#I am sane... very much sane and normal about them and about this au

[felix-krain]

witches

[queen0fm0nsterz]

Ong

i've gone from liking the concept of the lady being a parental figure to six(maybe rk too) to wanting to keep her the fuck away from children

[peachmangopie323]

hello! i have originally found u om bkuesky and went to check if u also had an acc here so i could send you an ask but...

Augh rolls on the floor i am absolutely obsessed with your idol amy au!!! the complicated relationship between all the characters, the plotline direction, the art - literally everything about it is perfect and scratches my brain just right!!! ive read all the pages on webtoon in one sitting then made my wife (neither knows anything about sonic nor speaks english) look at it with me too to give her context for me getting on all fours and climbing up the ceiling. which is a normal human reaction to amy being the coolest ever

also i wanted to ask you how do you feel about people drawing fanart and such for your idol amy au?

Oh my!! I'm very glad that you liked my work this much !!! We have the very normal sane reaction to media that scratches our brain !

I hope reading all 500+ pages in one sitting didn't give you a whiplash!! I'd really love to hear more of your feedback because I really want to know if the story is paced decently for a binge reader :DDD

And yesyes! I absolutely love getting fanart and other works based on my AU!! I really really appreciate them !!

[plethomacademia]

wip wed: rockstar/coffee shop/bookstore au

There is an event on the GaleHeart discord for fics about Gale and Shadowheart's first time and instead of being normal or sane and just writing a little thing, I have invented an AU that is somehow both a bookstore (Gale is one of the booksellers) and coffee shop (there's a coffee shop in the bookstore and Shadowheart works there) and a rock band (Shadowheart is in a band with Karlach, Lae'zel, and Wyll) AU all at once.

Anyway! Two snippets. One is Gale showing some rizz and the other is when he first meets Lae'zel. In this universe, Lae'zel and Shadowheart are already dating but it's an open relationship and Shadowheart already has told Lae'zel about wanting to date Gale. Gale is the one who was not sure if Lae'zel truly was ok with it. And this is how he finds out that she is!

She spots him the moment that he reaches to adjust his hair, of course. Her green eyes flick over the top of the book that she is holding with one hand while she leans against the counter on the elbow of the other. Gale notes the couple on the cover of the trade paperback: a woman wearing a bodice that has been loosened and a tall man with long hair and a very open shirt. They’ve sold dozens of copies of the same book in the past week. She is standing by the time he reaches the coffee stand, her open book page down on the counter to hold her place. “You only get one free a day, you know,” she says once he has arrived. “Yes, well, I paid for the last one, so I am aware.” He puts his hands in his pockets, not sure what else to do with them. “What can I say? You are quite talented at what you do.” Jenn gives him a once over and whatever she sees makes the corner of her mouth tick up. “Maybe a decaf this time. We wouldn’t want your heart to burst, Gale.” He swallows. “Yes. Decaf sounds lovely.”

and

Gale is still leaning on the counter when he hears the sounds of at least two pairs of heavy boots behind him. Jenn looks over his shoulder and the glance she gives him is the only warning he gets before a hand claps onto his back. He clenches his jaw to keep from yelping. “Gale of the Bookshop!” he hears. The owner of the voice stands beside him, taking up the remaining space at the counter. Gale moves over a little to give the woman room, using the moment to give her a quick inspected. She has a pleasant face, brown skin with sharp features and a scattering of freckles, all framed by shoulder length brown hair. She is wearing an outfit that suggests she just came from some kind of athletic event or perhaps the gym, a black sports bra visible underneath a white tank top with large dropped armholes. He notices how her muscles bunch as she leans against the counter beside him. She smiles at him and he cannot help but return the gesture. “So, have you fucked my girlfriend yet, Gale of the Bookshop?” she says. Gale feels his cheeks heat as Jenn puts a hand to her mouth to stifle a laugh. As he had expected, this was the woman that Jenn had only referred to as Lae. Her girlfriend, she had told him. One that was apparently ok with the idea of Gale taking Jenn out on a date, something that he had had a hard time believing until this very moment. He glances behind him to see the other person that he heard approach. He is met by glittering brown eyes belonging to a tall Black man. He is just as fit as Lae is, but with much longer hair styled into thick dreadlocks. Another one of Jenn’s bandmates, he presumes, although Gale does not know his name. The man looks over him toward the counter. “Man, Jenn, you know I would fuck you if you just asked,” the man says. He glances back at Gale long enough to wink at him. Gale turns to look back at Jenn, who is shaking her head. “Bullshit,” Jenn says. Now she, too, is looking at Gale. “Wyll wants to be a player but he’s the biggest softie that I know.” She smiles at him. “Present company excluded, perhaps.”

[whimsicallyenchantedrose]

Thanksgiving Reruns 2024--Chapter 3: Black Friday (pt. 1/3)

It’s that time again; the holidays!  I would like to wish all my followers who celebrate it a very happy Thanksgiving.  As a thank you to you (as well as my followers who DON’T celebrate), I present you with 3 Thanksgiving related stories I’ve written in the past.  Enjoy!

Title: Black Friday—Chapter 1 of 3

Rating: G

Words: 1442

Summary: CS as single parents AU. As the holidays approach, Emma’s son Henry and Killian’s daughter Alice ask for a specific storybook which will ONLY be available for purchase on Black Friday.

 Other Chapters: 1 2 4 5

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Black Friday—Chapter 1

One week before Thanksgiving

“Do you really think it’ll work?” she asked, leaning forward, eyes bright and delighted.

“It’s perfect!” he answered. “Trust me!  Our plan will work like a charm.  Just make sure you give him Miss French’s flier and make him see how much you want it.  I’ll do the same with her.  By Christmas, we’ll be celebrating our success.”

She grinned.  “Oh, I hope you’re right!  Can you imagine?  If we pull this off, everything will change forever!”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The morning after Thanksgiving

The alarm clock roared to life as a way, way too enthusiastic version of Jingle Bell Rock blared from the speakers of her clock radio. Emma groaned, reaching blindly over to slam the button on the top of the alarm and make the noise stop.

3 am.  It was entirely too early for any sane person to be awake.  Even the early birds were still peacefully snoozing in their nests.  It was only the crazy humans, intent on getting the best deals on the best Christmas gifts who would submit themselves to this kind of torture.

She hoped the payout was worth it.

Her bed was so warm, so comfortable, that for a split second, Emma considered just forgetting about the whole thing and going back to sleep, but then she thought about Henry.

It had been a difficult year for him, for both of them really.  They’d had a great life in New York.  Her bail bonds gig had paid well enough that they could afford a wonderful apartment. Henry had lots of friends at school.  She’d had a guy she loved, a guy she really thought was the one.  He’d seemed great with Henry, and Henry had really liked him.  

Walsh had proposed a week before Halloween, and Emma had really considered saying yes.  Granted, she didn’t feel the epic, sweeping, melt-into-a-pile-of-goo passion you see in movies, but she did love Walsh, and he could be a wonderful addition to the little family circle she and Henry had put together.

At least that’s what she thought.

Emma had made up her mind to accept the proposal when it all went south.  Turns out Walsh wasn’t at all who he said he was.  He’d been playing a long con on her, doing his level best to steal her money and assets right from under her nose, and she felt like a fool for buying into it his b.s.  She was smarter than this!  She ran the honey trap on bail jumpers; she knew the playbook.  How did she fall for it?

She’d just so badly wanted that perfect, white-picket-fence life for herself, and especially for her ten-year-old son, that’s how.

After everything had so epically crashed and burned with Walsh, Emma had just wanted to get away.  She’d wanted–needed–a new start, and so when her brother David had mentioned the opening for a deputy in the tiny town of Storybrooke, Maine, where he lived with his wife Mary Margaret, Emma had jumped at the opportunity.

Within a week, she’d uprooted her whole life–and her son’s whole life–and moved to Storybrooke.  For the moment, she and Henry were crashing with David and Mary Margaret in their tiny loft apartment until Emma could find them their own place.

The move had been the most difficult on Henry.  All he’d ever known was back in New York–friends, school, entire lifestyle.  Small town Storybrooke was like a totally different world than the booming metropolis he was used to.  Her normally happy, vivacious kid had been quiet, almost withdrawn since they’d arrived in Storybrooke.

Emma knew kids were resilient, that Henry would bounce back, but she felt so damn guilty for causing him stress.

And so, naturally when Henry had come home a week ago, excitement bumped up to a level ten, talking a mile a minute and waving a flier in her face, Emma had taken notice.  Turns out the school librarian Belle French–who was also the owner and proprietor of “A Tale as Old as Time”, Storybrooke’s best (and only) bookstore–was holding a special Black Friday sale on a very special storybook, entitled Once Upon a Time.  She had one copy, and one copy only, and the rare book would normally sell for an exorbitant price–somewhere between an arm and a leg.  On Black Friday, however, she was offering the book for dirt cheap, but there was a catch.  The price was only good during the special, Black Friday early bird sale.  Doors opened at 4 am.   First person to touch the book had the opportunity to purchase it.

Henry had always loved stories, and he’d been particularly fascinated with fairy tales.  Naturally, a book chalk full of them would be right up Henry’s alley.  Faced with the prospect of getting Henry the perfect gift, the gift that would finally bring him some joy after the difficult last few weeks, it was a no brainer.

Waking up a few hours before the crack of dawn was a small price to pay for her kid’s happiness.

Emma pushed aside the covers and got up, throwing on the first pair of clean clothes she could find, twisting her hair into a messy bun, and then downing the strong coffee her sister-in-law had set to brew for her.  By the end of her second cup, she was feeling almost human, and she was ready to brave the hordes of Black Friday shoppers to attain her prize.

It was a quick, five minute walk to the center of town where “A Tale as Old as Time” was located, and Emma made it just as the cheerful brunette proprietor was unlocking the doors and letting her first customers in.  Emma knew just where her target was.  She’d scoped out the bookstore over the weekend, getting the lay of the land and mapping out her plan of attack.  She knew just where to go, and within sixty seconds of the store opening, she’d reached her target.  It was right there, in sight.

Emma reached for the book, her hand made contact–just as another hand did as well.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Killian Jones had lived a difficult life.  He’d seen more heartache and tragedy in his thirty-five years of existence than most people did in a lifetime.  Aye, it had been an incredibly difficult life, but it did have one bright, shining spot.

His daughter Alice.

His one-night-stand with Alice’s mom, Eloise, had been a mistake of epic proportions, but Killian would never regret it, because it gave him the greatest blessing of his life, his precious little starfish.

Nine months after their dalliance, Eloise had suddenly showed up on his doorstep, placed their newborn daughter in his arms, and then walked out of their lives forever.  For himself, Killian couldn’t have cared less.  He felt nothing but revulsion for the woman who’d gotten him blind drunk and then taken advantage of him that night nine months ago.  In the bright morning light, he’d been disgusted with her, with himself, and with the entire sordid affair.  He’d have been more than happy if he never saw her noisome face again.

No, he didn’t care if she walked away from him, but his heart had broken at the fact that his tiny, perfect daughter had been abandoned by her mother.  Killian knew from first hand the agony of being abandoned by a parent, and it tore him up inside that his beloved daughter had to deal with it as well.

Though having a child was the farthest thing from his mind at the time, there’d never been any doubt what he would do.  Alice was his daughter, his precious child, and he would do right by her no matter what.

Ten years later, he thanked his lucky stars every single day that he’d made the choice to raise her.  Alice was the most important person in the world to him, and there was nothing he wouldn’t do for her.

So naturally, when she came home from school all excited about the book Miss French was selling, Killian knew exactly how he would be spending his very early Black Friday morning.

He’d arrived at “Tale as Old as Time” just as Miss French opened the doors.  He rushed to the back of the store, his prize in sight.

