#I don't think my insurance covers that...

[zephyrchama]

Do you ever wonder if the Devildom has silly celebrity TV competitions like The Masked Singer?

A bright green peacock costume graced the TV's screen. The costumed celebrity gripped a microphone and swayed as he sang, commanding all attention from the audience.

"This guy's got a great set of pipes." Mammon was on the edge of his seat humming along to the classic tune. "Twenty grimm says he wins the whole season. And another twenty grimm says that it's Chort."

Satan raised an eyebrow. "I don't think that's Chort. Could he even sing? Plus, didn't he disappear because of his massive debts?"

Belphegor nodded. "I heard he's been trying to dig a river for the last six hundred years. The show's hints made this guy seem pretty great. I think it's Vapula.

"You think?" Satan rested his head on his hand and listened. "He's really good."

Hundreds of long feathers splayed out gracefully from the back of the perforner's costume, as if hypnotizing the viewers.

"I'm tellin' ya, it's Chort. He's probably on here to sweep the competition and pay off his debts. Not a bad plan." A scheme began to take shape in Mammon's brain. "If I call these production guys, they'll be beggin' to have someone like me on next season."

Asmodeus laughed, "you? Maybe in a few seasons after me. I know they're waiting to bring me on as a special guest."

"Wait, really?" Leviathan was only watching in case somebody sang an anime or game cover. Most of the time, he was boredly scrolling his phone and making technical remarks about the costumes. "C-can you take song requests?"

"It's not official yet " Asmodeus clarified, "but I know they'll want me on the show in due time. I'm just worried the mask will hide my true beauty."

The singer finished his performance with a dab and a bow. After racous applause began an excessively long commercial break. Interest in the room dwindled. Nobody cared much about curse insurance.

You hugged a cushion to your chest. Being unfamiliar with Devildom celebrities meant you couldn't play along, but listening to everyone's guesses was still enjoyable.

"That guy reminds me of Lucifer."

Belphegor and Satan made faces like they had just swallowed a frog. There was a beat of silence, then everyone in the room collectively went, "Nah."

"Where is he, anyway?" you asked.

"He said something about a favor for Lord Diavolo," Beelzebub replied through a fistful of buttered popcorn. "Won't be back until late."

"Ah."

When commercials ended, the show began to wrap up. The peacock costume reappeared as the judges tried their hardest to guess his identity. Despite its flat plastic eyes, the costume had a majestic air to it. The masked man still drew eyes even when standing still.

"Last chance for betting," Mammon said. He shook his coin purse. Nobody took up his offer.

With plenty of suspense, the emcee began to remove the contestant's mask. There was a solid minute of the camera panning between the stage, the audience, and the judges.

"Hurry up already." Belphegor tossed a piece of popcorn at the TV.

"I can't believe this!" the emcee shouted.

Asmodeus impatiently squeezed his hands together. "Well? Who is it!?"

"It's...!"

Confetti cannons and bright lights obscured the mystery man's face, yet the audience was going wild.

"I can't believe it!" The emcee screamed.

"If they cut to commercials again, I'm leaving," Satan sighed.

Thankfully, there were no more commercials. There were no more pans to the audience or the judges. There was only one person in the camera's focus.

"Your ruler of hell, the Avatar of Pride himself, the great Morning Star! It's... Lucifer!"

There was a sudden chorus of exclamations. "What!?"

Aside from the television, the House of Lamentation became dead silent. Beelzebub stopped, slowly lowering his hand of food while transfixed on the screen. Asmodeus looked like he was about to cry, having his position on the show stolen first by Lucifer. Mammon looked confused and swiveled his head around, stunned, as though his brothers were pranking him. Belphegor narrowed his eyes with displeasure.

You cautiously eyed Satan, ready to command him to stay if things got out of hand. He just stared at the screen coldly.

Leviathan was first to break the silence. "Wait, really? Lucifer's the peacock?"

