#I actually made cookies irl too

[unorganisedalienrubbish]

Continuation from this post: 

[ooc] if anyone (anons included) has any squicks or issues with pronouns, or anything at all really, feel free to message me, or send an anon ask and I’ll change the post. Alternatively, feel free to add on! (Time is a lukewarm soup, go nuts)

*walks down stairs* Alrighty everyone, what’s going o-...

What the fuck happened here?! I thought this was just a checkup! *sighs while snapping on gloves* Well, this is going to be a LONG day.

Okay, everyone, there’s a lot of you meaning it will take a while but I WILL get around to you, you’re just going to have to wait your turn. Highest priority comes first, and that means little @rock-anon here is our winner. *speaking to all of you while I lift Rock onto a table* I am not your boss, but won’t take any shit from any of you *stares at @itsmeblackcat and @straight-to-the-pain * IF there’s any trouble I will call @nsfwhump-queen and I don’t think he’ll be too happy about it. Got it? Good.

--- 🪨 ---

Hey buddy, didn’t think I’d see you so soon. Just gonna lay you on your stomach there, okay? You want something to bite down on, or...? Okay, I’m going to clean off all this blood so I can see what I’m doing now, ‘right, it’s going to sting, but you were so good last time. *I wipe down Rock’s back with gauze, then with iodine swabs*

There we go, now we can see what's going on. Yikes, they cut you up pretty bad, didn’t they bud? It’s all good, nothing we can’t fix *ruffles hair* (phew *scans over to the other 9 people in the dingy basement* the lot of you need a good bath, but that’s for another day I guess)

*pulling out my suture kit, I tenderly sew up Rock’s back. He’s doing so well, not squirming at all, we can work around the twitches here and there.* Alright! great job buddy, the hard part’s done now. I’ll just put some ointment and a dressing on... can you sit up now? There, you can use my arm as support, well done! It’s not going to feel so great, but I need you to take some deep breaths in and out for me, just like we did before, *I put my ear on their chest, listening for any fluid or irregular breathing* Alright, you’ve got some crackles in there, but sounds good for now, bruising isn’t too bad (I would ice it, but your fingers are so cold already). Okay, can you lift your arms out to the side for me please, so I can wrap your ribs for you? Good job Rock, almost there! Let me just take a look at your splint, good that’s healing nicely, can you give your fingers a wiggle there for me? Nice, I’ll take the bandages off of those for you so you’ve got a little more movement. Wrist splint’s back on for the moment, so you’ve got some stability there.

There we go, all done! So brave for me again, such a good example for the rest of them! *wraps a thick blanket around Rock’s shoulders, gives them a gentle pat on the shoulder* You can stay up here if you like, or you can go sit in your spot on the floor, I won’t need the table for anyone else just yet. I’ll get some food sorted for you later, alright? Let me know if you still feel dizzy after you’ve eaten, and I’ll get you hooked up to an IV. Okay?

------

*changes out of the blood slicked gloves into a pair of clean ones, clapping my hands together* Alright then! You’ve all just seen how well Rock here behaved, I hope that’s enough incentive to do the same. However, I did bake a fresh batch of cookies this morning, and whoever is good, gets one, okay! So no biting (🐈‍⬛) no thrashing about, and I’ll make sure you get a cookie after we’re all done. Capisce?

*glares at S’s unconscious body* (I’ll get to you later)

--- 🌬---

Okay, 🌬-anon you’re up! I’m going to have to take off your blanket for now, alright? You can get it back after we’re done. First things first, let’s get that shoulder back in its place, can you lie down for me please? This is not going to feel great until it’s back in its socket, so you’re gonna have to bear with me for a minute, okay? I need you to take a really big breath, and on the count of three I need you to sigh it all out, alright? Okay, here we go

*placing my boot in the crook of 🌬-anon’s armpit and grabbing their wrist so their arm’s at a 45 degree angle* Okay, breathe in, one, two, three! * I pull on their arm so that it unhooks from the outside of its socket and gently release the tension until it pops back into the right spot* Awesome job there buddy! Phew! Bet that feels better now, huh? Everything should move alright now, but I don’t want you to move it at all ‘cause it might slip back out again (and I don’t want to be back here any more than I need to, you hear me?!) * I wrap 🌬-anon’s arm in a sling, bound close to their body*

‘Kay dude, I’m gonna need you sitting on that table so I can check out your face, please. (Hey Rock, can you shuffle over, they just need to sit up next to you. Play nice) *sitting on one of those wheely dentist stools, I wipe the blood and grime from 🌬-anon’s face, avoiding pressing on the swollen bruises* Alright buddy, hold still for a bit, I’m just gonna butterfly stitch your eyebrow back together (no needles, just tape), and chuck some ointment on. Good job! Can you give me a big smile, pretty please? Need to check if all those pearly whites are still there. *I shine a pocket torch in to examine the inside of their mouth* Your teeth are all good, but you’ve bitten your cheek; Nothing I can do about that I’m afraid, except give you an ice cube to suck? 

That about does it for you 🌬-anon, you can go sit back down in your spot in you want, or you can stay here with @rock-anon. Here’s your blanket back *I wrap the soft blanket around 🌬-anon and pass them an ice pack for their face* you’re gonna want to hold that on your bruise until the swelling goes down alright, you can take breaks if your face or your fingers go numb. And you can check the swelling (and my work) in your mirror, if you want. Just try not to move your shoulder.

---🐈‍⬛---

*I walk over to 🐈‍⬛-anon, standing well out of reach (and kicking distance)* How we hanging buddy? I’m going to take this slowly for you, so you can understand me, okay? I am ~not~ going to hurt you. I am here to help. *crouching down so I can make eye contact* Look at me, I am going to let you down, alright. If you cause any trouble, I’ll put you right back, you hear me? Okay? Alright.

*unchaining 🐈‍⬛-anon from the wall, catching them before they crash to the floor in a heap. I set them down, leaning against the wall* Sorry, collar stays on buddy, boss’s rules. I’m trusting you now, no biting, no funny business.

*I tentatively place my ear against their chest to hear slow, laboured breathing (‘least they’re breathing at all, that was a hefty dosage)* Okay, I’m going to lift the back of your shirt up to check for burns, nice and easy now. * pulling 🐈‍⬛-anon so their body slumps drunkenly against my shoulder, I slowly and gently lift the back of their shirt to find two round burns where the stun gun zapped ‘em* Putting some ointment on now, almost done now. 

