#I also gave my brother a token even tho he said he didn’t want it and then he got a sushi cat it was so cute
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yakultii · 1 month ago
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bought totoro earrings & got a lil cat cow from lucky dip token machine !! this was the exact cat I wanted out of all the cats bc i lov cats and cows even more or maybe the same idk ahh I love cats and cows and I got it first try !! I think the universe was rewarding me for going out of my way to at least try to live my life today :) as I normally defs would not have feeling the way I do on a day life today but anyway when I was in the shop I was like to my brother “isn’t it funny how the earth could just get hit by an asteroid like we aren’t even real we are just nature and yet humans have gone and produced all these little things, like there’s just so many things and like why” and he was like “yeah they don’t stand a chance”
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annavoncleves · 4 years ago
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the saga of henry the young king
ok so, henry the young king, eldest (living) son of henry ii (he did have an older brother, william, but william died as a baby so in practice henry's oldest) dad's the king of england, lord of wales and ireland, count of anjou and maine and aquitaine, and eventually brittany
lots of titles, lots of sons as well, and rather than the oldest son getting everything like comes in later (unless he's an only child/only has sisters) at this point he has to share with his brothers, though he does get the Best Cut, which in this case is the kingship of england
BUT
kingdoms are a lil different to other realms, in that, whilst counties and duchys can be split whilst dad's still alive, bc those are vassals of the kingdom, the throne can't be split up, obviously
so even though henry is named 'henry the young king' (an attempt at securing the throne, after the absolute clusterfuck that happened to henry ii's mother, empress matilda, whose throne was stolen by her cousin stephen after her father's death, bc she was a) a woman, gasp and b) the lords of england didn't think SWEARING AN OATH TO RECOGNISE HER AS QUEEN BEFORE THEIR KING AND PEERS was BINDING ENOUGH, so that henry's chosen heir would. actually get the throne when he died) he has no actual power
which tbh, looking at his record, is probably a good thing, bc although he thought a lot of himself, he wasn't actually that great a leader of men
he was a very good jouster tho, but that's neither here nor there 
SO. henry ii is king. henry the young king is basically the king-in-waiting, whilst all his legitimate* younger brothers get THEIR inheritances (well, richard and geoffrey do, getting aquitaine and brittany. john - later known as bad king john, yes the bad guy in robin hood, he's based off THIS john - is the youngest and doesn't get shit, gaining him the nickname 'lackland') 
*henry ii was a bit of a slut, but all kings were, and was actually pretty good to his bastard sons, by the standards of the day, anyway. he made one of them an important bishop and gave the other a position at court. fun fact, when henry ii does eventually die, it's one of his illegitimate sons at his bedside, and none of his legitimate sons
[in the words of the astounding @searchingforserendipity25: “to be the only illegitimate son at that bedside, crowded by all those absences” damn queen, go off]
BUT. henry the young king, king in name, but JUNIOR king, and only titular. younger brothers get their lands. he's pissed.
daaaaad, he whines, i want a go at ruling now
i'm ruling now, wait your turn, henry ii says
no, fuck you, henry the young king says and starts a rebellion
despite being... well, a bit useless, henry the young king is VERY popular (idk, bc he was moderately handsome and good at jousting?? it makes no sense to me why the people liked him as much as they did, he didn't exactly do anything to earn their love or allegiance as far as i can see) and quite a few lords get behind him
also wanting a bigger portion than they've been given, richard and geoffrey join the rebellion, bc they want more of that sweet, sweet land, as does their mother eleanor of aquitaine who fell out with her husband at some point
henry ii, against all expectations, successfully puts down the rebellion and henry the young king et al are in troubleeee, but henry ii can't afford to really punish his ungrateful offspring as much as he'd probably like, so he goes the other way and gives henry the young king a nice big allowance to keep him happy, which works for a little bit
then henry the young king, beautiful imbecile that he is, decides he's gonna rebel again. it ends the same way. he's just not very good at war, is the only conclusion i can come to
SO the second rebellion is in progress (henry the young king is allied with his brother geoffrey again, but not richard, who appears to have learned his lesson... for now. richard does rebel again later, but he waits for the right moment, proving he had some degree of intelligence that the other two... lacked) when henry the young king gets sick
i'm gonna have to copy and paste from wikipedia for this bit to explain what he was sick WITH bc there is no way i can beat this: "[Henry] had just finished pillaging local monasteries to raise money to pay his mercenaries [when] he contracted dysentery at the beginning of June."