"I knew it sounded like Lucifer," you bragged. You raised your arms victoriously. Your cushion flopped onto the floor.

Beelzebub was the only one to commend you. "Good job, I had no idea."

"So it wasn't Chort or Vapula." Belphegor began to drag himself off the couch. "Well, that was unexpected. I'm going to bed."

"What's the prize for this show? How much's he winnin'?" Mammon asked.

"Probably nothing. It's a small appearance fee and the rest is just exposure," Asmodeus explained. Him and Mammon both hung their heads.

Satan got up to grab the remote, mashing the power button until it clicked off. "This show sucks. Let's find something else to watch next week."

[velcrosouls]

I don't think my auto insurance will cover this

[overlyimmersed]

Found a new best song

"best song" being a compilation rather then a list. There is no particular order to what I consider "best song".

ANYWAY

[can-of-slorgs]

I'm personally blaming @starbiology and everyone who has reblogged or commented the other piece for this.

Bonus comic featuring my grundo:

[forcebookish]

had to stop taking the new adhd medication but the good news is i can drink coffee and iced tea again

[punkrockisafulltimejob]

For those who are unsure of whether or not they really have the "sensitivity to cold" symptom of fibromyalgia, because you think that it's just you not being able to handle colder temperatures like other people, that's one way of putting it. The other way is, when it's winter and the temperatures start dropping, do you feel your pain more intensely? Do you feel like you have more problems with your joints? Is your partner always commenting how cold your fingers and toes are, but it somehow gets more frequent in winter? Those are other ways to consider being sensitive to the cold.

[runawaymarbles]

separating dental insurance from normal medical coverage and making it fucking impossible to navigate is evil, actually

[rolandkaros]

really wish there was an easier way to take hormones..!

[mechanichronic]

not my grandma telling me to reconsider top surgery LMAOOOOOOO im making 10 bands and chopping this rack off

[h0ney8ee]

i stepped on my glasses and now theyre all crooked and loose :(

[sjonni33]

this is like. super embarrassing but yeah :/ i ripped my only pair of jeans today, which really sucks :( disability support has until nov 8 to decide over my case and until then i have 0 income except from the tiny bits i scrap by. uhm if anyone could like, spare a euro maybe? i'd be very grateful. i also have things listed in my shop, some are only 1 cent (or whatever you want to pay for it), i also have some stickers here, here and here. some prints here and here . shipping is as low as it can be <3 and i also offer discount codes (use RATASSES for 5% off!!) you can also commission me!!

i'd appreciate any help, even just in the form of sharing this post or reblogging/sharing my art!!

GOAL HAS BEEN REACHED!!!!!!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!!

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

.

[sureuncertainty]

if i have to see one more post about disney from people who don't work here or at least live in the area i'm gonna lose it

[jamiethebeeart]

Thinking about why spinner has his forearms covered (I am ignoring Stain's influence)

(drabble under the cut)

CW: description of scars

The league was on the run and being around each other all the time meant they saw each other outside of their villain personas. Toga wore large sweaters and kept her hair pulled back - in braids, hair ties, pigtails, pinned - it didn't matter so long as it stayed out of her face. It wasn't uncommon to see Twice with his mask off but it never lasted long. Mr. Compress kept his face covered still - in a face mask or bandana and a hat - whatever was convenient. Dabi flitted in and out, hardly staying in one place for long. When he did, it was usually with a smoke and sans jacket. Spinner still seemed on edge and standoffish, with a long sleeved shirt or jacket on - different from his sleeveless Stain inspired shirt. Shigaraki was the same as always. He had no need to don a villain persona and his hands were as close as always.

