#I FOUND YOUR TRUE LOVE

[vaguely-concerned]

the more I play the more I think lucanis basically knows it's illario who betrayed him right from the beginning (he's had a year in the ossuary to think. not that many people knew where he was going. when you ask him 'did Illario know you'd be on that ship' his only answer is the hardest flattest 'yes' you ever heard). so it's not so much about figuring out who the traitor is (because that's ludicrous. we all know. immediately. they didn't really bother to hide it lmao) as about methodically closing off every single avenue of denial lucanis has clung to that whole time with as much or little gentleness as you might prefer until he has no choice but to admit it. because the moment he has to admit it, he'll have to do something -- feel something -- about it. and that's such a catastrophic event in lucanis' inner landscape (he has had TWO people in this whole entire world up until now and will do anything to hold on to them with a heartbreaking child-like desperation, even at and especially through the detriment of his own self) that he'd rather just. not. what if we quite simply. didn't. what if we just stayed here in the emptiness where we can both pretend you didn't hurt me in a way I should never forgive. I have so much practice in that with caterina already it's always worked out great for everyone so far. (press x to fucking doubt but that's trauma logic for you lol)

after everything illario did, so much of the storm of lucanis' emotions around it is 'what the FUCK did you get yourself tangled up in this time and how do I get you out of this mess safely'. what's worse: the fact that your brother murdered you, or that he put himself in horrible danger doing so and thus exposed you to the risk of losing him forever. lucanis' heart certainly has an opinion here and it's fucking unhinged (affectionate)

the themes of dissociation in lucanis' character in general makes me feel nuts. allllll these contradictory messy things he needs to cut off from each other because they can't coexist or be easily reconciled inside him. but all remain stubbornly true separately anyway and will have their due one day. love and resentment. tenderness and fear and rage. terror and longing. love and freedom don't coexist. the burned out golden child anthem is playing in the background. he was always caterina's favourite and he has to keep striving to deserve that dubious honour with every breath he takes and then, presumably, mercifully, some day he will die and be excused and can rest. and until now he's suppressed all the -- natural, healthy, protective! -- negative feelings that threaten the few attachment relationships he actually has, at the cost of ever actually having his needs for connection and safety met and leaving his core self imprisoned and compromised. and spite goes 'what. no. that's dumb fuck that' (*spite voice* I do not understand that and even if I did I would not respect it) and does not allow him to fall back into that, which I think is what saves his life, ultimately. it took being possessed by a demon for lucanis to even contemplate telling anyone he loves 'no' in any way, but hey. whatever gets you there right lol

lucanis is dealing with the freeze response allll the way down baby. and he was even before the ossuary, that just turbo powered it and brought it to a breaking point way before it could happen naturally. but something was going to break eventually no matter what, and I'm just glad that in the end, through the power of friendship and also pure spite, it doesn't have to be him

[demigods-posts]

hearing annabeth express genuine confusion at the existence of disney world was incredibly heartbreaking. but it raised a good point about just how unprepared she was for a life outside of camp. it makes me wonder how she settled into a public school environment after training as a child soldier for five years straight. i question what her first active shooter drill was like and if the teachers noticed how prepared she seemed for life or death situations in comparison to her english homework. i wonder how she socialized with kids her age, or if she mostly kept to herself because the anxiety of making a misstep in social situation and risk being neglected was near crippling. i think of the quiet moments at home during bedtime ruined by the slightest movement outside and her father finding her keeping watch outside her brothers' bedroom at three in the morning. how heartbreaking is it that annabeth can't find true solace in any environment she's in?

[rosie-tyler]

Moulin Rouge AU

The story follows Moulin Rouge star performer, Daniel LaRusso, and an American writer, Johnny Lawrence, as they navigate through a tumultuous love affair. Little do they know about John Kreese's plan: set LaRusso up with a wealthy man, Terry Silver, to take revenge on Mr. Miyagi, Daniel's father.

[stars-self-ships]

💖 Hey, you! 💖

Your F/O wanted me to relay some words of love and affirmations to you! They wanted you to know...

You are worthy of love and belonging.

You do not need to 'earn' rest.

Everything you do, whether it's big or small, has a purpose.

You are more talented than you lead yourself on.

You deserve to take pride in what you create and do.

You have such a wonderful smile, and you really should smile more often.

It is okay to be sensitive. It is okay to not be okay. It is okay to cry.

You are strong. Whatever you are going through, you can pull through. You always have.

Take deep breaths. Drink some water. Get something to eat if you need it.

You are loved more than you could ever fathom.