you heard that right
he got dysentry whilst PILLAGING CHURCHES
it was a real Bruh moment for karma
anyway, he starts getting sicker and sicker until it becomes clear He Ain't Surviving This, at which point he does what a lot of people do when faced with the reality of their own mortality: say 'oh shit, i fucked up' and try and apologise
he's also pretty out of it so at some point in a presumably feverish stupor 'as a token of his penitence for his war against his father, he prostrated himself naked on the floor before a crucifix'. just stripped off, got on his belly, presumably in one of the few moments he was not shitting himself, and says 'lol my bad'
unfortunately for henry the young king, he's got form for being a tricksy, underhanded bitch. (seriously, why was he so popular?? enquiring minds - mine - would like to know) and when the messenger gets to his dad saying 'welp, i'm dying, i'm real sorry about the wars, come see me on my deathbed?
henry ii takes one look at that and goes: 'he's not really dying, is he?’
the messenger: uh. yeah. really dying.
henry ii: sounds fake
the messenger: no, he's really really sorry and really really dying
henry ii: this is Definitely A Trap
so henry ii isn't gonna be taken to a secondary location to get imprisoned or murdered by his rebellious son, which u can't entirely blame him for, considering henry the young king is currently In The Process Of Attempting To Depose Him when this all goes down, BUT henry ii also figures that if his son really is dying, and he doesn't grant him forgiveness, then he's gonna be haunted by that shit/his son won't find peace/bad things will happen. so he takes one of his rings and gives it to the messenger and says, take this to my son as a token of my forgiveness. the ring couldn't come from anyone else, so henry the young king will know it really comes from his father, and henry ii doesn't get possibly murdered, so everybody wins!
messenger goes back to henry the young king, who we presume has now got some clothes on, or at least a strategically placed sheet, and gives him the ring. as expected, henry the young king dies soon after, get this, holding the ring that his father sent him.
like. i don't think he was a good king. i don't think he would've been a good king. but. he dies holding onto this ring. and he's got a lot of people around him, but his dad isn't there, just this ring. 
when henry ii gets the news that henry the young king is really, really dead now, he is meant to have said the absolute soul-crusher of a quote that made me want to tell you this whole saga in the first place: "He cost me much, but I wish he had lived to cost me more."
like??? this kid tried to overthrow his dad. TWICE. he spent all the money his dad gave him and then some, which led to the aforementioned pillaging monasteries, he signed up to go on crusade that his dad specifically told him not to fucking go on (which he died before he could fulfil)... he did EVERYTHING wrong. like. so much.
and his dad just wants his pillaging, disobedient and wasteful son back.
and that is the story of henry the young king, the only junior king england ever had.
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samatok-i · 5 years ago
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sooooo this is my first request here so I spent 737484647 hours thinking on what would be a good start but I think I'll settle for something simple,, may I request first date headcannons for the boyes?
I APOLOGIZE FOR THE WAIT TUMBLR RLLY LET ME HAVE IT!!! blease accept these qwq (im breaking them up by division so the post wont be so cluttered :0)
💫 Allstars on a First Date Pt. 1��
♡Buster Bros♡ :
Ichiro: 
-He wants to take you to the movies! He’s not picky at all about what you guys go to see because he’s the kinda guy to enjoy the experience no matter what kinda movie it was! He’d love to talk about it afterwards with you if the movie was trash or if it was really good! (when he saw Into the Spider-verse with his bros he raved about it for days) 
-(his fav spidey person is Peni cuz he’s a slut for mecha anime)
-If you wanted to pick the movie that’d be totally fine with him! (unless theres a new movie adaption of an anime he wants to see- he’d agree with your choice but you can see the Longing in his eyes as he walks past the poster and you just might hafta give in lmao)
-Definitely pays for your snacks and drinks even if you protest because he’s a huge sweetheart (need me a MANS)
-He’s no scrub either he goes for the large drink, the large popcorn. AND king size m&ms??? Do you even deserve him????? No baby I’ll hold the food tray you’ve done enough 😤
-He finds y’all good seats and takes the tray so you can get comfortable before doing so himself and immediately going to demolish the popcorn before the previews end because he’ll always be a rebel at heart
-During the movie he (subtly but not Really) shifts closer to you and occasionally leans over or puts his hand on your shoulder lightly to whisper a joke or a thought he has about the movie in your ear (stay calm Reader-chan)
-You sorta spend the rest of the movie whispering jokes and making witty comments and giggling to yourselves like adult children and Ichiro thinks your laugh when your trying not to laugh is cute
-If something funny happens during the movie he’ll laugh loudly, if something sad happens you’ll hear him sniffling into his jacket sleeve and if something scary happens he’d keep that to himself but the way the his voice wavers when he asks if you’re okay kind of gives him away (he will Jump at the opportunity to hold your hand if you ask)
-He asks to stay after the credits because he cannot miss any after credits scenes its not in his blood, that’s not the kinda man he is
-After the movie is officially over he beats you to throwing away the trash and putting the tray back
-Would also immediately fire off about what stuck out to him in the movie and what he thought it lacked and ask your thoughts about it with a glimmer in his eyes
-He set a curfew for himself that he told his brothers he’d be back by but you both have a few more hours to kill so he asks if you wanted to grab dinner somewhere
-The place he takes you too isn’t fancy or high class, it’s just a nice, warm family diner he takes Jiro and Saburo to sometimes- he promises you’ll like it! (the place is also very special to him yknow)
