#I don't want to be thin to look good I want to be thin to look like a scene kid with a drug problem

[nsharks]

bleeding blue | apocalypse au

part thirty —other parts

pairing: Simon “Ghost” Riley x fem!reader words: 3.8k tags: death. blood and gore. zombies of course. AFAB reader. single dad ghost. enemies to lovers. SA and implication of child SA (very subtle). summary: After losing your companions, you run into a skull-masked man and his daughter. They are your last hope for survival. a/n: this chapter is all from Blue's perspective. if anything regarding the abuse or suffering of children triggers you do not read. though it is really not graphic at all (imo) and the SA is EXTREMELY implied and subtle (just a woman looking/potentially touching Blue's private area to check for virginity). I wanted to tell you so there are no surprises.

B

Blue hasn’t been without her father for more than an hour in over five years. There were moments when she'd imagined him disappearing, especially when he said no to her, when he could annoy her, push her too hard, or withhold the words she craved. And yet—now, with her head resting in Twix's lap, she can only long for him. The thought of his absence fills her with cold dread. The kind that erupts goosebumps on her arms despite the stuffy air in the room. Twix’s fingers gently stroke the back of her scalp, but it does little to ground her as her mind drifts to Ghost. He’s alive, that woman said. But it's been over a day, and he still hasn’t come for her.

"Do you think he will come soon?" she asks quietly.

Twix's fingers pause at the top of her hairline. "I think... I think he is doing everything he can to find you."

Blue is old enough to know that is a non-answer.

She knows, deep down, that Twix doesn't think he'll be coming, either.

"I will figure something out, okay?" she promises.

"Okay," Blue whispers noncommittally.

"Hey." A faint smile. "I've done pretty good at getting us out of shit in the past, right?"

Blue mumbles, "I guess so."

But this time felt different from those times. No matter how many times she catches Twix squinting around the room, murmuring things to Nereida, even Blue knows that a bright idea won’t magically appear. Not in here, where there is nothing except the three beds, the bolted cell, and the out-of-reach door that Ghost has yet to barge through.

When Blue's fingers instinctively search for her wrist, Twix’s face softens, and she gently encloses her palm over Blue's knuckles. "Alright. I want you to close your eyes and imagine that beach you showed me once. The one with white sand, and super blue water." Blue plays along with a deep sigh, closing her eyes as she feels a callused thumb brush her cheek. "Almost as blue as your eyes. See it?"

"I guess."

"Good. Now, I want you to imagine that you are lying on the sand, eating all the Twix bars and Nutella you want. Oh, and Grim is there. He was trying to make a sandcastle but got his head stuck in the sand."

Blue's lips twitch despite herself. "This is dumb."

"Dumb? Well, I don't think Grim finds it dumb. He can hardly breathe right now so you better stop eating chocolate and haul his ass up."

Blue snorts quietly, eyes screwing tighter as she imagines it; pulling the bunny out of the sand, giggling, the waves crashing. She falls back onto the sand with him in tow, but he darts away from her hands, toward the water. When she looks over, sun glaring, someone else is there. It's her father, and for a moment she is ready to jump on his back and beg him to play in the waves with her. That's when she notices he is keeled over, ripped apart, bloodied and battered.

Blue jolts, inhaling sharply. When she reopens her eyes, the image is still there. 

"What's wrong?" 

"I just saw—" she rubs her eyes profusely, but he's right in front of her. Blood begins to spurt from a sever in his throat. His head snaps forward, hanging by a thin thread of tissue. "I see him! H-his head is..." 

She jerks upright from Twix's lap, her eyes blinking rapidly as if trying to shake off the vision. When that doesn't help, she buries her face in the pillow, but the image remains too real to ignore. The thread snaps, and her father’s head rolls away silently.

Twix’s voice cuts through, her hands gently shaking Blue’s shoulders, but it feels distant, like a shadow compared to the sickening thud of her father’s headless body hitting the ground. Thick blood pools at her feet, and she tries to move, but her muscles won’t obey. The blood rises and rises, suffocating her, until she can’t breathe.

"Blue, it's just... you're imagining it."

"I can't... I can't..."

Someone flips her over on the bed and hugs her shoulders.

Twix's chapped lips press into her cheek.

"Please, Blue. I'm here."

The touch is enough to drain the blood and free her lungs. Her father's dead body floats away. She gulps for air, cold sweat clinging to her neck, and curls into the body beside her. Lingering panic races through her heartbeat, but then, after a minute, it begins to slow considerably. A new feeling washes over with the force of a tidal wave; fatigue.

Blue suddenly feels so tired that she can't keep her eyes open. It’s as though the terrible images have drained her entirely, leaving only murky water in their place. Her mind begins to float, and the edges of the world blur. Twix's face is in front of her yet feels so far away. Her lips try to part for words to come out, but it takes three tries just to manage: "I feel strange."

Across the cell, Nereida whispers, "I do, too."

Weight shifts on the mattress as Twix tries to sit up, leaning against the wall. Her head dips slightly, then snaps back up. A shaky inhale. "That... that fucking bitch. The oatmeal!"

The oatmeal? Blue’s thoughts latch onto the warm meal they’d been forced to eat, but the memory slips away before she can hold onto it. The slow descent snowballs. Twix’s voice distorts, blending with the chirping of birds outside the window. Her body slides down the wall, crumpling back beside Blue. She tries to hug Twix again, but her arms won’t cooperate.

Minutes later, or maybe hours, Blue hears the metal screech of the cell door swinging open. Veiled ghosts drift in. She can do nothing to run from them. Murmured voices, speaking words she doesn't understand, bleed through the heavy blanket of fog lying over her.

"Vous avez dit que celui-ci était intact?"

"Oui, Maman."

"Nous offrirons son corps pur au Seigneur. Les deux autres seront aptes à avoir des enfants."

"Mais elle est une... Je veux dire, oui, Maman."

She feels something cold and sinuous lifting her—snakes. No, not snakes. Hands. Cold, unfamiliar hands. Twix shouts something slurred. Then Blue is dragged by her feet, her spine no longer supported by the bed. She tries to squirm free, but her limbs feel heavy, useless. More hands clamp down on her arms.

No, no.

She wants to call for Twix, but her voice is muffled beneath a palm, the sound dying in her throat.

A weathered voice coos in her ear. "Sweet child. There is nothing to fear."

She can't scream.

All she knows is Twix is no longer the one beside her.

Cold fear surges through her veins, and she claws at someone’s arm. The retaliation is swift—a prick to her neck.

The strike of pain intensifies her dizziness, the last fight in her body fading away. They're dragging her again. The hard floor beneath her feet melts into soft grass, and the stark white ceiling shifts into a blue, cloudless sky before everything fades to black.

A gentle melody repeats in her subconscious until she rouses.

The same three-note tune, over and over.

Peeling her eyes open against the buttery sunlight, the first thing she notices is an open window above her head, its thin white curtain dancing in the light breeze. Upon the windowsill sits a small, cooing bird with pearly grey feathers and a black ring around its neck. Its head tilts almost mechanically, two little black eyes regarding her. She stares for a long moment before her eyes fall closed once more, lulled by the familiar call. Only when the bird quiets does she truly come to her senses. The sudden silence jolts her upright.

This isn't the same room she was in before. There hadn’t been a window in the cell, and certainly not one left open. The air there had been thick with the scent of old wood and lingering dust. But here... here, the air is different. It smells of fresh flowers, of the tall grass she used to wade through with Ghost while hunting. 

The bird calls once more before flittering away, leaving her reeling.

"A collared dove."

Her gaze snaps to the right where an old woman sits in a mahogany chair, knitting needles in hand. Without looking up from the red yarn she weaves, she explains idly, "They are very common. Lovely, but common."

The accent of her old voice is nothing like Blue's Mancunian one. But she understands each word.

Her voice pulls through her teeth with great effort. "I don't... Where am I?"

The old woman's brow furrows as if she is deep in thought, but it smoothes over after she undoes a stitch and loops it again, hands moving with an unnatural slowness. "You had them in England, yes? They are very common there, too."

Blue's fingers spread into the fine linen, her pulse ticking as she blinks a few times to sharpen her vision. The woman before her is older than anyone she has seen in a long time, though there is a faint resemblance to a woman deep in her memory who she believes was her grandmother. Unlike the woman who visited their cell with food, this one does not wear a veil over her face. Long wisps of gray hair fall over her shoulders. Wrinkles etch around her eyes and lips. She is still cloaked in white, but around her neck hangs a red cord beaded with a cross dangling at the end.

Her fingers clench. "I don't care about the-the stupid bird. Why am I here? Where are my friends? You..." she swallows the feel of sandpaper in her mouth, "You put something in the food. You made me lose control of myself again!"

Finally, grey-blue eyes flicker up beneath a questioning brow. "Oh, sweet child. You are so full of fire." With an unsettling calmness, the woman sets down the knitting needles on a carved side table. Pressing a palm to the surface of it, she rises slowly, then laces her hands in front of her. "Come, and perhaps your questions will be answered. Though, I wouldn't try to run." She moves toward the door, her gait shuffled but steady. A glance over her shoulder beckons. "Your friends are under my care."

The mere mention stiffens Blue's spine. She forces herself to her unsteady feet, swaying slightly, bare toes digging into the wood planks. Each small step feels lighter than the first time she woke up from being drugged, though her body still protests. Ahead, the woman is already walking away. It wouldn’t take much to catch up, but Blue lingers, her eyes sweeping the room with deliberate caution—always stay aware of your surroundings.

For a moment, she considers grabbing the knitting needle and stabbing the woman. But then what? Everyone, her father included, is under her care, and any misstep could mean their deaths. Ghost always told her to never act without some type of plan—to wait for the right moment. Blue doesn’t even know where the others are.

As she hesitantly steps out of the small house, the realization hits her. There are more people here than she’s seen in a long time. Almost like a town, but not really. Smaller than that, but more than her group. The building they just left is a small, home made of light grey stone. To her right are more homes, smoke billowing from the chimneys. She counts at least four of them. Straight ahead of her is gravel road. This is where the woman heads, with Blue trailing behind her. To the left is a stretch of green lawn, bright and lush. She has the itch to sprint over it, but a voice ends that idea.

"Catch up, girl." 

Gravel bites her toes as she walks to the woman's side. She is still only dressed in the simple, white slip. She hasn't worn a dress before.

"Where are you taking me?"

"There are some things I wish you to see." 

"Why... why can't the friends I was with be here to see them, too?"

From the corner of her eyes, Blue catches the woman smile lightly. "What do you think of France?"

Blue digs her nails into her palms, swallowing down her frustration at the non-answer. "It's... nice, I guess." It isn't a lie. The beautiful beach they left from, the fields of wheat and flowers, were things she'd only imagined before. 

"Good. My husband was from India but owned this land. I never wanted to leave it. France is the most beautiful place. I knew I wanted my son to grow here." She exhales in a quiet appreciation. "My husband said this land would thrive, even after the plague. He was right. The Lord spared it. He did not spare Ashwin, though."

Blue doesn't know what to say to that. If she should feel sorry for this person or not. She didn't state her husband's death in a sorrowful way, merely factual. As they walk, they pass a few men hunched over tree stumps, chopping wood. The smell of fresh earth and spilt sap wafts up her nose. The men glance up, their gazes lingering on Blue a moment too long, making her shift uncomfortably. Then, they lower their heads respectfully toward the woman. She speaks to them in French, and their chuckles follow her words.

Under a warm afternoon, they approach what looks like a large barn, bordered by wooden fence posts strung with taut wires. Inside the fenced area, Blue notices a white horse, smaller than Cherry, along with four cows. More men are working nearby, some tending to the animals while others, farther off, wield sickles to harvest stalks of wheat.

When they stop in front of the fence, Blue can't stop herself from asking, "Where are all the girls at? Like the one who fed us? I've only seen guys so far."

The woman doesn't look at her. "Our community is built around the roles God intended for us. Men have bodies made for working under the sun. Women, like those beautiful young ladies you traveled with, are vessels to be cherished, protected. Especially in these times when they have become rather scarce."

A few of the words fail to make sense to Blue, never having learned them from any of the books Ghost read her. "Um, is that why you separated the girls in my group from the men?"

She hums, a slow sound. "Women are kept in their own quarters with the infants."

"Okay," Blue rocks on her feet and grips the hem of the dress before the light air can catch it. So is her dad one of those men working, then? She squints, confused, and shakes her head. No; if he was anywhere out here, he would've come to her. He must be locked up, too. A wave of anger buzzes in her chest, louder than the cicadas. "That still doesn't explain why you are holding Twix and Nereida prisoner. If women are so special, why are they locked up and I am out here? And where are all the men from my group?" Her mind briefly flashes to the others; Kyle, Price, and... Ari. 

"None of them are prisoners, child. They are merely being readied for the role their bodies were created for, by God."

Blue grits her teeth. "You're not really answering my questions. What about me? Why did you bring me to," she glances back at the working men, who haven't stopped to look at her like the others had, too engrossed in the strenuous labor. "A fucking farm. What could you possibly want to show me here?"

"There is someone I need here before our next stop." She leans closer to the barbed fence and calls out, "Pierre! J'ai besoin de toi et de trois hommes pour nous accompagner jusqu'à la cale. Apporte les chaînes."

A man—Pierre, she guesses—strikes one of the cattle's hindquarters, wipes sweat from the back of his neck, then shouts in French to three others following behind him. They unlatch a gate in the fence and slip inside a small shed for a brief moment, emerging with rusted chains in hand. They approach, causing Blue to falter and step back. An old, strange woman is one thing, but three strong men are another. A fissure of terror cracks through her, and she inhales shakily.

"You need not be afraid."

She blinks up at the woman, who for a moment, conjures something similar to a comforting expression. Blue nods, and then they are walking again, with the four men trailing behind them. The sound of the chains dangling in their grasp makes her feel uneasy. What are they for, and why are they coming with them? She is ready to build the bravery to ask when the woman ghosts a hand on her shoulder.

"What is your name, child?"

"It's... um, Blue."

A soft chuckle. "The English and their strangeness. This is not your real name, is it?"

For some reason, Blue finds the truth stuttering out of her. "No, it's—the name I was born with is Amelia."

"Amelia. Much better. Tell me, Amelia, did your mother have blue eyes?"

Blue nearly chokes, her footsteps halting in the grass as she flinches away from her hand, curling her fingers into fists. "What the fu—why are you asking me that?"

The woman stops beside her and clasps her hands together, the long sleeves of her gown falling over them. She is a small woman, hardly taller than Blue, and can't be any stronger than she is, but something about her emits control. Blue can't look away from her eyes, even as her jaw tightens, stomach swirling.

"There are many answers to questions that can be discovered on their own if one simply looks for them. I know which one of them is your father—"

"How could you know?" Blue demands. "I haven't even said any of them was my dad."

Thin lips twitch at the side. "A daughter gets the shape of her face from her father." A bony finger reaches to trail the edge of Blue's cheek, and she trembles from the cold feel of it. "But the features are all from her mother." She looks away and continues walking, speaking over her shoulder, "A little dove might have also told me he was asking for you."

When the men step forward, Blue is forced to continue walking. It feels hard to breathe, even though the canopy of trees offer fresh, rich air. "Then why are you asking about my mother?"

"Your eyes are blue, but your father's are not. I was simply curious."

"My mother is dead," Blue finds herself gritting out. 

"I figured. Neither of those women were her, and many mothers have been lost. A very terrible thing. A child needs its mother. You will call me Maman, Amelia. This is what French children call their mothers."

"I am not going to fucking call you that. Tell me where we are going," Blue presses, swallowing as she looks back at the farm behind them. Through the gaps between the men's shoulders, she sees that it is rather distant now, along with the small homes. She looks back ahead; nothing but overgrown vegetation. Even the flowers have grown sparse over here. It is quiet and still. She can hear the thrum of her own heart.

"Your fire is admirable, but you need to learn respect." For the first time, Maman's voice carries an edge, one that sends a shiver down Blue's spine. A foreign bird call echoes through the leaves, and the woman holds up a hand, signaling for everyone to stop and listen. "Ah. That’s the Bluethroat, if I’m not mistaken. Much rarer than the dove. You won't often find those in England."

The bird calls again—a trilled chirp—as they crest over a small hill, and the air suddenly grows heavier, more pungent. A smell Blue knows well makes her freeze, but a strong grip on her arm keeps her moving toward the source of the stench: an old, smaller building made of much darker stone. The sharp rustle of wings through the trees fades into the distance, but the tension in her body doesn’t ease.

"You, too, are rare, Amelia," Maman continues, voice steady and unhurried. "A pure, young female like you—so virtuous—carries more favor from God than any other. Your friends have their purpose, and you have yours. Each of us plays a part in shaping the new vision of God's children."

The men move in front of them now, except for one who continues gripping Blue. The tremble in her body intensifies, and a cold pit grows unbearable in her chest, thundering. She is forced to stand about four meters in front of the large door, where one man grips the handle while two others, including Pierre, stand beside it, their hands ready with chains and their stances wide. It’s now, through the stinging film that grows over her eyes, that Blue notices large metal muzzles attached to the chains.

Blue is too stunned—too confused, yet frightfully aware—to move a muscle when Maman procures a knife from inside her robe. Pierre shouts something in French, but Blue can barely hear him. Her senses are fixed on the bead of sunlight glinting off the knife, and on the scratching and snarling she hears from the other side of the door.

"Please—" she gasps, unable to finish the thought.

Maman ignores her in favor of snatching hold of her wrist. Cold fingers force her arm to extend, and a burning pain cries out when the knife slashes a laceration from her elbow to the rim of her palm. 

"Une seule coupure pour les attirer."

The blood weeps, and the door shakes from the ignited frenzy behind it.

Tears finally escape Blue’s eyes just before the door opens. She feels it—the sensation of her body being torn apart beneath rotten teeth. She squeezes her eyes shut, thinking of Ghost, when she hears more shouting and the harsh sound of chains being whipped through the air. When she opens her eyes again, the men are wrestling two Greys into the muzzles.

"Deux c'est bien!" Maman orders, and the door is slammed shut over the others that threaten to spill out toward the fresh wound. 

Blue is alive.

Her arm numb and bleeding. 

Maman yanks something else from her robe—a strip of cloth. She wraps it roughly around Blue's forearm, then issues another command. Without warning, Blue is hoisted from the ground and callously tossed over the shoulder of the man who had held her in place. They start heading back the way they came, the leashed Greys trailing behind them, and finally, a scream rips from Blue’s throat.

"You said this one was intact?" "Yes, Maman." "We will offer her pure body to the Lord. The other two will be fit to have children." "But she is a… I mean, yes, Maman." "Pierre! I need you and three men to accompany us to the hold. Bring the chains." "One cut to attract them.” “Two is good!”

[dollracha]

𐙚 i want it ⋆ h.js x fem! reader pt. 2

part one ⋆ part two

pairing: han jisung x inexperienced! reader genre: smut, smau warnings: swearing ⋆ spit kink⋆ virginity ⋆ needy han ⋆ slight perv!han ⋆ reader is called “baby” and “pretty girl” ⋆ no use of “y/n” ⋆ reader is referred to by she/her pronouns ⋆ piv ⋆ munch jisung ⋆ oral sex (fem recieving) ⋆ fingering ⋆ light cum play ⋆ lots of praise ⋆ dialogue heavy wc: 3.2k synopsis: a week after jisung eats you out, he takes your virginity at your eager request. author's note: i feel like this is a safe enough space to say that i kinda didn’t wanna write this pt 2. i struggled a lot, but it’s finally finished!! didn’t wanna leave you guys hanging so i pushed through and delivered! if you like it feel free to reblog or comment bc those make my day <3

© dollracha do not copy reupload or repost.

a pit of guilt grows in jisung’s gut. he promised you months ago that he’d take it slow. he broke that promise the moment it got too difficult to keep his dick in his pants. months ago, you would barely make out with him. you were so shy when it came to being intimate. but slowly, you got more used to it. slowly. 

he promised you that your first time together would be at the right moment. and he begged to get your pussy in his mouth before you were ready. he was such an awful boyfriend.

at least, that’s what he thought. 

jisung was oblivious to the lust that clouded your mind the following days. the way you’d wake up in the morning, only to feel slick between your thighs from the wet dreams the night before. the way you’d be going about your day, and suddenly the image of your boyfriend rubbing his dick on your pussy flashes in your mind. or the way you fantasize at night about how it’d feel to experience it all over again–his tongue, his fingers. how you'd fall asleep to the thought of his cock inside you.

he started a fire inside you without even knowing, and he needed to quell it before you lost your mind.

he’s barely even went further than kissing you since he ate you out. you know that jisung is scared to force you. but you also know that you’re ready. 

instead of asking him to fuck you, like any rational person would do, you decide the best way to what you want is to seduce him into it. it isn’t hard. really, it’s stupid easy. even a virgin can do it. 

⋆ ⋆ ⋆

when jisung gets into your apartment, all he wants to do is cuddle you while you stroke his hair. it’s one of the tamer things he’s been dreaming of all day. 

“baby?” he says, and shuts your apartment door. it’s silent. “baby?”

“bedroom.” is all you reply. when he opens the door, he pauses. he definitely had something to say with the way his mouth hangs open, but as soon as he sees you it’s thrown out the window. you see his adams apple bob as he swallows, and takes in the sight of you: naked except for a thin, cropped camisole and panties, your sweatshirt barely covering your arms before it falls to the floor.

“jisung.” you try your best to keep the amusement out of your voice. 

“shit! sorry, baby.” he snaps out of it quickly, adverting his gaze to the wall behind you. half of his thoughts for the past week come back to him all at once. seeing you barely covered makes the blood rush to his face, and his dick. it’s an instant reminder of how he had you just a week ago. he doesn’t look back to you, he might be strong enough mentally, but his dick sure isn’t. traitor.

“how was your day?” you're so casual about it, sauntering up to him and hugging him like you're not practically naked in front of him. like your tits don't press up against his chest when you hug him tightly.

“good. it was good. i missed you.” he's trying to stay calm. keep his dick from flying out of his pants like some deranged, horny adolescent who just discovered porn.

“yeah? still wanna cuddle like you wanted to earlier?” you ask, referencing a text he sent you a few hours ago.

screw his dick, his heart needed you more.

jisung sits on your bed, his back resting against the headboard. he watches as you climb into his lap, bare thighs against his sweats. you're so warm, and you smell so good… you're gonna kill him one day.

the moment your hands are in his hair, he's taking a deep, grounding breath. he loves when you play with his hair, it's the perfect stress relief for him. his girl, all pretty in his lap, running her fingers through his hair. dream come fucking true.

jisung can't help the low groan that escapes his lips as he adjusts his position. his arms wrap around you, shifting you in his lap so you're not sitting on his dick.

“fuck, baby.” he mutters. his eyes are shut, teeth biting at his lip to keep himself quiet.

it's cute, really. how worked up your boyfriend gets over you. you can't help but kiss the corner of his mouth, your hands cupping his cheeks as you try to push things further.

“kiss me, jisung?” the way you ask him is so sweet, so innocent sounding. like you don’t have a plan (you do) and all the pieces aren’t falling into place (they are). he can't resist, leaning up to kiss you short, sweet, and chaste. 

it's not enough. you take charge, kissing him and shifting in his lap to get a better angle. he gets the message, and lets you lead the kiss. in no time you're deepening it, your tongue in his mouth, and jisung's quick to pull back, your unusual boldness finally catching him off guard. 

“you good, baby?”

“mhm.”

“really?”

“you haven't kissed me in forever.” you're quick to defend yourself with a pout. forever, a week… same thing.

“c'mon, baby. you know i don't wanna rush you… i wanna take it slow with you, you asked me that and i'm doing my best…” he's looking at you like you’re too good for him, or he’s too bad for you. “you really don't know how hard that is for me, sometimes.” he mutters, eyes averting away from you. his hands come to rest on your hips, and it illustrates his point: he can't keep his hands off you.

