#I don't have the patience to remember this for the website so he can be a special lil dashboard cat

[somegrumpynerd]

There's a cat on your dashboard! He's wearing a little robe, how cute! Maybe if you get closer you could pet him?

Pet button

[subbmissivesuccubus]

I don't know if this kink has a name but I am just obsessed with super casual boob play lmao

Also!!?? Thank you guys for helping me reach 2K followers! It's so exciting and i've been having so much fun writing and reading the smut on this website. Here's to many more stories which hopefully give you the tingles <3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Alright, so that's the groceries we need for this week."

"Mmm."

"Oh, don't forget to buy flowers! It's my moms birthday tomorrow."

"Mmm."

"Are you even listening?" you asked, crossing your arms over your chest as you glared at your boyfriend, the man simply staring at you.

"Mmm."

"Ok, so that's a no." you said, rolling your eyes before snapping your fingers in front of your boyfriends face, the man jumping and blinking a few times as he was brought back to reality.

"Can you pay attention now?" you asked sternly.

"Sorry. I was too busy staring at your tits." he said honestly, making you sigh. There he goes again with his very obvious boob obsession, your man having a clear fetish for your breasts.

"Well, if you continue to ignore me, you won't see my boobs for a week."

"Or, you flash them to me now, I promise I'll remember every single word you say."

"Oh my God."

"Come here, baby. Come here." he begged, hands reaching out to quickly grab you by the hips and drag you forward, his nails digging into the fabric of your skirt as he all but manhandled you onto his lap, smiling at you as he got your legs to straddle his waist.

"You're a degenerate." you snarled as you placed your hands on his shoulder, more than familiar with this particular song and dance.

"I'm your degenerate. And besides, this is your fault you know." he said, casually fisting the hem of your t-shirt before pulling it up, "If you didn't have such perfect titties, I wouldn't be like this!"

"So you weren't obsessed with boobs before you met me?" you questioned, allowing him to tug the t-shirt upto your chin, the man greedily looking at your bra covered breasts. Not having the patience to take the shirt off of you completely, he simply pulled it over your head so it looped around the back of your neck, your arms still in the sleeves but he didn't care as all he wanted was access to his favorite part of you.

"Of course not." he said confidently as he all but face planted into your cleavage, groaning in delight as he pushed his face in as deep as he could go, "I only got obsessed when you came into the picture."

You huffed, trying to fight the blood rushing to your face and between your legs as you fisted a hand through his hair, tugging at it a bit as you got his attention:

"Are you going to listen to me now?"

"Mmhmm." your boyfriend groaned, nodding a yes against your boobs, truly happy being surrounded by your plump flesh. Sighing, you once again told him what he needed to buy for groceries, allowing him to grope and kiss you wherever he wanted. His tongue ran over your skin, huffing and humming in response every time you asked him if he was listening.

He soon pushed your bra up as well, too eager to bother unhooking it as he placed it against your collarbone, the elastic of the band digging into your skin and making your tits look even more delicious than before. He opened his mouth and took a nipple in, closing his eyes as he started suckling gently, his arms wrapped around you and pulling you in closer.

"H-Hey..." you moaned, gripping his hair tighter as he suckled on you, "It's getting late. You need to leave before the stores close."

"Mmhmm. I know." he muttered against you, tongue coming out to flick at your nipples a few times before he moved to the other breast, giving her the same treatment, "Just- fuck- give me a minute."

You sighed, jumping as you felt his hands move down to your ass, taking greedy gropes of your butt as he lost himself in the sensation of your breast in his mouth.

Yeah, you were not getting your groceries today.

~~~~~

You slipped away from the group of friends in the living room to your bedroom, wanting to get your phone which had hopefully finished charging by now. As you were checking your phone and responding quickly to a few messages, you suddenly felt a hand on your waist that swiftly moved upwards and groped your right breast.

"Eh-hey!" you hissed softly, head snapping back towards your boyfriend, his touch so familiar that you instantly knew it was him, "Cut it out! We have guests!"

"I know but I just need one suck, ok?" he asked even as his other hand came up to start unbuttoning your shirt dress, "I'll be super quick, I promise."

"You- ah!" you squealed as he got the buttons undone enough to expose your bra, his fingers digging into the cup of the right side to pull it down, revealing your bare breast to the crisp air. He turned you around and quickly bent down and took the nipple into his mouth. Your head kept snapping between him sucking your nipple and the door, on edge as if anyone walks in, it would be very obvious.

Your man groaned as he suckled on your nipple, eyelashes tickling your skin as he closed his eyes. The sound of the TV and chattering was loud enough to thankfully drown out his groans, your boyfriend suckling you so hard it made your toes curl.

"Wh-you-" you hissed as his hand quickly pulled down the other cup of your bra and exposed your other breast, "You said only one!"

"I know but I can't not suck her too!" he protested, giving your left nipple a greedy lick, "she'll get jealous!"

"What the fuck are you talking abooouuttt!" you gasped as he suddenly took the nipple in and sucked on it as well, just as vigorously. You stood there for a few seconds, allowing your maniac of a boyfriend to suck and feel you up before he finally pulled away.

"Just what I needed. Thank you baby." he said, kindly helping you stuff your tits back into your bra and right your dress, giving your tits a final squeeze before he walked out of the room, leaving you a frustrated mess with your nipples tingling.

What a menace.

~~~~~

It was movie night, one of your favorite ways to spend time together. It was always a treat to just relax with your boyfriend, put on a random movie, eat popcorn and talk.

And of course, he also loved that he gets to play with your tits the whole time.

You huffed as your boyfriend pulled you onto his lap, his legs spread wide to accommodate you between them. Bowl of popcorn in hand, you munched away at the treat even as your man slid his hands up your shirt, aiming for your breasts.

"Ew, why are you wearing a bra?" he asked, clicking his tongue as his hands got in contact with the soft fabric.

"Sometimes I like having my boobs supported by something, ok? Fucking sue me."

"You don't need a bra to support your tits when you have my hands. I'm taking it off."

Before you could even protest, your man slid his hands to your back and unhooked the bra masterfully, practically an expert at it at this point. He was about to push the straps down your arms and pull the bra out from under your shirt but then he realized- why are you wearing a shirt? You might as well be topless as he was going to play with your boobs the whole time anyway.

So with your shirt and bra tossed onto the floor, you tried your best to focus on the movie playing on screen even as your boyfriend happily groped away at your tits. Ample flesh spilling out between his fingers, he squeezed you like a toy- like your tits were something he could use to alleviate stress. Occasionally, he'd flick his fingers over your nipples, working them up to stiff peaks before gently pinching them between his thumb and index finger. He'd place his hands underneath your breasts, cupping them before he bounced them up and down, loving the feeling of your heavy flesh landing on his palms, the ripple of your breasts on impact instantly making his cock hard.

And of course, as usual, once he was done playing with his hands (which was practically an hour long activity), he'll move onto his mouth. Your body automatically moved along with him as he lifted you up a bit higher onto his lap, looping an arm over his shoulder so he had the space to lean down and take a nipple into his mouth.

"Y-You're not even watching the movie, are you?"

"Mm-mmm" he responded, shaking his head no against your breast, his response making you shiver. You rolled your eyes and continued to watch the movie, failing at it even before he started sliding his hand into your pants.

~~~~~

Of course, your boob obsessed boyfriend can't sleep unless it's on said boobs.

"Take it offfff!" he whined, wrestling with you as he harshly tugged at your shirt.

"It's cold!" you protested as you tried to pull the fabric back down over you, "I'm going to freeze!"

"I'll keep you warm! You know the rules- no clothes in bed."

"You're wearing clothes!"

"Yes but I don't have a pair of delicious tits that are just begging to be suckled!"

"Oh my God- fine, how about this?" you asked, slapping his hand away from your shirt before you pulled up upto your chin, flashing him your bare boobs, "Just get in here and I get to keep the shirt on."

"...Why didn't you just say so?"

You grunted as you were tackled, pushed to lie down on the bed as your boyfriend landed on top of you, face first into your tits. You pulled your shirt over his head, covering the dopey smile on his face as he used his hands to push your tits against him, shaking his head from side to side as he motorboated you.

He thankfully still had some sense to pull the blanket over the two of you and you were able to dim the lights, whipping your phone out so you can get some screen time before you went to sleep. You felt wetness on your left nipple, your boyfriend finally done with shaking your fat tits in his face.

His tongue ran in circles over the hard bud, dragging it slowly as he knew he could take his time. He started flicking your bud harshly, his hot tongue making you shiver with each flick. Eventually, he sealed his lips around it, groaning happily as he started to suck. He was noisy- moaning like he was eating a delicious meal and the slobbering noises of him feasting on you making your ears ring, the pressure he used to suckle on you keeping you on your toes.

As he sucked on the left one, his hand came up to play with the right, toying with her as he got her ready to be sucked next. He rubbed the nipple around with his thumb before pinching it gently, giving her a few twists once in awhile. He was latched onto the same nipple for almost 30 minutes before he moved onto the next one, but not before dragging himself from underneath your shirt and pushing the fabric upto your chin.

Fuck it. You were falling asleep and now your body was running hot so you didn't really care.

"Baby... I want-" he gave your nipple a kiss before he snuggled his face into the fat of your breast before looking up at you, "I want to drink your milk. Make it for me."

"How many biology lessons did you fail for you to think that's possible?" you asked, your eyelids drooping and voice heavy.

"Why are you not pregnant yet? I cum in you like, everyday."

"...You know I'm still on birth control."

"I know but I'm confident I can defeat it."

"Mmkay, keep dreaming. Now shut up- i'm gonna sleep."

"...Stop taking your birth control."

"I'm not having a baby just so you can drink some breast milk."

"Of course not. We'll have a baby because we're in love and we'll be together forever!"

You opened one eye and looked down at him, letting him know you were not impressed.

"...And so I can drink your milk."

"Just keep sucking or sleep."

He pouted before he took your left nipple into his mouth.

~~~~~

Gojo Satoru, Haibara, Shanks, Sanji, Luffy, Ace, Kaeya, Kaveh, Childe, Cyno, Itto, Uzui, Sanemi, Eren, Jean etc. etc.

[piratefalls]

i really did not expect the kind of response these lists are getting. i just do these for fun, but thank you for interacting with them! as always, if you want to be tagged in future lists, just let me know!

with that said, it's wednesday. welcome back to the shit show.

list one. list two. list three.

everything's growing in our garden by matherine

That night, in the safety of his hotel room on the outskirts of the Olympic Village, Henry couldn’t catch his breath. He coughed and coughed, feeling like he was choking on nothing, but there was a scratching sensation in his throat that he just couldn’t shake – until a single blue petal flew past his lips, landing in the porcelain bowl of the sink. After an hour of painstaking Googling, he learns that it’s a Texas bluebonnet. He also learns what the fact that he’s coughing up petals means – the beginning stages of Hanahaki Disease. Rare, but not unheard of, according to the NHS website he browses in an incognito tab. Common in royal bloodlines (thank you, inbreeding). "Only curable if the afflicted’s love is requited with a declaration," he reads, and slams his laptop closed with a bitter laugh, wet with tears. "A surgical procedure removing the afflicted’s capacity for love may be performed if the love remains unrequited. Otherwise, the condition is terminal." So, then. He has no chance.

he is exactly the poem i wanted to write by metacrisis

There is no Turkey in Alex's room this year, but there is a prince. AKA, Henry spends thanksgiving with Alex after the election and reflects on all of his dreams coming true.

(Im)patience is a Virtue by clottedcreamfudge

"Why don't you want to fuck me?" Henry just about manages to avoid spluttering Earl Grey all over the coffee table, but it's a close thing. Alex is staring at him, looking kind of annoyed. "Excuse me?" He's never refused Alex a thing in his whole adult life. Also, he very much wants to do that, but Alex hasn't said anything and usually Henry can't shut him up; he'd assumed Alex would bring it up when he was ready. Which appears to be now.

Handprints in wet cement by kiwiana

“I like learning about all the things that make you you. Especially the sexy parts,” he adds with a grin, and Henry couldn’t contain the laugh that escapes him if he tried. “As long as they’re not, like, bad memories for you, I want to hear about them.” Or, five things Henry learned during his Oxford Slut Phase that he shared with Alex, and one thing they learned together.

best laid plans by rizcriz

Henry knows. He knows Alex is planning a big, extravagant proposal. He shouldn’t know, but he does. He also knows that the ring tucked within his own pocket was purchased long before Alex ever even considered a proposal. Long before either of them should have ever feasibly even considered such ideas as proposals. Alexander Claremont-Diaz, genius that he is, is blissfully unaware of all of that. -- Or, Henry just really wants to be the one to propose, okay?

Soft Shock, Put a Spring in My Step by Mags (sparklepocalypse)

“What, you don’t remember every instant of our torrid fuckathon?” Alex asks, pulling an exaggeratedly offended face. “I am hurt. If I can remember all your middle names, you should be able to remember that time we were so horned up on our new relationship that we managed like, seven positions in a night.”

you know i love a london boy by coffeecatsme

“A very special friendship bracelet,” Bea corrects, with such a delight in her voice that Henry is immediately suspicious. He grabs the darn thing and twists it around, glittery beads shining under the lights of the room. A phone number, if Henry is counting them right. Despite himself, his heart skips a beat. “From the one and only Alexander Claremont-Diaz.” She grins, bouncing on the balls of her feet—the day she stops playing matchmaker for her brother will surely be a cold day in hell. The sole excitement of her life since she doesn’t do romance. Henry twists the bracelet in his hands, counting the numbers again, and then looks up. “Who?” Or, 5 times Alex and Henry keep their relationship a secret and 1 time they don't.

Burnin' Through the Sky by cricketnationrise

This whole thing is Nora’s fault, actually, and he will hold this against her for the rest of their natural lives. Possibly into the next. His personal life is fine. It’s possible he was whining about not having dated anyone since his last boyfriend, but this event is so clearly not going to fix that problem. Or: Alex wasn’t expecting to meet anyone at speed dating, let alone anyone like Henry.

it's (not) the end of the world as we know it by viciouslyqueer

BREAKING NEWS: SHOOTING AT NYC’S GAY CLUB ‘Ritz Bar and Lounge’. June is saying something. He can’t hear her – or anything else for that matter. It’s like his brain decided to shut down and not comprehend anything in front of him. The only thing he’s aware of is a thought at the back of his mind, hitting him with such force it’s all he can focus on – no matter how much it makes his knees give out under him, how his heart feels like it’s being ripped out of his chest and stabbed repeatedly with a sharp knife, cut into a thousand pieces with no possible repair. Henry is in New York. — Actors Alex Claremont-Diaz and Henry Fox meet on the set of ‘Roses, Wisteria, and Royal Bluebells’, and stay friends after filming is over. When a catastrophe happens that tips Alex's world off its axis, he realizes just how deep his feelings for Henry run.

General Incivility by cmere

"Okay, kids, settle down, we're all friends here," Nora cuts in. "And we haven't discussed where the night is going yet. I'm of the personal opinion that we should offer our British guests the quintessential American coming-of-age experience." Alex's eyes widen in what can only be sheer delight. "What, like beer pong?" June says, nose wrinkling. "No," Alex interjects. "Truth or dare." "You read my mind, Alexander." Nora turns to open the mini-fridge. "What would everyone like to drink?" "Henry and I will take vodka if you've got it," Pez says. Henry narrows his eyes at Pez, trying to communicate his alarm, but Pez simply grins back, feral, licking his top teeth.

the conclusion literally any normal human being would come to by chaa_kiao

My [21M] flatmate [20M] gives me forehead kisses when he thinks I'm asleep. How do I ask him to do it when I'm awake, too? ____ Henry and Alex are roommates quarantined together. Henry takes to Reddit when Alex's behavior gets too confusing for him to sort out on his own. Surely this will have zero impact on their completely platonic relationship, right?

all's well that ends well to end up with you by karish

“Fuck, thank you, you’re a lifesaver, Hen,” he says as he closes the small distance between them and places a faint kiss on Henry’s lips. His lips are soft and Alex melts into it for a second before pulling away. He bumps their noses together for good measure before stepping back and grabbing his bag from the chair. When he turns back to look at Henry, he’s still standing still, his eyes wide and his mouth hanging open. Alex can even see a dark flush starting to spread over his face. It looks cute. Alex wishes he could– Oh. Oh shit. Fucking goddamn shit. He just kissed Henry. Fuck.

no sweeter innocence by extasiswings

"Well. Babe. You've been wanting him to dick you down forever, right?" [Or, the one where Alex does, in fact, finally get what he's been waiting for.]

