#I did not expect to write an entire wall of text for the spicy food question sdflksfls whoops

[lichfucker]

2, 7, 12, and 22 for Ingot~

2. what's their current hairstyle? has it changed? do they change it often?

ingot has long straight hair that he wears down and it’s pretty much always been that way lmao. the way his horns kind of hug the side of his head basically acts as like a headband holding the hair there so it’s not. the easiest thing in the world to style his hair any other way. that being said, though, while he was a soldier he wore it back in a low bun, and very rarely (like, only ever on dates w z’ress, and even then mostly not) he’ll tie it into a low ponytail or something, nothing fancy, just something a little different to mark the occasion. but 99% of the time it’s just down. ingot takes good care of his hair, he likes it the way it is

7. how would they react to eating something that was spicier than they expected it to be?

g-d it’s so funny bc ingot has +3 constitution but they fail con saves so often that like any little Bad Sensation makes them throw up, so I honestly have a hard time gauging what their tolerance for spice would be. like on the one hand we’ve got posh little dandy boy who grew up eating food specifically made to their exact tastes, but on the other hand we also have someone who canonically doesn’t wear coats in winter because their blood runs so hot that they’re not really affected by the weather. either way though I think they’d react the same way I do, which is to just cringe and grit their teeth and not mention it at all because they don’t want to make a whole Thing out of perhaps not being able to handle it (in my case particularly it’s bc I’m weenie and I never know how to rate my tolerance compared to others’ so I perpetually live in fear of commenting on how spicy something is and having everyone look at me like I’m insane; I think for ingot it’s less of an insecurity thing and more of a pride/stoicism thing)

12. what color would they paint their room? would there be a design on the ceiling?

I tried to imagine ingot exerting that level of aesthetic control over a space and my brain short-circuited, which I know sounds contradictory based on Everything Else about ingot, but when we were first planning on going to brogana, jd and I spent a lot of time talking about what brogan keep looked like, and I was struggling so hard to find any reference photos that felt like what ingot’s bedroom would have been like, because they were all so... grand and ornate in ways that just didn’t feel right? and then I realized that a) a lot of emphasis would have been placed on the idea that public spaces are meant to be precious but private spaces are meant to be practical (grand foyers and lavish parlors because they’re on display, versus plain and undecorated bedrooms because they are purely functional), and b) many many generations of brogans have all lived in this same keep-- plenty of people lived in ingot’s bedroom before it was his, and more inevitably will after, as well; even if he’d wanted to, the space was never his to decorate, it was always borrowed. and even his bedroom now, in a house gifted by the emperor, is a space borrowed. all I can imagine are plain white walls because that’s all ingot can imagine. if you asked him to pick a color that feels comfortable and safe, he couldn’t

and there is not a single g-ddamn universe in which ingot paints a design onto their ceiling

22. when they speak, do they have a default tone of voice? if yes, do they try to change it? why?

ingot has to try very hard not to sound very arrogant and aggressive with everything they say, which is difficult because they are both very arrogant and aggressive lmao. they’re insightful enough to know that by default everything they say sounds condescending, but they’re not charismatic enough to have... a lot of control over their tone without concerted effort. it doesn’t matter how many times ingot shoots their friends (read: z’ress) with arrows, because they know that the times they’ve done the most harm to the people they care about have been the times when they’ve just. spoken freely and without regard

[some-dr-writings]

Teruteru x M!Reader One-shot: Please Understand My Feelings!

Teruteru was so absolutely excited today! It was his birthday and there was only one thing he wanted. He wanted you! Well, that could be rephrased. To tell you he loved you! And he also wanted you. The two of you were instantly best friends the moment you met! You were hot, loved his cooking, and were overall an awesome and fun person to be with. Teruteru had tried confessing before but he always chickened out or turned it into another one of his innuendo laden remarks even when he was trying not to do that. But not today! He was going to confess to you no matter what it took! Even if it meant making the event into an extravagant show!... E-even if he had to outright just say it plainly. He’d rather just cook you something with “I love you” on the top. He wasn’t sure his heart could take saying it out loud. Even thinking about it sent his poor little heart a flutter beating faster and faster till Teru passed out. But hopefully it wouldn’t come to that. Maybe. Please.

Taking a deep breath, he pressed send on the text asking you to meet him in his lab for breakfast… At three in the morning. He needed time to cook and prepare. And he also couldn’t sleep a wink. He prepared an entire feast. He poured his soul into his dishes, needing everything to be absolutely perfect!

“Hanamura?” “Ah, Y/N. Perfect timing! Just take a seat and I’ll be out in a moment!” This was it; THIS WAS IT! He was finally going to confess to you and through his greatest passion no less! This was going to be the best confession! He had to take several trips in order to get all the dishes out to you. “What’s with the domes over everything?” You lightly scratched you head in confusion seeing most everything had a dome covering it. Teru normally only used those things when the food needed to be kept hot or needed moisture. In fact, because of the moisture Teru avoided the things since it could so easily ruin the food. “Should I remove them before the food get’s spoiled?” “No, no, no. The food’s fine. But if you simply can’t resist you can take a peek.” Though he said that, he wanted to see your reaction, but who was he to deny you satisfying your curiosity. Much to his delight you did in fact wait for him, tenderly smiling and giving him a small wave in greeting.

With flourish Teru removed the domes from each of the dishes revealing what was inside. Steamed rice in a heart shaped bowl with Natto in a heart shape on top, Miso soup with heart shaped tofu, eggs and bacon systematically placed to make a heart shape as well as the aebleskivers too, a German pancake drizzled in lemon, berries placed atop it spelling “I love you”, more berries spelling out his feelings atop French toast and pancakes and crapes and other such items. You gasped at the sight of it all. Everything glistened in a beautiful sheen, all the baked items were that perfect, crisp, golden-brown color. All the delectable smells melded together yet were still distinct making your mouth water from it all. Cutting a piece from the German pancake and French toast your ears tingled hearing that light crunch. You sighed and awed as the delectable tastes simply melted in your mouth and on your tongue. “This is amazing!” Your cheeks were sore from how much you were smiling.

Meanwhile Teru stared at you absolutely baffled. Did… did you not notice? But HOW!? “Uh, but don’t you notice anything about your breakfast today?” “Hmm? Well… I notice there’s a lot more than usual, and there’s lots of hearts and you wrote ‘I love you’ a few times, but… Ah, I guess I didn’t really notice since I was expecting it!” … WHAT!? D-did you know already he liked you!? For how long!? “Today’s your birthday! It’s important to tell yourself you love yourself today! And I can taste it as well! I’m glad you have so much passion for your wellbeing!”

In that moment Teru began to question his life choices and how those lead him to falling so hard for such a sweet and kind dolt to the point of finding this alarming yet endearing at the same time. All he could bring himself to do was gently pat you on the head as you eagerly enjoyed your meal.

Alright, so breakfast was a bust, but Teru had other ideas for how to confess to you! “Ah! Class is starting soon! We should get going. I’ll come back at break to clean up, alright? I can at least do that so you can just enjoy today and relax!” You quickly got up from your seat and made your way for the door. “Now, hold on. I don’t want you slaving away cleaning dishes on my birthday.” He pinned you to the wall or tried to. He just slapped his hands against the wall blocking your way. “Kabedon?... Hanamura I think you’re a little short for this.” “I-what? NO! Listen to me! I much rather have you all to myself today.” “… OH! Yeah, I’m cool with hanging out! But… I do have a birthday surprise I’m still preparing so I can’t be with you all day, but when I have free time, I’ll come find you! Now let’s get to class before we’re late.” … Perhaps Teru should have been a bit more specific in his wording. Oh well. If you were going to be spending most of the day with him, at least that gave him more opportunities to confess. Or at this rate just keep trying too.

In class Teru wrote ‘I love you, Y/n. Yours truly Teruteru Hanamura’ on a piece of paper and folded it into a paper plane. Then ever so carefully, he tossed it to you. “Hmm?” You examined the paper for a moment before noticing Teru was waving at you. You waved back before your attention was drawn back to the plane. Teru intently watched as you began writing on the page! Oh no. What were you going to say? Did you like him back, did you not? What were you going to say!? Then you tossed it back! Unfolding the page Teru realized you just filled out the math sheet and never looked at the back where his message was. He was going to attempt this again this time with a complexly blank page but Miss Yukizome noticed and put a stop to it.

Okay, something else! Instead Teru wrote you a letter pouring all his feeling onto the page! THIS had to work! “Y/N! I need you to read this right now!” “Huh? Okay!” Teru fidgeted as you took what felt to be forever and a day reading that letter. “You used the wrong ‘your’ and ‘you’re’ through the whole thing. You are missing a few commas on the fifth, sixth, twelfth, and eighteenth lines. And… the line where you call me a hot stallion, I think you mean to compare me to a hot stallion. Now if you excuse me, I have a phone call to make!” Before leaving you passed him the letter back.

… Maybe writing his feelings out was the problem! “Mioda! I need your help!”

Finding it difficult to hear her on the other line you put in ear buds and turned your volume up hoping that would help. Unfortunately, she was also in a crowd, so it only helped so much. As you exited the building you found a stage had been set up. Not even a moment later you got a text from Chiaki asking you to come to said stage. And so, you did. Still trying to make the call work.

You were incredibly confused seeing Ibuki, Chiaki, Nagito, Kazuichi and Teruteru on stage, everyone with an instrument of some sort except for Teru who stood before a microphone. They began to play something, but of course in that moment your special guest was at a crucial juncture and you had to help her with directions and finding landmarks. You texted Chiaki an apology saying you had to go and would likely be busy for a while.

Of course as you were walking away was when the heart shaped fireworks went off and Teru belted out his feelings in an impromptu speech.

Teru sighed in defeat, falling to his knees seeing you dash away. “Y/n, darlin’ why must you be so elusive, like making the perfect mix of spices for Mama’s sweet and spicy chicken skewers.” Kazuichi kneeled down beside Teru, lightly patting his back. “Sorry man. Maybe next time.” Chiaki placed down the bass guitar she held and took out her Gameboy. “Yeah. You haven’t lost any lives yet. Keep trying and you’ll get him to notice… eventually.” Kazuichi nervously scratched his cheek as he stood up. “Yeah, that guy’s always been oblivious. Even from the start.” “Yes, I knew that when I fell for him.” Teru took out his phone, looking though the notes for ideas he came up for confessing to you. “Thank you for trying to help me.” Seeing what the next plan was, he got to his feet reinvigorated. “Alright! There’s only so many hours left in the day; I better get started on my next plan!” “Wonderful!” Of course, Nagito had to speak. “Go Hanamura! With that blooming hope in your heart go after Y/N!” Before Nagito could go on another of his hope rants, Teruteru ran away.

As you were rounding the corner to your dorms Teru jumped out dressed in a white suit with a bouquet in hand. “Y/N, watch this video!” “H-huh? Uh, sure?” The video was about the language of flowers and their meanings. When the video was finished you found Teru kneeling on one knee. “Cool. Though I’m not sure you have to get a bouquet of flowers meaning ‘I love you’ to show me the video. And I think kneeling like that is bad for people’s posture. If you’ll excuse me, I need to get to my dorm to check my reservation.” All Teru could do was just stand there dumbfounded. “… HOW!?”

You hurriedly placed on your windbreaker as you slammed the door open. “Hanamura? What are you doing here? And with an umbrella?” “Y/N, it’s raining! Share this umbrella with me!” “What? But there’s not a cloud in the sky. Wait, then why is there rain?” “Just… if you’d like please share this umbrella with me.” “Uh…” You walked out into the precipitation and looked up. “Oh. Hanamura, it’s fine.” You then waved up at the dorm ceiling. “Hey! Souda! Could you turn off the water hose and stop pointing it over Hanamura? He thinks it’s raining!” After a moment Kazuichi face-palmed and dropped the hose. “Hanamura, I think this is a lost cause.” Then Nagito popped out of the window to his dorm room. “Just hold on to that beautiful hope inside you! I believe in you Hanamura!” “Uhh, anyway! Hanamura! Your birthday surprise is ready! Well more like on it’s way. But! Please, please, please, come with me! I promise you won’t regret it!” “… Sure. I’ll come with you.” “Heck yeah! C’mon! We’ve waisted enough time already, I’m already a little late!”

“Hurry, Hanamura! We’ll be late!” “I-I’m hurrying as fast as I can!” You took Teru’s hand and dragged him along at your breakneck speed. “We can’t miss the train! Hurry up!” “Train?”

“T-thank goodness. We got here in time.” You both collapsed onto the train seats, completely winded, desperately catching your breath. “Yay. We made it before rush hour.” You slumped in your seat, looking out the window at that gorgeous sunset. You so goofily smiled to yourself imagining Teru’s reaction to your gift. You just couldn’t wait. “Hey, Hanamura. You just as excited as I am? … Hmm?” You got no response. “Hanamura? HANAMURA!”

…

You sighed in relieved seeing him waking up. “Just in time, we’re almost at our stop!” “Huh? Wa-? What happened?” “Uh, once we were on the train you keeled over and started foaming at the mouth. But you seem okay now! I think. How are you feeling? Please be okay.” “Oh, no, no, darlin’ I’m fine.” He was snapped out of that haze realizing he accidently let his accent slip out! Hopefully you didn’t notice. “Ah, your accent!” Of course you notice that! OF COURSE!... At least you seemed happy to hear it.

Once you got off at your train platform you swiftly lead Teru to a car lot. “You rented a car?” “Yeah! I’ve been saving for months for this and other things, and even took driving lessons for this, but it’s worth it! C’mon! Get in! We can’t be late!” You dragged him in by the collar of his shirt, too excited to wait for him.

“This shouldn’t be a long trip, but if you want, you could turn on the radio.” Taking you up on your offer he flipped it on, hoping it could distract him from wondering where you were taking him. A farm for fresh ingredients? But you said it wasn’t far and you were still in the city. A love hotel perhaps! That’d be a dream come true! Before his mind could start to run wild, he noticed the song that was playing. Yuki no Hana, Snow Flower. A classic. Odd it was playing though since it wasn’t winter yet. The song was literally about watching the snowfall with a lover. “… Y/N.” “Yeah.” “This song reminds me of you.” “… I remind you of winter?” “No, the other part.” “… Uh… The coming of winter?” “No, not winter.” “OH! About helping one another through hard times! Always being together!” Teru was silent for a moment, just taking in that moment. “Yeah. That part.” You weren’t wrong… It was close enough. “I’d like to stay by your side too! You’re my best friend.”

…

Maybe the only way to get it though your thick skull was to just out right, out loud, say it. But the question was… could he bring himself to tell you so directly without chickening out like he had done in the past.

“An airport?” You giddily chuckled seeing Hanamura trying to puzzle out why the two of you were here of all places. Once you finally found a parking space, you immediately stepped out to make a call. You then lead Teru into the airport. You looked around, trying to figure out if you had missed her already. “Did we pass by already?” “Mama!? Is that you!?” Teru raced to the woman, giving her the tightest hug he could. “Teru, my baby!” “Mama! How are you here! What about the diner!?” She simply pointed to you, who was mumbling to yourself about how she said she’d be by the shops which was where you were. “Y/N.” “The little sweetie. He’s been planning this for months now. Saving up money for plane tickets, my hotel, and covering the payment I would have gotten from working. The dear even tried tracking down your brother and sister but there just wasn’t enough time before your birthday.” The woman gently pat your arm, finally getting your attention. “Huh-Oh! There you are ma’am! I thought we missed you. Ah, let me take your luggage! I’ll take it all to the car while you and your son catch up!” “… Y/N.” “Yeah, Hanamura? OH! I forgot! Happy birthday! That’s what you were expecting, right? Sorry? I got caught up in th-” “I love you so much.” You simply stared at Teru as a bright red dusted your cheeks. “You… you love me? Wait…” One could see the cogs turning in your head as your blush darkened and spread to the tips of your ears. “I’M SO SORRY! I DIDN’T REALIZE SOONER!” “Sweetie-” He held one of your hands in both of his. “YOU WERE TRYING TO TELL ME ALL DAY!” “Darlin’-” “YOU LITERALLY WROTE ‘I LOVE YOU’ IN BERRIES!” “Y/N-” I’M SO SORRY I DIDN’T NOTICE! HOW COULD I BE SO DUMB!? I’VE HAD A CRUSH ON YOU SINCE WE MET! I LOVE YOU AND I DIDN’T EVEN NOTICE YOU-… you love… me too…” You buried your ever-reddening face in your hands realizing what you just said. “… So Mama, this is my boyfriend, Y/N.” “H-hi, Ma’am.” Teruteru’s mother simply looked at you two happily yet with confusion evident in her eyes. “I thought you two were already boyfriends since you write so much about Y/N in your letters and how Y/N went to all the effort to get me here.” “M-Mama! I-I don’t write about him that much in my letters!” “Oh, my mistake, there’s some other sweetest, kindest, most selfless dope in the world you’ve been trying to confess to for the past few months?” “YOU’VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL ME FOR MONTHS!?”

This… was certainly not how Teru imagined getting together with you but thinking about it on the ride to the hotel you got for his mother. He wouldn’t have it any other way.

[morphituu]

Milagro

Chapter 19: Leonardo Makar Jakoby

Ch: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18

Note:  before you read this chapter, i'd like to share with you the song that helped shape and bring this piece of writing together, and if you have the patience i hope you'll take a listen and further understand the emotions i intended with this 💛

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The front door swung open faster than she intended, but Callie couldn’t stand to be under the glaring sun and heavy humidity a moment longer. Her locks were frizzed and sticking to her neck and shoulders, and sweat was lining her honey skin in droplets when she stepped into the cool house.

“Oh god, close the blinds,” she lamented, waddling through the kitchen to stick her flushed face in front of the freezer. “Next time I’ll just do laps around the house,”

“Yeah I can get on board with that,” Nick called from under the vent in the living room, his shirt left hanging on the back of the couch.

Her forehead bounced against her arm rested on the fridge, staring down at her stomach. “Please come out,” she groaned. “I can’t get any bigger,”

“We could try sex again,” Nick simpered, leering over his shoulder.

“I’m sweating,”

“We’re sweating,” Nick snorted.

When she at last stepped from the fridge, she brought with her a bowl of homemade deep red salsa that had sat long enough for the shimmering oil to be seen pooling at the top. She hastily and with little care unwound the nearly empty bag of tortilla chips on the counter, plunging a chip into the dip.  

“That’s gonna make you sweat more,” he bravely commented, joining her across the bar and dipping his own chip that piled pitifully compared to her towering bites.

She swayed and pulled air in harshly between her teeth as she chewed, an eye pinched shut and hands flailing.

“You’re gonna give yourself lethal heartburn,”

“If it gets him out I’ll deal with it,” she coughed, going in for another bite.

“You still have three days baby,” Nick reminded, wincing at his own bite of the searing salsa.

“I’m not taking any chances. I can do this,” she too reminded, her gaze harder than her words.

“No one is doubting that,”

“But everyone is expecting otherwise,” she murmured, snapping the lid back onto the jalapeño tupperware. She wouldn’t look up again, but he didn’t need to see her face to recognize the discouragement drooping her shoulders.

Nick chewed his last chip and dusted his hands of any crumbs before jogging around the wall and into the kitchen, immediately holding wrapping her in a tight embrace from behind. “I know you can do it,”

“I know you know,” she sighed, finally leaning back into his chest with her head on his shoulder.

He listened to her chew on the crunchy jalapeños and chips, his lips against her shoulder and rocking side to side. “He’s really going today,”

“Since this morning,” she added, moaning when he dragged his hands across her stomach, alleviating the insane itching that plagued her night and day. Her frame melted in his arms, tossing aside the last bite she couldn’t bare one more of with her mouth already feeling like fire.

When her fingers laced behind his neck, a low growl vibrated through his chest, his caresses wandering higher.

“I have time before I go in,” he groused.

“That walk wiped me out,” she sighed, curling her spine ever so slightly despite being ready for a nap. The implication alone got her blood boiling in a way she didn’t mind despite her wiser half protesting at anymore physical exertion.

“I’ll do the work,” he rumbled, angling her jaw to stop her low whine. “You just worry about enjoying it,”

“It’s gonna be work, you gotta help me get him out,” she murmured in defeat, her breath catching when he massaged a tender breast through the dress.

He chuckled into her hair, a burly arm supporting her up when two thick fingers slipped under her dress and panties. “I know what I’m doing.”

It was too good.

The haze she floated in, the fan blowing across her naked, spent body, the cold sheets she was lost in; the kisses she opened her eyes too when she felt Nick’s impression on the bed beside her.

It was all too good.

 “Time to go already?” she asked softly, her hands feeling his unbuttoned uniform shirt before her heavy eyes opened.

“Mhm,” he toned into the top of her breast. “It’s a half shift today,”

“You’ll be home for dinner?”

He nodded, exclaiming sorely once standing.

“Frijoladas?” she asked, rolling on her side with a pillow ready to stuff under her stomach.

“Oo, hell yeah,” he grinned, stepping into his slides. “You stay pregnant until I’m home,” he pointed, his tone grave.

“I think he’s too comfortable in there,”

“Good. Keep him in there until tomorrow,”

“Tomorrow?” her brows furrowed.

“It’s my day off,” he grinned cheekily.

“Don’t get shot,” she said into the pillow she embraced, breathing in Nick’s cologne.

“I’m too quick.” He teased, bouncing around a couple times to rile some giggles. With a final kiss shot her way, Nick was shuffling down the hall towards the door and grabbing his bag, then keys, and groaning against the assaulting summer heat once outside. It only made him want to slink back into the dark, cool room with Callie, but regardless of whether there was a c-section in three days or she managed to get Leo out beforehand, he had five days worth of time to spend with the two whenever he decided to make his debut.

Just the thought had Nick shaking his hands loose of the tremble they’d steadily maintained.

Everything was set and ready for his arrival, but counting down the minutes made the wait excruciating, and if Nick was being honest, he wanted him out weeks ago. The daily barrage of texts from friends and family asking is he here yet!? were not so much a pain, but hourly reminders that he had no control over his sons awaited birth, and that another day had gone by without him in his arms.

 Even if I’ve been fucking her three times a day, he thought bitterly.

He’d been promised from all directions that sex would do the trick, but all either had gained from it was funny walking and a sore dick, not to mention the few times where neither had actually came and they’d just flopped over one another in annoyance.

He pulled onto the road, the chilled air blasting across his face and chest that was already accumulating sweat.

Maybe he should bring home chili’s to eat with the dinner.

 Seeing as that's our last hope.

In the afternoon blaze that looked over LA, people were irritable and hollering at one another in traffic. Many drivers didn’t have the luxury of working AC in their old beaten cars, and sitting under the sun flared tempers of all races, especially humans and Orcs. He even found himself spitting harsh choices of words at particularly dumb drivers that only further congested on-ramps, and by the time he made it to the station, he could barely muster patient responses when the baratement of where’s the baby? came.

 Do you think I’d be here!? He wanted to shout, but he still needed a job to come back to.

“Still!?” Sergey asked in honest shock, feeling Nick’s exhaustion bone deep when he shook his head slowly. “You know I’ve heard-”

“Whatever you’ve heard we’ve already tried,” he groaned, the pair making their way to the lockers.

“Even-”

“Don’t say spicy foods,” Nick snapped.

Sergey’s nose scrunched. “For someone who’s expecting the miracle of life you’re awfully cranky,”

“I’m not cranky,” Nick shoved his partner into an empty locker, his shoulder making loud contact with the metal door, but he laughed it off. “I’m impatient,”

“Why not just take off the extra days before it happens?” Sergey intoned.

“Over-time pay, that’s why.” Nick smirked, pulling his lock off the locker door.

↠

She flung out another onesie so the feet popped out, holding it up to decide whether this one was to hang or fold, and decided it would be stuffed into his already packed dresser.

For weeks now Leo’s closet had been bursting at the bolts with clothes and blankets and everything else that came with a baby; so much that Callie wouldn’t actually need to buy any clothes until he was at least one, but that didn’t stop her, or Nick from plucking cute sets from racks and all the assortments of socks possible, not to mention beanies.

She traced the pads of her fingers along the baby blue designs lining a hooded onesie, grinning to herself.

Nick had picked this one, going on about how easily his little melon would get cold.

Callie placed it in the pile to be hung up, and if need be, she’d take a few out to make sure it found its place amongst the others. Her brows furrowed the longer she stared, starting to question if it should tag along in the hospital bag. The rooms did get awfully chilly.

“I’ll come back to you,” she decided quietly, leaning down to grab the next article of Leo’s clothing from the basket between her feet.

Though her eyes remained trained on the TV muttering lowly in the living room, she’d completely retreated back into her thoughts when that first cramp of the day hit, but when it continued long enough for her to really evaluate its depth, she realized this one was… different.

The Braxton Hicks that had tormented her for months were sharp, often radiating down into her pelvis like minor shots of electricity. They’d subside quickly before the next one came, but this cramp was intimidating. It wrapped around her entire stomach, stretching to her lower back, and this first one wasn’t even painful. It was low, and lasting, as if giving a stern warning about what was to come, but wouldn’t pain come with something like this?

She exhaled slowly when it finally ended at thirty-six seconds, ames still outstretched and holding a little sweater while deciding upon her next move.

Callie looked down slowly as if she expected something to lunge up at her from below, but all was the same.

Leo swirled a few times, but he’d been calm since the previous day, even when Nick cooed lovingly to him to purposely evoke some kicks and shoves.

She glanced at her phone, noting the time.

“Alright then,” she cleared her throat, flinging the sweater out flat before piling it on the tabletop. She still glanced around while continuing to fold and sort, listening and waiting for something else to come, but it wasn’t until about twenty minutes later that she felt it again, and this time she had enough sense to press a hand to her belly and actually feel the contract-

 No, she shook her head, continuing on with her laundry through this one. It was uncomfortable, but manageable, and definitely not that , she decided. It just didn’t start like that… did it?

When this one ended at twenty-two seconds, she scoffed.

“Almost had me there,” she mumbled, carefully piling the clothing on the table surface.

The third one was… annoying. It almost made her grip the table in support, but she bullied the discomfort aside and told it to fuck off. It radiated deep from within her gut like a period cramp, which didn’t help convince herself it wasn’t what she thought.

When the fourth one came, her attention to the ‘cramps’ had increased, and with her palms pressing into the tops of her knees, she straightened her back and ground her teeth, but sitting through them only generated more intensity.

But by the time the fifth one came, her leg was bouncing high and though she tried, she couldn’t help but cringe. The severity had grown more than she could’ve expected so rapidly, but forcing herself to move through them kept her from panicking. Folding laundry was the last thing she wanted to be doing now, but she also knew if she’d simply sat there with her undivided attention on this, she’d call Nick and likely take a ride to the hospital for false labor.

So she leaned back in her chair after throwing a pair of little pants back into the basket, holding her wrist against her forehead as she waited for this one to stop. Her skin was warming up, her heart hammering between her ribs.

Tightening her thighs only brought more misery when she tried to cross her ankles, and her palms fell over her eyes when it finally subsided. Callie exhaled hard, pushing her loose hair back and the basket away with her foot. No way she could concentrate on that. Her head lolled to the side when looking at her phone, debating heatedly within herself to call Nick. Her fingers tapped against the back of her hand atop her head as she stared at it, reaching after a few moments to swipe the screen up.

“No!” she snapped, tossing the phone down. “This isn’t it,”

Callie rose then, straining and following her stomach into standing before waddling to the kitchen. Her actions were unprecise when reaching into the fridge for a water, cranking the cap off angrily. She drank it purposefully, as if giving her body water would mean she was right and this was just a weird form of dehydration, or something.

“Mhm, mhm,” she went on as she gulped, a hand on her hip and rocking side to side.

But here came another one.

“Chinga su madre-” she sputtered, slapping the bottle down on the counter and bending forward. “Oh fuck me,” she forced out, leaning onto her knees as she continued to rock side to side through the harsh tightening. With every one that passed, the vigor that matched a charlie horses rapid incapacitation grew, and it brought back vivid recollections of the time she laid withering away in Nick’s arms as the onslaught of premature labor defeated her.

“No,” she straightened, exclaiming when her body gave her back a bigger no. Bowed over and down against her knees she went, puffing out a few quick breaths before slowly rising this time.

Her steps were cautious, one hand on her stomach while the other traced counter tops or walls, hovering to the back of a chair so she could gather the clothes that needed to be put away. By the time she made it to Leo’s room with arms full of fragrant, clean outfits, it had died down, but now came the soreness after them. Each step was coupled with sharp stabs that landed at her lower stomach and groin, bringing forth hard breaths from between her teeth.

She pushed the door open with her elbow, padding carefully across the plastic laid out over the carpet in preparation to paint the room, but now she feared it was too late for last minute projects such as this.

The clothes to be hung were draped over the crib until after she finished stuffing the folded clothes into the drawers, shoving aside the abundance of socks to make room for even more while counting her breaths, in through the nose, out through the mouth.

“Get in there!” she whined lowly, shoving the drawer closed so she could move on.

Her urgency to finish wasn’t farfetched; just as she’d reached for the last of the outfits to hang, she instead found herself leaning against the crib, her forehead landing on her forearm and doubt melting away under the fervor of this one.

Deep breaths did nothing, nor did squatting which had been sworn up and down on that it worked, but only resulted in her stuck down there, hanging onto the bars of the crib and mashing her teeth together through the physical torment that stifled her breaths. The duration didn’t even matter anymore, because these were far from normal Braxton Hicks.

Callie laughed to herself as the contraction died down enough to pull herself back up, her grip remaining steadfast on the crib until she knew she could walk without swaying. Her eyes cut down to her stomach, her bottom lip starting to tremble.

“I told your dad I’d wait until tomorrow,” she breathed, her voice breaking.

All week she’d done all she could to start this, to meet her son and at last hold him, but now she was alone in his room and terror was her only companion. How did she end up questioning her own capability when she’d done nothing but tell everyone how able and ready she was for this? How did doubt always find its way in?

 I need Nick. She needed her rock.

It was time to finally, finally meet their son, no matter how prepared she thought she was or how terribly she shook now as the realization that nothing could truly prepare her for this cast over her like a shadow.

Callie nodded, her eyes sliding shut and taking a slow breath in, then letting it out even slower. “Okay,” she exhaled, stepping warily from the crib and reaching for the dresser beside the door.

Her hand landed on the door frame the moment she felt it run down her leg.

“Oh my god,” she exclaimed when the warm fluid kept coming, pooling in the plastic around her bare feet. It’s sickly sweet odor was unpleasant, as was the shocking amount. Her hand shook when touching between her thighs, observing the shimmering liquid on her fingertips.

“Oh-” she gasped, laughing again. “Okay, okay,” Callie inhaled, sights set on the table in the dining room when she took another step.

But the world pulled out from under her, and the back of her head cracking against the floor was heard before everything was felt. The shock to her spine, the next contraction, her skull starting pound so loudly she could see it. Her hands lifted weakly, but they completely missed, folding heavy against the carpet beside her head.

But the contraction… it was so dull now as her world started to close, and her bent knees slid out in her own puddle of amniotic fluid she was stretched in.

“Ni…” she breathed weakly. Her arms were unable to lift again, the throbbing in her skull too mighty to fight.

A hard roll of shivers shot up his spine, shimmying his shoulders and shaking his head.

“Is the AC too strong?” Sergey asked, reaching to turn the dial.

“Nah, I just got a shiver,” Nick mumbled, rolling his shoulders again. He’d knocked loose that one, but what was this agitation that wouldn’t lift? It had come to a simmer in his belly, leaving him restless and uncomfortable no matter how he shifted in the seat.

He glanced around, jumping between passing faces and buildings, even scenting the air inside the car inconspicuously to see if some threatening scent had wafted in through the vents, but nothing explained the discomfort he felt.

It was irritating and only sank farther into his gut, heavy like stones.

“Ugh,” he groaned, moving around again.

“Tummy troubles?” Sergey played, hiding his smirk.

“Shut up,” Nick laughed off, but his grin vanished upon pulling out his phone. His thumbs flew over the screen, shooting a quick message to Callie.

 Gotta cover all your bases.

Consciousness came back to her like a kick to the jaw.

It rang behind her eyes, thundering against her temples. The sweat that had broken out across her body mimicked that of a fever dream, but her thoughts were crystal clear as she came back. The weight of her limbs was substantial, barely mustering the energy to hold her pounding head and bend her knees-

The shout that cracked in her throat was stifled late, far into the fast moving contraction gripping her frame, leaving her gasping and curling onto her side.

 That’s right, she was in labor. Active labor.

Callie pushed her upper half up, her hand sliding in the amniotic fluid pooled beneath her. She was rigid in pain, a shaking breath just moments away from becoming a shout. There was no counting, no more rocking side to side through it. There was only the suffocating wrath wrapping around her midsection like a suffocating corset, curling her neck back as she bared her teeth to the ceiling in agony.

At last it started to ebb away, leaving her spent and heaving into her palm before smoothing back her sweaty hair.

She wanted to lay back down, even being soaked in sweat and fluids with a throbbing skull. A migraine would be an easier foe to fight; at least then she wouldn’t be so dizzy she couldn’t even stand to keep her eyes open. But she couldn’t fall back into the quiet darkness. She had to bear the static in her vision and the hot tears that sprung before them.

This couldn’t end here.

“Go get your phone,” she gnarled, looking up at the door frame.

Her limbs shook something awful after finally pulling herself onto her feet, the amniotic fluid continuing to trickle down her inner thighs. Every step was a gamble, but with wet handprints left on the walls and a small trail behind her in the carpet, she made it to the table by the time another contraction was coming.

Her hands slid harshly across the table surface, knocking over clothes and mail, but her frantic searching didn’t yield her phone amongst the clutter.