“you're so gorgeous… prettiest girl i’ve ever seen. and you've got no idea how badly i just wanna push you down on the bed and fuck you sometimes.” jisung takes his hands off you, like they'll betray him. his hands ball up into fists at his sides. “you deserve someone who's able to wait for you, patiently.”

you don't like the implication of jisung's words. that you might ‘deserve’ someone better than him. your hands reach for his wrists, and guide his hands back to your body where they currently belong.

“i don't want anyone else, jisung, only you. it felt good when you ate me out. i liked it. i want more.” you cup his cheeks, forcing him to look at you. “fuck me. please?” you ask, thumbing over his cheeks. your eyes are so warm, so full of love for your just slightly perverted boyfriend.

“i don't wanna make you wait anymore. i'm ready now. please? i want it.”

jisung can't resist you: his dick is throbbing in his sweats, his mind clouded because you look so damn good on his lap. you're begging him to take your virginity. you’re clearing up the doubt and guilt in his mind. who is he to deny you any further? 

“i love you.” he grins, shaking his head. his hands travel up from your hips to your waist, and he presses a quick kiss to your cheek. “lie down, baby. let me take care of you.”

you’re quick to push yourself off his lap, and lie down beside his sitting form. there’s an air of excitement bouncing between you two as he kneels between your legs. he sits back to admire you beneath him. 

the way your hair lies behind you, the eager look in your eyes, the gloss of your lips from the messy kiss you shared. the way your top scrunches up beneath your tits, the strap barely falling off your shoulder. It’s the little nuances of your appearance that have him feeling like the wind’s been knocked from his lungs, and he wants to commit that beauty to memory, write about it like he’ll ever find the right words to describe you.

debauched. hot. perfect. ‘mine’. 

he can’t control himself, hands wandering your body to brush up your thighs. they reach your ribs and begin pushing up your top, freeing your tits for him to grope and tease. he takes in the way your breath catches, notes the things he does what makes you react. you’re so reactive and all he’s done is feel you up.

“shh… baby, i know…” he whispers as he takes your nipple between his thumb and index finger to give it a rough pinch. “want it so bad, right? want me to just put it in?” 

you nod. he’s worked you up quickly. “not yet. my girl deserves a special first time. i can’t just put it in. what kind of boyfriend would i be?”

“but, ji–” jisung’s hands trailing down your ribcage to your hips. his thumbs soothe over the skin, but his grip is firm, and keeps you in your place. 

“don’t be a brat.” the sudden sternness in his voice has you shutting up immediately. you don’t think he’s ever spoken to you with such strictness… it turns you on. with that, he stands, and pulls you to the edge of the bed. 

“let me take care of you.” his voice is softer as he speaks and drops to his knees on the floor. he ends all your thoughts of impatience the moment he begins kissing up your inner thighs. “gotta prep my girl first, okay?”

there’s a gentleness in his touch, as he spreads your thighs a little wider, taking in the sight of you. as if he didn’t make you cum on his tongue with no regards for your virgin status just a week ago. “relax f’me.”

he spreads your pussy open with two fingers, and in seconds there’s a slow, wet trail of his spit dripping down your clit. jisung starts with slow, gentle licks that have you melting into his touch. he works up a fire inside you that spreads with every deep shallow breath, every barely audible whine from your lips. when your wetness and his saliva are all glistening across his chin, he pulls away. “how’s it feel, pretty girl?”

“good.” you breathe out, and suck in a deep breath. “want more.” you roll your hips, desperate to get his mouth back on you. 

"yeah? more what?” jisung rubs your thighs, giving you a break whether you like it or not. it’s a form of self control for himself as well, he can’t get lost in eating you out if he stops. “what do you want more of, baby? tell me.”

honestly, you don’t know. you just want more of the feeling he’s giving you, the fire that builds slowly and threatens to take your breath away. luckily, jisung is more than happy to give you options. “want more of my mouth? or do you want to try my fingers?”

“just wanna feel good.” you decide, and jisung smiles. you’re cute, and you trust him with to make you feel good, even if you don’t know what you want. he’s eager now, your plea spurring him on. jisung teases his finger at your entrance, and slowly inserts it as he begins to suck on your clit. it’s not enough, not for jisung. as soon as he feels you relaxing around one finger, he’s quick to insert anther. it’s not a hard stretch. not when your pussy’s being so greedy, sucking in his fingers as he sucks on your clit. 

all the while you’re moaning his name so sweetly, rutting your hips up into his mouth like he’s just a pillow for you to hump. “fuck, baby…” he’s moaning into your pussy, reaching his arms beneath your thighs to pull you closer.

“ji…” the way you moan his name is obscene. he wants to hear it again.

“cum on my tongue.” it’s somewhere between a command and a plea. however he asks, he needs to see it again, feel it again–fuck, he needs to taste it again. “cum on my tongue and you can have my dick, baby. ‘s all yours.” 

it’s not lost on him that you’re close when your hands reach for his hair, tugging in a way that makes his eyes roll to the back of his head. he knows before you do, and he’s doing all he can to make you tip over the edge. 

“please–” 

the fire he coaxes within you builds and builds. until you’re warm to the touch and can’t speak anything but his name in broken moans. he holds you down when you cum, your hips fighting against his strength as his fingers fuck you through it.

“good girl��� that’s my good girl…” he praises. his eyes are glued to your face, taking in every frame of you as you come undone on his fingers. once your breathing calms, and you lie still on the bed, his eyes trail down to your pussy. his fingers gather the wetness of your cunt and pull out in tandem with your whine of “too much!”

“look at you, baby…” he coos as he stands. “that’s my good girl, cumming on my tongue so pretty for me.” his clean hand trails up your body, and rests against your throat. his hand is warm, almost weightless as it rests above your throat. it’s oddly grounding for you.

“made such a mess, though…” an idea pops into his head.  “you ever taste yourself, baby?” you shake your head no. jisung brings two fingers up to your lips. “go ahead.” he brushes the slick pads of his fingers against your bottom lip.

“clean up the mess you made.”

jisung groans as you take his fingers into your mouth. He can’t recall seeing a sweeter sight in his life. the way you look up at him, eyes wide and glossy as his fingers hit the back of your throat. you don’t stop though. you keep sucking, even beginning to bob your head a little and it goes straight to his dick.

he’s enjoying this too much.

jisung slides his fingers out of your mouth, and runs the same hand through his hair. “feel good?” he takes note of the look on your face, so fucked out already. you nod. it’s not a good enough response for him. “talk to me.” he’s gentle as he speaks, and brushes your hair out of your face. 

“feels good, ji.” you sigh, and shut your eyes. 

“yeah?”

“yeah.”

“want more? or are you done for the night?” jisung’s thumb caresses your cheek, the other hand sits softly at your waist.

“more, please?” 

“of course, baby. you did so good for me. i promised you i’d give you my cock, didn’t i? gotta give my pretty girl what she wants.” it makes him impatient, to know that he has you prepped and eager for him. but he has to start slowly. 

he pushes his sweats down beneath his thighs, too impatient to fully take them off. he fists his heavy cock in his hands as the tip prods at your entrance. 

“gonna put it in now, okay?” he doesn't give you much time to think about it and before you can reply, he's pushing in. 

“jisung…” your eyes shut as you moan his name, and jisung watches the way your pussy welcomes him. you watch jisung: the hungry look in his eyes, the messiness of his hair, the way he breathes deep and slow as he takes you. half his cock is nestled inside you when he finally breaks the silence.

“you're doing so good, baby…” he mutters, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “taking me so well…” 

it's then that he starts to thrust. calculated and slow strokes that have you gasping as clenching around him. jisung is captivated. his eyes are glued onto the way you suck him in. he's barely able to keep himself from fucking into you deeper. 

your eyes wander down from taking in jisung's expressions, to the way his hips fuck into you with all the restraint he has. it makes you want more, want to feel him completely.

“more,” it's not an ask or a plea. it's a demand. you keen into his touch, and your eyes lock. “i want it all.” 

jisung laughs. he can't help it, you're cute. “more, baby? you want all my cock?” he teases and slowly begins to pull out.

“yes!” you whine, “jisung, please?”

it's cute. you're so desperate for him. it's hypocritical almost. he's using all his self control trying not to fuck you like he's a fucking rabbit in heat.

without any warning, he's grabbing your hips and pulling you closer. he slides into you, slowly. he groans as he bottoms out. you reach out to grip the sheets, but he's quick to grasp your hand instead.

“good job, baby. fuck, pussy's made for me–hold my hand, pretty girl…”

jisung pulls back and he swears he sees stars. “fuck…” he doesn't know how much longer he can control himself. his thrusts are deep and slow, falling into the familiar routine he fucked you with earlier. 

it's not enough for you. not enough pleasure to satiate the fire hes stoking inside of you. “more.” you demand. “more, ji.” something snaps in him. he’s quick to fulfill your request, fucking into you faster. 

“so dirty, baby. never been fucked before and already can’t get enough.” you can’t deny his words, or respond. all you do is moan his name again and arch into his touch.

“close?” you mutter, almost unsure of when your own orgasm is coming. with that, jisung spreads your pussy open with his fingers, and spits right on your clit. the high pitched whine that leaves your lips makes him smirk. 

“i know, baby.” his fingers work fast circles against your clit, and he feels the way you tense and squirm against his touch. “too much!” and it’s not. jisung knows it’s not. it’s just enough.

 “cum for me, baby.” and you do: with little whines and moans of his name, with little rolls of your hips to chase the pleasure he’s giving you. you’re clenching around him like a vice, each flutter of your pussy brings him closer to cumming, and he’s already trying his best to hold off.

he can’t take it anymore. jisung pulls out quickly and fists himself as he cums on your tummy. “that’s my girl… did so well.” he praises, his free hand soothing over your hip. 

jisung watches as you come down from your high. you're so pretty. his pretty girl. all ruined. your hair's a mess. the thin sheen of sweat on your forehead. his cum all over your tummy.

“how are you feeling, baby?” he asks with a soft smile on his face. 

“good,” you nod, a barely there smile on your face as you reach for his hand. “more than good.” 

you tug his hand, trying to pull him down to cuddle you. it's a signal that jisung responds to immediately. he's pulling you to the side to spoon you. 

one hand rests against your tummy, and he rests your head against his other arm. he kisses your nape, then your shoulder, then rests his head against you. it’s peaceful. 

“i love you, jisung.”

“i love you, baby.”

© dollracha do not copy reupload or repost.

[uniasus]

Jason: if i wanted to buy bugs, where is the best place?

Damian: explain yourself

Jason: for pet lizards

Damian: you've gotten yourself a pet? I demand photos

Jason: no pet. Just doing some research. So, best bug grub?

Data in hand, Jason buys himself a cricket sampler. They arrive, loud and active in a thin, clear cylinder. He stares at them.

He's bumped into Danny a few times, there's a draw there he doesn't understand but he knows it's not Tim's messed up crush. But it's a different type of messed up attraction because every time Jason sees Danny eat a bug, he watches avidly and wants one too.

He refuses to tell anyone though, and his culinary experiments will be private. People across the world eat bugs a lot. Crickets can be turned into a protein packed flour. Eating bugs isn't that weird!

He can't bring himself to pry off the lid. These bugs aren't attractive at all. They're annoying and hoppy and make Jason's stomach churn. But he's seen Danny pluck a katydid from the air and bite it's head off, activating Jason's taste buds. Why are these smaller bugs not inspiring the same desire?

He sighs, if he's not gonna eat them, best send it to someone who will.

Jason scoops up the container and heads down to the lobby. He's surprised to see Danny there, but he's a well rated Gofer on GothamGets, and delivering random things to random places is literally his job.

Maybe that's why he eat bugs - protein he doesn't want to pay for. Jason should nudge Tim into asking Danny out for burgers.

"Hey."

"Hey, Jay. Are those crickets?"

Jason holds them up. Danny's eyes roam over the dozen hoppers and Jason half expects him to lick his lips or ask for a snack. But he doesn't, just smiles. Jason is disappointed enough to man up. Not like a Crime Alley apartment lobby has cameras Babs can look through.

"I... watching you eat a bug made me want to try. You make them look tasty."

"Bug? I don't..." Danny trails off, attention on a piece of dust floating between them. There's an odd sheen to it, and Jason finds himself tracking it too. It lands on the cricket container, then disappears.

"Oh," Danny sounds mortified as he stares at the cricket. "I've just been reaching, not really paying attention to what they were in but... you've been watching me eat them? And you want to try?"

He peers into Jason's eyes, and that same weird attraction passes through him. It's like spotting someone wearing the same obscure shirt and acknowledging good taste. A squish.

Jason's mouth is oddly dry. "Thought about it, yeah. But then i got these and they didn't look appetizing. There's a kid across the alley with a lizard-"

"None of them look tasty? You sure?"

Jason raises an eyebrow before looking down through the clear lid. "Yup, they just..."

Okay. One did all of a sudden look delicious. His stomach rumbles.

"Right," Danny drawls. "I haven't accepted a new pick up and you have time I'm guessing. Let's go to yours and I'll give you a much overdue nutrition lesson."

Danny snacks on blob ghosts. This becomes an issue to everyone around him.

Blob ghosts will often crowd around Danny in Amity Park, soaking in his ambient ectoplasm. Danny sees them as a free snack. They're usually invisible anyways, so who cares?

Well, here in Gotham, something's a little different. Maybe it's the evil, corrupted ectoplasm around there, or maybe everyone is just built different. Either way, the blob ghosts will inhabit the bodies of living things for play or just a free ride around. They'll clown car themselves in living beings too simple to push them out, like bees or flies.

As mentioned before, Danny likes to eat these blob ghosts. Which, in Gotham, are commonly inside bugs. You can see the issue.

Danny is just monch cronching on these blob ghosts, unaware everyone is staring at him like, this guy is either the most unsocialized person on the planet or not a human, because humans do not Do That.

[sirxlla]

Sorry - Halsey (Batboys)

------------------------------------------------

Dick: "and never really understood, the way you laid your eyes on me in ways that no one ever could."

To everyone, Dick was always put together. He was a rock, never broken, never sad or angry, just perfect. It was so far from the truth. He felt lonely, angry, and depressed.

This time of year was so taxing on Dick, he had started having nightmares about his parents and that night of the fall. Usually, this time of year, he breezed through it without so many nightmares, but this year was hell. He saw the fall over and over, and his blame for himself came back with a vengeance.

"No. No! No- No- Nononon! No!" Dick woke up with a start, sweat pooled in every crevice having dampened his shirt and pillow. Of course, he woke you up as well, and you went into comfort mode, rubbing his back.

"Hey...I'm right here if you need anything." You said with a soft whispering tone so as not to spike his heart rate more than it already was.

"What if it's my fault? What if it all is? What if everyone's gonna get hurt because of me?" Dick placed his head on your chest and started sobbing as you rubbed circles onto his back.

"Honey, as long as I've known you, I've known that as long as you draw breath, you'll help as many as you can...You'd give someone the shirt off your back and the shoes you were wearing just because they asked. You're an amazing person, and the world is so much better because you're in it. I don't want you to think any differently about it." You rubbed his back as his tears made the silk of your pajama shirt stick to your chest.

"I'm sorry." He wiped his eyes and sniffled. "I shouldn't be crying, everyone sees me like-"

"Hey, I don't give a shit how everyone sees you, and I would never think less of you 'cause you're brave enough to show me how you're feeling. Okay?" You look into those cerulean eyes shining in the dim light of the room.

"I am so proud of you and no one here would ever be disappointed in you, Honey." You hug him as he nuzzles into your chest and calms down a bit until he falls asleep, you rub his back until you fall asleep with him. His drool is now the only thing dampening your sleep shirt.

Jason: "I've missed your calls for months, it seems, I don't realize how mean I can be."

You had been calling him over and over, and he would read it; you could see he did. He was just ignoring it. He had disappeared into what felt like thin air. Had you done something wrong or was he in one of those moods of his where he thinks he's not good enough for anyone?

He's sitting alone in some hotel room in Central City. Jason left everyone alone; he needed some time to sort himself out. He knew that rule about how you have to love yourself to love anyone else, and right now, he couldn't stand the sight of himself. You didn't deserve his bullshit, you didn't deserve his demons that are drowning him alive.

You have sent his messages daily since he disappeared into the blue.

7:36 A.M. Jan 14th - "Everyone loves you." ~Read by JT❤️‍🔥

3:59 P.M. Jan 16th - "I miss you bunches." ~Read by JT❤️‍🔥

2:12 A.M. Jan 17th - "Just stay safe for me? I'd be in pieces if anything happened to you." ~Read by JT❤️‍🔥

8:36 A.M. Jan 19th - "Sorry forgot to text yesterday, I've been so tired, but I still miss you every moment you aren't here." ~Read by JT❤️‍🔥

5:26 P.M. Jan 20th - "Dinners always ready for whenever you come home. I promise." ~Read by JT❤️‍🔥

1:41 A.M. Jan 22nd - "Tokyo misses you, he meows by the door constantly. Please come home, our family misses you." ~Read by JT❤️‍🔥

10:38 A.M. Jan 23rd - "Jase, please. I can't sleep well without you. I don't know what's going on; please explain." ~Read by JT❤️‍🔥

11:37 P.M. Jan 24th - "Jase, Please come home. I'm sorry for whatever I did." ~Read by JT❤️‍🔥

He read the texts. What you did? You did nothing. He realized how stupid and selfish he was being, such an asshole. His fingers typed before he could fully decide what he wanted to do.

"What did you do? Babygirl, you did nothing wrong. I'm coming home, I'm sorry I've just been so stupid about everything recently. I've been worried I'm not enough but I realize I can spend forever getting closer to my idea of perfect for you until you kick me out or my heart stops beating. I'm sorry and I'll be home soon."

You had cried yourself to sleep that night, and you were so exhausted you hadn't seen the text. Tokyo started meowing, and it woke you; you checked the clock, and it was 3:53. You had only been asleep for a few hours.

"Tokyo, go to bed. He's not here." You cry into your pillow, your face is swollen, and your eyes still red from crying earlier.

"I am, Babygirl. I'm so sorry." Jason saw your face and how sad you were; his heart felt heavy in his chest, and he was angry at himself for hurting you so deeply. You didn't know what to do, so you stared at him as he crawled over to you and hugged you. It had been a hard week without him and him hugging you is what finally broke you. You sobbed into his chest, holding onto him tightly.

"Don't you ever do that again, You Asshole!" You sobbed angrily, hugging him tightly as you breathed in the smell of smoke that lingered on his skin.

"I promise, I never will. God, I'm so sorry. I'll spend forever apologizing for this. I'm so fuckin sorry." Jason heard the sadness in your voice and held you tighter til you both fell asleep.

Bruce: "Sorry I could be so blind, Didn't mean to leave you and all of the things that we had behind."

Being Batman and trying to be a billionaire on top of it just really didn't give him the time to be in a relationship. You knew this, and you tried your hardest to make sure that he never felt bad about it, but it doesn't mean that it didn't feel like shit every single time you wanted to do something with him or you had something planned and he had to change it.

Not only does this include dates and evenings and dinner but it was also sometimes that he was just so exhausted he would fall asleep in the middle of whatever you had planned anyways, it sucks.

You love him so deeply, but he's so busy all the time, and you're trying to give it the benefit of the doubt and just hope that, at some point, you'll come first to a degree. You held out for so long, but after a while, you just couldn't do it; you left.

Alfred noticed the note on the counter; if it had been Bruce, he wouldn't have noticed it for weeks.

"Master Wayne, I believe this is for you." Alfred hands the note to Bruce as Bruce is just about to go back out as Batman.

"Dear Bruce, My Love,

This has to be one of the hardest decisions I've ever made but I know it's the only option that I have where I don't feel guilty for taking up your time."

He started reading and then noticed the marks where tears had damped the paper as he continued to read.

"I would never ask you to put me over the people in Gotham. I know why you do what you do,, but it doesn't make it any less hard when I barely see you, and then when I do, you're covered in bruises, and you can barely get out of bed. I can't do this anymore. I love you, and it pains me so much to do this. I can't live a life where I feel so alone; it feels like I'm dating a ghost. I know that in my heart of hearts, I cannot handle this, and I know a child definitely can't. I'm pregnant and I'd rather do this alone than make you feel guilty for not being there or make myself feel guilty for staying. I love you, and I don't want to try to change you; I know what you do, what you do. I'm sorry, My Love.

Sincerely & Yours Always"

He finished reading the letter, and his heart dropped. You were pregnant? When? When did that happen? He should have known.

"I want you to see about Mr. Fox taking over my role in Wayne Enterprises. I'll still own the company the same, but I'll have more time." He asks Alfred; Bruce knows that this is something he should have done a long time ago. He's been missing you anyway, but now he is about to miss out on you for the rest of his life, and he is about to miss out on his kid.

Not even a few days pass before Bruce finds you, he's drenched in rain in civilian clothes. The rain just enhances the smell of his cologne. He looks even more tired than he usually does. It's clear he hasn't slept.

"I will do anything you ask just please don't leave me." He asks you as you open your door and in his hands held your favorite flowers. Bruce's eyes glanced down at your belly as you pulled him in to get him out of the rain, you were showing. He cursed himself in his mind. How could he even have remotely not noticed, considering how far along you are?

You grabbed towels from your hotel bathroom and began to dry him off.

"I let Lucius take over my job at Wayne Enterprises, so I'll have more time for you,, and I promise I will have more time for you, and I'll have more time for a little one. God, can't believe I didn't notice all the signs were there. How's everything been going?" He asks as his hands hover over your belly, asking for silent permission, which you allow when your hands guide him to your tiny bump.

"It's been okay; sleeping's been a bit rough, this mattress is like concrete, and the morning sickness is a bitch, but overall, I'm okay." You told him as his hands moved themselves under your shirt to feel his hands closer to the growing baby.

"Are you planning on coming home? I- I know we usually sleep during most of the day but I- I really wanna be here through this." You could hear the vulnerability and his voice something that rarely ever slipped to that degree.

"I- Yeah... I really didn't want to do this alone either just left because I didn't want you to feel bad."

"Sweetheart, I will never make you feel like you have to do anything alone again if I can help it." His hands still gently rubbing your belly.

"Well, we're definitely not going to make it home tonight, not in this rain, and I still have the room for the night."

He nodded, and the both of you laid down to watch whatever was on TV; it had been a long time since he had felt anything this domestic or 'normal.' It was so nice and calming, something he now had time for so much more with you.

Tim: "But I still know your birthday and your mother's favorite song."

Breaking up was never something either of you wanted to do, but you wanted to go to school in the U.K. that has always been a dream of yours ever since you were a kid, and Tim would never be the type of person to hold you back from your dreams even if it meant he'd get hurt.

At the start, the two of you texted all the time, and you'd show him things all the time, but slowly, he stopped responding, so you stopped texting. He couldn't bear the thought of not being with you, but he had responsibilities here in Gotham; he couldn't just go.

"Hey, Numb Nuts. I asked you a question." Jason prodded as he finally got Tim's attention after what felt like forever.

"Huh?" Tim was confused; he was so in his head that he didn't even remotely hear what Jason said.

"I said, 'Why are you so doom and gloomy?' You're moping around the place like your puppy died." Jason had noticed how low Tim had been for the last month; he thought it might have to do with you, but you left six months ago.

"You not gettin' any more texts from your girlfriend?" Jason asked a bit cheeky but it was clear that concern laced the tonality of his voice.

"No, I stopped responding. I don't wanna make her feel like she has to respond to me." Tim mumbled.

"I know you're not stupid, so why are you acting like a dumbass?" Jason stated with annoyance in his tone.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means you're being a dumbass. You know she loves you and you're ignoring her? Why the hell didn't you go with her anyway?"

"I have responsibilities here-"

"No, fuck your responsibilities; there are plenty of people who can take over for whatever you're doing. You get your ass on a flight and go to her before I beat your ass." Jason stated as he grabbed the laptop out of Tim's hands and started booking a flight.

"Go pack, you're leaving in an hour."

"Who's leaving in an hour?" Dick stretched as he walked in.

"Tim is, he's going to see his girlfriend."

"No, I'm not. Guys, I have things to-"

"Yes, you are." Jason and Dick both cut him off. Dick rushed Tim to his room and started helping Tim pack before he could even begin to process what was going on.