Heartaches and Cupcakes and Sunshine Boys by everwitch

After a public fight involving a little too much cupcake frosting, romance writer Henry Fox must deal with the obsessive speculation that one of his most despicable characters is based on the very successful model turned photographer Alex Claremont-Diaz. Which couldn't be further from the truth. There's a reason for why Henry's love stories are almost always unrequited, immensely emotional yet devoid of any real hope, and that reason is currently vagueing him in a series of scathing tweets that has Henry's publisher calling a crisis meeting. The solution? Henry must rewrite his upcoming sequel in a way that redeems the character in question completely. The problem? Henry's attempt to get away from it all so he can actually write leads to a direct confrontation with Alex himself. After a series of clandestine kitchen encounters, the two of them end up with a very fragile truce. But can you really find friendship, or maybe even more than years of achingly unrequited yearning, when you don't have the courage to let your disguise fall? How do you really tell the difference between fiction, and the truth?

washing machine heart by pissedofsandwich

This time he cannot escape. It's not like the night at the lake, where he can dodge and blame it on mosquitoes, write a stupid note and flee the country. This time Alex keeps him, and he does not let go.

Powerless by floatingaway4

“Do you know what I’ve had to put up with in the last twelve hours?”  Henry wants to point out that in that same twelve hours he’s had his body sliced open and an organ removed, but this doesn’t seem to be the time. He also got to sleep through his experience, while Alex was very much awake while dealing with Henry’s family. And Henry got the nice drugs, while Alex looks like he could use a drink.

Someday We'll Know If Love Can Move a Mountain by allmylovesatonce

The emails were never leaked, but the Queen has forced Alex and Henry apart. Alex believes they're biding their time until they can be together for real. One day at work, he's forced to confront how wrong he is when Henry's engagement is announced. With both of them miserable and neither wanting the wedding to happen, they grapple with how or if they could even stop it. Or even if they should.

"Exclusive Top" My Non-Virgin Ass by QueenKatelynTheAristocrat

"It all started when Henry and Alex were guest judges on RuPaul’s Drag Race..." Also known as: a queen on Drag Race made a joke about how Alex Claremont-Diaz is clearly an exclusive top, and now the internet can't stop talking about it, and Alex can't stop thinking about it, and maybe he kind of feels like he has something to prove. In which, Alex bottoms for the first time. And the entire thing is a beautiful emotional roller-coaster, just like we'd expect from these two.

wondering if there's anything to say at all by dearestalez

It was Alex, and not a motorcycle that had managed to grow opposable thumbs and open their front door. He was untying the laces of his shoes while David snuffled up against him, eager for pats. It was noticeable and honestly quite concerning when Alex pointedly didn’t pet him and instead tiredly pushed him away.

Body Count Baby! by orestespdf

“Okay,” Henry says eventually. “What do you want to know?” Alex raises an eyebrow. A small smile plays on his lips. “Can I ask you anything?” “Within reason, you hellion.” Alex flops back down and grins, a new vigor running through him. He rubs his hands together, clearly thinking hard. When he finally looks back at Henry, his smile has turned mischievous. “Am I the best you’ve ever had? Like, has anyone been better than me?” ----- Henry and Alex talk about how many people they've been with.

shake the glitter off your clothes by demigodbeautiies

It was meant to be a short thing, a fun trip, tacked onto the end of a frankly dull conference in Nevada. But getting drunk in Vegas has the potential to go very, very wrong, in some pretty unexpected ways.

Seven Years by LolaLand (Lola_di_Penates)

Seven different places, seven different timelines, seven different meetings, seven different Decembers. And still, Alex and Henry find each other in every universe.

my heart in a house (half a planet away) by annesbonny

“I miss you.” It’s the first thing Alex says when Henry answers the phone. He gets a soft huff of laughter in response. He can picture the quirk of his perfect brow, in the dim light of his Kensington bedroom. Alex wants to be there to straighten it out with his thumb, and kiss the growing concern away. 5 times Alex misses Henry, and 1 time he realises he doesn't have to miss him anymore.

All the Old Showstoppers by chamel

“Dunno, kinda looks like you know what you’re doing. Are those macarons?” Alex asks incredulously after a little while, and a moment later Henry sees him start slowly approaching out of the corner of his eye. “I didn’t know princes could bake.” “I’d wager not many of them can,” Henry replies as he works, letting one corner of his mouth tug upward. (In a universe where Alex didn’t go to the royal wedding, three years later Alex and Henry find themselves both competing on an episode of The Great Celebrity Bake Off. Will old hostilities lead to disaster, or is there something else causing all that tension in the tent?)

One Number Away by smc_27

“Hello?” a confused sounding voice on the other end of the line says. It is not Pez. Pez doesn’t answer like that. With the fanfare of “my dearest Hazza” or “my sweet prince” or “you absolutely unforgivable scoundrel.” Only the first of these has any root in truth or accuracy. Also, Pez is not American. “I’m sorry. You’re not…Not Pez. Right. I’m sorry.” OR: Henry dials a wrong number. Alex answers.

Screw Your Courage to the Sticking Place (and forget macbeth is a fucking tragedy) by Celaestis

"You don't owe me anything." "Of course I do. If you have time now...there are things I'd like to say." Alex hesitates. "I know I don't have any right to ask you to listen," Henry adds. He sounds so hopeful though. A little closure doesn't sound like a terrible thing. Agreeing to go with Henry, alone, to Kensington Palace sounds like returning to the scene of a crime. It's been over a decade since their breakup - Alex is now a single dad forging his career as a lawyer, and Henry's finally getting the courage to stand up to his grandmother. In finding themselves, can they also find their way back to each other?

A Goddamn Fairytale by toffrox

Henry wants to be angry. He does. He wants to feel it simmering in his chest, wants to be sitting there like Alex is next to him with his eyes smouldering. He wants to be like Bea, pacing the room with her fists clenched, absolutely livid.  "You can't let her do this!" Bea cries. "It's just one tiny part of the day," Henry says with a sigh. "Everything else will be exactly as planned. I'm just not sure it's worth having a big fight over." Bea glares and looks like she's going to rant when Alex cuts in- "Fuck. That." - The Queen makes some uninvited changes to the upcoming Royal Wedding plans, but Alex is determined to give Henry the fairytale wedding he deserves.

the key that unlocked me by railmedaddy

Something sharp presses against his collarbone – the key that Alex wears around his neck – before he rolls his hips and Henry moans. Alex lifts his head and grins. “You like that, sweetheart?” he asks knowingly, rolling his hips again. He’s got his arms braced on either side of Henry’s head, looking down at Henry with dark, sparkling eyes and his mouth curved into a lopsided smile before raking his lower lip through his teeth. Alex’s curls have fallen forward into his face and at this angle, so close, he’s devastating. Instead of answering him, Henry tugs at the chain around Alex’s neck with one hand, pulling him down for a kiss. He gives in, sliding one hand into Henry’s hair as he kisses him deeply, letting Henry take what he needs. or, Berlin, from Henry’s POV

go the distance by indomitablelove

His legs are like jello. He’s not entirely sure how he’s still upright. He’s running on fumes and the energy gel he’d been handed about forty minutes ago by one of the secret service as he’d passed by. Fumes, energy gel pouches, the roar of the crowd against New York streets, and pure adrenaline because he can see the finish line. He knows what’s there: June and Nora and Henry. Henry. The reason Alex is doing this whole damn thing in the first place. --- Alex decides to run a marathon. It's all Henry's fault, really.

making the headlines by stardisnight (athousandrooms), villageidiot

For no other reason than sheer boredom, Alex decides to set up a Google alert for the exact phrase "HRH Prince Henry." When Henry asks why, he quite literally cannot come up with a reason for the decision. He just… wants to. Also: five times Alex overreacted to a Google alert (and one time Henry did)

Captious (calculated to confuse, entrap or entangle in argument by lucky (revolutionbarbie)

“I’m so sorry I’m late.” Alex hadn't intended to be 45-minutes late to his blind date, he really hadn't. Thankfully Henry - broad-shouldered, blond, British and downright beautiful - didn't seem to mind.

and you would be there too by smc_27

It’s mostly dark out here, just the lamp poles in the parking lot casting a warm yellow glow across the packed snow. “We’re closed.” Henry spins around, heart racing, and sees the beautiful man from the café and from earlier at the shops. He cuts a stunning image, swinging one leg over the wooden fence rail and stepping into the parking lot as he pulls a red and black plaid shirt over his shoulders, his tan pants tight enough across his thighs to make Henry blush for noticing.

until next time!

[thewertsearch]

Asks Comp 5/6

Just like John Cusack, hoo hoo hoo is a universal constant.

I was so excited for her conversations :( And thank you very much! This comic's a slippery one, but that's part of the fun!

I do like the idea of pairing every Homestuck ship with a political ideology. It'd be the perfect storm of discourse, from about five directions at once!

Thank you! I don't think I'll even be in the country for my birthday this time around, so it'll be a quiet celebration.

I think it could still fit as a kismesissitude, even if they aren't all that unfriendly with each other. After all, Karkat's antagonism towards John is only skin-deep, and wears off fast.

FEFERI: There's no reason to be scared! They are not as terrible as they look. FEFERI: When Derse is destroyed, I am going to go to sleep and prove it. FEFERI: I will prove it to you, and to them as well. KARKAT: THEM? FEFERI: Our new friends! [...]

Oh, that does make more sense. Dang, I really liked the idea that the Horrorterrors were scared of Players.

Karkat made S-Tier for a reason. He's on fire this Act, and it's been great to watch!

You don't even get to examine your surroundings!!

I'm even more glad now that I'm using Homestuck Collection. It's clear that I'd have missed a lot without it, and it's a sad state of affairs that the comic's official website seems to butcher it so badly. Definitely recommend checking out the Collection, if just to play the walkarounds yourself!

Underutilized aspects of the trolls: Feferi Edition! [...] I do have to say that, when I think about her, I don't generally remember the Horrorterror connection. But Gl'bgolyb is a Horrorterror, after all. Feferi may be legitimately bubbly and sweet, but of the two races she is meant to unite, it might just be the Horrors and Humans. She's an eldritch Disney princess. Remember that now. ~LOSS (19/5/23)

Does that make Gl'bgolyb her Fairy Elder Godmother?

Ugh, tell me about it. It looks normal when the post is in my drafts, but breaks when I publish it.

I could go back and fix each post manually, but I don't have the time or the patience. Maybe I'll write a script to do it when I release Wertsearch: The Director's Cut.

Thanks! I've had Cat send a transcript over, and I've been copying it for quotes. There was a risk of mild spoilers if I accidentally read ahead, but if it means I can stop quoting entire conversations manually, I'll happily take that chance.

Damn it! There goes my Sollux Was Swapped At Birth theory.

I like these ideas! It's fun to speculate about what our species 'thing' would be, since we don't have any alien species to compare ourselves to IRL.

The idea of NPCs as Player templates is awesome, too. That implies an absolutely wild session in Sburb's past, featuring the Sleuths, the Midnight Crew and the Exile squad as Players.

What would Sburb even look like without Carapacians? Would the chess match in Skaia still exist, just without sentient pieces? I kind of love this idea.

Yeah, it's always nice when a story's really kicked into gear.

Beginnings and endings are difficult, and I usually enjoy the middle of a story more than either. By my count, we're about one-third of the way through Homestuck, and it's definitely found itself.

Thanks! I have a couple of ideas about which of my ships will be supported by canon, and which won't - but we shall see what develops. The comic might surprise me!

Canon Equius design.

It's a big question, and I don't know if I can fully answer this one, given how much of Sburb is still shrouded in mystery.

That said, the first thing I'd change is how Players are assigned. Instead of creating people who have no choice but to participate, I'd look for volunteers in the planets I've seeded. If Players have to be born in the Veil, then those volunteers would have their timelines rewritten, retroactively turning them into meteor babies - but only after they've volunteered for the role.

Also - does a session have to destroy the planet it's seeded on? If it was me in charge, I'd redirect the Reckoning's portals somewhere else. Literally anywhere else, actually. As far as I can tell, the only reason they were pointed towards Earth in the first place was for thematic reasons. The Sallyverse has different themes.

Yep. No special reason why - I've just been pretty busy lately, especially on the weekends. They've also been rolling over onto Mondays more often, too.

I get to 'em when I get to 'em - but I always get to them in the end.

Ooh, that's a deep cut. Possibly coincidental, but I wouldn't be too sure - I wouldn't put anything past Hussie.

I've heard of Higurashi, but I know very little about it. It is my tenuous understanding that it's a murder mystery starring several wealthy families - or is that its sister story, Umineko?

I don't want to look them up, because I might actually check them out at some point, and it is apparently very important to go in unspoiled. Potential future liveblog material, indeed.

I've speculated that the Knight is a protector class - and maybe Knights also protect themselves, hiding behind a particular trait or emotion which serves as their 'shield'.

Puréed puppet, unfortunately.

Now that I've seen all the troll typing quirks, I'm pretty sure I've actually encountered some of these people in the wild! I've definitely seen Terezi's leetspeak, or something very similar, on an anime forum or two.

[itsahotminuteinbetween]

Chapter 8

GUESS WHO'S BACK WITH ANOTHER CHAPTER That's right, after being out of commission for a couple months, chapter 8 is FINALLY finished.

AND I HAVE SOME GOOD NEWS FOR THE PEOPLE WHO'VE BEEN ASKING FOR IT:

Where the Stars Don't Shine is finally posted on ao3! The new chapter is here!

I am so so so sorry about the wait, so I made it extra long just for you guys! As always, @itsberrydreemurstuff, @bibooby, @laegume and @andyssilly, welcome back to the slumber party, I saved yall some front row seats! (If anyone else wants to be tagged just lemme know and I'll put ya in the next one!) Anyways, hope yall enjoy this, and without further ado-

On with the show!

Word Count: 4,962

-------

All your excitement during your encounter with Sun vanishes when it becomes clear just what sort of day it’s going to be.

You had a bit of a mixed bag in attendance today. All your regulars, plus a couple new faces here and there. It started out okay, really.

And then one new kid in particular showed his hand and cemented his legacy as one of the most spoiled children you have ever had the dishonor of meeting.

You try not to dwell on it and just move on, but this kid…this kid is awful . Pushing other kids around, turning his nose up at snacks and eating off other kids’ plates, ripping the heads off toys…

(You really have to remember to bring your sewing kit next time.)

You know it’s not the kid’s fault for his behavior, more of the people who raised him, and you try not to hold it against him, you really do. By the looks of it, Sun is trying, too, but both of your patience is drawing thin.

You draw the line when he tears out a page of your books that one of the other boys was reading.

You remind yourself repeatedly that you are not allowed to punch a child. 

You do put him in time-out, though. And you can guess by this kid’s behavior that their parents are going to raise hell about it.

You discover some hours later that your assumption is completely correct when said parent comes in later to pick up their child and you confront them about the brat’s behavior, to which their response is an offended gasp and a rant about how awful your work ethic is and you’re not providing enough care this is why people like you are in jobs like this you’re lucky you’re even employed that makes the brick walls behind security desk that you have the strong urge to slam your head into all the more appealing. You stand there with a polite customer service smile and take it like the valued employee you are while trying to remember what temperature human flesh burns at before chastising yourself, until you’re thrown back into reality and catch the tail end of what she says. 

“-and are you even listening to me right now? Ugh, you’re even denser than the robot, at least it can do its job right. You’re supposed to be the competent worker and you’re being beaten by a walking junkyard pile-”

Yeah, nope, not this again.

You bristle at her words, gritting your teeth slightly and forcing your smile to maintain itself. If it looks slightly more manic than intended, that can’t be helped, but you had always been good at playing the part of someone weaker than you. “I’m so sorry you feel that way, ma’am. I’m sure you can leave a review regarding our services on our website if you’d like. However, Fazbear does not tolerate abuse and slander of any of its staff. Thanks for stopping by and have a Faz-er- iffic day!”