*after pulling their shirt back down and setting them back against the wall, I sit back on my haunches, still making eye contact with 🐈‍⬛-anon, making sure they’re still hearing me* Your shoulders are still in their sockets, so I don’t need to treat those. I would give some medicine for the swelling, but it would mess with whatever you’ve got going on now, so the best I can do is some ice, alright? I can’t hold it for you, so I’ll just leave the bag here and you can put it on when you’re up to it. You did a good job, I’ll help you get some food in you after I’ve taken a look at the others okay? 

--- 🦝---

Okie-dokie, that’s the worst of them done. 🦝-anon, love, you can sit up now. Come over here and I’ll patch you up a bit. I’ve got a special job for you later and I want you nice and not-sore for that, alright? You did a good job buddy, staying so still for the boss-man, yeah? I’m just gonna put some dressings on your knees now. *I sit with 🦝-anon’s legs in my lap as I carefully pick the grit out of their knees with tweezers, before putting some antiseptic and plasters on* Nice job there, I hated having that done when I was a kid, you sat so still! Can I see your hands please? Those chains aren’t treating you too nicely, but they’ve gotta stay on I’m afraid. I’ll treat everyone’s sores once I’ve fixed you all something to eat. *I rub some ointment on 🦝-anon’s palms, then stand to walk over to @straight-to-the-pain * I’ll give you your big job once I’ve sorted out this fucker, alright? Sit tight for a minute yeah? Here’s a blanket for behaving so well.

--- S ---

*keeping an eye on 🐈‍⬛-anon (and always in my peripheral) I march over to S’s unconscious body. I know there’s no use talking to him, but I do it anyway, mostly out of habit* Hey! S! Asshole! *a wave my hand in front of their face, unsurprisingly, with no response. Squeezing his shoulders, I shout his name again. Still no response. Christ @nsfwhump-queen can really throw a kick. They’ll be out for a while. I grab S’s jaw, check with the torch to check for obstructions in the throat, then tilt his head up so the airway is straight* 

Hey  🌬-anon, love, can I borrow your mirror please? Just for a second, I need to check if he’s breathing. *collecting the small mirror, I angle it against S’s mouth, a small puff of condensation clouds the mirror. Thank goodness, I did not want to have to deal with that. I carefully pass the mirror back to  🌬-anon* Thanks, precious.

*Rolling S into the recovery position, I lock a cuff around their extended arm and secure it to the closest hook on the wall. (I can check for broken ribs when they wake) Even if he wakes up while I’m away, he won’t be able to do any more damage.*

------

*Peeling off the soiled gloves and chucking them back into my now near-empty med-bag, I turn to the group of now mostly patched anons.* Okay everyone, listen up. Thank you for all waiting so patiently, if I haven’t seen you yet, I will after I go upstairs to fix some hot food for all of you. How does that sound? I trust you all to behave while I’m gone, you were all so good so far, don’t let me down now, okay. 🦝-anon here’s your big job, okay you can move about, right, you’re allowed to? Okay, good, now so while I’m upstairs you’re going to keep an eye on 🐈‍⬛-anon and S for me okay. I don’t want you going near them, or touching them, or picking fights now. Just, if they start to wake up, or 🐈‍⬛-anon starts making noise, I want you to wait at the top of the stairs and call my name okay. And I’ll come down and sort things out myself, alright. Got that? Good job *ruffles hair* Okay everyone, play nice.

[ooc] part 2 soon! Feel free to respond or whatever and yeah! I had tremendous fun!

[undyinglantern]

when you’re so shit at Spanish that it literally doesn’t even occur to you how to pronounce this word until looking at the wiki 👍🏼

[burningcheese-merchant]

Sooo, I have a thought from an ask i saw about yandere beasts towards the ancients...

What if the Beasts became yandere towards YOU instead?

Although, the Ancients have the same feeling too, which may lead to high tensions in the air.

What would YOU in that scenario?

-A Self-Aware/Yandere lover Anon

Wait, me? Me specifically? Merchant? The person answering this ask? That's certainly an interesting thought...

If the Beasts became yanderes towards me, then I would fucking panic lol. I don't condone this kind of behavior irl, it's fun to write fictional crazy people but nobody wants to endure ACTUAL crazy people. Stalkers are sick and dangerous and need to be put away, and it's a damn shame it's not taken seriously by law enforcement anywhere (not until it escalates to violence, anyway, unfortunately)

With that said, let's terrorize Merchant for a little bit

IF THE BEASTS ARE STILL JUST COOKIES:

Step on them immediately, they're like 3 inches tall wait, would that work? They have powers and are crazy strong. What can they actually do against humans? Would stepping on them just break my fucking foot?

Send my dog after them no wait, I don't want them to hurt my dog. I love my dog very much. I don't know what I'd do if something happened to him. I'd never forgive myself if I let him try to eat them and he just got turned into flour or something

Pour milk on them ONE OF THEM IS MADE OF MILK ALREADY GODDAMN IT

Hide the box of cookies I like to get from the store, because they probably wouldn't appreciate the fact that I love to eat cookies (they're just like this 🍪 but still)

Try to trap them in the fridge momentarily, hope they don't destroy my nice fridge

Make a deal where they are allowed to live in and explore my house provided they damage nothing and hurt no one

Give them head scratches (especially Spice, his head looks Very Scratchable)

Give them tiny little kisses if they behave themselves (however, if I give one a kiss, I have to give them ALL kisses, or else the other 4 will retaliate against me out of jealousy)

I will also allow them to sit on my shoulders if they behave themselves and don't try to yank on my hair or my ears or something

Wait, do cookies know what sex is? Are they capable of sexual feelings? If so, how do they deal with them? Do they have the... equipment for that? WHAT IF THEY TRY TO HUMP MY FINGERS OR SOMETHING OH GOD-

Contact federal authorities and hope that they believe me when I say superpowered talking cookies are in my house, so they can come take them away and perhaps experiment on them

Probably never sleep again because there's a batch of little satanic cookies in my house that all want to fuck me for some reason (I'm ugly and a normie, wtf did I do to deserve this 💀)

