#I also really love how they pretty allude to each run’s art style (and the crooked issue number box)

[sincerely-sofie]

Chapter 8 of Sofie Plays "Slay the Princess": The Hero and the Princess (Round 3) + The Damsel

This is a love story, but it's a love story that I wrote at thirteen during my Warrior Cats phase.

[ Beginning ] - [ Previous Part ] - [ Next Part ]

... Hopefully she doesn't mind the flesh rotting off of my avian visage?

This run is going exactly like the one where I was forced to kill her by the Narrator--- I'm hoping I can change it by not alluding to her gnawing off her own limbs and just checking upstairs for a key.

FRICK.

Interestingly, the option to slay the Princess is no longer available here. The run is a bit different, despite being very similar.

I can't select any of the options. Am I stuck like this?

IF YOU SCROLL DOWN YOU CAN WARN HER. OH MY WORD. THE ANGST IN THIS SCREENSHOT.

Can I please chuck the blade away so that she can defend herself with it. Please. Pretty please. Narrator pleeeeeeeease---

Huzzah! Okay new game title: Slay the Borb.

... I didn't think that was actually going to be the route we took, but alright. Fair. Knowing the way the writing in this game has gone, she's going to miss anything vital and just make it hurt.

This is probably the single game I hate having so many predictions about prove to be correct.

Oh, shoot, it's a new chapter? I couldn't see through my tears.

New party member: Now introducing the Voice of the Simp! ... Smitten. Voice of the Smitten. Yes. That's what I said.

Mirror check! The Smitten is a dork. Moving on.

Once again, I didn't take the knife. I really gotta see what happens when I enter the basement with it in hand.

The Smitten ranting about how much he loves the Princess to the Narrator and Hero's utter dismay like:

I don't have any comments to make on this exchange other than how hilarious it is and how relatable it feels for someone who's had hallucinations try to talk to real people in the past.

The Hero was pulling out a squirt bottle for the Smitten two minutes ago, but the second the Princess calls him a hero he's competing for the Smitten's title. Peak character right there.

The idea of the Princess having a sort of Narrator instructing her on how to behave and what actions to take / things to say is INSANE and a question I had the second the Narrator told me to go down into that first basement. The immediate deconfirmation is a little saddening, but the Smitten's comment makes me wonder if the one who has reality warping powers here isn't the Princess, but us.

Hear me out. The way we interact with the Princess in the first chapter of every loop seems to dictate what the next Princess will be. It's like our opinion of her shapes what she becomes. She savaged our player character in that very first interaction, and then in the next, she was a wild animal that swallowed us whole. In the chapter preceding the Stranger, we never entered the cabin in the first place. We never met. And when we finally did, she was a fractal of possibilities--- almost as if because we hadn't formed an opinion of her yet.

GIRL HUH. Yeah no she's not real. This is a cardboard cut out with a speaker behind it.

NOPE DON'T LIKE THE FACT THAT THE MUSIC IS VERY MUCH CHANGING.

Hey wait her eyes look different. Am I crazy?

Yeah no a lot more than her eyes are different! The gal is having a crisis of identity that is represented by the art style and that is VERY COOL and also VERY DISTRESSING

Chickened out and didn't press the issue of her having her own wants beyond leaving the cabin beyond a second question. I said that if she wants to leave, then we'll leave, and she was abruptly back to normal. Sweetie you need therapy.

The Smitten just said "We have each other. We don't need the world for our happy ending." and that COULD just be his mushy romanticism showing... but what if it's not?

Turns out the Narrator is the one who's been locking us in the basement 90% of the time, not the cabin itself, or the Princess. When we were locked in, I asked the Princess if she thought she could open the door, and said I believed in her when she asked if I thought she could.

THE POWER OF DATING A MARY SUE Y'ALL

Ultra Princess I'm genuinely so thrilled to hear your terrifying ambience again this princess scares me infinitely more than the ones who gnaw off their arms or eat me please take her away ;w;

FINALLY GOT A SCREENSHOT OF THE ARMS. THIS TIME I WAS READY, HECKERS!!!

Continuing this in the next post. Can't wait to take my next mirror selfie! I'm not scared whatsoever :,D

[destiny-smasher]

DownRight Fierce Dev Update (9/2021)

Not sure if this is something folks here would want to see, but I'll share this update I shared with patrons for the original visual novel I've been working on, DownRight Fierce. It was conceived back in, like, 2014, but since just before the pandemic hit, I've been working on it as a visual novel. It's sort of like...if Street Fighter and Butterfly Soup had a kid? That was born before Butterfly Soup came out? And has been slacking off for a few years? There is a fully playable, mostly presentable demo of the prologue and first three chapters, feel free to contact me if you're interested in trying it out and providing feedback.

Thanks to the support I've received on Patreon lately, I've been able to commission more outfits for the main characters, new expressions, and was able to pay Hayley to re-organize the sprites so I have some more control over mixing and matching different things. We've also implemented a new pose for Nishiko's sprite when they're sending text messages (on their antiquated cell phone).

(all of the character art so far I have commissioned from my friend Hayley Sakura-Rose12)

I ended up deciding to have that sprite made when I implemented a whole text convo with Seiko near the end of Chapter 3. (or partway through the chapter, depending on what the reader chooses - OR they can even skip this conversation altogether, potentially)

The biggest updates to DRF lately have mostly been cosmetic: adding in more facial expressions and effects.

One example of this has been incorpating a more seamless and atmospheric effect for moments when Nishiko gets lost in thought.

There will be a recurring and increasingly important component tied to this, so I'm glad Jenny helped inspire me to pursue this kind of idea. You can also see here a version of Nishiko's sprite which has been visually updated with more texture, alternate color, etc., and that's something she intends to do with the other characters when time allows (she's been very busy for like, over a year now).

Fire and smoke are key visual symbols for Nishiko's character, so Jenny has been helping me figure out ways to express this more through the UI, etc.

(my wife Jenny has worked on the UI, giving it a more gritty look, and she's modified Nishiko's sprite in this image to give extra atmosphere to the character sprites; she also took a placeholder image and did work on it to showcase a potential art style for the backgrounds; we're considering something like this, though maybe including more color, perhaps intentionally depending on the setting)

But it's not just been visual stuff. I've also been adding in extra content, and incorporating more choices and elements that affect and are affected by the stats running in the background.

I've added in new short classroom scenes to help better illustrate Nishiko's experience inbetween social activities, while simultaneously using them to imply elements regarding Nishiko's attention span, as well as flesh out the lore of the world.

I've been a bit inspired by Tuca and Bertie in some weird ways, as well, trying to build lore within my own fighting game inspired world with references that double as, well, world building (like alluding to Street Fighter antagonist M. Bison via a political dictator who existed in this universe's history), including entire chunks of conversation that go in different branches based on weird Capcom humor that also serves to establish backstory.

Nishiko and Kayla bond over love of a dumb cheesy horror flick that's essentially one big meme featuring the 90's Street Fighter cartoon.  The drinks in the vending machines are all Capcom references, but serve as a means of letting the reader more manually increase a stat of their choosing - and since they're vending machines, they recur, so as the reader might get to know what each drink is, they might make a deliberate choice to increase a specific stat on purpose, in a similar way to choosing to exercise, or meditate, or study.

A convo about Nishiko's prior schoolyear incorporates Dark Stalkers references while also, again, letting the reader affect stats in a narratively retroactive way.

I've fleshed out conversations in Chapter 3 to have lots of dialogue most readers won't see in a single playthrough, as well as making more efforts to lean readers toward experiencing certain scenes or moments they might have missed earlier, while allowing the possibility of skipping or missing out on scenes entirely should they choose.

For example, the end of Chapter 3 is focused on Nishiko's relationship with Seiko. There is a text chat convo that can happen in one of two different parts of the chapter, and an in-person convo I'm currently working on (the last planned new content for the demo). Both can be experienced, or one or the other, or the can both be skipped. I don't want to make the entire social life something optional, but I do want to have there be parts like this where the reader can choose to skip interacting with a character if they truly don't want to, to help reinforce the idea that every interaction is, in a sense, a deliberate choice.

Even something like picking 'the BAD' choices is something I want to not just feel like, say, Undertale's infamous 'genocide run' but rather something that is an expression of anger at the world around the main character, which even has some specific benefits - because people don't just become jerks because they like to feel bad, but because it serves them in some beneficial way. As a slight example, if the reader pushes Nishiko to become aggressive, their 'Psycho' stat will increase, which can lead to them having even more aggressive choices later, which further increase that stat. But as that stat increase, Nishiko will become more physically perceptive to certain details about the world around them, but in material ways rather than social ways. For example, they might sense certain inklings of things that allude to later plot points earlier than someone who is more cooperative and might learn more social backstory elements. It's likely not going to be some huge, monumental difference, but it hopefully will make a second playthrough feel noticeably different and give the reader more insight into certain things.

The planned demo will feature the prologue and the first three chapters. By the end, all four main characters will be introduced, and the reader should get a pretty good idea through bits of writing and visual presentation that the choices they make won't change the primary narrative, but will affect certain details and aspects of how things play out. This is actually related to a big plot element itself that will become important later. But for now, it's been really fun adapting content I wrote over five years ago into this format, fleshing it out, and trying to work out ways to not only make that content function better in an interactive format, but also just how to lay more foundation and foreshadowing for what's to come.

While the visuals are still far from finalized even for this demo, I do have a private build uploaded for anyone genuinely interested, as I still haven't received much in the way of feedback so far. I'm planning on releasing a public demo to itchio later on when we can get the visuals to look more finalized.

[bookcoversalt]

Have you noticed the latest edition of Charlie Bowater can only draw one (1) face? She did The Princess Will Save You and Cast In Firelight both YA Fantasy set to be released this year. And they are how you say... the same fucking cover

Ah yes so you saw the same tweet I did

I know I literally just posted that we cannot outlaw book covers from looking like each other, but ! Oof!

The only thing that softens the blow here is that Charlie has improved at representing nonwhite features such that characters look like POC rather than tan white people, although,, that bar was low. Anybody remember the ACOTAR coloring book.

(Would you have guessed that 2/3 of these people are nonwhite? Or even that they’re supposed to be three different men? I guess all the men in Prythian have the same haircut?)

But that minor victory is mostly lost in the quagmires of the fact that Charlie’s style is to give everyone instagram face:

I wouldn’t even call this “Sameface” necessarily: that implies limitation, that an artist is only capable of drawing a single facial structure competently. Bowater is incredibly technically talented, she just chooses to give everyone catlike fae eyes and the cheekbones of a starving nymph. (My previous post on this here.)

But I don’t really blame her for that, or for these hilariously identical, nearly devoid of personality covers. Artists are allowed to do whatever they want. Artists who make art for covers are being art directed by designers and marketing teams who bear responsibility for how the finished pieces turn out.

No, this is our fault, as a community and an industry and..... society, kind of, for valuing character portraits that are “pretty” (“pretty” being an extremely loaded, culturally subjective concept) over art that actually Says Something About The Story. Bowater’s style happens to dovetail perfectly with what we currently collectively find pretty, and so we’ve put her art on a pedestal at the cost of everything else art can or should do for our stories.

And this is understandable: in contemporary western culture, pretty is a value unto itself. Seeing our characters portrayed as pretty denotes them as special, as smart, as powerful. It’s almost impossible to de-program ourselves from that reaction. There are approximately five kajillion studies on how beautiful people are at personal and professional advantages; how they’re perceived to be happier, healthier, more successful, and how those perceptions can translate into realities. (Nevermind how thinness and whiteness enter that equation, see above note about “pretty”.) I would love to see more “average” or weird- looking characters abound (and be accurately visually represented) in the YA/ Genre lit sphere, but for now... everyone is pretty.

Which sometimes means everyone is pretty boring.

But that’s just the specific, "What’s the deal with Bowater’s success in book circles and her style and all the sameiness” part of this equation. What if we backed up and asked: why character art at all? Beyond a question of “pretty”-ness (and general obvious Artistic Quality), why do we gravitate towards it, what's the purpose of it, how does it fall flat in a general sense, and how can it be utilized more effectively?

This is something I think about all the time. I follow writers on social media (because..... I am a writer on social media, regrettably), and we have an enormous collective boner for character art. “Getting fanart [of the characters]” is one of the achievement pinnacles constantly cited when people get or want to get published. Commissioning character art is something we reward ourselves with, or save up for (WHICH IS GOOD AND CORRECT. FREE ART IS GREAT BUT DO NOT SOLICIT IT. PAY YOUR ARTISTS). And like???? Same????? We love our stories because we’re invested in our characters. Most humans, even prose writers, are visual creatures to some extent, and no matter how happy we are with our text-based art, it’s exciting to see our creations exist in that form. So we turn that art into promo material and we advocate for it on our covers-- because it’s so meaningful to us! It goes with the story perfectly!! Look at my dumb beautiful children!!!!!

But on an emotional level, it’s hard to grasp that it only means something to us. Particularly when you take into account the aforementioned vast landscape of beautiful visual blandness of many characters (in the YA/ genre lit sphere, that’s pretty much all I’m ever talking about), character art can be like baby photos. If you know the baby, if that baby is your new niece or your friend’s kid, if you’ve held them and their parent texts you updates when they do cute shit, you’re probably excited to see that baby photo. But unless it’s exceptionally cute, a random stranger’s baby photo isn’t likely to invoke an emotional reaction other than “this is why I don’t get on facebook.”

Seeing art of characters they don’t know might intrigue a reader, but especially if the characters or art are unremarkable-looking, it’s doing a hell of a lot more for the people who already have an emotional attachment to that character than anybody else. And that’s fine. Art for a small, invested audience is incredibly rewarding. But like the parent who cannot see why you don’t think their baby is THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BABY IN THE WORLD???? I think we have trouble divesting our emotional reaction to character art from its actual marketing value, which.... is often pretty minimal. This is my hill to die on #143:

Character portraits, even beautiful ones, are meaningless as a marketing tool without additional context or imagery. 

I love character art! I’m not saying it should not exist or that it’s worthless! Even art that appeals to only the one single person who made it has value and the right to exist. And part of this conversation is how important for POC to see themselves on covers, whether illustrations or stock imagery, particularly in YA/kidlit. I’m not saying character portrait covers are “bad”. 

I am saying that I have seen dozens and dozens of sets of character art for characters who look interchangeable, and it has never driven me to preorder a book. (Also one character portrait for a high-profile 2019 debut that was clearly just a painting of Amanda Seyfriend. You know the one. There’s nothing wrong with faceclaims but lmfao, girl,,,,)

I’m sure that’s not true for everyone! I am incredibly picky about art. It’s my job. There’s nothing wrong with your card deck of cell-shaded boys of ambiguous age and ethnicity who all have the same button nose and smirk if it Sparks Joy for you.

But if your goal is not only to delight yourself, but to sell books, it’s in your best interest to remember that art, like writing, is a form of communication. The publishing industry runs on pitches: querys, blurbs, proposals, self-promo tweets. What if we applied that logic to our visuals? How can we utilize our character design and art to communicate as much about our stories as possible, in the most enticing way?

Social media has already driven the embrace of this concept in a very general sense. Authors are now supposed to have ~ aesthetics. “Picspams” or graphics, modular collages that function as mini moodboards, are commonplace. But the labor intensity and relative scarcity of character art visible in bookish circles, even on covers, means that application of marketing sensibility to it is less intuitive than throwing together a pinterest board.

Since we were talking about it earlier, WICKED SAINTS, as a case study of a recent “successful” fantasy YA debut, arguably owed a lot of its early social media momentum to fanart.

(Early fanart by @warickaart)

The most frequently drawn character, Malachiasz, has long hair, claws, and distinctive face tattoos. WS has a strong aesthetic in general, but those features clearly marked his fanart as him in a way even someone unfamiliar with the book could clearly track across different styles. Different interpretations of his tattoos from different artists even became a point of interest.

(Art by Jaria Rambaran, also super early days of WS Being A Thing)

Aside from distinctiveness, it's a clear visual representation of his history as a cult member, his monstrous powers, and the story’s dark, medieval tone. The above image is also a great example of character interaction, something missing from straightforward portraits, that communicates a dynamic. Character dynamics draw people into stories: enemies-to-lovers, friends-to-lovers, childhood rivals, platonic life partners, love triangles, devoted siblings, exes who still carry the flame-- there’s a reason we codify these into tropes, and integrate that language and shared knowledge into our marketing. For another example in that vein, I really love this art by @MabyMin, commissioned by Gina Chen:

The wrist grip! The fancy outfits! These are two nobles who hate each other and want to bone and I am sold. 

In terms of true portraits, the best recent example I can think of is the set @NicoleDeal did for Roshani Chokshi’s GILDED WOLVES (I believe as a preorder incentive of some kind?): 

They showcase settings, props, and poses that all communicate the characters’ interests, skills, and personality, as well as the glamorous, elaborate aesthetic of the overall story. Even elements in the gold borders change, alluding to other plot points and symbology.

For painterly accuracy in character portraits on covers, I love SPIN THE DAWN. The heroine looks like a beautiful badass, yes, but the thoughtful, detailed rendering of every element, soft textures, and dynamic, fluid composition form a really cohesive, stunning illustration that presents an intriguing collection of story elements.

The devil isn’t always in the details, though: stark, moody, highly stylized or graphic art with an emphasis on textural contrast and bold color and shape rather than representational accuracy can communicate a lot (emotionally and tonally) while pretty much foregoing realism.

The new Lunar Chronicles covers are actually the best examples I found of this (Trying to stay within the realm of existing bookish art rather than branch into All Art Of Human Figures Forever):

Taking cues from styles more typical of the comics and video game industries.  (Games and comics, as visual mediums, are sources of incredible character art and I highly recommend following artists in those industries if you want to See More Cool Art On Your Timeline.)

TL;DR: Character art and design, as a marketing tool (even an incidental one) should be as unique to your story and your characters as possible, and tell us about the story in ways that make us want to read it. I tried to give examples because there are so many ways to do this, and so many different kinds of art, and I could give many more! But I’m bored now. So to circle all the way back:

These are not just bad because they look like each other, although that is embarrassing and illuminating. These are bad covers (although,,,,, PRINCESS is the far worse offender, at least FIRELIGHT suggests a thoughtful cultural analogue) because a desire for Pretty Character Art overrode the basic cover function to tell us about the story. We get no sense of who these people are, what their relationships are, what these books are about beyond the most general genre, or why we might care. The expressions are vague, the characters generic-looking, the compositions uninteresting and the colors failing to be indicative of anything in particular. 

They’re somebody else’s baby pictures.

(And yes, that’s the CRUEL PRINCE font on PRINCESS. I better not have to do a roundup post but it’s on thin fucking ice.)

[flyingfishflopsthings]

PMD 2: Super hero/magic AU ideas

I had an idea and i think it’s fun, but i don’t plan on actually writing it because I have other PMD stories I want to write first, so I’m putting it out here.

In this AU, the Guild is a Hogwarts/Camp Half Blood style institution that teaches those with powers how to wield them and how to help people with them.

like its a kind of boarding school situation, they all live there and have lessons on how to use their powers and stuff. Also has potential for Hijinks and Shenanigans, which is, in my opinion, a vitally imporant and underused part of any story in the explorers games

I think there’s still mystery dungeons, but some of them are like labyrinths under cities, and there can be multiple dungeons in one area, they kind of cross over each other. 

Everyone is human in this AU, but some manifestations of power lead to physical mutations that may allude to the power. For example, Corphish has the power to breath underwater, and has crawfish claws in place of his hands

Powers are very common, lots of people have at least some mild potential, but not everyone wants to use that for guild work. Marrowak, for example, uses his powers to help train others in combat, while Xautu has x-ray vision used for looking in boxes.

sometimes the mutations are the power- Chatot’s power is that he has bird wings that allowed him to fly, until the initial ambush in Brine Cave prevented him from being safely capable of flight.

Guildmaster Wigglytuff is a well known and very powerful hero who retired from active duty along side his sidekick Chatot to run the guild after Chatot’s injury. His powers were initially believed to be simply a basic, but potent super strength, but the attack in Brine Cave unlocked a secondary power that allows him to cause explosions and tremors. His control over this secondary power is less exact, and in times of extreme emotion, can loosen.

having secondary powers is rare but not unheard of, and the two powers aren’t always related. Its more unusual that the power didn’t manifest until late in his career.

The Guild members have a wide range of powers-  Loudred has an enhanced voice that can do damage through its sheer volume, Sunflora has control over plants as well as mild healing abilities, Crogunk is capable of making toxins in his skin and is skilled at martial arts, Chimeco has both Empath and Telekinetic powers, Dugtrio and Diglett both have earth bending powers, and Bidoof’s powers give him beaver traits (not an especially useful power, but he’s trying to make it work)

Team skull might also be a part of the guild idk

The partner, Chimchar in this case (going off of the Anime) has fire powers and desperately wants to join the guild

he finds the hero, Piplup, collapsed on the beach with no memory except the knowledge that this beak and these flippers are DEFIANTLY new. After some experimentation, they find they also have hydrokenis

The two of them decide to join the guild together because Piplup doesnt seem to have anywhere else to go and kind of wants to learn how to control their new powers

Some people have such strong powers that they are considered not entirely human, and more deific, particually as after a certain threshold of power, regardless of their actual ability they become functionally immortal. This is the case with Palkia and Dialga in particular, who are incredibly old, and have taken it upon themselves to maintain the correct workings of Time and Space. 

Grovyle has super speed, as well as very weak earth bending.

Celebi is also functionally imortal but is on the lower end of the power spectrum for that threshold. She is able to send other people back in time, as well as thoughts and information that allow her to manipulate the time stream, but cannot travel back herself.

