#I don't think either of those will happen

[purplesaline]

That radar, by the way? It's your unconscious brain (aka not thr part you actively think with) recognizing subtle body language cues and other non-verbal communication cues and noting a pattern then sending up red flags.

These body language and other non-verbal communication clues are so subtle that thr other person doesn't even realize they're doing them either.

ADHD folks and Autistic folks tend to be VERY good at reading these (because out brains don't automatically filter out unimportant stimuli the way neurotypical brains do), though autistic folks aren't generally as good at understanding the flags their brain is sending up (sometimes because so manu situations male them feel uncomfortable they assume it'sa false alarm). Anyone with PTSD tends to be even more keyed into these indicators, especially when it's a potential threat.

What's really cool is that you can train yourself to get even better at doing this. It's not some mystical ability some folks have and others will never have. Even neurotypical folks can teach themselves to pay more attention to these cues. A lot of it is working on mindfulness, start using active listening skills to pay closer attention to the people you're talking to. When you get a vibe, no matter how small, don't just automatically dismiss it, tuck it away until after the conversation and analyze it. Those vibes are the ways right, the larger the database your brain has on human behavioural patterns the more accurate they'll be so when you first start out you're likely going to be off a lot. Keep in mind this skill is only and always a tool to be used in conjunction with other skills and tools, you should never rely solely on this skill to form judgement about a person.

Start paying attention to behavioural patterns. "People who do X often react this way to Y situation." And pay attention to when that's not true, try to figure out what variable you may be missing that explains why they're acting in a way you didn't predict. Human behaviour is ALWAYS rational when perceived from the perspective of the person acting. There is always a rational and logical explanation for why a person is doing anything, no matter how illogical or irrational it may seem to you. If you can't figure out a rational explanation it's because you're missing key data.

And even when you're really, really good at reading people some folks will still throw you for a loop. It happened to me recently and I trusted someone I shouldn't despite this being a special interest of mine for literal decades.

And even I was shocked when I learned about Gaiman, because the information most of us had access to was specifically curated. He always felt a bit off to me, but in a socially awkward sort of way not in a predator way.

One final point about Gaiman, don't let him get away with "They'll all said they wanted it" or whatever bullshit he's trying to excuse his behaviour with. His art has, for decades, demonstrated he has a full understanding of consent and coercion and how vulnerable people will give in to powerful ones when they feel threatened even though they don't want to. His stories are full of these situations and he clearly demonstrates he knows that it's exploitation. He doesn't get to hide behind the socially awkward "I didn't understand" justification. Neither does Palmer, though with her it was more a case of willful ignorance and wishful thinking. Wanting to believe it would be okay this time so she ignored the red flags. I've got issues with her particular brand of exploitation under the guise of community too but that's another post entirely.

I want to step away from the art-vs-artist side of the Gaiman issue for a bit, and talk about, well, the rest of it. Because those emotions you're feeling would be the same without the art; the art just adds another layer.

Source: I worked with a guy who turned out to be heavily involved in an international, multi-state sex-slavery/trafficking ring.

He was really nice.

Yeah.

It hits like a dumptruck of shit. You don't feel stable in your world anymore. How could someone you interacted with, liked, also be a truly horrible person? How could your judgement be that bad? How can real people, not stylized cartoon bogeymen, be actually doing this shit?

You have to sit with the fact that you couldn't, or probably couldn't, have known. You should have no guilt as part of this horror — but guilt is almost certainly part of that mess you're feeling, because our brains do this associative thing, and somehow "I liked [the version of] the guy [that I knew]", or his creations, becomes "I made a horrible mistake and should feel guilty."

You didn't, loves, you didn't.

We're human, and we can only go by the information we have. And the information we have is only the smallest glimpse into someone else's life.

I didn't work closely with the guy I knew at work, but we chatted. He wasn't just nice; he was one of the only people outside my tiny department who seemed genuinely nice in a workplace that was rapidly becoming incredibly toxic. He loaned me a bike trainer. Occasionally he'd see me at the bus stop and give me a lift home.

Yup. I was a young woman in my twenties and rode in this guy's car. More than once.

When I tell this story that part usually makes people gasp. "You must feel so scared about what could have happened to you!" "You're so lucky nothing happened!"

No, that's not how it worked. I was never in danger. This guy targeted Korean women with little-to-no English who were coerced and powerless. A white, fluent, US citizen coworker wasn't a potential victim. I got to be a person, not prey.

Y'know that little warning bell that goes off, when you're around someone who might be a danger to you? That animal sense that says "Something is off here, watch out"?

Yeah, that doesn't ping if the preferred prey isn't around.

That's what rattled me the most about this. I liked to think of myself as willing to stand up for people with less power than me. I worked with Japanese exchange students in college and put myself bodily between them and creeps, and I sure as hell got that little alarm when some asian-schoolgirl fetishist schmoozed on them. But we were all there.

I had to learn that the alarm won't go off when the hunter isn't hunting. That it's not the solid indicator I might've thought it was. That sometimes this is what the privilege of not being prey does; it completely masks your ability to detect the horrors that are going on.

A lot of people point out that 'people like that' have amazing charisma and ability to lie and manipulate, and that's true. Anyone who's gotten away with this shit for decades is going to be way smoother than the pathetic little hangers-on I dealt with in university. But it's not just that. I seriously, deeply believe that he saw me as a person, and he did not extend personhood to his victims. We didn't have a fake coworker relationship. We had a real one. And just like I don't know the ins-and-outs of most of my coworkers lives, I had no idea that what he did on his down time was perpetrate horrors.

I know this is getting off the topic, but it's so very important. Especially as a message to cis guys: please understand that you won't recognize a creep the way you might think you will. If you're not the preferred prey, the hind-brain alarm won't go off. You have to listen to victims, not your gut feeling that the person seems perfectly nice and normal. It doesn't mean there's never a false accusation, but face the fact that it's usually real, and you don't have enough information to say otherwise.

So, yeah. It fucking sucks. Writing about this twists my insides into tense knots, and it was almost a decade ago. I was never in danger. No one I knew was hurt!

Just countless, powerless women, horrifically abused by someone who was nice to me.

You don't trust your own judgement quite the same way, after. And as utterly shitty as it is, as twisted up and unstead-in-the-world as I felt the day I found out — I don't actually think that's a bad thing.

I think we all need to question our own judgement. It makes us better people.

I don't see villains around every corner just because I knew one, once. But I do own the fact that I can't know, really know, about anyone except those closest to me. They have their own full lives. They'll go from the pinnacles of kindness to the depths of depravity — and I won't know.

It's not a failing. It's just being human. Something to remember before you slap labels on people, before you condemn them or idolize them. Think about how much you can't know, and how flawed our judgement always is.

Grieve for victims, and the feeling of betrayal. But maybe let yourself off the hook, and be a bit slower to skewer others on it.

[yailtsv]

Reader/Paige where Paige is a Secret admirer and leaves notes and little gifts to the reader(like from the 1st to the 14th) eventually leading up to a Valentines Day Date where Paige is waiting all nervous hoping the reader shows and they both can admit feelings towards each other. Very fluffy

Secret Admirer - p.b

💌 Syn: you have a secret admirer that just so happens to be your best friend

»»— warnings: none i don’t think

»»— notes: i’m really proud of this one 🙃 i’ve also never watched the notebook i just know it’s considered a romance movie so i went with it 🤷‍♀️

»»— word count: 2.7k

»»— pair: Paige x Gf!reader

the last 13 days have been weird for you as one could say. it started with a bouquet of roses outside your dorm room with a note that just said "from: your secret admirer" and that was on the first of february.

the 2nd day was a gaint stuffed bear  outside your dorm room - like the gaint ones you would get at costco but not exactly those bears as this one is a stuffed panda bear. there was no note for this one.

the third day was a assortment of valentines balloons and a box of iced cookies and chocolate dipped strawberries with a note that said "to the most beautiful girl - your secret admirer"

the next 10 days got even freakier. you got multiple different jewelry options on different days, you got your favorite things in a basket one day, you got a build a bear one day with it already named and everything, you got at least 3 more bouquets all different colors and all different flowers, and on the 13th you received a box full of letters - like actually hand written love letters

you were going absolutely crazy. you couldn't figure out who it was but you knew it had to of been someone you were close to because they knew all of your preferences and likes/dislikes or i guess maybe you we're getting stalked right now

you're picky with your jewelry and they knew that somehow. all of the jewelry was picked and created the way you like all of your jewelry to be. not to mention you literally received a basket full of your favorite snacks,foods, smell good things, and clothing brands.

since the first day of february you have been going around asking all of your friends if it was them with all of them looking at you confused and saying no. someone had to of been lying, there was absolutely no way not one of them knew what was going on.

the letters you received on the 13th were your 13th reason - this was probably your biggest crash out

you were honestly starting to believe all your friends - that they had no idea what was going on, and you we're starting to panic

what if i have a stalker?

what if i am being watched right now?

do i need to call the cops?

those were only some of the thoughts running around in your head. your friends weren't helping either, they were only calling you dramatic and to live a little.

"you're getting expensive jewelry and gifts for free, just take it" one of your friends had told you after you told her you we're starting to get concerned

that did not ease any of your concerns. after you got back to the dorms from class you decided to study the letters and see what you could find out about your "secret admirer" - which was absolutely nothing other than they're down right in love with you.

while reading one of the letters there was a knock at your door making you look up towards that door and eventually stand up to open said door - only to see nobody there...like at all

you were about to close the door when a box on the ground caught your attention, making your breath hitch but slowly and hesitantly grab the box anyway and make your way back into the safety of your dorm - behind the closed and locked door obviously

when opening the box you come face to face with a beautiful white dress with puffy see-through sleeves, a pair of white red bottom high heels, and a note

come to the park tomorrow night @ 6:30 and wear this.

don't be scared, you know me.

- your secret admirer

you don't know wether to be relieved or more terrified. "don't be scared, you know me" could mean that you do actually know this person and they are your friend or it could mean that someone's been watching you enough to know that you're starting to get creeped out and want to make sure that you show up to the park.

you pull out the dress and the heels setting them on your desk when you see another note in the box

you once accidentally in high school spilt your drink all over your math teachers white pants and he gave you detention for a week.

