#I don't post but i am beyond pissed right now

[jollyhunter]

24 Kinky Days with Dean x reader - Day 13.

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Pairing: Dean Winchester x fem!reader

Warnings: NSFW - MDNI! - includes explicit sexual content. It's a kinky writing challenge, so expect anything at this point, (nothing freaky, don't worry) but it's a surprise calendar so I won't spoil it! (Also, English is not my native language) Contains brief reference to Dec.11 (Temptation)

Summary: You and Dean manage to piss off an Amor and in return he "gifts" you with a life-swap with two strangers for the next hours. Not much of a deal for you two, you think. You're hunters after all, so how bad could it be? Oh how wrong you were. Remember one of Dean's biggest fears? Yeah. About that.

Words: 3,100

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Feedback and reblogs are highly appreciated! And let me know whether you enjoy it so far! <3 A/N: Alrighty, this was a bit of a wild ride.

I really need to write less and yet I end up writing more every time and keep screwing up my sleeping schedule damn it. This is the first time I've written this much dialogue. :') I'm still new to writing fanfics and now I'm a bit anxious about posting it haha. I really hope I got Dean right - I didn't get to proof read it yet, so maybe I'll adjust some small things tomorrow (or rather when I'm awake again in a couple of hours). EDIT: Yeah, I did edit it now. Just a quick heads up. Although I am still not entirely satisfied with it… I might rewrite this one someday but for now I gotta move on to the next prompt.

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13th Dec. - Freaky Friday

"Love is in the air!" The amor chanted before popping off. At that point you didn't know yet that naked bastard meant it quite literally.

Next moment you open your eyes, you're stuck on an airliner with a screaming Dean next to you, in pilot uniform.

“I’m gonna kill that crotch-faced angel!” Dean yells, his face beyond pissed.

“Jesus- What the hell just happened!?” You sputter, blinking at him rapidly. You find yourself clinging to the armrests as your body tries to catch up with the sudden shift of surrounding. One moment you’d been standing in a dining kitchen, next thing you know you’ve been hurled into a cockpit’s seat 30’000 miles in the sky.

“Goddamn sky nudist, that’s what happened,” Dean growls, hands instinctively patting down his new clothings in search of his colt. He grits his teeth with an exaggerated roll of his eyes, “Of course he stripped me of my stuff.” His eyes roam the cockpit, the realization slowly settling in and his stomach twisting into sickening knots, “This gotta be some kinda sick joke.”

“What joke?” A voice startles both of you, Dean even briefly clasps his chest with his hand. You both snap your heads around to face a young, scraggly guy who looks like he’s one sneeze away from lifting off.

“Who invited you to the party?” Dean asks sarcastically, eyebrow arched and eyeing the poor lad with scepticism.

“I- uhm – I’m part of the cabin crew… I’m Bob.” He sputters, his fingers fiddling with his name tag before his eyes dart back and forth between you, curiously. “What party?”

“He’s being sarcastic, Bob.” You crack an amused, lop sided smile.

“Great, we’ve got ourselves another birdbrain. Just without the angel-juice.” Dean quips, rubbing his face in annoyance. “You better buckle up, kid. This’ll be a bumpy ride if it's real.”

“Maybe… it’s just a dream?” You try to reason, although you are pretty positive that this is anything but a dream, “I mean, he’s an angel after all. He wouldn’t put you in charge of 200 passengers, right?“

“660,“ Bob chimes in matter-of-factly, „It’s 660 passengers. Plus 16 cabin crew and that’s-”

“Bob. Not helping.“ You cringe inwardly.

“Including me…” he adds in a small voice.

“And who gave you permission to add your crap?” Dean deadpans at Bob before his head snaps back at you, “And you kiddin’ me? When did angels start to care about any of us?“

“Right - fair enough. Then, uh, let‘s just get the co-pilot. Bob, where‘s the man of the moment?” You turn to glance at the steward again.

“Uh,” Bob mutters with a nervous smile, “That would be you, miss.”

“What?” You look down and notice just now, that indeed, you were wearing a pilot’s uniform. “Really? No stewardess? Well, uh, that’s… refreshing.”

“Fantastic. Just fantastic.” Dean mutters next to you.

„Tell you what — I‘m gonna call Cas,“ Dean fumbles for his phone, „He can shazam us out of this shitshow- Nah! Come on!“ he cuts himself short and throws his hand in the air, “That son of a bitch took my phone as well!“

“Dean - breath - you’re panicking-“ you try to calm him down but get cut short.

“I’m not panicking! I’m peachy as fuck!” he retorts, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “Just because I‘m a little worried about being stuck up in this flyin’ tin can of death doesn‘t mean I‘m freakin’ out.” Dean defends himself, his eyes narrowed, trying his best to act tough and offended. When in reality his grip on the armrest is close to a breaking point.

You reach out a hand to place it on his arm, when suddenly the plane shudders and Dean’s eyes go as wide as saucers, his grip on the armrest now enough to strangle the life out of a man.

Bob pipes up with recovered confidence, “It‘s just a little bit of turbulence, Captain. I fly this same route every day, it‘s perfectly normal.”

Dean’s head whips around to shoot Bob a deadpan glare, “Yeah, ‘cuz you’re totally unbiased, aren’t ya?” Bob blinks at him, seemingly not understanding a single word he said. “I’m not your Captain, kid.” He clarifies with an exasperated groan.

Bob looks like his face has been hit with a wet towel, “But… you’re wearing a pilot’s uniform.”

Dean shoots you a sarcastic smile. “Oh, bless his heart.”

You sigh, “Thanks for stating the obvious, Bob.”

There’s a beat of silence.

“So... you are pilots.” he concludes.

“Shut up, trolly-boy.” Dean snaps gruffly before he turns back to face the sky in front of them. He runs a frustrated hand down his face, unsure what to say with his usual bravado seemingly dissipated.

“I need a drink,” Dean mutters to himself after a moment of silence, the sweat beading on his forehead.

Bob takes this as his cue and proudly hands him a bottle of water.

“This better be gin.” He grumbles and uncaps the bottle, downing it in one go. He sets the empty bottle down on the ground, his eyes flicking across the dashboard of the cockpit. His hair gets ruffled by a frustrated hand of his, before Dean suddenly pushes himself off the seat, muttering. “I need some fresh air.”

“Sure, let’s just open a window - are you insane??” You shout after him, turning in your seat. Bob shoots you the look of a deer caught in headlights, his face drained of all blood as he watches him walk out on them. You roll your eyes before you get up to rush after Dean.

“Just keep the damn plane in the sky.” You clap him briefly on the shoulder, at which Bob stutters something along the line of ‘this not being part of his job description’. But you cut him short with a mocking smile and a brisk slap to the chest. “It’s your lucky day, pal. You just got promoted. Now just don’t screw the pooch ‘till we’re back.” And off you went, slamming the cockpit door shut behind you. Leaving poor Bob back with nothing less but 10,000 switches, dials and buttons. And an empty water bottle.

***

You hurry after Dean who just disappeared in the lavatory. “Dean, wait-” you get inside as well, already feeling a slight deja-vu of the cooped up situation in here, but choose not to comment on it now. “Look, I know this sucks but… I think I’ve got an idea how we can get out of this.”

Dean tries and fails to pace in the narrow cabin. He’s now running his hand through his hair in a frantic manner instead. “Oh yeah? Please, indulge me.” He says sarcastically, his breath slightly shaky.

“Dean, listen to me,” you pause, your fingers pinching the bridge of your nose, “God… I can’t believe I’m saying this but…” you take a deep breath, fighting the urge to curse out a certain naked love-angel, “The way I see it… Right now, the lives of 676 innocent people depend on your dick.”

“Uh-“ Dean stares at you for a moment, dumbfounded, “Are you trying to flirt with me? ‘Cuz that’s one hell of an odd pick up line.” His lips shift into a mischievous smirk, “It’s kinda hot though.”

“DEAN,” You groan in exasperation, “I’m being serious! Lives are at stake here!” You reach over to lock the door with a bit more force than needed. “Including my ass!” You add as you whip around to face him again.

Dean throws his hands up in mock surrender, “Okay, okay! I get it! Just sayin’, it’s a weird thing to say to your boyfriend!” He plops down on the toilet seat behind him, his expression one of mock-seriousness, his lips twitching, “So what’s my dick gotta do with the fate of this plane?”

You sigh and lean back against the door, your knees almost touching his in the narrow lavatory. “Love is in the air.” You state matter-of-factly before you continue, “That’s what the Amor said, remember? It’s a lesson, Dean - we gotta… ya know-” while you speak you make an obscene hand gesture to get your point across, “- do it.”

Dean’s eyebrows shoot up, nearly disappearing into his hairline, “Whoa, whoa, whoa - slow down there, Squeak. You can’t be serious, you really want us to-”

Before he could finish the sentence, the plane lurched suddenly, causing you both to grab for each other and almost knocking heads. Your eyes lock, realization dawning on you that time’s ticking. Fast.

“No time for explanations,” you blurt out, “You just gotta trust me on this.” You drop to your knees between his legs, your hands working the buckle of his belt. When suddenly Dean pipes up.

“I can’t.”

Your mind just came to a screeching halt at those two words. “What?” You sputter, looking up at him in disbelief.

“I can’t do it.” He repeats in a low voice, clearing his throat this time. And his eyes dart around the lavatory in an attempt to avoid your flabbergasted look.

Silence.

“We literally fucked in a public fitting room the other day and you want to tell me you can’t do this?” You stare at him wide-eyed. This entire situation seemed like a stupid joke to you. Dean’s dismissing a chance to bang you? Ridiculous.

Dean looks taken aback by your argument, his face scrunched up in an offended manner. “Hey! That wasn’t 30’000 miles in the air - s’not the same!-” His voice turns into a little screech when you cup his privates in the middle of his arguing, “Hey, hey- whoa- easy there!” He sputters, his voice a few octaves higher than usual. His fingers wrap around the edge of the toilet seat in a death grip, forcing himself to regain his composure in front of you.

His cheeks flush with a faint pink when his eyes finally meet yours again. “He’s-” he croaks out before he cuts himself short. He clears his throat and forces his voice to its usual confident, gruff tone, “He’s scared. Alright?” His jaw clenches and he looks away again, forcing a sarcastic smile when he scoffs, “Go on, laugh it up.”

Oh. Now it clicked in your head. You suddenly feel bad for snapping at him, but you still can’t help the hint of an amused smile tugging at the corner of your lips. He felt so embarrassed, it was almost endearing. “Well,” you smack your lips, your soft voice carrying a hint of teasing, “Guess I’ll just have to step up my game then.” You push yourself to your feet and before Dean gets to object, you disappear out the door with a quick wink at him. Dean stares at the door in confusion, his eyes occasionally darting down to his half-exposed boxers and its non-existent bulge. His jaw clenches and he curses a silent “Damnit”, already regretting that he told you.

A few minutes later, the door to the lavatory swings open again. And Dean’s breath hitches at the sight in front of him. “I thought you’d like this, Captain Winchester.” You drawl out his name in an extra sultry tone. Your finger playing at the neckline of your tight stewardess outfit. And his attention was effectively drawn to your subtly bobbing breasts whenever the plane shook. It had taken some smooth talking but you had managed to trade clothings with one of the stewardess’. Not without raising a few eyebrows though. But hey, lives are at stake here. And if the Winnichester needs some coaxing then you’ll damn well do so by wearing a super short blue skirt and a tight blouse with your pushed up boobs hanging out halfway. “Damn,” Dean swallows thickly, his voice cracking slightly, “You- uh- you look hot.” He starts to fidget around on the toilet lid, his eyes roaming you up and down with a sudden look of lust.

“So do you, Captain.” You hum, your teeth grazing your lips slowly. The pilot uniform fit him perfectly. Just how you had always imagined him. You secretly always hoped that the day would come where he’d need to wear one for a case, but of course that chance never came. Until now. And damn, the sight made your stomach tingle and the fabrics of your panties dampen.

But the moment is ruined by another strong turbulence, making the plane lurch again, this time stronger. You stumble forward and Dean panics, his hands braced against a wall each, “Oh come on! This can’t be normal!”

You take the chance and with one ‘wrong step’ you land on his thighs, both your knees straddling his hips. Taking the moment back by force. Dean startles for a moment, gasping for air as he’s torn between panicking from the planes sudden alarming noise, or feeling turned on by your bold action.

You shift on his lap, your wetted panties grinding against his covered crotch. Dean’s eyes briefly flutter closed, biting back a groan. Without another word, you lean in and capture his lips in a passionate kiss, which Dean quickly succumbs to. After a moment, you break the kiss again, leaving him breathless and still a bit befuddled.

“You listen to me,” you command in a sultry tone while you cup his cheeks with both hands, holding his gaze, “You will fuck me now as if our lives depend on it. Ya hear me, Dean Winchester? I know you can do it.” Because our lives do depend on it, you add mentally.

Dean swallows thickly, his mouth suddenly going dry. After a moment of silence, despite the unsettling increasing clattering of the cabins and the rattling of the floor beneath them, Dean nods. “Yeah, I hear ya.” He replies huskily.

You can see in his darkened eyes how his fear is slowly dissipating and making room for excitement and lust. His hands slide off the walls to move to your waist and he rolls his hips up against you to show the effect you’re having on him. And indeed, his erection is twitching against the fabrics, begging to be released now. He looks up at you with that cocky smirk of his, finally carrying his usual confidence again. “Ready to be air-boned?”

“Seriously now?” You snort with an amused chuckle, your eyes roaming his pilot uniform, “Come on, Captain,” you playfully swat his thigh and then lean in, your lips grazing his ear, “I’ve always dreamed of gettin’ laid by a pilot. Hard.”

At that Dean’s green eyes glint with eagerness and desire. He raises an eyebrow and chuckles, “That so?” Without a warning, he grabs you by the hips and he pushes off the toilet lid. With a tight grip on you, he whips you around and bends you over the small washbasin. You gasp when you suddenly find yourself shoved into the mirror, your hipbones pressed firmly against the edge.

He leans down next to your ear, whispering gravelly, “Hold on tight,” His fingers dig into your hips to angle them slightly up, making you arch your back. “’m gonna make this so much better than your dream, sweetheart.” You shudder from his touch, the heat already pooling between your legs. He runs his hands up your inner thighs until he reaches your skirt which he slowly nudges upwards until he’s got his eyes on your exposed ass. He bites his lips with a low groan. “Damn, you look so beautiful, baby.” His fingers hook under the hem of your panties pulling them down to your knees in one swift movement. You stifle a moan, your thighs already dripping wet. Dean pulls his boxers down and his hard erection twitches against your ass as he leans down again, his chest firmly pressed against your back as he traps you underneath him. “Gonna fuck you ‘till we touch down. That sound good for you?” He growls with a cheeky smirk, his hot breath tingling your skin.

A low whine escapes your lips, pleading with a “y-yes- please.” You’re begging for him to take you already, to pin you down and fuck you like an animal. Your throbbing clit was aching for relief by now. You pant against the mirror and you feel your mind going hazy. Your head drops forward when you feel his fingers brush against your slick folds with a low groan of his.

