺✦✮✦༻∞ ∞༺✦✮✦༻✧✧༺✦✮✦༻

Ellie's eyes looked at you in worry. Your eyes departed suddenly by the buzzing of your phone. It was your alarm for bed but you didn't fell right going to bed with Ellie injured badly. You turned your alarm off and got up and went to go find the alcohol pads for Ellie so she won't get an Infection. You found them in Jesse's room. You got on your knees in front of Ellie and held her face still. She flinched because it had stung .

It's alright I'm almost done.

Once you were done you handed Dina a rag to dry her cut on her forehead.

I'mma head out I have work early in the morning

Yea ok I'll be there in a bit

Be safe kid

Bye

You walked out of Jesse's apartment and by the time you were in bed Dina had came back. You couldn't sleep knowing that Ellie was hurt badly. You decided to go for a walk around your neighborhood. You grabbed a sweater and but on sweat pants. You grabbed your phone and head phones and played "BAGS" by clario.

You came back from your walk and Dina was already asleep so you couldn't talk to her. You really wanted to stay up but you knew you couldn't because you have work at 5:00AM. You eventually went to sleep.

✧༺✦✮✦༻ ༺✦✮✦༻✧

In the morning you had about 10 more minutes before you could clock out. You were doing cashier and serving because the cashier had went out sick.

You were at the cash register an you were looking for your note pad for serving. A customer walks in.

Welcome to 𝐿𝑢𝑐𝑘𝑦'𝑠 𝐶𝑎𝑓e how may I assist y-

Your words are cut off as you look up. It was Ellie.

Hey princess so I heard your a servant?

Very funny Ellie, what do you want?

That's no way to talk to a customer pretty girl.

Ellie hurry the fuck up I have to serve to.

Fine whatever you say m'lady, a matcha smoothie.

Whatever, what size?

Hm how tall are you again?

Wow love the jokes williams. Get her a small please.

What you doing tomorrow?

Nothing why?

Movie night tomorrow is Saturday

Oh shit right I forgot uh sure I'll go.

You didn't forget you just had a lot on your mind. You could see Ellie's cut on her forehead and her bandaged knuckles from that night. You hand Ellie her drink and she gives you that stupid smirk she always does before leaving the shop.

As soon as you get home you Immediately call Jesse because you guys were supposed to meet at a diner tonight. He said that you guys might have to go a little early because he has to set up movie night for tomorrow. You had classes in an hour so you had to hurry and change from your work clothes into baggie jeans with a regular black long sleeved shirt with your favorite shoes to go to class. After your class ended you had sat in the quad under a shady tree sketching while softly singing "Billie Bossa Nova". You didn't notice that you were sketching out a picture of Ellie untill you added the hair. You kept sketching her though because it was the only thing that was keeping you from getting anxious. Your phone had buzzed, it was a text from Jesse.

Jess 💕

Yo what diner you want to go to????

Idk you can pick I ate earlier so I'm probably gonna just get smth to drink

No you didn't ik your schedule kid you had work earlier and you never bring lunch to your job

Fuckin stalker

Fine I'll pick but you are eating ok miss I'm in love with Ellie Williams.

What?! I don't love her Jess she's a friend that I like as a F R I E N D.

Uh huh sure whatever loser I'll see u in a bit bye

Read 11:20PM

✧༺✦✮✦༻ ༺✦✮✦༻✧

As you walk back to your apartment all you can think about is Ellie. What is wrong with me? What is she doing to me? Those thoughts filled your head. Once you got home you opened the door and all there was in that room was smoke.

What the fuck? D you didn't fucking tell me Ellie was here?!

Oops sorry babe I forgot to tell you

Bullshit.

You wanted to go to a Billie eilish concert with somebody but you didn't know who because you had two tickets that arrived yesterday. You wanted to ask Dina but she was really busy. You couldn't ask Jesse because the day that you are going he is visiting his parents. Suddenly a new idea popped in your head. Dina had left to go get groceries.

Ellie

Yes m'lady?

Getting funnier. You wanna go to a concert with me?

I was gonna ask Dina but she's really busy around that time.

Thanks for being your first option.

Fuck you. Are you gonna go or no?

Uhm- y-yeah sure.