Jason texted you, "I have a surprise, go to the airport at 10:30. Don'tt be late."

In your mind you thought 'Aww, Jason's so sweet. My best friend's gonna meet me here.' So you responded.

"Will do. 🫡"

Several hours passed and you arrived at the airport looking around at baggage claim for Jason. He was a bitch bitch, hard to miss. You kept looking around when you spotted Tim and your heart lept in your chest, running over to him and hugging him deeply.

"Oh my god!" You squealed to his suprise. He thought you mightve moved on but hpw you were acting made it clear you hadnt. His arms squeezed you. After the hug you grabbed one of his rolling bags and helped him to your car.

"Oh my god, it took me so long to learn to drive on the other side of the road..." you started rambling and telling him all about your trips and every little detail as you drove him to your flat. His eyes followed every detail on your face, he wasnt even listening just in awe of you. Tim realized just how much he missed you, he broke out of his trance as you lead him inside.

"I bought everybody stuff, I have a box for Jason and Damian and Bruce. I am so exvited for everyone to get their stuff, its gonna be so fun..." Each box had different stuff that interested each of them, you had a box for Tim too. You still remembered everything even though its been six months. His heart swelled at how sweet you are and he just kissed you right there which interrupted your new ramblings. You shoulders fell and your hands found Tim's face as per normal abd the both of you realized home isn't a place, its a person.

Damian: "And so it seems I broke your heart, My ignorance has struck again"

He had another gala to go to for some charity event; besides, this was something his father demanded he do. It wasn't like he had a choice, did he? He's been Wayne Enterprises' new CEO since his father retired; he's been sucked up in events, meetings, and planning.

Although he had a lot on his plate it was no excuse for how distant he was being. Damian knows the date or at least he should. If this relationship is as important to him as it is to you he'll know the date. Your anniversary and this wasn't one of those little petty short ones or some shit. This was five years.

You decorated the apartment, lit candles, wrapped presents, decorated the bed with rose petals, put on music, and even made dinner and his favorite dessert. You were so excited and so proud of yourself, it took you all day while he was at work to do so.

The only reason you weren't at work is that you took it off for this reason. You thought he'd take a day off, too, but it's okay. He didn't cause you had time to surprise him. You paid for everything yourself, you didn't wanna constantly have to borrow money from him, and it was always good to have a rainy day fund.

The front door alarm chirps, letting you know he's home, and your smile grows larger. He remembered! Oh, you were so excited but that excitement faded when he just went to the bedroom? Confusion filled your features. 'What?' You followed him to the room.

Damian was quickly stripping out of his work suit into an expensive one he uses when he has to go to galas.

"Hello?" You asked all dolled up for him.

"Have you seen my blue silk tie anywhere?" He asked, not even remotely noticing the petals or how you looked.

"No, I haven't seen your fuckin tie." Snapping at him but he just rolled his eyes and didn't notice. He quickly got dressed, sprayed himself with cologne, and made his way out the door again.

You felt your heart get crushed in your chest, he might as well have carved it out and stomped all over it. 'He can remember the date for the gala but not our anniversary?' You sat there and sobbed, it's been the same date every year for the last five years. You ate dinner alone, cleaned everything up, blew out the candles, and raked the petals half hazardly into the trash.

A few candles got accidentally left out, having forgotten to drain the bathtub, several petals still lined the floor, and the presents were still left on the table.

You showered yourself and washed off the makeup that felt like it took you hours to get right, the red lipstick staining the washcloth and your lips. You quickly changed and crawled into bed, alone.

Damian showed up at the apartment hours later, he knew you'd be asleep. The galas ran long so why the hell would you need to stay up and wait for him?

He was starving; the galas didn't serve much food. The only thing you could get in abundance at a gala was alcohol, and Damian never wanted to dull his senses like that, so he didn't drink. He went to the fridge, noticing his favorite food; he put some on a plate and heated it in the microwave, making sure to stop it before it beeped so he wouldn't wake you.

He moved over to the dining table that was covered in presents, and as soon as he saw them, his heart fell into his ass. 'The 18th? Shit! I- Fuck. It's our anniversary, God Damn it.' Damian was tempted to run into the room and apologize but what would it do? It would just wake you up and that would be even more rude on top of him being a jackass already.

He ate his food and cleaned up the rest of the apartment. He needed to figure out an apology quickly. 'How could I be so stupid? Wait, that cake in the fridge said 'Marry me?' She- she wants to marry me. God, I feel awful.'

He didn't know what to do to fix this, he could make some sorta big grand gesture, but those always felt like trying to gander sympathy points, and he wasn't gonna do that shit. Damian was gonna be a man and admit how shitty of a person he is. He would just make you breakfast and apologize, take all the blame 'as one should when they're a jackass'

You came out of the room the next day, your hair messy, face puffy, eyes red, lips still stained fromnthe red lipstick, in your robe with your headphones on. You noticed he wasn't beside you and figured he pulled an all-nighter, and you went to wash your face and get coffee.

You pull out the contacts you forgot to take out last night, you rinse your eyes and throw the contacts out, putting your glasses on before going to get coffee.

As soon as your hand reaches for the coffee pot, Damian's hands find your hips.

"Uh uh, you go park yourself right over there. I'm a jackass so I'm doing anything and everything for you today. Okay?"

"Damian, it's just a date on a calendar." You tried to just brush it off.

"It's not just a date on a calendar, it's everything, and I'm so sorry. I'm not going to sit here and make excuses, I forgot because I was so wrapped up in work. I disregarded the only thing that matters in the entire world to me because I got wrapped up in stupid shit that doesn't even remotely matter as much as you do." Gently grabbing your face and looking into your eyes, the redness and puffiness had gone down but lord did his heart skip a beat to see you in those glasses.

"Now, we can't do it over necessarily, but I'm cutting my work hours. They will be designated for five hours, and then the other three or four will be crime-fighting or whatever else I have going on, and the other fourteen will always be yours. Obviously, you'll have more on vacation days or sick days or days; I just don't want to go to work. I promise you my time whenever you need it even if it is during work hours. I would be content with losing everything else but you, okay?" He continued as he kept gazing into your eyes, and you could see the level of anger he had for himself and how sympathetic he was to help you; you could see the pain in his chest that originated from him hurting you.

"Okay." You sniffled and a few tears fell down your face.

"Also, I know it was supposed to be a surprise, but if you want to marry me, I'll do it right now; we can get engaged and plan the most beautiful wedding ever. Whatever you want, it's yours, and if I can't get it, I will find a way." He said as he wiped your tears from your cheeks. You pulled him into a hug and nodded; he wasn't off the hook; hell, you'd let him off the hook before he ever let himself off of it. That was one thing you loved about him when he made a promise; he stuck to it, and there was no one more disappointed in him right now than himself.

Masterlist

[citrustan]

dating girl (jjk) #2.2

pairing: jungkook x reader

summary: you try to convince yourself that you're really okay with 'casually dating' your crush.

genre & note: college au, fwb kinda thing but more than friends ygm? angst! - here are the links for the original and the follow-up parts to be read before this one - it's giving filler chapter... 🤐

It's awkward.

You look around for a moment, trying not to feel like a loser who got ditched.

There are very few seatings available and none of them were occupied currently. You felt like even bigger of a loser because you'd be the only girl just sitting there. Nor do you want men to take it as a hint to approach you. You're rethinking coming at all.

You blow air out of your mouth as a self-soothing gesture, deciding to go grab another drink.

Suddenly remembering that you had other friends at this party, you decide to text them asking if they were around. You loosely recollect reading about their bar hopping plan on the group chat, so you're not sure. You'd have joined in if you had Jungkook to tag along. He's fun to cling to when you're drunk.

Sometimes you fake being so piss drunk that you can't move by yourself just so Jungkook would hold you up or lift you in his arms.

Thinking about this is really ruining your mood though. Because tonight, that other chick is going to enjoy his company while you act like a cunt towards your date because you can't stand up for yourself.

As you make your way back to the table, you spot Jungkook not too far from it.

Boy, is just everywhere tonight or what.

You freeze for a moment, unsure if you should approach Jungkook, or if you’d rather just stay out of his way. But before you can make up your mind, he’s already walking to you.

“Hey,” he says, lowly, as he stops a few inches beside you.

You give him a tight smile, trying to keep your tone neutral, “Hi.”

He looks around, almost as if he’s unsure of what to say next. “Mr. Tooth Fairy had to leave?”

You hum, glancing toward the door where Hoseok disappeared. “Yeah, something came up.”

Jungkook nods, his eyes flicking back to you, “I see.”

An awkward silence stretched between the two of you like a thin, fragile thread.

Finally, Jungkook clears his throat, breaking the tension, “Listen... about earlier-”

You hold up a hand, cutting him off, “Yeah, I'm sorry, I did not mean to do that. It was uncalled for."

This was too awkward. You don't know how to act around him. All you want to do it grab his head and smush your lips together.

"No, you're fine. I meant to text you back, you know?"

Right.

"Yeah, well, either way, I get the message loud and clear," you reply simply, staring him down.

"I wasn't sending any messages, _____."

"Well, yeah!"

"_____..."

"Can we not do this? I told you I hear you loud and clear. Let's move on." You were agitated.

Jungkook knows you've misunderstood his silence but he doesn't want to piss you off anymore today.

He sighs softly, tilting his head as if to study you. “Hoseok, huh?”

“Yeah,” you say, almost defensively. “He’s nice.”

“Nice,” Jungkook echoes, the corner of his mouth twitching slightly, though you can’t tell if it’s amusement or something else entirely. “That’s good. You deserve... nice.”

The way he says it makes your stomach twist. You ball your hands into a fist. You wish he'd stop rubbing it in.

“Is that supposed to mean something?” you ask, sharper than you intend.

Jungkook raises his eyebrows, his expression unreadable, “No. Just a statement.”

You let out a breath through your nose, already feeling the hair on your nape stand, “You know, if you’re trying to say something, you could just say it instead of whatever... this is.” You wave a finger at him.

Jungkook’s jaw ticks slightly, and for a moment, you think he’s going to brush you off. Instead, he takes a step closer, “Fine. I don’t like him.”

Your eyes snap to his. “Excuse me?”

“I don’t like him,” Jungkook repeats, slower this time.

"Yes, you do? He's YOUR friend." You're stunned.

"Yeah, well, I don't like him around you." He'd almost seem childish if it weren't for the way he was looking at you. Like a... predator? Not in a creepy way because this was very invited.

Your brain scrambles to process his words but all you can focus on is how it makes you feel. A shiver runs down your spine.

“Jungkook,” you say finally, forcing your voice to stay calm, “you don’t get to have an opinion about that.”

He opens his mouth like he’s about to argue, but you cut him off before he can speak--- “You’re the one who wants this,” you speak a bit quieter, "-but I..." You abruptly stop yourself, biting the inside of your cheek.

"You what?"

You hesitate, but there’s no point in holding back now. “I didn’t want this,” you admit. You could hear your heart pounding. “And I didn’t have a choice, did I? Because if I said no, you would’ve walked away. And I didn’t want that either.”

Jungkook stares at you, his jaw tight and brows furrowed, like he’s holding himself back from saying something he’ll regret.

Jungkook looked genuinely confused, “That’s not fair. You can't put this on me."

You let out a bitter laugh, shaking your head. "I know. I'm not blaming you."

There's another moment of silence.

"I didn’t want to hurt you,” he says finally, his voice was more gentle now, leaning towards apologetic.

You nod.

“Then maybe we shouldn’t have started this,” you could barely get the words out.

“I didn’t think it would get this complicated,” Jungkook admits, almost like he’s talking to himself.

You almost want to ask to be exclusive. Just the two of you. You really needed to retire that kind of wishful thinking.

Jungkook looks away and chugs his drink in a go. You hadn't noticed he even had one.

He avoids looking at you, choosing to observe random partygoers instead. You want to know what he's thinking.

You glance at his hand tucked into his pocket, briefly contemplating grabbing it.

Just when you slyly begin to inch your fingers closer to his, a third hand blocks you. It links itself with Jungkook's. You can only stupidly stare at their arms joined together, while yours hangs awkwardly mid-way.

Floor open. Swallow. Into the ground. Anytime now would be great.

"Jungkook, I'm ready to go. Take me home?" The blonde from earlier begins massaging his shoulder while you stare at the couple, dumbfounded.

Jungkook looked just as confused as you did, "Now?"

She leans in closer to whisper something into his ear, at the same time, allowing her hand to freely rub his chest, letting out a sensual giggle.

It's so obvious what she's trying to do here. Putting on a show just for you. She must see you as threat.

Jungkook briefly pulls away and glances back at the blonde, "Fine. Wait for me by the door?"

Her smile drops a little but she recovers with an exaggerated pout, "I don't know if I can be left unaccompanied any longer. Like five guys have tried to talk to me already. But I told them I'm here with you." She pokes his cheek.

That wasn't a very subtle jab at you and Hoseok.

As much as you want to push her off of Jungkook, you can admit she's not wrong. He's here with her. And the man you came with has left (momentarily or not, he still left the party.)

You don't know what you're doing standing there. There's no need for you to watch them, especially when Jungkook hasn't said a word to you in over five minutes.

Even though your conversation is long from over, it was apparent that nothing was happening today. It makes the most sense for you to walk away from them before you start crying.

Feigning disinterest, you pull your phone up and shoot Hoseok a quick text explaining your absence.

The party spirit has officially been sucked out of you by Jungkook through a giant straw jammed into your skull.

Jungkook's still speaking to his date but you've forcefully tuned them out, thinking about how you're going to take a long hot shower and change into freshly laundered clothes and hop into your comfy bed.

It's only when you abruptly walk away that you hear him call out to you. He sounded almost frantic.

"Is Hoseok back?"

You pause at that, "No, I'm heading back home as well."

"We'll walk you." Jungkook offers. It was more of a statement though.

You consider it just because of how pissed off his date looked. Her smile has been wiped off and she glared at you, daring you to accept Jungkook's offer.

Well, you guess you're both going to be having a bad night now.

"You know what? I'd like that."

note: so like it's my birthday (woohoo 🎉) and this is a little gift from me to you.... 🧍‍♀️

[colorlessjay]

In season 16, whenever Dean remembers the whole “Cas was not truly happy for YEARS before he cashed in his deal” he goes a little feral and attempts to smotherspoil him with love and attention even tho Cas is like…? with most of the extra attempts (man’s pretty simple with his wants and needs at this point and Dean fulfills them all like all the time now)

But Cas has learned Dean cannot be dissuaded from his course of action when he gets all “my beautiful wife was secretly unhappy (and maybe still is secretly sometimes!!!) and I must make up for it 😭😭!!!”

Bonus: S16 KNOWS S6 Cas is hiding stuff and is stressed and unhappy for those reasons but he’s like 😢😢 u don’t even know u want hugs rn and aren’t getting them either way

Guilt is a powerful thing ya know? It may not make us do things, but it makes us think and feel in a way that provokes action, be it good or bad

Neither Dean nor Cas, or even Sam are absolved of their crimes. All three of them have said and done things they all feel guilty for, and that guilt has made them act. Castiel, for most of his time on earth, has only ever acted because he feels guilt.

Guilt for sitting by and doing nothing for centuries, guilt for his doubt, guilt for the angels he's killed, guilt for never trusting Sam and Dean with his angel problems. Guilt for the leviathans, Mary's death, the angels' fall, for letting Dean down...

And yet, I believe Cas is able to pull himself out of that guilt after everything ha subsided. I believe Cas is able to forgive himself because he's learned that punishment does not absolve you of crimes. Cas tries to make up for his transgressions not through self punishment and banishment, but through self improvement and aiding others. It's why I think he had such a hand in New Heaven's creation with Jack

I don't think Dean is able to forgive himself. I think many people have forgiven him. But I don't think Dean will ever be able to let that guilt go, cause he's shackled to it

I can forgive Cas, but he can't forgive himself

So I like to think think that my version of S16 Dean would spend his time making up for it. He may not be able to forgive himself, but he can damn well try. He has years ahead of him, an eternity in heaven with the people he loves to look forward to (Cas made sure he knew he was going upstairs when the lights go out), and people he loves to keep loving.

So yeah, long winded way of saying:

I think Dean has an underlining fear that his husband is unhappy, both past and present. I think Dean would make up for it instinctively, pouring his efforts into his love and making sure Cas knows that Dean is gonna stick by him, think and thin

In sickness and in health

Through heaven, hell, and purgatory

-----------

anyways, ka-chaw

[genderqueerdykes]

tired transmasc from earlier. My discomfort with those who believe in "transandrophobia" is not from self-hate nor from radfems. It’s from listening to transfems. And I don’t believe men or masculinity are bad at all!! I am in community with with men and mascs and with women + fems all the time. It’s just plain ignorant to say we don’t have male privilege and are actually oppressed for being men. We do have privilege. The whole "everyone is saying men are evil!!" thing sounds so much like incel behaviour it’s really off putting.

hello again! thanks for dropping by, let me see if i can help explain things better, and as to why it's not okay to put down other trans men and deny that they are experience oppression just because you, one person, believes they are not. dont take this personally, but much like gravity, you not believing in it doesn't mean it's not happening. it's happening, you're just refusing to acknowledge it. this is the equivalent of plugging one's ears and humming when someone else starts talking

i'm gonna call this behavior for what it is, because yourself & every other self-flagellating trans man & transmasc who says transandrophobia doesn't exist because it belittles trans women are just hurting people ON PURPOSE with a thin guise of saying "listen to trans women!!!!!" i really hope you understand that trans women can see through that. we can tell that you're doing this specifically to hurt people, not to give trans women a platform to stand on. you think you are telling people to listen to trans women, but what you are doing is SILENCING trans men & mascs in order to do that. you can't do that to your own gender. you're silencing yourself in the process. you're participating in transmasculine erasure and this is not a good thing. don't be proud of that. don't be proud of erasing the things your siblings go through.

I have to be really, really honest with you and tell you that this kissing up to trans women for brownie points stuff is really, really obvious and none of us like it. Like I'm not being mean. Please don't take this in a sarcastic tone. I am stock serious when I say that trans women & transfems can tell when you are doing things to pander to us to act like you care about transfems and transfemininity. We can tell this is desperate virtue signalling to not look transmisogynistic and nothing else. I'm serious. You are hating people on purpose with the guise of trying to help trans women. You do not have to silence someone else in order to let trans women talk and listen to them.

If you do not want transfems & trans women to be silenced: do not silence someone else. You do not solve this problem by silencing someone else. We solve the problem by listening to each other, not forcing the other to sit in silence while only one person talks. You don't solve the problem by doing that exact thing to someone else. You're creating a new problem.

privilege is a power structure, trans men do not suddenly shoot up from oppressed woman to neurotypical cishet white able bodied man in terms of status in society. i need people to get this into their heads that trans men do not and will not ever shoot directly up the privilege ladder and instantly become abusive and predator and holding power over all the other queers. like this is completely fabricated. you can stop believing that now, it's quite literally made up by trans/rad fems because they do not interact with trans men irl to see that they struggle.

trans men are not oppressed for being men: they're oppressed for being TRANS men. the trans part is what they're being oppressed for. do you not see transmascs and trans men as trans? because if so that is highly disturbing. and don't call that "regular transphobia" because that's not true and you know it isn't trans men and mascs are oppressed... for being TRANS men. seriously. you gotta stop focusing on "men bad" so hard that you literally forget that trans men are trans. back it up. like seriously i'm dead serious. back it up one step. before you focus on the "man" part, think about the "trans" part and how you're basically denying that trans men are trans because you are so wrapped up in radfem hate. TRANS men do not become cis men after they come out. they don't become cis men after transitioning. this, quite literally, is transandrophobia. what you said right there is an example of transandrophobia. sober up, you are not thinking clearly.

the thing is that we do not have male privilege wholesale as a group. that is a lie you have been told. you have to realize most trans men never gain any form of cishet male privilege. some trans men may pass well, but if the word gets out that they're trans, they are no longer respected or viewed as a man at all. especially if you're a man of color. trans men may have an amount of privilege depending on the situation, like being someone's manager, but it is not male privilege in every situation, nor is it anywhere near the privilege that cishet perisex white abled men have.

when we have this type of conversation, we are assuming that all trans men are 100% cis passing who will never be questioned. which happens, but that does not mean those trans men do not struggle. in fact, trans men like that suffer greatly in terms of reproductive care. cis passing trans men are often outright denied reproductive care, and some need that to live. some need to see a gynecologist for a variety of reasons, and being a cis passing man can shoot you in the foot. trans men struggle in health care almost universally. trans men are constantly misgendered in medical settings, and are very often treated as though they are cis women by medical staff no matter what. trans men and mascs are also very commonly assaulted by doctors and other medical professionals

most trans men do not get paid more at their jobs. trans men struggle to get promotions. trans men struggle to get employment in male dominated fields. most trans men still deal with homelessness, sexual assault, physical assault, domestic violence, addiction, misogyny and more. trans men deal with corrective rape. trans men deal with stalking. trans men do not magically have it better in society the second they come out. it creates a whole new host of problems

gaslighting strangers and telling them they're not being abused and oppressed isn't helping anyone. i'm serious. please stop this behavior because you are the one hurting people. care about trans men and mascs. you don't have to throw transmascs and trans men under the bus in order for trans women to be heard. we don't need to be pandered to like this. it's not flattering or helping anyone. you don't need to kiss up to people who literally hate your gender.

i need you to understand that people who talk like this hate transmascs and trans men. they don't like you. they don't care about you. leave those kinds of environments. you're going to regret it if you don't. if you're thinking about your oppression aaalllll day long its all you're ever gonna see and eventually, it's gonna crush you under its weight. be careful. that's dangerous thinking.

[artsninspo]

COUNTERFEIT - one

➨ rio's library - good girl nbc

「 ✦ full library & archive ✦ 」

🍒 author's Note: back with another story! this is a multipart story. formerly known as cherries. it's a mix of the drinks series and forgiveless. Rio's more 'gang-friend' in this one. Enjoy ♥️

🍒 pairing: Rio (Good Girls) X Faith (Original Character) All my characters are black women.

🍒 word count: ~1.7K

🍒 summary: bad days lead to bars, friends, drinks and strangers.

🍒 one ~ cherry margaritas

If one more person calls me ungrateful I don't think I'll ever stop screaming. I shoot my sister a glare and her voice catches in her throat leaving her mouth open with words that will be left unsaid. Traitor. My anger is clear as day, and Char knows better than anyone that I've reached my limit. Amber, our ‘friend’ stops too looking up at me as I stand. I didn't invite Amber over for an earful, I invited her over for support. For fucks sake. The stare down comes to an end when Char closes her big mouth, swallowing.

“Faith” her tone is what it should have been all along but its too little too late. The call comes again but I'm halfway down the hall and to my bedroom. I walk into my closet angry at myself for thinking my sister would back me. I grab a coat and slip into a pair of baggy jeans. I kick my pumps from this evening's date night aside and grab a monogrammed bumbag.

“Faith” Amber says, wearing on my thinning patience.

“What?” I respond, casting a look over my shoulder.

“It’s not that we don't think you're great - I mean of course we do your the life of the party, you're so smart and funny”

“I’m glad I provide entertainment for you Amber” I respond and she places a hand on her chest. I brace for the perpetual state of victimhood that follows nice-nasty and outright mean.

“I didn't mean it like that!” Amber says. Whether it's fact or fiction makes no difference to me - my goal was to shut her up and when her nostrils flare I know I've achieved my goal.

“Don't be like that Faith, Jason is – being bored isn’t a reason to leave him. He literally worships you” Char continues. I wish her position was disappointing or surprising but it’s what I expect from Char now that she's been fully indoctrinated by our mothers social climb. Years of private school, country clubs and tennis lessons have her disillusioned.

“It’s fine, I don't expect you to understand” I snap, pushing past the both of them. 

“Where are you going, do you want me to come?” she asks, eyeing my casual attire.