IF THE BEASTS ARE HUMAN:

immediate death

panic x10000000000

I hc Spice as being at least 6'5''/198cm and 200+/90+ lbs/kg so I'm cooked 7 ways to Sunday just with him

Seriously I'm just a short nerd irl. Assuming they still have their powers, my life is literally over

Do everything in my power to convince them all my loved ones are dead so they don't go harm them out of jealousy (ESPECIALLY my SO, God have mercy, I'll probably have to tell him to go hide in his home country for a while)

Try to barricade myself in a church, hope that the "demons cannot set foot on hallowed ground/in God's house" rule applies to them, beg God to save my sorry ass while they try to break in and drag me back out

Can't call the cops because A) stalking and harassment are not taken seriously by police, B) they won't believe me when I say that 5 supervillains are trying to kidnap and marry me, C) by the time they realize I'm telling the truth, they will already have been hanged/put into a coma/beheaded/turned to flour/cut up into salt cubes

I actually only like men irl so I am in deep trouble with Flour and Sugar especially

Try to flee the country (probably won't work but I'll try anyway and hope they don't get too mad about it), hide out in the Yukon or some bumfuck nowhere village in Russia, I'd rather face a polar bear than these guys

Probably still be forced to let them live in my house in exchange for peace and obedience

...I don't know if tiny head scratches and kisses would cover it this time

Hope that they're all possessive enough to only harass me one at a time, instead of... more than one at a time, because that counts as sharing and yanderes don't really like doing that

Try to pit them against each other constantly. If they're too focused on arguing about who I belong to or whatever, then they can't focus on tormenting me

Would like to try to stab or shoot them but idk if conventional weaponry works on them at all

If I HAD TO pick one to say yes to, it would be Burning Spice. He is sexy af. Then, hopefully, I can weaponize this and get him to defend me from the others

IF THE ANCIENTS LIKED ME TOO, BUT WERE NORMAL:

Yay, sanity. I'll tell them to PLEASE get the Beasts away from me. They can sort out whatever they feel towards me later, we've got a bigger problem on our hands than that

COOKIES: I will keep them safe in my house under the same conditions as the Beasts: behave and do not harm anyone or anything

HUMANS: Look, can I just... send them back? How did any of these guys get here, anyway? Can I please just shove them back through the portal or whatever they used to get here? Even if I wasn't taken, I don't think I'd have the strength or patience to put up with anyone's shit. Can we just be friends? I'd love to be friends. I need a mom friend like Hollyberry in my life

If necessary, I am picking Dark Cacao. Seriously, I love my big, strong men. Merchant is a basic bitch at heart lol

IF THE ANCIENTS WERE YANDERES TOO:

Are you fucking kidding me

Am still picking Cacao, fuck all of you

[sing-me-under]

Thinking about a fic idea from Dick’s POV about Jason taking his place at Bruce’s side except this is completely based on my own amalgamation of canon.

1.

It starts when Dick returns to Gotham post-Deathstroke hoping for some comfort and safety away from heroism for a bit and childhood familiarity with Bruce only to find out that not only did Batman have absolutely no clue Robin was kidnapped and assumed dead, Bruce had even taken in another kid with black hair and blue eyes. He’s only had Jason for like two months apparently, and they’re already making plans for adoption.

Probably the worst part about this whole thing is that Bruce didn’t even think about Dick, the kid he’d had for almost nine years at this point, at all. (Dick doesn’t acknowledge Bruce’s all-consuming fear for Dick’s safety in the entire almost nine years they known each other. He doesn’t think about how Bruce’s overbearing, over controlling tendencies was Bruce caring too much. It must have eaten at him, not knowing how Dick was. Jason will remember Bruce’s ever present concern for the Golden Child.)

Dick can’t bring himself to resent either of them. He was the one who destroyed all of Batman’s surveillance, yelled at Bruce for trying to keep an eye on him, then didn’t even check in to let Bruce know he was anything other than dead or alive. Of course Bruce wouldn’t know anything that wasn’t always public knowledge. The kid also idolizes Robin, and Dick wouldn’t begrudge a kid out of a safe and loving home just because it was his first.

Dick doesn’t even try. He just goes straight to Alfred then leaves later that evening with a tin of cookies for the Teen Titans.

2.

Some months later, Dick sees a Gotham Gazette article about “Robin spotted in Gotham!” with a super blurry smear of yellow, red, and green chasing after another blurry smear that kind of looks like Batman. Dick storms back to Wayne Manor, intending to bury the fuck out of Batman for letting his shiny new son use his name, only to find out that no, actually, the truth is a little more complicated than just that. Apparently, Batman got injured or whatever, and while he was on bed rest, some knock-off Batman was running around Gotham. Jason more or less grabbed a shitty Robin Halloween costume from some costume store (because of course there would be shitty Halloween costumes of irl heroes) and chased down the fake Batman. (I am so obsessed with pre-crisis Nocturna but I’ll hold myself back here)

Afterwards, Bruce begrudgingly agreed to accept Jason as a vigilante since this was like the third time Jason had stopped a crime all on his own (the first time being Ma Gunn’s crime school) and Bruce would really prefer Jason do crime fighting from the safety of Batman’s cape. By the time Dick saw the article and made his way to Gotham, Jason was still trying to design his own vigilante uniform and come up with names (his ideas are terrible). Dick is honestly so tired of being angry that he just sighs and goes “you know what, I want to cut all ties with Batman. It’s not like he wants anything to do with me either. Jason, do you want to be Robin?”

Dick becomes Nightwing, a kryptonian legend. Aside from the OG Titans and some of the founding JL members, Nightwing has no connections to Gotham and especially not to Robin.

Sometimes, Dick Grayson visits Alfred and goes back to Titans Tower with a bag of homemade food. Sometimes, he brings some soulless souvenir as a late/early birthday/holiday present for Jason. He avoids Bruce each time.

3.

When Jason died, Dick was on a mission in space. He missed the funeral by a whole month. When he found out, he and Bruce scream at each other about shit knows what. Something about how he deserves to know when a kid dies in his suit with his name. Something about how Dick didn’t even care about Jason. Something about how it all was Bruce’s fault. Neither of them remember the words exchanged, but it ended with Bruce slapping Dick and the menacing silence that followed.

4.

