#I am supposed to pretend none of this happened in front of my two eyes

[charles-leclerc-official]

I gotta say there were not nearly enough "secretly married in Vegas" posts and that is an oversight on my part

Exhibits A - E

[justagalwhowrites]

Yearling - Ch. 30: Blood

Joel and Tommy run into trouble on patrol. A continuation of Yearling ch. 1-29 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Canon-typical violence. Plot points from TLOU2. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ Only 

Length: 7.5k

A/N: Hi y’all, I’m stashing this whole chapter below a jump because it’s been brought to my attention that the major event of this chapter is less common knowledge and more of a spoiler than I really realized it was. There is a major plot point for TLOU2 below. I’m sorry I didn’t tag the whole fic that way (going back to update that now) and I apologize if this spoiled things for people who were trying to go in blind. This is the first chapter with any big overlap and if you want to bow out now, I totally understand. My DMs are open if you want to know more without full spoilers and if there’s a way to keep reading without knowing the plot of TLOU2.

AO3 | Chapter One | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

“Dina kissed me.” 

“What!” You yelped and Ellie’s eyes went wide before she clamped a hand over your mouth. 

“Shhhh!” She looked around, her breath rising in front of her. But the only people out right now were inside the stable, a good 50 feet behind you and far enough away that you doubted any of them heard you, even if you were loud. “Jesus, Bambi…” 

She released your mouth and you tried not to giggle. 

“Sorry,” you whispered. “Good for you, kiddo! Told you not to count the girl out because she also fucks men…” 

“There’s no way she meant it,” Ellie rolled her eyes. “Get real.” 

“Why not?” You asked, brows raised. “Why shouldn’t she mean it?” 

“Because she’s Dina,” Ellie said, as though that explained everything. You just looked at her and she rolled her eyes again. “She was just trying to stir shit up because her and Jesse split up…” 

“Uh huh.” 

“And I was convenient,” she finished. “That’s it, that’s all it was…” 

“And you know this because you asked her, I’m sure.” 

“Fuck off,” she snapped. “Look, I didn’t drag you out here to figure that shit out…” 

“You sure about that?” 

“I dragged you out here,” she said, ignoring you, “to try and figure out what the fuck I’m supposed to do now.” 

“Kiss her again,” you shrugged. “That’s what I’d do…” 

“I’m being serious!” She hissed at you. “I have to go on patrol with her in like half an hour, what the fuck am I supposed to do?” 

You sighed and smiled a little, putting your hands in the pockets of the coat Joel had given back to you that morning. He said he hadn’t been wearing it but it had to have been hanging close enough to things he did wear and it smelled a bit like him. 

“First, you need to calm down,” you said gently. She looked like she was going to snap at you but you silenced her with a look. “I know it’s hard but regardless of how you want this to turn out, try not to be in your own head about it, OK? She’s still your friend and I’m guessing you want her to stay your friend, right?” 

“Duh.” 

“So eloquent,” you said and she rolled her eyes. “Look, you have two options. You can pretend it never happened and see if she brings it up or you can be up front about it and ask her.” 

“Is there a way to bring it up without looking like a desperate fucking loser?” She asked, brows raised. 

You shrugged. 

“Tough line to walk but I think you’ve got it in you.” 

“Jesus…” 

“Ellie,” you took her shoulders and made her actually face you. “It will be OK. Might be awkward for a bit but it’s not the end of the world. I promise. You can talk to her. She’s your friend for a reason and it’s because you’re kind and you’re smart and you’re funny. Even without the help of Will Livingston. None of that shit changes just because you kissed. Alright?” 

“Yeah,” she said, dropping her head to your shoulder with a heavy sigh. You put your arms around her and gave her a little squeeze but when she pulled back from you, her eyes were narrowed. “You’re in a weirdly good mood.” 

You frowned. 

“No I’m not.” 

“Uh yeah, you are,” she said, stepping back and looking you up and down as though she she were inspecting you. You just raised your eyebrows at her, expectant, when her mouth dropped open for a moment before she shifting to a shit eating grin. 

“Ellie…” 

“You fucked Joel!” 

“We need to have another conversation about the fact that what happens between my legs is none of your business,” you muttered, turning her around to head back toward the stable. 

“No we don’t,” she said. “This is great, you two have been so depressing the last few months…” 

“We have not!” 

“Please,” she rolled her eyes. “You were basically dead for weeks and Joel barely left the house for who knows how long.” 

“That… was less recent,” you said. “And it’s not your job to worry about us so let’s just…” you stopped just short of the stable doors. “How did you know?” 

“Know what?” 

“About…” you lowered your voice. “Joel. Not that I’m admitting to anything.” 

She smirked. 

“That coat’s been hanging in his front closet since you left.” You looked down at yourself and groaned. Her cocky smile grew. “You wanted the coat again. Bingo.” 

“Well just… keep it to yourself, alright?” You said, heading for the door. “I have no idea how to handle this with Savvy yet so cool it for bit. Please.” 

“I can keep my mouth shut you know,” she said as you opened the door to the stable and she went in. She opened her mouth to keep talking but Dina came up to her, smiling, and she froze instead. 

“Hey Ellie,” she smiled a little bigger before looking at you. “Bambi, good to see you.” 

“You too,” you said, clapping Ellie on the shoulder. “Have fun out there.” 

She glared at you over Dina’s shoulder and you just shrugged and winked at her before taking care of the final things you needed to before getting everyone out the door on patrol. 

You seriously considered, for a moment, taking Joel’s hand and just dragging him back home when he told you that you’d be going out separately. Things with him were so raw and delicate and new again. Neglecting it for two days felt dangerous somehow, a tension setting into your limbs before you and Julie headed out. 

You were always last to leave the stables, always waiting until you knew the rest of the patrol was situated even though you knew Olivia could handle things just fine without you. She smiled - a vaguely amused look on her face - as you went back over everything for the third time. 

“I promise, it’s all good,” she said eventually. “Please go focus on killing infected and staying safe and leave managing the horses to me.” 

On the way out of town, you stopped by where the working dogs were kept and asked if you could bring Gatling along, Julie looking a little skeptical as the dog jumped on Renaissance and settled between your legs, her head draped over your bicep. 

“Used to ride like this with her all the time,” you said, kissing the top of the dog’s head. Gatling licked her lips once and curved her body into yours as you sat back in the saddle to make sure she had room. “I’ll let her down once we’re good and underway, she’ll keep up. She’s great at spotting infected and I’m guessing she could be a great patrol dog once we get her adjusted to working with more than just me…” 

“She definitely looks like she can hold her own,” Julie said, watching as Gatling started scanning the horizon, her ears perked and listening, ready to jump off your horse and run down any apparent threat. “What kind of dog is she, anyway?” 

“She’s a Belgian Malinois,” you said, giving her a scratch behind the ears. “They were police and military dogs before. She saved my ass from infected more than once and she kept my girl alive when I couldn’t…” You kissed her head again and she turned to lick your cheek before going back to watching for threats. “She’s a good girl.” 

“Good to know I’ve got someone out here who can really watch my back,” Julie teased lightly. “Not sure I trust you to do it…” 

“Why not?” You asked, gaping at her. “I’m a great shot, keep you alive no problem…” 

“You forget I saw you trying to show Ellie and Savvy how to shoot a basketball that one time,” she smiled a cocky smile. “You barely hit the backboard…” 

“OK shooting a basketball is a completely different animal,” you waved her off. “Where it counts, my aim is solid. Saved Tommy once.” 

“Bullshit.” 

“It’s true,” you said, nudging Renaissance a little faster. “Ask Joel…” 

“Joel, hm?” She brought her horse alongside yours. “Things happening there?” 

You tried to hide your smile but felt the edges of your mouth curve up, anyway. 

“Good for you!” Julie said. “Both because you’re my friend and I want you to be happy but also because I like being right and goddammit, if I’m going to get shot down for a man of all people at least it’s a man I was right about.” 

You laughed a little before you remembered you had things weren’t just magically fixed with Joel yet.

“Do me a favor and don’t mention it to anyone?” You said, looking down at Gatling. “I need to tell Savvy…” 

The dog looked up to you at the mention of her name and you gave her a small scratch. 

“Oh, right,” Julie winced a bit. “Yeah, that might be rough.” 

“Yeah,” you sighed heavily. “I need to figure out a way to do this without losing both of them. I can’t do that again, I just… I can’t.” 

“You’ll figure it out,” she said gently. “It will be OK. Just have to believe it, it’ll happen.” 

“I’ll do my best,” you smiled a little at her. “How’s shit with Karen, by the way?” 

“Oh God,” she laughed. “I’m not sure how much I should tell you…” 

The patrol was easy enough until the snow started flying. It was still, the two of you talking, Gatling sometimes running ahead and acting more like a puppy than you remembered her being before, making you smile. It felt like if she could be like this - young and free and more than what survival had made her - so could Savvy. She would get there someday. You could get her back and make her understand once she was ready. 

Once the snow picked up, you and Julie decided to hunker down instead of pressing on to what was meant to be your final spot for the day. Though you were pretty sure you were only an hour or so shy of it if the weather weren’t working against you. 

“OK this is bullshit is what this is,” Julie said as she stomped snow off her boots and shook it out of her hair. You laughed a little as you got a fire going in the fireplace of the old house you’d reached for the night. It was just at the edge of a small subdivision, a spot you’d ridden past before but never spent much time in. The two of you had gotten the horses settled in the garage and Julie had done a quick walk around the immediate area to make sure there were no threats before coming in to settle for the night. “White, fluffy bullshit.” 

“Not getting you in the holiday spirit?” You teased. “Thanksgiving is coming up, Christmas right after that…” 

“Yeah, I’m already counting down until spring,” she said, shucking her coat and joining you by the fire. “I can only live with this for so long.” 

“I kinda like it,” you said as the fire caught the larger log and you watched it start to go up. “I like that seasons actually change here. It definitely made it easier to mark the passage of time when I didn’t have a calendar.” 

“Well I guess when you put it that way,” she sighed dramatically and you laughed. “But now that you’re in Jackson, we’ll keep you straight on the passage of time. The snow can go.” 

Julie had brought a bottle of whiskey from the Bison - “A perk of the job,” she said - and you were reminded of sleepovers when you were in high school when you and your friends would swipe booze from your parents’ liquor cabinets and get drunk around a bonfire. 

“I feel like we’re going to regret this in the morning,” you said, snug in your sleeping bag on the floor as the fire dimmed, head fuzzy and limbs tingling from the alcohol. Gatling’s head rested on your stomach.

“We can just sleep in a bit,” she scoffed and you heard her adjust on the couch. “What are they gonna do, fire us from patrol for running late? Doubt it.”

You laughed a little. 

“Guess there’s not much to contend with out there right now, anyway,” you said, closing your eyes. “Been quiet as hell all day. Doubt it’ll change overnight.” 

“It’d better not,” she said, sounding sleepy. “Better not be more snow, either.” 

You laughed once. 

“Better snow than infected,” you said. “Or raiders.” 

She didn’t respond and the room was quiet for a moment before you heard a soft snore coming from the couch. 

You laughed and then sighed, pulling a hand from the sleeping bag to scratch Gatling behind the ears. She sighed and curled up tighter to you. 

“It’s gonna be different when we go back,” you whispered to her, absently stroking one of her soft ears. “You can still come home with me, though. Maybe sleep with Savvy instead for a bit. I’m sure you miss her.” 

You tried to think about how to tell Savvy about Joel. It would have been a hard conversation under any circumstance, you thought. Not one you’d ever thought you’d need to have when you’d started caring for her. The idea of being with anyone long term then had been so foreign it hadn’t even crossed your mind. After Marisa, you’d given up on that. Just the occasional lover when there was a woman around who was interested as she was passing through had been enough. 

But Jackson was different. Joel was different. You had safety and security in Jackson and you loved Joel in a way you’d never thought you’d find, especially not after spending so long alone. But how could you tell Savvy something that you knew would hurt her? How could you tell her anything at all when she hadn’t spoken to you in weeks? 

“She’s gonna come around, right?” You whispered to Gatling. You felt her lick her lips and sigh against you. You closed your eyes but left your hand on the dog. “I’ll get her to trust me again. I will.” 

When the pounding on the front door woke you up, you were barely even aware you’d been asleep. But it was daylight outside and Gatling was standing near the front door, crouched low and snarling. 

“Wha…” Julie lifted her head, a groggy look on her face. 

“I got it,” you said, head spinning as you shoved your way out of your sleeping bag. “You stay put.”

“Thank fuck,” she groaned, dropping her head back on the couch and draping her arm over her eyes. You laughed and shook your head, going for the door. 

“Gatling.” The dog looked up at you, ready to obey. “Heel.” 

She fell back from the door and went to your leg, still tight against you, as you opened the door. 

“Glad I found you,” Gene, Jesse’s patrol partner said, pushing past you into the house without waiting for an invitation. “It’s a mess out there…” 

“That’s why we stopped here for the night,” you said, leaving the door open and nodding to Gatling, who immediately ran outside to pee. You waited by the door and let her back in, the dog sticking to your side again. 

“We can’t be that late getting out of here,” Julie grumbled, sitting up and pinching the bridge of her nose. “Not that it’s not just a blast to see you, Gene…” 

“We’re missin’ people,” he said, more to you than Julie. 

“What?” You frowned, crossing your arms over your chest, the after effects of the alcohol suddenly fading fast. “What do you mean we’re missing people, who are we missing?” 

“Joel and Tommy,” he said. “They never made it where they were supposed to last night and we can’t find ‘em….” 

“They probably stopped for the night like we did,” Julie waved him off. “Did you not see the weather last night? It was a shit show…” 

“Probably,” Gene nodded. “But they’d have made it there by now and we didn’t see them comin’ back down, either. No sign of ‘em. Ellie and Dina weren’t where they were supposed to be, either, but we at least found a fuckin’ trail for them, sent Jesse on to get them back in one piece…” 

You were already moving to put your boots on, heart pounding, Gatling giving you a small whine. You put a handful of jerky on the ground for her and refilled her water dish before you started packing up your sleeping bag. 

“I’m sure they’re fine…” Julie said, actually sitting up in the sleeping bag now, her legs pulled into her chest and watching you closely. 

“We should split up,” you said, pulling on your coat. “Cover more ground…”  

“Don’t know if that’s smart…” Gene began but you cut him off. 

“I can handle myself,” you said, harsher than you’d really meant to. “I’ve got Gatling, I’ve got my guns, I’ve got my axe. That’s all I had for 20 damn years and I made it just fine then. If you’re worried, you and Julie can stick together but I’m not gonna sit here and talk about how to minimize risk when they’re out there dealing with who knows what…” 

“Bambi,” Julie said gently, getting off the couch and taking you by the shoulders. “It’s OK.” 

“No,” you shook your head. “It’ll be OK when I find him in one piece, then it’ll be OK, I’m not…” 

“Gene and I will go one way,” she cut you off. “You and Gatling go the other. We’ll cover more ground. OK?” 

Gene sighed, looking between the two of you. 

“You got a death wish, don’t make me stop you,” he said gruffly. “Gonna go get my horse some water, we can head out.” 

You watched him go, a nervous energy coursing through your body. 

“Hey,” Julie said, taking your face carefully in her hands and making you look at her. “It is OK. It’s Joel and Tommy. They’re very, very good at this. They’re OK.” 

There was a pinch of tears at the back of your throat that you had to fight to swallow past. She took your hands, giving them a squeeze. 

“I can’t lose him now,” your voice was thick. “I just got him back, I can’t…” 

“I know,” she said softly, a sad smile on her face and you were struck, for a moment, by just how pretty she was. She pressed a soft kiss to your cheek, her lips lingering on your skin for a second, before she pulled back. “We’ll find him. We will.” 

“Thank you,” you nodded and took a deep breath, one tear slipping free, before looking down at your dog who was watching, ready and waiting. 

“Gatling, heel.” 

She moved to be immediately with you and you went to the garage, quickly saddling your horse and mounting up. You called Gatling up and she settled at the front of your saddle, already watching for incoming threats with her ears perked as you set off. 

You pushed Renaissance harder than you should have through the deep snow, trying to reach some part of Joel and Tommy’s patrol path so you could find some sense of where they might have gone. 

It wasn’t long before you found the path cut by a group of infected. A large one, judging by the footprints in the snow. You didn’t see a sign of Joel or Tommy but the swath of disturbed snow and brush from the hoard as so thorough you doubted you’d be able to tell if two horses had come that way, too. And, knowing Tommy and Joel, they’d have tracked the infected…

You looked higher for a moment, above where people would disturb branches and realized some branches on trees were clean of snow - too high for a person to bump on their own but just the height a tall man on horseback would hit. 

“Goddammit,” you muttered, steering Renaissance in that direction and pushing her on. 

The horse was breathing hard and heavy when you reached a mansion outside the normal patrol area, fully gated with piles of dead infected outside. You looked through your binoculars and saw tracks from the horses leading inside. But something about it set you on edge. Something wasn’t right. 

You commanded Gatling down and tied Renaissance to a tree that provided at least some shelter. 

“Back soon,” you said quietly, giving her a scratch and offering her an apple from your pack. You made sure your weapons were loaded, rifle at the ready, handgun and knife at your hip, axe across your back. Gatling looked at you, licking her lips once, waiting for a command. 

“Gatling, heel,” you said. “Hunt.” 

She latched onto your side like glue, crouched lower and keeping her mouth closed and you moved as quickly as you could for the gates of the mansion. 

There was no one guarding the place that you could see but you closed the gate behind you. If that had been enough to keep infected out before, you weren’t about to argue with it now. There were signs of plenty of people here, footprints of various sizes all heading for shelter inside. You tried not to think about the fact that you might have to torture information out of someone who left those footprints. If they had taken Joel and Tommy’s horses, you’d have to work quick to find what they knew so you could get to them. Torture could be the best option and, if it meant saving their lives, it was a price you were happy to pay. Because they had to still be alive, they had to be. 

The mansion was dark and almost eerily still. It reminded you of some of the places you’d visited when dropping of horses you’d trained to be trail animals for rich assholes before the outbreak, the trappings of extreme wealth couched in some idyllic, fictional version of the wild west. People who in places like this couldn’t handle the real thing. Real wildness would chew them up and spit them out. 

