#I WAS TALKING TO MY KITCHEN APPLIANCES YOU FUCKING DONUT

[idk-bruh-20]

Irondad fic ideas #152

Every year around the holidays, a "bug war" breaks out in the Parker-Stark households 

Not bugs as in creepy crawlies. Technology bugs. Surveillance.

Tony and Peter are both determined to figure out what the other wants for the holidays 

The two are on surprisingly even ground: Peter's spider-sense doesn't consider this a threat, and FRIDAY won't snitch. They both have to find any "bugs" the old fashioned way.

Bonus:

Soon enough the whole Ironfam is wrapped up in it. November and December become a time of yearly paranoia, everyone watching what they say and "checking for bugs." 

Even Peter's friends discover tiny bugs on them. When Ned first learns the itty bitty robot behind his coat button is from Tony Stark trying to find out what he wants for Christmas he faints on the spot

Bonus 2, Crack Taken Seriously Boogaloo:

For a bit of drama: it's all fun and games until one year Peter gets kidnapped. The situation is bad. They only find him in time thanks to one of the "holiday bugs" Tony recently snuck on

[hollowbingbong]

Yutag things - Incorrect quotes

*bonds beyond time trio trying to con some random guy*

Yugi: Um, jaden, why are you pretending I'm this guy's family?

Jaden: We need money!

Yugi: You're scamming him?

Jaden: I was thinking more like flat-out stealing from him?

Yugi: What?! No way!

Jaden: Why not? We already stole Yusei!

Yusei: Hey guys

Yugi: No, we didn't. Yusei can think and talk for himself, he can do whatever he wants!

Yusei: I wanna steal

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Yuya: We need to distract these guys

Yuma: Leave it to me

Yuma: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss.

Astral, yuto, and yugo: *Immediately begin arguing*

Yuri, watching in horror: Oh this. I don’t like this. I don't like this at all.

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Jaden: I CAN'T DO IT!

Yusei, laughing: I CAN'T EITHER!

Jaden: I CANT FUCKING DO IT ANYMORE

Atem: WELL I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, YOU CAN EITHER GIVE UP NOW, OR WE CAN FIGURE IT OUT. BECAUSE WE CERTAINLY CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT YOU, AND WE KNOW YOU CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT US.

Jaden: I appreciate it,

Jaden: BUT LOOK WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH-

Yusaku: jaden-

Jaden: YOU GOTTA DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE!

Yuya: jay we gotta-

Jaden: YOU GOTTA DRAW A FUCKING LINE IN THE SAND. YOU GOTTA MAKE A STATEMENT.

Jaden: YOU GOTTA LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF AND SAY 'What am I willing to put up with today?'

Jaden, motioning to The Newest big bad they have to defeat: NOT FUCKING THIS

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*The squad is over at Yuma's house*

Yuya: Ohhhh, we each get our own oven?

Yuma, laughing: How many ovens do you think I have???

Yuya, motioning to yuma's kitchen: Three, I thought!

Yuga: I see a-

Yuma, motioning to one device: This is a microwave.

Yuga: Oh, well I-

Yuma: Hey wait wait, actually- hang on- *fiddles with the buttons on the microwave*

Yuma, amazed: Its got a bake setting!

Yuga: you learn something new every day!

Jaden: Do we- Do we roshambo for who gets to pick first?

Yuma: Now I've just discovered I have more ovens than I thought, we don't have to roshambo nothin!

Yuma: I am someone who owns four ovens...

Yuma, louder and way too happy: I am someone... who owns FOUR OVENS...

Yuma: I didn't know I was so rich with ovens...

Yuga, pointing to another appliance: Also the toaster oven!

Jaden: why do you have so many ovens??

Yuya: Ohhh, toasty boy! Four- Five ovens!

Yuma, fucking ECSTATIC: I AM SOMEONE WHO OWNS FIVE OVENS

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Atem: In your opinion, what’s the height of stupidity?

Yusaku: *turning to jaden* How tall are you?

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Atem: Nothing in life is free.

Yuya: Love is free!

Jaden: Adventure is free.

Yuga: Knowledge is free.

Yusaku and Yusei: Everything is free if you take it without paying.

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Yuya: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life

Yugo: Self-esteem, haven't seen you in years!

Yuri: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this!

Yuma: I knew I lost that potential somewhere!

Yuto: My moral code, is that you?

Yuya:

Yuya: I was just gonna show you this cool trunk my dad left me but do you guys need a hug?

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Yugi: Good morning.

Yusaku: Good morning.

Shoma: Good morning.

Jaden: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit.

Yuga: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS

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Jaden: That’s one of my biggest fears. Like, if I ever woke up as a donut...

Yusei: You would eat yourself?

Jaden: I wouldn’t even question it.