Alright it's on monday

I'll just go to your apartment when I'm ready.

Wait where is it?

In LA

Holy fuck in another state?!

Yup

Fine I gotta go though I'll see you tomorrow princess

Bye.

✧༺✦✮✦༻ ༺✦✮✦

It was the day before the concert and you had just gotten off of work. You were walking home as you noticed you left your keys at your job so you ran back and you bump into somebody.

Fuck-uh-shit I'm so sorry

No worries your just being the good girl you are right princess.

E-ellie?

What other person is being pinned on the floor right now I think just me kid.

You jumped up as you realized you were pinning Ellie on the floor. Your heart was racing, she looked so good that day.

Uh- sorry

It's fine so when are we leaving tomorrow?

What do you mean we are leaving today Ellie

Why?

So we can have somewhere to stay when the concert is over which is going to be very late and I don't want to get on a plane at one in the morning.

Wow-uh ok I'll get my stuff ready then.

As Ellie leaves you exhale in relief because of your thoughts. Why is she doing this to me? Oh no I have to be in a room with her. Why did she look so good? It was all you could think about untill you remembered what you came back for. You grabbed your keys and went back outside and saw some guy trying to beat up Ellie. You knew Ellie was a very good fighter but that means it wouldn't go well either way. You had grabbed Ellie's arm and pulled her into the passenger seat of her car and you grabbed her keys and started driving to your apartment.

What the actual fuck Ellie.

What? He was being a dick.

So? You didn't have to be a dick to.

Fuck you. You don't even know what happened.

Oh yeah?

...

Exactly so shut the fuck up.

You drive Ellie to your apartment sense Jesse's was down stairs you sat Ellie on your bed and got your first aid kit.

Hold this on your hand.

Wh-

Just fucking do it.

You didn't expect the next sentence out of Ellie's mouth which stunned you a bit.

So.. The other night when you forgot your jacket.

Can I ask you why you did it?

Uhm.. Yeah I uh-

if you don't wanna talk abt it you don't have to.

Yeah no I guess I should tell you. Uhm idk I just did it because I was unsatisfied with myself I guess.

Is that it?

No uhm... I did it because if people too but there's just a bunch of reasons why.

Oh I think your ok.

What?

I mean like I think that you'll eventually be ok.

Oh.. Thanks El.

El?

Oh- oh my god I- I'm sorry I didn't mean to call you that.

Do it again

I'm not calling you that ever again.

Cmon do it again

I said-

Your words were cut off by Ellie's lips pressing onto yours. You gasped while kissing her, you didn't pull back. Her lips were so soft pressed against yours, you didn't want her to leave anymore, it's like you were strangely addicted to her lips now. She was smiling while kissing you. You were pinned on your wall all of a sudden.

Shh shh I got you baby.

She whispered to you while kissing you. You enjoyed having Ellie with you. You enjoyed making out with Ellie, it was like nothing you've ever experienced. Ellie was different she was gentle but demanding. You loved it, you loved her.

✧༺✦✮✦༻ ∞༺✦✮✦༻✧

𝐴𝑢𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑟𝑠 𝑛𝑜𝑡𝑒𝑠:

𝐴𝑙𝑟 𝑔𝑢𝑦𝑠 𝑠𝑜𝑟𝑟𝑦 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑤𝑎𝑖𝑡 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑏𝑢𝑠𝑦 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑛𝑒𝑥𝑡 𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑏𝑒 𝑎 𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑡𝑙𝑒 𝑏𝑖𝑡 𝑜𝑓 𝐸𝑙𝑙𝑖𝑒'𝑠 𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑠𝑝𝑒𝑐𝑡𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑠𝑜 𝑏𝑒 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑦 𝑜𝑘 𝑤𝑒𝑙𝑙 𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑦 𝑡𝑢𝑛𝑒𝑑 𝐼 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑔𝑢𝑦𝑠 𝑏𝑦𝑒 💕

𝑃𝑠. 𝑆𝑜𝑟𝑟𝑦 𝑖𝑓 𝑖𝑡'𝑠 𝑎 𝑏𝑖𝑡 𝑠ℎ𝑜𝑟𝑡 𝐼 𝑟𝑎𝑛 𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑜𝑓 𝑖𝑑𝑒𝑎𝑠.

