#I didn't do secret life because 1 I couldn't figure out a pose for them

[mars-ax]

MARS. POST THE DOODLE OF SCOTT AND CLEO CUDDLING AND MY LIFE IS YOURS

so I don't usually post doodles because I'm very self-conscious about their quality, but just for you harper

So that doodle was actually in a series of other doodles all in the theme of "literal sleeping together" because that's one of my favorite things ever, so I might as well put them all here then

[citrusandrottefruit]

Diagnosed with Hanahaki, a genetic autoimmune disease, as a child, Steve has learned to live with it. Along the way, he finds a family and falls in love with Eddie. He is never cured, but he lives.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

Being diagnosed as a child meant that Steve didn’t have to tell anyone about Hanahaki, because his parents were the ones managing everything related to his health, and anyone he might want to share this information with was another child, so he had no reason to. Because of all this, Steve didn’t develop any particularly effective methods of announcing that he was sick. His parents told his teachers, babysitters, or nannies. The hospital staff just had to read his medical records.

Being Mrs. Harrington's son taught Steve to be discreet, because he learned that letting other people know could be painful and embarrassing. A show of weakness, sometimes. A part of him so intimate, so vulnerable, so shameful, so frightening that he could never even bring himself to share it with Tommy or Carol.

So when he sat down across from Wayne, a week after he had talked to Eddie and had reintegrated himself into the Munsons’ daily lives, he wondered how to do that. Eddie, who had been watching him out of the corner of his eye, seemed so nervous that Wayne began to look between them, suspicious and curious. Steve figured he hadn’t asked anything yet because he wanted to let them talk first.

He also wondered if Wayne was expecting some kind of different news.

“Wayne,” Steve called, because that was what he had been instructed to call Wayne. “I told Eddie something last week, and I thought I should tell you, too.”

“You don’t owe me anything, son.”

Despite his words, Wayne’s face showed that he wanted to know. Besides, Steve disagreed. He couldn’t just insert himself so deeply into someone’s life without alerting them to the danger he posed.

“I have Hanahaki. It’s not something new, so it’s not like I’m going to drop dead at any minute, and it’s not like I’m learning how to deal with it. I’m fine, I have access to treatment and medication, and I’m not freaking out about it all.” He said it all at once, hoping that throwing out all the information without wasting any time would ensure that Wayne wouldn’t worry.

Eddie frowned and kept casting sidelong glances at Steve, though he also exchanged deep looks with Wayne. They had that ability, a bit like Steve’s with Robin, of communicating without saying a single word.

Steve’s ears felt like they were plugged with cotton, but he heard Wayne finally speak. It felt like ages had passed.

“Steve.” He hadn’t dared look directly at Wayne yet, but he couldn’t help but do just that when he heard the crack in his voice. 

After everything that had happened with Eddie just three and a half months ago, Steve was more than familiar with reading the pain and fear on Mr. Munson’s face. He hadn’t expected to be the cause of the same kind of expression.

“Are you really okay?” 

“Not my best moment, but yeah. I’ve got it under control now.” 

“What can I do? What can we,” he gestured between himself and Eddie, “do to help?”

“I… I guess just by being here.”

Wayne nodded silently. 

Steve figured he needed time to process everything and that he would want some answers, so he let the minutes pass while he tried to organize in his mind which parts of his life he would have to expose. The truth was that he wanted to keep it all to himself and pretend that everything was fine, but the doctors had been warning him for years that there would come a time when he could no longer pretend, that it would help if he didn't worry about keeping everything so secret, and that he could only have a normal life if he had more support.

He couldn't ask for any of this with a clear conscience if he didn't clarify at least a few points.

So he told him about how his mother developed Hanahaki first and how his parents made sure he got the best treatment possible and how his father organized Steve's finances into profitable investments so that he would always have some income even if he could no longer work.

“Is that all they did?”

The question took Steve by surprise and he didn’t know how to answer. His parents weren’t with him, they barely cared, and Steve didn’t even know for sure how his mother’s health was doing, even though the two were mirror images of each other, but Mr. Harrington had made a considerable effort for him. Granted, the money invested in Steve’s name was what was always meant for him, to pay for college, and granted that his parents didn’t think it was worth it for Steve to go to college, because he wasn’t smart and wouldn’t be able to manage his studies while working and taking care of his health. It wasn’t an extra gift, but it was a lot. It was much more than most people had.