“No, finish the wine and talk about how ungrateful I am” I respond slamming the front door to our condo. I rush to the elevator hoping they won't follow me and call a cab once I'm in the lobby. The wait is less than a minute. I turn off my location, blocking my sister, Amber and Jason for the night.

I’m too young to be so stressed, I've felt like I've been drowning for weeks as Jason turned the intensity up in our relationship in all the wrong ways. Trying to become bffs with my mother and Rick. Talking with the future, talking about expectations and children and houses. Why would anyone think I would sign up for a lifetime of the one I didn’t choose. The one Ma laid on her back and threw away everything she knew and held dear for. I’d never so eagerly trade my autonomy. I rate the driver five stars for the much appreciated silence and smile as my feet touch the pavement. I smell cigarettes and weed as patrons partake outside the bar. I can see it’s busy when I head in. Unlike anything in the heart of the city D’s place is truly one of one. Traditional wood counters, stools, a pool table, a jukebox, booth seating on one side, open space in the middle and a few table configurations for those who want to sit and talk. Everywhere is full tonight and it makes me happy for my friend as I head to the bar a man getting up to give me his stool. I look around for Diego smiling when I find him.

“Hey” I wave, and he comes over with top shelf tequila.  Smiling at my presence he makes a show of making my favorite drink a cherry margarita and tops it with five cherries. “Thanks” I beam saluting him before my first sip. “Perfection” I wince and he laughs.

“What’s up?” He asks and I chew on one of the cherries pushing the rest of them into the liquid in the hopes they absorb some of the liquor.

“Nothing much, I can help you bartend if you drive me home…” I suggest.

Diego dries a glass. “I don’t get off until three” 

“It’s fine” I shrug while having another swig.

“Doesn’t Jason usually get tickets to the big games? I was looking for you court side” He asks, looking up at the mounted TV in the bar.

“We broke up” I confess and he frowns, pausing his task.

“What’d he do? Do I need to fuck him up for you?” D asks, ready for war.

“Nothing, it just wasn’t going to work.” I admit taking another cherry. D gives me an unsure look before manning his bar. I watch the clock run out and drain the liquid from my glass, then I get behind the bar and get to work. Diego and I grew up together on the same block as kids. He spent a lot of time with me and my sister before the whispering started. People thought it was poor parenting to have him sleeping in a room with two girls. D would’ve never laid a finger on us. He moved away when I was ten and we reconnected after college. He became the big brother I never had. Now, he has his life together and I’m the wreck.

Time goes by when you’re having fun and D and I are an excellent team. Working, being busy, accomplishing something and being around D is grounding for me. There’s nothing we want from each other or hope to gain from our association and honestly it’s refreshing. D really has put everything into this place and it’s a pleasure to help him keep his patrons happy with good drinks and excellent customer service. It’s a sausage fest and the flirtation is harmless. Almost all of them are regulars and regular guys here to drink a few beers and watch the game. I make a show of eating the cherries from my glass gaining an audience, extra tips and looks of disapproving amusement from D. It's harmless rebellion, the kind of thing that Jason would spend hours scolding me for - not understanding I’m just joking around. Having a bit of fun. D’s bar is the kind of place that would make Jason itch. There’s no VIP seating, back room or slipping someone extra money to get better service. Honestly that behaviour may lead him to a black eye and pressing assault charges for his uppity ways. The thought makes me smile as the patrons file out,  I have so many tips there's no more space in my pockets so D gets me a jar. 

 By the time it’s three AM I’ve forgotten all about my breakup. D and the security clean off the tables and put the chairs up. I get the mop ready and clean the floors to save them from sticky floors when they come in later on today. The bell rings and the door opens to three men walking in. I wait for someone to tell them we’re closed but no one does. The tall slim one in all black sits at the bar and the other two go into the back. My heart rate slows as I look around for D, when I don't see him I keep my head down mopping until D comes from in the back. He greets the man and pours him something top shelf.I continue mopping until I see Diego motioning for me to come over. I do and he looks nervous. He hands me his keys. “Go wait in the car” he says handing me his keys.

“My coat” I remind D, and he nods, getting it from behind the bar for me.

“I don’t remember hiring you,” the guy drinking at the bar says, stopping me in my tracks. His voice is smooth and his eyes are too easy for him to be anything but trouble. The tattoo on his neck tells me he’s bad news, as well as how rigid D’s posture is behind me.

“She’s a friend, came to help me out” Diego says, being oddly submissive. I look up at him confused. He has at least a hundred pounds of muscle on this guy and he’s afraid of no one. The guy turns to face us and his hands go in his pockets as he gives me a slow once over. He’s hard to read.

“I didn’t know we needed help and I don’t remember getting a text that you’d have someone else closing with you” he adds. His speech is slow and calm which adds to the sense of danger about him.

“I was headed home, came by for a drink and it was getting crazy in here. I just wanted to help out” I explain and the man gives a half smile but it only makes me more uneasy.

“There are health codes, forms, certifications and things we need in case something comes up or a by-law officer stops by.  I need to know who’s behind my bar. Who’s serving my customers.” he doubles looking at D.

“I said she’s a friend,” Diego grits in response. The man’s jaw clenches but he turns around.

“Shit hits the fan, you’ll have to deal with it, not me” he says going back to his drink and I hurry out of the bar. I have a million questions but I don’t ask any the entire ride home. My mind goes to a hundred scenarios, landing on one every time if D needed money why didn't he ask me for some. If it was for protection didn’t he know better than to get mixed up with men like … whoever that was? The car slows to a stop in front of my condo and he puts it in park handing my tips.

“Take care, and if Jason needs a clue let me know” he says before kissing my cheek.

“Thanks” I smile and he hands me another jar. I smile when I realize they’re tequila soaked cherries. “Sorry for the trouble” I apologize.

“My cousin is OCD about people,” he shrugs.

“Ok” I nod wondering why I don't know this one of Diego’s cousins or that he was the bar owner. I don't push, instead I hug my friend and trust our bond before heading into the building, into the elevator and into the apartment I share with my sister.

authors note: well that's all for now folks. see you around for the next part. don't forget to ❣ Like, ❝ Comment, ↺ Reblog

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tags: @meadows5 @wnbweasley @becauseimher @ariiaeltheedonn @woahthatshitfat @miniaturehideoutmentality @kokobells @ffenthusiastt @sowhatariyana @1xtral1983 @theegoddessofmelanin @fictionalreads @roxytheimmortal @fairytale07 @rampsen

[pricegouge]

Gougie, I saw your little post about fairy!reader caught in a spiderweb and being found by Soap - and I didn't think I was in to microphilia but holy shit that one post sent me down a rabbit hole. Hot damn. Like.

I just wanna be a lil fairy, small enough for the boys to carry me around in their pockets when I'm sleepy.

Soap pries this cute lil fairy from the spiderweb but ooohh no it looks like a wing was broken in your struggle - those things are so delicate what a shame. And you look up at Soap all wide eyed, maybe a little teary bc ouchies, and he's like well he can just leave you there, flightless and injured.

Maybe there's a language barrier, so you don't really know exactly whats going on, BUT WHO CARES, this handsome human just saved you from a far worse fate than just a broken little wing. Freak matches freak, Soap wants to keep you bc your so small and sooooo cute sitting in the palm of his hand like that - and you don't want to leave! Not when this human is giving you all the attention in the world!

Basically never leave his side when he's not on a mission. If he is gone on a mission he leaves you with Kate to look after you and you are INCONSOLABLE. WHERE DID YOUR HUMAN GO?? BRING HIM BACK!!! THAT'S MY HUMAN!!!

When he comes home in one piece you get to pepper his face with tiny, sweet kisses. He can't help but laugh a little, its rather ticklish to have your little lips on his cheek. He makes sure to return the affection tho, picking you off his shoulder and cupping you gently in his palms, and then kissing you up and down. His kisses are downright smothering, but they still leave you giggling and flushed, hair a little disheveled, breathless and aching for more.

And then riding around on his shoulder while he's home from being deployed, watching every little thing he does, content to lean against his neck bc he's so warm and always conscious of you.

When he's doing paperwork you're basically a little fidget toy for him, which you are more than pleased with. He keeps you laying on your belly in his free hand, idly running his thumb up and down your back - free massage! And you just fall asleep all warm and soft until he's done. Sometimes he puts his thumb on your cute little ass and wiggles you around just for fun. Maybe if you've been well behaved and not a mischevious little shit, he'll let you grind on his finger until you're satisfied. Mumbling praise and sweet nothin's at you - you don't fully understand what he's saying, but you don't care, you love the sound of his voice and you know he's being sweet on you, and that's all you need to finish.

Ofc whatever mess you made, he can just lick clean, he has no objections there.

When he's relaxing on the couch, watching TV, you can just curl up on his chest - maybe he buttons down his shirt just enough so you can lay on his hairy chest, and keeps his hand cupped over your little body like a blanket. Feeds you bites from whatever candy or snack he has with him - he doesn't let you have any of his alcohol tho, last time he let you try a strong drink, you got drunk after just two or three sips of the stuff and you were cranky and hungover the whole next day. As lightweight as you are small.

So.... yeah.... I might just be into that shit now....

this was so unexpectedly fluffy my god :')

imagine being that small and trying to take care of him in kind. you want to help out where you can, return the favor as much as you're able because he's been so good to you, but it's so hard! chores are right out because everything is so big! and you're just a little thing :( but you can help with his person, usually. feeding him chunks of strawberries that make you sweat when you go to pick them up, breathless with effort and laughter when he snaps his teeth at you playfully. he's never taken care of his nails before you and it shows, but that's okay, you like knowing his fingers better than anyone - better even than him, probably, as you doubt he can see well enough to spot that thin, silvery thread of scar that covers his knuckle, the one you think he must've gotten when he was still young judging by how fully it's healed. you like to imagine what had caused it, almost prefer being unable to ask because this way, it could be anything. maybe he'd even gotten it while taking care of another scary spider!

and you're more than happy to help when he has... different needs.

most of the time he just likes watching you, gets himself off as you writhe on his palm or balanced precariously on the mountainous bulk of his thighs. he likes comparing you to himself when you're there, makes your face heat as he chuckles, seeing how you're barely taller than his cock. sometimes, he lubes himself up copiously and cradles you in his palm as he strokes himself, careful to let you do all the squeezing with your limbs wrapped tight around his shaft lest he accidentally crushed you. it's nice, feeling the strong pulse of his vein throbbing against your clit, your nipples catching on the ridge of his glans with every upstroke. it's better yet when he doesn't drag you along, though, lets you stay put with your mouth working against his cockhole, kissing it the way you've seen humans kiss each other, with your tongue darting in to steal quick tastes of his cum.

unfortunately, he tends to drench you when he does cum, the sticky fluid catching in your hair and blocking off your airflow until he wipes it off with a gentle thumb. he's always so sweet after though, you can't be mad at him - coos as he helps you wash it all off because he knows it's too thick for you to properly scrub. he always lets you sleep in the big bed after, something that usually gives him pause because he's so afraid of crushing you. but it seems he needs you close just as much as you need him after nights like this, even going so far as to button his shirt around you just to keep you warm and close.

[beatrixst0nehill]

"This your handywork?" Carla asked her student, Amber.

"What? I don't know what you mean...." the thin, timid girl said, looking away.

"Oh, is that right? I asked my male students and none of them had any clue. I'm not mad, Amber, I'd just like a bit of transparency, is all."

Amber got nervous. "No, it's like I said, p-probably one of the frat guys you're tutoring. Why would it be me?"

"I'm not dumb, Amber. They stare at my boobs, sure, but you get so nervous, rubbing your legs together. You sweat when I walk in the room. The guys I teach just get horny and ask if my bf or husband or whatever is making me grow out my breasts. But look at you? You're shaking, why, you look ready to rub your pussy any second."

"Ms. Thompson!"

"Just call me Carla, you sweet, horny little brat. Do you like looking at these huge breasts you're making me grow? Hm? Do they make your mouth water?"

"I swear, it's not me! I...."

Carla lifted one of Amber's hands and placed it on her breast, making her squeeze it. "You what?"

Amber was totally flush, biting her lip, softly squeezing and releasing over and over. "They're...... so soft......"

"Mmmmm, aren't they? I got to thinking, how are these boys putting breast growth drugs in my drink or whatever, then it dawned on me: they never make me anything. They offer water or a diet soda in a can but you, my dear, always offer to make us tea when I come by to tutor you. And I might have sneaked into your room last time when I said I was using the bathroom. You don't even hide it. There's a hentai background on your computer, and the first folder I clicked was soooo many images and videos of girls with huge breasts, smothering other girls, making them drink their milk as they rub the poor girl's pussy......"

"Ms. Thompson...... OK. Sorry! I did it. I really, really wanted to see you grow a huge pair of breasts. I pleasure myself every night thinking about it! I feel so bad! Please don't drop me as a student, I swear I'll stop! I--"

Carla shushed Amber, going in for a short kiss, saliva connecting their mouths as Carla ended the kiss to say, "Why would I drop you? After all the trouble you've gone through to inflate my breasts to such a ridiculous size. You better at least enjoy them." She removed her top all the way and undid her bra.

Amber watched, salivating as Carla's breasts softly bounced after she removed her bra, settling into place. "I..... want you so bad....."

Cala smiled, lifting her breasts. "Drink up all you want, they're very engorged from the drugs you give me. I can hardly stop them from lactating half the time....."

Amber placed her hands over Cala's, pushing her breasts together as she almost went in to suck them, before Carla stopped her.

"Now what are you doing?"

"Huh?"

"Strip, my little pet. Everything."

Amber blushed again, slowly taking off her clothes as she explained, "Um..... I still need you to tutor me though..... I'm kinda struggling this semester and....."

"You want me to tutor you and feed you? Bratty AND bossy. Just my type. Here's what we'll do. I'll fondle that pretty pussy of yours, as you drink from my tits. You'll get tutored if you earn it, by drinking enough milk that my breasts stop leaking on their own. So you'll have to drink liters of my milk every time we get together now, or maybe I'll swing by when they start leaking during the day, call you up and breastfeed you in public. Naked of course, rubbing your sex in front of any people passing by as you drink up as much milk as your belly can hold."

"Oh my god...... please..... I can't wait! I don't care how embarrassing it is! I'll do it!"

"Good girl. A few rules, since you started this, my little pet...... First off, if you need to piss while drinking my milk, just go. Even if we're in a crowded public place, if you're drinking from my breasts, I expect you to piss while I'm fondling your sex. Second, you only stop when I tell you, not a second before, no matter how much milk you drink. Third, if you start to fatten up from how much I breastfeed you, no dieting or exercise. I want you to know every time you look at all the added fat on your body that it's my milk making you so big. And last but not least, you will keep making me tea and drug me, so my breasts keep growing, and I produce more milk. Have I made myself clear?"

"Yes, Ms. Thompson! I promise to get fat on your milk and drink as much as I can!"

"Wonderful!" She pulled Amber against her breast, practically smothering her, holding her head, pushing her into her breast as far as it'll go, listening with delight as Amber suckled and gulped down her milk. "That's a good girl, drink up for your new owner, my little pet."

[red-doll-face]

Heeyyy! Soooo I have a fun request idea that I totally came up with on my own with no help from anybody else, from my own mind and not some super creative person that answered my question about Arthur proposing to reader 🤣 it goes something like this:

-takes three months to work up the nerve and like another one to pick out one ring.

-chickens out at least two times bc the moment isn't right

-asks Hosea for advice 19 times (Hosea is tired)

-he's the trope where reader starts crying and he's like ohh goddd i fucked up of course you don't wanna marry my ass

-the way he would ride around for a week looking for the perfect spot to do it

-marks it on his map with a heart

-the essays he would write in his journal about this situation

-he's so cute i love him pls marry me Arthur Morgan

-awww once you say yes??

Hehehehe no pressure though!!!!! I just looooovvvveeeee this idea so much!

Yes !!! Yes of course I’ll write this!!! ❤️❤️💕💕🥰🥰😵‍💫😵‍💫😩😩As always it ended up running really long even though I didn’t even really flesh out a back story. 🥲 I’m glad you enjoyed my response ☺️☺️ I definitely had high honor Arthur Morgan in mind for this when I read it, I hope it’s ok and that you like it!!! I was so happy to see you in my inbox !!! @zae-heeyyy 💓💓💓💓💓 writing this was so cathartic and I loved the rdr1 setting so much so that I made this pre black water heist or whatever 😭🫶 from Arthur’s pov hope you like the characterization 🥹

Tags: established relationship, marriage proposals?? Arthur being a major weenie. Like huge weenie. He is soooo sooo sweet it’s almost like too much and I love love love sweet Arthur so very fluffy!!!! Pre black water !! Dutch being a jerk 😒 but cute dad Hosea moments ☺️

Arthur wants things to be perfect for you.

(High honor) Arthur Morgan x fem. Reader

Arthur knows he’s made up his mind when he’s in the tailor’s shop in Blackwater, looking like a lowdown cattle rustler among all of the fancy fabrics on the wall. He and his spurs, his boots scuffed to hell and a leather satchel slung over his chest. He’s out of place and he knows it. But he’s here to buy a new shirt.

Yesterday, he had nearly driven himself insane looking for a shirt of his that wasn’t ruined, ripped and mended, dirty, stained irreparably. None of them were good enough for what he wanted, something nice to get down on one knee and ask his girl to marry him. And so he kissed you goodbye and rode into town in search of something better. He makes an effort at pretending to be interested in any of the fancy stuff, silk and linen suits that he sure will never be fitted for him. He clears his throat as the attendant drags his eyes away from the sunday paper.

A tight lipped smile consumes the man's face. Arthur already can sense the assumptions he’s getting but he pays little mind to it. He’s getting this shirt and that's that.

“How can I help you, sir?” Obnoxious and nasally, the thin and short man's voice already gives away his air of superiority. Arthur's eyes narrow but he isn’t too irritated yet.

“Here to get a shirt.” His words are simple. The attendant raises a brow.

“Just a shirt, not… pants or shoes?” the attendant lowers the paper to scan over the rest of Arthur’s clothes. Arthur can hardly ignore the burn of insecurity.

He gives a look that conveys how quickly he is losing his patience. “Excuse me?” He can only tell his posture changed when he observes the man's attitude change, clinging to the counter between them like it would make any difference.

“No, well sir, perhaps I’ve overstepped, I apologize. What kind of-of shirts were you thinking?”

“Listen, I ain’t here to cause no trouble, just show me what you’ve got,” The attendant hurries to show him some options, tries to sell him a vest but that isn’t happening with his budget.

In the end, he picks a blue french dress shirt. Costs a real pretty penny but he wants it to be special. Because you’re special. He stuffs it away in a saddlebag after thanking the attendant, who no doubt heaves a sigh of relief after he leaves.

-

He’s been collecting rings. In a special bag is a collection. A few plain gold bands, some with stones set in them. They’re pretty blue and red gems, some have filigree detailing. But he still can’t find the right one.

Worse then, is that they’re rings of all different sizes which he gets from his more sordid activities. Debt collecting or train robberies. It’s all stolen goods. It feels wrong to give you something like that but when he told Dutch his intentions, he clapped him on the back and told him to look in the collection box for more rings. He nodded then but it was half hearted. Somehow that was more souring. Did he really want to give you something he took from someone else? That someone else bought for their loved one with the express purpose of giving them something to symbolize how they loved each other? His own thoughts swirl circles in his head, why he had these scruples about it, he didn’t know.

It’s riding with Hosea that he asks for advice. They’ve been working on a job in Tumbleweed, trying to con some poor fool into giving money he shouldn’t by pretending to sell land deeds. They ride all the way from the yellow grasses of Hennigan’s Stead and it’s been mostly quiet over the stretch of passing though Armadillo. Arthur decides to speak up after they pass through town. The sun is beginning to dip a bit lower in the sky but they’ll be in Tumbleweed before then.

“I been-”

“This about you n’ the girl?” Hosea already has a knowing smile and Arthur rubs the back of his neck. “I think you should do it! You two would make quite the couple, she’s a sweetheart, that girl,”

“Yeah, she-she’s… I’ve been lookin’ at rings to give ‘er,” He grips the reins before going lax, riding easily along the path. Hosea murmurs, letting Arthur continue. He guides Boadicea down the dusty road. “I don’t think I wanna give her something I got robbin’, don’t seem right,”

“Then get her something new, I don’t think she’ll mind at all. But you do what you think you should. You could probably fence all the other rings you thought about and get her something quite nice with the cash,”

“Yeah, I could do that,” why hadn't he thought of that?

“That’s a wonderful thing, getting married. Don’t be afraid to, y’know, go through with it. If you’re thinkin’ about it. Maybe, once Dutch and I find the perfect spot for the gang to settle down, we’ll build you two your own little thing on the land,”

“You that confident she’ll say yes?” Arthur has an awkward and disbelieving laugh but Hosea keeps his earnest smile.

“Why wouldn’t she? Arthur, somehow, she has gone for a man like you, you should be over the moon, you should be whistling tunes everywhere you go,”

“Like me? What's that supposed to mean?” He knows what he means. A man like him had very little to offer you, a young woman who could easily charm some other well established man into giving you a home. Leagues away from his cot and the weathered canvas he put up to give you some small amount of privacy.

“You remember what happened with that Mary woman. This time, things oughta turn out better. This one’s got no old man to chase you around with a shotgun,” Hosea figures himself very funny and laughs, ending it with a shallow cough. Arthur furrows his brows.

Of course he reminded him of his disaster with Mary. He could never escape that woman, even when he severed ties with her. But how he had wanted to, especially with you. Yes, it was true, he had loved Mary. But now he loves you. He needs you. His idea of the rest of his life always includes you, laying in bed with him, gently stroking his chest, leaving him love notes in his satchel, telling him what happened in the camp while he was gone. He always listens, always wakes up smiling with you tucked under his arm.

“I remember just fine,” he grunts,

“Good, because you’ll forget about her soon enough. Month from now, I suppose. Where are you going to tell her?”

“Where? I didn’t think we was gonna go nowhere, just tell her when I was ready to…” he hadn’t even imagined a place when he first set out to do this.

“So you wanna propose; with Uncle standing behind her, drunk off his ass in just his soiled union suit?”

“I-”

“Take her somewhere special, somewhere to make her feel special! Women like to feel special, Arthur, you know that,”

“I do?” He says, with a sarcastic edge to his voice, though he tries on his attempt at sounding uninvested.

“You should. I didn’t do that enough. I should have before, well…” Arthur nods, bowing his head a little as if in remembrance. He hopes to always have you by his side. Otherwise he would be much like Hosea: carrying a torch for a woman who passed through his life too quickly.

-

He starts his journey looking for something special. Special like you are. Keeps his eye out, marking potential things in his map, and makes a list in his journal. Aurora Basin maybe, a pretty lake deep in the forest but getting attacked by bears doesn’t sound romantic in any way. There are some sweeping vistas overlooking the San Luis River in Rio Bravo. He isn’t quite sure about anything though, thinking it over deeply. He just wants things to be perfect.

He’s still thinking about it when he comes back to camp, close to Lake Don Julio, sighing. Thinking much too hard obviously, he doesn’t notice that you’re sitting on his bed, biting your nail nervously until you see him first. You look worried, happy to see him but worried. You stand, hugging your arms around yourself and then placing them on your hips to make you seem more upset but you just drop them when he’s close enough.

“Hey, darlin’,” He utters, opening his arms to give you a hug but you just look up at him. He drops them, mentally kicking himself before taking his hat off and sitting down on his bed.

“Arthur, you’ve been gone three days,”

“I know,” you’re disappointed in his answer. You take a breath and a pause, looking off to the right. He stares down at his scuffed and weather worn boots. He hates to disappoint you, hates when you’re upset. It takes a lot to get you there, too. You’re a forgiving soul when he knows he doesn’t deserve forgiveness. He looks away, like a dog who knew he shouldn’t have chewed those leather boots up to bits.

“You know. I asked everyone where you were and they didn’t know,”

“Honey, I ain’t gonna leave you, I’m not-”

“You leave other men out of this, Arthur,” you already predicted he’d bring another man’s failings to make up for his own. Maybe bringing up John’s shortcomings while you’re upset is a little below the belt but it worked better in his head. He puffs some air out in a laugh. God, he just can’t seem to find the right words to say.