You crept through the house, looking for some sign of people, too afraid to call for Joel and Tommy and potentially bring down who knows how many people on you when you heard it, an agonized cry in a voice you knew, one you knew better than almost anyone else. 

“Joel,” you breathed, and you were running, Gatling at your heels. 

You knew that you should stop, assess, try to form a plan but he screamed again and you plowed ahead. A plan didn’t matter, all that mattered was one thing: getting to Joel. 

You had to get to him. 

He had to be OK. 

He had to be. 

*** 

Joel knew what it was like to die. 

He’d come close enough enough times over the years. Even before the apocalypse began he had a few near shaves. A fall off a ladder at a job site and the thought of “this is it” as he crashed down, the contemplation of what would happen with his daughter if he was gone, if he’d done enough to make it that she would be OK. A car accident that knocked him out and disoriented him enough that, for a moment in the hospital, he thought he was dead. 

The times since had been different, more acute. For a while, it felt like dying would have been a mercy. There was some innate biology that kept his body pushing to survive when his mind saw death as a welcome outcome when he got stabbed or shot when he was taking what he needed to survive or getting the shit kicked out of him when he got overrun smuggling. 

This, though, was something else. He didn’t want to die anymore, not really. He had you and Ellie and even Savvy. He had a reason to live now - live, not just survive - and he wanted it, wanted that life that was hanging there, so tantalizingly close on the horizon as heat of his blood pooled around him. 

He still wasn’t entirely sure what happened, how he’d ended up here like this. He’d reached the girl he’d seen through the binoculars as she damn near got bit, he’d shot the infected and pulled her up just as its teeth were getting close to her neck. 

“We gotta move!” Tommy yelled, shooting another infected. 

Joel gave the girl a once over as quick as he could. 

“You bit?” He asked. She was panting for breath but shook her head. “Got a gun?” She nodded. “Good, let’s go.” 

He tucked her behind him and led the way, trying to find a way through and out. There were dozens of infected, riled up and searching for something to sink their teeth into, desperate for someone to turn. 

“Shouldn’t be this damn many!” Tommy yelled as they scrambled back toward the horses. “Why are there this damn many?” 

“Worry about that later!” Joel snapped, dragging the girl along behind him. She stopped and shot two that were getting too close for comfort and, even in that moment, Joel could appreciate that she was a good shot. “We have to get the fuck away from here, try and lose ‘em…” 

“Think we can get all the way back to town?” Tommy asked, reloading his gun. 

“Hell no,” Joel shook his head. “Need to find somewhere else to hole up…” 

“My friends,” the girl said, looking between the two of them. “We’ve been staying at a mansion, not far from here. It’s got a fence around it, we’ve got the perimeter secure, if we can get there we’ll have help…” 

Joel and Tommy looked at each other. It was unlikely a girl this young would be running with raiders, more likely a group just passing through as they headed for the coast from a QZ. Tommy shrugged and Joel looked back to her. 

“Right,” he said. “We’ll head there, we got horses outside, you can ride with me and just tell us where to go. I’m Joel, that’s my brother Tommy, we’re from a settlement a few hours from here…” 

“Joel,” she said, something shifting in her eyes when she said it. 

“Right,” Joel said, not paying much attention. That seemed stupid, now. But he’d been so worried about Ellie, about you, about getting out of there to make sure you both were OK. “What’s your name, kiddo?” 

“Abby,” she said, an odd twinge in her voice. “My… I’m Abby.” 

They made it to the horses by the skin of their damn teeth, infected at their heels the whole way. 

The kid was right, at least. The mansion was secure, her friends clearing the area with molotov cocktails, infected burning just outside the gates. 

“Jesus Christ that was close,” Tommy laughed, clapping Joel on the shoulder. “Fuck, ain’t come that close in a while…” 

“Couldn’t get a good look at ‘em,” Joel said, looking back at the burning bodies. “See any bullet holes? Any sign they might have run into the girls?” 

Tommy’s giddy smile over surviving faded and he gave Joel’s shoulder a squeeze. 

“I’m sure they’re alright, Joel,” he said. “Shit, Bambi’s a deadeye. And you taught Ellie everything you know. They probably didn’t even come across these fuckers and if they did, they’re fine. They’re fine, both have made it through worse than a few infected…” 

“We should get inside,” Abby said, looking more at one of her friends than at Joel. “Now.” 

Things seemed normal then. Tommy was trying to get the group to come back to Jackson, Joel was worrying about you and Ellie. 

And then they introduced themselves to the group and it shifted. Just like it had with Abby, the change sudden and sharp. 

“Y’all act like you’ve heard of us or somethin’,” Joel said, thinking it was a joke. His mind was still elsewhere, still on you, still on Ellie, still on making sure you both were OK. He wanted to be back in Jackson, back in his quiet house, back in bed with you, pillows actually brought up from the living room and you close enough that he could trace little patterns over your soft skin. 

“Because they have.” 

He didn’t even see the shot coming, didn’t have a chance to warn Tommy to run, his brother on the ground - unconscious? Dead? He wasn’t sure - before he could even think. Joel screamed as the bullet tore through his leg and he went down, straining to get to Tommy through the pain but they swarmed him, these kids his brother had just been trying to talk into coming back to Jackson. They held him down, his back to a wall as Abby knelt in front of him, her face twisted into a snarl. She looked so different than she had when he’d first spotted her, alone and afraid and cornered the way he was now. 

“Joel Miller,” her teeth were gritted, the rifle tight in her grip. 

“Who are you?” He managed, pulling against the people at his arms, people who looked like kids, fucking kids. 

“Guess.” 

“Look,” he grunted and gave his arms a yank but they thrust him back against the glass. “Don’t know what I did to ya but I know I didn’t do it on purpose. Done a lot of shit in my time but I don’t hurt kids and you’re a bunch of kids…” 

“You kill my dad on purpose?” She pressed the barrel of the gun to his chin. “You slaughter a whole hospital of people who were just trying to save humanity on purpose?”

Joel’s stomach dropped. Of course. Of course saving Ellie would come back for him. Of course now that he finally had a life that was worth living it was getting ripped away for the one thing he couldn’t regret. 

“I did what I had to do,” he said, trying to free himself again, even though he knew it was futile. “But it was just me. Do what you need to do, make whatever speech you got saved up, but leave my brother out of it.” 

She squared her jaw, a look of disgust on her face as she got to her feet. She shoved her gun into the hands of the man - barely a man, almost still a boy, Joel thought - beside her. 

“Tourniquet his leg,” she snapped. The others looked around, hesitating. “Do it!” 

She stalked off as another girl obeyed, Joel trying not to scream through the pain as she tightened the belt around his leg. His head was still spinning when she came back into view, a golf club in her hands. 

“You don’t get to ask me for a damn thing,” she looked at him with so much rage, so much hate that, for a moment, he pitied her. That someone so young was so angry and in so much pain, that her father had cast his lot in with a bunch of child killers and paid with his life, leaving her alone, was tragic. “And you don’t get to rush this.” 

She jerked her head toward the people holding him in place and they looked at each other for a moment before stepping back. He tried to move but his leg was fucking useless and Abby swung the club, catching him in the arm before she forced him all the way to the floor with a pained cry. 

He wasn’t sure how long he’d been here now. Consciousness was hazy. So was the feeling in his limbs. At times, it was like he was floating, far outside his body and somewhere far softer and warmer and kinder than here. Part of him was back in his living room, almost a year ago now, on Christmas Eve when it was just you and him and he buried himself inside the hot clutch of your body by the glow of the holiday lights. He was lost in the feel of you, so soft and warm below him. He wasn’t sure he’d ever felt closer to another person in his life, lacing his fingers with yours and looking into your eyes as you came. He’d promised to take care of you then and he’d meant it, he’d meant it so far beyond that moment inside of you, he’d meant it for the rest of his life he’d take care of you. 

He just hadn’t thought it would be so soon. 

At least, he thought, he’d made things right with you. At least he’d gotten to tell you that he loved you again, at least he wasn’t dying wondering if you could ever have forgiven him. At least things were right with Ellie, at least she’d loved him again and she’d let him love her the way she deserved to be loved. At least she had you and Savvy now, people who would love her that way, too, and make sure she was OK. She was going to need someone to make sure she was OK when he was gone, she was so stubborn and she tried to be so much stronger than she needed to be. She needed someone. So did you. 

At least he’d get to be with Sarah again. She was so much closer now than she’d been before, barely out of reach now, somewhere quiet and safe and peaceful. Just far enough away that what was happening now couldn’t reach her. At least she wasn’t seeing this. At least you and Ellie weren’t seeing this.

Something shifted in the room, the club not landing on Joel’s body again, chaos drawing him back into his body again. 

Everything hurt, like he’d been put through a meat grinder. He wasn’t sure he’d ever hurt this much, at least not physically. Every breath was pain. He’d been lying here long enough that some of the blood pooling around his legs had gone cold. 

There was a vicious snarl, the crack of a gunshot and he realized, suddenly, what happened. 

“Gatling!” He could barely adjust his head enough to see where you were. Your rifle was on the ground but so was the only other gun Joel remembered seeing in the room. Your axe was tight in your hands as you threw one of the men back with a roar. You kicked the guns at your feet behind you and pointed to Joel and snapped your fingers. “Guard!” 

The dog ran to him and crouched around his body, hunched low, snarling and barking. You screamed and Joel struggled to see what was happening, tried to get up but he was only able to make it a few inches off the ground before he collapsed back down, his body too broken to properly obey. You were so close, you were in trouble and he tried to focus on it. He had to get you out of here, he had to take care of you, he’d promised to take care of you. He was supposed to protect you, that’s what he was built to do and he was failing. 

“Gatling, bite!” Your command was more of a shriek, sharp and fearful.

The dog shot away from him for a moment, a snarl followed by a pained wail and Joel could see enough to make out that the animal had tackled someone near you as you scrambled to your feet, more of them coming for you. Joel tried again to move but his injured leg gave out that time, collapsing below him before he could put even half his weight on it. 

“Gatling, release!” The screaming stopped and he heard another snap. “Guard!” 

The dog went back to him, snarling and snapping and 

“Bambi!” 

Joel turned his head too quick to the door, his neck screaming in pain, to see Ellie standing there, her eyes wide.

“Ellie!” He yelled through gritted teeth. 

“Go!” You screamed at her, bringing your axe around, swinging wide on another person coming for you, just catching their arm. “Get help, get Jesse! Go!” 

You circled toward the door, axe up, daring any of them to try to follow her. 

“You’re not a part of this!” Abby prowled toward you. “Don’t make me kill you, too.” 

“He’s a part of this so I am, too,” you panted. “If you wanna try and kill me, you better do it quick and you better be damn sure you do it right because the second I’m down, that dog will rip your throats out one by fucking one. She’s done it before, I’ve seen it. You’ll have to kill me - which she won’t take lyin’ down - and get to the guns behind me to take her down. She works quick, hell of a lot quicker than me. If you’re fightin’ both of us, you don’t stand a chance. You that confident? I am. So is she.” 

Gatling snarled as if on cue. 

“Other option is to get the fuck out of here,” you said. Joel could just see you around the dog, blood dripping from your side, lip split open. “We got backup comin’, we’re from a settlement of hundreds and we’ve fought off raiders and infected for fuckin’ years, think we can handle a band of fucking children without much trouble. This worth dyin’ for? Right now, I got your death warrant. Up to you if I sign it.” 

“Abby,” one of the men said. “Let’s go.” 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” She snapped. “You want to just go? Now? Let him live?” 

Gatling snarled again. 

“You’re runnin’ short on time!” You growled, teeth clenched tight. “Now or never!” 

“You lost control of the situation,” the man hissed. “We’re not all dying for your fucking revenge mission.” 

She turned toward Joel and he watched the hatred and the rage move through her. He watched her think about bringing the club down one more time, just to see if she could land a final, killing blow before the dog struck hers. She moved a fraction of an inch toward him and Gatling adjusted, a vicious bark and a snarl ripping from her. 

“He wouldn’t want you to die for this,” the man said quietly, so low Joel doubted you could hear. “And Miller probably won’t survive this, anyway. It’s done. Let’s go.” 

“Fine,” she bit out, throwing the club aside. Joel tried his best to follow her with his eyes, praying that she wouldn’t go for you. Once the people had moved away from him toward you and the door, you called Gatling to you, the dog standing between you and the aggressors, snarling and threatening. They left, watching you closely, without a word.

The door closed and you dropped the axe, grabbing a gun from behind you on the ground and limping for Joel, blood dripping down your leg. 

“Joel,” you fell to your knees beside him. He tried to say something but all that left him was a pained moan. “You’re OK, I’ve got you, you’re alright…” 

“Tommy,” he managed, panting for breath. “Check… Tommy….” 

“OK,” you said softly, brushing his hair back from his forehead. “Gatling, guard.” 

You snapped your fingers and pointed to Joel again. The dog obediently came and positioned herself between him and the door, body like a coiled spring ready to attack. You went to Tommy and checked his pulse before adjusting him. Joel heard him groan and you said something he couldn’t quite make out before you were back to him, a bag with you this time. 

“They’ve gotta have something in here,” you said, ripping through the contents. 

“Baby…” 

“Tommy’s alright,” you said, glancing at Joel before going back to the bag. “He’s comin’ around. Ellie will be back soon, she’s bringing help, it’s going to be OK Joel, it is…” 

“Baby.” 

“Hush.” 

You found what you were looking for, a bag with some medical stuff inside. You set it nearby and looked over Joel’s back, wincing as you did. 

“Need to look at the front of you, too,” you said. “I’m going to roll you over, alright?” 

“Baby…” 

“Shut up, Joel.” 

Your hands shook and he cried out in pain as you moved him onto his back, flinching when you saw his leg.

“Jesus,” you whispered. “What’d they do to you?” 

“Baby,” he said again, managing to lift a hand enough to almost reach your face. You took it, gently guiding his bloody palm the rest of the way to your cheek as you leaned down into it. “You’re bleedin’.” 

“Oh,” you looked down at yourself. “It’s fine, I’ll be fine…” 

“Need to take care,” he had to stop for a second, grinding his teeth through the pain as it wracked his body. It took him a moment to catch his breath. “Care of yourself. I’m… I can’t make it back, not like this…” 

“Shut up, Joel.” 

“Promised to protect you,” he said, brushing his thumb over your cheekbone. “Lemme do it.” 

“Protect me later,” you said, setting his hand down and ripping the bag of medical gear open with your teeth. “Going to put bandages on your leg, see if we can let the tourniquet off, save the leg…” 

“Baby.”

“Shut UP, Joel!” 

He watched you work for a moment and you felt farther and farther away with every breath. He could feel himself fading and he wished you’d just stop, that you’d take care of yourself and just hold him while he could still feel you. 

“Need you to look after Ellie,” he said as you wound bandages around his thigh. “She’s gonna act like she doesn’t need anyone but she does and…”

“And she has you,” you cut him off with a glare. “So it doesn’t matter.” 

You released the tourniquet on his leg and it was more of a relief than he’d expected it to be, the pain of it fading to a dull enough roar that he’d forgotten it was there until the weight of it was lifted. 

“Gotta get this spot at your side, too…” you adjusted his shirt and leaned over him and he got a better look at your own side, a bright red splotch growing on your shirt, a long gash going from your ribs down toward your stomach. 

“You’re bleedin’, sweetheart.” 

“I know,” you said. “Getting you fixed up first…” 

“Baby.” 

“Joel, I swear…” 

“Need to get you and Tommy back,” he needed to stop for a second to catch his breath, the rise and fall of his chest straining his ribs. “Can’t… can’t die knowin’…” 

“You’re not dying here,” you snapped, your voice thick. “I just got you back, you’re not dying here, you’re coming home and you’re going to be OK and…” 

You sat back, looking at the spot on his side that you’d just bandaged, wiping your nose on the back of your wrist as you did. 

“Gotta take care of yours now,” he said, eyes tracing the spot at your side. But you shook your head. 

“Outta gauze.” 

“Baby…” 

“It’s not that bad,” you sniffed. “I’ll just… hold pressure until Ellie gets back. It’s OK, you’re gonna be OK, I can’t….” 

“Here,” he ground his teeth, breathing through another wave of pain. “Lay… lay with me. Cut side up, keep the blood from flowin’ too easy.” 

You looked at him for a moment before nodding and lying delicately next to him. He adjusted as best he could so he could see you, touch you. You’d been hit in the face at least twice, one of your eyes swelling shut and your lip split open. But you were still beautiful, so damn beautiful. 

“I’m so sorry baby,” he said softly. 

“Joel…” 

“Wanted… wanted so much more time with you and the girls,” he said quietly. Your skin was soft, so soft it seemed like the sensation of it might be the only thing holding him to the earth. “I’m so sorry we’re not gettin’ that…” 

“Stop talking like that,” you were crying now, not making any attempt to stop it. 

“It’ll be OK sweetheart,” he said. “You’ll… you’ll be alright. Ellie’s gonna need you, keep an eye on her for me. Keep her outta trouble. Savvy, too. She loves you… she’ll… she’ll come around…” 

“Joel,” you whispered, reaching out to cup his face, your fingers in his curls, one of the only places on his body he wasn’t bleeding. 

“I’m so happy we made things right,” he said, his eyes searching yours. He wondered, if he watched you closely enough, if he could bring the precise color of them with him wherever he was going. “I love you so damn much, sweetheart. Need you to know that, OK? I love you.” 

“I love you too,” you breathed. Your skin was so soft and your breath was warm on his skin. “I love you. I love you.” 

You said it again and again. It was the last thing Joel heard before he passed out. 

Next Chapter

A/N: Hi y'all ❤️

Again, begging for you to trust me, OK? OK.

I do love you but... feel free to yell at me in the comments or in my asks or DMs. I'll be responding to asks about the last chapter soon now that this one is up.

Thanks for going on this crazy ride with me!! It truly means the world.

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[kikyoupdates]

Indebted ⭑˚🥀⭑ 𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑟𝑡

yandere!ocs x f!reader

yandere, reverse harem, yandere reverse harem, original characters x fem!reader, slowburn, isekai

Following your mother’s recent passing, you are visited by a group of men claiming that your father abandoned all his debt and obligations, leaving you to take his place.

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The car ride was unsurprisingly tense. You were crammed inside the same vehicle as Ryu, with his broad shoulders pressed up against yours in the back seat. He’d said that he intended for you to work and pay off your father’s debt, but you wouldn’t be surprised if he changed his mind and decided to kill you instead.