You slam the door in her face just as she opens her mouth (likely to respond with another offensive remark) and dust your hands off in satisfaction. It’s not the first time someone’s come to complain about you and your coworkers. In truth, the company probably couldn’t care less how the clients treated their workers and their ‘property’ as long as they got paid. Slander against you, you could understand; you signed a contract and sold your soul away. One of the agreements was to deal with annoying clients. But the other two? They had been built for this, any complaint against them was the fault of the company itself, and besides, you couldn’t see them as anything other than people since the moment you’d spoken to them. After all, a company probably wouldn’t leave a prerecorded message expressing immediate hostility towards its employees on their first day of work, now would it?

They had to have some level of sentience to make that decision.

You mark off the last child with a pleased grin. At least with the way she’d reacted you could guarantee that neither the harpy woman nor her little satan spawn son ever set foot in the Daycare ever again.

You do unfortunately still have to clean up the carnage left behind, though. You grab a broom and a dustpan, ready to sweep up the crumbled play-doh and ripped stuffing from earlier, back straightening with a sharp inhale when the lights cut off. Not terribly uncommon, but it still left you uneasy. Moon didn’t get to do his little song and dance during naptime because you were preoccupied punishing a rulebreaker, and you’re pretty sure he’s fixing to dish out his skewed idea of justice one way or another.

Lo and behold, the tell-tale click of a wire descending directly behind you gives away his intentions. 

“ Aww , thank you for defending our honor so nobly , little knight,” he croons mockingly. You don’t even have to turn in his direction to know he’s fanning his faceplate and fake swooning in a ‘my fair maiden’ pose. You say nothing, just sweeping stiffly under his suspended shadow and inspecting the floor. You’d have to bring out the vacuum for the carpet, plus a mop.

You miss his frown at your evident disinterest. 

“So brave, to come to our aid when we were utterly defenseless ,” he continues, picking a small bit of clay off your shoulder and flicking it aside. “But you know, you seemed to have forgotten what I told you earlier…”

He pauses, seemingly waiting for some response of probing to continue. If he is, he’ll be sorely disappointed. Though you’re usually the one after them for conversation, you’re in no mood for it after the day-no, the week, the whole damn month , really- you’ve had. You just want to go home, take a shower, and sleep for an eternity. 

His frown grows further in distaste, and he decides to grab your attention by gripping your shoulders tightly and lifting you a few inches off the ground. Your previously unfocused gaze now snaps to him, alert and on guard.

Wuh-oh.

That’s more like it.

“We do not need your help ,” he sneers, shaking you by the front of your shirt. You blink and gulp nervously, unsure as to where this is coming from. You feel the worst of your nausea as he starts to raise you towards the ceiling with you hanging onto his wrists tightly.

“Moon…” you speak warningly, a shot of nervousness streaking through you as the ground grows further away. His only response is a sadistic chuckle, and the delicately crafted facade over your sickness accumulating from over the past few weeks worsens exponentially. Your stomach lurches and you hazard a quick glance down. You’re hanging a good thirty feet above the ballpit and still steadily climbing, and judging by the glint in your captor’s eyes, you’re not going to like where this is headed.

It’s safe to panic now.

“Moon, stop it, that’s enough,” you tell him, voice wavering. After no response, you try again. “Moon, that’s enough, put me down.” Silence. “That’s enough , drop it!”

He stops for a second, grin falling a little before returning full force. “Well, if you insist ,” he laughs darkly. 

Your eyes widen and for a moment, nothing happens. Then he yanks your hands off him and lets go, watching you plummet to the ground with sinister glee.

Then, you’re falling.

You think you scream, you can’t tell. You crash into the ballpit right after, but it doesn’t cushion your fall. You hiss immediately on impact, clenching your fists and curling in on yourself. The plastic balls dig into your spine, sending waves of pain throughout your body. Your eyes are squeezed shut and you don’t dare open them lest you see that face looming over you. You do a quick check-over, wiggling your toes and bending your joints weakly. Somehow, nothing is broken, but you can’t tell over the searing pain in your side. You thought it was bad before, but that was nothing compared to now. The dull ache is burning, setting your nerves on fire with as much as a twitch. Your back is in a similar shape, as are your legs. 

You don’t know how long you stay like that before Moon’s shadow looms over you from the side of the pit. He makes some stab at you that you don’t really process over the ringing in your ears. Existing hasn’t taken such a toll on you before. His voice still carries into the white noise. You manage to get your mouth moving again and whisper, voice crackling, “Knock it off, Moon.”

Unsurprisingly, he doesn’t let up on his teasing, and you vaguely register his response. “Oh, poor little worker can’t take a tumble. Too weak to pick yourself back up again? Not that I see much of a difference. You’ve always got your head down, ballpit or that desk you laze at. Best to let the ‘bucket of bolts’ do the work, hm ?”

You say nothing, not finding the idea of lifting your head and entertaining his little act worth it in your state. You remain limp in the ballpit, knees hugged to your chest in fetal position.

You hear him step closer to you, and jerk slightly when blue digits dig into your shoulders to pull you up. A cry of pain erupts from you at the fingers embedding themselves in your shoulder blades. They retract quickly as if burned by a pot sitting too long on the stove, as if this was the first time they’ve ever felt such heat before. Your severe pain and slightly depressive state dissipates momentarily and is instead replaced with white-hot anger that threatens to bubble over.

You slap his hand away and shout, “It’s not funny, Moon, knock it off! ”

He freezes, hands twitching in the air. His optics flicker, narrowing as he reaches back out to capture you once out. You smack his wrist again and ignore the added pain of striking metal. 

You stagger out of the ballpit, standing on shaky legs. You don’t give him a chance to speak before you start up again. 

“What the hell is wrong with you, man? You dropped me from 50 feet up, I could’ve died ! What did I even do to you?”

His faceplate turns in a silent half-rotation before he shrugs.

Oh no he did not . 

You explode, gesturing wildly as his simple movement spurs you on. “So what, you just don’t like me and decided to fucking throw me off the balcony like some- some doll for you to mess around with?! Pfft, yeah sure, that makes sense! Let’s just drop someone from 40 feet ‘because we don’t like them’! Wow, Moon, I can see how you guys got your position with that logic !”

“Oh wait! ” you spin around sharply, a manic grin on your face that seems to twist every meek and modest feature on your face as you continue on. “That’s why I’m here! Because for all your hard work, Management still decided to shove me into this hellhole! And it doesn’t mean much, it’s Management, they don’t mean anything, but hey , guess what? I never wanted to be here, but surprise-surprise, no one wants to hire a nobody who didn’t push through their degree except a shady company with a world record in OSHA violations and an even bigger death toll! So here I am, getting paid 30 dollars an hour to deal with your ungrateful asses for five hours a day, not to mention the ridiculous amount of unpaid overtime of three to five EXTRA hours I dedicate to this sorry place, all without a single day off in the past six months that I have worked here, each of which have been filled with your non-stop harassment and shitty attitude, which for some bizarre reason I haven’t reported yet! So why, pray tell, have you been dead set on punishing me for a crime I have yet to commit? What did I even do to you?” 

It’s a trap. Moon knows it’s a trap, but he refuses to let you get away with such slander on his turf. He rolls his eyes and huffs, “ Oh, please , you aren’t nearly as victimized as you make yourself out to be. You slack off during playtime while Sun handles everything, you’re constantly snoozing away at your desk unless you oh-so graciously decide to grace us with a moment of your time, and sometimes you don’t even show up at all. I think we have much more of a right to type up a report than you ever will.”

Alright, that’s it- “Oh, really ? Alright, buster, don’t give me that shit, I know damn well what I’m worth. For the record, I do play with the kids - which, if I may remind you, is not in my job description- until sweet lil Sunny starts giving me a death stare for daring to intrude on his precious playtime. And I do pitch in around here, just as much if not MORE than you do! Guess what, cheesehead? I clean the ballpit. I order the food, I buy the supplies, bring the books, put the kids toys back together, organize a monthly schedule AND deal with your sorry asses,  so don’t be telling me how to do my job, got it ? And don’t start up about my breaks, cuz, huh , I wasn’t aware that a two minute break in the place of an hour’s worth of free time was against my contract! I take time off when I know I’m not needed so that I don’t keel over and leave you to deal with over 40 kids! And even with that, I’ve still never taken an actual sick day off the entire time I’ve worked here because I know this is how you’ll react! When was the last time I didn’t show up to work, huh?”

Moon is swift with his reply, almost anticipating the question. “Last month, you took nearly two weeks off without telling your supervisors,” he states triumphantly, as if this had somehow won him the argument.

Oh, this absolute idiot . 

His victorious grin falls slightly at your disbelieving laughter. “Two weeks?! I’ve been working here for six months and you’re hung up on two weeks ?! I’ll have you know that I did tell my supervisors-which you are not , by the way- that I would be out on unpaid sick leave. And I know they didn’t tell you about it because I knew exactly what would happen, and it did! I thought you could respect it and let it go , but apparently not, cuz  you can’t handle not sticking your obnoxiously pointed nose up someone’s business! And now I’m the nosy one!” Your voice grows louder, and you throw your arms out with a wide, dangerous gleam in your eyes. 

“You wanna know where I was? Why I was gone? Well guess what, Craterhead, I was in the hospital making sure my brother didn’t drop dead ! I had to make sure he didn’t flat line halfway through a surgery !”

Oh.

Oh no.

Moon’s eyes widen, regret flickering across his face for a second. He takes a small step back, retreating as you advance. A jab to the chest pulls him back to the present, and his optics narrow.

“But you don’t care about any of that, do you? All you care about is your stupid reputation and oh no, Sunny and Moony can’t have a human ruining everything, because that’s all this meatbag knows how to do! Oh no, poor Sunny and Moony!”

You watch his expression drop like a thermometer exposed to subzero temperatures, red optics pinpricks in a sea of black that threaten to overtake them, contracted pupils tensed like a rubber band about to snap. A spark of something, perhaps vindication, ignites within you, overshadowing the voice in the back of your mind that quietly warns you of what to come, to back down before it’s too late.

A pity your brother isn’t here to hold you back. 

Your voice drops dangerously low for a moment, a deathly whisper that somehow seeps fear into Moon’s systems more than your uncontrolled rage.“I bet you tried to break me, didn’t you, wanted to see me all battered and bruised with my tail tucked between my legs as I ran out of this godforsaken place. Oh, don’t act so surprised, we both knew you never liked me. You never liked me or the idea of someone coming along to jeopardize your position, your life’s purpose, the only thing you have ever been good for, and so you pushed, even when I went along with all your orders, all your demands and your stupid checkpoints and your stupid, stupid rules, pushed and pushed and pushed until I couldn’t take it anymore, and here we are. Well, no more ! You knew there was a breaking point, you both did. Well, here it is, the final straw! Your hard work finally paid off, you’ve made me even more miserable than before, and for what? Is this what you wanted, Moon, Sun? Are you finally satisfied? ”

Moon is still in front of you, hands drawn to his chest, pupils watching fat drops roll down your cheeks and leave stained rivers on your skin as you smile that angry, heartbreaking, defeated smile that cuts through their wires like glass shards, words stabbing through his central processors and sending a jolt through them both. He wants to respond, wants to say something clever and leave you sputtering and defeated, but nothing comes to mind. He always has a retort, a comeback, a witty remark or a snarky comment to make you bend to their will, and yet this time he’s the one left grasping for straws. He’s speechless, voicebox pushing out low static as he struggles to formulate a reply. You don’t give him the time to, resuming with a steady confidence they’ve never seen in you before. This is a side of you that is unfamiliar to them. They don’t quite know what to make of it, and so they stay unwillingly silent as you answer your own question with an air of finality. 

“No, you’re not. And I’ll tell you why. This perfection that you’ve tried so hard to pin down? Hate to break it to you, buddy, but perfect is something even machines can’t accomplish, no matter how advanced or well-built they think they are. It never will be. You and Sun both think you’re oh-so-great and so far above lil ol’ me and my stupid human brain, but I think you forget that you’re just as bad as I am. I’ve seen the daycare reviews, boys, and trust me, they are not pretty. Our sweet little ball of Sunshine scared kids so bad with his pushiness that a good deal of them just didn’t come back, and you? Oh, you scared the shit out of kids, didn’t you? You left them shivering in their sleeping bags in fear of the very thing that swore to protect them. 

“So tell me”- you tilt your head, smile growing sickeningly sweet as your eyes squint upwards, hands poised together as you punctuate every syllable that leaves your lips - “What exactly do you think gives you any authority over me? How do you think you can protect anyone from me when you can’t even protect them from yourself?”

You let the words hang in the air for a moment, the manic grin not leaving your face as you turn around to sweep over the daycare after the prolonged eye contact with burning red optics begins to sting your eyes. 

 “But hey!” you call out behind you with a laugh like shattered glass left on cold tile. “Don’t take my word for it. I’m just the dumb worker you had to boot cuz you didn’t want someone to steal the spotlight.”

You whip back around to give a final comment before catching a glimpse of Moon. His pupils are near non-existent, eyes dark and empty. His static grin is too wide, fingers too sharp, curling and uncurling. You freeze, words cutting to a halt, and you swear his grin grows wider.

“ R̶̻̘̃͂̈́͋́ ̶̢̛͇̠͔̤̥͉̜̖̫̰̬̬̝̓͛̾̅̓̑̌́͆̅̇̿̎͂̈́͘̕͠Ǘ̸̡̻͖̅̄̄̚ ̵͖̱͕̫̋̈́̀́͊̇̐̀̒̒̋͑̅̀͗̊́́̚̕͝N̵̘̰͓̹̖̘̦̪͂̓̎̅̊̀͘̕͜ ̶̡͕̙͖̟͍̼͙̠̺̹̦̘̙̘̠̏̾̿̏̂͜ͅ," he growls. 

It sends a chill up your spine, dousing your anger in fear. You don’t waste time waiting for him to start chasing. You’re already booking it across the Daycare and to the exit. 

You’re maybe 10 paces in when you hear him behind you, wire clicking and shooting him to the ceiling. You know it’s a losing battle, he could easily take you if he wanted to. He doesn’t though, not yet. It’s the chase he’s after.

You dare not turn to check behind you, instead running blindly in hopes of somehow managing to hide. Your logical reason tells you to just leave, but it’s drowned out by pure instinct to run, get away, danger-

Moon has a severe advantage and you both know it. He knows the area. Still, you foolishly blunder on, making a hard right that almost makes you trip before you stumble back up again. You’re lucky he doesn’t do this more often because man you are out of shape. He hasn’t chased you since the first two months, you’d thought these games were behind you.

You wheeze as you bump into a wall, barely managing to dodge a wet floor bot. You can’t keep this up much longer. Your heart’s been kicked into overdrive, beating at a rate you know isn’t normal. Distantly, pain tingles in your elbow, muffled by the adrenaline pulsing through you. You’re surprised you haven’t bumped into any of the GlamRocks. They may not like you, but it’s better than this. 

Maybe they’re patrolling different floors? They could be charging.

All at the same time.

Yeah…

You skid to a sudden stop. You were just here, weren’t you? Ugh, these hallways all looked the same. Your eyes dart around wildly, spotting the familiar Daycare entrance. The faces of golden statues are smiling down at you.

You can’t recall a time where that’s happened to you before. 

Your eyes dart around for some place to hide, landing on a closet. You hear jingling bells in the distance.

You silently pray there aren’t any spiders before shutting yourself inside, leaving the door open just a crack for a sliver of light. 

It’s not a terribly big closet. There’s maybe enough room for you to stand upright. You sit with your knees tucked under your chin, eyes never leaving the door. Just in time. The wire descends and detaches, two feet coming into view. They pad softly on the cold tile, making no noise as he prowls for his prey. 

A shadow in front of the door.

You hold your breath, freezing and throwing a hand over your mouth.

A pause.

His attention is shifted elsewhere. He grumbles and stalks off, leaving you in  the dark. 

You wait maybe thirty seconds for the footsteps to grow silent before exhaling softly and taking stock of your situation. You’re stuck in a broom closet at work and the only other worker here tonight just left. 

Not that Moon would be of any help , you thought bitterly. He just wants you out of the way.

You can’t really blame him for that , though, can you ?

The thought almost sets you off the edge, but you reign yourself in, letting go of a self-deprecating laugh and wiping the tears that form in the corners of your eyes. It doesn’t help. New ones replace them and you let your hands fall back into your lap.

No. No, you couldn’t blame them for it. You invaded their space and made a mess of things. You have a habit of doing that.