“Is something funny? Is how much-how much I worry funny to you?” You look like you’re gonna cry, squeezing your arms tight around yourself. Your eyes flick around, thinking of all the people watching, never any goddamn privacy in this place. You start to back up, looking for a place to hide your tears.

“No, no, I- I’m sorry, don’t go walkin’ away,” You let him pull you back. Let him tug you into his lap. You sniff and tuck into his neck. “I’m sorry,” he says at least 5 more times. His hands pet down your hair, holding you. He hadn’t wanted to come back to such a harrowing fear in the pit of his stomach, the thought of you walking off without him. He thinks himself lucky that you haven’t had enough of him and decided to leave already.

Arthur pulls you in real tight, doesn’t let up til’ you start to calm down a little. “Shouldn’t cry for me, sweet girl, bastard like me ain’t worth them tears,” he wipes a few away. Seeing you like this could make him cry if he thought about it too much, how he had let you down. His nerves almost make him tremble, the slightest shake in his fingers when he brushes them under your eyes, shiny with tears. If anyone else made you cry, he’d knock their teeth out. But what is he supposed to do when it’s him? Sickness roils around his abdomen.

“Where were you, anyway?” You shake your head at his words. “Mac and Davey said…” he perks up at that. Those boys are a terror. His face screws up in an anticipated anger. He’d be angrier with them, they’re the ones who need to see it, not you.

“What’d they say?”

“No, they were just messing with me. I don’t think it’s true,” You look away. But he knows exactly how nasty those boys can be. He gives you a look and you give him a defeated one in return. An embarrassment leaks into your words. You can’t meet his eyes, twiddling your fingers.

“They said you were at the saloon in town. They said things that aren’t true and I know it but it isn’t nice to leave me here with nothing to say about it,”

“I know, darlin’, next time, you’ll be the first to know where I’m goin’,” You nod and wrap an arm around his shoulder while he pats your back, grabs your thigh so he can pull you to sit across his lap fully.

“Are you gonna answer my question or should I take their word?” you tease and he reassures you about those boys. They’ll be hearing from him soon enough.

“I’m gonna have a word with them, don’t worry about it,” he scratches his beard. How is he supposed to say that he went riding around looking for a place to take you so he can ask you to take his sorry hand in marriage? He had already disappointed you and saying it’s a secret is a laughable idea.

“Well, I was out, uhh- huntin’?” You frown and lean away.

“Arthur, you’re an awful hunter and an awful liar,” you look really hurt. You almost stand but he pulls you back. He needs something to tell you and fast.

“I was out lookin’ for somethin’ real special to give you. It’s supposed to be a surprise…but well, I can’t keep no secrets from you, sweetheart,” You fuss a little, a wariness in your posture. You study his expression. It isn’t a complete lie, makes it a bit easier to pull off. He really does have a surprise for you. He tries to keep his face neutral, but his lips twitch up when yours do to, a small smile shining through the clouds of your emotional turmoil.

“What surprise?”

“I didn’t find it, guess a surprise, it’s gonna have to stay,” You pout and wiggle, a soft chuckle rumbling in his chest.

“Ok, but once you find it, you better take me to see it right away,” You kiss him, soft and sweet, holding his prickly jaw in one hand. He can feel how your pout gives way to a smile. The feeling of your soft lips on his is one of those things he’ll never get sick of, never get over.

“I will, promise,”

-

He’s found the perfect ring, really, by chance. It’s a little thing but it’s the right color, goes well with you. The rock on it isn’t very big but he saw it in a window while in town. Some big fancy jewelry store, showing off all the finer things that he never paid any mind to. Unless it was to steal it of course. But he had bought it. With money that may have been also robbed but it was from hitting a Del Lobo stash. A good deed, probably in a backwards sense.

The girls had ‘oohed’ at it, Mary-Beth had an excited tiny clap and Tilly rejoiced. Jenny nodded with a small smile.

“We’re happy for you Arthur! Oh my god, Arthur Morgan, gettin’ married…” Tilly giggles, putting her hands to her cheeks and clasping her hands in front of the skirt of her yellow dress.

Karen laughed. “Never thought I’d see the day,”

“Don’t listen to her, I mean we was hoping when we saw you two huddled up all the time,” Mary-Beth takes the ring from him, holding it closer, so that Jenny and Tilly can get a closer look.

“Hey, be careful with that,” he murmured, trying not to sound too desperate. He scratches his neck instead of snatching it back like his instinct wants him to. Evening is coming soon, purple dusk and soft coyote yipping and howling far in the distance marks the sun's descent. Meaning you’re probably finishing up whatever it is you’re doing. He hopes you don’t come around the corner at an inopportune time. Arthur turns his head this way and that.

“Where’d you get it? Looks new, ain’t scuffed to high heaven like everything else around here,” Jenny points out and the girls nod.

“Bought it in town,” playing it off doesn’t work so well.

They ‘ooh’ some more. “Fancy. Only the best for Arthur’s sweetheart,” Karen coos teasingly.

“Gimme that,” grumbling, he takes the ring back, bowing his head so they can’t see the embarrassment plain on his face. He meanders off after asking how things have been. Of course, they only give him updates about you, Karen jokes that that’s all he wants to hear about anyway. He scoffs and wishes them a good evening.

But the perfect spot is yet to be discovered. Evades him like just about nothing else. He almost gives up on the idea. He’s been taking you out, trying to get you in the almost perfect moments. Taking you out on the town in Blackwater was a good time, he bought you dinner and took you on a stroll down the cobbled streets, watching your face light up when you saw something pretty in a window, clutching his hand and pulling him in more. He almost proposed on the veranda at the Blackwater saloon. Only for a fight to break out at the poker table to interrupt.

Then he took you out to see the poppy fields in Great Plains. But he had let his anxiousness and his nerves overtake him. He had tucked the ring away. You had looked so beautiful standing among the flowers, it was perfect but he just…couldn’t. Instead, he wrote in his journal about his own cowardice. Wrote about if he should lock you to him for the rest of your life. If he’d end up leaving you a widow. Or if you were to be taken from him like Annabelle and Bessie. Leaving behind lonely men who longed for a woman gone from this world. Then he scribbled pictures of you, trying to draw the motion in your hair and in your dress and the beaming most enchanting smile he had ever seen.

Boadicea munched on the long wheat grass, waving in the wind while he kept a watchful eye on you, picking flowers in your pretty dress fluttering against the bright blue of the sky. You have a bunch of candy orange poppy flowers held together by your palms, a bright smile on your face. You walk to where he sits, leaning against the tree, next to a small broken down stone fence. Your smile falters when you see his pensive expression. You come close enough to touch. You dangle one flower above him before you tuck it into the frayed ropes banded around the crown of his hat. He lowers his head while you fuss. Smiling like a fool. You smile again too, sitting beside him. You both listen to the sound of the quiet plains, breeze in the branches above him. The shade is cool, light filters beautifully over your features, speckled like the back of a doe.

“Something has been going on with you, Arthur,” you state as pure fact, knowing him all too well. You had only really known each other a year and have only been together as a couple for six months but you knew him better than anyone else. You had let him be himself, let him just…be. He didn't need to say anything for you to understand him.

“I’ve just been… thinkin’ bout some things,”

“Really? I thought you said you weren’t very good at that,” you smile a little, nudging his shoulder. Hoping to lift his spirits with his similar brand of humor but when he hardly huffs a laugh, you frown. “Is it about you and me?”

“Yeah, in a way,” he says, unable to hide anything from you. Why should he bother? Saying no would make you more suspicious. Arthur closes his eyes and can feel the panic rising in you. He could have been better about saying it but he’s quick to deflect it away from his secret. “You happy with me?” low and grumbled, the severity makes his tone go way down.

“I don’t understand. Do I not seem happy? Arthur, I’ve never…I’ve never been happier than I am with you. You’re the kind of man any girl would be lucky to have,” You smile, leaning to face him. Softening up, your eyes track over his face.

He wanted to ask you right then and there. Tell you just how much you complete him. How lucky he was to have you, how there never was a happier time in his life. He doesn’t believe in that sentiment you have, he had failed the women in his life. But he had wanted to make a vow, to never leave you alone. It’s his own nerves that wrap tight around his hands, don’t let him reach in his satchel for the little treasure that will be your wedding ring.

“No, I just know I been gone, I don’t wanna ignore you. I just been busy,”

“You have things to do,” You sigh heavily. “I wish the other men would be as helpful as you. Sometimes, I watch Sean, Uncle, and Bill lay around all day while you’re out working. It doesn’t seem fair,” Your brows pinch in a small dissatisfaction with the idea. He smirks.

“I don’t know how much I trust Sean to get things done right. We’d probably eat nothin’ but leaded rabbit meat and whiskey if we left it up to that boy,” You giggle and nod. Happy to see him back in his joking mood.

“Arthur… You know I love you, don’t you?” God, those words make him shiver. Make his heart rattle in his chest. Could swear his insides turn about 3 times. So sweet, you look at him, hands on his thighs, leaning into his side. He opens his arm for you to tuck into, grabbing your waist to pull you close.

“Yeah, I do. Love you more,” he can feel heat flush up his neck and cheeks but he doesn’t care if he looks like a lovesick idiot. Your joy is worth it. The wind blows your hair over your shoulder, you let him sweep it back some more. Your pretty laugh when he bows over to lay you down on the grass makes him chuckle.

-

He’s finally found it. Montana Ford. A shallow spot in the river he discovered, looking for a short cut trying to cross from New Austin into West Elizabeth. He hated riding through the Del Lobo populated Thieves Landing, especially after they were catching on that it was Dutch and his boys robbed their stash two weeks ago. He sighed and then he veered off the road, looking for somewhere to cross. And the shaded river was perfect.

He stays there a moment, looking at the pretty grass growing alongside the water, the light glittering over the surface. The sound of the river rushing by fills his head pleasantly. You’d love it, you’d toss your boots aside and wade into the river, lifting your skirts high enough to hopefully not get wet. But you’d be wet anyway. He’d do it too, you made him feel like he was twenty despite his thirty some years on this earth.

He decides to sit and sketch it and write about you. Just how excited he was at how everything was coming together. He feels like a kid, sappy but too devoted to care very much at the small heart he puts on his map. He’s almost embarrassed of himself. Even with no one to see. He folds his map up and stuffs his journal away, whistling his horse over. With a soft word or two, he mounts up and continues on to his destination.

-

It's been three days since he found the spot he would take you to and he’s had a ring in his satchel that glares up at him every time he opens it to pull out a cigarette. Of course, just as everything comes together, Dutch insists he go scouting for some new venture, looking to follow a treasure hunter so they could rob him. It ends up being a whole lot of nothing from a bad tip but Dutch has a ‘nothing ventured, nothing gained’ speech to try and lick his own wounds at Arthur’s expense. Arthur rolls his eyes. Feels his hands knot into fists.

“Maybe next time, it’ll be you runnin’ all over New Austin on some wild goose chase! And I’ll give you this bullshit. Wouldn’t that be just fine, wasting your goddamn time-”

“Arthur, calm down! I don’t have time for your complaining. Where is that girl of yours? Why don’t you blow some of that steam off with her? It’s obvious to me-”

“Dutch…stop pushing the boy,” Hosea remarks from where he’s reading a book nearby. Arthur postures to continue arguing and Dutch shoots a glare before waving him off. He looks to Hosea and backs away, huffing. But before he can go for a smoke to hopefully calm himself down so he could be with you, Hosea calls him over.

“So… have you popped the question?”

“No, I ain’t got time most days,” He sighs in defeat, dropping his weight on the seat next to him, resting on his knees, leaned over. He takes his hat off to adjust his hair before putting it back on. He hadn’t seen you in another two days on account of this stupid ploy to rob a treasure hunter who didn’t know left from right and east from west. What an idiot. But not nearly as foolish as he.

“Tomorrow, I’ll tell Dutch to leave you out of these plots of his. I’ll even tell Miss Grimshaw that she’ll be gone. Take her and ride away for a couple of days. I hope to see a ring on her finger when you get back. In fact, I’ll be expecting it!” Hosea has a smile on his face, the excitement is genuine. Arthur nods.

“And what if she says no?”

“Well you keep at it. Perhaps a little persistence is all you need but why do you insist on imagining the worst?” It’s as if after asking, he considers why Arthur might not want to change things irreparably, might have already put his heart on the line and had it thrown away before.

“Arthur, the sting of rejection must be pretty…pretty lamentable. But you wouldn’t be trying this hard if you really thought you didn’t have a good chance,” Hosea sets his book down. “Go get some rest… leave first thing in the morning,” Hosea pats Arthur lightly on his shoulder. Arthur looks up as Hosea wanders in the direction of his tent.

His heart does yearn to see you at his side, wearing his ring on your finger. To hear you referred to as Mrs. Morgan. But all he can see is an incredulous look on your face. ‘Marry? Me? Arthur, you must be joking,’ you laugh and laugh. You’d never be so cruel but whatever part of him hates his own guts imagines the scenarios with great fervor. The anger from the rest of his day and the anger at himself grit against each other. He growls low before marching off to his tent.

You’re already inside, looking very lovely, one of his mended shirts serving as something of a robe to wear over your underthings. You look up and smile. He could forget the whole world just by looking at you. You hum, scooting over in bed.

“Arthur…” the way you call his name, you hardly need to give him any pet names, just Arthur will do.

“Come out with me tomorrow. First thing in the morning,” He states. More like a command, the residual anger drips off his words. You look at him strangely.

“Alright but I’d like to know what all of this is about first,” You set whatever you were working on, perhaps brushing your hair as you set a horsehair brush aside. You give him a concerned look.

“Found that surprise,” he grumbles, sitting down and tugging his boots off. “Hope you’ll like it but…” he stops to tug his gun belt off, his suspenders too. Arthur rests his hat gently on the side table. “Can’t be too sure til I show it to ya,” You smile softly.

“I think if you think I like it, I’ll love it,” God, he hopes so. Anticipation bounces around in his head and in his lungs. He’s practically short of breath. How he’s going to sleep, he has no idea.

“Yeah?” you hum in agreement. Looking sleepy, he’s endeared by how your eyes blink slowly, how you wiggle onto his chest the second he lays down. Your hands rub down his chest and belly. You’re asleep in a matter of minutes. He almost wishes he had you for company still but he’d never wake you for something so selfish. Instead, he pets down your hair and listens to your breathing, the natural hush that covers the camp once it’s too late for much of anything but small chatter.

-

Like clockwork, he wakes early. He can’t remember falling asleep but you're softly murmuring, you won’t wake unless he expressly wakes you. He gives himself time to put on that shirt he bought and rub his hand over his face at how nervous and silly he feels buttoning it up. He pulls a jacket over it to hopefully hide how ridiculous he looks. The morning is a pale blue when he steps out, thinking to bring you coffee to wake you.

You dress, half asleep, when he comes back to you, humming into the cup he brought you. You wear something nice but not overstated. You put kisses on him to wish him a good morning after you’ve decided you’re cleaned up enough.

He helps you up on his horse, Boadicea already very used to you. The ride isn’t too bad and you certainly make it better, he’s quiet with nerves, responding as much as he can without getting lost in his thoughts. The sun has climbed up and blazed down on you for a while by the time you get there. But your face when you see his surprise is too precious, eager to slip off the back of his horse.

“Arthur, it’s so beautiful!” The summer sun is high in the sky, perfect for your plans as you tug your boots off. He ambles after you, hitching his horse to a tree. You’re already sighing and knee deep in the center of the river. Your stockings lay haphazardly tossed over your boots. You’re some fabled creature, come from somewhere else. He could see it. No woman shined like you did, at least not how he saw things.

Just like he imagined, he rolls his pants up and tosses his boots aside, the spurs jingle when they hit the ground. The light catches the river’s surface, shades of yellow and green, the earth's gentle brown. You’re excited to see him join you, taking his hand that he holds out to you, pressed to his belly and chest, just where you belong.

“You like it, sweetheart?” He mumbles, really fishing for compliments. He knows you do but he’d love to hear you say it.

“I love it, Arthur, how could you say I wouldn’t? Sometimes, you’re a silly man,” you laugh, sway with him in the river. Birds sing, the water is cool, it’s perfect. He pulls you up to a shallower part of the ford, the sun forms a halo around you, reminds him you’re pure heaven and he couldn’t let you go.

“I have something else for you,” his voice is shaky instead of the easy confidence he likes to portray himself as. You look up excitedly but the dazzling smile slips off your face, you're shocked as he pulls a ring from his satchel and kneels down in the river.

“I-uhhh…I-“ he had really planned all of this and didn’t think of a single word to say. He can't bear to look up, he’s sure he’ll lose his nerve. “I haven’t loved…anyone like I love you,” the ring looks tiny and pathetic in his fingers. They’re also calloused to hell but he continues anyway. “There ain’t anyone else for me in this world but you. I just wish I was a better man, you deserve more than I can give but… if you would have me,” he looks up and your hands cover your mouth and tears leak over your fingers.

He really had ruined everything, hadn’t he? How was he supposed to go on living with you? What would he tell Hosea? His face falls and his heart cracks but he’d be glad to take you back home and disappear for a few days.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart, don’t know what I thought,”

“Arthur, just please…” you hold out your left hand. You wipe your tears, trying to compose yourself and when he sees your smile, your hand over your right cheek, he lets himself ease. “Nothing would make me happier than to be- to be your wife, Arthur, you are…you’re the best man I know,” you wiggle your fingers excitedly and he slips the ring over your ring finger. He stays stunned, kneeled in the water, his pants soaking it all up but he couldn’t care less.

The ring looks so perfect on you. He holds your hand, kissing it like a knight of old, looking at him down on his knee, still crying but that brightness in your eyes is all he needs. Your giggle makes him smile at you too. And you drop to embrace him, tucking into his chest, arms around his neck. You murmur his name, rub his back. Tangle your fingers in his hair. He settles with you, surrounded by your unmistakable presence, basking in it. Holds you tighter, trying to not squeeze the air out of you. He breathes you in, holding you through your overwhelmed clinging, wiping your tears on his shoulder.

You pull back a little, enough to kiss him, his relief is groaned into your mouth. He loses track of himself and slips, sitting in a river with you in his arms, giggling more into his kiss.

You sit with him on the banks, trying to dry out after he tipped over. So much for his fancy shirt. He thinks the both of you will look half drowned by the time he brings you back to camp but he isn’t sure he wants to go back. Just you and him for a few days sounds rather enticing. You keep looking at your ring, leaned into his shoulder. A pleased little smile blooms over your face. How can he not smile at how beautiful you look, hair wet at the ends, warm light casting its glow over you.

You look up at him, with a look that says you’re gonna cry again but you just give him a teary smile.

“I’m a lucky bastard, get to call you mine,” You wrap one tiny hand over his neck when you kiss him slow and deep, letting him consume the very air in your lungs, grip over your body to feel it. You moan just softly enough to pull on his need for you. But you part ways for you to continue.

“Did you really think I’d say no?” you give him a sad frown. As if upset that he would think such a thing of you. You brush your fingers against his skin. He looks away.

“You wouldn’t have been the first,” you sigh.

“Who could say no to Arthur Morgan?” You ask no one in particular but he huffs a small laugh.

“Many people,” a joking tone tinges his words. But then he dips towards the sentimental. “Don’t even remember, really, all I think about is you, darlin’…” You laugh before coming closer, unable and unwilling to part from him. He knows he’s a hundred and one percent sap but he lets himself melt in your presence.

“Well, it certainly wasn’t me,” you wiggle your left hand in his face. He chuckles a little at your cute little fingers. “I’m glad…it means I get you all to myself,” The joy is boundless in his chest, he could light the night like a lightning bug with the flame in his heart.

“Arthur, I… I… sometimes I don’t have the words to tell you how much I love you,” you lean onto him. He shakes his head with what he’s sure looks like a stupid grin on his face. He wasn’t sure this would be in the cards for him but here he is, with you.

“Every part of me loves you, honey,” is all he has to say, paling in comparison to the pure power of your own words over him. They tumble clumsily from his mouth but you pull him down for kisses anyway. Your teasing ‘do you?’ has him nodding between your giggles and wet kisses.

-

Thank you so much for leaving me this request, I loved writing it!! It was so much fun and I really had fun including some parts of rdr1 map that were really special to me and brought me back to when I was a kid playing that game 🥹🥹🥹🥲🥲🥲❤️❤️❤️ any feedback is appreciated and thanks for reading 🥰🫶

[itoshiabi]

His Biggest Win

Summary: After losing the match against Bastard München, you tried to cheer Shidou up but you two ended up having rough sex in the locker instead.....

"And that's the final whistle! Bastard München clinches a hard-fought victory with a 3-2 scoreline against Paris X Gen!"

The referee's whistle echoes across the stadium as the commentator announces the triumph of Bastard München.

"Tch... That damn Isagi and Kaiser..."

Shidou huffs with annoyance as he tries to steady his breathing. Looking at the bastards of Bastard Munchen celebrating their victory flares up his irritation more.

Normally he's not like this. His satisfied with the lost if he can play at his heart's constant and can enjoy the game. He did enjoyed today's game too... And scored a goddamn goal too along with the long eyelash's little brother. It was a peak game and he was horny the whole time because of just how the exciting the game was......

But this loss stings differently. Not when you're sitting in the VIP section, watching him. Not when he wanted to win for you.

As his eyes meet yours, a flicker of warmth crosses his features. You smile brightly, waving at him, your expression brimming with pride. Then, you blow him a playful kiss, silently reassuring him.

You had seen every moment of his performance—how fiercely he played, how he dominated on the field. For you, it didn’t matter that his team lost. Shidou had shone brighter than anyone else on that pitch, and you can't be any prouder.

Catching your flying kiss, Shidou smirks in return, his signature mix of arrogance and charm. Without another word, he turns and heads to the locker room with his teammates. Not wanting to wait anymore, you too quickly make your way toward the locker room area. Your heart races with anticipation and you're ready to remind him just how incredible he truly is.

Shidou is always angry, but he's only a little bit calm and gentle when he's with you. He always tries to be kind to you, to control his horny side whenever he's with you.

Only because you're a sweetheart, HIS sweetheart.....

But as you enter the locker room with the proud big smile on your face, wearing HIS jersey......

He couldn't control himself anymore.

"Ryo.... Baby.... You were awesome....."

You exclaim cheerfully as you jump on your half naked boyfriend who's just wearing his shorts. Shidou catches you immediately and you wrap your arms around his neck while you press a soft kiss on his cheek.

"I'm so proud of you baby....."

You say as you wrap your leg around his waist and blush slightly feeling his arousal against your thighs. Shidou presses you against the locker and smirks proudly....m Not because of the goal... But because he's proud about the fact that he's the reason of the cute pink blush on your cheeks.

"Damn it, baby, what the hell would I do without you?"

Shido smirks, closing the door of the locker and lowering his pants immediately. He never likes to delay.

He's aroused now, inpatient too...... And the only thing that can calm him down was good sex, and you understand that too.

"Baby.... What if your teammates will suddenly see us? Or hear us?"

You ask as you hug his neck tightly and you blush feelings his hard dick against your clothed pussy. The suffocating environment of the locker is making you feel more hotter now.

Shidou chuckles darkly, gripping your hips tighter as he grinds himself against you.

"Let 'em watch, let 'em hear," Shido growls, his breath hot against your ear. "They're just jealous they don't have a sexy girlfriend like me."

With a swift motion, he pulls his jersey off your body, smirking proudly. His hands immediately cup your breasts, thumbs rubbing over your nipples through the thin fabric of your bra.

"Fuck, you're so damn perfect" he groans, leaning in to capture your mouth in a rough, possessive kiss. His tongue invades, claiming every inch of your mouth as his own.

You moan into the kiss, your body trembling with desire as he gropes you roughly. Your hands slide up his chest to tangle in his hair, tugging gently as your tongues dance together.

"Mmm... Ryo" you breathe out between kisses, your voice husky with need. "We shouldn't... here..."