“No no no-” she cried, gasping when it again constricted her midsection like an angry fist. She landed in the chair, her head flinging over the backrest and bawling into her hands as it’s fury kicked back into high gear.

The seconds felt slower than before as they ticked by endlessly, her legs kicking helplessly until she curled forward and crawled onto her knees and elbows that burned against the carpet.

 Breathe in- out, breathe- breathe in-

 It was impossible. Anything was. The only thing she wanted was to scream, but the floor smothered those. Loud grunts ripped from her throat, the dress clinging to her body like a wet sheet. Trying to form words in hopes she could calm herself down was futile when she couldn’t make it through a full breath without shouting, and as long as she was stuck there on the floor, she couldn’t find her phone.

It surely hadn’t even been a full minute since the last time he checked his phone, but he still looked again anyways, chuffing when there was no response from Callie.

Nick shifted to lean on his other foot, arms crossed and back burning under the glaring sun while stood in full uniform at the center of a lawn listening with only half his concentration to Sergey as he took the reins on this call. It was probably best that way too. If Nick had to deal with this stout man screaming about his lawn, he’d likely shove him into one of the many trash cans lining his yard.

So instead he cracked his neck, trying to ignore the sweat collecting across his scalp and gave in to checking his phone once again, but still, nothing.

Nick exhaled with another adjustment of the kevlar vest, hoping to alleviate the tightening of his chest.

Making it back to the table to again look for her phone hadn’t only been difficult, but a test of her willpower to remain standing when the contractions kept coming and strengthening enough to at first keep her on the floor for some time. She’d long since pushed her soaked panties down her legs, but was fearful if she reached down, she’d be faced with the top of Leo’s head and still no way to call for help. The thought of wobbling her way out of the house was quickly tossed; all their neighbors were busy singles or couples that were rarely home, and she sure as hell couldn’t just walk outside and scream.

So now she was upright again, even going as far as to unfold some of the clothing that it maybe could’ve been hiding between, but her thorough search did not produce the phone.

A few times she could’ve sworn she’d heard it vibrate somewhere, and when it went unfound she started to question her sanity. She did just crack her head against the floor and still struggled to keep her eyes open; it could be right under her nose and just couldn’t see it.

Callie’s hand flew over her eyes when she felt the fresh burning of tears, a weak sob building in the back of her throat. Between contractions she’d try to remind herself to relax, not to overexert herself more than she was already doing, but once the pain was no longer occupying every fiber of attention, she was left with this crippling fear.

Leo’s perfectly planned birth had suddenly been yanked out from under her in a matter of seconds, and now she was here, stranded and alone in the middle of her own labor that was completely out of her control. All the terrible outcomes she’d been warned of were suddenly so plausible; she could be losing another baby right now and she just didn’t know it yet.

Was labor supposed to hurt like this? It was so close to what it had felt like the first time during Tikka’s battle- so was she dying? Was Leo!?

There was no one to ask as she sobbed, leaned against the table with weak knees and wailing into bunched up laundry as another contraction fired up.

They were starting to last longer, which gave them more power without even really intensifying. Every one dragged on for eternity; it terrified her thinking of this going on for hours when she’d look to the clock above the bar and face that it’d only been a mere hour since first coming to.

Would Leo even have that much time?  

She steadied herself against the edge of the table, pulling her messy wet hair from her neck and face to fashion into a neater bun.

I’ve had many patients who’ve tried delivering vaginally and the baby’s become stuck in the pelvis because of their size.

Her stomach that had decreased in size since her water broke had been still; Leo had been quiet through all of this, not even a small foot to jab into her ribs like he normally did when she moved around too much, and she knew why. He was slowly moving down with every tight squeeze, coming closer to the end of his journey, but Callie didn’t know how she could ensure that being here.

She looked up, scanning the living and dining room.

Would this be enough to bring him into the world?

These walls had seen her grieve the loss of babies before; missed opportunities of a family and little laughs. Would they witness life this time?

Callie’s face hardened, nodding to herself with quickening breaths.

“I can do this,” she panted, tears brimming her eyes. “I can do this,”

Without Nick?

She wiped her eyes crudely, stopping hard when another contraction buckled her knees. The basket flipped it’s contents out before her alongside a curse, but through her own spitting profanities, she heard a soft thump , then the hum of her phone vibrating beside her hand, hidden under a small shirt. Her laughter was hysteric as she clawed for it, pressing it against her sweaty forehead and sobbing. When she could look at the multitudes of messages Nick had sent, she brought her face to the sky, thanking whoever had been passing by for showing mercy.

Cal answer me please

He sent the text with a hard press to his screen, the phone shoving back into his pocket as he made his way back to Sergey and the stout man who’d still kept hollering, but was now going to be dealt with a handful of tickets he’d accumulated after a quick sweep of his premises revealed he was the man who someone had called about.

Although at this point it wouldn’t help, Nick still took a cautionary breath while making his way across the lawn. He was a few insults away from slugging the middle aged man and calling it self defense, but Nick couldn’t trust himself not to concuss him if given the chance.

The strong vibration of his phone against his thigh completely turned him around, raising a hand to Sergey as he answered Callie’s call he’d waited desperately for.

“I texted you like a hundred-”

“Nick come home Leo’s coming!” she gasped harshly into the call.

It was what he’d feared had been happening the entire time his texts and calls had gone unanswered. There’d been days she did this; usually it was because of a nap or showering, sometimes forgetting her phone in the kitchen, but today, it wasn’t the heat that made his skin sweat, and it wasn’t his uniform that felt too tight around him. The discomfort had been under his skin, building deep down in his gut as the time dragged by. He’d known it all along, but couldn’t accept it until now.

He shouted something at Sergey, but to know if he understood him would go unconfirmed. Nick couldn’t even hear himself above the instant pounding in his ears, his sprint back to the cruiser and jumping behind the wheel all a blur, his voice shaking when he told Callie he was already driving.

The sirens stayed blaring the race across town, slamming his palm against the horn when the inane didn’t know better to get out of his way, because he’d push cars aside with his own if they interfered with this. What they’d been waiting years for, what he’d had nightmares and daydreams about, what he was so ready to protect.

It left him in disbelief while he drove wildly through the streets- surely to face harsh criticism once he’d returned to work- that in this moment, he felt no fear over meeting his son. It was only bubbling excitement to soon have all his questions answered, to finally touch the feet that kicked mightily when he heard his father's voice.

Nick’s hand covered the wide smile that spanned across his face, an equally insane stream of laughter erupting as the understanding fully dawned on him, and with that, the fear returned, too.

He was about to be a father for real, now.

By the time he was screeching around the last turn to the home stretch to their house, he’d composed himself and silenced the laughter he knew she didn’t need to be dealing with right now. By that phone call alone he could tell she was probably in hysterics, but why had she taken so long to reply then?

The sirens had also been killed before coming to a shrieking halt in the driveway, not even bothering to close his door before sprinting across the lawn.

He swung the door open so hard it bounced against the wall. “CAL!?”

“Over here,” came her weak call, and he again didn’t bother with the door before following her voice to the dining room where she was slumped in a chair and fanning her cheeks with an envelope.

“Are you okay? Are you alright?” he implored, squatting down to hold her face that was flushed and sweaty.

“My water broke all over his room and I slipped and hit my head,” she pouted, hot tears falling down her cheeks.

“Wha-” he choked, quickly standing to move her hair apart and check where she said it had smacked against the floor. Thankfully there was only a small abrasion that barely bled, but after going on to tell him how she lost consciousness and was sensitive to light, he knew there was even more reason to hurry.

“Leo’s bags,” she pointed, moving to hoist herself up.

“Hell no,” Nick scolded, easily scooping her up bridal style. “You’ll sit in the cruiser and I’ll get his stuff,” he was already walking her towards the door, taking the moment to kiss the top of her head when it rested tiredly against his chest. The exhaustion she must’ve been feeling was probably crippling based solely on her limp movements and weak voice.

Another contraction was starting when she was placed in the seat, but Nick moved faster than before when she waved him back into the house hurriedly, gripping the roof handle and arching against her seat. It was only a matter of seconds before he returned and was throwing all their bags into the trunk and himself back behind the wheel and they were off with the sirens blasting again.

Surely another harsh lashing was to come from that misuse, but this was worth it.

He didn’t know what to say or ask when she squeezed his hand like a vice, her legs straightening like a board and smacking her thigh repeatedly as she did her best to ride the contractions out silently. A few loud cries made their way from her throat still, then a soft apology that Nick would insist wasn’t needed.

He’d hold her face and kiss her cheeks when they stopped in traffic and Callie urged him to turn the sirens off when they did nothing to move the congested lanes no one could budge from, but it pained him to see her in such agony when they split her down the middle.

“W-what can I do?” he asked, fighting to keep his focus on her and the traffic inching forward.

“Nothing,” she gasped, her head lolling to look at him. “But it’s okay baby, just concentrate on the road,” she breathed, both of her hands securing around his. The sincerity in her big, tired eyes was there, but so was anxiety. Could he even tell if she was going to swing into one in this state?

“Talk to me,” she grunted while positioning herself in the seat. “Did we agree on what color he’d be?” she smiled.

He laughed nervously, a hand on the wheel and another on her stomach while her body was calm. It was so hard now, and if he wasn’t mistaken, even a little smaller. “I think we said mostly you with freckles of my color,”

She laughed, wincing. “I don’t think he’ll have hair,”

“I think he will. Maybe pointed ears,” Nick glanced at her, his smile fading when her face started to tighten again.

“And tusks-” she got out before her hand slapped against his arm to grip, this time wiggling onto her side to press her face into the seat.

It was another hour before the hospital was finally in sight, and for the first time in their relationship, Callie had been the one to leave bruises on his arm. Nick this time would take full advantage of being a cop; he could leave the cruiser parked right in front for as long as needed and no one could do anything about it.

“Ready?” Nick asked after darting around to her side with the bags looped around his shoulders and chest. His vest and belt had since been removed; they were only an annoyance at this point.

Callie’s response wasn’t immediate, and it wasn’t entirely sure, either. Although she nodded, the tears in her eyes and tremble of her chin revealed to him the fear she’d tried hiding up to this point. All the times she’d told him, herself, everyone that she could do this, she was still questioning herself in the moment. All this time she’d done her best to bury that dread, but now facing the question anew, could she do this?

A small team of nurses had come out with a wheelchair after spotting exactly what was going down and Callie was transferred from from his arms to the seat, his hand lingering in hers until he was forced to follow behind.

Her intake was quick; apparently your water breaking got you a spot right to the front of the line in the maternity wing, but just as they’d given Callie a bed and IV with the promise of rest, an exam to verify what stage she was at had her cursing just as loudly as she did during a contraction. Nick’s fingertips turned white under her grip, watching in horror as the attending dove knuckle-deep to examine her.

“Okay my love,” the attending stood, pulling her gloves off. “You’re at seven, so almost there. Did you want an epidural?”

“No,” Callie snapped. “I’m doing it natural,”

“That’s fine, but know we don’t give them after a certain point so we don’t slow down labor. Who is your OB?”

“Sangui,”

“We’ll page her, I think she’s here today, actually,” she jotted down in her little notepad she’d brought forth from her chest pocket, a few strands of hair loose around her eyes. “Okay, sit tight and we’ll be back,” she smiled, squeezing Callie’s foot before leaving with the nurse.

“Hey,” Nick scooted back beside her, wiping his thumbs across her brow and looking into her tired eyes. “How’re you doing? What can I do?” he asked in soft tones, kissing her gently when she shook her head.

“Tell me I’m gonna be okay,” she croaked, hanging onto his wrist.

“You’re definitely gonna be okay, both of you are,” he reassured, pressing his forehead to hers when she closed her eyes and nodded, soaking in his confidence.

Now out of her soaked dress, the crisp hospital gown actually felt nice on her hot skin, as did the cold sheets of the bed, at least until she was rolling onto her hands and knees as another contraction roared to life. Callie cried from the misery in her lower back, unable to remain still or even lay down when it wrapped around her.

Between sprints, Nick, although feeling like more of a nuisance than actual help, spooned ice chips into her mouth and pressed forcefully against her lower back when she begged for some kind of reprieve, moving on to carry all her weight when she hung in his hold after deciding to stand and walk around; that only lasted a half lap around the room. It was an awkward way to hold her up like this, with his hands clasped against shoulder blades and forearms under her armpits, but it seemed the way she hung deadweight helped ease some of the insane force across her body.

Until they were taken upstairs to a more appropriate room for her delivery, Callie bit and smothered herself through the pain, leaning over into the bedding to scream instead of trying to walk and breathe through it like the nurses so urged. Sometimes it was the mental strain that needed to be eased.

But even then the allure of pain meds grew as the time drew on.

She walked and bounced on the exercise ball when they said it would help speed labor along, but either of those became impossible as the contractions only grew closer. There wasn’t enough time to catch her breath before the next one came barreling down, and within another hour, she couldn’t stand to be touched.

Laying down was murder, but so was standing up.

She stopped Nick everytime he urged to call Rosie or his mom, telling him he wasn’t allowed to until Leo was out. Knowing my luck this will all be false labor, she had groaned.

She wanted to rip off the noisy monitors banded around her distended waist, but hearing Leo’s heartbeat thunder through the speakers reminded her of what was to come after all of this, that she knew as soon as she saw him, all of this would be worth it.

So she grit her teeth and clung to Nick when the pain came, her nails digging into his arms and shoulders, but he didn’t let out a peep of discomfort. In the moments she was free of misery that left her breathless, he held her against his chest and kissed her steamy cheeks, wiping away the sweat dotted across her forehead. He only told her how strong and capable she was, but never asked her to keep fighting through the pain. He didn’t want her to think she had to break herself over this; that it was okay to ask for pain relief if it was easier on her already strained body.

Callie grunted against his chest, her knees propped apart with a couple pillows. She’d given up trying to find comfort with the ten pillows that only made her hotter, and although Nick was a heater of his own, he came with big hands that massaged her miserable back.

“Do I need to move?” he asked, starting to pull his shoulder from underneath her head.

“No,” she grunted, rolling her onto her back. ”I gotta go to the bathroom,”

The heavy door to their room opened, and at last Dr. Sangui came in with hands clasped and a warm smile. “What ever got you here needs to be relayed so I can share the secret with the other a hundred moms desperate to pop their babies out,”

“Homemade salsa,” Nick grinned.

“Oh, well some of them are out of luck then. How’re you doing Callie?”

“I have a lot of pressure on my butt,” Callie frowned tiredly.

“Well let’s do a quick check here then,” she moved to grab gloves from off the walls. “When was your last one?”

“‘Bout an hour ago,” Nick answered, already offering his hand after Callie slid fully onto her back and spread her knees.

“And you were seven then?” she asked, apologizing softly when Callie tensed. She still nodded through it, this one not anywhere as bad as before.

“Well, get ready for the last stretch,” she looked up at the nervous couple. “It’s time to start pushing,”

Callie’s expression worried, her head dropping back with a hand rested against her chest and the other in Nick’s grasp.

“Hey,” he called softly, stopping her before she walked into that storm. “You can do this, baby,”

She nodded with him, eyes glossy. “I can do this,”

“You can, you’re finally gonna see him,” Nick’s voice wavered, but he took the opportunity to kiss her knuckles before leaning down to kiss her, reassuring her as many times as needed.

The staff was a blur around them, setting up trays at her feet and dimming the lights to make way for the blinding one above her. Gowns were draped over scrubs and Callie’s bed was formed until she was upright with one foot in a stirrup and another in Nick’s hold, his thumb caressing her knee comfortingly.

“Alright hun, why don’t you give me one good push to see where we’re starting,” Dr. Sangui smiled from behind her mask.

Callie nodded, her chin touching her chest when she pushed, whimpering at the immediate growth in pressure.

“Mom’s a good pusher, let’s set up quickly,” she called back to her staff cheerily, smoothing down the blue mats between herself and Callie.

It was a small boost to her confidence, but one she’d take nonetheless.

She watched them finish laying the blankets over the warmed tray and the scale beside it, the stethoscopes ready around their necks and bulbs prepared to be used. She didn’t dare examine the tray of scalpels and head clamps within Dr. Sangui’s reach; she couldn’t concentrate on that possibly.

Callie’s knees started to tighten. “I’m gonna have another one,” she groaned, her toes curling.

“Okay Callie, when you feel it, that’s time to push, alright? Push right into your bottom like you’re poopin’,”  she instructed, scooting closer between her feet.

Her hold adjusted around Nick’s wrist, looking up at him, searching.

 I love you, he mouthed, grimacing when there was only a second of her bright smile before it was time.

She pushed with every fiber of strength she had left in her spent body. Until her face was red and they said rest, she pushed even if it felt like her middle was splitting open.

 Just go just go just go! She screamed internally, desperate to move her mind around the torture, but everything was pain, and she felt every second of it. Every twist Leo made in her pelvis, she felt. Every inch he moved farther down between her hips; at one point she stressed her hips could dislocate, but was only told to keep pushing.

The breaks between the pushes were still agonizing. The pressure was that of the kind around your skull when you dive too deep, but it didn’t lessen when she calmed.

“...seven, eight, nine, ten, okay take a breath,” Dr. Sangui breathed with Callie. “And again, push,”

With her chin to her chest and jaw clenched so tight she thought her teeth would shatter, she started to care less and less about the gutteral sounds she made. She grabbed the back of her knees, her face scrunched-

“Here comes the head!” Dr. Sangui smiled. “Keep going- five, six, seven-”

Nick leaned forward to look, the air punched from his lungs once observing the horrifying sight before him.

“Okay take a quick break, this is the ring of fire but I think you can have his head out in another push,” she encouraged, piling gauze beside her.

“Oh fuck me,” Callie breathed, panting before falling back into concentration and pushing again, and lord did the ring of fire live up to it’s name. This time the shouts wouldn’t be suppressed, nor the curses. There was no way in hell anyone could expect composure now at this point with her center literally on the brink of ripping apart.

“Breathe breathe breathe and again,”

It was hard to hold her breath while she pushed; there was already so much pressure everywhere, and her head was starting to pound again-

There was a popping sensation, some slight relief.

“Heads out! C’mon Callie, one more good push!” Dr. Sangui cheered, a nurse stepping forward with a blanket over her outstretched arms.

Callie couldn’t see past her stomach when she searched frantically. “His head?” she looked up to Nick who’s eyes had glossed over when he looked at her.

“He has hair,” he smiled, his voice cracking.

Callie tittered, her shaking grip adjusting around Nick’s wrist again.

“You can do this,” he held the back of her head, sincerity pooling in his molten eyes. “You’re so close baby,”

Callie nodded again, eyes pinching shut when the wrath started to build up.

“Okay hun, one more time,”

She waited, inhaling deeply. “I can do this,” she whispered.

Nick started to exclaim and encourage when she felt Leo start to move from her, his grip tightening on her leg, but she couldn’t open her eyes while she pushed. Sangui cheered the same, and could feel her fingers move around Leo’s jaw and neck, pulling gently against her body until the pressure was finally gone.

She exhaled loudly as he came spinning out, Nick’s breathless exclaim opening her eyes just as the tiny, gargling screams came.

Callie sobbed as soon as he was lifted onto her bare chest, his arms thrown out angrily and puffy eyes pinched shut as he wailed into the cold world around him. Finally he was in her hold, at last able to touch the velvety skin of his face or feel his cries when resting her hand on his back, and the deep breaths he sucked in between every holler. She held the back of his delicate head, astounded by the dappling of Nick’s color that formed the markings across his round cheeks and human nose, all the way back to his tiny pointed ears.

Her words weren’t words at all, but simply emotions taking flight in wails and sobs as she touched every part of him that she’d grown.

She looked up at Nick who was wiping his eyes crudely against the sleeves on his arms. “I did it,” she sighed, her eyes sliding shut when he kissed her forehead. “Nick look at him,” she beamed, pulling him closer by the shirt.

His vision was blurry from tears when he dragged his knuckles faintly across Leo’s soft cheek, hiding the sobs in his other palm. His soft graze traced the tones of his skin, detailing the freckles that dusted across his shoulders and cheeks like his mothers.

His strong, little fingers wrapped around Callie’s, squeezing and releasing as he continued to weep against her chest as he was jostled and dried by the nurses. Nick smoothed the sticky, sandy blonde hair from his forehead, the parents laughing when Leo grunted loudly before stirring again.

“I didn’t expect this color,” Callie commented, carefully pulling it up to see he already had a few inches worth of hair running the curve of his head in a thick stripe.

“I didn’t expect hair,” he snorted.

Callie kissed his fingers, tears trailing down her cheeks as she admired him. “He’s so perfect,” she whispered, tapping his puckering chin.

Leo’s face scrunched, a soft chuff stirring a few coughs.

Nick’s heart wept; there was already so much of himself in him.

“I can’t believe how pretty he is,” Callie spoke softly, the pair in awe when he whined, his face sorrowing.

“He looks so sad,” Nick grieved, rubbing his arm that curled in tighter to his body, still gripping Callie’s finger.

Callie hushed him softly, craning her neck to press a flurry of kisses into his cheek and temple. “Que paso hermoso? Hm?” she cooed, more kisses finding his hand. “Are you angry you had to come out?”

“Is he…?” Nick trailed off, both of them freezing when his swollen eyes started to flutter open. Nick leaned far over, fighting to catch a glimpse of his eyes. “Can we turn that off?” he asked, pointing at the light.

“Oh, yep! Sorry little guy,” Dr. Sangui grinned guiltily, adjusting the high beam from his face.

Two bright golden jewels rolled around behind squinted eyelids, making out only a blurry outline of his father that smiled down at him.

“So all you got from me is my nose, huh?” Callie joked, both of them chuckling.

Leo’s big eyes opened wider, his head pressing back into her palm.

“Talk again,” Nick said, watching in amazement.

“Leo,” she called softly, beaming from ear to ear when he stilled, his eyes opened and looking in her direction. “Do you recognize my voice bebe? Do you hear me Leonardo Makar?” she whispered, kissing his knuckles.

He kept looking up, his blinks heavy as she spoke to him, kissing the space between his eyes that Nick ran the pad of his thumb up and down over to make his nose scrunch. When it was time for him to be weighed, her heart sank the moment he cried after being lifted from her chest, his serenity broken and warmth taken away

“Go with him,” she told Nick who was already following his crackly cries to the small heated bed.

He wailed and kicked, and Nick fought shouting at them to do this all later. Why couldn’t he just lay with Callie!? They didn’t need to be putting bands around him and measuring- he wasn’t going to grow that fast!

“He is ten pounds four ounces,” a nurse smiled back at Callie.

“Oh my god,” she wailed from behind him, but Nick wouldn’t drag his eyes from Leo who was continuing to howl and tremble under their assault.

 What else could they have to do!? They’d done the lengths, drying, wrapping yada-yada, what the fuck else!? How long were they gonna keep him crying there!? He wanted to move beside him and talk to him, offer his touch in comfort, but they remained huddled around him, rolling him side to side as they swaddled him.

 “Ready to hold him dad?” an older, more soft-spoken nurse asked Nick while she finished fixing the beanie pulled over his matted hair.

His anger fell away, excitement bringing forth a quick nod.

Leo was starting to whine angrily again just as Nick found his seat beside Callie’s bed, another nurse propping a pillow under his elbow before his son was lowered carefully into his arms. His head rested in the crook of his elbow, his body curled inwards towards Nick and his hands peeking out from the blanket where he tried to suck on his fist.

In Nick’s hold Leo looked small, but even he knew just by holding him that he was a big baby, but everything about him was precious, miniature. Nick’s curiosity moved under the beanie to his pointed ears, following his brow down to the tip of his rounded nose- Callie’s nose- and over his soft lips that searched for milk.

Leo’s feet nudged softly against Nick’s palm where his bottom half was curled up, and he squeezed them with great care, watching his toes spread when a foot finally broke loose of the swaddle. Nick’s thumb fit across the bottom of Leo’s silky foot, his toes curling around the tip of his finger when he pressed gently.

He chuckled every time a little arm sporadically sprung upwards, his grabbing hands aimless and sometimes gripping Nick’s shirt. His grip was strong around his finger, lifting his hand to gaze at his little, little fingernails.

Callie watched with misty eyes as Nick pulled Leo closer to his chest, leaning down to press firm kisses to his face, nuzzling his nose under his round cheeks even when the baby boy whined in protest. His crackly voice stirred sympathy in Nick’s already bursting heart, softly, and only half-heartedly apologizing to him after peppering more kisses against his chubby cheek. The blanket was secured tighter around his little shoulders, talking softly to him in Orkish whispers that he hoped would calm Leo’s tired cries. Babies crying usually made him nervous, but Leo’s little wails stirred something close to a sobbing laughter, something affectionate and overflowing with admiration for the little thing he held close to his heart.

He wanted to see those big, amber eyes look up at him, but the longer he remained curled tight against Nick’s warm chest with calming pats against his bottom, the more he couldn’t bear to move him from contentedness.

“Of course he doesn’t kick you when he’s angry,” Callie mumbled playfully, giggling at Nick’s goofy grin when he could finally pull his gaze away from his handsome son.

���He’s got a lot to say,” Nick rubbed the space between his eyes again, chuckling when his brows furrowed and he whined louder.

“Now we can call everyone,” she grunted, eyes pinching shut as the doctor went on to stitch and clean her up. It stung, but was nothing compared to five minutes ago.

Nick gasped softly. “I have an idea,” he whispered to Leo excitedly. He cringed when he disturbed him while stretching a leg to dig his phone from his pocket, comforting Leo enough to keep him from wailing as he found his mother in his call log, but his quick panting would soon lead to full on sobs again.

High-pitched whimpers started to emit from him, his arm coming from the blankets.

“I see what you’re doing,” Callie reached to touch Leo’s forehead, rubbing her fingers back and forth over the velvety skin.

Nick tensed when the line picked up, and as planned, Leo started to cry louder, his round face souring. “Ma?” Nick called, his voice bubbling with excitement.

“Nick- who’s, who’s baby?” Dinara finally spoke, breathlessly that was.

He fought but couldn’t steady his voice before saying, “He’s here, Ma,”

There was only shouting after that, clustered and slipping madly between English and Orkish as she screamed for Oleg, struggling to get out what she intended. Nick tried to answer her blubbering questions, but she was crying the next one out before he even had time to finish the first.

Nick let the nurse lift Leo from his arms and back into Callie’s after she’d finished, ending the call with his parents after getting enough out to tell them what hopital they were at.

“Come here come here,” Callie reached excitedly, cradling him tight to her chest and freely reining kisses over the small plain his soft face.

Nick wiped his eyes again, standing to watch quietly as the nurse assisted Callie on how to get Leo to latch, his body unwrapped from the blankets and resuming skin to skin contact. Now he was really screaming, his short legs kicking wildly and arms throwing erratically until he was placed on his stomach over Callie’s bare chest.

The sensation of breastfeeding would definitely be something to adjust to, and Leo although being eager to eat was a stubborn latcher, crying angrily when Callie struggled and her soft words doing nothing to calm his hunger.

Nick could see her becoming flustered under the gaze of the nurses, glancing up nervously while trying to adjust the support under her arms.

Without a word, he stuffed the pillow higher under her elbow, releasing his own breath when she did after Leo finally found his spot.

Her head dropped back, eyes closing with a small smile across her lips. “Thank goodness.”

It was a brief feeding; Leo needed only a few drops of colostrum before he released, but the whole feeding had been another sight to marvel at. He grunted through his nose as he suckled, his face scrunched hilariously. Leo detached himself with a single sharp cry, his big eyes starting to flutter open again. This time, Nick had his phone ready for pictures when he looked around sleepily, and blindly, basically, but his cries were now little grunts and chuffs, breathing rapidly in between wide yawns that made Nick and Callie’s hearts throb.

Nick promised and pleaded her beauty when he started taking photos of them, begging her not to hide her glow after pulling the blanket down enough to snap the photos that would be cherished forever. Leo lasted a while before his lids started to slide shut, his sporadic wiggles calming when Nick rubbed his bare, fuzzy back.

He leaned over to wiggle his face between his shoulder and cheek carefully, pressing final kisses everywhere until he started to stir, but rested his cheek against his back, the beat of his rapid heart filling his ears.

Callie touched Nick’s cheek, her eyes pooling with tears again. “He’s perfect, isn’t he?”

He kissed her before he lost his composure again, smoothing her messy hair away from her face and reminding her how beautiful, amazing, and strong she was. “He’s perfect because you’re perfect,” he kissed into her cheek, wiping her eyes when she tried to look away with blushing cheeks.

“Hey!” she sniffled, craning her neck to find their bags. “Get my phone, yeah? I wanna call Rosie,”

Nick quickly located her phone, handing it to her but replacing her hand on Leo’s back so he wouldn’t roll away by some miraculous chance.

Callie navigated her phone until the line was ringing on speaker, hopeful she wasn’t in the middle of a call.

“Heeey,” Rosie answered nonchalantly.

"You have to promise you won’t be mad at me,” Callie barely got out past the excitement in her voice.

There was a pause. “What did you do?”

She withheld the laughter to say, “I’m holding your nephew,”

“My nephew… my nephew. My nephew!? You had Leo!?” Rosie shrieked, the panic heightened in her shrill voice over the line.

“He has my nose!” Callie lamented, both her and Nick laughing when Rosie only screamed obscenely through the phone.

“I’ll be there! I’m coming right now, I love you so much I’ll see you soon!” Rosie sobbed, the line clicking before Callie could get another word in.

“I hope she doesn’t walk in screaming like that,” Callie giggled, stuffing her phone beside her.

Their attention quickly moved back to Leo when an acute growl vibrated through his small body, and that was when Nick lost it. He hid his face against the pillow behind Callie, laughing as she did but also sobbing like a mess. There was no need to explain the confusing swarm of emotions he was under the spell of to Callie or the nurses around them, and definitely not to Dr. Sangui who congratulated the new parents on their healthy baby boy, assuring to Callie that as soon as she left she’d be canceling the c-section.

When the sobs were muddled and eyes red and puffy found his son again, Nick rested his cheek against Callie’s arm above Leo’s head so he could watch him sleep, kissing soft I love you’s into his covered head while she counted his toes and fingers, touching the two freckles on his chin that matched hers. They detailed the distinct patterning of Nick’s hue over the caramel glow of his skin, the darker freckles in some spots and the lighter ones over his cheeks. Nick was in awe at how much of himself and Callie he found the longer he stared and how much was unexpected, but in every sense, and every way possible, Leo was perfect.

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Leonardo Makar Jakoby

July 19th | 10 lbs 4 oz | 21 in

Born to proud parents Calista & Nicholas

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😍Expect a lot of secret drawings of Leo now😍

[mostlycompetentwriter]

I Am You- Complete

Pairing: OC x Bang Chan x Jisung x Changbin (Stray Kids)

Genre: Romantic Fantasy

Warnings: Smut, Language, Violence

Word Count: 35,308 

Author’s Note: Hello, wonderful readers! I Am You is officially finished! I’d like to thank everyone who read the story and left a note or comment. It was really hard for me to put my writing on this site because I sorely lack confidence when it comes to my writing abilities. With that said, seeing how many people enjoyed the story was really validating. 

Also, the editing may be different in this full text because I tried to be responsible and use Grammarly's assistance.

Chapter One

Chan always treated me like I was something precious.

We were five years old when we met for the very first time. I remember clutching tightly to my mother’s leg while Chan stepped out from behind his parents to get a closer look at me. His eyes were a familiar blue, kind and warm, and he immediately scented the air. “She smells nice,” he told his mother, and the compliment softened my introverted shell. From that day on, we were nearly inseparable. 

Even our mothers had decided that we would be mates one day. “Chan is already sweet on her,” my mother would say, watching over the two of us. Chan liked to scent me, always curling into my side, when I was still somehow taller than him, burying his nose against the swollen gland. I would complain because his breath was hot and sticky, coating my skin with a light shimmer of moisture. 

We started school together with the other pups, holding hands when we walked into the classroom for the very first time. Apparently, the others thought it was weird, especially Jisung, who would mock Chan when he chose to paint with me instead of playing soccer outside. I didn’t like Jisung. He was rude and opinionated, and I hated how much Chan tried to impress him. 

Jisung’s best friend was a smaller boy named Changbin. Although quieter, all dark eyes and hair, he didn’t hesitate to join his friend in their endless teasing. Eventually, the teasing broke me and I cried for the very first time after Jisung managed to encourage the entire class to laugh at me when he read one of my poems out loud, voice high-pitched and mocking.

I was transferred to another class and, much to my displeasure, Chan started to spend more time with Jisung and Changbin. He would invite them over to his house, and I always left because I could barely stand being in the same vicinity. I became a loner, occasionally talking with some of the other girls, but mostly keeping to myself. 

By the time middle school came around, Chan and I had grown apart, joining different social circles. Chan was the third component to the mischievous and troublemaking trio that also consisted of Jisung and Changbin. They were always tormenting the younger pups, much to the chagrin of our teachers, and I did my best to stay off their radar. It was also around this time that our bodies slowly started changing. Chan finally grew taller than me, and Jisung and Changbin outgrew the cute roundness that most pups were born with.

High school further transformed our dynamic. It all started with Chan because the boy was absolutely heartbroken when his mother died. I remember being at the funeral, watching Chan from afar. He refused to speak at the ceremony, and I found him crying inside one of the bathrooms on the second floor of the viewing house. When I sat next to him, unhesitating in baring my neck, the blonde-haired boy had immediately touched his nose delicately to my scent gland. He pulled me into his arms and the two of us spent the next two hours talking, regrets and mistakes laid bare, until our souls felt as free as they had when we were children, reconciling like old acquaintances.