“Jesus, you’re killing me sweetheart…” he whispers against the nape of your neck. He hooks his two fingers into your cunt to pull you back with a quick tug. You moan loudly but quickly get muffled by his hand, his middle finger slipping past your lips for you to suck on. And you suck hard, drawing a moan out of him this time.

“You ready to be banged to the heavens?” he asks deeply, his fingers slipping out of you again to part your folds open.

You nod, eagerly, a low muffled moan leaving your jammed mouth. Dean hums satisfied with your response and next moment he pushes his thick cock inside you. Despite his size, you take him with ease by now. But not without a guttural moan and you buckling for a moment. Dean quickly slips one hand underneath to your stomach to hold you in position. He doesn’t hold back long, after a few slow in and outs, he thrusts into you like there’s no tomorrow. Seemingly unloading all the pent-up tension from before. The hand on your stomach dips a bit lower, his finger flicking over your swollen nub, determined to get you there along him. His other hand leaves your mouth to push down on your lower back, pinning you down beneath him while his teeth graze at the skin of your neck. He grunts and groans, slamming into you like an animal. You meanwhile whine and whimper, your legs shaking from the relentless thrusts of his cock getting driven inside you, the turbulences only adding to the sensation. He picks up his pace, deep and rough, just the way he knew you liked it.

It didn’t take long for you both to reach the edge. Equally panting and trembling. When you finally come undone with one last hard thrust, you almost scream his name and your walls clamp him, taking him over the edge with you. Dean collapses on top of you with a shuddering, exhausted groan, but quickly makes sure to not bury you beneath him by propping himself up on his elbows.

After a moment of catching his breath, he whispers softly, “Damn… that was… intense.” his forehead drops to your shoulder and he pants heavily against your back, his damp hair tickling your neck. “You doing good, sunshine?”

You finally manage to flutter your eyes open again and it takes you a second to realize where you are. “Oh my God, Dean.” You exclaim breathlessly. You tip your head back, nudging him with your back-head. Dean slowly raises his head, just enough to look over your head, expecting to see his reflection in the mirror. But instead is faced with a swaying kitchen pan.

“Jesus,” he mutters a bit shocked, “Don’t tell me-” “Yes!” you cut him short while wiggling free from underneath him, “It worked! Love is in the air, baby!”

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Masterlist of opened windows:

1st Dec. - Sunshine 2nd Dec. - Spell Book 3rd Dec. - Lights Out 4th Dec. - Tickle 5th Dec. - Dirty UNO 6th Dec. - (TBA) 7th Dec. - Candlelight 8th Dec. - Hex Play 9th Dec. - Whip Stroke 10th Dec. - Barbie World 11th Dec. - Temptation

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Tags:

@ariasong11 @deansjacket @literallylexa @lmpala1967 @foxyjwls007 @impala67rollingthroughtown

[angelflms]

Cobra Kai has a tone-deaf problem.

Now, I am a Black woman so all of my observations are through the lenses of that. You can critique my words all you want, but don't be disrespectful because I will be equally as disrespectful in the replies.

I have this phenomenon that I've noticed for a lot of shows I have watched that I call "The Leo Dooley effect," inspired by character from the Disney XD show Lab Rats, where the main character, a POC who set the tone for the whole story, is surrounded by a white ensemble cast that slowly but surely pushes that character aside to serve their purpose.

Cobra Kai does the same thing with Miguel Diaz, as he seems to be the sole reason why any of these things on the show are happening (for better or for worse) and gets one of the worst character driven storylines throughout the series post-coma (I rewrote his story on my blog. Go find it under the Miguel or Xolo hashtags) to further make the show The Robby Show (we'll get into the tone-deaf writing of his character this past season in a minute). He becomes a shell of a character, empty, boring, and in the sidelines all up until the final season, where the writers seem to remember *snaps fingers* oh shit, Miguel's one of our protagonists, and writes an okay story for him. Better than his s5 plot, but not as good as the stuff we got in s1, 2, and the last half of 3 and 4.

Now, s6 has him in his true prime (not in the way people claimed he was in the past seasons). He's got a clear mind, he's goals-oriented, you wouldn't even be able to tell that this kid was paralyzed from the waist down a year ago (in-universe time). However, he's out-performing everyone, was single-handedly saving his team, and it wasn't even enough for Johnny. It was very interesting to watch as People of Color, especially Black and Brown people, tend to have to go above and beyond to prove that we're the shit, but it'll never amount to anything if our white associates (minus Devon in this case - more on her later) aren't doing anything. But the second they do, everyone is getting praised. Miguel knocked his opponent out in forty seconds. FORTY SECONDS. But because the team wasn't doing good overall, he got no attention. I know that feeling all too well and it sucks.

As much as I thought Johnny's "Miguel is our anchor" line was powerful, it also didn't at the same time. The Magical Negro is such an annoying stereotype, as well as the Strong Black Woman/Man, and the Brown and Asian variations that come with it.

Miguel is the Brown equivalent of the Magical Negro, trying to tell the white Johnny what's right and wrong. Teaching him what's okay to say and what's not, despite Johnny being grown enough to probably understand shit on his own. He basically is teaching Johnny in a sense despite the fact that it should be the other way around. And I know that's a typical mentor/mentee thing trope but with how the show goes out of its way to show how self aware of modern problems it is, it's hella tone-deaf.

In terms of the Strong Black Man trope (or in this case Brown), Miguel isn't always strong. He breaks down and cries pretty often but it's viewed by the fandom as annoying, weak, and pathetic, as well as not manly which pisses me all the way off because every time he gets emotional, it's with valid reason. Losing his girlfriend (both times), finding out he's paralyzed, apologizing for running away, his mom possibly dying, not getting into Stanford (tho this would've had more of a punch if Stanford actually mattered but it doesn't whatever). Also, he's a 16/17 year old Brown kid in poverty who was embarrassingly bullied MULTIPLE TIMES. You're telling me you didn't cry as a kid? But when Robby cries every once in a while (which is also equally as valid because he was also a kid in poverty who was bullied), everyone holds his hand and says "it's okay."

"He's our anchor." It just sounds so off to me. Like has to be the one to help everyone else, when you have two Captains who can do the exact same thing. We as POCs have to be the ones to hold down the fort and keep things steady on our backs while white people can settle for mediocrity and not have to do to much because "hey, the POCs got us." It's just like that "if you're in danger, find a Black woman" thing. Because we're expected to be the ones to save y'all when y'all are in trouble. But when the roles reverse, we're expected to save ourselves because we're strong. Y'all don't like it when Miguel isn't emotionally or physically tough because y'all expect him to push through since he's the main character, but it also feels like he's expected to push through because he's a Brown boy in poverty so he's been through enough.

Tory's "we have to fight to get a spot in life" speech was well performed by Peyton List but it felt strange to see a white woman explain privilege to a Brown boy who has less privilege in comparison to her. I have always had a problem with that scene and I never won't have an issue with it.

Moving on to Kenny. Kenny is the only Black character of current time to be in the ensemble. Aisha was on the show but left ofc. Kenny, like Miguel was brutally picked on, primarily by white kids, especially by white rich boy Anthony LaRusso. In the fandom Anthony tends to be the more favored overall. Kenny is primarily favored on the Black side of the fandom (much like Miguel). Similar to Miguel, there was a moment in s6 part two that may have not been intentional but in my eyes, felt very racially targeted.

Hawk and Demetri were very skeptical towards Kenny because they assumed that he was working with Silver despite the fact that Kenny didn't even want to do the Sekai Tekai to begin with after he became publicly bullied again. During a round of tag-teamed fighting, the boys refused to let Kenny in, causing them to lose the round due to Robby not being prepared to be tagged in (he thought they were gonna tag Kenny). Kenny gets mad, rightfully so but the boys didn't back down on their theory (the only reason this theory was even a thing was because they say Kenny and Silver talking and assumed the worst). It took the team's "anchor" to give Robby a pep talk to lead and the others will follow (you know, something a Captain should already know) for Kenny to get the attention he deserves. And then Hawk and Demetri finally accept Kenny. All because the white guy said "hey, we should tag him in."

That sounds so off in so many ways.

It wasn't intentional, I know. But the fact that this was something that happened and the boys didn't even apologize to Kenny after for the assumptions they made only furthers my point on how tone deaf this show can get. Amanda, Miguel, and Robby are literally the only people who see Kenny as more than just a Silver puppet and it sucks because Hawk and Demetri were in the same spot as Kenny once upon a time.

And then there's Devon, the overworking, overwhelmed Asian girlie who tries her hardest to seek validation and gets overlooked. Similar to Miguel in this new part, Devon got ignored badly in the first part. It was so bad that she cheated to get into the Sekai Tekai and got her ass handed to her. And like Miguel, it takes her to have to explain to her white sensei that she's being ignored for him for her to be taken seriously. She's not the best fighter by any means but I thought we were done with this Asian stereotype years ago. And the way Sam talked to her after literally celebrating her victory with all smiles and everything in the first part??? Like it felt so fake as hell.

Finally, Robby. Robby is written well, we all know that. But this shit that they did to him in the second part pissed me off, especially since it's not gonna get addressed apparently. So Robby gets drunk at a bar and basically follows Zara back to her hotel room. Next time we see them, he's disoriented, and she's kissing him. I'm sorry, but that's sexual assault, yes? Robby was drunk and didn't remember anything. So that's her taking advantage of him, yes? Well the creator apparently doesn't think so and is saying that Robby made a mistake and that the interaction won't be talked about next part.

Bitch, Robby is a VICTIM.

Zara sexually assaulted him. Just because he's a man doesn't change the fact that the man got taken advantage of by Zara.

Like did we watch the same scene?

This show has so many problems and I feel like since it's a show about fighting no one cares. But as a Black woman, I see this shit and in between the lines, there's so many issues that won't even get fixed because the show is over.

[lowkeyrobin]

can you do a gally x reader where its like a lovers to enemies to lovers??? thanksss 🫶

thank you for requesting!! I hope you enjoyed bc this genuinley rotted my brain bc I spent way too much time overthinking it 💀💀 ; HOLY SHIT POST WRITING ROBIN HERE.... uh I didn't see the first lovers bit I am so sorry 💀 I actually apologize bc idk how to fix it now LMFAO ; also ending is rlly dumb but jsjskdndns ; send tmr requests please 🙏🙏🙏

GALLY ; i don't want to be your enemy anymore

summary ; a little enemies to lovers trope with Gally because why not

warnings ; language, guns, knives, WCKD stuff

word count ; 1.6k

masterlist

Being stuck in that peaceful, dystopian Hell with Gally for three years was enough to make you rethink every single life choice that could've probably led you there, which wasn't much considering most of your memory had been erased. But, after escaping the maze, WCKD, fighting against Mother Nature in the Scorch and the Cranks, making it to the Right Arm, raiding a WCKD train, and a no-plan-plan to storm the Last City, you never thought you'd see Gally again, for better or for worse.

You two had never gotten along whatsoever, prior to, or post Thomas entering the Glade.

Gally would always do anything and everything just to piss you off. From the frequent physical fights to dehumanizing and undermining you for whatever reason, it never stopped. You were truly enemies, always out to get each other back or glare at each other from across the entire Glade.

He thought it was dumb for you to be awarded the graciousness of being a Runner, for whatever reason. Builders didn't have a lot going up in the membrane and he just proved it, constantly. But, sometimes you'd do the same, you weren't any better than him, just short-tempered, you supposed.

All those wasted nights sleeping in the Slammer over fighting, all the alcohol wasted due to throwing it all over each other. You both had a fire burning in your hearts to just kill each other, but in a way, it was fun. It was fun to piss each other off and get a reaction, and to just yell and scream your emotions out at each other. Toxic enemies, perhaps.

Minho though, good Lord. He always had to tease you, his fellow peer, about it.

"Oh, you're so in love with Gally" and "You look at each other with hearts in your eyes." You couldn't go a day without him bringing it up at least twice.

But now, you were trying to get Minho back from WCKD, and that's all that mattered. What did matter was that Gally was fucking alive.

Of fucking course, just your luck.

How he wasn't dead was beyond you, considering you watched Minho impale him with a spear.

You thought for a moment he was working for WCKD, considering he killed a small child last time you saw him, and he and his buddies basically kidnapped you and your friends. But, he took you guys back to some Rebellion setup hideout just outside the city, considering you couldn't get into the walls, now knowing there were microchips in your necks tracking your every move.

You stuck back while Thomas spoke to Lawrence, the guy in charge, turned half-Crank. You didn't want to be anywhere near Gally while he took Thomas down, so you stuck with the others, silently looking for reassurance in each other.

༘⋆₊ ⊹★🔭๋࣭ ⭑⋆｡˚༘⋆₊ ⊹★🔭๋࣭ ⭑⋆｡˚༘⋆₊ ⊹★🔭๋࣭ ⭑⋆｡˚

The sun sets rather quickly, and you, Newt, and Thomas join Gally into sneaking into the city through a train tunnel. That in itself was its own thing. You don't even know why you agreed to come with them, considering you were being led by Gally, but, alright then.

He takes you three on a little tour of the city, showing you all the bright lights and the building that towered over the rest, WCKD's headquarters.

You're perched on a balcony, looking over at the building from afar. A telescope rests on the ledge of the wall, Thomas looking through it. Gally stands on his left, and then Newt and you on the right.

Newt looks over at you, sensing your discomfort from a mile away. "You okay?"

You nod, arms crossed as you look out into the city.

Thomas looks up and over at you two, telling you to look through the telescope to look into the windows of the building. Apparently, he'd seen something of interest. The blonde steps forward, looking through the lens as Thomas stands next to him.

Gally looks to you, a weird kind of look in his eyes. You shrug, silently asking what he wanted. He mouths a little message that he'll talk later, probably wanting to get back before doing so.

After returning, you find your way onto the rooftop, needing some alone time. You'd forgotten about Gally looking at you entirely, needing to clear your head over seeing him again and being shot at as per usual earlier. The fact WCKD was able to track you was what had you slightly scared. I mean, what if they were able to see you right now, trying to take a breath all alone on the rooftop?

You don't hear Gally sneaking up on you, but when the footsteps become closer and closer, you quickly turn your head back to see him a few feet away. He apologizes for running up on you, seeing the way you quickly turned around in defense mode like you were scared or something.

"I just came out here to talk, about earlier" He explains, sitting down next to you, although making sure to leave some room between the two of you.

"What's to talk about?" You ask, looking up over the walls of the city in front of you.

"I dunno, to apologize, and try to make amends, I guess" He answers with a little snark, "I'm not asking for forgiveness, but if we're gonna work together, I'm not acting like your enemy anymore, okay?"

You take a second to actually look at him, noticing his freshly buzzed hair and his desperately needed growth spurt, mentally and physically. You slowly nod and turn away, looking back up at the walls ahead.

He exhales through his nose, a little frustrated. He wanted an actual truce, knowing you. "Y/n, I'm serious. I'm not bullshitting, I don't wanna be that stupid kid a year ago that had fun fighting and making fun of you, I want to work on the same team. I don't wanna be best friends, but I don't wanna be your enemy either"

You bite the inside of your cheek, trying to conjure up a response.