Things don’t get better. Tim appears, pulling Dick back to Gotham and saying “Batman needs Robin. He’s going to get himself killed.” Apathy buries the feeling of grieving a still living not-dad. He’s already crossed the stage of acceptance. Batman can die for all he cares. It’s not his job (not his place) to help Bruce.

Nightwing still gets roped into saving Batman from Two-Face. Tim still steals the Robin uniform and saves them both.

Batman looks at Tim. He’s done this song and dance before. He doesn’t even try to stop Tim and just goes “fine.” Nightwing thinks “I won’t let this one down. I’ll be a good brother, mentor, predecessor to this one. I’ll deserve to go to this one’s funeral.”

Bruce attempts to reach out one more time. Dick finds himself living closer to Gotham than he has in a long time. Undercover work makes his skin crawl — the blood on his hands never seems to wash off — but weeding out the Bludhaven Police Department feels almost like a vacation where he can pretend to be Dick Grayson, normal member of society, instead of Nightwing/Robin. (It’s the closest Bruce gets to being reassured of Dick’s safety.)

5.

Life goes by. Dick and Bruce fight again and again. Batman and Nightwing fight side by side and back to back. Bruce and Dick stitch each other up in the Batcave and let bygones be bygones.

The Red Hood appears. Dick never really knew Jason all that well. He wonders if Bruce ever thought his dearly departed son was capable of committing such atrocities. Barbara says Jason had a darkness in him even before. She refused to elaborate further.

Bludhaven gets nuked. Jason disappears.

Dick returns to Gotham, to Wayne Manor. While he heals, Bruce sits at his bedside and Tim and Cass cuddle up against him. They’re just a pile of bats and birds basking in each other’s presence and the steady heartbeats that prove they’re alive.

Dick realizes that he hasn’t heard Bruce laugh in a long, long time.

6.

Their life is hard. Things happen. Death happens. Life happens.

They’re all still alive. Somehow. Despite all attempts otherwise. Life has settled, kindly. Things aren’t getting worse. Sometimes, Dick thinks it might be getting better.

Dick sits with Jason at the kitchen table. They’re technically not supposed to bring mask stuff into the manor, but Dick is too immersed in this case to set it down while he makes a sandwich at 2AM. Jason is eating straight from the pickle jar. Dick know for a fact that Jason is only doing that because Dick can see him and he’s just being an asshole. Jokes on him. Dick is just happy Jason is alive and comfortable enough to be an asshole in stately Wayne Manor’s kitchen.

Dick doesn’t know what compels him, but completely unprompted, he says it anyway.

“I used to hate you.”

Jason doesn’t even falter. He just glances up, bites through his pickle, and deadpans,

“No shit.”

Dick can’t help but grin. “Yeah? I thought I was hiding it pretty well.”

Jason raises an eyebrow. “For my 13th birthday, you gave me a keychain from some NYC gift shop that spelled ‘J-a-c-e-n’.”

[marianchurchland]

I was tagged by @deedala (shoutout to the old BSN) for birthday themed questions <3

And since there's some overlapping relevance, here's my birthday want list from a few months ago, which just happens to contain a little bit of DA fanart (all my dragon age wishes were indeed granted, thank you very kindly).

When is yours? June 15th

Where were you born? Vancouver, Canada

How do you feel about your legal name? Are you using it online and/or IRL? I’m fine with my name – and I definitely use it online. I don't think it's ideal, but I’ve never come up with a handle that I like enough to stick with.

How about your sign? Do you feel it "fits"? No, although my main associations come from people in high school reading me my horoscope out of Seventeen magazine, and it being something along the lines of, “girl, you’ve got the gift of the gab! You’re the life of every party!” Thank you, Seventeen, but wrong on all counts.

What's your earliest memory related to your birthday? My parents hosted a birthday party for me when I was maybe four or five years old, and as soon as the cake emerged and everyone started singing “Happy Birthday”, I buried my head under my arms and refused to come out. And when you think about it, having a bunch of people all staring at you and smiling and singing your name in unison IS, actually, very strange and uncomfortable...

What's one of the best gifts you've ever received? Every shiny that anyone has ever sent or given to me!

How about one of the best you've given yourself? I think that an excellent gift blueprint involves choosing a book that you like (and which you think the receiver might also like), and then collecting a few treats that might pair well with it and turning it all into a small care package. Example selection: your favourite fantasy book plus a box/batch of cookies plus a package of nice tea or coffee plus a stubby beeswax candle plus a random treasure object (nice stone or little animal figurine or dried flower, etc.) And in case I misinterpreted the question, I think it also works well as a gift to yourself. (I made a Patreon post that expanded on this a while back, so I'll link it here, too.)

What's your favourite cake flavour? Dark fruit cake! 2kg of raisins drowned and left to rot in sin.

How about your favourite flowers? All the common weedy wildflowers in my area, like yarrow and foxgloves. I also I stop to smell every rose I see. Personal best practice.

Have your ever thrown a birthday party? If yes, tell us about your favourite one. No, and I pity anyone whose birthday pleasures rely on my party-throwing skills.

What's the ultimate birthday song? I’ll say “Come Undone” by Duran Duran, because “happy birthday to you” is in the opening few lines (and also because I love this song). Beyond that, I’m drawing a blank.

And last but not least, pick a celebrity with whom you share your birthday. Ice Cube!

I'm scared to tag anybody I don't know well, so with zero pressure: @klovharun and @unstablemable, who can at least tell me no in person.