His parents weren't sacrificing or giving up what was theirs, but they never denied Steve anything, so it was okay.

They had never been good at parenting. The way things were, Steve would most likely cause crisis after crisis for his mother, angering his father so much that he couldn't handle his wife, and in return, Steve would do the same for them. They would kill each other. Being apart would provide more stability than they would have together.

Despite their fragile bonds, the Harringtons had done what they could to keep Steve alive, and he wouldn't dare complain about it.

So Steve didn't answer, because he didn't want anyone to think he was convalescing from missing his parents, and he also didn't want to lie.

But that same night, as he and Eddie sat in the backyard, with four feet between them, Steve thought, "Why not?" and he spoke.

If he was going to pursue any relationship with Eddie, Eddie needed to know everything.

“I think my dad triggered Hanahaki on my mom,” he said suddenly, his tone flat and disinterested and almost too low. Eddie listened, because he was more attentive than ever to every sound Steve made. It was both scary and exciting.

Steve took advantage of the attention and said things he had never dared to say out loud before. About how Mrs. Harrington liked to pretend everything was fine, about how his parents were tight and traveled together all year long. About how he could expect a fifteen-minute phone call every month, except sometimes it was no more than five minutes, just to check in and see if he was still alive.

Eddie was so angry and indignant to hear this that Steve was happy and allowed himself to feel like he had to defend his parents. Because this time, he didn’t have to be the one fighting to validate all the hurt his parents had caused. Eddie was doing that on his own.

“They know I’m alive because they get updates on my health all the time. Sometimes they mention a procedure I’ve had. They call to hear from me that I’m alive.”

“I don’t like your parents,” Eddie muttered under his breath. “If you were mine, I’d be with you all the time.”

Steve smiled fondly.

“You are now.”

After that, the next conversation was with Joyce and Hopper. Both Eddie and Robin had volunteered to be there, but wanting to do it alone and away from the kids, he asked Eddie to go out with them and make sure they were distracted. 

Besides, as much as he wanted someone by his side, needing other people so much was exactly what he had been avoiding. 

So he ended up alone in the Byer-Hopper kitchen, under the watchful eye of an anxious and worried Joyce. She kept glancing over her shoulder at Steve as she paced around for no apparent reason, under the pretense of needing to prepare dinner even though she had already said that some groceries were missing and Hopper had gone to get them.

They made small talk as Steve helped chop some vegetables and grew increasingly restless, eager to get home and hug Eddie or Robin. Then he realized he had been thinking of the Munson residence as “home” and redirected his thoughts to imagine a quiet evening watching movies or walking around town (since he had started to feel more tired and weak, Steve had gained a greater appreciation for walking than ever before). 

The sound of the door opening followed by grunts and heavy footsteps caught his attention, and both Steve and Joyce turned to face Hopper. He stopped, scanning the entire room and craned his neck back toward the stairs, as alert as everyone always seemed to be after everything. 

“Steve came to visit.”

“The kids are with Munson.” Hopper grunted.

“Yeah, I wanted to talk to you two about something I’ll talk to them about later.”

“Do they want you to ask them for something?” Joyce asked, frowning. “I’m sorry if they dragged you into any of their plans, Steve.”

“No, no, it’s something I really want to talk about, I haven’t talked to them about any of this yet.”

“Well, do it.” Hopper encouraged.

Then, in what was very similar to the conversation with Wayne, Steve told him about Hanahaki and the treatment. He wasn't surprised by the tears or the hug from Joyce, but Hopper's hand on his shoulder, her broken voice, and his hasty exit were more than Steve had expected.

“Give him some time.” Joyce asked. “He’ll be back. You still have things to say, right?”

“Sort of, but I can come back later.”

“Would you prefer this? Come back later?”

He opened his mouth, not knowing how to respond to that. What he really wanted was to say it right away and leave, but Steve also wanted to respect their space, to give them time to think.

“I can come back later.”