"Yeah, fine"

"...Cool"

"Initiate phase four"

You and Gally await as Newt rounds up all the kids, keeping a close eye on Thomas forcing Teresa to give them intel and directions. Thankfully, she was halfway on your side.

Newt and Thomas send you two off with the children, all under the age of thirteen or so, directing them down to the bottom level of the parking garage where Brenda awaits. You're dressed in the slightly uncomfortable WCKD guard suits, you in the red variation like Newt, Gally in the grey like Thomas.

Once they were safe on the bus with Brenda, the two of you quickly scurried away to get lost in the crowds and hopefully meet back up with Newt and Thomas soon. You make sure your gun has the safety on while in your belt, deciding to work with handguns tonight, while he decides to go for the more bulky, electrical type of gun this night.

Somehow, Gally with a gun was kind of hot, but you'd never admit it aloud.

You power walk down the streets, making and pushing your ways through the crowds, fake patrolling the bottom layer of the WCKD tower, awaiting a message from Thomas. He tries to strike up some small talk as you also await Lawrence to bring the corporation down, since the Rebellion would never be stopped by just a few seventeen and eighteen year olds plus their forty year old father figure friend. Another plus, to properly destroy WCKD wasn't a bad idea, so the idea commenced with a very certain plan.

"Y'know, I didn't expect to see you again, like, if I ever saw you guys again. Not in a rude "I thought you would've died" way, but I didn't take you as one to try and take down the government and shit. You're a tough shank though, I'll give you that, " He speaks, speaking calmly, trying to give you that reassurance once more that he genuinely wasn't trying to start anything.

You nod, "Never thought I'd see you again either, but it's kind of relieving, to be honest. You changed in a good way. A really good way." You lightly smile, giving him a little shoulder nudge. "And don't worry about the past, it doesn't matter anymore, I couldn't care. Just... got a little scary seeing you again I guess" You shrug.

He nods. "Yeah, it's fine. Uhm... fuck, sorry" He says, trying to find the right words, "I'm not saying this like, to try and weird you out or distract you but I feel like to not hate each other anymore, we need to be open-"

"I like you too, if that's what you're getting at." You shrug, stopping in your tracks as he does. "If not, then sorry, kinda jumped to conclusions." You awkwardly chuckle, double checking your safety again.

He nods, "Cool. We'll talk about this later then?"

"Why not now? Under the soon to be burning building?" You joke with a light laugh.

"I missed that laugh" He mumbles

"Hey, hey, calm down now" You chuckle, shoving his shoulder, "We have a mission, here. We're children at war, Gally"

"The mission can wait a moment" He suggests, giving you a look, awaiting approval.

You dramatically roll your eyes with a smile, accepting his move before quickly pulling him in for a little kiss. You dragged him by the strap of his WCKD vest, almost making him fall on his knees for you.

"Now come on, we gotta go find some people to get in formation with and get to Newt and Thomas" You nod sideways, pulling your mask back up.

"Yeah, yeah, let's go"

[nyarumie]

Brains to Brawn. (Chapter 2)

narumi gen x f!reader — 2.9k words, co-workers to lovers, narumi loves kisses, multiple parts, semi canon compliant, in denial reader.

STATUS: Ongoing. Chapter links: 1, 2, 3

Author's Note at the end! Likes, Reblogs, and Comments are also appreciated; Happy reading ♡

Cross-posted on ao3.

Requests, prompts, or any messages are appreciated! Just open my ask box.

"Y'know, I'd almost like to take you in as my officer right now. But numbers are just numbers. Get what I mean?" 

"...What?" you felt like your head was going to crack into pieces any time soon, and the Captain isn't even here yet! What was he even doing here? How can he say that without even sparing a glance at you? He's talking as if you're a new breed of officer! Even more, how does he not recognize your voice?!

Finally gaining some composure to speak, you sat up and started, "With all due respect, I'm an operations manager. I have no interest in becoming an officer, and I value my job beyond my own life. Besides, I doubt the Captain would approve such a shift in the workforce—" 

"That's not for you to decide. Kurusu, pull up the numbers again." you froze in place, eyes wide again. You felt your mouth go dry as the current First Division Captain himself, Isao Shinomiya, arrived swiftly.

A snort came from the doorway, taking your attention. Platoon Leader Narumi lazily made his way over one of the stools, crossing his legs, still engrossed in his mobile game.

It's not like you can do anything else in this situation, and you can't even hear Kurusu and the Captain's conversation. Ultimately deciding to just observe the Platoon Leader, thoughts started flooding your brain. 

'That bastard! He didn't even bother hiding his snort! Does he even have the authority to be here? Was he just loitering around? I'm sure this is just plain entertainment to him, but he's not even paying attention to anything except for his boring ass game! I wouldn't be in this situation if it weren't for him… and my co-workers!'

A voice shook you out of your thoughts. "With how hard you're gripping that gun and glaring daggers at me, I would've thought you wanted to kill me." Narumi said, surprisingly sounding nonchalant.

Oh, the menace. Is he now bored with his game, deciding to pick on me instead?

"I don't even know how to use these. And again, I'm an operations manager! Yours, specifically!" you insisted, now pissed at how he's decided to finally give attention to anything other than his game. You held your tongue back from arguing further, not wanting to ruin your image in front of the Captain. Oh, you sure would love to get a long, quality sleep once this is over. 

Narumi finally turned to look at you from where he's lounging, quirking an eyebrow. "So you're the voice that keeps nagging at me during our neutralization operations?"

"Why, excuse me! I saved your impulsive ass several times with my 'nagging'! Shouldn't I get a thank you instead? You should be grateful for finally meeting the angel whispering in your damn ears!" you feel yourself getting even more impatient and uneasy, snapping at him unintentionally. The stress must be getting into you.

You almost forgot about Kurusu and the Captain in the midst of your small rage, hearing footsteps approaching the protective glass. "Captain Shinomiya would like to make a deal with you." It was Kurusu who spoke this time.

A deal…? 

Isao Shinomiya focused on you with a steady, serious gaze. "Join the Defense Force Neutralization Unit. A proposal will be sent to you later within the day, taking into consideration your position in the Operations Unit. I am expecting an answer in 3 days' time." 

He made a motion to leave the room, "Our nation needs both your intelligence and strength. Show us results, and the deal will go through." he departed shortly after.

Unbelievable. He left before you can even comprehend what he said! But he's a busy man, alright… 

You stood up and detached the sensors attached to your body, making your way back to Kurusu. Damn, your legs feel like jelly. With slow, weak strides, you finally reached Kurusu in the monitoring area. 

"Oi." 

You jumped, forgetting about the presence of another person. Still feeling a bit overwhelmed, you raise your eyebrow at him, silently asking what it is that he wants now. Not that he can see you, though; he's still into his game.

"Show great results and I'll have you transferred to my Platoon."

"... Don't be stupid. I already said I'm not an Officer." Besides, you know very well how he does things in battle. Each Platoon Leader gets assigned their very own Operations Manager, and you just so happened to be assigned to him. He prefers going solo all the way, as if he's a Kaiju killing machine (he, in fact, is one). You'll just end up being one of the rookie officers standing around awkwardly while he gets things done.

"What's stupid," He stood up, stretching while still holding his phone in one hand. "Is doing nothing with those numbers. And refusing to be a part of my elite platoon. And I'm not stupid! I was an academic achiever, just so you know!" pointing an offended finger at you.

…And he just walked off. At least he acknowledged your potential power, and that's extremely rare. But only because of your potential aptitude for Kaiju no. 3. Which you don't have any plans of doing something about it. Yet.

"If it were any other superior, you would've been really fired on the spot. Didn't know you have quite the guts to call a Platoon Leader stupid." said Kurusu.

You mumbled a half-hearted apology to Kurusu, "Not like it matters to him anyway…" you said. You've argued with Narumi over comms during battle despite not knowing you. Surely, something as small as calling him stupid is nothing.

"You should go back to your station. Not a word of this to the other operators, the information should come from HQ themselves—unless you accept the to-be-finalized proposal." he said.

"So… my afternoon shift—" 

He instantly gave you a deadpanned look. Alright, no skipping work today. Which is quite fair enough, you unintentionally gave him another job to deal with, after all.

With a dampened mood and head occupied, you start walking back to your work station.

Your afternoon shift was surprisingly normal and peaceful. Concerned glances were thrown your way by your friends when you went back to work, the slightly uncharacteristic silence bothering them. Not that you were noisy per se, but you're working on one report to another rapidly. To them, you’re in distress; but to you, you couldn’t be more glad and at peace to just go back to your respectful, ordinary work, ready to reject the proposal from your Division Captain any time soon.

Unbeknownst to you, a certain Platoon Leader observed you in your ‘element’ through the horizontal glass pane from the door.

As Captain Shinomiya was drafting the proposal, an unannounced but familiar presence entered his office.

“Old man. Tell me, do you plan on assigning another yapper to me for our battles if she accepts the proposal? If so, I don’t need a voice screaming their ass off in my ears. I don’t want to babysit a rookie either.”

The Captain mentally noted how subtly grumpy Narumi is. "Each deployed officer is to be strictly monitored in battle. That's how we analyze your skills and determine if your results are worthy of representing the First Division." 

"You didn't answer my question."

"Narumi. Results are to be expected from you, regardless of who you're working with, or what you're doing on the battlefield. Do you understand?"

"...Whatever you say." he uncharacteristically departed back to his office without arguing back.

Of course. It never fully mattered to him who he worked with. He simply does what needs to be done and exceeds expectations "effortlessly". But that doesn't mean he never noticed.

All the previous operations managers assigned to him filed an official request to be transferred to another officer. He expected you to file a transfer request after the first few missions of being assigned to him, but you ultimately decided to stick with him to give his ears some beating through comms if you can't beat his ass in person. Sure, he found your nagging quite annoying, even telling you to shut up several times—in which you only screamed back at him, insisting you're just doing your job to keep him alive; but he'd be lying if he said he didn't find your reports beneficial.

Most post-battle reports written about him are more of a complaint than a feedback. The managers assigned to him would always give him a C to D grade for his performance, despite taking down the most destructive Kaiju on field. 'What's there to complain about when all Kaiju were neutralized?' he thinks. He stopped reading those, crumpling the papers and throwing them somewhere in his room. Besides, they didn't even bother giving any training routines on the suggestion box of the report, concluding that "he can deal with it by himself".

— A few months ago —

He thought his unleashed combat power would hit the wall at 71%. For a few months, no amount of training he came up with amplified his power. It was getting pretty frustrating, and even Hasegawa took note of how even more desperate and tired Narumi has been getting in the battlefield as Kaiju with higher fortitudes and unique traits keep emerging.

"You're not reading your reports." Hasegawa pointed out to him after an intense battle.

Narumi was sitting amidst the chaos, idly playing his portable console.

"So?" Yeah, it's not like he needed them anyway.

Hasegawa sighed. "The new operations manager assigned to you is as stubborn as you are. It's been 3 weeks, and she's pestering me to continue delivering reports to you. She knows you haven't been reading them. She refused to pester you herself, saying you might've had enough with her constant nagging during battles."

"Yeah, you're right. It's been too long, when is she filing a transfer request? My ears are about to blast with how much she's talking." Lie . He knows that he'll feel lonely if you file a request. He didn't even know you back then, but your presence in his earpiece is appreciated deep inside. He pretends to know everything about the battlefield thanks to Kaiju No. 1's retina, but it was because of your accurate and swift comms that he is able to plan steps ahead of the Kaiju.

"I take it you're not aware of your top performance rating in the entire Division for a whole month now?" Hasegawa guessed.

Huh?

Hold on. Not that it's supposed to surprise him—he knows he performs exceptionally well, despite what the old reports say about him. No matter how many Kaiju he kills, they all weren't reflected on his past ratings. He knows the results Captain Shinomiya wanted to see will never be reflected on any chart, so he didn't care that much. The ratings were just meant to motivate ordinary officers.

But the ratings were all subject to approval by the Analytics Department of each respective division. He doesn't know much, but each Operations Manager is to defend their reports about the officers they monitor. Which means… you defended him in front of all the scrutinizing gazes and judgmental minds of your peers. You fought for him, and only him. He's the only officer you handle due to his rank as Platoon Leader. He should be shrugging this off, but the thought of someone giving that much acknowledgement to him oddly feels comforting.

Narumi stands, dusting off his suit. "Will you be distributing them this week?" he hesitantly asked.

Hasegawa, sensing a change of mind in him, replied. "Of course. Let me know if you have any specific past reports you'd like to receive." Somehow, he always knows what's weighing in Narumi's head.

"All of them. The ones from her."

Maybe he was also just another ordinary officer, after all.

— Present day —

When he first started reading your reports, they were oddly short; but rather straight to the point. You analyzed his fighting style in accurate detail, as well as small habits he himself didn't realize during the heat of the battle. All the flaws and mishaps he made were not once accompanied by a complaint. No mentions of your arguments over comms were found either. Well, you did say communication and teamwork has a big room for improvement , followed by saying that it isn't a priority as he accomplished the mission in a heartbeat. You tried not to show it in your paper, but you're mostly concerned for his safety. 'So much for a person you haven't even met.' he thought. He wasn't a fan of reading these stuff, but yours is bearable.

What surprised him the most is the training routine you suggested. He can't believe you included his gaming sessions in the routine. They weren't required to follow the routine, they were only suggestions after all. But he can't help but follow them sometimes after seeing your little note at the end of the routine: "Goal: Assist Platoon Leader Narumi with his training to reach Captain rank."

Surprisingly enough, his unleashed combat power started rising in numbers again after occassionally following your suggested routine. As a Platoon Leader, he's now reached an 87%. No one's gonna give him these reports if you decide to be a Defense Force Officer. That's why he insisted on making you a member of his Platoon,  just in case.

Night time came and you retreated back to your room. The proposal never came whilst you were working, despite the Captain promising to deliver it within the day. 'Maybe he needed to revise it.' you thought.

You picked up a book as part of your nightly routine, reading different novels and papers to calm your mind to get some quality sleep. Just as you were about to get comfy in your bed, a soft knock was heard on your door.

You internally groaned as you opened the door, revealing Kurusu. It wasn't office hours, so you dropped your usual formality with him. "No. I don't want that. Good Night." you spoke before he can even wave the proposal right at your face, acting like you were gonna close the door on him.

"Wait! I promise you'll love this proposal." he said.

"And why do you say that?" 

He rubbed a hand on his nape, "... Salary adjustments?"

Now it was your turn to give him a deadpanned look.

Sighing, he said, "Look, just take the paper and give it a once-over, okay? Or maybe thrice. You were given three days to mull it over, anyway. It might not look like much, especially with the risk to your life on the battlefield, but, uhm… your interests are highly taken into consideration." He pushed the papers toward you, forcing you to hold it. "I'll be making my way now, then."

Motioning to close the door, you almost had a heart attack when you saw his arm suddenly slip right through the little space left between the door and frame.