And yet he still had the nerve to try and make small talk with you.

“Oh, I suppose I should apologize for how sudden our visit was,” he commented offhandedly. “I am sorry for your loss. You must still be in the process of grieving, but life goes on, as they say.”

His tone was dripping with insincerity, and you had every right to want to knee him in the balls, but you also had no desire to accelerate your death. So, you stayed quiet. Avoided eye contact, avoided his questions. You just stayed as still as possible and tried to keep from breaking down.

After a little while, the car parked right outside your apartment. You couldn’t even pretend to act surprised. They’d looked into your family’s background and tracked down the location of the funeral; it went without saying that they had an idea of where you lived too.

Well, not for much longer, by the sounds of it.

“Pack a few belongings, and then leave your keys with one of my men,” Ryu instructed. His dark eyes narrowed. “And don’t even think about trying to run away. You don’t want to find out what happens when you test my patience.”

You nodded briskly. Two of his subordinates followed you up to your apartment and waited as you grabbed some clothes, your laptop, and a few other valuables. You didn’t want to drag this out too long. Ryu had already hinted that he wasn’t a particularly patient guy.

Once you were finished and had everything packed up in two suitcases, you looked back over your shoulder. It was a small, cheap one-bedroom place, but you’d been living here for a while now. Leaving so suddenly just didn’t feel natural. Well, not that any part of this arrangement was natural to begin with.

One of the men extended his hand out. “Give me the keys,” he ordered. “We’ll make sure the lease is settled.”

“What are you going to do? My contract isn’t up yet.”

“None of your business. All you need to do is listen up and keep your mouth shut. If the boss says to do something, you do it.”

They didn’t seem to care much for your company. Then again, you hadn’t really expected for a group of yakuza to be all that friendly.

Keeping your gaze low to the ground, you stepped out of the apartment, dragging your luggage behind you. They loaded all your belongings into the trunk, and then you were back in the car again, right by Ryu’s side. Much to your immense dismay.

“All good?” he asked.

You nodded.

“What, are you mute all of a sudden? When I speak to you, you’d better answer properly.”

“Everything’s good,” you affirmed, swallowing uncomfortably. Ryu stared at you for a few moments before eventually scoffing in your face. You didn’t really know what he expected. Your mother had just recently died, and you were scared for your life. It was taking all your strength not to cry in front of these people again.

The drive took a while. You had no clue where you were heading, but it wouldn’t have made a difference anyways. Ryu’s lackeys had taken the liberty of confiscating your cell phone, so you couldn’t call for help even if you were willing to take the risk. Ironically, the most frustrating part in all of this was not that you were being taken against your will, but that your father’s words from all those years ago were playing in your mind on a loop.

“Those men are going to take care of us. Once I become a fully-fledged member, things will turn around.”

What a fucking joke. In the end, he couldn’t even commit to the group he’d chosen to abandon his own family for. He’d messed everything up and destroyed your life in the process. He wasn’t even around anymore, and he was still ruining things for you.

Your expression shifted into a scowl without you even realizing it. Beside you, Ryu let out an amused chuckle.

“There’s finally some life in your eyes,” he hummed. “You look upset, sweetheart. Are you upset with me?”

“No. Not with you.”

“Really?”

“You’re only taking care of business,” you reluctantly admitted. “I know it isn’t personal. It’s just about money. And I… don’t have any money to give you.”

His lips curled into a smile. “Who are you upset with, then?”

“My father. He was a terrible person back when I knew him, and it seems like that still hasn’t changed.”

“It looks like that’s something we can agree on. It’s good for you to have someone to direct your anger towards. Anger, resentment—those are all things that will make you stronger. But don’t direct those emotions towards me,” he warned. “Never towards me.”

You pressed your lips together. You hadn’t exactly been completely honest. You did resent him, but he was a criminal to begin with, so you couldn’t expect for him to do the sane, rational thing. It didn’t matter how you felt about him, anyways. He was the leader of a group of dangerous, violent individuals. You didn’t stand a chance against any of them.

The trip dragged on, to the point that you were starting to feel quite groggy. All of the adrenaline that had kept you going until now had just about run out. It was late in the night, and you were exhausted. You just wanted to lay down and sleep, wherever that may be.  

“We’re here,” Ryu finally said. “Get out of the car.”

You did as you were told. The area didn’t look too familiar, but you tried not to panic immediately. You were in front of a large, traditional-style home. It was possibly one of the biggest you’d ever seen.

“Are we still in Yokohama?” you asked.

“What did I say about asking questions?” one of the men snapped.

“Yes, we are,” Ryu mercifully answered. “It’s a ways off from your old apartment, but we haven’t left the city. Come on. Let’s go inside.”

You grabbed your suitcases out of the trunk and followed behind him. It would be your first time staying in a traditional home. Most of your friends had gone on vacation to seaside inns and hot springs, but you’d never had the money growing up to take any trips like that. If nothing else, you would at least get to see what you’d been missing out on. Disregarding the fact that you’d basically just been kidnapped.

It looked even bigger inside than on the outside, and you could already predict that you would be getting lost trying to navigate the long hallways and countless sliding doors.

“In here,” Ryu gestured, sliding one of the larger doors open. He looked back over his shoulder, addressing his subordinates. “Wait around for a while longer. I need to deal with her first.”

“Yes, sir.”

He patted you on the lower back and roughly pushed you inside the room. You yelped a bit, nearly tripping over your own feet. Ryu slid the door to a close behind him.

It was just the two of you now. Granted, the place was very big, but you didn’t much like the idea of being left alone with him. At least in front of the rest of his group, you could tell he was acting out the part of a leader. Now… there was something eerily sinister about his expression. You didn’t like it one bit.

“This will be your room,” he said. “Mine is right next to yours. There’s still some stuff I need to clean out, but it should be more than big enough. Any concerns?”

You shook your head. “No. You’re right, this is plenty of space for one person. Thank you.”

“Thank you?” he repeated, laughing a bit. “You’re thanking me? After I basically told you that you have no choice but to work for me in order to pay off a debt that isn’t even yours in the first place?”

“I just meant… thank you for giving me this room. It’s a nice room. I’ve never had such a big place all to myself before.”

“Hm. Well, it’s certainly easier than having you struggle and try to make things needlessly difficult. We still need to figure out how exactly you’ll be earning my money back, though.”

“I have two part-time jobs,” you perked up. “It’s not a lot, but once I pay off my loans, I should be able to send you my earnings.”

Ryu stared at you in disbelief. “Seriously? You think two measly jobs that a university student qualifies for are going to be anywhere near enough to cover your debt?”

“I-I’m not sure. How much did he steal?”

“You don’t want to know, doll. I can guarantee it’ll only freak you out even more.” He brought his hand to his chin, dark eyes scanning you over from top to bottom. “Well… come to think of it, you’re very cute. You have a pretty face, and your figure is also nice, from what I can see in that dress. I’m sure there are plenty of people out there who’d be willing to pay a nice sum to get better acquainted with your body.”

At first, you were dumbstruck, but the gravity of his words quickly set in.

You stared at him in horror. “Y-You want to pimp me out?”

“I’m considering it. Granted, it may be somewhat of a hassle given your lack of experience, but we could have someone show you the ropes. Get you settled in real nice.”

“No!” you cried out, easily the loudest you’d spoken since being kidnapped. You thought of your mother, who was still fresh in her grave. If she was watching over you from a better place right now, her poor heart would break to see you selling your body out. “Please,” you begged, dropping to your knees before him. “Anything but that. I’ll work as many jobs as you need—I’ll go without sleep, without rest. Just please… please don’t make me do that.”

Ryu stared down at you, eyes filled with mirth. “You can be really adorable at times, you know that? Look at you, already so docile and submissive. That’s a good selling point. The customers will like that.”

“Please,” you cried, “please don’t make me…”

“You seem to be forgetting something. It’s not for you to decide. From this moment onwards, I own your life. You can either do as I say, or I kill you.”

“I would rather die,” you told him defiantly. And you meant those words. You were no stranger to hard work, sleep deprivation, struggling not to buckle under all the stress. But this? You weren’t going to cling to your life only to live on in humiliation. You would rather go out with your dignity still intact.

Ryu gave you an unimpressed look. “You say that now, but that’s only because you haven’t looked death in the eyes yet. You don’t know the pain of torture, the fear of fading into nothingness. So, don’t get smart with me. Whatever you do, it’s my call, not yours.”

You dug your fingers into the fabric of your dress. You felt so small before him, so insignificant. Even more so when you were kneeling. It was true that you knew nothing of the world of the yakuza. But even as misinformed as you were, you weren’t completely ignorant. You saw full well the cruelty in Ryu’s black eyes. That wasn’t the look of a man—it was the look of a beast, a predator hunting for its next kill.

You were nothing to him. Absolutely nothing. He could kill you in a heartbeat and forget you’d ever existed the very next day.

“Relax,” he said, crouching down before you. He reached his hand out towards your head, and you involuntarily flinched, but held your ground. Ryu smiled coldly, running his fingers through your hair. “I still haven’t decided what I’m going to do. If you work hard, maybe you’ll change my mind. As long as you obey, I have no reason to hurt you.”

You were full-on glaring at him now, no longer trying to hide your animosity. He chuckled, clearly amused at your little show of defiance.

“Unpack your things and try to get some sleep. Tomorrow, I’ll show around our main office.”

He turned away from you, and you felt a small sense of relief knowing that he was finally about to leave you alone. He didn’t leave, though. At least, not right away. His eyes scanned the corner of the room before he reached over and withdrew what looked to be a yukata.

Without warning, he began changing out of his suit. Your eyes widened, and you hurried to avert your gaze. He probably didn’t even care. As far as he was concerned, you were just an object to him, not a real human being. Still, you waited for some sort of signal that he was done changing, but that signal never came.

Cautiously, you peered back over your shoulder, just in time to see him pulling the yukata up over his shoulders. His back was exposed for a few moments, long enough for you to make a very big, discernible tattoo. It was a dragon, in black and green ink, coiled around itself as if it were dancing through the air. Bright dashes of crimson stood out amidst the dark ink, snaking around the dragon’s body and burning as vividly as a flame.

Ryu tightened the belt of his yukata and stepped out of the room without another word.

The next morning, Ryu stayed true to his words and brought you along to the group’s offices.

As members of an organized crime syndicate, you’d always known that the yakuza didn’t really bother with hiding from the public. If anything, it was a thing of pride for them to display their organization’s identity on nameplates outside the buildings. They skirted on the wrong side of the law, but were able to get by through their connections and the sense of fear they instilled in the authorities.

Still, you were surprised to find out just how normal everything looked.

The offices were no different than what you would see in any ordinary corporate building. Dressed in their suits and working at desks, they almost gave off the air of your day-to-day salarymen. Of course, you knew better than that. You couldn’t say for certainty, but you had a strong feeling that the majority of the members had killed someone before.

Everyone bowed as they greeted Ryu. You had to admit that the respect he commandeered was impressive. He walked with a quiet, strong sense of confidence. You could tell by looking around the room. No one would ever think of opposing him.

Except for your shithead of a dad, apparently.

Ryu eventually stopped in front of a desk. “Here we are. Yuki. I’m putting you in charge of [Name] for now. Show her around the place and teach her how to file all the paperwork. And make sure she doesn’t get any funny ideas. I don’t need another headache to deal with.”

The young man he’d just addressed stood up in a hurry. “Of course, boss. I’ll take care of her.”

“Good. Get to work.”

Ryu walked away, heading to what appeared to be his own private office near the back. You were relieved to know that he wouldn’t be supervising you himself. It felt you could finally breathe again.

“You’re [Name], right?” the man said. He turned towards you and extended his hand out, smiling pleasantly. “I’m Yuki. Maeno Yuki. It’s nice to have you on board.”

He looked to be around your age, much more boyish than the majority of the members. He had wavy golden hair that was practically shining, and pretty emerald eyes. You knew first impressions could be deceiving, but for now, he was definitely much more welcoming than the scary, buff middle-aged men that were all glaring you down.

He looked normal. You liked normal.

You shook Yuki’s hand and forced a smile. “It’s nice to meet you. I’ll do my best to keep up.”

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[divinemare]

Hello!! I loved your fic Back to December (love the Taylor Swift reference) and it had me in tears. Is there any way you could write a Liam x reader where they meet on the day on the parapet and then become friends and it slowly turns into a friends to lovers situation? I love your writing and I can’t wait for more Fourth Wing fan fics <3

thank you so muuuuch! you’re so sweet, and thank u for your request!

sorry if this took so long, but I did my best so I hope you like it!

Snow On The Beach

FOURTH WING ONE SHOTS: Liam Mairi x reader

summary: well…need I to explain it? Snow On The Beach - Taylor Swift ft. More Lana Del Rey, duh

tw: none

“It’s gonna be ok, it’s gonna be ok, it’s gonna be ok…”

You repeated over and over again trying to calm the nerves in the erratic beats of your heart.

But was it? You were about to cross the parapet, the most fucking deranged way of welcoming students into their first year. Yet you had actively, willingly chose to be here, to do this.

“Why am I so impulsive,” you murmured under your breath, whining internally about the series of bad choices that had led you to this very moment in your life.

It had all begun with your awful, hating sisters making a passive-aggressive comment about how you couldn’t actually ever survive becoming a dragon rider, how you wouldn’t even survive crossing the parapet to begin with. They were two of the best healers with the best ranks, coming from a long family of the best healers; in the best ranks. All your family had ever done was try to brainwash you into becoming a healer, but you had never actually found the profession interesting at all, you had been obsessed with dragons since the day you learned to talk.

But you had just read about dragons, you had never actually seen one up close, only when they occasionally overflew your city, but that was it, that had been the closest you had ever gotten to a dragon in all your 20 years of life, how were you supposed to survive bonding one? Yeah, you had made a biiig mistake.

First it had been your sisters comments, then everything went downhill when your ego got bruised and offended, and that same day you sent your application to Basgiath for the Riders Quadrant.

An now you were here after your stupid, impulsive decision to shut your sisters mouths up, in the line of stupid people that were about to cross the stupid parapet.

“Hey,” someone touched your arm, but you were so focused in your prayer to the Gods you did not noticed the guy standing in front of you talking, so you jumped in surprise by his touch.

Good Gods, those were some deep blue eyes.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t meant to startle you,” his smile was just as beautiful as his eyes, and just as beautiful as his blond hair as well.

“No worries, I’m just in a perpetuate state of paranoia right now,” he laughed slightly, and you couldn’t help but smile at the deep rich sound.

“You dropped this,” he extended you something, and you looked down at his palm.

You couldn’t help but grimace at the awful necklace that stared right back at you. It had been a “gift”, supposedly.

“You can keep it, my big sister gave it to me, and I’m not entirely sure that she didn’t curse it to give me bad luck,” the guy lifted an amused eyebrow, and you sighed in defeat. “Forget it, I guess I will know if it’s cursed when I fall into my death hearing Malek’s and my diabolic sister’s laugh in my head,” but just as you were about to take the necklace from him, he snatched it back, and you stared up at him with a furrowed brow.

“Now, we don’t want that to happen, do we? I’ll keep it and clean the bad vibes off of it for you until you cross the parapet safe and sound,” he put in his pocket, and you couldn’t help but look at him with confusion and amusement at the same time.

“And how do you pretend to do that, exactly?”

“With my charming good vibes, of course,” you stared at him with an eyebrow raised for a second in total silence, but then inevitably laughed out laud.

You saw the guy’s smile lighting up as you tried to cover up your laugh with your hand, and you would be lying if you said that your heart didn’t jump at the sight of those white, beautiful teeth.

“Liam, by the way,” he extended his hand towards you again, this time with the purpose of introducing himself.

“That’s such a sweet name,” Liam arched an eyebrow with a pleased smile on his thin lips.

Had you actually said that out loud? Oh Gods. You felt your cheeks burning with embarrassment, you could only hope now that he didn’t notice it.

“Well thank you, and may I know your sweet name?” You extended your hand to him to go for a shake, and he immediately accepted it with his.

“Y/N.”

“Y/N,” he breathed when you both released each others hands, like tasting your name in his mouth.

“Next,” you both heard someone say behind Liam, and your gazes, that had been held on each other, finally turned towards the guy behind.

Liam’s face fell instantly pale, and you saw how he sucked in a breath for a split second.

You peaked over his shoulder, as he was impossibly tall, to see the guy standing in front of Liam, and you saw, hands down, the most intimidating man you had ever seen in your life.

In the most arousing way, for some strange reason.

The guy’s face flinched just a split second as well, and you didn’t got to read the looks in their eyes before Liam gave his full name to the man and rushed away, looking back at you and winking an eye before stepping into the parapet.

The weather outside had to be fucked up today, seems like your sister had done a really good job cursing that necklace.

“Name?” The intimidatingly hot guy asked, and you took your eyes away from the blond hair of Liam to set it on the guy’s onyx eyes.

Your eyes couldn’t help but drift to the tattoo peaking out of his shirt.

“Last chance to take a step back,” the dark-haired guy, the Marked One, said.

Through your mind crossed every passive aggressive word your sisters had said, the look of disappointment in your parents eyes when you told them you would not become a Healer. And then, before you could stop your mouth or think outside your pride:

“Y/N Y/L,” you replied, sucking in a breath.

The guy nodded slightly, and the other guy beside him wrote your name on the list he was trying to protect from the rain.

“Good luck,” you saw sincerity in his harsh onyx eyes, and with one last nervous, but thankful smile, you turned around from him.

You took a deep breath, braced yourself, and stepped onto the parapet.

…

You were so close, so so close, you could already see the end of the parapet, feel it, yet the wind was making those last steps harder than the whole way.

Liam’s blonde, wet hair was the first thing you noticed, then his encouraging smile, and then his hopeful eyes.

He stood near the entrance, as if…as if waiting for you.

When you arched your brows slightly, and he deepened his smile, you confirmed it; he was waiting for you.

“You did it, seems no curse is strong enough to stop you,” when you finally stepped into safety, his words were the first thing that greeted you.

With the inicial panic, and overall fear of the parapet finally over, after you gave your name to the girl with the beautiful red hair, you were able to take him in completely. And Holy Gods, your mouth went instantly dry at how gorgeous that man was.