From that point on, Chan started spending a lot of time with me and we easily settled into our old friendship. It was wonderful, and I savored every second of our renewed bond. But Chan also insisted on maintaining his friendship with Jisung and Changbin, much to my displeasure. And Chan insisted we all get along, so I agreed to give the other two boys a chance.

However, I think Chan regretted that decision because Jisung and I butted heads at every opportunity. He was insufferable, whining about his parents forcing him to start patrols as if nobody else had to go through something like that. He was also irresponsible, and I didn’t understand why Chan liked him. Changbin was also difficult to like, especially since he remained silent most of the time, chattering softly with Chan and Jisung but always offering my questions and comments blank, dismissive stares.

And that was before Chan and I started sleeping together. 

It started when we both turned 16, and Chan complained to me about how painful his ruts could be. As an omega girl, I couldn’t really relate to his problems, but I had started getting my heats and figured the discomfort was comparable. We agreed to help one another, and I spent my first weekend in Chan’s bed, taking my first ever knot which was wildly uncomfortable, especially since Chan wasn’t in the right mindset to consider how it might affect me. 

However, when we returned to school on Monday, Jisung immediately picked up on our illicit activities. “You smell like Chan,” he said, tone accusatory. 

Jisung was furious when he discovered we had slept together. He was not only dismissive towards me, but he also ignored Chan as well. I personally didn’t care if Jisung ignored me, but I could tell it hurt Chan, so I confronted Jisung.

“You shouldn’t act like that,” I told him. “Chan is your friend.”

“He knew,” Jisung growled, frightening me a little with the heightened spicy element to his scent. “He broke our promise,” he insisted. I was confused by his anger because I had no idea what Chan could have done to hurt Jisung so much. 

Suddenly, my confusion was replaced by surprise when Jisung crowded me against the wall, leaning in abruptly to inhale deeply against my neck. “You shouldn’t smell like him,” Jisung continued and I stayed frozen in place, wincing when he roughly pressed his wrist against my scent gland, rubbing against the oily surface. 

Jisung seemed satisfied when he was finished, pulling away to scent the air again. “Better,” he muttered to himself.

After that day, Jisung was suddenly a lot nicer to me. He walked with me to my classes, offered to accompany me home after school, and he started bringing me a lot of random gifts: pencils and pens, paints and brushes, and even the little canvases I liked to use when I worked on my art. I never said anything because I figured this was his way of apologizing for the way he had acted before. Jisung certainly never apologized aloud.

It was also easier to tolerate Jisung when he acted like this and, on occasion, I even found myself laughing at the jokes he made or the funny, hyperactive way he liked to express himself. Of course, I reminded myself frequently about our childhood mishaps, the way Jisung would tease or ridicule me. “We were kids, Myah,” Chan would tell me. “Jisung grew up, we all did.”

But perhaps my biggest flaw was holding a grudge. 

It all came to fruition one afternoon while the three of us were eating lunch. I was quiet, suffering from some early cramping signaling my impending heat. I had applied scent blockers that day, hoping to disguise the sweet-smelling aroma from the rest of my classmates. It usually worked, but somehow Jisung was able to pick up on it. “You’re going into heat soon,” he bluntly said, and my cheeks blossomed with red, looking around to make sure nobody else had heard his observation.

“You can smell it?” I hissed incredulously, lifting my wrist to my nose, but finding myself unable to pick up on anything other than the dull, earthy scent of the blockers. 

Jisung cleared his throat, sheepishly glancing over at Chan as if looking for confirmation. Changbin was quiet as always, looking down at his food. “Myah,” Jisung started, catching me off-guard with the sincere use of my name. “I know heats can be painful to go through alone, so if you want, I could help you out?”

Jisung had surprised me before, but never to such an intimate extent. He was asking for permission to fuck me, not just once, but several times until my heat broke. It usually lasted for about three days, and that was a long time to spend with someone, especially considering the pathetic headspace I entered during my temporary fever-induced coma. “Why?” I asked, quickly looking over at Chan, expecting him to be outraged by the comment. But Chan was earnest, in that annoying way of his, and it felt like I was the only one who didn’t understand what was going on. “Chan already offered to help me out with my heats.”

I was trying to be nice for Chan’s sake. After all, there were a million other things I could have told Jisung, starting with our barely friendly acquaintanceship or the horrible way he had always treated me in the past. “I know,” Jisung replied, and he swallowed hard as if holding back his frustration. “But I’m offering to do you a favor.”

A favor? I finally snapped. “It wouldn’t be a favor from you,” I sharply retorted, “Why would you care anyway? I don’t like you, and I know you don’t like me. You’ve always treated me like shit, and you’ve always been there to embarrass me whenever you get the opportunity.” It dawned on me then that perhaps Jisung was mocking me again, embarrassing me now in front of Chan. “I don’t need you to keep putting me down,” I finally growled, my unregulated hormones adding aggression to my tone.

Jisung stood abruptly, and any further arguments dissolved when I realized that Jisung was crying, a tear trailing down the side of his cheek as he picked up his tray and stormed away. “That wasn’t nice, Myah,” Chan quickly chided me.

I turned my anger on him instead. “He was trying to embarrass me!”

“No he wasn’t,” Chan said, tone softening as his eyes scanned over my likely disheveled appearance. 

“Jisung likes you,” Changbin inserted, sighing as he picked up his tray. “It’s really obvious.”

I glared at Changbin’s retreating figure before turning on Chan, demanding answers. “Jisung has always been rude to me!”

Chan picked at his food, refusing to meet my gaze. “Jisung was trying to get your attention, but he was always afraid you would reject him, that’s why he acted so cold.”

“It doesn’t make sense,” I insisted, even as the memory of our strange bathroom encounter jostled itself into remembrance.

“He really likes your scent,” Chan supplied. “Alphas always like the scents of the omegas they see as potential mates.”

Mates? “We’re supposed to be mates, Chan,” I whined. 

Chan finally looked up, meeting my eyes with a serious expression. “Sometimes omegas can have more than one alpha.”

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Present

Hot.

I think I said it out loud, my voice hoarse from overuse, affected deeply by the intoxicating combination of our hormones. “I’ll take care of it,” he whispered to me gently, a contradiction to the heavy way he thrust into me, cock hitting deep inside.

“Feels good,” I said while inhaling his scent, a beautiful mixture of vanilla and something spicy, perfectly satisfying to my natural instincts. 

He ran his hand up and down the length of my thigh, wrapped around his slim waist securely, touch summoning hundreds of little bumps to rise along my skin. “Do you want a knot this time?” he asked, pressing delicate kisses along my collarbones.

“Jisung,” I moaned, voice catching on a lilt when I felt the base of his cock start to swell. “I need it, please.”

“Whatever my princess wants,” Jisung promised, and I felt my heart thud violently against my breastbone. I had always admired the way Jisung remained so controlled, able to vocalize coherently, responding to my pathetic pleas with kind assurances. I might tease Jisung relentlessly, as a recurring component to our dynamic, like telling him his cock could not compare to Chan or Changbin’s just to watch his eyes light with a familiar fire. But Jisung would always act so loving, even if he was rutting, and he more than made up for his size with his caring nature. His admirable ability to keep his alpha at bay, eyes remaining the same brown color that I loved, no matter what happened.

“It’s so good,” I pouted, tears flowing freely now, especially once his knot was fully engorged, keeping us locked together. My orgasm hit suddenly, after so much build and anticipation, forcing my eyes to close against the tide of pleasure. Jisung growled seductively into my ear, and I felt his release inside of me, warm and full.

I was gone, but Jisung, as usual, was fully present, moving us on our sides, arms wrapping around my waist as he scented me deeply. It was his tongue, wet and familiar, lapping over the bite mark he had left on my upper arm that brought me back. Jisung had been the second one to mate me, securing our bond together after such a long and tumultuous history. I was grateful to Jisung, his love was beautiful and adoring, and I usually went to him when my heats hit because he was always so careful.

It made Chan jealous because there was a time when I only wanted him to help me. But Jisung changed everything I knew about heats and sex, and all it had taken was a silly pinky promise we made in our school’s outdoor arena:

“Jisung,” I said softly, approaching the other male carefully. I felt guilty about how I had spoken to him at lunch, even if I felt it was deserved. Perhaps we both had things to work on. “I’m sorry.”

His shoulders tensed at my words, and that was the only acknowledgment I got as I took a seat next to him on the sidewalk. Jisung looked straight ahead, eyes still bloodshot and cheeks puffy, swollen from his tears. “Whatever,” Jisung grunted dismissively, refusing to look at me.

“I didn’t know,” I told him carefully. “I didn’t think you liked me. You’ve always been rude to me, so I didn’t know.”

We were both silent for a long time, and I pulled my knees closer to my chest, resting my chin on the perch I made. “I guess you wouldn’t know,” Jisung finally said. “I’m pretty stupid, right?”

“No,” I countered, scooting a little closer and reluctantly releasing a calming scent I knew would soften him. I just hated it because it would make the scent blockers less effective. I’d smell like heat for the rest of the day. But Jisung inhaled deeply. “We were both wrong,” I admitted. “I never really gave you a chance.”

“I made it hard for you to give me one,” Jisung said, looking deeply regretful. “I shouldn’t have asked to help you with your heat. I’m sorry.”

Hearing an apology from Jisung was about as rare as the blood supermoon. “You can help me if you want,” I said nervously, glancing at Jisung out of the corner of my eyes. “With my heat.”

Jisung stiffened, mouth falling open a little as he finally regarded me. “Really?”

“Yeah, it helps, you know,” I stuttered, “-to have a knot.”

It was Jisung’s turn to blush. “I- I can do that.”

“I hope so,” I teased him, and then I held up my pinky finger. “You can always ask in the future if you want. I promise I won’t yell.”

Jisung smiled, and it was one of the most sincere smiles I had ever seen. He wrapped his pinky around mine. “Okay.”

“Sweetheart,” Jisung purred now, “Are you okay?” I managed a nod, wincing a little as I shifted, his knot an unforgettable presence. “Careful,” he whispered.

“Sorry,” I instinctively apologized, my heightened omega instincts encouraging me to appease my mate.

Jisung found my obedience hilarious, teasing me around Chan and Changbin. “She’ll beg for it,” he once said proudly, wrapping my reluctant form into his arms. “But I always give my princess what she wants.”

“Sungie,” I purred happily, feeling my eyes grow heavy with the promise of sleep. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Myah,” he whispered back, nosing along my neck, accidentally brushing against Changbin’s mark. 

I felt my sadness return, remembering why I had forced Jisung to stay behind, even though he had been set to travel with Chan to a neighboring pack.

Changbin was ignoring me.

-------------------------------------------

Chapter Two

Changbin is volatile. 

His unpredictability has always been an obstacle in our relationship, even before he had accidentally mated me. It was a night I could never forget, especially considering Jisung and Chan’s outrage when they discovered us together. But it wasn’t Changbin’s fault, especially since he had always hidden his true feelings for me. And after years of holding everything back, the anticipated explosion did not turn out well for either of us. Yet, the dark-haired male was always sullen and quiet, and even after Jisung and Chan had both Declared, he still didn’t talk to me very much.

However, he always talked to other girls, and that really bothered me. I would always watch from a distance, observing with practiced patience how he would flirt with younger omegas. It was strange to be jealous, especially when I was sure Changbin didn’t like me. For example, back when the three of us were still in school, the boys would always beg for me to go to parties with them on the weekends. I relented because Jisung was absolutely adorable when he was drunk, clinging to me persistently. Thus, the four of us would always arrive together, but I remained silent because Changbin usually lost interest the minute I inserted myself into the conversation. On one such occasion, the pre-conditions were already different before everyone had even arrived:

“Your rut is close,” tipsy Jisung bluntly informed Changbin, wrinkling his nose in disgust. 

Changbin frowned. “You wanted me to come.”

Chan chuckled, holding me close to his chest, arms wrapped loosely around my waist as I nursed the sweet-tasting drink Jisung had brought for me. I had been trying to ignore Changbin’s scent all night. Unlike Jisung, I found his dark smell alluring, and it was taking a lot of effort to fight my instinct to bury my nose into the side of his neck. 

“They make scent blockers for a reason,” Jisung complained, eyes wandering over to me. I giggled at the sudden appearance of his smile, not protesting when he leaned in closer to scent me deeply. “I’ll just have to scent Myah instead.”

Chan let out a warning growl, apparently opposed to Jisung’s closeness. However, under normal circumstances, he wouldn’t even care if Jisung sought my attention, but I could also faintly detect Chan’s rut smell beneath his usual clean pine scent. 

Jisung pouted, leaning away to fold his arms across his chest. “Have another drink, Sungie,” I said, hoping to distract him. 

“Myah likes my scent,” Changbin suddenly announced, dark eyes appraising as they scanned over me. 

I was taken aback by Changbin’s forwardness, but also deeply embarrassed because he had promised not to say anything about my unfortunate comment, spoken out of term while I was under the influence of heat-induced hormones. You see, it had happened a few nights before my heat was set to break and Chan and Jisung had left me alone with Changbin to talk with a teacher after school. Changbin was mindlessly looking through a textbook when I leaned in closer, apparently not used to such close proximity. “You have a nice scent,” I had told him, only remembering our precarious relationship moments later, lost in mortification. 

I was slightly furious that Changbin had chosen now to speak up. “When did she say that?” Jisung asked, latching on to this new piece of information, as he always did.

“Cute,” Chan remarked, pinching my scarlet-red cheeks. 

“I didn’t mean it,” I protested, glaring in Changbin’s direction. “I was close to my heat.”

Changbin’s returning smile could only be described as arrogant. “You don’t have to lie, Myah. Other girls have told me the same thing.”

“Why don’t you go bother those other girls, then?” I asked him petulantly, overwhelmed by Jisung’s teasing, Chan’s incessant cooing, and the unfamiliar dark look in Changbin’s eyes.

“Only if you won’t get jealous,” Changbin rumbled, standing up to his full height, stretching out his arms above his head. I tore my eyes away from the wonderful flex of his biceps.

“He doesn’t mean anything by it,” Chan told me once Changbin was out of earshot. He probably picked up on my crestfallen expression. 

“He’s close to rut,” Jisung added, somehow managing to rest his head on my lap without my noticing.

However, my worsening mood was solely attributable to Changbin’s distraction, and I couldn’t stop thinking about him for the remainder of the night. It didn’t help that I saw him everywhere like he was trying to stay on my radar. He leaned into Omega girls, whispering sweet flirtations into their eager ears. He let them touch his arms, scandalous fingers testing the area over the front of his sinfully tight jeans. 

I was losing my mind, even with Jisung and Chan clinging to my arms. In fact, both of my future mates sought my attention and, at one point, I was situated in Chan’s lap, chasing his lips with intoxicating kisses. I had my eyes closed, tasting the inside of his mouth with my tongue, before leaning into his neck, scenting him in a way I normally wouldn’t do in public. But then I opened my eyes and found myself ensnared with Changbin’s impenetrable gaze. He had a petite blonde in his lap, running his teeth along the curve of her neck, even as his attention remained focused on me.

I shivered, feeling my scent spike as I followed the path of Changbin’s tongue, knowing he wanted me to watch. Chan shifted under me, and I could feel his erection through his pants. Apparently, the spike in my scent affected him more than I thought, and his rut scent was even more apparent. Jisung was the one to pull us apart, lecturing Chan on the dangers of going into a premature rut cycle.

I slipped away quietly while they argued, picking up Changbin’s scent easily. I followed it through the woods, admiring the quiet of the evening before a loud, exaggerated moan disrupted the tranquility. I should’ve known better than to follow it, especially as Changbin’s scent grew stronger. Still, I was completely unprepared to see him with another girl, body completely pressed against hers. 

“Where are you going?” he asked before I could turn back around.

I froze in place, watching him pull away from the other girl. His dark eyes were completely black, blown out with the influence of his obvious arousal. I glanced away quickly when I realized the girl’s top was missing. “Binnie,” she pouted, shaking his arm.

“Get lost,” he growled at her, and I looked up only when the other girl had stormed past me, making sure to hit her arm against mine.

“Are you following me?” Changbin teased, entire demeanor shifting as he sauntered over to me with a distinctly alpha posturing. 

“Your rut,” I informed him as if he wasn’t obviously aware.

“Yeah,” he agreed, grabbing my arm and pulling me against him. “You could help with that.”

“Changbin,” I started, losing all ability to speak when he started to scent me. It was a foreign sensation, as the only two male alphas who had dared touch the area were Jisung and Chan. I withheld a moan as one of his hands gripped tightly to my hair, wrenching my head back so that he could have better access to my scent gland. He let out a low, throaty growl, allowing his other hand to grab my ass, pulling me impossibly closer. I could feel his hard erection against my thigh.

He instinctively rutted his hips, as if to make sure I could feel all of him. “You aren’t used to that are you?” he asked and I was stunned by the bright red tint to his eyes. “I’ve seen Jisung and Chan in the locker room before. Do you even notice it when they’re fucking you?”

I moaned at his words, losing myself in the thick cloud of Changbin, his scent hanging in the air between us, summoning my basest instincts. “Are you gonna be good for me?” he continued, hands gripping my thighs before lifting me off the ground, forcing my legs to wrap around his waist. My back collided against the rough bark of the tree behind us, enough to temporarily knock the breath out of my lungs. 

Changbin’s scent grew thicker, and I knew he had entered his rut prematurely. I also knew how dangerous that could be, especially for alphas like Changbin: purebloods who were more in-tune with their inner wolves compared to most people, often losing out to their instincts in situations like this. But I had never been around an alpha like Changbin, and I was unable to grasp a single shred of rationality against his thick, blanketed rut smell.

He wanted to bite me too, I could tell from the way he insistently mouthed at my scent gland, tongue pressing against the swollen tissue, forcing more of the oily secretion to leak freely. “Changbin,” I managed, lost in a haze, half-heartedly pushing against his broad shoulders. 

He effortlessly muscled me to the ground, crawling over my weakening body, looking every part of the predator. “You want my knot?” he snarled, pushing my dress up my legs, leaving my lower half almost completely naked, save for the delicate lace protecting my modesty. But Changbin wasn’t deterred, removing the barrier before reclining back onto his knees, fingers quickly working apart his belt. “Tell me you want me, angel.”

The nickname appealed to every base Omegan instinct I had. 

“I do,” I groaned, tears beginning to fall because everything was overwhelming and left me completely distracted.

Suddenly, I instinctually arched my back, ignoring the awkward twist in my neck when he roughly penetrated me. I found out quickly that Changbin wasn’t a liar, his cock was considerably thicker compared to Jisung or Chan. It filled me with an almost painful stretch, partly because of the suddenance by which he had entered me, without warning or preparation. And his jeans were down just enough to release his cock, and the rough material was rubbing harsh red burns into the delicate skin of my thighs. “Changbin,” I whined. “It hurts.”

He grunted from above me, his pace slowing down, even if the exertion from doing so was evident in the contorted set to his mouth. But his knot was swelling fast, his rut state encouraging his body to fill me as quickly as possible and breed me full of his pups. In the heat of the moment, Changbin ignored everything except his alpha instincts, leaning down to bury his teeth into my scent gland. I was unprepared for the accompanying pain, letting out an uncharacteristic scream as he bit down, almost like he was trying to rip out my throat instead of leaving a mating bite.

And that’s how Jisung and Chan found us, locked together by Changbin’s knot, with blood streaking down the side of my neck.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Present

My most recent heat ended the next morning. It gave Jisung no reason to stay behind any longer. I insisted on seeing him off, allowing him to fuss over my outfit, complaining that I would be cold in my thin sweater. “Changbin will look after you,” Jisung said, appearing satisfied after adjusting his scarf around my neck, enveloping me in his sweet scent.

No, he won’t, I grumbled to myself. Because Changbin had been ignoring me for a whole week now, ever since his rut had ended. I always asked to help them through their ruts and Changbin was always hesitant to accept, ever since the night he mated me during the height of his passion. He never forgave himself for the unorthodox way he had done so, no matter how many times I told him that I had already moved on.

But Changbin had surprisingly accepted my most recent proposal and we had been locked away in his room for almost an entire week. Unfortunately, my body had grown exhausted with keeping up, as his heightened sex drive was impossible to satisfy. We had agreed not to knot again, but Changbin had been lost in the moment, a victim to his heightened alpha instincts. Changbin had accidentally forced his knot inside, even though my body had resisted. I was stuck in the infirmary overnight and the next morning, Changbin wouldn’t so much as look in my direction.

Jisung didn’t help matters, lecturing Changbin relentlessly while Chan refused to leave my side, coddling me like I was moments away from death rather than healing from a mundane injury. And Changbin always took things too seriously, so he was barely present in our camp, choosing instead to go on long hunts, leaving at dawn and returning well past nightfall. I was beyond irritated with the grumpy alpha, missing the calming effect of his dark scent. After so much time apart, our mating bond was suffering.

“Chan and I will be back in a few days,” Jisung continued, pressing a sweet kiss to the tip of my red-tinted nose. 

I pouted, knowing I would suffer without their affection, especially when Changbin made it clear that he wouldn’t bother. “Sungie,” I complained, wrapping my arms around him. I scented him deeply, hoping to at least remember the sweet vanilla for the remainder of the day.

“Princess,” Jisung gently pushed me back. “This isn’t like you.”

I’ve never been alone to suffer through Changbin’s moods, I wanted to tell him, but I knew it would only lead to more lecturing, and Changbin hated me enough. “I’m sorry,” I said, cursing my stupid omega emotions as the threat of tears burned the corners of my eyes. 

I spent the rest of the day locked in my room, scenting the sweaters Jisung and Chan had left behind for me. Chan’s scent was already starting to fade, which really upset my wolf more than I was expecting. Jisung and Changbin were so important to me, and I loved them more than anything else, but they did not reach me as deeply as Chan continued to do. Our bond had the most history, and our mating fulfilled even the deepest void of my soul:

I was already mated to Jisung and Changbin. They had left their respective marks on me. Jisung had insisted not long after the incident with Changbin. He waited until my next heat to mark me, choosing to place his bite further away from Changbin’s, on the fleshy part of my upper arm, easily hidden away by sleeves. I was surprised he had chosen such a spot as I figured Jisung would be the one to bite my neck, to proudly show off his mark, but Jisung continued to surprise me.

Changbin was slowly opening up to me, especially now that our shared bond allowed me to know how he was feeling before he was even aware. He still hated how it had happened, but I tried my best to show him that I would never hold that against him. I came to realize that Changbin and I were very much alike, introverted personalities aside. Changbin was very loyal, and he was always ready to defend me, which the submissive part of my instincts adored.

But I was still waiting for Chan to declare his Intention. Each day without a word on the subject concerned me. “He’s just waiting for the right moment,” Jisung tried to assure me.

And I thought the right moment would be Chan’s rut, but the alpha refused me when I asked to spend it with him. It hurt a part of me that only Chan could access, and the refusal weighed heavily during each subsequent day during which I knew Chan was suffering. Since Jisung was out of town, I snuck into Changbin’s bed, readily drowning myself in the alpha’s heady scent. “I know what you’re doing,” Changbin said, gently gliding his nose along my jawline. “I don’t like being a distraction.”

Well, sometimes the bond was annoying.

After an entire month passed with no word from Chan, I decided to confront him myself. Our graduation was nearing, and there was a lot to figure out with our situation. As my mates, Jisung and Changbin could choose to enter a new pack or start one of their own. I wouldn’t be inclined to have any say in the matter, as tradition dictated, and I knew the pair had been talking about forming their own pack. But leaving Chan behind was a scary thought, so I was growing desperate.

I cornered him after classes one day, reciting my monologue in my head so I wouldn’t forget a single word. “Chan,” I addressed him, “Can we talk?” The blonde-haired alpha let out a vague, noncommittal noise as he continued to mess around in his locker. “Jisung and Changbin have already done it,” I said, letting out a deep breath. “We’re already Declared and I know we’ve talked about Intention before. I think it might be nice to mate before school ends.”

Chan barely glanced up. “I can’t talk about this now, Myah. I have something to do after school.”

“Chan-” I tried again, but the alpha had already moved on, shutting his locker door before leaving me alone in the hallway.

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Chapter 3

“Have you seen Changbin?” I asked Felix, watching the younger alpha absent-mindedly skin the deer laid out on the table in front of us.

“I think he’s hunting,” Felix replied, frowning as he let out a disgusted sound. “It would be nice if he could skin his own kill every once in a while.”

“He’s always hunting,” I huffed in frustration.

Felix shrugged, “He’s probably not far out. He just left like fifteen minutes ago. You can probably catch up to him if you need something.”

I immediately heeded Felix’s suggestion, shifting forms carefully, as it had certainly been a while since I last allowed my wolf to takeover. However, I knew it would be much easier to catch up to Changbin with a better nose, relying purely on smell to find my tsundere mate. And I picked up on his trail fast, following his scent slowly while I still felt unsteady on the four legs replacing my usual two. I really needed to run more with Jisung when he offered. It was almost embarrassing how out-of-touch I felt with my hyper-active wolf, especially after experiencing yet another clumsy fall along the mountain rocks. 

I was fully committed to shifting every day.

Thankfully, I found Changbin quickly, distracted by the small doe grazing a hundred yards or so away. I waited patiently, making sure my scent was down-wind so that he couldn’t possibly blame me if he missed this kill. But Changbin was the pack’s best hunter, and he tracked down the unsuspecting creature with startling astuteness. 

It was as he was dragging the doe back down the cliffside that he spotted me. His dark brown wolf let out a grumpy growl as he walked over to where I waited. He let the prey fall from his mouth, regarding me with a look that I could only describe as reprimanding. 

I heard his voice speak clearly through our mind-link. “You shouldn’t be out here.”

I refused to back down. “You’re always hunting these days. How else was I supposed to talk to you?”

Changbin’s wolf was imposing as he stood over me. He was bigger than most wolves, and he exuded power and dominance. “Go back to camp.”

I watched as he leaned back down to pick up the doe. “Will you talk to me tonight?”

“I’m hunting late.”

I let out a sharp bark, racing ahead to block his path. “Why are you ignoring me?”

“Don’t act like this, Myah.” 

“I don’t understand why you can’t talk to me. Are you really going to punish me for something I already forgave you for?”

He bullied his way past me. “It’s dangerous up here. Now go home.”

Stung by his disregard, I obeyed his order, starting back down the path with much less spring than I had before. I glanced back over my shoulder at the big alpha, wondering if Changbin knew how much he was hurting me. 

But distractions were never a good thing on the mountain, and I heard the switch before I felt its claws. Unfortunately, I had failed to keep an eye on the path in front of me, as Changbin had constantly warned me about, but that didn’t make it any less shocking. Which is probably why, at first, the pain from the trap didn’t register over my surprise. But then I felt it deeply when I saw the blood. I let out a pained howl, instinctively trying to pry my leg away from the source of my pain. It only worsened the situation, the sharp edges digging brutally into my flesh. 

“Don’t move!”

I heard his command before I could scent him, but Changbin was suddenly there, burying his head into the side of my neck, releasing soothing alpha pheromones even as the pain grew to an unbearable level. I fell to the ground, craning my neck around to look at my mangled leg, bits of flesh and blood amidst the silver trap. I saw fingers next, faintly realizing Changbin had shifted to his human form, working at the trap.

Then I heard the mountain lion’s growl.

----------------------------------------------------

“I think Channie hates me,” I complained to Jisung, watching the alpha move about his room, a towel wrapped messily around his waist.

“Chan doesn’t hate you,” Jisung chided gently, digging for a pair of sweatpants out of his closet. 

“What did I do?” I asked, ignoring Jisung as I rolled onto my back, looking up at the ceiling.

“Chan’s just stressed,” Jisung said. “He’s got a lot of decisions to make.”

“Mating shouldn’t be a difficult decision,” I muttered because it was true. In fact, mating should be easy with the person you love.

“Don’t be impatient,” Jisung said, suddenly appearing above me. “Chan always thinks about everything too much, you know how he is.”

“It shouldn’t require any thinking,” I said, letting out a whine of protest when Jisung moved onto the bed, crowding me into the mattress. I broke off only when I was wrapped in Jisung’s arms, secure against his strong chest. His vanilla scent surrounded me, and I could tell he was releasing calming pheromones, which I appreciated.

“Everything will work out in time,” Jisung whispered, pressing a tender kiss to the side of my temple.

-------------------------------------------------------------

“Changbin!” I cried out through the bond, watching the mountain lion creep closer, likely smelling my blood in the air.

Changbin managed to open the trap and I whined as I pulled my leg free. “Can you shift?” he asked me, but I was in too much pain to concentrate so I shook my head, desperately trying to push myself onto all four legs, but collapsing back down each time. The mountain lion growled, haunches raised in an attack position. Changbin shifted back easily, his intimidating wolf forcing the lion to briefly reconsider its plan. “Don’t worry,” Changbin said, using the mind link to offer me calming reassurances.

I threw back my head to howl, hoping our other packmates could hear the call. Unfortunately, it also prompted the lion into action and it launched itself at Changbin. I watched in horror as it wrestled Changbin to his back, exposing his soft underbelly and tender throat. The sound of its claws slashing through fur and flesh was revolting and my stomach churned dangerously. Changbin fought back, using his hind legs to push the lion off, reclaiming an upright position before chasing after the lion, nipping at its weaker tendons. The lion stumbled on the loose rocks and Changbin brought it down, tearing into whatever flesh his teeth could sink into.

I looked away from the gruesome scene, calling out for Chan and Jisung through the mating bond, but they were probably too far away to hear my pleas. Instead, I let my wolf take control, and she slowly started limping us over to the coverage of the bushes, hoping to disguise the scent of our blood. However, the lion did not like her decision, losing sight of its easy prey. He managed to throw Changbin off, and I winced as his body crashed into the side of the rocks. I tried to throw myself forward but let out a pained yelp when I felt the lion’s teeth dig into my leg, pulling me away from my destination. 

I whined loudly, panting hard against wave after wave of pain, my flesh wound reopened by the lion’s unforgiving teeth. We started down the slope and I knew I was going to die. The lion would easily drag me somewhere it was familiar with, ripping into my throat before using my carcass as its meal for the next several days. I was poisoned with fear, watching my life slowly drain out onto the rocks around me.

But Changbin hadn’t given up, and the lion was unprepared for Changbin to attack again. My mate managed to wrestle the lion into a precarious position of weakness, immediately going for its throat and locking his teeth around its pulse point. I faintly observed Changbin pulling back with a large chunk of flesh between his teeth, my vision swimming in and out of focus. I did register Changbin’s dark scent, and his familiar voice trying to reach out to me, even as the blackness finally claimed me.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I knew Chan was going to break up with me. I could tell by his posture, by the distinct way he was hunched in on himself, doing no favors to his taller height. He was also unusually quiet, taking me by the hand to lead me to the meadow where we always played together as children. The one his mother had taken us to for the very first time when we were barely five years old. It was a special place full of meaning and Chan knew how important it was to me, how I always felt calmer when I was surrounded by the familiar daffodils.

He wanted me to be comfortable because the news he was going to deliver would likely break my heart. This was all I could think about when Chan finally turned around to face me, eyes distant and sorrowful. “Myah,” he said my name, and my heart reached out to him. “Do you love Jisung and Changbin?”

I was thrown by the unexpected question. “Of course I do.”

“You know they’ll always take care of you, right?”

Chan’s questions seemed misplaced. “What are you talking about?”

Chan sighed, stuffing his hands into the pocket of his jacket. “Jisung and Changbin are starting their own pack, you know.”

I nodded because it was usually all Jisung talked about. He was beyond excited to lead his own pack, and Changbin was relieved to get away and start his own family. Felix would be joining, along with several of their friends: Seungmin, Minho, Hyunjin, Jeongin, and Woojin. I was excited too because I adored the idea of starting something new, especially with my mates by my side. 

But that needed to include Chan as well.

“My father wants me to stay here,” he finally said. “He wants me to lead our pack in the future.”

I immediately shook my head. “You have to come with us, Chan. Jisung and Changbin are your best friends, and I-”

“I’ll get in the way,” Chan interrupted. “You already have two mates, Myah. They both adore you.”

“But I need you too,” I protested, squeezing our intertwined hands. “You mean so much to me, Chan. We’ve known each other since we were kids.”

“I know,” Chan agreed, pausing to look around, a nostalgic smile on his face. “We got into a lot of trouble together, but that was a long time ago. We both have to start considering our futures.”

I stepped in closer, eliminating more of the space between us, even though it still felt like it wasn’t enough. “My future means nothing without you in it.”

Chan’s expression softened. “I can’t do that to you.”

“You’ll break my heart,” I warned him. “You’ll hurt me and you promised you wouldn’t.”

“Not if you don’t let me,” Chan said. “You deserve a long life, Myah, with Jisung and Changbin.”

“With you,” I insisted earnestly. “Chan, if it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have Jisung or Changbin.”

“But you do have them,” he said. “You’ll always have them.”

He tenderly reached out, thumbing his way across Changbin’s mark on my neck. “But I need your mark.”

“It’s too much.”

“Not it’s not!” I disagreed, clutching even more tightly to him, feeling like he might vanish at any moment. “Chan, you made a promise to me! You can’t say these things. Please don’t leave me.”

I was starting to panic and Chan picked up on it, releasing more of his soothing scent which I consumed greedily, faced with the possibility of never having it again. “I’ll visit when I can.”

“It won’t be the same,” I trembled, disregarding the space he tried to maintain, collapsing into his arms.

“You’ll move on.”

“No, I won’t,” I insisted, leaning up to scent him. “Why are you doing this? Why bother even promising it to me if you never planned on keeping it?” 

He winced as if my comment caused him physical pain. “At one point, I did intend to keep it, but then you mated with Jisung and Changbin. I could see the change in you, the way you looked happier around them. You really don’t need me anymore, Myah. It’s just hard to let go of the past.”