-”If you don’t like it you never hafta go out with me again!” he joked but when you told him in all seriousness that you wouldn’t do that to him, some sort of tension fell away from his demeanor and he laughed warmly (relieved even) and said how that was real sweet of you
-Ichiro makes good conversation over dinner- he treats you like that he would an old friend or someone close to him and makes sure you stay engaged in the conversation just as much as he is
-After dinner (he pays of course- he was quick to whip out his wallet) you both make your way outside of the restaurant and you notice how he starts to fidget by rubbing the back of his neck and shifting his weight from each leg
-He asks if you had a good time and when you tell him you did (you Better) he visibly lights up, all traces of nervousness leaving him and his smile is big and its adorable
-(If you tell him that he wouldn’t know what to do other than stutter out a shocked thank you as his cheeks color)
-He says maybe you guys could go out again sometime? If you want? It’s totally chill if you don’t tho.
-When you say yes you didn’t think his smile could get any brighter and you realize how nice it makes you feel. How fuzzy.
-”Okay cool! That’s awesome! I’ll talk to you later alright? Be careful on your way home!”
-When you respond he starts fidgeting again like he wants to say something else and when you’re about to ask him what was up he quickly pecks your cheek before you could even register how close he had gotten. If his face wasn’t red before it definitely is now
-”I’ll call you okay? G’night!” he waves as he’s leaving and his big smile never leaves his face
Jiro:
-It’s arcade time! That would definitely be his first choice on where to take you
-Ichiro insists Jiro bring you over before y’all leave and although Jiro would love for his Niichan to meet you he can’t say the same for that little rugrat he’s forced to share a home with
-Of course he brings you anyway because Ichiro really wanted to meet you and Jiro can’t just say no to his older brother like that (Ichiro made Saburo promise to behave and he did so while wrinkling his nose and shooting Jiro a look behind Ichiro’s back and Jiro shot him a smug look in kind- Ichiro caught that one though and flicked his ear)
-When you reach the front door of the Yamada residence the door swings open before you could even knock
-Ichiro greets you warmly and eagerly ushers you inside telling you how much he’s wanted to meet you because “Jiro talks about you a whole lot yknow!” (Jiro makes a strangled noise of betrayal and his face goes red)
-You get an excited introduction from Ichiro and a less excited more being polite out of obligation introduction from Saburo (who’s about to make a quip at how Jiro even got someone to go on a date with to which Ichiro pushes Jiro towards you and says how you both ought to be going- “Also don’t forget about curfew got it? Have fun!”)
-When y’all make it to the arcade and get your game cards (they’re still tokens in my Heart) Jiro asks what game you wanna hit first and then y’all just sorta take turns dragging each other around
-His personal favorite games are 1v1 fighting games, racing games and dancing games- he loves the competition they bring and if you challenge him it’ll totally pump him up “You’re gonna regret it when I kick your ass!” 
-You guys go around the arcade with a new fighting spirit and try to kick each other asses at almost every game. Basketball, air hockey, hell even wack-a-mole- theres no holding back on any of them
-After you guys’ 3 round long dance battle you announce that you need a Break and he agrees (his jock ass could go for a few more rounds but he don’t wanna leave you out)
-He buys you a drink of your choice because he was informed that that was the Manly thing to do (”gentlemanly” was the word used but technicalities, technicalities) and asked if you’re down to get some food 
-Y’all both go for pizza (unless dear Reader is lack toes of taller ants then he wouldn’t mind letting you pick)
-You guys just share a big platter because Jiro’s funds are limited but he’d still like to treat you
-You guys laugh more often than you chew and take silly videos of each other eating to post on social media until you both decide that it was time to make more rounds around the arcade
-When it’s time to exchange game points for prizes Jiro loses his impulse control (read: non-existent) and picks out a bunch of dumbass shit
-”Bro I’ve wanted a kazoo for so fuckin’ long it ain’t even funny”
-If you want something a little higher on the points list but don’t have enough for he’d put back some of his shit (goodbye Creeper plushie) and say y’all could try combining points
-When its about time to leave Jiro clumsily says that he could walk you home- if you want! It comes out rougher than he intended and he can feel his face heating up but he’s determined to hold eye contact with you until you give him an answer
-He walks home with you until you both reach the front door of your place (also like how he was informed) and says he had a real good time and that y’all should definitely go again…y’know if you want…or whatever…
-You tell him you do and his face is Priceless (shock turning into something more like joy until he schools his features to look less like an excited puppy)
-Now unsure of how to end the conversation without being awkward he settles for the Bro Clap on your shoulder (totally not awkwa r d) and promises to get at you later 
-”I’ll dm you later ok? See ya!” he turns leaving you with a cool wave over his shoulder but he has the biggest grin on his face
Saburo:
-Oh god Saburo’s first date
-It’s his first date
-”Baby’s first date haha” “Shut up, maggot”
-He’s so nervous please help him
-He doesn’t have a clue how he was able to invite you out for the weekend let alone get away with calling it a date
-He’d be stroking his big fat ego if he didn’t feel like he was going to collapse- but he’ll be fine he has to be
-After all it’s just the aquarium! He actually likes the aquarium unlike the idiotic suggestions The Lesser One gave him (he would never go to the mall by choice). But he found the specimens kept at the aquarium to be interesting.