His intense blue eyes, his white sideways smile, his ruffled and wet blond hair, his wide, big shoulders and muscular arms, his height…Gods he was tall. And…and that rebellion relic. You hadn’t seen it before, hadn’t noticed it at the beginning of his wrist and disappearing under his sleeve.

He noticed your eyes lingering on it, and his cocky demeanor immediately changed into an uncomfortable one. You hadn’t meant to make him uncomfortable, it’s just that you had never interacted this much with Marked One, your parents had always told you Marked Ones were awful people, rude and brutal and violent and dangerous. But this guy had been the opposite to all those words they had used to describe him. It didn’t surprise you tho, that your parents had only been full of venom and no truth at all.

Then you started laughing, out of the blue. You just laughed out laud, making everyone around you turn to look at you as if you had grown another head. You may as well have, for how insane you were looking right now.

“I’m sorry,” you tried to say over your laughter. “I’m sorry, I just…I…” But you couldn’t stop laughing.

Liam raised an eyebrow in utter bafflement, but his lips slightly twitched upwards in amusement when you couldn’t help but put a hand on his chest to support your shaking body.

He laughed slightly with you then, your laughter being contagious, and both of you laughed with everyone around you starting to worry you had already lost your marbles.

“I’m sorry, it’s just…oh, my mother is going to have a heart attack,” you laughed, tears already streaming down your face. “And my sisters, good Gods, my sisters are gonna choke in their gasps!”

“Are you ok?” Liam asked with amusement, raising a blond eyebrow.

“I did it!” You beamed.

“You did,” he nodded.

“I did!”

You had survived the parapet, you had actually survived. And it felt so damned good.

“Here, I cleaned the bad vibes for you,” Liam took out your sister’s necklace and gave it to you.

You thanked him, and sighed while looking at the horrible thing.

“At least we’ll know how to recognize your body with this,” those had been your sister’s words, accompanied with faked sorrow and a quick hug.

You looked at Liam with a smile, and then turned around, walking again towards the edge of the end of the parapet and tossed the damned thing out.

“It can rot in hell, for all I care,” you said going back to Liam’s side, and sighing with deep relief.

Liam laughed, and you both made your way to where cadets were being gathered now.

Your new life started right here and right now, and you couldn’t have been more grateful than to start it with a mischievously handsome new friend.

…

“Ouch!” you complained as the healer cleaned your bloodied lip.

“Sorry,” the tiny guy apologized, and you sighed as he continued to clean one of your many wounds.

The mat had been brutal today, probably the most brutal you’ve had so far. Ivana Harlow was a ruthless, massively tall girl who had already killed two of her opponents on the mat, and today, she had almost kicked your ass back to your mother’s womb as well. Luckily for you, Liam had taught you just the right way to break someone’s leg, and even tho every inch of your body was in pain right now, at least your pride was intact.

“Where is she? Is she ok? Can you please let me see her?” A voice you had grown to know so well spoke behind the closed door of the treating room.

You tried to stand from the stretcher, but your body instantly protested in waves of intense pain that made you moan.

“Told you to stay still,” the healer warned you, and you huffed and ok.

The door flew open seconds later, and an extremely concerned looking Liam entered with panted breaths.

“Are you ok?” He sighed in partial relief when he saw you awake, and you tried to smile without a grimace to calm his worries down.

“I’m fine.”

“She’s not,” the healer answered, and you shot him a look that he ignored.

“She’s not?” Liam’s worry came back in a second.

“I am,” you said again, but he was now not paying attention to you but to the healer.

“She has a broken rib.”

“Nothing a mender can’t fix,” you tried to say to calm Liam a little, but his face had already gone pale.

“And a broken ankle.”

“Again, a mender.”

“And her stomach was one punch away from bleeding out internally.”

“But it did not happen!”

“And-”

“And can you stop? Before he passes out,” you signaled Liam with your head, who looked so pale you started to worry he may replace you in this stretcher.

“I’ll leave you two,” the healer said, disposing of the bloodied cotton with which he had been cleaning the blood off your lip. “Don’t try to stand up,” he warned you with an accusatory finger, and you only nodded and murmured your thanks.

When it was only you and Liam in the treating room, you smiled at him.

“I’m fine, I am,” he sighed and rubbed his eyes, approaching you with a frown of worry in his beautiful face.

“When Ridoc went to look for me and told me Ivana had left you passed out I ran here. I should’ve been there, I’m sorry,” you shook your head and went to grab his hands with yours.

“You had other things to do, besides, Ridoc’s an overly dramatic idiot, I didn’t pass out. Besides, you would’ve been proud, I broke that bitch’s leg after she broke my rib,” Liam finally laughed slightly, and you smiled at the sound.

“I am proud,” your smile turned into a slight blush, and he let go of one of your hands to take it to your cheek and softly, being extra careful not to touch the red spots that were already turning purple, rubbed sweet circles in it.

“Thank you, for what you taught me,” you said to fill that beating gap in your chest that was making it really hard to breath.

You’ve been lately feeling that way around Liam, specially since he’d been changed to the Flame Section, and you’ve stopped seeing each other as much since then. But every chance he got, he looked for you, and you were grateful he hadn’t yet forgotten about you.

But now every time you got together was even more special than the last one, every training session or glance across the dinning room or time together during class. It hadn’t been until you stoped having him next to you every time that you started noticing the effects of his absence. You missed him more than you thought you would, and you realized you probably liked him more than you thought you did.

It was complicated, he was your friend, and there were yet a lot of things he hid from you, you knew for the way he stoped himself while speaking sometimes or avoided certain topics.

“You don’t have to thank me, Y/N, you know I would do anything to…” Again, as he now usually did, he stoped himself.

“To what?”

He didn’t answer, only stared into your eyes with his deep blue ones. Every time he looked at you, you felt like you could drown in his ocean eyes and you wouldn’t mind one bit. But you couldn’t explain that, because he was your friend, and nothing else. Or at least he had never hinted he would be up to being something else at all, and you’d seen him flirt, a lot.

“Liam, to what?” You insisted a little more, and when he lowered his head, you released his hand and moved your head away from his other hand.

“To keep you safe, Y/N, I would to anything to keep you safe.”

You stared at him with an open mouth, not knowing exactly what to say, or think of his words. He looked so unlike him with his serious expression and tormented gaze, you couldn’t help but to grab his hand and squeeze it.

“I know,” you murmured in a low, much rasp voice you thought you had at the moment.

“You scared the shit out of me,” he got closer to you, drawing circles in the back of your hand with his thumb, and making your heart stupidly speed up.

“I know, I’m sorry,” he wasn’t looking up from your hands, but he got slowly closer to you until your legs instinctively parted to let him get between them.

“She could’ve killed you, she has already killed opponents,” his other hand went to cup your cheek again, and you felt how the air got trapped on your throat as his intense blue eyes met yours.

“But she didn’t.”

“You broke her leg,” he stroke your cheek delicately, and you couldn’t help but to close your eyes and lean into his sweet touch.

“I did,” you confirmed with a devilish grin, and Liam let out a shaky breath, like he was too having trouble breathing this close to you.

“Gods, Y/N, I can’t believe you’re doing this to me.”

You arched your eyebrows in confusion and pursed your lips, unable to think with clarity at all.

“What? What am I doing now?”

Then Liam backed away from you, so far that you couldn’t reach him now. Suddenly you felt too cold, too unprotected of the harsh breeze that went between you two. You were absolutely confused and out of words, his eyes now didn’t let out a single feeling for you to try to read, and before you could get words out of your already opened mouth, he spoke.

“Get some rest, the mender should be here in no time,” and just like that, he was gone.

What the actual fuck. You asked yourself as you stared at the door with an astonished expression, and a disappointed, turned-down heart.

…

You were fine now, after a week of rest, the pain had completely disappeared, and your energy was back at the top as you excitedly tied the laces of your riding boots, getting ready to finally be able to go on a ride without the ultimate danger of your pain making it way too difficult to hold on. It had been Luainthr, your dragon, who suggested you didn’t step a foot on one of his scales before you fully recover. He had been worried for you, even if he wouldn’t straightforwardly say it.

The door of your bedroom sounded with three simple knocks, and so you strapped your last dagger on your boot before you stood up from your bed and walked towards the door.

Once open, Liam’s tall frame and beautiful eyes looked down to yours, and you abstained yourself from frowning as he took a deep, nervous breath.

You hadn’t seen him since that day in the treating room, when he had you left so abruptly with a knot on your heart and head.

“Liam, what-”

“I made you this,” he didn’t even let you finish speaking when he handed you a little wood-carved necklace.

You almost gasped at the beauty of the hand made magnolia.

Your favorite flower.

“Liam, this is…” You looked up at him with stars of gratitude shining in your eyes, making him smile as well. “Beautiful, absolutely beautiful. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. To replace the cursed one, I guess,” you couldn’t help but laugh while putting on the beautiful necklace.

Magnolias symbolized endurance and perseverance, both things you had clung onto so tightly since you got here. In one of your late night talks, you had told Liam about your love for magnolias, you hadn’t thought, tho, that he remembered up till now.

“Liam…” You said with a sigh, watching as his shoulders were tense and he sucked in a breath, there was something bothering him, you saw how his blue eyes mimicked a relentless ocean and knew immediately something was up with him. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m sorry,” he said with a sigh, finally getting something he apparently really needed out of his chest. “For how I left the other day, and for not coming to visit you. I’m sorry, Y/N.”

“Why did you leave like that?” He looked away from you, only giving you more reasons to be curious. “Liam, what is it?”

“Because…” He blurted out, seeming to struggle with his words.

Watching Liam flustered like this was something you had never expected to see. He was overly confident, cocky. He flirted his way out and in of everything. He was the best cadet in your year, the best fighter, simply; the best. But here he was, at your door, all flustered and appearing to be a wreck of nerves.

“Because I had to leave you,” there was a certain pain in his eyes that made you feel a crush in your own heart.

“Why?” Your voice was more of a whisper than you anticipated.

“Because I didn’t wanted to kiss you when you were like that, and I desperately wanted to.”

The words struck late in your head, and your eyes widened as they finally did.

You saw it then, how he so desperately wanted to kiss you now too, but you hadn’t said it yet. That you wanted it just as bad.

So you grabbed him by the collar of his jacket and dragged him inside your room, closing your door with your boot before you pushed your lips to his.

His hands wrapped around your waist immediately as yours grabbed both sides of his face. And the most wild, desperate kiss you had ever given took all the rational thoughts completely out of your head.

“Fucking hell, Y/N,” he moaned in a rasp voice when you both needed some desperate air, nipping your lower lip and making you moan as well.

“Took you long enough,” your voice was just as shaky and out breath when you spoke.

Liam smiled in your mouth, and kissed you deeply again, once, twice, grabbing the back of your neck and tilting your head up, stroking gently but somewhat so possessively your jaw.

“It sure as hell did,” his low voice sent a shiver down your entire body, the sound reverberating in yours, causing heat to rush from the top of your head to the tips of your toes, curling them up, and building an insufferable pulse between your legs.

And he made sure to make up for all that time after that, bringing you to the depths of a pleasure you never thought possible before you had him worshiping every inch of your body.

[ladywindmasterr]

Jiang Cheng did his best to not press his fingertips together, something he did when he was nervous but had to avoid in order to appear more serious, especially at that moment, when he was discussing something important.

“That's why I came to see you, Daozhang. I don't know why this is happening to me, but I hope that you know what is happening to my core…” The he sect leader said, looking at Xiao XingChen's blind and covered eyes. As if he was going to realize...

"It has come to my knowledge that you are-... that you were the shidi of Wei WuXian, my martial nephew. Please, you don't have to act so polite with me" Xiao XingChen smiled, in an attempt to lighten the mood.

Jiang Cheng closed his eyes momentarily when the cultivator mentioned his brother-… Wei WuXian. An indescribable feeling flooded his chest, and he couldn't exactly determine if it was negative or positive.

It had been two years since his death, but Jiang Cheng could see his blood-smeared body disappear over the edge of the cliff every time he closed his eyes. With clarity. Especially his expression.

No.

“As you wish, Daozhang. So, do you have any ideas?"

XingChen only moved his face so that his eyes were facing the ground.

“I don't know, Sect Leader. Those symptoms could mean many things… There really are many possibilities,” the cultivator wandered aloud.

Jiang Cheng's brow furrowed .

"Many possibilities"

...So there was for sure at least one with a bad ending.

"But since you've come to see me specifically, I think you have an idea of what could be happening. Am I wrong?" Xiao XingChen carried on.

He, in fact, wasn't wrong.

Jiang Cheng had been searching, relentlessly searching every library he could set foot on. Although he had found several possibilities, there was one that, although it did not seem very likely, was the most accurate due to his symptoms.

“Daozhang, I think it has something to do with the legacy of Baoshan Sanren's students. I came looking for you because you are one of the few that are still out there, and also are quite famous in the cultivation world for it.

Xiao XingChen nodded gravely.

"I supposed. Everything you've told me... The energy full episodes, the burning feeling inside you, the crashes that follow... Sounds very similar ike what I had to endure"

"I have a question, Daozhang" Jiang Cheng couldn't contain his doubt "It's just that I've never been a student of Baoshan Sanren nor am I a descendant of any.

Xiao XingChen seemed curious about it, which was good for Jiang Cheng. If he was curious, he would help him sort it all out.

"Well, Sect Leader, it is not necessary to study with the Master or descend from someone who has done it... There are cases, very rare, in which she manipulated a Core that later had that reaction. Had your ever...?"

The question was hanging in the air. Had he ever been injured so badly that he had been taken to none other than Baoshan Sanren?

“During the Sunshot Campaign…” Jiang Cheng began. It was going to be complicated. He sighed

"You may have heard about the annihilation of my clan in the hands of the Wen. They kidnapped me, and in an attempt to extract information, they ripped my Core out."

"Oh"

Even with the top of his face covered, surprise was visible on Xiao XingChen's face.

"Wei WuXian took me to see Baoshan Sanren. We pretended that I was him and asked her to restore my core. It went well, so that's probably it."

Jiang Cheng relaxed as he connected all the dots. He finally knew where it all came from, apart from the fact that if Xiao XingChen, who had also suffered from it, was in front of him, it meant that he would not die or anything worse

However, the aforementioned did not seem to be very sure about anything. Instead, he seemed even more curious.

"Are you completely sure that the one who helped you was my Master? I don't mean to call you a liar, but..."

The tranquility that had been in Jiang Cheng's mind was gone as quickly as it had appeared.

"But?" He allowed himself to get a little impatient.

Xiao XingChen moved his head to the side.

"Well, I think Baoshan Sanren is not capable of doing that."

Jiang Cheng's impatience turned into disbelief.

"What?"

"That's right, Sect Leader. I'm sorry, but my master is not capable of such a feat. What's more, she is incapable of even doing slightly easier things. For example, when I asked her to heal my dear Song Lan's eyes, she couldn't. She could only exchange my... Oh."

Xiao XingChen suddenly went completely still. He pursed his lips, as if trying not to say something. That only angered Jiang Cheng, who just wanted to hear about his strange condition.

"What's happening?"

Xiao XingChen did not reply.

"Daozhang?"

Nothing.

Jiang Cheng could feel his frown growing more pronounced

“Xiao XingChen!” he yelled, forgetting all etiquette. The rising anxiety in his chest was about to burst.

"Jiang Wanyin, are you in a headspace where I could give you information that could possibly hurt you?"

'What kind of question is that?'

The change from formal title to courtesy name had not gone unnoticed by Jiang Cheng, who could only imagine the severity of the situation or the circumstances that had provoked such a change.

"Right now, the only thing I want is to know what is happening to me. If I have to get a bit scared to achieve it, then so be it."

Xiao XingChen sighed. He didn't seem to know how to put whatever thoughts he was having into words.

"Just to make sure, before saying anything to you, could you let me touch your wrist for a moment?"

Jiang Cheng was even more confused.

"Of course?" The sect leader stretched out his arm, wrist up, in the direction of the cultivator.

Xiao XingChen just grabbed it without another word and spent a few seconds with his fingers sliding over his wrist.

He withdrew them, an indescribable expression on his face.

"Sect Leader, are you completely sure that it was Baoshan Sanren that you saw?“

"What's the point of asking that question again!?”

Jiang Cheng had already totally lost his patience, and his fists were clenched tightly. Xiao XingChen seemed not to want to mince words.

"I'm not asking just because I want to. From what I can feel... Jiang Cheng, the golden core inside you is that of your brother's"

Jiang Cheng was about to respond with the "I don't have a brother" he was used to when he realized.

Wei Wuxian.

...

No. There was no way.

Jiang Cheng herad himself muttering a weak "What?" to the man in front of him, who only repeated what he had previously stated.

"You have Wei WuXian's golden core"

Jiang Cheng looked at him, with a shadow in his eyes and his whole body shaking.

"It's a lie. It's a lie. It's a lie. No one can rip out a golden core and stuff it inside another person. There were no doctors with Wei Wuxian, it couldn't have happened, without any…"

A female face framed by soft dark hair and a Wen robe appeared in his mind.

Wen Qing.

No. No. No. It isn't true. Everything is a lie. You are making it up.

Wei WuXian wouldn't have done that, never. He was so proud of his cultivation. There was no way, he wouldn't have been able to use suibian!

Another image appeared in his mind. Wei WuXian, in his last months of life.

With not even a sword scabbard dangling at his hip.

Jiang Cheng heard himself scream, and felt his trembling hands cover his wet eyes.

He felt someone touching his shoulder and speaking to him, but he paid no attention.

He only thought of everything that Wei WuXian had sacrificed for him.

Everything that his brother had sacrificed for him.

And now it was gone. He didn't have his brother, his sister, not even the peacock or his parents. Only a baby nephew that would grow without parents.

He was alone.

SO. UM. YEAH.

Credit for this amazing idea goes to @mikkeneko

I'm so glad I was able to write this!! Even thought it's a bit ooc mainly because I've never written any mzds fics or anything lol.

Also, keep in mind english isn't my first language and excuse any weird grammar/spelling

[koumeowkami]

🪐 no celestial ; kanallen

— chapter seven

"Kanata was a poor little angel that heaven couldn't help. He'd always been a tough one, not trusting anyone but his little brother Nayuta, the only person that ever made him feel love. Growing up by themselves, he did everything in his power to protect his sick brother, things that dirtied his holy hands. "It's for a good cause though", he thought. But it wasn't enough, and Nayuta died soon after.