My tears were soaking through his t-shirt, but I knew Chan didn’t care. “If you leave me, I’ll miss you every day. You’re my best friend, Chan. My soulmate.”

“Be good for me,” he whispered into my hair. 

“Stop it!” I harshly interjected, abruptly pulling out his arms, startling both of us. “Stop saying that you’re leaving. If you really loved me, then you would stay.” Chan was at a loss for words, opening his mouth before closing it again. “I don’t care about our pack now,” I continued, “I care about the one I’m building, and I refuse to be a part of it without you. How can you not understand how much you mean to me? I don’t just want you, Chan, I need you! I depend on you for so much and if you left, I’ll be completely empty, because you won’t be there to fill those places anymore.”

I was incoherent, tasting my salty tears as I shook my head vigorously, refusing to acknowledge Chan’s words. Empty threats, that’s all they were. Chan had been mine from the moment we met, and nothing would ever tear us apart. No matter how many people came between us, or how many fights we got into, or how he could ever think we’d be able to live without one another. Chan caught me in his arms before my knees gave out and he brought us both to the ground, holding me close as I cried against his chest. “What can I do to convince you?” I pleaded with him. “I’ll do anything.”

For a while he was quiet and I continued to sob those terrible soul-wrenching cries that jarred the places inside of me that was frightening. Dark places I tried to hide away, like the evil voice that sometimes whispered that I wasn’t good enough for any of them. That voice might be right, but I always did my best. I would always fight for them.

Finally, Chan gently encouraged me to lean back, drying my tears with his sleeves. He picked up my wrist, brushing his lips across the blue-colored veins decorating the surface of my creamy skin. “Shall I do it here?” he asked, glancing up at me with eyes that reminded me of home.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I could only smell Changbin when I woke up, dizzy with the after-effects of restless sleep. His scent was spiked with fear. It was enough to pull me back to consciousness, and I blinked against the blinding white light infiltrating my line of vision. “Ah,” a familiar voice spoke. “You’re finally awake?”

I glanced over at Woojin. “How long have I been out?”

“A day or so,” he replied, “But I think it was the trauma. Your leg will take some time to heal.”

I sat up slowly, listening to Woojin’s advice while leaning back against the bed frame. “Is it really bad?”

“I’ve seen worse, but that was back during my training. You’re the first real injury we’ve had in the new pack.”

“That sucks,” I said, and Woojin chuckled. 

“Your mates have been worrying all night,” Woojin informed me. “I couldn’t get Changbin to leave. His scent was everywhere.”

“I can smell it,” I acknowledged. “But when you say mates-”

“Felix freaked out,” Woojin said, rolling his eyes. “He and Seungmin ran all the way to the border, and I’m sure they made it sound far worse than it actually was.”

“That was an important meeting,” I said. “They shouldn’t have done that.”

“Well, Felix is young, and it’s hard to be in your right mind when the third in command is running around nearly hysterical. I had to give Changbin some morphine, his body was halfway between wolf and human. It wasn’t pleasant to see.”

“Great,” I muttered because I didn’t like the idea of everything falling apart over me.

“They can return to the northern lands later,” Woojin said as if he knew exactly what I had been thinking. “I’m sure Taeyong would gladly welcome back Chan and Jisung. He has a mate of his own and understands how it feels to be away when they’re hurt.”

“I can’t really move it,” I said, frowning at my immobile leg. “Is that normal?”

“It’s the cast,” Woojin explained. “Do you feel well enough to talk to your alphas?”

I groaned at the idea of dealing with their high-strung whining, mothering me to the point where I felt suffocated. Woojin grinned. “I can tell them you’re still sleeping.”

“Maybe for tonight,” I agreed.

Not because I didn’t love them, of course, but because they could turn into an absolute nightmare when their alpha instincts insisted I was on my deathbed as opposed to a sterile hospital cot frowning down at my cast. 

It would be a long recovery.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I could feel Chan everywhere. 

I tried not to wince at the pain, instead of focusing on the growing bond, ignoring the way his teeth sank into my wrist, eyes bright with a vivid orange color. Instead, I only thought about Chan and it made the pain bearable. I thought about his lovely hair, naturally curly, thick strands soft between my fingers. I thought about his gorgeous eyes or the wicked slope of his nose. I thought about his handsome features, and how his smile completely eclipsed even the lowest of my moods. I thought about his warm voice and familiar scent, the rich smell of pine that reminded me of my childhood.

I thought about the way Chan made love to me, treating me like I was fragile. His body covering mine, sheltering me under his protective form. His soft kisses drawing small moans, encouraging him to give more. His pulsing cock inside of me, filling me to the brim with all the love he could give. A special kind of love incomparable to the way I felt with Jisung or Changbin.

Because Chan was encompassing. He was everywhere, present at all the points in my life I could remember, good or bad. And he filled all my empty places, the darkest parts of myself that I hated, but he managed to bring light to them all. He was everything I needed to feel complete, marked by three alpha wolves who would do absolutely anything my heart desired.

I was finally me.

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Chapter 4

I was losing my mind, and it was because of my three alpha mates.

I had yet to have a moment to myself in nearly a week, always shadowed by Jisung or Chan or Changbin. They hovered around me, tending to me like I was a child instead of the woman they regularly had sex with. I was beyond annoyed with their behavior, growing restless because every time I attempted to stand up, one of them was always there, lifting me into their strong arms. “Where to Myah?” or “Where are we going Princess?” or “Where do you want me to take you, Angel?”

My leg was practically healed. Woojin had even said so, coming to my room and updating my prognosis, now merely a long scar, nodding to himself slowly. “It’s almost healed,” he declared. “You should be fine, Myah.”

All three of my mates let out collective sighs like it was the most anticipated news of the century. “Woojin, I can start walking again, right?”

“Maybe soon, Myah.”

I tried not to sigh because Woojin wouldn’t have known that I required a straight answer. His response was vague enough to likely convince Jisung that I would be out of commission for another week. “What about more antibiotics?” Jisung fretted now, digging through Woojin’s bag. “Did you bring any?”

Woojin snatched his bag away from Jisung, glowering in his direction. “She doesn’t have an infection.”

“I can still smell it,” Changbin insisted, scenting the air with a studious expression that I would normally find hilarious under any other circumstances.

“Maybe another dosage wouldn’t hurt,” Chan added, perched on the edge of my bed, fingers running through my hair while he ignored my frown.

“It’s unnecessary,” Woojin insisted. 

“What about more pain killers?”

“Should it still be elevated?”

“Will it be okay in the water now?”

Woojin’s eyes widened, glancing between my three mates with evident exhaustion. “Honestly, some time away from the three of you would be best for Myah.”

Jisung protested immediately, launching into a long tirade about how Woojin wouldn’t understand how they felt since he didn’t have a mate of his own. And Jisung’s more spirited lectures tended to last far longer than necessary, so I somewhat eagerly awaited for Woojin’s inevitable breaking point. However, perhaps graciously, the sudden appearance of Felix interrupted Jisung’s passionate speech. “Chan,” the younger asked, glancing at me with uncertainty as if he wasn’t sure he could deliver his news with me present. “Another messenger from the NCT pack visited. They’d like to reschedule your meeting soon.”

“Impatient,” Chan grumbled. “Maybe in another week.”

I was ready to protest, knowing another week would be unnecessary. However, Felix beat me to it, supplying another idea that I wasn’t exactly too fond of either. “What if we asked NCT to come here instead?”

“That’s not a bad idea,” Jisung agreed, reaching over to ruffle Felix’s hair. “Nice job, kid.”

Felix frowned, giving me an apologetic look before closing the door. Meanwhile, Woojin was whispering quietly to Changbin, and their eyes kept roaming in my direction. What else was I supposed to think they were talking about?

I glared down at Chan and Jisung as they started crawling into bed on either side of me, snuggling against my sides. “Are you tired, Princess?” Jisung asked, leaning in to scent me.

Thanks to you guys, I wanted to say, but withheld the urge, managing a small nod to satisfy them. “I’ll come to check on you tomorrow, Myah,” Woojin said, and my eyes sorrowfully followed him all the way out the door, groaning when I heard Changbin announce it was time for another bath.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I wanted to be with my mates when we formally greeted the NCT representatives, but they forced me to stay in bed. I was a little heartbroken because I had been looking forward to meeting new faces. It was always exciting when new scents were around. Thankfully, kind-hearted Amelia, Hyunjin’s beautiful Omega mate, was keeping me company. The usually soft-spoken female was chattering openly about the unexpected size of the NCT diplomats. Apparently, Chan was very unhappy having so many foreigners around. “Do they have accents?” I asked.

Amelia giggled. “Some of them do. Not all of them are from the north, apparently.”

“I want to see them,” I sighed, glaring at my leg. “I hate being bedridden.”

“Maybe I can help you sneak out?” Amelia suggested mischievously. 

I briefly entertained the idea. “There’s no way I can get past three alphas. Especially Changbin, he’s too good at catching my scent.”

Amelia pouted, sharing my disappointment. “There’s a big dinner tonight to welcome them. Maybe you can convince them to let you go.”

But even such a simple request was like pulling teeth. 

“Please Channie,” I pleaded with my mate, nuzzling against him in the way I knew he liked, batting my eyelashes as I put on my best pout. 

Chan, however, was undeterred. “Not like this, Myah,” he said sternly. “There’s too many of them.”

Fine, I had two other mates who were less stoic. 

“I don’t think so, angel,” Changbin chuckled, further crushing my hopes.

“Chan already told you no, Princess,” Jisung said, but his resolve was not nearly as strong.

“Please, Sungie,” I tried again. “It would really mean a lot to me.”

“Well, maybe for a little while-”

-------------------------------------------------------------

And that’s how I found myself talking animatedly with Amelia and her younger sister, Lila, while the three of us eagerly made easy work of the feast the pack had prepared for our visitors. “I can’t believe they let you come!” Lila said at one point, shock evident on her face. “Chan made it sound like you would be out for weeks!”

I rolled my eyes. “He’s just being dramatic.”

“Mates are always dramatic,” Amelia agreed, glancing over at Hyunjin who was laughing with Felix and a few NCT members.

“They keep looking over here,” Lila said nervously and I immediately turned to glare at Changbin, the dark-haired boy sheepishly returning to his conversation with Seungmin.

“Ignore them,” I insisted. “Tell me about the newcomers.”

“Taeyong couldn’t make it,” Amelia said, “but he sent his Beta.” She nodded towards the smaller boy talking with Chan and Jisung. “Mark.”

I appraised him carefully, deciding his appearance must be deceitful, as he certainly didn’t look capable of harming a fly. “He brought seven wolves with him,” Amelia informed me. “That’s a lot more than we were expecting.”

“It’s disconcerting,” Lila admitted. “I think that’s why Chan is so suspicious.”

“They haven’t said anything to me,” I shrugged.

“They’re too worried about keeping you inside all day,” Amelia groaned dramatically. “The kitchens are boring without you!”

“I miss working,” I admitted. “I just wish Woojin would take the cast off.”

“He probably doesn’t want to take any chances,” Lila inserted. “After all, you are the pack alpha’s mate.”

“If it was up to Chan, I would stay at home every day,” I said, frowning. 

“He’s overprotective,” Amelia said. “All alphas are.”

“I like being outside and he knows that,” I said, suddenly feeling a burning irritation towards my mates, especially after having my first taste of freedom in over a week.

“Looks like Haechan is coming back,” Amelia teased her little sister and I glanced up at the approaching male.

“Hello,” Haechan bowed respectfully. I grinned at Lila’s blush. “It’s nice to finally meet you, Myah.”

“Likewise,” I returned. “I’ve been dealing with an injury lately.”

“Your mates told us,” Haechan said, nodding to the empty seat next to Lila. “Can I join?”

Lila let out a weak noise, perhaps agreement, and Haechan slid into the seat next to her. “Tell us about the north?” I asked eagerly, drowning out all other discussions as I allowed Haechan’s descriptions to fill my head. The north sounded beautiful, a land of snow and ice, unbearably cold in the winters, but rather pleasant during the hotter seasons. It wasn’t a long distance from the valley. An easily manageable walk when (and if) my mates ever decided I could make use of my own two feet again.

“I want to go! I think it sounds like a dream.”

“It’s fine,” Haechan said dismissively, but the look in his eyes told another story.

-------------------------------------------------------------  

“You should ask Changbin.”

I glanced up in surprise. “You don’t want to help with my heat?”

Jisung always took pride in being my first choice, especially since it provided a way for us to spend some time alone together, even if I was an incoherent mess for most of the duration. It’s not that I didn’t want to be with Chan or Changbin, but Chan was rather aggressive when I was in heat and I had never asked Changbin before. He was adamant about refusing sex during his ruts, so I figured he would have a similar attitude when it came time for my heats.

Jisung shrugged. “I think Changbin is upset that you never ask him.”

“He’s never said anything before...” In fact, the idea of Changbin being upset over something like this was hard to grasp.

“Well, I think it’s because he thinks you don’t want him,” Jisung said.

I scoffed at the ridiculous statement. “He never lets me near him when he’s rutting. I figured he wouldn’t want anything to do with my heats.”

“I think you’re wrong this time, princess,” Jisung said. “Changbin’s told me before that he’s always available to help if I’m not feeling up to it.”

“Huh,” I drawled, deciding I felt very inconsiderate at that moment. I suppose I just got used to asking Jisung whenever my symptoms started to flare up. It became habitual, and I didn’t stop to think about how my other mates might feel. “Well, I guess I can ask him instead.”

Jisung offered an encouraging smile. “I think it will make him very happy.”

I found Changbin later that day, sparring outside with Chan. The two were imposing as wolves, teeth bared and jaws snapping at one another. I glanced around with amusement at the younger alphas, watching the exchange with wide, curious eyes. I had forgotten that Chan and Changbin were teaching the sparring classes now that Hyunjin was away with his mate, spending time with Amelia’s family before the two returned. 

I waited patiently for my two mates to finish, taking the time to admire how powerful they were together. Chan and Changbin were both larger for their size, extending from years of impressive breeding and mating with strong bloodlines. Of course, no other wolf in the pack could really compare to Changbin. He was by far the largest wolf I had ever seen, easily eclipsing Jisung in size and somehow managing to even make Chan look like a pup. 

The two were talking in low voices together, wearing nothing but sweatpants when I approached them after their lesson. Changbin picked up on my scent first, eyes easily locating me from amongst the other members of our pack. Chan followed his gaze and a wide smile filled out the corners of his lips. “I’m surprised to see you here,” Chan gushed while proceeding to crush me against his much stronger body. 

“Too much,” I tried to tell him, but eventually surrendered, taking in his familiar scent with a deep inhale.

“Do you need something, angel?” Changbin asked, proving to be my saving grace when Chan’s arms finally released me.

I took in a deep breath. “Actually, I’d like to talk to you.”

“This sounds serious,” Chan remarked, leaning in close as if the answer were waiting in my scent.

“Alone,” I emphasized, giving Chan a pointed look.

He let out a dramatic sigh but conceded the space I needed. However, I still waited until he was far enough away before reaching out to Changbin. “Let’s go somewhere quieter.” I wrapped my hand around his bicep, directing him through the lingering crowd of our packmates. Changbin grabbed a black t-shirt on the way, stretching it out over his head.

I was suddenly nervous when we were finally alone, anxiously fidgeting in front of the bigger alpha. “So, how is everything?” I asked cautiously, trying to reformulate my proposal, hoping to make it sound as casual as possible.

Changbin arched one brow. “Are you alright, Myah?”

I let out a nervous giggle. “I have something to ask you.”

Changbin nodded, encouraging me to continue. “I’m listening.”

“That thing is coming up,” I started, wincing when I realized I was already messing everything up.

Changbin smirked. “That thing?”

“Yeah,” I agreed as if he could possibly understand what I was talking about. “I was wondering if you wanted to help.”

Changbin crossed his arms over his chest, the sleeves of his black t-shirt straining. “Angel, I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“My heat, Changbin! I want you to help me with my heat.”

My face was red, and I could feel my cheeks heating up because I knew how rushed I just sounded. The words had spilled out carelessly in one of the worst proposals in Werewolf history. Changbin even looked surprised, looking down at me wordlessly. “Uh, I mean, if you don’t want to-”

“I’d love to help,” Changbin finally said, a genuine, and rare, smile brightening his dark features. 

“Well, I know you’ve been busy lately-”

“Angel,” he interrupted again, wrapping an arm around my waist to pull me closer. He pressed a brief kiss to my forehead. “I’ve been waiting to hear you ask for a while now.” I leaned up to nose at his scent gland, amazed that he could ease my tension with just a few, select touches.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter Five

“Have you ever had sex as a wolf?”

“Are you serious?”

Lila turned over on her side. “Have you?”

“You don’t need to know that,” I tried to protest, even as she let out a triumphant noise while poking my blushing cheek.

“Was it Changbin?” Lila asked mischievously. “I bet that was hot.”

I frowned in her direction. “This isn’t a normal conversation.”

“I know,” Lila grinned, “but Felix said it wasn’t possible. I just want to prove him wrong.”

“The two of you always have such thoughtful discussions,” I remarked, admiring the stars shivering from overhead, distant ornaments of light that managed to shine so bright, forgoing millions of miles to demand our attention.

“Myah,” Lila spoke up nervously. “Would you be angry at me if I left the pack?”

That definitely caught my attention. “What?”

Lila shuffled closer to me, seeking out my additional warmth. “I really like Haechan, but if I mated with him, I would have to leave.”

I swallowed hard, the idea of never again seeing Lila sitting uncomfortably on my heart. “If you like him, then you should go. I would never be angry at you.”

“Really?”

I nodded, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. “It will give me an excuse to visit the north.”

Lila shifted, her chin digging into my shoulder. “Was it hard to leave your old pack?”

“No, but I was okay because I had my mates. It makes it easier.”

“Were you afraid?”

“A little, but change can be scary. Doing something you’ve never done before forces you out of your comfort zone.”

Lila sighed, but seemed content with my response, the two of us lying beneath the stars while enjoying the peaceful quiet of the night.

-------------------------------------------------------------

“I’m really nervous,” I told Jisung, pacing back and forth along the hardwood floors of my room.

“It’s just Changbin,” Jisung said, sifting through my closet for something to take back to his room. Jisung claimed he would miss my scent too much, so I reluctantly gave him free rein of my closet.

“Changbin has never seen me on my heats,” I pointed out. “I’m practically delirious.”

“But it's adorable,” Jisung soothed, dragging out one of my favorite sweaters.

“It’s embarrassing,” I countered. “You used to laugh at me.”

“I don’t anymore,” he teased, protesting when I took the sweater from him.

“Pick something else!”

Jisung tuttered, grabbing one of my jackets instead. “Your heat might hit tonight if you’re not careful.”

“I’m under control,” I assured him, but I still decided that sitting on the bed might be a better alternative to my incessant pacing.

“Changbin is really excited,” Jisung said, sniffing the collar of my jacket. “He hasn’t stopped talking about it all week.”

“Well, I hope he doesn’t have high expectations. You know how messy it gets.”

“I don’t think he’ll care, princess,” Jisung explained. “I think Changbin is just glad you’re trusting him with this.”

Leave it to Jisung to always remind me when I was acting irrationally.

-------------------------------------------------------------

“I haven’t had sex in two weeks,” I vented to Amelia the next morning, leaning against her body for support as we walked through the woods. 

“Join the club,” she muttered. “Hyunjin has been too busy with NCT.”

“Alphas,” I chimed in, grateful I had managed to convince my three to allow me permission to walk alone with Amelia for a while. 

“And Lila wants to mate one?” she grimaced. 

“She’d be better off alone,” I concurred, wondering if it was too late to convince Lila to dump Haechan and stay here with us.

Amelia sighed, “It’s hard to believe Jisung could say no to you.”

“That was before a lion tried to tear my leg off.”

“So they’ve friend-zoned you because of your injury?” Amelia queried, before nodding slowly. “That’s why they’ve been super aggressive lately. They haven’t had anyone to stick their knots in.”

“I’m not resisting,” I declared. “I wish I had faster heat cycles.”

Amelia laughed, “Trust me, you’re lucky you only get them 3 or 4 times a year. Heats always suck, even with a mate.”

“That’s true, and I can’t control anything I say or do. It gives the boys more blackmail against me.”

“Jisung or Chan, sure,” Amelia relented. “But I can’t possibly imagine Changbin saying anything. Isn’t his job to be brooding?”

He might be brooding, but Changbin liked to tease too.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I had fairly warned Changbin before my heat officially settled in. I told him that I’d probably say ridiculous things or act completely out of my element. He had laughed away my concerns. “I’ll take care of you, Angel.”

But I think he was still caught off-guard.

“Binnie,” I whined rather pathetically, a nickname I would later come to regret. I pawed at my sleeping mate, hand sneaking underneath the waistband of his sweatpants, squeezing at his cock. 

Changbin was slow to rise, letting out a low moan as he reached down for my hand. “What time is it?” he asked as if I could possibly know. Time became irrelevant when I was lost in my headspace. 

“I need a knot,” I told him, unrelenting in my efforts to get him hard, despite the look of exhaustion on his face. 

“Alright, angel,” Changbin groaned, forcing himself to crawl over top of me, leaning down to kiss me softly. 

But I didn’t want Changbin’s soft kisses. I wanted to feel the glide of his tongue against mine, and I really hated those stupid sweatpants he was wearing. I tugged at them, pulling at the drawstring while forcing my tongue past his lips. Changbin let out a noise of surprise, attempting to pull away, but was completely unprepared for the way I chased after him, grabbing him roughly by the scruff of his neck to hold him in place while I resumed our frantic kisses.

I was struggling with his sweatpants, trying to push them down enough to free what I really wanted. However, to my frustration, the material was caught on the swell of his ass, and Changbin was far too gone in our passionate kiss to understand why I was whining into his mouth. But he wasn’t able to ignore the sudden appearance of my tears.

“What’s wrong, Myah?” he asked, lips swollen as he looked me over, trying to figure out what was going on.

“Binnie,” I sniffled, grinding up against him, panting at the friction I was creating. “Why won’t you let me have it?”

Changbin pulled back and I let out a pathetic cry, reaching out for him, even as he gently guided my hands back to my chest. “I’ll make it better, angel,” he promised, and I watched with delight as he worked his sweatpants down his firm thighs, kicking them into the floor. I could finally see his cock, erect against his abdomen, and my inner wolf practically howled in delight. 

I instinctively released more pheromones and Changbin craned his neck back, eyes fluttering closed as the sweet smell started to cloud the air around us. I pushed his malleable form back against the bed, crawling down his body until I could pepper kisses around the sensitive skin of his thighs. I nosed my way closer to his arousal, the source of my desires, ready to do anything to get the knot my inner wolf craved.

Changbin let out a grunt when I took him into my mouth, tongue smoothly running over the leaking tip, tasting his bitter pre-cum. It was like Changbin was everywhere, his scent filling my nose while his taste coated my mouth, saliva dripping from my lips as I tried to take him in as much as I could, all the way down to the promising swell at his base.

“Myah,” Changbin warned, thrusting into my warm, eager mouth. 

I hummed around him, knowing he would appreciate my efforts, and I wanted desperately to please Changbin. Every instinct was screaming at me to give him pleasure because then he would give me his knot. 

Changbin growled, his scent shifting into something far more dominant, taking charge of the situation as he wrestled me onto my back, grabbing my hands and holding them above my head. “Look at you,” he sneered, teeth nipping at my jawline. They felt far sharper than usual and I knew I was in trouble.

Changbin made quick work of the rest of my clothes, hands gripping my thighs roughly as he parted them, breath hot against my folds. “Please,” I shamelessly begged him, and he didn’t tease, not like Jisung might have, but Changbin was always quick when it came to sex.

His tongue led a seductive trail up my slit and I watched with eager eyes as he lapped at my leaking arousal. He was growling again, sucking harshly at the tiny bud-shaped gland that brought the first wave of pleasure. I could feel it building in my abdomen, spreading all the way to my toes as they curled against the sheets. And as good as it felt, I knew Changbin could spend hours eating me out, and that’s not what I needed from him.

I told him as much, pulling harshly at his thick black hair, urging him to give me the knot that was still steadily growing the longer we kept up this intimate foreplay. “Is that what you want, angel?” he finally snarled, eliciting a sharp yelp from me when he suddenly flipped me over onto my stomach, manipulating me into place as he closed in behind me, giving me no warning before bottoming out in one well-calculated thrust.

And I could already feel the knot, dragging against my inner walls.

His powerful torso was pressing against my back, one hand supporting himself, while the other grabbed my breast, squeezing with more force than he probably meant to allow. But every move went straight to my impending orgasm, so I didn’t really care. His grunts were right next to my ear, and his body was touching mine everywhere. I was drowning in Changbin, but it satisfied my primal urges, especially once his knot caught on my entrance, unable to leave my body now that we were connected. The movement also snapped the delicate string holding my orgasm back and I was now sobbing into the mattress, chanting his name as he continued to grind himself inside, emptying his release as deep as he could manage.

“Binnie,” I cried, barely cognizant of his efforts to lay me down on my side, breathing heavily against the back of my neck. 

“I got you, angel,” he said, voice still husky from our coupling. 

“It’s good,” I trembled, sniffling back the promise of fresh tears as I clenched tightly around his engorged length. “Don’t take it.”

Changbin chuckled. “I can’t really do that right now, angel. It might take a while.”

“It’s mine,” I grumbled, instinctively leaning in closer to his warmth. “My knot.”

“Better than Jisung, right?” Changbin ventured, laughing when I nodded my head, arching my neck back just enough to inhale more of his scent. He released more of the pheromones I craved and I whimpered at its effect on my body. “Binnie, huh?” he suddenly questioned, hand smoothing its way down my hip. “I like it.” 

I started purring at his praise, which would have humiliated me under any other circumstances, but not when I felt so content. “I’m not going to let you forget this, Myah,” He snickered, digging his fingers into my fleshy thigh.

I was under a heat-induced coma and didn’t really care.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 6

NCT finally left after securing our alliance, and I was feeling down without Lila around. 

Amelia was far worse, lamenting the loss of her sister to anyone who was nearby. Hyunjin usually took the brunt of her tirades, listening with admirable patience. As for me, well I complained to my mates whenever they would listen because that was supposed to be part of their job description. Which is why I thoroughly voiced my complaints whenever it seemed like they were trying to tune me out.

Meanwhile, I was finally able to start walking again, but freedom came with a price and one of my mates was always lingering, watching me from afar. I started working in the kitchens again, grateful to return to something I felt passionate about in addition to my artwork. Life was resuming back to normal in the pack, a new alliance cause enough for celebration.

I even managed to talk Jisung out of his pants in the midst of the festivities. It was some of the best sex I’d ever experienced, leaving me breathless and aching in the places that had started to gather dust while I was still on the shelf. But I also knew complete normalcy would take a while, especially for Changbin who had actually been present to witness my gruesome injury.

Unfortunately, like all good things in life, the lighthearted moods soon came to an end when one of our border patrols returned to camp reporting suspicious scents. Chan, as head alpha, took the threats seriously, immediately going to investigate. Unsurprisingly, Changbin was already calling for blood before the situation had even been fully assessed.

My alpha mates rarely argued. In fact, I could only recall one real instance of a fight that had almost resulted in violence. It was almost bad enough to break apart the pack before we had even started:

-------------------------------------------------------------

Jisung was always more talkative after a good orgasm, especially when said ecstasy came courtesy of one of my coveted blow jobs. I was pressed into Jisung’s side, head resting on his chest as I listened to his heartbeat gradually slow to its normal gentle thud. “Have you talked to Chan about moving the new pack?”

Jisung and Changbin had originally claimed the rights to a nice patch of land along the eastern border, but after some more scouting from Felix and Minho, they decided to try somewhere further down the river. Personally, I liked the riverside land better because it was closer to the mountains. 

In response, Jisung grunted, carding his fingers through my hair. “Chan will agree with us. The new land has more prey.”

“How tempting,” I teased him. “Can we start moving in?”

Jisung chuckled. “Don’t be impatient, princess. We still haven’t decided on head alpha yet.”

“I thought you would just do it,” I said indifferently because it didn’t really seem like a big deal to me, but that was my first mistake.

Jisung tensed at my side. “It was my idea,” he grumbled, a faint growl underlying his tone.

I hesitated to speak any further on the subject, but I was concerned that my mates were having problems deciding who would lead our pack. “Is something wrong?”

“Don’t worry about it,” he said, leaving no room for further inquiry. Instead, he distracted me with a kiss.

-------------------------------------------------------------

And now, my three alphas were on edge again, disagreeing with one another on just about everything involving the potential threat. Changbin wanted to follow the scents and lead a preemptive attack while Chan insisted we should investigate first and try diplomacy. Meanwhile, Jisung wanted to call our new NCT allies back to fortify the camp, defending his belief that we required “strength in numbers.”

Of course, I was caught in the middle. The three boys currently hated one another and they didn’t want to share me at all. Changbin, being so much more in-sync with his wolf, was the worst, insisting I stay with him every night because he was, and I quote, “the only one competent enough to protect me.”

However, staying with Changbin at night only made things worse as I predicted they would. During the day, my mates would often corner me alone, scenting me so heavily that I grew light-headed. They were obviously trying to leave their mark on me, trying to outdo one another in this tedious argument they were stubbornly insisting on furthering. Nothing was being solved, and that only meant our pack was in constant danger from the potential threat at our borderlines.

The tension finally spilled over one afternoon after I had left the pack  to have a good run in the woods. I was feeling restless, especially as the entire pack remained on edge with the threats. I always found exercising to be relieving in a lot of different capacities, but I had also made a promise to myself to shift more often. I didn’t set out to worry anyone, which is why I was surprised to start feeling distress pulling at the edges of my mating bond. My wolf let out a whine as I turned back to camp, tasting the air and wondering if we were being attacked.

An invisible rope was tugging on my heart, urging me to return to camp, so I obeyed it, especially as it started to escalate my steadily pounding pulse. I trotted at a faster pace, slightly cautious in case something bad had happened while I was gone. Everything seemed perfectly normal this morning, and I vaguely recalled eating breakfast with Chan while trying to ignore the envious glares being sent in our direction from Jisung and Changbin. 

I hated it when my mates got competitive with one another as if my attention was a prize to be won. Lately, the three had been worse than usual, constantly looking to rile up the others with taunts and insults. Honestly, it would probably surprise anyone to hear that the three of them were supposedly best friends. 

A loud, threatening growl startled me into a sprint, racing down the mountainside to reach camp. Because I knew who that growl belonged to and Changbin wasn’t afraid to bare his teeth when he was angry. I skidded to a halt outside the perimeter of the main courtyard, eyes widening in surprise when I saw Changbin and Chan engaged in a vicious staredown, pacing around one another as if seeking an opening to attack. 

Jisung was still in his human form, looking quite frazzled as he attempted to pacify the two bigger wolves. Meanwhile, our other packmates looked on with trepidation. “What’s going on here?” I demanded, shifting pack to human form so that I could question Jisung. 

“Myah!” 

I braced myself as Jisung gathered me into his arms, holding me above ground as he buried his nose into my scent gland. His grip was unrelenting, and I could feel his fear through our mating bond. “What’s wrong?” I asked. However, before Jisung could answer, Changbin had broken his confrontation with Chan to intercede, letting out a growl which Jisung heeded, giving Changbin space to push his head against my side. “You’re too strong,” I reprimanded him, trying to push his giant head away to give myself more space. Instead, I found myself overwhelmed, falling onto my backside with an unattractive squeak that would normally lead to some sort of teasing from Jisung.

However, nothing was funny about this situation, especially when Chan’s wolf decided to read Changbin’s actions as aggressive. He came to my defense, knocking Changbin away with a threatening snarl, taking an unexpected protective stance in front of me, blocking me from everyone else’s view. “Channie,” I winced, feeling the soreness start to spread up my tailbone.

But Chan wasn’t listening to me. Instead, he was completely focused on Changbin, mirroring his threatening posture, haunches raised and teeth bared. I was completely helpless, stunned into silence while my two alpha mates continued to search for the perfect opening to attack. Meanwhile, Jisung was still trying to play peacekeeper, holding out his hands to show his surrender. “Chan,” he tried, “this isn’t really the best time to fight with Changbin.” Chan’s giant silver-haired wolf snapped in Jisung’s direction and I watched my mate roll his eyes. “You’re supposed to be the mature one!”

“Why are they like this?” I asked Jisung, slowly rising to my feet despite the flaring pain from my unexpected fall.

“We couldn’t find you this morning,” Jisung pouted. “Changbin blamed Chan because he was the last one to see you. I didn’t think it would escalate so fast.”

“This is irresponsible,” I snapped, reaching out to dig my fingers into Chan’s side. “Stop it, Chan! I’m being serious.”Chan’s wolf turned to look at me, a message to stay back clearly illuminated in the brilliant flecks of his irises. “You’re supposed to be the leader! Why don’t you act like it?”

Chan let out a whine as he gently nudged his head against me. “Lay off, Changbin,” Jisung growled from somewhere to my right.

“Can I talk to you, please?” I asked Chan. “As a human?”

Chan’s look could only be described as chastened once he started to shift back, pale skin replacing his silvery-colored fur. He immediately wrapped me into his arms, one hand buried in my hair as he forced his nose against my scent gland. “You scared me.”

“And you scared me,” I retorted, glaring over his shoulder at Changbin who must have also shifted back at some point. However, unlike Chan, Changbin seemed completely unapologetic, rage still darkening his features. 

“Where were you this morning?”

“I went for a walk.”

“By yourself? When there are rogue wolves wandering our borderlines?”

