#I didn't specify Regulus's birth sex

[jaylienpotter]

Jegulus microfic | 1.8k

TW: implied sex, trauma, discussion about sexual abuse/assault, discussion about r*pe, incest

Obliviate

"Hey Reggie!" James placed a sweet and eager kiss on his boyfriend's lips. "Sorry, the boys wanted to do something and when I said I was ditching to see you, well, your brother stalled me even more..."

"Ugh. Typical Sirius. He's such a drama queen. One of the few things he takes after the family." He rolled his eyes, the icy blue nearly on the back of his head. It was almost scary, the things he could do with his eyes. Like stare you down, even if you're way taller.

"Well, what do you feel like doing? Where shall our date be?" He grinned at the word 'date', always a lovestruck puppy. He was so obviously in love. After they told people about their relationship, he'd use every moment he could to tell the world who he was dating.

Regulus pretended to be annoyed but he found it quite cute. James was a summer child in a teenager's body. "My dorm...? It's empty. Will be for some hours."

"Lead the way, my star."

Jamie had never been to the Slytherin common room, immeadiately pointing out the "depressing" lack of light. He wasn't expecting, however, a big window to the inside of the lake. He talked about the differences from the Gryffindor's (which Regulus had already been to). He had to be quite literally dragged away from the water's view, into the dormitory. The door had barely closed before Black kissed his boyfriend against the wall.

"You talk too much."

"Oh. Uh- okay." Poor boy looked like a deer in the headlights, somewhat disoriented from the unexpected deep kiss.

"You're cute when you're flustered."

"Oh, really?" Tanned hands wrapped around a smaller, much paler body, plump lips against the downturned smirk. The kiss was teasing yet silly, some chuckles or giggles escaping in between pecks. They progressively got more intense and deeper, the sneaky marauder placed his leg in between Reg's, pressing up. He got pulled away.

"Shit, sorry! I thought- Don't worry, we don't have to do anything if you're not ready." The sincerity could be seen through the panic in his dark, warm eyes.

"It's okay. Don't worry about it."

"I'm sorry, the way you said for us to come here because we'd be by ourselves... and pushed me against the wall... I got the wrong idea, I'm sorry. But I won't do anything you don't want me to, alright? I promise."

The shortest sighed, looking down. "It's not that, I just-" Words got stuck "-It doesn't matter."

"Of course it does... Reg, you can talk to me. What were you going to say? I won't get hurt or mad or any of that."

His gaze was avoided for a few seconds. "Do you promise you won't tell anyone? Not even Sirius?"

"Is he involved...?"

"No. I just don't want him to know."

"I respect that. I solemnly swear I'll keep it a secret." The other boy took a deep breath and sat on the bed, followed by his boyfriend.

"When... when I was 7, the family gathered for my aunt Druella's birthday party-" He paused for a few seconds. "My cousin Bella called me up to her room to play. I was happy because Sirius was talking to Dromeda so I went." James was silent, listening attentively. Which Regulus appreciated. "She uhm... we played a game - rather, she told me to play a game - in which I was supposed to have my eyes closed and guess what I was touching. First it was things like a quill, a family heirloom... Then she placed my hand on her boob. To me it was just a game so I guessed. When I got it right she praised me-" An exhale left abruptly, one he didn't know he was holding back. "And... Lastly she put my hand- like... in her, you know...? Like... Inside her vulva."

Beetle eyes widened, but before he could get an answer, Reg kept talking. If he stopped, he might not have the guts to ever finish.

"She used my hand to make herself feel good and I opened my eyes. I didn't understand what it meant back then. It was a tad weird, given the purpose of the 'game'. But I didn't know better, I mean I was a child."

"How old was she?"

"17. She's 10 years older than me."

"Fuck... Reggie I-"

He extended his white palm, faced towards the listener. "I'm not finished." He hoped it didn't sound rude. He just couldn't stop now. "She tried to obliviate me after she was done. But she didn't do the spell right and I looked so confused already that it seemed like it worked. She doesn't know I remember." He sighed, allowing for comments or questions. He needed a little break.

"I'm so sorry... That's- that's fucked up. Really fucked up... Can I hug you?"

"No, at least not yet." He was offered a hand, which he took in his. Thankfully Potter wasn't judging him. Nor making him feel guilty for it. It was comforting. "Bellatrix- she wasn't the only one. In the summer before my second year, my uncle Cygnus pulled me to the side. Locked the door, did an impertupable charm and took his pants off. Told me to suck him. I didn't want to. Already understood what it meant. But he said he'd use Imperio and I didn't have my wand. Screaming was useless. Plus, there's Dark Magic in the family, I don't doubt he'd use it. So I did it. Felt horrible. He tried to penetrate me afterwards but it didn't fit. He didn't want the family to find out from my crying face and decided to just finish in my mouth. I guess like father, like daughter." His deep breath was jagged, as if he had said all of it in one breath. His snuffle made him realise he had started crying at some point. He hated crying. Fucking hated it. Taught it was weak.

"You never told anyone...?" Blue eyes met brown for the first time since they sat down.

"No. You're the first." Not even Pandora. Reg loved her. She was his bestest friend. But he was too ashamed to admit what happened and saw no reason to expose himself. "My uncle told me no one would believe me, that I'd be ridiculed and get taken out of Hogwarts. Thanks for not making me feel bad about it..."

"Of course, love... I'm so sorry that happened to you... I'm here whenever you need to talk about it. About your feelings." Soft fingers cleaned the wetness from pink cheeks.

"Thanks, Jamie. But I'm not ready for that yet. I'll accept that hug, however..." His amazingly supportive and kind boyfriend opened his arms wide, wrapping them around the small body lovingly. He caressed jet black hairs, kissing that head right after.

"I'll always be here for you. And you don't have to worry about sex, alright? If we never do anything it's okay. I don't mind. Just want to be by your side." More tears fell. Although these ones were out of happiness, relief.

"I think I love you."

"I know I love you."