Kanata's soul was completely spent. He became unable to feel love, and adding to his dirty dealings that soon were found out, he got cast out of heaven. Fallen on Earth with his wings blackened, he felt so lost and empty he thought he could've just died.

But a random encounter with a very annoying, persistent, stupid redhead human boy would've made him discover love again."

2889 words

genre: supernatural, hurt/comfort, angst

warnings: none

previous ✧ next

Allen stood there, his jaw dropped. Before them, the smoke slowly dissipated, revealing two figures, both with black horns, bat wings and a pointed tail.

Demons.

The boy felt lightheaded for a moment, trying to take everything in. If angels were real, of course demons were as well. But when he looked over to where Kanata was standing, the other looked pretty much at ease, his face impassible. Weren't they supposed to be enemies? Why did the angel know them already and even looked close?

"Hey there, Kanata! Ya seem to be makin' human friends!" one of the demons, who wore traditional clothing and was adorned in a bunch of golden accessories, teased him as if he was talking to an old friend of his. He strode across the room, the sound of his geta echoing, followed by his muscular companion. He stopped right in front of Kanata. The white haired boy's expression shifted to a visibly annoyed one, arms crossed, muttering a small "we ain't friends" that only made the man grin.

"Ah excuse me kiddo... we haven't introduced ourselves yet" he turned to Allen with a smile, "I'm Iori Suiseki 'n I lead one of the demonic clans in Hell. This buff guy behind me is Zen" he pointed to the tall man, who despite the huge appearance had soft eyes.

"Kanata-kun!! You look like you've gotten a lot better, I'm glad!" Zen walked straight to the angel's face, being all cheerful with him.

"Don't be so close... ugh, you're so damn noisy" Kanata grimaced, taking a step behind, "Ignore 'em, Suzaku. So, why are you here?"

"Everybody in Hell and Heaven heard all that noise ya made earlier, y'know?"

Iori turned back to Kanata, looking at him straight in the eye. His face was unreadable, but Allen could feel that there was something more implied behind those words. The well masked worry of the man made Allen listen intently, being himself on edge after seeing what happened to the angel.

Kanata just tsked, his eyes empty.

"So what? I don't remember y'all being my caregivers or somethin' like that. There's nothin' else we need to tell each other anymore."

Anymore? Allen wondered if something else had happened prior to Kanata falling. Why did he have business with demons? Was that the reason why he fell? He wanted to know more of him so badly, but he knew having to wait for the boy to say something was probably for the best.

"Aw, why are ya bein' so detached with us, now? Is the fact we wanna help you a bit that bad?" The demon said over-dramatically, pretending to sob, "Ya see, you and us... we ain't that different."

Zen got once again close to Iori, whispering in his ear if that was "the right moment to tell him" ; the man just looked at him back. Thankfully, Kanata didn't hear that, but nonetheless his patience started wearing thin by each second that passed.

"... Are you tryna hide somethin' from me, Suiseki-san?" the boy spat, looking into him. No matter how polite he had to be with that man, he couldn't hide the urgency in his tone.

"Not at all. I'm here to tell ya everythin' you gotta know, in fact."

"Hah?"

"Kanata, you don't know who your father is, am I right?"

"I don't... but what has that to do with–"

"I always gotta keep track of the people who work for me, so I made sure to do some research on ya..." Iori interrupted Kanata, still smiling even though his eyes weren't, "I always knew ya were a special kid, y'know?"

"... What does this mean?!" Kanata's eyes started to waver, as he couldn't bear to look at the man in the eyes anymore. His gaze shifted, and Allen felt the angel's eyes on him for a second, probably in search of something that could calm him down.

"Kanata, you and your brother were born from an angel... and a demon."

Half angel, half demon. Kanata looked down, his heart hammering in his chest. Suddenly everything made sense: Nayuta and him receiving the snake earrings when they were children, them being isolated from the other angels because they were scared of the twins' aura, their shitty mother wanting to get rid of them and calling them a mistake... all of it was because of their father. He felt dizzy.

"This... this can't be..." he uttered in a shaky tone, keeping his head low.

"Oh really? I'm sure you've always believed it, deeply in your heart."

Tsk. That damn demon was right. The beauty of temptation had been plaguing his mind since long ago, staining his heart more and more. The purity of angels had always been a dream to him. When he looked at Suiseki again, he understood the similarity: his gelid gaze was as wild as the demons' fiery one, no room for innocence.

"Now, your angel-demon nature makes things hard for ya." the demon started, his expression serious but soft, "You've fallen, so your demonic powers are finally surfacin'..."

"My... demonic powers?"

"That's right. You've always had them, but your angel side made sure to suppress them..." Muscles intervened, worry evident in his tone, "Now that you're a fallen angel, they're coming back to you in an enhanced form."

"So... that outburst of energy that happened earlier was..."

"Demonic power takin' over ya, yeah. If ya don't learn to keep your feelings at bay and control it... you might cause a real mess."

"And at that point, guards will bring you to Hell."

Head in hands, Kanata tried to digest all the things the demons were telling him. Hell, he didn't even know he had powers, let alone destructive ones. Although he didn't mind being associated with that other reality, as he felt close to it more than he had ever felt with Heaven's side, he didn't want to go to Hell, nor he wanted to harm anyone. No more of that. He had already caused so much pain in the past. His initial thoughts about dying were surfacing again, thinking that maybe he really did deserve to disappear, after all. All of this happening to him was only further proof of the curse he was bearing.

"I'm not gonna let that happen to you!!"

Kanata and the demons turned to the redhead, who hadn't said anything until that very moment. The boy looked as devastated as someone who had received the news of a parent passing away, and Kanata's heart hurt at that sight. Oh, how much he hated to be pitied. Angry tears prickled his eyes, but he managed to fight them for now.

"Oh boy, your human friend looks like he doesn't want ya to go at all~" Suiseki was teasing him again, trying to lighten up the mood a bit.

The other boy immediately panicked, having spoken out of place accidentally, "Uh... I'm sorry to interrupt you. But yes, I... I wouldn't want anything to happen to him, ever." he composed himself again, speaking firmly.

"God... shut up." Kanata murmured in a pout, but apparently everyone else still heard him, considering how amused Suiseki looked. The demon hummed happily, enjoying Kanata's slightly distressed expression.

What was so funny about it?

Suiseki turned to Suzaku again and got closer, putting a hand on the boy's shoulder, "I'll make sure nothin' ever happens to him." he reassured the redhead.

"... Hah? Wouldn't I be more useful to you if I were in Hell?"

"Ya ain't wrong, but I know it's not what ya want. You've suffered enough."

While Kanata furrowed his brows in confusion, asking himself what he did to receive such kindness from a stupid demon, Suiseki snapped his fingers, summoning three other figures: one was tall, with curly green hair and kind eyes; another one had orange hair and the demeanor of a little delinquent; the shortest one had pink hair and looked particularly annoying. They all wore tattoos and golden jewelry that stood out in contrast to the dark appearance of demons, exactly like Suiseki. Kanata thought they were also part of his clan, even though he never saw them back when he used to do jobs for the demon.

"Here they are! Hokusai, Satsuki and Reo are gonna watch over ya and teach ya a thing or two on how to control your powers." the leader proudly pointed at each one of them in the order in which they appeared.

"Ugh, that's booooring~ I don't like staying here on Earth!" the pink haired boy, Reo, whined so loudly he immediately got on Kanata's nerves. No one seemed to mind his tantrum though, being probably used to it.

"Shaddup, you brat! We gotta follow Aniki's orders!" the orange bastard, Satsuki, started arguing with the pink gremlin going on a rampage about values and helping people in need, the other guy seemingly uninterested in it. Again, no one questioned their behavior.

"Stop fighting... helping this boy is important, remember?" the gentle giant, Hokusai, spoke in a voice so low it was barely audible, and yet his tender smile was enough to make his younger companions stop. Kanata even doubted that could be classified as an "evil being".

The redhead, who had been standing close to Kanata the whole time, turned to him. "Are these... really demons?" he asked, confusion laced in his voice.

"Considerin' how noisy they are... yeah." the angel facepalmed at the chaotic sight in front of him, not sure if that was really a gift from Suiseki, or only something that could've made him go insane sooner. Suzaku giggled at that response.

"Oi! We're here for ya, y'know? You could be a bit more grateful!!" Satsuki stomped towards them, pointing at Kanata with his best intimidating expression. Kanata wasn't impressed.

"I don't need any of y'all annoyin' ass demons." he replied flatly, distancing himself from the orange haired guy. He could hear the other's overly exaggerated "HAAAH?!" behind him but he ignored it.

"Come on, Kanata-kun... I promise they'll get better." Muscles readily reassured him, noticing how frustrated the angel looked, being surrounded by so many people all at once. Suiseki joined in the conversation too, wrapping his arm around Kanata's shoulder. "I'm sure all of you guys will become friends in no time!" he flashed the boy a smile, even though the latter wasn't really sure about it, nor he was enthusiastic about spending time with them. If anything, the mere thought of it gave him a headache.

"I'm counting on ya, alright?" the demon turned to his little brothers, who gave a firm nod.

"Yeah, Aniki! Leave it to us!"

And with that, Suiseki and Muscles disappeared in a black smoke.

The demon trio approached the other boys again, their aura incredibly strong. They looked friendly, too friendly for Kanata's taste. Was he only able to attract annoying people he wanted nothing to do with?

"Mm... we're also going, now." Gentle Giant spoke first, smiling kindly at him and Suzaku, "We live not too far from here."

Orange Bastard got again too close for comfort, a confident smirk on his face. "Yeah! Just call us whenever ya need help and we'll rush to ya!"

"I said I don't– ...whatever." Kanata sighed in defeat, making the redhead giggle silently once more. This time though, the angel turned to him with threatening eyes, his cue for the other guy to quit laughing, or else.

The last one to speak was Pink Gremlin, waving his hand, "We'll talk a lot more next time! See you~"

The room fell silent after their disappearance. Kanata finally breathed out as tension left his body, so damn exhausted after all he went through in just a day. He felt weird about that entire situation, about Suzaku standing up for him despite having learned how dangerous he was, how much of a monster was. Glancing at the boy, he looked as shaken as Kanata was, but his eyes were shining with determination. He was really not going to give up anytime soon, huh.

"I'm gonna lay down for a bit. My head hurts." he simply said emotionlessly. The redhead looked at him, eyes softening sympathetically.

"I'm gonna heat some food up so we can eat later, okay?"

The boy was met with no reply as Kanata just disappeared in his room. Sinking in the messy red sheets, he closed his eyes and tried to rest, but his thoughts just couldn't leave him alone for not even a moment. He thought about his conversation with Suiseki, how he helped him without asking for a repayment, how he even sent his own little brothers to help the poor angel in distress. Being cared for, unconditionally... it was something Kanata had experienced only with Nayuta, his one and only family. No protection ever received from the woman he could hardly call a "mother"; if anything, she was the very person who had thrown them to the snakes.

His mind wandered again, remembering Suiseki calling him and Suzaku "friends". Was that how they really looked like? He thought it was pretty much clear that he couldn't stand the redhead's ass, although... maybe something between them was a bit different now, as if some chemical effect was slowly taking place. Heat rose up to his cheeks, as he grumbled to himself while hugging his pillow in a pout.

Dinner time came and went, still no trace of Pink Hair and Mushroom-head returning. The two boys sat on their bed, their backs pressed against the headboard, enjoying for once a comfortable silence.

It didn't last long, as the angel felt the boy beside him shifting a little bit so he could look at him.

"Kanata... are you okay?"

Kanata hummed, hugging his knees. It was time. He couldn't keep this secret, this burden in his heart any longer. He then took a deep breath, turning to the redhead.

"... You've heard it from Suiseki-san, right? That I used to have a twin brother called Nayuta."

"Used to...?"

"He was sick and died some time ago."

The other shivered visibly, looking down. The angel saw him listening intently, not uttering a single word. He continued.

"It's my fault, all of it. It's cause I'm an abomination. I was a horrible brother, a horrible son... and I couldn't even keep my promise to find a cure for him, despite working hard for Suiseki-san."

Kanata dug his nails into the uncovered flesh of his legs, leaving slight marks behind. Suzaku rushed to stop him from hurting himself any longer, grabbing his wrists. Their hands touched for a mere second, the redhead's slender fingers wrapping around the angel's calloused ones.

"You're not an abomination." the guy started, his eyes wavering, "I'm sure you did your best for your brother... he's proud of you."

Kanata laughed bitterly, staring at his feet as he shook his head, speaking more and more frantically.

"That's bullshit. It wasn't enough. I should've worked harder for him... I should've been a good boy like him... I should've died, after all–"

"Stop! Stop saying that!"

The redhead yelled and hugged him, on the verge of tears. He sobbed quietly, hiding his face in the crook of the angel's neck. The latter was completely taken off guard, stilling in the other boy's embrace. He's never been this close to another human being before and he didn't know what to do, but he felt oddly comfortable: his body immediately reacted, warmth spreading everywhere.

"... W-why are you cryin' for me?" Kanata stuttered, trying his best to not sound affected by the weird feeling in his stomach, "I'm a monster. There's somethin' inside of me that is deadly... why don't you get I could kill ya?"

Suzaku sniffled like a kid, raising his head so he could look at the angel in the eyes, "You won't, I'm sure of it. Look, you're worrying about me now..."

"I'm not– ugh, nevermind... get yourself off of me right now."

Kanata pushed against Suzaku's chest a bit as the latter broke the hug, wiping some tears that had spilled away, blushing just slightly. The white haired boy gave him an impassibile look.

"Look at ya, cryin' like a baby... you're pathetic."

"You're also crying, though..."

The redhead pointed at Kanata's face, a single tear falling down. His eyes widened when he felt his hand slightly wet after touching his own cheek. His emotions were all over the place now, spilling out more and more as the other guy kept on breaking the cage that contained his heart. That was the first time he was letting himself be vulnerable.

After the guy went back to his side of the bed, he gave one last glance to the angel, looking dead serious. "Kanata... I'm not going anywhere."

"Mm?"

"I won't leave you alone, no matter what. I'll do my best to make you happy."

"Shut up, I'm gonna vomit."

Kanata immediately laid down to sleep, hiding his face from the redhead, who was laughing softly. What the hell was wrong with him, saying that sorta cheesy stuff out of the blue? As he kept mentally cursing the other guy, he didn't realize he was blushing again, feeling once more that something in his stomach that was both weird and incredibly pleasing.

It felt so good, he wanted to drown in it.

[storyofmychoices]

Between Coffee & Cases: an unexpected day

[Trystan Thorne x Lilah Rose Masterlist]

Pairing: M! Trystan Thorne x Lilah Rose (F!MC) Book: Crimes of Passion II Word Count: ~800 Rating/Warning: General (no warnings)

Synopsis: Lilah is pouring over the clues they've uncovered, looking for the missing piece, when Trystan surprises her with a special offer.

Lilah's suite had become a whirlwind of organized chaos, strewn with case files and crime scene photographs. Her mind was fully absorbed in the intricacies of the two murder cases in Drakovia that had been overwhelming her life for far too long.

A soft knock on the door disrupted her concentration. She glanced up to see Trystan standing there, a warm smile on his lips. "Hi."

Lilah's eyebrows knitted together. She hadn't expected to see him. Despite herself, she suppressed her smile. "What brings you here, Your Highness? I thought you were needed for Kingly duties tonight."

"This is where I'm supposed to be." He reassured her, stepping into the room and closing the door behind him. He held out a large steaming cup of coffee. "I thought you could use some fuel to keep you going."

A sarcastic smile pulled on her lips. "Thanks, I hadn't noticed the dark circles forming under my eyes after staring at these files for hours."

"You make a very beautiful raccoon," he teased. Trystan handed her the cup, his gaze lingering on her with a mix of admiration and affection. 

Lilah accepted his offering. She settled back onto the floor amid her scattered materials, taking a grateful sip of the coffee. 

Trystan sat beside her, captivated by her dedication and brilliance. She was something special. Every prospective bride his mother paraded in front of him was missing one thing. They weren't her. He brushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear, planting a gentle kiss on her temple. 

She shook her head slightly, raising an eyebrow. "I appreciate the caffeine boost, but don't get any ideas about distracting me."

He feigned innocence. "Oh, I'm focused, too." His fingers turned her chin gently toward him.

"I'm not sure we're focused on the same thing." She bit back her smile as she met his gaze. He was still there. Her Trystan. In these moments, it's all she saw. If only they could leave now, head back to New York and pretend none of this ever happened. If only, her smile faulted.

Trystan held up a small, green velvet box between them. "I have something for you." Before she could respond, he opened it to reveal a snake signet ring on a long chain. Intricate inscriptions adorned the inside of the ring, written in Drakovian. Lifting the ring from the box, Trystan draped the chain over her head, allowing it to rest around her neck.

"It's my family's ring," he explained, a softness in his voice. "Each of us has one. It signifies our family and status."

"Of course, it does." And just like that, Crown Prince Trystan flickered to light again. "Why am I wearing it?"

A gentle smile played on his lips as he watched her turn the ring over between her fingers. "Because it's important to me. This ring is believed to protect the wearer, to ward off harm as long as it's close. It's never supposed to leave my possession, but with you, I know it's safe. You have no idea what your presence in my life means to me. You are the most important thing to me."

Her guard wavered as she absorbed his words. Her eyes filled with a vulnerability she had worked hard to keep locked away. "I don't know what to say..."

"Don't say anything." He leaned in, pressing a lingering kiss on her lips. "Happy Birthday," he whispered against them.

Her tender expression twisted to confusion. "It's not—Is it?" She turned away quickly, grabbing her phone, reading the date—August 27. "I didn't realize." 

Trystan's smile remained gentle as he took her hand. "I know you're not one for celebrations, Lilah. But you deserve to be remembered." His thumb brushed over her knuckles. 

A whisper of gratitude escaped her lips. "Thank you."

"I love you, Lilah."

Her reply was lost on his lips as she kissed him. "I love you, too."

As they parted to catch their breath, matching smiles on their faces, Trystan had one more surprise. "We can stay here—" He gestured to the case files before her. "I am happy to get you as much coffee as you need."

"But?" 

"If you are interested, there may be a romantic dinner for two waiting in my suite," Trystan continued, "with a triple chocolate cake... extra chocolate, just for you.... no candles. no singing. no pressure... unless you want your own very special serenade. It's up to you. I'm here for whatever you need today."