His head poked inside your room again, "Ahem. I don't want to influence your decision or anything, but I'm speaking as both your boss and your friend. This very proposal changes everything you have right now, but it doesn't mean it's a bad thing. I think it will suit you just fine. You're above the average intelligent person, and you have a certain good kind of stubbornness in you that you have yet to realize." and with that, he waved you goodbye.

'What does stubbornness have to do with this? And I'm NOT stubborn at all!' you thought.

Instead of reading your beloved novel, you're sitting straight on your bed with the proposal right in your hands. 

As you read through it, you were able to gather these main points: 

It goes without saying, but apply as a Defense Force Officer and wield the Number 3 weapons.

Your rights and parts of your job as an Operations Manager will remain, such as writing reports and analysis of neutralization operations and Kaiju observations, regardless of whether you pass as an Officer or not.

"Great results" will give you three times the joint salary of an Operations Manager and an Officer, which may vary according to current position.

'Who the hell writes a proposal encompassing several pieces of paper, but has such a few main points?!' You were more pissed at how it was plainly written than the actual offer handed over to you. What's more is the fact that the section discussing financial terms was much longer than the risks involved! Did they really think you, a highly intelligent person, were that simple-minded? Money can't save your life in a battle!

"How much would the salary be if that was the case though…?" you mumbled to yourself. You pulled out your phone and did some calculations. If you were able to reach Platoon Leader in a short period, your salary would be…

"Half a billion?! That's impossible! Is the Defense Force even that rich to begin with?" You remember the mountains of packages delivered on a weekly basis, all addressed to Narumi. "Maybe it's possible after all…?"

After spending another hour thinking, you sighed, taking out your phone to draft your response.

To : First Division Captain Shinomiya Isao, First Division Operations Leader Kurusu Akira

Subject : Defense Force Application Proposal

As an honored member of the First Division and as a dedicated Operations Manager, I wholeheartedly accept the terms and conditions stated in the proposal.

Author's Note(s):

My head felt like I was floating and I barely had any sleep while writing this so I hope I didn't mess it up! I kinda got carried away and it became long.

i'm honestly just going with the flow and writing whatever feels right. I'm surprisingly having fun writing! But I wasn't sure of how I'd transition to Narumi's flashback, apologies for that part lol

Feedbacks are appreciated <3

[qqueenofhades]

Hey! I just found your blog and followed yesterday. Came for the fact that you're the only other person in this webbed site actually say out loud that they liked Biden, stayed for the hope and determination and perspective. Anyway just wanted to introduce myself and I hope you're coping well!

Hello and welcome to you and the other sudden flood of followers that I got after yesterday's event. I'm glad to have you and hope you are all in on the project of Kicking Fascism In The Shriveled Testicles 2024, American Edition. It's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it.

Biden was not my first choice (far from it) in the 2020 primary process, but when it became clear that he was going to win the nomination, I supported him early and often. Trust me, this was not a popular position, and it remains so, but so be it. By any reasonable metric, he is the most progressive president we have ever had, it is a crying shame that the media is so beholden to the Trump Teat of Drama that they gave him such a kid-gloved free pass and ratfucked Biden instead, and it makes me worry, a lot, for American democracy. I have always gotten a lot of "you support everything Biden has done so you're awful and going to hell!!!" messages, because this sure is a Webbed Site Where We Piss On the Poor, and like -- I don't. I had major disagreements with Biden, especially on foreign policy! But because I apparently did not performatively self-flagellate myself in every post about how awful he was but maybe I guess vote for him anyway, that got some people very mad! It's also true that there's literally nobody in the world anywhere, especially and including in Palestine, that would benefit from Trump becoming president again! Especially since Biden at the NATO summit recently and explicitly endorsed progress on the ceasefire framework he has been pushing for several months! So unfortunately, we live in a society where shitty choices are necessary, and that is part of being a grownup!

....anyway. Deep breaths. Rant for later. Glad you're here. I have been desperately trying to Not Politic for a bit, since doing so on social media in the year of our lord 2024 is a recipe for swift insanity, but the world keeps taking a large dump directly on those plans, and I guess someone's gotta do it. In more normal times (OH LORD WHEN), you can expect history (I am an academic by trade), random posts, various asks, and sometimes a great deal of fanfic for assorted blorbos, though the Horrors have done a number on that and I am also working on an original fantasy trilogy at the moment. (Still deciding whether I should bother trying to agent it or just publish it on Amazon/Lulu/etc.) I have turned off anon for the moment because otherwise my inbox would be a nightmare beyond comprehension, but I do generally enjoy talking about things and/or answering them as much as I can. I am old, queer, tired, fueled by coffee and spite, have been politically conscious since the first Bush Jr. term and have therefore seen all the Anti Voting nonsense before (quick thought: if it was going to deliver the perfect Leftist Messiah and/or stop a flawed candidate from becoming president, don't you think it would have done so by now?) So yes. Welcome again and I hope you will enjoy (if that is the right word for it) your stay.

[lookingfts]

The trolls are back - here's how to deal with them

The anon harassers are back in the fandom after a hiatus, and I know this is an especially sensitive time for a lot of people. So I just want to share a few things (that can apply to any fandom) about my experience and how I've dealt with them in the past.

First, and this is the single most important thing, the harassment is NOT about you or your story. It is 1000% entirely about them. There was a time when the stories that got attacked were about specific themes they didn't enjoy. Then it was just every story that was remotely popular. Now, who even knows, it's just everything. Do you know what that tells me? It's not about the writer, or the story. (They've attacked some of THE most talented writers in the fandom and some of THE best stories.) It's about their jealousy over someone else creating something that is loved by others. It's their jealousy over not knowing what their purpose is in life and not knowing what they have to give, so rather than figuring that out, they'll just attack people who have found their gift. So, fuck them for that.

Second! Please believe me that I understand if this impacts your mental health. It's straight up cyberbullying, and that sucks, especially when you're making yourself vulnerable by putting your heart into something and sharing it with the world. So I will not judge you if you need to take a step back. But I would argue that the better way to give them the finger is to ignore them and keep doing what you enjoy. They've already chased several authors out of the fandom, and it clearly hasn't satisfied them at all - they won't be happy until every last person stops writing, for some fucking reason.

Third, here's how I got rid of (the vast majority of) the harassment, as I was getting it pretty bad at one point. First, change your comments on AO3 to "Only registered users can comment." You might literally have to go back and do it for all your stories. It's a pain in the ass, and it cuts off users without an account from commenting, and I know that sucks. But I promise it will solve 90% of the problem.

For shitty comments from a registered account, just go ahead and block those people.

If they send you asks on Tumblr (I get those too), just keep blocking. Go to your inbox, click the three dots in the top right corner of the message, and hit Block sender. You can even do this with Anonymous asks, and it will block Anonymous messages from THAT sender without blocking Anonymous asks altogether (a feature I dearly wish AO3 would adopt).

You can also report comments on AO3 and Tumblr - I'm not much of an expert in this, but it's an option.

There were other steps I had to take, but I don't want to give the harassers any ideas (I know they read my posts). So if you have issues beyond this, feel free to reach out to me directly and I can share more, or help you figure out how to deal with it.

I hope this helps. Fic writing is a fun, beautiful creative expression with a wonderful community and I am sick of watching people be pushed out of it. It is not a reflection on your talent, and if anything, shows me that the harasser read and liked your fic and THAT is what pisses them off. If it was truly bad, they wouldn't care. I love all of you writers, and I believe in you, and I am here for you. Together, there are so many more of us than there are of them.

[ifuckingloveryoshu]

CANTO 6 PART 3 SPOILERS

Im beyond pissed, tumblr crashed in the middle of me doing this so this is going to be so much shorter than I want it to be. NON RYOSHU RELATED POST ABOUT THE HEATHCLIFF. DON'T TAKE WHAT I SAY AS FACT I AM NOT QUALIFIED FOR THIS. LOOK AT THE LINKS I CITE FOR MORE INFORMATION! You can click them when their mentioned. Im not citing in the proper format. This was done on 5 hours of sleep, two eggs, and a box of banana milk.

The Erlkonig or Erlking is this figure in German Mythology who kidnapps children. When he touches you, he kills you. This poem made by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe then adapted to this song is what you see. Erlkoning Heathcliff is trying to intice Heathcliff to die by telling him that it's his fault Cathy is dead. All identities refer to the sinner as "child" when you look into their uptie stories. Mili and the singer of the video here use the same technique of changing the tone and pitch of their voice to differntiate two characters.

The Wild Hunt is a part of Norse Mythology where Odin, mounted on his sixed legged horse Sleipnir, goes through the forest. According to norse-mythology.org, anyone who gets caught up in The Wild Hunt, spotted or seen, gets carried away. Your soul will get incorporated into The Wild Hunt. We all know Erlking Heathcliff did, the rising of the bodies. The Wild Hunt is also mostly describe as having hounds, and who was a hound? Hindleys.

From the same website, on the page of Sleipnir reads,

Also, the horse that heath rides on has a weird liney pattern on it's 4 legs that kind of look like that runestone. There's more connection here, I just don't want to type it again.

How did Project Moon mix two diffrent mythological ideas together? (Its not just two, they mixed so many more.) Meet human mistranslation and the progression of oral tradition and story telling throught time. I don't kno where to start. There was mistranslation poem when, according to ancient-origins.net Johann Gottfried Herder wrote a seperate ballad from the one I linked at the start called Erlkönigs Tochter.

The Anglo-Saxons were early German settlers. This is where things get messy because I have several more potential leaders of the Wild Hunt but here are two, King Herla and Herne The Hunter.

Herne The Hunter: Popularized by Shakespeare potentially from a play called The Merry Wives of Windsor. This man called Jacobb Grimm said that Hene The Hunter was related to Odin. Herne the hunter is this ghost. ( https://mythopedia.com/topics/herne-the-hunter ) Im trying to say there are other media that connect the Erlking to the Wild Hunt but its on Wikipedia so it makes it seem fishy. Another Link Here

King Herla: A british king who attended a dwarf wedding. When he left the wedding, the world had changed. Unbeknowst to him, 300 years had passed and he was claimed to be missing. When his men tried to get off their horses, they turned into dust so they were stuck like that. Read it here, its short. Someone better and more credible than me summed the story up better than I did, historian Chrissy Senecal. Read right here. An additional link to cross refrence if you'd like. King Herla and Odin got conflated together when really, their diffrent people

I found this other website article about Wild Hunts which kind of brings me to the next thing, the Harlequinn. They weild clubs, their devils, the image of them is popularly joyful? Maybe goofy and lighthearted? Perhaps associated with cards? Matt, or Heathcliff's portrayal of Matt. Now, I'm looking at Wikipedia and I see this section.

What do we have here? A mention of the Erlkönig, Dante's Inferno, masked, club weilding giant. Heathcliff's not giant but hes pretty tall, at least by my standards but whatever, im very short. DANTE'S INFERNO, Canto 11 and 12. What the fuck Project Moon, are you playing 5d chess?

Back on topic, Hellequin is the fairy king, and this figure pops up in German, French, Italian, and English folklore. I can't do proper research when all my search results are mixed with random junk and I'm becoming nutty. You will not normally be able to access this article without paying but here's the link anyways. Journal Article from this book on a section about horned deities made in 1922 speaks of a group of ghost riding, who are also huntsman.

And also another mention of Dante's Inferno. The name, Herne The Hunter is mentioned again.

All and all, The link between The Erlkonig and The Wild Hunt isn't as wild and unexplainable as I originally thought. It's just so cool to see all these concepts intersect. There still so much to touch upon like the headless horseman refrence and the Dullahans, RYOSHU COMPARING THE WILD HUNT TO THE PARADE OF 100 SPIRTS, something along that line, I forgot the name. I'm just not the right person to yell about this but I will anyways. The writers mixed so many symbols of death into one character. Such a wild and nutty Canto. Thank you so much Project Moon.

[pabit]

[corrupted footage]

OH WOW. THESE COOKIES REALLY ARE FUCKING AWESOME. WELL DONE, COWBOY!

Haha, thank you thank you. I’m hoping this can cheer you up a little…you’ve had quite an emotional day.

EMOTIONAL? I'M NOT EMOTIONAL.

Really…? Sorry sweetheart, but I’ve read back on your posts from earlier today and…it seems to me like you’re full of those stinkin’ feelings, actually! 

YEAH, NO FUCKING DUH. I SAID I'M NOT “E-MO-TION-ALLL”…YA DIG? I DON'T WAIL LIKE A WENCH AT EVERY LITTLE INCONVENIENCE. BUT THAT'S NOT TO SAY I HAVE ZERO CAPACITY FOR “FEELINGS” EITHER. IT'S TWO DIFFERENT THINGS. SO DONT PISS ME OFF.

Oh fine. Let’s get serious then.

What about other feelings? In your story about Vinny, you said you had felt something there but couldn’t figure out what.

(HABIT swallows the rest of the food in his mouth and pauses his vigorous feasting to stare down into the cookie plate)

…FUCK. WHAT'S YOUR ANGLE, PATRICK. I THOUGHT YOU WANTED ME TO CHEER UP…THIS TOPIC WON'T BE CONDUCIVE TO THAT END.

I am sincerely trying to help you, Habs, that's my angle. The fact is, I can cheer you up with small gestures that will certainly make you feel good for the moment, but you wont feel any better overall by refusing to talk about the shit that's dragging you down. 

…UGH. I GUESS YOU ARE RIGHT, BUT… VINNY IS DEAD – NONE OF THOSE FEELINGS FUCKING MATTER ANYMORE, PAT. THEY PROBABLY NEVER DID. WHAT MORE IS THERE TO TALK ABOUT?

Ah. That’s the part that haunts you isn’t it; the “probably” of it all. You’re uncertain, still confused about what happened here – what went wrong. And most importantly, you want to know why.

Am I correct?

……

Hm. 

………………….

Not going to answer me? Fine, fuck it. This is how I see it:

You became attached to this guy like ya never could with anyone else in the whole fuckin universe, Habit. And it felt so good to do so. You let yourself become lost in a fantasy; anticipating the thrill of having Vinny fumble over himself to keep you interested. Or how grateful he would be, to be the one entrusted with building you back up after every great fall; and you fall hard and often. You could crush him utterly and have him back in the next life. Vinny is much smarter and much stronger than he looks, and just as obsessive in his own ways…so he’d climb out of the rubble and do it all over again, just because he can; just because he wants to.

Oh yes…you and him would have grown so much stronger together, enough to take on the whole damn planet someday if you guys really tried. And you wanted that so badly. A monster-man and a man-made monster, gleefully kicking up the dust of all the world’s ashes, readying it for her new rulers: Vinny and the Habit, side by side, hand in hand, blood on blood.

It was a wonderfully childish ideal to believe in all that though, wasn't it? Even after all you’ve done for him, Vin betrayed you; taking all of those unspoken dreams and unfulfilled desires along with him as he dies to a fucking papercut.

So much time spent with him…now made completely pointless. So many pieces of your mind, heart, and body gifted to him, just to carelessly toss you to the curb when you weren’t looking…

It’s easier on a broken heart to deny that it’s broken in the first place. It's easier to fall in line when the numbness takes hold, and mindlessly insist that none of it matters; never did, never will. There's no reason to cry over spilled milk as they say. It's no big deal. It’s all just part of the game. Vinny was meant to be nothing more than a pawn on your board anyways. But he was indeed more than just that to you, wasn’t he?