That’s why you left, after all. You couldn’t handle messing that up , either.

A shaky sob escapes you, and you press your palms to your eyes to stop the flow of tears trickling down your face. You need this job, you can’t lose it. If you lost it, you’d have no other options. You’d be out of house and home, and then what? Go back with your tail tucked between your legs?

No. You couldn’t go back.

What other choices did you have?

It didn’t matter, anyway. At the end of the day, nothing would change. You were still you, and something always goes wrong no matter what you do. Didn’t matter how hard you tried or how fair it was, it’s always the same.

Sometimes you wonder if everyone would’ve been better off had your brother been an only child.

A soft buzzing in your pocket snaps you out of your episode. You fish your phone out in surprise. That’s right, you’d put it there after this morning.  It vibrates in your hand, the caller ID flashing across the screen. It’s your mother. You stare at it dumbly, making no move to answer it. You’re half tempted to just let it ring till she gives up and drops it as always, but…

You need something to keep the quiet at bay right now.

Swiping to start the call, you hear shuffling over the static and put the speaker close to your ear. A short “hello?” is heard and repeated as she tries to figure out how to use the brick in her hand.

The act is familiar and you manage a watery smile. “Hi, mom.”

“Can you hear m-oh, good, you’re there. Your brother said you messaged him this morning and we just wanted to check in.” Her tone shifts. “You okay there?”

You don’t think you can pull off pretending that you’re fine at the moment. You sniffle into the receiver, curling further in on yourself. “I’m okay, I just…I just had a bad day at work.”

“Oh, sweetheart…”she sighs, and you wince slightly, not really feeling up to whatever questions she has to ask. “You wanna talk about it?”

You shake your head before remembering that you’re on the phone, instead muttering a quiet ‘no’ into the speaker. She stays uncharacteristically silent on the other side of the line, her subtle shifting of the phone the only indicator that she’s still on the call. You know she wants to pry further, force an answer out of you. Sometimes, you almost wish she did, wish she pushed just a bit harder so you could finally break and let it all out.

She doesn’t this time though, puttering out a soft sigh. “Well…alright. Just remember, we’re always here if you need us. Your brother’ll probably check on you anyway, you know how he gets. Just don’t let him burn the building down for your sake.”

A wet snort slips past you before you catch it, imagining your anarchist brother expressing his rage against the machine and corporate capitalism by burning down a rip-off Chuck-E-Cheese. You didn’t think your mother was capable of creating an image like that, either. She hadn’t exactly been very invested in either of your interests. You wonder if she’s been taking pointers from your brother. 

You wave the thoughts aside, realizing you’ve let the conversation taper off and…

You suppose you can let this phone call end on a higher note. You both sort of need it anyway.

“Thanks, mom,” you whisper coarsely, leaning against the stacked boxes and letting your head fall back.

“Of course, dear. You just call us back when you’re ready. Oh, and try to tag along with your brother sometime, it gets lonely without you there. You were much better at listening to his mechanical jargle than we are.”

You exchange a few more quiet answers before wishing her a good night and hanging up, squinting at your brightly lit phone in the dark space. The time reads a little past 10. Moon’s first round of patrols is likely finished, which means it’s finally safe to leave this cramped compartment. 

The door remains shut when you turn the knob.

You try for the handle again, rattling it with greater and greater intensity as your panic begins to build up to no avail. Your hands form fists, soon beginning to bang on the door, eyes wide and breathing erratic. Try as you might, it’s sealed like a tomb, effectively locked inside. 

No, no, no , this can’t be happening, not here, not now. You don’t want to be here, don’t want to be in this dark, cramped closet at the end of some forgotten corridor, stashed with all the boxes and cleaning supplies. 

Your brother had locked you into a closet once. Flipped the switch on the outside and left you alone to battle the demons you couldn’t see. It had been funny, back then, until you started screaming and begging to be let out.

It wasn’t funny now.

You drop to the floor, hands sliding down the wood to lay limply beside you. You can feel yourself shaking, bones rattling as you tremble. Your lungs burn with the force of the rapid inhale-exhale pattern you struggle to keep stable, your heartbeat pounding at the front of your head. Inhale, exhale, thump, thump, inhale, thump -oh, weren’t you supposed to exhale first- thump -and your heart’s not pumping, you can’t breathe, you need to breathe -

You gasp, head reeling, nails digging into your palms and leaving red marks. You struggle to ground yourself, forcing your eyes to focus on the sliver of light from under the doorframe. You inch back, still trembling lightly, staring blankly at the floor as the cold reality dawns on you.

You’re trapped.

No one is here to save you now.

Aaaaand that's a wrap! Hope yall enjoyed that lil chapter, seems like our y/n's gotten into quite a pickle! It's okay, though, they needed some time to process anyways. Speaking of which, Sun and Moon have a LOT to think about... Not sure when I'll post chapter 9, sorry! I have a couple of short snippets planned out already, but typing and connecting them is a whole other matter, so I dunno when I'll get back to this. Until then, however, I hope this is enough, and unfortunately...

The theater is closed...

[priestess-of-yuri]

Hi, Alice the Witch!!!! How are you? I hope life’s been good to you, if not I hope things get better. Wow, I just went to your website. It’s so calming and peaceful. Your post about healing really spoke to me. I like the pictures with the characters as well. Are they from a show? If so is that one of your favorites? If so I hope the show/characters bring you comfort❤️. May I have a reading on, “what do i need to know right now?”

About me: I’m not really that interesting. But, I’m a Capricorn. I say my favorite color is pink when I have to give an answer. But it makes me feel bad to the colors to pick, because they’re all beautiful and special in their own way. I feel bad for the colors that people don’t pick often. But I don’t like to be difficult when asked, so I just pick my childhood favorite color. I wish people didn’t have to experience pain, trauma or bad/hard times. (Sorry that’s all I can think of.)

Thank you so much for this opportunity 🙏🏿

hello there, lovely!!! 💕 i'm wonderful, thank you. life's been very good to me, but just like anyone else may have, i have experienced my fair share of challenges. the characters -- if you mean xiao and venti -- are from the game genshin impact! i don't actually play it anymore, but i'm spiritual fictionkin, so i believe venti is a past life of mine :) he's the character i have in my icon! the other character, xiao, is my twinflame queerplatonic partner's past life -- and so the ship is very important to me hehe. i'm so happy you find my site soothing! thank you so much for showing interest in me and my blog and site and practice, i really appreciate it so much!! 🦋✨🍃💕

your ask and vibes caught my attention, and i feel called to read for you. thank you so much for your patience while i navigate personal circumstances!!!!!! 🥺💗

for your tarot reading:

3 of Swords in reverse -- this is a card of heartbreak. are you perhaps not accepting a loss, maybe of a relationship or your own identity or a belief? when things feel dark and you're caught between wavering realities it's important to remember that you will always be yourself, and this too shall pass. you can find yourself again because you've been through suffering. you can choose to empower yourself by giving everything you've been through meaning. but for now, remember to tend to your soft heart. you deserve it. hold yourself dear. remember that this is an opportunity to heal, and you will love, thrive and find inspiration again soon.

The High Priestess in reverse -- this Major Arcana card provides your themes for the reading. are you afraid of your intuitive abilities? or are you simply not paying to your intuitive abilities? The High Priestess asks you to look within, to open your soul, heart and mind to all the messages coming to you from Spirit. there is a rich influx of messages constantly coming towards you, guiding you towards your best self and calling. you can listen to your gut feelings, intuition and emotions. they're always giving you so much information, and the more you open yourself to it, the more aligned you will become. the more colourful your life will become. the more vibrant every day will be. this is the path to understanding yourself, to healing, to growth.

King of Pentacles in reverse -- you can trust that you are already wildly successful. happiness from succes comes when you allow yourself the extravagance of desire, but with an underlying gratitude. are you feeling like you need to have more, but it will never be enough? do feel obsessed? do you feel like it's all just empty underneath it all? if so, this is because you're out of balance. you may need to balance out the material with the spiritual. seek to understand that neither is better than the other -- they are both part of the human experience, and deserve equitable, sustainable effort and devotion.

Knight of Swords -- this card represents you. you're a person of quick wit, skilled decision-making, intelligence, power to save the day, ambition, assertiveness, and profound success. trust that this is your core. if you don't feel that this resonates, perhaps it is your greatest potential. perhaps it is your trajectory. how can you barrel ahead in the one direction, all while being kind to others? you have every capacity to become the best version of yourself.

for your oracle reading:

Jump In -- the Andromedan Starseeds are believed to be beings that love change. they embrace it, swimming through the tides of life with vivacity and joy. you don't need to wait until you feel ready or stall right now. dive right on in, the waves of life are calling you! it might be rough for a while, but the rough seas are how you can learn to weather any ocean or storm.

Hiraeth -- this word, Hiraeth, is a welsh word that means something like homesickness and nostalgia for what cannot be returned to. Starseeds tend to feel this way about a planet, galaxy or star system they have memories of. sometimes they recall an interconnected oneness, of Source. when people feel this way they can search for "home" in community, people or places. if you resonate with this and don't really know where home is, remember that you likely chose to incarnate here on Earth. you chose to experience life as a human being. you're being called to fully embody your life here, and put both feet in. how can you choose to live in the here and now with your whole heart, body, mind and spirit? how can you accept things as they are, while striving to improve, while remaining grateful?

You Got The Love -- the Hadarians are beings of pure, divine, unconditional love. they struggle to have boundaried, interconnected, healthy relationships here on Earth because they're used to seeing the love in all people and situations. right now, you may be in a codependent relationship where you're losing your sense of self. if you are, take some time to do a relationship review and assess if you have made any unconscious or conscious energetic agreements. do you feel anxious or powerless, like you can't be yourself? are there any places of inadequacy you're using a relationship to cover up? take all this into consideration as you choose your next move.

Whale and Orca Elders -- the Whale and Orca Elders are benevolent cosmic beings who work to anchor a frequency of love onto the planet. they do more than any of us even know. they affect the Earth's magnetic field, and their harmonics call us to wake up and remember our own soul's song. looking into a whale's eye is something you'll never forget because they see past your woundings and walls and baggage to your soul. you are changed forever being seen that way. right now you are being called to let loose your potent soul song, just the same as these Elders. to see the soul of everyone around you and yourself, to leave your fears and doubts and baggage at the door. you're beautiful, and you deserve to be cherished for exactly who you are.

Water Your Garden -- Earth is a seasonal planet, and you are a seasonal being just the same. cyclical. you can't be running at full speed all the time, because if you do you'll break down. you need to remember that your garden needs to be watered. your body needs to be shown love and care. it's a whole new love language to learn your body's messages and signals, but it's so worth it to understand and relax and just slow down when you're running on low reserves. because when you do this, you'll make up for more time than if you pushed through the fatigue in the first place. regardless, that doesn't have to be the only reason. intrinsically, you deserve to treat your body well. it's the only one you have and it's so precious. it's another form of Universal love. treasure it. care for it. rest.

thank you so much for allowing me to read for you! i hope that this brightens your day, and serves you well. please remember to leave feedback when you can on my site. take care! 🦋✨🍃💕

[fatebinds]

hc +🌞🏆😃🧡💯 for any and all, or your choice!

thematic headcanons !

for max:

hc + 🌞 for a day-themed headcanon

he has, obviously, never been sun tanning in his life. that deadly laser truly fucks him up when he doesn't wear sunscreen... and lbr, this man doesn't bother to put it on. he just complains about shedding like a fucking lizard later on.

hc + 🏆 for a goal-themed headcanon

for the laziest, self-serving bastard in the world... he's pretty good at getting what he wants and doesn't care too much how it happens. if he has to act like a manbaby for it, he will. and frequently does.

hc + 😃 for a happiness-themed headcanon

there is nothing in the world that makes him happier than being waited on and complimented. even doing drugs and crazy rituals comes second! shows you how big his ego is. :/

hc + 🧡 for a friendship-themed headcanon

sorry to all of his 'friends' but they are almost exclusively just means to an end for him. he would shove them off a cliff in a heartbeat if it meant getting his way.

hc + 💯 for an achievement-themed headcanon

he's pretty proud for getting his music on spotify. yes, he was the one who put it there... but still.

for shari:

hc + 🌞 for a day-themed headcanon

shari does all her best sleeping during the day, mostly in the break room at work. night time is just so... scawy.

hc + 🏆 for a goal-themed headcanon

as a little kid, she really wanted to become a ballerina. probably for the best that she didn't, considering the pure damage of the sport! the one good thing to come out of her brother going missing.

hc + 😃 for a happiness-themed headcanon

french fries are the only thing that can cheer her up these days. not for long, but it's something.

hc + 🧡 for a friendship-themed headcanon

she really wants more friends but is convinced that nobody likes her and that she's a nuisance, so she constantly sabotages her relationships so that nobody has to continue to deal with her. franz kafka ass...

hc + 💯 for an achievement-themed headcanon

getting a job at the hospital, or like... at all, is probably the biggest thing she's accomplished in a long time.

for alan:

hc + 🌞 for a day-themed headcanon

when he was a little kid he used to stare at the sun. somehow, he didn't end up going blind. probably messed up something tho!

hc + 🏆 for a goal-themed headcanon

his biggest goal in life is to move out of antioch and make a new life for himself away from his family.

hc + 😃 for a happiness-themed headcanon

he's never happier than when he's working on a project. call him a white dad the way he wants to build a fucking deck.

hc + 🧡 for a friendship-themed headcanon

he is grateful for the ones he has and their patience, if you can call it that, for how little he actually knows about the world.

hc + 💯 for an achievement-themed headcanon

he's very proud of his art :) but also really insecure, don't look at it.

for leon:

hc + 🌞 for a day-themed headcanon

chronic insomnia (he gets nightmares) frequently has him getting out of bed with the sun. good thing his job starts early!

hc + 🏆 for a goal-themed headcanon

at one point, he really wanted to get released from being institutionalized so that he could live his life. now that he's out... it's not what he expected.

hc + 😃 for a happiness-themed headcanon

he truly does not remember what true happiness feels like.

hc + 🧡 for a friendship-themed headcanon

he used to have quite a few pen pals from those write to a criminal websites, but hasn't kept up with them in several years.

hc + 💯 for an achievement-themed headcanon

i don't think this man has a single real achievement. i mean, he won a spelling bee when he was seven. that's about it.

for kalypso:

hc + 🌞 for a day-themed headcanon

she has the sigma grindset DOWN. daytime is for working. night time is... also for working, but sometimes the work is more fun.

hc + 🏆 for a goal-themed headcanon

her biggest goal used to be to move to new york and open her own firm, once she had the proper experience. she even wanted to go back to school, if a more prestigious one, to continue her studies.

hc + 😃 for a happiness-themed headcanon

truthfully, she's happier now in antioch than she was pre-crash. maybe it's just a sense of belonging she was missing. <3

hc + 🧡 for a friendship-themed headcanon

in high school, she never really had a lot of real friends and mostly just swirled around between different "popular" groups because of her parents and their money.

hc + 💯 for an achievement-themed headcanon

the life she's built post-crash is pretty impressive, even if it's not as impressive as surviving in the wilderness for all that time.

[katielovably]

I think I know what type of partner I want to find. I know it's impossible. But it's good to think about

I am watching Celenaspookyboo and she's has the personality who would be amazing personality and spirit. So I would like to find someone whose adventurious, down to earth, humble, funny (like dad jokes and jokes that's humble not jokes that hurt or insult anyone), understanding because I need someone who is patience and slow you know. So many people want to jump into things like where people go to babe or sweetheart no let me decide thing, you know. I want someone who can be my friend, help me when I panic or nervous because when someone asks a question I need someone who helps explain. I need someone who wants to snuggle or lay together. Walk together threw the bush or just wherever (pretty sure I talked about that one before), someone who allows me to have emotions instead of burying them. Someone I can be myself around. Who wouldn't put me down, who would make me cowar or nervous to be around.

I know a person like this is impossible to find (when I actually go searching because I spend a lot of time at home) but it's hard for me to know where to find people because people just showed up in my life to be my friends (who turned out to be not good people) but I changed. I want to change but don't know how. I know getting a partner would help with that but it's a start. If not a partner then a career change and I'm scooping up Bean and moving because some is changing. I change feel it coming. My brain is trying to figure out how life will work for me and working at a zoo is one of them because I'm good at (not great because I'm anxious of something going wrong) but I can do it or a museum because I like history (also both places have gift shops it would be cool) even a curcus or something like that.