But even as you say it, you're arching into his touch, your nipples hardening under his palms. The thrill of being caught, of doing something so naughty and forbidden, sends a shiver down your spine.

"Oh, but we totally should," Shido argues, his fingers deftly unhooking your bra. "No one's gonna bother us for a few minutes. They know better than to mess with me when I've got a hard-on."

He tosses your bra aside, his gaze devouring the sight of your bare breasts. Without hesitation, he leans down to take a nipple into his mouth, sucking hard as his hand massages the other.

"Mmm, fuck yeah" he murmurs against your skin, sending vibrations through you. "Gonna make you scream my name."

"Oh god, yes!" You whimper, your eyes closed as you lean back against the wall of the locker, hips rocking instinctively against his hardened dick. You glance around frantically through the hole of the locker door, hoping no one stumbles upon you two. But the locker room is eerily quiet, save for the sound of your heavy breathing. You relax a little and moan softly, caressing his hair as he keeps sucking your nipple.

"Make love to me right here, Shido. This is what you deserve after scoring that damn awesome goal."

He releases your nipple with a pop, a trail of saliva connecting his lips to your breast before he smirks up at you.

"That's the spirit, baby." Shido praises, his voice low and gravelly with arousal. "You're so fucking sexy when you beg for it. And I'll give you exactly what you want" he promises, reaching between you to undo your shorts. He yanks them down along with your panties, leaving you bare and exposed.

"Gonna fill you up so good, make you forget about everything but my dick....."

He lines himself up against you, the tip of his cock pressing against your entrance. With a deep grunt, he thrusts forward, burying himself inside you in one powerful stroke.

"Ryo......." You cry out in ecstasy as he fills you completely, your walls clenching around his thick length. The sudden intrusion makes you see stars and you cling to him desperately, your nails digging into his shoulders.

"Fuuuck, you feel incredible" Shidou groans, his hips starting to move in a relentless rhythm. "So tight and wet, just for me."

The lockers creak ominously as he pounds into you, each thrust driving you harder against the unforgiving surface. Your cries of pleasure echo through the empty room, mingling with the sound of skin slapping against skin.

"Yes, oh god, yes!" You moan shamelessly, meeting his fierce thrusts with your own desperate bucking of hips. Your  head falls back against the lockers, your hair whipping wildly as he takes you with primal intensity.

"You're mine, all mine" Shido growls, his voice raw with possession "Never forget that, baby."

His words send a thrill through you, and you wrap your arms around his neck, holding on for dear life as he fucks you with reckless abandon. The force of his thrusts shakes the lockers, and you're sure someone must have heard by now, but you can't bring yourself to care.

"That's right, you're mine too" you pant, your voice high and breathy. "And I'm yours, Ryo.... Forever and always."

Your words seem to spur him on, and he drive into you even harder, the head of his cock hitting that sweet spot deep inside with each stroke. The pressure builds rapidly, coiling tighter and tighter until you're teetering on the edge of climax.

Shido's pace becomes erratic, his hips slamming against yours as he chases his own release.

"Come on, baby, let go" he urges, his voice strained with effort. "I wanna feel you squeeze my cock when you cum."

His words are enough to push you over the brink. With a keening wail, you convulse around him, your inner muscles clamping down on his throbbing shaft as waves of pleasure crash over you. The intensity of your orgasm seems to trigger his own, and with a guttural roar, he buries himself to the hilt and spills inside you, filling you with his hot seed.

As the aftershocks subside, Shido slowly eases out of you, his softening cock slipping free with a wet plop. He keeps you pinned against the lockers, his body still pressed intimately to yours, as if reluctant to break contact.

"Fucking amazing" he breathes, nuzzling into your neck. "You always know how to make me lose control."

After a moment, he carefully sets you down, helping you steady yourself on shaky legs. He gets out of the locker after wearing the his pants and checks if anyone's out there or not. Then he hands you some wet tissue as he helps you to clean yourself while he cleans himself too. After getting dressed and fixing your hair you both walk out of the locker room and you smile as you see his other teammates coming out of the shower room.

"Are you coming, Shidou-San? Or will you be with your girlfriend?"

Nanase asks as Shidou waves his hand with annoyance.

"Spare me for the night. I wanna be with my girlfriend."

You smile at Nanase as he nods back at you. Shidou practically pulls you towards him and forces you to walk out of the stadium.

"Tch... It always annoys me when you smile at another guy."

He says with annoyance as he wraps his arm around you neck and you smile.

"That's just courtesy, Ryo.... Anyways.... Let's go home.... I bet you're tired and need some sleep."

Shidou smirks widely and leans his face down towards yours.

"Just sleep?"

You blush and push his face away.

"Yes only sleep.... Because we both need that now."

[call-sign-shark]

Heyaaah Reb. Shark's back again. My apologies for the messy comment but my mind is screaming because of this chapter and typing on an old keyboard with my long nails is a pain in the ass.

What a rollercoaster of emotions it was. It was such a satisfying read as they finally stop fighting against that irresistible pull they experience. First of all I thought it was adorable that Nina loved baking and thst it was her first way to keep her mind busy. As soon as Tommy joined her, I looked forward their heartfelt conversation but gosh I wasn't ready. I didn't expect her to open up entirely to him but it felt so freaking good. My poor love, she must have felt suffocating her own damn life. The line “This pain that you have,” he whispered, “share it with me" had me melting. I'm sucker for this kind of hurt/comfort trope. I don't know how he does that but he always find the right word to say to reassure her. This is directly linked with this line "She didn’t know how else to explain it except to say that they seemed to understand each other." its exactly what I was trying to say, they understand each other on a diffrent level and I can't imagine how relieving it shoud be for Nina, who has been misunderstood all her life. To the extent she thought she was the problem, the abnormal one.

And I found out Stefano and his brother had a habit of dragging girls into their car. I didn’t know what it was that they did to them, back then. But it was scary. I stole my brother’s pocket knife, just in case, and always took it with me.” -> GOSH SOMEONE KILLS STEFANO PLEASE. He's a monster.

“He asked me if I had, perhaps, done something to… encourage that behaviour. To make him believe that I wanted that kind of attention.” -> I know it was a common thought and still is but brooooooooo it got me angry (and sad for Nina who's got blamed)

Then, I must say that I particularly adore how you describe the longing Tom has for Nina. I'm reallz fond of of those scene in a fic where we get to see the other character's pov and how he's getting intoxicated by the MC. You did an excellent job at conveying how he's now walking on thin ice.

And last but not least.... THIS IS THE MOST ROMANTIC AND HEARTWARMING SMUT I?VE NEVER READ. Tommy taking her virginity so carefully and always asking for her permission had me screaming. He's so considerate I could feel how much he cares for her as the words aligned. Nina's reaction also astounded me: this is so raw, so realistic for a first time. Whether it is the fact the first finger he inserts in her feels midly uncomfortable or the pain of being penetrated for the first time. Her little thoughts like "it couldn't possibly fit' made me giggle but they were also so realistic. I really loved it. This was really an intense and passionate sex scene -- and also so important for Nina. A threshold has been crossed and these two are going to be inseparable <3

"that was what Nina had been warned about all her life. That was the sin she had been taught she should avoid at all costs, the sin that would bring shame and ignominy upon her and all her family." -> I think this was one of my favorite liens of this chapter. The word are so simple but heavy with meaning and importance. It echoes to Nina's deepest core, here fears and education. It also felt so true to the thought of a girl discovering the joy of se in a first love/safe context. Gosh I just wanted to pat her shoulder and smile at her proudly.

Also can we talk about Tommy cleaning her afterwards? What a gentleman.

I loved it Reb, so happy to get back to one of my favorite work ever written.

Heart, Body and Soul || Tommy Shelby x OC

CHAPTER 9

Summary: Tommy learns something more about Nina as she opens up to him about her past. Unable to ignore the feelings they have for each other any longer, they reach a point of no return.

Warnings: mentions of arranged marriage, slow-burn, small age-gap (Tommy’s 30, Nina is in her early 20s), time-typical misogyny, references to past attempted assault, harassment, violence, no proofreading, English is not my first language. This is set between season 1 and 2. This chapter is 18+, smut (it’s a spoiler but I need to say it). This is my first attempt ever at smut cause it isn’t my cup of tea, so it might not be that good. Also I didn’t want it to be just porn but I wanted it to be ✨functional✨ to the story and tell something, so I hope I did that.

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SERIES MASTERLIST

Gif credits

Dividers credits

Nina muttered a few curses under her breath as her elbow accidentally hit the bottle of milk standing on the table, spilling its content everywhere. She hastily grabbed some rugs, trying her best to contain the damage. Maybe deciding to bake so late at night hadn’t been her best idea. But she needed to keep herself busy or she would’ve lost her mind, because apparently sleeping was no longer an option for her.

She couldn’t sleep without having nightmares anymore, and all of them involved the same person. Stefano. Sometimes he had her pressed into the wall again, and no matter how hard she screamed, no one would come save her. Sometimes he was standing in her father’s study, arranging their marriage as if she weren’t there. Sometimes he was waiting for her at the end of the aisle, with a grin on his face and a glimpse of victory in his eyes. And every time she woke up feeling his weight on her again, and his breath on her face, and his hands up her legs. She told herself she was being dramatic, that she should’ve been glad nothing had actually happened and forget about it, but the feeling of disgust that had been pervading her since that fateful morning just wouldn’t go away.

What her father had said during the lunch had been the last straw. All that talk about leaving her free to make her own choice was nothing more than empty words, a way of keeping her sweet until he managed to persuade her. And she was scared, because she knew that if he made that decision for her, she wouldn’t have a say in the matter. Because the alternative would’ve been a break with the Spinietta family, and that was something they couldn’t afford.

She missed her nightly talks with Tommy. For almost a month, he had managed to take her mind off all the ugly things that were happening in her life. Talking came easy with him. She didn’t know how else to explain it except to say that they seemed to understand each other. It was surprising, to say the least. Sure, there were parts of him that stayed a mystery to her, and parts of her that she still couldn’t let show, but they felt more like something to discover rather than an obstacle. Still, that meant nothing. Those parts were not hers to discover, and he wasn’t supposed to get any closer to her than he had already done. So they had pushed each other away, and reduced their interactions to the bare minimum. But that didn’t make it any easier. She missed him, despite her attempts to keep him out of her head, and now that they didn’t talk anymore it was as if she was on her own again, trapped into a world that spoke a whole different language.

However, Nina wasn’t the only one who felt the weight of that distance. She was the one person who had made Tommy’s stay in Italy somewhat bearable, and her detachment had left him feeling… hollow.

It had also brought him back to the reality of his situation, though. There was a war going on on more than one side, and he needed to do what was necessary for him and his family. He was walking on a thin line that became more precarious the more he waited. He had two days left to propose, or else the deal would be off, and God knew what would happen then. The most absurd part of it all was that what rationally should’ve been his major concern was overshadowed by something else entirely. He was scared of what would happen to Nina once he’d be back in Birmingham with Agnese on his arm. He didn’t know what was exactly going on with Spinietta, but if there was one thing he had learned, it was that when a man there decided he wanted something, he’d take it, one way or another.

If he could’ve been sure it wouldn’t have started yet another war, Tommy would’ve taken his eyes days ago. And when It didn’t matter how much he told himself that it was the injustice that made him furious, deep down he was aware it wasn’t true. The truth was he cared about Nina. He cared about her in a way he wasn’t supposed to. He had no idea how it had happened, but she had managed to make her way into his heart with steps so light he didn’t even realise it until it was too late. And now thoughts of her filled his mind night and day.

He didn’t think he’d ever feel like that about someone again, after Grace. Grace had been the first person he had opened up to in a long time, he had allowed her to see those parts of himself he never let show, and he had realised there was still a small light inside of him, a sparkle that had survived the storm brought by the war. And he had thought that maybe there was still hope for him. When she betrayed him, the darkness engulfed him again, and any shred of hope he had left faded into dust. But just like a match, Nina had made that sparkle burst into a flame, showing him that it had never been extinguished in the first place. It overwhelmed him how much he wanted her. He could feel her in his bones, in his veins.

It would’ve been a lie to say that the thought of talking to her father hadn’t crossed his mind. But Nina was not something he could take for himself. He couldn’t rob her of her freedom. Even he wasn’t that bad. He could only be content with the little time he had with her, and carry it with him when everything would be over. Maybe that was the reason why he walked out of his room that night, in the hope that she’d be in the kitchen, making herself her terrible tea.

And there she was, except that - much to Tommy’s confusion- she wasn’t making tea. She was surrounded by bowls and pans, and there was flour spilled all over the table. Apparently unaware that she was no longer alone, she kept on stirring the batter with a whisk, with an aggressiveness that gave away her inner turmoil.

“What are you doing?” He caught her attention, earning himself a brief glance before she shifted her eyes back on her work.

“Baking,” she replied, her imperturbable expression clashing with her snappish motions.

Tommy frowned, walking further into the room. “It’s three in the morning, Nina.”

“I couldn’t sleep.”

Nina’s statement made him cock an eyebrow in disbelief. It didn’t take a genius to guess that she wasn’t baking in the middle of the night because she craved some sweet treat, and her short answers and dismissive behaviour were all Tommy needed to understand that there was, in fact, something going on in that mind of hers.

Slowly, as one would do with a wounded animal, he approached her, and he could’ve sworn her breath had hitched in her throat. “Are you alright?” He asked, coming to a stop next to her.

Her movements ceased, and her hand clenched around the whisk before she let it go. She swallowed, keeping her gaze on the table, and Tommy wondered whether that reaction was due to the question or their proximity.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” She recollected herself, sending him a sideward look.

Tommy knew better than to push her. Insisting would only cause her to shut down even more, and that was the last thing he wanted. So he pretended to believe her, and took a seat at the table without another word.

Silence fell in the room as Nina resumed mixing the ingredients, and a new feeling began to rise up inside her. It had been a while since they had spent some time alone, and she had started to surrender to the fact that it would never happen again. Yet, there they were. She would’ve liked to say that it was as if they had never been apart, but in truth it was different, now that she wasn’t lying to herself anymore. With the acknowledgment of her feelings, came the awareness that whatever was going on between them wasn’t destined to last, that the end was near, and that every moment they spent together could’ve been the last. And it didn’t feel right.

She had never felt that way about anyone. She didn’t even know she could be capable of it until she met him. He had made her question everything, even herself, and she despised him for it. She despised him for making all her certainties crumble, for taking everything she had ever known and turning it into an undefined mass of doubts, for making her feel things she was sure she could never feel for anyone else.

Nina could feel Tommy’s eyes on her has she put the chocolate cake in the oven, and that alone made her hands shake. Against all logic, his gaze on her was something she both craved and escaped, it made her feel uncovered and… seen. She wasn’t used to being seen.

Closing the oven, she pushed those thoughts away. There was no point in torturing herself over what could not be changed. She checked the time on clock on the wall. Forty minutes.

“I have to clean this mess,” she murmured, more to herself than to Tommy. One look at the disaster around her, and she already regretted her decision. She inhaled deeply as the thunderstorm of emotions she was trying so hard to contain threatened to slip out of her control, but soon tears welled up in her eyes. She turned her head away so that Tommy wouldn’t see them, but it was too late.

“Oi,” he furrowed his eyebrows, getting up from the chair. “What’s wrong, eh?”

Many things were wrong. Her family, Stefano, that. Whatever that was. “I have to clean this mess,” she repeated, her voice cracking.

“It’s alright, I’ll help you,” he said reassuringly, taking a few steps towards her, worry painted all over his face.

Nina shook her head, crossing her arms over her chest. “No, no I can do it. It’s…” she trailed off, the knot in her throat making it difficult to even speak.

Tommy’s heart painfully squeezed in his chest. It was overwhelming, to see the suffering she hid behind her mask of fierceness and wit. It was never about the tiredness, or the lack of sleep, or the fucking dishes. She had things eating at her from the inside. Just like him.

“C’mere,” he gently brought his hands to her face, forcing her to look at him. A few tears fell from her eyes, then others followed, like incessant stream that could no longer be held back. “It’s alright,” he said softly, wiping them away. “It’s alright.”

Nina closed her eyes, letting herself be soothed by Tommy’s deep voice and the tender touch of his rough hands on her skin. His fingers traveled through her soft hair, brushing it away from her tear-stained cheeks, before resting on the sides of her face again. “This pain that you have,” he whispered, “share it with me.”

She brought her hands above his, looking up at him through her lashes. Her thumbs faintly stroked his skin, and he could read a hint of hesitation in her features. But when she guided his hands off her face and took a step back, he was certain that she had closed off again, leaving him outside of her mind.

As though nothing had happened, she started to clean up, and Tommy with her, despite her protests. For a while, the clinking of pots and the rush of water were the only noises that broke the stillness of the kitchen. Then, unexpectedly, Nina started to speak.

“It has been going on since I was fourteen,” she said, scrubbing a bowl. Tommy stayed silent, afraid that she’d change her mind if he even made a sound.

“I was in the..” she broke off, looking for the right word. “…ginnasio. I don’t know what it’s called in English. It’s after elementary school,” she explained. “Girls stop at elementary school, they don’t get a higher education. It’s not like it’s forbidden, but it’s just how things are. So as you can imagine, it caused quite the scandal.”

Tommy grabbed a towel, drying the utensils that Nina washed as he listened.

“It caught Stefano’s attention. He studied at the liceo, which is after the ginnasio. He always came to talk to me, asked me questions. My brothers had already finished school at the time, so he was free to approach me without anyone saying anything.” She paused, taking her time to properly clean the whisk. “It didn’t bother me, at first,” she admitted, and Tommy caught a trace of shame in her tone. “He was good looking, a bit older, and he was fairly nice to me. Most girls in the village were in love with him and his brother. I had no idea about what they did.” She handed him a spoon, keeping her gaze on the sink. “Then one day I saw them beating a man half to death in his own shop cause he hadn’t paid for protection. I didn’t even know what protection was,” a laugh escaped her lips, but there was no humour in it. “I have my way of finding out stuff, and people talk, words spread. And once I learned who he was, I decided that I didn’t want anything to do with him. I thought I just had to be patient, cause he was on his last year of school. He asked me to be his girlfriend, on the last day before summer break, and I said no. I thought he’d leave me alone after that,” her voice lowered. “He didn’t. Even when he finished school, he’d always find the way to come to me, to talk to me. He became insistent, he thought I was being difficult, that I was saying no because I didn’t want to say yes right away.”

Fucking bastard, Tommy thought.

“The more time passed, the more I saw, and learned,” Nina continued, her eyes darkening at some distant memory. “And I found out Stefano and his brother had a habit of dragging girls into their car. I didn’t know what it was that they did to them, back then. But it was scary. I stole my brother’s pocket knife, just in case, and always took it with me.”

Tommy almost felt sick. It was even worse than he had imagined. It had been going on for years, ever since she was a little more than a child. Years, and she had never said anything. A question burned on the tip of his tongue, a question whose answer he feared, but that he needed to ask nonetheless. For the first time since she had started telling the whole story, he spoke. “Did you… did you ever need to use it?”

She fell silent, and for a moment he thought he had screwed up. But then she nodded. “Yes.”

His stomach dropped at her revelation, and he stopped what he was doing to take a look at her. He could read the effort she was making to talk about that on her face.

“I was buying groceries with Agnese, and she had stopped in a shop. He came to me while I was waiting for her, tried to convince me to go with him in his car. I pointed that knife at his throat the moment he tried to grab me.” Her voice had hardened, her eyes burning with the determination he had witnessed so many times. “That scar he has, it’s because of me.”

Tommy exhaled the breath he hadn’t even noticed he was holding. Although enraged, he was relieved that Nina didn’t share the destiny of those girls before her, that she had been able to hold her own. Something really close to pride swelled in his chest.

“Unfortunately, it didn’t make him stop. If anything, it made him worse. The fact that our families do business together didn’t help. Soon he was everywhere. At church, outside my school, he even helped my mum with the groceries. I only had some rest when the war came. His father sent him and his brother to their relatives in New York, so that they wouldn’t fight. I hoped he’d stay there, but he came back. And he started again.”

Having finished to wash the utensils, Nina began to put them back in their place. “Recently, he went to speak with my father. He wants to marry me. That was why he was invited here for lunch.”

Tommy felt the blood freeze in his veins. He had imagined the nature of Stefano’s visits to the Ferrante house, but knowing it for sure was an entirely different thing. The thought of Nina being married to that fucker made him sick to his stomach. “What you just said to me,” he said, “tell your family. They’ll understand.”

Nina shook her head, the shadow of a sad smile growing on her face. “I tried.”

She kept herself busy with the last things that needed tidying up, the topic clearly being a raw nerve. “The first time Stefano followed me home from school I went to my father,” she elaborated, wiping the table. “He asked me if I had, perhaps, done something to… encourage that behaviour. To make him believe that I wanted that kind of attention.”

She finally put down the rag, then she went to wash her hands, dismissing the subject as if it was nothing. But that wasn’t nothing. That was a lot, and she didn’t deserve it. It was no wonder she always acted as if it was just her against the whole world. She had to protect herself for years.

“I’m sorry,” Tommy said truthfully. It was the only sentence he could muster up. What could he possibly say, after what she had told him?

Yet, those words had an effect on Nina. All that time, she had felt like it was somehow her fault, or something she had to get over. But that short sentence, said with so much sincerity, carried a meaning of its own. I’m sorry that happened to you. It was the recognition that something had indeed happened, and that it wasn’t something she had done, but something had been done to her. Maybe she was overthinking that, maybe he had only said the first thing that came to his mind, but she needed to hear it.

After that, she let the conversation drop. She would’ve probably regretted sharing that much in the morning, but for the moment she felt lighter. The burden that had weighed down on her shoulders for so long wasn’t as heavy, now that she wasn’t carrying it alone. And even if it lasted just for one night, even if that weight came crashing down on her again the next day, it was enough.

Ten minutes later or so, she took the cake out of the oven, then covered it with a clean tea towel. It would’ve been fun to explain to her mother where it came from. “It’s late,” she murmured, glancing at Tommy. He was leaning against the table, an indecipherable look on his face. Her gaze was captured by the way the muscles of his shoulders showed through his undershirt, then lingered on his forearms, exposed by his rolled-up sleeves. A warm flush crept up her cheeks, and she found herself taken aback by her own thoughts. She really needed to sleep. And Tommy, who she had kept up with her. A sense of guilt pervaded her. Things weren’t easy for him either, and he needed to rest as well. She cleared her throat, hesitantly getting closer to him. “Thank you,” she whispered, resting her hand on his arm. “For staying.”

Tommy turned to look at her, his body stiffening. That contact was enough to send a chill down his spine. Only the thin material of his undershirt was separating his skin from her fingers, yet her touch burned, awakening all the sensations he had been trying to keep at bay. She was beautiful, and mere inches away from him, and her scent was making his head spin. His eyes drifted to her lips. He still remembered how they tasted, and that only added to his yearning. As though it didn’t belong to him anymore, his hand moved to delicately stroke her cheek, the roughness of his knuckles contrasting with the softness of her skin. Her eyelids fluttered closed as she almost involuntarily leaned closer. With a burning desire clouding his judgment, Tommy tentatively pressed his mouth on hers, testing the waters. When her lips started to move against his, his hand went to cup the back of her head, deepening the kiss. It was different than the first time, when his eagerness was so intense that he couldn’t bring himself to be gentle. He kissed her slowly, delicately, as if she might break in his hands.

Nina did feel like she could break at any moment. Vulnerable, exposed. And the craziest part was that she didn’t mind, not even a bit. Because she felt safe, in his arms. However, once again, reality set over her like a dark mist. She slightly moved away, shaking her head. “We can’t do this, Tommy,” she whispered.

He nodded, closing his eyes shut. They were still close enough for their noses to brush, and the tried to imprint that feeling in his mind, in his soul. “I know,” he rasped.

Neither of them moved for a while. Neither of them wanted to. They had been restraining themselves for so long. But it was too late. Inhaling sharply, Tommy took a step back, and a feeling of coldness engulfed both of them.

