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feminist-propaganda · 3 years ago

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Maid Is A Film About Jungian Archetypes - Episode 6 : The Maiden

Have you ever noticed that a lot of stories involve a young female character that is vulnerable and needs to be rescued by a knight in shining armous? Isn't that what all fairy tales are about ? Like the role Jennifer Lopez plays in Maid in Manhattan. Or perhaps you remember Lily Allen's song "22", it came out it 2009. It's a sad but important song about how when you're nearly 30 "society says your life is already over". She talks about having an all-right job but "not a career" and of course the longing for the man of her dreams to come around & pick her up and put her over his shoulder. The Maiden, ladies and gentlemen.

What both of these things have in common is, of course, the Damsel in Distress archetype. One of the oldest versions of this collective image is from ancient Grece - and it tells us about the origins of Winter.

Briefly - Persephone, the daughter of Demeter, is captured by the ruler of the Underworld : Hades. Demeter, goddess of Agriculture, looks for her daughter Persephone desperately. Because she is so distraight, she forbids the crops to grow while she is in mourning for her lost child. Pressured by the rest of the Pantheon, Hades has to give up Persephone. But right before he does that, he forces her to eat three pomegranate seeds. Because of this, Persephone must spend three months of the year in the Underworld with him. While she's away, the crops stop growing, and it is the time of Winter.

Maidens are always innocent, pure and vulnerable. But they're a moment in time, a part of a Woman's life - not her long term end goal. Obviously, Western culturn has a bit of an obsession with Maidens. Grown women want to look young forever, and they're willing to do whatever it takes to achieve that: botox, face lifts, plastic surgery, implants, night creams and worst of all: spandex.

There's something that deeply deranges me about the fact that after having children, a woman's body is considered shameful. Her life now becomes a fight between her and her abdominal pouch. She's willing to drink disgusting teas just to have the stomache of a 16-year-old. All of this so that she doesn't look like she's grown a full human being inside of her body for 9 months. I mean, she has a pouch, what's the big deal? What did the pouch ever do to the world? Why do we hate it so much?

Is it just me that this bothers? It feels like to all of y'all it's logical to get a body trainer, a nutritionist and a pharmacist to work for you to "get your body back". Where did your body even go?

In a sketch by SNL from May 2015, Reese Witherspoon and Cecily Strong ridicule these Hollywood 40-year-olds that casually discuss their plastic surgeons but then can't control their bodily functions (the characters go off set and are heard farting and talking about maxi-pads).

The truth is: our current culture is not giving us a whole lot of guidance when it comes to how to age gracefully when you're a woman. The injunction seems to be: please don't age, because it's disgusting. But then, if we try too hard to appear like we're not ageing, we're also ridiculed. We can't really win. Bummer.

This episode of Maid is about the Maiden archetype and how Alex needs to identify it for what it is and most importantly: grow out of it. And she's about to learn that the hard way.

Archetype 6: The Maiden

The Episode starts like a fairy tale. Alex is seen breathing deeply and feeling united with Nature in the great outdoors of Missoula. She's hiking the M, rowing down the river on her kayak, and listening to her favorite Salt'n'Peppa cassette in her car.

The scene cuts to the Group Therapy session with the fellow survivors of the Domestic Violence shelter. Alex talks about her childhood: how she would skateboard outside the school, the dreams she had, how she almost went to college that one time. Now she's 25, she lives with her mom and her kid in an RV and she scrubs toilets for a living. She's not sure what happened to her. (Remember Lily Allen singing "She's thinking how did I get here? She's wondering: How?)

But we know how she got here. We saw Episode 2, which exposed Alex's Animus. We know that she was enrolled in college, that she was reading the books from the curriculum ahead of the fall semester. We remember she "met" a hunky guy at Brunch and that she had loads of unprotected sex with him outside his trailer- mostly because he read Bukowski. She got pregnant that summer and the rest is history.

I'm sure Alex wanted to go study litterature in Missoula, I don't want to question that. But I do think it was hard for her to visualize it happening. In our culture, there's a Maiden archetype, but there isn't a Scholar Woman archetype. This means we have a lot of models and images teaching us young ladies how to be great damsels in distress, but very little examples of how we could go to school, get an education and then become experts in our own fields.