[the-fandom-queenxox]

Blaming @sincerely-nines for letting the demons out

Here is the minecraft food update ideas that have been plaguing me fo a very long time:

(Also I know most of what I am about to list off are in many minecraft mods, you don't have to tell me about them, I just wanna yap about things)

(Also also I mainly talked about food we could have with the already existing edible minecraft items)

-First of all WHY DON'T WE HAVE APPLE PIE IN MINECRAFT!!! WE HAVE PUMPKIN PIE SURE BUT WE DESERVE APPLE PIE TOO!! Oh and also golden/enchanted golden apple pie... cause I think it would be funny and I want it

-Continuing the pie train sweet berry pie, glow berry pie, shepherd's pie(we have enough meat options to make it), chicken pot pie and also just learned about this one, fish pie

-Speaking of fish, sushi. "Oh bUt FAndOm yOU neEd riCe AnD SeAwEEd To mAKe sUsHI" no you don't, there are many recipes of sushi without rice in them and you can use the dried kelp as a substitute to seawed

-But also yeah they should add rice too

-Squids, we should be able to eat the squids... both of them(and yes you would get the glow effect if you ate the glow squid)

-Getting back on the pie train for a second for the actual last pie for the list(unless I forgot any that could be made via the limited items we have in minecraft), chorus fruit pie, cause it's funny to think about

-Carrot cake, chocolate cake or even better brownies, sweet berry cake and glow berry cake

-Sugar cookies

-Cheese!!! Which they made cheese in one of the april fools updates, so they infact can code this in, but I want it in a specific way, it is the height of a half slab and it is eaten like a cake... and maybe also cream, butter, yogurt or frosting even, since the one cake we do have seems to already have something like that on the sprite on it... also I think it would be funny if you crafted a whole stick of butter and eat it infront of your friends

-Speaking of "april fools updates" sweet potatoes and mashed potatoes

-Chocolate, just regular chocolate

-Add on from the last point hot chocolate

-French toast, we have all the ingredients for this why can't we have it?!

-Maybe some egg dishes? Like fried eggs, boiled eggs, scrambled eggs...

-Oh it just came to me, eggs benedict! Just replace the english muffin with regular bread, which probably make it count as a sandwich now that I think about it... they should also add sandwiches...

-Maybe also some more dishes with mushrooms? Even though I don't lkke mushrooms irl it's kinda weird to only have one food item with them in it

-I also wouldn't mind if they made more stews or soup

-Puddings! More specifically bread pudding and chocolate pudding

-Caramel

-A lot of trees are actually very safe to eat the bark and seeds of

-Sunflower seeds

-Also apparently if you boil it, you can eat bamboo as well and we have that in minecraft so we should eat it

-Many types of juices!! Some short examples would be carrot juice, melon juice, beetroot juice... etc.

-Kinda going off topic with this one, but I wanna gnaw on the bones we get from the skeletons, mojang let me eat the bones!!! You can make it so if you eat one it gives nausea cause it is actually unhealthy to eat bone as is and can make you seriously sick, but I wanna be a rabid fucking animal damn it and scare off the hoes. Side note here but you can also eat bonemeal and be okay to do so, so yeah that is also an option

Aaannd that's all of them for me, but if any of you have some ideas on what else to add do let me know, I probably missed alot of things

[lazarettobrat]

Remember Ciel in Wonderland? (u better dont)

March Hare and Jack of Hearts at your service

In canon, the Jack of Hearts stole cookies made by the Red Queen herself. And when he was caught and brought to trial, the March Hare was a witness in case.

I got a lobotomy and cerebellar liquefaction and did terrible things to the freaky Kuro OVA dont blame me.

Here (let's call it AU) William T. Spears aka the March Hare works in court as a prosecutor. The Hare was cursed, possibly by the White Queen or by someone he sent to prison (nevermind), so at certain times he completely loses his mind (like hares in March irl), one of his eyes turns white, and he becomes a danger to society. In his calm form he is canonically stern and emotionless. He was locked up, took to the doctor, but all the help he got was the doctor's advice (in Wonderland everyone is a little crazy, remember that) to start smoking weed to calm down. Of course he didnt believe this bullshit at all. In one of these incidents, he was randomly walking wherever his eyes looked and came across a clearing with a table set for a tea ceremony. Then he met the Dormouse (Ronald) and the Mad Hatter (Undertaker), where the latter casually mentioned that a light joint really could calm him down considerably.

Rebecca aka Jack of Hearts. She is unsociable and almost never attends royal events, cant stand the Queen, but at the same time serves her faithfully. If she goes out somewhere, she looks like a victim of a BDSM party cause has no sense of style, but the Queen likes it and approves thats why she considers Jack sa favorite among her inner circle. In Wonderland, Rebecca and Ron are not related, and she is literally called Jack Ofhearts, and no one understands joke is this or her real name. She met and became friends with the Hatter when he was still sane and is very sad that he has gone crazy, but rarely still comes to him for tea and brings something sweet. One day she was very late for his tea ceremony (the trope of being late is apparently something all-encompassing for them), so she blindly stole fresh cookies from the royal kitchen, and then it turned out that the queen had baked them herself. She came for tea after all, saw a Hare for the first time, treated everyone to cookies, and had a nice time with friends. And then it suddenly turned out that her new acquaintance whom she had a spark was actually a prosecutor and wanted to do his job properly, that is put the thief behind bars/off his head.

And since the Hare loses some of his memories from the roof flying off phase, he doesnt remember how they hung out at the table (or maybe under the table who knows...) and doesnt know that Jack stole the cookies, so he interrogates her and several other suspects with all the severity, simultaneously starting to go crazy with the new moon (or with some other sign, i didnt think about how often the fucking should occur)

There might be a sequel and some sketches, i liked the setting too much

[the-space-jesus]

♪ Basically rehearsal 1 ♪

(Context: I've been cast in rtc as Rickie and well...yeah, that's all the context you need.)

The first rehearsal was actually pretty diverse from the others. Currently, we have this fun little (not that little) theatre room that we practice in twice a week, but that time we were at Mischa's (the person that plays Mischa, I'm not going to use their IRL name and pronouns for obvious reasons) house, where I had watched Ride The Cyclone with Mischa, Constance and another friend a week or two ago (it was a potluck, super super fun!). I arrived a little later, and they were playing some silly card game and we all collectively ate our cheap-ass cookies. Then we did some warm up (literally took like an hour but it was really fun) which included physical warm up, voice warm up and some fun theatre games. Then we realized that there was no way in hell we could do the choreo or anything really in Mischa's tiny living room, so we went outside and almost got hit by traffic while walking in character and playing some obscure song, me and Karnak 1 (we have two Karnaks) were talking about our very normal teacher fanfiction. We made it to this park, and there was this little football field that was cement for some reason (the rest was grass and trees and stuff) and it was covered in these acorn-like things. We kicked away all the acorns (partially in character, we were all still trying to find our characters and stuff) and got to rehearsing! I honestly don't know how, but in like two hours minimum we only did a tiny part of fall fair (suite) and Karnak's opening scene. Oh and I forgot to mention, Jane wasn't there idk she just couldn't make it. Rehearsing went great, like I said all still struggling since we're kindof amateurs (most of us) and the Karnaks got to wear a communal shirt and watch us judgingly from a bench while Mischa is spinning us around and we're doing choreo! Speaking of judging, there were a lot of people (children, adults, people walking their dogs, etc.) who walked by and looked at us as if we were aliens. Fun stuff! I also don't have any crutches, so I was using a single tall stick as makeshift crutches. At some point we had this silly little break where we all sprinted to the little playground that was really close to the football field (and scared off the two children playing there) and just went on the swings (I love the swings) with Karnak 1 and 2, I also went on the seesaw (we looked really funny, literal teenagers in a playground. Very out of place.) and stuff. Then we did some more choreo for fall fair (we literally have only finished the choreo for that 3 rehearsals later..even if we're multitasking that's kind of a lot) and then we all went back to Mischa's house, played some Pictures Against Humanity (It's like Cards Against Humanity but you put down pics from your camera roll instead of cards, we thought of it at the potluck and it's become a bit of a tradition now!) and ate the Merci box that Noel gifted us, aswell as some lemonade (I put too much syrup in mine, idk how people do lemonade haha) and then we all went home.