Dusknoir has control over spirits, which manifest as the Sableye entourage. He is a loyal sidekick to Dialgia out of self-serving necessity.

Team charm are a heroic team headed by Loppuny, who has Super Jumping Powers (think Remy from Taz: C) She maybe has manifested rabbit ears? idk i also like the big hatsune miku ponytales i give her in my design. which ever is more fun is what she has. Gardivouir has claravoient powers, and Medicham has the power of both Very good Punching, as well as mild psychic abilities. 

Lapras is maybe a giant or something in this au? im not really sure how he carrys people. who knows maybe he can shapeshift into a boat. thats pretty cool.

Manaphy is a child Chimchar and Piplup find with strong Hydrokenis, and they can tell he is likely to become one of the deific heros in the future. He has such a strong connection to the ocean he has to raised in it.

idk thats it basically

i think this is a fun au, i came up with the idea after reading a homestuck fic called doc scratch’s school for exeptional puplis or something along those lines

its very good, very fun super school shenangians as well as high stakes

takes place on a moon, very cool. weird mysterys are happening

if you like homestuck you should read it basically

feel free to add more ideas if you have any, i’d love to talk to people about this au!

[winterbites]

(Major JoJo's Bizarre Adventure anime spoiler warning) My review of...

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Stardust Crusaders and Battle in Egypt (I'm counting them as one whole season but as two parts) is, admittedly, my least favorite season of JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. 48 episodes long across the two parts, the show is definitely enjoyable but I personally wouldn't watch it again for anything other than a few cool fights. However, once again showing his viewers just how crazy his work can and will get, Akari makes JoJo's Bizarre Adventure even more bizarre starting with this season. For this review, I'm going going to take both parts into consideration. As usual, I'm going to keep my review as neutral as possible even if Stardust Crusaders isn't a top pick for me.

Unlike its predecessors, Stardust Crusaders has no narrator for the majority of the season, only showing up to speak the occassional thoughts of characters or animals. Akari always keeping things fresh, I think this is good for the show; we're no longer in the past so we don't need a narrator to tell us events as they happen in front of us.

First, I'm going to talk about the new element Akari brings into JoJo's Bizarre Adventure with Stardust Crusaders: Stands. An absolutely badass idea, Akari plays with this new element of the show beautifully. Unlike many other shounen manga/anime, the ability to control a Stand isn't solely about who has the biggest dick energy attack, but instead Akari turns the tables and uses the Stands for strategic battles; this way, it doesn't actually matter who's stronger or weaker, but instead who's smarter (which very much counteracts the art style of buff men quite nicely). Due to the Stands and mental/wit battles instead of physical battles the way it usually is in the shounen genre, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure takes a very unique turn for the better and works incredibly well given the context of the series.

Now lemme tell ya about the intros: I LOVE the both of them, and I'll start with Stand Proud from the first part of the season. So much energy, wonderfully timed visuals and the fantastic 3D-looking 2D animation; there is nothing about this intro that I don't like. It's ranked as my second favorite intro in terms of song choice, is tied for my number one in terms of visuals, and is tied for my favorite in terms of sound effects. The beautifully drawn night sky, the small addition of sketched art, the subtle hints of enemy Stands in the background, and the background constantly changing in such drastic ways are such terrifyingly engaging imagery that it makes me cry tears of happiness. Not to mention the hard to see hint of Dio at the end, only people who are active on-lookers or were shown that he's there at all will see him. I also love that, in the beginning of the intro, you see 5 stars, alluding to our 5 main characters, but then a 6th star appears, which alludes to Holly Joestar still sick in Japan. Also, the physics of Jotaro's chain and shadow is absolutely ravishing, it's little effects like that that really get me going, as well as the gradual breaking of glass at the end of the intro. The entire sequence is a masterpiece by my standards, truly a job well done.

Now, as for the second intro, I don't like it as much as the first one but it's still great in its own right. I adore the mixing of vocals, going from hard rock to the softer sounding male and then mixing them both for a wonderful Ora Ora Ora duet. I lean in towards my computer screen each time I watch the intro because the fast moving visuals are so enrapturing, not to mention you can see subtle changes in the faces of the characters and their body stance between the fast-paced frames. There's even one point where the group is lined up and the beat strikes, quickly switching them out for their Stands before swiftly changing to the next image. I also admire the way the credits are so well integrated into the intro, jumping and spiking along with the enthusiastic beat, emphasizing the song without being in the way. And when Dio uses his ZA WARUDO to stop time during the second version of this intro, I go into orgasmic bliss because it's so awesome; you can even see that piss bucket SMIRK while hearing his soft footfalls and I love it. Once again, there is nothing that I don't love about this intro.

Just like with Phantom Blood, there isn't much I can say about the soundtrack as a whole, but is fantastic in that it reflects the current situation and could easily switch up its beat when a battle turned.

As for the outros, I love Walk Like an Egyptian and its spirited inspiration, beat and vocals (fantastic job by the Bangles). There's no song quite like Walk Like an Egyptian so it's always a win in my book whenever it's used, especially in such a fitting case. I don't really like the second outro because, unlike every other intro/outro of the series, Last Train Home is a more somber or melancholy song, which doesn't really fit the show in my opinion. It's certainly a nice sounding song, but I'm just not crazy about it.

As for the characters, while I don't like them as much as other characters from other seasons, they certainly aren't bad either; we even get to see character development throughout both parts. Some characters become more mature, more level-headed and smarter with situations, and each person is internally unique as exemplified by their Stand. Some were more likable than others but, in general, the cast was pretty damn cool.

Now that I'm done gushing about all the things I love about this season, I'm gonna gush about the things that made me dislike this season more than the others, and I'm gonna start with the female side character Anne. This girl... did absolutely nothing throughout the show. In her defense, she didn't get in the way of the characters, but she didn't do anything for them either. She was even dropped out of the group halfway through the first part of the season, being inconsequential the whole way through. There was also some kind of weird sexualization going about her too: her age is never stated but she's definitely prepubescent (given the dialogue, she's probably 11 or 12 years old) but she had the body of a teenager and fawned over Jotaro. Once again in her defense, young girls fantasizing about older men (I personally enjoy the company of older men as they tend to be financially stable and more responsible) and having more developed bodies compared to their peers isn't odd at all; instead, it's actually very normal and healthy. However, Jotaro is 17, which is a lot older and, generally, the older the man (or woman) is the weirder it gets.

Speaking of sexualizing little girls, I want to turn attention to the Strength Stand user orangutan, Forever. This literal animal had the hots for Anne, and tried to do stuff to her that I can only describe as attempted rape, so that was a thing. Obviously, that's some fucked up shit that wasn't actually necessary to the story since Jotaro found out about Forever anyway and beat the shit out of him.

Next is, once again, Dio's motives. I love Dio, I really do, but he's just not that much of a well-explained character. His goal is explicitly stated this time around: he wants to rule the world. Fantastic, but WHY does he want to rule it? Who knows, it's never said why.

My next problem is with the villains of the show, they all seemed the same and reused to me. While each Stand (expect for two that did legit the exact same thing of stealing souls and putting them into objects) was unique given the user, whenever they were defeated they did one of two things: they either begged for forgiveness, which would always result in getting the snot beat out of them, or they swore their absolute loyalty to Dio (less of them did this) and died. Some of them would run away, but all of them (save for two Stand Users) never made another appearance, so most of them were just throw away characters.

Finally, my biggest problem is with Iggy, the last party member in our group of main characters who showed up at the beginning of Battle in Egypt. I know Akari wanted to make an animal Stand user to be a part of the cast and I know that Iggy was dragged out to Egypt against his will, but that doesn't make him any less of an infuriating character. For nearly the entire season, I absolutely hated Iggy: he was more useless than Anne as he intentionally turned his head the other way when the group was in trouble and/or DYING, he tried to sell Jotaro out to save his own skin as soon as he was introduced, and he had the absolute worst ambition of any of the characters in that he basically just wanted to be a pimp. After getting fucking up by an avian Stand user that totally should have won the fight (the finishing icicle appeared so much more slowly than all the other volleys, plot armor truly is invincible) and getting his leg dismembered, Iggy finally stepped up to the plate that he probably should have been on to begin with and earned my respect. Seriously, why would you so eagerly make an animal Stand user only to not use him for the entire show and then kill him off when he's barely shown what he can do? It makes no sense and it's so frustrating.

However, Akari truly has magic hands because as soon as Iggy actually started doing something, he immediately became a badass in my book and I cried another river to his death.

Speaking of deaths, just as a side note, why kill Avdol, bring him back, only to kill him again? As I understand it, Akari killed off Avdol the first time around but then realized that if he was going to kill a main character, he should probably make that character more important. But then Avdol died again and his death still felt insignificant. A good opportunity to learn on Akari's part, but I feel like bringing Avdol back to life didn't make much sense either.

[luvneedsnosyt]

My Favorite Albums of 2018

Here is my list of my personal top albums of 2018

You can find my separate list for top EPs of 2018 here.

My Previous monthly lists from 2018: January , February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December

My list last year for my top Albums of 2017 can be found here.

*Indicated someone I saw live in 2018

Honorable Mention:

Alan Walker - Different World Genre: Electronic / Dance

Different World is life in a digital universe. On the surface the mechanical synth-based melodies might come off as a bit too artificial, but if you dispel the notion computers can’t be a musical instrument you can see there’s a heartbeat under the churning gears. In the context of the album all the tracks really work together harmoniously, a pretty amazing feat considering these songs were recorded and released over the span of three years. There is a intentional, common vernacular across the tracks that melds it together quite nicely. Despite the plasticity on top, this debut album is artificial intelligence exuding relatable emotion and infectious energy. I don’t know what’s more human than that.

Proof: Lonely (w/ Steve Aoki Feat. ISÁK & Omar Nior) / Darkside (Feat. Au/Ra & Tomine Harket)

Alina Baraz - The Color Of You Genre: alt-R&B / Soul

The soothing and sultry voice of Alina Baraz can seriously sing to me the phone book and I would rock back and forth in a happy place. The world was first introduced to Alina Baraz when she teamed with Danish producer Galimatias for their euphoric, synth-pop joint EP Urban Flora. For her first solo project Baraz goes for a bit more of a stipped down sound which allows her soulful vocals to shine as they whisk you away. This enduring and intimate album shows the future is bright for the singer and her low lit music.

Proof: Fallin / I Don’t Even Know Why Though // Bonus: Feels Right

Chloe x Halle - The Kids Are Alright Genre: alt-R&B

Sisters Chloe & Halle’s talents caught the attention of none other than Beyoncé who scooped them up for her label and now their unique and unpredictable form of R&B is catching the attention of the masses. The sisters broke out on the scene with 2016’s Sugar Symphony EP, followed up by the YouTube released mixtape The Two of Us. This debut album has been in the works since before that original EP was released and with most of the production handled by them is a true culmination of their hard work to get to this point. The hard work is already paying dividends with two GRAMMY nominations including “Best New Artist”.

Proof: Everywhere / Galaxy

CHVRCHES - Love Is Dead Genre: Synth-Pop

On their third album, Love Is Dead, for the first time Scottish band CHVRCHES used outside producers on a record. The result is a bit more expansive of a sound for the group then before. The moments of emotion and energy seem a bit more unhinged (in a good way). Lauren also adjusted her writing techniques from a metaphor heavy style that would allude to subjects to a much more straightforward vocabulary addressing things head on. It’s still the same identifiable vernacular of the band CHVRCHES but with a few new art pieces up on the walls.

Proof: Never Say Die / Miracle

Don Diablo - FUTURE Genre: Electronic / Synth-Pop / Dance

Ten years after his debut, Dutch producer shows by he’s been a sought after producer for nearing twenty years. FUTURE shows how the producer has been able to craft entertaining and contagious pop melodies that resonate ohh so well.

Proof: Take Her Place (Feat. A R I Z O N A) / Found You (Feat. Bully Songs)

J.I.D. - DiCaprio 2 Genre: Hip Hop

J. Cole signee J.I.D. Didn’t waste time following up his 2017 debut album The Never Story. The Atlanta rapper already had a following established from independently released mixtapes and EPs before last year. The Never Story exposed to a wider audience this newcomer has got some lyrical skills and a silky, smooth flow, DiCapro 2 (a sequel to his 2015 DiCaprio EP) only exacerbates the exposure to his talent even more.

Proof: 151 Rum / Tiiied (Feat. 6LACK & Ella Mai)

JMSN - Velvet Genre: R&B / Soul / Funk

The shape shifting R&B of Michigan singer JMSN has been one of my favorites since his 2012 revelation of a debut †Priscilla† (which topped my 2012 albums list). His first album and EP were very much in the hazy low lit alt-R&B sound similar to The Weeknd and How To Dress Well. JMSN then molded his sound to a more straightforward form of R&B for an album. Again, not being complacent, his two following albums transformed again this time to sound like a jazz assemble backing a soul singer. Well, JMSN takes another left turn with Velvet incorporating some sultry funk. With dripping base lines and bouncing synth keys this is JMSN’s most vibrant sound yet.

Proof: Levy / Drama

Kylie Minogue - Golden Genre: Synth-Pop / Country

I am admittedly not a big country fan, and some more die hard country listeners my roll their eyes at me calling this album country. Kylie Minogue is going on 30 years in the industry and mostly been a danceable, synth-pop artist. For her fortieth album Golden, Kylie went to Nashville and incorporated country and bluegrass music tendencies into her sound; something that could be a disastrous ambition. I guess you don’t just luck into making music for three decades, because this interesting mixture is pulled off beautifully. Golden is an effective and innovative mash up of electronic music, synth-pop and country in a surprisingly delicious cocktail.

Proof: Stop Me From Falling / Every Little Part of Me

Logic - YSIV Genre: Hip Hop

With one of the most lethal flows in the game, Logic dropped off two projects in 2018. First was the follow up of his Bobby Tarantino Mixtape. The second was his fourth LP, but this time reviving his Young Senatra persona from mixtapes earlier in his career (the last one came out in 2013). YSIV or as it stands for “Young Sinatra 4” is another verbal assault by the talented rapper and one of his most confident records to date. The robust use of skits and interludes has always been a gripe of mine with Logic albums, and gladly they are noticeably absent here. No matter what persona he dons, Logic has some of the most ferocious lyrical prowess in the industry and he loves to show it off.

Proof: The Return / 1000 Miles & Running (Feat. Wale & John Lindahl)

MNEK - Language Genre: R&B / Electronic

Before this debut album was released British singer/producer/songwriter MNEK already had multiple GRAMMY nominations from his songwriting and production work with artists including Kylie Minogue, MØ, Madonna, Zara Larsson, Julia Michaels, Dua Lipa, Beyoncé and a whole slew of others. With the success of his stellar 2015 EP Small Talk he became a sought after commodity in the industry. For his debut album MNEK wanted to make a statement of who the man behind the boards and pen is. Language is an exhilarating listen front to back and an exciting mixture of intersecting genres.

Proof: Tongue / Colour (Feat. Hailee Steinfield)

SOB X RBE - GANGIN / GANGIN II Genre: Hip Hop

It’s been a busy year for the new hip hop foursome from Vallejo. They dropped their self titled Mixtape in 2017 to catch the attention of Kendrick who put a song by them on the Black Panther soundtrack. Striking while the iron was hot, the group released their debut album in February and their Sophomore album (or an extension of their debut) only a few months later in September. Growing up the Bay Area the group is obviously influenced heavily by the Hyphy movement. You can hear elements of influences from E-40, Keak da Sneak, The Team and others in that Hyphy sound; but with a contemporary twist.

Proof: Anti Social / Can’t // North Vallejo / Made It

Superorganism - Superorganism Genre: Indie Pop

Eight member group from various countries formed the band Superorganism in 2017. Together they would send tracks through Facebook and WhatsApp and each member would add some layers on to it. The concoction is a dense, multifaceted form of unique pop music. The various layers of instruments, synths, and samples intertwine to create a mesh of melodies that bounce along gracefully despite their mass.

Proof: Everybody Wants To Be Famous / Reflections on the Sun

Tove Stryke - Sway Genre: Synth-Pop

This short and sweet album by The Swedish singer is her strongest to date. There’s a subtle growing of confidence I can see from this album to its predecessor 2015’s Kiddo. Despite its short run time, Sway makes quite an enjoyable impression.

Proof: Sway / Mistakes

Typhoon - Offerings Genre: Indie Rock / Alternative

American rock band Typhoon follow up 2013’s White Lighter with their fourth album here. Offerings is a moving and powerful affair. Most of the tracks start off mellow and sweet with moments of crashing guitars and unfiltered emotion bursting out.

Proof: Rorschach / Darker

VanJess - Silk Canvas Genre: R&B / Neo-Soul

The sisters of first generation Nigerian immigrants started singing covers on YouTube before first getting signed way back in 2011. Their debut was worth the weight, Silk Canvas is some infectious forward thinking R&B with subtle nostalgia baked in. You can see influences from the likes of Rihanna, SWV, TLC and others.

Proof: Touch The Floor (Feat. Masego) / Best Believe

Bonus:

Major Lazer - Major Lazer Essentials Genre: Electronic / Dance

Since their debut album Major Lazer has been one of my favorites. Now three albums, multiple EPs and a couple mixtapes later, Diplo has announced a new album in 2019 (10 years after their debut) will be the end of the project for the immediate future as he pursues his other many projects. With this announcement Diplo released this compilation album of greatest hits and a handful of new tracks. My first thought when I gave my original spin through this collection was “damn, Major Lazer just had some gd hits!” Listening in one place to the standout tracks from 2009 to now is an exhilarating and entertaining experience centered around diversity and overflowing passion.

Proof: Blow That Smoke (Feat. Tove Lo) / Know No Better (Feat. Travis Scott, Camila Camila & Quavo) / Watch Out For This (Feat. Busy Signal, The Flexican & FS Green) / Tied Up (Feat. Mr Eazi, RAYE & Jake Gosling)

The List:

Last One Out: NoMBe - They Might’ve Even Loved Me Genre: Alternative / Indie Rock / R&B

German born singer NoMBe is here to seduce you and I say you should let him. They Might’ve Even Loved Me is a steamy collection of rock songs about love, sex and navigating through life. NoMBe’s vocals are subdued and sly enacting a sense of mystery. The backdrops are built on groovy bass lines and plucky guitar riffs meant to get your foot tapping and hips slowly moving. I can see obvious influences from The Killers, Kings of Leon and Prince. Deeper down I also see hints of Blood Orange, Twin Shadow and D’Angelo.

Proof: Young Hearts / Freak Like Me / Jump Right In / Sex

35. Rejjie Snow - Dear Anne Genre: Hip Hop

Hip Hop is usually about being forceful and having to reach out and grab what society has built roadblocks for you to attain. Irish rapper Rejjie Snow is the opposite of that. His subtle, jazzy production is minimalist and doesn’t directly ask for your attention. This allows the mellow, but skilled flow of Rejjie to take the lead. I wouldn’t label Rejjie’s rapping as slow, but it moves at a comfortable and steady pace and doesn’t need to be unnecessarily sped up. With the vibe being so well established, the listener can now comfortably hang onto every lyric which are well written in matters of love and maturing in life we all can identify with.

Proof: Spaceships (Feat. Ebenezer) / Egyptian Luvr (Feat. Aminé & Dana Williams) / Charlie Brown (Feat. Anna of the North) / Annie (Feat. Jesse Boykins III)

34. Kelela - TAKE ME A_PART THE REMIXES Genre: alt-R&B / Electronic

Kelela’s debut album Take Me Apart was one of my favorite albums last year. Her sound that was a mixture of Aaliyah, late 80s Janet Jackson laid over production that would fit on a Massive Attack album was such an enjoyable smooth and sultry listen. Her strong vision of her projects as a whole make for a cohesive listen. That strong vision carries over to this robust remix compilation that is not your average remix album. The diverse range of producers offering remixes make for a dynamic listen that teleport you to various new environments throughout. Kelela was part of the process curating this album with each of the producers, even recording some new vocals here and there if needed. It’s that devotion to her craft that makes me confident Kelela will be a long time.

Proof: KAYTRANADA_WAITIN_115 BPM / LSDXOXO_TRUTH OR DARE_123 BPM / NÍDIA_BLUE LIGHT_123 BPM / BADSISTA_BETTER_125 BPM (Feat. Linn da Quebrada)

33. Whethan* - Life of a Wallflower, Pt. 1 Genre: Electronic / Future Bass / Dance

The most impressive skill in electronic’s wonderkid Whethan’s arsenal is his ability to construct a diverse range of sounds within a genre that usually leads to being in niches. Since he first debuted in 2015 at the age of 16, Whethan had been a producer chameleon making tracks that don’t sounds like the last two or three or anything he released before had. Before this debut album was released he already got to work with the likes of Flux Pavilion, Charli XCX, Elohim, Ashe, MAX & Dua Lipa so his clout is rapidly growing in the industry. That’s from his ability to mold and morph melodies to his will. With apparently another album set to be released on 2019, the young Chicago producer is riding this accent with no end point in sight.

Proof: Radar (Feat. HONNE) / Top Shelf (Feat. Bipolar Sunshine) / Superlove (Feat. Oh Wonder) / Be Like You (Feat. Broods) // Bonus: High (Feat. Dua Lipa)

32. Kali Uchis - Isolation Genre: R&B / Soul

The soulful, vintage sound of Colombian-American Kali Uchis has an appealing and comforting nostalgia while also feeling contemporary and innovative. You can see her influences of 1960s Soul and doo-wop music as well as traditional Colombian music as the vertebrae of her stripped-back sound but also see how she’s molding it to her will to fit in 2018. Her tender voice can bounce along a track so gracefully in her unique melodies creating a dynamic experience despite a minimalist pallet.