He grabbed the book just as a gorgeous blonde made contact.  

“Um excuse me,” she said with a frown.  “This book is mine.”

It appeared this shopping expedition was going to be more difficult–although possibly more intriguing–the blonde truly was breathtaking–than he’d expected.

Killian grinned.  He’d never backed down from a challenge, and he didn’t intend to begin now.

Next Chapter–>

[atla-confessions]

I am a writer, and it’s normal for me to “hallucinate” about characters or scenes from my works in my free time. I often come up with new ideas spontaneously. But recently there’s one “vision” that bothers me. It’s dark; and Azula is crying in someone’s embrace. She’s distressed and feels like. really bad (my english vocabulary is as great as… um… whatever), but the embrace is soft and comforting, and eventually cries fade out. Azula calms down and maybe falls asleep, tired. The entire scene is very emotional and makes me feel things, my heart breaks every time at the thought of Azula crying. My poor little girl :’(

I really want to turn this idea into a drabble or something because it literally haunts me! But there’s a thing—I don’t who the other person is. I know who it isn’t:

It isn’t someone from gaang

It isn’t someone from her family

It isn’t Mai or Ty Lee (they betrayed her, why would they comfort her)(the scene is post-canon btw)

(For some reason) It isn’t my oc that I created for the only purpose of comforting Azula. It doesn’t feel like that.

It isn’t me. I wish I was there, but nope, it’s not me

I have two AUs where Azula has a (good) father figure and a (good) older brother respectively. In the scene, the other person isn’t either of them.

So who. Who is that other person. Who is comforting Azula. I need to know. Like I’m sane but this thing haunts me. I want to comfort Azula so so much when she appears crying in my head, it’s painful. I need to know who the other person is. And also I need context for this scene, maybe it’s a part of a story. Maybe someone who reads this has an idea, please share it in replies/reblogs, I’m paying (i wish i could say “millions” but no) kudos to whoever helps me. Thanks. Thanks for reading this thing, I really needed to talk it out.

To the admin: get well soon! Wish you all best. Thank you for this blog! 🧡

X

[runawaymun]

Hi so I just binged your fics and adore them, I love “kids get sane adults and overcome trauma and feel safe” fics

And I was wondering if it was inspired by any other fics you could recommend? Especially Tolkien

aaa I'm so glad you like them! thank you!

The adoptive family trope is a trope that is incredibly near and dear to my heart and weirdly underexplored in the LOTR fandom tbqh. You'd think there would be more of it. I get this question a lot and unfortunately I must repeat that my toxic trait is that I am incredibly picky when it comes to the fics I read, and that And the Stars Shine the Same was actually started in a blind rage after scouring the internet for anything like it, and finding that most of them over-simplified the healing process or grossly mischaracterized Elrond OR turned out to be romantic in the end (but like not in a good way). So unfortunately I have very few fics I can recommend.

In terms of well-written fic that you might like if you like my work, as always, I recommend pretty much anything @jaz-the-bard has written when it comes to Elrond & kidnap fam adjacent material (and just...good fic...in general...hngg). @potatoobsessed999 (potatoesanddreams on AO3) has some really lovely genfic, and I literally cannot recommend @idrilsscribe's Under Strange Stars series enough. The Ever-Fixed Star series is an incredible set of Elrond-adjacent (but mostly Feanorian-centric) fics by @eirianerisdar that deal with themes of forgiveness, family, redemption, and healing and they remain just about some of my favorite fics of all time <3 I also will continue to endlessly rec @thatfeanorian's All the Ways to Love which is not gen, but does include just really excellent Russingon slowburn trauma recovery re: Feanor is The Worst Dad Ever and Maedhros' self-esteem is a dumpster fire, and Fingon is Best Boy (of course!).

For other fandoms I recently blitzed through I've Been Holding Back Tears (While You're Throwing Back Beers) by im_your_mom_now which is just unabashed Peter Parker AU whump with Tony being a very worried and concerned adult (trying to be a worried and concerned adoptive dad but of course it's Tony and he's emotionally constipated so he's not going to outright admit that he feels like Peter is his son which is just CHEFS KISS) It's actually incredibly well written -- like I don't normally go for Marvel anything but I just couldn't resist. It hit all my sweet spots for me and I really am a softie for Dad!Tony with Peter. <3 It's incredibly anti aunt-May though, fair warning.

Yeah that's mostly what I have for you! If any of my followers wants to chime in -- as always drop your recs on this post for anon :)

[rowavolo]

i am offering you a leaf as both a thank you and a preemptive apology. it's me again and i'm so normal about lucifer obey me /lie

he's the guy ever. hitting him with The Beam. the entire scene where we make a pact with him is…. “i can’t have you lumping me together with everyone else. that won’t do.” going crazy. if you hug him after he says "this is good enough for now" and i'm supposed to be SANE??? he cares so much for his family, he literally broke his core ideals to protect them (technically an hc but i’m correct about it). he notices so much about the people he cares for—he could tell the bottle of golden syrup was empty before levi did without ever touching it himself. his gift was a brooch that "caught our eye." he cried when we had to leave, and- “after you went back to the human world, did you ever think of me? not of my brothers, but me? tell me you did. tell me that i’ve been on your mind since the day you left. i don’t think i could handle it otherwise.” what else can you want in a man!!!! catastrophically unwell. would you believe me if i said this was half the original length of my talk about him because it is.

yearning aside, your vision of the celestial realm is clicking in place in my head like a lego brick, especially the tower design. very interested in the metal caste system you mentioned, and i am also Staring at your s/i’s lore. i’m a sucker for heaven/holy beings turning out to be bad/oppressive. an outcast from heaven finding a safe space in hell? in an arranged marriage on top of that? putting him in the microwave to watch him spin on the dish.

— blue anon (<- for no. particular reason /silly)

omg please PLEASE there is no need to apologise at all, I really enjoyed reading this and i feel like you summarised a lot of what i like about his character too! I feel like his individualism and want to be seen as separate to his brothers is a really integral part of his character, but hes also so intertwined with his role of looking after his brothers (insert some ramble about him being like someone in the parentified eldest daughter role) ANYWAYS im shaking you thank you so much for this big ramble and i would absolutely believe that theres more to this because its just like !! raah i can just feel the vibe and it's just !! im really happy you shared it with me because i liked reading it so much !!

ALSO thank you, i had so much fun working on this sort of original angel-inspired species a few years ago and im glad to be able to reuse some aspects of it in a way that im able to interact with and write about tangibly!!

AND THANK YOU i just vibe SO MUCH with this particular s/i, theres something so special about his vibe, and his arc of slowly realising that maybe the way he grew up wasnt so healthy after all and eventually settling into this space full of other outcasts (and i feel like a lot of the way you see Lucifer is displayed in how he is with my s/i in this particular AU (and the alternative version of it, in which my s/i was another 'brother', but one that fell for michaels manipulation and stayed behind in heaven)).

Like, the whole trope of finding a group that's like... theyre not just like you, but the way that theyre different from the others is compatible with the way that you are. youre playing different songs on the same wavelength. if that makes sense.

just something about my s/i finding that and learning to be at home and happy with it all

[azumasoroshi]

going fucking insane over one of my wips because it's for a really small subgroup of a really small fandom of a really small fandom of a really big fandom that everyone fucking hates because people are cancelled like every other week and basically i cant talk about it with anyone without needing to explain like 60 pages worth of story that I wrote PLUS no one wants to talk about me because it's one of the cringiest ships in existence that sounds HORRENDOUSLY heteronormative on paper and like half the fandom calls them siblings even though they have been confirmed multiple times not to be and the other half is like oh the girl would never be in love with the guy because she's in love with the player!! as if being in love with her ideal of the player is healthy for her all and can't change or she can't fall out of love with someone whose interactions were limited to basically just looking at her, clicking through her text and DELETING HER

yeah so is about monipai as in monika from ddlc and senpai from friday fucking night funkin (i know. im sorry) im so down horrendous im on like seventeen doses of copium and counting and there's 11 total monipai works on ao3

one of them is mine and the other ones are either written by a 10 year old (because it's fucking fnf, what sane adult would write unironic fnf fanfiction) or unfinished (because fnf fics get no traction and unless you're fucking insane like me and have 60 pages of pure brainrot there is NOTHING keeping you going for such a nonexistent audience) and oh my god why am i here

the other fandoms ive been in recently are vashwood and shizaya and those are great!! those are normal!! vashwood has been getting boatloads of content that i cant stop looking at/reading and im getting fun ideas for aus and there's so many people in the community rn to interact with

and shizaya is a bit of struggle because the fandom is smaller but there's so much older content to go through/reread that it's fine and my posts about them get some traction and in some places you can actually talk to people who have been in the fandom from the beginning of time and overall it's a good fun time

AND THEN THERE'S MONIPAI. the ONE straight (bi4bi according to me and im always right) ship in fnf that no one likes because they're "sibling coded" for some god forsaken reason (and im usually all for sibling headcanons/prefer them over romantic ones but NOT THIS ONE SENPAI LITERALLY CONFESSED HIS LOVE FOR HER IN THE MOD) and it'll only make sense to people who like DDTO enough to not forget about it after playing like 19832529 other mods and even THEN like half of them ship it in the really cringe heteronormative way that dudebros ship them like GOD FUCKING HELL GET ME OUT OF HERE

ive never been madder about anything ive shipped ever. i LOVE getting comments on my fic and im surprised ive gotten any at all but holy shit

you know that one person who made like 3000 fics for their honeyworks throuple. honey i feel you cuz what the fuck is this

and with my usual ships i can send them to my friends who know what to expect and be like ok so these are the gayasses you're obsessed with this week but with this one. like the very premise is so ridiculous id be laughed out of their dms but this is literally like the most in-depth and serious ive gotten about any of my fanfiction plots ever (there's like themes and callbacks and motifs and everything, thats how you know it's bad). this is probably better written than my book drafts and it makes me SO MAD

ive even considered like. what if i just made them my ocs, since i've developed them so much and the plot is entirely my own creation. that might even be easier but the fic is so heavily based off of canon content that it just wouldntd make SENSE how am i supposed to rewrite all that canon lore when i take them out of it. i cant. im stuck tying them to ddtoverse

back to what i was originally talking about: basically i got this really nice comment on ao3 on my monipai fic and i was smiling really hard and spinning in my chair and i was inspired to try and write again so i update my. oh it's 71 pages. 71 page document to try and update chapter 3 and i end up going to my other ideas and workshopping them and suddenly ive penned down ideas for 4 DIFFERENT CLIMAXES?????????? AND THEY ALL HAVE THEIR PROS AND CONS AND THEY ALL BASICALLY LEAD TO THE SAME ENDNIG AND I DONT KNOW WHICH ONE TO CHOOSE AND I CANT ASK ANYONE BECAUSE IF THEY'RE INTERESTED ENOUGH TO READ IT I WANT THEM TO READ THE FIC AS IT'S BEING UPDATED BUT NO ONE'S INTERESTED ANYWAY

and trying to ask about which one i should choose while removing all incriminating details (read: monika and senpai's names) is so hard because there's SO much i have to explain as backstory and no one even responds to it anyway so there's no point :sob:

anyway i love monipai and specifically my version of monipai and it's legitmately ruining my life how's your day going

[amporella]

hi! this is mpreg anon from a few months back lol. i just wanted to say i finally got to reading the fic and im sooo!!!!! sobbing and crying, a puddle of love on the floor! you were right. i Know now why you talked about it often.

i really love holly's stankyle. theres something about them that feels very.. desperate? like they know they belong together and sometimes not even physical touch can satiate that need/want?? idk! but agh! i love them sm. holly is also really good at capturing the overall weirdness of south park and thats why she can come up with aus/ideas that are weird or silly and make them work. i also really appreciate that she went for kinks/tropes that not many people give style.