-your secret admirer that's not a creepy stalker

you laughed at the signed name before remembering the other part of the note - there are only a few people that know that secret as you were really embarrassed about the whole situation, and those people are your immediate family ....and paige your best friend since high school

wait is paige my secret admirer? no she can't be. but she's the only other person that knows that. but there is absolutely no way paige is my secret admirer right?

you didn't sleep much that night. you were going back and forth with your brain wether paige was your secret admirer or not but your decided you were gonna go to the park that night

you couldn't keep questioning everything without getting answers and now? the answers are gonna be directly handed to you tonight, - obviously with your location on and sent to your mom and 9-1-1 on speed dial

it's finally time to leave. for the last few hours you've paced, showered, did your hair and makeup, paced some more, got dressed, paced, added jewelry and other accessories, talked your self out of going, talked your self back into going and left the house before you could change your mind again

you took your time in walking to the park, as one you were obviously wearing heels right now, and two your anxiety is skyrocketing right now

you spent the walk to the park thinking of everything. all the gifts, all the words in the letters, the note with your secret, your friends reactions, all of it, trying to figure out if maybe your secret admirer was paige.

it would make sense as she knows you better than anyone. she knows how you prefer your jewelry - which not a lot of people do, she knows ALL of your favorite foods and snacks, she knows all your favorite brands - not just your favorite type of clothes, the actual clothing brand, she knows how much you love stuffed animals, and how much you appreciate hand written letters

she knows everything about you, so her being your secret admirer would be a reasonable thought.

but you still can't wrap your head around that thought. you've been in love with paige since sophomore year of high school, you've just never said anything because you were scared of ruining the friendship + you didn't think she liked you back. you've been dating trashy men this whole time to hide your feelings for paige, but know it might not have been necessary?

you've snuck glances at her while she wasn't looking for years.

you've been her own personal cheerleader for years.

you've watched her in awe for years.

you've worn her jersey to games as a way to support her for years - but really you were also doing it for you, wearing her jersey or clothes in general felt safe to you, unlike wearing your then boyfriends clothes. they gave you a sense of comfort that you were scared to ask of her. you could be having a bad day and put on one of her hoodies and it feels like a soft bear hug from her - without actually getting the hug. the clothes are always a little oversized on you and no matter if she wore it last week or a month ago, it still has the faint smell of her. you could ask to borrow her clothes but you were scared to ask for a hug or comfort from her in general.

you've been her number 1 fan for  everything she does for years. she does no wrong in your eyes. if she's the reason the ball didn't go in during a game your not gonna admit that. your gonna say it was the other girls fault even if you and her both know that's not true, because that's your way of comforting her. she knows your never gonna blame her for stuff including the small meaningless things like wether she's the reason the ball went in or not.

so after years of yearning for her love, her comfort, her attention,  having her be your secret admirer feels like a dream you need to wake up from.

walking into the park you see an area lit up with fairy lights and candles nearby and start heading towards that

when you get closer you see a giant pink and white blanket on the ground with a picnic basket in the middle. wine glasses and wine on a small tray, a big wooden basket filled with what appears to be gifts, and a car parked just a few steps away with the trunk door open with fairy lights and a heart banner hanging from the door. the backseats were down and multiple blankets covering the seats with a few pillows

there also seemed to be a pile of clothes folded on top on the blanket made bed. "hey" you hear from the left making you turn your head to see paige walking out from behind a large tree with a bouquet of pink and purple flowers

"hey" you say back in a kinda relived tone "i know you probably have some questions so i'm just gonna start talking, first these are for you" she says nervously before walking closer to you and handing the flowers over to you, with you taking them "they're beautiful, thank you" you say after sniffing the flowers

"of course. um ok so i'm just gonna be straight up and say it. i love you. i'm in love with you. i have been ever since high school i was just scared to say it. i feel like now that we are both adults we're running out of time with our time together and i don't want that. i mean i'm entering the draft this year and am moving to texas, your going wherever your career takes you. we are both growing up and going down somewhat different paths. which is why i can't be scared to admit my feelings anymore. i'm definitely scared of you rejecting me but i can't be high school me anymore. that's not gonna get me anywhere other than losing you. i might still lose you after this but at least i won't be living in question wether you like me back or not."

"paig-" you try to say but get cut off "i'm not done. for years i've watched you get played,hurt, cheated on, mistreated, by guys that have no idea how much of an amazing person you are. they didn't know that they were losing a person that would drop everything for them, they didn't know that they were losing someone that would do anything for them, and every time you came to my room crying about the pain they caused you, i just wanted to wrap you in my arms and protect you from the world. show you how your supposed to be treated, buy you the flowers that they didn't think you deserved, buy you the gifts that they didn't want to spend their money on, give you all the attention,love, comfort, that they refused to give you. i don't want to watch you go through that again, i want to be to the one to buy you flowers, to buy you expensive things, to show you love because what they were showing you definitely wasn't love. i want to wake up beside you and be able to kiss you whenever and tell you i love you everyday-"

you set down the bouquet and run over to paige, immediately bringing her lips to yours in a rough passionate kiss

you pulled away for air first with paige chasing your lips before you put your hand on her chest "i love you so much. i've been in love with you since sophomore year of high school"

paige giggles at that confession "if only we communicated in high school right?" she says with an amused tone before pulling you back into her but this time the kiss was soft and gentle, saying the remaining words paige didn't get to say.

after the love confessions you and paige ate the food she packed and talked for awhile before paige saw you starting to shiver

"cmon" she says standing up and holding her hands out for you "what? where we going?" you asked while she pulled you up

she didn't answer and instead just pulled you to the car and handed you one of the stacks of clothes and grabbed a blanket holding it up

"get dressed in those, i'm gonna hold the blanket up and look away" you don't question her and do as she says, getting dressed in the way to long sweatpants and oversized hoodie that still smells like paige

"alright i'm done" you say making paige put down the blanket "get in the trunk and get comfy, im gonna go pick up our stuff" she says setting the blanket down "i can help?" you say watching her as she turned back around from walking towards the picnic area "nope, get comfy in the trunk, i'll be back." paige says before walking away

you just shake your head with an amused smile on your face but listen to her anyway and get in the trunk and under one of the blankets. you can see her grabbing all the stuff and then eventually made her way back to the car - putting all the stuff in the drivers seat before moving back to the trunk area, taking off the lights and heart banner on the outside of the car as there was some lights she hooked up around the inside of the car too - so you guys still had light

she then gets in the trunk herself, shutting the trunk door and handing you her ipad "find a movie or something for us to watch" you take the ipad from her and put the password in going to netflix

from the corner of your eye you can see her take off her open button up shirt and crop top leaving her in her bra before she puts on a team usa hoodie then also changing from her jeans to a matching pair of sweatpants

you look back towards the ipad before she sees you were definitely checking her out - deciding on the notebook

she takes her outfit she just took off and shoes putting them in the passenger seat before grabbing your dress and heels and doing the same

"did the heels fit good?" she asks while also going under the blanket and getting comfortable "yeah, but if you're gonna buy me stuff i'm putting you on a budget. today, plus the outfit, plus all the gifts leading up to today must've cost you a fortune." you say as she went onto her side, and grabbed the ipad putting it on the side of the car door in front of you

"how about i worry what i spend my money on and you enjoy being spoiled? cause i ain't gonna stop spoiling you." she says while wrapping her arm around your waist and turning you so your also on your side - with your back to her chest

you just shake your head amused before she reaches over and starts the movie. during the intro you and her both moved a little bit to get more comfortable before cuddling into each other more

halfway during the movie you could basically feel paige's nerves - for what reason? you have no idea so you just reach up and hold her hand that's above your head - as her arm is acting as a pillow right now

paige leans her head closer to your ear "will you be my girlfriend?" you turn your head before turning your whole body to face her and look into her eyes

you lean up and gently cradle her face in your hands and bringing her face to yours and giving her another passionate kiss

"yes i'll be your girlfriend"

🏷️ @melpthatsme @rebecca-woso @authentic-girl03 @ldapper

[weloveluigi]

Why are people canceling Luigi Mangione (and why you shouldn't believe it)

This is a forewarning of impending LM drama

Context: Luigi Mangione, notoriously vouched for—by everyone—as a good and kind person, was spiraling mentally before going missing and changing his identity in 2024. He was in a lot of severe pain, suffered a failed surgery to repair his broken back, and underwent a traumatic event in Japan that involved either seeing a man die, or nearly die, in spite of his best attempts to get him help. He spoke about this and his mental health struggles at the time with a man named Gurwinder.

During that time, Luigi began to become nihilistic and posted a lot of frankly cringe rants on Twitter/x where he was unsurprisingly immediately dog piled on by redpill edgelords who treated him like shit and essentially bullied him off of Twitter/x for not being cruel or edgy enough to appease them. Luigi then deleted his edgy tweets from that time and never spoke to any of them again.

What's happening:

One of those guys who bullied Luigi on Twitter/x, Max/Minordissent—a bigoted, transphobic, racist misogynist, who openly uses the R slur and other hateful rhetoric—who has since stated he hopes Luigi Mangione gets the death penalty, is back.

He is now waiting until Luigi's trial the 21st of February so he can "leak DMs" supposedly showing Luigi Mangione's desperate attempts to have a friend wherein he alleges Luigi had reached out to him for friendship and they engaged in a hate filled conversation. He is hoping to 'expose Luigi as a bigoted person' despite minordissent being literally the exact kind of person he's trying to get Luigi canceled for being. The troll in question—assuming he hasn't faked the screenshots because he's a troll and who mind you, hates Luigi for "not being bigoted enough"— is hoping to throw a wrench at Luigi Mangione's case while his life is on the line, mid trial. He literally wants Luigi to die. He's hoping when he "leaks the DMs" people will stop supporting Luigi and offset the jury's opinions of him.

Minordissent thinks that it would be funny if this caused Luigi to ultimately lose his trial and eventually be killed through Capitol punishment. Which due to unprecedented terrorism charges could be by firing squad.

I want to remind you all:

There is no reason to believe anything Max/Minordissent says or screenshots because he's a troll. He's an unreliable character witness at best, and he's also a person of extremely low moral character.

To date, we only have screenshots of him arguing with Luigi, it's possible that at no point did Luigi even want to be this guy's friend, but was instead being harassed by him.

Don't let whatever these upcoming real or fake screenshots do or don't show, dictate whether you want Luigi Mangione to live or die. I know that internet drama can be "juicy" but this is a young man whose life is in your hands. A most likely innocent man who is facing the death penalty, for an alleged act of heroism no less.

If you want to know if Luigi is actually a bigot, write him a letter. Tell him about what you go through as a minority. Ask Luigi if those screenshots are real, if they depict how he currently feels, ask him if those thoughts have changed. Let him know it means a lot to you if he promises to change those beliefs.

Let the poor man speak for himself for once instead of just sentencing him to his literal death over whatever some nutjob on Twitter says. It's very possible Luigi, as a white, possibly straight man, at some point did say or believe something that is hateful. Help him grow and do better if that's the case. He's a human being. He can't get better if you kill him.

[gallusrostromegalus]

What kind of deck would Kenpachi use for duel monsters?

Zaraki is the kind of guy who will hunt down Bakura and (gently (for Zaraki )) shake him until he does whatever the trick was that he heard about was that would turn him into a card so he could fight Exodia on foot, like the gods intended.

As for other people, because it's funny to contemplate:

Ichigo: Bad at card games, collects his deck 100% based on how much he likes the card art, inexplicably manages to make something remarkably functional, even if he nearly times out a dozen times because I'm he's reading the text on every card he draws.

Rukia: Melffys.

Chad: also Melffys

Uryuu: Understands how to run a functional deck with pendulum summoning. Cannot explain it to anyone else.

Mizuiro: Has a deck because he and Mokuba are casual acquaintances and the economics of Kaibacorp fascinate him. Plays much more competently than he thinks he does.

Keigo: plays Digimon.

Orihime: Has actually known and been online friends with Tea Gardner for longer than she's known Ichigo, because the former Los Osaka High Schooler and Now Prima Ballerina is the OTHER S-ranked Fairy Deck Player in Duel Monsters Online.

---

Gotei-13:

Duel Monsters has migrated to Soul Society via Reverse London, but only some members of the Gotei-13 know of the game, let alone play with any competence.

Mayuri likes the card art and has casually attempted to re-create some of those monsters in the flesh because he was bored.

Hitsugaya thinks it's "so lame" but if you ask him why it's lame he has remarkably well-informed opinions about the game design that could only have come from getting WAAAAY too into it at one point.

Gin played duel monsters online briefly until Aizen took an interest, because the concept of matching wits with a total stranger who couldn't see him either intrigued him. Gin taught him the basics, (these are the three scores that matter, the rest is conditions creation, you'll love it-!) and released him into the forums. Tousen enjoyed a nice three-month vacation as Aizen got addicted to online play until he entered an unranked tournament and got wasted in two turns by someone with a bunch of twee little fairies in the first round. Threw an enormous temper tantrum about it and forbade anyone, especially Gin who made it to the semi-finals, from ever mentioning the game again

Byakuya, the universal expert on all things Ambassador Wakame, took an interest in the game because he recognized the Kaibacorp Logo on a card Rukia had. There is very little Wakame Ambassador Merch in soul society because it's actually a Living World IP, and Byakuya had noted that the company that owned all things Wakame Ambassador had been purchased by Kaibacorp. He asks Rukia, who tells him all about Duel Monsters, and that there is an entire Kaibaland Theme Park a few cities over from where she was deployed in the living world.