Nina paced back and forth in her room, fragments of what had happened less than ten minutes ago in the kitchen playing in her head again and again. It felt as if she had reached a point of no return. She couldn’t lie to herself anymore. She couldn’t go against herself anymore. She wanted him. It didn’t matter how much she tried to convince herself that she didn’t, that she should step aside before it became serious, that she’d forget about him anyway. None of it was true. She had tried so hard to put an end to that, to push him away, but she hadn’t been able to. She felt selfish, and cruel, and a traitor for that. And the worst thing was she didn’t care. In that moment, she didn’t care at all. She wanted to be selfish. She wanted to be cruel. She wanted to be a traitor. For once, she didn’t want to think about anyone but herself.

Fuck it, she thought. She walked out of her room, her pulse racing. It wasn’t fear, she wasn’t scared of being caught. With her parents’ chamber being in the other corridor and her brothers being away on business, no one would see her entering Tommy’s room. It was the anticipation for something she couldn’t quite put her finger on. She stopped in front of the door, pondering whether to knock, just open it, or simply leave, feeling her courage already slip away from her. What if he didn’t want to see her? What if he was already asleep?

Determined not to let the whirlwind of thoughts and panic scare her out of it, she brought her fist to the wooden surface. The seconds stretched into an eternity as she waited, nervously fidgeting with her fingers, and when the sound of his footsteps came to her ears, she thought her heart could jump right out of her chest. Tommy opened the door, confusion painted across his features, but before he could say anything, Nina pulled him in and crashed her lips against his. It didn’t take much for him to recover from the surprise and wrap a strong arm around her waist, pulling her inside as he closed the door with his free hand. She found herself trapped against the hard surface, enveloped by the warmth radiating from him as their bodies pressed together. Her hands slid behind his neck, bringing him impossibly closer, eager to feel more. The feeling of his strong frame all over her made her knees buckle, and she was pretty sure she would’ve ended up on the floor hadn’t he been holding her. His smell, which had become now so familiar to her - a mixture of soap and cigarette smoke, with a hint of whiskey-, invaded her nostrils, making her head spin.

His hands roamed down her body, covered by the cotton nightgown. He gripped at the soft material, feeling the last shred of his self control drift away from him. It was too much. She was too much. God knew how much he wanted her, but he didn’t want her to do something she was going to regret. Once they had crossed that line, they couldn’t go back. “Nina,” he groaned, breaking away from her. “We have to stop now. I have to stop now.”

“Don’t.”

In the dim light of the room, Tommy examined her expression, only to see there was not a trace of doubt in her eyes. He gulped, gently stroking her cheek. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

He leaned with his forehead against hers, rubbing his thumb on the skin of her jaw. “Tell me to stop and I’ll stop,” he husked. “At any moment.”

She nodded, but when he leaned in to kiss her again, she put her hands on his chest. “Wait,” she blurted out, causing him to take a step back. “I’ve never…” Nina didn’t finish her sentence, but she didn’t need to.

Shit. Tommy had imagined it, of course, he was no fool, but having it confirmed… He shouldn’t. He really shouldn’t. But there was a part of him that didn’t care at all. The bad he couldn’t help.

“Do you want me to stop?”

Nina pondered her answer, the reality of the situation washing over her. Theoretically, she knew what to expect. Practically, it was a whole different thing. And she knew that if she said yes, she’d be ruined. Still, she didn’t care. And she was hit by the overwhelming awareness that she’d let him do whatever he wanted to her. “No,” she breathed out.

She felt like she could melt right there when he raised her chin to capture her lips again. What started as a tender kiss became more heated, and soon he was basically devouring her, unable to restrain himself any longer.

Tommy had thought about that moment more than he’d ever admit, and now that she was actually there in his arms, it almost felt unreal. Yet she was there, and she was trusting him. And as he grabbed her waist to press her against him, he noticed his own hands were shaking.

Nina tilted her head as he started to leave a trail of kisses down her neck. A gasp escaped her lips when he reached a particularly sensitive spot, and an unfamiliar ache spread between her tighs, causing her to unconsciously rub them together. Her reaction didn’t go unnoticed, cause she felt his lips twisting in a grin against her skin. He moved down to her collarbones, then perilously close to her breasts. His fingers travelled up to the straps of her nightgown as he pulled back slightly, a silent question in his eyes. When she nodded, he slowly slid them down her shoulders, uncovering her inch after inch, until she was standing in front of him with nothing on but her knickers.

Her heart raced as she saw desire burning in Tommy’s eyes. Except it wasn’t just desire, or lust. There was something more, something she couldn’t read. No one had ever looked at her that way. With trembling hands, she shyly took ahold of the hem of his undershirt. Her fingers brushed against his skin as she raised it, leaving behind a trail of goosebumps and making his muscles twitch. Once the clothing was lying on the on the floor, she allowed herself to look at him, and explore him. She delicately traced the bullet scar on his shoulder, as if she might hurt him by pressing too hard, then the tattoo on his chest, then the lines of his abdomen, everything that told the story of his life. It was like watching a masterpiece. A torn, tainted masterpiece, but a masterpiece nonetheless.

Her hands reached his trousers, but she raised her gaze on him before unbuttoning them. A glimpse of something that looked a lot like surprise crossed his face, almost as though he wasn’t expecting her to ask. Then he gave her a single nod. After helping her remove them, he gently guided her towards the bed.

A mixture of edginess and anticipation took over Nina as Tommy positioned himself on top of her, one hand beside her head to support himself, the other ghosting over her breasts. She arched her back as he ran his thumb over one of her hardened nipples, the new, strange sensation becoming more and more pleasant as he fondled her flesh. He leaned down to pepper her chest with kisses, his lips warm and soft, then he trailed down to her stomach, her ribs, her belly. That new attention had her squirming under him, eliciting a deep chuckle from Tommy that caused her face to flush. His lips travelled up again to meet hers in a slow, sensual kiss that fogged her brain so much that she almost didn’t notice his hand making its way down to her most private parts. Breath hitched in her throat as he ran his fingers over her clothed sex.

“Do you trust me?” he asked her, his voice reverberating in her own chest. He raised his head to look at her, studying her expression.

Nina’s hand found its place on the back of his head, the short locks tickling her palm. She didn’t even need to think about her answer. One look at his face and she knew. She did trust him, with all her heart. She pulled him down to press a tender kiss on his mouth. “Yes,” she whispered.

Still close enough for their lips to brush, Tommy delicately rubbed his fingers over her heat, stimulating the area while allowing her to get used to the sensation of being touched. When his fingertip found her clit, she let out an involuntary gasp, her fingers tightening around the nape of his neck. He then pushed her knickers to the side, caressing the wet folds before stopping at her opening. Slowly, he inserted one of his digits, and she winced at the foreign, mildly uncomfortable feeling. Tommy stilled his movements, giving her the time to get adjusted.

“Is this alright?”

“Yes,” she breathed out.

He began to pump his finger in and out, careful not to go too deep just yet. Nina let out a ragged breath, pleasure building up inside her as she gradually got used to the feeling. His thumb rolled over her clit, the unexpected move eliciting a whimper out of her. Her breathing became more laboured as he added another finger, stretching her further.

Tommy took in the sight of her under him, eyes closed, swollen lips parted, her eyebrows slightly furrowed in a frown. God, she was beautiful. And she was his, even if just for one night. He moved faster and deeper, working her open until he felt it was enough. A whine of protest left her lips when he removed his fingers, and he smirked at the reaction. “Be patient,” he playfully scolded her, earning himself a glare.

He got rid her now inconvenient last piece of clothing, then took off his briefs. Nina couldn’t help but let her gaze wander to the newly exposed part, and a wave of concern overcame her. It couldn’t possibly fit.

Tommy gently parted her legs more to settle between them and hovered above her again, but he must’ve read the apprehension on her face. “Do you want to stop?” he murmured, running his knuckles over her cheek.

His attentiveness warmed Nina’s heart, dissolving any fear she had. She was safe with him. He wouldn’t hurt her. “No,” she shook her head.

He cradled her head in one of his hands and leaned in to place a sweet kiss on her forehead, then lined himself up with her entrance. Nina braced herself for what was to come, her fingers ghosting over his shoulders in a soothing motion. Tommy inserted his tip, and she couldn’t hold back a stifled gasp at the intrusion. He stood still for a moment, reassuringly rubbing her waist with a hand, then pushed a bit further inside her tight slit. Nina squeezed her eyes shut, the burning sensation almost unbearable.

“You alright?” he asked, the effort he was making to restrain himself showing through the rasp of his voice. Her velvety walls were squeezing him in the most delightful way, and it took all his self-control to stop there.

She nodded, silently giving him the permission to go on. Pain and pleasure mixed as he carefully worked his way past her resistance, until he was buried deep inside of her. He stilled again, giving her the time to adjust to his size. That feeling of fullness took her breath away, it was intoxicating. He was intoxicating. She pulled him impossibly close, eager to feel every inch of his skin on her skin, to melt into him until she could no longer tell where she started and he ended. A low groan reverberated into her ear as she pushed her hips up against his, encouraging him to move. Tommy started rolling his hips, setting a slow, sensual pace that allowed both of them to feel everything with the outmost depth. His lips claimed hers in a searing kiss, stifling the moans that threatened to escape them. Nina’s hands went to cup his face, the softness of his lips enough to distract her from the last shreds of pain and help her relax, thus allowing him to go even deeper. His teeth grazed her bottom lip, further igniting the fire inside of her.

So that was what Nina had been warned about all her life. That was the sin she had been taught she should avoid at all costs, the sin that would bring shame and ignominy upon her and all her family. And she was surprised to find out that it didn’t feel like a sin. It didn’t feel wrong. How could there be shame in that, when it felt so right? How could there be shame in being in the arms of someone she cared so deeply about, who made her feel so safe? Where was the shame?

Tommy’s hands rested on the back her thighs, fingers squeezing the flesh as he felt her tightening around him. He wanted to take it slow, to savour that moment, but it was getting harder and harder as her warmth, her scent, her shaky breaths clouded his senses. It felt like being in a bubble. Nothing else mattered, nothing else was real. Time had stopped for them to exist in that moment.

Nina hid her face in the crook of his neck as he quickened his pace, feeling her muscles tightening in her lower stomach. Tommy guided her to wrap her legs around him, the new angle making her see stars. His thrusts became more erratic, more frantic, causing that strange feeling in her abdomen to become even stronger. “Tommy,” she whimpered, overwhelmed by that vortex of sensations.

“Let it happen, love,” he whispered in her ear, his length twitching at the way his name sounded on her lips.

With a few more thrusts, he pushed her over the edge, and she had to press her mouth over his shoulder to silence the sounds she couldn’t hold back anymore. It didn’t take long for Tommy to follow her, his hips jerking as he spilled himself inside of her.

The world stood still as they stayed in each other’s embrace, Tommy’s cheek brushing against hers. He buried his nose in her dark hair, inhaling her lavender scent. For once, his head was silent. No nagging thoughts, no shovels against the wall. Just peace.

Nina gently stroked the back of his head, breathing deeply as her heart slowed down to a normal rate. Fuck, she had never felt anything like that. It had been… intense. And it had tied her to him more than she could’ve ever imagined. It was scary, to be so connected to someone. To feel someone that much. That was the right expression. She felt him. As if he were part of herself. As if there had been an empty spot inside her soul, and she had lived with it all her life, only to find that it was him the missing piece.

A sudden blast of cold hit her when Tommy got up, depriving her of his warmth and weight. She watched in confusion as he disappeared in his private bathroom, wondering whether something had happened. She sat up on the bed, bringing her knees to her chest. Had she done something wrong?

However, she didn’t need to worry for long, cause soon Tommy walked back into the room, with his private parts now covered by a pair of briefs and a fresh towel in his hand. Without saying a word, he climbed back on the bed, smiling softly at the puzzled look on her face. Slightly embarrassed now that the disinhibition brought by the feverish state they had previously been in had faded, she felt her cheeks grow hot when he gently spread her legs apart. He delicately ran the towel over her sensitive skin, cleaning her up from the sticky mess between her legs, his eyebrows knitted in a concentrated frown. Once again, his attentiveness made her heart skip a bit, and she was amazed by how easy it was to let him take care of her. She never let anybody take care of her.

As Tommy discarded the towel somewhere on the floor, Nina’s attention was caught by the blood stain on the white top sheet. Shit. She got up to remove it from the bed, doing her best to ignore what she’d prefer would stay tomorrow’s problem. “I’ll have to take care of it in the morning,” she murmured.

Tommy laid on the bed again, then reached for the cigarettes on his nightstand to light one. He watched her as she looked for her nightgown among the mess of clothes on the floor, naked, with only her long, ruffled hair to cover her a little. She was quite the sight.

Much to his dismay, she soon found what she was looking for, and covered herself. He exhaled a cloud of smoke, motioning for her to get back in bed, having had enough of having her away from him. “C’mere.”

Nina gladly took her place back next to him, resting with her head on his chest as he draped an arm over her shoulders. She could’ve stayed there forever. But she knew that it wouldn’t be long before the sun made its appearance on the horizon.

They stayed in silence as Tommy smoked his cigarette, his fingertips mindlessly grazing her arm. He didn’t want to think about tomorrow, or about what would happen next. He wanted to stay in that moment while he still could, because he knew he wouldn’t get it back. That thought stung. But he was aware they needed to have that conversation. This time they couldn’t just pretend nothing had happened, and the sooner they talked, the sooner they would clear things out.

“Nina,” he whispered, but no reaction came from her. She had fallen asleep.

Tommy stubbed his cigarette in the ashtray, then turned the small lamp off. He didn’t have the heart to wake her up.

They would think about it tomorrow.

NEXT CHAPTER

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General Acacius x Isekai! Reader x emperor Geta

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Get into the movie?What a joke Part 5

After receiving the letter, you had to prepare urgently: buy new clothes, jewelry, arrange documents and assemble servants. Everyone was in a hurry, trying to do everything as quickly as possible and not embarrass themselves in front of the emperors, as it happened before. But to be honest, you were indifferent to all this. What difference does it make if you lose your job or not? You will still live in prosperity until (hopefully) you return to your time.

However, you gradually realized that losing job at the royal court was the height of humiliation. It's worse than divorce for a woman. Such a loss would have marked you as a "worthless Roman." In secular circles, not only the origin was appreciated, but also the position held. High status and good relationships provided protection from accusations. To dare to question you would be to defy the Emperor himself, and that would be a punishment. That's why most people preferred to keep quiet, even if you made mistakes.

Your position was protected on both sides. Your father, Flavius Cornelian, was a respected man who defended Rome. His power and money allowed him to protect your honor. The emperors' protection was also universal. Despite their personal animosity, you were still accepted out of respect for your father.

But it was a fragile defense. If one barrier collapsed, the others would collapse after it. Without the imperial support, people would have quickly untied their hands. The opinion of others and your father's reputation could only save you temporarily. In the eyes of society, you would become a stain that cannot be ignored.

Flavnia had calculated everything well. She was an intelligent woman, and it was not for nothing that the best teachers taught her from an early age. Her world, built cunningly and prudently, was held together by thin threads. If they are not reinforced, everything will collapse sooner or later. That's why you had to go, even if you didn't want to at all.

The immediate plan of action included several points:

1. Don't get married.

2. Save your job.

3. Sever ties with those who overshadow the status.

4. Stop any corrupt activity.

5. Stay away from the emperors (whenever possible).

The hardest part was getting rid of unnecessary connections. Of course, you could have asked your father for help... but the idea immediately seemed idiotic. It would be much better to collect evidence against these people, frame them, and then say, "I was only pretending to be corrupt in order to expose the real ones." Although this plan seemed too simple, it clearly had pitfalls.

"If I try to expose them, rumors are inevitable," you muttered to yourself, sitting at the dressing table.

Your reflection in the mirror was like someone else's. Golden curls fell to her shoulders, sparkling as if they had been woven by the gods. Her pale skin resembled snow-white alabaster, polished to a high gloss. Eyes as deep as a pool, as if someone were being dragged into the abyss and would not let go, captivating eternity. You were beautiful-too beautiful to be ignored. The slight carelessness in your gaze, as if you were about to sink into a sweet dream, made you look like a character from ancient myths

(I drew this with particular difficulty)

You sighed. No, it's not your face. It was never yours. You didn't want to get used to it. After all, sooner or later you will come back. Isn't that right?..

Flavnia's mother died in childbirth, and for her father, Cornelian, she became the most important person in her life. He pampered her, as if trying to numb his own pain. But something went wrong. Flavia's upbringing had unexpected results: at some point, she became cold and distant. These memories came back to you in fragments, like paintings through a fog.

There was a feeling that sixteen-year-old Flavnia harbored a burning hatred for everything that moved. Her only consolation was the flowers her mother had planted in the garden. It seems that this is why she became friends with the gardener... "That's why he wasn't surprised by my kindness," you thought, picking up a hair clip. After carefully securing it, you took another look in the mirror.

Flavnia's life turned out to be difficult, as well as her attempts to understand this world. She tried, but every time she faced a harsh reality. Memories of the past appeared more and more often, but they were still too blurry to put together a complete picture.

You turned around when the door creaked and Cornelian entered the room. A faint smile lit up his face.

"I don't want to let you go there,- he said, coming closer. His hands rested on your shoulders, stroked the top of your head, the gesture was simple but full of warmth. "But since you want to go back to work so badly, I won't try to persuade you." A job is a job.

"Everything will be fine, I'll try not to get into trouble anymore, Father," you replied with a slight smile, looking at him. Cornelian reminded you , your father from a previous life, who died of old age. He had lived a long, full life, but thinking about him still made you sad.

-No, I know you're not looking for trouble. They're the ones who find you... Anyway, I know who's behind it. If you want, I'll..." he began, but you held up your hand, stopping him in mid-sentence.

"Even if you get rid of this man, the rumors won't go away," you interrupted with a sigh. - It's too late to bring him to justice. We need to act differently, find those who are behind it.

Cornelian listened attentively to you, but his eyes remained worried. You took a lock of hair, gently twirled it around your finger and smiled. A name popped up in your memory.

- Marcia... - you said it barely audibly, but your father understood everything.

The emperor's third concubine, Marcia, was quite an influential woman. There was always a rivalry between her and Flavnia. Both are from noble families, both are well educated. But their paths diverged: one decided to become a queen, the other - to serve the empire. Marcia has always wanted to get rid of Plautia, because some senators wanted you to be empress.

Cornelian frowned, but then he smiled.

- Your ideas have always been much more practical than mine. I'm used to acting fast and tough, but you're right. Be careful, daughter," he said, adjusting the scarlet cape on your shoulders.

You watched him walk out of the room, leaving you alone. The last time you looked in the mirror, you were convinced that everything was perfect. Your sly smile touched your lips.

"Well, it's time to declare yourself to the empire," you whispered, ready for a new challenge.

---

The carriage moved cautiously along the Roman roads. My back ached from sitting for a long time, but I had no choice: ancient Rome was not generous with comfort. When the traffic stopped, you counted to ten to catch your breath and collect your thoughts.

The servants of the Imperial Palace were waiting for you outside the carriage. They respectfully bowed their heads, opened the door and gave you their hand. You got off the carriage, ignored their politeness, and took the first step. Your movements were fast, and your cloak was fluttering in the wind.

Passing by the tall columns, you felt a strange feeling - a mixture of deja vu and anxiety. It was all familiar to your memory, but it seemed alien.

When you entered the palace, you stopped at the doors, which the guards opened in front of you. Your posture, the confidence in your gait, the cold look in your eyes-all this screamed about your inaccessibility.

- Mrs. Flavnia Plautia has arrived at the post! One of the guards announced.

Silence reigned in the meeting room.

Two emperors, Geta and Caracalla, sat on the throne. One of them, the eldest, crossed his legs while the woman whispered something in his ear. Geta did not move an eyebrow, only coldly watching what was happening.

The youngest, Caracalla, was playing with a monkey with curiosity. He didn't seem interested in your presence at all.

You glanced at them briefly, just nodding your head slightly in greeting.

"I was already elated at the thought that your absence would save me from unnecessary worries," Geta began with a sneer. His voice echoed off the marble walls. - But, alas, I still see you here.

You met his gaze without flinching.

"No matter how sad my presence makes you, I'm afraid you'll have to get used to it. Fate decreed otherwise," you replied calmly, maintaining confidence in your voice.

Some of the courtiers flinched at your words, not expecting such an audacious response.

-Alas, I lack the pleasure of showing my distress as clearly as you do," the emperor retorted, his fingers gripping the armrest of the throne.

You noticed his reaction, but your smile remained unchanged.

The silence in the hall seemed to be becoming unbearable. The stares of the courtiers burned through you like scorched coals. Geta continued to watch in silence, his gaze heavy, almost tired, but there was tension under that mask. He stood up slowly, tugging at the dark fabric of his cape, and took a few steps forward.

"Flavnia," he said at last, with the care with which a man touches a long-forgotten wound. - Your appearance here raises only one question for me. Why did you come back?

His words were cold, but there was no open threat in them. Rather, it resembled the conversation of a man who is trying to figure out what kind of power is in front of him.

"I think it's obvious, Your Majesty," you replied, lifting your chin slightly. "My duty is to serve Rome. And that's why I came back.

Geta narrowed his eyes, his face remained unreadable. Several courtiers exchanged glances, and one of them quietly whispered something to his neighbor.

-Service," he repeated slowly, as if trying the word out. And yet... What are you willing to give for this service? Or maybe you've come just to remind us of your importance again?

Those words almost sounded like an accusation, but you didn't flinch.

"Rome deserves more than empty words, Your Majesty. I'm here to prove it with my deeds, not with conversations.

You saw his eyebrow twitch slightly, but otherwise he remained motionless. His answering gaze was cold, as if his mind was probing every letter in your words, looking for a weak spot.

_________

There may be mistakes in the text, because my English is not perfect, some places were not edited by me, because all this time I was studying at the university

[emluvsuxo]

MON CHERI

- MINORS DNI -

a/n: its official ml’s im posting xx please read the warnings

word count: 871 

warnings: smut, exhibitionism ( sort of ), praise, obsessed!nic, famous!reader, nic speaks a bit of french, blowjob, let me know if I missed any ;)

As you and Nicholas stepped out onto the red carpet, all eyes turned to the both of you with Nicholas's hand snaking protectively around your waist as questions were shouted forcefully towards you.

“y/n can we get a spin!?” a paparazzi yelled. Nicholas’ hand moved swiftly from your waist to your hand and spun you slowly leaning in for a kiss. He tends to feel overprotective at these events wanting to make sure EVERYONE knows you belong to him and him only. 

Following the red carpet everyone was swiftly moved to the dinner room with round tables covered in white lace tablecloths and wine glasses tied with silk black ribbon that perfectly matches your dress and nicholas’ tie. “ A drink mon cheri?” Nicholas whispered. “ Sauv blanc ,mon amour” you teased. 

Time passed as dinner was served and before you knew it a rough hand was resting on your thigh. It was inevitable that this would happen as it always does, especially at these types of events, when you don't give Nic as much attention as usual. “ y/n, is it almost time to go home?” he shook. You ignored the man's pleas and continued the conversation across the table with another guest. You felt his patience withering thin, pushing his limits. “ I'm sorry excuse us” he spoke up before grabbing your hand and dragging you out of your chair. “ nic! Let me go.” you muttered. He continued before you were both in a dim lighted hallway. Where only the orange shadow from the lights was casting over the two of you. Nic pulled you in by your waist, smashing his lips to his own fighting for dominance with his tongue. 

I mean how could you refuse the man infront of you, “ fuck princess the things this dress does to me” tracing his hands over the silk on your figure,breathless. “nic , not here we could be caught” you pull away fighting for a breath. But that didn't stop him as the kiss deepens, his hands travelled up to your breasts squeezing with slight pressure. His mouth swallowed any sounds that escaped your delicate lips. “You feel this” As he dragged your hand down towards the tent in his dress pants. “ That's what you do to me, i cant even last one night without you princess” he pleaded. He continued to reach down to your thighs slipping his hands beneath you dress pulling the silk up onto your hips and hooking two fingers into your panties moving them to the side. soaked. “ this wet, all for me?” you looked up at him nodding “ you want me mon cheri?” he asked. Again you nod. “Words”. “ Yes, please, I need you, I'm desperate.” He smirked. “ good girl”.