something else i really loved about this fic was that it felt very like.. omg a dream come true in a way? sometimes i just wanna read a fic where stan and kyle do fuck all all day, just real type of normal maybe even domestic shit and its just them. and this fic came pretty close to that? they are so wrapped up in each other and have so much love to give and g OD i thought the baby was gonna come in and ruin that or like i was gonna get annoyed w the baby but no!!! 😭 i was so neutral about elway in the beginning and was actually loving how kyle was thinking/approaching the whole thing. idek when that started changing?? before they talk about the name elway though. and when she was finally born and the days kyle spent fighting to get her?!! and then he gets her and its the three of them and its like.. yeah.. okay, she's perfect. she really is a miracle stan and kyle created and theres no way she could ever come between them bc stan and kyle's love is endless, its forever and ever, they can share that love with their child 🤧

as for creek, hmm. i think craig and tweek just arent characters i've seen holly write for and like? so even though they are/were together i just didnt rly care for them u_u. im really glad i started finally reading fic where theyre not together in style fics though. it still hurts a bit lmao but ive been enjoying some stories i had passed on before and stuff and yeah, ty for giving me that little push >w<!!!

sorry this ask is so long! i didnt want to bother you every time i finished a chapter lol. i was also going through some stuff and this fic was the only thing keeping me sane. and actually i have just the epilogue left but im so sad its gonna be over after that so i've been delaying it :(! but yeah, aahhhh herbert garrison's night school for unwed fathers enjoyer 🫡 TY! 💙💚

YOU HAVE NOOOO IDEA HOW HAPPY I AM THAT YOU READ THE FIC AND SENT ME THIS AMAZING ASK??? I saw this in my inbox and immediately went to my friends and like BRAGGED ABOUT GETTING THIS? I'm going to respond to every part so bear with me but in the meantime THANK YOU!!!

I think you are so so right about them being desperate... it is key for stanky that regardless of how close they get physically, it's like it'll never be enough? Like they are soulmates in every sense of the word, and can never actually satiate their pull... SIGH!!!! IT'S TRUE!!! And holly's ability to nail absurdity is absolutely one of her strongest suits, and something that definitely contributed to how iconic she is. South Park is an absurd show, and holly meets it with such absurdity that Stan and Kyle can stay perfectly in character, because so many of her plots are something that could legitimately BE a South Park episode involving the characters when they're older. Like, Craig and Clyde fucking in the Marsh shed and Craig telling Sheila Kyle needs a psych eval? A+, can and will happen at some point. It's so ridiculous yet somehow believable, and the mpreg fic is literally the BEST example of it. It's a concept that's frankly a huge turnoff for a lot of people (understandably), but she puts it in such a light that she makes it appealing for a ton of people. It's one of those fics that i would recommend even to the most vehement mpreg hater, because there IS something about it that differentiates it from typical fics like that.

AND DESCRIBING IT AS A DREAM COME TRUE IS SO CORRECT? Everything you said in that third paragraph specifically was so fucking real. The fic starts off as such an absolute disaster situation, and despite the multiple disasters along the way, you can absolutely tell that it was like fate in a way? Holly does an incredible job of balancing the understandable stress with the joy and all the happy moments, as well as acknowledging the fact that in the end, Elway seriously did enrich both of their lives. I LOVE THAT YOU POINTED OUT HOW YOU WERE WORRIED ABOUT THE BABY COMING BETWEEN THEM... because it's true!!! It's such a real concern, but she is so good about wrapping it up; the scenes after Kyle gets Elway feel like a dream sequence in how floaty and happy everyone is, and while reading it I was like (as someone who does not want kids), huh. Maybe I need to have a baby? LOLL but seriously you are so right. It IS endless and now they have even more love to go around because of Elway... whatever. WHATEVER!! I'm not even crying. I'm NORMAL!!!!

I totally get your feelings about creek!! I ended up feeling kind of similarly. I'm happy you started expanding your horizons!!! There's nothing wrong with sticking with exclusively creek fic, obv, but there are some real gems out there if you're able to push some of the icks to the side. And maybe you'll even figure out a new ship you like? I remember that I was afraid to read Other People's Tupperware at first because Tweek is literally dead, and Craig hooks up with Kenny? But then I decided to read it (and felt neutral about it!) and it was valuable to me. And then when I read it a few years later, I really loved it. It got me thinking that first time!!! I'M HAPPY I COULD HELP GIVE YOU THAT PUSH!!!

Talking about holly (or any other fic) to me will NEVER bother me so pls feel free to do so!!!! I HOPE YOU ENJOY THE EPILOGUE!! It is sweet and so delightful. AND PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF I CAN EVER GIVE YOU ANY OTHER SUGGESTIONS!!

Thank you SOO much for this ask!! It seriously made my day.

[moonfurthetemmie]

So i did the rest of the important people

by the way it's a tragedy that tumblr only has a handful of text colors because i can't pull this shit here

anyways. long post. And I did decide to have Antonio be deaf and Bea blind.

For most of them, I changed their body proportions at least a little from the saved AU versions I copied from (so i didn't have to completely create them from fucking scratch again). Bea became a little taller and skinnier. Antonio got taller and bulkier. Lodo may not have changed height but i think i gave them a little more weight. don't remember how i changed bella or sforza. Francisco got his posture fixed, and then I manually made him hunch over so even if you'd seen melon you wouldn't know HJKGDFSHJKG

Isabella ('Bella')

Waow…..scary lady….crazy scary lady even….

Is she better at pretending to be sane? Do Petruccio and Gonzalo care less about appearing sane? Who knows. If you ask they’ll all just laugh and change the subject. 

She appears to be equally close with Gonzalo and Petruccio, though at times it’s unclear if they’re friends or if it’s just the bosses and their most loyal minion. They’ll tell you they’re all friends

Girlfam still isn’t as excited about the theater bullshit as Gonzalo and Petruccio, but she is having fun. Her persona for missions is “a heavily scarred” storm-bringer. Since she can’t actually summon storms she can only go in-character where there are storms, but it’s. Not that hard to find somewhere having a thunderstorm. Especially when you have access to countless alternate universes. 

Her staff isn’t magic; she just conducts her own magic through it. Because its metal. 

All the Koroit alternates I’ve had a hand in making (except for Elphaba) have different colored hair tips. Bella’s is dark blue because Yes. Also Bella's hair is like...mid-back length? and a bit of it is pulled back into a braid but not ALL of it

Ironically she does have a lot of scars. It’s just that very few of them are on her face. Petruccio and Gonzalo did it (serious)

im not super thrilled with the costume but it's what i got right now. and since i had Elphaba's theme be based on the strings, I wanted Bella's theme be the lightning. i also thought that maybe she ought not to be all black clothes for both outfits. idk. just a thought.

The “enhancement” she was given was an expanded reservoir of magic. She can use a lot more magic, and for much longer, than normal Koroit can. If she’s not careful about it, though, she could be seriously injured because of this. It’s possible she could stop her own heart from channeling too much of her lightning magic. Her strings are also much stronger and more durable.

Antonio

“What would be an effective palette change to make it seem like it’s not the monochrome guy?” 

“RAINBOW”

As far as the outside world is concerned, he’s colorblind. He's not actually, but the colors were so jarring that I thought it'd be funny if he was like "I am NOT wearing that. Oh my god. I know I only wear black and white but jesus christ my fashion sense isn't THAT bad" and Gonzalo and/or Petruccio made a joke about thinking he was colorblind because he only wore black and white. and then he didn't get or make a better costume so he just started spreading a rumor that he was completely colorblind

You see that little tattoo poking out from under his hoodie sleeve? See how it’s also fully covered up by the rainbow costume? If you’re ever gonna go out and do something you might get in deep shit for cover up all scars and tattoos that can be used to identify you. Which is everything. Cover them up

Having said that you may note i forgot one of his face scars.

It’s more obvious on the chest piece, but every piece in the rainbow costume has a lil bit of that deep bloo

He is deaf. For the same reason that Bea is now blind. That being, Petruccio and Gonzalo wanted to try and make it easier for them to ‘hear’ Yighraru. Since it doesn’t speak the way the rest of them do, it does sort of work. He can sometimes hear it trying to whisper to him. The only problem is that Antonio, for reasons unknown, seems oddly resistant to its influence. It’s definitely helping that he’s avoiding those two (and bella) as often as he can, though.

Bella does not like being avoided and he doesn’t usually succeed with her

The “enhancement” he was given was mainly just increasing his physical strength beyond what a regular mortal should be capable of. Antonio doesn’t know the details of how they did it, and he doesn’t want to.

Beatrice ('Bea')

oh she’s SO !!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry the fox ninja thing is. It’s doing things to my heart

Come a little closer don’t worry about the wolverine claws ahahahah

The black + blue hair is part of the costume. A Wig

While she can no longer see, her hearing has greatly improved. Some of it is less ‘improvement’ and more ‘she has to rely on it more so she hears more things that she didn’t notice before’, but most of it is the hearing aids they gave her so “she could still be useful”. She didn’t deal with the loss of her sight well so she relied on the hearing aids a lot. They’re not that loud, but they are pretty sensitive. She has to turn them down some during missions, or take them out completely, but by now she’s gotten used to having them out and functioning without them. She still definitely prefers hearing more things though. As an added bonus no one can sneak up on her now

Why get white cane when simply wear metal-toed boots to keep from stubbing the shit out of your toes (she says, walking barefoot around the house 90% of the time for Minimum Noise From Self)

Tbf tho bare feet very good for feeling around. Having said that GIRL what about GLASS! This is like 50% of the reason Lodovico goes around with you everywhere girl!!!!!!!!! Your feet!!!!!! Are gonna get sliced!!!!! All to hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyways. Her entire Casual Outfit is meant to minimize the amount of noise she herself makes with the exception of Scarf and Hanging Belts. The scarf is sentimental value. The belts make just enough noise for her to know wear she is. Pretty much just echolocation on a human level. If she needs more noise she just does the click click click thing with her tongue. 

Also as a point of pure spite, any time Gonzalo or Petruccio say ‘look’ she makes That Face and goes “seriously? You’re asking me to look after what you did?”

They seem to be amused by this. She’s absolutely terrified of pissing them off, but it’s pretty hard to without hurting them or talking shit about one/both of them or Yighraru. 

She is unaware of the color change in her eyes, or the fact that the scars from what they did are glowing.

“Wait, how can she and Lodo communicate if Lodo can only use sign language and Bea’s blind?” do it in her hand. Seriously. They do the signs against Bea’s hands. I saw them do it on the tv (serious, but said jokingly because seeing something on a tv show doesn't mean it's accurate to real life). It might work a little differently than normal sign language but on god they’ll figure it out

Also the um. The tattoos. So like I have this AU with a whole ass pantheon of gods that I made up? And I made the mistake of being like ‘ok for this one specific story, Paraiba comes from that world and those are her gods’ and then it just. Permanently stuck. So those tattoos are meant to be symbolic of the god of darkness, trickery, and activity; who’s also the god of the moon. they’re not evil they’re just. Kind of chaotic. Look i saw moon tattoos and monkey brain went IDEA

The “enhancement” she was given was mainly speed. This is the biggest reason her persona ended up being a sneaky foxy thing. She can sneak around very quickly, and that means she’s very valuable for gathering information and sowing chaos through a crowd.

Lodovico ('Lodo')

Petruccio and Gonzalo decided to see if they could make it so Yighraru could speak through Lodo. They failed. But Lodo can feel Yighraru more than the others–save for Petruccio, Gonzalo, and Bella–can. No one’s ever said anything, but Lodo just. Knows. What limited use their vocal cords did have is now completely gone because of this “operation.”