"...would it be possible to contact this Seto Kaibacorp?" Byakuya frowns into the middle distance.

A week later, Rukia unexpectedly opens a gate into Ichigo's Bedroom at 2AM.

"Not directly but anybody can write to his company and the message might get passed along- like how Rikichi sorts all the mail addresses to you that gets sent to the sixth." Rukia shrugs. "You'd need a return address in the living world for him to write back though."

-

"Gah!" She yelps.

"THIS IS WHY YOU CALL AND WAIT FOR PERMISSION TO COME OVER!" Ichigo, home from undergrad for the week, growls at her.

"Hi Miss Rukia!" Orihime waves from on top of Ichigo, not bothering to get dressed.

"Uh, um- congratulations?" Rukia mumbles, covering her face.

"What happened now?" Ichigo groaned, reaching for his pants.

"My bro- Captain Kuchiki requests your assistance in delivering a message to a human in the living world!" She stammers, thrusting the message in his general direction.

"Rukia I don't think this will go through the postal system..." Orihime mutters taking it from her instead of putting on clothes or moving from her position on top of Ichigo.

"What? I thought we put enough stamps on it-? Gah! Please put on a shirt!" Rukia yelps.

"Rukia you know what boobs are." Orihime mutters, studying the missive. "I'll just put this in a box and mail it to them in the morning, okay?"

"Yeah! Sure! Fine!" Rukia sputters, reopening the gate as fast as she can.

"REMEMBER TO CALL NEXT TIME!" Ichigo hollers after her.

-

The Brothers Kaiba stared at the message.

"I'd say it looks like someone tried to mail me from the Meji Era but I've had enough of time-travelling bourgeoisie for one lifetime." Seto grumbled.

"That's not what you were saying last night!" Atem teased from over the video call.

"I mean, if I'm doing the calculations right, and he really is offering to pay us in bullion, that's like... Ten times what the Wakame Ambassador IP is worth." Mokuba frowned at the figures laid out in neat but archaic handwriting on the medieval-looking scroll that arrived in a box, but covered with postage from six different countries inside.

"...when do you get back again?" Seto glared at Atem through the call.

"Not until June, my impatient lord of dragons." Atem smirked.

"...fuck it, let's meet this guy." Seto decided. "He can't be any weirder than everyone else I know."

-

Lord Byakuya Kuchiki was, in fact, on par with, if not actually over the median level of weirdness in Seto's circle of tolerated people.

He really did look and speak like he'd stepped out of a time machine from the late 1800's and was, indeed, completely up front and honest about purchasing the rights to Wakame Ambassador and any merchandise Kaibacorp had, with a chest full of gold bullion.

Unlike most of Seto's acquaintances-with-benefits, Lord Kuchiki was polite, addressed him with a proper level of respect, perfectly straightforward in his request and even explained that he knew he was over-paying, but he'd been on the wrong side of copyright law before, and at least some of this was overvaluing the property as insurance that someone wouldn't attempt to buy it out from under him.

"...Alright, we have a deal." Seto smirked, leaning back in his chair. "I have to ask though- why Wakame Ambassador, of all things?"

"Why the Blue Eyes White Dragon?" He gestured to the office's distinct decoration with a knowing smile. "There is no shame here- if anything, I admire the boldness with which you live your truth."

Seto squinted at him for a long moment, before slowly cracking a smile. "Alright- you tell me about Wakame Ambassador and I'll tell you about her."

-

"Unbelievable." Mokuba gaped.

"I didn't know it was possible." Muttered Rukia.

The two dark-haired, diminutive siblings of more famous older brothers regarded each other for a moment.

"Does. Does yours not talk either?" Mokuba asked, pointing into the office where Kaiba and Kuchiki had been excitedly discussing something non-stop for the better part of three hours.

"I'm lucky if I can get a dozen words out of him a week." Rukia gawked. "He. He doesn't smile like that either? What the hell??"

"Seto smiles, but it's usually a threat- I. I don't think I've ever seen him this chill before..." Mokuba marveled at the scene before them.

"Do we... Leave them to it?" Rukia muttered.

"We'll never get on any of the rides at this rate." Grumbled Karin, who had heard the words "roller coaster park" and elbowed Ichigo in the stomach to take the job of escorting the Kuchiki siblings to Kaibaland from him. "Yuzu?"

Yuzu, who had been drafted into the expedition because she could actually make sense of the high-speed rail system, closed the book she'd been reading with a sigh and stuck her head in the door.

"Mr. Kuchiki? I'm sorry to interrupt, but we left so early I didn't get to eat breakfast, and it's past lunchtime now..." She said, giving the highly manipulatable shinigami her best Precious Moments Figurine face.

"Huh?" Kaiba blinked, then look down at the clock on his desk. "...How is it one thirty?"

Kuchiki looked at something that might have been a cell phone or a large beetle. Seto had learned to stop asking those questions. "Good heavens, you must be starving! Is there a commissary or..?"

"No way, we've got a food expo going on at the Astrodome. They can have whatever they want, on me." Seto shook his head, getting up and waving for them to follow.

"What the FUCK?" Mokuba whispered.

"Oh wow!" Rukia gasped, eyes sparkling "-do you think there will be carrot cake?"

"-So tell me about this Agents Of Nori filler arc," Seto said with genuine fascination as the two men walked down the hall, leaving bewildered siblings in their wake.

-

Yugi frowned at the latest Duel Monsters expansion with concern for the better part of ten minutes before slowly looking up at Mokuba on the other side of the living room "...I feel like I missed something important."

"What?" Mokuba blinked, looking up from his CapMon spreadsheets. "Oh, yeah. Seto made a friend who got him into this bizarre old cartoon, so now there's a line of cards based on the IP. I think it's a birthday present because the guy got some author to write up a novelisation of the new Blue Eyes canon for his."

Yugi stared blankly at Mokuba.

"Seto."

"Yes."

"...Made a friend?"

"Yyyyyyep."

"...on his own? Organically?"

"Believe it or not, Seto does pay attention to your friendship speeches." Mokuba glared.

"...I'm. I'm glad? I just can't get my head around it. What did he DO?" Yugi glared.

"...It's not so much that Seto did anything so much as Mr. Kuchiki is a very similar type and degree of fucking weirdo Seto is, and due to your good influence, Seto didn't immediately panic about that and... They just kind of..." Mokuba pursed his lips, trying to think of a word, and instead interlaced his fingers. "-meshed. Like gears."

Yugi's stare went from blank befuddlement to Great fear "I cannot overstate how alarming the concept of Two Setos is. We did that once, and the universe almost ended."

"Nah, it's fine.- if anything, he's a good example." Mokuba waved. "Kuchiki has an even bigger and more proactive cadre of friends that follow him around and holler if he misbehaves, so he's a lot more domesticated than Seto is."

Yugi sat on the couch, trying to imagine a less feral Seto, and could feel himself getting a headache.

"Kuchiki also looks and acts like he stepped fresh out of the Heian-era imperial court scene." Mokuba added.

"THERE IT IS!" Yugi sighed with relief.

[ray-moo]

>uh, no, we do not accept gender in our fight for liberation. why would we accept the cage of oppression in our spaces and conversations? I mean you can say this, but treating maleness and woman-ness as more than biological realities belies that you don't really believe this.

>we deal with class dynamics, here, since the class of male humans oppressed the class of female humans. Well there you go. The non-biological aspect to sex is the class dynamics aspect, that is, a gender. It appears to me that you treat membership in the class you enter into based on your biological sex as a gender.

>But since you asked, the individual male benefits from the oppression of women and girls Certain women benefit from the oppression of women and girls, certain men are thrown under the bus to sustain that oppression. Is such a woman part of the oppressor class? Is such a man part of the oppressed class?

>And when he does nothing to help dismantle our oppression, or hold his male friends and family member accountable, he’s part of the problem. he is culpable for partaking in our oppression. I assume this is true for women who do this as well?

>“the collective of men isn’t capable of doing things” then how does oppression even happen? Because individual men do things to individual women

>but this doesn’t really matter to you, does it? you just wanna ‘not all men’ and derail our conversations and get pissy at radfems I think radfems assuming everyone who disagrees with them is either malicious or stupid is the reason why y'all are stuck as a fringe movement on the edges of feminism.

>For pointing out facts and using statistics and data and evidence in our arguments. Using statistics and data and evidence would be saying that a man is more likely to commit crimes than a woman, and a woman is more likely to be a victim of violence than a man. The magical TERF thinking is the 'male original sin' radical feminists believe in, as well as the belief having a vulva makes your oppression more worthy of being liberated from than a male's oppression.

I mean sure, you can believe in those things. But at least admit that there's a sexual element beyond biology which motivates said behaviour. Y'know, what the gendies call a gender.

sorry

[wantonlywindswept]

release the kraken corries

okay so imagine that like a year or so into the war palpatine thinks 'actually i would prefer to have my future apprentice more nearby for corrupting' so he decides to recall anakin and the 501st to coruscant, because they definitely need their best jedi defending the front and oh wouldn't you look at that, a certain senator is always there too! wins all around!

but now the 501st is bored out of their minds and need something to do and anakin won't let them go back out onto the front because they're his, so the excellent solution?

the 501st replace the corries! clones are interchangeable anyway, right?

and even though the corries haven't seen frontline battle it's fiiine even if they get wiped out, bc palps has what he wants on coruscant now

and it's not like the corries have ever needed a jedi so why would they need one now? so they're given to some whatever-admiral and booted out to go join the frontline rotations, problem solved.

within 3 days the corries have either manipulated the admiral into thinking he's calling all the shots when it's actually fox or they've introduced him to an unfortunate airlock malfunction, so sad, couldn't have happened to a worse person

and with no jedi around they don't have anyone saying ridiculous shit like 'we should try negotiation first' or 'you can't assassinate every political leader on the planet'

(alpha 17 bullies his way on board within a week)

and they start blasting around the galaxy Getting Shit Done and it is maybe not the best in terms of optics but wow those clone death toll numbers sure do go down

and one of the times they (grudgingly) work with another battalion the other clones are going 'what the absolute shit' while the corries steamroll over everything in their path, an absolutely feral group of highly-trained shock troopers used to fighting dirty and utilizing insane tactics from years on coruscant FINALLY able to take out their frustrations on the unsuspecting galaxy separatists

Cody, halfheartedly, the Jedi Council making encouraging motions just out of sight of holocall: Fox could you please tone it down a little.

Fox, sipping a spimosa at some sleezy separatist's castle he just took over: How about no.

Cody, hissing through gritted teeth: I am so fucking envious of you right now.

[writingwisterias]

i’m so sorry i know you’re not taking requests but i need to just say it so i don’t forget about it, but when you have time could you possibly do like a nsfw alphabet of leon?

Hi! Dw! I always get around to them eventually I was just being spammed and got overwhelmed with the holidays!! I hope you enjoy this!