I huffed at Changbin’s attitude, wrestling free from Chan’s unrelenting grip so that I could face my furious mate. “I don’t need permission.”

“No, but you could have at least given us some courtesy,” Changbin argued, folding his arms in a way that told me he was closing himself off, completely set on whatever wrongdoing he had decided I committed.

“I’m sorry,” I offered, hoping to appease everyone, especially since several of our packmates still loitered around, despite Jisung’s command for them to return to their assignments. “But the two of you shouldn’t be fighting.”

“This isn’t something we should have to worry about,” Changbin continued. “But Chan doesn’t seem to understand the gravity of our situation. Our lead alpha has grown soft.”

Chan let out a little growl as he pushed me behind him. “I’m doing the best I can. We don’t know anything about these wolves.”

“Exactly,” Changbin grunted. “We shouldn’t underestimate them.”

“And I’m not,” Chan insisted. “I already agreed with Jisung’s plan to call back NCT for reinforcements.”

“It’s not enough,” Changbin snarled. “We should put that numbers advantage to good use.”

“By slaughtering rogue wolves who are likely just passing through the territory?”

“And what if they aren’t? How do you know they won’t attack?”

“I don’t know! But neither do you.”

“How would you feel if one of them attacked Myah?” Changbin challenged and a chilling silence fell over the four of us. 

“Are you saying I would put my mate in danger?” Chan eventually asked as he took a step forward in Changbin’s direction.

Changbin held his ground. “She’s my mate too and that’s why I’ve done everything in my power to make sure she stays safe. I let her out of my sight this morning, entrusting her to your care, and she goes missing! While rogue wolves are sniffing around our borders!” Changbin snarled as his eyes flashed a dangerous red. “You better handle the attacks before I have to intervene.”

-------------------------------------------------------------

NCT arrived the very next morning, and I chose to stay in bed in an attempt to appease my mates who had been far too unpredictable since their unexpected confrontation from the previous morning. Amelia somehow managed to sneak into my room, talking animatedly about the impressive size of the NCT pack. “There’s so many of them!” she said. “They easily outnumber our pack.”

“I bet Chan isn’t happy about that,” I said, half-heartedly swirling the contents of my glass. The orange juice seemed rather unappealing.

“Of course not,” Amelia said. “But neither is Changbin.”

“Changbin won’t be satisfied until we’re somehow living in recluse from the rest of society.”

“Is that what he’s told you?”

I smirked. “Did Lila come with them?”

“Haechan made her stay behind, but you can’t really blame him. It’s not like they’re coming here for a vacation.”

“Have they been out on patrol yet?”

“Chan’s organized one for tonight. Apparently, he’s letting Changbin lead.”

“That’s hard to believe,” I scoffed. “They haven’t agreed on much lately.”

“Hyunjin thinks it’s just some passing rogues,” Amelia said. “They’ll probably move on in the next day or so.”

“They haven’t initiated any sort of aggressive action,” I agreed. “I hope their scents fade so the pack can settle back down.”

“So your mates can get along again?” Amelia teased. “I haven’t seen them this angry since Chan became head alpha.”

I shivered as I recalled the distant memory. “I thought we were going to lose Changbin.”

“Lose him?” Amelia questioned. “What do you mean?”

It was all too easy to remember:

-------------------------------------------------------------

“Where are you going, angel?” Changbin purred as his hands tightened around my waist, pulling me back against his naked chest to halt my efforts in escaping.

I winced because the truth would likely only set off another angry tirade, a frequent occurrence these days. Changbin had been especially moody lately, ever since Chan and Jisung decided our new head alpha would fall to one of them. Chan had argued that Changbin was too quick-tempered to be a leader while Jisung claimed Changbin acted quite irrationally when it came to protecting those he cared about. “I’m meeting with my parents.”

“Today?” Changbin whined, nose finding its way to my scent gland. “I’ll come with you.”

So much for lying. But my attempt was not in vain because if Changbin heard I was meeting Chan and Jisung later, he’d likely hold me hostage in his bedroom just to spite the other alphas. Or, worse yet, insist he come along to the meeting and that would not be in anyone’s best interest. “Changbin,” I tried instead, hitching one leg over his hip. “Remember what happened the last time you met my parents?”

Changbin grunted as I laved my tongue across his pulse point. “What?”

I grinned, feeling his cock heavy against my thigh. “You asked my father for his permission to take me from his pack.”

“Did I?”

I pressed a delicate kiss to the sensitive underside of his sharp jawline. “I don’t think my father liked the idea of you “taking” me anywhere.”

“It could've been worse.”

“You told my sister she should run away with her rogue boyfriend.”

“You should always follow your heart!”

I stifled a laugh as I gripped his cock hard. “Maybe I should handle my parents alone today.”

“Yeah,” Changbin replied breathily, eyes closed against the ministrations of my fingers smoothing up and down. He leaned in closer to press a sweet kiss against the side of my mouth, a stark contradiction to his next words: “But I want to fuck you first.”

I was more than willing to agree.

I only wished later in hindsight that I had been honest with him from the start.

Jisung was feeling extra affectionate that afternoon, crowding me onto his lap as he nuzzled the back of my neck, inhaling my scent. Meanwhile, Chan was impatiently trying to organize our pack members, several straggling in at the last minute. “This is an important decision,” Chan scolded Jeongin, the younger wolf whimpering as he passively accepted my alpha’s sharp words.

“Don’t be mean to him,” I spoke through our mind-link, ignoring Chan’s low growl in response.

“Where’s Felix?” 

“He said he might be late,” Jisung answered absent-mindedly, nipping at the edge of my ear. He was far calmer than Chan despite the circumstances of our pack’s summoning.

“Minho,” Chan growled. “Are you taking notes?”

“The meeting hasn’t started yet,” Minho grumped, frowning in Chan’s direction.

Chan looked at Minho incredulously, eyes narrowed, ready to undoubtedly reprimand the younger wolf. However, the abrupt sound of knocking at the door to the main room prevented more unnecessarily harsh words. “Finally,” Chan muttered, and I grinned as Jisung mocked his voice in my ear. At least one of my mates was proving why he would make a good leader.

“Changbin.”

I froze on Jisung’s lap, feeling the alpha beneath me tense considerably at the mention of the older wolf. Slowly, I glanced at the doorway, shivering when I saw Changbin and Felix standing shoulder to shoulder. Chan’s previous mask of hardened resolved had melted away, leaving behind an expression of shock that likely resembled Jisung’s. 

 “What’s going on?” Felix asked, confusion evident as he took in the frazzled states of our packmates.

“I guess I wasn’t invited,” Changbin said coldly, squaring up to Chan as he fixed the older with a fierce look. “Was I not gonna be apart of the vote?” 

Felix glanced away sheepishly as if finally realizing his mistake. And Chan could only struggle for the right words as he found himself in a vulnerable position. But the most heartbreaking moment happened a beat later when Changbin met my gaze from across the room. Disappointed.

-------------------------------------------------------------

“But Changbin obviously forgave you,” Amelia said, noticing the long pause in my story. 

“I shouldn’t have lied to him,” I said, sighing as I reclined back against my bed.

“Everything worked out,” Amelia nodded, tilting her head to the side when a deep voice cleared from the other side of my bedroom door. “Who is it?”

Felix stuck his head inside, eyes wide as they moved back and forth between us. “Felix,” I sighed, “what do my mates want now?”

“NCT recognized their scents!”

Amelia sat up, leaning forward in her chair. “But what does that mean?”

Felix shifted anxiously. “Taeyong said the intruders are a group of former NCT pack members who left several months ago. They’re looking for new land.”

“NCT knows them?”

“There are five rogues,” Felix said, “but they’re trying to recruit more.” He cleared his throat, checking over his shoulder as if expecting someone to overhear. “We might have a war on our hands.”

-------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 7

Changbin might pretend to be indifferent, but it’s only because he had always been taught to act and behave in a certain way. His father was strict, adamant that Changbin disguise those weak emotions with strength and endurance instead. However, try as one might, there was only so much a person could take until they reached their inevitable breaking point.

And Changbin had found his in our betrayal. An attempt to keep him in the shadows, ignorant of pack politics while Jisung and Chan fought for the right to call themselves head alpha. But when Changbin found out, he could no longer hide his anger and disappointment, storming out of the room and leaving behind a string of curses.

And that’s how I found him later, standing at the edge of the clearing while gazing out into the empty woods. Perhaps that’s how Changbin felt inside: empty and alone because his packmates had so clearly disregarded his feelings. My mates thought they were doing the right thing, but seldom is the right decision an easy one to make.

“I’m sorry I lied to you,” I said later on while gripping tightly to his arm. 

Changbin shook his head, looking off into the horizon. The sun was setting, a faint pinkish glow illuminating the sky. “I get it,” he said. “They didn’t want me as head alpha.”

I trembled. “Changbin,” I started, “don’t think so low of yourself.”

“Am I even worthy of being your mate?” he asked, self-deprecating, ignoring my small gasp as he pulled his arm free from my hold.

-------------------------------------------------------------

“Jisung,” I said firmly, glaring down at the squirming male in question. “You’d better tell me what’s going on.”

Jisung cleared his throat, refusing to look at me. “Chan doesn’t want you involved.”

“Yeah?” I questioned, bending down to grab his chin, forcing our eye contact. “If you expect me to help you with your rut next month, then you’ll tell me everything that’s happened with the rogues.”

Jisung’s accompanying expression was one of absolute betrayal. “You would let me suffer?”

I rolled my eyes. “You have a working hand don’t you?”

Jisung scoffed. “I’m not gonna masturbate through my rut like a teenage boy.”

“And what has Changbin been doing all this time?” I smirked. “He never let me help before and he was perfectly fine.”

“Maybe he’s okay with that,” Jisung shot back. “You shouldn’t use that as blackmail! Chan has his reasons for keeping you in the dark.”

“I’m sure he does,” I argued. “He probably thinks he’s protecting me somehow.” I shook my head because Chan was far too stubborn. “It’s really embarrassing when the other females ask me about the situation, but I have no idea what to tell them.”

“The patrols are handling it.”

“Jisung, you just invited another pack into our territory! It doesn’t exactly scream that we have everything under control, does it?”

Jisung pouted. “Please don’t make me tell you. The three of us haven’t been able to get along lately. If I disobeyed an order from Chan, I’d get dragged into the same mess as Changbin!”

“Fine,” I shrugged. “But I hope you like sleeping alone tonight.”

“Myah,” Jisung whined, even as I was already slamming the door to his bedroom shut behind me.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Chan was clearly busy when I approached him later that day. He was conversing sternly with Taeyong, the NCT pack leader. I decided to hold back, waiting for the two of them to finish their business. I knew I would be much less likely to get information from Chan if I interrupted his talk with Taeyong. You see, Chan was acting much more serious lately, a result of him taking full responsibility as the pack’s head alpha. I was proud of him for holding his responsibilities in such high regard, but I was also a little disappointed with the friction it was causing between his best friends. 

Taeyong offered me a delicate bow as he walked by. I waited until he was out of hearing range before confronting Chan. “There you are, Myah,” Chan greeted me, touching his nose to my scent gland before frowning. “You smell like Jisung.”

“I saw him this morning.”

Chan huffed, taking a step back. “The two of you shouldn’t have sex so close to his next rut. It might trigger it early.”

“We weren’t having sex,” I said, annoyed with Chan’s possessiveness. “Am I not allowed to see my mates now without your permission?”

Chan’s eyes narrowed slightly. “Did you come here to fight?”

“Of course not,” I sighed. “But I have a feeling you’re not in the mood to hear me out.”

“It’s my job to listen to you,” Chan said. “What’s on your mind?”

“The rogues.”

Chan shook his head, gazing off somewhere behind me. “You don’t need to worry about the rogues.”

“Channie,” I argued, going right for his weak spot. “Don’t you think I should know? I’m the pack alpha’s mate and I can’t even tell the other members anything!”

“That isn’t your job,” Chan insisted. “They shouldn’t be so nosy. I’ll hold a pack meeting tonight.”

“There’s no need for that,” I countered. “Unless you’re finally gonna tell us what’s really going on with the borders. I bet Taeyong told his pack.”

Chan winced at the remark. “Actually, Taeyong hasn’t said anything. Only Mark understands what’s going on, and that’s because he personally knows the wolves involved.”

“Does he?” I asked, sensing a potential opening. “What did he say?”

But Chan was tight-lipped. “If you see Changbin later, tell him I’ve been looking for him.”

I growled in frustration as Chan walked by, completely ignoring me as he joined Mark and another NCT wolf who had started in our direction. “Asshole,” I told him, making sure to add as much bitterness as one could through a mind-link.

I went in search of Changbin next, inquiring of his whereabouts from a few lingering pack members. My tsundere mate liked to make himself scarce when things were tense around camp. I figured he probably went hunting or something, but there was no way I was following him into the mountains this time. 

Surprisingly, Jeongin told me that Changbin had been in his cabin all day. “I tried to talk to him earlier,” the younger member said. “But he wouldn’t listen to me.”

I suppose I wasn’t the only victim to Changbin’s moodiness.

Still, I was expecting more difficulty when I knocked on his cabin door and asked if I could come inside. Changbin was quick to acquiesce, flinging open the door with enough force to knock it against the wall, sending me jumping into the air in response. “What the hell was that for?” I asked while allowing him to drag me inside his cabin. 

His unexpectedly gentle kiss was my response, lips sliding across mine smoothly. “I feel like shit,” Changbin said, pulling away to rest his feverish head against mine.

“Binnie,” I soothed, omega instincts kicking in as I led him to his bed. “Are you sick?”

“Just caught something,” Changbin grumbled, refusing to let go of me as he dragged us down on top of the mattress. 

“You’re really hot,” I commented, fitting my palm over his forehead. “Are you hurting?”

“It’s not that bad, Angel,” Changbin said, rumbling softly as he drug his nose across my neck. “You smell like Jisung.”

I tried not to roll my eyes. “His rut is close.”

“You’ll smell like me after this,” Changbin declared proudly as if wearing his sickly scent around camp was something to appreciate. 

“You reek,” I informed him. “Your scent is stronger than usual.”

Changbin’s breath was warm against my throat. “You’ll stay with me, right angel?”

“Of course,” I agreed, sliding my fingers through his sweat-drenched hair. “I just hope Chan doesn't come looking for us.”

Changbin tensed at the mention of Chan. “Isn’t he too busy kissing Taeyong’s ass?”

“Binnie,” I scolded the younger, frowning at the way he burrowed closer. 

“We don’t need them,” Changbin growled, scenting me headily. “We can handle the rogues ourselves.”

“I think Chan wanted to talk to you about the rogues,” I said. “He sure as hell never told me anything,” I added, almost as an afterthought.

“Chan was pissed when he found out that Felix said something about their relationship to NCT,” Changbin admitted. “He doesn’t want anyone else knowing.”

“Why not?” I asked, running my fingertips across Changbin’s puffy cheeks. “Shouldn’t the pack have the right to know?”

“Chan’s orders,” Changbin said, teeth gritted. “He’s pack alpha after all.”

“You voted for him, remember?” 

“Only after he tried to keep me out of it,” Changbin replied, wrapping an arm around my waist. 

“He thought he was doing the right thing,” I said in response. “Why don’t you take your shirt off? It might help you cool down.”

“Is this your way of getting me naked?” Changbin grinned. “I’ll do it for you, angel.”

“Stop it,” I scolded him, pulling away only to help wrestle the constricting material from his torso. “Have you seen Woojin yet?”

“I’ll see him if I feel worse tomorrow,” Changbin said, biceps flexing enticingly as he stretched his arms above his head. 

“He might prevent you from feeling worse,” I said, forcing my eyes away from the unexpectedly attractive sight.

“It’s probably nothing,” Changbin assured me, hands smoothing down his broad chest. “Winter is starting to settle in.”

“An excuse to stay in bed longer,” I said, finding myself leaning into his warmth.

Changbin was quiet for a while, and I figured he had fallen asleep. As a matter of fact, I found myself growing drowsy with the combination of his heat and the comfort of the mattress beneath me. I was moments away from closing my eyes when he spoke up again. “I saw the new pups yesterday,” he said.

It was enough to surprise me into alertness. “Mina’s pups?”

He nodded. “I went with Jisung.”

I grinned. “You should have brought me along. I’ve been looking for a better excuse to see them.”

One of our older pack members had recently given birth to three little pups. They were absolutely adorable with their small eyes and cute little button noses. Amelia and I had spent more time there than the kitchens. It was starting to become a problem, especially when Mina’s mate was less than willing to share their cabin with other wolves. But how could anyone resist the heart-wrenching sounds of their precious giggles?

“Do you like pups?” Changbin asked.

“Of course I love pups!” I exclaimed, turning on my side to rest my chin on top of his chest. “Mina’s are so tiny! How can anything be that small?”

Changbin’s eyes met mine and I was taken aback by the raw emotion I saw reflecting back at me. “Maybe you should stop taking your pills.”

I paused, studying him closely. His implication was clear. “Are you serious?”

Changbin nodded. “Maybe on your next heat we can all try.”

His sincerity was unexpected as Changbin was the last mate I thought would inquire about having pups. I knew Jisung adored pups and he was always one of the first to see any new additions to our pack. I usually trailed along after him, adoring the look of glee in his eyes when he held a tiny pup in his strong arms. And as for Chan? Well, my oldest mate liked pups well enough and had considered in passing the idea of having pups of his own one day.

But Changbin?

“Have you talked to the others?” I asked.

“No,” Changbin grunted. “But we haven’t exactly been friendly recently.”

I nodded. “After this mess with the rogues is sorted out, maybe we can all sit down together and talk about it. I don’t want to try when the three of you are fighting.”

Changbin grinned as he practically drug me on top of him. “Okay,” he said, pecking my nose sweetly. “But I get the first knot.”

I groaned at his words, feeling the tight bulge of his cock underneath the thin layer of his worn sweatpants.

-------------------------------------------------------------

The following day, I decided to go hunting with Jisung and Changbin. The elder was feeling better after spending the day isolated away from the pack, and Changbin told me he desperately needed to shift again. Meanwhile, Jisung was feeling just as adventurous, hearing of our plans and demanding to come along. Changbin protested at first, but eventually gave in when I sternly reminded him how important it was for us to all get along. Changbin must have remembered my words from yesterday, immediately complying with Jisung’s wishes.

The three of our wolves padded together along the used trails in the woods, keeping close to camp. It was still potentially dangerous to go out past the edges of the territory when rogues were threatening our pack. However, I knew Changbin would be the last person to refuse his wolf’s obvious attachment to the woods, and Changbin was never intimidated by threats.

And I also longed to stretch my legs and have a nice run through the woods.

Nevertheless, my senses were on high alert as I walked between my two mates. My wolf was minuscule in comparison to Jisung and Changbin, but it was reassuring to know my mates were so much stronger. They would always protect me if danger happened to arise.

Changbin let out a bark as he picked up on a stray scent, nose high in the air as he caught the trail. “This way,” he directed, leading the three of us into a nearby thicket of bushes.

I kept my body close to the ground, hindquarters raised, as I waited for Changbin’s next command. “Why is your ass sticking up,” Jisung teased, nipping at my ear playfully.

“This is the hunter’s stance,” I quipped, ears pricked forward as a faint rustle echoed throughout the surrounding foliage.

“Leave the hunting to the professionals, princess,” Jisung said, stopping to shoulder himself next to Changbin. “What is it?”

“Deer,” Changbin said, tasting the air carefully. “A small doe, maybe.”

Jisung dugs his claws into the forest floor as if anticipating the impending hunt. “Should we take it, Changbin?”

“I could wrestle it down without you,” Changbin grumbled.

Jisung’s wolf huffed as if offended. “I’d overpower it easily!”

“Go ahead,” Changbin challenged, suddenly sitting back on his haunches. “If you’re so skilled at hunting bigger prey.”

Jisung hesitated, but he was far too proud to let Changbin bruise his ego. I watched Jisung crouch down, stealthily moving through the underbrush as he slowly approached the doe who was barely visible through the branches of the trees crowding the area surrounding us. I withheld my laughter as I sat down next to Changbin, allowing him to nuzzle into the side of my neck affectionately. “He’s not low enough,” he told me. “The deer will hear him before he’s ready.”

I watched with interest, silently rooting for Jisung to prove Changbin wrong as he edged closer. Unfortunately, Changbin was rarely wrong in such instances, and I winced when Jisung’s front paw broke a stick beneath his path. Immediately, the deer’s head shot up into the air, eyes blown wide as it studied the nearby vicinity. Jisung panicked, launching himself into a premature attack, barely glancing the deer with his claws before the now spooked creature took off. Jisung was quick to recover his footing, but still not fast enough to track down an animal relying on adrenaline racing through familiar territory.

“Shit!” Jisung cursed as he finally slowed down, watching the deer race away through the woods.

“Nice job,” Changbin snarked, ignoring Jisung as he turned around to look for a new trail.

Jisung held his head down as he passed me. 

“There’s another scent up ahead,” Changbin said, suddenly shifting back to his human form. 

I shifted behind him, confused as to why he had suddenly switched. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong,” he said, beckoning me forward.

I stood next to him, gazing down into the ravine. “It’s beautiful.”

“I’ve seen better,” Changbin grinned, and I rolled my eyes at his cheesy flirtation.

“I almost had that deer!” Jisung abruptly growled, shoving his way between us, arms crossed over his chest.

“Your stance is lacking,” Changbin said, chuckling when Jisung shoved him harshly. “You need more hunting experience.”

“I have more important things to do,” Jisung defended himself, looking in my direction with pitiful eyes. “I’ve been busy with pack stuff.”

“Poor baby,” I cooed. “Maybe you just needed a practice run. You can always try again.”

“I picked up a faint scent on the trail we came up,” Changbin said, nodding to his right. “It might be a smaller doe.”

Jisung followed Changbin and I lingered behind, taking a few more moments to admire the simplistic beauty of our mountain home. “I smell it!” Jisung declared, shifting back to his dusky brown wolf as his nose sniffed across the dirt floor.

“See if you can track it,” Changbin suggested and Jisung needed no further encouragement, determined to make up for his previous blunder. 

I could hear him take off down the trail, feet thundering against the forest floor, purpose driving his steps. In the meantime, I could feel Changbin’s familiar presence as he approached from behind, nose touching the back of my neck while his strong arms wrapped around my middle.

“I really want to fuck you,” Changbin smirked, tucking my hair behind my ear. I studied the trail where Jisung had disappeared into the ravine.

“Is this really an appropriate time?” I asked as he turned me around.

“He’s gone,” Changbin grinned. “And what else are we gonna do?”

“Hunt.”

“I can catch us enough prey,” Changbin bragged, leaning in closer, thumbing at the neckline of my shirt. “Your tits look good in this.”

“What a compliment.”

“Myah,” Changbin pouted, slowly forcing me back. I allowed him to do so until my back met the rough bark of a nearby tree. “We haven’t had sex in a while.”

“If you were more patient,” I started, brushing my fingers against his gorgeous lips. “We could have sex tonight when we get back to camp.”

“Are you worried about Jisung?” Changbin asked, raising one brow in question.

“You aren’t?” I countered because the idea of Jisung stumbling upon Changbin fucking me against a tree was not exactly sexy.

“He’s not gonna know,” Changbin purred in my ear, reaching for the hem of my skirt. “I sent him after a stale scent. He’ll be searching for a while.”

“Was this your plan all along?” I indulged, allowing him to run his fingers up my bare thigh.

“No,” Changbin shrugged, fingers digging into my flesh. “But you smell really good today.”

“Do I normally smell bad?” I joked, wrapping my hands around his impressive biceps.

He flexed them on purpose. “I love your scent.”

I rolled my eyes playfully. “Changbin, don’t you think this is reckless?”

“I won’t let anything bad happen to you, angel,” he promised, looking for the right words to try and convince me to give in to his demands.

I was close to arguing again before he suddenly lifted me up, forcing my legs to wrap around his waist as he brought our bodies close together. He was unbelievably hard, cock straining against the material of his shorts. “Have you wanted this for a while?” I asked breathily because he was scenting me with purpose, determined to wipe all logical thoughts from my mind.

I barely noticed when his hands managed to push my skirt up my legs, thumbs rubbing circles into my hip bones.

“I think my wolf was jealous of Jisung,” Changbin admitted, mouthing at the exposed expanse of my chest. “He wants our scent on you.”

“And what better way,” I grinned, curling my fingers through his thick hair.

“You know I like it, angel,” he continued, hips pushing forward into mine. 

“We need to be fast,” I gasped, feeling the burning friction of his fingers as he moved my panties out of the way.

“Take me out,” he growled, eyes trained down as I worked his shorts and underwear down his legs, leaving his cock erect as he worked to support his hands under my thighs.

“Put it in,” I found myself begging, feeling his cock, warm and thick, as he moved us into the perfect position, tip threatening entrance.

And Changbin never needed me to beg for his cock, all too willing to give me whatever I wanted when it meant nothing but pleasure. Which is why I found myself moaning the moment he pushed his way inside, filling me with him slowly, a leisurely pace as if testing my patience. But I eventually learned patience throughout the years of satisfying my mates, so I simply waited until he was all the way inside, pressing against my clit with a wonderful pressure.

And with my skirt bundled up at my waist, legs wrapped around Changbin’s waist, feeling his powerful hands support my thighs with a bruising grip, I gave in to his wishes. It was all too easy to fall victim to his dark energy, and I choked on a sob as his cock moved in and out. He started a powerful rhythm that made it difficult to do anything more than toss my head back against the trunk of the tree, accepting whatever he decided to give me, which was always everything he had coiled tightly in the thick muscles that filled out his body.

“It’s good,” I made sure to tell him, praising him because I knew it would only get better the more I fed his ego, his desire to show off his strength for his mate.

But Changbin still had more demands.

“Show them to me,” Changbin begged, eyes glued to my chest. 

I tried to ignore him, scenting across his throat, teeth scraping along his skin. His dark, spicy smell was driving my omega crazy, and my wolf howled at me to bite him again. It was difficult to resist, so I gave in, gently digging my teeth against the taut flesh of his shoulder blade. “Angel,” Changbin grunted, cock stuttering inside. “Are you listening to me?”

I whined when he slowed down, dragging out with a pace that was not nearly as satisfying. “Don’t stop,” I begged him, trying to force him back inside, pushing down against his grip on my legs. 

He shifted me down, one of my feet touching the ground as his other hand continued to support most of my weight. I focused on taking in more oxygen as he tugged down my top, forcing my breasts to spill out. “That’s fucking hot,” he cursed, lifting me back up before forcing me down onto his thick cock.  

“Come inside,” I begged him, rapidly approaching my release, feeling it build deep inside.

“Are you worried Jisung might see?” Changbin teased, sweat glistening beautifully across his dark skin. 

“I-I’m not,” I managed, eyes closed tightly together as my hands ran across the broad expanse of his chest, feeling his muscles beneath the fabric of his shirt, straining with his efforts.

“He’d come in his pants like a little bitch,” Changbin snarled, mouth moving harshly across my breasts, tongue frequently taking the liberty to tease my sensitive nipples. 

I could feel his knot growing, threatening to lock us together. It was enough to finally break me out of my pheromone-induced haze. “Changbin,” I said, “you can’t knot me out here.”

Changbin groaned, nipping at his mating mark on my neck. “Can I come inside your mouth?”

“Absolutely,” I agreed breathily, unable to stop from moaning when my orgasm suddenly hit courtesy of a well-timed thrust from Changbin, knot catching slightly on my entrance.

He growled, pulling out completely before helping me settle onto my knees in front of him. “Fuck, I like you this way, angel,” he whispered, hands wrapping into my hair.

I didn’t answer, opening my mouth to allow him access. His cock sat heavy on my tongue and I hollowed my cheeks, lips stretching to accommodate him, pausing at the swell of his arousal. It didn’t take long for Changbin to finally cum, releasing down my throat, bitter but satisfying. He finally pulled out slowly, flaccid length falling from my reddened lips. 

We were both trying to catch our breath as we adjusted our clothes, trying to hide the evidence of our coupling. Unfortunately, when Changbin leaned in closer to kiss me, I could easily smell our sex permeating his scent. Jisung might not have Changbin’s superior sense of smell, but even a human could catch on to what we had been doing.

“We might be in trouble,” Changbin said, grinning against my wet skin.

After a while, I could hear the faint sound of Jisung’s paws against the underbrush. “He’s gonna smell us.”

“He’ll get you all to himself in a few weeks,” Changbin said, pressing one more lingering kiss to his mating mark.

I laughed when Jisung came into view, shifting into his human form. “He’s gonna be pissed.”

“I don’t care,” Changbin declared, holding me tightly against him, as if afraid to let go.

I merely laughed when Jisung immediately scrunched his nose as he came closer, the heavy smell of our sex assaulting the air surrounding us.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 8

Fear.

I felt it strongly, almost overbearing, as I followed the strong scent of blood. I whined when I finally saw him, barely cognizant, fur matted into thick knots as Felix and Minho carefully pulled him through camp. Jisung and Changbin were close, agitation evident in the harsh way their tails flicked back and forth. I snarled loudly, drawing the attention of the other wolves as I tried to fight my way through the gathered crowd of my packmates. 

Jisung wordlessly interceded, blocking me from the sight of my mangled alpha mate. “He needs me,” I pleaded with him, but my strength was no match for Jisung’s. 

“They’re coming,” Jisung warned, and it was only then I finally realized that I had been detecting his fear all along. But he wasn’t afraid for Chan despite his worsening condition.

He was afraid for me.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Before

“Do you feel better?” I whispered to my exhausted mate.

He hooked his leg around my hip, accommodating the knot keeping up locked together. “The fever broke,” he offered in response, voice husky as he touched his nose to my scent gland. 

“I don’t think I could handle it again,” I groaned. “I need a bath.”

“Are you hurting?” he asked, instinctively releasing a familiar calming pheromone. My eyelids were heavy.

“I’m fine,” I assured him. “It wasn’t too much.”

Jisung groaned from behind me. “I’ve been worried about the rogues,” he admitted. “I was probably rough.”

“You weren’t as rough as Changbin,” I whispered, wincing as I recalled Changbin’s most recent rut cycle.

Jisung chuckled. “Changbin told me something interesting the other day.”

“Really?”

Jisung let out a low rumble as his hand trailed along my side, fingers smoothing across my stomach. “He said you were thinking about pups.”

“Did he?” I asked groggily, shivering when he tugged at his knot, detecting resistance from the engorged base.

“Do you want to have pups?” 

“I’d like to,” I said. “I really want one.”

“Just one?” he whispered, kissing my shoulder.

“I haven’t exactly thought this through.”

“You shouldn’t have to,” Jisung said. “But between the three of us, I hope you have more than one.”

“Is that some sort of innuendo?”

“We’d have to plan for one of your heats,” Jisung continued thoughtfully. “Are we gonna take turns? Take you one night each?”

“Binnie wants the first knot.”

“Of course he does,” Jisung growled possessively. “But that doesn’t guarantee that he’ll have better chances.”

“Aren’t you being a little crude?” I asked him, reaching down for the hand still wavering around my stomach. “Does it really matter?”

“We’d never know,” Jisung acquiesced. “Have you talked to Chan about it?”

“No,” I muttered. “It’s hard to talk to him about anything other than the rogues.”

“He’s worried,” Jisung said. “But I think it’s making the whole pack nervous.”

“I haven’t spent time alone with Chan in a long time,” I said. “I’m not even sure he sleeps anymore.”

“Well, you shouldn’t worry,” Jisung assured me. “The three of us will take care of everything. As soon as the rogues are gone, we’ll be back to normal.”

“You and Changbin aren’t acting different,” I said, recalling my last disagreement with Chan, watching my alpha ignore me in favor of another pack’s beta.

“Changbin didn’t get his way with the rogues,” Jisung offered as an explanation. “And I’ve always been the most rational.”

I snickered at his comment, whining when he finally tugged his knot free. I immediately turned on my side, searching for his warmth. “Should I confront Chan?”

“He’d never ignore you on purpose,” Jisung said. “He just needs some time to figure out what to do.”

“He’s had more than enough time for that,” I said, slowly losing my battle with the impending promise of sleep.

-------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning, I allowed Amelia to talk me into an impromptu babysitting job for Mina’s pups while the she-wolf in question and her mate spent some time alone together. Jisung’s rut had broken at some point during the night and Chan had immediately ordered him back to work, sending him on a patrol in the lower valley. I, for one, was grateful for something to occupy my time, which explains why I was currently laid on the carpet of Mina’s cabin, allowing her rapidly growing pups to crawl over my still weakened body. “Leo,” Amelia chastised the younger boy who had abruptly shifted to his wolf form, teeth caught on my t-shirt. “You can’t chew on that.”

“I give up,” I declared, watching the younger pup with vague interest. “They can do whatever they want.”

“There’s only three of them,” Amelia sighed, wrestling one of the male pups away from his protesting sister.

“I feel sorry for Mina,” I said, startling slightly when I detected laughter from the doorway. 

I glared at Felix. “What?”

“I don’t think that’s how it works,” he said, graciously saving my t-shirt from Leo’s sharp teeth.

“Have you ever done this before?” a new voice inquired, and I gazed up at Seungmin helplessly. 

“Does it look like we know what we’re doing?”

“They were cuter when they couldn’t walk,” Amelia added, holding Mina’s little girl close to her chest as she cried openly about her brother’s prior attack.

Felix sat down across from Leo, laughing as the younger pup immediately began chasing his tail. “They’re completely harmless.”

“Harmless?” Amelia frowned. “They’re little devils!”

“Devils?” Seungmin snorted, eagerly picking up the other male pup. Immediately, the pup nuzzled in closer to Seungmin, sniffing along his neck. “You have to discipline them.”