As Petruccio and Gonzalo so very much wanted Yighraru to speak to them through a more corporeal form, they put much more effort into it than they did with the other three. As an unintended consequence of this, Lodo has quite a bit of their magic in them. A little like how normal Obsidian used his corruption to put a magic tracker on everyone, but they didn’t even know they could do that. After accidentally doing to Lodo, they decided to try it on everyone else. Lodo is the only one that has a visible mark on their skin from it, though. 

Their hair in the costume is their real hair, it’s just a spray-on hair dye. Also they took the cornrows out and fluffed their hair up to a full afro.

Her theme is “wasteland survivor”. Used to hardship, ruthless and lethal from years trying to get by even just one more day. She never speaks, and it’s left unclear whether she can or not. 

The team has worked out various signals for Bea and Lodo. Specifically how Lodo can signal the others without signing, and how they can all signal to Bea with some form of nonverbal noise. Bea and Lodo have a few specific ones between the two of them that the rest of the team hasn’t even fully figured out.

Note that they tried to cover up the markings from Petruccio and Gonzalo’s magic, but some of it is still peeking through.

the knife. in the first one. there's a vague thought of 'old keepsake' and 'They Are Considering Murder' but beyond that it's...it's mostly that I needed them to hold something and i thought it'd be cool to try and make it look like they were unsheathing it. I can! when her arms are higher up. it got wonky trying to lower them tho and i decided that proof of concept wasn't as important as having a non-awkward pose.

Originally she wasn’t going to get an enhancement, but after Bea taught her how to fight and the pair became best friends, Petruccio and Gonzalo decided Lodo should at least be able to keep up with Bea. The two spirits don’t realize that Bea and Lodo’s relationship is not anywhere near the same levels of toxic codependency as theirs. Lodo and Bea decide that complaining is probably a bad idea

Francisco

i. i made the most beautiful brown eyes i've ever seen in heroforge. oh my god. And hten i had to make them ORANGE

My boy is NOT having a good time. But honestly who would be

He’s probably the closest, aside from Sforza and Bella, to figuring out why, exactly, Petruccio and Gonzalo are doing all this shit to the team. Because they haven’t actually said anything to anyone. Bella pissed them off so she got a whole speech about it from them, and since she’s now 100% with them they tell her way, way more than they do anyone else. Sforza was plot-dumped on too. Also he can hear The Whispers so there’s that.

The only piece missing, for Francisco, is what the FUCK that blue shit is coming from. It’s not Petruccio and Gonzalo. The blue came after their wounds scarred over. Like, okay, he’s heard the crazy three talking about “Yighraru”, but that doesn’t mean shit to him. Is it a person? A group of people? Some kind of supernatural entity?? He has no idea. 

He’s been spared from Gonzalo and Petruccio’s little experiments, but they do try to mess with his head a lot. Usually he tells them to buzz off unless they want to unsettle him so bad he fucks up his job and someone dies, and usually it works.

Sortino

He didn’t get any enhancements, but they did consider it. They just couldn’t think of anything that’d actually be useful; for them or for him. Beyond stretchy limbs so he can get to high-up places for cleaning without a ladder or something, which they didn’t (and still don’t) think they could do.

Much like with Icarus, Sortino comes down regularly to bring Sforza food. Gonzalo and Petruccio don’t want him to starve before they can make him Yighraru’s vessel <33

Sortino knows that Sforza’s being prepared for some kind of ritual, but beyond that knows nothing. He stays with him while he eats, just to give him some company and talk to him. He’s the only reason Sforza stayed sane for as long as he has.

He’s told even less about shit that even Francisco is, but he doesn’t want to know. He’d rather keep his head down, do his job, and get their attention off of him. Maybe he can find a way to get himself and Sforza out of here

Sforza

While they are committing inhumane atrocities on him, Petruccio and Gonzalo think Sforza at least deserves some clothes, so he got a nice robe and pants and even some shoes

Some of the glowing things on his body are scars. Some are either tattoos or paint. All of the ones that are glowing (the only set not glowing is unseen, but it’s top surgery scars) were made by Gonzalo and/or Petruccio. 

He’s still with it, but his sanity is holding on by a fucking thread. Much more, and…

Sometimes, for seemingly no reason, he gets really freaked out and starts saying stuff that Sortino absolutely doesn’t understand. He understands “The whispers are back” but that’s about it. 

Also while they gave him clothes it’s. Literally just that one set. 

[teecupangel]

From @siofreed

lol poor poor Des. Bet Malik finally giving in would be glorious XD

Oh, most definitely lollol

Tags from @allegedlyrainy

#assassin's creed #several very awkward bonding trips later‚ usual plot shenanigans determining what becomes of the assassins and the brotherhood at large… #altaïr has figured out how to communicate with desmond. altaïr has also gotten... attached. (desmond was already attached.) #he is also an even greater force to be reckoned with while he has desmond backing him up. (much to malik's exasperation I'm sure.) #kadar is intrigued. very possibly too intrigued. kadar gets many ideas one could consider terrible in the face of desmond's everything #no one is surprised when he gets his way. everyone is surprised when they also join him in what should probably be considered insanity #maria wants to hate desmond. wants to hate all of them. tries to find what she has in common with these men that he also won't kill - #and is finding it harder to continue to hate them so. even the damned beast. #one could even say he was... sweet‚ if they could manage to forget just how dangerous he was. #and then finally... “malik! you were supposed to be the reasonable one!” malik's common sense has gone on leave. try again later. #(sorry desmond. you're both not winning and absolutely winning here‚ idk what to tell you.) #also also omg. chimera cuddle pile!

I’m just imagining this to be a crazy, full of detours due to being with Desmond, road trip. It only takes perhaps a few days from Jerusalem to Masyaf. The detours are long enough that they’ve been on (and off) the road for a month or so.

It would be funny though if Desmond speedruns accidentally making his harem and Malik’s common sense left the area just a day or two. XD

The true voice of reason is Maria and she’s too busy being surprised by the amount of shenanigans these idiots could get to.

Tags from @noficbyhalves

#...should i be sorry about what i unleashed? fuck it we ball #tbh i was more thinking malmar #but like either way malik is going to be dragged kicking and screaming into this by his own libido #as he should be regardless of au tbh #its just a question of the severity of the kicking and screaming #the chimera polycule makes dating a templar look sane and normal #brand new sentence right there #desmond: i am going to choose not to think about the timeline consequences of any of this #assassins creed #malik al sayf #altaïr ibn la'ahad #desmond miles #i ship desmond miles with being alive #kadar al sayf #maria thorpe

(No need to be sorry. This kind of chaos is what I live for lollol)

Malik thinking that the best course of action to not be included in the chimera polycule is to have sex with a woman is so funny. Like, the man would go through a lot of logical hoops, making mental acrobatic moves that a gymnast would be jealous of, just to reach the conclusion that what he needs is a woman to love.

Maria is offended but, at the same time, would rather bang Malik than admit that she also does, in need, want some chimera dick.

Two repressed adults trying their best to ignore their blossoming monster fucker kink.

A tragedy waiting to happen lollol.

Submitted by @saberamane

All these ‘Desmond as …’ asks with him as dangerous animals. This would be his reaction to a Templar trying to move him from somewhere. Or an Assassin he didn’t like…

=====================================

short snippet by teecup

I made it vague what kind of animal/creature Desmond in this one so if you want him to be Mr. Tunnel Fluffball, go ahead XD

.

.

“My lord… the excavation team cannot proceed with digging deeper underneath the temple.”

Maria stood quietly as Robert glared at the poor messenger who had the misfortune of informing Robert of the unfortunate news.

“What’s the problem now? We already paid off everyone to let us dig in peace and to stay quiet. This should not have gotten to Saladin’s ears.” Robert growled.

“It’s not… it’s not the Saracens, sire.” The poor messenger gripped his hat tight enough to crumple it as he tried to explain, “They… they say that the only route we can take is blocked.”

“Blocked?”

“Yes, sire.”

“And they can’t just dig around the blockage?”

“No, sire.” The poor messenger shook his head and Maria wondered if the messenger was already saying a silent prayer in fear, “They say that this is the only route. Any other places would weaken the foundation and we risk the temple collapsing above us.”

Robert was not a brute.

He was quite a reasonable man.

A wise man.

But this entire expedition had put a strain on him. They do not have complete control over Jerusalem so simply being here, digging underneath Solomon’s Temple was a danger all by itself.

But he had just received word that left him in a very bad mood and everyone was walking lightly, hoping they wouldn’t be the one to step on broken glass.

“And we can’t just… unblock it?”

The messenger hesitated.

“What is blocking it?” Robert asked with a frown.

“I… I believe it is better if you come see for yourself, sire.”

With that ominous words, the messenger led them deeper into the tunnel they had been digging. Maria did not know just how deep Robert wishes to dig nor did she know what they were digging this much more.

All Robert said was that a treasure that can change the entire world nestled deep underground.

Maria believed that Robert was talking about a holy artifact, perhaps the grail or the ark.

Something that will show to everyone that this Holy War is necessary.

That they are doing what is right and what God has intended.

As they reached the end of tunnel, Maria froze.

As the entire tunnel echoed the roar of the beast impending their holy mission.

[ranalatus]

The Imposter — VI.

genre: SAGAU, villain/imposter AU, isekai

characters: yae miko, hu tao, chongyun, ganyu, brief mentions of other adepti, imposter!GN reader, creator of teyvat (true god)

warnings: blood, mentions of death, undeserved hate towards hu tao and chongk :(( (yae doesn't mean it i swear its because of circumstances)

notes: and here's part 6!! Almost 2k words full of lore for the story!! (p.s. i definitely overlapped reader's main "ew fuck death" idea with cale henituse)

You run your hand through your hair, wishing to just tug it all out

You never wanted to play God in the first place, and yet here you are

“Your excellency,” Yae Miko, the person in charge of accompanying you today, greets. “Is something the matter? You look stressed.”

You look away from her as she elegantly (and rather shamelessly, considering you're posing as their God) sat on top of the desk in front of you

How could you not be stressed? The conversation you had with the true God a few days ago has been messing with your head

“I'm.. What?”

“Do you not believe me?” You stood up, walking closer to their survival kit. “I can prove it to you. The God of Teyvat usually has sparkling gold blood, I don't have it,” You take a knife from their bag (where they got it from, you don't know), and slowly, you prick your finger. The red blood that drips from your hand is a telltale sign. You're not the God. “See? Now you try.”

They flinch when you lightly push the knife towards them. A few seconds pass and they still make no sign of taking the knife themselves to test your theory out, only staring at your bleeding finger

“I thought people who transmigrated had different color blood from other people here,” They eventually whispered. “I didn't think..”

So they know?

You hum. “Perhaps it was your brain trying to rationalize this situation. It's alright, it's pretty normal in absurd situations like ours.”

Your words of comfort barely moved them. They stayed still for a little longer than a few minutes, and you were getting restless. You've spent too long in here already, Xiao could burst in at any moment now. You had to get them to forgive you or else–

“Am I really.. The God?”

You stare back into their eyes. Disbelief and distrust swirled in them like stars in the night sky. It'd have been beautiful, if only the life in them hadn't faded away

You gulped, feeling guilt wash over your being

“Yes,” Carefully, you grab their hand, feathery touches trying to comfort their cold figure. “You are. Trust me.”

Would they be more inclined to forgive you if you smile? You thought. It was rather selfish thinking, but you witnessed Teyvat's cruelness right in front of your very eyes. This much is nothing

And so you smiled, you showed them kindness for the very first time since they arrived. Genuine, untainted kindness

Is what they thought

You frowned. Were they touch starved for too long? Lonely? Had it really been that easy to earn their trust? Their forgiveness? Their fucking identity?

Their reaction to your smile was apparently, to ask you for a favor. And it had shocked you so much you weren't even able to ask for their forgiveness so you don't lose your head

“I.. I'll trust you.”