"You make a very tempting offer," she considered. 

"The dinner, cake, or the serenade?" His brow rose curiously.

"Oh, the cake for sure. Chocolate and coffee, you sure know the way to my heart... or stomach?" She smiled as she accepted the hand he offered her, lifting her off the floor. 

"Then shall we go?"

"I'd like that." She nodded softly. "And, Trystan?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

He wrapped his arm around her, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head. "It's my pleasure." 

Thank you so much for reading. I hope you enjoyed this rushed attempt at a birthday fic. I saw her birthday coming, but clearly neglected it to just now. I don't feel like Lilah is big on birthdays and celebrations. It just reminds her what she's missing. I think Trystan would try to bring her joy on her special day, even if it's just the two of them.

[kiryoutann]

Before reading, please check series masterlist to read the warning(s), disclaimer, and to make sure you’re on the right chapter. Minors do NOT interact.

I appreciate the likes, replies, and reblogs! Thank you so much. If you like what I do, you can consider donating to my Kofi. Once again, thanks so much!

Sanlyre flower proved effective to neutralize the poison. After Kusanali ordered the healers to collect it from the rain forest, it was crushed before being given to the villagers following to your suggestion. From this case, apart from academic scholars becoming interested in experimenting with looking for pesticides that have minimal effect on nature, Forest Watcher pays more attention to each agriculture in Sumeru.

You swept your eyes around you with a smile. Although still in the process of recovering from grief, the village of Gandharva was once again bustling with young children running around healthily. Kusanali approached you and stopped to stand next to you.

“A heartwarming sight, isn't it?”

You give her a nod. "Very." You agree with her.

"The people of Sumeru... I would trade anything to see them smile forever." Her voice is soft, full of sincerity that makes you turn your face to her. Kusanali did the same, giving you a small smile after. “Surely none of this would have happened without you. I am truly indebted to you and His Highness Prince Childe.”

"I just do what I believe to be right." You replied back, fixing your gaze on the laughing children surrounding Childe. “After all, how can I do nothing when it concerns them?”

Following your eyes, Kusanali land her green irises on Childe. The children obviously adored him. Two of them were dangling around his legs while one was being carried on his shoulder, they all had large smiles on their faces. She returned her attention to you when she heard you giggle.

"His Highness is very good with children." She commented, watching a proud smile plaster on you.

“He is.”

"He really loves you too."

Kusanali saw your smile fall as you turned to her as if she had just cursed you. Her brow furrows above her green eyes, almost reflecting the expression on your face. You almost want to deny it but, you realize that is exactly how it's supposed to look like.

"Ah," you gathered the words in your head. "We are husband and wife after all.”

Kusanali isn't known as the Goddess of Wisdom for nothing. Although you pretend to blush from her comments, you will not always succeed in hiding what is truly going on between you and Childe. Unlike most people, Kusanali can read you more than you think.

How complicated your relationship is. In front of people, you both act like a loving married couple—thinking it was just a deception. While in the truth, you really do love each other.

However, though she is eager to help you in clearing the fog, she knows this is something that only you and Childe must deal with. With a small smile that adorns her face, Kusanali hopes that you won't be too late to realize that.

The diplomatic visit ended the next day. In the morning, the maids are already busy loading your and Childe's belongings onto the carriage that will take you to the port to return to Snezhnaya. You were busy getting ready in your room while Childe was in Kusanali's study.

"I have prepared it as you requested."

Childe turned to Kusanali after she finished speaking. He landed blue eyes on the white cloth, which was lifted to reveal a single flower with shining petals emanating a color he loved.

“Ramon, one of Sumeru's most exquisite blooms.” Kusanali said

"Good."

Kusanali told the servant to wrap the flower in extra fabric. After he confirmed it was safe, she ordered it to be carried onto the carriage with extra care. She once again turned to Childe.

"You have done a lot Sumeru, yet, all you asked for was a single flower?" To be sure, she inquired.

The man turned to face the window, making his figure a silhouette. He caught sight of you standing not far from the carriage, chatting with the Sumeru nobles who would be bidding their farewells to the two of you later.

"I intend to place it in a garden." he told her.

Before Kusanali could respond back, a knock on the door made them both turn to Dmitri who entered after being invited. After bowing to her, he hurried to Childe's side while holding something small in his hand. He handed the Prince a handkerchief, and Kusanali saw the needlework on it.

“Yarrow flowers.” she smiled. "Do you know the meaning of that?"

“Bravery.” Childe responded with certainty.

Something cracked a smile on the girl's face. "Did you know there's another meaning to that?" She asked.

For a few moments, Childe was silent in thought.

"Peace?" He tries, but she shakes her head. "Hmm.. friendship?"

A laugh escaped her. “Please try to guess again, Your Highness.” She says.

He hesitated before saying, “Love?”

Her green eyes sparkled with enthusiasm. "Almost." She watched Childe let out a breath before giving him the answer,

"Eternal love."

Childe froze in place the moment Kusanali spoke those words. He looked around for signs she was lying to him yet, all he found was a gentle smile that lifted her round cheeks. Kusanali repeated exactly the same sentence.

Eternal love.

A love that makes 'forever' seem insufficient. The kind of love that never ends, a love so strong that nothing in the world can erase it—not even death. If another universe actually did exist, perhaps it would even be able to travel through time and space to be found again.

Kusanali landed her gaze on the handkerchief that Childe was firmly holding. "I assume the handkerchief was given to you." When she said that, the memory of you giving it to him flashed through his head.

“I wonder which meaning she embroidered for you.”

At that time, Childe thought the meaning of the yarrow flower you embroidered for him was your wish for his courage—after all, you gave it on the first day of the hunt. But now that Kusanali had said that, he too was left wondering.

For the first time, Childe wished his presumption had been incorrect.

Kusanali turned around towards the door with a satisfied smile. She has played her part to push you both.

At the front of the Surasthana palace building, you turn when you hear the sound of footsteps. Childe and Kusanali came out followed by Dmitri and Alhaitham. You excused yourself from your conversation with the nobles and went over to them.

“Lord Kusanali.” You greet her.

“Your Highness.” She turned to the stagecoach that was ready. “To having to part ways with you is such a terrible thing."

“I hope this separation is not forever. Know that we will treat you at Snezhnaya just as wonderfully as you have treated us these last several days.” You bowed to her, "Until we meet again, Lord Kusanali."

The girl's hand cupped yours. “Please,” Her big green eyes looked at you before she continued, “call me Nahida.”

Definitely not what you were anticipating. Even so, you welcomed her request with a big smile. Another friendship in the making—one you hope will help you achieve your goal of making the world a little bit warmer.

“I hope we will meet again, Nahida.”

Your conversation concludes with Childe holding out his hand to you, leading you to your carriage. After the servants closed the door for you, you gave Nahida and Alhaitham—who, surprisingly, smiled at you—one more glance.

Not long after, the horse-drawn carriage sped off, bringing this diplomatic visit to an end; taking you both back to Snezhnaya.

“Ensure that it is well implanted."

As soon as you reached Snezhnaya, Childe dismounted the carriage and gave an order. The maids nodded and carried the cloth-covered object carefully. You let go of his hand after your flat shoes stepped on the ground.

"What is that?" you ask.

“Ah, that?” Childe smiled. “Ramon Flower.”

Your brow furrowed, "Did the Lord give it to you?"

"No, I requested it."

A pause. "I didn't realize you were an admirer of flowers." You remarked.

"I like the color."

When he turns to look at you, you feel like he's been looking into your eyes for too long so you're the one who turns your head to Dmitri who is busy arranging for the maids in charge of unloading both of your belongings. However, that didn't last long as the confidant then made his way towards you and Childe.

"Forgive the interruption, but the tax meeting is about to begin." Dmitri informed him.

Childe sighed, "I still have a lot of work to do, huh?"

Dmitri quickly nodded. “That's true, but,” –his serious face turned into a grin the second he landed his eyes on you–“perhaps if you give His Highness a word of encouragement, he will be able to get through this long day well.”

“A word of encouragement?” you ask.

When you turned your gaze to Childe, you didn't expect his expression. Blue eyes are fixedly unwavering onto you behind slightly arched brows. Underneath his rosy cheeks, his pink lips pouted slightly as he silently waited for something.

Wait, was he really waiting for it?

You looked up at Dmitri and noticed that his face was quite similar to Childe's, except that instead of pursed, his lips parted wide as he stared at you with hope he didn't hide. You hold in a sigh and give the two of them a fake smile.

"Your Highness, please don't trouble Dmitri."

The 'word of encouragement' that came out of your lips broke Childe's expectations. His lips curved downwards. “Those are your words of encouragement?” Childe protested.

You intended to hold back your laughter at first, but it's difficult now because he looks just like a grumpy deer. The more you laughed, the more his brows wrinkled. You want to pinch his puffy cheeks.

“God,” you wiped your tears while suppressing your laughter. "I'm sorry, that was funny."

Even though Childe was irritated, his chest warmed up after hearing you laugh. It's better than everything, it's more beautiful than everything.

"Then, let me try it once more." You said.

The world held its breath for that fleeting moment when you broke out a smile in the middle of Snezhnaya's summer. It chilled his heart like cold water on the hottest day, it quenched his thirst like a traveler who has just found an oasis after a long journey through the desert; yet, at the same time, his chest swells from how much you make him feel like he's the only one receiving sunlight.

“Please do your duty well, Your Highness.”

Childe will choose your voice over any instrument. Childe will appreciate those words over any poetry. No musician could make him like this, no poet could make him like this. Only you, you alone.

If it wasn't for Dmitri waking him up, he would already be an idiot standing in front of you with a red face. You watched your husband's back move away, waving at Dmitri mouthing his thanks to you.

“Your Highness?”

Your head turns to Laura, "Laura, what's wrong?"

"I wanted to inform you that your older brother is here on a visit."

Your brows went upward in surprise when you heard it. "Shiva?" You see her nodding yes to your question. "Where is he now?"

“He is in a meeting to see His Majesty the King.”

It wasn't unusual for Shiva to meet a ruler from another country—considering he would be the one to inherit the throne to become the next emperor of Liyue—but, you'd be quite surprised he didn't tell you about his arrival some time before this. Your feet carry you into the palace of Zapolyarny followed by your ladies-in-waiting. You walk down a long hallway but, stop when you encounter a familiar figure.

“Brother?”

The long-haired man turned to you. Shiva looked at you with a smile on his face and afterwards approached you to give his sister a closer greeting.

“I thought you were speaking with His Majesty.” You tell him.

"I thought so too however, his confidant stated he was still talking to the others. More time for me to explore." He examines you from head to toe, making a facial expression you don't understand. "I'm shocked you're doing well here."

Your brows furrowed with distaste, "What are you implying?"

“I thought your bastard of a husband—"

"Brother."

You interrupt him with a glare, glancing sideways warning him not to be disrespectful since your maids are right behind you (plus, one of them is Childe's spy). Shiva put his hands up in surrender, yet you could tell he'd do it again because of the way he smirked afterwards.

“Prince Shiva!”

The deep voice of the new person echoed throughout the hallway. You and Shiva turned to the King who was beaming in your direction, behind him Duke Maxim and his secretary trailed behind. He nodded accepting the bows of the ladies in waiting behind you before stopping right in front of you.

“Please excuse my tardiness,” He chuckled, shaking your brother's hand. “the Duke enticed me with the red wine he just brought from Zhilchik.”

That last sentence made you and Shiva turn to the handsome man next to him. He bowed politely, greeting you and your brother. You flashed a faint smile in return, hoping it was enough to hide your awkwardness as the tea party incident that ended in disaster replayed in your brain.

“No problem. My sister keeps me entertained with rather interesting conversations.”

From your mention, the King turned his attention to you. “That reminds me, how is Sumeru? Has the Lord treated you well?” he asked.

You give him a deep nod, “Of course, Your Majesty.” You then continued, "The Lord looks forward to meeting you on our next diplomatic visit,"

The King's thunderous laughter almost startles you. He smiles behind his bushy beard, giving you a light pat on the arm. "Is that true? In that case, I really ought to make time for it..” He slipped it in between his laughs. "Are you available? Come have tea with us."

"Ah?" You glanced at Shiva before turning back to the older man with a nervous laugh. “I can't possibly do that. This is a meeting between Your Majesty and His Highness Prince Shiva.”

“This is not a formal occasion. Besides, I want to hear about your visit to Sumeru.” He says.

“I agree with His Majesty.” Shiva replied, not taking your side.

"So it's decided then," The King raised a broad smile as he snapped his fingers to summon his secretary to his side. “Vlad, add one more chair for Princess (Y/N). Wait, make that two! Duke, you promised to have tea with me, right?”

Maxim smiled and replied, “Of course, Your Majesty.”

In the end, you sat at the same table with the King, the Duke, and Shiva at the sumptuous table set up. Unlike the tea parties you usually organize and attend, the lack of flowers on the table constantly reminds you that you shouldn't be here. You feel insecure afraid of preventing them from discussing about crucial diplomatic issues.

The servant poured the tea carefully into the three cups, bowing after he finished. You stare at the brown color that reflects you in it. The sweet aroma of tea greeted your nose.

“I ordered the cooks to prepare the most delicious tea here. Though, I don't believe it can compare to Liyue's.”

To prove his point, the King entwined his fingers around the cup's handle and brought it to his lips. He took a sip, but, rather than having a satisfied expression, he furrowed his brows before coughing hard. Hurriedly, he quickly put down the cup to cover his cough with his fist.

The King took the handkerchief next to his plate. However, instead of subsiding, the cough was worse than before. You and Shiva turned to each other.

“Your Majesty, are you alright—”

Before you finish your words, your gaze catch the color which then stains the handkerchief in his hand. Your eyes widen as you watch the liquid dripping from his lips and landing on his shirt, tablecloth, and cup.

Blood. Lots of blood.

The coughing got worse as the background noise grew louder. Vlad rushed to run to the King before he hit the floor. Your back feels cold, but for some reason you can't look away from watching the tea spilling from the cup.

Déjà vu.

Your hands are shaking just like when you drank the poison that was actually meant for Lumine. Even though your heart is racing, the absence of the burning sensation in your throat is what makes you realize that you haven't taken poison.

Why, then, was the King now writhing in agony on the floor?

You stiffened in your seat until Shiva pulled your hand away from the table. Meanwhile the maids and guards had been running to summon healers. Vlad was clearly perspiring as he continued to call out to the King in hopes of receiving a response.

“The tea has been poisoned!!”

Duke Maxim's loud voice startled you. The tea has been poisoned? You don't know what to think. Shiva took you in his arms hoping it would calm you down.

“The tea has been poisoned!! The king has been poisoned! Maids! Quickly throw away this tea!”

But how? Incidents like this—why didn’t you see any of this?

Despite your erratic breathing, you try to calm your mind while hoping that the ringing in your ears subsides. You glanced at the teacup, then at the bloodstains and then at the healers who had barged in through the door and immediately checked on the man who was now unconscious.

Then, it hits you.

Your fingers trembled as they peeled off the others. Your breath catches at the end of your throat. Shiva's hand that should comfort you has never felt so foreign.

Shiva.. did he do this?

"Maids!! Hey! You heard me?! Throw this tea away!”

Tea, coughing up blood, loss of consciousness. You experienced all of that after swallowing the poison he put in Lumine's cup. But, if he really is the brains behind all this, what drives him to do it? And why do you feel his chest as pounding as yours?

One of the healers broke your train of thoughts by breaking the most shocking news that then reverberated through the room,

"The King.. he’s gone."

AbbyBianx, ness

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[fizzingwizard]

Things that happened this week

A pigeon sometimes hangs out at my apartment and starts making noise around 5 am. On Thursday, it not only started making noise, but it went on nonstop. Such a racket. It was raining, so it spent a longer time on my balcony. Actually, when I looked outside at 7, it was still there, taking shelter right above my washing machine. By then it was quiet, so I opened the door... nothing happened... closed the door... pigeon flew away. Idk.

Played "We're going on a lion hunt" (youtube video) for my class. Every year it's a big hit, but this year's class is the most mesmerized. It's the first time I worried they might be legitimately scared, rather than just having fun pretending. Of course, if even one kid was really scared, I wouldn't make them watch. But they were having fun, they just are more expressive than other classes. One kid had his hands covering his mouth and eventually his eyes. When I checked on him, he was laughing. Another girl started saying "Scary! no no!" so I asked if she wanted to hold my hand. Not only did she hold my hand, she came riiiight up close to see the video better hahahaha.

The understaffing has reached critical levels. I did overtime twice this week. My coworker was supposed to have a day off, had been approved and everything, but at the last minute the manager asked her to make it a half day because there was no one available to cover her. We have help from other campuses almost every day. Today, after the kids woke up from nap, I was supposed to be in a room with three other teachers... none of whom are ECE teachers or work at my school regularly. I was able to switch one of them out for a sub who used to be one of our regular classroom teachers, so I trust her. But if she'd been subbing somewhere else Idek.

Have a student who I think I've mentioned before, his parents are super overprotective. Although now it seems to be mainly the dad's issue. Dad's been keeping his kid home on days that he doesn't have to work. I don't even understand what he's upset about, although I'm told it began last year when his kid went outside, and then had a fever later in the day (???). What does he want, to keep the kid indoors his whole life? He won't meet and talk to us about his concerns. He sent a condescending letter with a list of requirements for caring for his son, all of which we were already doing. We have simply started doing them more (ie. when the kid doesn't actually need it - like changing his shirt every day even if he doesn't get sweaty). It does not impress him. This kid has seizures when he has a high fever, and when it happened last month we followed his chart meticulously. What did the parents do? Complain that their kid was "just hot," come pick him up at their usual time, and then go out to eat. When they got home, kid had a seizure. Guess who's at fault? Us, because... reasons??? Again, we did EVERYTHING we were told to do by his doctor and parents, so. I'm not sure, but I get the impression the parents think we should have given the kid his medication. But as none of us are doctors, there are only certain circumstances where we can give meds, and those are stipulated, again, on his chart. At the time, the criteria for us to give meds wasn't met - the whole reason for informing his parents so they could take him home and care for him themselves. Despite the fact that this was the approved plan by everyone concerned, parents still think we should have been able to miraculously prevent this. Another time his parents complained that we weren't wiping his nose. Yes, we are, every five seconds. It just so happens that one time out of the hundreds that they picked him up, his nose had gone two minutes without being wiped while teachers cared for you know all our other kids. We have made a very obvious point to wipe his nose in front of his parents since then. Today, I had been up and down literally nonstop wiping lots of kids noses. I'm not exaggerating at all. And this kid has the runniest nose of them all. I had literally just wiped his nose and thrown out the tissue when I turned around and saw it was running again. So I asked him to go get me another tissue. The tissue box was right there, the kids help themselves all the time, and all he had to do was grab a tissue and bring it to me bc my legs were freaking exhausted. Of course, this is when his mom decides to show up. XP She couldn't arrive during the 99 other times I'm running around after her kid with a tissue, only during the 1 time I ask him to get his own tissue. She immediately grabs the tissue from him and wipes his nose herself. Idek. I'd love to show her the video of how all I've done in in the last half hour is run around wiping noses, but I know it wouldn't make a difference even if I could. In this family's opinion, only their kid matters. Dad wants to pull the kid out of our school. I love the student, but to be rid of the parents, honestly, I'm not gonna fight it too hard...