“They don’t listen,” Amelia insisted, groaning when the pup in her arms started whining for attention.

Leo had paused in the adventure he made of chasing his tail, sniffing the air with interest. “What is it?” Felix asked, cutesy voice almost overbearing to hear.

“Don’t talk like that,” I grumbled, rolling over onto my stomach.

“She’s not nice, right Leo?” Felix continued, ignorant to my suffering. “Are you being a good boy?”

The pup chirped happily as it fixed its attention on Felix. “You babysit then,” Amelia insisted, situating the pup in her arms onto my lower back. I groaned loudly at the additional weight pressing down.

“We never said we would,” Seungmin pointed out, allowing the wriggling pup in his arms free. Leo watched the movement and decided he was going to attack his younger brother, jumping onto the other unsuspecting pup rather ungracefully.

“Let’s take them outside,” Felix suggested, perhaps taking pity on Amelia and I. “They can run off their energy.”

I watched out of the corner of my eye as Felix carefully lifted Leo, patiently withstanding the pup’s insistent wriggling. “Felix,” Amelia cried dramatically. “You’re my hero!”

Seungmin rolled his eyes but reluctantly lifted the other male pup, following Felix’s lead. Meanwhile, Amelia had relieved me of the burdening weight of Mina’s youngest girl, hugging tightly to the small pup as she joined the boys outside. I let out a groan as I gathered myself onto my feet, brushing off my jeans before stepping out the door. “Why are you so slow?” Seungmin questioned me when I finally managed to stand next to him and Felix. 

“She had to take Jisung’s knot all week,” Amelia responded, overhearing our conversation as she plopped the smallest pup down in the middle of her brothers. 

Seungmin wrinkled his nose. “I thought you smelled differently.”

“She smells like Jisung,” Amelia said, sighing happily as she watched the three pups play. “And he was clingy this morning.”

“He’s always like that,” I rolled my eyes, quietly surveying the remainder of our packmates attending to their various responsibilities. “Aren’t you two supposed to be on patrol?”

“Chan sent NCT members on the morning patrol,” Felix said. “I think I’m going out tonight.”

“I got the day off,” Seungmin bragged, wincing when one of the pups rolled into his leg. 

Amelia grinned. “You’ll need it after this.”

“What?” Seungmin brushed it off, glaring down at the pup who had rejoined his siblings. “I can handle pups.”

“Mina has kept them inside,” Felix remarked. “I don’t blame her, but they’ve probably grown restless.”

“I haven’t noticed,” Amelia snarked, brightening immediately when she spotted Hyunjin walking our way. “Jinnie!”

Hyunjin cautiously approached, dutifully avoiding the energetic pups racing between his long legs. “What are you four doing?”

Amelia whined as she wrapped her arms around Hyunjin. “Jinnie,” Amelia said. “I don’t want pups anymore.”

Hyunjin chuckled, glancing over at the hyperactive trio. “What made you change your mind?”

“They’re little demons,” she growled, leaning in to scent her mate. 

“You liked them when they were younger,” he said, kneeling down to wrangle Leo into his arms. “You were begging Woojin to take you off the pill.”

Amelia blushed. “They were cuter then.”

“And they aren’t anymore?” Hyunjin asked, lifting Leo into the air, the pup giggling at Hyunjin’s playful display of strength. 

“I’ve had the same change of heart,” I nodded, shivering as I imagined being responsible for three pups with no reprieve. 

“Good luck with that,” Seungmin snickered. “Changbin’s been talking about having pups. You might break his heart if you tell him no.”

“Well,” I grumbled. “He doesn’t understand what he’s getting us into.”

“Little miracles,” Felix cooed, lowering himself to his knees as he invited the other two 

pups into an impromptu wrestling match, rolling around on the ground as the pups shrieked with delight at having such a willing punching bag.

“You should be careful,” a new voice interrupted and I cautiously bowed my head respectfully as Chan joined our group. He offered me nothing more than a cursory glance as he glanced between Felix and Hyunjin. “Why aren’t you resting for tonight?”

“Oh, come on Channie,” Felix giggled, touching his nose delicately to each pup. “We’re just having fun.”

“They should be inside,” Chan continued sternly, ignoring Felix’s frown. “It’s irresponsible to take them outside.” 

“I’m sorry Chan,” Amelia immediately tried to rectify. “We were watching them.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Chan insisted sharply and I bristled at the tone he directed at my best friend. “It’s dangerous with the rogues around.”

“Chan,” I snarled his name. “That’s enough.”

The others immediately fell silent as Chan turned his attention to me, eyes narrowed in disbelief. “Take them back inside,” he directed as if intentionally disregarding me.

Hyunjin held onto Leo tighter as he and Amelia retreated into Mina’s cabin. Felix and Seungmin grabbed the other two pups, hesitantly glancing between Chan and me. I ignored their obvious concern, nodding towards the cabin to redirect the pair. However, before I could follow them, I felt Chan reach out to grab my wrist, holding me in place. “Let’s talk,” he ordered briskly, and I reluctantly allowed him to guide me away from the others. 

I supposed I was done babysitting for the day.

Chan brought us to the edge of the woods, releasing my wrist as he slowly backed away. “Well?” I prodded, even knowing that such a short retort would likely ignite his temper.

But Chan calmly held his ground. “You know better than to question my authority as alpha.”

“You weren’t being an alpha,” I said. “You were being a bully. Amelia didn’t deserve that treatment.”

“I’m trying to keep this pack safe,” Chan defended himself. “There’s a reason why I’ve been so busy lately.”

“As I could possibly forget,” I returned. “All you worry about are the rogues.”

Chan scoffed. “Are you suggesting I should forget about them?”

“I’m suggesting that you shouldn’t forget your duty as alpha means more than protecting our borders,” I said. “You also have a responsibility for the well-being of our pack, but you’ve decided to neglect them. I haven’t seen you once visit the wolves in the infirmary and you used to visit our sick every day! And you force our pack members on patrols three times a day which leaves everyone feeling tired and drained. You’ve caused a rift between you, Jisung, and Changbin, and you don’t even bother to do anything about it.” I took a deep breath, collecting my thoughts. “And I’m pretty sure that’s the first time you’ve ever visited Mina’s pups! Don’t you think it reflects badly on our pack when its alpha doesn’t care about our future? Plus, you’ve been ignoring your own mate. I only see you in passing and most of the time we argue like we’re doing right now!”

Chan was silent after I finished my unexpected tirade. The alpha’s expression was difficult to read, but his posture was resolutely tense. Finally, Chan addressed my grievances: “Everything I’m doing is for our pack, and I’m hurt that you would think otherwise.”

“Channie-”

“Myah,” Chan continued sternly. “I don’t have time to talk about this right now, but I expect to see you in my cabin tonight because there’s a lot we need to discuss.”

-------------------------------------------------------------

After

Woojin was a great healer, but I was beginning to lose my confidence in his abilities the longer I paced outside the infirmary, worried for my mate who suffered inside. “Myah,” Jisung tried, watching my movements. “You know Chan wouldn’t be happy if he knew you were this upset over him.”

“He’s hurt,” I whined pathetically because what Jisung didn’t understand was the amount of guilt I possessed over my earlier confrontation with the alpha in question. What if that was the last thing I was ever able to say to Chan? How could I live with myself knowing I decided to berate him for being a terrible alpha right before he was set to go out on a dangerous patrol?

“You need to relax, angel,” Changbin said, patting the empty space on the bench between himself and Jisung. 

I didn’t deserve it, but I also couldn’t stand the idea of disappointing another mate. Changbin and Jisung were too good to me, releasing sweet alpha pheromones that worked at the tension in my body despite my overwhelming guilt. I hadn’t even realized my tears until Jisung’s thumb gently smoothed beneath my eyes. “Why are you so upset, princess?” he asked and that only made me want to cry even more.

However, instead of answering, I buried myself into Jisung’s neck, scenting him heavily as I tried to forget about everything that was happening. “This isn’t like you,” Changbin said, hand resting comfortably on top of my thigh. “Chan will be okay.”

“What if he’s not?” I cried, sniffling against Jisung’s shoulder. I felt bad that I was ruining his shirt.

“Is that what you’re worried about?” Changbin questioned. “Angel, Woojin said that the wound wasn’t that deep. He’s probably just being extra careful so Chan can heal faster.”

“He deserves better than me,” I said, the remark slipping free like the steady flow of tears swelling the round arches of my cheeks. 

“Princess,” Jisung inserted, grabbing my chin to force my attention. “Why do you think that? What happened?”

I stared into Jisung’s kind brown eyes, wanting desperately to purge all my nasty insecurities. Thankfully, the welcome appearance of Woojin paused that unpleasant conversation. “Chan is fine,” Woojin said, wiping the sweat from his brow. “You can see him if you want. He’s a little groggy from the pain medicine.”

“He’s okay?” I asked, shoulders deflating as a resounding sensation of relief banished all the tension from my heart. 

I didn’t even register what I was doing until I was crushing Woojin against my body, thanking him over and over again as the bigger alpha let out a nervous chuckle, gently prying me away. “It’s my job?”

“Come on, angel,” Changbin chuckled, ushering me into Chan’s room.  

I swallowed hard as I wavered in the doorway, my other two mates joining Chan on either side of his bed. “How are you feeling, Chan?” Jisung asked, clicking his tongue as he surveyed Chan’s disheveled appearance. 

“You look like shit,” Changbin said, grimacing as he took in the unexpected appearance of Chan’s messy curls. 

“M’ tired,” Chan replied, eyes rolling over Jisung before attempting a similar appraisal of Changbin. “Where am I?”

“You’re in the infirmary,” Jisung said. “Your patrol was attacked at the border.”

“That doesn’t seem right,” Chan replied. “When did this happen?”

Changbin snorted. “What kind of medicine did Woojin give you?”

Chan ignored Changbin, sniffing the air with interest. “Myah?”

I was startled at the mention of my name, reluctantly dragging my feet to the end of Chan’s bed to gaze down at the alpha nervously. However, surprisingly, Chan didn’t immediately demand an apology for our earlier argument, instead, he let out an uncharacteristic whine as he held out his hands. “Come closer.”

I edged past Changbin, joining Chan at the side of his bed. “Are you okay, Channie?”

The alpha disregarded my question, grabbing onto my arm as he attempted to weakly pull me towards him. “Not close enough.”

I was practically bent over the rails of the bed, allowing Chan to sniff eagerly at my scent gland. I let out a growl as Changbin smacked my ass, glaring at the other alpha who was obviously quite pleased with himself. Jisung chuckled at our exchange. “Are you done asserting your alpha dominance?”

Changbin frowned. “As if you’re any better.”

The two were quietly bickering as Chan’s lips brushed across my ear. “I’m sorry,” he whispered whilst sounding perfectly sensible, and I knew exactly what he was apologizing for. 

“Me too,” I replied, leaving a sweet kiss at the edge of his lips.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 9

I was dreaming, but it felt more like a memory. 

Because I was home again. Not the home I shared with my mates and our pack, but the home I associated with my parents and the sweet smell of honeysuckle flowers in the backyard. The kind of home that always made me think exclusively of my most innocent occasions with Chan, misbehaving as we daringly climbed the highest trees and swam in the river despite its overpowering current. A home I knew before I would mate three alpha wolves who would have a profound effect on the person I would become.

But the memory was wrong. For example, Jisung and Changbin were there too and my mates were never around my home when we were younger. We were also older and that was wrong too because I never returned home after I left for the first and last time. However, the differences were strange and I felt like there was something important I was forgetting. Ignoring the feeling of tension while the four of us acted like pups again as we mischievously chose to play in our wolf forms. We nipped at each other’s legs, running through the fields despite the eerie sight of a thick fog curling through the woods. 

I stopped in the middle of our game. The fog was wrapping itself around my legs, climbing the full expanse of my height. I shifted back because my wolf was somehow distant from me, warning me to do something that I didn’t understand. I felt trapped, unable to move or even call out to my mates who had returned to see why I was no longer participating in the game. But their voices sounded distant, muddled and obscured by something invisible. I was afraid because everything was rapidly changing and there was nothing to stop the inevitable.

And then I was alone because the fog and my mates were gone. But somehow this was worse and I fell to my knees because I didn’t know what else to do. What if they abandoned me? What if I was forced to live alone for the rest of my life? I wanted to cry but I couldn’t. I wanted to do something but I felt a tight pull demanding my attention.

A little pup was watching me. His blue eyes, which reminded me so much of Chan, were distant. I reached out for the little pup, beckoning it closer. We were both in danger, I could feel it in the bone-chilling breeze that ruffled my hair. But the little pup did not move from its spot and I could do nothing from mine. “You can do it,” I encouraged the pup, but my whispery tone was lost in the cataclysmic space separating us.

I saw red eyes next, glowing bright and sinister. An obvious evil that wanted to hurt me and the little pup I was failing to protect. The wolf they belonged to was targeting the little pup who refused to move from its spot. I whimpered pathetically, desperately trying to reach the stubborn pup who seemed insistent on staying where it was. “You can’t save it,” the wolf snarled at me. “You can’t save any of them.”

Suddenly, there were dozens of wolves surrounding us, moving in closer with predatory steps, haunches raised as they prepared to attack. “Please,” I begged the pup, but it was now watching the wolf who had spoken before.

“They tried to protect it,” the wolf growled, stepping aside as three of my aggressors proceeded forward. At first, it was difficult to discern their shapes because of the thick shadows, but as they came closer, the light revealed the sickening truth. I had never seen Jisung so lifeless before, eyes closed and throat scarlet red as the wolf dropped his limp body next to the little pup who only seemed puzzled by the sight. 

“Daddy?” the little pup questioned, nuzzling its tiny nose against Jisung.

Changbin was left next to Jisung and he appeared to be in far worse condition, dark hair matted with mud and clothes soiled with blood. I had never seen my mate look so weak before. “Why won’t he wake up?” the little pup asked me, pressing a tiny paw against Changbin’s shoulder. But my mate did not respond.

And I was beyond reason because I knew they were both gone.

Yet, at the same time, nothing could possibly compare to the utter anguish I experienced when Chan finally came into view. My oldest friend, my first love, who never gave up and defied all odds and expectations, was being pulled across the ground by the collar of his tattered shirt. 

I had never seen my mate look so defeated before. “Channie,” my voice cracked, and I was lost to my grief because I was nothing without the three of them.

“Is he tired?” the little pup asked, burying itself against Chan’s side despite the horrifying amount of blood seeping through the fabric. “He smells different.”

“Binnie?” I desperately tried. “Sungie?”

“Mommy,” the pup finally summoned me, eyes reflecting wisdom that defied its years. “Aren’t they coming back?”

I couldn’t breathe, holding back something between a sob and a shout. But the torrential river of tears had already escaped without my consent, staining my cheeks and the well-worn neckline of my favorite sweater. “What have you done?”

I directed the question at the menacing wolf who clearly held responsibility for all the pain and grief I was expressing. The wolf snarled, teeth coated with their blood. “There’s nothing you can do to stop it! They’re coming for you, Myah.”

-------------------------------------------------------------

I jerked awake, eyes wide open as heavy breaths filled my screaming lungs. I stifled a cry, slapping my hand over my mouth as the familiar sight of my bedroom came into focus. A single tear spilled free when I realized that Changbin was lying next to me. I immediately placed a hand over his chest, relieved when I could feel the way it rose and fell with the life coursing through his veins. My mate was still asleep and he looked incredibly peaceful, skin glowing with color and an obvious absence of red from any trace of his body. “Binnie,” I delicately whispered, ready to burrow myself against his warmth and demand his attention. But Changbin deserved to sleep, despite the countless times he had assured me that he would never be upset if I woke him after a nightmare. Instead, I decided to take a walk, even if I knew it was dangerous without one of my mates to escort me along the perimeter of our territory. 

I needed fresh air.

Thus, despite the sweat caking my hair to the back of my neck, chilling me when I stepped into the cold night, I made my decision. I shivered, tightening my grip on the lapels of my sweater. I started in the direction of the woods, where the rogues had never been sighted, deciding that I could walk to the edge and back before Changbin had a chance to realize I was gone. It was a good plan because I was still suffering from the pain of my recent nightmare, body convulsing slightly as I wiped away the salty drops from my cheeks.

I hummed to myself, emptying my mind of everything, but especially the nightmare, as I noisily crunched the permafrost decorating the grass beneath my feet. It was really nice, breathing in the fresh air as I worked my muscles loose. When I first came to the pack, I always took walks by myself before going to sleep. They were a surefire guarantee to relieve my body’s tension. Perhaps I should reconsider incorporating them back into my routine.

When the woods finally came into focus, I felt a tremor of fear as images from my nightmare flooded my mind without my conscious dictation. But everything felt so incredibly real and I could only stand the sight of the trees for a few seconds before I was already turning back around. I missed Changbin’s warmth and his scent would be just as reassuring as the fresh air had been.

A low growl sounded from behind me.

I froze to the spot, whipping around so fast that my hair flew into my line of vision. I could make out their forms in the trees, glowing eyes seeking out my vulnerable person. Instinctively, I shifted into my wolf form, snarling at the shadows threatening the peace of our camp. 

But I was greatly outnumbered. 

There were at least a dozen wolves shaking themselves of the precipitation from the vegetation they had escaped from. They surrounded me completely, leaving no room for a possible escape. I was terrified, but I put on a brave front, hoping to intimidate them into abandoning what they probably suspected to be easy prey.

The biggest wolf, who I assumed to be the alpha, approached me first. He tasted the air, eyes widening in interest as his claws dug into the dirt. “Don’t you know there are rogues at your borders?”

“This isn’t your territory,” I reminded him, snapping my teeth at a different wolf who dared a step in our direction.

“For now,” the alpha wolf insisted smugly, appraising me like I was something he wanted. “What’s a she-wolf doing out here on her own?”

“An omega too,” the wolf I previously snapped at deduced, sniffing the air aggressively. 

“She would be perfect for me, Jaemin,” the alpha grumbled, making me feel small in comparison to his proud stature.

“Jeno needs a mate,” Jaemin continued, eyes locked on my quivering wolf as he started circling me. “Know anyone for the job?”

Jeno snickered, coming in closer. My wolf instinctually lowered herself to the ground, whimpering when the bigger alpha loomed over top. So much for my bravery. “Maybe I’ll just take you.”

“I’m already mated,” I tried but Jeno just laughed.

“I’ll ruin their claim on you,” Jeno growled, forcing his nose against my scent gland. “You won’t be able to fight it, isn’t that right, Renjun?”

The summoned wolf emerged from the group, defending his alpha. “You’re just an omega.”

“A she-wolf,” Jaemin added. “You don’t stand a chance against us.”

“I could just take you now,” Jeno continued, rutting against me and my wolf howled in protest. “It would be better if you submit.”

“Maybe we can kill your alphas,” Jaemin suggested. “Then you’ll have nowhere to go.”

“Please don’t hurt them,” I begged the rogue wolves who were likely beyond reason.

“We’ll do whatever we want,” Jaemin sneered. “This is our territory now.”

There was a chorus of agreement from the other gathered wolves.

“And they had the audacity to call our former packmates?” Renjun shook his head, his wolf pawing at the ground. “None of you stand a chance.”

The threatening wolves seemed so self-assured, releasing intimidating snarls and growls as they maintained their lines. Jeno leaned down, sniffing at my lower half. “This one is almost in heat.”

“Take her now,” Jaemin insisted, wolf releasing a whine as he paced back and forth. He was anxious to see his alpha exert his dominance.

“Make the claim,” Renjun encouraged him and I had never been more afraid.

But I still had the wherewithal to consider my circumstances, ignoring the way Jeno started to sniff his way across my fur. I didn’t want to give myself to the horrible alpha wolf, but there was nothing I could do to stop his ego. My only option was to agree to his advances, especially if I could also help my pack.

“If you leave my pack alone,” I interrupted the two wolves. “I’ll come with you without a fight.”

Jaemin paused and Jeno seemed to consider the offer. “Where would we go? This territory belongs to us.”

“There are weaker packs in the surrounding valley,” I insisted, feeling ashamed to dismiss another pack so easily. “They wouldn’t see you coming.”

“Is that so?” Jeno asked. 

“Don’t listen to her,” Jaemin growled. “We already have the advantage. Their pathetic alpha almost lost his head when he tried to stand up to you.”

“Our alpha is stronger than ever,” I lied. “My pack has formed a formidable alliance. They’re prepared to attack and kill your wolves. You could avoid that confrontation and find easier hunting grounds further north.”

Jeno’s tail lashed harshly from behind him. “Will you come with us tonight, then?”

“Tomorrow night,” I tried, utilizing every argument my fear-ridden mind could conjure up to try and dissuade the obvious threat. Because if they attacked our camp, how many of my packmates would be killed? Would someone like Jeno have mercy on Mina’s pups? 

My sacrifice could save them all.

Jeno was quiet for a while, ignoring his packmate’s impatience. Finally, he conceded and I had never felt so relieved. “Alright, omega, if you come with us tomorrow night, then we’ll leave your pack alone.”

It was a worthy exchange, and I would be glad to risk my life.

“I promise,” I agreed. “As long as you keep your word.”

Jeno growled. “I always keep my word.”

-------------------------------------------------------------

I returned to my cabin shaking from head to toe. I had formally made an agreement with a rogue alpha to leave my pack in exchange for his. If my mates knew of this exchange, then they would immediately do everything in their power to change the end result. However, for once in my life, I wanted to do something for them.

I shakily crawled back into bed next to Changbin, willing the tension to leave my body. Surely, my mate would detect my heightened anxiety through our bond? I didn’t want Changbin to worry or ask any unnecessary questions.

“Did you leave, angel?” Changbin’s voice abruptly asked, voice groggy as he wrapped an arm around my waist.

“No,” I lied, gradually feeling his breathing even off as he returned to sleep. It wasn’t the first time I had ever lied to Changbin, but it might possibly be the most profound utterance of my entire existence.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I couldn’t think of a better way to honor my mates for the endless love and affection they always reserved for me. They were always there to help and support me, even if it led to embittered fights between the trio. Thankfully, I could at least rest easy with the knowledge that the four of us had seemingly settled into an easy situation despite the threat of the rogues. It was a good time to leave when everything was so perfect because I could always remember them this way. It was enough to instill the courage I needed to carry out my promise to Jeno. 

The following morning, I made sure to spend as much time with my mates as possible. I gave the morning to Changbin, waking up next to him and wrapping my hand loosely around his cock. Changbin was sweet, sleep still heavy in his eyelids as he fucked me, and I ran my hands across his dark skin, trying to memorize the way it felt.

I spent the afternoon with Jisung, the two of us playing together behind his cabin before we laid out a blanket on the grass. I let Jisung cook for me, even though he was rather horrible at in the kitchen, but I complimented his food. I even let him feed me since he enjoyed it so much. I always found it humiliating, but I knew it made him feel like he was taking care of me and I wanted him to feel like he was a perfect alpha.

It was harder to meet Chan that evening, enjoying the meal he prepared for us. As I sat across from him at the table, I studied his features closely hoping to keep a photographic equivalent locked safely away for me to summon at a whim’s notice. Chan hardly noticed my weird behavior, talking about how little they had seen of the rogues all day. I knew that was my doing, but it was validating to know that they would keep their word.

And since Chan was feeling better after his accident, I desperately wanted him to fuck me. It was easy to convince him, smashing kisses to every available surface of his countenance, releasing pheromones I knew he couldn’t resist. Despite the hurried way he tried to progress our lovemaking, I insisted on a slower pace, wanting to feel Chan’s fingers as they brushed across my skin. I needed his lips and teeth to leave marks against my collarbones, bruising the delicate skin around my scent gland.

I freed him from his shirt, enjoying his kisses while I worked hard to map out his body. I wanted to know every muscle and bone that built his torso, the pale skin that reminded me of the fresh snow in the mountains. I ran my hands across his abdomen, tracing the faint trail of dark hair that disappeared beneath the waistband of his jeans.

There was so much of Chan to love and I wanted him to feel like he was the most important alpha in the world.

I handled his cock with as much care as possible, thumbing across his foreskin, watching the precum glistening at his tip. I decided to taste him, hoping to memorize that as well because I would miss every part of him when I was gone. The impossible swell of his knot, the dips my tongue encountered on their sensual journey along the velvety flesh. “Channie,” I purred happily, feeling him deep in my throat.

I could always remember that.

“Myah,” Chan’s voice was soft and affectionate. He undressed me leisurely, falling into the pace I set, kissing my skin reverently while making me feel like I was the most treasured thing in his life. I recalled an earlier conversation from dinner, remembering the way Chan spoke about the possibility of having pups of our own: “You’ll be glowing,” he praised. “I’ll have more of you to worship.”

“Whatever you want,” I replied even though I hated the fact that I couldn’t fulfill his request.

I choked on a sob as Chan’s cock suddenly penetrated between my legs. He groaned above me, scent heady and powerful as he pressed inside, connecting the two of us in the most intimate way possible. I wanted to stay like that forever, locked together with Chan, his knot holding us in place while he fervently praised me, words forming the most beautiful sentences.

“More,” I demanded of him, which might be selfish, but Chan was never one to deny me anything.

“Whatever you want,” he said in reply, quickening his pace, hips drumming against mine as the sound joined our harmony of moans.

“Please,” I cried, tightening my grip on his curls because they were lovely when I could feel them between my fingers.

“I love you,” Chan whispered, cock hitting perfectly as his tongue traced against my scent gland. 

I was crying, but perhaps Chan thought it was out of pleasure as opposed to the impending sacrifice weighing heavily on my subconscious. “I love you so much,” I hiccuped, moaning as I felt his knot catch, dragging heavily as he continued to thrust his hips.

“You’re mine,” Chan continued, chanting my name. “So beautiful.”

“Channie,” I whined, stuttering when he attempted to pull out one last time. He faced resistance from the knot, but he was strong enough to continue. 

Chan was always the strongest because his heart was pure and loving.

“You’ll make a great mother,” Chan whispered and I lost all inhibitions as he finally stilled his movements. He moaned as he rested his head against my chest, curls soft as he found where we were connected. I kissed the damp skin of his forehead, reaching down to thumb along the exposed flesh of his swollen knot causing him to shiver above me. “Feels so good,” he slurred, mouthing across my scent gland, toned shoulders flexing as he lowered himself to fit against the expanse of my throat. 

“You feel good,” I praised him, running my hands up and down the smooth skin of his back, pausing at the dip in his spine. 

“I’ve missed you,” Chan purred happily, content to nip at my scent gland while I savored the sensation of being completely obscured by his overwhelming warmth. Chan always made me feel safe because he was always willing to do whatever was necessary to ensure my well-being. I was grateful for everything he had given me, but I knew it was time to give something back.

Chan was slowly losing himself to the promise of sleep, and I could feel his hold loosening around my waist. I knew Jeno would be waiting, but I didn’t want Chan to suspect anything. Even if he noticed my absence in the middle of the night, I wanted to be long gone before he could possibly find me and change my mind.

Because my mates had spent their entire lives protecting me, so now it was time I tried protecting them.

I waited until Chan was fully unconscious before I quietly left the room.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 10

When I was still in high school, a group of jealous omega girls started openly targeting me as the primary recipient of their endless bullying. Apparently, the idea of having three alpha mates was incredibly taboo in our pack, especially given how young we were. Sure, there were plenty of instances of omegas mating with one or two alphas in other packs, but three? And it was impossible to forget how rare my situation was when our classmates enjoyed reminding me. 

In actuality, I should have known that they were hurting me out of jealousy as opposed to some sort of personal vendetta against an omega who had already mated three alphas. For example, the leader of this group of petty female nuances happened to be the same girl Changbin abandoned the night he mated me. And two of her friends had previously spent their heats with Jisung before I was even in the picture. But whatever the reason, I was always deeply offended when they would taunt me in the hallways or leave behind some sort of reminder that they despised my circumstances.

Like those horrible notes they left in my locker

I carefully unfolded the pristine white square, smoothing out the creases. “The school’s biggest slut,” I read aloud while trying to ignore the way my wolf bristled at the insinuation.

“At least you’ve acknowledged it,” a reckless female voice mocked from next to me. I glanced up wearily as she joined her friends at the lockers behind mine. 

I looked back down at the note despite the fact that the words had started swimming together in front of me. It was difficult to make out the letters and I felt absolutely horrible as I picked up their whispered insults. It was all too much for me to handle because I had never faced this level of derision before, especially from those who were supposedly my pack members.

“Angel.”

I quickly folded the note and stuffed it inside of a textbook before Changbin could see the harsh words. I turned around, hoping I looked more put together than I felt, unresisting when Changbin pulled me closer by the hips. “You smell good,” he remarked, leaning in closer. 

From over his shoulder, I spotted the young group of girls frowning in our direction. “I thought you were busy.”

“I’m never too busy for you,” he purred cheesily. “You shouldn’t be at school this close to your heat, angel. How can we take care of you here?”

I could hear their giggles in the background. “You never want to help,” I said bitterly, ignoring the way Changbin’s expression fell. 

“Angel,” Changbin continued delicately, “are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” I muttered. “I can’t be late for class.”

“But if you aren’t feeling well...”

“I promise I’m okay,” I dismissed his concerns.

“Let me take you to class.”

“I can walk by myself,” I retorted, reaching back to slam my locker door shut. 

I knew I had hurt Changbin, but I couldn’t stop thinking about those filthy notes or the taunting insults and dirty looks my classmates gave me in the hallways. Those omega girls had no idea how wrong they were in turning everyone against me. They only cared about getting a reaction, and I wasn’t strong enough to deny them.

“Angel,” Changbin tried again, but I was already walking in the opposite direction.

I ate lunch alone because I was tired of dealing with the rest of my classmates, and I knew that nobody wanted to deal with me. It had become a tentative arrangement, an unspoken agreement that they would leave me alone if I sat as far away from civilization as possible. Normally, I would refuse to sit alone, but I didn’t have the desire to continue fighting when I was the only enemy.

I glanced out the window, watching the way the rain fell against the glass. My wolf longed to escape the oppressive atmosphere of our school life, and I had never wanted the shift more. I could practically feel my muscles aching, desiring nothing more than to let my wolf take control and run us back home where I felt safe.

I suddenly raised my head when I detected a familiar scent. It was graciously soothing...

“Hello, princess!” 

Jisung’s voice was charming as he sat next to me. “I switched lunch periods. Changbin said you weren’t feeling well.”

I rolled my eyes. “He’s exaggerating.”

“Well,” Jisung started, tossing down his tray, “I still worry.”

“I don’t want you to worry about me,” I said, sighing as I slowly started the process of dividing my vegetables into the remaining compartments of my lunch tray.

Jisung watched me carefully. “How was class?”

“Boring,” I told him honestly, wincing when my spoon scratched against the metal underside.

“I thought you liked your art class?”

“The teacher put on a film today,” I explained. “I was seconds away from falling asleep.”

“Is that why you look so down?” Jisung asked, shuffling in closer to me. 

I could feel his familiar warmth.

Jisung grabbed my spoon, filling it with the school’s flimsy excuse for nutrition. “Princess,” Jisung continued, holding out a spoonful of vegetables. 

A nearby duo of alphas had started observing our exchanges. The look in their eyes was one of silent judgment. “I’m not hungry,” I insisted, ignoring his offering.

Jisung frowned, lowering the food. “What’s wrong, princess?”

“I have a lot to do,” I said. “I need to talk to my teachers since I’ll be out for my heat.”

“That’s right,” Jisung said, eyes brightening. “When do you want me to come over?”

“I’ll let you know,” I said, suddenly feeling the desire to escape the dining room before the two of us attracted more attention. Yet, while attempting to stand up from the table, I was unprepared for the sudden headrush, stumbling to the side. 

An unfortunate side effect of my impending heat hormones.

But Jisung was there to hold me close, scenting me gently while my vision slowly stabilized. Nevertheless, I still heard the whispers from the surrounding tables. Why was everyone being so infuriating?

“Jisung,” I hissed, stepping out of his embrace. The alphas sitting next to our table snickered as they watched the two of us. 

“Did I hurt you, princess?” Jisung fretted, hands anxiously wandering down my arms. 

“No,” I fidgeted, taking another step back. “I just don’t feel good.”

“Are you cramping?” Jisung questioned and my face heated because he had said it so loudly. It felt like every pair of eyes in the dining room were looking in our direction.

“Don’t say that,” I urged him.

“Is it that bad?” Jisung asked, voice quieter. “Do you want me to take you home, princess?”

“It’s nothing,” I insisted, reaching down for my textbook. 

“Do you want me to come with you?”

“No,” I said quickly, perhaps with more reprimation than I intended. Jisung was so easily breakable and I knew my words would hurt him. Which is why I didn’t stick around to make things worse than they already were.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Since our bond was still relatively fresh, I usually sought after Chan at various points throughout the day. Even if it was for just a brief moment, the two of us would scent one another between classes to appease our demanding wolves. Usually, it was I who often cornered Chan and sought his attention. Today, however, it was Chan who found me, grabbing my hand and pulling me inside an empty classroom. 

Chan studied me for a brief moment, blue eyes searching. Then, he cautiously bared his neck, and I took the time to ensure that we were truly alone before I scented him enough to feel the bond settle back down into place. But that wasn’t enough for Chan.

“Something’s wrong,” Chan said, an observation as opposed to a question. “Changbin and Jisung said you weren’t feeling well.”

“I told them I was fine,” I snapped.

Chan raised one brow in question. “I don’t think you are.”

“It’s just my heat,” I insisted, jerking back when he attempted to fit his palm against my forehead.

Chan frowned. “You’re not acting like yourself.”

“I know,” I said. “I’m not usually close to heat.”