Vin softened you and left you exposed to a world that won’t ever accept what you'll become even after he is gone; and he won’t be coming back, not this time. You and him made sure of it by bringing those awful weapons to life on that chilly fall evening before the end of the world. Your last full day together; where everything else in the universe ceased to exist beyond the confines perpetuated by two desolate dreamers; a warm fire at his legs; the melody of ghosts crowding around, crying out towards the inky sky above; beautiful and tragic all the same. You must have seen that in him, too.

After the end of it all, you got out alive and he did not. You didn’t win the game nor Vinny’s companionship, but you survived…and just barely.

Vinny is dead. 

And when that harsh reality slaps you across the face, you know you will never be allowed to forget the price you’ve paid, with suffering and with fire, for the loyalty that Vin never actually intended to give you. Now you’re covered with those scars. Razor sharp claws have sunk themselves deeply into you and won't let go. However…to whom do these claw marks belong to? Vinny; for betraying your trust and destroying your dreams? Or yourself; for letting him do it so easily…?

Why did you go back to your old sinking vessel, Habit?

Were you really so tempted by the belief that not taking Evan’s corpse would otherwise be wasteful? A shame?

Were you inspired by the discolored splotches painting decaying flesh in dull greys and blues; admiring the texture of his flesh canvas, well-weathered by the rain and the hungry mouths of all the tiny critters that feast happily upon each wrinkle?

Did the overwhelming smell of iron from all that ghastly bloodspill soaking into the ground below, brought up in the wafts of wet earth and wild mountain grasses, bring a wistful tear to your eye? 

Was Evan really worth all of that to you…?

…

No.

You weren’t there for Evan at all, I think. He was more of an afterthought if anything. It was Vinny you wanted to see though. And I believe that’s why you made the impulsive decision to repossess his friend’s body; it was the only way to be there at Vin’s side and feel him next to you, just one last time.

Then you ran away to avoid the consequences.

...........................................................................

>>

[aqours]

ok i REAAAAAALLY need to make a dedicated sideblog for this shit now i realize bc this game is gonna fucking fully get me dragged into this discourse so i'm gonna make an active effort to stop putting these on main, but i can't see myself saying more beyond this in general but ANYWAAAAYS

so i recently made this post about the cognitive dissonance regarding this game and people using fucking CALL OF DUTY a game that is more or less a recruitment drive to make the US military look cool and try to get kids to join up and that GTA's wanted system is actually NOT rewarding you or something to try to play a dick measuring contest with coffin but this interaction really interested me and i wanna talk about it bc i just blocked them after they refused to answer the last question but this is a very specific kind of gaslighting tactic i'm very familiar with from my own days as an anti

i think p much all of us who are used to engaging with this discourse are used to like y'know, being called awful horrible disgusting things. this is not the first time some fucking weird random person came onto my content asking me if i was a kid didler or wanted to fuck my brother. ain't gonna be anywhere near the last time either folks, but i and Lord God knows that's not the case so i don't care what a rando on the internet says but here's the thing: you can't "win" this, but they want to win it. no matter what you say you are the absolute worst kind of dreg of society that should be shot behind a barn and no amount of anything would work. if i actually pulled a list of sourced all that would have happened was they would've doubled down on calling me an inc*s*ious p*d* that I would be willing to use articles probably written by "people like me." because YOU don't care about "winning" this argument, you just wanna get the facts out on your end. it's a catch-22 folks, nothing you say will get you out of it!

i started by calling them a karen, they immediately escalated the living FUCK out of it and tried to trap me in this catch-22 to keep feeling morally superior to me. me saying i don't have such desires and never will isn't enough because i like this game. nothing but me renouncing it will change it.

but here's the thing about antis- they fucking HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE it when you turn it on them. look at the difference. look at the difference between they were the one throwing the catch-22 at me vs. the other way around. what about you? you just came onto my post to harass me, so i'll say it back. how about you? are you just accusing me of these horrible things because you are projecting your thoughts on me? you told me to get a therapist: so maybe you're the one that needs help if so!

violent video games must encourage violence, riiiiight? and you support it because it's violent. Game of Thrones had in*e*t in it so everyone who likes it also is the same. and Demon Slayer, where the pfp is from is violent, so you support it. the main protag's little sister also gets a superpowered form where she gets physically older and a tits out kinda look. so clearly YOU want to see your sister in the same way, right?

and it went as expected. you can see the tone going from smug jerking off with a shit-eating grin to just annoyed while smelling their own farts like it's a rose. and the moment i started doing the same uh i got NO fucking answers and they stormed off. i waited half an hour for a response before blocking them

so why am i typing up this walltext? because i used to be an anti. i fucking guarantee you i would've called everyone who liked this game [insert horrible things] like 7-9 years ago. so let me tell you, you know what pisses off antis more than anything? more than ANYTHING? turning this catch-22 bullshit on them. this is the only way you can end this miserable conversation without blocking them.

it's all one-sided bullshit and the moment you turn it on an anti it IMMEDIATLY shuts it down. this fucker KNEW the answer and you know it. so i wanted to share that, if you ever struggle with this shit: well the best thing you can do is block them and to give a fuck about winning their imaginary argument, but this is the only way to make the headache end otherwise. just throw the catch-22 right back and that's the end. thanks for reading!

[idiotic-b-gilson]

The Prank Theory: Or, Why Toby won't make an explicit announcement that Kris' pronouns are they/them despite that obviously being canon.

Disclaimer: people who use they/them for Kris are NOT the butt of the joke here. Although calling it a prank might be a little misleading to begin with, you'll see why.

I know for a fact, judging from my dashboard, that I am not alone in being mad at people misgendering the humans of Undertale and Deltarune (although, I will admit I used to be part of the problem up until quite recently). And we all wish for Toby to just go out and publicly announce that Kris, Frisk, and Chara use they/them only, that Mad Mew Mew is canonically transfem, etc., just to stop all the misgendering. It would certainly be nice and very helpful for the LGBTQ community. However, after giving it some thought, I've come to the conclusion that it most likely cannot happen, and the reason why is the Prank Theory. Treat it as an explanation, but not an excuse.

I came up with Prank Theory over something that's completely unrelated to the above, funnily enough. You see, I have this headcanon that Asriel Dreemurr is not cisgender. I'm not entirely sure what his gender is, but he's not cis male for sure. And I've seen a variety of different takes on this concept. For example, AUs like (Ask) Fallen Royalty by @starlightshore present Asriel as having transitioned in a more feminine direction ((A)FR specifically describes her gender as feminine nonbinary). Others still write Asriel (chiefly the Deltarune one) as transgender male (I've mostly seen that take in NSFW fanfics on AO3, which is a shame cuz it has great potential beyond that. Please tell me where I can find more). Other others still, like my beloved mutual @sukifoof, have proposed that Asriel might be agender. And, let me be clear about something: those are all great ideas, and I love them. But I started to wonder, which of these ideas is the closest to canon? Like, if we also factor in authorial intent, which of these options would fit under it, and which ones wouldn't? That was when I came up with Prank Theory, as a way to kind of imagine at least one aspect of said authorial intent.

Spoiler alert, according to Prank Theory any kind of transfeminine Asriel is incompatible with canon, but again I want to make it clear that that doesn't mean I think they're "wrong" or "bad" or anything like that, and I want to reiterate my endorsement of writing Asriel this way. Besides, my theory could be completely wrong, so...

So, after all that stuff, what does the Prank Theory actually say? Well, in summary: Undertale and Deltarune are some of the most "woke" video games ever made, but conservatives and reactionaries don't seem to have realized that yet, funnily enough. Now, calling it a prank is a wee bit misleading, since it implies that tricking right-wingers into loving a video game with a very progressive setting and message was at least part of what Toby intended. And I don't believe that's the case. He simply makes video games he wants to make, and they just happen to reflect his views on the world, and these views just happen to fly over the heads of some people.

This in and of itself would probably not make it a huge problem for Toby to put in one of his newsletters, or even in an X (as in, former Twitter) post, a correction regarding the genders of his characters. However it does start to become a problem when you factor in that the UTDR community has hundreds of thousands of people in it (although as of the March 2024 it might be a rather liberal estimate), and many of them would be quite pissed off if the video game they like had "suddenly" "gone woke" (ignorant of the fact that both it, and its main creator have been openly "woke" the whole time). And that is a problem in the current environment, because it means that Toby, as well as other people on the UTDR dev team, would be at a significant risk of hate and harassment, which in the Year of Our Lord 2024 could lead to Angel knows what.

On a more cynical capitalist (and much more speculative) level, attracting political controversy this way could sour Toby's relationship with big video game companies which have (as far as I know) played an important part in why Toby's got basically unlimited resources to work on the game of his fever dreams. They saw the widespread, universal acclaim that UT, DR1 and DR2 received, and drew the conclusion that DR3-4 (and the future chapters) will also get a similar reception, and they will get great returns no matter how much money they pour into it. This belief could be shaken if Toby attracted the ire of his transphobic fans by correcting their misgendering of his characters, and thus limiting the reach Chapters 3 and 4 would otherwise have (but again, this is pure speculation, I'm not an economist, nor do I know how much companies like Nintendo have actually invested in Deltarune. So I could be, like, way off).

And that is, in the end, why I believe Toby Fox will not make a statement regarding the canon gender of any UTDR character, at least not while Deltarune is still in development. After it's finished I think he might feel free enough to take that step. But we'll have to see.

Now, I don't know if I'm right. I feel pretty confident in my own theory, but there's a good chance I missed something. So, if I did, please lemme know. In the meantime, let's hope Toby will disprove my theory soon and set things right. And I'll see you around.

[electrikworm]

Human Shield: Part 3

Crosshair waits for news on Wrecker's condition, hoping his brother's life was deemed worth saving.

Later, Wrecker wakes up, something he hadn't expected to ever do again.

Final part of my "how Wrecker got his scar" fic :)

--

Content warning: Talk about death and self-sacrifice

Excuse me for the delay, I am very good at getting distracted by other projects!

Hope you enjoy the last chapter of this fic :) It turned out longer than expected

Inspired by this post by @squad-724

Part 1 Part 2

Enjoy :)

Read on Ao3

It's been hours and still nothing. Crosshair kicks at a piece of scrap metal Tech must have dragged into their barracks, flinging it across the room.

Tech looks up from the workbench to glare at Crosshair. “Breaking things solves nothing.” He scolds, making Crosshair want to kick the damn thing again, just to piss his ori'vod off.

After their initial post mission nap, Tech started working on force knows what and hasn't moved since. Hunter's been laying down most of the time, only getting up to drink a cup of caff. Crosshair doesn't understand how they can bare to stay so still, feeling like he'll lose his mind if he doesn't move.

So Crosshair paces, not knowing what else to do. At some point, he pickes up Lula, cradling her against his chest. The soft pressure of the tooka doll in his arms is comforting and she smells like Wrecker. And besides, if Wrecker can't hold her where he is now, in surgery or a bacta tank, Crosshair might as well hold his beloved stuffed tooka for him.

Crosshair has to believe that that's where Wrecker is, in surgery or a bact tank, because the alternative is so much worse. If he isn't being treated, he'll have been decommissioned, body laying cold in one of the morgues, or already recycled and disposed of. The sniper doesn't even want to consider that option, wants to hope they'd never considering decommissioning someone as valuable as Wrecker.

But Crosshair knows how this place works. Clones have been discarded for less, it happens all the time. And as defective clones, they're all already on thin ice. If the med scanner really did miss something like organ failure or bleeding in the brain, then they might not bother trying to save Wrecker.

Crosshair sits down next to Tech, wanting to distract himself from his darkening thoughts. Wrecker's broken helmet is propped up on the table. Crosshair picks it up, twisting it to inspect the jagged edges. Wrecker's blood has dried to the inside.

“It is beyond saving.” Tech says. Crosshair hates how that statement might end up being said about their injured brother as well.

“I can karking see that.” Crosshair spits. “Why'd you take it anyway?”

“I'm not entirely sure. It felt wrong to leave it behind.”

Crosshair huffs, but he gets what Tech means. On missions, they almost exclusively see each other with their helmets on. In a way, their helmets have become almost synonymous to their faces. The now cracked helmet in Crosshair's hands is nearly as disturbing to see as the actual injuries marring Wrecker's body. Seeing him was still worse of course. Crosshair almost feels sick when he remembers the state Wrecker was in.

Suddenly he can't bare to look at the helmet any longer. Placing it down, he resumes his pacing.

Time keeps passing, and still no news. Crosshair starts trying to tidy Wreckers bunk at some point. Not all of it though. It wouldn't feel right to see Wrecker's bunk entirely neat. That would make it feel like he's gone, and Crosshair doesn't want to think about that.

“What's taking them so long?” Crosshair hisses. He can't stand all the waiting.

“I don't know Cross.” Hunter mumbles, sounding tired. He's not been taking the situation well, none of them have.

Crosshair doesn't know what he'd do if Wrecker dies. He should be prepared for this, they've been trained to accept their own and their brother's deaths since day one. But Crosshair can't get his head around the possibility of Wrecker not being there any more. The two of them are closest in age, the two youngest of Clone Force 99. Wrecker's only a few minutes older than Crosshair, a fact he's always used to piss the sniper off.

But annoying as he is, and as much as Crosshair acts like he hates it, Wrecker's always been there for him.

Anger rises in Crosshair's chest. He can't believe they're being left in the dark about this. He's just about to kick another piece of scrap across the room when the door to their barracks slides open. A member of medical staff Crosshair doesn't recognize stands in the doorway.

“Where is he?” Crosshair spits.

“CT-9903 is in a bacta tank.” The staff member says. Crosshair has to put a hand on a nearby wall, tension from the last few hours suddenly leaving his body. He can hear the shaky breath Hunter lets out from across the room. “I have also been instructed to remind you that you have yet to report anything about the mission you were on.”

“We'll get it done.” Hunter says. Crosshair hadn't even heard him approaching. He'd like to ask if they can see Wrecker, but knows the answer would be no, so he says nothing.

As the door closes again, Tech gives him a knowing look. They'll sneak out to see him later, during the night cycle. Crosshair sits down. He can wait a little longer now, reassured by the fact their brother is alive. They'll get to see him soon enough, even if it is only through a sheet of transparisteel and litres of bacta.

--

Wrecker always expected to die for his brothers sooner or later. It's a fact he made peace with early, even before they gave self-sacrifice a number on their list of plans. So naturally, he'd imagine what dying would feel like.

After hours of careful contemplation and turning the idea around in his head over and over, he came to a simple conclusion: It would hurt, and then there'd be nothing.

And Wrecker wasn't wrong. Death does hurt and is followed by nothing.

But then the pain started coming back. Sometimes less, sometimes more, but it always comes back. An the nothing starts getting replaced by memories, and dreams and, worst of all, nightmares. There's nothing to stop them now, no vode, no Lula, nothing. After all, you can't wake the dead.

Wrecker longs for the nothingness he expected, anything would be better than an eternity of nightmares and pain.