Your smile grew wider, more happy as you opened your mouth to finally rejoice in not having to die. Until the next words came out of their mouth

“Then, can you continue posing as the true Creator?”

“..What?”

“I need.. Time,” They look away almost guiltily, biting their lip and gazing off into the distance like they had much to think about. “I need to give it more thought, as well as settle some things with a few.. Acquaintances.”

You could give them time. You could allow them to think things through, settle things with whoever they've come into contact with (who were sane enough to actually talk to them first instead of trying to serve their head on a silver platter to you), but why did you have to continue posing as them?

It's awkward. It's uncomfortable. And though you're in the presence of quite possibly the most beautiful kitsune you have ever seen in your life, it's distasteful on your tongue

“Your excellency,” A soft hand on your chin forces your attention away from your thoughts, eyes going from glaring at the wall to staring into the sparkling galactic eyes of the fox lady now taking up most of your vision. “If I hadn't known any better, I'd say you're getting bored of me. But that's impossible, right? After all, you told me yourself that I am your favorite.”

There is nothing but pride and playfulness in her eyes. She really believes she has the favor of the God

And hell, if you were the God she'd be right in this moment

But you're not, and that fact is enough to make you shake her hand off your face and get up from your seat

“I wish to take a walk in my gardens.” You say, not even waiting for her to catch up, afraid of the enigmatic air around her

Because of this, you miss the way her eyes narrow at your back briefly before she gets up as well to follow you

. . .

Unfortunately, even the gardens seem to be just as eventful as your mind

“Chongyun, Hu Tao, what are you doing here?” You question, with no hostility in your voice whatsoever, Yae notes, but said Liyue citizens only simultaneously shake and freeze under your gaze

“That– Your excellency, we–” Hu Tao glances over to Chongyun, who seems to have been just as frozen as his vision, clearly no help. Hu Tao firms herself just a little bit more, before her eyes slowly drifted back to their so called God

Her hands subtly push the notebook onto the table behind them as she speaks. “Your excellency, we wanted to see you.”

“Oh?” Your eyes don't seem to hold any suspicion nor doubt, in fact they seem to have brightened up a bit. Hu Tao faintly called herself crazy at that moment. “Is there a reason you want to see me?”

“There must be,” Yae interjects, standing side by side with you. A privilege not many people get. “Seeing as they rushed over to your gardens right away and not to your reception area.”

“That..”

“Is it urgent?” You ask, eyebrows furrowing ever so slightly. You take a cautious step closer to the tense individuals, who you assume to have been tense because something important happened. “Is it related to Osial or Beisht? The Fatui? I can call the Tsaritsa here immediately if anything happened to your home.”

The people of Liyue shouldn't go through any more traumatizing events, especially under your temporary rule, you think to yourself. Yes, perhaps preventing serious situations from happening would allow me to escape death from their hands

The three acolytes surrounding you, unable to know what you are thinking of, stare at you stunned for a moment

It's not that you used to hate Liyue, in fact you didn't even care about the nation much in the first place. You would have had it completely remodeled had Zhongli not barely convince you otherwise, given how taxing it would have been to it's people

What was more shocking was the fact you called it their home

Did you ever think of the nations as a home to anyone? To you, every place on Teyvat was just a piece of land with resources you could farm. To you, every creature on Teyvat was either out to kill you or there to worship the ground you walk on

To you, well, it always revolved around you

To think of Teyvat as more than just an unwelcoming earth? A boring piece of land?

To think of Teyvat as their home?

Hu Tao bites down on the bottom of her lip, feeling her hands shake from where they're behind her back. Chongyun clenches his fists tight, also realizing their God's strange wording

“..It's nothing serious, your excellency,” Comes Hu Tao's quiet voice, unlike her usual self, you note. “We wanted to see how you were doing.”

“Oh,” You had to suppress the smile that wants to appear on your face. “I am.. Coping. It's not something you have to worry about, so you may go back to your parlor and exorcist business.”

“..Yes, your excellency.” Both Hu Tao and Chongyun mumble before bowing deeply to you. You watch them as they leave, feeling a breeze pass by you as you turn to look at where Yae had just been a moment ago

“Hm?” You look forward at Yae who was leaning on the table, narrowly eyeing the two Liyue citizens who had just left

“Your excellency, they wasted your time.”

You blinked once, twice, before opening your mouth and barely responding to the rather vicious comment of the kitsune

“Uh, well–”

“I don't get why you don't just get rid of their acolyte status. It's not like they're much of a loss.” She leans further back, hands moving behind her back to support her upper body weight. Her eyes then move to you, making you feel a sort of pressure that's pinning you down. You feel naked under her eyes, as though you have no other choice but to tell her how you truly feel

“That's pretty harsh, Yae,” You walk closer to her, unwavering, just as a true ruler should. “Compared to you, yes, they may not be that strong or whatever, however they are still my people. They are still just as capable and just as full of potential as you are. I don't blindly choose my acolytes.”

A complete lie, your inner voice whispers. You didn't choose these people at all. Though, it is true they're just as capable and full of potential as Yae is. After all, everyone in Genshin could have been a DPS if the player wants them to be. And while you are definitely not the actual God of Teyvat, they are still temporarily your people

“..A fair judgement, your excellency.” She swiftly moves her hands in each of her opposite sleeves, bowing a full 90 degrees. “Forgive me for not properly assessing your wisdom of choice.”

Suddenly feeling iffy, you shake your head at Yae's actions. “It's nothing. Just keep my words in mind next time. I'll head back to my room now.”

Yae stays in her position. “Of course, your excellency. Then I shall follow you back in a bit.”

You were truly scared of this woman. “Don't.”

She doesn't say anything else as you leave, thus you couldn't hear the shuffling of the two Liyue citizens who have not yet left because of Yae's words. Nor could you have heard their hushed whispers

“..Hey, let's– let's not say anything about the notebook for now.”

“..Right.”

Hu Tao and Chongyun finally leave, feeling both of their hearts lighten up and become heavy with burden simultaneously

Meanwhile, a figure hidden in the blue leaves of a tree nearby jumps off, landing safely down in front of the previously bowed Yae

Yae Miko brings her hand out of her sleeve, a notebook with the Feiyun Commerce Guild logo seen on the cover

“Investigate this with Morax, and we should call over the Knights of Favonius people as well,” Yae hands the notebook over to the adeptus in front of her. “I'll inform the Shogun.”

Ganyu nods, flipping the pages open and skimming through the contents. A frown takes place on her face as she stops on one of the pages

“..I should inform the other adepti as well,” She bites her lip, hands trembling a bit. “The vigilant yaksha, Xiao was said to be the one who last located the imposter before all operations related to the hunt ceased, right?”

“Correct,” A smirk appeared on Yae's features, finding this situation to be a whole lot more entertaining. “It seems our vicious lion of a God has many secrets in their mane.”

Truly, you wouldn't have expected one tiny forgotten object to be the cause of such a massive uproar in the future

Tagging: @quiet-qqq @uchihaeirin @celesther @renamichii @karylles-world @keepdaydreamingg @campanula-rotundifolia @whitebunny80 @liyacreate @nishayuro @applepi1415 @karmawonders @ayamvirus

— IM SORRY THIS TOOK LIKE FOREVER LMAO my laptop broke and I couldn't play genshin for a while, since my motivation also went down during it 😭 not to mention the stressful school week I had *sigh* but its finally here! And we're progressing with lore 😼😼

[whimsicallyenchantedrose]

Thanksgiving Reruns 2023--Day 3: Black Friday (1/3)

It is crazy to me that it’s already time for this, but the holidays have officially arrived!  I would like to wish all my followers who celebrate it a very happy Thanksgiving.  As a thank you to you (as well as my followers who DON’T celebrate), I present you with 3 Thanksgiving related stories I’ve written in the past.  Enjoy!

Title: Black Friday—Chapter 1 of 3

Rating: G

Words: 1442

Summary: CS as single parents AU. As the holidays approach, Emma’s son Henry and Killian’s daughter Alice ask for a specific storybook which will ONLY be available for purchase on Black Friday.

 Other Chapters: 1 2 4 5

Black Friday—Chapter 1

One week before Thanksgiving

“Do you really think it’ll work?” she asked, leaning forward, eyes bright and delighted.

“It’s perfect!” he answered. “Trust me!  Our plan will work like a charm.  Just make sure you give him Miss French’s flier and make him see how much you want it.  I’ll do the same with her.  By Christmas, we’ll be celebrating our success.”

She grinned.  “Oh, I hope you’re right!  Can you imagine?  If we pull this off, everything will change forever!”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The morning after Thanksgiving

The alarm clock roared to life as a way, way too enthusiastic version of Jingle Bell Rock blared from the speakers of her clock radio. Emma groaned, reaching blindly over to slam the button on the top of the alarm and make the noise stop.

3 am.  It was entirely too early for any sane person to be awake.  Even the early birds were still peacefully snoozing in their nests.  It was only the crazy humans, intent on getting the best deals on the best Christmas gifts who would submit themselves to this kind of torture.

She hoped the payout was worth it.

Her bed was so warm, so comfortable, that for a split second, Emma considered just forgetting about the whole thing and going back to sleep, but then she thought about Henry.

It had been a difficult year for him, for both of them really.  They’d had a great life in New York.  Her bail bonds gig had paid well enough that they could afford a wonderful apartment. Henry had lots of friends at school.  She’d had a guy she loved, a guy she really thought was the one.  He’d seemed great with Henry, and Henry had really liked him.  

Walsh had proposed a week before Halloween, and Emma had really considered saying yes.  Granted, she didn’t feel the epic, sweeping, melt-into-a-pile-of-goo passion you see in movies, but she did love Walsh, and he could be a wonderful addition to the little family circle she and Henry had put together.

At least that’s what she thought.

Emma had made up her mind to accept the proposal when it all went south.  Turns out Walsh wasn’t at all who he said he was.  He’d been playing a long con on her, doing his level best to steal her money and assets right from under her nose, and she felt like a fool for buying into it his b.s.  She was smarter than this!  She ran the honey trap on bail jumpers; she knew the playbook.  How did she fall for it?

She’d just so badly wanted that perfect, white-picket-fence life for herself, and especially for her ten-year-old son, that’s how.

After everything had so epically crashed and burned with Walsh, Emma had just wanted to get away.  She’d wanted--needed--a new start, and so when her brother David had mentioned the opening for a deputy in the tiny town of Storybrooke, Maine, where he lived with his wife Mary Margaret, Emma had jumped at the opportunity.

Within a week, she’d uprooted her whole life--and her son’s whole life--and moved to Storybrooke.  For the moment, she and Henry were crashing with David and Mary Margaret in their tiny loft apartment until Emma could find them their own place.

The move had been the most difficult on Henry.  All he’d ever known was back in New York--friends, school, entire lifestyle.  Small town Storybrooke was like a totally different world than the booming metropolis he was used to.  Her normally happy, vivacious kid had been quiet, almost withdrawn since they’d arrived in Storybrooke.

Emma knew kids were resilient, that Henry would bounce back, but she felt so damn guilty for causing him stress.

And so, naturally when Henry had come home a week ago, excitement bumped up to a level ten, talking a mile a minute and waving a flier in her face, Emma had taken notice.  Turns out the school librarian Belle French--who was also the owner and proprietor of “A Tale as Old as Time”, Storybrooke’s best (and only) bookstore--was holding a special Black Friday sale on a very special storybook, entitled Once Upon a Time.  She had one copy, and one copy only, and the rare book would normally sell for an exorbitant price--somewhere between an arm and a leg.  On Black Friday, however, she was offering the book for dirt cheap, but there was a catch.  The price was only good during the special, Black Friday early bird sale.  Doors opened at 4 am.   First person to touch the book had the opportunity to purchase it.