I thought in high school that I would stay in the area. After graduating and trying to figure out what I'm doing with my life which I would enjoy the working with people but people in the area are ignorant, selfish, fake and just not good people. I'm seeing this in family as well and I just want to move but the location isn't clear because I would tell people I want to move. Right away, where? Where would you go? Bitch I don't know. I just want to go I'm going crazy but don't know where to go if that makes sense. I spent five years in a place my dad owns and pays for (there a mouse problem and sewer issues every year). My dad offered to move it to my aunts and uncle ( who lives closer to town) but my brother (who I live with) is like they'll snoop or not give us privacy. I know this is the place this trailer belongs. The house doesn't move we do sorta thing. Getting Bean was the first step because something was telling me get a pet. I was looking on a local shelter website, I was looking up info on every dog breed I hear about in YouTube videos (those like shorts talking about dogs or even Brutus and Pixie had this dog in it that it smaller than a German shepherd but looked like it) like it was driving me crazy then my brain was like hey remember that site nana found her cat (it's like Facebook Market place). I went there was looking threw these articles (it was late at that point I my mind just left and I think I was jumping between two because info blurred and mixed. When my brain returned I saw a phone number and so that was the deciding factor on rather or not I was getting the kitten that became Bean or not. So I asked "hey, do you still have the cat?" Like expecting like a "no, I already got rid of it. Sorry." because it's a free cat so I figured you know people would eat that shit up. But nope she was still there. I'm like oh my god I'm actually doing this. But I was like planning on going solo but I told my brother who after making me swear I will be taking care of it (du, it's my cat of course I will) he decided to help me (because he made a deal on a computer so only fair (if driving three or so hours were called fair) and we got lost and confused by the directions and Bean's old owner was like trying to help us (it's funny to think back on) but now I got Bean and it's the best thing (expensive little free cat due to vet bills and shit like that) but she's happy and makes me happy.

But yeah, I'm just trying to figure out life because life sure wasn't nice to me in the past but that's how it goes. 🤷. I would like a partner because I'm lonely and want to kiss someone who is a cat and would be happy living with me to help pay rent with me (because Jesus knows it's hard to survive alone... as Bean has gotten a job yet lol) I hope to ditch this place in a year or so because honestly I have nothing here, I thought in 2019 earlier 2020 there was but I'm starting to see there's nothing it's an old person/ family town that's it. That's the people they cater to her and don't care about people my age listening to them because we're young and dumb it's not like we would know how to change things to better things or anything.

Sorry I'll stop now

I don't know why I always do this. I guess it's just easier to get your thoughts out.

[denial-permanente]

I wonder what it was like for you initially, in the early days. Many of us are just beginners, trying to get our partners to join in.

I feel so much more patient, gentle, and tender towards my wife as we begin this. I want to convey these feelings.

Do you have any insights as to what in took for you to really grasp the reigns in your relationship. I want my partner to know its ok, but its hard to express or explain, when its so new to them.

What a great question!

First, try not to push all those other fantasies you have on her. Let her take one thing at a time to get used to how things work. Do not turn it into "if you lock me up then I'll do the laundry" or anything like that. You can tell that men write those websites. 🙄

Thank her often for "indulging" you. Even if she comes to enjoy it as much as you do, never let her forget that you appreciate the time and patience she put in.

If she wants to take it in a different direction than you fantasized about, just let her. You may discover that her participation is better than your fantasy. For example, you may have imagined more teasing or weekly unlockings. She may experiment a bit then find she likes to use random unlocks or whatever. Make an effort to appreciate and enjoy what she does.

Talk to her about how what she is doing makes you feel. Don't just say "That made me so horny!" Trust me, she knows that. Tell her if something surprised you, or if you were impressed that she kept you locked for a month, or how keeping you locked on your anniversary was a surprise and you didn't think she had it in her to be so in control. Women want to hear how you feel about things. When they can tell you're enjoying it, that builds confidence.

And talk to her about how these things make you feel outside of the bedroom, like over coffee or lunch. That way she will know you're serious and not talking from being horny. 😂

Tom showed me cages that he built and asked me to try it. Later on he bought one of those CB3000 (the clear plastic ones?) and just let me do my own thing. He never complained (he still doesn't 😉). After a few years i was pretty confident, but my job took me to another country for a month. I locked him before I left and just thinking about him halfway around the world under my control just made things "click" for me. When I got back I kept him locked for another 5 or 6 months. I can't explain it, I just knew how I wanted things to be from then on.

Your wife may not turn into your dream keyholder. She may not even take to it completely. Just remember that it's okay... have patience, let her get comfortable on her own, and maybe then ask to I troduce things to make it more interesting for the both of you.

[amaya-chwan]

Takeaways from Therapy Game: Restart Chapter 13 (and some Therapy Game news!)

Hello everyone! I hope you've all been well these past two months and taken care of yourselves! 💜

Before we get into our takeaways for chapter 13, I saw some news from Hinohara-sensei's Official Twitter that I would like to share with you all!

First piece of news: Therapy Game re:start volume 2 will be released on 1st June 2021! 🎉

Second: in conjunction with the release of the second volume, Sensei will have an in-person fan signing event at the Ikebukuro Animate store (animate honten) AND will have a special limited time shop featuring goods of our favourite dorks! This shop will be opened 6th-20th June! 🎉🎉

Image from Sensei's Official Twitter post! ❤️💛💜❤️

Now, what does the second piece of news mean for us not living in Japan (such as myself)? 🤔 Well, one of two things could happen:

We could see the merch on Sensei's Twitter and wish we could buy them one day 😭 OR

Animate could "potentially" release this merch for online order!

I'm not trying to get anyone's hopes up, but when I saw Animate open a special Yuri!!! on Ice shop last year, I didn't think they'd release merch online. But they did, for a very, very short period of time only! So my only hope is that they do that again for Hinohara-sensei! 🤞

Here's the special website from Sensei's twitter that has information about the fan signing event and limited time shop! It seems they'll show what merch will be available in the shop when it's all been finalised.

If I spot anymore updates about that, I'll try to post about it here! ❤️💛

Alright, down to business as usual! Let's get into our takeaways~ Thank you for being so patient with me! Life has been a little busy this year with juggling work and social life! So I really appreciate your patience! 💜

Here are our takeaways for this chapter:

Loving the brotherly love we see in this chapter! Warms my heart to no end! ❤️💛💜❤️

Minato, bb, you are growing up a lot! I am proud of you! 😭

Did I ever tell you guys that I really love Mito-san too? No? Well now I have ahah! He is just amazing and I love the energy he has--cool and lovable, yet smooth and sexy! Loving the domestic vibes I'm getting! 😍😍

AHHH SHIZUMA! Your smile is too pure, it's blinding! 🥰

Just couple goals from Shizuma and Minato, AND from Mito-san and Shouhei! (Why I don't call Mito-san Itsuki, I'll never know ahah I blame Shouhei! XDDD) ❤️💛💜❤️

The younger sibling moments in this chapter are so relatable! (I am that younger sibling ahahah!) 🤣🤣🤣

I honestly don't know what to think of Onodera at this point in time? 🤔

The (supposed) date time with Shizuma and Minato went from adorable anticipation to steamy relations in a split second, but not NSFW! 😲

And that’s it for this chapter’s takeaways! For a more detailed breakdown/summary of this chapter, please continue after the cut! Since it's been a while since the last chapter, I threw in some extra surprises in this summary, so keep reading if you want to see~  😉✨

Our chapter begins with an image of Mito-san and Minato, with Minato's cheek leaning on Mito-san's shoulder. The dialogue reads: When it seems like my overflowing emotions are about to burst from the seams, I really do yearn for this back (i.e. something familiar he can always lean on).

We see Minato spaced out on a sofa, being called by Itsuki. Itsuki tells Minato to go home if he's just going to sit there like that since he is very busy cleaning his entire home for when Shouhei moves in with him! Minato gets up, understands the situation, and helps Itsuki out.

Itsuki, knowing something has happened between Shizuma and Minato, asks Minato directly since he only goes to Itsuki's place when he is troubled, and he must be troubled by something related to Shizuma. He also says that Shizuma is worried about Minato, especially since Itsuki lied to him about Minato's whereabouts.

Minato brushes it off, saying that it's nothing big. He talks about the time when they had to drop by Shizuma's workplace, he saw a woman/Onodera (not knowing she's Shizuma's director) and that Shizuma made an very adorable face while talking to her.

Minato stops talking, so Itsuki asks if that is all to the story. Minato then says yes, so Itsuki deduces that Minato is ignoring Shizuma because he happily spoke with that woman (Onodera) and confirms with Minato, who then agrees. Itsuki blames himself for raising Minato like this and apologises to Shizuma in his inner monologue.

Minato defensively says he's told Shizuma not to do that, yet he still does. Minato's monologue says that this Shizuma--who is talking to someone unknown to him, about a story he doesn't know, in a place he doesn't know about--seems like a distant person to him.

He realises that even though he and Shizuma are together, he cannot monopolise him, and that it annoys him. So rather than tell him not to speak with others, he has chosen not to see Shizuma until he calms down. Suddenly, a handyman appears at Itsuki's home to beginning furniture installations.

Image translated from Sensei’s Twitter post here!

Minato is surprised Itsuki replaced a lot of his furniture, to which Itsuki replies: "I wonder if Shouhei-kun prefers the new ones too."  Minato says Shouhei would freeze from this "surprise" and imagines Shouhei asking how much it cost!

Itsuki, still in his happy bubble, says he wants Shouhei to also select some household furniture and accessories, so they'll go shopping together next time. Minato is happy for them since their house-moving plans are going well. Itsuki goes back to their previous topic of conversation, and says how Shizuma and Shouhei both are very charming. He recounts how Shouhei would handle different kinds of customers, from the difficult to the sad ones, how his charms and personable skills would change their mood completely, and calls him a genius who has a knack for calming customers.

Minato asks if Itsuki dislikes that, since he himself doesn't know what to think of Shizuma showing his charm and friendliness to others and that some misunderstandings would arise eventually.

Itsuki then reminds Minato that out of all the people in the world, Shizuma asked Minato to live with him, and that thought alone must've made him happy.

Minato does agree, yet it doesn't change the fact that he is unaware of what Shizuma does outside of the home. Itsuki is then suspicious that Minato and Shizuma are going to move in together too.

Minato panics, and says he just meant that from Itsuki's point of view since he's moving in with Shouhei. Just as Minato thinks he's almost let the secret slip, he gets a phone call. Itsuki tells Minato that it's Shizuma, but Minato refuses to pick it up as he is "still cleaning"--the real reason is that Minato told Shizuma he wouldn't forgive him if they speak before Minato gave the OK to talk again.

Itsuki, being the older brother, answers the phone and slides it on the desk near Minato and leaves him to talk with Shizuma, even putting it on loud speaker since Minato is preoccupied.

Shizuma is frantically trying to get a response from Minato, to which Minato responds with a simple: “What... I can hear you.” The first thing Shizuma asks is where Minato is at this present moment, fearing that he might be at a suspicious place. Minato says he isn't and is in fact in the neighbourhood doing some errands. Shizuma breathes a sigh of relief and is thankful his call finally reached Minato as no one he asked knew where Minato was, and because Shizuma was overthinking things, he was just about to go searching for him.

Minato tells him that he doesn't need to go to such lengths and make such a big fuss about it, but Shizuma tells him that he will always make a big fuss about it since it's about Minato. To avoid such a thing happening again, Shizuma tells Minato not to make him worry. Then these pages happen:

Just as their talk of their brothers' moving into together comes to an end, Shizuma gets all excited to go apartment hunting with Minato again and reminds him, not knowing that Itsuki is also listening. The Mito brothers freeze in surprise, with Itsuki soon confirming his earlier suspicions with Minato--his eyes and aura going all kira kira (i.e. sparkly). Minato tries to reprimand him for bringing it up now, but Shizuma continues on, saying he's found a few places he likes and they should start inspecting prospective apartments soon before they're overwhelmed by it all.

Minato hastily agrees to it all, and Shizuma smirks on the other end of the phone, asking Minato when they can see each other. Shizuma suggests Friday if he is too busy at the present moment, and just as Minato gives work as an excuse not to see him on that day, Itsuki jumps in and says he can go see Shizuma.

Shizuma, very surprised by the fact Itsuki overheard their conversation, says his name aloud, and Shouhei overhears him. Itsuki thanks Shizuma for letting him overhear such an adorable story featuring Shouhei. And then this happens:

Still very flustered, Minato quickly agrees to seeing Shizuma on Friday and promptly ends the call before Shizuma can even finish saying "Wait!" Itsuki happily approaches Minato and asks to hear more of their apartment hunting adventures, to which Minato replies that nothing is final yet!

We change locations, and Minato is now on the balcony scrubbing the floor. Minato recalls how he wanted to tell Itsuki about his and Shizuma's plans to move in together further down the track. He then is overjoyed at the thought that Shizuma missed him and wanted to see him. While he awaits Friday, he remembers and is embarrassed by how furious he was the last time they saw each other. He plans to start a skin routine to care for his face and to get his hair done.

Just as he thinks this, he is called out by none other than Shizuma, who is on the ground floor outside. Minato, visibly surprised, asks Shizuma why he’s here. Shizuma tells him that the shop is close to his home. Minato knows this, but is more curious as to why he is here since they just agreed to see each other on Friday. Shizuma is taken aback for a moment, before saying: 

While Minato hides away from Shizuma and quickly tries to style his hair, Itsuki overhears a ruckus on his balcony and goes to investigate. We then find out that Shouhei accompanied Shizuma. Shouhei calls out to Itsuki and asks why he didn't tell him that he was cleaning the whole house. The Ikushima brothers offer to help out with the cleaning, with Shizuma joining in because his younger brother will be under Itsuki's care soon. Itsuki happily agrees, saying that he wouldn't be able to fully clean the place if only Minato were there.

As the Ikushima brothers are getting ready to go upstairs to help, Itsuki says the brothers are indeed good, endearing people, and their charming personalities would probably make Minato and Itsuki anxious at times. Minato agrees. Itsuki then continues to say that while Shizuma and Shouhei charm those around them, the only ones who can make them smile the way they do are themselves. Minato is concerned about a possible intruder in their relationship, and Itsuki provides some brotherly advice.

We change scenes to Onodera, smoking on the clinic rooftop and thinking about Shizuma's smiling face.

We change scenes again to Minato, waiting for Shizuma at a predetermined location since it is now Friday. Happy with his new hairdo, Minato reminds himself not to get angry, to sort out the current situation they're in (i.e. Minato's one-sided anger at Shizuma), and to be calm and collected.

Shizuma then gets out of a car across the road, and looks around for Minato. Minato, who can see him very clearly, smiles happily and decides to let Shizuma look for him a little longer. A few more moments pass by, and Shizuma spots Minato and then waves happily to him. However, there is a slight problem.

Minato sees “the woman from last time” (Onodera) driving the car who then passes Shizuma his phone, with him smiling awkwardly at her. He recalls Itsuki's brotherly advice. Minato had actually asked Itsuki a follow-up question: "You say ‘just don't lose,’ but what should I actually do?" Itsuki tells him that it's something he has to figure out for himself.

Shizuma runs to Minato, apologising for making Minato wait. He explains that he was running late due to various issues, and he seemed to have dropped his phone in the car of the person who dropped him off. Before he could even tell Minato that it's his director who dropped him off, Minato says he doesn't need to say anything else and to just go out with him.

We see that Shizuma and Minato are now at a hotel, with Minato quickly pushing Shizuma onto the bed. Shizuma is annoyed at himself for letting Minato see such a scene that would cause a misunderstanding. Before heading over to the bed, Minato closes the door, turns to face Shizuma, and grins. He crawls onto the bed and immediately kisses Shizuma. He calls out Shizuma's name before asking him:

He softly pleads with Shizuma, asking for a quick response. Shizuma wonders if Minato's jealously is making him want to be held right now. He thinks Minato is really, really adorable, but also realises this isn't the right time to be thinking this. So Shizuma does tell Minato he loves him, that it's obvious he loves him very much. He apologises for causing him to worry and that he never once intended to do so. Minato cuts him off, saying that he understands and that it's okay.