Realization that I yap too much..

-Ricky Potts 🖖

[puffpastrycrimewatch]

Hello there!!

Does you or any of your ocs like sweets?

Because I'm giving away cookies because I got nothing better to do lol-

So yeh- Have a cookie🍪

(Btw, the cookies I made doesn't taste so good- I'm not good at cooking lol🥲)

Mmm not bad, here please take this banana bread I made recently (I actually did irl)

Phoebe's never had a cookie or any baked sweets but she thinks it's delicious!

Tudor can't really eat so he gave it to his dog demon but he wants to offer you a non alcoholic drink!

Um I don't even know if Katabasis can eat

Amelia is a bit busy but not too busy to eat sweets

Unfortunate for Leo

[wouldntyou-liketoknow]

Sentient Affronts to Nature (and Sanity Itself) Need Friends, Too...

Hey.

I've got some weird plans for Halloween. This year's Special is gonna be much more on the supernatural side than last year's.

Ya’ll remember Cruz Freitas? That LixianEgo I created as a gift for @sammys-magical-au ? The funky guy whose hobbies include violin-playing and a whole lotta occultism? The scrungly blorbo who’s working as something of an assistant to the horrifying EldritchPlier himself?

Yeah, well…looks like the vibes I gave him are contagious.

I’m officially going Full Manic and cranking out a few more fanegos for this WIP! I'll be posting a few of my standard info-pages soon, and they'll definitely be updated/reblogged as more ideas come along.

(As per usual, I got tons of help with brainstorming from Sammy. Thanks so much for all your patience, thoughts, and encouragement, bestie 💞💞💞)

Also, since I always feel the need to give some clarification:

When I first created Cruz, I gave him a bunch of things that you could expect to see in the average cult (even though he, Sol, and Moses aren’t actually part of a cult. That’s why I’m calling them all “semi-cultists”). 

And what are those things, you ask? A ceremonial tool/weapon, a supernatural pet, and a protective mask. (I talked about the specifics of Cruz’s stuff here, in case you’re curious. Plus, Cruz’s pet, an outer-creature-cat-thing named Macaroon, is based off of irl Lixian’s cat, Cookie.) 

(Plus, if you’d like to really get a feel for Cruz’s stuff, check out this fantastic artwork made by the lovely @inkbedou! Please go check out their other stuff, they’re such a gem! Fun fact: the red-and-gold pattern on Cruz’s mask was inspired by a real mask that my dad hand-painted one Halloween back when I was in middle-school!)

So, two of my upcoming fanegos are each gonna get their own things from those categories! While I want to have plenty of variety between these characters, I also want them to have a few things in common, y’know? Just to make certain scenes feel well-balanced for all of them.

Keep those eyes peeled... 😈😈😈

[cookieeevee]

Hello Yellow and Welcome People!!

Most people tend to call me Cookie or Cookieeevee because of my blog name, but call me Alice! I use the pronouns She/Her and They/Them (I don't mind which one you use)

I am Aroace and a Minor! ! !

I am into Rain World, OneShot, Pokemon, Warrior Cats, Kirby, Sonic, Pikmin, Ori, Chicory: a colorful tale, Steven universe, MHA, Epic Mickey, and many more

You can ask me anything, I'd love to chat with you all (Ask about ADH au or ask Lily if u want too)

Art requests are always welcomed :D

My designs of the slugcats and Iterators My Rain world OCs My other OCs

Side blogs of mine

ISAT AU: @three-multiverse-shooting-stars

Cookie: @ask-cookieeevee03

Madge: rainworld-starsandclouds023

Droplet (Old, should probably reboot at some point): rainworld-ask-the-medic

SOES: rainworld-lifeisendless230

Slugcat's: rainworld-cycle-of-slugcats

just doodle/art blog: mossy-doodles85

Silly adventurers of my plush's (feel free to send me art in Messages of the sillys if you want, I will post it and credit u, if u want :3)

you can draw for me if ya want

Amazing Friends Of Mine!: @rainworld-obsessed-cat-reborn (One of my first tumblr friends! Probably one of my closes friends here! They are really silly and has great art! I thought I'd never see them again once their main blog got deleted... I'm very glad they're back now. I care for them with the might of a 1000 suns and always wish for the best of them! I'll always have their back, no matter what <3) @stargazer0001 (A great friend, who I really care for! One of the first people I go to talk to about silly ideas and aus of mine. They're art is a joy to see and our silly chats we had before were really fun! Thanks for being there for me <3)

@southparkau00 (MY FIRST TUMBLR FRIEND! They helped me a lot when I was new to Tumblr, lots of love to them! They have been off for so long I thought they left, they didn't and I'm so glad.) @critter2 (Super silly bud that I met because of Star! Their art is amazing and its always a blast to be around them! Sadly they aren't on often so that kinda sucks... ALSO THEY ARE WHOLESOME WHEREVER THEY THINK/KNOW THAT OR NOT!!!!) @lanternlightsovercloudyskies (I've actually never checked if we're friends or not, but see her as one! Cute silly art that a joy to see, and shes super wholesome in my opinion! I always hope for the best for her!) @bananacat76 (My silly great friend! They're super cool and wholesome, all things I wish to be. They've let me add their RW persona, Banana cat, to my RW AU and even let me make Banana Cat Enot's sibling! Lots of hugs to them! A joy see and a gift to be around ^^) @rcranger (THIS SUPER AMAZING AND COOL PERSON IS MY FRIEND!!! Hes made super cute and silly art that is a joy to see and always puts a smile on my face! Cherry has been a super great person and he need MORE LOVE so go check him out and give him some love!!)