[shad-the-rad]

Stupid life blah-ing under the cut, don’t bother

TLDR; did you know deep breathing exercises actually help when youre anxious? Who knew?!

(As I re-read this, I get how this sounds like lame r/thathappened material, but I promise it literally just happened. I’m not really expecting anyone to read this so why would I lie?)

Ugh today I was waiting for my to go order at the Mexican restaurant across the street when a (clearly) drunk man came staggering in (he is literally clutching a bottle of whiskey to his chest during this whole encounter), demanding to use the restroom. There was a sign on the front door and the counter saying ‘no public restroom’ but tbf I guess we can’t count on a drunk guy to read. So he stumbles up to the register and asks the lady at the counter, and I quote, “Where estas el baño?” She politely explains that there is no public restroom. One of the male BOH guys walks behind her, so the drunk guy quickly throws out a “Primo, donde esta el baño?” (in admittedly pretty good Spanish, so I guess he thought he was being funny at the start there). BOH guy quickly shakes his head and gestures to the lady like ‘take it up with her, man.’

Drunk guy scowls and asks for a cup for water. Lady politely sets it in front of him, probably already guessing what comes next. And yes! He lays his hand on the cup and pushes his about three inches from hers and asks to use the restroom, now that he’s a customer. She tells him again the bathroom is not a public bathroom.

He abandons the cup and continues to argue, while the poor counter lady is clearly trying to figure out how to get rid of him now he’s here. So fuck it, I step up. I know I would’ve wanted someone in my corner if I were that lady.

I say in my best I-deal-with-nine-year-olds-all-day voice, “Sir, I think she’s made herself pretty clear.”

He turns to me and says, “Oh has she? Well I think it’s none of your business.”

Which, strictly speaking, it’s not. I’m eating to go. But I’m gonna look even stupider if I back down now.

So I meet his eyes and raise my eyebrows in my best is-that-how-we’re-supposed-to-be-behaving-right-now? look. It works on the nine year olds about 75% of the time.

This successfully gets his attention off of the counter lady and on to me.

He says something to the effect of, “What is your business anyway? Maybe you’re here to give me a little kiss?” And he leans forward a few inches, lips puckered and I know better than to lean away so I let him get in my bubble and continue looking at him.

Aaand long story short he walks slowly out of the restaurant backwards, making explicit sexual comments to me the whole time, and I do my best to maintain eye contact, smiling and nodding at him, until he finally stumbles out the door and around the corner.

The counter lady was grateful and I told her that I used to hate belligerent customers who can’t take a hint, and we smile at each other, and I get my food a few minutes later.

Thankfully the walk home is literally less than two minutes, and I kept a calm exterior, but I can’t pretend I wasn’t internally a paranoid mess walking home. The moment I got home I dissolved into panicked sobbing and spent five minutes trying to calm myself down. Finally opened my breathe app on my watch and was able to get a hold of myself.

I fucking hate that I felt like that. I hate that I even let his stupid dumbass comments get to me. I know it’s because I am an SA survivor that it impacts me that badly. But I’m mostly just pissed off that a man feels so comfortable talking to me like that in a public setting, and that he was clearly trying to do it to make me as uncomfortable as I became. Fuck that guy. Hope he pissed himself.

[jazzykitten]

~

"I don't hate you," were the first words that came out of Berlioz's mouth. Words that came out so instantaneously that he hadn't had time to process anything else his brother said. The one that stuck out most was that Toulouse truly thought Berli hated him. Had he been so selfish and cruel while he pushed everyone away they mistook it for hatred? It was the other way around. Berlioz loathed himself, thinking that he was worthless or a waste of space. He knew he was selfish and hurt the ones he cared about and it's a heavy weight on his shoulders. He felt guilty, especially when he compared Toulouse to their father. It was unfair of him. He was still so hurt though. He knew Toulouse and Marie were too. Berlioz had tore them apart, limb from limb, until their family had shattered from the inside out. "There's a difference between giving someone space and pretending they don't exist. I suppose that means there's a difference between pushing people away and setting boundaries too then." He looked away from his brother, tears stinging his eyes. He could not cry in front of Toulouse. He had to pretend he was fine and not that he was starting to feel the early withdrawal effects of needing drugs. It was an itch that wouldn't go away no matter how hard or how long you scratched at it. In the end the skin would end up red and raw and one would succumb to easing the pain. Drugs were sort of similar that way. You scratched and scratched until you gave in and grabbed the lotion.

"I just wanted you to acknowledge my existence but not hover. I-- I do shit you would never approve of. Shit you don't need to know about so you can sleep at night." He glances back at his brother, trying to ignore the gaze of the cashier and other customers. He was growing paranoid and he needed something to ease that. Home was just around the corner but he knew it was too late to bolt now. He was stuck. "I don't know what you want from me either, you know. You can be sorry all you want but what are you apologizing for? Are you sorry I overdosed or are you sorry you weren't there to prevent it? It's not a fucking secret I was using drugs. The inevitable happened but I'm still here. So don't be fucking sorry for it." He stomach felt unsettled, specifically after he said the word 'overdose.' He could count on one hand how many times he'd said the actual word out loud. He hated it. It made things too real. He just wanted to be in his happy place and relax. Toulouse was getting in the way of that.

"If you want to hand out apologies, fine. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have compared you to our dad. That was a low blow. I'm sorry I'm such a piece of shit that you consistently avoid me, more than I avoid you or Marie. I'm sorry I'm not a carbon-fucking-copy of you, golden boy. I can hear mother saying it now. 'Oh, Toulouse, you're so wonderful. You're such a great big brother to look after your siblings.' When's the last time any of us have told her the truth about anything though?! She doesn't know you're at wits end or that Marie is a lot more fragile than she lets on. She doesn't know how unwell I am. None of you do." Admitting it out loud made it too real. Words were coming out before he could think of how to string them together. He was unwell. He was an addict and he had no intention of changing that. He didn't care. To him his own existence was a waste. "Just...just get out of my way, Lou. All I want to do is go home and I think you probably want to do the same and drink a bottle or two, huh? You cannot judge my habits when yours are no better."

it was selfish of him to think so, toulouse knew that, but berlioz's anger didn't feel fair. despite everything the elder had sacrificed for his brother, his family, it seemed like it all was USELESS and worth nothing to them. what was the point of giving up your entire future, your entire sense of self, your CHILDHOOD — if that sacrifice was going to be trampled all over ?? the man parted his lips to speak, but toulouse's jaw clamped shut when his brother started talking, nostrils flaring as the first thing out of his mouth was the one thing toulouse wasn't able to dispute. he had no ammo, a gun aimed forward with an empty magazine and a safety that couldn't be switched off. it felt like a spear to his chest, being compared to their father, and it took everything in the man to not step forward and swing his fist into the other's jaw. he stayed silent until berlioz granted him permission to speak. how thoughtful. ❛ i didn't know. you don't talk to me anymore... and marie likes to pretend everything is fine because she shouldn't have to worry about us. i found out through word of fuckin' mouth, berlioz.❜ toulouse stepped forward, closing some of the distance between them, emotion burning hot in his throat as hurt and relief swelled in his chest like chords filled with dissonance. ❛ i'm not perfect, i'm not always right, but you don't get to stand there and tell me what i did and didn't do. what i have and haven't sacrificed.❜ i just couldn't accept that i had failed you, my little brother, by not recognizing what you were going through before it was nearly too late because i am drunk more often then i'm not.

❛ i'm sorry you almost died and i didn't know what to say to you to fix things. i didn't know if i should apologize or coddle you or WHAT. it was fucked up of me not to text you or reach out, but what good what that have done ?? you still would have hated me. you still would have seen me the same way you do now, and the same way you always have. i thought i was giving you the space you wanted. ❜

[treasuringizu]

-empty night

⇝ izuku midoriya x reader | fluff / sprinkle of angst | izuku midoriya being a dork

⇝ word count: 1.2k

⇝ a/n: it's like i can't write any drabbles less than 1k now😭

⇝ synopsis: izuku is late to your date, but when he shows up you can't help but forgive him.

it’s 9:45 p.m when you look at the clock for probably the thousandth time in the past two hours. he was supposed to be here at 7:30.

you check your phone, and you see notifications from socials, one from your friend, and random apps — but none from the person you want to see the most.

the nice waiter that’s been serving you (you pretend you don’t see his pity glances) refills your glass of water, taking your empty plate of fries. when you check your phone again and there’s still nothing there, you decide that’s when it’s time for you to finally leave instead of hoping for him to show up.

and then you’re walking down the sidewalk, shivering because you forgot to bring a coat, and wallowing in your own sadness. well, a mixture of sadness, disappointment, and maybe anger.

you’ve checked all the news cites to see if anything serious had happened to him, called and texted the man in question but received no answer, and you even called his own friends to try and figure out what was going on, but you got nothing. you just hope that he’s okay at least, and that he had a good reason for standing you up — one that hopefully did not involve any violence.

you’re checking your phone again, dumbly wanting there to be something new like it could have happened in less than a minute, when you see the crackle of green lighting in the night sky.

deku.

izuku.

he lights the darkness up with his quirk, piercing through the sky with god-like speed. you're watching him as he descends to the ground, landing in his stance a few meters in front of you. you blink, and then all you can see is a blur of green as he breaks into a full-on sprint — on the fucking sidewalk.

you can feel your eyebrows shoot up to your hairline, and you know your jaw is on the ground as you watch the pro hero you’re in love with run past you, your clothes flapping in the gush of wind as a result of his speed, fallen leaves flying randomly.

he’s long behind you now, and your brain doesn’t even process anything that just happened as you blink slowly, mouth still open to catch flies. it’s only when you hear his footsteps coming back this way that you turn around, and there he is, jogging towards you. his pace has decreased, enough that you can see him clearly and not just a blur of green lighting.

he’s looking around, searching for something as he continues, and then he spots you. you manage to get your mouth closed by the time he’s almost in front of you, slowing down until he’s standing before you.

you’re staring at him as he wipes sweat from his forehead. he doesn't even look tired from his whole ass marathon, but he’s all disheveled; his curly hair is sticking up in all different places, probably from the flight and then the fucking sprinting, his clothes are wrinkled, and his eyes are wide.

he tries to straighten his appearance — dusting off his shirt and pants, running his fingers through his hair in an attempt to fix it, but the action only makes it worse. his mouth opens and closes multiple times like a fish, trying to find the words to say when all that comes out is a measly- “hi!”

the greeting is accompanied by a sheepish smile that falters when all he gets in return is a frown from you. your mouth opens, but you don’t even get anything out before he breaks down into a babbling mess.

“i’m sorry! I’m so, so, so, so, so, so sorry. i really am! you see — a lot happened - i was in my meeting, counting down the minutes until i could get out of there to finally go and see you, it was all i was looking forward to the entire day, really. but then, the meeting ran over and i tried — i really tried to get my way out of there but you know how they are, so it didn’t work no matter what i did. and when the meeting finally ended, it was already a little late so i rushed home to change and get ready for you, i wanted to look nice and stuff, but i was already a little late. i forgot to call or at least text you through all that drama,”

his hands are now waving all around him in animated gestures as he continues, “by then i was like an hour late, and by the time i was halfway to the restaurant i realized that i had forgotten my phone at the agency so i couldn’t even contact you. and thennn as i was flying, this lady was calling out for help, so of course, i rushed to help her, only for it to end up being her cat stuck in a tree. i tried to get it over with as soon as possible but then she cornered me and practically forced me into her house to give me some coffee as thanks, and i didn't have the heart to tell her that i absolutely hate coffee so i forced it all down. when i left her house it was already dark and i knew that i was beyond late to our date and again, i'm so, so, so, sorry about that even though i know all of this isn't a good excuse for standing you up. i just - i,"

izuku stops in the middle of his sentence, shocked when you wrap your arms around his waist, resting your head on his chest and effectively putting a stop to his ramblings.

you breathe him in, nuzzling your cheek against his body, admiring his scent and relishing in his presence. he says your name in a soft murmur, wrapping his own arms around you, the weight strong and heavy.

"i'm glad you're okay," you say.

his head settles on top of yours. "i'm sorry."

"you should be." he tenses, and you think he's about to remove his arms from around you but you squeeze him tighter, smiling into his chest. "only you would stand me up for a grandma. she better have been hot.”

he huffs through his nose in a laugh. “you’re definitely hotter.”

your heart warms, and all the feelings you had earlier melt into contentment now that he's actually here. "keep up with the compliments and i might just forgive you." you let go of him - grinning at the soft whine he lets out - and instead grab his hand, intertwining it with yours.

"I'm still so, so, sorry though. i never meant to leave you there like that."

your hands are swinging back and forth, and you look at him to see him frowning at his shoes like they personally offended him. giving his hand a chaste kiss that makes his cheeks bloom in pink, you reassure him, "stop apologizing, dummy. it's okay, i know you didn't do it on purpose. besides, you saved a cat, which earns you some brownie points."

izuku gives you that grin, the one that can make rainy clouds go away. "that's true." he pauses, bending down to give your cheek a kiss. "i love you"

"love you too, stupid."

[fallingforunrealisticromance]

By your side. Forever - 11th doctor x reader

A/N: i guess disappearing for months on end is my new thing!! Anyways, HI! What are peoples thoughts on david tennants glorious return to doctor who??

Summary: Based on S5 Ep3 Victory of the Darleks

Warnings: None

***= time skip

Requests

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We stood on the roof looking out onto a version of London I'd only ever seen in the picture of a history book - WW2 England. We could hear the planes above us as we gazed at the Zeplins floating across the city.

"I can't believe it" I said, almost in a whisper

"Can't believe what?" The doctor turned his gaze towards me.

"I'm in London. World war two London! I mean this is insane. You do know i literally wrote an essay on this exact time period to pass my history GCSE and now here i am!" I laughed taking in the sights

The doctor beamed at me. "It is pretty cool, isnt it"

"Even cooler that you seem to be best pals with the prime minister. Which you failed to mention when i asked you to tell me about yourself i might add." I said, jabbing him with my elbow.

"Well, in all fairness, it slipped my mind." He replied whilst fidegting with his bow tie.

"It slipped your mind?? How exactly do you forget your friends with one of the most influential men in british histor-"

But my remarks were cut short as suddenly a Nazi plane was shot down above us. More like incinerated. My heart stopped. My blood ran cold. I would know that electric beam anywhere. Instinctively The doctor grasped my hand, threading his fingers through mine. My grip was as strong as his. We were frozen in fear, the gravity of the situation collapsing in on us. They can't be here. Not now.

"Please. No" I begged. The doctor pulled my closer to him as he marched over to Winston.

"What was that? Where the hell did that come from?" His voice was low but the fear and anger that ran through his was evident.

"I told you Doctor, I'm willing to win me this war, by any means necessary. And Bracewell has provided with a solution." He gestured to the man standing above us.

I wanted to run. I wanted to drag the doctor back to the TARDIS, fly away and pretend it never happened. But I couldn't. Our fears were confirmed by the sound of metallic wheels appearing from behind the wall of sandbags. My stomach dropped.

************************************************************************

"No..." The doctors breathing sounded panicked, his voice quiet as if he wasn't aware he was speaking out loud. We were back inside now, yet still the daleks were here.

"No you- you can't be here. I destroyed you. How are you here?" His tone was increasing. He fidgeted with his hands in an attempt to calm himself down which was failing miserably.

"HOW ARE YOU HERE" He bellowed, moving towards the metal monster in front of him.

"I am here to serve you." The robotic voice replied.

"NO! No you are my ENEMY. YOU WANT NOTHING MORE THAN DESTRUCTION" He yelled.

"I do not understand" The robot looked around.

I stood back, watching the doctor with a heavy heart. I knew what this meant for him.

"Doctor please would you calm down." Winston churchill said looking rather confused.

"Calm down? How the hell am i supposed to calm down when you have a DARLEK planted right in front of me" His eyes flamed with rage as his chest rose as a hurried pace.

"They are not darleks they are my ironsides!" Bracewell insisted but the doctor ignored him.

"No matter what I do. No matter how hard I fight. They always come back. Always. They still remain while i lose everything." The doctor began pacing up and down, running his fingers frantically through his hair.

"Doctor." I called. He continued to pace

"My planet, my people.

"Doctor" I tried again, moving towards him.

"Rose, oh god Rose. Her family-"

"DOCTOR" I shouted, standing in front of him with my hands planted firmly on his chest, causing him to look up at me. The eyes I was met with were not the kind, loving brown ones i'd grown so fond of - rather a panicked cloud of despair.

I placed my hands on his shoulders in order to keeping him steady.

"You are okay." I stated.

"No. None of this is okay. No matter what i do they always come back. I can't-" He looked utterly broken. My heart hurt for him. "I can't lose anything else. Not to them." He admited, looking at the floor.

"I know. I how terrifying this is for you. Look at me." I said, my tone soft. His eyes raised once again to meet mine.

"You are not alone. I was there with you at canary warf." He flinched slightly at the memory. "And I am here with you now." I reached my hand down and linked it with his.

"I am not leaving you. This isn't a burden you are expected to carry alone. Whatever you decide, I will follow you. You have the strength. You can do this." I said hoping he would understand the sincerity behind my words.

He gazed back at me, the panic having been replaced with a sense of fascination. Slowly, he raised his free hand to cup my face.