Tapping away on a hand held game console, a game over screen flashed. Huffing out a breath, movement caught Shigaraki's eye. Glancing up, he saw Spinner pushing up his sleeves. Looking back down at his game, Shigaraki paused. He knew what those were. Shigaraki looked up through his eyelashes. Scars littered Spinner's forearms, crossing over one another in sporadic multitudes. Raised bumps, pale skin, scales missing, divets and uneven gashes. Some of them looked old - pale and barely there - others looked healed, but still stretching skin unevenly and brighter, not quite settled in the skin. Raising his eyes to briefly look at Spinner's relaxed face, Shigaraki put his attention back on his console. He stared at the screen. He measured the time it blinked the game over - flash flash flash. He thought. Dabi's scars had an obvious cause, it wasn't hard to guess how and why they covered so much of his body. A single cause with irritation from improper care and overuse. He himself was intimately familiar with his own. Shigaraki furrowed his eyebrows. He knew what skin biopsies looked like, various weapons and wounds, burns and impalements, and how they healed from his time around Nomus. He knew what old scars looked like, what new ones did, and how they overlapped on the skin. He scratched his neck, the uneven surface causing his nails to catch awkwardly as he pulled across. He glanced back up. Spinner had scars that looked like biopsies, but with rough edges from unsure cuts and ripped chunks from scales that never grew back. Scars that ripped up edges of nearby scales without dislodging them. Patches of skin that Shigaraki supposed lied covered underneath all Spinner's scales. Various ages and depths telling a story, a story that Spinner kept hidden and quiet. Clicking the restart button, Shigaraki narrowed his eyes. One day, he'd get that story from him.

[fabdante]

Any headcanons for reboot Dante and medical trauma?

Side note: Considering Vergil got adopted by a rich family and presumably had regular doctor's visits and such, presumably Nephilim blood + DNA and such doesn't look any different than regular human DNA. Which... feels like it should be wrong, since Nephilim aren't human, so there's gotta be some differences there somewhere, right? Maybe it just looked normal because of whatever spell Sparda (and maybe Eva?) put on the twins?

I always figured based on that one line from Vergil about meningitis being a human sickness and thus, Dante can't catch it, that both of the twins just don't really get sick or have any medical issues. So due to that and Dante's slew of bad foster homes, that he probably just like...never went to the doctor.

I do however think that once he got in the Order, the medical division there probably ran some tests on him at Vergils behest. I'm sure the details they were given were slim and they'd probably run the same tests on Vergil before, but Vergil probably wanted something to compare to. Dante is cooperative, but talks and moves too much which is annoying when you're trying to draw blood (he talks with his hands and likes to touch things).

As for Vergil, I similarly don't think he ever got sick so only ever really went to the doctor for check ups. I guess I maybe based this on my own experiences but I never really got blood draws as a kid until they started testing me for anemia and thalassemia (anemia but worse if you have the major strain and Mediterranean). Which maybe was a result of my deathly fear of needles up until I started getting like frequent blood tests? But idk regardless it sort of led me to assume that Vergil, being the picture of health to his pediatrician, never got his blood drawn asdfghjk

The idea though that he's just got his former pediatrician out there wondering what the fuck was up with that kids blood is very funny to me. Like, I just figured all Sparda did was wipe the kids memories so any difference in their blood would be noticeable still for medical professionals. So this guy can see somethings up but is not equipped to figure out what and the kid seems fine so asdfghj let him be.

That said, and regardless of how aware he is that he is immune to human germs, I also headcanon Vergil to be a germaphobe and a hypochondriac (he has a vibe also as a fandom we all seemed to have taken in the fanon that he just never takes off the gloves and this all just rolled with it dfghjkl). He's probably always hated doctors offices and made a fuss about being there and did not trust the needles for his booster shots. Once he figured out he didn't need to go, he definitely stopped going asdfghjk. The idea of someone who is immune to all illness and disease who is incredibly afraid of it anyway is very silly and fun to me, love that about him.

[iero]

I've been lucky as to avoid going to any kind of doctor, practice or hospital of any sort for the past year-ish or so after I had some insurance issues, but I think it's time, besties...