@puffstarss (I'm pretty sure we're friends, at least to me she is! Puffs is probably one of the most kind people here! She's a big UT and UTY fan and is the owner of The Undertale Yellow Runaway Route AU! If your a fan of UTY aus and stuff be sure you check out her blog! also I will die for them like all friends of mine)

Random things about me: My favorite colors are mint green and lavender I want to write but am too scared to put it online and I get writers block a lot... I wish people would ask me more things (on any of my blogs)... My IRL friend group and I do a lot of dark humour I draw all the time, in class, at lunch, at home, in the car, and many other places Cream is my favorite Sonic character I my 3rd favorite Sonic character is Chris from Sonic X, FIGHT ME ON IT I have four brothers and no sisters... I have many AUs which I will probably never tell anyone about because I am scared of doing that Rain world brain rot I REALLY want to play SA2 just because of the chao garden Undertale Yellow fan! I'VE DODGED DEATH!!!! If you want to be friends with me, just ask. Cuz I'm probably not gonna ask you that and I'm always happy to have more friends I need help

[c00kietin]

Silly, probably really amazing irl too! You are actually someone who I would like to get along with, if that means something :>

But honestly…I think you are pretty cool! Super cool even >:3

Keep it up, you super awsome and crazy cookie 😄

I just. have no words honestly this is so kind ;v;

I know I always say this with anons but I do hope I find out someday who this is because the ask made me smile so much <3333

[sweater-daddiesdumbdork]

🍫 - Send a compliment to one of your favorite creators from Navys All treats no tricks

Amber! You're such a strong person. I can't begin to tell you how happy I am for you to get a new kidney! I told my irl friends even how happy I am 🥰 while I love your Tika updates I must admit that I love your Curtis and Honey updates more 🤭 the way you write Curtis has set such high standards for partners for me 😅 also please give Tika some extra cuddles and kisses from me as thank you for taking such wonderful care of you 🥰

In addition to that I wanted to show my favorite writers how their works impact me and stay with me. So there's this kinda weird thing I do... I think about the layout of the characters living spaces a lot. (You actually know this because I showed you how I see Curtis house already) For the purpose of showing you how much I enjoy your work I drew how I see Honeys crappy apartment (that she should totally ditch and go move in with Curtis) 🥰

How did I not know about @navybrat817 all treats post? Tumblr not being nice, that's for sure.

This made my day and I was all blushy and my heart did the whole squeeze of utter affection. I thank you so much! The transplant has been such a journey and that support and encouragement has meant EVERYTHING to me. This was such a huge chapter in my life and sharing it with all of you was scary, but I'm so glad I did.

I'm giving Tika all the cuddles and love from you, she's happy to get all the extra cookies possible. So she thanks you too. 🥰

I'm always surprised (and idk why) whenever someone tells me how much they love Curtis and Honey, it really started out in a quest for me to live out my own happy fantasy and to give Curtis something he so rarely gets. It brings me endless joy to know that they live in other people's hearts too.

I know we discussed Curtis's home set up (I gotta find those messages again, your vision for his house was so good) and Honey's sad little apartment is making me have heart eyes cause Peter the Spiderplant has his own little place on the map!

Wanna see my own Peter Parker Spiderplant? (He gets three names cause three pups were planted in the pot 🤣)

[divorcetual]

Im worried that ive gone so long without irl friends that I dont know how to actually make them anymore. The last friends I made irl were in kindergarden and first grade, and I kept them until my sophmore year of hs. Ig I made others but we always fell out of contact within a few months. Im always too formal or too casual with them. I cant gauge how theyll teact until after I do and then its just. ugh. It feels like I have to put on a show its so fucking annoying.

I hate it. I did so well with my friends until last year. I kinda resent them for abandoning me. They got closer with ppl in the theater department. Ugh.

Its been. Two years now without actual friends irl to talk to. I hung out with one person but realized I kinda hate being around her so I stopped. I think im unapproachable. I try to be really nice but ig it doesnt rlly matter if theres no one talking to me to be nice to. ugh. Whatever. Whatever.

Its annoying being reminded of it. When I get bored in weekends I just sit and scroll on my phone. I cant go to the mall or see a movie with friends. Because I dont have any. When I make too many cookies I have to eat them all or throw them oit because I dont have friends to give them to. My mom asked if I had any friends that might enjoy some extras we had the other day. What am I supposed to fucking say. No I dont. I dont have anyone irl I can do anything with or give anything to so stop asking. ugh.

I love my family and im really lucky to have such great parents but it sucks having to do everything alone or with them. I want to see the ghibli fest with my friends not with my mom. A new cat cafe opened near me and you have to have someone above 18 with you if ur a minor. Im young for a senior since my birthday is in July so a lot of ppl around me are 18. But the only ones I know are my parents. I want to go to the mall or walk around this market street near me. Its boring to go alone and I dont want my parents there either. So I dont go.

Im running out of things to do. The bookstore is way too expensive compared to online. 20$ more in person isnt worth it. The library is nice but I cant do much there. Ive read all the things that interest me. Its so annoying going to a cafe just to sit on my phone. The money isnt really worth it.