Warnings: SMUT, MDNI

Gn!Reader

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Very attentive. His primary focus is making sure that you are comfortable and have everything you need. He will clean himself briefly just so he doesn't get cum everywhere but then his attention is focused on you very quickly. He will go and get a clean towel to clean you up, get you comfortable clothes or find his discarded shirt to put on you. I also think he is very big on physical touch so he will cuddle you and hold you close just so he can ensure that you are well cared for and okay.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favorite body of his partner is thighs. He loves burying his face in between them or holding them if he sits next to you squeezing them slightly. He would also lay his hand on your thigh if he's driving - moving his hand upwards as well but that depends on his mood. I don't think he would have his own favorite part but if you show love to a certain area he will associate that with you and then progressively start to love it.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Addicted to being messy with his cum if he can. He loves watching it spill out of you or just cumming on you. He will draw your orgasm out if he can, making sure there's enough time in between each one that he can feel how his cock feels when coated in your cum. He doesn't care if he gets covered either, love's it if he can feel it on his lower stomach and balls. The messier the better. His loads are also a lot, like he cums an insane amount but that's because it can be a while between each time he sees you.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Loves it if his partner is freakier than him. It's arousing to him seeing his partner not get enough of him and is just constantly needy for him. He will not care if you pick him up from the airport or whatever and drag him to the bathroom etc for a quicky. It just excites him that you need him that badly.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

I think that even RE2 is experienced, maybe not with any in depth kinks that you might have but with simple intimacy or dominance it's like a switch and you can barely keep up.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Depends on the era, but I would say with his state of mind and how he loves people that it would either be missionary or Cow-girl. He loves watching you come undone because of him and both of those allow him to get up close and personal.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Again depends on the situation but I don't think he would very often but this Leon I'm sure he will crack some form of badly timed joke. He does make sexual innuendos often so it will most likely happen before the actual act.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He's not clean shaven but he is tidy. However, he would change that if you prefered him hairier or clean shaven. It makes no difference to him

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

He values it and craves it. It's his favorite part of the act being able to show you how much he loves and appreciates you and your connection with him. I don't think he's great at putting how he feels into words so this is a perfect way for him to do that.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Most likely to do it if you are busy or away from him. He's very slow and methodical with it though. Cupping his balls, doing long teasing strokes to ensure that he is properly relaxing himself. His eyes never leave what he's doing either, watching the tip begin to bead his pre- cum and turn a dark red when he's getting closer. Love's to film the finishing and send it to you as well. When he does cum its quick and in longer streams meaning it's always a hassle to clean up. (Bonus if you are there for him to force you to lick it up)

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

I do think he's fairly dominate and enjoys the slight power play that can come with it. He doesn't have much control over his life or how he spends his time so this gives him an outlet and chance to do that. He would be more of a softer dom than a harsh one but depending on how you act you never know.

L = Location (favorite places to do the deed)

I think he's daring and isn't opposed to public or risky sex but prefers anywhere in the house. If he's that needy he will just take you anywhere though it doesn't really matter/ make a difference what surface you are on.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Pretty basic but just your pleasure and comfort. As long as you are turned on or enjoying it then he is as well

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Anything that hits too close to his job so Gunplay, harsh impact etc. Time with you is his distraction so he wouldn't want to combine the two

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

LOVE EATING YOU OUT, he will do it all day if you let him. He's got insane accuracy with his tongue. He also loves watching you take him and find it hard to not be so rough with it, if he gets carried away.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Depends on his mood, I feel like he would lean more towards slow and sensual but if you have teased him too much or perhaps its a hard day he would be a bit rougher.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Again, depends on the situation and how desperate he is. He will try and risk it with time. Like if you have 5 minutes until you need to leave you best bet he's making use of those 5 minutes.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

I think he's pretty open to experiment, especially if you do something that he's not heard of/ tried but loves. Your relationship is built on trust so he won't be afraid of trying anything for you. As long as you respect his boundaries and opinions if he doesn't like something or you are willing to adapt it for him to be comfortable.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

With his job stamina is needed so he can go for a while if he wants. The amount of rounds depends on if he's been on a mission recently or how tired he is.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Loves to use toys on his partner and is always getting new ones for you if he sees something interesting. For himself I think he would own a few types of cock rings and might use them on himself alone or with you just to feel his cock throb a lot more and last longer

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

You can't catch a break, he will tease you all the time. Has a bunch of post gym pictures or straight up nudes he will send you throughout the day. Whispers dirty thoughts in your ear as you are both together at events. Subtle but noticeable touches as well

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Breathless moans, Whimpers, Grunts. He's very vocal in terms of sounds but I don't think he would talk much. Maybe a few lines here and there. Very loud sometimes if he's really needy

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Love's tits, whenever that's him playing with yours or you touching his. He will just sit there and hold them or play with them and loves it if you do the same.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

I mean...we've all seen the numerous mods. I think it also depends on the era, RE2 and RE4R would be a bit more chiseled I imagine because of their training it's maintained better compared to the later eras it would still be there but slightly softer or less defined because his diet/workout is basically just surviving.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

I think it's higher than the average person because he just adores you so much, he wants to be close to you, teasing you. You fuel the drive so if have spent a long time with him uninterrupted he's craving it.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

I don't think it would be immediately but it depends on the time of day. He would like to hold you and watch you chill out for a while either watching you sleep or just feeling you close against him.

[omgfangirlland]

The Shadows That Nurture 15

Don't really have anything to say 🫠 thank y'all for the attention, for reading etc, ch 16 is done, ch 17 may take longer cuz I think I'm catching a cold so uhhh- enjoy and stay safe!

Masterlist || First || previous<< Chapter 15 >>next(TBC)

Jason was having a terrible week, starting with Ms. “I wouldn’t have been as forgiving if you didn’t die and came back kinder to me” Wayne- well- Grayson? He doesn’t know anymore- he’s close enough to just forging papers that say you’re his biological little sister just to fuck with Bruce.

Speaking of- Jason hasn’t turned on his coms and the phone specifically for the bats since the night the family found out. He’s seriously debating throwing those devices out the window, but he finds it more entertaining how everyone is in shambles.

Granted, while the others have tried cornering him to- politely ask questions- Jason is more paranoid about Damian and Cassandra. Cassandra not speaking wasn’t something he worried about, but her not texting him nonsense throughout the day made him antsy. Adding to that the fact that the demon brat didn’t even try to knife him down once? Yeah, no, Jason was on edge. Either those two were planning something or they knew something the others didn’t- frankly, he didn’t like either option.

He and the other rogues have been upping the attack on the rich to try and exhaust the bats, take their attention from you- but with each attack the bats seemed to care less and less. And if they did show up, they were starting to punch harder, to break more bones, to use those “only when necessary” blades more and more. They were getting angrier, desperate, and dangerous.

Good. It was about time they saw what they’d been pushing to the side, what they all did at one point. However, Red Hood was getting angrier at the pure audacity they had to just snoop around his turf every 13th of the month, they’ve been doing it for a while, sure, but they got sloppier with their stealth. It was making everyone nervous, the kids especially.

And now the gall of him to show up as Bruce Wayne, with that blasted fake smile, and that sweet, sweet food from Alfred. “Bruce. What are you doing here?” Harvey’s voice broke Jason from drooling over the buffet Pennyworth had made. “I-…” Bruce took in a shaky breath. Batman knew he should have rehearsed something, but lately, he’s only done impulsive things. “I’ve been a terrible father to my youngest daughter. I’m sure you all know that- I’m trying to slowly see the great achievements she made despite that and to try and understand her better.”

“And we’re supposed to believe that?” Waylon growled, tail tapping the asphalt anxiously. Harley backed Croc up, grinding into the ground the fact that he’d never tried before, that it’s been years. But one of the kids ignored the tension, coming up to the man and just grabbing his hand, smiling brightly at him.

“She always told us that some people are worth giving second chances.” The little girl looks back at the others. “He’s seeing he did bad and trying to fix it.” She shrugged and the rogues couldn’t argue. Without those second chances they wouldn’t be here, but that doesn’t mean they’ll make it easy for the trust fund baby. “Well, Mr. Wayne. Better get to work.” Two-face cackled as Cobblepot started directing the man to start carrying old, unusable furniture out of the buildings, giving the goons a break.

Jason turned to look at the little girl, his hands on his hips. “You stole his watch.��� It wasn’t a question, it was very much a statement, a statement at which the little kid just smiled brightly. “She always said to rob the rich blind, too, and that man is too trusting of little kids. I got his ring too.” Jay couldn’t argue with that, so he just ruffled the little rascal’s hair and went on his way.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

“I’m sorry- You have to marry a fish?!” You almost yelled into the com as you stopped a car from splatting a woman. “And C is just letting that happen? I’m telling you, he’ll become enemy number one.” Setting the car down, ignoring Cecil saying he could hear you, you quickly grabbed the woman and flew to the protective dome where most civilians were staying safe. Your eyes met hers and you immediately complimented the bright green color. “Wha- not you two morons! I was talking to somebody else- Yes, I’m on the job.” You sigh as you set her down before getting back to action.

“Robot wanted me on the scene to take care of the civis, said something about Immortal needing the win, but uh…” You watch as the man gets overwhelmed and decapitated, his body going limp while Dupli-Kate and Black Samson try to get to him. “It’s kinda pathetic. They’re not fighting like a team. Robot, Shrinking Rae, and Moster Girl seem to be the only ones able to keep up.”

Cecil just sighs, turning on the coms for everyone. “Sorceress. End it, now.” While Robot tried to argue against it you just acted, getting tired of this mess. Getting higher in the air your hands raised, eyes glowing as you muttered some of the new spells Zatanna and John taught you.

Most of the aliens fell to the ground lured into a deep sleep state while the ones who could fight against the magic were quickly chained- all, with a wave of your hands, fell through a portal straight to their home planet. Landing you grabbed the Immortal’s head, moving closer and sticking it close enough that the skin started reattaching on its own. When you got up Kate was quick to tell you off and take your place, pulling the man onto her lap.

You just shrugged making your way to Robot and Amanda. “What’s her problem?” You mutter while subtly checking everyone out for injuries. Rex almost crashed onto you as he groaned, arm swinging over your shoulder. “She’s pissy because you and the ass were a thing, and she thinks he still likes you.” You frown, hand hovering over his face to fix the bloody mess. “That’s stupid. We weren’t. And if we were and he was still after me she should put herself first and find someone who won’t make her feel like that.”

“Wait- they are together? Like for real?” You look at the others as they get closer, most nodding. “You two weren’t? You really expect me to believe that-agh! You did that knowingly!” Rex cried as a bone set back in place quite painfully while you simply answered with a yes.

“Most of the heroes thought that. You two were pretty friendly for a while.” Black Samson shrugs. “Yeah, because we’re both immortal. We were venting about that, we understood each other, and then… Omni-Man happened, and he called me and my brother ticking bombs. Too dangerous to be helping.” Amanda hissed at that, face cringing. “Damn, that’s such an asshole thing of him to say.”

“I don’t hold that against him. But we are not our father, he should know better, and I won’t hang around him until he apologizes and means it.” You looked over your shoulder as the man in question groaned. “Speaking of- time for me to go.” You let go of the healed Rex, pat Robot’s head, and high-five Amanda. “See you later, losers.” Rudy looks at Amanda. “Why did she pat my head?” Monster girl snorts. “It’s called affection- don’t!” she slapped his hand away. “Don’t do that to me, I’ll break your legs.”

Before you could lift off the ground once you were far enough the woman you saved before quickly stopped you, calling you over. “I just wanted to thank you. Have you eaten? Perhaps I can buy you something? There’s this café down this street, they make amazing toast sandwiches and milkshakes.” You just laughed; not like you could say no to free food. “You don’t have to thank me or pay for-“ You tried to be a lady and politely refuse, but the woman insisted, urging you to take her and have a little break.

“Alright, ma’am, you won.” You smirked as you picked her up before taking flight. “May I know the name of who’s paying for my meal, at least? I mean, I may start thinking you’re an assassin or something if you keep being so mysterious and pushy.” You teased while following her directions, but she just gave you a smirk. “I’m Talia.”

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Bruce was sitting next to Jason, looking at the kids and rogues, but his eyes couldn’t help but drift to the murals. “She really did all of this?” Jason just nodded at his question. “She did a lot. This is a small thing. Your foundations can only do so much, Bruce. Sometimes people need community, need love, and support, and to feel like they belong. She gave that to a lot of people here.”

He nods to the murals. “When she was painting those, some kids tagged it. She caught them and asked them to join, telling them she’d pay. And she did. It was enough for those kids to keep a roof over their heads while we were building the affordable housing building down the block, and it was enough for them to put towards education.”