[sundropmoondroplover]

Protect The Starlight Sun/Moon x Reader Chapter 5

After the incident with the cable, you made sure to be more careful. Parents were starting to show up to pick up their sleeping children. Anytime a parent would show up, Moon would go and gently pick up the sleeping child, handing them their kid. The parents would say thank you to Moon before quietly walking off with their sleeping children. Soon, all the children were gone, and you were left alone with Moon. You looked at the time, noticing it was now 4 pm. You had just 2 hours left before you had to leave. Moon walked around cleaning up the Daycare. "Messy messy messy," he said quietly.

"Hey, Moon? Did you need help cleaning up?" You asked quietly. Moon stopped what he was doing, looking at you with his glowing red eyes. Moon said nothing for a few minutes before finally speaking. "Fine, but don't get in my way. You will be punished if you get in my way, " he said quietly. You nodded and then started helping Moon clean the Daycare. It was only another 10 minutes before Moon would turn back into Sun. You decided that you should try to interact with Moon despite what happened earlier. You let out a quiet sigh before getting Moon's attention. "Moon? I really want to try to be friends with you no matter how long it takes, " you said.

Moon looked over at you, letting out a quiet growl. "I don't want to be your friend... much too dangerous to be your friend, " Moon said, letting out a quiet chuckle. You heard Moon let out a quiet 'Shut up Sun.' "Wait... Can Sun hear and see everything you're doing, Moon?" you asked, smiling. "Yes, he can.. Which means if I hurt you right now, he won't be able to protect you nor stop me, " he said, smiling. You took a step back hearing Moon's deep chuckle once again. Moon walked closer to you, letting out a quiet growl. Right before Moon could lay a hand on you, the lights turned back on. During this, you cowered away from him expecting something to happen, yet nothing did. You heard the quiet whirr of machinery, the same as when Sun turned into Moon.

"Oh, Sunlight! I'm So So So sorry... Moon Hurt You. I Told Him To Stop But He Didn't," Sun said sadly. You looked up at Sun with a smile. "It's okay, Sun.. I'm fine, " you said sadly. Sun bent down in front of you, gently taking you into his embrace. You hugged Sun gently before telling him that you were fine. "Hey Sun, we need to keep cleaning up the Daycare," you said. Sun let go of you before going to clean. You let out a quiet sigh thinking about what could've happened if Sun didn't take over the time he did. One thing was going through your mind. Is Moon capable of seriously injuring someone? If he could, it would be extremely dangerous to guests or other people. "Hey, Sunny? Has Moon always been like that?" you asked. "No... Not Always. Something Happened In The Past. Moon Would Have To Tell You Himself," he said, walking over to you.

"Would Moon even trust me enough to tell me that story?" you asked. Sun smiled at you. "Of course, Y/n! You Just Got To Give Him Time," Sun said quickly. Is that all Moon needs, or is it something else? You smiled at Sun, thanking him quietly. You looked at the time, noticing it was now 5. You had to leave work in an hour. You might talk to Shawn after this to see if there was anything you could do for Moon. You wanted Moon to trust you and not have this constant thinking that he can't trust you. "Hey Sunny, I have to leave in an hour. Uh.. tell Moon I said goodbye and that I will be back tomorrow. I need to continue the stuff that I need to do," you said. "Of course, Y/n! I Will Tell Him," Sun said, smiling even more than before.

For the rest of your shift, you continued to clean the Daycare a bit, then sort out the boxes for the children's things for tomorrow. Once you were done sorting out the boxes, you looked at the time seeing it was now 6pm. "Sun, I need to go! Have a nice night!" you said loudly. "Bye-bye, Y/n I Will See You Tomorrow!" Sun said excitedly. You left the Daycare and walked to the employee locker room, grabbed your things, and clocked out. As soon as you were done doing that, you started heading up to where Shawn's office was. Letting out a quiet sigh, you walked into the office. "Ah, hello, Y/n. How was the first day?" Shawn asked typing on the computer. "Really exhausting but fun. Hey Shawn, I have a question for you, " you said, sitting down on a chair. Shawn made a little 'hm' while still typing on his computer.