Proof: Just A Stranger (Feat. Steve Lacy) / Tyrant (Feat. Jorja Smith) / Dead To Me / After The Storm (Feat. Tyler, The Creator & Bootsy Collins)

31. Mother Mother - Dance and Cry Genre: Indie Rock / Alternative

Canadian Rock band Mother Mother’s sound is an exciting coalesce of Modest Mouse, Arcade Fire and My Chemical Romance. Dance and Cry is a touching record of heartbreak and the hope afterwords. I admittedly haven’t listened to an entire project from Mother Mother before this, their seventh album, so I can’t really offer much history or how their sound may have evolved. However, this was a pleasant surprise when I first took it for a spin that kept surprising me every listen after, so I will personally be paying more attention to the band after.

Proof: Dance and Cry / Get Up / So Down / It’s Alright

30. Vince Staples - FM! Genre: Hip Hop

Long Beach rapper Vince Staples marches to the beat of his own drum with a IDGAF attitude. Seventeen months after releasing my personal favorite album of 2017, Vince is back with a new project; I’m not sure what to call it. Is FM! an album, a mixtape, just a recorded radio show? The thing is Vince could really care less about those questions, he just makes what he wants to. Put together as one radio show where the tracks abruptly end, there’s hosts playing stupid games with callers, quick commercial breaks for other rapper’s projects, the project comes out as an odd but accurate snapshot of 2018. With a run time under 30 minutes this album is like a shot of adrenaline and ends before any lethargic coming down. Staples verses are as strong as ever with the same bouncy beats we’ve known him to find to spit over with his normal laid back vigor.

Proof: Outside! / Relay / FUN! (Feat./ E-40) / No Bleedin (Feat. Kamaiyah)

29. St. Lucia - Hyperion Genre: Synth-Pop

South African frontman and main showrunner of the New York band St. Lucia returns with his lush and decadent pop music meant to overload your senses. St. Lucia has vaulted to the top of my personal bands list since their debut 2013’s When The Night; which led to me seeing them live 4 times in less than 24 months. Hyperion has a little less “pop” for me then it’s two predecessors, but that doesn’t mean it’s not still a joyous piece of tropical, electro-Pop. There’s even a few new wrinkles, like some George Michael inspired Gospel infusion on “Paradise Is Waiting” or the hints of 80′s rock in the margins of “Walking Away”.

Proof: A Brighter Love / Paradise is Waiting / Walking Away / China Shop

28. Joji - BALLADS 1 Genre: alt-R&B

Japanese singer Joji has come a long way from making a silly internet meme to this surprising debut album. Originally known for starting the “Harlem Shake” meme on his YouTune channel; forever making the actual dance from the 90’s forgotten. Sometime a couple years ago he decided to take music as a serious venture. There was some aspects I liked of his 2017 debut EP In Tongues but overall there was something not quite clicking for me. The seemed to be too much focus on the air underwater vibe and not enough on the song crafting. Well that seemed to be ironed out here with a beautiful debut album that has some heart wrenching moments. “SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK” was one of my favorite songs of 2018, and shows the once YouTube jokester can really dig deep and pull out raw emotion on a song.

Proof: SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK / TEST DRIVE / WANTED U / NO FUN // Bonus: SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK (Loud Luxury Remix)

27. ayokay - In The Shape Of A Dream Genre: Electronic / Synth-Pop / Future Bass

Los Angeles based (Detroit born) DJ ayokay drops off his debut LP of sunkissed Electronic music. ayokay is not afraid to deal with some sadness in his songs, but they maintain a danceable vibe, emulating the mask we all wear in public over our emotions. Who’s ready to cry in the club with me?

Proof: Sleepless Nights (Feat. Nightly) / Don’t Wanna Be Your Friend (Feat. Katie Pearlman) / Stay With Me (Feat. Jeremy Zucker) / Half Past You (Feat. Future Jr.)

26. Tash Sultana - Flow State Genre: Indie Pop / R&B / Soul

Step into the lush and picturesque world created by the Australian multi-instrumentalists that is Tash Sultana. Sultana is a solo jam band as all fifteen instruments on the record are played by Tash, who utilizes looping programs to build these vast microcosms of sound. With the sultry vocals the sound is like Erykah Badu mixed with Aaliyah mixed with The Roots. The smooth vibes and dense backdrops take over on Flow State, a record that’s meant to get lost in.

Proof: Big Smoke / Cigarettes / Salvation / Mystik

25. Janelle Monáe - Dirty Computer Genre: R&B / Neo-Soul

Janelle Monáe is on quite a multimedia run right now and I don’t think it will slow down anytime soon. The singer/actor hasn’t technically won an EGOT award yet, but I see her flirting with the achievement soon. Already in two Oscar for Best Picture nominated movies “Hidden Figures” and “Moonlight” (the latter winning), the accomplished singer shows we are only seeing the beginning of her talents. The “G” in the EGOT might not be far off with probably her most comprehensive and impressive album to date Dirty Computer gaining some GRAMMY nominations: including Album of the Year. Dirty Computer is also my personal favorite project from Janelle. She describes it as finding her true authentic self and expressing that more effectively to the world and I can very much see that. She also worked on this album with the late genius Prince before his passing and you can very much see his influences throughout. There’s the airy dancing synths emulating a bit of the later Prince from Art Official Age on “Crazy, Classic, Life”. “Make Me Feel” is dripping with funk similar to something off of 1999. Album closer “Americans” utilizes a empowering soulful keyboard riff that could be taken straight from any of the albums with The Revolution. Despite the heavy influence, Janelle doesn’t use it as a crutch but as a tool to take her sound to a new level. She never loses her strong sense of self though the project, I feel we are finally peeling some of the protective exoskeleton that is Janelle Monáe and learning more about the beautiful and inspirational person beneath.

Proof: Crazy, Classic, Life / Make Me Feel / Like That / Americans

24. Alison Wonderland - Awake / Awake (The Remixes) Genre: Electronic / Synth-Pop

We all are just trying to find our “Happy Place”. Hopefully the therapeutic burst of emotion that is Awake can help Australian DJ Alison Wonderland (real name Alexandra) find her own. With her sophomore album,  I feel Alexandra has really found her voice and that’s with the keen ability to be able to personify the struggles of relationships, self doubt and mental illness for her fans. Usually, emotion within Electronic music is viewed with a level of plasticity to it. There should be no doubt in the genuine passion in Alexandra’s form of electronic music. She may think her admirers should “find someone that’s easier” but I prefer the emotional depth and honesty.

Proof: No / Easy / Church / Awake // Okay (Blush Remix) / No (Paces Remix) / Awake (KRANE Remix) / Easy (Kill Paris Remix)

23. Charli XCX - Pop 2 [Mixtape] Genre: Synth-Pop

Technically released in 2017, but late enough it didn’t make my list last year and got pushed to 2018, Charli returned with her second mixtape in nine months and, for me, my favorite project of hers since her debut album; possibly of her career. Pop 2 is a futuristic electro-pop record where genres are fluid and expression is currency. The thing I feel Charli has sort of unlocked on this project from her past is an ability to really convey emotion through this mechanical pallet she builds her music with. She’s always had a level of passion within her music but outside of a youthful lust and an empowering “fuck everything” the rest of the emotions expressed always felt they were being viewed behind a protective sheet of plexiglass. Songs like “Backseat”, “Lucky” “Tears” and the sneakily genius “Track 10” really show an ability to bring more emotional depth in her songs. Whether it’s in mixtape form (Charli expresses she feels more freedom with mixtapes) or official LPs Charli is showing a growth and maturity in her craft that has me excited for what she may bring in the future.

Proof: Backseat (Feat. Carley Rae Jepson) / Out Of My Head (Feat. Tove Lo & ALMA)  / Unlock It (Feat. Kim Petras & Jay Park) / Track 10

22. Madeaux - Burn Genre: Electronic / Dance

I suggest a good stretch, being well hydrated and grabbing a towel before pressing play on this exhilarating whirlwind of melody calisthenics. The official debut LP from the American producer takes the listener of a dark, immersive experience in a world of non-stop kinetic energy and organized chaos. To all the critiques of Electronic music that say it all sounds the same I kindly point them to this album because there isn’t another producer making house music quite like this out there. Burn is a thrilling, fast-paced ride that doesn’t allow much space for the listener to take a breath until it’s finished. I suggest having a post-workout recovery shake handy for after.

Proof: Like A Model (Feat. Poter Elvinger & WILLS) / Run with It (Feat. Tommy Lee Sparta) / Lights Low (Feat. OG Maco, ALGORY & JRich ENT) / Sweat (Feat. Class Actress & Black Atlass)

21. Twin Shadow* - Caer Genre: Alternative / Indie Pop / R&B

Twin Shadow is an artist who has a recognizable, identifiable sound, yet every album of his also sounds different then the other. His debut, 2010s Forget is a disorienting, hazy dream. A unique mixture of R&B, Alternative music covered in haunting synths and distortions; all with an 80’s nostalgia. 2012’s Confess continues the foggy 80’s vernacular but with a more neon light piercing through. The pounding drums and scratchy guitar riffs are more attention grabbing, and the vocals more pronounced. 2015’s Eclipse was a bit of a statement piece. A whole project of stadium anthems meant to be shouted with vigor and emotion. Caer takes a step back on the arena filler to a more resemble the subtle tone of his debut. Except, the 80’s nostalgia isn’t such a driving factor. This is the project by Twin Shadow that sounds the most like the year it was created in, yet still sounds like any other beautiful Twin Shadow record. A natural progression by the versatile artist.

Proof: Saturdays (Feat. HAIM) / Sympathy (Feat. Rainsford) / When You’re Wrong / Too Many Colors

20. Santigold - I Don’t Want: The Gold Fire Sessions [Mixtape] Genre: Indie Pop / Dancehall

Impossible to be confined in one box, Santigold continues her genre hoping she’s made a career of. I Don’t Want is a dancehall inspired mixtape she worked on for the majority during a two week session with the main producer Dre Skull. By stripping the album moniker, there’s a looser and improvised feeling to the project that lends itself well to the culture it is inspired by. You feel Santigold’s admiration for the Afro-Caribbean influenced sound which makes the joy expressed on the album transparently genuine and infectious.

Proof: Run the Road / I Don’t Want / Why Me / Don’t Blame Me (Feat. Shenseea)

19. Matoma - One In a Million Genre: Electronic / House / Dance

Norwegian producer Matoma wants to cast a wide net with his sophomore album here. Both musically and audience-wise. One In A Million is an eclectic electronic music album that not only crosses sub-genres but crosses oceans with its worldly inspirations. From Synth-pop, to trap, to Tropical House, to Reggaeton, Matoma clearly wants to show off his range and diverse interests. One of the best songs of the year was the gospel inspired “Sunday Morning”. I dare anyone to know breakout in uncontrollable dancing when the bellowing hook of that song comes in.

Proof: Sunday Morning (Feat. Josie Dunne) / Lights Go Down (Feat. James Newman) / False Alarm (Feat. Becky Hill) / Heartbeats (Feat. Nina Nesbitt) // Bonus: Sunday Morning [Zookëper Remix] Feat. Josie Dunne

18. RÜFÜS DU SOL - SOLACE Genre: Synth-Pop / Electronic

When lead singer Tyrone croons for someone to take him to a new place on “New Sky” I can’t help but think “dude we already are somewhere new”. Because that’s exactly what the Australian trio’s atmospheric music does, whisks me away on a magic carpet of melodic keyboards, floating synths, pulsating drums and haunting vocal samples. Their previous album, Bloom was a breakthrough for them and their unassuming electronic music to a more worldwide audience. SOLACE takes an even more self-effacing and introspective approach, but should only help them continue to gain admirers.

Proof: New Sky / Lost in My Mind / No Place / Underwater

17. Nao - Saturn Genre: alt-R&B / Neo-Soul

The delicate voice of Nao returns with her smooth and tender sophomore album. Nao’s debut album For All We Know was one of my top five albums of 2016. Saturn picks up right where it’s predecessor left off but with a slight pumping of the breaks. Saturn take a bit more of a traditional R&B approach but in the same pallet Nao has been working on her whole career. The subtle infusion of electronic music still is present building an enthralling drama across the album. The slower tempo leads to a slightly more intimate feeling on this album then before. In the early 2000s R&B was sent to the margins a bit but with 2012’s House Of Balloons and channel.ORANGE being the inflection point R&B has been growing again in the mainstream. Artists like London’s Nao are in the forefront of R&B’s ascent.

Proof: Another Lifetime / Make It Out Alive (Feat. SiR) / Curiosity / Drive and Disconnect

16. Said The Sky - Wide-Eyed Genre: Electronic / Future Bass

American producer Said The Sky drops his first ever full length project that was a long time coming. For those familiar with his early work there is quite a progression from his more dubstep beginnings to this more melodic vernacular. Being a trained pianist Said The Sky’s backing usually starts with a piano riff. Early on this piano riff was used more as a contrasting element; a calming and tender character to then get smacked around by the boisterous and raucous dubstep. Now the piano is utilized more for it’s rhythm as the backbone of the track; a strong complimentary piece rather then contrasting. This is an evolution I personally feel for the better here leading to a sophisticated and potent electronic album, brooding with a surprising amount of emotion and introspection.

Proof: Show & Tell (Feat. Claire Ridgely) / All I Got (w/ Kwesi) / Over Getting Over You (Feat. Matthew Koma) / Superstar (w/ Dabin Feat. Linn)

15. My Brightest Diamond - A Million and One Genre: Synth-Pop / Electronic / Indie Pop

Multi-Instrumentalist My Brightest Diamond has been a shapeshifter her entire career and that continues here with her fifth album. Starting out as a classically trained violinist and then self teaching herself more and more instruments and incorporating new genres in her sound every new project. For A Million and One she takes on Electronic/Dance music in a subtle and euphoric way. Most of the tracks are mid to slower tempo with free flowing synths and and 808 kicks. More dynamic moments are strategically planted throughout like the slow building “Champagne” or the explosive “Supernova”. A Million and One is an subtle, spectacle piece of electro-pop, that straps the listener in and shots them into the stars.

Proof: It’s Me On The Dance Floor / Champagne / Supernova / White Noise

14. Meg Myers* - Take Me To The Disco Genre: Alternative / Rock

I don’t really know how I happened upon Meg Myers music back in 2012, before her debut EP even was released, but I sure am grateful I did. Following the path of her career from that 2012 EP Daughter In The Choir to now has been quite rewarding. Every year new music has been released by Meg the project always is one of my favorites for the year, but Take Me To The Disco is finally her letting all the outside pressure and expectations go and just rocking the fuck out. Switching labels and making music separate from her long time producer Doctor Rosen Rosen, Meg had a newly found freedom on this record which led to a ride full of high, lows and moments of raw unfiltered emotion. Part of Meg’s unique skill when crafting a song is her ability to go from a soft, raspy and unassuming tone to a passion filled roar in seconds. The music knew when to follow suit as well with the main enclosures being acoustical and warm environments with alcoves of thunderous drums and crashing guitars. Whether it’s tranquil moment of vulnerability or impacting pockets of intensity and fierceness, Meg has a newly discovered level of confidence and power.

Proof: Numb / Tear Me To Pieces / Jealous Sea / Done

13. MØ - Forever Neverland Genre: Synth-Pop

For some, the ascension of MØ may have seemed pretty sudden. The mega success that was Major Lazer & DJ Snake’s “Lean On” featuring the Danish singer came a bit out of nowhere to some. I smuggly could say I predicted such an explosion since my introduction or her on Avicii’s “Dear Boy” followed up closely by her 2013 debut EP Bikini Daze. MØ didn’t feel a need to rush things despite the iron being hot as shit and took her time following up her 2014 full length album No Mythologies To Follow. Instead she dropped stellar one-off singles “Kamikaze” “Final Song” “Drum” and “Nights With You” before finally releasing last years EP When I Was Young. Forever Neverland continues on the maturity in her music desolated on her EP of last year. The hooks are still catchy as shit, her sound still has an ability to make you want to get up and move, but there is a further depth in her songs. MØ’s voice always was expressive and emotive but there was also a glossy surface layer that seems to have been stripped away over the years. She now has the confidence to let her voice scratch and wain a bit when a line carries more emotional weight. 

Proof: Way Down / I Want You / Beautiful Wreck / Red Wine (Feat. Empress Of)

12. Elohim - Elohim Genre: Electronic / Synth-Pop / Dance

The mysterious Elohim has became a go-to collaborator for electronic music projects over the last few years. From Louis The Child, Oliver, Ekali, The Glitch Mob and others, Elohim’s name would pop up; usually on the album’s best track. Her soft and delicate voice always worked great as a juxtaposition to the often kinetic backgrounds. In her solo music, she is her own producer and she shows she is more than just a featured artist but also a contemporary to the other Electronic producers. Elohim is a diverse and incredibly dynamic piece, which surprises the listener with unexpected vocal samples or instrument riffs used in sophisticated ways. Whether is a mariachi horn, trumpet, violin, guitar, or just odd vocal cadences looped, Elohim has developed creative and unique techniques in her production that make a familiar yet singular sound.

Proof: The Wave / Sleepy Eyes (w/ Whethan) / Fuck Your Money / Half Love // Bonus: Eclipse / Connect (w/ Skrillex)

11. Fakear - All Glow Genre: Electronic / Future Bass

French producer Fakear is a newer discovery for me but boy and I glad I found his atmospheric electronic music. Fakear will be quickly compared to ODESZA and the similarities in their sounds are definitely apparent. However, the French DJ’s harmonious music has a bit more of an airy bounce, with some Tropical House infusion. The electronic genre is having a bit of a moment right now yet Fakear is still relatively not well know in the States. I don’t really see that lasting too long though as more find his music.

Proof: Something Wonderful (Feat. Ana Zimmer) / Lost In Time (Feat. Polo & Pan, Noraa & Clement Bazin) / Sacred Feminine (Feat. Ibrahim Maslouf) / Vision (Feat. Claire Laffut)

10. Pusha-T - DAYTONA Genre: Hip Hop

The Clipse debut album Lord Willin’ came out my freshman year of high school and was a very important album for me. Label issues unfortunately led to more mixtapes than albums released by the brother duo before Malice left the group. Luckily Pusha would eventually find himself on Kanye’s record label as his new home. His first two albums released on the record label were both good, but there must be something in the Wyoming air during the recording of this stellar album. As the first of five Kanye West produced albums released during the “Wyoming Sessions” no one really knew what to expect. Kanye’s erratic behavior leading up to the release left a lot of people side eyeing the whole group of projects. Then about 36 seconds into the opening track “If You Know You Know” when after a fiery verse from Pusha, the industrial beat drops, everyone gets an unexpected slap in the face. This is still one of the best producers in the world and we have one of the best lyricists rapping heat over this production. DAYTONA is quite the 20 minute tornado of an album. A focused and concise offering that does what it needs to do and leaves efficiently. Unfortunately, the rest of the “Wyoming Sessions” albums will be a bit of a mixed bag and Kanye’s erratic behavior on continues causing concern for his mental well being. DAYTONA shines bright as the most cohesive and sturdy of those albums with “If You Know You Know” being the best song to come from the whole session. With GRAMMY nominations and ending up at the top of many writers “Year End Lists” it’s time Pusha finally gets his shine Lord WIllin’ seemed to promise, only 16 years later.

Proof: If You Know You Know / The Games We Play / Come Back Baby / Santeria / Infrared

9. The 1975 - A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships Genre: Indie Rock / Alternative / Synth-Pop

Through their first two albums, The 1975 was a band I enjoyed, but also wanted to enjoy more then I actually did. Their 2013 self titled debut album was an entertaining and engaging soiree of synth-pop and alternative music as a new aged love child of The Killers and My Chemical Romance. There was a definite growth and increased dexterity in their second album, 2016’s I like it when you sleep, for you are so beautiful yet so unaware of it, as the same influences are present but with a sprinkling of seduction and soul. What always took me out of their projects though was their abundance of influences often working against them. The projects missed a level of connectivity I desire. I appreciated the daring nature of the band to explore but some of those swings didn't feel fleshed out enough to connect completely in the context of the albums. When I first heard one of my favorite songs of 2018 “Love It If We Made It”, I thought something seemed different. It seems the band has finally discovered the missing ingredient; or maybe found the excess ingredient(s) to leave out. A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships is a masterful mixture of experiences and influences with a message really cemented in 2018. The experimentations are a bit more radical, but very strategic and only help build up the motif of the whole album. You can still hear the underlying emo-rockers heartbeat from their debut but this time ran through a Bon Iver inspired auto-tune. The themes of how technology can dictate our lives for better or worse give the whole album a context for any listener to identify with. Songs like “Settle Down” and “Somebody Else” from their first two albums were still in 2018 go-to songs for me; the talent was always there. Seeing the band develop and evolve to make this elaborate project is quite the feat to be respected and admired.

Proof: Give Yourself A Try / Love It If We Made It / I Like America & America Likes Me / Sincerity Is Scary / It’s Not Living (If It’s Not With You)

8. 3LAU - Ultraviolet / Ultraviolet (Remixed) Genre: Electronic / Progressive House / Dance

It’s been a long time coming for American DJ 3LAU (Justin David Blau) to finally release this blistering debut. First winning a remix competition for a Tiësto song in 2011, 3LAU made a name for himself over the years as a remix and mashup DJ; intermittently dropping one-off singles here and there. Ultraviolet shows the wait was well worth it. Being a multi-instrumentalist, 3LAU developed his own manipulation techniques of his instrument riffs and vocal samples creating lush melodic environments within his music. The result is a picturesque form of house music that can easily whisk you away in it’s vast, sparkling habitats.

