#I do not approve

[pandorasboxoftreasures]

The Algorithm Strikes Again

Me: *Sees funny Avatar post in “More Like This”*

*Clicks*

*About to reblog*

*Sees username and tags*

*Sees they’re a Neteyam sexualiser*

*Stop*

*Close tab*

*Purge history and cookies*

*Close browser window*

*Uninstall browser*

*Shut down PC*

*Yank mouse USB from PC*

*Take out box of matches*

*Burn box of matches*

*Burn mouse*

*Shove hand in flames to be safe*

[hippolotamus]

Oh goodie, now I can’t talk. At least I can still be a menace here.

[adreamthatsworthkeeping]

[writeforfandoms]

I just love it when stress manifests as me jumping between five wips in one day, it’s so much fun

[ohhtobeagooner]

jane and beard getting married… right after beard’s emotional plotline and name reveal…

[sinistershepherd]

Mom, the fake kinky women are at the door again

[xicanaroja]

I recently went down an internet rabbit hole of job interview tips, and accidentally stumbled an Eye Contact Guide to Communication article which is INSANE. No one told me there was Specific rules to eye contact. I mean I already hated eye contact, but still. Rules???? You gotta make eye contact before you even start talking? Keep eye contact for 4-5 seconds at a time??? How do you count that, just in your head? How will you remember what you're about to say if you're always counting seconds??? And then you're supposed to look to the side, slowly and briefly - NOT down - and then resume eye contact for another 4-5 seconds, over and over forever. THAT'S SO MUCH TO DO. This is an insane requirement to society, can't I just talk at you and make sporadic gestures and look at your face but not your eyes??? Whack rules. Stupid laws of humanity. 0/10.

[songs-ofa-dyingbird]

I feel really weird and it’s like- I’m trying to figure out if I’m sick, if I ate too much or too little, if it’s anxiety, Mayhaps I’m just convincing myself I feel shitty because I want an excuse to be lazy- maybe I’m legit sick frfr, maybe I need to eat lunch, maybe I need to skip lunch, maybe I drank too much coffee??????

[forlornmelody]

Today's List of Nice Things:

Got in all my steps today

My kitty continues to have more energy. I think he might be sneezing less too

Hannah Einbender's comedy special is pretty good. And very queer.

It's supposed to be cooler tomorrow. Thank goodness.

[cascadianights]

I'm all for recognizing the difference bw something that is actually problematic vs something that's just annoying

On that note

I find the songs people put in to podcasts (long intro songs are bad, songs to enter and come back from commercials are HELL) to be a hell created specifically to torture me

I admire the work that went in. I appreciate that others are getting great shit out of this.

I hate it w my entire being and especially the chaotic ones are the worst shit ever

[paintedcrows]

It is imperative to me that Bill and Stan do torrid Duchess Approves roleplay and argue about character motivations

[itachi86]

oh noo i do not approve

[puppyeared]

who is your favorite AA character? 👁️👁️

ziska… I hope capcom brings her back someday

[inkskinned]

the problem is that being single is seen as the consolidation prize, and not the natural neutral state of being-a-person. at the end of the movie or the book or the poetry, there is a person waiting for you at the altar, and they love you. if the play is a comedy, everyone gets married. the metaphor is about how you are not-whole. the metaphor is about how everyone is going to be happily-ever-after. the metaphor is that romantic love is the most important resource on the planet, not just all-love. all-love is not a thing, that is a disappointment. the treasure is not the friends we made along the way. the treasure is the girl you landed.

the metaphor is that you cannot be alone, that means you are broken. are you getting over someone? that is acceptable, you can be getting over someone, but not for long. you must be single because you would rather not be single. you must be single and looking to not-be-single. you must want to date, eventually.

friendship and community are never seen as being equal-to or even-better than romantic connection. that person is your one! you need to find them. you need to hunt through the sand particles until you can shift out some kind of gem. this is regardless to your own experience of the beach and the sun. you need to be somewhere with someone.

if you are taking this time alone to heal, that is so sad. everyone gives you this little pitying look. the understanding is that you are not actually happier than you were before you were single. it is seen as a sort of pity - oh, you are choosing yourself, making yourself the priority? - that isn't quite right. you must mean that you are making yourself ready for the right person. you are just laying the bed better this time. open up your heart. you'll find them, we promise!

what do you mean you're really-truly genuinely-very happy? you are probably misremembering what it was like to be in a relationship. and besides, once you meet your person, that time will look grey and bland and wasted. your person is the only way for you to see in color. so what if you have taken this time - for the first time in your entire life - to actually-for-real do the fucking work. you can be proud of yourself, sure. but the way we need to know that you got better is that you get a partner. you're healed enough for the next bad part!

people don't choose to be single, they just say they're choosing to be single - they actually mean "nobody wants to date me." it doesn't matter how many people you have gently rejected or how many times you've talked it over carefully in therapy. what matters is that you are single, and by all accounts - that means you are something worth our pity. your successes and life all seem pale in the sunlight. sure, you have done amazing things and finally found your way in life. what matters is that there wasn't a person in the room with you while you did it.

you want to tell them - that's the whole thing. i didn't know how to be alone in the room. i didn't know how to handle the silence. every moment was so sharp, and i kept choosing the wrong way to close the door. i have spent my entire life in the empty well, living in the ricochet of someone else's cruelty. for once i have built myself a ladder. for once everything i taste is all mine, every bite of sunshine and laughter. i have learned how to sleep out in the open with my memories. recently, they have started to purr.

your father rolls his eyes. listen. this isn't about you. i just want a grandchild in my future.

[kizzer55555]

The Vampire Aesthetic

Ok so Danny knows two billionaires personally and they really couldn’t be more different. Yet they had one thing in common. A vampire aesthetic. Sam is fully into goth. Spiderwebs, bats, the color black. She enjoys fangs and fake blood and the darkness of her soul. Meanwhile, Vlad is Vlad. If his name wasn’t enough, the dark clothing, pale skin, and flying around with a cape and fangs with coffins in his mansion really sells it.

Danny doesn’t know many rich people so he thinks this might be some kind of trend. (If Paulina is rich, her family likes the chupacabra) So he just thinks that all rich people have some kind of vampire thing going on.

Cue Danny somehow ending in the Wayne household. Maybe he was brought over as a friend of one of the bats, maybe rescued from a field trip/vacation gone wrong, maybe some other situation. But he is there in civilian form with civilian Waynes and Danny just takes a good long look around the inside of the mansion.

“So where’s the vampire aesthetic?

Everyone freezes.

Danny just starts looking around, checking behind paintings and feeling the walls for secret levers. Used to secret passages with Vlad and possibly Sam. The Fentons definitely had them when they were temporarily rich.

“Come on, I know you guys are hiding it.”

Cue the entire batfamily thinking that this is another Tim and that he is fully aware that these people are the batfamily. Danny hangs around the mansion more and the bats just start dropping their disguises and not even bothering to hide stuff around Danny because they assume he already knows. (Possibly even trying to recruit him to be a new bat) Meanwhile, Danny, who does not know these people are batman and his birds, just does not pick up on any of it.

He grew up in a health violation with a giant ballon observatory lab above his head and a portal to the afterlife in his basement. He is a half dead teenager who has tea with the god of time and his godfather is the other parent to his clone child. He’s used to death lazers being scattered across his home and mysterious stains on clothing.

People are weird! He doesn’t judge!

[erosmoonlore]

had a long ass fkn day and on my way home this huge black cat just leapt out of the bushes like slinky malinky and was all hey baby girl, you wanna pet me?