#I LOVE THE FUCKING DEATH EATERSSSSSS. literally a workplace sitcom. i think about them daily

[foursaints]

tom riddle as a muggle-raised halfblood orphan is wonderful because you’d THINK his villain origin story is all the horcrux stuff but really it’s just the experience of trying to wrangle a class year of pampered slytherin heirs into one household. tom doesn’t even have a house elf so half of the emergent DE are politely avoiding putting their jackets down on the furniture in fear of getting his plebeian germs on them & grimacing behind his back but telling him it’s all fine, old bean, really, his house is so charmingly quaint :)

1/3 of the death eaters are engaged to each other since childhood, another 1/3 are having affairs, and the remaining third has unimaginably intricate ancient beef that traces back to someone’s great-great-grandfather snubbing another’s at a ministry gala in 1860. but its largely impossible to tell who hates who because they’re all obligated to be backstabby fake-friends with each other. 

just staggering amounts of social skills that tom got them fearing for their lives and wearing cult outfits within the year. could you imagine trying to explain to your terrifying pureblood patriarch father that, sorry, you’re moving out because actually WAY MORE afraid of this random 20-something grad student whose failed lifelong dream was to be a high school teacher. and he wants you to live in his Scooby Doo Villain house and call him a made-up name.