Despite saying so, Shizuma notices the atmosphere is a little different than usual. Minato then tells Shizuma that he's been thinking of a way to ensure he doesn't lose Shizuma to anyone or lets anyone take him. The final page shows us this:

Again, THANK YOU FOR READING THIS FAR! 💜 📢  As always, please support Hinohara-sensei by purchasing her books and CDs! 📢

And that’s it for this chapter! 😲 Another cliffhanger here, and ngl that was a little (SFW-ish) steamy? I honestly do not know what to expect in the next chapter!! Dominant Minato?????  But I hope you enjoyed the few extra panels in this summary! 💜 My laptop struggled to keep up, so I will go back to only showing a handful of panels in future summaries. Please also refrain from resharing these translations and images outside of this post! Thank you for understanding! ❤️💛

The next chapter will be in next month's Dear+, so the wait isn't too much longer! So I shall see you all next month for our next set of takeaways to find out what happens next!

As always, stay safe during these turbulent times and look out for each other and for your loved ones! 💜❤️💛

[thekavseklabs]

So

As many of you know, I am the host of a DDNOS system. Today has been... Eventful, and upsetting. Some of you have seen what might have appeared to be erratic behavior from "me" today. That was actually several of our alters kicking in to protect me from what was happening.

I don't remember everything that's happened today. Looking at my tumblr activity, it seemed the more creative alters continued writing and interacting with people in my stead to avoid rousing suspicion and worries. I thank them for it.

If anything, anything at all has happened that I didn't see that made you uncomfortable, whether on tumblr or discord, please tell me so I can address the issue. I doubt anything did but they may have made a stray comment or two, I'm not sure. Normally we pass well but today was extreme.

My alters mean well, but some of them are awkward and don't understand websites like tumblr. Many thanks. If any of you wish to learn more about this or have questions, feel free to ask me and I will gladly answer, regardless of if you've been impacted by this or not. And if you're worried, I assure you, I will be okay. Eventually.

In the meantime, if you see any odd or unusual behavior or speech patterns, please feel free to ask exactly who you're talking to! We're all friendly- or at least benevolent- people, many of us are just shy. The person that hosted today especially has a reputation of impersonating me, but he will reveal himself if asked. His name is Comet.

I'm gonna be out for a bit. We'll see how i feel tomorrow. Activity will continue, but personal converstations will probably be wonky, even if many of us are enthusiastic. Thanks for your patience, have a nice time.

[nyxicnymph]

Guardians of Arcadia: Operation: Secret Santa

Christmas is quickly approaching in Arcadia. While the town may not get such luxuries like snow or ice-skating, the Guardians still want to participate in some form of Christmas tradition all together. Some might not know exactly what is happening, but they're giving it their best shot! (TOA CHRISTMAS SPECIAL WHEN?!)

Rating: ages 13 and up!

Warnings: Canon and character typical levels of teenage violence. Staja. Jlaire. No Zoe, sorry guys. Oh, and swearing.

Part five: Skin of stone, where'd that paper go?

Blinky cursed as he quickly flipped through yet another book. He couldn't remember who he had for Master Jim's little surprise gift exchange, and he's lost the paper in his pile of books. So was shuffling through the pile, his four arms and six eyes working overtime trying to find it.

He couldn't ask Aaarrrghhh for help, since he couldn't know who Blinky had for the exchange, but Blinky's patience was wearing thin. He needed an assist, and soon.

Gibberish floated up from below the table, and Blinky peered underneath to see Chompsky chattering to his strange doll obsession.

"Ah, Chompsky. Excellent timing. I need your help, since you are not participating in the 'Secret Santa'. I am missing a small piece of paper with a name on it. It's about yey big," Blinky demonstrated with his fingers.

Chompsky looked up at the troll for a minute, chattered briefly, and then scampered off. The gnome ran across the floor to the bookshelf, then ran up the bookshelf, stopping only at the highest shelf. Chompsky pulled out a book, and pulled a scrap of paper from between the pages.

"Heehoo!" Chompsky cooed at Blinky, waving the paper back and forth.

"Thank you, Chompsky! Please bring it here, I must read the name off of it."

Chompsky blew a raspberry, but jumped down and gave the paper to Blinky.

"Thank you, truly you are the most noble of gnomes." Blinky flipped the paper over and peered at it. "Ah! I am to be serving... Master Tobias?"

Blinky pondered this development. "What would Tobias enjoy as a gift?"

Blinky began to pace, shoving the paper into his pocket as he did so. "What does Tobias like? He enjoys trollhunting. He likes his hammer. He very much likes to eat." Blinky paused. "Perhaps I could get him something that he can make food with!"

Blinky grabbed the phone that Master Jim had given to him for quick contact, and navigated around. He had heard marvelous tales about something called "online shopping" on "Amazon". Blinky was fairly sure that the Amazon was a rainforest, but there was a website by that name.

Blinky clicked on it, and it asked for him to make an account. Blinky frowned, and called the only person he trusted to help him navigate.

"Hello, Blinkous, how may I help you?" Stricklander greeted as he entered the cave, ducking slightly to avoid hitting his head on the doorframe.

"How does one use this 'Amazon' website? I wish to get a gift from Tobias from here, as all the stores in the human world tend to close after dark, and I don't yet have an umbrella for shade." Blinky showed Stricklander the screen. "It keeps asking me to make an 'account'."

Stricklander sighed and produced his own phone. "What are you intending to get for young Tobias? I can bring the package down to Trollmarket when it arrives."

"Let me see," Blinky said, snatching the phone from Stricklander's hands. "Something that he can make food with, since he enjoys eating so much."

Something caught Blinky's eye. "Easy-Bake? That sounds simple enough for Tobias to handle." Blinky followed the steps to purchase the item (With Stricklander's credit card), then handed the phone back to the changeling. "Thank you, Walter. I'm sure Tobias will enjoy this 'Easy-Bake'."

A faint smile drifted across Walt's features. "Oh, of course. I can't wait to see his reaction to your lovely, well-thought out gift."

Stricklander left, and Blinky frowned. Something about that whole exchange seemed odd, but Stricklander was a changeling, so it made sense for him to be off-putting sometimes.

Blinky returned to his books, humming an old tune. Tobias would enjoy the gift, he was sure. Absently, he wondered who Tobias was giving a gift to.

[sepedarodatiga]

The Snow Queen fairytale as a motif used in GoT/ASOIAF

First of all, how many fairytales and myths can GRRM fit into this story, seriously?? I know many have written well thought and well informed meta of various fairytale motives fit with ASOIAF/GoT, and I am just here adding into an already huge pile, but it bothers me, okay. I have to get it out there into the tumblr void. And this is not really a well thought and well informed meta (I’m not a folklore/literature expert, not to mention European folklore/literature), I’m just pointing my fingers into the patterns I saw fit. Also, I can’t count myself as ASOIAF book reader, I just watch the show. What I know about the books, I read it here in tumblr. 

But anyway, you might be surprised as to which character I saw fit as The Snow Queen in GoT

It’s Daenerys Targaryen.

I know I know... whaat? The Mother of Dragons, Bride of Fire as The Snow Queen? Get out of here, right...

But it’s a pun. It’s not The Snow Queen, it’s Jon Snow’s Queen, get it? Remember how Jon repeatedly saying “you’re my queen” to Dany during season 8? Yeah. Oh and Jon is Kay, while Sansa is Gerda. 

What made me realize that Dany is The Snow Queen is when I was reading my son the fairytale. In the version retold by Kate Friend, it describes The Snow Queen as beautiful and terrible. And I was like, huh, just like Dany, especially with the white hair and the all white costume in season 8. 

Daenerys Targaryen, beautiful and terrible.

And then of course the story went on describing how Kay becomes her prisoner and then I was like, well that’s like Jon Snow during season 8 too.... And then in Disney’s adaptation Frozen, Elsa has white hair with purple eyeshadow, while Anna (Gerda) has....red hair....which is like... Sansa Stark. Then I also remember the illustration on my son’s book which is by John Patience, that reminded me of the Iron Throne.

The Snow Queen illustration by John Patience. See how much alike this setting is with the Red Keep? Especially in Dany’s vision in HoTU when snow was falling.

So I went investigating, and shit... I mean obviously the sequencing was moved around, GRRM likes to subvert things, but my God!

Before we get into Jon Snow and his queen, I have to start with the other characters first. And I will be taking excerpt of the story from The Hans Christian Andersen Center website which I assume would be the most original one.

Gerda = Sansa Stark

Here is a description of Gerda’s power:  “No power that I could give could be as great as that which she already has. Don't you see how men and beasts are compelled to serve her, and how far she has come in the wide world since she started out in her naked feet? We mustn't tell her about this power. Strength lies in her heart, because she is such a sweet, innocent child.”

Furthermore, her connection with Kay are through roses (they have a window box full of roses) and a song that goes like this:  "Where roses bloom so sweetly in the vale, There shall you find the Christ Child, without fail." Another variation of the song is: “The rose in the valley has flowers so sweet, and angels come down there the children to greet.” She saved Kay with her prayers, hugs, kisses, tears and her song and their reunion literally ended winter and brings spring. If that’s not Sansa Stark (and the jonsa reunion), then I don’t know what is.

Gerda made a journey to the North to find Kay and bring him back together with her to their home. Sansa did not meant to make a journey North to find Jon and bring him back home, but this is what happened anyway. The story even stressed on the fact that when they came back to their homes, they were no longer children but grown ups. On her quest Gerda offered her red shoes to the river to get information about Kay’s whereabouts but the red shoes were given back to her the first time. But she did it once again and the river set her on the path to find Kay. I’m not really sure but for Sansa it could be her betrothal to Joffrey that was then canceled but then she got married to Tyrion Lannister. Her red shoes is her name and her claim to the North.

Gerda then met an old woman who wanted to keep her and made her forget about Kay by keeping all the roses underground. The old woman’s place was beautiful. Here is an excerpt:  “Then Gerda was led into the flower garden. How fragrant and lovely it was! Every known flower of every season was there in full bloom. No picture book was ever so pretty and gay. Gerda jumped for joy, and played in the garden until the sun went down behind the tall cherry trees. Then she was tucked into a beautiful bed, under a red silk coverlet quilted with blue violets. There she slept, and there she dreamed as gloriously as any queen on her wedding day.” But then she saw a rose on the old woman’s hat and finally remembers her purpose of finding Kay. I would say that the old woman is Cersei Lannister who tried to make Sansa forget about her home and her innocence. Sansa was also saved from her clutch by roses (The Tyrells).

Then Gerda with information from a crow, met a Princess and Prince. She thought that the Prince might be Kay, but it turns out he was not. This might be Sansa’s vale arc and the Prince is either Petyr Baelish or Harry Hardyng. The Prince and Princess also gave provisions for Gerda’s journey to the North, so this may be that the KoTV helps Sansa getting Winterfell back. The crow, has a ladylove, another crow and they finally get married and live in the Princess’s castle though unfortunately the crow then died. The crow was a wild forest crow while his ladylove is a tame crow. These two crows could be genderbent into Sam Tarly and Gilly. Remember that Sam is mock as Jon’s ladylove by Alliser Thorne?

Next Gerda met a robber girl who sleeps with a knife and have plenty of pigeons. Yep, of course that is very much like Arya Stark (who sometimes is being referred to as “a girl”)

The pigeons told Gerda about Kay and The Snow Queen. The robber girl finally gave Gerda her reindeer called Bae for her journey to the North. The girl likes to tickle the reindeer’s neck with her knife. At the end of the story it is told that the robber girl then decided to leave her place and find adventure in the world. Very much like Arya’s ending.

Now about that reindeer Bae who helped Gerda to reach to Kay in The Snow Queen’s palace in the far North. In ASOIAF/GoT, we can connect Bae to Baelish. Make sense. Petyr Baelish helps Sansa get to North and Arya’s knife did end up in his neck. But also we can connect it to two foreshadowing of Sansa bearing Jon’s child. The first is more well-known: Bael the Bard. The second one I think is more hidden and I made a post about it quite long ago: Baelor. Is this far fetched? Maybe, but I’ll take it.

Kay = Jon (+ The Night King)

Kay and Gerda are neighbours and they share a garden (particularly a flower box full of roses). Their relationship, in the words of Hans Christian Andersen himself are: “These children were not brother and sister, but they loved each other just as much as if they had been.” So they are NOT brother and sister but love each other as such. While Jon and Sansa are also NOT brother and sister but was raised as such.

Then Kay got splinters of magic mirror stuck to his eyes and his heart. The mirror “made everything great and good that was reflected in it appear small and ugly, but which magnified all evil things until each blemish loomed large”. It made Kay hated all the roses, they look ugly now to his eyes and also made Kay loved the snow and the cold. Jon Snow at the beginning of the story was a cynical little boy because he was raised as a bastard. He wanted to leave Winterfell and sneered at the idea of having a family of his own because he felt that he can’t have them. So he went to the coldest place there is.

In the story, Kay plays with his sled, and then The Snow Queen came with her sled and Kay hooked his sled to hers. The Snow Queen first, covers Kay in a bearskin rug and gave Kay kisses. The first kiss “was colder than ice. He felt it right down to his heart, half of which was already an icy lump. He felt as if he were dying, but only for a moment. Then he felt quite comfortable, and no longer noticed the cold”. The second kiss makes Kay forgets about Gerda and their homes. The third kiss, The Snow Queen does not give him because it would be the kiss of death.

I argue that GRRM subvert this story. I think Jon Snow was already saved by Sansa before he met Dany. The splinters in his eyes and heart was already gone when he faced The Snow Queen. The reunion happened before he met Dany. The first two kisses also already happened: Jon Snow had died and came alive again, and he also forced to forget about his home and family while he was at the Night’s Watch. The bearskin rug which The Snow Queen used to cover Kay can allude to Jeor Mormont and/or Longclaw. 

Then Jon Snow met his queen finally, but instead of a hooking sleds.... it’s dragons. Jon Snow’s sled was his dragon Rhaegal which are hooked to Dany’s sled Drogon. But his eyes wasn’t blinded by the splinter and his heart were already warm. He knowingly and willingly follow the dragon to save his family.

And the third kiss of death that wasn’t given by The Snow Queen? Jon Snow will give it to his queen instead.

Now let’s go back a little bit. Kay was also given a puzzle from ice by The Snow Queen, and if he can solve it then he is free. He was supposed to spell the word “eternity” but he couldn’t figure it out with the shard in his eyes and heart. In GoT we know exactly who has got an shard in his heart.

The Night King. And so that is why he plays with puzzle in ice. He is struggling to form the one symbol that would set him free.

Bonuses

Other than those patterns, there are several interesting tidbits from the story that fits with ASOIAF. There is this one blog said that The Snow Queen story was inspired by another story called “East of the Sun and West of the Moon” which if you read it, it is essentially “The Bear and the Maiden Fair” (the bear is a white bear, by the way)

More bonuses here. When Gerda finally remembers to find Kay during her time in the old woman’s home because of the rose, different flowers gave her different stories even though none tells her about Kay.

This is the story from tiger lily:

"Do you hear the drum? Boom, boom! It was only two notes, always boom, boom! Hear the women wail. Hear the priests chant. The Hindoo woman in her long red robe stands on the funeral pyre. The flames rise around her and her dead husband, but the Hindoo woman is thinking of that living man in the crowd around them. She is thinking of him whose eyes are burning hotter than the flames-of him whose fiery glances have pierced her heart more deeply than these flames that soon will burn her body to ashes. Can the flame of the heart die in the flame of the funeral pyre?"

So GRRM didn’t take the sati ritual for Dany’s rites of passage as mother of dragons from just anywhere, but it is from this story.

Also, hear this story from hyacinth

"There were three sisters, quite transparent and very fair. One wore a red dress, the second wore a blue one, and the third went all in white. Hand in hand they danced in the clear moonlight, beside a calm lake. They were not elfin folk. They were human beings. The air was sweet, and the sisters disappeared into the forest. The fragrance of the air grew sweeter. Three coffins, in which lie the three sisters, glide out of the forest and across the lake. The fireflies hover about them like little flickering lights. Are the dancing sisters sleeping or are they dead? The fragrance of the flowers says they are dead, and the evening bell tolls for their funeral."