Henry had always loved stories, and he’d been particularly fascinated with fairy tales.  Naturally, a book chalk full of them would be right up Henry’s alley.  Faced with the prospect of getting Henry the perfect gift, the gift that would finally bring him some joy after the difficult last few weeks, it was a no brainer.

Waking up a few hours before the crack of dawn was a small price to pay for her kid’s happiness.

Emma pushed aside the covers and got up, throwing on the first pair of clean clothes she could find, twisting her hair into a messy bun, and then downing the strong coffee her sister-in-law had set to brew for her.  By the end of her second cup, she was feeling almost human, and she was ready to brave the hordes of Black Friday shoppers to attain her prize.

It was a quick, five minute walk to the center of town where “A Tale as Old as Time” was located, and Emma made it just as the cheerful brunette proprietor was unlocking the doors and letting her first customers in.  Emma knew just where her target was.  She’d scoped out the bookstore over the weekend, getting the lay of the land and mapping out her plan of attack.  She knew just where to go, and within sixty seconds of the store opening, she’d reached her target.  It was right there, in sight.

Emma reached for the book, her hand made contact--just as another hand did as well.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Killian Jones had lived a difficult life.  He’d seen more heartache and tragedy in his thirty-five years of existence than most people did in a lifetime.  Aye, it had been an incredibly difficult life, but it did have one bright, shining spot.

His daughter Alice.

His one-night-stand with Alice’s mom, Eloise, had been a mistake of epic proportions, but Killian would never regret it, because it gave him the greatest blessing of his life, his precious little starfish.

Nine months after their dalliance, Eloise had suddenly showed up on his doorstep, placed their newborn daughter in his arms, and then walked out of their lives forever.  For himself, Killian couldn’t have cared less.  He felt nothing but revulsion for the woman who’d gotten him blind drunk and then taken advantage of him that night nine months ago.  In the bright morning light, he’d been disgusted with her, with himself, and with the entire sordid affair.  He’d have been more than happy if he never saw her noisome face again.

No, he didn’t care if she walked away from him, but his heart had broken at the fact that his tiny, perfect daughter had been abandoned by her mother.  Killian knew from first hand the agony of being abandoned by a parent, and it tore him up inside that his beloved daughter had to deal with it as well.

Though having a child was the farthest thing from his mind at the time, there’d never been any doubt what he would do.  Alice was his daughter, his precious child, and he would do right by her no matter what.

Ten years later, he thanked his lucky stars every single day that he’d made the choice to raise her.  Alice was the most important person in the world to him, and there was nothing he wouldn’t do for her.

So naturally, when she came home from school all excited about the book Miss French was selling, Killian knew exactly how he would be spending his very early Black Friday morning.

He’d arrived at “Tale as Old as Time” just as Miss French opened the doors.  He rushed to the back of the store, his prize in sight.

He grabbed the book just as a gorgeous blonde made contact.  

“Um excuse me,” she said with a frown.  “This book is mine.”

It appeared this shopping expedition was going to be more difficult--although possibly more intriguing--the blonde truly was breathtaking--than he’d expected.

Killian grinned.  He’d never backed down from a challenge, and he didn’t intend to begin now.

Next Chapter-->

[huenjin]

don't wanna be friends.

pairing: hyunjin x reader | bff2l!au, pornstar!au

word count: 3.705 words

tw: pornstar!hyunjin, nsfw content — dick piercing!hyunjin, multiple orgasms, breast play, breath play, fingering, cunnilingus, marking, penetration, unprotected sex, dumbification, slight overstimulation, creampie, mentions of reader masturbating to hyunjin's porn and the porn explained in detail.

music rec: damage is done | devin hoffman.

note: this was an nsfw ask originally but it got way past the limit, so tada, made it into a oneshot. if anyone was wondering why it's in this format/theme. unedited, like every other work of mine.

you gulp down the next shot under hyunjin's watchful supervision. you've lost count of the shots you have taken and hyunjin has lost count of how many times he has told you to stop, that you are drinking too much.

"he told me that i can't fuck right. that i should at least pretend to fake it to satiate him," you scoff, another tear rolling down from the brim of your eyes and hyunjin wraps his arms around you, pulling into him to comfort you. "i can't— jinnie, i just don't come when he fucks me. i— maybe something is wrong with me. maybe i just can't orgasm when someone—"

"hush," hyunjin slowly taps your back to keep your thoughts shut. "there's nothing wrong with you, minion. you're fine." he pushes your big round spectacles up, calling you by the name he's always teased you with.

you slam the shot glass down, eyes groggy and head woozy from all the drinks you've gulped down. you lean forward, eyes wide open, glasses sliding down as you look closely at your best friend.

hwang hyunjin is attractive. you've always known your best friend is attractive. his bright eyes that light up at the sight of his dog, kkami, running to him right after you cuddled kkami forever. or the way his face morphs into one of disgust when you threaten to put eggplants into his plate. or the way he'd cuddle you when the weather gets too cold. hyunjin is attractive, both in looks and behaviour.

beyond this, your best friend, hwang hyunjin, is insatiable in the eyes of many women and men, including yours. a pornstar by profession, he knows the ways around women, having them come undone in his hold in minutes — you refuse to believe it's orchestrated. you know how he is in bed or at least what the biz wants him to exhibit and that alone has you trembling.

and to make matters worse in your end, you've orgasmed only once your whole life and that was during the time when you played with yourself while stumbling upon his porn (you were randomly searching for one and the temptation to watch your best friend just exceeded everything).

you knew his profession for so long — hyunjin told it to you over a glass of wine that you spat onto his white shirt the minute he told you about it. the conversation was never spoken about after that.

until today.

"what are you doing, minion? damn," he chuckles, "you really look like a minion with those glasses."

you still once you close in on hyunjin. hands on his chest, eyes fixated on his, you lick your lips and hyunjin's eyes widen, eyes unknowingly trailing downwards till he has to tear his gaze away, reminding himself that it's you, that it's his best friend.

"do you want to fuck me?" liquid courage, indeed.

"you must be kidding me?"

"why? you do this regularly."

hyunjin shoves you away, pushing you back against the couch. his eyes narrows on your figure and you fold your arms. he huffs, eyes glaring at you before looking away. he stretches his arm to take a glass and pour himself a drink, gulping it down and feeling the much needed burn in his throat.

"why?" you whine. "jinnie, that's your job. fuck me. you don't mind it. i'll just be one of those girls."

"i do mind it," he raises his voice. "you're not just one of those girls. fuck, y/n, you're the only constant in my life. why would i fuck that up?"

you bite your lower lip, eyes watering at the rejection suddenly. your drunkenness is what stirs the emotional side in you and your heart is heavy. you just want to be able to fuck like everyone else, just want to feel the bliss your friends talk about, the euphoria they reach.

"wait, are you going to cry?"

"no," you bite your tongue from letting out the sob. "i won't cry. you're not the first guy to reject me. this is normal. no one wants to—"

"y/n."

"—fuck me. who would want to fuck the girl that can't orgasm, let alone fake one?" you let out a fake laugh, tears finally rolling down your eyes.

"oh goodness," hyunjin sighs. he pulls you into him for a hug, rubbing your back soothingly. "you're my best friend, y/n. i shouldn't—"

"i want you to," you look up at him. hyunjin heaves in a huge breath. it catches in his throat as he looks down at you. god, he loves you. he has loved you for years now but who would want to be in a relationship with a guy who fucks girls for a living? not anyone sane. you deserve better. fuck, you deserved so much better than him.

yet, his heart won't stay still. his mind won't stop racing with thoughts he shouldn't normally have about his best friend. heavens, you have hyunjin wrapped around your finger and you don't even know it.

"y/n, don't—"

hyunjin loses his last bit of control over your proposition the minute you place your lips over his. it's exactly as he has envisioned. soft, delicate and everything that kept him away from breaking. you capture his bottom lip, kissing him softly, hands trailing under his sweater. hyunjin feels the goosebumps rising up, your warmth seeping into his. it takes everything in hyunjin to keep his hands away.

you pull away, catching your lower lip with your teeth before letting go and looking away, "you won't even kiss me back. am i that worse? do i kiss bad? jinnie, i just want to be—"

hyunjin has his hands on your face, turning it for you to look at him before he has his lips crashing down on yours, taking your breath away. you heave, breath hitching and you gasp.

hyunjin is aphrodite. the very reincarnation of sin. he creeps into you just as you expected, crawling into your mind and captivating every single sense of yours. your hands are in his hair, tugging at the roots and moving against his body. his hand sprawls over your neck and his thumb presses into the neck, rubbing slow circles. he kisses the top of your lips, your hands tugging at his sweater and you are moaning into his mouth.

you pull away for a second, fingers digging into his clothes, tugging at it to be thrown away and hyunjin obliges. helping you out of yours too, the two of you face each other stark naked. you take him in for the divinity he is in your head, eyes trailing down to his slightly erect dick and you gasp.

it's true. the videos don't lie. he is bigger than you had seen, girth firmer than you had envisioned and the frenum piercing has you salivating. it shines under the lighting, your eyes unable to drift away from it, lips parted slightly and heavens, hyunjin can't take his eyes away from you either. was this what he was missing out all this while in the name of friendship?

his lips are back on yours, your breasts firm against his chest as his cock rubs against your inner thigh. it's messy, heavy and has you panting for breath, chasing after his tongue, wrapped around yours like they never want to let go.

quicksand. this is quicksand. you're falling in too quick; falling into everything hyunjin has to offer way too quickly. and you love it. your mind is rid of thoughts. just hyunjin, hyunjin, hwang hyunjin. he pushes back, still kissing you heavily, till your back hits the soft covers of the couch and he's hovering over you.

hyunjin's tongue licks your lower lip, causing you to moan and he's groaning at the sensation, pulling apart for air few minutes later. he cups your face, thumb brushing the side and you lean into his palm.

"i— we should—"

"no, please don't stop," you beg. "not now. please. we're in too deep to stop."

"but y/n—"

"please fuck me, jinnie. fuck me like you fucked soojin."

hyunjin's eyes widens and he pulls away from you. looking at you as if he's staring into your soul, he gulps. "how did you—" his cheeks redden. "wait—" you bite your lower lip. hyunjin pulls the rubber band that holds his hair up, causing the silver strands to fall forward. he runs his finger through it, pushing it back as he holds it tightly to focus. "you watched my porn."

you gulp, lips drying up and you nod, running your mouth quickly to justify yourself. "i did. it was supposed to be a one time thing but—" you look away. "—i touched myself to that. i fingered myself to you fucking soojin and it's the only time i came."

if hyunjin has been just losing it all this while, now, he has lost it completely. his eyes darken, a light growl leaving his lips as he holds your legs and pulls you closer into his kneeling self. you groan slightly in his grip.

"you want me to fuck you like i fucked soojin?"

"yes—"

"want me to fuck you like some doll, huh?" he bends forward, kissing your neck, sucking at the skin till they stain purple to his pleasure. hyunjin marks you all the way to your breasts, covering your skin with both dark and light marks as you repeatedly confirm, "yes, yes, yes."

hyunjin pulls away, staring at you almost tauntingly, licking his lips and running his hand through his hair. he drops the words like they are heavy. "tell me then. tell me what i did and i'll do the same to you, just like you wished."

"you fuck—"

"no," he shakes his head. "in detail. from the very first scene. you'll get only what you ask for. nothing more. nothing less. so, go on, doll. tell me."

the power you hold is insane. you do not know how to use it, however. having never been given this much power, you look at your best friend for a while before slowly telling him. the words seem foreign to you but if this is how it is going to be, and if this helps you come, you're doing it.