“One is aiming to be an engineer and the other two are going for art subjects.” Jason looks at the man. “Many of the goons Batman was fighting quickly quit and started working at the orphanage or the hospital once they found out they could afford to live and their wants with the salary offered. You can’t always solve shit by paying for buildings, sometimes that does the opposite. It just makes shit more expensive when it has the name of some billionaire attached to it.”

“This? Helping each other, creating things they can afford while opening job opportunities everyone is qualified for, and nobody will have to break their backs only to decide if they should pay for groceries or rent that month- that helped. It brought the crime rate down. Sure, I still sell drugs, crimes still happen, but surprisingly that has gone down for my zone too.”

“She has a job now, a well-paying one. So, the allowance you send mostly goes to this- I think she even sends some of her actual salary here. I began adding to it, and Penguin started doing similar on his turf.” Jason shrugs. “We gather it all and split it so everyone can pay bills, can have money for groceries, and clothes, and even have some extra on the side. Some still don't get paid enough due to the government not wanting to fund us, but what we put together helps make what is a 7-dollar-per-hour job into a 20-25-30-dollar-per-hour job. When she sends too much, we either give bonuses or put it to vote and repair something. It usually ends up being that, it’s how we repaired the local kindergarten and school. It’s how we repaired a lot.”

“I never knew-“ Jason just laughs at Bruce. “Yeah, I didn’t either. I was a little shit like you, too, remember? It took me dying to see that.” The young crime lord looks Bruce in the eyes. “That’s why I won’t tell you where she is, what she does, who she is now.” Bruce looks at his son, the tiredness in him shining through now more than ever. “She’s in Chicago, lived in NYC for a bit.” The older man mutters.

“I’m… I’m afraid of how she’d react, of what I will find out if I go looking for her.” He whispers and Jason simply shakes his head. “You’re afraid she’ll reject you, brush you off like you did. You’d deserve it. Everyone in this blasted family would.”

Bruce nods. He wasn’t able to sleep for a while after finding out one of his kids was missing and he didn't even know. He mostly sat in his office, in front of his parents' portraits. Every single one looked more disappointed in him than the other- he knew that wasn’t possible, they were paintings… but a part of him also remembers those portraits being- happier.

“Have you gone in her room yet?” Bruce shakes his head, his question waking him from his thoughts. Nobody did, not even Alfred, the guilt was eating everyone alive, he was sure Dick would cry or break something if he even looked at her door. “You should.” Jason insisted. “Call the others, you all are going to look into her room, into her life, and see what hell we all put her through.” The young man nudged the older man to get up when Cobblepot came closer, trying to put Bruce to more work. He wasn’t doing this to better them, Jason wanted the family to be broken. It was selfish, but being selfish is what made him your favorite rogue.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

“So, how was everyone’s day?” Debbie’s nightly question was asked again as she set her drink down.

“Well, instead of marrying a fish I ended up fighting a sea monster and then I finally moved into my dorm with William.” Mark said as he ate. “I have hella parental issues, and I think everyone should compliment my achievements more because I almost cried when this lady I ate lunch with said she was proud of how quickly I grew in my powers.”

“You almost cried?” Debbie asked, worry on her face at the revelation. Maybe they should have put you in therapy the first time you came clean with Bruce’s neglect. Mark, however, was more fixated on the unnamed lady, knowing you were mostly joking. “…You went on a date?” You sigh. “No. Stop doing that overprotective older brother BS, you look like a mangy Chihuahua acting like that.” He just pouted.

Tag list: @bat1212 @trashlanternfish360 @shycreatorreview @syrooo @a-lurking-fae @alittletiredcry @kittzu @plsfckmedxddy @blackhood1229 @nxdxsworld @leeiasure @dandelion-delusion @lovebug-apple @sillysealsies @tsxukikami @enchantingarcadecreation @alishii @d3nnji @itsberrydreemurstuff @yuyuzi-ling @welpthisisboring @1abi @mxvoid26 @persephone-kore-law @bluevenus19 @ryuushou @asillysimp @aalunar @cxcilla @sirenetheblogger @pinkluv29

[tmrwds]

Jere's full ig stories rant translated under cut + some explanations

1 - "It's K here, hello from the sinners side aka Vantaa. I have to come to SoMe for a moment, as people have asked me now 'now that Erika and Tommy Cash are going to ESC, whose side are you picking?' I can say that fuck, I won't pick either side. People have such a need to be like 'pick a side', fuck that! I don't have to pick a side, I have two great friends, Tommy and Erika going to the contest. I hope they both win. Would it be possible, if both of them get the same amount of points? Yes, it would be. The contest could be maybe held in the border of Finland and Estonia, so in Åland. So, my answer is that I'll be representing both, I'll be a manager for both, I'll be a psyschostatic (video cuts off)

2 - "So, I won't continue, the video cut off on purpose and that's good, some higher being probably meant it that way. A little statement, usually I don't like making those but now I will. There's been a lot happening and hype about Vikman's Ich Komme, that's great, and lots of fucking whining about sex over here and taxis over there (References to Nylon Beat's song 'Seksi vie ja taksi tuo' from 1999 which was a big radio hit despite the lyrics) and about shaking the stem of a peach. Fuck! People these days are made of sugar-bun-mash* shit, of course I have a little bit of sugar-bun-mash here, but I meant over here (points his head). Fuck, sometimes I wonder about this world and think I'd rather be a fucking alien, humans are so stupid, humans are so- fuck, sometimes it really gets me [mad]."

*sugar bun mash/pullamössö: When used to refer to people, refers to people who haven't had to live through tough times or work for their dreams (deragatory)

3 - "In addition to the previous, basically people get so offended about everything on behalf of others. (sighs) I've seen it myself on my journey nicely, I don't know how many times I've gotten hate thrown at me, whining and moaning from people about every single thing. (sighs again) Don't people have anything to do these days anymore? Can it be that people no longer have a meaning for their life, they don't have anything to do in their lives, but have a goddamn need to write all kinds of fucking stuff across the internet. (looong sigh) Yeah, the world is ruined, I say. That's no good."

4 - The story with the chocolate - This is a multilevel joke, he's playing Tunteisiin (Salatut Elämät theme song) after making a rant, mennä tunteisiin can also mean "get worked up emotionally" which he did in the stories. If somebody asks on the internet "menikö tunteisiin?" It's a sarcastic way to ask "u mad bro?"

[femmeinvelvet]

I've got the Stone Butch Blues Blues

By Raven Gildea, 2003, originally published on playbutch.com

Leslie Feinberg set me up.

Not set me up as in "set me up with a hot date." Set me up as in Catch 22, as in "any way you play, you lose," set me up.

It all started in 1993, when I first read Stone Butch Blues. Don't get me wrong, great book, I loved it. It meant a lot to me. I'd come of age as a queer in the early '80s, in a college edjumacated feminist-lesbian world where sex and power were evil tools of the patriarchy and butch sexual power simply didn't exist. Really, you had to be there to believe it. We were the Incredible Invisible Butches - but nobody ever used that word. We were so invisible we couldn't even see each other - or ourselves. Ten years of that, and Stone Butch Blues felt like a lightening bolt illuminating the landscape in which I'd been travelling blind. "Hey look, I'm a butch! Wow, that really explains a lot...."

Discovering a piece of butch history didn't just give me a new sense of identity. It also gave me permission to be stone. I mean hell, I thought I just didn't like sex. But once I realized that I could be a top and didn't have to roll over for reciprocation, I liked sex just fine. I liked it a lot. I gladly claimed my stone butch self.

There was just one problem. Other people read the book, too. People I was dating. And what struck them wasn't how stone was a perfectly valid way to be. What struck them was this: a true butch is stone, and anyone less than stone is less than butch. A stone butch will melt in the presence of true love and intimacy. Catch 22 — Feinberg set me up.

Feinberg's focus was butch/femme relationships, but it's not just femmes who got invested in the "I Can Heal Your Wounds" syndrome. True, many femmes who had survived the gender and sexuality vacuum of the '70s and '80s had epiphanies similar to mine when we dykes collectively rediscovered gender. And a lot of us took Feinberg's word as gospel in defining What is a Femme. But I've found that queers of all stripes hold the deeply cherished conviction that butches are broken and need to be fixed. Especially those of us who are stone. After all, we're reclaiming sex here. Isn't being stone proof that something is wrong?

The idea that butches are broken leads us to the idea that all stone butches really want is to find The One - the one who can feel our pain, heal our wounds, and make us whole. This sets up our lovers as well as us: they've got to either be The One, or be failures, and we've got to demonstrate that they aren't failures by ceasing to be stone. The subtext is: "Once I know I can trust my lover, I won't need to be stone, so of course I won't be." Which means, of course, that as long as I am stone, I'm demonstrating that I don't trust my lover. Not a good relationship dynamic if I happen to like being stone, if I choose to be stone, if I find it personally empowering, if that's how I feel sexy. Even less good if I can't be a True Butch in the eyes of my community without being stone, and I can't be a True Lover unless I melt.

It also means, if the one I'm with is The One, I must have been stone with everyone who came before. That might work just fine if you're monogamous. My observation is that someone who's monogamous and a romantic - and I think Feinberg's character Jess qualifies on both counts - can rationalize meeting The One at least four times without having any trouble sleeping at night. But me, I'm a slut. A non-monogamous slut at that, and let me tell you, overlapping saves all kinds of time. I've dated approximately three people a year for the last twenty years. Even if you don't count the relationships that lasted less than six months, it's pretty clear that they can't all be The One.

Oh, but they all wanted to be. Feinberg set them up, too. During seven years as a stone top, I dated only two people who weren't invested in hearing that I'd been 100 percent stone 100 percent of the time until I met them. I dated only two people who didn't want me to roll over and spread my legs to prove it.

Now, let's be real, this is not entirely Feinberg's fault. After all, Stone Butch Blues is a novel. We were the ones who decided it was the word from on high. But who could blame us, really? A long line of butch mentoring had been broken, and those of us who had somehow turned out butch in spite of being maligned, reviled, and rendered invisible were hungry for someone to tell us how it's done. All we'd heard so far was "Butch is an oppressive reproduction of heterosexist patriarchal roles. Shape up and start acting like a girl. Oh, but could you fuck me first? Don't tell my friends, okay?"

It's no wonder that we took the only burning bush in that desert and invested it with the power of gospel. We youngsters were creating a culture based on something we'd never seen before. We failed to notice that there were a lot of different ways of being butch. We took the only blueprint we had, and engraved it in, well, stone.

And the blueprint said: "Thou shalt be stone until you find the one who heals your wounds and makes you whole." But even if you are the coupling type — and let's face it, many of us are not - what if you like being stone?

I'm not stone because I'm damaged. I'm stone because most of the time I like fucking other people a lot more than I like getting fucked. I have more fun that way. Having permission to be stone allowed me to finally really enjoy having sex, and I'm not going let anyone take that away from me. I don't want someone to heal my wounds. I want lovers who can give me room in bed to be sexy, and fully present, and fully myself, all at the same time. It was being stone that made me whole.

For a while I thought that the solution was to date pillow queens. I've heard a lot of talk in the past few years about pillow queens. It's never said like it's a good thing to be. After years of being pressured to flip, I had to wonder: what's wrong with a pillow queen? Hell, bedding someone who doesn't expect me to do things I don't want to do sounds delightful to me. But being stone doesn't mean I don't have needs. It took me a while to figure out that there is a difference between a pillow-munching bottom and a pillow queen. The difference is the word "queen," as in entitlement. A bottom is invested in making sure the top has a good time. A pillow queen is convinced that if she's having a good time, everyone else in the room must be, too.

The girl who expected me to go down on her all night, but wouldn't suck my dick? Pillow queen. The boi who, after I'd spent hours on my knees with my fist in his cunt, wanted me to give him a backrub? Pillow queen.