Proof: Touch (Feat. Carly Paige) / Fire (w/ Said The Sky Feat. NÉONHÈART) / Walk Away (Feat. Luna Aura) / Star Crossed / You Want More (Feat. MAX) // Touch [Zeds Dead Remix] (Feat. Carly Paige) / On My Own [3LAU Electro Remix] (Feat. Nevve) / Star Crossed [3LAU DnB Remix] / Walk Away [Hibell Remix] (Feat. Luna Aura) / Fire [Paris Biohm Remix] (w/ Said The Sky Feat. NÉONHÈART)

7. Lykke Li - so sad so sexy Genre: Pop / R&B

Since her debut album in 2008, the vulnerable music of Lykke Li has been a staple in my headphones. I have enjoyed her delicate voice, always ripped with so much emotion matching the impacting lyrics dealing with love and heartbreak. Li’s previous album, I Never Learn was an onslaught of slow and gorgeous, stadium-pop ballads meant to be felt while singing along with at the top of your lungs. The listless themes are continued but this time the album’s expression is more with a glossy, sexy R&B persona; a change I personally am really feeling. With hints of The Weeknd and Rihanna as influences so sad so sexy is Lykke Li’s most sensual sound, one that suits her unique voice and songwriting well.

Proof: hard rain / deep end / sex money feelings die / so sad so sexy / better alone

6. Her - Her Genre: Alternative / Indie Rock/ Soul

Starring an upcoming tragedy in the face, the smooth French duo didn’t waiver or turn to negativity. Instead they focused on life and love. With one of the duo diagnosed with a terminal cancer, together Victor and the ill Simon carefully plotted out their debut album. They released two EPs the previous two years with standout tracks including “Five Minutes”, “Quite Like” and “Swim” which served as a strong introduction to the world, but Simons unavoidable death at age 27 was in August of last year. With the careful pre-planning Victor was able to finish the debut album in his best friend’s memory. Her is a sultry and warm affair. Simon’s bouncy guitar playing, Victors ominous key tones with both of their soft yet confident vocals create a free flowing and sexy sound that is very gracious and admiring of its female muse. Every song has an understatedness to it while it subtly exudes its passion. It’s unknown if Victor will carry on with Her without his best friend, but I am glad they were able to add this exclamation point to Simon’s life.

Proof: Five Minutes / Blossom Roses / Neighborhood / Wanna Be You / Swim (Feat. ZéFire)

5. Bishop Briggs* - Church Of Scars Genre: R&B / Soul / Pop

London born, with Scottish heritage, Bishop Briggs bursts on the scene with this debut album like a strategic boxer. Starting every song with subtle body blows to connect with a potent haymaker every chorus. Her main weapon is a dominant voice that every chorus she lets loose to acts as an imposing yet engaging flex of emotion and power. Born Sarah McLaughlin, Briggs took the name of her parents Scotland hometown as her stage name to not be confused with the well known Canadian singer whose music you hear on sad commercials about puppies. McLaughlin moved around in her childhood from London to Tokyo to Hong Kong to LA and has picked up an amalgamation of influences to use at her disposal in her music. One of the biggest musical influence apparent is her cerebral use of gospel music. Utilized as a form of strength and command at every hard hitting chorus drop which gives room for her tremendous voice to punch your ear drums like a boxing bag.

Proof: Tempt My Trouble / White Flag / River / Hallowed Ground / The Fire

4. DJDS - Big Wave More Fire Genre: Synth-Pop / R&B / Electronic

Timing can be a fickle thing. Sometimes by the slimmest of margins it can go against you, or go in your favor. DJDS’s career seems to be capitalizing on some impeccable timing that is all going in their favor at the moment. First, back in 2016, while finishing up their sophomore album, the LA producing duo were invited to work on Kanye West’s The Life of Pablo album; eventually earning them a GRAMMY nomination. This monster co-sign would help open doors they never had open in their previous years making music. In the two years they spent making this album they collaborated with people that eventually would break out on their own including Empress Of, Amber Mark, Marco McKinnis and Khalid. Those two years are summed up in this fascinating piece of genre blending music. There are moments of bouncy hip hop, sinuous Synth-Pop, Soulful R&B, scenic Indie Pop and fist pumping electronic dance.  Big Wave More Fire at times is as infectious as any other pop album and at times can be a bit artistically challenging to the listener, yet never loses its strong sense of place.

Proof: Trees On Fire (Feat. Amber Mark & Marco McKinnis) / Why Don’t You Come On (Feat. Empress Of & Khalid) / I Get By (Feat. Amber Mark & Vory) / Pick Me Up (Feat. Kelly Zutrau, Vic Mensa & Vory) / Falling (Kelly Zutrau & Marco McKinnis)

3. Kasbo* - Places We Don’t Know Genre: Electronic / Synth-Pop / Future Bass

ODESZA is building quite a roster on their Foreign Family Collective label including the 23 year old Swedish producer Kasbo. With his debut album here, Kasbo shows he’s more than deserving of being part of this collective with this sonic display of dexterity in melody. Places We Don’t Know is an an album that knows it’s comfort zone and is confident enough to never deviate while also avoiding diluting itself. The glossy electronic textiles that stitch the album together track to track build a cohesiveness that makes it a front to back enjoyable experience; without any drop in quality filler. More exploration in the sound may be desired in future releases to avoid sounding stale, but in terms of a debut this pleasant project introduces him nicely.

Proof: Your Tempo / Aldrig Mer (Feat. TENDER) / Roots (Feat. Amanda Fondell) / Over You (Feat. Frida Sundemo) / Bleed It Out (Feat. Nea)

2. Jacob Banks* - Village Genre: R&B / Soul

The initial and most jarring entity you feel when you enter the universe that is Jacob Banks’ music is the gravitational pull that is his empowered voice. The British singer’s raspy and authoritative vocals can relay both a confident strength and introspective vulnerability in one tone. You are able to personally feel the emotion behind every note that leads to a compelling listen no matter how many times before you’ve heard the song playing.

Banks backs up his mighty voice with equally potent and diverse backings. Some of the songs come equipped with thunderous bass lines and percussions with light keys tap dancing among the turmoil. Some take a more straightforward approach with light and jazzy horns and funky grooves. Then some songs have transparent backdrops that almost go away completely, stripped down to a bare pallet for Jacob to command.

Whatever the situation Banks’ vocal prowess prevails. I predict the accent to continue and at a more exponential pace as more become familiar with the impressive singer.

Proof: Chainsmoking / Love Ain’t Enough / Prosecco / Be Good To Me (Feat. Seinabo Sey) / Unknown (To You)

1 Kendrick Lamar & Top Dawg Entertainment - Black Panther The Album - Music From And Inspired By [Motion Picture Soundtrack] Genre: Hip Hop / R&B

It’s probably getting pretty anticlimactic having Kendrick 1st or 2nd on my lists every year. But for the fourth year in a row Kendrick finds himself here again. Black Panther was one of 2018’s greatest cinematic achievements and smartly they looked to Kendrick to make a vivid and dynamic soundtrack to match.

Kendrick shows he has his finger on the pulse for Hip Hop and R&B in 2018 enlisting some of today’s best including The Weeknd, Vince Staples, Anderson .Paak, Travis Scott and of course members of his TDE crew ScHoolboy Q, Ab-Soul, SZA and others. He grabs some of today’s best up and comers with Khalid, Jorja Smith and SOB X RBE. Surprises us with a couple unexpected James Blake features. And finds some new international artists not very well known in Saudi, Babes Wodumo and an absolute fire verse from Yungen Blakrok.

I cannot express how perfect of a curated Soundtrack this is. The music is diverse enough to cast a wide net but also has an underlying and unifying vernacular throughout to make one cohesive project. The production is rooted in African sounds with poly-rhythmic percussion and themes inspired by African ancestry as well as themes incorporated from the movie itself. Kendrick may or may not have been physically there during most of these recordings but you can feel his direction and influence throughout. His impact is not overpowering or controlling either but rather a supportive and inspiring collaborator that keeps the various ships steered in the correct converging direction. When a o-k but also phoned-in verse by Future is really the album’s low point, you know you’ve done something right.

Most may point to the crowd pleasing (and for good reason) songs like “All The Stars” with SZA and “Pray For Me” with The Weeknd as their album highlights but mine is the sneaky vigorous Vince Staples and Yung Blakrok featured “Opps”, that has quite the bite with it’s bark.

My admiration for Lamar is well documents on this blog. He really is controlling the way progressive and impacting hip hop can grow. Drake may have the numbers, but Kendrick is the more commanding artistic virtuoso making music in 2018. Kendrick knows it damn well and uses T’Calla as a metaphor for his spot on the throne of Hip Hop in the album opener: “Because the king don’t cry, king don’t die, king don’t lie, king give heart, king get by, king don’t fall. Kingdom come, when I come, you know why…”

Proof: Kendrick Lamar & SZA - All The Stars / ScHoolboy Q, 2 Chainz, Saudi & Kendrick Lamar - X / Khalid & Swae Lee - The Ways / Vince Staples, Yugen Blakrok & Kendrick Lamar - Opps / Jorja Smith - I Am / Ab-Soul, Anderson .Paak & James Blake - Bloody Waters / Zacari & Babes Wodumo - Redemption / The Weeknd & Kendrick Lamar - Pray For Me

Others:

Good:

Above & Beyond - Common Ground, Action Bronson - White Bronco, Albin Lee Meldau - About You, Alessia Cara - The Pains of Growing, Allan Rayman - Harry Hand-On, alt-J - Reduxer, Ambrose Akinmusire - Origami Harvest, Aminé - ONEPOINTFIVE [Mixtape], Amnesia Scanner - Another Life, anaïs - before zero, Anderson East - Encore, Anderson .Paak - Oxnard, Ann Marie - Tripolar, Anne-Marie - Speak Your Mind, Apollo Brown & Joell Ortiz - Mona Lisa, Apollo Brown & Locksmith - No Question, Aquilo - ii, Arctic Monkeys - Tranquility Baseu Hotel & Casino, Ariana Grande - Sweetener, A$AP Rocky - TESTING, Atmosphere - Mi Vida Loca, Audio Push - Cloud 909, August Greene - August Greene, Ava Luna - Moon 2, Bad Gyal - Worldwide Angel, Bas - Milky Way, Bazzi - COSMIC, Bea Miller - Aurora, Beach House - 7, Beacon - Gravity Pairs, Bebe Rexha - Expectations, Bekon - Get With The Times, Belly - IMMIGRANT, Big Red Machine - Big Red Machine, Birdman & Jacquees - Lost at Sea 2, Bishop Nehru - Elevators: Act I & II, Bishop Nehru - Emperor’s Nehru Groove [Mixtape], Black Atlass - Pain & Pleasure, The Black Eyed Peas - MASTERS OF THE SUN VOL. 1, Black Milk - FEVER, Black Thought & Salaam Remi - Streams of Thought Vol. 2, The Blaze - DANCEHALL, 6LACK - East Atlanta Love Letter, Blood Orange - Negro Swan, Blu & Nottz - Gods in the Spirit, Titans In The Flesh, B.o.B. - NAGA, Bob Moses - Battle Lines, Bobby V - Electrik, Boogie wit da Hoodie - International Artist, BØRNS - Blue Madonna, Boy Pablo - Soy Pablo, The Breeders - All Nerve, Brez - The Grl., BROCKHAMPTON - iridescence, BROCKHAMPTION - Saturation III, Buddy - Harlan & Alondra, Bun B - Return if the Trill, Camila Cabello - Camila, Camp Cope - How To Socialize & Make Friends, Capital Cities - Solarize, Car Seat Headrest - Twin Fantasy, THE CARTERS (Jay-Z & Beyoncé) - EVERYTHING IS LOVE, Cardi B - Invasion Of Privacy, Cat Power - Wanderer, City Girls - Girl Code, City Girls - PERIOD, Chance The Rapper & Jeremih - Merry Christmas Lil’ Mama Re-Wrapped [Mixtape], Chanti Darling - RNB, Vol. 1, Charlie Puth - Voicenotes, Chelsea Jade - Personal Best, Choker - Honeybloom, Chromeo - Head Over Heels, Chris Dave and the Drumhedz - Chris Dave and the Drumhedz, Christina Aguilera - Liberation, Christine and the Queens - Chris, Chrome Sparks - Chrome Sparks, Claptone - Fantast, Clean Bandit - What Is Love?, Cloud Nothings - Last Building Burning, CloZee - EVasion, Col3trane - BOOT, Courtney Barnett - Tell Me How You Really Feel, Cozz - Effected, Craig David - The Time Is Now, Curren$y, Freddie Gibbs & The Alchemist - Fetti, Cut Chemist - Die Cut, Cypress Hill - Elephants on Acid, CZARFACE & MF Doom - CZARFACE Meets Metal Face, Dashboard Confessional - Crooked Shadows, Dave East - P2, David Guetta - 7, Death Cab for Cutie - Thank You for Today, The Decemberists - I’ll Be Your Girl, Denzel Curry - TA13OO, Dillon Francis - WUT WUT, The Diplomats - Diplomatic Ties, Dirty Projectors - Limp Lit Prose, DJ Critical Hype - The DAMN. Chronic [Mixtape], DJ ESCO - Kolorblind, DJ Luke Nasty - Cruise Control, DJ Koze - Knock Knock, DJ Mustard & RJmrLA - The Ghetto, Django Django - Marble Skies, Dr. Octagon - Moosebumps: An Exploration Into Modern Day Horripilation, Domo Genesis & Evidence - Aren’t You Glad You’re U [Mixtape], Drake - Scorpion, Durand Jones & The Indications - Durand Jones & The Indications, Earl Sweatshirt - Some Rap Songs, E^ST - Life Ain’t Always Roses, EDEN - virtigo, Eligh - Last House on the Block, Elephante - Glass Mansion, Elephante - Glass Mansion Remixes, Ella Mai - Ella Mai, Elley Duhé - DRAGON MENTALITY, Emily Warren - Quiet Your Mind, Eric Bellinger - Eazy Call, Estelle - Lovers Rock, Everything Is Recorded - Everything Is Recorded, Evidence - Weather or Not, Excision - Apex, Exitmusic - The Recognitions, E-40 & B-Legit - Connected and Respected, E-40 - Gift Of Gab, Family of the Year - Goodbye Sunshine, Hello Nighttime, Father John Misty - God’s Favorite Customer, Fat Tony & J.KELR - Full Circle, Felix Jaehn - I, FELIX SANDMAN - EMOTIONS, Fischerspooner - Sir, First Aid Kit - Ruins, Flatbush Zombies - Vacation In Hell, Florence + The Machine - High As Hope, Francis & The Lights - Just For Us, Franz Ferdinand - Always Ascending, Freddie Gibbs - Freddie, Fre$h - frēsh•ism, Future & Juice WRLD - Future & Juice WRLD Present… WRLD ON DRUGS, G-Eazy - The Beautiful & Damned, Getter - Visceral, Ghostface Killah - The Lost Tapes, The Glitch Mob - See Without Eyes, The Go! Team - SEMICIRCLE, The Good, The Bad & The Queen - Merrie Land, Gorgon City - Escape, Gorillaz - The Now Now, Greta Van Fleet - Anthem of the Peaceful Army, GRIP - PORCH, Gunplay - ACTIVE, Half Waif - Lavender, Hinds - I Don’t Run, Hollie Cook - Vessel of Love, HONNE - Love Me / Love Me Not, How To Dress Well - The Anteroom, Hovvdy - Cranberry, Hybrid - Light of the Fearless, Ice Cube - Everything Corrupt, IDK - IDK & Friends :), Illa J - John Yancey, Illenium - Awake (Remixes), I’m With Her - See You Around, Imagine Dragons - Origins, The Internet - Hive Mind, Interpol - Marauderm, J. Cole - KOD, Jackie Hill Perry - Crescendo, Jacquees - 4275, Jacques Greene - mixtape [Mixtape], Jade Novah - All Blue, Jaden Smith - The Sunset Tapes: A Cool Tape Story [Mixtape], Jain - Souldier, James Bay - Electric Light, Janine - 99, Janine The Machine - High Places, Jauz - The Wise and The Wicked, Jay Park - Ask Bout Me, Jay Rock - Redemption, Jean Deaux - Krash, Jedi Mind Tricks - The Bridge and the Abyss, Jeff Tweedy - WARM, Jericho Jackson - Khrysis & Elzhi are Jericho Jackson, Jess Glynne - Always In Between, Jessie Reyez - Being Human In Public, Jim Jones - Wasted Talent, Joey Purp - QUARTERTHING, Jonas Blue - Blue, Jorja Smith - Lost & Found, Juice WRLD - Goodbye & Good Riddance, Jungle - For Ever, Justin Timberlake - Man of The Woods, Justine Skye - ULTRAVIOLET, Kacey Musgraves - Golden Hour, Kalin White - Why You Still There?, Kamasi Washington - Heaven and Earth, Kanye West - ye, Kash Doll - Brat Mail [Mixtape], Kayzo - OVERLOAD, Keith Sweat - Playing For Keeps, Kevin Gate - Luca Brasi 3, Keys N Krates - Cura, K.Flay - Everywhere is Somewhere, KIDS SEE GHOSTS (Kanye West & Kid Cudi) - KIDS SEE GHOSTS, Kimbra - Primal Heart, King Tuff - The Other, Kirk Knight - IIWII, The Knocks - New York Narcotics, Kodaline - Politics of Living, Kodie Shane - Young HeartThrob, Kooley High - Never Come Down, The Kooks - Let’s Go Sunshine, KR - In Due Time, Kygo - Kids In Love (Remixes), KYLE - Light of Mine, Lacrae & Zaytoven - Let The Trap Say Amen, Lake Street Drive - Free Yourself Up, Lane 8 - Little By Little, LANY - Malibu Nights, LAUREL - DOGVIOLET, Lauv - I met you when I was 18. (the playlist), Leikeli47 - Acrylic, Lenny Kravitz - Raise Vibration, Leon Bridges - Good Thing, Let’s Eat Grandma - I’m All Ears, Lily Allen - No Shame, Lil Peep - Come Over When You’re Sober, Pt. 2, Lil Wayne - The Carter V, Lissie - Castles, Little Mix - LM5, Lo Moon - Lo Moon, Logic - Bobby Tarantino II [Mixtape], Loyd - Tru LP, LP - Heart to Mouth, Lucy Dacus - Historian, Lupe Fiasco - DRAGOS WAVE, Lyrics Born - Quite A Life, Mac Miller - Swimming, MAJOR. - Even More, Major Lazer - Afrobeats [DJ Mix], Mariah Carey - Caution, Mario - Dancing Shadows, Marion Hill - Unusual, Marsha Ambrosius - Nyla, Marshmello - Joytime II, Masego - Lady Lady, Masta Ace & Marco Polo - A Breukelen Story, Matthew Dear - Bunny, Mayorkum - The Mayor of Lagos, Medasin - Irene, Meek Mill - Championship, Melody’s Echo Chamber - Bon Voyage, Meshell Ndegeocello - Ventriloquism, Method Man - Meth Lab 2: The Lithium, Metric - Art of Doubt, MGMT - Little Dark Age, Mick Jenkins - Pieces of a Man, The Midnight - Kid, Migos - Culture II, MihTy - MIH-TY, Mike Shinoda - Post Traumatic, Mike WiLL Made-It - Creed II: The Album (Music Inspired by the Motion Picture), Mikky Ekko - FAME, Mimicking Birds - Layers Of Us, Mirah - Understanding, Mitski - Be The Cowboy, Miyah Folick - Premenitions, Moon Taxi - Let The Record Play, Morgan Saint - ALIEN, Mr Eazi - Life Is Eazi, Vol. 2 - Lagos to London, Mulatto - Mulatto, Mumford & Sons - Delta, Murs - A Strange Journey Into The Unimaginable, Muse - Simulation Theory, Myá - T.K.O. (The Knock Out), The Naked and Famous - A Still Heart, Nas - NASIR, Natalie Prass - The Future and the Past, Nathaniel Rateliff & The Night Sweats - Tearing at the Seams, Nef The Pharaoh - The Big Chang Theory, The Neighbourhood - The Neighbourhood, Ne-Yo - GOOD MAN, N.E.R.D. - NO_ONE EVER REALLY DIES, Nick Grant - Dreamin’ Out Loud [Mixtape], Nicki Minaj - Queen, NIKI - Zephyr, Nile Rodgers & CHIC - It’s About Time, Nipsey Hussle - Victory Lap, NJOMZA - Vacation, nobigdyl. - SOLAR, Noname - Room 25, N.O.R.E. - 5E, Now, Now - Saved, NR - Before It’s Too Late, ODIE - Analogue, Onra - Nobody Has To Know, Ookay - WOW! COOL ALBUM!, Pac Div - 1st Baptist, Pale Waves - My Mind Makes Noises, Passenger - Runaway, Parliament - Medicaid Fraud Dogg, Parquet Courts - Wide Awake!, Paul McCartney - Egypt Station, Paul Simon - In the Blue Light, Penelope Trappes - Penelope Two, A Perfect Circle - Eat the Elephant, Peter Bjorn and John - Darker Days, Phonte - No News Is Good News, Phony Ppl - mō’zā-ik, Phora - Love Is Hell, P-LO - PRIME, pluko - sixteen, Poo Bear - Poo Bear Presents: Birthday Music, Popcaan - Forever, Poppy - Am I A Girl?, Porches - The House, Post Malone - beerbongs & bentleys, Preme - Light of Day, Prince - Piano & a Microphone 1983, Princess Nokia - A Girl Cried Red [Mixtape], Prolifgate - Somewhere Else, PRyhme - PRhyme 2, Quavo - Quavo Huncho, Ralph - A Good Girl, RAY BLK - Empress, Rhye - Blood, Reason - There You Have It, R3HAB - The Wave, Rezz - Certain Kind of Magic, Rich Brian - Amen, Rita Ora - Phoenix, RL Grime - NOVA, RL Grimes - NOVA (The Remixes, Vol. 1),  RL Grimes - NOVA (The Remixes, Vol. 2), Robyn - Honey, Rome Fortune - Beautiful Pimp 3, ROOSEVELT - Young Romance, Royce Da 5’9” - Book of Ryan, R+R=NOW - Collagically Speaking, Russ - ZOO, Ryan Beatty - Boy In Jeans, Saba - CARE FOR ME, Sabrina Calaudio - No Rain, No Flowers, St. Beauty - Running To The Sun, SAINt JHN - Collection One, San Holo - album1, Sango - In The Comfort Of, Sean Paul - Mad Love: The Prequel, Shamir - Revelation, Sheppard - Watch The Sky, Shopping - The Official Body, Sidney Gish - No Dogs Allowed, Sigala - Brighter Days, Simian Mobile Disco - Murmurations, SiR - November, SKYGGE - Hello World, Skyzoo - In Celebration of Us, Slushii - DREAM, Smashing Pumpkins - SHINY AND OH SO BRIGHT, VOL. 1 / NO PAST. NO FUTURE., Smino - NOIR, Snail Mail - Lush, S’natra - Subject To Change, Snoop Dogg - Snoop Dogg Presents Bible of Love, Snow Patrol - Wildness, Soccer Mommy - Clean, Sofi Tukker - Treehouse, Son Lux - Brighter Wounds, SOPHIE - OIL OF EVERY PEARL’S UN-INSIDES, Starchild & The New Romantic - Language, Stefflon Don - SECURE [Mixtape], Steve Angello - Human, Steve Aoki - Neon Future III, Steve Hauschildt - Dissolvi, Stonie Blue - Blood Y Moi [Mix], Stro - Nice 2 Meet You, Again, Styles P - Dime Bag, Styles P - G-Host, Summer Walker - Last Day of Summer, Summerella - First Day of Summer, Surpentwithfeet - soil, Swearin’ - Fall Into The Sun, Swizz Beatz - POISON, Tamia - Passion Like Fire, Tammy Rivera - Fate, Teyana Taylor - K.T.S.E., Thatshymn - Pacific Standard Time, Thunderpussy - Thunderpussy, T.I. - DIME TRAP, Tinashe - Joyride, The Ting Tings - The Black Light, Tirzah - Devotion, Tokyo Jetz - Bonafide, Tokyo Police Club - TCP, Tom Misch - Geography, Tommy Genesis - Tommy Genesis, Toni Braxton - Sex & Cigarettes, Toni Romiti - Tomboy, Tory Lanez - LoVE me NOw, Tory Lanez - MEMORIES DON’T DIE, Towkio - WWW., Tracey Thorn - Record, Traci Braxton - On Earth, Travis Scott - ASTROWORLD, Trevor Jackson - Rough Drafts, Pt. 1, Trevor Powers - Mulberry Violence, Trey Songz - 11 [Mixtape], Trey Songz - 28 [Mixtape], TroyBoi - V!BEZ, Vol. 2, Troye Sivan - Bloom, Tunde Olaniran - Stranger, tune-yards - i can feel you creep into my private life, Two Feet - A 20 Something Fuck, Tyga - Kyoto, Unknown Mortal Orchestra - Sex & Food, Until The Ribbon Breaks - Until The Ribbon Breaks, Usher & Zaytoven - “A”, UZ - The Rebirth, The Vamps - Day & Night (Day Edition), Vance Joy - Nation Of Two, Various Artists - Fifty Shades Freed [Motion Picture Soundtrack], Various Artists - Ninjawerks, Vol. 1, Various Artists - Spider-Man: Into The Spider-Verse (Soundtrack From & Inspired by the Motion Picture), Various Artist - Uncle Drew [Original Motion Picture Soundtrack], Vicktor Taiwò - First Movement, Victoria Monet - Life After Love, Pt. 1, Victor Oladipo - V.O., Wild Nothing - Indigo, What So Not - Not All The Beautiful Things, Wet - Still Run, Wiz Khalifa - Rolling Papers 2, The Wombats - Beautiful People Will Ruin Your Life, WSTRN - DOU3LE 3AK, Xzibit, B-Real & Demrick - Serial Killers: Day of the Dead, Years & Years - Palo Santo, Yellow Claw - New Blood, YG - STAY DANGEROUS, Yhung T.O. - Trust Issues, Young Fathers - Cocoa Sugar, Young The Giant - Mirror Master, Youngr - This Is Not An Album, ZAYN - Icarus Fall, Ziggy Marley - Rebellion Rises, Zion I - Ritual Mystik, Zion I & DJ Fresh - The Tonight Show [Mixtape], ZHU - Ringo’s Desert, Z-Ro - Sadism, 5 Seconds of Summer - Youngblood, 88GLAM - 88GLAM2, 88rising - Head in the Clouds 