"y-you kissed her first." your voice is barely audible. like you're telling hyunjin a secret. hyunjin catches your lips yet again, tongue presses against your lower lip before he slips it in, tangling it with yours as he kisses you. you moan, eyes closing as your hand wrap around his axle, hands pressed on his back. your fingers plays with the few strands of his silver dyed hair at the nape. he pulls back, waiting for you to continue.

with a little more confidence and the huge amount of liquid courage in you, you demand, "you marked her up like you just did to me. i hate that you marked her up. i hated it so much but turned me on."

hyunjin sucks a hickey right above your breast, speaking into your skin, "you hated it, doll?"

"yes. wanted it to be me." hyunjin's teeth grazes your skin and you moan, "fuck." your fingers pull his hair lightly and hyunjin grunts, teeth biting into your skin, making a dark mark that has you arch your back and your thigh to rub against his cock.

"what else did you see me do, doll?" his mouth trails further down to your breast and you gasp.

"you sucked on her breasts. played with it harshly." hyunjin abides by it, sucking on your breasts, tongue lapping around your nipples and drawing out circles by it. "yes, yes— fuck, jinnie, oh my—" hyunjin finds it seductive as fuck that you never complete your sentences as you moan. and he wants you like that — barely being able to say words besides his name. that's all he needed to hear.

"you played with soojin's other breast at the same time like—" his hand is already on your right breast. it pinched the nipple, twisting it between his thumb and forefinger. the pain shoots up and it clouds your senses, causing you to grind on his cock. your arousal leaks through you, and you feel yourself grow wetter with every single flick of hyunjin's tongue.

his right hand is still on your breast, his lips trail downward. your breath hitches in your throat and you let out a shortened sigh as he breathes lowly against your skin, kissing it before landing right in front of your core, wet with want for the man before you.

"so fucking wet and what for, doll?"

"your cock, oh my god. jinnie, want your cock in me. please." you beg, writhing in his hold as he grabs your breast, fondling it in his hold.

"that's not what i did in that video. go on, continue." it's stern with command and has you spitting out the next in sequence instantly.

"you—" hyunjin is playing with your nipples as he waits for you to speak. his finger twist and turn your nipples and you're squeezing your thighs together in this intense pleasure. "fuck, can't think, jinnie. i don't know. i—"

"no, no," he hushes. kissing your pubic mound and licking small stripes, he mumbles, "you have to remember the only porno that had you come, right?"

"you—" you feel his warm breath all over your core and a gush of arousal oozes out. "you had your mouth on her pussy. you ate her out till she came, oh my god. you ate her out—"

"well done, doll." and his lips are on your wet ones. he licks at the lips, pushing it apart as he takes in your arousal, lapping in to take it all. it's merciless. and if you thought his porn was intense, you forgot all about how hyunjin himself was a walking pornography. the way his tongue licks your lips, tip teasing your entrance as he rubs your clit, slowly. he draws small circles over it, tapping at the engorged button till your toes curl in, knees lift up to bend for your feet to press down. your eyes are squeezed shut and your fingers pull at his hair every time you feel the knot tightening.

the room is filled with lewd noises and your moans, resonating through the whole area for you to hear it out in the silence. it's pornographic. the voices you make resemble those that you heard. hyunjin licks another stripe up your sodden lips before wrapping the plump pair around your clit and sucking on it, loud noise of suckle resonating and causing you to move your hips slightly.

his teeth grazes over your clit, nibbling slightly till you feel the knot clench in your stomach. it's a vortex forming deep within and from the one time experience you have, you know. it's coming. you're so close. hyunjin rubs your clit furiously, mouth moving back your lip as he eats you out. he pulls apart right when he knows you're soon to come and in a second, two of his fingers are deep within you, rubbing against your inner walls and you're crying out his name just like he wanted.

it's hyunjin, hyunjin, hyunjin. that's all he can hear — his name dripping in saccharine from your mouth, topped with all those insatiable moans that leave your lips and hyunjin quickens his pace. the two fingers thrust in and out of you, finding the spot and rubbing at the walls to elicit a particular reaction — hyunjin is searching. searching for that one spot that will have you ruined for him.

"fuck, oh fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, what—"

the minute he touches a particularly soft area, he has you grinding down on him, chanting his name like a mantra and he knows — hyunjin's found your spot. he rubs it as he curves his fingers, having you arch further into him. he sucks on your clit, fingers thrusting in you relentlessly.

and you come undone so easily that it's a surprise how your ex couldn't do this for you. you see the white under your eyelids as you come undone. hyunjin helps you ride it out. he removes his fingers and licks you clean, taking in every single drop of your orgasm.

"told you that you were perfect," he says, looking at you and smiling. he kisses your mound as he lifts your hips up. "you're the most perfect human being ever. so how in the world could anything be wrong with you?" he wipes away the tears rolling down your eyes, as an effect from the intensity of the orgasm you went through. "so, doll, now tell me what else did i do?"

your mind is blank. you can't think of anything. your mind is filled with just the man before you in all his naked glory and how you just want him. "want you, jinnie. please. i want your dick. please want that."

"that's not the answer to my question," he huffs. "did i not lift her legs up like this?" he lifts your legs and places it over his shoulders. his erect cock is angled right and he rubs the head all over your wetness. you hitch and whine, stuttering how much you want him. "did i fuck my doll dumb? did i fuck out all your brains, baby? oh no. should i fuck you more? can you answer that, doll?"

you nod, lips parting. "want jinnie's dick. want it. want it in me."

"as you wish, doll," and he inserts it into you, pushing your walls apart with his fingers till he thrusts completely into you. his piercing underneath his shaft drags against your walls, the cold metal adding the extra sensation that tingles your nerves. his large hands hold your hips up, your ankles hitting his back bone everytime he thrusts into you. he uses his one hand to hold your wrists together above you as he hits your spot over and over again. the friction of his big cock and the frenum piercing is all too much right after one orgasm. the stimulation is over bearing and you know why the girl in the video has her eyes roll up, tongue out and lips swollen.

hyunjin plunges into you and you gush all over his cock, coating almost all of his length with your arousal. hyunjin is barely in but he is already hitting your spot, hot tip brushing against it vicariously and the frenum piercing cold against it. the friction is enough to have the knot tighten so fast and hard that you know this is going to overpower you. hyunjin lets go of you wrists but you hold them above you obediently. his hand trails to hold your breast, squeezing it and fondling with it; the other holding your legs up securely.

with every thrust, his piercing drags against your walls and his balls slap against your cheeks. tears spill down your face as you scream loudly, "jin-ah, fuck. jinnie, jinnie, jinnie. it's too much, oh my god. i can feel it. oh—"

"you're taking it like a good, good doll for me. you can take more. i know you can." he takes his cock out. he wraps his fingers around it and dragging it across your slit and your core, the frenum piercing rubbing against it and you're ready to snap again.

and without any warning, he enters into you again, this time harshly and with a quicker pace. it is fast and hard and has you gripping onto him for the life of yours, your hands moving to hold his biceps, fingers digging into it. hyunjin fucks you like he wants to take you to heaven and back. like he wants to show you everything you are missing out and that there's nothing wrong with you. it's the men. always the men.

"going to fuck you and show you how you should be fucked. how you should be getting it. going to fuck you dumb, doll and have you be mine."

he doesn't stop. hyunjin is grunting and huffing as he thrusts repeatedly in you, his pubic bone hitting your clit and causing short sorts of heightened sensations.

"jinnie! i'm coming. i'm coming. oh fuck, i'm—"

second one in a span of few hours. if you could think properly, you would be surprised at how you came twice. it's surprising that you've come thrice so far in your whole life and all three times were to be credited to hwang hyunjin, your best friend.

you come around his cock, the white flash spreading under your eyelids and you are weeping. you feel the rushing oxytocin clouding your brain as you clench tightly on his cock. hyunjin doesn't stop however, as he chases after his own high, thrusting even faster if it were possible and overstimulating you. in a few minutes, hyunjin is coming in you. hot white spurts of his cum coating your insides as he thrusts his orgasm out, only to pull it out eventually and have his white come and yours poze out and stain the couch.

your eyes are shut and you are panting heavily, chests rising and hyunjin brushes your hair away from your face, wiping the sweat that has accumulated by your forehead. he places your legs down and mumbles, "you okay, minion?"

"hm," you respond. that's all you can say. you were too fucked out to think or do anything. hyunjin chuckles and slowly getting off the couch, he carefully lifts you up into his arms. you snuggle into his chest, wrapping your arms around him. "where are we going?"

hyunjin barely hears you question with how soft it was. you repeat and it is the second time that he hears it perfectly.

"going to clean you up and rest you in bed. you need to sleep well now." you nod, snuggling further into his chest as he carries you into his bedroom.

hyunjin's wrong, though. when he wondered how in the world anything could be wrong with you, he clearly knew there is something wrong with you.

you are too dense to ever realise how deep his feelings are for you.

[eluxcastar]

I was being a single mom who works two jobs loves their kids and never stops (I have no children 💀 but it felt that way). Guess who's about to ruin the aesthetic dividers by haphazardly shoving every divider they've ever used in (update got pissed off trying to move them with my fingers they match now)

HOUSE OF WOLVES AU OMG, I feel like thematically that makes the most sense. If they have equal shares of that (or both wanted it/both knew they both wanted it), attacking where it hurts, Arle feels very Pantalone-like— she needs it for the orphanage, most likely, whether she's entitled to it or not. What better way to throw her off than to destroy it?

Leaving the orphanage unprotected would be a blind spot, and that's something to be exploited. He can weaponise the fact he sent loverboy after it, and even if she does get it, it'll be one last middle finger to say Pantalone got the last laugh. Tbh, I think it would be generally interesting for loverboy to have to fight those three, but also so extremely stressful because that's an uneven matchup. Strangely, I almost feel like they wouldn't totally want to fight each other either because none of them have anything against each other; they're just butting heads because the people they're associated with are.

I find it absolutely hilarious because, like, Dottore just existed doing his thing, and they all went, "Yo what the FUCK is up with that guy—" and made the tbf pretty sane choice to just not touch whatever is going on over there. Not everyone can be child reader protected by the threat of Arle's belt

His opinion of Pierro literally being

is so funny to me because, much like half his opinions on people, he's like, "WOW you're actually INSANE" like loverboy is too NORMAL. Get him OUT OF HERE

Also, the fact Capitano is so "You look like something a kid imagines under their bed or in their closet, but instead of eating the exposed limbs from outside the blanket, you just tuck them back under so they're nice and warm. Chill dude" I giggle

Tartaglia also feels so real because comparatively to the Harbingers, they are burdened by normalcy 💀 Tartaglia is so easy to be like, "Fight?? Oh, that's wonderful, no thanks—" and carry on because he may be microwaved but professionals have standards

LISTEN he's still got the temper but he just smiles through the pain of wanting to shoot people a little better now. It's about balance 🙏 you can be as fucked up as you want as long as you can hide it better than Dottore so people don't wanna kill you with hammers. You can't trust that face but for a minute you could think that's a man who wouldn't gaslight gatekeep girlboss (you'd be wrong)

Farsighted Pantalone is an interesting thought 🧐 unfortunately I am currently near-sighted, a blind bitch as some might say, so I will have to consult childhood me for that because I went from having reading glasses to distance glasses 😭 so if I ever wanted to write Pantalone leaning pov that would be a fun challenge

omg omg. loverboy who struggles to adapt to life again because he's in what should be a peaceful environment, he doesn't have to do anything like that anymore, and he should be fine. It somehow only gets worse, like being in a place where that's not acceptable fucks him up more, he's more violent than when he left because being a fatuu meant he had to be or he's get killed—for three years that was drilled into his head and now it's stuck with him. He reacts to the things working at the Northland Bank borderline conditioned him to, including scammers who think they can pull one over on him, and how was he told to deal with that? Break some bones.