I don't think it's impossible for us to do this - but I think that sticking to the archetype will reward us in many ways. It will make us feel well adjusted to the culture, and normal. Let me be clear: sticking to the archetype means that when we buy Kim Kardashian's body sculpting underwear we feel like we're a part of something bigger and it feels good. That's a chemical reward going on in your brain. Whereas if you go to university to study litterature and to become a writer, there will be plenty of discomfort along the way. You'll feel very lonely. People will second guess you, critics will tear down your work, you might not have good female role models around you that are willing to mentor you. Only one of those paths leads to growth. I'll let you guess which.

In the next scene, Alex is with her case worker at Social services, and they're talking about housing solutions. Alex's attitude has changed a lot since the beginning of the series. She's now asking questions to the case worker rather than following directions. They discuss a program that is great because as a low income household you can receive government subsidies if you can't afford the rent, all you have to do is convince the landlord to agree to fill in the paperwork and opt into the program.

We then witness Alex trying to convince several owners to commit to the program, but none of them are interested: in fact one of them evens slams the door in her face.

Interestingly, Alex doesn't use the Maiden approach with them. In fact, she hasn't been acting like a Maiden recently - apart from the flashback scene of her in Missoula. Ever since the series started, Alex has been exploring aspects of her psyche (Anima, Shadow, Persona) as well as paying attention to the helpful images around her (The Mother, The Wise Old Man). But she hasn't been wearing lipstick, she hasn't bumped into a beautiful stranger on the street who helped her pick up the important papers she scattered all over the pavement. In fact, whenever someone tried to be chivalrous with her (looking at you Nate) she shut 'em down and told 'em her life was not set up for dating.

The most romantic moment she had was with the boy she Tinder-matched with on Thanksgiving, but she was just using him to try out a Persona. She didn't tell him how fragile she was, what problems she was dealing with - she didn't want him to save her.

Instead, with the landlords, Alex tries to be assertive, or funny and even raunchy. None of that works. The strategies Alex tries are a bit weird, clumsy. It's like she doesn't know how to present it all in a mature, reasoned way. She's not being the Maiden (that would be crying or over-sharing or begging), but she's not channeling a distinctive kind of energy either. It's all quite blurry.

After that, we see Alex drop off Maddy with Sean - they meet at a bakery. Sean is with Alex's father who is supporting him on his journey to sobriety. Sean talks to her about getting sober and the breakthroughs he's experienced. Alex doesn't react well, she makes the conversation about her instead of encouraging Sean.

He becomes hurt, and she apologizes. And then Sean says something interesting. There must be a part of you, he suggests, that's upset that I'm only doing this now. What he means is that he could've started this work when she was still with him, when they were still a couple. That could've saved their relationship. Alex denies feeling this way, instead deflects and mentions that the sobriety is a good thing for Maddy.

This is fascinating, because it shows us that Alex doesn't really know how to relate to this whole situation anymore. She used to be the damsel in distress - for sure. The girl hiking the M, the lady reading out her poetry at Brunch: those are very vulnerable, pure, ladylike ways to occupe one's time. Now she has a kid, who she cares about. But what about her? She must have some feelings? She must have some opinions about her ex being sober, opinions that don't have anything to do with their 3 year old.

Sean wants her to feel jealous, envious, needy - but that's what the Maiden would do. The Maiden is locked up in the donjon all day, perhaps she's asleep, waiting for Prince charming to come home and be sober. The Maiden is needy, the Maiden is jealous, the Maiden smells your coat and recognizes the scent of another woman on the fabric. What does Alex do? What's beyond the Maiden? How do we grow out of her? And who do we grow into when we stop being Maidens?

When Alex comes home that night, she finds her mother Paula and her new husband looking under the hood of the car. Alex and her stepfather get into a bit of an argument, and the height of the tension occurs when she's able to diferentiate between the radiator and the carburator - which he can't.

Alex's mother is mortified by her daughter's attitude (so un-ladylike), she compensates with ever more kisses and caresses for her new husband. She then asks Alex when she's getting her own place - the situation is unbearable for all of them. Paula needs her intimacy back.

Paula is the perfect example of a woman stuck in her maiden phase. She giggles and makes out with her boyfriend like an immature teenager. It feels odd, as if she's playing a role, a role she knows too well because she's been rehearsing for it all her life.