"You are the one thing i've come across in this world that is a genuine beauty to know." His words took me by surprise, causing my cheeks to flush red. No one had ever showed me such kindness in their words.

Before I could recover from what he'd said, he leant forward bringing his lips to mine. His arm wrapped around my waist, pulling me flush against him. My arms wrapped around his neck, threading their way through his soft hair. His lips moulded against mine moving in perfect rhythm. He kissed with such genuine love and passion it took my breath away.

Eventually we pulled away from each other, my forehead resting against his. My lips already felt empty without him. I was grinning like an idiot as I opened my eyes and peered up at him.

"I've been waiting for that." I whispered, chuckling slightly.

"I didn't realise quite how badly i wanted to do that until just know." He replied, smiling twice as hard.

An awkward cough came from beside us as Winston shuffled uncomfortably. The doctors face flushed red from embarrassment as if he'd forgotten where we were.

"Oh don't be so british, Winston. I'm sure this isn't the first time you've witnessed a kiss or two." I said, winking at him.

The doctor laughed as he pulled me into his side once more, his arm firmly around my waist. I turned back to him before glancing at the Darlek disappearing down the corridor. I was just as scared as he was. Everything in me was telling me to run, take the doctor to safety. But that wasn't us. We helped. We saved people. We stayed.

I looked up at the time lord. "Ready to save the world?" I asked with a grin.

"You bet." He replied, grabbing my hand and pulling me out of the room.

God was i in love with that man.

[tetsvhoe]

REGRET AND OTHER CLICHES [2]

you never know what you have until it’s gone, so they say. you think by now they should have known that.

pt. 1 i know who you pretend i am [2]

character/s: akaashi keiji x gn!reader

genre/s: mostly angst idk why i tell myself these are angst to fluff

warning/s: none i think

gwen’s notes 🤍: thank you @aka-a-shii for helping me come up with this! i hope u like it aaah ion think this is as painful as the previous parts tho

MASTERLIST | TAGLIST

akaashi keiji

“you seem busy these days, keiji,” you commented dejectedly as you set akaashi’s coffee on the table. he didn’t seem to pick up on your mood as he stuck his nose in front of his laptop’s screen. thick square rimmed glasses sat atop the bridge of his nose haphazardly and features faintly illuminated by the light. he was always effortlessly ethereal no matter what he was doing, even when he was breaking you to pieces.

“mhm,” he mumbled in agreement. he absentmindedly picked the warm mug up and cautiously brought it to his lips, eyes still glued to the screen.

“can i see what you’ve been working on?” you played it off casually though there was an inevitable tremble in your voice and masked your anxiousness with a tight lipped smile. you hugged your warm cup with both hands to steady the shaking.

the faint clicking of the keys halted as he brought his eyes up to meet yours. he was as stoic as ever, but you learned to discern the slightest change in his behavior. even if it was as minor as his eyebrows furrowing together microscopically and his mouth parting just enough to inhale sharply. “maybe when i finish it, darling.” then resumed the faint clicking.

“you always used to let me read your works in progress, ‘kaashi,” you pried, feigning an innocent pout to lighten the increasingly tense situation. part of you wanted him to come clean, another part wanted you to be proven wrong so desperately. so far it seemed as though the former was coming true.

a brief pasue, akaashi glanced around while managing to avoid your gaze, the typing resumed. “this one’s a little bit different,” he reasoned.

“must be important then,” you whispered, feeling your resolve break and your façade of a smile fade. you placed your hands on your lap, eyes trailed downward as you fidgeted with them and in an attempt to hide the tears you knew were going to come. “much more important than i’ll ever be.”

“wha‒” akaashi’s words seemed to have been caught suspended in the air as he finally looked at your broken state. it didn’t take much for him to put two and two together; when he left his office the other night, the way you’ve been acting strange since then, prying about what he was writing.

akaashi knelt beside you, soothingly rubbing your back, and squeezing your hands as you freely let your tears fall. “i’m so sorry, love,” he began, voice soft and calm. he knew there was a possibility that this could happen. he knew getting into a relationship when he was still hung up over someone didn’t come with zero consequences but how was he supposed to go from here? “i can explain.”

“then why?” you cried, feeling pathetic and vulnerable.

“i admit i wasn’t yours entirely when we first started dating.” akaashi harshly bit his bottom lip, realizing how bad that sounded. “but i… i just needed to get everything out of my head and into writing. my thoughts, unresolved feelings, all the what ifs‒”

“and what about me?” he stared at you with wide eyes, confused. “where did i fit into all that, while you were figuring out your feelings for someone else, i was over here devoting mine to you.”

akaashi fell silent, feeling his guilt build up in his chest. “i’m ready now, to devote myself just as much if not more,” he pleaded, sincerity in his eyes as he tried to look in yours.

you scoffed bitterly and his heart lurched in his chest. akaashi was only ever used to your unconditional love and care, one which he took for granted. “oh, are you almost in the conclusion of your little love story?” you didn’t mean to come off so hostile, especially not with your perfectly calm and collected (for now) boyfriend. but you could only do so much when you learn you’ve been cast aside until he was ready for you, when it was convenient for him.

“i’m sorry akaashi, but i’ve just reached the conclusion of our story all the same.”

you bolted out of the place because any longer and you would have fallen victim with his beautiful eyes that shone brighter when he cried. akaashi was left frozen in place. he couldn’t move even as his legs began to ache from crouching for too long. his mouth left agape, wanting to scream or cry or call your name‒anything. but it felt as though he was choking for air. he stumbled over himself after who knows how long and looked around, finally gaining a sense of self back.

his cup of coffee was no longer steaming, but he was sure if he held a palm against it, he would feel its warmth. yours was right next to his, half finished. the bed you both slept on the night before still hadn’t been made. leftovers from your cooking sat coldly in the fridge. your toothbrush was on the sink next to his and a mess of skincare products sprawled on the counter. your shirt was thrown over a chair and the bedroom smelled of your perfume.

his laptop whirred quietly but the barren apartment made it seem so loud. he noticed how the writing displayed on the screen stopped midsentence. just like you and him.

all else pointed out that akaashi was too late and he knew that. but he hoped and prayed that this time when he tried, he would catch up with you and the story you've written all alone. he would make up for everything he did and didn't do so long as you don't turn the page to its last.

@mirakeul @realityisabitch-blr @erinoikawa @haji-bby @seijohoe@szeonn @banananaa4 @qualitygiantshoepsychic @thezebra12 @iwaizumisunshine @stffychn @vvvselfindulgence @devilgirlcrybabiey

[summerlovingbaby]

Traitor Part 8

part one// part two// part three// part four// part five// part 6// part 7

Y/N spent the next two hours sobbing so hard that she was gagging, and the three after that looking off into space. Her eyes lied desolate, and her body lied still and empty. Sometimes she would shiver violently, or a tear would fall down her face. 

Ever since Bakugo forced her to down her meds, Kirishima had been glued to her side, assuming that, what he did would be her breaking point. The straw that broke  the camels back. The thing that would finally force her to get better and be back to normal. Little did Kiri realize, that there is no normal. Not anymore, nit after what happened to her.

After he realized that he left, after seeing Y/N in her state, it looked like she was only moments away from dying, and he just couldn’t stand it. He tried his best to help and comfort her but nothing worked, and then he realized that nothing would probably work. He came to the heartbreaking realization that he wouldn’t be able to help her. He didn’t want to cry in front of her, and it made him feel weak. He felt he had no right to cry, not in front of her.

He almost made it to his room. Almost. He had his door on the doorknob when he sunk to the floor like melted ice cream. Rambling on, in words that nobody would understand. He began to sob so loudly, he was wailing. This attracted the attention of his classmates, who were just beginning to settle in to bed.

Bakugou flew out of his room, in a panic at the sounds of his friends cries. Followed by Mina, Sero, Todoroki and Deku, albiet much slower. Bakugo was by his side in seconds, kneeling to see if he hurt. Once he realized that she wasn’t physically hurt, his concern only grew for Y/N, assuming that something happened to her.

“ Is it Y/N? Is she hurt?” Kirishima only muttered madly in response, which quickly grew into sobbing and incoherent mumbles.

Bakugo’s eyes grew wide in a state of confusion. He himself was on the verge of panic, but he knew that he had to remain calm, if not for his sake, for Kirishima’s sake, and if not for Kirishima’s sake, then for Y/N.

“ What happened?” he asked in as sturdy a voice that he could manage. Kirishima tried to speak, but he only began blubbering again, and crying much louder. Bakugou sensing a oncoming meltdown put a stop to it as soon as possible. “ Uh...uh.. none of that. I can’t help you if you keep talking all that nonsense... if you want my help, I need you to calm down.”

Kirishima wanted to calm down, he really did, but he didn’t no how to very well, which resulted in him just holding his breath and attempting to wipe the tears away. His attempts proved futile, because it didn’t work.

“ Hey... hey... hey. You can’t do that. Just breathe , will ya? In and out I know you know how.”

Slowly, but only slightly Kirishima’s breathing began to slow to a pace that was barely substandard, only enough for him to feel like he wasn’t dying every time he gasped for air, now he only felt like he needed a oxygen tank.

“ Now, can you tell me what happened?” Bakugou asked again.

“ I.... I.... she-she... I don’t think- I don’t think I can help her.” he managed. His breath began to quicken, as he finally admitted it outloud.

“ I’m sure that’s not true.” Mina suggested.

“ I don’t think that she’s going to get better.” he spoke again. This time oddly calm. Tears still flowed down his face, but his voice was oddly stable and calm.

“ She will get better, we just have to stay positive and be there for her!” Sero spoke.

“ She won’t even look at me! SHE FLINCHES WHEN I TOUCH HER.” He yelled. He was starting to get angry, extremely angry, witch was scary to everyone witnessing it,

“ Calm-” Bakugou started.

“ HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CALM DOWN WHEN THE LOVE OF MY LIFE IS SICK, AND IN PAIN, AND WON’T LET ME HELP HER.” He began to stand, with full force full of rage.

“ Love of your life?” Todoroki asked.

“ I RUINED HER LIFE, WE RUINED HER LIFE, AND US STANDING HERE AND PRETENDING THAT WE DIDN’T-, I... she hates me.” His voice dropped off mid statement. “ She hates me, and she has every right to hate me.”

“ Now I’m sure that’s not true.” Mina asked.

“ She called me pathetic, and weak, and a coward..” His voice was frail and shakey. And he felt like he would collapse to his knees again. But he tried his best to remain stable.

“ I’m sure she didn’t mean it.” Sero suggested.

“ She meant it, and she was right.” he said, his eyes darted to the floor in shame. “ I didn’t stick up for her, I wasn’t there for her, not when she needed me. I should have listened to her, I loved her and I thought... She trusted me and I failed her. I should have been there... I failed her.” The last bit came out as a broken whisper. He began n to speak to himself. Then his eyes darted upwards in sudden shock and realization. “ We didn’t even say sorry.”

“ Sorry?” Denki asked.

“ Sorry, for the pain that she is in and the pain we caused her.. for the role that I played in it.” Suddenly as if he was a puppet on a string he beagn to walk back in the direction that he came.

“ Where are you going?” Bakugou asked.

“ To say sorry.”

Meanwhile, halfway across campus, Y/N had just began to physically recover from what just happened. Her head was looking at the ground because she didn’t even have the energy to look up anymore. Then her head suddenly shot up like a bullet.

“ How did you get in here?”

“ I have my ways.” a voice spoke from behind her.

“ Why are you here?” she asked, despite the fact that she tried to come off as harsh, but it was way too shaky to come off as anything but nervous.

“ Can’t a father just come to see his daughter.?”

sorry it took so long to update, i have alot going on right now. I’m working on getting my book published as well as a play, but i hope you enjoy. also this series is coming to a end so if you have any requests that you like me to write, please don’t hesitate to ask.

TAGLIST INFO

@kiribakuslilpebble    @un-limit-edd     @ultrahugakitten  @ jmook423 @ anonymousbabygirl13-blog   @ power-house-fan12                                  @imunderurbed   @fandomfreak1000000   @dylan-kai2008 @cheesecakeva  @lovemegood  @madsttx @whatdidshesayyy

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[scented-morker]

wc. 1.27k, pretty much pure fluff, idol!jake x idol!reader, part of the swifting series but super short so I’m sorry about that… no warnings really

It was getting harder, you realized. Harder to be at the same place as Jake and pretend to be strangers, or at the most friendly colleagues. To see him in interviews and award shows and pretend you don’t kiss away his frowns and hold his hand late into the night.

“Now, yn, there has been a lot of speculation around your romantic life, would you like to comment on that?”

You would like to comment on it, very much so. You’d like to tell them how head over heels you were for your boyfriend and how happy you were with him. You’d also like to comment on how negative comments about you only made him upset and for that reason specifically fans needed to back tf up.

However, the staff behind the camera gave you an almost imperceptible shake of their head and you had to once again give a noncommittal answer.

“I don’t really have anything to say on that front, none of us are under a dating ban anymore so it could happen, but right now I’m just focusing on our wonderful fans and our new album coming out thursday!”

You could tell no one in the room was convinced, and the interviewer actually glared at you for dodging their question, but your manager gave you a thumbs up and you continued on with the interview.

“Why are these interviewers so nosy?” Yeji fumed after the show. “They kept grilling us about personal stuff when we were supposed to talk about the album.”

“I mean it might have to do with the fact that yn and Jake can’t be in the same building without looking like lovesick puppies,” Ryujin started, quickly recovering from your leader's glare, “but still yeah, totally out of line.”

You were about to retaliate, already having the “we literally don-” out of your mouth when you entered your dressing room and spotted Jake on one of the couches.

He immediately perked up, jumping out of his seat to grab you into a hug.

“Babe what are you doing here?” You squeal in surprise, grabbing the sides of his face in your palms.

“I wanted to surprise you, we’re on a break from practice right now and I knew you were here.” He smiles, placing a quick peck on your cheek so as to not break the “No gross PDA” rule your members had made especially for the two of you.

“What was that about not looking like lovesick fools for each other?” Lia giggled as the girls made their way around the room.

“Hey I said we didn’t look like lovesick puppies! Not lovesick fools. We definitely are those.” You admit, and the girls roll their eyes.

“She just spewed some garbage about how she has no romantic life and is focusing on the album. How does that make you feel Jake?” Yuna teased.

“I mean yesterday I almost kissed Sunghoon because the company said rumors about me being gay were better than rumors about me having a girlfriend.” Jake admitted sheepishly, and you couldn’t help but burst out laughing.

“Now how am I supposed to look at him at MusicBank on Friday without thinking about the fact that he almost kissed my boyfriend?”

“Sorry babe, priorities.” He shrugs.

A timer goes off on his phone, and he dejectedly pulls it out.

“I need to leave now, I’m sorry.” He apologizes.

“It’s okay, I get it. Thanks for coming, do good at practice and I’ll call you tonight okay?”

He nods his head before heading to the door, you following closely behind.

“I’m going to kiss my boyfriend now so if you guys don’t want to see, please look away.”

“Hey no pda!” Chaeryeong yells.

“I’m giving you a warning! It’s only public if you watch!” None of them turn away and you glare. “And there will be tongue just to be clear. Very affectionate display-y.”

The girls groan and look away, and Jake just shakes his head. It was truly just going to be an innocent peck, but he understood how much you hated people seeing your intimate moments. Probably another gift the idol life had given you.

Your relationship was your own, and in an industry where nothing is private, it was nice to have some solace, especially in the form of your cute Australian boyfriend and his soft lips.

“Okay, bye for realsies now, I love you.”

“Love you.”

You watch as he pulls his mask and hood on, ducking out of the room and heading towards the side door. You know all of the paparazzi are going to be at the back one waiting for you and your members.

You still find yourself letting out a relieved sigh when he texts you.

No cameras spotted. One guy saw me but he thought I was Jimin from BTS so 🤷🏻‍♀️ we’re all clear, talk to you later <3

“You’re disgusting.”

You can only laugh in response, chucking a throw pillow at Yuna and finally sitting down to get your performance gear removed.

“I hate these award shows!” Jake huffs out for the billionth time.

“Stop saying that, I know you love doing fancy new routines and putting on crazy performances.”

He sighs in defeat.

“Yeah, but I hate having to see you all pretty and impressive and pretend I’m not completely in love with you.”

His words cause heat to rush to your face, and you avoid his eyes as you look down at the tie he has crooked and sticking out weirdly.

Wordlessly, you start fixing the accessory, retying it before smoothing it out and brushing off his shoulders. Jake watches you with fond eyes, loving the domestic-ness of your actions, even if he didn’t forget your lack of response to his previous statement.

When you finish your ministrations on his tie, Jake grabs your wrists in his hands, causing you to look up at him.

“I really mean it. I’m in deep.”

You can’t help but smile, leaning in to press your lips into his, only separating to mumble “I’m head over heels,” before immediately reconnecting, savoring the sweet moment with your lovely boyfriend.

“Okay lovebirds, break it up,” It’s Jay, and you finally pull away from your boyfriend, smiling when he chases your lips. “It’s time to walk.”

Jake pouts as his friend escorts him to their van where they’ll enter the red carpet, your group following shortly after. Close enough that people would remember the rumor of you two dating, but far enough that Jake couldn’t stare at you the entire time, exposing the truth to everyone with eyes.

However, it’s not very worth it when later that night the camera man lands on Jake while you’re performing.

Head to toe dressed in full leather, you send a smirk and a wink at the camera after you perform your piece of the interlude, a fight scene with someone in a mask.

The first notes of Mafia in the Morning play, but the camera is focused on Jake, his mouth hanging open and eyes cloudy as he stares straight at you.

It takes Heeseung elbowing him rather aggressively for your boyfriend to finally close his dropped jaw, zoning back in and realizing what just happened.

“I’m sorry,” he mouths when you walk back to your seats after your performance. He follows it up with a text to your phone.

You just looked too good 🥺

You can’t be mad at the boy, especially after he sends you his big lovesick puppy eyes from his table.

You shake your head before texting back.

It’s fine.. Everyone just might know we’re dating now and surround us like vultures.

His response is almost immediate.

Good thing I know places we can hide.

Such as?

The next one has you giggling like a schoolgirl, and your members all roll their eyes, even if they do have smiles on their faces.

Stairwell, ten minutes.

Also, you’re coming home with me tonight