Joyce didn’t answer, she just kept running her eyes all over Steve’s face. Then she sighed and gave him an awkward smile.

“Or we can keep cooking, come here. Help me organize the groceries, so we can continue.”

They didn’t have much time before Hopper returned, much more stoic than when he’d left.

“So, Steve. If I understand correctly, you’ve been sick for over 10 years.”

“Yes, sir.”

“In 1983, you were already sick.” Hopper pointed out the obvious, as if he were trying to steer the conversation somewhere specific. Steve nodded. “We’ve been to the hospital several times since then, and it’s been months since everything’s been back to normal. Why are we only hearing about this now?”

“I was stable. I still am, actually, but my rate of decline, even outside of acute flare-ups, has been worse. The daily symptoms, the things I feel even when I’m fine, have been more intense.” Steve explained, measuring his words as he spoke. “If the Ups… If something happens again, I don’t think I can be someone you can trust, because I won’t be able to protect the children.”

“Oh my Gosh, Steve.” Joyce covered her mouth and looked at the floor.

“It’s not that big of a deal, to be honest. It’s not like I’m going to die tomorrow.” He probably didn’t add. He probably wasn’t going to die any time soon. “I’m responding well to the treatment. Besides, that’s one of the reasons I wanted to talk to you two: the worry of administering Hanahaki while trying to hide it from other people doesn’t, uh, mix well with the treatment.”

“And this treatment. How are you paying for it? Do you have to have weekly sessions or something?” Hopper asked.

“No, I’m just on some medication, if any complications arise I’ll go to the hospital and find out what can be done. Other than that, I’ve been having monthly checkups for monitoring. And my parents. They’re paying for everything.”

“That’s less than the least those two could do.”

“Hop!” Joyce clapped him on the shoulder, and though he mumbled something inept that Steve assumed was an apology, he didn’t sound the least bit remorseful. He looked furious.

“Anyway,” Steve started again, “you don’t need to worry about that. I’m fine. What’s bothering you is the kids.” 

Hopper looked at him, alarmed. 

“The kids? What’s wrong with them?” 

“I need to tell them. Since you’re Will and El’s parents, and you’re important to the Party, I know you might have. Worries? Fears? With me being around them. It wouldn’t be easy for them if something happened to me, so I understand if you want me to give them some space.” 

“What are you talking about? Even if we decided to push you guys away, I’m sure they’d find a way to drag you back. They’d probably set up camp in your living room.” 

“We’d never do that, Steve, because we love you too, you know that, right?” Joyce asked as she approached, pulling him into a hug he hadn’t even prepared for yet. 

A knot in Steve’s chest loosened. 

That night, even though he had been invited to stay and have dinner, Steve returned to the apartment alone. He called Eddie and Robin, who kept asking where he was, and when he finally felt alone and at peace, he began to cry.

Tag list | @estrellami-1 @drips-and-drabbles15 @im-sam-fucking-winchester @wonderland-girl143-blog @eyehartart

[mimisempai]

Missing you comes in waves and tonight I'm drowning

Summary:

After seeing Loki disappear before his eyes and confined to the TVA because of the failed mission, Mobius decides to still believe in Loki and search for him. He witnesses the discussion between Sylvie and Loki on the train

Notes:

My theories on the method used by Mobius to locate Loki is probably very far-fetched and lacks technical truth, but that's not the most important point here, so I hope you'll forgive me for my short cuts. (I miss them together!)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/32162878

2008 words - Rating G

"Loki! Wait!"

Loki looked at him for a moment before stepping through the portal.

By the time they got there, it was too late Loki and the portal was gone.

"I knew he would betray us as soon as he could!" said one of the hunters right next to Mobius.

"Shut up!" shouted Mobius at him before returning to the TVA.

As he walked toward Ravonna's office, the same thoughts swirled over and over in his head.

Had Loki betrayed him! What were his plans? But worst of all, was he in danger?

He tried to think rationally.

Loki always said he was one step ahead, but Mobius knew that wasn't true. Loki was improvising. Loki was adapting. So reason told Mobius that this is what he had done.

That's when Mobius decided to do something he'd never done in his life at the TVA, he was going to bet on chaos. On the fact that Loki had chosen to follow the variant not only for his own sake but also because it was his mission.