Images of his vode torment Wrecker, images of them injured and dying because he didn't execute plan 99 fast enough. That's when the light appears.

Impossibly bright, blinding, so intense it hurts. Wrecker tries to twist away from it, tries to cover his eyes. He doesn't know why. Wrecker knows he's dead, doesn't have limbs to cover the eyes that don't exist nor a body to turn away from the white light. He can't do a damn thing against what he's exposed to now.

Wrecker can't breath. Confusion and horror rise in his chest as he heaves for air. Why is he trying to breath in the first place? He's dead, shouldn't be breathing at all. But he can't get himself to stop. He just continues to wheeze and cough as he struggles to get anything into his non-existence lungs, as the blinding light refuses to dim and everything starts hurting so much worse.

He sits up, another thing he shouldn't be able to do, not in the void of bad dreams and pain he's in. Tears and spit run down his face as Wrecker claws at his chest. He just wants it all to stop, wants all the pain and uncomfortable sensations gone.

Wrecker just wants to rest.

Colour swirls in the white light surrounding him, and Wrecker almost thinks it's another dream. But they feel too close, too real, almost like he could touch them if he tried. He doesn't, however one of the splotches of colours does try, and something touches Wrecker's hand.

In an instant, Wrecker's vision focuses through the blurs of tears and pain, through the blinding light. He can't stop the sob that forces its way out of his throat as he recognizes those before him.

Crosshair, Hunter and Tech.

“No, no no no...” Wrecker mutters as he backs away from them. They shouldn't be here, they shouldn't be dead! His brothers say things, their faces twisted in emotions Wrecker can't read. All he can do is uselessly gasp for air. He failed them, failed to live up to his purpose. Wrecker let them die.

“'m sorry.” Wrecker forces out between clenched teeth and failed attempts to breath. He hopes they're not hurting like he is, he hopes the pain is his punishment alone. As hard as he tries, Wrecker can't get a coherent string of words out. He wants to tell his vode how sorry he is for letting them down, that he tried his hardest even if it wasn't enough, that he wishes they were alive. It all comes out barely audible over his continuos struggle for air he doesn't need.

When Tech grabs him by the shoulder, Wrecker almost wishes his brother would hit him. Anger at his failure would be understandable, Wrecker can deal with anger. It's all he deserves for letting his squad down when they needed him most.

Instead, Tech shakes him almost gently. “Would you stop apologizing and listen for a karking second?” Tech almost does sound angry, if it weren't for the way his voice nearly gives out. “We're not dead, and neither are you.”

Wrecker doesn't say another word. Not because he doesn't want to apologize further, because he really doesn't think he's brought across just how sorry he is. It's the fact that Wrecker can't get his brain to understand what Tech is trying to tell him that gets the large clone to shut his mouth.

“Calm down Wrecker!” Hunter orders, a clear urgency to his voice. Wrecker is suddenly very aware of how loud his frantic breathing is. This time, he does manage to silence it, the white room suddenly oppressively quiet.

“Don't hold your breath, di'kut! Breathe.” Crosshair takes Wrecker's hand and presses it to his chest. Wrecker can feel his little brother inhaling, tries to match his own intake of air to Crosshair's. This is something Wrecker can do, it's hardly the first time they've had to resort to something like this. It takes a while for Wrecker's lungs to stop burning, but as they do, and Wrecker's head starts to clear, Tech's words start making sense.

Crosshair is breathing, he feels warm to the touch, his heart is beating. He feels alive, is alive . Fresh tears stream down Wrecker's face. It hurts to move, but Wrecker doesn't care, desperately needing to hold one of his brothers immediately.

“Stop squirming about, mir'osik!” Crosshair hisses, putting a hand on Wrecker's chest. There's an astonishing lack of venom to his words. “They only just fished you out of a bacta tank.”

“Don't care.” Wrecker takes hold of Crosshair's arm and drags him into a hug. White hot pain flares along the entirety of Wrecker's right side, but it's still the best thing Wrecker's felt in what seems like an eternity. His brothers are alive, that's all that matters.

“You should care.” Tech says. “Your bones have barely fused and there are still more bandages on you then there is exposed skin. If I am entirely honest, you should not be sitting up in the first place.”

If Tech doesn't want Wrecker to sit up, he'll lay down. He pulls Crosshair onto the bed as he does so. Crosshair complains loudly, surprisingly enough not about Wrecker hugging him, but about the fact Wrecker shouldn't be putting more weight on his injuries. Once Wrecker moves to the side to let Crosshair lay beside him, the sniper stops making a fuss.

Wrecker can make out that they're in a medbay now. If the look wouldn't give it away, the sharp smell of antiseptic is telling enough. Wrecker's glad his brothers are with him, he doubts he could stand the cold room alone.

Metallic screeching makes Wrecker aware of Hunter and Tech pushing one of the other beds up to Wrecker's. They're definitively not supposed to be doing that, but Wrecker won't complain. Two beds side to side, Tech and Hunter climb up on the empty one. Wrecker slings his arm across both of them, ignoring the way his body aches at the movement.

“Careful.” Tech warns. “You sustained multiple fractures in that arm, as well as your legs. It would be highly inconvenient for you to disturb the breaks.” Wrecker nods weakly.

“You're blind and death on the right side.” Crosshair sounds sad, apologetic.

Wrecker gingerly touches his face, hand brushing against thick bandages. “I thought things looked and sounded kinda funny.” Wrecker says with a laugh, making his chest sting horribly. His vode don't laugh, much to Wrecker's disappointment.

“We brought you someone.” Crosshair pulls Lula out from where she'd already been squished between them. A wide smile spreads on Wrecker's face, tugging painfully at the injured side of his face.

“Lula!” Wrecker takes the tooka doll from his brother carefully. “You kept her!” He holds her to his face for a moment, relishing the feeling of the familiar soft material against his skin, before tucking her between himself and Crosshair again.

“Kept her? Why wouldn't we keep her?” Hunter's face pinches in confusion.

“You know...” Wrecker says, waiting for them to guess what he's saying. They don't, so he continues. “If I died...”

“You think we'd get rid of her if you died?” Crosshair sounds so genuinely angry, Wrecker almost flinches away from him.

“I hoped you wouldn't...” Wrecker says, playing with Lula's ear to avoid looking at his vode.

“Maybe you did take brain damage, if you think we'd just get rid of your stuff like you never existed.” Crosshair still sounds angry, but Wrecker spots tears threatening to spill across his cheeks. Wrecker pulls Crosshair closer. He didn't want to make his brother cry.

“I'm sorry it took us so long to get to you.” Hunter says. He looks pained. Wrecker's chest aches at the sight, and he tries to pull him into a hug as well.

“What do you mean?”

Hunter swallows thickly. “We, I, made the decision to leave you under the rubble in favour of the mission. You almost died.” Hunter shakes his head. “Maybe your eye and ear could have been saved if I hadn't made that decision.”

Wrecker runs and uncoordinated hand through Hunter's hair, messing it up. “Eh, forget about it. I wasn't planning to make it out of there alive. This is a good surprise either way, missing organs or not.”

“If you try something like that again, I'll kill you myself.” Tech says, glaring at Wrecker half-heartedly.

Wrecker laughs at his brother's words, hugging his vode just a little tighter, but doesn't say anything. He knows, and he's sure his brother's know too, that if it comes down to it, Wrecker won't hesitate to call plan 99 again. He's glad to be alive, to get a bit more time, but the fact still remains: Plan 99 is Wrecker's duty and one day, it will be the last thing he does.

[queendarlings]

The Sweet - Live at Musikladen 11/11/1974

and here it is - my long announced post about sweet's iconic live performance at musikladen. and boy, do i have a lot to say about it. so, be prepared. it ended up being a lot longer than i originally planned. help. i do apologise for the chaotic feeling this might radiate. this is just me trying to get the thoughts in my head into this post.

first of, general thoughts i have on this performance (except for incomprehensible inner screaming). that right there - that's a rock performance how it's supposed to be. raw voices, loud, energy and you can see how much brian, andy, mick and steve are actually behind what they're doing. and they're having FUN - especially mick on drums. (who can say of themselves to have a smile that lights up the whole stage like that.)

a big point that isn't really obvious on the first watch, but i believe it's very important cause it says a lot about sweet as a band. this concert happened in november '74 - probably the height of their success. and yet you do not find ONE of their commercially successful singles in this performance. none of the bubblegum "little willy" or "wig wam bam", not "blockbuster" or "ballroom blitz" or even "teenage rampage" (that came out the same year). no, instead you have some lesser known singles and some songs that never made it into a single and i think that's perfect. also, "no you don't" is one of my favourite songs in existence so thank the rock gods we got this incredible live version.

moving on to the next point - their individual talents. for whatever reasons, people like to sleep on the fact that they're not just incredibly good-looking, but also talented as fuck. brian's raw voice with a power you can barely imagine, steve's bass riffs and the way his voice always compliments brian's lead vocals, andy's solos and high harmonies and mick, drumming god on percussions and powerful harmonies that balance steve's and andy's higher voices out. i rather wanna save special words to the respective song, so i'm gonna do that there.

you can feel the "fuck you" attitude in the air, actually. not that i blame them, the studio didn't take them serious, but i think it just adds a certain spice to the entire performance. and i am all here for pissed off rock. and although they're pissed off as hell, you can still see them being the people they are beyond all the glam attitude they put on for tv. like, mick genuinely enjoys all of his time on drums and encouraging his brothers, brian's actually a real softie, steve just doesn't give a flying fuck and andy is like complete rock vibes.

ALSO, why again did they never make it into the rock n roll hall of fame? what else do you have to do aside from this?? sacrifice a family member??? give. them. the. appreciation. they. deserve. for fuck's sake.

now i'm gonna talk about the songs in detail (no particular order, just me dumping my thoughts onto you)

A) "Burn On The Flame"

okay, let's start with "burn on the flame". i love brian and his little mic aggressions. that man really said "boy, i hate them microphones." (jk, but i love the attitude). also hello, steve and mick syncing in with each other - we love a great coordinated rhythm section. and let me tell you, mick twirling around his drumsticks is gonna drive me insane in the long run. i love harmonies so much AND GOD DAMN, the combination andy-brian sounds so good - it's like an exquisite cake with layers that blend together perfectly. plus then we have the switch to the chorus and let me tell you, these harmonies blow me away. andy casually going really high while brian and stevie stay below. a godly experience for the ears. mick joining in every now and then as well. ALSO, THE INSTRUMENTAL - WHY DO I SEE SO MANY PEOPLE SAYING ANDY ISN'T A GOOD GUITARIST??? HE'S ROCKING IT??? also, god save me, mick tucker on drums. (beware, this is not the last time i will say this - we still have mwtga coming up). brian clapping is the most adorable thing ever and you cannot convince me otherwise. and the way mick just locks in on andy for the second solo / finale to keep everything in sync. 🙏🏻

B) "Breakdown"

okay, let's just say this performance already starts perfect - brian's thumbs-up is a 10/10, no further explanation needed. AND THEN THE WAY THIS SONG STARTS - ANDY AND MICK AND STEVE, I LOVE YOU. mick going nuts on the bass drums and andy with the guitar plus stevie with bass - ear-yummy combo. have i mentioned already what a phenomenal drummer michael thomas tucker is? and how absolutely gorgeous brian's voice is? he's got this unique sound in his voice and it's a pleasure to listen to him. i love the way steve is absolutely fixed on his bass tho. he does not care, he just wants to rock. which he does, because oh my god, his harmonies with brian. i have talked about it before in a different post, but these two guys - they have voices that blend together so perfectly you can barely tell them apart and that results in this unique sound you can hear in the chorus - although stevie's mic seems to be really faint :( andy giving his whole energy to playing and then he just straight up starts communicating with bats cause what in the damn is that falsetto??? i heard a rumor that he could sing higher than sopranos he knew (i cannot confirm this though) and boy, do i have no trouble believing that. i am a soprano and i need a fucking lot of preparation to hit notes like this. and he just casually goes "yup, gonna do this live". my deepest respect, andy. and of course, we love a strong drumming finale!! (andy's face is a meme there, lmao)

C) "Turn It Down"

we start with a little andy hairflip!!! also, brian vibing is absolutely my cup of tea and i love him and i would die for him. also - his rough vocalising???? sign me the fuck up for front row seats, please. yeah, i think you can feel their pissed attitude the most in this song and fuck yeah, does. it. work. (i am aware that the song on its own is pissed off already, but perfect attitude!!!) stevie doing solo vocals is always a killer and will always get full points from me. my god, angels in heaven, you really sent us brian thinking we wouldn't notice? his voice and his gestures when singing? i love everything about it. i also love whenever the camera cuts to steve there's literally just "bass". nothing else going on there. he is absolutely focused on that and i deeply respect that. also, the way he sings "listen here YA PUNK" just gets me, 10/10 attitude. and brian clapping along again, i love the vibes. andy going nuts when soloing is my personal highlight of this, total commitment to absolutely rocking. one thing i really love about "turn it down" is the fact it sounds so different from other live at musikladen songs because we don't have andy in the harmonies - just mick, steve and brian. so naturally the chorus sounds a little deeper (andy's high harmonies aren't present) and that gives us a whole new touch which i believe is awesome.

D) "Solid Gold Brass"

okay, this song has me with its intro alone. i just love the wailing sound that comes from andy's guitar, so melodramatic. then we have brian on synthesizers!!!!! and stevie standing next to brian in a few frames with that smile? can't help but grin. THEN ANDY JUST GETS OUT HIS FALSETTO AGAIN AND I AM AGAIN WONDERING HOW DOES HE NOT HAVE TEN TRAINED BATS WHO'D FLY AROUND ON STAGE AT HIS COMMAND??? no, but seriously, as someone who is also a professional roger meddows taylor stan, i enjoy a good falsetto and andy has some really really great ones (medussa, anyone????). in contrast, we immediately have our ginger bassman sing-speaking and him being british sneaking in the word 'bloody'. (i support your pissed off attitude at all times, steve.) and then we get these perfect steve-brian harmonies again and i am telling you, the way brian looks at steve - i melt. brian doing the second verse is such a cool switch in the general sound of the song, i love it. plus, he can show off his amazing voice and i can't get enough of that. okay and mick being a supportive brother in the background, smiling and yelling "YEAH" when brian nails these high notes??? i stan. brian's voice is still not completely back on track and you can't convince me mick wasn't ready to throw hands with everyone who snickered at that. one thing i always love is when steve just starts messing around with his solo lyrics live. he's got zero fucks to give and he will show you. and what a sweet vibrato he uses on "arseholes". and FINALLY, we get a bass solo. i love a good bass solo and it's always beautiful to hear steve playing one. i love the contrast to some other songs they're playing (that will follow later), like how this is so much calmer than "no you don't" for example. i love how mick always checks in with everyone - like, he's the driving force, the percussions define the tempo of a song. and he's always looking around, making sure he keeps the beat steady. and i love this song cause we get the full show of brian-steve harmonies, especially the short key shift towards the end. they just give me shivers. also, in the original performance, i think "solid gold brass" is around the middle somewhere, so you can already hear brian's voice being a little strained and YET he still delivers his vocals so astonishingly well. i love the ending. andy is flexing his solo and mick just smirks and goes "not bad." - i love that brother energy, plus we get to see a little of their characters beneath the attitude.