It's not that I think my lovers should be dripping with gratitude because I deigned to fuck them. I'm just saying that there are a lot of different kinds of reciprocation. I may not want to receive the same things I give my partners - after all, I tend to be a top, and they tend to be bottoms - but I do want my relationships to be equitable. No, I don't want to lie on my back with my legs in the air, and yes, I can have a completely satisfying sexual experience without ever taking off my pants. But I do have needs. I do want my output of energy to be met. I don't want a relationship that's a one-way valve, sucking me dry. But my needs are my needs, and I want them met on my terms. I don't want my partner, guided by some book about someone else's experience, to define them for me.

The narrative of stone butch mystique says that in exchange for sexual pleasure, my lover is responsible for creating a safe space for me to experience my pain. Hold it right there. What if I don't want to experience my pain? What if I don't want to process my emotions? Being expected to give it up emotionally can be as big a problem as enforced sexual reciprocation. Let's face it folks, there are emotional pillow queens as well as sexual ones.

I'm not saying that I'm never vulnerable. I sure as hell am, even though some would take away my butch card for admitting it. But I get the safety to show my vulnerability through lack of expectation. No expectation to be invulnerable, tough, baddass. No expectation to break down and cry just so someone else can be assured that they're being adequately supportive. I don't want to make myself vulnerable on demand just because it's on someone else's agenda. If I'm not feeling vulnerable, or if I'm feeling too vulnerable to show it, it's not a dysfunction. Nor is it an indictment of my partner. In fact, could be it's not about my partner at all. Remember, we are talking about my needs here. If this is about doing something for me, it needs to include things I actually want.

And speaking of needs, I'm pretty damn tired of hearing that stone butches need to be fucked, but we just don't know it. I call this one the myth of rebirth. You know, the idea that once we're properly fucked we'll be suddenly re-born as the penetration-hungry sluts we were always meant to be. Excuse me, but last time I checked, biology was still not destiny. Possession of my very own cunt does not obligate me to put things into it, and the words "I know what you need" are just as insulting when dykes say them as they are when men do.

Actually, I know perfectly well when I want to be fucked. But if and when I want it, it's on my terms, when the time is right, when I'm ready. I can enjoy and appreciate being fucked without wanting to do it very often. Getting fucked can feel good, and it might even make me come. But it doesn't make me feel powerful. It doesn't make me feel sexy. It doesn't make me feel that I'm fully inhabiting my body. Usually it makes me feel terrified. Mind you, I'm a perv. I know that on occasion, abject terror can be a good thing. But only if it's freely chosen and carefully negotiated. If I go there, it won't be on demand, and it won't be to prove my love. When I say in a clear and direct way that stone is working just fine for me, it's a boundary — not a challenge.

Of course, not all butches are tops, and not all butch tops are stone. Nor does stone have to mean all the time, every time, eternally. Far be it from me to say that no bottom should ever offer to flip a butch top, or that a bottom whose offer is declined should never ask again. Desire is slippery and malleable, and I'd like to think we are entitled to a little complexity. But if a butch top does flip, it might not be an earth-shattering revelation of trust and intimacy. It might not mean anything, other than "I want you to fuck me now."

Butch tops who aren't stone got set up, too. I've heard plenty of butches complain: "I told my girlfriend 'no' once, and she never tried again." Well c'mon, guys - let's not let our butch mystery prevent us from getting what we want in bed. Isn't that what it's for? It would be great if our lovers could read our minds - some of the time — but until that day comes, we're just going to have to talk to them. When I want someone to fuck me — and I have done my share of time on my hands and knees with my ass in the air — I let them know what I want in a clear, direct way. Like, for instance, "I want you to fuck me now." Try it, it's very effective.

Effective, but not necessarily easy. Being up front about our desire can be difficult when the common belief is that anyone less than stone is less than butch. Butches who want to be fucked shouldn't lose butch credibility because of it. No, wait: no one who wants to be fucked should lose credibility because of it.

Let's not waste any more time tearing each other down over what we want, in or out of bed. There are plenty of people willing to do that for us. For me, butch pride has been hard-won. Every day I've got someone trying to give me girl lessons. Because I also identify as trans and genderqueer, I often have dykes trying to give me lesbian lessons, and FTMs trying to tell me why and how I should be a man. And then there's the competition between us butches: our favorite game seems to be "Who is the Real Butch?" Not a Real Butch, the Real Butch. After all, it is universally acknowledged that there can be only one Real Butch in any room, virtual or otherwise. Our queer culture's Pavlovian response to butchness seems to be whipping out our yardsticks to see who measures up. Doesn't leave a whole lot of room for mentoring, does it?

Somewhere along the line, butch has become one of the most fenced in, closely guarded identities in the fenced in, closely guarded world of identity politics. I can hear the litany now: "Real butches only date femmes. Real butches are tops. Real butches are stone. Real butches don't cook, sew, cry, read, talk, feel...." Apparently the only two things a real butch can do are fuck femmes and work on engines. Oh, and drink. Let's not forget that one. Butch has become so narrowly defined that it's a wonder anyone claims the identity at all. The liberation I once felt at being given permission to be myself has somehow transformed into a dangerous high-wire act. Step out of line once, and SPLAT! Your reputation is ruined for good.

We've got a set-up that hurts us all, but it's not too late to change it. I want us to stop thinking of being stone as either a requirement for being butch, or some sort of pathology. I want us to stop seeing getting fucked as either a requirement for intimacy, or some sort of breakthrough. I want allies who aren't invested in telling me what I need and how to get it. I'm able to identify and willing to state what I need, and I want some credit and respect when I do. I want allies who will read Stone Butch Blues not as a rulebook, but as a starting place. I want allies who aren't invested in telling me how to be butch. I want allies who will stand beside me while I'm doing what butches have always done — saying, "To hell with the rules, I'm gonna be myself."

[nkogneatho]

high school was boring as it was when you were the class nerd. you never got bullied but a part of you wish you did so you had friends to defend you. yeah. friends. you were also all alone. i mean who wants to be friends with a girl who is the class topper. basically everyone else's competition. so when everyone mass bunked the class for a party, it was just you sitting by the window. your professor suggested you leave to since he cannot just teach an entire syllabus to one student, but you insisted to stay.

you popped your earphones, playing mazzy star's fade into you as you revised your notes. your eyes wandered to look at sky through the window. the trees swaying. it was early spring so the air was still a bit chilly. but the sun shone on everything, tall trees casting shadows on the ground. just then, you spotted this boy outside. dark haired, tall and muscly. you couldn't make out his expression. or the color of his eyes. suddenly, he looked up making eye contact with you. you quickly looked away, heat rushing to your cheeks, heart beating faster.

shit. he must think i am a weirdo for staring at him.

but you couldn't resist. curiosity is one son of a bitch. so you look back and you found his eyes still on you. it was awkward. what the hell was this situation anyway. so to ease it, you gave him a small warm smile. he didn't reciprocate it.

great. i am definitely a weirdo now.

but then after a few seconds, his lips stretched into a thin line before he walked away. you have no idea what happened but for the first time your heart felt warm.

when you got home, you found yourself replaying those few seconds like a tiktok edit.

he was cute. wait what? fuck. i should get back to studying.

the next day, the professor was babbling on about a chapter that you already studied in advance. so you once again found yourself looking outside the window with a hope of spotting the same guy. but he wasn't there. maybe that's the most of interaction with him you'll get in life.

when the bell rang for break, you decided to have your lunch somewhere quieter. like on the school terrace. you plopped yourself on the ground, back pressed against the wall. before you could take the first bite off your taiyaki, you heard a familiar faint melody. your legs were drawn to it, following the soft hum, to meet the same guy you saw yesterday. a part of your heart blossomed. he looked peaceful under the shadow of the wall, his phone playing the same song you were listening to yesterday. fade into you. you still couldn't see his eyes. but he did have a scar on the corner of his lips. you don't know what ad gotten into you but you got closer to his face to inspect it further. and in a second, you felt a strong grip on your arm, pulling you closer and making you lose balance as you fell on him.

"it's rude to stare a stranger, you know?" his voice wasn't too rugged but wasn't sweet either.

"i—i wasn't staring. just...curious."

"yeah? haven't you heard of that saying? curiosity killed the cat." he purred. you took a deep breath. and that's when you noticed he wasn't wearing the school uniform.

"where's your uniform?"

"there we go. curious again?" he waited for an answer but he knew he wasn't getting that until he gives you one. "i don't study here. jus'like hanging out cuz it's quite." the sentence surely held a lot of context but you noticed he didn't seem like he wanted to go there. "how long are you planning on lyin' on top of me?" oh shit right. the school bell rang once again. break's over.

"sorry. i didn't—anyways i should go." you apologized as you got up, fixing your skirt.

"in case you get curious again, the name's toji." he smiled, hands in his pocket as he watched you walk towards the door. you turn around.

green. his eyes are emerald green.

"see you around, toji."

[lucinedoodles]

Xiu Ying "de Riva" x Lucanis Dellamorte

Quick background on Xiu Ying- she's an OC I use for video games and is basically a foreigner in the land of Thedas, banished there for abusing her powers as a minor deity in her own world. She is a fox spirit and before the events of Inquisition, she saved a few Dalish children from a demon. In doing so, she used up too much magical/life energy and ended up reverting back into the form of a baby fox. A baby fox is how she stayed throughout the events of the Inquisition, chilling out in Inquisitor Lavellan's pocket.

Xiu Ying realised she was falling in love when Lucanis described a first kiss as honey and lavender cream- the same drink her Dalish clan used the feed her when she was a very young fox kit.

It may have been love at first sight for Lucanis. Let's face it, the man has been imprisoned for a year and Rook was the first friendly face he saw AND she was busting him out of there? But he was wary of her and her intentions since she's a famous Courtesan who has a history of charming important people.

The whole Lighthouse been knew. They were taking bets and Davrin was getting pretty sick of the will they, won't they. They get together officially after Caterina was saved.

Sort of? She's not really an Antivan Crow. She was a useful agent for them and Viago handed her the emergency adoption papers after an incident where the Antivan King was offended when she spurned his advances. She may or may not have orchestrated that incident, knowing Viago would step in to help her. Xiu Ying likes the Crows as individuals but isn't very impressed by them as a faction. Too much backstabbing and idealism with the way they gloss over the horrific nature of their training and lifestyle.

Xiu Ying pretends to be Dalish, she takes on the appearance of a Dalish elf and observes their practices when convenient. She's a social chameleon and will do whatever it takes to fit in. She does teach Lucanis some of the recipes she remembers from Clan Lavellan though.

She's admitted to him that when she's around someone, she will always become the kind of person they would like. She no longer knows who she is when she takes the mask off. So Lucanis starts helping her find her own interest again, teaching her to cook and joining Bellara's book club and etc.

For a courtesan, Xiu Ying is surprisingly chaste with her affections. A kiss on the cheek and maybe holding his hand when they're out in public. In private, she's always careful to make sure Lucanis is comfortable with whatever happens.

A romantic dinner for two (and Spite), with candles and peonies, ending with a warm cup of cream with honey and lavender for her and a cup of coffee for him.

Xiu Ying doesn't take Lucanis any more than the others. Mostly because, she likes coming back to the Lighthouse and making a beeline for the kitchen for a freshly made snack. She's also as free flowing with praise for Lucanis in battle as he is for her.

He calls her "my love" and she calls him "vhenan" (illario calls her "cara" but we don't talk about him)

Getting either of them to say it is like pulling teeth but Xiu Ying blurts it out after she was pulled out of the Regret Prison.

So many. Mostly directed at Illario and Viago.

Honestly can't think of any atm lol

She got him a miniature wyvern. She had an Orlesian client who was trying to breed mini wyverns as pets and he may have lost a leg and an eye, but he did it.