Meh:

Ace Hood - Trust The Process II: Undefeated, Amen Dunes - Freedom, Animal Collective - Tangerine Reef, AWALNATION - Here Comes The Runts, BANDGANG - In Too Deep, Benny - Different, Caitlyn Smith - Starfire, Carnage - Battered Bruised & Bloody, The Chainsmokers - Sick Boy, cupcakKe - Eden, cupcakKe - Ephorize, Curren$y - Parking Lot Music, Curren$y & Harry Fraud - The Marina, Daughters - You Won’t Get What You Want, Dave East - Karma 2, Dave Matthews Band - Come Tomorrow, DJ Critical Hype - More 9th (Drake & 9th Wonder Mash Up), DOM KENNEDY - Volume Two, Don Toliver - Donny Womback, Eminem - Kamaze, Fetty Wap - For My Fans, Fetty Wap - Bruce Wayne, Frankie Cosmos - Vessels, Future - BEASTMODE 2, G Herbo & Southside - Swervo, Ganja White Night - The Origins, Helena Hauff - Qualm, Hop Along - Bark Your Head Off, Dog, HUNCHO JACK (Travis Scott & Quavo) - HUNCHO JACK, Jack Huncho, Jean Grae & Quelle Chris - Everything’s Fine, Jeezy - Pressure, Keith Ape - BORN AGAIN, Kevin George - Hopeless Romantic, Larry June - Very Peaceful, Lil Durk - Just Cause Y’all Waited, Lil Pete - 4EverFocused, Lucis - Nude, MadeinTYO - Sincerely, Tokyo, Metro Boomin - NOT ALL HEROES WEAR CAPES, Matt and Kim - Almost Everyday, MGMT - Little Dark Age (Matthew Dear Album Remixes), MIKE - Black Soup [Mixtape], Mr Twin Sister - Salt, Nightmares On Wax - Shape the Future, OSHUN - Bittersweet, Vol. 1, Owl City - Cinematic, Palm - Rock Island, Prof - Pookie Baby, Raury - The Woods, Rae Sremmurd - SR3MM, Red Cafe - Less Talk More Hustle, Reese LAFLARE - Reese LAFLARE, Rich The Kid - The World Is Yours, Rico Nasty - Nasty, SHIRT - Pure Beauty, Shy Boys - Bell House, Slim Thug - The World Is Yours, Slum Village - The Lost Scrolls, Vol. 2 [Mixtape], Social Club Misfits - Into The Night, Steve Perry - Traces, Takeoff - The Last Rocket, Too $hort - The Sex Tape Playlist, Trae Tha Truth - Hometown Hero, Various Artists - Future Presents: SUPERFLY (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack), Various Artists - 9th Wonder Presents: Jamla is the Squad II, We The King’s - Six, Westside Gunn - Supreme Blientele, Wifisfuneral - Ethernet, Yves Tumor - Safe In the Hands of Love, Zaytoven - Trapholizay, 03 Greedo - God Level, 24hrs - HOUSES ON THE HILL

Bad:

Eminem - Revival, Jack White - Boarding House Reach, Kay! & Kenny Beats - 777, Lil Baby - Harder Then Ever, Quintin Miller - Q.M., Sheck Wes - MUDBOY, Starlito - At WAR With Myself Too, Trouble & Mike WiLL Made-It - Edgewood [Mixtape]

[28daysearlier]

I have been following Tockr since they first came on the scene in late 2017, I have always loved their unique designs since I first covered them (you can read that here), so you can imagine my delight when I got the opportunity recently to get my hands on one and spend some quality time with it.

The Concept

On June 6th 1944, a C-47 aircraft leads the charge into Normandy, emblazoned with foretoken message to Hitler. “That’s All, Brother” became an important part of American history on D-Day, and now you can own a piece of it.

The Tockr D-Day C-47 watch uses rescued material from the storied paratrooper transport as the foundation for its dial. Each dial bears the genuine markings of its past, and is completely unique in appearance.

The watch comes in 3 different variation styles, Type A ‘Clean Cut’, Type B ‘Stamped’, and Type C ‘Hard Worn’

The model I have for review is the Type C ‘Hard Worn’.

The Presentation Box

The watch comes in a wooden presentation box that is themed around WWII aviation and it really is a work of art on its own, everything about it is well thought out, and it is beautifully constructed, it alludes to the era it is meant too at every turn. As soon as you see the box you are aware that you are in for a special experience.

The faux fur brings to mind the flight jackets of WWII, the colour scheme is excellent, inside is the watch documentation and warranty card, and proudly presented below is the D-Day C47 itself.

I have done design work for years, I always have something to think (not say) when I see others designs. My only comment here is that who ever designed this kit did an exceptional job.

The Watch

CASE: Cushion-shaped in Stainles Steel 316L with anti-glare sapphire crystal

FINISH: Brushed/Polished

CASE BACK: Plain with Customized Engraving.

DIAL: Cut from an original portion of aeronautical aluminum that was rescued from That’s All, Brother during its extensive restoration,

Luminescent printed numerals.

DIAMETER: 42mm

The finish on the cushion case is beautiful, the brushed and polished edges work really together. The Anti-Reflective sapphire crystal is a really good quality and works really well to to allow you to admire what lies beneath.

The cushion case is cut in such a way that it is comfortable on smaller wrists like mine, whilst the crown is not obtrusive on the wrist in the slightest. It is my first part polished crown, and I really like it, it may be slightly slippy to wind, but hey – it is an automatic you don’t want take off, it is definately not a problem.

At first I was 50/50 about the plane on the end of the second hand, but after spending a week with the Tockr D-Day C47 I not only love the plane, but I love watching the shadow cast by the plane at it traverses the landscape of the textured dial below.

The back of the watch is really well finished and engraved, comfortable on the wrist, and securely in place by four screws. It is nice to see screws on a case in this day and age.

  The Movement and Running

I always say the mark of decent watch is what lies at the heart, not just the movement but the construction surrounding it. Again the D-Day does not disappoint. It is a full solid case with a Swiss ETA 2834-2 beating away healthily.

I love ETA movements and am going to miss them as they disappear from non swatch group watches in the months to come. Already we see brands jumping onto Sellita and manufacturer movements. It is hard to know the longevity from these other movements yet as only time will tell, but I do know that ETA are giving away their legacy, the movements being serviced in 40 years from now will not be ETA in the same degree that they are today.

When you are staring at a beating ETA 2834-2 you just have to test it (well you do if you are me).

Zero beat error, Zero deviation per day, healthy amplitude straight off the wrist. In other words that is pretty damned perfect, true poetry in motion.

Overall thoughts

It turns out my other watches hate the Tockr D-Day C47, they have not had any wrist time since it arrived, not because I really wanted to give this watch my full attention, but because I love wearing it.

I do not see how you could not love this watch for the following reasons:

No two are the same – the watch is unique.

Inside the watch is real piece of history

Superb design and construction

Swiss movement

Comfortable to wear

Awesome lume set up

Great customer service

Professional people behind the brand

I believe that Tockr is a brand that are here to stay, they have a great team and real passion for what they do. They also have a keen eye for design with a boldness to their designs that is really refreshing.

Do I have anything else to add?

Nah – Thats All Brother!

It has to be mentioned that proceeds from each purchase will go towards the CAF, helping fund the restoration of historic aircraft for future generations.

Links

Tockr Website

Facebook

Instagram

Hands on – The Tockr D-Day C-47 I have been following Tockr since they first came on the scene in late 2017, I have always loved their unique designs since I first covered them (

[wineanddinosaur]

For Millions of Americans, TikTok Is Offering a Wild, Uncut Introduction to ’80s-Style Flair Bartending

Wearing a flowered top, her long blonde hair cascading over her shoulders, Shay Court juggles a pink shaker tin while tossing a bottle of Tito’s behind her back, all in motions so fast it’s hard to keep up. In the 15-second video, Bruno Mars’ “Uptown Funk” plays and, when the diminutive crooner yells “Stop!,” Court immediately halts her bottle-tossing perfectly on the beat (“Wait a minute…”), the Tito’s held upside down near her head, enabling her to long-pour the vodka into a pint glass below.

“Drinks during quarantine be like…🤪,” writes Court, better known as the @flairbartendress to her 27,000 followers on TikTok.

While Instagram is rife with very serious amateur bartenders doing very serious things, TikTok is where all the fun is going on these days — mostly in the form of flair bartending, a much-maligned art form you probably haven’t thought about in a while. In fact, the majority of the most followed #cocktail and #bartending accounts on TikTok are for flair bartenders. The #flairbartending hashtag itself has a stunning 36 million views.

@flairbartendressDrinks during quarantine be like.. 🤪 ##flairbartending ##fyp ##foryou ##new ##bartender ##flair ##drinks♬ Stop! Wait a Minute – Bruno Mars, Tik Tok

It all kind of makes sense — flipping bottles behind your back and juggling shakers in the air is a perfect fit for TikTok’s short-form video platform typically employed by teenagers for improvised dances and lip-sync videos. (Isn’t flair bartending just dancing with bottles?) With most all flair bartenders out of work these days, they’ve gravitated to this hippest and youngest of social media platforms.

Court says she got introduced to TikTok by her 8-year-old daughter. A Canadian, she learned her craft working in Las Vegas bars like Bally’s and Kahunaville. Today, Court is a private events bartender in northern Kentucky, but with few private events at the moment, she began fooling around on TikTok. There were already some flair bartenders on TikTok doing their thing, but Court thought she could really lean into the platform’s full capabilities.

“I wanted to do — not just flair — but thought maybe I could take those TikTok trends and put my own spin on them,” she explains. In TikTok parlance, Court is referring to the site’s most viral sounds of the moment, usually snippets from songs but sometimes mere audio clips, often bolstered by a hashtag like, say, #savage. That’s why if you venture into the wild world of TikTok, you’ll notice many kids doing similar dance moves all to the exact same clip from the exact same song. Like Court, who took viral audio from the bbno$ rap “Nursery,” which many TikTokers had been syncing to funny videos of themselves going from stumbling to strutting, and instead matched it to her flair. That TikTik alone has racked up 1.2 million views so far. “That’s not something a lot of people have seen with flair bartending,” she says.

If flair bartending emerged across America in the 1980s, reaching its pinnacle in the 1988 Tom Cruise movie “Cocktail,” nowadays, it mainly exists in competition form, often in Eastern Europe, with very few American localities having much of a flair community. And, during a pandemic, if “normal” bars are able to offer takeaway cocktails and sidewalk and patio service, you’re not exactly going to see someone flipping bottles on Fifth Avenue. That’s why most of these furloughed flair masters are left performing tricks from their kitchens, backyards, and living rooms.

“The videos must be more impressive because the [bar] scene is not there,” says John Faller (@cocktailsgarnishes) who is stuck doing flair tricks on a rug in front of his TV or in the foyer by an umbrella rack for his 60,000 followers. “It brings more challenges and pushes the limits of imagination away,” he adds.

@cocktailsgarnishes##chaussettes ##costume ##flip ##jonglage ##somelier ##viral ##style ##barman ##bartender ##cocktails ##wine ##foryou ##pourtoi♬ PYRO – Chester Young & Castion

The Frenchman works at an upscale hotel bar in non-pandemic times and he’s been incorporating flair into his professional bartending for nearly a decade. He started using Instagram in early 2019, mostly to post his beautiful and baroque garnishes. They were getting some attention, but not a ton. After noticing that TikTok was booming, he pivoted to posting flair videos there in late February of this year. He now has 10 times the followers on TikTok compared to Instagram, despite posting nearly the exact same videos. Other flair bartenders have noticed the same thing.

There’s three-time world flair champion Luca Valentin, who doesn’t just juggle bottles but three separate accounts on TikTok, most notably for flair purposes @valentinluca and @cocktailswithluca. The Romanian man started posting to the latter in mid-May, building an Ecuador cocktail by flipping a wine glass and his bottles of rum in the air, tossing some lemon juice behind his back, flipping ice from a shovel into the glass, and flicking the cap off a tonic bottle. In the two months since, he’s made over 40 more videos, quickly amassing 85,000 followers and over half a million likes. (He has less than half the amount of followers on his Instagram page, which he has been using for over seven years.)

The thing is, many of these young TikToker users — some 69 percent, are between ages 13 and 24; almost none are older than 40 — have surely never seen a flair bartender in person so they have no preconceived notions. Hell, many high school- and college-aged TikTokers have perhaps never legally even been inside a bar. So flair bartending in any form is an exotic new world to them. Which makes me wonder if TikTok could be completely reviving this often-ignored niche of mixology.

“I think with the younger kids, they get excited when they see it — it’s a show for them,” says Zach Prohaska, who posts as @cdbartending. He finds the same is true in the real world, quite frankly; he works plenty of bar mitzvahs where the tweens are wowed when he teaches them tricks with a soda can.

@cdbartendingA Blue Lagoon 🌊⛱🍹 ##bartender ##blue ##fyp ##cocktail ##learnfromme ##learnfromhome ##SummerProject ##foryou♬ Jus’ Know – BlackMayo

“Yes, I do have followers that are underage,” admits Kevin Gibbons. As his @elitebartendingfl is a “pro” TikTok account, he can monitor his viewership analytics more closely. “They say, ‘You’ve made me want to be a bartender when I’m older’ — and that’s kind of what I want!”

Gibbons, an Englishman, currently lives in Orlando and owns and runs several Elite Bartending schools, all of which are associated with actual bars like The Attic. When those bars were forced to close due to the pandemic, and he could no longer teach his students in person, he took four pieces of wood, spent 20 minutes building a makeshift bar in front of his home, and began demonstrating flair tricks and cocktail making on TikTok. Next thing he knew he had over 300,000 followers and 4 million likes (compared to just 15,000 followers on his Instagram).

“I wasn’t really prepared for that—I certainly didn’t start out to become an influencer,” he jokes. He’s now getting sent products, merchandise, and sponsorship opportunities.

Unlike Court, Faller, and Valentin, Gibbons’ TikTok flair is less based on the music-backed, “how-did-he-do- that?!” razzle dazzle and is instead more of a tutorial. I particularly enjoyed one TikTok where he teaches you to juggle bottles by envisioning an upside-down triangle above your head. Gibbons claims this method has taught people flair juggling in as quick as two minutes.

“With TikTok, it’s so visually pleasing to the eye — you’re getting cocktails and a show,” says Gibbons. But he doesn’t think it’s pure frivolity and, in fact, preaches to his students (and viewers) that it can help them increase their nightly tips. “I’ve always felt like it gives the image of a bartender being next-level.”

Prohaska, for one, agrees. He also runs a bartending school and events companies in Toronto. He joined TikTok late last year after seeing a Gary Vaynerchuk video explaining how it’s now the fastest growing social media platform. Though Prohaska claims he was immediately overwhelmed by the rapid-fire, fresh-faced platform — “I’ll be honest, I felt like I was 100 years old” — he nevertheless started posting some videos and immediately began getting exposure, especially for his garnish and knife tricks (and, yes, blue cocktails).

“Let’s be honest: Flair is a pretty cool thing. And it’s new to this younger crowd,” says Prohaska, who has been bartending for 20 years and incorporating flair for 16. Like Gibbons, he, too, believes in more practical flair; not wasting 20 minutes tossing bottles around, but instead using each movement to work toward getting a drink ultimately made.

“I get it. I used to hate flair, too,” he’s quick to add. “Now I hate how everyone will talk smack about flair, but I understand — I was that bartender. Once you learn it effectively, though, the people you’re serving love to see it.”

As Prohaska alludes to, the cocktail cognoscenti have always maligned flair, thinking it cheesy and an impediment to serious drinks-making. If it appears in pop culture nowadays, it’s mostly to show the hubris of a non-bartender put under the limelight, like, say, “King of Queens”’ oafish Kevin James dropping bottles upon trying a trick beyond his skill level. So, if flair bartending has mostly been a punchline for the last two decades, these TikTokers seem to be bringing back it’s, uh, respectability.

“I’ve never been this viral,” says Court, who amazingly has garnered her following with a mere 20 TikToks posted so far. “And it’s a lot of people that I’ve never met who suddenly have an interest in flair. Ninety-nine percent of the comments are positive. ‘Oh, that’s really cool, I’d like to try that.’”

I’ve wondered if there are people on TikTok now trying out flair tricks who have nothing to do with the bartending industry. The answer would seem to be yes. In fact, The Rock recently reposted one of Prohaska’s videos to his 190 million followers; Prohaska quickly added 45,000 new followers that night alone. But it’s not just celebrities, of course, who are into TikTok flair. It’s mostly regular users.