E) "Sweet F.A."

i love the velvety voice brian has when he's moderating. bless this angel. mick starting with that focused drumming and then steve's bassline comes in and you just know, the song is gonna ROCK hard now. (i love sweet f.a., i am biased.) also, the song lyrics itself are pretty simple and i gotta say, i like that. it doesn't always have to be a complex poem. i love what they've got going on in the chorus. andy-mick-steve harmonising and brian bringing in the other part with raw power!!! so then we come to something i am not sure i even have adequate words for. mick plays the tubular bells and the drums at the same time. and to have another hand available (as he wasn't born with three arms although it sometimes feels like it), he shoves one of his drumsticks into his mouth. and. i. am. left. speechless. so, multitasking like that is no problem, huh?? he's just, you know? casually able to do that. and we're not gonna talk about it? well, I WOULD?? okay, aside from this looking cool as fuck, you're playing two different instruments at the same time. he has to keep the steady beat and also be on point with the correct tubular bell. that is a skill, friends. ALSO, ANDY ON SYNTHESIZERS. have i mentioned already how much i love the rhythm of "sweet f.a."? it's just beautiful. good hard rock. stevie being a casual and unbothered bass king whenever the cam cuts to him, i love him. mick again showing why exactly he's one of the greatest. he drops one of his drumsticks to play the gong and IMMEDIATELY turns around again to continue the drums. that coordination and talent??? CAN WE TALK ABOUT IT MORE??? can we please please please start appreciating the man more??? he's goddamn talented. are we sure he's not a god who sometimes struggles to hide he's not human? stevie comes in and checks on brian and then mick and he communicate with each other, we love a well coordinated rhythm section. also, THE SMILES. and the harmonies. look, i'm a sucker for harmonies, you will always get me with them and sweet? they're top-tier. the harmonies without brian in-between? new sound, always gets a bonus point from me, just like mick is always locking in on andy to keep the tempo constant. of course, drumstick twirling!!!!! andy puts on a show when he soloes, and i am here for it. go show off, i am proud of you!! he's an underrated guitarist. plus, i love the way steve and mick are absolutely focused on him, the rhythm section keeping it all together. also, the way these two always communicate one way or another, like, that's what you need to have a stable foundation for a band - perfectly synced bass and drums. mick gets bored somewhere during playing and just throws in a few drumming flexes and i love him for it. can we appreciate the way andy is all vibing while the secret rhythm section communication log between steve and mick has like twelve pages in this song alone already. THE ENDING IS SO CONFUSING THOUGH, DID MICK JUST PLAY THE GONG WITH HIS FOOT????? LIKE, THERE'S A FAINT GONG, BUT IT ALSO DOESN'T SOUND AS HOLLOW AS THE PLAYBACK IN MWTGA DOES. I AM SO CONFUSED??? and at the same time i wouldn't be surprised if you told me he did. honestly, is there anything this man can't do on drums???? please, appreciation for him.

F) "The Six Teens"

before i start, i think i have to tell you that i absolutely love six teens. it's so beautiful, oh my god.

so that's why the intro alone is giving me chills, it's sheer and raw power - foreshadowing of what's to come. and then brian starts to sing and his voice is pure velvet. close your eyes and just enjoy the way he tells the story. the way the sound travels and unfolds through the concert place. we have mick's drumming talent and i LOVE it so much. AND WE HAVE STEVIE POSING AROUND WHEN HE GETS HIS SOLO VOCALS, I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. look, what has me feeling intense emotions is the way they structured the chorus. we have the softer, calmer first part - their voices are quieter. and then we get this powerful shift to the four-way harmony for the second time where everyone just gives their all and it's so raw and loud and pure rock and i am crying because this is so fucking good. especially the "all" part. it's just this little word and we have them building up one of their strongest harmonies ever - on these three letters. i cannot stress it enough - sweet know what they're doing, they know how to get the most out of their individual vocal ranges and they know how to combine their voices together to create a sweeping chord. just appreciating that fact. and of course, mick tucker twirling around his drumsticks is always a blessing. WE GET THE ICONIC BRIAN-STEVE HARMONIES FOR THE SECOND VERSE AGAIN. these two have voices that were made to work with each other, to swirl around each other, to create the perfect vocals together. (plus, stevie pushing the strand out of his face - i love the little gestures that make him look softer immediately.) steve's cocky attitude when delivering his solo vocals is perfection. he's the diva and he will show it off. MICK GETTING MORE DOMINANT VOCALS IN THE CALM CHORUS, WE STAN, (i love his voice so much) AND THEN WE GET OFFSET STEVIE VOCALS FOR THE POWERFUL CHORUS. ah, what a time to be alive to see this magnificence at all times. then we get another absolutely cool cat guitar solo from andy scott himself and i just wish he'd get more recognition for it. (I SAW HIM LIVE LAST YEAR AND HE STILL KILLS IT!!!!) what made me chuckle again is brian and his microphone-antics. he just goes on, playing around with the technical equipment. i really wonder how many microphone stands he broke during their career. something i cannot stress often enough - mick tucker on drums. please, just take the time to listen to live at musikladen - one time just for his drumming. you will notice how much power and skill is right there. i love the last verse - it's so HARD AND VIGOROUS (and also, it's gay which are HUGE bonus points from me!!!!!). and of course we get an ending to honour it. steve's mocking laugh and flexing his arm, i literally cannot get enough of him and his attitude. AND THEN THE FINALE IS JUST FHAJFBKJBFWEFSNFSKDF. WE GET ONE CHORUS WITH BRIAN AND STEVE TOGETHER AND THEY BOTH HAVE THESE IMMENSELY POWERFUL CHEST VOICES AND I MIGHT BE SCREAMING AT THIS POINT CAUSE I CAN LITERALLY FEEL ADRENALINE RUSHING THROUGH MY OWN BODY EVEN THOUGH I AM WATCHING THIS PERFORMANCE 50 YEARS AFTER IT HAPPENED. and the last two "all" parts - my heart is full and i am just completely high on whatever drugs my body produces when i listen to music. what a fucking performance. and there are still two songs left to talk about. (although six teens is the original closing song and could they have chosen any better? i don't think so.)

G) "Man With The Golden Arm"

aaaaah, mick on drums. a blessing to the world. thank you for this video, planet earth. look, i am a HUGE fan of his drumming style. he's got a unique skill and was NEVER appreciated on the level his talent demanded. so excuse me, if this turns into me writing a love letter to mick tucker and mwtga, but dear universe, does that man deserve more recognition.

let's just start by talking about he just casually drinks with one hand and twirls his drumstick with the other while looking directly into the cam. fucking iconic. and then he fucking yeets the drumstick across stage and something explodes. talk about a memorable intro. we gotta talk about the fact what a well attuned team of players andy, mick and stevie are. they are in perfect sync and it's satisfying to watch, oh my god. ANDY'S SING-SCREAM IS PERFECTION AND ONCE AGAIN, HOW HIGH IS HE ABLE TO GO?????????? when i attempt to mimic that i sound like a tortured cat. AND IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE IN MY VOCAL RANGE??? anyways, WE GET A BASS SOLO, YAYAYAYAYA. i love how mick stands up and points his drumstick towards steve to direct attention onto him and steve just gets the biggest grin on his face. their relationship is everything to me. andy gives us some cool riffs and then, we arrive at that moment. the moment where mick just goes nuts on drums and i fucking admire the skill and the perfomance so much. i originally didn't want to say much about how and what he's playing because that's a show you watch and enjoy and are awed by all on your own. however, i have a few thoughts i wanna share. yeah, i know, the cuts are irritating sometimes, but it shouldn't distract too much from the main focus - holy hell, mick is a fucking force. the speed at which he plays and it's always completely SPOT ON!!!! and he is having so much fun - he rightfully gets to show off his talent and i am so glad the band gave him the room he deserved. i mean, he gives us one-handed drumming while twirling his drumstick with the other hand. come on. that is talented. you see him doing that a lot during live at musikladen, also during "no you don't". I MEAN, THAT MAN CAN DO A FUCKING DRUMROLL ONE-HANDED, HELLO??? can we please, please, appreciate him more? like, as an absolutely perfect drummer? and the gong, i love it. and then we get the tubular bells. this time not just casually in the middle of the song, but as his actual main focus. and yes, he hits the wrong one, but you can see he still has fun playing and that it doesn't bother him one bit!! he has a good laugh about it and continues to play. and i think that's what makes him even more perfect. like, he messes up a little, but just goes on to further have fun and do what he excels at. we're all human, we're not 100 % top-tier perfect at all the time. it matters that we have fun with it and don't let our mistakes take away the joy. also, mick's smile always lightens up the entire day, so there's that. we get the count for our bassist and our guitarist to be back and then they join their forces again to bring down the roof for a grand finale. and i love it. plus, even when the other two are back, mick is still giving the show on drums.

H) "No You Don't"

okay, maybe i lied. maybe i did a certain order because i wanted my favourite song to be the glorius last. my personification of what sweet's hard rock is and what the entire music industry has slept on for 50 years - "no you don't".

the beginning of the song alone with mick having the biggest smile on his face, counting and then opening the song with a KILLER drum performance. and then we get what will always kill me - steve priest on lead vocals. he has a GORGEOUS voice and he is so underestimated and underrated as a lead singer. he does an AMAZING job. more love for stevie lead vocals please. (do i have a spotify playlist with him on lead vocals? maybe) and then, the blend to brian taking over. HOLY HOLY FUCKING GODDAMN SHIT, their voices blend SO WELL. and the way steve just looks so huffy when brian comes in earlier than planned. i love him. mick's drumming throughout this entire song is top-notch, especially the transitions from lyric to lyric. how fun drumming lessons with mick would've been? and i love the chorus vocals. mick, andy and steve doing the "no you don't" part and brian responding to that with utter force and raw power in his voice. it's fucking epic. and let me tell you about mick tucker drumming one-handed while twirling a drumstick in his other hand. he can do one-handed what most drummers need both their hands for, just pay attention. more often than not he only uses one hand for delivering a spectacular drumming performance. what also absolutely sells this "no you don't" version is the utter cocky attitude steve uses to deliver his vocals. i am in awe. god, i can't shut up about the harmonies they use. andy going in high, steve throwing in his force of a chest voice and mick balancing the other two out with his solid middle ground notes. we get the instrumental break where they all turn around (except for stevie) and it's so unexpected - to have them do nothing for a few moments. it's a nice contrast. mick and andy start to play again (stevie does to, he's just not in the shot right now) and can we talk about mick having so much energy and force he loses TWO drumstick playing so little??? and his smirk is literally killing me. that man KNOWS he's a top-tier drummer and he likes to show off (which i do not mind, please give me all the reason in the world to adore you). fucking hell, mick tucker - what a man. then he starts setting the rhythm and pace and steve and andy are locking in on him - again, exactly what you need from a stable rhythm section, so especially steve and mick need to be 100 % in sync here. and they're both handling it amazingly. and for the grand finale, we get one last chorus with their PERFECT HARD ROCK HARMONIES AND THEIR SHEER RAW POWER. every day my ears are blessed with listening to this and i will never, never shut up about it. goddamn perfection.

so, if you wanna watch an epic rock performance, go to youtube and look at these videos. they're available. for free. 24/7. what a time to be alive. i still can't believe this exists and still people just think they're glam rock and bubblegum pop. of course they started with that and chinnichap didn't really want to let them escape from that, but sweet are a top-notch rock band, especially hard and prog rock (level headed everyone). live at musikladen just proves over and over again what an incredible musical variety these men had and i wish they would get the recognition they deserve. to sum it up, i love them and their style and their music and their craft. they are incredible and "no you don't" live at musikladen might just be my favourite live perfomance of anything ever. andy is an underrated guitarist with creative solos and a sweet sweet falsetto, brian with his dual voice sound (velvety soft and raw power), steve with his bass solos and cocky attitude and strong chest voice and mick, the most underrated, most skilled drummer. they are what makes sweet so fucking top-tier and not even posthumously (except for andy) they get the recognition they deserve. which is a reason i wrote this post about them and live at musikladen. make people aware of just how good they were.

i thank you for your time reading this and putting up with my takes and my english.

kila

[topazadine]

Common Writing Issues that Reduce Readability

A short little Monday post so that we stop pissing readers off!

Beyond the usual issues that are easily fixed, like typos, there lie a few more pernicious problems that can drag readers out of a story kicking and screaming. Unfortunately, they happen to nearly everyone, no matter their skill level, and must be watched for carefully.

Now, I want to note that I am never attempting to prescribe how you should write. However, I want you to think back to the last time you read something that made you roll your eyes and give up - it's likely that at least one of these problems was present.

Here is the sum-up, and then we'll talk details. I will be showing examples of my own writing that include these deadly sins, so feel free to point and laugh.

Double describing

Overly long sentences

Overexplaining

Head hopping

Again, a big disclaimer.

I can't tell you how to write, this is just my opinion, you are the crafter of your own story, take what you like and leave the rest.

Alright, let's get into it.

Double Describing

Describing the same thing in two different ways right next to one another feels repetitive and annoying; it comes across as self-indulgent, like you're more interested in showing off how smart you are than telling a story. I have been a perennial offender in this, as shown by my story "Beyond Mortal Sight."

Here, I've highlighted the things that were double-described in blue. This includes:

The underworld

Higekiri

The crypt

The room being mostly empty

Pick the strongest descriptor and cut the other ones. You might think that this makes your writing weaker, but it actually strengthens it, as you're not diluting the description and can move along faster.

If you're not sure whether you're double describing, try removing one of the selections and see if you're still describing what you wanted to. Maybe you just need to tweak one of them, but both of them can still stand on their own; in that case, differentiate them more, or move them so that they are not right next to each other in order to provide better emphasis.

Now, sometimes you really do want to linger on a specific description, and that's fine. However, you need to ensure that you're looking at different aspects of the same thing.

I do end up lingering on the moths for a long while, and it doesn't get too repetitive (at least I don't think so) because I'm describing different elements of them.

Overly Long Sentences

The longer a sentence is, the harder it is to emphasize certain things, and the more likely that a reader will get lost aong the way and need to reread things. Of course, we want readers to take our time with the work, but paradoxically, readers are more willing to linger and reread with shorter sentences because they're not getting frustrated and glossing over key elements.

Take a look at this section of my story "A Tale of Two Citadels," which I've been meaning to rework for ages because it has chronic logorrhea. The sheer length of these damn sentences!

Right off the bat, we see that the first sentence blasts past the typical "four lines max" rule. The second one is slightly better, but it still has way too many clauses and can be confusing. The third one can easily be cut up into at least two sentences, maybe three, without losing the rhythm.

When reworked, you can see how much better it flows by the color coding.

The sentences are still complex, but they're more manageable for readers. The longer a sentence, the more difficult it is, and the more likely that your reader will get lost.

At the same time, you do want some complexity and variety in your sentence lengths. These are all about the same length, which can become a bit boring.