The next morning, Alex visits the daycare her friend Nate has recommeneded, it's on Fischer Island. There could be a spot for Maddy, and the family could be aided by the community to make the payments, but she needs an address in Fischer Island. Alex looks up apartments to rent on the Island, visits a beautiful studio full of light and in the back yard of a house owned by an adorable lesbian couple.

She barters cleaning and landscaping work for a half of the rent - et voila! Alex has a house and a great day care for Maddy. All in a day. She is litterally dancing as she goes to pick up her daughter, and moves out of the RV and drops off Maddy at the new daycare. For a marvelous second - life is good.

It's Maddy's birthday on Saturday - she's turning three. And the lesbian couple insists that Alex should host the party in the garden.

Alex refuses, but the couple insists - so Alex finally caves. That's what a Maiden would do. Please people, don't say no, don't make boundaries with them, it's too uncomfortable. The real answer should've been "Thank you for the offer. Please don't insist, I feel more comfortable hosting this party in the park". Instead it turns into "Fine."

The birthday party starts well - Nate is there and he brought his kid. He entertains the toddlers while Alex mingles in the back. Her friend Tania is there - we only ever saw her in Episode 1, when she offered Alex to stay at her house, where she was having a party and then in Episode 2 in the flashback at Brunch.

Alex talks to Tania as if nothing's changed. "What"s new?" she says - Tania announces she's engaged. Her relationship however seems to be heavier than it was a couple of months ago. Her fiance hisses at her to scratch his back, then makes a comment about how expensive the ring was. He seems very bored until he sees Sean arrive with this new girlfriend Frankie. Then his face lights up. Tania looks miserable.

See, Tania's story is very interesting because it shows us that no matter what we do, no matter how much we try to delay it, we can't resist the transition out of Maidenhood, sooner or later it will be upon us. Tania seems to be a girl who's held onto it as long as she could: she's still partying like she's a sophomore in high school. And when Alex tries to talk to her - woman to woman - about her ordeal with Sean she claims neutrality. "I'm Switzerland".

Tania secretely resents Alex for moving out of Maidenhood, not because she doesn't like that for Alex, but because she doesn't like that for herself. She doesn't want to look tired or feel stressed. She wants to be a young, beautiful woman forever. Don't we all? Maidenhood is put on a pedestal on our culture. Everything teens say or do is magical, special and worthy of all of our attention. But when it's a woman in her thirties talking, and making excellent points in an articulate way - then all we can hear is "What a bitter old hag" or the always handy "She looks like she could use a good fuck" and so on and so forth.

Alex is more than just irritated by the presence of Frankie, Sean's new girlfriend. She's openly jealous. She calls her a 9-year old and scolds Sean for bringing a date to his kid's birthday.

This is how we know Alex has not completely transitioned out of Maidenhood - she's still jealous of Frankie, she still sees her as a rival. She still thinks Frankie and herself are in the same league. They're not. Because Motherhood always trumps Maidenhood. Motherhood cancels Maidenhood. You can't go back to Maidenhood once you're a mother. You can simply resist - and that only creates suffering for you. But Alex hasn't come to terms with all of that yet. It takes time. Trial and error. Today'll be the error for sure.

Frankie calls the birthday party boring, and Alex's mom is begging for booze. Alex tries to stop these things fro, happening but no one listens to her. People order weed, and alcohol, put music, dance. They're trashing the house and ruining the party. But Alex isn't standing up for herself. Instead she asks for inside voices.

By the time the booze gets delivered by one of Frankie's guys - the party is completely transformed - it's now a frat house.

Frankie and her girlfriends are dancing suggestively, there is loud urban music playing in the background, and Paula is laughing too loudly, a glass of whiskey in her hand.

Eventually, Paula paints everybodies faces and Alex manages to kill the party. As the group of young girls leave, Paula screams "You gals are gonna change the wrold". They won't, of course. But that's the thing about the cult of Maidenhood: it doesn't make any fucking sense.

The mother, the grandmother and the daughter fall asleep in Alex's studio apartment that night - and all is well.

Except it's not. In the early hours of the morning, Sean breaks into the owner's house, strips off his clothers and falls asleep on the couch.

And just like that - Alex is homeless again.

#maid #netflix #feminine #domestic violence #maiden #damsel in distress

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