“I get ‘dueted’ everyday,” says Gibbons referring to TikTok’s method of allowing users to create side-by-side videos with people they follow, trying to synchronize their moves to the person they dueted. These duets are mostly being created by flair neophytes, young TikTokers seeing this crazy form of bartending as simply another meme, another viral dance move to put their own spin on. It’s really not a surprise to me — these TikTok users are the same generation that made water bottle flipping a thing in the summer of 2016.

Court thinks this newfound attention to flair might not just be because of the pandemic, but thanks to it, as flair bartenders are no longer working in their bars. She thinks there’s a certain charm to her doing tricks in regular clothes, in her living room or backyard; the casual setting is more likely to inspire her followers to try it out themselves.

“It allows the everyday person to relate because I’m not in a totally professional setting,” she says. “‘Wow, look what you can do!’”

But, just like most people don’t watch TikTok dance videos because they want to learn to The Renegade, most people don’t seem to watch these flair bartending videos because they want to start juggling bottles of Tito’s and working on four-foot-long pours. As Prohaska says: “A lot of my followers just miss the social part of the bar scene. They leave me comments: ‘I miss going to bars. But if the bars were open, I’d be at yours!’”

The article For Millions of Americans, TikTok Is Offering a Wild, Uncut Introduction to ’80s-Style Flair Bartending appeared first on VinePair.

source https://vinepair.com/articles/tiktok-flair-bartending/

[johnboothus]

For Millions of Americans TikTok Is Offering a Wild Uncut Introduction to 80s-Style Flair Bartending

Wearing a flowered top, her long blonde hair cascading over her shoulders, Shay Court juggles a pink shaker tin while tossing a bottle of Tito’s behind her back, all in motions so fast it’s hard to keep up. In the 15-second video, Bruno Mars’ “Uptown Funk” plays and, when the diminutive crooner yells “Stop!,” Court immediately halts her bottle-tossing perfectly on the beat (“Wait a minute…”), the Tito’s held upside down near her head, enabling her to long-pour the vodka into a pint glass below.

“Drinks during quarantine be like…?,” writes Court, better known as the @flairbartendress to her 27,000 followers on TikTok.

While Instagram is rife with very serious amateur bartenders doing very serious things, TikTok is where all the fun is going on these days — mostly in the form of flair bartending, a much-maligned art form you probably haven’t thought about in a while. In fact, the majority of the most followed #cocktail and #bartending accounts on TikTok are for flair bartenders. The #flairbartending hashtag itself has a stunning 36 million views.

@flairbartendressDrinks during quarantine be like.. ? ##flairbartending ##fyp ##foryou ##new ##bartender ##flair ##drinks♬ Stop! Wait a Minute – Bruno Mars, Tik Tok

It all kind of makes sense — flipping bottles behind your back and juggling shakers in the air is a perfect fit for TikTok’s short-form video platform typically employed by teenagers for improvised dances and lip-sync videos. (Isn’t flair bartending just dancing with bottles?) With most all flair bartenders out of work these days, they’ve gravitated to this hippest and youngest of social media platforms.

Court says she got introduced to TikTok by her 8-year-old daughter. A Canadian, she learned her craft working in Las Vegas bars like Bally’s and Kahunaville. Today, Court is a private events bartender in northern Kentucky, but with few private events at the moment, she began fooling around on TikTok. There were already some flair bartenders on TikTok doing their thing, but Court thought she could really lean into the platform’s full capabilities.

“I wanted to do — not just flair — but thought maybe I could take those TikTok trends and put my own spin on them,” she explains. In TikTok parlance, Court is referring to the site’s most viral sounds of the moment, usually snippets from songs but sometimes mere audio clips, often bolstered by a hashtag like, say, #savage. That’s why if you venture into the wild world of TikTok, you’ll notice many kids doing similar dance moves all to the exact same clip from the exact same song. Like Court, who took viral audio from the bbno$ rap “Nursery,” which many TikTokers had been syncing to funny videos of themselves going from stumbling to strutting, and instead matched it to her flair. That TikTik alone has racked up 1.2 million views so far. “That’s not something a lot of people have seen with flair bartending,” she says.

If flair bartending emerged across America in the 1980s, reaching its pinnacle in the 1988 Tom Cruise movie “Cocktail,” nowadays, it mainly exists in competition form, often in Eastern Europe, with very few American localities having much of a flair community. And, during a pandemic, if “normal” bars are able to offer takeaway cocktails and sidewalk and patio service, you’re not exactly going to see someone flipping bottles on Fifth Avenue. That’s why most of these furloughed flair masters are left performing tricks from their kitchens, backyards, and living rooms.

“The videos must be more impressive because the [bar] scene is not there,” says John Faller (@cocktailsgarnishes) who is stuck doing flair tricks on a rug in front of his TV or in the foyer by an umbrella rack for his 60,000 followers. “It brings more challenges and pushes the limits of imagination away,” he adds.

@cocktailsgarnishes##chaussettes ##costume ##flip ##jonglage ##somelier ##viral ##style ##barman ##bartender ##cocktails ##wine ##foryou ##pourtoi♬ PYRO – Chester Young & Castion

The Frenchman works at an upscale hotel bar in non-pandemic times and he’s been incorporating flair into his professional bartending for nearly a decade. He started using Instagram in early 2019, mostly to post his beautiful and baroque garnishes. They were getting some attention, but not a ton. After noticing that TikTok was booming, he pivoted to posting flair videos there in late February of this year. He now has 10 times the followers on TikTok compared to Instagram, despite posting nearly the exact same videos. Other flair bartenders have noticed the same thing.

There’s three-time world flair champion Luca Valentin, who doesn’t just juggle bottles but three separate accounts on TikTok, most notably for flair purposes @valentinluca and @cocktailswithluca. The Romanian man started posting to the latter in mid-May, building an Ecuador cocktail by flipping a wine glass and his bottles of rum in the air, tossing some lemon juice behind his back, flipping ice from a shovel into the glass, and flicking the cap off a tonic bottle. In the two months since, he’s made over 40 more videos, quickly amassing 85,000 followers and over half a million likes. (He has less than half the amount of followers on his Instagram page, which he has been using for over seven years.)

The thing is, many of these young TikToker users — some 69 percent, are between ages 13 and 24; almost none are older than 40 — have surely never seen a flair bartender in person so they have no preconceived notions. Hell, many high school- and college-aged TikTokers have perhaps never legally even been inside a bar. So flair bartending in any form is an exotic new world to them. Which makes me wonder if TikTok could be completely reviving this often-ignored niche of mixology.

“I think with the younger kids, they get excited when they see it — it’s a show for them,” says Zach Prohaska, who posts as @cdbartending. He finds the same is true in the real world, quite frankly; he works plenty of bar mitzvahs where the tweens are wowed when he teaches them tricks with a soda can.

@cdbartendingA Blue Lagoon ?⛱? ##bartender ##blue ##fyp ##cocktail ##learnfromme ##learnfromhome ##SummerProject ##foryou♬ Jus’ Know – BlackMayo

“Yes, I do have followers that are underage,” admits Kevin Gibbons. As his @elitebartendingfl is a “pro” TikTok account, he can monitor his viewership analytics more closely. “They say, ‘You’ve made me want to be a bartender when I’m older’ — and that’s kind of what I want!”

Gibbons, an Englishman, currently lives in Orlando and owns and runs several Elite Bartending schools, all of which are associated with actual bars like The Attic. When those bars were forced to close due to the pandemic, and he could no longer teach his students in person, he took four pieces of wood, spent 20 minutes building a makeshift bar in front of his home, and began demonstrating flair tricks and cocktail making on TikTok. Next thing he knew he had over 300,000 followers and 4 million likes (compared to just 15,000 followers on his Instagram).

“I wasn’t really prepared for that—I certainly didn’t start out to become an influencer,” he jokes. He’s now getting sent products, merchandise, and sponsorship opportunities.

Unlike Court, Faller, and Valentin, Gibbons’ TikTok flair is less based on the music-backed, “how-did-he-do- that?!” razzle dazzle and is instead more of a tutorial. I particularly enjoyed one TikTok where he teaches you to juggle bottles by envisioning an upside-down triangle above your head. Gibbons claims this method has taught people flair juggling in as quick as two minutes.

“With TikTok, it’s so visually pleasing to the eye — you’re getting cocktails and a show,” says Gibbons. But he doesn’t think it’s pure frivolity and, in fact, preaches to his students (and viewers) that it can help them increase their nightly tips. “I’ve always felt like it gives the image of a bartender being next-level.”

Prohaska, for one, agrees. He also runs a bartending school and events companies in Toronto. He joined TikTok late last year after seeing a Gary Vaynerchuk video explaining how it’s now the fastest growing social media platform. Though Prohaska claims he was immediately overwhelmed by the rapid-fire, fresh-faced platform — “I’ll be honest, I felt like I was 100 years old” — he nevertheless started posting some videos and immediately began getting exposure, especially for his garnish and knife tricks (and, yes, blue cocktails).

“Let’s be honest: Flair is a pretty cool thing. And it’s new to this younger crowd,” says Prohaska, who has been bartending for 20 years and incorporating flair for 16. Like Gibbons, he, too, believes in more practical flair; not wasting 20 minutes tossing bottles around, but instead using each movement to work toward getting a drink ultimately made.

“I get it. I used to hate flair, too,” he’s quick to add. “Now I hate how everyone will talk smack about flair, but I understand — I was that bartender. Once you learn it effectively, though, the people you’re serving love to see it.”

As Prohaska alludes to, the cocktail cognoscenti have always maligned flair, thinking it cheesy and an impediment to serious drinks-making. If it appears in pop culture nowadays, it’s mostly to show the hubris of a non-bartender put under the limelight, like, say, “King of Queens”’ oafish Kevin James dropping bottles upon trying a trick beyond his skill level. So, if flair bartending has mostly been a punchline for the last two decades, these TikTokers seem to be bringing back it’s, uh, respectability.

“I’ve never been this viral,” says Court, who amazingly has garnered her following with a mere 20 TikToks posted so far. “And it’s a lot of people that I’ve never met who suddenly have an interest in flair. Ninety-nine percent of the comments are positive. ‘Oh, that’s really cool, I’d like to try that.’”

I’ve wondered if there are people on TikTok now trying out flair tricks who have nothing to do with the bartending industry. The answer would seem to be yes. In fact, The Rock recently reposted one of Prohaska’s videos to his 190 million followers; Prohaska quickly added 45,000 new followers that night alone. But it’s not just celebrities, of course, who are into TikTok flair. It’s mostly regular users.

“I get ‘dueted’ everyday,” says Gibbons referring to TikTok’s method of allowing users to create side-by-side videos with people they follow, trying to synchronize their moves to the person they dueted. These duets are mostly being created by flair neophytes, young TikTokers seeing this crazy form of bartending as simply another meme, another viral dance move to put their own spin on. It’s really not a surprise to me — these TikTok users are the same generation that made water bottle flipping a thing in the summer of 2016.

Court thinks this newfound attention to flair might not just be because of the pandemic, but thanks to it, as flair bartenders are no longer working in their bars. She thinks there’s a certain charm to her doing tricks in regular clothes, in her living room or backyard; the casual setting is more likely to inspire her followers to try it out themselves.

“It allows the everyday person to relate because I’m not in a totally professional setting,” she says. “‘Wow, look what you can do!’”

But, just like most people don’t watch TikTok dance videos because they want to learn to The Renegade, most people don’t seem to watch these flair bartending videos because they want to start juggling bottles of Tito’s and working on four-foot-long pours. As Prohaska says: “A lot of my followers just miss the social part of the bar scene. They leave me comments: ‘I miss going to bars. But if the bars were open, I’d be at yours!’”

The article For Millions of Americans, TikTok Is Offering a Wild, Uncut Introduction to ’80s-Style Flair Bartending appeared first on VinePair.

Via https://vinepair.com/articles/tiktok-flair-bartending/

source https://vinology1.weebly.com/blog/for-millions-of-americans-tiktok-is-offering-a-wild-uncut-introduction-to-80s-style-flair-bartending

[isaiahrippinus]

For Millions of Americans, TikTok Is Offering a Wild, Uncut Introduction to ’80s-Style Flair Bartending

Wearing a flowered top, her long blonde hair cascading over her shoulders, Shay Court juggles a pink shaker tin while tossing a bottle of Tito’s behind her back, all in motions so fast it’s hard to keep up. In the 15-second video, Bruno Mars’ “Uptown Funk” plays and, when the diminutive crooner yells “Stop!,” Court immediately halts her bottle-tossing perfectly on the beat (“Wait a minute…”), the Tito’s held upside down near her head, enabling her to long-pour the vodka into a pint glass below.

“Drinks during quarantine be like…🤪,” writes Court, better known as the @flairbartendress to her 27,000 followers on TikTok.

While Instagram is rife with very serious amateur bartenders doing very serious things, TikTok is where all the fun is going on these days — mostly in the form of flair bartending, a much-maligned art form you probably haven’t thought about in a while. In fact, the majority of the most followed #cocktail and #bartending accounts on TikTok are for flair bartenders. The #flairbartending hashtag itself has a stunning 36 million views.

@flairbartendressDrinks during quarantine be like.. 🤪 ##flairbartending ##fyp ##foryou ##new ##bartender ##flair ##drinks♬ Stop! Wait a Minute – Bruno Mars, Tik Tok

It all kind of makes sense — flipping bottles behind your back and juggling shakers in the air is a perfect fit for TikTok’s short-form video platform typically employed by teenagers for improvised dances and lip-sync videos. (Isn’t flair bartending just dancing with bottles?) With most all flair bartenders out of work these days, they’ve gravitated to this hippest and youngest of social media platforms.

Court says she got introduced to TikTok by her 8-year-old daughter. A Canadian, she learned her craft working in Las Vegas bars like Bally’s and Kahunaville. Today, Court is a private events bartender in northern Kentucky, but with few private events at the moment, she began fooling around on TikTok. There were already some flair bartenders on TikTok doing their thing, but Court thought she could really lean into the platform’s full capabilities.

“I wanted to do — not just flair — but thought maybe I could take those TikTok trends and put my own spin on them,” she explains. In TikTok parlance, Court is referring to the site’s most viral sounds of the moment, usually snippets from songs but sometimes mere audio clips, often bolstered by a hashtag like, say, #savage. That’s why if you venture into the wild world of TikTok, you’ll notice many kids doing similar dance moves all to the exact same clip from the exact same song. Like Court, who took viral audio from the bbno$ rap “Nursery,” which many TikTokers had been syncing to funny videos of themselves going from stumbling to strutting, and instead matched it to her flair. That TikTik alone has racked up 1.2 million views so far. “That’s not something a lot of people have seen with flair bartending,” she says.

If flair bartending emerged across America in the 1980s, reaching its pinnacle in the 1988 Tom Cruise movie “Cocktail,” nowadays, it mainly exists in competition form, often in Eastern Europe, with very few American localities having much of a flair community. And, during a pandemic, if “normal” bars are able to offer takeaway cocktails and sidewalk and patio service, you’re not exactly going to see someone flipping bottles on Fifth Avenue. That’s why most of these furloughed flair masters are left performing tricks from their kitchens, backyards, and living rooms.

“The videos must be more impressive because the [bar] scene is not there,” says John Faller (@cocktailsgarnishes) who is stuck doing flair tricks on a rug in front of his TV or in the foyer by an umbrella rack for his 60,000 followers. “It brings more challenges and pushes the limits of imagination away,” he adds.

@cocktailsgarnishes##chaussettes ##costume ##flip ##jonglage ##somelier ##viral ##style ##barman ##bartender ##cocktails ##wine ##foryou ##pourtoi♬ PYRO – Chester Young & Castion

The Frenchman works at an upscale hotel bar in non-pandemic times and he’s been incorporating flair into his professional bartending for nearly a decade. He started using Instagram in early 2019, mostly to post his beautiful and baroque garnishes. They were getting some attention, but not a ton. After noticing that TikTok was booming, he pivoted to posting flair videos there in late February of this year. He now has 10 times the followers on TikTok compared to Instagram, despite posting nearly the exact same videos. Other flair bartenders have noticed the same thing.

There’s three-time world flair champion Luca Valentin, who doesn’t just juggle bottles but three separate accounts on TikTok, most notably for flair purposes @valentinluca and @cocktailswithluca. The Romanian man started posting to the latter in mid-May, building an Ecuador cocktail by flipping a wine glass and his bottles of rum in the air, tossing some lemon juice behind his back, flipping ice from a shovel into the glass, and flicking the cap off a tonic bottle. In the two months since, he’s made over 40 more videos, quickly amassing 85,000 followers and over half a million likes. (He has less than half the amount of followers on his Instagram page, which he has been using for over seven years.)

The thing is, many of these young TikToker users — some 69 percent, are between ages 13 and 24; almost none are older than 40 — have surely never seen a flair bartender in person so they have no preconceived notions. Hell, many high school- and college-aged TikTokers have perhaps never legally even been inside a bar. So flair bartending in any form is an exotic new world to them. Which makes me wonder if TikTok could be completely reviving this often-ignored niche of mixology.

“I think with the younger kids, they get excited when they see it — it’s a show for them,” says Zach Prohaska, who posts as @cdbartending. He finds the same is true in the real world, quite frankly; he works plenty of bar mitzvahs where the tweens are wowed when he teaches them tricks with a soda can.

@cdbartendingA Blue Lagoon 🌊⛱🍹 ##bartender ##blue ##fyp ##cocktail ##learnfromme ##learnfromhome ##SummerProject ##foryou♬ Jus’ Know – BlackMayo

“Yes, I do have followers that are underage,” admits Kevin Gibbons. As his @elitebartendingfl is a “pro” TikTok account, he can monitor his viewership analytics more closely. “They say, ‘You’ve made me want to be a bartender when I’m older’ — and that’s kind of what I want!”

Gibbons, an Englishman, currently lives in Orlando and owns and runs several Elite Bartending schools, all of which are associated with actual bars like The Attic. When those bars were forced to close due to the pandemic, and he could no longer teach his students in person, he took four pieces of wood, spent 20 minutes building a makeshift bar in front of his home, and began demonstrating flair tricks and cocktail making on TikTok. Next thing he knew he had over 300,000 followers and 4 million likes (compared to just 15,000 followers on his Instagram).

“I wasn’t really prepared for that—I certainly didn’t start out to become an influencer,” he jokes. He’s now getting sent products, merchandise, and sponsorship opportunities.

Unlike Court, Faller, and Valentin, Gibbons’ TikTok flair is less based on the music-backed, “how-did-he-do- that?!” razzle dazzle and is instead more of a tutorial. I particularly enjoyed one TikTok where he teaches you to juggle bottles by envisioning an upside-down triangle above your head. Gibbons claims this method has taught people flair juggling in as quick as two minutes.

“With TikTok, it’s so visually pleasing to the eye — you’re getting cocktails and a show,” says Gibbons. But he doesn’t think it’s pure frivolity and, in fact, preaches to his students (and viewers) that it can help them increase their nightly tips. “I’ve always felt like it gives the image of a bartender being next-level.”

Prohaska, for one, agrees. He also runs a bartending school and events companies in Toronto. He joined TikTok late last year after seeing a Gary Vaynerchuk video explaining how it’s now the fastest growing social media platform. Though Prohaska claims he was immediately overwhelmed by the rapid-fire, fresh-faced platform — “I’ll be honest, I felt like I was 100 years old” — he nevertheless started posting some videos and immediately began getting exposure, especially for his garnish and knife tricks (and, yes, blue cocktails).

“Let’s be honest: Flair is a pretty cool thing. And it’s new to this younger crowd,” says Prohaska, who has been bartending for 20 years and incorporating flair for 16. Like Gibbons, he, too, believes in more practical flair; not wasting 20 minutes tossing bottles around, but instead using each movement to work toward getting a drink ultimately made.

“I get it. I used to hate flair, too,” he’s quick to add. “Now I hate how everyone will talk smack about flair, but I understand — I was that bartender. Once you learn it effectively, though, the people you’re serving love to see it.”

As Prohaska alludes to, the cocktail cognoscenti have always maligned flair, thinking it cheesy and an impediment to serious drinks-making. If it appears in pop culture nowadays, it’s mostly to show the hubris of a non-bartender put under the limelight, like, say, “King of Queens”’ oafish Kevin James dropping bottles upon trying a trick beyond his skill level. So, if flair bartending has mostly been a punchline for the last two decades, these TikTokers seem to be bringing back it’s, uh, respectability.

“I’ve never been this viral,” says Court, who amazingly has garnered her following with a mere 20 TikToks posted so far. “And it’s a lot of people that I’ve never met who suddenly have an interest in flair. Ninety-nine percent of the comments are positive. ‘Oh, that’s really cool, I’d like to try that.’”

I’ve wondered if there are people on TikTok now trying out flair tricks who have nothing to do with the bartending industry. The answer would seem to be yes. In fact, The Rock recently reposted one of Prohaska’s videos to his 190 million followers; Prohaska quickly added 45,000 new followers that night alone. But it’s not just celebrities, of course, who are into TikTok flair. It’s mostly regular users.

“I get ‘dueted’ everyday,” says Gibbons referring to TikTok’s method of allowing users to create side-by-side videos with people they follow, trying to synchronize their moves to the person they dueted. These duets are mostly being created by flair neophytes, young TikTokers seeing this crazy form of bartending as simply another meme, another viral dance move to put their own spin on. It’s really not a surprise to me — these TikTok users are the same generation that made water bottle flipping a thing in the summer of 2016.