Panic and fear. One moment they were victorious and the next, Rook is gone and no one can find her. She's in the Fade and may never be seen again.

Mildly annoyed. She's confident she can find her way out but she already hated Solas for dating and then dumping her adoptive sister. She would have been more stressed had she known how much time was passing in the real world.

The fact that despite everything that has happened to him, Lucanis is still capable of caring and looking after those around him. He loves her because of how much she cares for those around her and how fiercely she's willing to protect them. She waged war against Solas to protect her adoptive sister, she nearly ripped Ghilan'nain apart for attacking Harding and she tore through Blight and Death when she saw Bellara was still alive.

They visit Clan Lavellan, secretly elope while they're there and write to Viago and Teia that they're not coming back to Antiva before fuckin off to go watch wild wyverns.

Questions for your Rook and their partner:

Does your Rook fall for their partner at first sight? If not, what moment made your Rook realize they're in love with them?

When does the partner realize that they're in love with Rook?

How long does it take for them to officially get together? Did any of the other Lighthouse members have any suspicions beforehand?

Do your Rook and their partner share the same faction? If so, does that affect their relationship at all? If not, what is your Rook's opinion of their partner's faction? What is the partner's opinion of Rook's faction?

Do they have different cultural backgrounds (e.g. a Rook who was raised in Antiva with Harding who was raised in Ferelden)? If so, do they ever share parts of their culture with each other? If they're similar, how do they celebrate their culture together?

What is their favorite thing to do together? Do they share any hobbies? Does your Rook teach their partner their own hobbies? Does the partner teach Rook theirs?

Are they a physically affectionate couple? Are they fine displaying those affections in public or do they prefer to be in private? If they're not, how do they prefer to show their love instead?

What does their ideal date look like? Do they go on much?

Does your Rook bring them out often? How are they like on the battlefield? Do they banter much?

Do they have any nicknames for each other? Who uses terms of endearment more?

Who says "I love you" first? What is the other's reaction? Who thinks it first?

Any inside jokes?

What song(s) do you associate with them?

Does your Rook get their partner any other gifts (besides the one already in-game)? Does the partner get Rook any? Any gifts that are particularly special?

What was the partner's reaction to Rook being imprisoned in the Fade? How did they cope? How did they react upon seeing Rook again?

How did your Rook react to getting trapped in the Fade and separated from their partner?

What is your Rook's favorite thing about their partner? What is the partner's favorite thing about Rook?

When all is said and done, where would they like to retire together? Is marriage in the cards for them? Children? Pets?

[drdemonprince]

do you think it's worth it being nonbinary if you dont have like, body/physical dysphoria? Ive been identifying as nonbinary since i was 14 and when i was in high school it was great, i had my little liberal bubble queer friend group, and the rest of the school didnt pay much attention to me. My mom accepted me in the "i dont get it but whatever i dont want you to stop talking to me so i guess ill go along with it" sense, which while not perfect, its fine. But last september i started studying engineering and. Its really not going well. Like 85% of my classmates are straight guys and they range from thinking nonbinary people are cringe (and therefore they make fun of me when i walk by) to being extremely transphobic (im very scared of some of them.) And ive been trying to make friends with the girls in my class, and some of them are nice, but i can tell they also dont like that im nonbinary. One of them literally told me "i get that being a woman is hard, i dont like having periods or the ways guys look at me either, but you dont gain anything by denying yourself". So. I kind of think about that nearly every night now. Doubting whether im really nonbinary. And it really doesnt help knowing that basically every girl here either thinks that or just straight up thinks im gross and weird, ive literaly heard one of them go 'what is THAT doing in the womens' when i walked past her from the bathroom. I dont like going to class much.

Im thinking of detransisioning, i guess. I never started taking hormones (good luck getting those in eastern europe lol), so I could easily start looking like a cis girl again. These will be my coworkers and bosses, i cant live like this until i retire. i want to have fun uni experiences too. And ive been thinking so much lately about why im even doing this. Its just a few words that people call me by. Theres nonbinary people who use binary pronouns and pass as cis, i could be one of them and just not tell anyone that im actually nb. but on the other hand, it feels like im giving up on the trans community if i do this. Giving up on activism. Im sure im not the only one in this situation, if i detransition ill be letting them down completely. I dont want the next generation to be as fucked as this one. Also i came out very publicly to my entire class (i wanted to find other queer people to be friends with, i hoped that would do the trick maybe. I was so naive and stupid) and it will be so fucking humiliating to go back on that and im scared ill do all that and theyll keep treating me the same anyways because im already "tainted" by transness. So i would let so many people down for nothing.

The one other trans friend from my high school friend group solved this issue by paying more than ten fucking thousand euros per year to study in the netherlands btw. The exchange rate to our currency makes it somehow even worse than it sounds. Hes probably going to be able to start taking hormones before he gets his bachelors. I wish my mom was that rich :|

First of all, I want to say that I am so sorry anon that you are facing so much fucking exclusion and harassment. That kind of treatment pushes a lot of trans people into detransitioning, and it is brutal, and that this experience can happen to nonbinary people who are not on hormones but have otherwise transitioned is something that does not get acknowledged enough.

I can't tell you what you should do in your situation, because no outcome is great. But I think you might find some elements of this article from Kier Adrian Grey on ceasing their use of they/them pronouns (among the cis public!) interesting. They're an "ex anarchist" and a bit of an anti social justice dogma kinda person so I don't agree with them on many things, but I did like this point that they made:

"Hear me out: maybe the best way to understand they/them pronouns, within the context of a pluralistic democracy, is as a subcultural norm, a way for LGBT people to show respect for one another within our community. That sense of belonging I felt when I first found queer spaces was profound, and if using gender-neutral pronouns gives someone that gift, I am all for it. "But I do wonder if we are setting people up for hardship when we tell them that they should hope for, expect, or insist on they/them pronouns being used by everyone they encounter, and that they will be emotionally injured every time this fails to happen. In my thirteen years, misgendering was rarely malicious, and yet it still fed into a wounded identity and a suspicious worldview."

I don't think that what Kier has written about their experience applies to even most nonbinary people, and if taken too prescriptively by the wrong people it could be an awful dysphoria cope that leads a person to some pretty dark places. But! For someone whose feelings about it all are like Kier's, and whose life experiences have given them similar perspective, I think there is something to it. It's true that thinking a great deal about how one is gendered by others is crazy making and sometimes isolating, and if that's the sole way in which one's transness interfaces with the world, it's not always to the person's net benefit.

Here's the full piece:

I will say that based on all you had to say, anon, it would be a lot better for you if you could get around a lot of queer and trans people! What you're struggling with is not being seen and appreciated for who you are, and all the cis people undermining you are driving you crazy and making you doubt yourself. I'd MUCH prefer if you could find more local queer community or relocate if necessary to feel more appreciated as you are.

BUT if you find yourself resonating with this author's points and it feels like only being out to other trans and queer people would be good for you, that is okay to do. That isn't "detransitioning," it's being choosy about whom you trust. And many of us navigate those decisions. I'm not out as trans to everyone I meet! Most people just think I'm a cis guy. The big difference between you and me is that I have medically transitioned (and if you want to, I recommend ordering some hormones on India Mart!!!). You have some choices here about how much information you give to other people, how much you trust people who are incredibly ignorant, how much you will expose yourself to harm by making requests for treatment that might not happen, and how to build the community you need to survive this awful transphobic reality.

[menlove]

youve probably answered this before but what DO you think is the most realistic version of what went down?? like do you think paul misinterpreted john's hints or that john never made it clear enough to paul how he felt? i know theres no way to know but you have such a good grasp on their personalities and this seriously might haunt me forever lkadjf

i actually don't think i have ! i wrote a lil speculative Thing about what things would look like if paul were queer and closeted (which is what i think) and that interpretation but never specifically this question but...

this is long and rambly but have my thoughts lmfao

basically To Me i do think they had some sort of sexual relationship. to me it's honestly the most likely scenario given the..... everything. their interactions with each other, some of their songs about each other ("i used to hold you in my arms"), the way things blew up so spectacularly, etc. and my reasoning there is mostly that. we know already that they had really loose sexual boundaries with each other. they jerked off together, they fucked women in the same room together & allegedly together as well. and already just those two/three things constitute as a sexual relationship, but not smth they would've seen as one.

but i do think they did more than that. i mean, it doesn't really matter if they did more than that, the rest of what i'm gonna speculate stands even if all they ever did was jerk off together and fuck women together, but like... aside from the like Mountains of evidence that there was something there, i just think it makes sense w their personalities. john isn't the type of person to have self-restraint and i don't think paul, especially when he was younger, would've turned john down. i think if john was into men (which he was, we know this) and if he was into paul (incredibly likely) then he would've made a move. and i think if he made a move and got rejected he would have raised hell, and that never happened.

i think they probably started doing shit together (again, the extent of that is debatable) and they absolutely did Not think of it as being anything queer. i couldn't tell you the mental loops they tied themselves in there, but i have Some thoughts just based on who they are. i think john probably passed it off as like "a hand's a hand, a mouth's a mouth" type of thing (which is hilariously something yoko talks about him saying in her audio diary during the white album sessions). and i think paul probably saw it (& any other things he was doing with men, if he did) as something fun that feels good and isn't something he needs to like look into deeply. i think neither of them would've thought of themselves as queer, bc they probably thought of queerness as very binary- you're either gay or you're straight. and they both were into women (.....ostensibly) so they couldn't be gay. i think john like realized, on some level, that he was queer and Hated it about himself for a very long time and only started coming to grips with it towards the end of his life. i think paul eventually came around to it but by that time he was married to linda (& if rumors are to believed, possibly having threesomes with her and men lmfao) & i don't think he would Ever want to come out publicly even if he's out privately (which i do think he is).

so why didn't they get together? why is paul so insistent that john was straight and not in love with him? i think they just genuinely never talked about it. ever. like i don't think they had that conversation. if neither of them were gay and their sexual relationship was just john and paul things, there wasn't any need to talk about it. queerness was more acceptable for the young. not in an open sort of way, absolutely not, but in the way that they could tell themselves they'd grow out of it, they were just messing around, etc.

i think things got harder when brian died- he died queer, alone, and in a situation that a lot of people thought was suicide. and ofc, we know the band didn't think it was suicide, and i don't think it was either, but that's the kind of thing that sticks in the back of your mind. esp if you're like john who had a lot of mystical/magical thinking. i think it was a bit of a wake up call. time to grow up. i think they both thought they were each the Only one dealing with actual queer feelings & attraction to the other and were soooo sure the other one was just straight and fucking around. which probably hurt, quite a bit, but wasn't something they wanted to look at anyway.

and when john got with yoko and got serious with her, i think that was the bubble bursting. cynthia was different. they got together so young, he never made her a priority, he cheated on her constantly, belittled her, didn't have a place for her by his side bc he carved that space out exclusively for paul. and you can tell that just by the amount of quotes paul has about john marrying yoko being the catalyst, about it being time to grow up, etc which is insane considering he was already married and so were george and ringo. for years. so it was something deeper than that. and it's bc he was actually taking yoko seriously. paul's spot as john's primary partner got filled by a woman. who john was genuinely in love with, not like cynthia which was a marriage fueled by the age old tale of an unplanned pregnancy and comphet. and paul can't argue with that. like....... if he viewed what they were doing as messing around as kids, with john being straight and him being the one pining, he wouldn't want to fuck up john's chance at a Normal Straight Love. if he were a girl, he could, but he wasn't. what he Could do was match him and grow up too. cue the immediate pivot to get married and have children, eventually fulfilled in linda.

but i don't think he expected the band to implode just bc they stopped being so close in whatever manner. but it did. along with other reasons, obviously- there's a million reasons the band broke up, but i think they could've weathered it if they had kept the closeness they'd had at the beginning. or if they'd been single or even if they'd just kept viewing each other as their primary partner aside from their wives.