Of course this immediately bring to memory the quote of Jon Snow with Val: “The light of the half-moon turned Val’s honey-blond hair a pale silver and left her cheeks as white as snow. She took a deep breath. “The air tastes sweet.”” Well then, according to Hans Christian Andersen, that means death. There are three sisters here which could allude to the three queens at the almost end of GoT: Cersei Lannister (red), Sansa Stark (blue) and Daenerys Targaryen (white).

So those are my stab at it. I would be interested to hear if anyone’s take on it.

[vanthedork]

Hi! Sorry if this is a bit forward, but I absolutely adore your art style! I’m someone who wants to get in to character art but doesn’t have the education yet to back it up, I was wondering how you learnt to drawer or if you have any tips on good places to start, if you feel comfortable sharing?

Thanks and have a great day :)

Heyo! That's a very sweet thing of you to say, it made me happy to read! Well I don't have an art education either but I think you can definitely build something up if you're determined enough to work on it. There are a lot of art tutorials out there, but I'm someone who doesn't really have patience to sit through long videos to learn stuff. Instead I'm gonna give you a few tips of what worked for me: Observe everything around you. Everything you see can be an art lesson: shadows, lights, colors, shapes. Try to break objects and shapes down to geometrical forms: It's easier to understand how to draw an object when you stop focusing on the small details and focus on the overall shape. You'll start to see that everything is geometry.

Don't use too many colors for a design. You can use shades of a color, but it's generally more pleasing to the eye when you keep your color palette narrow. Of course you can experiment and see what works best for you. I found that keeping it to a few colors that harmonize helps. Don't add too many vibrant colors cause they usually end up clashing (unless you're drawing a parrot or something that demands a vibrant palette), instead use neutral tones too (like greys, browns, creams etc). Shade and highlight using colors, not greys. Your art will become more vibrant this way. Try shading with colors that neighbor the color you are shading (on the color wheel). I usually go with purples/blues for shading but reds/browns work too for warmer environments. View everything in a 3D space. When you break things down to shapes this becomes even easier. Remember that everything has a dimensionality and that will help you add the shadows better and avoid making your work look flat (sorry for the below floppy balls lmao I whipped 'em up with the mouse quickly for visual reference)

Study from photos. It's important to look at photos and break down the poses so you can understand them better. I know I said I don't have patience for videos, but I make an exception for Ethan Becker because he's just fun to listen to: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iLIjD-5AgWU&ab_channel=EthanBecker

Draw a lot. What helped me improve really fast is that I love creating comics and so I used to draw a lot of comic pages, which would force me to draw the same characters but vary the angles, poses, settings to make it more interesting. Drawing a lot is the way to go, but make sure you draw a lot of what you like, otherwise it becomes a chore. Study your favorite art styles. We tend to be self deprecating and look at other people's art and think "man I suck in comparison." Instead try to look at art you love and analyze it. Say you love the way the artist draws eyes. Figure out what is it that you like about it. Is it the shape? Coloring? That subtle little line they add here and there? Analyze and try to break down art as if it was a puzzle and figure out how you could emulate this and that. It will also broaden your repertoire of shapes to make characters look different from one another. Don't be afraid to use reference. The biggest artists out there do it. You can not accurately draw something from memory, we are not robots. Whoever says referencing is bad does not understand how art works. I like to use 3D models that I can rotate, as it helps me figure out the angle I want to draw the thing in. A good website for this is sketchfab.com . You can create and account for free and preview 3D models for free to use as reference. You can even find models that are in motion and that you can pause to get just what you need. Use yourself as a model. When I need a specific pose, I usually set my phone camera up and take a picture of myself doing that pose. Our bodies will move naturally and emulate an organic pose.

Similarly, you can use google earth/google maps to drop down and have city reference, for all those different looking buildings. I hope these tips can be of help to you and if you want me to talk about something specific don't be afraid to ask. I'll try to help as best as I can! :) Remember, no challenge is too big if you've got passion for what you do! I used to draw with a mouse for a few good years because I couldn't afford a tablet. You don't need fancy tools or expensive study materials as long as you are dedicated to your craft.

[themalhambird]

Top 5 paintings in the National Gallery?

In no particular order and I made it even harder on myself by including the National Portrait Gallery....anyway, this let me go and look at paintings, which was lovely, so thank you for this!

1) The Wilton Dyptich. No one is surprised. But it's so. goddamn. breathtaking...I'm so glad it's got it's own room now. See this tumblr post for my extended ramblings about it

See the link below to see the painting.

https://www.nationalgallery.org.uk/paintings/english-or-french-the-wilton-diptych

2) The Execution of Lady Jane Grey. Paul Delaroche, 1833. I like this because...I don't know. The scale of it in person is quite something but also, there's something quite chilling about the perspective- you're being forced to take a front row seat at the death of this woman

https://www.nationalgallery.org.uk/paintings/paul-delaroche-the-execution-of-lady-jane-grey

3) The Trial of Queen Caroline 1820, George Hayter, 1820-1823

Okay this isn't the painting I was looking for, I'm pretty sure Hayter also did one of some dude dying either in the Lords or the Commons but I can't find that on the website, and this one is also epic. The detail, my god. The skill and the PATIENCE this must have taken. Sir, I am in awe...

https://www.npg.org.uk/collections/search/portraitExtended/mw00036/The-Trial-of-Queen-Caroline-1820?LinkID=mp02106&search=sas&sText=sir+george+hayter&OConly=true&role=sit&rNo=0

4) King Henry VIII; King Henry VII, Hans Holbein The Younger, 1536-1537

Is it the prettiest piece in the gallery? nope, but it's fascinating- it's prep work for a painting that has since been lost and considering that this is only part of it, the scale of that painting....also the fact it would have been a Holbein....goddamn passage of time, there goes what was probably a stunning, stunning artwork. I love that we get a glimpse at the process of Holbein's work, though. I love that you have the recognisable, Henry VIII power stance...and his dad behind him, presumably going HEY HENRY WHAT THE FUCK WHAT ARE YOU DOING UNDIVORCE THE POPE RIGHT NOW AND ALSO I CANNOT *BELIEVE* YOU JUST EXECUTED YOUR WIFE, I AM SO DISAPPOINTED DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW BADLY YOUR BEHAVIOUR IS UPSETTING YOUR MOTHER- (of course he's relegated to the back of the portrait, so presumably Henry VIII is going la la la not listening too busy posing for a painting to commemorate the birth of my baby BOY)

https://www.npg.org.uk/collections/search/portrait/mw03080/King-Henry-VIII-King-Henry-VII?LinkID=mp02144&search=sas&sText=Henry+VII&OConly=true&role=sit&rNo=2

5) Surprised! (Tiger In A Tropical Storm), Henry Rousseau, 1891

I often forget to go and admire this one, because...I just do, but five year old me was obsessed, okay. The Tiger In A Tropical Storm is one of the first paintings I can remember recognising- remembering that I'd seen it before, and like....just look at it, okay? Look at the kitty! Poor kitty doesn't like the nasty weather :( and *look* at how Rousseau's created that weather. There's something that's just so dynamic about this one- I half expect to hear the wind or to see lightening splitting the canvas.

[chris-evans-indian-fanfic]

Love

One-Shot

Description: Asexual!Bucky thinks he is broken beyond repair, until you show him that he has been complete all this while.

Warnings: Angst, bad language, mention of sex toys, romance and fluff

@jtargaryen18 organised a writing challenge for reaching 4k followers and of course I have to participate multiple times! 😍 I am sorry this entry is a little late 🙈

My Main Masterlist

A/N: This is the first time I am writing an asexual character. Whatever I have written is based upon my knowledge that I have gathered by reading various articles and posts on asexuality. The reason I am writing this is because I want to have an equal amount of straight and LGBTQ+ stories in my masterlist, so that there's something for everyone to enjoy. Hence, if you are an asexual person or know someone who is, and you realise that anything in my story is incorrectly represented, then please let me know. I will immediately correct it, issue an apology and accept my mistake publicly. 

I don’t consent to have any of my work published or featured on any third party app, website or translated. If you are seeing this fanfiction anywhere but Tumblr and AO3, it has been reposted without my permission. In that case, please do share the link and let me know.

…

"I cannot fucking believe this!" Karen shouted, "What are you like gay or something?"

Bucky winced at her venomous words. "You need to leave," he said in a quiet, respectful tone.

"Like hell I am going to leave. I want answers!" she placed her hands on her hips and stomped her foot. "What is it? Am I not sexy enough for you? Are you not attracted by this?!" she gestured towards the skimpy lingerie currently hugging her body.

Bucky met her eyes as he responded, "I do not want to have sex with you." 

She huffed, clearly not convinced, "Why not? We have been going out for what, 3 months now? And you still don't want to have sex with me? What is the issue here? Is it-" she paused suddenly, her eyes traveling down his torso to his crotch, "You can't get it up can you?" she sneered.

Bucky shook his head, too exhausted to deal with her, "Karen, it's nothing like that. I just do not want to get physical with you. That's all."

"Oh! Ooooohh!" she bent backwards a bit, "So it was fine to hug me, cuddle with me and hold my hands. But when it comes to sex, you suddenly become a pious celibate saint! What the fuck Bucky?"

Bucky sighed, and handed Karen back her coat, "We are done. Please leave."

She laughed dryly, "Oh abso-fucking-lutely we are done. You know what I think?" she asked while wearing the coat, "I think that you are too old grandpa and that your tiny ass tortured gay dick cannot salute on its own. Because no man in his right mind would deny this," she again pointed to herself. "Super-soldier my ass," she muttered as she left.

The door to his apartment closed with a loud bang, leaving an echo in its wake. Bucky stood still, rooted to his spot. If it were not for the silent tears rolling down his cheeks, anybody could have mistaken him for a statue. 

Slowly, he sat on the floor, his gentle sobs rocking his body as he hugged his knees. 

Decades of torture by the hands of Hydra had left him crippled, physically, mentally and emotionally. When he had been saved by Steve, he had started to piece his life back together, bit by bit. Things such as books, movies, music became tiny jigsaw pieces that slowly filled the void in his life. 

After the final galactic battle with Thanos, Bucky had been officially initiated to the Avengers team, or rather what was left of it. The team soon became an extended family, a family that Bucky was still getting used to. It was especially irksome when Sam and Scott decided to set him up on a date with Karen from Research & Development (R&D), despite his protests.

It wasn't that Bucky didn't desire a relationship. He wanted to be close to someone, experience romance, feel their heartbeat in a close embrace and place light kisses on their forehead. 

But he didn't want to have sex.

At first, he thought he might not have met the right woman. So he searched for porn online, which did little to sway his feelings. He put the issue on a backburner, the safety of the people and the urgency of his missions steering the wheel of his life for a while. 

But when Sam and Scott proudly announced their grand plans for Bucky's date, he remembered his "issue" again. He looked at Karen closely whenever they went on dates together. She looked perfect. Beautiful hair, soft glowing skin, curves in all the right places, all packed in a graceful, slender body.

Bucky liked being close to her, but he was still not getting aroused. Hence, he stopped her advancements everytime she tried to get physical. Karen tolerated it for a while, before her patience wore out tonight.

As the sun rose in the sky, Bucky was still seated on the floor, his cheeks now stained with tears that had stopped sometime in the night, though a sniff escaped from him every few minutes. He looked at the sunlight pouring in from the window, broken by the window-panes, landing at his feet in two rays with a comforting warmth. It was in that moment that Bucky realised, Hydra had truly broken him.

🏳️‍🌈

"We have various types of dildos available. There's The Classic, Textured, Long and Thin, Short and Thick, Vibrators, Transparent Plexiglass Dildos, Strap-Ons, G-Spot Dildos, Double-Ended, Squirting Dildos and ones that also come with a suction grip. Are you looking for yourself or are you looking for something to enjoy with your partner?" the helpful saleswoman asked you.

You stroked your chin in thought, "It's only for me. I already have a vibrator that I bought about a year back. The G-Spot ones have never really worked for me. I am looking to try something new. What is the suction grip one?" 

The attendant handed you the dildo and showed you the suction grip at the end of it, "You can use this to place and stick it on any flat surface you want, whether it's the floor or the wall or the side of your desk. It guarantees a completely hands-free pleasurable experience."

You stuck it on the wall besides the showcase to test the theory. It worked. "Neat! I will take this one," you smiled as the attendant went to fetch a fresh piece.

You paid for your new sex toy and walked back to the Avengers compound with your small white shopping bag in tow.

When you reached your desk, you heard Karen bitching as usual about something to Jessica. At first, you blocked them out like you did almost everyday, but then a name in their conversation caught your attention.

"He's the Winter Soldier alright. He's completely frozen down there," Karen whispered loudly with disgust. 

"Even that red sexy lingerie didn't do anything for him?" Jessica gasped dramatically.

"No!"

"That's crazy! That hot-red piece will convert even the most gayest of the guys! And it didn't do anything for him? Wow," Jessica responded.

Karen added, "You know something? I have always thought he was extremely weird. Like, dude, I know you were tortured by Hydra or whatever, but get over it man! It's been years since he was free. He should enjoy life and stop being such a wimp. I am 100% sure he is impotent."

"You know I was digging into him the other night," Jessica said in a hushed whisper, "and I saw a message board online which suggested that his penis has been completely cut by Hydra. This person knows all such secrets about these alleged superheros. You should follow him."

"What is his username?"

"Proud-Flat-Earther-MotherFuckers. Wait, I will send you the link," Jessica offered. 

Having heard enough of their nonsense, you made your way towards the HR department. Maybe both Karen and Jessica had forgotten, but talking about the personal lives of Avengers was strictly against the rules and was considered as reason enough to fire employees. 

You filed a complaint with the HR and within a few hours, both the women were fired on the spot. You savored the moment with relish, as their faces turned aghast at the realisation that their actions had consequences. You went up to them, watching the pair clean their desks, with unabashed glee. 

"You know something Karen?" you asked her, "Just because a man refuses to have sex, it didn't mean that he's a wimp, or gay or an impotent. But if you do choose to think of him that way, then it surely makes you a sexiest and a homophobic person."

Karen looked at you furiously, "You bitch! I lost my job because you went and blabbed in front of the HR!"

You chuckled at her outburst, "Oh my dearest Karen. Yes I did go and rat you out to the HR. But that's not what got the two of you fired."

"Then what did?" Jessica asked as she joined the conversation. 

You folded your hands for effect, "Your hateful comments and toxic views cost you your jobs. People like you think that just by using the latest iPhone or following the latest trends, you are a modern, 21st century person. But in reality, it is your open mindset which makes you a member of the modern society. If you would open your mind just as much as you open your legs, trust me, the two of you will be much better off."

You turned to leave, but stopped yourself, "Just a suggestion. Stop using words like gay and impotent as insults. It will help you retain your next job for a longer time." You winked at their speechless faces, and happily returned to your desk. 

Your job in R&D was taxing and so, you always found yourself working late. Today was no exception either. As you left your office at around 8pm, you saw Bucky heading towards the elevator which led to his apartment. You always had a soft spot for the brunette super-soldier. For starters, you couldn't even begin to comprehend the tortures he must have endured in his past. And the fact that he was trying to piece his life back together again? It was truly commendable.

He always kept to himself, his eyes downcast and his body language unsure. And after what you had heard today, you felt even more sorry for the guy. Turning towards the cafeteria, you picked up a box of vanilla-strawberry French macarons for him, thanking the heavens above for the free food available at the Avengers compound. You held the white bag with macarons in your left hand, being mindful of not confusing it with the similar white bag in your right which contained your new sex toy. 

A few moments later, you found yourself in front of his apartment. You had visited him twice before to adjust his vibranium arm or to sort out a few tweaks, but never before had you visited him so late in the evening. 

You knocked, feeling a little hesitant as you did so. He was surprised to find you standing on the opposite of the door, however, he still greeted you courteously nonetheless. 

Before you could state your reason for the visit, he said sincerely, "I heard what you did today. Thank you. I really appreciated it."

Now it was your turn to be surprised, "Oh. Ummm. It's okay really Mr Barnes. It was nothing. You don't need to-"

"No. It wasn't just nothing. You could have turned a deaf ear and ignored them. Yet you chose to stand-up for me. Thank you," a small smile laced his face and you melted on the spot.

You had a crush on Bucky. A BIG one. Could anyone blame you? This guy was a hot, sexy mess of an ice-cream sundae that left you hungry for more even on the coldest nights of the year. 