-Also Ichiro said he’d “chaperone” as his support (which Saburo would have never asked his Ichinii to do so in any other situation but…it’s a date. This is not his area of expertise. No matter how much research he had done on what to do and what not to do his anxiety never went away.)
-The plan was to meet the Yamada brothers at the aquarium and sure enough you couldn’t miss the two freakishly tall boys (one waving with both hands and the other meekly raising one hand in greeting)
-Ichiro took the lead, introducing himself on the way in and thanking you for taking care of Saburo (Saburo’s cheeks may have tinged a light pink at that)
-After making your way in Ichiro said he’d get out of y’alls hair and to text him if you needed anything
-Then you were both alone
-Saburo squashes the feeling of unease settling in his stomach and whips out a map of the building, asking if there was an exhibit you’d like to see first and then set off when you’ve made your pick
-At the exhibit he finds himself wanting to tell you what he knows about this particular species but he doesn’t want to annoy you or seem like he’s bragging about his knowledge (thats what kids at school usually assume- and although he Is known to brag he also like to share facts for fun)
-He starts slowly, “You know these animals are actually very interesting..”
-When you turn away from the exhibit to look at him and prompt him to speak more he’s actually startled and stutters a bit before continuing 
-You tell him that what he said was interesting and these animals were cooler than you thought!
-Oh. Oh.
-Saburo’s face feels warm as he opens the map again
-You guys laugh at the otters, marvel at the jellyfish and pet the little stingrays (Saburo was honestly a little reluctant at first but you coax him into it easily and the smile he wears when he touched one is a sweet little thing)
-He was becoming more eager to share his random information with you and you were just as entertained to listen
-He also laughs with you if you point out something funny the animals are doing
-”Hehe T-Pose crab.” “T-Pose cr a b” (these r what kids b talkin about dont @ me)
-He found himself loosening up around you qwq
-You guys eventually reach the gift shop and Saburo’s immediately drawn to these little sting ray plushies (they remind him of Mantyke from pokemon hehe) and he really wants one but…should he? In front of you?
-You catch him staring at them and then get a crazy idea: you both get one
-His cheeks flush immediately and before he can protest with something stupid you pick one up and give it to him while taking one for yourself. 
-Saburo was so caught off guard that he almost forgot to offer to pay (its Gentlemanly, Jiro, not Manly you fucking imbecile-)
-(Regardless MC BB taught them well)
-After you both snap a pic of your matching pokemon plushies, Saburo texts Ichiro asking if he could take you guys to McDonalds and Ichiro is fucking on it bro
-You all leave to get some McNuggies and make fun of the new Lion King toys because that shit is nasty (i know Hypmic is set in the near future but have you considered: i do what i please)
-It’s sundown by the time you all finish eating so Ichiro insists they accompany you home
-When you all reach your place Ichiro fakes a phone call and leaves you kids to be anxious alone
-Saburo says he hopes you had a good time and that if you’re ever free on the weekend again maybe you could hang out? If you’d like to…. (Ichiro fist pumps from behind the corner)
-You tell him of course you would and his cheeks grow warm again and he stutters out an “O-Okay!” and that he’ll keep in touch and he smiles and you smile and its cute bro
-He leaves you with a “I’ll see you at school” and a small wave
-He tries to keep his face neutral when Ichiro asks him how it went (and that his Mantyke plush is cute) but he fails horribly, a slow smile creeping onto his features
WOO finally finished these for a second time! i still had a lotta fun writing them though!! the rest of the divisions will be up shortly ;3c thanks for requesting!! 💖💗💕
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