Because Mobius could not imagine that what they had shared was nothing in the eyes of the god.

"Mobius! In my office!"

Ravonna... he was already imagining her reprimands, "I warned you" "he can't be trusted"...

As soon as he entered her office, she showed him a screen and just said, "Look!"

A scene showing the variant fighting in a hallway with the guards and Loki in the locker room retrieving his daggers then arriving at the place where the guards were eliminated.

Next scene Loki and the variant fighting, Loki trying to convince her to team up, at this point, despite the faith he has in him, Mobius could not determine if this is a way to stop her or get what he wants.

Then Rovenna arrives and the variant uses Loki as a hostage.

Mobius could not prevent a gasp.

Still on the screen, seeing that Rovenna is not persuaded, Loki grabs an object that opens a portal above them and he and the Variant disappear.

Mobius tried not to show his relief, but he saw that Rovenna was not fooled.

"So you still trust him?"

Mobius looked at her defiantly, "As long as I don't have concrete, real proof that he betrayed us, yes I’ll trust him!"

"Always the idealistic dreamer huh?"

Mobius didn't answer, Rovenna continued, "You're grounded here until I tell you otherwise. You can get out."

Once out, Mobius sat in a chair, held his head in his hands, and began to think. He was grounded, but there was nothing to stop him from trying to figure out where Loki was.

He just had to figure out how to locate him.

The difference was that now, thanks to Loki, he knew to look in the apocalypses, what he had to find now was the equivalent of that candy, something out of the ordinary, something anachronistic.

He stood up suddenly, he had found it!

He went to the office, where the screen that displayed all the nexuses was located.

"Casey! Come here!"

The younger man got up and joined him. Mobius spoke more softly, "Will you help me with a secret project?"

Casey, who had great respect for the man, nodded.

"Follow me."

They headed into the archive room. Mobius chose a table a little out of the way.

"You sit here. I'll be right back."

A few minutes later, he returned with a stack of files that he separated into two piles.

"In all these apocalypses, we need to find one where it mentions two Lokis variants and unusual magical acts."

"Got it!"

Mobius didn't know if his smoky theory would work out, but he didn't have much choice.

He couldn't help but think back to a similar scene a few days earlier, when Loki had fallen asleep. He had let his guard down in the presence of Mobius, so that meant something, didn't it?

He started to flip through the files.

"M-Mobius! I think I've got it!"

Casey was showing him a file, Lamentis-1 - 2077, a woman reports that two demons tried to attack her. One even allegedly posed as her deceased husband in order to get information.

Mobius could feel it in his bones. It was Loki and the Variant.

He was going to have to gamble on someone again.

"Casey. I need you to keep this a secret for a while longer. If Ravonna gets wind of this, I'm afraid she'll launch an assault and won't hesitate to eliminate Loki."

Casey nodded without taking time to think, "As long as you need Mobius."

Mobius was surprised that he didn't have to persuade Casey more than that.

After all, he seemed to be the good, loyal employee who never disobeyed.

Casey, seeing his reaction, added with a knowing smile, "You know, I like Loki too. He promised me he'd show me what a fish is and you know? The drink he took from me the other day, he bought me another one and apologized. A villain wouldn't take the time to do something like that right?"

Mobius's throat tightened. Casey was the first person other than himself to acknowledge that there was good in Loki.

"Thanks."

Casey nodded and returned to his desk.

Mobius headed straight for the video archive room. The advantage of being an agent of his rank was that he had unrestricted access to this section of the archives.

He searched through the shelves until he found the videos of Lamentis 1 in 2077.

He sat down in front of one of the small projectors provided for this purpose. He was going to start from the described scene that Casey had shown him.

After entering a few parameters, the screen lit up with Loki being blasted by an old woman.

The noise of the meteors that rained down around

Loki and the one who accompanied him, prevented Mobius from hearing what was being said.He pressed the fast-forward button until Loki and the girl, after some trouble to enter the train, found themselves in a box in the dining car.

He turned up the volume to hear their conversation.

He was amazed at how easily they seemed to converse, despite the jabs on both sides, and couldn't help a twinge of annoyance that he refused to recognize as jealousy.