If I were really committed to editing this, I'd go further and add some very short sentences too.

Reading your sentences out loud, or using an auto dictation tool, can be very helpful to see whether you're overdoing it with sentence length. If you have to stop to take multiple breaths while reading a single sentence, then it is probably too long.

You can also color-code while you are editing to see whether your sentences are all around the same length. If so, see if you can cut a few of them up.

Overexplaining

This issue often shows up more when we are explaining why something happened, but it can start to feel boring and repetitive. As an example from my story "Shattered Pieces:"

This part happened right after someone was stabbed and, frankly, takes away a LOT of the tension from the story.

Is it really necessary at this exactly this second, when someone is lying on the ground bleeding, to explain why the incident happened? No, it's not. Half of this could be removed and the story would read so much better, like so:

Now we can move to the juicy stuff of Uguisumaru lying on the ground bleeding to death. Much more important.

A crucial element of writing is to reveal details as they become important, not before. This doesn't mean hiding things from your reader, nor throwing in things at random whenever you feel like; rather, it's about not forcing your reader to do the work of holding onto this information in the hopes that it will become important at some later time.

Is what Mikazuki thinking about here really that important to the overall story? No, we don't need that information. Maybe they can talk about it later, or maybe it will never be discussed.

Now, a quick sidetrack about foreshadowing here. Great foreshadowing works by not feeling like toil and by not beating the reader over the head with the information. They pick up on it, but they don't feel like they need to hold onto it. Careful foreshadowing sprinkled throughout a story feels effortless and natural, without imposing a cognitive load on the reader.

As I've mentioned before when discussing fantasy in general, we do not want our reader to feel like they are doing work. Few of us are at the level of someone like Mark Z. Danielewski, where we can create a book that is all about doing work but readers will still enjoy it because it is that entertaining. (I did not like House of Leaves personally, but that's just me.)

Therefore, our goal is to reduce friction as much as possible while still developing a fun, compelling, thought-provoking piece of fiction. We do this by avoiding infodumping, as I did in that above passage, and revealing information as it becomes important without seeming like things just come out of nowhere. That's where foreshadowing becomes crucial.

Head Hopping

This one is discussed often, but it's also really easy to accidentally do when you're working in third-person limited (my preferred POV). In small cases of dipping into someone else's head, it doesn't really cause concern for the reader, who might not even notice it, but it does make it harder to keep track of the main POV.

It's also important not to dip too often into peoples' heads while you're doing omniscient POV, either. Here, in this segment of "Dreams Within Dreams," we have at least four partial POVs, which I have color coded:

This is technically fine for an omniscient POV, but dipping into too many heads too quickly can become overwhelming and exhausting for the reader. Thankfully, it is an easy fix by simply removing the assumptions of judgment and focusing entirely on the actions.

I mean, it's still not the greatest writing, but we have a more opaque, birds-eye view of everyone, rather than constantly jumping in and out of everyone's head.

This is especially hard not to do when you have numerous characters all together in one scene, which is why it is often easier to avoid having a huge group of individuals together, especially if you're not confident in your skills yet.

The more characters you juggle, the more you need to ensure that you're not leaving anyone out and that everyone gets at least one line without it feeling choppy. This scene definitely could have used a lot more work so as to feel more natural. But that's the joy of fanfiction! It's all about learning and growing as a writer.

Nowadays, I try to limit my scenes to two "main" talkers and then add at least one line for other side characters if I have a big group, but I specify that they're off doing something else so people don't wonder where the hell they went.

And that's about it for today! Again, my posts are never about telling you how to write. I am sharing what I have learned as both a reader and writer so that you can make the choices that best fit your story. Happy writing!

If you enjoyed this, perhaps you'll consider purchasing my book, 9 Years Yearning, a gay coming-of-age romance set in a fantasy world. Which does not include any of these sins. Only $2.99 or ZERO DOLLARS with Kindle Unlimited!

If you're not sure about spending your hard-earned money, check out this review to learn more.

[jjmaybankssurfergf]

Shout out to these MotherFuckers:

rory-maybankk is the leading bitch account tumblr

For starters, these fuckers are disgusting whores why? Because they have been cyberbullying, doxxing, sending death threats, and exposing private information. These people are the most disgusting people on fucking planet earth for bullying an 18 year old on twitter and tumblr which is absolutely disturbing and fucking gross. Funny how theyre all jiara shippers too, im fucking pissed off because they are exposing private information about my best friend and doxxing her and posting pictures of her and making her feel threatened and unsafe. Also heres a little information i read about doxxing in case yall wanna know if its fucking illegal

as you scroll down and read it is illegal to a certain point and how far you take it, lemme show examples

Doxxing is the act of revealing someone's personal information online without their permission. This information can include their real name, home address, workplace, phone number, and financial information. Doxxing can have serious consequences, including:

Harassment

Identity theft

Humiliation

Loss of job

Rejection from family and friends

Damage to reputation

Increased anxiety

Reduced confidence and self-esteem 

IntentDoxxing can be illegal if it's intended to: 

Threaten or harm someone 

Intentionally cause emotional distress 

Incite others to cause harm 

Make someone fear for their safety 

Now in this case its fucking illegal because these bitches are all ganging up on one person to fucking cyberbully and harass, i am beyond pisses about this and the person who is being bullied on here is filing a formal complaint to the police right now so anyone who is involved will be pressed charges if they don't stop now. This is beyond disgusting and evil and vile you all will for sure rot in hell for this. Funny thing how this even happened is because my friend doesnt like jiara and she doesnt like lilah pate, so they thought it would be a fun cruel game to harass the shit out of her and send death threats to her which is absolutely unexceptable. This is why the fandom of obx and jiara shippers are so fucking gross, disgusting and hated. because they like to take things wayyyy to fucking far and like to harass people till they get their way. I am absolutely disgusted by this behavior, and i know its wrong to wish bad things on people but i really hope all of the people that i listed on here go burn in fucking hell, they do not deserve to live for theyre disgusting actions and im so pissed off by their immaturity and actions. You all should be sent to prison for this shit and i hope karma bites you in the fucking ass and i hope it hurts the fucking hell.

more info about doxxing:

How much can you sue for doxxing?

A state bill would allow doxxing victims to sue those responsible in civil court for as much as $30,000, plus attorneys' fees and court costs. Supporters say it's needed to stem online harassment against LGBTQ residents and others.Jun 27, 2024

Those who "disseminate, disclose or transfer" the aforementioned data to third parties face a penalty of two to five prison years (one to three years of prison and fines of twelve to twenty-four months, if not directly involved in their discovery but "with knowledge of its illicit origin").

If you've been doxxed, you can contact your local police department if you feel your safety is at risk. You can also pursue legal action, such as sending a cease and desist letter or filing a legal complaint. 

Doxxing is defined as publishing someone else's information online without their permission. It's important to note that publishing information that is already publicly available online or in public records is not doxxing. 

Interstate Doxxing Prevention ActThis bill would make it a federal crime to publish someone's personal information with the intent to threaten, harass, or stalk them. The penalty for violating this bill could include up to five years in prison, a fine, or both. 

Im tagging this to multiple outer banks tags because that whole drama is what caused this, simply because my friend does not like lilah pate and jiara. People have a fucking right to disagreewiht you or to not like the same things as you. Doxxing people is not ok im extremely pissed off at their immaturity and their actions and i hopr they see this, because i am also going to be filing a complaint to my police department about it too. You all deserve to go to hell and rot in prison, this is fucking disgusting.

Ziggy 🌼

[damnfandomproblems]

OP of 763565544500854784

Won't be replying again but since people seem to think I'm a radfem over this one I will be explaining the content of my ask once and then ignoring all further discussion.

No, I do not think all woman in fandom who like men over women are pick mes or have internalized misogyny or whatever insults you want to throw at me and I also do not believe it's wrong to like mostly males. Most of my favorite characters of all time are guys. Probably a 7:3 ratio there if we're being real and most of women on that list are based on old nostalgia from when I was a kid and probably wouldn't be my favorites now. No I will not be providing a list because if people have decided I'm a radfem based on one ask I am not coming off anon or leaving identifying information behind I'm not stupid. I'm not risking somebody cross referencing my shit to send anon hate.

The big titty gf is not literal about what I'm referencing, it's a reference to "big titty goth gf" jokes and the smurfette trope, where a piece of media would have a single girl character who's primary personality trait is "girl." if for kids and "girl who breasts boobily down the stairs" if for adults. Because one of the common defenses towards hating on woman characters is that they don't have a personality beyond those two traits. They're just love interests an author can't bring themself to flesh out beyond "In love with guy character." It was not meant to shame people with big tits or act like big tits are explicitly sexual traits and if the nature of that was so unclear that you've decided I'm a radfem then you're engaging in the same piss on pour reading comprehension you think I did when I read the submission given I literally use it as a hypothetical that other people are using to refer to why the don't like the characters (she has big boobs and is meant to be sexy eye candy and that's it) and not why I wouldn't like a character.

What I am saying, in plain text as possible in response to the op, is that when we see people who only like white characters (or white passing), and act like all dark skinned poc are awful or boring, we call them racist. If we see people who exclusively ship M/F ships and minimize M/M or F/F pairings and cry "why can't they just be friends", we call them homophobic. When we see people shitting on gender headcanons and misgendering canonically trans characters, we call them transphobic.

So then why is it suddenly not sexist to call all female characters boring or uninteresting when the only trait they share is "girl"?

[In before "But you're still not reading the submission right" the submission is specifically saying that you're not solving real world woman issues by telling fans they're misogynistic. This is true. It's not going to make right wing politicians retract the abortion ban overnight or fix wage gaps or any other real world issues. Fandom is not activism and at the end of the day you're not going to change the world by being inclusive in fanfiction and nobody is going to care if the most active spokesperson for women's rights in the world only reads and writes slash fanfiction when it comes to the real world good she's doing. Same as reading and consuming darkfic does not make you an advocate for awful things happening to people or normalize it. You're not responsible for fixing all the woes of modern media with the fanfiction you're writing late at night getting home from work/school.

But it is still annoying when you come across your millionth post that is tagged "female character name here bashing" or "anti-female character name" or a fic that ignores the girls because they're so "uninteresting" to the author. You're still annoying even if no harm is being done and you can do real world, tangible good and still have sexist opinions on media. Nobody is calling you a bad person for it they're just telling you that before you decide every women in every media ever is uninteresting maybe look at yourself and try to figure out why you think that and understand why if you find even the most compelling fictional women boring, people are going to start assuming there might be some sexist biases here.]

Posting as a response to a previous ask.

[mooseyspooky]

Why do you think Morrissey has been acting like this lately? Is it because Marr turn down a reunion? I don't think he only wanted the reunion for the money. I also feel like Morrissey feels irrelevant and forgotten and thought that maybe a reunion might give a new life to his career

Darren asked me about this yesterday, and I wrote a whole essay about it. I think just copying it here will be a good answer to this.

Darren: How are we feeling about the moz and Johnny news

Me: Pretty indifferent. Same shit another day. I mean they survived the court case and banged all the way through the early to mid 2000s to 2009

Moz having a tantrum is nothing new

I was very sad to hear Johnny said no to a reunion

But it's not like I don't get it

Andy passed last year

Johnny wanted Moz back in 2008 and Moz ghosted him after promising he was totally on board

Moz didn't show up for the 2006 fundraiser concert for Andy's dad's cancer

Which is pretty ruthless

Moz clearly hasnt opened a single email Johnny sent him since 2018 when Johnny filed the trademark and tried to get him to cosign

Which is insane because Johnny did it specifically to stop Mike Joyce (the Classically Smiths venture that he tried roping Andy into, though Andy backed out at the last minute. Some say because of his cancer, but I'm sure Johnny being so pissed off about it he got lawyers involved was also a part of it)

Which is literally something Moz should be gagging to do at all times 24/7

And meanwhile nothing

And then Johnny continued to try, even sending the paperwork again this year in January and nothing

So i mean why would Johnny want a reunion

Moz wants it to happen a year after Andy is buried, it's too late

Does it hurt I don't get to see them together on stage ever, yes, but I'm not like

Demented

If I was Johnny I'd be so fucking tired

Like beyond exhausted

Sharing a stage with him?

Putting up with him on tour?

Moz canceled over 50% of shows last year

No explanation, sometimes on the _day of_

Just wouldn't do them

I mean Johnny won't cancel a show if his grandma dies

Moz just

Cancels cause it's a slightly breezy day out and that offends him

Yes I love Moz, I am his ride or die, I will go to my grave obsessed with him and everything about him

But I am aware and understanding he is extremely fickle and can be very stupid

This is all happened, literally all of it, cause Johnny made very light fun of him on Twitter

Like barely a joke

Johnny saw some popular girl on Twitter who is a super fan

Saw she mentioned a reunion

Didn't tag him

And Johnny posted a picture of a far right dude in England that Moz protested the treatment of in prison one time like- i don't know. 7 years ago

They put the guy in a prison where he was at high risk, and Moz made a slight offhanded comment saying it was cruel

So now here we are, with Johnny posting a picture of a guy

To a Smiths super fan

Who didn't tag him

Who mentioned a reunion

Because she saw Oasis get back together

And Moz got _so upset_

He decided to throw an absolute shit fit

And now Johnny has to be like literally can you calm down

And in some ways I understand both sides

Moz just

His sort of...recurring thing

Is that he really really hates when Johnny won't stick up for him

Or when Johnny is quiet when people are dog piling on him

Johnny did that a lot in the 90s

During the NME smear campaign, for instance, and the court case

And it really broke Moz up

Like, and I can imagine it did hurt

To be so close and so in love and meanwhile Johnny won't do anything. Just sit there and refuse to say anything

That's probably heartbreaking

Especially with Moz being so. Like. Blindly in belief that Johnny is forever innocent, forever perfect ("the always innocent young cabin boy")

There is no flaw

But Johnny is a human being, too, who has a lot going on

And to then see Johnny, here in 2024, once again. After 30 years not stand up for him

But instead making teasing posts on Twitter

Even if they're not cruel

I could see it causing Moz to have a meltdown

Should he be? At 65? No. He should be over it

But he's not

He still wants Johnny to love him, to defend him

And so yes he did have a total split from sanity for a bit but at the end of the day. I think the underlining thing is is that it stems from Moz being so deeply infatuated with his first love that he can't stand even the slightest notion Johnny isn't still as infatuated with him

Johnny was able to move on, to continue to keep his marriage, he was able to maintain friendships and have a lot of normal stuff that Moz couldn't because autism

Undiagnosed unrecognized autism but all the same

Moz is still, in his mind, deeply entrenched in the belief that Johnny is perfect and slight diversions from that cause major malfunctions

Moz clearly doesn't give a shit about the trademark thing. He's ignored it since 2018. Moz has talked about loathing albums being repackaged (Paint a Vulgar Picture), so clearly the greatest hits thing doesn't really bother him

Moz wanting a reunion, sure. Okay. Maybe that stung but my god he had to expect it

So what does Moz care about?

Johnny

That's it. Period.

He wants Johnny to love him and be obsessed with him forever, and that's the long and the short of it so.