Whatever. whatever

[v1trum]

Lots of tw's.. also please read the entire post if you start reading it. Im not a bad person. This is a specific case and i KNOW this person and have talked this stuff over w ppl that also know him. He manipulated me into hating the ppl i know i love most (as friends) now and did a lot of fucked up shit a lot of which I'll list

Tws include : sh, severe mental illness, "kys" jokes (wasnt rly a joke), ed, trauma, etcetc

Im only saying this shit on here because literally no one knows who im talking about and never will. This is an irl person who doesn't even have Tumblr im pretty sure.. I'd prefer if you only read this if ur a moot or i follow u or vice versa pls 😭

Im gonna throw the imaginary fights i have in my head on here

all the same person cus they side eye me at school and ik damn well he's trying to get ppl to not like me but idc cus im in the right and i have proof 💋

Like i just KNOW he views me as childish n shit

Likr

childish?? ME?? You're the one that said my 7 year old brother should kill himself because he played the same roblox game as you..a 14yo... But, yes, im the childish one...

its a genuine scenario I can't get out of my head and i need to talk abt it

Contrary to what you think, i DO like you. I don't hate you because my online best friend expressed how HE doesn't like you... Its actually crazy that you came into my home for a complete weekend, were as EXTREMELY disrespectful as you were, we didn't say anything and then you're out here saying me and my entire family hate you... Like no babes my parents went out and bought food from the store that we never eat bc you would eat it... No babes, i made cookies from scratch bc cookies are one of the only things you'll eat... No babes, we didn't even comment on the fact that you had three sodas and had two sips out of each of them before you wasted them...

Your "eating disorder" is DEFINITELY fake, too. There might be part of it in there but wdym "my grandparents starve me" when you asked if you could have a random bag of chips and they immediately bought it for you? I fear you just need to tell them when a food is out? They both work a ton bc they had to take you in a few months ago I don't think they notice much when the pantry or fridge is running low. Wdym "ew i hate that" to every food in existence but you scarf up wretched school breakfast and lunch daily...? Again with "i shove it down my throat bc my grandparents starve me" are you forgetting how close we got so quickly? How ik you? You wouldn't eat 95% of that before you starved to death if it was at my house... But you're gonna eat it all up there.

Same with your "personality disorder".... Wdym we're in the middle of English and you go "bro i just spawned in. What am i wearing and why? Omggg why do i have sh on my arms???" Like be so fr rn. You aren't immune to being aware of PHYSICAL PAIN. And i get like.. having a different style but fym "why am i wearing this what is it" ..? (I have talked to a SYSTEM friend abt this and they can confirm its v fake seeming)

Its actually crazy when i didn't kick you out after you said that about my brother, you're actually insane. I get you have very recent trauma but holy hell refrain from making relationships if you're gonna fuck someone up.

You had your "friend" give me back my sweater bc you were too childish to do it yourself and look me in the eye. You moved seats without permission. You glare at me in the class where you can't move seats.

Also, that "friend".. you call her a slut and talk shit abt her to her face because she has HEALED sh scars. Then you walk around campus with gaping wounds acting like you're self conscious of it when you're actually begging for attention. This is NOT me saying ppl who sh are attention seekers btw.. i KNOW him and me and several other people agree he's doing it for attention. My friends have said they'd have relapsed after seeing them if it had been a bad time for them, thats how bad it was.

I genuinely hope he gets better bc he is fucked up in the head, however i also wish the best on his next victim of "we're friends". I hope they get away or meet him after he has gotten better.

To this guy - i hope you better yourself instead of trying to make yourself as bad as possible because you find comfort in that, or rot.

[strafethesesinners]

Oc Tag Game

Tagged by @socially-awkward-skeleton @nuclearstorms and @strangefable to fill out this list for my ocs thank you!

Tagging @deputyash @depyotee @unleashed111 @shallow-gravy @florbelles @adelaidedrubman @henbased @inafieldofdaisies @trench-rot @afarcryfrommymain @wrathfulrook @deputy-morgan-malone @direwombat @roofgeese @clicheantagonist @allthearchetypes @nightwingshero @detectivelokis @8bitpizzacoupons @amistrio @cobb-vanthss and whoever wants to!

Favorite OC

What can I say? He’s my best friend, he’s my pal. He’s my homeboy, my rotten soldier. He’s my sweet cheese, my good-time boy. He’s my everything really. Cooper was the first ever OC I’ve ever made for a fandom and he helped free me from a years long stretch of no writing ideas. I’m still so excited about him and I think about him every day. I love that he’s become so iconic because he means so so much to me. I will hopefully get around to telling his full story soon.

Oldest OC

Once again it’s Cooper! Well, if we’re counting still active OCs. Technically I have some older for original stories but I don’t make stuff for them anymore. I made Cooper in May of 2020 and the rest is history. Haven’t looked back since.

Newest OC

Ward Drachen (real name Edward Smithfield) is my most recent OC. I made him uuuuh I honestly don’t remember exactly when but towards the end of last year I think, for rdr2/rdo. I still don’t have much for him, but I really wanted a red dead OC and came up with a basic idea. Hopefully more will come!

Meanest OC

Ward is the meanest OC hands down. This is one mean sunovabitch. He’s taciturn an standoffish, and has no discernible sense of humor. He sometimes delights in cruelty towards his enemies (who luckily can’t be called innocent by any stretch). Ward doesn’t give a shit about other people or their feelings, unless they get close to him and that’s a difficult feat.

Softest OC

It’s Valor! Valor puts on a bit of a tough guy act occasionally but it’s easy to see through, and honestly, he doesn’t try that hard to maintain it. This guy is a sweetheart honestly. He’s open and generous, friendly and upbeat. Once might even say bubbly. He’s a criminal but has never hurt anyone in the course of crimes (pre the events of his story) since they mostly consist of vehicle theft and sometimes data theft. (Cooper loses this one by having a little bit of a mean streak to him; he likes starting fights a little too much).

Most aloof/standoffish OC

Again it’s Ward. He’s not a people person.

Smartest OC

Heath is a pretty smart cookie. He was validictorian for his class in high school and all that and could have easily gotten in to most colleges if he hadn’t decided to join the army instead and then go onto the DEA after getting out. He’s also a little bit of a sleuth. He has a knack for investigation and moved up fast in the DEA because of it.

Dumbest (affectionate) OC

Sigh. Cooper was made to be a little bit of a himbo at first but gradually got dumber. This man went on the run from the law without changing his name or anything about his appearance. He can’t do basic math. He has a huge amount of trouble focusing on anything and is absent minded to the max.

OC I’d be friends with IRL

Valor! I love Cooper but he and I don’t have much in common so I think it would be hard to keep conversations going. Valor and I could totally talk video games and go out on the town together and look for hot guys. Valor is also interested in learning about new things and has a curious mind and great sense of humor so I think we’d get long great. I’d love to be friends with Coop but Valor is a more realistic option for someone I’d actually be friends with.