Court thinks this newfound attention to flair might not just be because of the pandemic, but thanks to it, as flair bartenders are no longer working in their bars. She thinks there’s a certain charm to her doing tricks in regular clothes, in her living room or backyard; the casual setting is more likely to inspire her followers to try it out themselves.

“It allows the everyday person to relate because I’m not in a totally professional setting,” she says. “‘Wow, look what you can do!’”

But, just like most people don’t watch TikTok dance videos because they want to learn to The Renegade, most people don’t seem to watch these flair bartending videos because they want to start juggling bottles of Tito’s and working on four-foot-long pours. As Prohaska says: “A lot of my followers just miss the social part of the bar scene. They leave me comments: ‘I miss going to bars. But if the bars were open, I’d be at yours!’”

The article For Millions of Americans, TikTok Is Offering a Wild, Uncut Introduction to ’80s-Style Flair Bartending appeared first on VinePair.

source https://vinepair.com/articles/tiktok-flair-bartending/ source https://vinology1.tumblr.com/post/626613969391632384

[illyriantremors]

Beneath the Stars Chapter 7

Chapter: I II III IV V VI

AO3 Linkage

Summary: In an effort to help her dad out with the mounting stack of bills, Feyre gets a job at a local art gallery. Her first day is going well enough when Feyre finds herself caught between texts with Rhys and Tamlin on her lunch break that force her to choose how she'll spend the rest of her afternoon. Things only get more complicated when she finally arrives home to a less than pleasant surprise.

Chapter 7

“So that’s the post-modern gallery,” a crisp, professional voice stated as we stepped down the suspended staircase back to the first floor. “The main showroom is here taking up pretty much the entirety of the bottom floor. We run five different exhibits at a time with one showcase per month - speaking of which, the next one’s in two weeks and you’ll be expected to be present for it. That okay?”

I nodded eagerly. “Absolutely.”

The city’s local art gallery was going to be a tiny bit of a commute two days a week after school and once on weekends, but it was worth it. I was hired on only as a receptionist, but it paid well for a starting gig considering I was still in high school and woefully inexperienced.

Mrs. Weaver had given me the glowing recommendation I’d needed to get the green light. She overheard me mentioning to Amren that I was trying to find some kind of work and pulled me aside after class to say one of her friends from college was running the gallery and needed someone on the phones and emails.

Two weeks later I was in.

I was under a two month probationary period, but it hardly mattered. The gallery was my personal definition of divinity - art at every corner from all different styles and artists with a huge lush terrace off the back that housed a chintzy outdoor cafe restaurant. And the best part was that the gallery also housed a real working in-house studio and once my probationary status was cleared, I was allowed to use it.

I was going to kick so much ass on my AP Studio Art final because of this - as soon as I figured out what in the world I was doing for my project.

Self-portraiture still alluded me. The inspiration just wasn’t there and the clock was starting to tick. Soon I’d be stuck with more than one piece to complete every month and knowing how clean and up to scratch my portfolio would have to be, the pressure felt insurmountable at times.

But the gallery was a breathe of fresh air, the same one I felt every afternoon I spent in class with Amren painting away on our easels. Mrs. Weaver still assigned us projects for her own class and that made the challenge of the exam even greater, but at least it got me painting again and that’s what counted.

Because while I hadn’t told anyone, I really hadn’t painted much over summer. It was too wonderful to taint with the drain I constantly felt pulling at me.

But now - I could feel the juices flowing again a little bit.

I spent most of my first morning learning the computer systems and the overall way the gallery functioned. Being a Saturday, we were fairly busy, but it made time go faster.

Which was good because my phone had buzzed in my pocket about once every five minutes since I clocked in for my shift. Not wanting to make a bad impression on my first day, I refrained from so much as looking at the lock screen until my break, which I filled by drinking one of the cafe smoothies in the garden out back.

When I glanced at my phone, I found about a dozen different text messages from Tamlin.

Fey, I know you’re working, but please call me when you have a minute.

It’s really important.

Please call me, Feyre.

You’re not picking up. I have a Newspaper meeting in twenty. Please call me before if you can, I need to talk to you!

Out of the meeting. Ianthe made final decisions on co-editors. Can we talk?

FEYRE???

And on and on it went. I felt drained just scrolling through it, nevermind replying.

There was a lone text in the middle of all the madness, though, that brought some of the color back to my cheeks.

Good luck today. Knowing you, you’ll knock ‘em dead.

Short. Simple. And the first piece of encouragement I’d received all day. Not even dad had said anything when I jetted out the door exclaiming about first day jitters. I sent a reply text straight away.

And yet somehow, you’re still alive and well.

I shot the text off and received Rhys’s reply not a heartbeat later.

What can I say? I’m hard to get rid of and I like a challenge.

So I’m a challenge, eh?

You’re a lot of things, Feyre, including challenging. And smart. And beautiful. But mostly challenging, particularly when you give me the death glare. I haven’t seen anything quite so terrifying since Cassian cried watching Titanic.

Oh ha-ha, as if you’re so tough. I’ll be sure to throw something at you next time to make my point clear.

As long as it’s not a shoe. Morrigan tells me they’re pointy and painful, or is that only when you wear them?

Care to find out? I’ve got a few pairs I could loan you. Personally I think you’d look ravishing in a set of red leather pumps.

I’d like to point out that you’ve just admitted to me without any prompting of my own that you have a pair of red leather high heels. And I think I’d much rather like to see them on you, Feyre darling.

I snickered aloud and glanced up from my phone to see if anyone could notice the red blooming on my cheeks.

Now who’s scared of a challenge?

Before I could let my phone ping another one of Rhys’s replies at me, I tapped over to my unanswered conversation with Tamlin and let him know I was still alive.

I sipped on my smoothie - a deep purple from the blueberries that were masking the strawberry and banana - and waited, but he didn’t text back. I sent a casual question mark just in case he hadn’t heard the initial message come through on his end and still nothing. Rhysand, however, was relentless.

I’m scared of a great many things, Feyre and you are not one of them. Come over today and I’ll prove it.

My heart slammed into my chest. The little pricks of guilt I’d felt fluttering in the back of my mind whenever I let the flirtation go too far jumped to life inside me with wild enthusiasm. I was debating how best to turn him down when he sent a second message.

Morrigan and I would like to request a recounting of your first day on the job.

I exhaled a deep sigh of relief. Mor would be there and it was just to hang out. Casual. Friends.

I had friends now. Huh.

But… Tamlin still hadn’t texted back and he said it was urgent. One glance at the clock on my phone told me my break was up. Time to decide.

I sent two texts, one to Tamlin apologizing for missing his messages and that I would call him when work was over and a second one to Rhys to say I’d play it by ear, but what was his address - just in case I needed it of course.

Don’t worry about it, I’ll come pick you up.

I’m already driving. Just tell me, unless you’re so scared of the heels in my trunk, you’ve changed your mind?

His address was his immediate reply.

Rhys’s house was another city monstrosity, but it was older and had more charm to it than the more modern constructions I was used to seeing hanging out around Tamlin and Lucien. Just the simple fact alone that he didn’t have a huge golden gate guarding the driveway or that the driveway was in fact just that - a short paved driveway you didn’t have to hike a mile up to climb - were comforting features.

I rang the door and admired the ivy vines scaling the brick facade of the front entryway - bright greens and rich, muddy red colliding in the warm afternoon sun. And then Rhys opened the door in a crisp burnt orange to match. The dark overhang of the patio cast him in a bit of shadow, but he looked lovely, almost enough to paint.

He looked me over and clicked his tongue. “I don’t see any heals, Feyre darling. Color me disappointed.”

“Disappointed?” My eyes flew wide, but I smirked and stepped forward. “Patience is a virtue. Now are you going to let me inside or not?”

“After you, milady,” and he stepped aside so I could pass into the most normal looking house I could have imagined.

For being contained within walls of luxury and certainly size that boasted money to match, Rhys’s house was noticeably cozy. The furniture looked comfortable enough to sink into and put your feet up on, and no single cabinet nor stand screamed You break it, you buy it! at me.

It was lived in - a home.

Rhys led me towards the kitchen to grab us both a drink and I spied Mor sitting one room over at a large oak dining table - and she wasn’t alone.

Azriel’s delicate face sat next to Mor maintaining at least a full seat’s worth of space between them, but I could have sworn by the way their heads leaned toward each other that they were intertwined. Maybe I was just imagining things between them, but…

“So what’ll it be?” Rhys asked opening the fridge while I listened to Az say something long and complicated to Mor. “I’ve got iced tea, coke, water, milk…”

“Iced tea is fine. Are they studying Calculus?”

Rhys nodded, grabbing the pitcher of iced tea from the fridge and two glasses from the cabinet along with some ice.

“I didn’t know Mor was tutoring. That’s nice of her.”

Rhys paused as he poured our drinks to peer up at me from under his eyelashes. “Az is the one tutoring Mor.”

I narrowed my eyes questioning what I’d heard. “But I see Mor in Calculus every week and she’s-”

“Just getting a little extra help. We all need it now and then,” and he handed me my glass, “don’t we?”

“I suppose so,” I said with a little understanding thrown behind it. “And exactly how long has Azriel been tutoring her?”

“Two years,” Rhys said brisk and cool before glancing slyly at me. “And not a word about it from you.” He flicked me on the nose and strode off. “Come on, I’ll give you the tour.”

“Feyre? Feyre!”

Mor pounced on me as she realized I was there. Azriel gave me his usual hello nod and started shuffling papers on the table to put them away.

“I didn’t know you were coming over today, but oh - this is perfect! You can help me with the signs.”

“Signs?”

Rhys chuckled, lowering himself into a chair with a muttered, “Here we go.”

“Of course, signs for the dance, silly!” Mor started explaining all about the initial adverts she wanted to do to promote Starfall (somehow my name had miraculously stuck) to get people more interested in the dance. “The signs the SBC made last year were downright awful and I’m convinced it’s the reason hardly anyone showed up.”

“You’re just a weirdo who likes dancing until three in the morning,” Rhys chimed in. “Most parents prefer their kids home before midnight so it’s no wonder you danced alone last time.”

“I wasn’t alone!” Mor blushed the moment she said it. “Whatever. The point is I want this dance to be special this year. We’re seniors! We deserve to have some fun with it and,” she took my hand and smiled sweetly at me, “you’re a really, really good artist.”

I scoffed.”You haven’t seen my work.”

“But I’d like to! You can show me some time and it’ll be great.”

I didn’t get a chance to reply because the doorbell rang and Cassian came sweeping into the room.

“Holy mother above, Cassian,” Mor stammered. “What is the point of ringing the doorbell if you’re just going to waltz right in? I’ve asked you so many times not to do that.”

“Calm your tits, Morrigan. It’s not like it’s your bedroom I’m walking in to. Last time I visited that particular door, I was quite happy to walk out.”

Mor’s face flushed right as Azriel rounded the corner. Cassian went still as my eyes darted between them and I thought maybe there was something there for a moment, but then Cassian looked at the binders in Az’s hand, made a crack about how boring math was, and grabbed a can of coke from the fridge.

“Come on, let’s get going,” Cassian said as he popped the lid on his can. “I don’t want to waste my entire afternoon at Target staring at scrapbook paper.”

“It’s posterboard we need and that can be found at Staples. You can stare at the multi-color Sharpies while you wait.”

“Ooh, Sharpies…”

Mor rolled her eyes, but even Az had to concede a small tug up of his lips at that one. “Are you coming with us?” he looked at me and asked nervously.

“Oh, well I, um -”

“We’re staying here,” Rhys said sensing my uncertainty, “to get everything else ready for when you get back.”

Cassian looked skeptical. “But we’re the ones getting everything.”

“Food,” Mor said, stepping in front of him with dry humor. “He means, food.”

“Oh right. Medium rare, man.” He and Rhys did a little head nod maneuver and then Cass moved to clap Az on the shoulder as they walked out, Mor hot on their heels. “I’ll see you when we get back!” she sang at me before gliding out the door.

Leaving Rhys and I behind.

In his house.

Alone.

...

“Want the tour?”

“Sure.”

I think it was really just an excuse to talk and fill the air because after he’d shown me the first floor, we ended up in the back yard on the patio and stayed there. I leaned against the railing and sipped more of my tea, enjoying how cool it was against the heat outside.

“So do Mor and Az, like - do they come over for ‘tutoring’ or whatever often?”

“Az tutors, or whatever it is they’re doing, with her twice a week, but Mor lives here, so she’s around all the time. I can’t get rid of her. She’s surprisingly hard to shake off for being so compact.”

“She lives here?”

“Mhm.” Rhys took a long sip of his drink and stared off the railing. His backyard was large, but save for a swimming pool off the deck, there wasn’t much done with it. Elain could have really spruced it up given the chance. “Mor’s family is… a bit of a mess.”

“Your family, then. If she’s your cousin.”

“Heh,” he scoffed. “Yes, well. My family is a mess all around. My aunt and uncle are severely strict and Mor being Mor as you’ve certainly seen is a bit of a free spirit. Her parents live out of state and wanted her to stay home after she graduated - get married, pop babies out and let her new husband continue the cycle. Morrigan had other plans, of course.”

“What happened?”

“She ran away.” He shrugged like it was as normal as buttering toast for breakfast.

“What - just like that? And from out of state?”

He nodded slowly staring darkly into his drink and I wondered just how bad it was, what he wasn’t telling me. “She turned up on our doorstep about two years ago with a suitcase on one arm and a nasty bruise on the other and it was everything I could do to convince dad not to go talk to her parents personally, he was in such a rage about it. I wouldn’t have had such a hard time with him if it hadn’t been for - well,” he paused, swirling the ice around the inside of his glass pensively. “That’s a story for another time.”

He looked up and his lips stretched into a tight rigid smile that I didn’t recognize on him. It was trying too hard and falling far too short.

I hunched my shoulders and offered, “At least with a house this big you don’t have to share a bathroom. Can you imagine waiting on her in the morning just so you could brush your teeth? Though I imagine your bathroom would be cleaner than it probably is.”

Rhys snorted and flipped around to lean against the railing so that we were facing. “Morrigan is definitely not the clean one. I take that title.”

“High Lord of everything, are we?”

“Precisely when did I lose the presidency in exchange for this ‘High Lord’ business?”

I feigned offence, hand on my chest and jaw agape. “Don’t tell me you can dish it out with the nicknames, but can’t take it thrown back at you.” I ticked off on my fingers, “Darling… Milady… Madame Secretary… Arts Chair… I’ve lost count.”

Rhys’s eyes twinkled. A light breeze ran between us rustling the little curls of his hair. He looked so young standing in the wind like that - simple and happy. I hadn’t realized how much older, how serious amid the banter he’d seemed to me until just then.

“Thank you,” I said suddenly.

“For what?”

“I never thanked you properly for coming over and helping my dad and I move. It meant a lot that you came. That someone did. So… thank you.”

He put his violet eyes on me, perplexed. “Of course. I just wanted to help.”

“Well I appreciate it. I… ah, after my sister got home and Tamlin bailed, I -”

My neck tensed sharply, my eyes going wide. Rhysand looked suddenly alarmed. “What happened? Feyre?”

“I’m such an idiot.” The words were a dead, dejected weight coming out of me. My hand flew to my pocket, but my phone wasn’t there. Of course I’d left it in my purse which was sitting inside Rhys’s house on one of the hooks where I’d first walked in. I darted back inside and started rifling through my stuff to find my phone.

“Feyre, what’s wrong?” Rhys said behind me.

“Nothing, nothing - I just forgot. I was supposed to call Tamlin.”

“Then why are you shaking?”

Was I shaking? I didn’t stop long enough to look or decide why.

I found my phone and illuminated the lockscreen, but there weren’t any new notifications from my boyfriend. Since I was the one who was supposed to call him, I didn’t know if this was a good thing or a bad thing. Knowing Tamlin lately, it could be either.

Rhys came to stand next to me and took the phone from me, replacing it with his hand. His skin felt warm and soft. “Are you always this anxious about receiving phone calls? You should have told me. I can go in the other room and call you if you need to get your fix.”

I shoved him playfully and we broke apart. He handed back my phone. “I’m sorry. I told Tamlin I would call him after I ignored about a million and one text messages from him today and then I completely forgot. It’s been forever since I said I’d call.” I shook my head sighing in frustration with myself. “He’s probably going nuts.”

“But you were working and then you were busy obliging my silly cousin so patiently with her art whims. He’ll understand.”

“I’ve hardly done that much, but it’s fine. It’ll be fine. I should go anyway. Dad was a little… interesting when I left this morning and I should check on him.”

“Feyre, is he-”

“Oh he’s fine!” I blurted.

Rhys’s eyes sort of went hazy as they searched me looking for the truth. “You keep saying that word - fine. Are you sure?”

“Yes, absolutely,” and I took his hand, running my thumb over his palm to reassure him. “Thank you for having me over and listening to me babble and for helping me move and the tea - especially the tea. Iced tea is my favorite.”

He chuckled, but not enough to make his eyes twinkle again. Everything about his body language seemed to tighten. “Come on, I’ll walk you out.”

Rhys opened the car door for me and when I got inside, I rolled my window down so I could say goodbye.

“Will you tell Mor I’m sorry and that I had to get home? I don’t want her to think I don’t care.”

“She knows you care, Feyre. I’ll tell her,” and finally he gave me that smile leaning down against my door - the cool feline one I hadn’t seen yet that was equal parts arrogant and self-righteous, “but you’ll have to make it up to me for my trouble. She’s going to give me an earful about letting you go when she and Cass and Az get back.”

“Isn’t being your Arts Chair or whatever I am good enough?”

“You are always good enough, Feyre darling. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”

“You’re a filthy scheming prick,” I said, dishing back the smugness in my stare. “Don’t let anyone ever tell you otherwise.”

Rhys grinned, obviously pleased with my retort and said, “So we’re back to prick again, eh? And here I thought we were making such progress with ‘High Lord.’”

“What can I say? I call it like I see it.”

“Drive safe, Feyre darling.”

“See you tomorrow, prick.��

Rhys pulled back from the car and I took off feeling very at odds with the day. Work had been a successful first attempt and it was nice to have a niche in my life to call my own. Plus, it would help dad out with the house. It wouldn’t be much - but it was something.

And there was this odd quality to being around Rhys and Mor and their whole brood that I found unsettling in the best possible way. I just couldn’t pinpoint what that was. The more time I spent with them, the more I liked it - liked who I was when I was with them.

It was only Tamlin that had me on edge, my fingernails scratching against the fabric on my thigh as I drove. He hadn’t called, hadn’t replied to any of my messages. I’d said I would call. Sometimes when I didn’t call, he thought I didn’t care, didn’t give him enough attention, and he’d get mad at me. Maybe if I offered to come over again tonight, he’d loosen up and talk to me again.

My head ached just thinking about how much I didn’t want to do it.

A familiar vehicle was sitting in my driveway when I got home that immediately amplified the amount of sweat coming off me. I looked at the front window of the house and saw two figures talking. They weren’t shouting since I couldn’t hear them, but they were definitely having a heated discussion because the hand gestures were flying everywhere. The scratching on my thigh increased.

The car really was there which meant she was too. I opened the front door and found her eyes searing into me as I surveyed the scene taking up my living room. The one she apparently was causing that set my teeth on edge.

Only her.

Nesta.

xx

[flapperfromthefuture]

What if the cure for anxiety was making 70 macaroons in one afternoon?

It’s not, but wouldn’t it be great if it was?

I’d feel so relieved.

We were at my parents’ house for the day, I needed to stress-bake, and even though I’d never made macaroons before, I decided to compensate by making all the macaroons.

There are SO many recipes online that claim to be the “best macaroon recipe” or a “bakery-style macaroon recipe” or a “first place at the county fair recipe” and it stressed me out too much to choose just one—so I picked three recipes and made three batches to scientifically determine once and for all: what is the best macaroon recipe?

SOUND THE CANNON!

I started out with recipe Alpha, the one that got me by claiming, “This is the perfect recipe—for the BEST coconut macaroons! Bakery-style, egg-free, chewy and FULL of coconut!”

It has also been pinned on Pinterest 210,189 times, so someone is doing something right.

But is that something making macaroons? Time to find out.

Recipe Alpha does not require eggs, but calls for 5 and a 1/2 cups of coconut, just under a cup of flour and a whole can of sweetened condensed milk.

The dough came together really easily and I got almost 30 cookies out of it (5 and a 1/2 cups of coconut!). The recipe claimed that macaroons come out denser and more cookie-like without eggs, but they tasted pretty crispy to me. Still chewy, but not half as chewy as a cookie. It was a medium chewy.

Like Chewie’s son, Lumpy, from the Star Wars Holiday Special.

(I would insert a picture of Lumpy, but he is horrifying. Did you ever have a stuffed animal that got stuck behind a dryer? And then looked angry about it forever once you got them out?).

I made a piping bag out of a Ziploc and melted some chocolate chips, and did a little decorating. But something gnawed at me. Could I get a chewier macaroon from a different recipe? One that called for eggs?

I mean, if eggs were the only changed variable, surely I could determine once and for if eggs are essential to a perfect macaroon, right? That’s how science works, according to my liberal arts degree.

So I did some digging around in my own Internet history (man, do I look up a lot of weird murders late at night) and found my second-favorite recipe, recipe Beta.

This is Ina Garten’s recipe, so obviously I was good hands. People at the Food Network vetted this, it has 387 glowing reviews on the website, and I like Ina Garten! She seems like a nice lady! She loves the gays!