You realised you were staring into his steel-blue eyes like a creep, and immediately cleared your throat. "What-what they did was wrong. Karen had no right to demean you for your desires or lack of them. I-," you sighed, "I am sorry for what she said. It was disrespectful and hurtful. So I brought you something that I hope will cheer you up."

You awkwardly raised your right hand, "I got you some vanilla-strawberry macarons from the cafeteria."

Bucky did cheer up a bit at the mention of his favourite food. He eagerly took the bag with a huge smile, "Thank you," he said once again as you shook your head. "Thank you for everything you do to keep us safe Mr Barnes. I must be on my way now. Goodnight," and with that you left, grinning like an idiot.

🏳️‍🌈

You took a bath, ate your dinner and slipped into comfortable pyjamas. Excited to try your new sex toy tonight, you unpacked the bag expecting to see the nondescript box of the dildo. Instead, 5 delicious macarons stared back at you with innocence. 

You stumbled backwards in shock, the impact of your action settling like a dull, heavy weight in your stomach. "Oh no no no no," you whispered, horrified.

You immediately rushed to your window and pulled aside the curtain to look at Bucky's building, as if expecting to see him staring daggers at you. One of the privileges of working with the Avengers? You got to stay in a nice apartment within the compound itself. Your residential complex was a little further away from the main building, covered easily by 15 minutes of walking. 

Feeling hyper, you frantically searched for a coat and almost ran out of your house. You rushed back in to keep the box in the bag and again, dashed towards the elevator. 

Hoping that Bucky would have yet to open the box, you sent a silent prayer to all the gods and goddesses in the skies above, even Thor. Meh, you never know when an ex-Avenger could be of help.

You sprinted towards the other building, a multitude of thoughts clouding your mind- What if he was offended by it? Would he file a complaint against me? It would be sorta ironic if I was fired for this! Shit he would think my apology was false and I am probably mocking him.

You reached his apartment, a panting, huffing mess of a person. You knocked frantically, his door shaking with force at your desperation. However, you jumped as Bucky whispered your name from behind you, "Are you okay? What's going on?" he asked with concern as you turned around to face him.

"Did-did you op-open the bo-ox?" you questioned him while panting like a dog. 

He furrowed his brows in response, "No I was planning to open it in a few minutes. Please tell me what's going on. Why do you look so scared?"

You bent over double, your stomach cramping thanks to your impromptu running, "Thi-this is your bag," you held up the package, "That ba-bag is mine."

"Okay," Bucky said slowly, still unsure of your behaviour, "Should I open the door to retrieve your bag?"

You nodded as he stepped aside, "Why are you not wearing any shoes?"

You looked down at your feet at his query, small blades of grass had stuck to your naked feet along with dirt. "I was in a hur-hurry to get to you," you managed to say between your breaths.

Bucky just nodded in response. It was then that you noticed the pack of paper tissues in his hand. He opened the door and stepped inside, beckoning you to follow him. He pointed to the white bag kept on the table while he looked at it with worry. "Will it explode?" he solicited.

"Uhh no," you replied awkwardly.

"Is it dangerous?" curiosity etched on Bucky's face as you swapped the bags.

"No, it's nothing like that," you looked down at your feet, feeling the heat rush to your cheeks with embarrassment.

He narrowed his eyes, "Then what is it?"

"I can't tell you," you quietly admitted, "but here are your macarons. I am really sorry for this. Didn't mean to disturb you from whatever you had planned," you pointed to the box of tissues still in his hand. 

Bucky noticed the underlying question in your statement, "I was about to watch a movie. So needed these to clear the mess."

Your eyes went wide at his sincerity. While you had a crush on him, you definitely did not want to know about Bucky's late night masturbation adventures. Shaking your head, you raised your hands and started walking backwards, "I am sorry I disturbed your nightly… activities. I get out of your hair."

"Actually, would you like to join me for the movie?" Bucky asked hopefully, "We have the macarons and you seem like you need to calm your nerves."

You were surprised for the third time that day. Did Bucky just ask you to masturbate with him? Or have sex while eating the macarons? Or did he want to eat them after you guys have had sex? A flurry of questions swirled in your mind as you stared at him with a slightly open mouth. 

Bucky interpreted your gaze and stumbled to clarify himself, "As friends! Would you like to watch a movie with me as a friend?"

You slowly nodded your affirmation, "Yeah okay. Which movie are we watching?" 

"The Notebook," he revealed with a smile, "It's an extremely emotional movie. Ummm what's the term? Tear-jerker? Uhh yeah, it's a real tear-jerker of a movie."

"Oh so that's why…" you pointed at the tissues. "Yeah," he confirmed, "I tend to cry a lot while watching that movie. And… ummm… I am the kind of person who cries ugly. You know, all tears and snot. So yeah… I need the whole box."

"That's… that's actually sweet," you smiled, "Trust me you are not alone. I start crying as soon as the titles appear on the screen."

He got excited at your confession, "Yes! Exactly! It's because you know what's going to come and you are just mentally preparing yourself."

You chuckled with him in affirmation as he led you further into his apartment.

You freshened up a bit in his washroom, making sure to clean your feet and the residue on your face from the sweat.

Bucky was standing besides your bag when you entered the living room, "Now that we are friends," he intoned, "will you please tell me what's inside of this?"

You sighed, "Mr Barnes-." 

"Bucky," he corrected you and you smiled. 

"Will you promise me you will not take any offense or be insulted by it? I really did not mean to swap the bags."

"I trust you," Bucky said with assurance.

"It's…it is a sex toy," you mumbled quietly. Any normal human wouldn't have heard you, but Bucky's enhanced hearing caught your words flawlessly. 

He took a moment to process your words, and finally, to your amazement, burst out laughing. 

You sheepishly smiled at his reaction as your heart felt a little lighter. "That is embarrassing," he agreed with a wide grin. 

The two of you settled on the couch as Bucky's chuckles lessened. He kept the box of macarons between you two, but hesitated to begin the movie.

You sensed his curiosity, and clarified, "I haven't been in a relationship in a very long time. It's been… 2 years I guess… since my last breakup." You took a deep breath, "And my job doesn't exactly leave a lot of time on my hands for dating or one-night-stands."

Bucky seemed to consider your words for what felt like a long time. Finally, he asked quietly, "What does it feel like? To… to want another person… sexually?"

You blinked your eyes, thinking you must have misheard him. But then, his gaze met yours, and you knew his question was sincere.

"It feels like…," you raked your mind in search for the appropriate words, "...like your entire body is on fire, and you need the touch of the other person to quench your thirst. Like, just for a few moments, you want to shut your mind, and let your body think for you."

Bucky nodded slowly as you finished, "But what if you feel that in your heart? And not for your body?"

You squint your eyes at his question, "What do you mean Bucky?"

He placed his head in his hands, "I just… I don't feel like that with anyone. I mean, I don't want to have sex. Trust me I have tried everything. Literally everything. Still I don't feel aroused… I am broken, aren't I? Because this is abnormal, right? No matter how hard I try I will never be normal."

Your heart shattered at his words. You had heard about his horrid nightmares, but to think that he was struggling to accept himself, thinking that he was broken, even when he had so much love to give, was depressing. You could not just stand by and watch.

Gently, you placed a hand on his shoulder, "Bucky, look at me." When he didn't comply, you urged him, "Bucky, you are not broken. It is completely normal to not have any sexual desires."

"No it's not," he scoffed.

"Yes it is," you coerced him, "Do you know what is asexuality? It is the complete absence of sexual desires. Many people-"

He interrupted you, "There is no such thing. You are making this up."

"I am not," you replied indignantly, "Research indicates that more than 1% of the American population is asexual. Also, experts believe that more people might be asexuals because they think that they "haven't found the right person yet"," you ended with air quotes.

With no reaction from him, you sighed and got up, "Do yourself a favour. Use the internet and learn about asexuality. It will help put your mind at ease." You left after giving that piece of advice.

Bucky stayed in the same position for a few moments after your departure. He nibbled on a macaron as he considered the movie playing in front of him. Unable to focus, he promptly shut it all and carried the box to his bed. The macarons disappeared into his mouth as he tossed and turned, feeling restless. 

There was no way asexuality was a thing. If it was, then how come there were no movies, tv shows or even advertisements on asexuality? That's because it wasn't normal, right? Maybe you had just lied to him to make him feel better? Maybe you took pity on him?

He looked at his phone on the table near the tv set, your final words repeating in his head in a loop. The combination of tiredness and laziness encouraged him to take your advice in the morning.

🏳️‍🌈

You didn't see Bucky for 3 days after your fateful encounter with him. The fact that you still had your job at the Avengers Tower meant that he hadn't filed a complaint yet with the HR. And for that you were grateful. Friday came and you found yourself working late, again. It was around 10pm and you were still in your lab, almost done with the work. That's when you heard the small swoosh of the lab doors opening and closing.

You looked up from your table, and found Bucky staring intently at you with his blue eyes. He cleared his throat and tentatively took a step towards you. "You were right," he said slowly, "I researched online, read a few articles and spoke with the in-house therapist. I am an," he took a deep breath, "an asexual."

You closed your laptop and smiled at his confession, "How are you feeling now?"

"Honestly? A little bit better. I feel somewhat free," he admitted while gripping the white bag in his hand a little bit tighter.

"That's great! I am so proud of the progress you have made," you beamed at him, but sensed his hesitance as you neared him.

"What's wrong?" you gently inquired.

"You are… not… I mean… by any chance… asexual?" he winced at his own question.

You chuckled lightly, "No I am not."

"Ahh, then it's okay," he murmured and turned as if to leave.

You stopped him by placing a hand on his firm bicep, "What's going on?"

He shifted on his feet, visibly uncomfortable and anxious, "I was just… no nevermind it's stupid."

"Bucky," you said his name in a stern voice.

He sighed again, "I thought… I mean I owe you a movie because… of that night… and so… you know… would you like to watch it? The movie? But why would you? You deserve better… you are not an asexual. You are normal. Why would you want to go on a date with me?" he finally ended his mumbling.

You looked at him with squinted eyes, trying to decipher what he had muttered. "Did you just say you would like to go on a date with me? But it was stupid because you are an asexual and I am normal?" you blinked as he nodded.

"Who told you that you are not normal?" you asked him, a little irritated, "Bucky look at me." This time he complied, "You. Are. Normal. As normal as me, as the other Avengers or as anybody else in the world. Do not, for even one goddamn second, think that there's something wrong with you because there isn't. Are you listening to me? Am I clear?" you wagged your forefinger at him.

Amused at your outburst, he nodded with a sheepish grin. Clearing his throat, he asked you again, "Would you like to watch a movie with me tomorrow? As a date?"

You placed your hands on your waist, "Yes."

His grin widened as he asked you the next question, "Still mad at me?"

"Uh-huh."

"Maybe these cupcakes will help," he shyly held up the white bag in front of you, "I made sure they were cupcakes," he added with a smirk.

You graciously accepted the bag, "Cupcakes will always help."

"Great! It's a date then. Tomorrow… at 4pm? My apartment?" Bucky suggested.

You agreed, and he left with a goodbye. As soon as he was out of sight, you opened the box, expecting to see the usual cupcakes inside. Instead, you found that the sweet treats were decorated with cute messages such as "U R Cute" , "Be Mine?" , "So Sweet" and so on. Feeling mushy at his adorable gesture, you bit into the sweet treat as you headed back to your apartment.

The next day, you made sure to wear a purple dress, complete with black, grey and white accessories - the colours of the asexual flag. Bucky beamed at you as he welcomed you into his apartment. He had made a snack mix from popcorn, crispy pretzels, chips and nachos, the perfect accompaniment to any movie according to him, and you couldn't agree more.

The pair of you watched The Notebook in silence, except for a few sobs and sniffs here and there and the straight up bawling during the emotional parts of the movie.

After a while, the film ended but your date continued. The two of you talked about everything, right from the meaningful discussions about the government policies to random questions like "which mythical creature would you be and why?"

Soon, it was time for you to head back to your apartment. Bucky offered to walk you and you happily agreed. But before you left, he asked you nervously, "Would you like to have a second date?"

"I would love to," you beamed, "Which movie should we watch the next time?"

He ran his hand in his somewhat disheveled hair, "Uhh… I actually made a date jar. Wait, I will get it."

He brought over a glass jar, filled with tiny bits of folded paper, "I thought we could have dates that start from each English alphabet. We can pick and choose at random from the jar."

Tears pricked the corner of your eyes again at his thoughtful and romantic gesture. You gingerly picked one note from the jar, excited for the adventure that awaited the two of you.

🏳️‍🌈

It took more than 2 years for the pair of you to finish every date in the date jar, except for one. Whether it was jet-skiing in the ocean, taking classes for flamenco dance, him teaching you self-defense or going on a wildlife safari together, you and Bucky finally got through it all. Only the letter "P" was now left.

In these 2 years, any distance between the two of you had practically vanished. Bucky was comfortable in removing his bionic arm in front of you. Moreover, he had started sharing everything with you. Right from his darkest and disturbing nightmares to a pretty butterfly that he may have seen during his missions, Bucky made it a point to ensure that you were a part of his life, and you had absolutely no complaints.

The two of you had also discussed about your sexual desires, and Bucky had been comfortable with you using your sex toys as and when you wished.

Bucky was the perfect boyfriend anybody could ask for. He was considerate, thoughtful, a hardcore feminist and gave the best foot-rubs in the world. And so you were nervous. Nervous because the two of you had never actually sat down to talk about the nature of your relationship. And as the day of the last date loomed nearer, your anxiety increased. At first, you thought of making a second date jar, but he had quickly dismissed the idea, stating that he would be caught up with multiple things after the last date ended.

As you sat in the car that Bucky had sent for you, your apprehension grew. Bucky always picked you up, however this time, he had asked you to come alone in the car. Maybe he wanted to break up with you?

By the time you reached the park it was pitch black. You were sure Bucky had paid the guards to keep the gates of the park open just for you.

As soon as you entered, you saw the pathway lined with 25 lamp posts, leading you towards a breathtaking archway decorated with fairy lights and your favourite flowers.

On every lamp post, a photograph of the two of you - which were taken on your dates - was stuck along with a note. The notes described how he fell in love with you over and over again on every single date. Your progress was slow, as read each of his meticulously written words with tears in your eyes. You collected all of his notes and the photographs, and finally headed towards the lit archway.

When you entered it, the instrumental notes of the song "All of Me" by John Legend reached your ears.

You walked ahead and reached a bend. Upon crossing it, you were showered with rose petals as the live music grew louder. And at the end of the archway, your boyfriend, James Buchanan Barnes, was standing in a tuxedo, looking as sinfully good as the forbidden fruit. The entire area around him was lit with soft fairy lights that cascaded gracefully between tall lamp posts. Even on the ground, small wooden lamps illuminated the grass across the area. A live band was playing the music and your Bucky was standing with the most gorgeous bouquet of red roses that you had ever seen.

Your vision turned blurry as you started crying, and looking at your tears, he started sobbing as well. "No no no I can't cry now," he managed to say between his sobs while giving you his handkerchief, "I have to do this."

He got down on one knee and took your hand in his. You both laughed as you started crying harder. He took a deep breath and said your name, "These 2 years have been the most magical years of my life. You have accepted me as who I am, what I am, and never once tried to change me or make fun of me for it. I never thought I would be treated with the amount of respect that-" he started crying, unable to finish his sentence.

You sat beside him and handed him your kerchief. "Yes," you said with a tear-stained smile.

"Let me ask you first!" he exclaimed between his sobs.

You laughed and wiped your snot as he cleared his throat, "I love you so much. You are the only one I want to-" he started crying again.

"Yes!" you answered his unsaid question.

"I haven't asked you yet!" he exclaimed again as the two of you giggled between your sobs.

"Okay c'mon Bucky you can do this," he muttered to himself as you beamed at him. "Okay," he looked into your eyes and whispered your name, "Will you do me the honour of marrying me and becoming my wife?"

You choked up at finally hearing the words. Rendered speechless, you could only nod as fresh tears escaped your eyes.

"You have to say yes!" he almost shouted with excitement.

"Yes! Yes! Yes!!" you matched his enthusiasm as he slipped a ring onto your finger. His large arms then engulfed you in a bear hug, wrapping you in a safe and secure space for eternity to come.

Permanent tag: @donutloverxo @notyourtypicalrose @just-one-ordinary-fangirl

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