And honestly... I couldn't agree with them more! 💖💖💖

[mamawasatesttube]

if im being entirely honest i gotta say, people who adamantly insist kon is clark's brother and ONLY his brother are nearly as annoying as people who insist kon is clark's son. the fact of the matter is that there are canon panels both of them calling their relationship more like siblings and of them calling it more like parent-and-child. like why are you guys all so fucking obsessed with nuclear family labels and putting relationships in these boxes? take my hand. free yourselves from the chains of the western traditional nuclear family model. relationships do not have to align 1:1 with these roles. be free

[onlylurkingreadingstuff]

I saw a recent reblog you did where you listed some fic recs and then tagged with your fic preferences, which are pretty much my own, favoring canon compliance fics where they're angel/demon (though I have read some 'temporarily human' AUs I've liked). Do you have a collected rec list? Or any more recs you might toss out? Thanks so much!

Oh gosh yes.

I’m going to assume you have already explored the other fics bu the authors in the first rec post I made- everything by @redfacesmiley, @books-and-omens , @racketghost , and Drawlight/ripeteeth is a stunner. Also dig through equestrianstatue and @darcylindbergh for real gems.

When I’m reading I find a fic I like, dig through all the author’s other fics, then look at the author’s bookmarks because I figure if they wrote something I like that much, they saved things I’ll like too.

Fell free to dig through my AO3 bookmarks- they are completely unorganized and I bookmark things I want to read later or think I might want to read again, basicly anything I might want to find again- so I haven’t even read all of them. BUT! Here are some more of THOSE FICS for me:

It's Funny Because Nobody Ever Says “Burkina Faso” by indieninja92

TIME LOOP TIME LOOP TIME LOOP!!!!

So funny omg. Azi is just DONE and I am here for it. It’s a locked fic to AO3 accounts so I’m not sure if the link will work-

What I shed for You by @darcylindbergh

This fic- this freakin fic!! I did not think I would ever go for a fic that was NOT azicrow but oh my god this one is so good.

But You My Dear Are An Ocean by megzseatle

After nursing his broken heart, Crowley moves on. He gets a cottage and relocates to South Downs to start over, and finds himself beloved in a small town where the people take him under their (proverbial) wing. His new friends are in no mood for charity when his ex shows back up- while Crowley might be able to forgive Az, the townspeople have a harder time with the bastard that broke dear Anthony’s heart.

If I’ve had a bad day and need to cheer up, I read this book! Omens sweet story.

…And if I’m in an emotionally stable place I will read this angsty heartbreaker. So beautiful, just so good.

Idiot/ Guts (and a load of Warbirgon’s Farmhouse White) / Ellipsis by @theyellowestmustard

A little slice of perfect right here.

I also love outsider POV criptids of soho stories- here are two good ones, one set in a coffee shop and one in a bakery.

[probablygayattorneys]

keep cool down in the quiet of the morning sweat blood when the sun comes through thick mist on the pond before the temple headed down for the final rendezvous

(training montage, the mountain goats)

[kinos-fortress-2]

what does one unfinished fic from like 2022 of a very rareshipp does a to a mf

and also a trashy playlist that got me in my own feelings...

[thesleepykettle]

Have y'all read Joy Demorra's Hunger Pangs yet, because if you haven't you should.

Also does anyone remember this meme? A few Novembers ago @thebibliosphere put the trio on the ot3 bunk and I feverishly sketched this up before immediately getting sick and completely forgetting all art until I got better.

But nothing can stop my love for these three!!!

Also I know Nathan doesn't go to bed a wolf every night but wolf made the meme funnier.

[goldenchocobo]

Found Out.

Companion Piece to Vanitas'

[maripr]

I think John Ward deserves to break down a little at the end of FAITH bc he just destroyed the cult that groomed him since childhood and abused him and his childhood friend, he's managed to protect everyone he loves, he's realized God's been with him the entire time, he has fred all the souls that were taken hostages in the rite of the second death, and he has been forgiven by the very person he wronged. He deserves to break down a bit, after things have calmed down, as Lisa and Garcia both hold him as his falls on his knees and his shoulder shake and he holds his crucifix close like he's hugging it and he wails like a child and as the tears fall on the cross once bronze, they leave golden streak, cleansing his vision of it, cleansing his heart.

[taamlok]

how did "i loved your ghost, i never stopped. i'm still waiting. your chloe" after being separated by space and time become "meh i like you i guess but not enough to live in vermont"

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Worry not for the Nameless Red Disciple, they just went down to the river to chill with the river turtles!

[winterfromtevinter]

All of the hate for Neve re Lucanis from his fans is sooooo weird. Sorry she's beautiful and funny and -

[pinkvelvetletter]

new webtoon alert

press play, sami

a badass girl living on her own, doing side jobs to pay her living expenses, accidentally ends up befriending two boys in her school but who got time for that when you’re out there looking out for sales and discount deals

tragic backstory, refreshing personality of mc, takes up a tiny revenge on her bully, new school new personality, even a gay (or bi) character, pretty ass curls, and two pretty guys looking after the girl while she’s out there killing it

[itspileofgoodthings]

sometimes I make a post and then have to save it to drafts so I can gauge if it’s too shallow/flippant for me to share with the general public.