The variant said to Loki, mockingly, "FYI, that wasn't even a plan."

"Oh, really?"

God how Mobius missed that cheeky attitude. Even when unmasked, Loki still had that irritating confidence.

The variant replied, "Plans have multiple steps. Dressing as a guard and getting on a train is just doing a thing."

She couldn't hold back a yawn.

Loki responded, "Oh, are you a bit tired? Feel free to, you know, get some rest."

One thing Mobius had realized and Casey had confirmed to him just before was that Loki cared more about others than he let on if you paid attention.

The variant grunted and replied, "I can't sleep in a place like this."

"You can't sleep on a train?"

The variant retorted, irritated, "No. I can't sleep around untrustworthy people."

Loki replied, still cheeky, "Oh, right. That's me?"

Fearing he might misinterpret what had been said, Mobius pressed rewind and let the scene play out before him.

The image of Loki nodding in agreement about not being able to sleep near people he couldn't trust was superimposed on the image of Loki sound asleep in his company.

He could not suppress the pang of his heart.

Loki trusted him, Loki considered him trustworthy.

While he was thinking, the video had continued and Loki was now talking about his mother.

Mobius had witnessed Loki's relationship with his mother and his devastation at the news of her death.

Loki's voice had become more hushed, with that hint of fragility he had whenever he spoke of her.

"She was, um... A Queen of Asgard. She was good. Purely decent."

Then the variant and Loki respectively provoked each other about the fact that they were adopted and Loki continued, "You know, when I was young, she'd do these little bits of magic for me. Like turn a flower into a frog or cast fireworks over the water. It all seemed impossible. But she told me that I'd be able to do it too because... Because I could do anything. You wanna see?"

Loki sets off tiny fireworks over his hand.

Mobius could not deny his feelings at that moment.

The sight of magic coming from Loki's hands, pure magic, was enchanting.

Loki continued, "She was the kinda person you'd want to believe in you."

Mobius could not help but whisper, "Loki, I believe in you."

For a few moments he didn't catch the conversation until it was audible again. Apparently they were talking about their love interests.

The variant asked Loki, "How about you? You're a prince. Must've been would-be-princesses or perhaps, another prince." She finished with a wink.

Loki, replied with a serious look, "A bit of both. I suspect the same as you. But, nothing ever..."

The variant finished his sentence, "real."

"Let me find you and I'll prove to you how real it is." Mobius didn't realize he was speaking aloud. He pushed fast-forward again.

The Variant had fallen asleep and Loki looked a little giddy.

Loki waved his hand and was back in his TVA agent costume.

He could wear the illusion of any outfit, and he chose this one. Why stay in these clothes?

Mobius really didn't want to be under any illusions, because how could he imagine that someone like Loki, a prince, a god, would want to claim a belonging to something like the TVA... to someone like Mobius?

Loki had started to dance and sing.

Mobius could not help but laugh. Then his laughter died down as Loki's song became more melancholic,

I stormsvarte fjell, jeg vandrer alene

Over isbreen tar jeg meg frem

I eplehagen står møyen den vene

og synger "når kommer du hjem?"

Men traner danser og fossene stanser

når hun synger, hun synger "kom hjem"

Then seeming to regain his spirits, Loki began to dance and sing happily again as if trying to prevent nostalgia from invading him.

When the music stopped, he joined the Variant and resumed his seat in front of him. Mobius managed to understand what they were saying to each other.

"What did you just sing to look so disturbed?"

Loki looked a little moved and answered him with the voice Mobius knew well, the one he used when he was serious, when he was sincere.

"It's Asgardian, it says:

In storm-black mountains, I wander alone

Over the glacier I make my way

In the apple garden stands the maiden fair and sings,

"When will you come home?"

Loki stopped, apparently moved, and the Variant simply said, "So there's a would-be-princess somewhere..."

Loki chuckled looking so sad before answering her, "I like metaphors you know, it's not a princess it's a prince, and I don't know if he's waiting for me or hoping to see me again, it's not even really my home, but..."

"But you'd like to believe that right?"

Loki nodded.

Mobius, didn't dare to believe that it was him that Loki was talking about, even though he couldn't stop the hope from rising up inside him.