"Has Moon always been aggressive to employees?" you asked quietly. Shawn immediately stopped typing on his computer, letting out a quiet sigh. "As to my knowledge, he has. We are not sure as to exactly why. We have tried resetting him a few times, and it never seems to work. I understand if you don't want to work in the Daycare anymore. Honestly, it's happened more than you think, " Shawn explained. You shook your head. "No, I'm not leaving. I was just curious. So, no one gave him a chance to get used to them?" you asked. Shawn shook his head, saying, 'No.' "Everyone was too scared that Moon would seriously hurt them. Moon is perfect with the children, but to the employees, he just changes, " Shawn explained.

"Well, lucky for you, I'm not like everyone else. I'm not giving up on trying to make Moon trust me. I will be back tomorrow, Shawn. Have a nice night, " you said, smiling before taking your leave. You were more determined than ever to get Moon to trust you. It might take a while to get Moon to trust you, but you were going to do it. Like you said to yourself before. No matter how long it takes. You will find the same kindness Sun has inside of Moon. You walked outside and got into your car before eventually driving home.

[nathank77]

6/19/24

8:50 a.m Edited/Added to

So of course last night was the first time I forgot to write down my closed eyes time, why? My timer went off for Mouthwash I was super tired and I was fighting my eyes and I was like yea right you won't fall asleep, you'll need to pee. I was like I'll close my eyes and in 5 or 10 minutes use Mouthwash. I believe my timer went off at 10:59 but Idk. I was out like a light. Dead to the world. I woke up at like 5:30 a.m. I tried to sleep until like 6:15 a.m and I couldn't fall back to sleep. I didn't want to use drugs bc I don't want to wake up at like 12 p.m or even 10 a.m. I want to wake up everyday at like 8 a.m the latest... In order to keep a strict circadian rhythm and fight circadian rhythm disorder you need to be strict about your sleep/wake cycle.

I probably got like 6 hours and 15 minutes of sleep. Still not a single 7 hour night but I'm getting closer. I think my circadian rhythm is adjusting.

Unfortunately tonight I need to go back to a half mg. Or at least try.. I'm going to take my half mg at 9:30... so I can take the other half by like 11 p.m or something after 1 hour of closing my eyes and presumably failing. We will see what happens. If I have to take the second half... at that point it'll be day 3 and by day 4 my tolerance will forever be raised.. so tomorrow I'll just take the full mg and accept it.

Today I started laundry. All my attic clothes from my old dresser will be complete and put in a bin. Stupidly bc I'm a hoarder i tried to go through it but can't make my mind up for various reasons.. so I decided to wash it all and decide later. Some of the basketball shorts are brand name but very small... I mean I have good reasons for being like idk. I'm also going to put tide cold wash directly on the arm pit stains and see if it comes off my second load... I mean some of the pit stains got removed from a general wash in it.. so maybe I can save all my nice shirts. I'm keeping them regardless bc I know I can try different things to lift the hard surface stains over time.

I emailed the board and asked if i could provide more documentation like my night at the psych ward and my primary care for documentation of my insomnia.

I put my graduation stuff in that corner. It isn't perfect but it looks better. I might move more posters around today.

I got to go grocery shopping and return my gloves. I'm also going to pick up my testosterone today. I'm going to do all of this before my t-shot at 3:45 p.m so I can come home and shower.

My sister has a tripod I'm waiting on so I can get my car photo shoot pictures. I might make some phone calls before I go to the grocery store.

I'm getting shit done. I really hope I don't have to raise my tolerance but we will see.

Also I detailed pooping problems on my sleep tracker. I started 2000mg of white mulberries 4 days before I had some problems and l salivarius 3 days before. It could be l salivarius. It could be a change in the way I eat which I'm fixing. Idk but we will first start changing my eating order and see if it fixes it, if it doesn't, then we will take out l salivarius if that doesn't work I'll take my white mulberries to 1500 again... and see if that works. Then try l salivarius again.

I have a feeling it's my sleep schedule with the eating habits being changed but we will see. As I had 4 days of the white mulberries and 3 days of l salivarius that everything was normal and then I didnt sleep...

My hallucination is making me want to die. It's whatever this is my quality of life.