He was strong, his grip tightening on your waist, making your insides stirr. The way his plump lips travelled over your soft skin, and the raw need in his eyes. But you couldn't stop yourself from leaning in closer as his hands gripped firmer not far from bruising. You were so entwined in the situation you didn't even realise your hands had found his chest gripping onto his crisp white dress shirt. Swiftly, he turned you around pushing you against the cold brick wall as he travelled his hand down the curve of your waist to your ass giving it a light squeeze, gathering the smooth silk covering you. Hastily he tore your shortly lived lace panties, gasping at the noise. “ dont stress, I'll buy as many as you want” he chuckled. You could basically feel the smirk as he stuffed them into his pocket. 

“ y/n, tell me you want this, tell me that you're mine.” he paused. “ I'm all yours my love” you smiled cheekily. Before hearing a rushed zip followed by a deep exhale from nicholas. Less than 5 seconds passed before you felt him enter you with a harsh thrust. As breathy moans escaped your glossed lips he reached his hand around to your mouth clasping it over your mouth. “ shh, remember we don't want us getting caught now do we?” he said, you could hear the strain in his voice. “ holy shit baby, i could fuck this pussy all day if youd let me” speeding his pace up just enough to feel him pressing against your cervix. You could feel the pit of heat rising in your stomach knowing you definitely were not lasting long. Nicholas let out strained groans as he felt you tighten around him. “ Do that again and I won't be able to pull out.” His harsh thrusts continued steadily until you chased your release feeling a blur come over you arching your back as your eyes rolled to the back of your head. 

“good girl” nic chuckled watching you overcome your release as he was close to follow. He gripped your waist spinning you around. “On your knees princess,” he said. You followed his commands falling to your knees looking up at him with glassy eyes and a fucked out expression. Knowingly you wrapped your hands delicately around his length slowly moving your hands up around chasing his orgasm. Leaning in you licked his tip teasingly watching how his head rolled back exposing his adams apple followed by a deep groan “ fuck im gonna come, open your mouth” he demanded. And you sat there mouth open, awaiting his release on your tongue. He let out a last moan as he finished. 

“Round 2 at home?”

THE END

Ik its not very long but i am just starting hehe. I hope you enjoyed and please leave recommendations im open to anything!

lots of love em x

tags ( lmk if u want to be removed im just trying to get things going ) @hoffmansgirl @badomensgoodomens @blackynsupremacy @nicholaslut @motherismotheringggg @greengoblinswifey

[georgeweasleyslostearhq]

MOVIES, KISSES, AND BIRTHDAY CAKE

Pairings: Eddie Munson x fem! Summary: a few days into being the new 'freak' in school, you come to find out the truth. Though, Eddie doesn't seem to like that truth. Warnings: none. A/N: IN HONOUR FOR THE WONDERFUL JOSEPH'S BIRTHDAY! AHH.

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The bell chimed above you as you walked through the glass door of family video.

Your eyes scanned the store, looking for Robin, perhaps, you weren't entirely sure, because you knew where the movie you were here for was.

You wouldn't expect many people on a Wednesday afternoon at 5pm.

So, for you to be the only person in the store is probably why there were no workers at the front.

You walked to the left to the romance section, looking at the sea of bright colours of all the lined-up VHS tapes.

You picked up Sixteen Candles and looked around again when you walked up to the counter.

The doorbell rang behind you and you turned, seeing a teen around your age look at you and frown before going to the Horror section.

You had gotten used to these looks over the past week, the party being almost 2 weeks ago.

The first day or two you had sat by yourself, finding yourself with no friends before you decided to embrace being the new freak in school.

So, you took Eddie up on his offer, finding a seat on the Hellfire table.

The rest of the club were skeptical about you at first, Though Eddie made sure they made you feel welcome after the next lunch break.

It was awkward at first, being friends with a bunch of guys, one being someone that you found yourself thinking about way too often.

After Monday, 2 days after the party where you had a go at Eddie for the spread rumour, you hadn't brought it up again, afraid that it would cause more damage than good, and seen as though you found yourself in his friend group, and that he took you in, you figured you should keep him happy so at least you'd have friends for the next few months before you graduate.

Steve had entered the store from the back, smiling as he saw you.

"Well, if it isn't miss party rocker" He smiled, typing onto the computer

You frowned, tilting your head, looking behind you to make sure he's talking to you. When you realise, he is you look back at him, still confused

"I'm sorry?" you raised your eyebrows, leaning on the counter

"Lewenski's party? you were going pretty hard that night" he chuckles, scanning your VHS tape.

Your face visibly relaxed when you realised, he might have heard that rumour...or-

"You were there?" you questioned, leaning closer

He nodded his head, placing the tape down with a smile

"Yeah, mostly in the backyard smoking, but yeah"

You opened your mouth, wanting to say so many things, but he cut you off

"You were pretty drunk, so I don't expect you to remember bumping into me, literally, but y'know. didn't take you as the one to get high with the town freak" Steve tapped the desk, shrugging

you looked around, not seeing the boy that came in a minute ago, he's probably going to the 18 plus section, behind the curtain, which is why you leaned away, shifting on your feet.

"You didn't happen to see me with Eddie that night, did you?" you asked, really hoping that Steve had the answers you needed to hear

He nodded again "yeah, you were with him for a while outside, who did you think you got high with?"

You raised your eyebrows again, trying to hide your smile.

He went to say something when you cut him off, hurriedly talking

"-didyouseemeandeddiemakingout?" you huffed

He tilted his head, his eyes widened, and he let out a chuckle "what was that?"

You sighed "did you see me and Eddie making out at any point of the night?"

he shook his head, his lips in a thin line as he thought about your question "no"

Steve was so confused, now that he was out of high school, the only way he got gossip about that stuff was through the kids- mostly Dustin.

Which is mostly why Steve went to the party, to feel like he once did in school, to get himself in the inside scoop of what was Hawkins high.

He had no memory of you two kissing or making out, and he would never peg you as the type to go after Eddie Munson

"I wasn't exactly watching you or anything- but actually" he swallowed, his fingers pausing the tapping as he looked at you weirdly.

This was it, the answers to your questions, the truth behind why you were a freak.

"I did see you go in to kiss him, though, but he stopped you- probably because he wasn't drunk" he nodded "but you seemed pretty upset about it, actually, stormed away, if I remember correctly"

You felt a weight on your shoulder lift, and you closed your eyes in relief, this was such good news, you never made out with Eddie.

You weren't a freak.

But deep down, you knew it was too late, nothing you could do or say would make any difference, you were a freak.

It was just nice to know the truth, even if no one else would care for it.

But as much as you were happy, you were embarrassed that even drunk you wanted to kiss Eddie stupid.

At this point you thought you were sick, a little under the weather because why would you want to kiss Eddie Munson so much you want to when you're drunk?

You'd have enough of it.

You quickly paid for the tape and rushed out of the store, going over to Eddie's trailer.

You'd never been there before, and you don't think he knew you knew which trailer he lived in.

You had only known about it when visiting Max one night, seeing him pull up with deafening loud music blasting.

So, you drove to Eddie's, planning to tell him the truth, thinking he'd be happy knowing it just as much as you are.

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You walked up the creaky steps to Eddie's trailer, unsure of what to expect, but you were determined to share the good news. You were almost giddy with the thought that you hadn’t actually made out with Eddie at the party. It was a small victory, but it was something you needed to share with him.

You knocked on the door, nervously shifting on your feet. It was then that the door swung open, revealing Eddie, looking somewhat surprised to see you standing there.

"Oh...hey" He smiled brightly

"Hi" you beamed

"Out of all the club, I would've expected Dustin to show up for my Birthday, not you" He shook his head, looking behind you

You frowned, trying to rack your brain

"Come in, I just ordered a pizza, so I hope you like pepperoni, if you want cake you'll have to wait until 11... That's when Wayne gets back from the plant so...Though... I uh- I don't expect you to stay that long..."

You stepped through the door when he moved out of the way.

You were so confused, until you remembered a few days ago it was briefly mentioned when you were too busy staring at his lips.

It's weird how you got so defensive and upset about the thought of you two making out, when all you want to do a lot of the day when you're with him is kiss him.

"Oh" you chuckled dryly, looking around the trailer that was his home "yeah, happy birthday!" you smiled

He grinned "thanks, sweetheart"

You blushed, feeling nervous and a little guilty as he guided you to sit on the couch

"Want some of the good stuff?" he said, walking down the hall

"Sure, I uh- I have a movie in the car if you want me to get it?" you nodded, getting up when he laughed

"Is it some cheesy romance?" he asked, peeking his head out of his room, a wide smile on his face, dimples on show as his hair hangs.

You shake your head, trying to suppress your smile, knowing you're lying.

He rolls his eyes, groaning "fine-UH" he said, dragging out the syllable

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"Sorry! No, no way," Eddie shook his head quickly, waving a dismissive hand and grabbing the remote to pause the screen just as Sam and Jake leaned in to kiss.

The frozen frame captured the couple mid-embrace, the soft glow of the TV light flickering against Eddie's disapproving expression. a greasy pizza box on the floor crimpling as he moved his foot to kick it away.

"They’re just kissing," you scoffed, furrowing your eyebrows as you leaned back against the couch. The worn fabric pressed into your shoulder blades, and you crossed your arms, giving him a pointed look.

"Yeah," he huffed, almost indignantly, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. "I don’t want to see it."

"Oh, you’re just salty that you’re twenty and still a virgin to everything," you teased, throwing an exaggerated grin his way as you sank further into the cushions. “And besides, you’re lucky this is the ending scene.”

Eddie’s eyes narrowed, his lips twisting into a scowl. “Excuse me? No! And to what I’ve heard, we’ve made out, so I’m not a virgin to that, am I?”

He leaned back into the couch, crossing his arms in defiance as his gaze flickered to the TV, clearly trying to act unaffected.

You couldn’t help but smile, finding his irritation oddly endearing. “Oh yeah! No- I totally forgot- which is weird because it’s literally what I came here to tell you. We didn’t make out!”

Eddie’s frown deepened, and he leaned away from you, his brows knitting together.

He licked his lips, his gaze drifting to the side as he processed your words. “Did we think we did?”

You tilted your head, watching his confusion with a small shake of your head. “Well... for a second, I thought maybe we did... but I found out from Steve-”

That set him off. Eddie snapped his head back to you, his dark eyes glaring. He shot up from the couch in one fluid motion, pacing a few steps before spinning on his heel to face you.

“Oh, Steve? How does he know anything?” His voice was sharp, almost accusing, as he ran a hand through his perpetually messy hair, his rings catching the dim light of the room.

“W-well, I went by Family Video,” you stammered, sitting up straighter. “And he was working, and he was at the party, so I asked him, and he said we didn’t, so- that’s- that’s why I came here... to tell you!”

You didn’t understand why Eddie seemed upset. His shoulders were tense, his jaw set, but the news felt like a relief to you. So why didn’t he feel the same way? You kept the smile on your face, trying to hold on to that positivity.

Eddie turned to you, his expression unreadable as he glared at you, his voice suddenly quieter but no less biting. “I thought you came here for my birthday?”

The words hit you like a weight to the chest. You blinked, your mouth opening as if to explain, but the guilt tangled your tongue.

“You didn’t even remember, did you?” he mumbled, his face dropping as he shook his head, almost laughing in disbelief.

“Eddie, no-I-I did! I just-” You sighed, searching for the words. “I thought this was good news.”

Eddie’s laugh was humorless, and he threw his hands in the air as he walked dramatically across the room. His steps were heavy, the floor creaking under his boots. “Good news? That what, turns out you aren’t a freak so you can throw my name under the bus and get your friends back?!”

“What?!” you shot back, standing up now, your voice rising with frustration. “What are you talking about, Eddie?”

He closed the distance between you in three quick strides, leaning down so his face was inches from yours, his finger pointing accusingly.

“I bet you’re happy, though, huh? That you didn’t kiss a freak, right?”

His words stung, and for a moment, you froze, your thoughts spinning back to what Steve told you at the video store. You remembered him saying you’d leaned in to kiss Eddie, and Eddie had stopped you. Eddie wasn’t drunk that night, so...

“How do you not remember that night?” you murmured, the words spilling out before you could stop them.

Eddie’s glare didn’t falter, but his confusion was evident in the furrow of his brow. “Huh?”

“Steve told me he saw me lean in to kiss you, b-but you pushed me away because you weren’t drunk... if you weren’t drunk, how do you not remember that night?” you asked, your voice softer now as you shifted uncomfortably under his gaze.

His expression faltered for a split second, a flicker of guilt crossing his face before he frowned again. He closed his eyes, running a hand down his face. “I-I don’t know what to tell you... I don’t remember... I must have gotten drunk afterward,” he said, his voice quieter, almost unsure.

You licked your lips, your throat suddenly dry as you looked away. “Why aren’t you happy? That we didn’t kiss? I thought...” You shrugged, your voice trailing off. “I just thought maybe it would be nice to know.”

Eddie laughed then, a low, bitter sound that didn’t reach his eyes. He looked down at the ground, his dimples deepening with the ghost of a smile that felt forced and hollow.

Eddie’s laughter faded, and the room fell uncomfortably silent. He rubbed the back of his neck, his head tilted down as if he couldn’t bear to look at you. When he finally spoke, his voice came out sharper than he intended.

“Why would it be nice to know?” he snapped, his dark eyes meeting yours, his tone biting with frustration. “Why would it be so great to find out that the girl I like didn’t end up kissing me?”

The words hung in the air like a firework that had exploded too close, the weight of his confession pressing down on both of you. Eddie froze, his mouth still slightly open as if he couldn’t believe what had just come out. His chest rose and fell as he stared at you, wide-eyed, his anger dissolving into sheer panic.

Your jaw dropped, your confusion only deepening as you tried to process what he’d just said. “What?” you managed to whisper, your voice barely audible.

“I-” Eddie started, but his voice cracked. He looked away, pacing a few steps toward the window, one hand tugging at his hair. He muttered something under his breath that you couldn’t catch, but the tips of his ears were red, and he looked like he wanted to melt into the floor.

“I didn’t mean to say that” he blurted, turning back to you. His hands gestured wildly as if trying to claw the words back out of the air. “I didn’t mean- it just slipped out, okay? Forget I said anything.”

But you couldn’t forget. Not when his words were echoing in your head on a loop: the girl I like.

“You...” You blinked, your heart racing as you took a hesitant step toward him. “You like me?”

Eddie let out a short, humourless laugh, shaking his head. “No- wait, yes, but not- Jesus, this is so stupid.” He groaned, covering his face with his hands. “Forget I said anything, alright? Let’s just pretend this didn’t happen.”

But you weren’t about to let it go. “Eddie,” you said softly, stepping closer to him. “You like me?”

He let his hands drop, and the look on his face was almost painful. His shoulders sagged, and for a moment, he looked like he might actually admit it. But then he shook his head again, his voice barely above a whisper.

“It doesn’t matter,” he muttered, avoiding your gaze.

You didn’t let him finish.

“It does matter,” you said quietly, stepping even closer. The distance between you closed to just a few inches, and your voice softened as your heart pounded louder in your ears. “You just said it, Eddie. You like me.”

Eddie’s breath hitched, and his eyes darted to yours, his guarded expression crumbling. He opened his mouth to respond, but the words never came. The tension between you thickened, magnetic, drawing you closer to him.

You weren’t even sure who leaned in first, but suddenly the space between you wasn’t enough. You could feel the heat radiating off him, see the flicker of hesitation in his dark eyes as they flicked down to your lips.

“Eddie…” you whispered, the sound barely audible, trembling in the charged air between you.

For the first time, he didn’t pull away. His hands twitched at his sides, his body leaning closer, as if every fiber of his being was fighting the instinct to back off.

The world seemed to still, and the only thing that existed was him, so close you could feel the ghost of his breath against your skin.

This was it... you were going to kiss him, after almost 2 months of staring at his lips and wanting to know what they felt like on yours, you were actually going to know.

Eddie didn't know what to think, his eyes were focused on your lips, but his mind was focused on that confession he just told you.

He doesn't like you, so why would he say it?

He wasn't thinking, it just slipped out, right? he totally wasn't thinking about how he liked you before he said it.

Truth is he doesn't know how he feels, you're pretty. beautiful, hot, funny...the way you laugh at his jokes, the way your eyes light up when something excites you, the way you blush when you get nervous, the way you fiddle with your fingers when you grow flustered and save a seat next to you in class- even though no one sits next to you anymore- shit.

He does like you.. but He wishes he could take it back so you wouldn't know... but that secret was out before he even realised what he said.

But he was going for it, he was about to kiss you

"Ed? I'm home" the door opened as a raspy groan echoed through the room, Eddie's uncle stepping through the door as you and Eddie jumped apart, your lips never meeting.

Your faces flaming as you stumbled backward and Eddie’s hand shot to his hair, tugging at it as he turned toward the door, his expression a mix of panic and frustration.

Wayne stood in the doorway, his lunchbox in one hand and a cigarette dangling from the corner of his mouth. He stopped short, his eyes narrowing as he took in the scene.

"Oh," Wayne said, blinking. "didn't tell me we were goin have company tonight"

Eddie groaned, his hands slapping over his face. "Wayne, what are you doing you're supposed to be here at 11?"

Wayne raised a hand in mock surrender, the corner of his mouth twitching like he was fighting a smirk. “oh yeah? why was I interuptin' somethin'?”

Eddie groaned and you looked away as Wayne's eyes met yours.

"No-" Eddie started before his uncle stopped him

"-plant shut off, gotta come home early" Wayne huffed as he walked to the bathroom, the tap running with water as Eddie turned to you, smiling tightly as he motioned to the bathroom, raising his eyebrows, his look saying 'well, that's my uncle'

You laughed softly as Wayne stepped out of the bathroom, shaking his hands from the water.

He moved to the kitchen with deliberate slowness, his eyes flicking between the two of you like he was watching the most entertaining drama he’d seen in weeks.

As Wayne grabbed a knife from the drawer, he glanced back at you with a raised eyebrow. "You stayin' for cake, Eddie's friend?" he said with a cheeky grin, winking as he went to the fridge

You Looked at Eddie as he introduced you to Wayne before turning back to you

"Do you want cake?" he mumbled, looking down as he played with his sleeve

You nodded with a shrug "sure.. if you want me to stay"

Eddie sat down by the two-seater table attached to the trailer wall and Wayne motioned for you to sit down on the other as he brought over a cake, it was a bit messy, but it looked perfect

He lit the candles, and as the lights were turned off, the warm glow bathed Eddie’s face, catching the curve of his cheekbones and the soft smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

For a moment, everything else faded- the near-kiss, the awkwardness, the unspoken feelings. All that mattered was the quiet hum of the moment, the flickering candles, and the way Eddie looked at you, like maybe, just maybe, this was the start of something neither of you could deny.

The glow of the candles danced in Eddie’s eyes; his usual bravado dimmed into something quieter, softer. You sat across from him, hands folded awkwardly on the edge of the table, not entirely sure where to look. Wayne stood behind him as he motioned you to start singing 'happy birthday' with him.

It was out of sync and very rough, but Eddie kept his embarrassed smile on his face, and once you finished the song, Wayne continued, humming off-tune as he waved his cigarette like a conductor's baton.

Eddie rolled his eyes but couldn’t suppress the small smile tugging at his lips. “Alright, Wayne, you can stop now,” he muttered as Wayne’s humming grew louder and more dramatic.

Wayne smirked, leaning against the counter. “Hey, it’s not every day my nephew turns- what is it? Twenty-three? Twenty-four?”

“Twenty,” Eddie grumbled, though there was no real bite in his tone.

“Right, Twenty,” Wayne said, feigning a look of realization. “A big year for big moments, huh?” His eyes flicked meaningfully between the two of you, his smirk widening.

Eddie groaned, slumping in his chair. “Wayne, for the love of God-”

“Alright, alright, I’ll leave you two kids alone. After cake.” Wayne winked at you again, pulling a chair over and sitting down like he had all the time in the world.

You tried to stifle your laughter, stealing a glance at Eddie. He looked equal parts mortified and amused, his fingers drumming nervously against the table.

“Make a wish, Ed,” Wayne said, gesturing toward the candles.

Eddie leaned forward, pausing for a moment as if debating what to wish for. His eyes flickered to you briefly, so quick you almost missed it, before he blew out the candles in one swift breath.

Slicing the cake with the knife he’d grabbed earlier, he smiled, putting the pieces onto napkins “Alright, here we go. One slice for the birthday boy, one for the lovely guest, and—” He plopped a third slice onto his own plate. “One for me, Since I made the bloody thing.”

Wayne’s antics had you laughing now, the tension from earlier easing like a weight lifting off your shoulders. Eddie, despite his initial embarrassment, seemed to relax as well, his knee brushing against yours under the table.

“So,” Wayne began, taking a bite of cake. “How’d you two meet?”

Eddie nearly choked on his first bite, coughing violently as he waved his hand dismissively. “Wayne-”

"Oh, for the love of God, boy, stop being so dramatic" The older man rolled his eyes grumpily.

You hesitated, glancing at Eddie for guidance, but he was too busy glaring at his uncle to notice. Finally, you decided to take the reins. “Uh, school,” you said, your voice a little unsure.

“Yeah,” Eddie interjected quickly, recovering from his coughing fit. “School”

Wayne raised an eyebrow, his grin widening. “School, huh? Didn’t know they taught awkward staring contests in class.”

You and Eddie exchanged a look, both of you visibly mortified.

“Alright, alright,” Wayne said with a chuckle, raising his hands in surrender. “I’ll stop meddlin’. For now.” He stood, grabbing his napkin and wiping his face, heading to the kitchen to fetch a beer

Eddie let out a long-suffering sigh, shaking his head. “I swear, he lives to torture me.”

“Seems like it,” you said, unable to keep the smile off your face.

For a while, the conversation drifted into safer territory. Wayne eventually retreated to his room, leaving the two of you alone once again. The clock ticked softly in the background, and the leftover candles sat forgotten in the corner of the table.

You frowned, looking back at Wayne's door after a while of silence"did you get a present?"

He raised an eyebrow as he wiped his mouth, nodding "yeah.. got it before school"

You smiled "what'did you get?" you bounced your leg, eating the last bite of cake on your napkin

"uh-" he scratched his arm, right over his bat tattoo "new dice set..n'some figurines"

"Mm" you hummed, nodding your head "cool"

Eddie glanced at you, his fingers tapping nervously against the table, silence filling the air for a brief moment. “Thanks for staying,” he said, his voice softer now.

“Of course,” you replied, meeting his gaze. “it's not everyday you turn Twenty.” you teased,

His lips twitched into a shy smile, the earlier awkwardness creeping back in. “Yeah, well...”

For a moment, neither of you spoke, the air between you heavy with unspoken words.

“Eddie…” you began, your voice trailing off. You wanted to ask about earlier, about what he said- about you. But the words wouldn’t come, tangled in the knot in your chest.

He looked at you like he was waiting for something, his expression open and vulnerable in a way you’d rarely seen. “Yeah?”

“I…” You faltered, shaking your head with a small laugh. “I’m really glad I came tonight.”

Eddie nodded, his smile softening. “Me too.”

And though nothing else was said, the quiet understanding between you spoke volumes.

Maybe you'll get to kiss him another time.

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Taglist:

@exploding-bonbon @xlostitx @pupwrites @carolineesnell @foreveranexpatsposts @itsmadamehydra @thedoubleexposurephotography @g3n3zshack @dontputyourfckingdrinkonmytable @emxxblog @nubedeoctubreval @bimboshaggy @sheneedsrocknroll92 @callmytherapistplease-blog @ifeelbadbutimhot @littlemissholy @sammybrrr @alastorssimp

ahhh, can't believe Joe's 31, currently crying

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