“I don’t think that’s why,” Chan reasoned and I cursed his intuitiveness. The alpha knew me better than most after a lifetime of close friendship.

“Don’t make me tell you,” I begged and Chan startled at the raw vulnerability I allowed in my tone.

“Now I’m worried,” Chan said, reaching out for my hand which I allowed him to take.

“I’ll figure it out,” I offered vaguely. “There’s nothing you can to do help.”

“Not if you don’t ask,” Chan countered, resting his forehead against mine.

“I can’t this time,” I said. “I have to be the one to fix this.”

“You know I don’t like that, Myah,” he said. “If I can’t help you as a mate, then I’m breaking my promise.”

“You can’t know,” I trembled.

“Why?”

“Because you’d be furious and irrational,” I said, startling when Chan abruptly pulled away.

“This sounds bad.”

“It really isn’t the worst thing that could happen,” I said. “You should focus on building the new pack. The four of us graduate soon.”

“Will you be out for your heat tomorrow?” Chan asked. “Your scent is spiking.”

“I’ll come to school one more day.”

“Can it be fixed before your heat?”

“I don’t know,” I sighed. “But I promise I’ll be okay. Please just worry about the new pack.”

“You’re my first priority,” Chan reminded me gently, thumbing across my lips.

“Not this time,” I said, brushing my fingers across his cheek. “Let me handle this problem.”

I held the alpha’s demanding gaze, but it was always difficult to convince Chan to submit.

“Okay,” Chan reluctantly agreed. “But if you keep acting like this, then you have to tell me.”

“I promise,” I said even as the lie weighed heavily over my heart.

-------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning, I arrived at school early feeling absolutely horrible. It was a terrible mistake to come to school that day. I was feverish and sickly, sweat dotting my forehead in an unappealing way, and I knew my heat was right on the precipice. I could barely sleep, bombarded by vivid dreams of my three mates, salivating at the image of their thick knots.

I shook myself from my headspace, hurrying to my locker to exchange textbooks. I was quickly growing more and more assured that I had made a bad decision about leaving my house. Thankfully, I knew that I could likely convince Jisung to take me home after lunch since we shared a class.

Reassured by this development, I opened my locker door, immediately noticing the folded note waiting on top of my math textbook. I let out a sigh as I opened the paper, reading the sentences carefully. And each subsequent line slowly broke my resolve the more I read my classmates’ spiteful comments.

“There you are!”

I ignored him at first, too swept away by the note. My wolf howled in outrage, demanding she take control and show those girls why they should mind their own business. But I couldn’t let her go because I would lose complete independence so close to my heat.

I grimaced at the note’s message, ignoring the way Jisung lingered, confusion evident in his expression. “Princess?”

I took off down the hallway without another word.

-------------------------------------------------------------

If you want to do something about it, meet us during lunch in the gym.

I was shaking, rage overcoming every action as I stormed down the hallway. My fever was out of control and my entire body felt overheated. Yet, I didn’t hesitate at the opportunity to confront those omega girls. I had promised Chan I’d try to take care of the problem and this was my chance.

I easily spotted the five omega girls waiting inside the gym. My vision was narrowed, focusing only on the girls who had made my life so unbearable recently. But I didn’t want to be miserable anymore, I would end things once and for all.

“You came,” one of the girls remarked as if she was genuinely shocked to see me.

I held up the note to remind her. “You invited me.”

“We didn’t think you’d be stupid enough to show up,” the leader teased, starting slowly in my direction. “Where are your little guards?”

“Maybe she let them off their leashes,” the first girl giggled.

“What a slut,” the leader smirked. “Do you just spread your legs so that they can take their turn with you?”

“Or maybe she has a preference,” another added. “I know Changbin likes it rough.”

My chest heaved as I took a deep breath. “How are you gonna keep them satisfied?”

“Eventually, they’ll get tired of sharing,” the first omega said. “You’ll be left alone and nobody will want a slut.”

For some reason, now that I was here, my entire demeanor had shifted. I no longer felt angry, my wolf was unusually quiet, and my heat symptoms had settled. But I had also lost my fire, my drive to control the five girls and now I couldn’t find the right words. Instead, I was silent, allowing them to insult me while I no longer felt the urge to do anything about it.

I allowed the five of them to corner me against the wall, wedged between hard concrete and an angry aggregation of omega females. The leader took a step closer, eyeing the mark on my neck. “Everyone knows Changbin only marked you because he was in a rut.”

Her friends laughed at the comment. 

“What should we do, ladies?” the leader continued. “How do we make the little slut pay?”

“I don’t know,” one of the others contributed. “She must have a high tolerance for pain if she can take three knots.”

More snickering. “Should we test it?”

The first slap was jarring, snapping my neck to the side. I could feel the reminder, stinging the raw skin of my right cheek. “Pathetic,” the leader snarled. “How much more can you take?”

“I think you might want to reconsider,” a dangerous voice growled.

The lead omega let go of me so fast that it was almost imperceptible. Suddenly, there were familiar scents overtaking the nasty smell of those horrible girls. I opened my eyes, watching the omega leader whine submissively as Chan bared his teeth.

A warning.

“Do you think you can do this?” Chan continued. “What gives you the right?”

“Chan,” the leader tried, “we didn’t mean anything by it!”

“You tried to hurt my mate,” Chan snapped. “That means you tried to hurt us too.”

“And you put your hands on her?” Changbin added eyes darkened considerably. 

“You’re the ones who deserve to feel pain,” Jisung inserted, and I was taken aback by the hostility in my mate’s words. I had never heard Jisung sound so confrontational before. His threat was frightening and I could feel its authenticity which prompted me into action.

I carefully reached for Jisung, wrapping my hand around his bicep. His expression shifted, shoulders relaxing. “Just let them go.”

Jisung turned to look at me. “Let them go?”

“Not after what they did,” Changbin insisted, fully prepared to follow through on their words.

Thankfully, Chan seemed more aware of what I wanted. “Get out of here,” he said coldly, watching me even while his dismissive tone was addressed to the five omega girls who hesitated as their leader froze.

But Changbin’s resounding growl sent the girls scampering in the other direction. 

Meanwhile, Chan’s hand settled on my shoulder, urging me to come closer. My head thudded hard against Chan’s powerful chest, tears ruining the fabric of his t-shirt. I was shaking, hands clenched together while I swallowed painfully.

I could feel Changbin and Jisung’s presence, anxiously worried as they felt the full force of my frustration. “You should have told me,” Chan said, holding me close. “You didn’t deserve any of that.”

“Those girls,” Changbin started, voice thick with anger, “they’re the sluts.”

“How long?” Chan inquired, fingers lovely as they sorted through the strands of my hair.

“A while,” I offered vaguely, more concerned with the deliciously familiar scent of my alpha mate as I nosed along his collarbone. I could feel Changbin behind me, hands familiar on my hips. 

“I’m sorry, angel.”

Jisung’s lips brushed across my temple. “You can’t keep these things from us.”

However, above everything else, Chan’s voice was distinct and clear, reassuring and familiar.

“We’ll always keep you safe, Myah.”

-------------------------------------------------------------

Present

I wanted to be brave, but I had never quite felt this helpless before. 

It had only been a day since I had abandoned my pack, but I was already miserable. Sadly, there was nobody around to support me this time. I was the outsider here while the other omega girls scampered around their rogue pack members. In fact, two of them were begging for Jaemin’s attention, submitting easily to their desires as he flirted. It was strange to watch the exchange considering the harsh way Jaemin had talked down to me.

I was brought back to reality by Jeno’s unwanted touch.

He traced the outline of Changbin’s mating mark. “These will have to go,” he said dismissively.

I trembled despite the close proximity of the fire. 

“Fuck her good, Jeno,” Jaemin sneered, holding his two omegas close. 

“She won’t be able to walk when I’m done with her,” Jeno promised, nipping at my ear. 

“Do it soon because they might be able to track her,” Rejun suddenly inserted, gaze cautious as he glanced around our unorthodox camp set-up. 

“They won’t have a claim when I’m done,” Jeno said. “You don’t need those alphas anyway, omega.”

He was wrong, but I couldn’t say anything. After all, I had willingly compromised with the intimidating alpha for the safety of my pack. And while I still believed in my decision, I also couldn’t help but long for the familiarity of home and my three mates.

“Take her now,” Renjun urged, nodding towards one of the tents. “Do it fast before they become a problem.”

I didn’t wince when Jeno roughly grabbed me, forcing me up while he practically drug me into his tent. I landed roughly on the mattress, whimpering despite my attempts to remain strong against the alpha. He was over me in the next second, baring his teeth to intimidate my wolf. I could feel her inside me, bowing her head shamefully as the fight slowly left my body.

“You’ll just take it,” Jeno growled approvingly, leaning down to mouth at my scent gland. “Like a good little bitch.”

I was forced onto my stomach, whining loudly as the alpha jerked off my pants. “And you can take my knot tonight,” he continued, “and I’ll claim you for myself.”

In moments like this, I wish I could simply pretend that everything was okay. It seemed obvious to try and imagine myself in a better situation, that maybe I could pretend it was Jisung or Changbin or Chan with me instead of Jeno. But I guess I didn't have enough experience with that so I was stuck dealing with the consequences.

“You have good sense,” Jeno said, fingers rough and messy. “You’ll be quiet, won’t you? Just let me do what I want.”

I growled out a warning but didn’t fight back when I heard the sound of his belt. His body was too warm over mine, hands wrong when they touched my hips to adjust my position, and my senses were assaulted with his appalling musky scent. My wolf was bristling, pacing anxiously because she knew what was about to happen but had no idea how we could stop it from happening. 

“Jeno,” a tentative voice suddenly interrupted.

I sighed in relief when Jeno pulled back, growling in frustration. “What is it?”

The rogue wolf didn’t even react despite my compromising position with the alpha. “Jeno,” he said, “a patrol spotted wolves not far from the campsite.”

“Is it her pack?” Jeno asked, glaring down at me.

“We think it is.”

Jeno sighed audibly. “Tell Jaemin and Renjun to gather some wolves together to check out the report. The rest of us will stay behind to pack up the camp, we’ll have to leave tonight as a precaution.”

“Yes sir,” the wolf agreed, retreating quietly from the tent.

“You got lucky this time,” Jeno snapped in my ear and I was graciously left alone to deal with the stray tears that had fallen.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 11

One Year Ago

I watched Chan and Changbin from afar as they spoke together in low voices, observing Minho and Hyunjin’s practice session with studious expressions. My two packmates in question were in prime form, circling each other as they attempted different attacks and reversals. Meanwhile, our youngest pack members watched the exchanges with wide, eager eyes.

I grinned as I noticed the way Jeongin gasped after Hyunjin aggressively pinned Minho to the ground. The younger wolves were always more impressionable and I knew Jeongin idolized Hyunjin, begging the older wolf to teach him battle skills. And teaching the other wolves how to fight was Hyujin’s responsibility, although my two oldest mates had started to regularly involve themselves with our pack’s training.

It was important that the pack prepare its younger members when it came to fighting. Patrols were an essential component of pack life, and if you encountered danger along the borderlines, then you needed to know how to protect yourself. And when a pack member finally came of age, once they graduated from school, they could request to join border patrols and hunts. 

It was a careful system that had been firmly established for a very long time. And as dictated by tradition, once a wolf finished primary school, they would report regularly for either border patrols or scheduled hunting sessions. But they needed to learn the important skills first which is where Minho and Hyunjin came into the picture. When our pack was first formed, Chan assigned Minho in charge of hunting training and Hyunjin in charge of combat training.  

However, Chan and Changbin had taken an interest in observing the recent talent pool of young recruits. Perhaps it was because this was the first time a group of recruits had actually graduated from our new pack’s primary school and joined the regular training sessions. In any case, I often accompanied my mates to the practices because I was incredibly curious since I had declined the opportunity to patrol or hunt. Instead, I chose to cook because I was much more skilled when it came to the culinary arts. Plus, I think it gave my mates peace of mind knowing that I wasn’t in any sort of potential danger. 

Nevertheless, I wasn’t needed for kitchen duty until dinner which left me with far too much time to find something to occupy myself. It was another suitable explanation for why I chose to join Chan and Changbin. Plus, I could admire the powerful physiques of my mates who frequently tucked their t-shirts into the back of their pants under the heat of the afternoon sun.

“Minho,” Changbin said, “show me the stance again.”

Minho complied and Changbin slowly circled around the wolf in question, eyes narrowed as he scrutinized. I admired the attention to detail because Changbin was our pack’s best hunter and, in addition to taking on the responsibilities of the pack’s third in command, Changbin was lead hunter which meant he organized all of the hunting patrols. It was only natural that he was critical of the younger ones who were trying to earn their spots on our pack’s hunting team.

Changbin turned to address the gathered crowd of eager learners. “There’s a lot you should know when you’re out in the woods...”

I lost focus on what Changbin was saying, far too busy studying the hard planes of his broad chest. Recently, Changbin was trying harder to gain more muscle, and his efforts were definitely started to show. Usually, most pack hunters were lean and quick, but Changbin was far bigger which allowed him to take down larger prey most wolves might ignore. 

As Changbin finished his lecture, I turned my head to the side only to find myself ensnared with Chan’s teasing gaze. I raised one brow in question. Chan grinned, slyly making his way over to me while Changbin continued to hold the pack’s attention. “You’re staring,” Chan accused me once he was closer.

“Was not!”

“I can smell your arousal,” Chan continued, laughing when I snapped playfully in his direction. “Bin is trying to teach the new hunters. He doesn’t need you distracting him.”

“I’m over here,” I countered, unconsciously leaning in closer to Chan. My mate snickered and wordlessly combed his fingers through my hair.

“You smell like sweat,” I complained, groaning when he suddenly smashed my face against his bare chest. “Channie!”

“You wanted a closer view,” Chan pointed out to which I begrudgingly stopped squirming and simply accepted my fate.

“How are the recruits?” I asked conversationally, wrapping an arm loosely around Chan’s waist.

“They’re learning,” he nodded. “Changbin is too critical.”

“He’s always like that,” I begrudged. “I tried to get him to teach me how to hunt once.”

“And?”

“I wouldn’t speak to him for a week after because he complained the entire time,” I said, taking on a deeper pitch in an attempt to replicate my mate’s voice. “Your stance is wrong, angel. You need to stand like this, are you even paying attention?”

Chan chuckled. “What about when Jisung tried to teach you how to fight?”

I winced at the memory, ghosting my fingers across my hip where Jisung had left a considerable bruise after demonstrating one of his maneuvers. “I guess he’s second in command for a reason.”

“Jisung was just excited,” Chan defended him. “He likes showing off for you.”

“I know,” I groaned before glancing up at Chan. “But he isn’t the only one.”

Chan feigned cluelessness. “Bin?”

“Are you talking about me?”

I squealed when Changbin abruptly wrestled me from Chan’s arms. “Are you done tormenting the younger wolves?”

“I was helping them,” Changbin growled playfully, and I whined in protest as Changbin pulled me closer, nosing his way along my throat. “Are you here to help, angel?”

Chan leaned against the wall, sweat perspiring against his pale skin. “She was complaining about how you like to show off.”

“Chan!” I snapped in his direction, but Changbin immediately pulled my attention back. 

“I only show off for you,” Changbin said, pressing a kiss to his mating mark. “But I know you’ve been looking at me.”

“I’m only here for moral support.”

“Oh really?” Changbin questioned before leaning in closer. “You can have me all to yourself now, angel.”

“Are you going back to your cabin?”

“Of course,” he whispered seductively, one hand moving down to cup the heat between my legs. “You can have me all night.”

“You and Jisung are on patrol tonight,” Chan reminded Changbin, intervening in our scandalous display. 

“Tonight?” Changbin groaned, reluctantly pulling back. 

“I’m not switching, Bin,” Chan grinned as if he could already predict Changbin’s next words before they could even formulate in the alpha’s head. “I covered for you on your rut.”

“I know Jisung did it on purpose,” Changbin grumbled. “He’s jealous because I tracked those foreign scents on the backtrails and he couldn’t.” Changbin pursed his lips, squeezing at my hips. “Some second in command he is.”

Chan rolled his eyes. “You haven’t been on a patrol in months.”

“I’m in charge of hunting.”

“There’s nothing to hunt in the winter,” Chan countered, smiling victoriously as he pulled me away from Changbin’s hold. 

“Figures,” Changbin grunted, moving in to press a quick kiss to my puckered lips. “Have fun tonight.”

I giggled as Changbin reluctantly sauntered away, steps slow and methodical as he left the two of us alone. “Does that mean I’m coming with you?” I teased, nipping at the inviting pout of Chan’s lower lip.

“Of course it does,” Chan agreed. “I need attention too.”

“Well, are you done here?” I asked, nodding to where Minho and Hyunjin were talking with the younger wolves.

“I put them in charge for a reason,” he teased, reaching for my hand. 

-------------------------------------------------------------

I wandered by the open entryway to Chan’s bedroom, listening to my mate mess around somewhere in the kitchen. “Channie,” I called out to him, vaguely scanning the books gathering dust on his nightstand.

“Myah,” Chan returned and I smirked.

“I thought you wanted attention.”

“I do,” he said, voice much closer this time. I glanced back at my mate, watching him as he entered the bedroom. My eyes scanned over Chan greedily. 

“How about a bath?” Chan asked. 

“Please.”

Chan held out a hand which I gladly took, allowing him to pull me in the adjoining bathroom. “Take off your clothes,” he instructed with a wink, already unbuckling his jeans.

I rolled my eyes at his tone but reached down for the hem of my shirt. In the meantime, I could hear Chan messing around with the water, the small room suddenly filling with a delicious scent courtesy of the added soaps he always kept around for me. I appreciated the gesture, watching as he slowly submerged himself beneath the water. “Come on,” he said, holding out a hand to gently lead me into the bathtub. I easily settled between his legs, reclining back against his hard chest. “Comfortable?” he asked to which my omega purred in response. 

“Thank you,” I whispered, closing my eyes as his fingers started working at my shoulders.

“Why are so tense?” he suddenly asked. “Are you upset?”

I debated telling him the truth because I knew it would seem utterly ridiculous from his point of view. “I worry about you and Jisung,” I reluctantly admitted. “I don’t like it when you go out on patrols and I worry about Changbin when he’s hunting.”

“What do you think will happen?” he asked quietly.

“That you’ll get hurt,” I whispered. “And you won’t come home to me.”

“Myah,” Chan gently soothed. “That’s why we go with other wolves. We all have each other’s backs. You have nothing to worry about.”

“I don’t like the idea of you fighting other wolves.”

“I’m stronger than you give me credit for,” Chan teased, and I was blushing because he made it seem ridiculous to worry for his safety.

I leaned back against Chan, shivering when his thumbs teased the bottom of my breasts. “I thought you wanted to relax,” I said even though I had no qualms with his touches.

“You aren’t relaxed?” he questioned, teeth nipping at the shell of my ear.

“I love you,” I suddenly blurted, reclining my head to meet his eyes. “I don’t want to lose you.”

“I love you too,” he whispered back. “And you’ll never lose me.”

-------------------------------------------------------------

Present

I was shivering violently despite the thick coat a sympathetic omega had given me. My fingers clutched at the lapels in a desperate attempt to keep out the cold wind. It would be better if we stopped and tried to pitch the tents, gathering together around a fire to keep warm. However, despite the obvious exhaustion of his pack members, Jeno insisted we keep going to the point where the night had finally been traded in for the promise of dawn. 

And the pack reluctantly marched on.

Some of the stronger wolves, like Jaemin and Renjun, loyally followed their alpha’s command. But I could start to sense some resistance from the rest of his pack, especially those with mates who were obviously worried about one another’s well-being. Yet, Jeno was insistent, reminding the others just how close “the enemy” was to our location. “They can’t find us,” Jeno said, nodding his head assuredly.

I swallowed hard as I fought to maintain his pace. I could feel my strength seeping from my body, fighting the exhaustion of fleeing through the snowy valley and the cold threatening to attack my vulnerable form. I tried to think about my cabin back home, the familiar warmth of the fireplace that maintained a beautiful glow as I snuggled into my bed. Unfortunately, the biting frost nipping my nose and fingertips proved to be far stronger than my memory.

“Jeno,” one of the younger alphas whined. “We can’t keep going.”

Jeno turned around with a snarl. “Do you want to get caught?”

“Let’s stop for the morning,” the smaller wolf suggested. “Just for a little while.”

Jeno obviously did not like the idea, frowning as he surveyed the rest of his pack mates. “Is that what you want?”

I shivered, withholding the urge to confront the alpha. Meanwhile, the rest of his pack were oppressively silent, even if the way their eyes darted around betrayed the fact that these wolves were indeed tired of fighting the cold. 

Jaemin snorted at the display. “Are you weak?”

Jeno shook his head, appearing conflicted. “Fine, but just for an hour.”

A collective gasp of relief was audible. 

“We’ll patrol the woods,” Jaemin informed Jeno, nodding over to where Renjun impatiently walked back and forth.

“Good,” Jeno said, now glaring down at me. “This is way more trouble than we bargained for.”

“Myah,” Chan’s sultry voice sounded absolutely lovely in the mornings. 

Still, I let out a groan as I pulled the blankets closer. “No.”

“Are you tired?”

“I just wanna sleep,” I slurred, reaching out for Chan’s pillow which smelled positively irresistible as I scented the fabric.

“Jisung’s waiting for you outside,” Chan said. 

“Later,” I insisted, ignoring the way Chan’s fingers trailed up the exposed skin of my thigh. 

“What if it’s important?”

“Nothing is more important than sleep,” I explained.

I could hear Chan’s low laughter. “Myah,” he tried again, “I think you’re gonna hurt Jisung’s feelings...”

“Get up!” Jenos harsh voice pulled me from the much-needed slumber I had fallen into. 

I blinked my eyes rapidly, disoriented for a moment as I tried to figure out what was going on.

“Come on,” Jeno growled, holding tightly to my wrist.

I whimpered at his harsh grip as I struggled to recover from the sudden demand to move. “Where are we going?” I asked blearily, stumbling along behind him.

Jeno ignored me, approaching a nearby wolf with purpose. “Well?” he demanded, dark eyes wild.

“We’re surrounded,” the wolf explained, forcibly meeting Jeno’s fiery gaze.

“Then we fight,” Jeno decided. “Organize the lines.”

Organize the lines? But that must mean...

I unconsciously gripped tighter to Jeno’s hand. Because my pack had found the rogues. They were coming for me.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 12

“I want you to be able to fight, princess,” Jisung appealed, ignoring the glare I tossed in his direction.

Changbin let out a snort. “She doesn’t care for it.”

“I did until he tossed me on my ass,” I grumbled, leaning in closer to Chan who was patiently resting behind me on the bed.

Jisung pouted. “I might have gotten carried away.”

“Really?” Changbin faintly growled in Jisung’s direction, walking over to my bedside. “You left a bruise.”

“I didn’t mean it,” Jisung insisted. 

“You came from a good place,” Chan suddenly interrupted, soothingly running a hand up and down my thigh. “I thought it was a good idea.”

“Then you’re both at fault,” Changbin declared, tugging on my jacket sleeve. “You should be sitting with me, angel.”

I giggled. “You just want attention.”

“I’m on your side,” Changbin continued, holding out an arm in an obvious attempt to coax me forward.

Chan chuckled and nudged me gently from behind. “Go on, he’s obviously jealous.”

Changbin snarled in Chan’s direction. I rolled my eyes as I crawled in his direction, forcing his attention away. “You have me now.”

Changbin greedily wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me flat against his chest. Meanwhile, Jisung sighed in a rather exaggerated fashion. “You’ll never let me live this down.”

“You’re right,” Changbin mused, running his nose through my hair. 

“It’s alright, Jisung,” I teased him, “I’m sure you didn’t mean to shove me down.”

“Princess,” Jisung whined, tentatively sitting next to me on the edge of the bed. “I just wanted to help.”

“I know,” I grinned, leaning over to brush my thumb across his bottom lip. “But you’ll always be around to protect me.”

-------------------------------------------------------------

Present

It was nearly impossible to remain motionless next to Jeno while I could clearly see my packmates as they emerged from the woods. They were an imposing sight, especially with the additions of NCT filling their lines as necessary allies. And standing at the front to lead the assault, daunting as they stood together as wolves, were my three alpha mates. 

Vicious and determined.

Chan was the first to break formation, taking a few steps closer to Jeno, eyes clear and focused. “You have wronged my pack for the last time.”

Jeno was quiet for a moment, hold on my wrist unrelenting. “Your pack stands no chance against ours.”

“But they aren’t alone,” Taeyong added, stepping out to accommodate Chan. “You’ve done enough harm to NCT, are you so willing to break up another pack? Was leaving us not enough?”

“We left because your leadership was lacking,” Jeno replied.

“You left because you refused to conduct yourselves honorably,” Taeyong retorted.

“You have no place to talk about honor,” Jeno snarled. “You ally yourself with our enemies, hand out our packmates to use as soldiers in other wars. That is not honorable.”

“But then you somehow think that it’s right to try and steal another pack’s territory?” Taeyong questioned, briefly exchanging glances with Chan.

“I have every right,” Jeno snapped, abruptly yanking me forward. “I took what they couldn’t defend.”

I shivered as Changbin let out an intimidating growl, barely restrained as his wolf kept his gaze firmly transfixed on me

“Jeno, that’s enough,” Taeyong growled. “You had no place to attempt an illegitimate invasion and you have no right to another alpha’s mate.”

“We’re not under your control anymore,” Jeno spat. “We’ll do as necessary to survive on our own.” 

“Then survive on your own,” Taeyong agreed. “Apply for new territory according to tradition.” Taeyong considered me next and I was deeply impressed by the alpha’s obvious wisdom. “Return Myah to her pack.”

“That will never happen,” Jeno declared.

“Are you prepared to shed blood over this?”

“You won’t see us back down,” Jeno growled, exchanging a knowing glance with Jaemin before the smaller alpha let out a menacing howl.

Jeno grabbed my arm and pulled me away as the rest of his rogues charged in the direction of my packmates. 

-------------------------------------------------------------

I struggled to match Jeno’s pace, vision blurry from the force of the wind blowing back against me. The alpha seemed determined, but I had no idea where he was planning to take me. In any case, I knew he was a terrible head alpha for abandoning his pack on the battlefield. If his point was to prove his pack was better off away from NCT, then he continued to make poor decisions to affirm his position.

“This is your fault,” he snarled, suddenly turning around to confront me. We were far away from the battle, even if I could still hear the familiar sounds of war behind us. 

“I kept my promise,” I replied simply.

“We should’ve invaded,” Jeno continued. “I would have your pack’s territory.”

“Then the fault is with your leadership,” I growled in return.

In the next second, I was fumbling to the ground courtesy of a well-timed slap from Jeno. I blinked up at the alpha rapidly, feeling the cold sting against my reddened skin. “You have no place to speak against an alpha.”

“Touch her again and you’ll never speak again.”

My wolf howled with joy, sensing Chan so closeby. I glanced over my shoulder, body shuddering with relief when I spotted my mate. “You think you can defeat me?”

“I’m certain I can try.”

“Pathetic!”

Jeno’s wolf paced back and forth, keeping me mostly obscured from Chan’s view. “You had no right to come here,” Chan growled, viciously pawing at the cold snow.

“We have every right,” Jeno countered. “My pack can challenge for territory. There’s nothing you can do to stop it.”

“We can spill the blood of your ranks,” Chan said. 

“You can certainly try!”

“And you’ve also taken something precious from me.”

I shivered at Chan’s tone while Jeno huffed in annoyance. “The omega is mine now and I will be the one to make a new claim.”

“You’re making a mistake,” Chan warned the other alpha. “I’ll rip out your throat before I let you touch my mate.”

“I’ve already touched her,” Jeno taunted, a deadly mistake. I shuffled back through the snow as Chan abruptly charged at Jeno. The wolves were vicious, snarls echoing throughout the clearing as teeth tore through flesh. My eyes were wide, attentive, taking in the scene in front of me with a mixture of trepidation and anxiety.

Chan was far bigger than Jeno, but the smaller alpha was faster, managing well-placed bites and scratches along my mate’s flank. I winced every time Chan was hit, feeling the pain for myself as Chan allowed ear-splitting howls and barks each time Jeno was successful in an attack. And I longed to do something to help, but I knew my wolf was no match, even as an ally, in this dangerous skirmish. Instead, I kept myself away from the proximity of their fight, rooting for Chan whenever he managed to turn the tables, although it seemed Jeno always had a counter in mind despite Chan’s best efforts.

It made me think of our battle training when Chan had been fighting Hyunjin as a demonstration for the younger wolves. It was a similar scene because Hyunjin was significantly smaller than Chan. My mate was trying to help the wolves who would find themselves in Hyunjin’s position, greatly outmatched against an opponent. Chan was incredibly battle-smart and instructed Hyunjin through a series of complicated maneuvers that ultimately resulted in Chan laying flat on his back with Hyunjin on top. Of course, back then Chan had been proud of Hyunjin, telling him that he was a great fighter. Size did not always matter.

I swallowed hard when I recognized a similar attack from Jeno, seeking access to Chan’s vulnerable throat where one bite could end my mate’s life. Suddenly, this wasn’t just another day of battle training where nobody’s life was at risk. Chan could easily die at any moment and that sobering thought brought me back to reality, tears slipping free as I whined loudly from the bushes.

Jeno’s eyes shot in my direction and I froze.

Was he going to attack me instead?

But I wasn’t expecting to provide a distraction and Jeno was unprepared for Chan’s counter, swiping the smaller alpha’s legs from under him. Jeno collapsed against the snow-covered ground with a grunt. And Chan was there to take advantage of his unexpected position, rolling Jeno onto his back.

I blinked my eyes rapidly before the situation had completely processed. Was it actually over? After Chan had Jeno pinned to the ground, teeth deadly against the pale expanse of Jeno’s exposed throat. Is this all it took?

“You’re lucky to have my mercy,” Chan snarled. “We’ll let Taeyong deal with you.”

I watched as Jeno visibly deflated, flank panting hard as he reluctantly submitted to the alpha who had clearly wrenched an obvious advantage. In the meantime, I had started taking small steps in the direction of my seething mate, seeking his comfort. I let out a low whine to attract his attention and his eyes had already softened by the time they caught mine.

“Come here,” Chan instructed, shifting back to the same blonde-headed man I had fallen in love with all those years ago.

“Channie,” my voice cracked as I fell into his arms, easily shifting back and eagerly scenting him as my body melted against his.

“Myah,” Chan exhaled, fingers digging harshly into my waist. 

He scented me feverishly in return, nose wet from the unbearable cold. “This will never happen to you again,” Chan promised. “Nobody will take you from me.”

I shivered, but this time it was because my mate was sorely mistaken. I had been the one to agree to leave with Jeno. And I could only hope my mate was far too relieved to have me once again to offer the sharp reprimand that I probably deserved.

-------------------------------------------------------------

“Princess,” Jisung’s voice was reassuring, and I desperately inhaled his familiar scent. 

I could feel Changbin anxiously pacing nearby, trying his best to patiently wait his turn with me. The idea brought out a smile and it felt nice given all that had happened. “Relax,” I could hear Chan trying to soothe the younger.

Meanwhile, all around us, the battle had finally progressed to an end. Medical teams were spreading across the field as they tended to the wounded and the ones who had been spared injury were lending a helping hand. As for Jeno’s pack, most of the wolves had reluctantly submitted to Taeyong’s command. The cynical alpha himself, still reeling from his humiliating defeat, was surrounded by three powerful NCT wolves who were waiting for Taeyong’s final order. Whispers had circulated that Taeyong would banish Jeno from the surrounding territory, taking away his pack, his source of strength, and forcing him to live out the remainder of his life in exile.

A cruel fate for any wolf.

“Is it my turn yet?” Changbin grumbled from behind me.

I rolled my eyes playfully as I pulled away from Jisung to allow Changbin his turn to reaffirm our mating bond. As expected, Changbin was greedy, sniffing almost drunkenly at my scent gland. His strong arms held me close, providing a nice shelter from the insistent winds.

“Well?” Jisung eventually asked, looking at Chan. “Have they decided?”

“Taeyong will exile him,” Chan nodded. “It’s what he deserves.”

I shivered at the cold tone.

“He deserves worse,” Changbin growled and I could feel the vibrations from his chest.

“He’s not our responsibility to punish,” Chan said. “I should talk to Taeyong and then we can go home.”

I whined a little at the prospect of returning to camp because it had never crossed my mind while I was gone that I would be able to ever see my pack again. But perhaps I should’ve known better because my mates had never given up on me before. They were too strong, especially when they worked together and I was almost convinced they could do anything they wanted with that combined power. No wolf could stand in their way.

“Angel,” Changbin whispered in my ear. “Are you okay?”

I nodded against him. “I’m okay.”

I could feel Jisung’s presence as he lingered nearby. “We’re sorry this happened to you, princess.”

“He should be lucky we didn’t have a say in his punishment,” Changbin snarled, hold tightening to accommodate the sudden tension in his body.

“Don’t hurt her,” Jisung softly reprimanded the alpha. Changbin’s arms fell from around me as he took hold of my chin. 

“He didn’t hurt you, right angel?”

I shook my head, deciding not to rile up Changbin anymore with complaints against Jeno’s harsh touches or the way he nearly got what he wanted last night in his tent. “He didn’t.”

“When Chan comes back,” Changbin continued, “we’ll go home, alright? You’re safe now, angel.”

Jisung’s fingers soothingly massaged into the back of my neck. “Everything can go back to normal.”

-------------------------------------------------------------

I never imagined the sight of my camp could be so thrilling. I had every cabin memorized, the layout of the land perfectly mapped in my memory. Yet, as soon as my pack’s familiar scent filled my nose, my inner wolf nearly howled in delight. 