Then the paranoia really starts to set in. What if he's too good at it? what if those three years were able to grind away at him just enough because, when he looks at all the people around him who assumedly also spent three years working for the fatui, the mildly envy-fuelled rose-coloured glasses he views a fraction of their lives through make everyone else seem so much more adjusted than he is, even though he tries to go back to civilian life like nothing happened.

it does a little bit make him a victim of perception, and he probably knows there's more than what little people present of themselves, but when you're struggling to fit back in where you're forcing yourself to fit, riddled with lingering guilt and the fear it got to you after all and are probably not living in the best circumstances now that you're without you nice fatui pay, you're gonna end up a little bit blind to reality and get stuck in questioning yourself.😭

I ACTUALLY DO I JUST NEVER POST IT because I may write it, but I certainly don't write it well, at least not that I have any confidence sharing. I imagine horny people are horny regardless, but I care even for the residents of horny jail, so I save them from the poorly written smut of my drafts. Idk how to explain in anything but the citrus scale, and I refuse to elaborate on that further because it's a relic of my days on a cursed orange app we all know and tolerate

all that is to say I'm totally fine rambling about it dw I keep a stash of nasty fics/art that would put a victorian nobleman in a permanent coma CIA couldn't waterboard some things outta me

BUT SO TRUE pathetic sobbing messes are just 🤌 I remember you told me about the corruption kink way back when you made the Kaveh request yes I remember these things it's archive memory still coming btw just on hold while it simmers again

I am inclined to agree, especially in Liyue. I think it would really kill some opportunities for him to have a former debt collector on his resume because that doesn't exactly speak to someone with a lot to offer but a good customer service smile. It's definitely not the kind of work history people would trust, especially not those who have bad blood with the Fatui 😔

That would also make an abundance of sense as to why dear old dad was so split between giving everything to the Tsaritsa and providing for his wife and son 💀 kid's gotta eat, and dad likes his job for the honour of it; it just works out to a father who went to get mild regularly in pursuit of following orders when loverboy was young

Literally, they DESTROY me. I have to write my own fics and save them for later when I get sappy over them and go back to read all the backstory and scenarios and stuff I wrote. It's a one-man show out here made for Riri by Riri 😭 throw them all in my notes, and when I feel sentimental, decide that it's the perfect time to go cry over Neru not being canon it or how cute Quintil and Skuld are or sob because Vela is so precious and I explode because Adam's her BOY her BABY and— this is not about loverboy anymore backtracking

RIGHT it's so delicious to think because it requires action from Pantalone that forces him to consider the viability of loverboy at all. He knows who he is, knows that guy is crazy because he tries to push him out a window, briefly considers making him bite the curb and ultimately decides to dig up some dirt on him and put this ViSiOn fROm ThE gODs of his to the test. Another opportunity to almost kill each other acquired

UNHAPPILY REFERENCE SPOTTED bro has such strong preservation he was working HARD GOING places all to get back to him husband who decided that fucker better have.wonderful explanation or he can chew lead. (Second instance of Pantalone being a little bit impulsive and rash because of anger)

————————

I ran out of images 💀💀

ME AND THE HOMIES VIOLATING ETHICAL BUSINESS PRACTICE WITH THIS ONE 🗣️🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🔥‼️‼️‼️ he wants that reinforced mop on his knees again giving him that same incredulous look he gave him back when Pantalone watched him first kill someone he wants to find the reddest lipstick he can in hopes of recreating that moment when he ran his thumb over his bloodied lip and made an even bigger mess of him

————————

the amount that has been written about this man is crazy we've got a whole essay here 😭😭 he's so spoiled but he deserves it because he's the baby boy 🙏

Ok lets go SImply reblogging your oneshot for my req isn't enough i need to analyze and annotate the entire thing like a literature professor and tell you Everything. (✿◡‿◡)

pantalone might be ooc

He's not!!!!!! by which i think this is fairly a Really Good portrayal of the guy considering the 5 sentences we know about him. He's strict!!! frankly a little scary!! And also chill and positive about loverboy!! But it felt Just Right!!!! ( •̀ ω •́ )✧

descriptions of blood

description so good i might as well have killed that man myself

...pretend that his lore has a spot where this fits perfectly

I think i can make it fit!! would you be cool with making minor changes if so?

"You're very good at what you do."

Imagining the same voice as sebastian michaelis saying this with the sexiest buttersmooth voice is eviscerating me. Very self-indulgent but praise kinks will always slay so hard.

...on the verge of stabbing him a moment ago. 

This,, and the small thing i wrote about loverboy launching them both out the window to escape an onslaught of assassins in my other req. get you a ship where one of them has completely normal knee-jerk reactions to kill the other <3

...as he crushes their hand beneath his shoe without mercy

Fatui Harbingers - House of Wolves - KIERU 0:15

...Instead, Pantalone looks unfazed by it all, stopping as he reaches the other side of you, free of most of the blood. He greets you with a knowing smile as he usually does.

hey ririto this is so ominous and eerie for some reason not known to me. Just the backdrop of grey and snow and probably a gruesome corpse right next to loverboy and Pantalone has a silent smile through everything. Delicious sentence 10/10.

"I knew making you a banker was a good idea,"

THIS IS SO. The confidence and quite calm assurance that pantalone says this with is SO. You'd never be sure whether to lean into it and let out a sigh of relief,, o r back up further becuase it sounds so good but all in the wrong ways.

...thumb brushing across your bottom lip slicked with blood.

fellas is it professional to feed double edged words of honey to your young inexperienced subordinate while kneeling in front of his battered and bruised self who killed someone for you,, and run a gloved thumb across his blood soaked lip. ( ͡• ͜ʖ ͡• )

"Who knew you had so many other talents,"

you are infusing these dialouges with crack cocaine giggling kicking my feet while being slightly concerned because Sir. What do you mean by that.

"Ah ah," he says, a harshness seeping into even just that sound. "Stay."  You stay put,

thank you for making loverboy so Ouppy.

"Lord Harbinger," you try to say

yes,, this could be a minor thing to adjust: i think we could actually fit this oneshot somewhere AFTER he gets his vision,, and BEFORE Pantalone becomes the Harbinger Regrator. Can be a valid reason for Pantalone to see that reader failed to kill the assassin from their shitty negotiation meeting,, and wanting to newly test him again after he had his vision + ambitions awakened to see if he can get past the fear of killing NOW. (Even then,, maybe due to inexperience/unfamiliarity of using visions, reader didn't think to raise his advantage of supernatural powers against another visionless man in this scenario.)

I'd think his first kill was one of the factors that caused him to leave after his 3year duty, not sticking around for Pantalone's promotion to Regrator.

"You are much like your father."

Top 10 things Not to say to someone with daddy issues-

...they're as wet behind the ears as you are.

Dear diary, Today i learned a new speech of expression

...Pantalone's hand that rests on your chin moves... "Now, try again. Dear banker, whatever do you mean?" 

this whole paragraph. What on earth do you mean 'ooc pantalone'. This is the MOST pantalone thing you could've written. Strict and intimidating about improving reader's meek attitude. a Push in the right direction.

"Is this a test?" you manage, words muffled by the way he squishes your face like putty beneath his fingers.

(thank you for making loverboy so Ouppy) x2

...and you know who, regardless of how 'anonymous' that source may have been in his words.

I MAY BE STUPID. （；´д｀）ゞ I CANT TELL. who you are hinting towards 😭😭

"Hold this," he adds, an unnervingly tender instruction for the way he was just behaving. 

There he is. its reminding me of: the same pantalone that washed reader with a clock in my very first req to you.

...looking probably about as pathetic as you think you do.

POV: You're Pantalone looking down at Loverboy.

I forgot how much of a bug-eyed wet dog loverboy is before his time-skip "character development" so to say. Thanks i love him.

"next time someone approaches you from behind, don't wait to stab them. Don't reach for your wet knife with your wet hands, either. Both of those things will get you killed."

I think pantalone is entirely having too much fun with observing Loverboy try climbing the ropes to how REAL fatuus run business.

"Come now. You want to go home and back to Liyue, don't you? I'm tired of this cold." 

Σ(っ °Д °;)っ back to liyue??? Loverboy is Liyuean??? pantalone stays in liyue??? I ALWAYS THOUGHT arlecchino called pantalone a bitch in Signora's funeral for "never leaving the comfort of his homeland?" Whuh-?

ALL IN ALL,, CLOSING THOGUHTS,, GOOD FOOD RIRITO DINNER HAS BEEN SERVED, ATE, AND LICKED CLEAN 10/10 ILY

I GOTT THIS JUST BEFORE I WENT TO SLEEP AND ONLY JUST GOT THE TIME TO ANSWER IT BUT I KNEWWW YOU WOULD GET THE HOUSE OF WOLVES REFERENCE

That is true actually and I realised after I posted it that like, wtf is in character for him?? 😭 he's said like two things and while I have memorised those things they're not a lot to go off but I'm glad you enjoy him (ﾉ´▽｀)ﾉ♪

Also if you can make it fit, feel free ☆(≧∀≦*)ﾉ I sorta only had a vague idea of where it might go, but at that point in time, loverboy works abroad in the Northland Bank. I'll also throw in that he travelled there for that job and unfortunately does not come from Liyue 😔 (unless he's supposed to?? I got the impression he was from Snezhnaya) it was more a "I bet you'd love to be back at a desk job rn" or something to that effect, loverboy is going back to the bank once things are settled where he belongs but Pantalone isn't going with him (hence why they're in Snezhnaya when this happenscause I also interpret at as him not liking to leave Liyue)

I'm so glad the J Michael Tatum love never stops but also you're so right praise kinks absolutely do. I also noticed that them trying to kill each other is like, a repeated theme so far 😭⁉️ LIKE WHEN PANTALONE WENT TO FIND HIM LAST ONESHOT HE WAS GONNA KILL THAT FUCKER

Confident possibly mildly degrading Pantalone is literally my favourite thing, like I chew on him. I chew on him being unnervingly calm because what would he have in the eyes of a wet mop boy besides an unwavering poker face. Get yourself a man who uses the blood of your enemies like your lipstick and knows he made good choices stationing you at his shady probably money laundering black hole of debt he calls a bank

Yk I agree actually I was trying to figure the timeline out in my head and realised it would've made more sense to happen before he was a Harbinger so I agree with this revision that actually makes it fit the lore and if I ever decide to make it a longer multichapter fic I'll definitely fix that 💀 t'was a victim of laziness

YES YES THIS Pantalone basically shaping him up so he doesn't literally die and being strict with it get so him. He'll prompt him to say it again but won't let it slide because that behaviour isn't going to be beneficial, especially not with someone who may be working under him long-term

I went back to read the part about the anonymous source line came from, and I think I figured out what happened here, so allow me to explain  (;ﾟдﾟ)   Ok so, it has a bit to do with the weird way I wrote this because when I said I wrote this on the train that was half a lie. I wrote some of it on the train and the rest at the library where I also edited what I already had because the spelling mistakes were atrocious. I did write down who it was but cut it when I decided it cluttered the story a bit which retrospectively was also a mistake because I didn't think about the fact it would seem like I was hinting at something at the time (ﾟ▽ﾟ*) the shorter, boring answer is that there's no one Ririto did a big silly and cut context in the chaotic editing this suffered

LMAO NOT THE CLOCK AGAIN

I love him the wet mop boy. I was like I want him to be at least a lil pathetic rn because his concerns are completely different. He's thinking about how to not die, and how much he misses his mom and his much fatui dick his dad must've been riding before death to think this career path was worth it (slash JOKING but he is still wondering why his father would have done this job willingly) that and I think men who whimper are cute thanks for coming to my Ted talk

HE IS ENJOYING IT and I love it sm

Hehe I am glad to know you haven't gone hungry today (^o^) and such high ratings for the banker and loverboy