So can a fellow gay please give Ina a message for me? Tell her this recipe needs more coconut! Even though it calls for a whole can of condensed milk AND 2 extra-large egg whites, there’s barely 2 cups of coconut. That’s a lot of wet and not a lot of dry!

I ended up panicking and putting another entire cup in the dough, but it was still so runny and wet that I couldn’t get the macaroons to hold their shape at all on the baking sheet. After a few minutes in the oven, they were running like they had a plane to catch.

“What the hell, Ina?” I said out loud.

Obviously, I wasn’t going to throw those misshapen flunkies as my final gauntlet, so it was time for recipe Gamma (you thought I was going to say Omega, didn’t you? What’s up, fanfic! I SEE YOU), which claimed to be the winner of a first-place ribbon at the county fair.

Now, in my previous post, I’ve alluded to how seriously my family takes a good ribbon. A blue ribbon is a badge of honor and quality that can’t be topped.

According to the website, this recipe was also published in a magazine called Reminisce Extra in August of 1996.

What was I doing in August 1996? I was either deep into The Hunchback of Notre Dame soundtrack (the BELLS) which I had to listen to on a physical CD that was purchased in an actual store (gross), or going to see Matilda, but only after I checked the movie times in the newspaper because 1996 was a long effing time ago.

If this recipe survived the jump from magazines to the Internet, it must be good, right?

This recipe calls for 2 extra-large egg whites, like Ina’s recipe, but no condensed milk, so the dry to wet ratio was just about perfect—these definitely scooped out the best of the three recipes, and held their shape beautifully, even when I almost dropped the pan trying to take a picture.

My parents, my sister and A wandered into the kitchen just in time to see an explosion of macaroons.

My mom loves to organize, my sister and A love to scientifically evaluate, and my dad loves cookies.

It was time for a taste test.

Everything was very official, according to the format of those “Coke vs. Pepsi” ads that ran all the time in the ’90s. Everyone, including me, was served a small bite of each macaroon, labeled A, B, and C, and then submitted their rankings on a Post-It.

A, as always, took things about nine steps further than required by ranking the macaroons based on taste, appearance, and chewiness.

Meanwhile, my dad helpfully wrote “All chewy” on his Post-It.

The findings were these: A’s favorite was C—recipe Beta, Ina Garten’s recipe. Even though they were the worst in terms of appearance, she thought they were the sweetest and most like a cookie.

Everyone else ranked C last. Having both eggs and sweetened condensed milk made the macaroons more like regular cookies without enough coconut, making them too sweet and too chewy.

I’ll make the recipe again for A though—she had the brilliant suggestion of making them in muffin cups to keep their shape in the oven.

Even though my sister and I are polar opposites in almost every way, much to the consternation of both our parents and shared Netflix account, we ranked our macaroons exactly the same—with A, recipe Gamma, the blue ribbon winner, as our favorite. We agreed (gasp!) that the blue ribbons were not too chewy, not too crispy, with a strong flavor and smooth texture. Not adding condensed milk kept the sweetness down and the coconut flavor up.

“Wow, you must be related,” said A.

This is a big deal since when my sister talks about the two of us, she tends to to end each statement with, “. . . assuming we have the same parents.”

My parents were baffled to find that they’d ranked their macaroons exactly the same as well—with B in first place.

“Uh-oh, are you related?” I said.

“We just have old taste buds,” said my mom, with a sideways glare at my dad.

My parents  could not be more different in terms of taste buds. My dad loves ice cream and chocolate the way my mom loves Brussel sprouts and asparagus.

She can’t abide sweet, he can’t abide anything green.

If they ever ordered the same thing at a restaurant or one offered to share a dish with the other, I would call the cops.

One time, at Disney World, my mom asked my dad for a taste of his gelato, and he asked if she’d been abducted by aliens. He still mentions it every time we visit Epcot: “That’s the gelato cart where Mom asked for a bite of my gelato. I thought I was hallucinating.”

On the other hand, my mom has almost called 911 on the rare occasions that my dad has willingly eaten a vegetable.

And yet, by some miracle, they both preferred the bakery-style macaroons with no eggs. They liked that recipe Alpha was the driest of the three and thus had a crispier texture—and thought it had the most flavor.

“I could really taste the vanilla in that one,” said my mom.

“There was vanilla in this?” said my dad.

And so, the great macaroon experiment concluded. Naturally, I am looking ahead to my next baking frenzy—next time, it might involve sprinkles.

    The Great Macaroon Experiment What if the cure for anxiety was making 70 macaroons in one afternoon? It's not, but wouldn't it be great if it was?

[ethanalter]

Emmys: 'Crazy Ex-Girlfriend' songwriting team talks 'We Tapped That Ass'

(Photo: CW)

Heading into this year’s Emmy nomination process, the Crazy Ex-Girlfriend songwriting team — which includes the show’s co-creator and star, Rachel Bloom, as well as executive music producer Adam Schlesinger and music consultant/staff writer Jack Dolgen — planned to submit four tunes for awards consideration. But as the deadline approached, Schlesinger knew there was one surefire winner from the show’s second season: a tap-dancing ditty called “We Tapped That Ass.” Performed by Vincent Rodriguez III and Santino Fontana in their finest Gene Kelly/Donald O’Connor form, the song is a roll call of all the places where Bloom’s troubled heroine, Rebecca Bunch, has had sex with the two men in her life: buff Josh (Rodriguez) and emo Greg (Fontana). Why did Schlesinger know the tune would resonate with Emmy voters? Simple: “Everyone just likes the word ass!” the Fountains of Wayne bassist tells Yahoo TV. “It’s a crowdpleaser.”

Sure enough, “We Tapped that Ass” is the most eye-catching title amongst the six nominees for Outstanding Original Music and Lyrics. (For the record, the trio also submitted the hilarious Marilyn Monroe pastiche “The Math of Love Triangles,” which didn’t make the final cut.) It’s the second year in a row that Crazy Ex-Girlfriend has been represented in this category, with the Season 1 favorite “Settle For Me” getting a nod last year. Sadly, because this award is presented at the non-televised Creative Arts Emmy Awards, we won’t get to see Rodriguez and Fontana (whose character left the show midway through Season 2) sing lyrics like “I banged you here, I nailed you there” and “On the table you were willing and able” in front of such nominated actors as Robert De Niro and Jessica Lange on Emmy night. But the song’s writers are still giddily ass-tonished to be in the running for a second year.

Bloom, Schlesinger, and Dolgen filled us in on how “We Tapped that Ass” came to be and the two things about the song that network censors found too… cheeky.

What are the origins of “We Tapped that Ass”? Rachel Bloom: We had known for a while that we wanted to do a “Moses Supposes“-style number, but dirtier. Like, “We f**ked you there, we f**ked you here.” [We liked] the idea of Rebecca being overwhelmed by her memories and the wordplay of her memories, and we had a lot of the internal jokes in the song thought up. As an internal joke, Jack pitched the line, “We tapped that ass all over this house.” And Adam and I were like, “F**k you, Jack, that’s the chorus!”

Adam Schlesinger: And then we beat the s**t out of Jack!

Jack Dolgen: It was really confusing. [Laughs]

Schlesinger: On the musical side, a lot of times, Rachel or Jack will send me something that’s [a] pretty-formed melody and I may or may not tweak it a little bit. With this one, we basically just kicked around jokes for a half an hour until I had a bunch to choose from. We didn’t have any kind of a melody. We were doing a little rhythm while improvising the jokes, so I took that and came up with the melody later.

Bloom: In another genre, it’s a song that could have felt, for lack of a better term, rapey. Because it’s in a playful genre, it’s threatening without being distractingly threatening. It helped knowing that Vincent and Santino have tap-dancing skills. It’s been fun to write to the skills of the actors on the show.

Dolgen: It doesn’t hurt that Vincent has every tertiary skill imaginable! He’s acrobatic, he does karate; I’m waiting for the unicycle juggling song.

Schlesinger: Rachel has telekinesis and we haven’t used that yet either.

You get away with some pretty filthy jokes in the song. Did you have any issues with the network?

Bloom: Every time we come up with a new song, we send the lyrics to S&P; everything also gets sent to S&P.

Schlesinger: That’s Salt-N-Pepa she’s referring to. They wrote “Push It.” We love their work.

Bloom: Sorry, Standards and Practices! [Laughs] We sent this song in and it mostly passed. The only thing that was problematic was the ending. Originally, the guys said, “Where should we finish? How about on her chest!” And S&P was like, “You can’t say this! Are you insane?” And I said, “Okay, what if Rebecca says, ‘Please not on my chest’ and then immediately adds, ‘You’ll scratch it.’ So she’s actually talking about the chest [in the house].

Dolgen: That wound up being a second joke in the original joke, which was awesome. I remember they also wanted to make sure that when the guys tap dance on the giant butt, the butt had underwear on it. You can’t show a bare ass even if it’s a piece of staging, I suppose.

(Photo: CW)

What lyric are you proudest of? “On the ottoman, you took a lotta man” is memorable for sure.

Schlesinger: “Back patio” is pretty good.

Bloom: I like the run about them doing an impression of Rebecca when she’s trying to have an orgasm and she’s directing them. That one is very relatable. And whoever came up with, “On the safe in the closet, I made a deposit,” hats off to you! Such a great line.

Dolgen: This song is all killer, no filler. I think about the lyrics and how once it starts it doesn’t really let up. I’m proud about that. It’s a tight, funny song all the way through. Not to toot our own horn.

Or pat your own asses.

Bloom: Right! When I listen to the song, I’m impressed with all of the places Rebecca did have sex all over her house.

Dolgen: Also [how it works] just as a video. These Emmy submissions aren’t just audio submissions, they’re basically music video submissions. The episode was directed by Erin Ehrlich and the sequence was choreographed by Kat Burns. It’s such a huge team effort to make these things, and the combination of music and dance came together to make it what it is.

Schlesinger: Even though it’s a goofy, silly subject, there’s a lot of virtuosity at work. It gives everyone a chance to show off their skills. They had to record the actual tap sounds later, because they’re not wearing tap shoes.

Bloom: Vinnie and Kat got into the recording booth after the fact, and tapped on wood, right?

Schlesinger: Yeah, and that’s why Kat as a choreographer really contributed musically to the song. The sound of those [tap] rhythms is a big part of the rhythm of the track. When we first orchestrated it, we left an empty space so the rhythm could come from their feet.

Dolgen: We’ll have written over 100 songs for this show by the time Season 3 airs, and each song gets its own special treatment as a music video. One of the coolest things about doing this show is that we get to do all these different genres and visual experiences depending on the song. Like “Settle for Me,” which we were nominated for last year, is totally different from this one. It was done black-and-white and looked like this old-school number.

It certainly can’t be lost on you that both of your Emmy-nominated songs harken back to an older era of Hollywood. “Settle For Me” is vintage Astaire and Rogers, while this is more Kelly and O’Connor. Do you think that reflect the tastes of the voting membership at all?

Bloom: Adam, you’ve met more [Emmy] people…

Schlesinger: Adam, you’re old — what do you think?

Bloom: Yeah, that’s what I meant! [Laughs] I think they do like the old Hollywood stuff. Not to sound old myself, but there’s a certain musicality to stuff that harkens back to a golden age that you sometimes don’t get with modern music, which is so much about the production. It’s amazing production on a few very simple chords. With a song like this, there’s a lot going on musically that a lot of times you don’t get in modern music.

Dolgen: That’s one of the appeals of doing a multi-genre musical like we do. We get to do old-school pop numbers, modern pop stuff, country songs, and rap songs. We really travel around, and Adam’s flexibility and chameleon quality as a music producer allows us to be completely imaginative without restrictions. He can produce a song in any genre and really nail it.

(Photo: CW)

As you alluded to before, there’s a lot going on thematically in the song as well. It’s not just a goof.

Bloom: The thing I think people forget about the show is that the silly songs are very rarely silly for silly’s sake. There’s usually a strong emotional undercurrent. We’re not the kind of songwriters who are going to write a song called “I Really Like Cats,” with lyrics like “Cats are fun, I really like cats.” I don’t have an interest in doing songs like that.

Schlesinger: Well there goes that pitch!

Bloom: Oh, great! [Laughs] We write this show like a musical, and there’s an old adage in musical theater: “When the emotion is too strong to speak you sing. And when the emotion is too strong to sing, you dance.” We really do use that as a guideline in our songwriting. “We Tapped that Ass” precipitates Rachel having a nervous breakdown and trying to burn down her apartment. “Settle for Me” is the mantra of a guy who has time and time again looked down on himself and gone for women who don’t want him.

Do you think that viewers are picking up on those deeper ideas?

Bloom: We are still a cult show, but I will say that the people who do watch the show are quite smart.

Dolgen: Both of them.

Bloom: Both people who watch the show — my mom and Jack’s mom — really get the complexity. I think it’s a really big deal that we’re about to hit 100 songs, and I just hope that the audience continues to grow and that people appreciate that no one has ever done that. No one’s every done what we’re doing on TV before.

Schlesinger: These are all original comedy songs that have quite a dramatic element to them. We don’t phone a single song in. We hold ourselves to a really high standard. Doing that with as many songs as we do on this show is an insane undertaking that was probably a mistake! [Laughs]

Unlike the Oscars, the Emmy-nominated songs aren’t performed live at the ceremony. Would you love to see Santino and Vincent sing “We Tapped that Ass” onstage?

Bloom: Totally! If you could hook that up, that would be great. We’re such whores on this show: we’ll do anything for anyone, anywhere. [Laughs] The other thing is that this is not an award given at the main Emmy awards. It’s part of the Creative Arts Emmys, which is seen as a lesser awards show, because it’s not the fancy primetime Emmys. But it’s still a f**king Emmy!

You’re up against nominees that include Saturday Night Live, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, and a Mickey Mouse Christmas special, Duck the Halls. If you don’t win, do you have a favorite that you hope does get the Emmy?

Bloom: They’re all great songs. I will truly be shocked if we win. Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt‘s song is a 1:1 parody of Lemonade, which is very hip. And “Last Christmas” [from SNL] is about the last Christmas with President Obama. Because we are a show that writes and films months and months before we go on the air, we never have songs that are super-topical, because by the time they air, they’ll be old. I think topical stuff tends to have an advantage. But the other nominees are all fantastic.

Do you have a plan to get your own Disney Channel holiday special? That might be another good way to get a nomination.

Dolgen: Yeah, maybe “F**k the Halls.” It’s all about communal living where you don’t like to have any hallways. [Laughs]

You’re midway through making Season 3 right now. Do you already have your Emmy submission for next year?

Bloom: We have a couple! This is my favorite season. I think the songwriting we’re doing is some of our best work, and I think I can think of two or three options right now. I’m immensely proud of the work we’ve been doing.

Dolgen: We’ve got maybe 16 songs written and close to in the can. I’ll echo Rachel: I’m pretty excited about the songs we’re writing for Season 3, and the videos are turning out incredibly. You’re going to see some incredible stuff from Rachel. It’s going to be an exciting season in a lot of ways, and the musical numbers are no exception.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Season 3 premieres Friday, Oct. 13 on The CW. The first two seasons are currently streaming on Netflix.

[flapperfromthefuture]

What if the cure for anxiety was making 70 macaroons in one afternoon?

It’s not, but wouldn’t it be great if it was?

I’d feel so relieved.

We were at my parents’ house for the day, I needed to stress-bake, and even though I’d never made macaroons before, I decided to compensate by making all the macaroons.

There are SO many recipes online that claim to be the “best macaroon recipe” or a “bakery-style macaroon recipe” or a “first place at the county fair recipe” and it stressed me out too much to choose just one—so I picked three recipes and made three batches to scientifically determine once and for all: what is the best macaroon recipe?

SOUND THE CANNON!

I started out with recipe Alpha, the one that got me by claiming, “This is the perfect recipe—for the BEST coconut macaroons! Bakery-style, egg-free, chewy and FULL of coconut!”

It has also been pinned on Pinterest 210,189 times, so someone is doing something right.

But is that something making macaroons? Time to find out.

Recipe Alpha does not require eggs, but calls for 5 and a 1/2 cups of coconut, just under a cup of flour and a whole can of sweetened condensed milk.

The dough came together really easily and I got almost 30 cookies out of it (5 and a 1/2 cups of coconut!). The recipe claimed that macaroons come out denser and more cookie-like without eggs, but they tasted pretty crispy to me. Still chewy, but not half as chewy as a cookie. It was a medium chewy.

Like Chewie’s son, Lumpy, from the Star Wars Holiday Special.

(I would insert a picture of Lumpy, but he is horrifying. Did you ever have a stuffed animal that got stuck behind a dryer? And then looked angry about it forever once you got them out?).

I made a piping bag out of a Ziploc and melted some chocolate chips, and did a little decorating. But something gnawed at me. Could I get a chewier macaroon from a different recipe? One that called for eggs?

I mean, if eggs were the only changed variable, surely I could determine once and for if eggs are essential to a perfect macaroon, right? That’s how science works, according to my liberal arts degree.

So I did some digging around in my own Internet history (man, do I look up a lot of weird murders late at night) and found my second-favorite recipe, recipe Beta.

This is Ina Garten’s recipe, so obviously I was good hands. People at the Food Network vetted this, it has 387 glowing reviews on the website, and I like Ina Garten! She seems like a nice lady! She loves the gays!

So can a fellow gay please give Ina a message for me? Tell her this recipe needs more coconut! Even though it calls for a whole can of condensed milk AND 2 extra-large egg whites, there’s barely 2 cups of coconut. That’s a lot of wet and not a lot of dry!

I ended up panicking and putting another entire cup in the dough, but it was still so runny and wet that I couldn’t get the macaroons to hold their shape at all on the baking sheet. After a few minutes in the oven, they were running like they had a plane to catch.

“What the hell, Ina?” I said out loud.

Obviously, I wasn’t going to throw those misshapen flunkies as my final gauntlet, so it was time for recipe Gamma (you thought I was going to say Omega, didn’t you? What’s up, fanfic! I SEE YOU), which claimed to be the winner of a first-place ribbon at the county fair.

Now, in my previous post, I’ve alluded to how seriously my family takes a good ribbon. A blue ribbon is a badge of honor and quality that can’t be topped.

According to the website, this recipe was also published in a magazine called Reminisce Extra in August of 1996.

What was I doing in August 1996? I was either deep into The Hunchback of Notre Dame soundtrack (the BELLS) which I had to listen to on a physical CD that was purchased in an actual store (gross), or going to see Matilda, but only after I checked the movie times in the newspaper because 1996 was a long effing time ago.

If this recipe survived the jump from magazines to the Internet, it must be good, right?

This recipe calls for 2 extra-large egg whites, like Ina’s recipe, but no condensed milk, so the dry to wet ratio was just about perfect—these definitely scooped out the best of the three recipes, and held their shape beautifully, even when I almost dropped the pan trying to take a picture.

My parents, my sister and A wandered into the kitchen just in time to see an explosion of macaroons.

My mom loves to organize, my sister and A love to scientifically evaluate, and my dad loves cookies.

It was time for a taste test.

Everything was very official, according to the format of those “Coke vs. Pepsi” ads that ran all the time in the ’90s. Everyone, including me, was served a small bite of each macaroon, labeled A, B, and C, and then submitted their rankings on a Post-It.

A, as always, took things about nine steps further than required by ranking the macaroons based on taste, appearance, and chewiness.

Meanwhile, my dad helpfully wrote “All chewy” on his Post-It.

The findings were these: A’s favorite was C—recipe Beta, Ina Garten’s recipe. Even though they were the worst in terms of appearance, she thought they were the sweetest and most like a cookie.

Everyone else ranked C last. Having both eggs and sweetened condensed milk made the macaroons more like regular cookies without enough coconut, making them too sweet and too chewy.

I’ll make the recipe again for A though—she had the brilliant suggestion of making them in muffin cups to keep their shape in the oven.

Even though my sister and I are polar opposites in almost every way, much to the consternation of both our parents and shared Netflix account, we ranked our macaroons exactly the same—with A, recipe Gamma, the blue ribbon winner, as our favorite. We agreed (gasp!) that the blue ribbons were not too chewy, not too crispy, with a strong flavor and smooth texture. Not adding condensed milk kept the sweetness down and the coconut flavor up.

“Wow, you must be related,” said A.

This is a big deal since when my sister talks about the two of us, she tends to to end each statement with, “. . . assuming we have the same parents.”

My parents were baffled to find that they’d ranked their macaroons exactly the same as well—with B in first place.

“Uh-oh, are you related?” I said.

“We just have old taste buds,” said my mom, with a sideways glare at my dad.

My parents  could not be more different in terms of taste buds. My dad loves ice cream and chocolate the way my mom loves Brussel sprouts and asparagus.

She can’t abide sweet, he can’t abide anything green.

If they ever ordered the same thing at a restaurant or one offered to share a dish with the other, I would call the cops.

One time, at Disney World, my mom asked my dad for a taste of his gelato, and he asked if she’d been abducted by aliens. He still mentions it every time we visit Epcot: “That’s the gelato cart where Mom asked for a bite of my gelato. I thought I was hallucinating.”

On the other hand, my mom has almost called 911 on the rare occasions that my dad has willingly eaten a vegetable.

And yet, by some miracle, they both preferred the bakery-style macaroons with no eggs. They liked that recipe Alpha was the driest of the three and thus had a crispier texture—and thought it had the most flavor.

“I could really taste the vanilla in that one,” said my mom.

“There was vanilla in this?” said my dad.

And so, the great macaroon experiment concluded. Naturally, I am looking ahead to my next baking frenzy—next time, it might involve sprinkles.

    The Great Macaroon Experiment What if the cure for anxiety was making 70 macaroons in one afternoon? It's not, but wouldn't it be great if it was?