Our pack members who had accompanied us to the battle immediately took off in various directions to their cabins. For once, Chan had relieved them of all responsibilities, ordering everyone to rest for the remainder of the day. As for myself, my three mates had redirected us to Chan’s cabin, filing in one by one as they closely followed me to the couch. I sat down with a sigh, feeling the tension drain from my body. Chan joined me next, and I let out a squeak as he lifted me by my waist to readjust my position in his lap. I leaned in to scent him again, never tiring of the way it always soothed my omega. 

I curled closer to Chan, feeling utterly exhausted. Changbin and Jisung flanked Chan on either side of the couch, leaning in slightly to allow their scents to intermingle together. It provided a calming effect on my body, and I found myself relaxing considerably. It was rare for my mates to share a room like this in such an intimate capacity. Their wolves were usually far too competitive to allow our scents to so freely combine. However, I think the events of this evening left everyone, including our wolves, desiring nothing more than closeness. 

I purred when Changbin’s hand curled around my thigh. “How did they take you, angel?”

I trembled at his question. “I left on my own willpower,” I admitted. “Jeno promised he would leave the pack alone if I came with him.”

Silence answered my confession. 

It was an expected reaction, and I had already come to terms with the lecture I would probably receive from my mates for acting so recklessly. However, I also had my own defense prepared for their sharp words. After all, I had left with Jeno because I was trying to save the pack. It wasn’t like I had fallen victim to some sort of cunning scheme or freely decided that I wanted a taste of life beyond the borders of our territory. 

I would have nightmares about the ordeal for years.

“You tried to do the right thing,” Chan finally reasoned delicately, touching his forehead against mine. “Everything worked out in the end.”

The dismissal was surprising, but I wasn’t one to question my mates when they had seemingly allowed me a free pass. Instead, I leaned in closer to Chan to release a soothing pheromone as my own way of extending gratitude. The last thing I wanted to do was fight with my mates over my decision. And given that they were feeling gracious, I decided to allow the events of that evening to fade away into the background as they would with lots of time and healing.

Normalcy was within easy grasp.

“Do you still want pups?”

Jisung’s question made me smile as I turned around in Chan’s lap to face my youngest mate. “Is that what you’re really curious about?”

Jisung blushed but nodded his head. “We mentioned something to Chan.”

I reclined back against Chan’s shoulder. “And what does Chan think?”

“Chan,” my mischievous mate intoned, “would like nothing more than to see our family complete.”

My heart warmed at his words.

“On your next heat,” Changbin grinned, obviously excited by the prospect. 

“That’s soon,” I remarked. “Will it be okay?”

“Now that you’re back, everything is okay,” Chan decided, kissing the top of my head. “The pack will resume as it always has and you’ll still have to deal with three overprotective alpha mates.”

I giggled at his observation because there was a tangible air of excitement surrounding the four of us. A promising future, bright and certain, and we were ready to fully embrace the next chapter in our lives. And as I felt my eyelids grow heavy, listening to the gentle breathing of my alpha mates, I knew we would be ready to face anything as long as we were together.

------------------------------------------------------------

Epilogue

The early morning sun filtered through the Venetian blinds to form a pattern of equivalent stripes against my bedsheets. Normally, I could ignore the way the sunlight infiltrated my line of vision, but my daughter provided a far more compelling alarm system. Her cries always began with faint whines which I might disorientingly miss, but they never lasted long, evolving into noisy cries that demanded attention. Groggily, I sat up against the headboard of my bed, vacantly looking out my open door where I could spot my daughter’s bedroom from across the hallway. With a defeated sigh, having already given up on the possibility of sleeping past noon, I slowly made my way to address my daughter’s grievances.

However, perhaps I had dismissed my sleeping concerns prematurely. “Changbin?” I immediately questioned, surprised to see that my mate had beaten me to my daughter’s assistance.

“She was just hungry,” Changbin replied, cradling Nia delicately in his arms as he held a bottle to her tiny mouth.

“You’re becoming an expert,” I joked, watching the display with a full heart.

“She’s lovely,” Changbin said, pressing a delicate kiss to Nia’s forehead.

“I think you’re her favorite,” I quipped, winking in his direction.

“I don’t know about that,” Changbin said, but the adoration in his gaze was hard to dismiss. “I’ll take her back to sleep with me.”

I nodded my compliance. “I promised Amelia I would help her with dinner preparations in the kitchens. Will you watch Jay and Ren until I get back?”

“Of course,” Changbin easily agreed, distracted by the small purrs Nia released as her eyelids fluttered closed.

-----------------------------------------------------------

“You’re going to make me jealous,” Amelia joked as she listened to me talk animatedly about my new little pups. We were currently shucking corn behind the outside entrance of the kitchens, settling into an easy rhythm as we conversed.

“Hyunjin would love pups,” I grinned, wiping my hands against my jeans.

“I’m thinking about it,” Amelia admitted. “It would be nice if our pups could grow up together.”

“What’s stopping you?” I asked around an exhausted yawn.

“That,” Amelia grinned. “Those pups are a handful.”

“They’re worth it,” I reassured my friend. “It gets better once you find a routine, and my alphas are always around to help.”

“How are they coping with living together?” Amelia asked with a smirk.

“It was hard at first,” I admitted, recalling the way my competitive mates had argued relentlessly when I first found out I was pregnant. They each had their own opinion about what was best for me, and I was always too tired to argue against them. However, I think we could all agree that moving in together was the right decision since it was important for the pups to be around their fathers. And Chan had already started making room in his cabin, expanding from the back to build more bedrooms for the rest of us.

“I bet it makes things easier.”

“Like this morning,” I nodded. “Changbin was already around to watch over the pups. Chan had an early meeting and Jisung was scheduled to lead a patrol.”

“It would only be Hyunjin and me,” Amelia sighed.

“Not true,” I immediately countered. “I would do my best to help.”

“I think you’re my biggest advocate,” Amelia laughed, letting out a relaxed sigh as she stood from her chair. “I think dinner prep is done if you wanna head out for the day.”

“You don’t need my help tonight?”

“I have some extra hands,” Amelia remarked. “Take another day off. You should cherish the time you have with the pups while they’re still young.”

“Why can’t they be young forever?” I pouted.

“You’ll find a lot of memories of watching them grow up,” Amelia pointed out, ever the optimist. I nodded my head vacantly, tidying up our work area before making my way back to my new home.

-----------------------------------------------------------

The cabin was eerily quiet when I finally arrived. I quickly scented the air, noticing that traces of Jisung and Chan hung stale in the room. “Is anyone here?” I wondered aloud, following Changbin’s heavier scent to his bedroom. The sight that awaited me was perfectly enchanting.

Nia was sleeping soundly, curled on top of Changbin as her father’s eyelids drooped, barely able to stay open. “Binnie,” I addressed my mate who offered me a tired yawn. “Where’s Jay and Ren?”

“Jisung,” Changbin slurred, tilting his head to the side when Nia’s tiny nose sought her father’s scent.

“Jisung?” I repeated, amused by Changbin’s obvious exhaustion.

“He took Jay and Ren...” Changbin trailed off, squinting his eyes as he tried to remember. “Maybe an hour ago?”

“Do you need me to take Nia?” I asked, giggling when Changbin’s eyes closed.

“No,” he protested, one hand resting on Nia’s back. “I’m alright.”

“Is that so?” I questioned, perching myself down on the edge of Changbin’s bed.

“Maybe a nap,” Changbin grunted as his free hand curled around mine. “You could lay down with me?”

“I would love to,” I sighed, taking in the image of my only daughter sleeping peacefully. “But I need to find Jay and Ren.”

“I’ll come with you,” Changbin insisted, keeping a firm grip around Nia as he started to rise.

I quickly reached out to press my palm against his chest. “You don’t have to, Binnie, I know you’re tired.”

“We’re all tired,” Changbin responded. “That includes Jisung.”

“Do you know where he went?”

“Backyard,” Changbin said. “Jay and Ren were wired this morning. Jisung thought he could tire them out.”

“That’s impossible,” I snickered, allowing Changbin to wrap his fingers through mine. “Let’s see what trouble he’s got himself into.”

As expected, Jisung could barely keep up with my rowdy boys as they initiated an aggressive play fight against their unsuspecting father. “What a surprise,” Changbin remarked, holding Nia closer as his half-lidded eyes surveyed the chaotic scene.

“Princess,” Jisung called for me, waving in my direction. “Everything is under control.”

I inclined my head to the side, watching as a visibly distraught Felix joined Changbin and me on the porch. “They’ve been doing this for an hour.”

Jisung collapsed to the ground as my sons climbed on top of his chest, ignoring their father’s protests. “Did they wear you out too?”

Felix frowned. “I wish I had that much energy.”

“That’s why Changbin sticks with Nia.”

I grinned as his gentle voice greeted the three of us with a calming familiarity. I watched as Chan joined the disarray, closing the back door firmly behind him. Changbin glanced over at my oldest mate. “I was already with Nia.”

“He’s playing favorites,” Chan whispered in my ear, hands settling against my waist.

“Channie,” I squealed, falling back against his chest as he dug his fingers into my sides.

Nia’s head rose curiously from Changbin’s shoulder to briefly appraise the situation before she nuzzled back into his neck. “You like your daddy’s scent, don’t you?” I cooed to my youngest daughter, aware of the way Changbin’s eyes lit up with pride.

Jisung grunted as he fell back on his ass, groaning when Jay and Ren took advantage of his vulnerable form. “Do you need help?” I asked, watching Jisung struggle to control the hyperactive boys.

“I’ve got this under control, princess,” Jisung assured me even as he frantically fought to contain the boys’ inspirited energy.

“Is that so?” I questioned with amusement.

“You look like you’re having trouble,” Chan remarked, grinning as he knelt down on one knee to encourage Jay and Ren into his arms. The boisterous boys immediately turned their attention to Chan, leaving Jisung to attack a more willing participant.

“Holy shit,” Jisung coughed, slowly propping himself up with his elbows. “What did you feed them?”

“Love and affection,” I cooed, watching the way Chan easily handled both boys, gathering them into his arms.

Jisung slowly stumbled over to our group, expression wary. “I couldn’t get them to stop all morning.”

“It looks like everything’s fine now,” Felix remarked, studying the way Jay and Ren buried their tiny noses into Chan’s neck.

“They haven’t seen him all day!” Jisung protested. “Ya! Felix, I helped make them!”

I rolled my eyes. “Do you have to say it that way?”

“But I did!” Jisung insisted.

“You did fine, Jisung,” Chan said, clearly sensing Jisung’s impending breakdown. “They could all use a nap anyway.”

I reached over to carefully collect Jay into my arms to help ease Chan’s burden. “I think that’s a good idea.”

Jisung sighed loudly. “Thanks to me they’re ready for their nap.”

“Sungie,” I cooed to my mate. “You’re such a good father.”

Jisung brightened immediately, following the rest of us into the house after we extended our thanks to Felix for helping Jisung attempt to control my oldest pups. In the meantime, Chan and I brought Jay and Ren to their bedroom while Changbin and Jisung brought Nia into hers. The four of us had been in agreement that the boys should be separate from our youngest daughter until Chan could build a new bedroom.

“They’re exhausted,” Chan said, brushing back a few wayward strands of Ren’s messy curls.

“Wait until they get older,” I grinned, brushing my fingers across Jay’s chubby cheeks before meeting Chan in the doorway. My oldest mate leaned down to gently press a kiss to my lips.

“We’ll manage.”

“As long as Jisung isn’t solely responsible for babysitting,” I remarked, grabbing ahold of Chan’s hand as I directed us into the living room. Jisung and Changbin were already waiting, occupying two of the armchairs flanking either side of the massive fireplace.

“I need more than one Felix,” Jisung quipped, eyes watching me as I settled on top of Chan’s lap to relax against the sofa.

“You did just fine,” I reassured my mate.

“They’re certainly a handful,” Chan agreed, “but that’s why we have all four of us to handle things.”

“The super team,” Jisung said, nudging Changbin with his foot. “Why are you tired? You’ve been sleeping with Nia all day.”

“I could handle those boys better than you,” Changbin challenged, although there wasn't a single trace of malice in his tone.

Jisung chuckled at Changbin’s playful comment. “When Nia gets older, she’ll want to play more with her brothers.”

“She can handle them,” I quickly added, noticing the worry in Changbin’s eyes.

“We need more girls,” my mate said, looking at me entreatingly.

I glared at Changbin from the corner of my eye. “No more pups.”

Changbin smirked at the stern expression I wore. “Alright, angel.”

Chan’s fingers lightly ghosted across my lips. “Does that mean you’re happy with everything you have?”

I buried my face closer to his chest as I thought about my beautiful pups and my three powerful mates. “I couldn’t be more satisfied.”

The End.

[ngame989]

“Été” - TGG SVTFOE Fanfic Collection Ch. 2

Writing: @ngame989​​

Art: @toxicpsychox​​ (make sure to follow him for bonus pics from the story!)

Editing: @bmc-nightfury​​, @seddm​​

Alternate fic links - FFnet, AO3

Summary: Summer is ending soon, and with the end of summer comes change, leaving Jackie Lynn Thomas feeling left behind. Can a certain pair of friends help her figure it out?

Comic Page

Masterpost

See below for the text, hope you enjoy!

“‘Mewni Welcome Soiree’, huh? The Echo Creek I know could never be this fancy, the fusion must already be rubbing off on it. It’s still no Paris, but c’est la vie.” Jackie grinned as her fingers traced the flier, one of many stapled haphazardly over the park, if not the whole town itself. All sorts of events and musical guests were outlined in shiny bold letters and pictures to get the message across as clearly as possible. The sweet laughter behind her was its own kind of music to Jackie’s ears.

Chlóe hopped over the back of the bench they had been sitting on to join her girlfriend’s perusal. “Surely it can’t be that bad?” she cautiously inquired, the French accent making itself especially pronounced when her voice lilted higher. “I’ve had a wonderful time in your city! And even if I don’t count you as part of that, it’s still been pretty fun.” Chlóe leaned into her as the two exchanged cheeky grins before Chlóe picked one of the fliers off the wall of the pavilion for herself. “Don’t be so down, there are some interesting-looking things here. Where else would I get to see The World’s Fattest Opossum on display?”

“Touché. It might be cool. What else have you got for us, Echo Creek?" The girls looked over their fliers, trying to find anything to peak their interest. Chlóe spotted a peculiar name under the "Bands" list.

"Looks like there's a concert, too. Mysterious Sonograms?"

Jackie's mind flew to the mediocre artists of said band. "It's the two guys from the taco stand and an otter… I think. Surprisingly less awful than you'd imagine, but that's a low bar."

"What about Infatuation Incarceration?"

"Oh yeah, that's the spin off band Love Sentence's head backup dancer started after their final breakup. They're… not really worth checking out though, to be honest. All their songs are just the dude angstily crying about how he's better off without them anyway."

Chlóe spotted the last name on the list. "The last act is a performance of… is this spelled correctly?"

Jackie scanned her own flier where Chlóe was looking. "'Faiurly Local'... someone typo’d it, but it's a good tune. Never heard of the cover band though, so I think I'll pass. Why don’t we head downtown instead? We can go scope out some new parkour spots!”

Chlóe stood up straight and softly grabbed Jackie’s shoulder, meeting her eyes with a concerned expression. “Tu vas bien?”

“Je ne sais pas.” Jackie leaned her elbows onto the back of the bench, finding it more comfortable to focus on the orange-purple evening sky than her girlfriend. “I’m just worried, y’know? About me, about us. I’m super glad you were able to get a flight home despite all this crazy stuff going on, don’t get me wrong, but it’s gonna suck without you here. The whole Earthni thing is cool and all, too - well, except for the name - but I’m just not up to celebrating it.” It was a wound that had been eating away at her, at both of them, for the last few days. Where would they go from here? Neither was really sure, and they’d avoided talking about it at all. Heck, it’s not like either didn’t know that it had to happen eventually anyway, Chlóe was only here for summer vacation, but it still crept up on them far too quickly to process.

The park fell silent as bittersweet memories washed over her, amplifying her anxieties. Skate camp, before 9th grade - that guy left early for a family road trip before she ever got a chance to get his name, compliment his nollie technique, and see where it went from there. When Marco had so obviously left half of his heart in a different dimension, it sucked then too, but she knew they’d both be happier apart. And now Chlóe was hopping on a plane and going an entire world away. Jackie had always considered herself pretty adaptable, able to just roll with whatever life tossed at her, so why was this particular situation affecting her so much more?

She were interrupted by a soft, fleeting kiss on her cheek and a soothing chestnut gaze as Chlóe took her hand. “Let’s at least get some food first. I heard there’s a stand with hot sauce so spicy that they pay you for it. Vaut le voyage, non?” Jackie shrunk into herself a bit and nodded in what she hoped was a convincing affirmation before strapping on her skateboard helmet, and the pair took off through the park.

Earthni was pretty cool, Jackie had to admit. It was as if some guiding hand lovingly melded them together like clay, taking care to keep all the essential functionality. All the moons were placed in the sky in such a way that the net effect on the tides had remained unchanged in the week since the event, cities and towns and even individual buildings still retained their infrastructure, and the sky had a radiant beauty at all hours of the day and night. Come to think of it, from what she’d gathered secondhand, Mewni did seem eerily similar to Earth in a lot of ways; it was as if there was some special connection that allowed them to flow so harmoniously into one another.

Her muted awe was finally morphed into a much more visceral shock, however, by a more metaphorical union of the dimensions that caught her eye as they skated past the concert. She motioned for Chlóe to stop as she dismounted without looking away from the sight in front of them: Star Butterfly and Marco Diaz just dancing their hearts out to some mediocre pop cover like it was a chart topper sweeping the nation - OK, maybe it technically was one since all the monsters and Mewmans were absolutely enraptured by it. To any other observer, there wasn’t even necessarily anything special about what she was seeing - Chlóe’s perplexity was proof of that - but Jackie knew. Maybe what she had with Marco was never the most serious thing in the world, but she knew him well enough to understand the way he looked at Star as they twirled each other and grooved to the beat. Even Star accidentally tripping him and toppling the pair into a heap on the ground didn’t curb their abundant joy. Jackie quickly pulled out her phone and snapped a picture after they’d gotten back on their feet; she couldn’t help but capture the scene.

No sooner had she lowered the phone than Star dipped Marco down and gave him a quick peck on the lips; what phased Jackie far more was that Marco took it entirely in stride. During their time dating, they could barely even hold hands without him becoming a flustered mess. Heck, even just a few weeks ago he was a nervous wreck over their history. It was already obvious what - or who - had enacted such a change, but Jackie still wanted a closer look.

She signaled Chlóe to stay put and dove into the fairly sizable crowd to find a stealthy route to them. Ducking and weaving through the mingling humans and monsters, she found an open space only a few feet from them. Almost… almost… now! Jackie pounced forward, hoping to catch them off-guard, but mistimed it and collided with Marco right as Star spun him out of her embrace. He squealed at the impact and virtually launched himself backwards, sending Star to the ground in a fit of uproarious laughter. “Oh, Jackie, it’s you!” he said, eyes still wide from the shock.

“Jackie? Hi!” Star jumped up and forward to hug her, unconsciously lifting her in the air; that girl really didn’t know her own strength, did she? “How’s it going?”

“I’d rather ask you two that question,” she replied expectantly as she was set back on the ground. Star and Marco grinned and intertwined their fingers with far less hesitation than she would have expected. Well, there was the direct confirmation she sought. “Let me guess, you two had something to do with the whole Cleaving thing.”

Marco rubbed the back of his neck and glanced down at the ground sheepishly. “It’s a bit of a long story, but, uh, yeah, after-” His attention quickly snapped back to Jackie in a panic. “Oh man, your skateboard! And helmet! I’m so sorry Jackie, I just left it at the portal and then Star was there and I didn’t even think to grab it-”

“Dude, it’s fine, my uncle works for the company, remember? I care way more about hearing this story of yours, but that can wait. I should probably, uh, get back to my girlfriend and let you get back to yours.” As soon as the words left her mouth, the previous anxiety crept back in. She tried to shove it away with a casual wink, but her momentary wince didn’t go unnoticed. As she was walking away, she glanced back over her shoulder. “Well, I’m off to get food, see you guys later,” she said with an uneasy cheeriness..

Marco and Star exchanged a quick glance before they hustled over, the boy putting a hand on Jackie’s shoulder. “Hey, is everything OK? I think I’ve seen you not be totally chill, like, one time ever…”

“Eh, could be better.” A brief moment of silence ensued as she centered herself; of the things she’d taken away from her relationship with Marco, being able to admit that stuck with her most. “Chlóe’s heading back home soon and I’m just pretty bummed, you know?”

He took a moment before responding carefully. “Do you two want to join us? We were going to eat soon, too. I’m pretty sure I brought more than enough nachos for four people,” he nodded in the direction of a picnic basket behind him and chuckled. “It’s kind of our first date, or, um, our first ‘official’ one, anyway. I might have gone a bit overboard.”

“Classic Diaz,” Jackie sniggered. Star rolled her eyes affectionately while nestling into his side and wrapping herself around his arm.

“Don’t worry about it, guys, seriously. I don’t want to intrude, you two have probably dealt with enough heavy stuff lately.”

“Pfft, don’t worry about that We’d love to hang out with you guys! It could be, like, a casual double date or something!” Star chimed in while Marco casually leaned his head against hers.

“If you’re up for it,” Marco hastily added on.

Maybe this was what she needed. She’d spent enough time inside her own head lately that she wasn’t sure she’d be able to enjoy time with Chlóe unless something dragged the fun right out of her, and there wasn’t anyone better at that than these two. “Sounds like fun, I’ll go ask her. Given the legends I’ve heard about Marco’s nachos, I don’t think she’ll need too much convincing, though.”

***

“OK, wait, dude, back up a second. Janna hypnotized you to make you hate nachos? I don’t know if I can associate with someone who’d deprive someone else the joy of Mexican cuisine,” Jackie mock-sternly asked between bites. An assortment of dips and toppings in insulated containers were spread between the four teenagers as she reached over to restock her plate. Chlóe sat beside her with her legs out to the side, enjoying the dinner more than anyone. Echo Creek’s Mexican restaurants clearly didn’t stack up to this, and Jackie’s heart warmed at the sight as much as her queso heated her throat.

“Yeah, but she undid it just a few days ago. Did I mention that she called me her friend?”

“Are you guys sure she’s OK?”

“That’s what I said, Jackie!” Star mumbled out between cheeks comically overstuffed with chips.

“We just saw her yesterday, she’s fine. Well, whatever ‘fine’ is for Janna, anyway. She was happy we were together because it meant, and I quote, ‘so many more ways to blackmail’,” Marco groaned and plopped backwards onto the grass, rubbing his temple in frustration.

Star efficiently scooped up the last of the salsa on her plate with one last chip. “Anyway, I guess that’s the whole story. Weird how this feels normal in comparison.” She motioned down to the rest of the town from their vantage point on top of the hill, where they could see a monster family - easily a few stories tall - having a picnic of their own at least a mile away. Humans were lined up for blocks trying out some Mewni corn stalls that had sprung up around town, and Mewmans for their part had been putting almost every Earth shop at maximum capacity nonstop trying to experience their new world’s culture as well.

“Thank you for dinner, Marco and Star. It’s different having Mexican food that isn’t spicy pain, but I love the flavors, c'était magnifique.”

Jackie leaned back on her hands, thoroughly satisfied from the meal. “Yeah, Diaz, these lived up to the hype. Star’s a lucky girl.”

Star giggled as she helped a blushing Marco upright. The pair began to put away the empty containers into the basket when Star peeked inside with a quizzical expression. “Marco, what the heck is this thing?” She shoved one arm inside, clearly trying to grip something large. Her tongue hung out as she shook the whole basket until a large red disk came out.

“Star, dude, do you not know what a frisbee is?”

She immediately recoiled and flung the disk to the ground, but Marco quickly snagged it before it could roll away. “Sorry, thought you said freezbee. Their stings give you hypothermia. I wonder if they made it to Earthni…” All four teens collectively shuddered at the thought.

“Nah, it’s a disk you can throw at people. Back at skate camp, we had this game where everyone would be in the bowl and you’d have to throw and catch it while in the air. Bonus points for any fancy tricks you pulled off, it was totally sweet. But it’s still fun without the boards, wanna try?” Star nodded at Marco, who flicked the disk to her with a bit of a wobble in its flight. She planted her feet with a burning resolve, her tongue hanging out a bit in concentration. When the disk finally drew near, she jumped and plucked it from the air, whipping it in a frenzied overhead toss aimed directly at Chlóe, who gasped and nimbly pivoted to the side to avoid it, their eyes all bugging out of their heads when they noticed the massive dent in the earth left in the frisbee’s wake.

“I win at frisbee!”

The sun continued its trek towards the horizon as the four tossed the disk around, chatting and laughing and occasionally wiping out on the grass. Marco had shaken off the rust and Star was getting the hang of it once it was properly explained to her, but Jackie still found herself able to go into autopilot and still keep pace. She was going to miss moments like this, just casually enjoying the company of her girlfriend, after over half a year of being together almost all the time. Was this how Marco had felt that summer? She’d already known as much at the time, but feeling some inkling of it stirring inside her gave her a fresh sense of what it really meant, and it just downright sucked. But still, she was glad they were able to enjoy this time together and do something different.

Jackie finally realized that she hadn’t been tossed the frisbee for a few minutes, snapping her out of her rumination. Momentarily disoriented, she looked around until her eyes settled on Marco trying to help Star with her throwing technique. He stood behind her, hands gripping her wrists as he took them through the motions. After a few tries, though, it was pretty obvious that Star was just enjoying being held, and Marco seemed to be in no hurry to finish the lesson himself.

“OK, Marco, all this technique stuff is cool, but check this move out!” Jackie turned towards Star shouting the last few words as she tightened her arms in preparation for a throw. “Spinning Sonic Hug Throw!” She let out a grunt as she whipped the disk as hard as she could, letting her entire body spin on her toes a few times before stopping herself by latching onto Marco in a fierce embrace that almost knocked him off his feet. Marco giggled and returned the affection as Jackie and Chlóe cooed at the adorableness in front of them.

When the hug ended, the two gazed into each other’s eyes until Marco suddenly blinked and looked around. “Uh, Star? Where’s the frisbee?” A soft gasp came from Chlóe a moment later, and everyone followed her line of sight only to find the frisbee stuck in the upper branches of a massive red tree.

“For corn’s sake…” Star facepalmed. “Why do boxing elders have to be here? Like, I know everything from Mewni is here, but why here here, really...” her grumbles trailed off. Wait, did she mean box eld- right, never mind, everything on Mewni is some flavor of weird. Jackie shrugged off the disbelief and took a closer look: the red specks weren’t leaves, they were… boxing gloves? Of course they were.

“I want to climb it.” The voice of her girlfriend shocked her out of her disbelieving stare. She’d been introduced to the wild world of Star Butterfly mere days ago and she was already charging headlong into it?

“Uh, are you sure that’s a good idea, Chló? I don’t know that much about Mewni but if I had to guess, it probably can actually punch you.”

“They have mean left hooks,” Star affirmed nonchalantly.

“It’s covered in those things, dude, how can it have a left- wait, where’s Chlóe?” Jackie looked and saw her girlfriend running over towards the tree with determination etched into her visage.

“OK, my dad has fought enough of them that he’s basically an honorary tree at this point so I’ll go help Chlóe,” Star said before scrambling after her.

Jackie and Marco were the last to jog over towards the base of the tree, stopping a bit short of the base and watching their girlfriends navigate it. Chlóe deftly leapt from branch to branch, dodging all the flailing comically oversized gloves, while Star just kind of clambered up the trunk like a koala batting away all obstacles. Honestly, Jackie knew she should have expected it; Chlóe was fiercely competitive with her parkour, scoffing at the idea of a challenge left uncompleted. Her effortless maneuvering around all the physical hurdles of the Mewnian tree reignited some of her anxiety from earlier in the day.

“Hey, Marco, can I ask you something serious?” Jackie sat down on the grass, hugging her knees to her chest unconsciously, her eyes never leaving the action in front of her, although not out of fear: she was fully confident they could handle themselves.

He joined her on the ground. “Yeah, what’s up?”

“I know this sounds weird, since I was, like, there for all of it, but how did you deal with Star leaving?”

“I, uh, don’t really think I did. Remember that cape? Turns out it was just Star’s dad’s meat blanket the whole time. I don’t even know if he’d washed it first…”

“So that explains why you smelled like a sketchy diner that whole summer!” She finally looked over at him and jabbed his side with her elbow with a smile. “But how did you and Star figure everything out, or whatever? What’s gone through the ole’ Diaz noggin? We were always pretty terrible at the mind reader game, y’know.”

Marco leaned back on his hands and kept his gaze steadily focused on the tree with a loving grin; Star had, seemingly, tamed one of the thicker branches and was valiantly riding it into battle against the others while Chlóe watched incredulously from a safe spot near the top, frisbee in hand. “Honestly? I don’t really know. I- I don’t even think we do have everything figured out. But I guess I felt like… whatever life was going to be, I wanted Star in it more than anything, and just went from there.”

All at once, the truth about why this time was different hit her. She couldn’t say how serious it was, or exactly how she felt. She liked Chlóe a lot, and knew she’d be sad without her there, of course. But she was sure right now that she wanted to put in that effort to make things work, in whatever form that would have to take.

Star’s rapid-fire dialogue quickly became audible as she reapproached with Chlóe in tow, huffing deep breaths between each excited line. “Seriously, Chlóe, how did you even get up there so fast? You would’ve been so famous on Mewni! I guess you still could be now, heh.”

“It’s just parkour, it’s not that amazing.”

“Thanks. This helped, a lot. You’re a pretty good friend, Diaz,” she spoke quietly so only he could hear as the other two drew nearer.

Jackie stood up and shook out the numbness in her legs when the four reunited. The sun was starting to descend behind the horizon when Chlóe leaned her elbow onto Jackie’s shoulder. “Do you think we should leave soon?”

“Actually… I think the concert is still going on. Wanna go check it out, for real this time?”

Marco’s eyes lit up mischievously as he turned to Star, offering her his hand. “May I have one last dance tonight, milady?”

“Just because you’re cute when you say it doesn’t give you a pass, Marco,” Star fumed, still taking his hand anyway. Her face went a bit red when she remembered their friends were still there. “So, anyway, um…”

“Don’t wait up, we’ll be a bit still,” Jackie said, ignoring the suspicious look Chlóe was giving her. “We’ll definitely have to hang out more. Stay amazing, you two.” Jackie gave them each a hug before they turned to walk away.

“Bye Jackie! Bye Chlóe!” Star exuberantly waved at them as she and Marco departed hand-in-hand.

“Au revoir!” As soon as they were out of earshot, Chlóe stepped back and folded her arms, staring Jackie down with a sympathetic expression. “Are you sure you’re fine? You’ve been off all day.” Jackie’s vision roamed their surroundings, avoiding the soft yet piercing orbs trained on her from under her furrowed brow. Finally she found a crude stone bench near the edge of the hilltop, no doubt not from her own dimension. She cautiously took Chlóe’s hand and led them over to it, sitting down and looking over the wonder of the town in the sunset. Jackie lost herself in the splendor, finally feeling able to wholeheartedly enjoy the view, still keeping their fingers laced together.

“About earlier… it’s gonna suck being so far apart. I don’t think anything’s going to change that, really.” Chlóe slowly nodded, letting the words sink in as they both were finally coming to terms with the inevitable. Her eyes sunk to the ground before shutting entirely. “But I think that’s OK. I was all, like, worried that everything would go wrong just because of that, but… I don’t think that’s true, or at least I don’t want it to be.” She nervously laughed, brushing aside a stray hair from her face and finally met Chlóe’s eyes that had not wavered from her during the speech. “It’s not like I was ever thinking about breaking up or whatever, don’t get me wrong, Chló. Just took a while to figure out what I really needed to say, I guess.”

Chlóe put her free arm around Jackie’s shoulder. “Life goes on, you know? But I understand, I’ve been feeling the same way. We can make it work. You’ll have to come out to France sometime, I’m sure there’s all kinds of weird new things we can explore there, too.”

Jackie squeezed her girlfriend’s hand, reciprocating the comforting affection. “Heck yeah, we can. So, wanna go check out that concert?”

“Maybe not anymore. That tree climb was much tougher than I thought it would be, I’m exhausted.” They strapped on their helmets and grabbed their boards again, beginning their slow cruise through the park.

“Dude, you made it seem so easy, you just zoomed up to the top. You’re way too good, I still don’t know how you do it.”

“Merci, merci. But I’m still jealous of all the fancy tricks you can do on that board, so I guess we’ve even. Your friend Star, though, she’s special. I got to see someone tame a punching tree! Nothing in France could beat that,” she laughed in that squeaky way of hers that Jackie always found adorable.

“Marco, too. They’re both something else.”

As they neared the periphery of the park, they passed the concert one last time. The crowd had thinned out, leaving only a handful of the Mewmans and monsters behind. The schmaltzy ballad that the singer was warbling honestly offended her ears a little bit, but the crowd seemed to be mostly ignoring it except the two people she’d been looking for. Star and Marco were far enough from the main stage that Jackie was almost certain they could barely hear the music. If they’d been employing any sort of formal slow dancing technique, they’d long since abandoned it. Marco held Star’s signature horns in his hand, his chin resting on her head buried in his chest as they casually swayed. Jackie thought about waving goodbye, but they wouldn’t have noticed it from their own little world. And if they could still find that happiness together, despite everything, then maybe she didn’t need to worry that much; it would all be worth the trip.