i think they both came to terms with what they actually meant to each other in the 70s, but they never actually... told each other. what we have from john is jealous guy, which paul was allegedly told was about him, and that demo version of real love that paul never even heard where he laments about him having a baby/farm and how he used to hold him. there's also (just like) starting over, but that one's easy to see as being for yoko too and paul wouldn't have thought twice about it. then you have now & then and real love, which were on that damn tape for paul :( like he literally didn't hear them until after john died and we know he likes the idea that now & then is about him but even then he doesn't sound totally convinced

for paul we have a lot. but a lot of his like more vulnerable songs were only released after john died. like here today, obviously, but there's also some pretty telling ones that john never would've heard (like best friend, which he played live, but wasn't on any album until 2018. or a more of a Stretch of one but i 100% think is about john, hey diddle, which was kept off ram and only released in 2001).

so like i think they very much both came to grips with the fact that they had been in love with each other, but they never really.... thought that could be returned. so ofc paul's going to say shit like how he likes the theory that john was in love with him or wrote now & then about him. but he doesn't believe it, because to him john was Genuinely straight and he was the weird one. and vice versa. i think i saw a more recent thing from him coming around more on the idea of john being bi, but honestly i think that's just hard for him to come to grips with bc what the hell are you supposed to do with that? like yeah, he was into men, possibly even romantically, on a genuine level, just not him? that's hurtful. i don't think he wants to think of that option. bc that's more likely to him than the idea that john was in love with him and hiding it the whole time. which is also heartbreaking. bc then it's just a tragedy of circumstances and missed chances- which is what i think it was. and neither of those routes are something i think he wants to consider, so john has to be straight in his mind.

but if he's coming around on that, he's probably coming around on one of those two options. i hope it's the latter bc the idea that he'd think even now that john never loved him is just so fucking sad. and considering his comments about now & then, as well as the lyrics video for now & then, i really do think the latter is more likely.

anywayyyyy tl;dr i think they fucked around sexually in Some Way, never said a single thing romantically, both came to terms w their feelings in the 70s but by then it was too late and they didn't think the other one would reciprocate anyway, and now paul's been trying to come to grips w the ambiguity of their relationship for the last 40+ years.

[a-continuous-cutting-motion]

Context: I asked in the comments if @ms-demeanor would like advice from someone else in the industry, and she said yes - my response turned into something too long for a comment, so I am reblogging instead.

-

Okay!

So, background on me - I managed a help desk for a while and had to take it from "broken" to "fixed" (and mostly succeeded!). Presently I am a consultant with some juniors under me that tell me they like how I lead them. I also just usually am viewed as someone who gets a lot done with minimal friction at my job and manage to not get stressed out at MSPs, so hopefully this is useful.

I am not gonna cover every topic you mentioned in your post - I think most of it you solved for youself through the power of posting. Two things stand out to me that might be helpful to cover - the small problem of the way the ticketing system is configured, and the large problem of being the designated "bag holder" at your organization.

First, let's talk about the ticketing system - you might know this already, but tickets are often divided into one of three categories: 1) event, 2) problem, and 3) service request. Events are 'something happened!', Problems are 'something keeps happening!', and Service Requests are "Nothing happened, but I need someone to do something anyways."

Your ticket seems to be treating everyhing as Events, which are generally small issues that can be addressed one-by-one, and very often are going to be the same stuff you've seen 100 times before. (80/20 Rule) This happens a lot, because ticketing systems are usually meant to facilitate Tier 1/2 activities first and foremost.

You seem to be handling a combination of Problems and Service Requests. Problems are persistent issues that keep cropping up and are hard to resolve. They naturally are long running tasks with limited options for resolution. They often do not move fast, because they are the kind of thing that requires a lot of pondering and false starts to work through. Service Requests are likewise generally not urgent, and are either open-ended solution-seeking or rote tasks done in anticipation of some coming event (such as a new employee starting).

You should be able to request the ticketing software manager (please tell me it's not you!) implement two new ticket categories with different SLAs and notification profiles that are more in line with the needs of the types of tasks you seem to be saddled with. What, exactly, those settings might be is going to depend on the nature of the Problems you see come across you desk, but you can probably figure out what's actually useful on your own.

Okay, that's one problem talked to death! Onto the bigger problem - Delegation and escalation! This is much less self-contained of a problem, so this may be a bit less cut and dry advice:

So, delegation and escalation are both hard, and leaving things on your plate when you can't just work through them right away is hard too. You are, to put it a certain way, the person left "holding the bag", and it is full of your organization's technical debt. The first thing I would do is remind yourself of that frequently. When I was in your position in last jobs, I got a lot of mileage out of "if they truly wanted it done faster that I can do it, they'd hire two of me!"

First, lets tackle delegation - the first thing to know is that there are two kinds of tasks. There are tasks you can fuck up, and tasks you can't. Tasks you can fuck up include researching, note taking, drafting, and so on - things where if the person doing them turns out to be a complete fucking moron, all you've wasted is a complete fucking moron's time. Tasks you can't fuck up are things like proof-reading, data entry, configuration and implementation, etc. Things where it will cause Problems if you don't get it right the first time. You can delegate both, but it's better to delgate the tasks you can fuck up first, before you trust people with getting their hands dirty.

The second thing to know is that there's always another junior. It's good to give juniors opportunities to develop their skills and learn more, but if they don't work out, you can probably find someone else for less effort than it would take to do all the necessary work to turn them into a competent resource who understands what you want. People don't have to be perfect right away, but if it just doesn't click for them on some level, don't bother exhausting yourself trying to get their style to suit yours. They're better off finding their own area of expertise. (If you don't have juniors available, express the need to your boss, and refer back to the "I am all they got and I am trying my best and doing a good job at it." mantra from above. One person can only do so much.)

This a good segue in escalation! First - it is really hard! You are arguing uphill against an entire organization's worth of inertia, and if your boss was aligned with what your needs were, they would already be met! You have to do all the corporate bullshit of "speaking their language" when you do it - your boss can best advocate for your intiatives if she is already given the argument she needs to use to HER boss. You might understand that something is truly fucking over the company, but if you can't turn that argument into dollars and cents/business strategic goals/'efficencies and synergies', it won't get traction above a VP, and if it requires organizational change it MUST have that buy-in. You're dead in the water if you need to change how other business units function and you can't justify the time and energy spent doing so. (This is where good juniors come in handy - if you have a couple juniors who understand your vision and can make a decent powerpoint, THEY can write the argument for you and you can send it up the chain.)

This leaves us with the things that you know need doing, but you simply don't have the time/resources/spoons to do. This is where you throw them all on a projects board and assign priority to them and prod at the high priority stuff as you have time. Again - they can support you better if they want more than that, and if they don't want to do it, then it must not be very important.

Okay, that's my post! let me know if that is helpful! I am worried it will be stuff you already know or isn't really relevant, but eh… it was fun to write and might help someone else in this stupid industry.

"Every day I get emails" but not in the funny ha ha work sucks I know way more in the ADHD horror story this is legitimately causing problems for me at work way.

[annoyinglilbro]

Angel who is so dainty and oh so genderless, "I don't do labels" until the demon forcemascs the shit out of him is that anything

They also beat the shit out of each other with flaming swords and twisted daggers because why not

The demon has been watching them for awhile. Everytime he thinks he knows, he doesn’t. The curves are soft, hair short, eyes round and doey. His lips are pouted and chest is flat. Their voice doesn’t give anything away either, and really all the demon wants to know is what’s under that stupid Lacey gown. Ofcourse he isn’t ever expecting the angel to let him see, they’re constantly at each others throats.

“Hey pretty bird, gonna sing a song for me today?” He asks when the angel walks by, only scoffing and rolling their eyes.

“Why would I ever sing for you? You’re not worthy. You’re damned already, there’s nothing I could sing for you.”

Demon Hums but continues his stride by their side. This is routine. He’ll hang around, push some buttons, just enough to watch that face turn red and words turn truely spiteful.

“Give me a chance and I’ll make you sing real pretty for me, doll. Just gotta get you out of those clothes. What’s an angel look like under those wraps anyway?”

The angel pulls their clothes tighter to their body, cheeks heating up a light pink and lips turning to a frown.

“Come on, I’m sure you’re a real pretty girl under there.” The angel glares, making the demon put his hands up in surrender. “Or boy. You’re a real pretty boy, aren’t you?” That gets a different reaction. A spark of something in the angel eyes.

“I’m not a girl or a boy. Angels are genderless, regardless of what’s under our uniforms. We don’t do labels, there’s no need. Sex is a sin.”

“Oh I think you’re wrong there, sweet boy. I think you know you’re a boy but you’re just too scared to say it. Come on, no one else is here. You can say it. You a pretty boy?”

It happens fast. The fist that makes contact with his face, drawing blood from his nose and lip. He’s stood in shock, watching the way the angels lip trembles and their chest heaves.

“Didn’t think you had it in you, pretty boy.” The demon quips, wiping away the stray stream of red with his thumb.

“Stop it. You’ll get me introuble. We’re not supposed to…want those things. Okay? Please for once will you just drop it?”

Ofcourse he doesn’t. He grabs the dainty boy by his arm and drags him into an empty alley. Slams him into a wall and points a silver dagger just under his chin. The Angel looks at him, wide eyed and shivering under his touch.

“Everything’s a sin with you angels, isn’t it? Always denying yourself the simple pleasures. You lot wouldn’t be so stuck up if you just learned to enjoy the little things. Like having your cock played with.” His hand is slipping through the robes, feeling between the angels legs and into his cunt. His fingers dance over his little dick, perked and hidden under the hood. The way the Angel gasps and tries to throw his head back further against the brick wall makes the demon throb in his pants. “There it is. Your pretty little cock, probably so neglected. Tell me do you ever touch it? Ever give it any attention? What do you when you feel that ache between your legs?” His fingers continue working at him the entire time.

“I…I don’t do anything I..I’m not su-supposed to hmmm…”

“Don’t lie to me, Angel. What do you do, really, when your little cock gets hard and your cunt gets all wet.”

The angel bites his lip, looking to the side.

“I…sometimes I’ll rub against m-my pillow…I don’t mean to though! My clit just gets so- ah!!” He’s cut off by a pinch to the sensitive bundle.

“That’s not your clit, baby boy. That’s your cock. You’ll address it as such, cause you’re a pretty boy right? And that’s what boys have, cocks.”

“We’re..we’re not supposed to lean towards either gender- fuck! Please please please!!” Another harsh pinch, fingers that tug. It brings tears to the angels eyes.

“Stop denying yourself. Let it feel good. Let yourself be who you really are. What are you?”

The angel whines, body shaking against the wall and face bright red. His hips have started moving against the hand between his legs.

“I’m..I’m a boy! I’m a boy, I know it. I know I’m a boy, okay? I know I am. But I can’t, you wouldn’t understand! I can’t just be that, okay! I could lose my wings, my halo, I could fall.”

The demon leans in, pointed teeth now against the angels neck.

“I think you’ll find there’s worse things in life than falling. But I get it. That’s fine. How about when it’s just us, you’re a boy? Does that sound good, baby?” He sinks his teeth into the pale skin between his neck and shoulder, marking his claim on the boy.

The angel lets out a choked sob, legs shaking when he cums against the demons fingers. He’s slumped into his body, energy drained and fight gone.

“What could you possibly understand about what I’m going through?” He mumbles, head against the demons shoulder now. The blade is still pressed against his skin but he doesn’t care much for it now. It’s an after thought, an empty threat.

The demon doesn’t say anything, just grabs the angels hand and slides it down his pants. The angel gasps when he feels the familiar slit and button like dick. He leans back to meet his eyes, and the demon just smiles.

“Not all sinners are born this way. Some of us were song birds once too.”