The video continued, much more animated, after a wild fight, both jumped off the moving train and found themselves walking through a kind of desert towards the energy source they apparently needed to reactivate the tempad.

Mobius saw Loki suddenly stop, looking shocked. But Mobius was unable to hear what they were saying, the sound of the meteors again covering their voices.

Suddenly, Loki shouted louder, "But they don't know that!"

And they began to run.

Mobius could see that Loki was repeating something as he ran, an expression that Mobius had never seen on his face. Like he was worried. But he couldn't hear him. He zoomed in closer to try to read Loki's lips and finally succeeded.

Mobius.

_________

The whole serie here : The story of Loki and Mobius

Not beta'd I hope you enjoyed it 🥰

[tarlos-spain]

Flufftober Day 10 - Pillow fight

Fandom: 9-1-1

Pairing: Eddie Diaz/ Evan "Buck" Buckley

Characters: Eddie Diaz, Evan "Buck" Buckley, Christopher Diaz

After the storm

Chapter 8:

Chistopher never got up early, didn't go into his father's room without knocking and certainly didn't rush into his father's bed scaring him and Buck to death who were still sleeping after a very long shift.

It had been Eddie's idea for Buck to stay over.

"If it's okay with you, tomorrow, Sunday, after breakfast, we'll talk to Christopher and tell him about us."

The plan was easy, they would sleep in, have breakfast and he would tell him. Christopher didn't have to find out first.

But there he was jumping on his father's bed.

Fortunately they weren't naked. They were so exhausted from finishing the shift the night before, they had simply jumped into bed and fallen asleep.

"Buck, I knew you'd be here."

"Of course I'm here."

Buck shot a quick glance at Eddie for help in answering.

Christopher, however, beat them to it. He was too smart a kid to try to hide things from him or to take too long to figure it out.

"Have you slept in bed with Dad?"

"Ahm.... Yes because we were tired and fell asleep.

"Nah, you're dad's boyfriend right?"

Christopher laughed nervously and fell onto the bed.

He had found them out, there wasn't much either of them could do, other than admit it. By now everyone knew, everyone at work and Christopher, there was Maddie left who had probably already noticed and their respective parents.

For Buck it wasn't a problem, they hardly knew anything about his life for the last few years not that he was going to run and tell them he had a boyfriend or anything like that. Eddie knew his parents wouldn't look kindly on it, especially they would worry about Christopher; but he had already moved away with him, he had remade his life and they hadn't wanted any part of it. It wouldn't be now that they would pose a problem.

"Are you two boyfriends then?" Christopher asked again waiting for Buck and his father's reply.

"Well, boyfriends is a big word and we're still starting something..."

"You guys are boyfriend and girlfriend, that's great. I love it."

The boy continued to laugh happily.

So much so that they had been worried about how he was going to take it and he was the most excited about it.

"You are my two favorite people in the world. I love that you two are sweethearts, so Buck will spend all his free time at home with us."

"Hey, maybe we want a little alone time."

Christopher stared at them and widened his smile.

"Nah, we're going to spend all our time together."

"How about we have a cushion duel?" Buck proposed to him getting down on his knees on the bed with the pillow already in his hand. "If I win we make a schedule so we can get organized and I can spend time alone with your dad."

"And if I win, we're always together."

The battle began, Buck was letting himself win, he planned to let himself win and make things easy for Christopher, after all spending as much time as possible between the boy and Eddie was one of the best ideas anyone could have.

But Eddie decided to get in the middle of it and started hitting both of them with his cushion.

"That's cheating!" Christopher protested and jumped on his father, knocked him down on the bed and lifted the cushion. "Yes! The monster is down! Buck, the monster is down!"

Buck couldn't remember the last time he'd had such a good time just getting up, no thinking, no trouble, no worrying about anything.

He leaned over Eddie and smiled at him.

"Something tells me you're up against the wrong person, Diaz, need a little help?"

"How about we use the secret weapon against Christopher?"

A moment later, the two were trying to grab the boy on the bed to tickle him and Christopher's laughter came into the room.

What idiots they had been for thinking they were going to have any trouble telling Christopher about him. It had been the simplest thing in the world.