#I FORGOT HOW SHORT I MADE MY SWAIN
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violetlearnschinese · 10 months ago
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today is 6/30/2024 i just wanna write up a log of the things that i've tried so far i guess
i feel like my chinese learning journey is kinda interesting bc . i'm more addicted to trying to innovate/revolutionize/optimize how to learn chinese more than actually learning chinese . and sure some of that could be attributed to instant gratification or wtvr, but also i am also rly addicted to trying to solve physics-esque/mathy problems and that's just what my brain is inclined towards doing, like if it recognizes smth as mathy and nonoptimal then it'll compulsively search for a solution lol . usually this activity doesnt actually turn out to be super productive (and a lot of the time it can seem like im just Wildly Overcomplicating things, and there's definitely an argument for that, yes) but i believe it's at least Somewhattt useful + at least i enjoy the rush (sometimes) + maybe one day ill finally get some Good idea and then ill make millions !!! or maybe that is just what i tell myself to cope . Lmao . anyway.
chinese course at brown
hellochinese
made the whole diagram thing (i was so anal abt this (and esp its application to music) and eventually changed opinion to yeah sure it was correct but not a good way to approach learning bc kids arent just magical sponges but instead the reason that they learn quickly is bc 24/7 private tutor (their mother) + fast iteration)
anki spoonfed chinese too hard
may 23 night - may 24 day
call w regan, she inspired me to just go thru my chinese textbook bc she made me think damn maybe i should just try being normal for once
went thru half of chinese textbook
felt like i wasnt rly learning well past lesson 5 (and lessons 1-5 were mostly review anyway)
may 24-25 ish
found lazychinese.com comprehensible input
found other CI people existed
searched through a Lot, couldnt find much at my level, either way too easy for total beginner or too hard nothing to grasp onto or just no variety of sentence structures
may 25 night
salena sent me the gay guy i could sorta understand him, like i could latch on to smth
coded the thing
went over the video w transcript for a day or two
may 26 day
saw the baby in pool
may 26 night
watched n followed funny easy chinese ig/tiktok accts
may 26/27
tried peppa pig / cartoons / stories on yt / etc, still too hard
may27
up until now, really mostly input little output
peppa pig longest sentence
turned on chinese keyboard
chatgpt convo
texting w friends
wow im not bad
hearing is impt, then pure imitating, then say it while pinyin, then understand
u will not see gains intra-day 1 bc gains r slow obv u need multiple days etc wtvr 2 bc gains happen during Sleep (ie After the learning session, Not During)(analogy to gym, u dont get stronger inside of one session, ur muscle builds up After the session is done)(i notice improvement after one or two days)
do many short sessions, but also include some long sessions
imitating a sentence/paragraph whole-part-whole . listen to the whole thing, then split into parts, then put the parts together . like learning a piano piece . (also this is fractal - if too big, split up)
around this time i tried brute forcing comprehensible input via lazychinese.com, but found it too slow/unoptimal/wtvr
flirting w krashen's hypothesis and i see so many success stories abt krashen (e.g. https://www.reddit.com/r/languagelearning/comments/wetbjo/i_learned_english_through_magic_and_input_krashen/)
this was interesting too, i forgot what i got out of it but it was interesting (https://www.reddit.com/r/languagelearning/comments/r9g1s3/i_immersed_in_spanish_for_900_hours_without_any/)
eventually i disagree w krashen and think he's stupid bc my brother cant speak tagalog
opinion abt tutors
also found out that it lines up with more modern language acquisition theories and critiques of krashen: swain's comprehensible output + dekeyser’s skill building
hypothesis abt memorizing stories might be better than flashcards
like a memory palace but it's stories not palaces
du chinese analysis failed (unique word density starts at 12% then goes to 6%)
i think about here i stopped being so anal about the whole ... diagram that was rooted in kids being sponges
i dont hate language classes as much
trying to brute force grammar
current hypothesis/method:
trying to brute force grammar
same hypothesis abt memorizing stories to learn vocab, but now using AI generated stories (unique word density starts at 32% then goes to 20%. much better!)
build a huge foundation (learn lots of textbook grammar and vocab) (get lots of clay), then iron it out (practice listening/speaking/reading/writing/wtvr to acquire more natural idiomatic expressions and also just increase your speed/skill etc etc) (roll the clay)
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shinaa-fictions · 3 years ago
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HOW TO CATCH A BUTTERFLY (Part 1)
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Universe : Battle Academia 
Characters : Katarina, Garen, Wukong,... (Heimerdinger, Swain, Darius)
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Next coming match was an event Wukong would celebrate until his throat would dry!  He kept hopping in front of Garen with his monkey ease, praising their teamplay like nothing would stop them from winning. Garen was listening with a distracted ear,  scrolling through the timetable on his digital tablet. 
“Next class is with Professor Heimer. Shall be… there!”
Wukong shifted from pure euphoria to a funny pouty face. 
“Engineer classes are the worst! I don’t need to know how things damn work, when they work! If it’s broken, I'll just buy a new one!”
This would have given Garen a laugh if his friend was not a walking disaster.
“Just like the TV screen you’ve wrecked at the dorms?” he retorted with a frown.
Wukong would rail about this “petty accident” as they walked into the classroom. They usually never arrived before the bell had rung so this time they discovered a half-empty room. Group by group, students were casually chatting, cooling it off before facing a few hours of tricky engineer teaching by one of the zaniest teachers of the Labrys Academy. 
They aimed for the back of the class, their usual spot,  but a new face stopped them in the way. 
“Who’s that?” Wukong asked.
Garen had the feeling he had seen the girl before: a short beauty with a sharp gaze and hair with this funny cotton candy color. Someone you cannot forget, but who was not part of their class. He squinted his eyes.
“I think that’s the assistant principal’s daughter…”
The girl raised an eye in their direction, interrupting the reading of her lesson book. They were not being discreet at all. The boys froze for a moment, pierced by this blue judging eye. Then, she returned to her studies, indifferent.
Garen and Wukong took place at the other side of the classroom since the desk beside the windows was taken by this intriguing girl. 
“She’s a first year, huh? Rather cute if you wanna know my point!” Wukong whispered to Garen, making sure, this time, the girl would not hear.
Garen would not invalidate this statement: from the little he saw, she looked quite “good” for his standards. But her genealogy was a problem he could not ignore:
“So what? You intend on trying your luck with this pert little miss?”
“C’mon, you won’t score a goal if you don’t try!”
This quote remained a bit mysterious for Garen, but his friend seemed quite proud about it so he made no comment.
The short on legs professor Heimer -one of the few teachers referred as “professor” even by the teachers themselves- entered the classroom and started with a long and painful introduction about the miracle of thermodynamics. 
“Oh! And I almost forgot”
Everyone was waiting for something worse; Wukong almost shed a tear.
“We’re greeting a new student in our course. Could you get up, please?”
He was talking to the bubble gum haired girl from earlier. She was taken off guard and hesitated before obeying. 
“Please present yourself and explain to your comrades why you’re here!” the professor Heimer asked with his annoying high-pitched voice. 
She was frowning, uncomfortable about this idea, but Garen was almost sure he saw her fluster for a second. 
“My name is Katarina Du Couteau, and I’m here for…”
She seemed a bit confused about the necessity of giving the others any other information concerning her presence here. As silence swallowed her thoughts, whispers started crawling across the classroom. Her name, of course : they had heard it before and knew what it meant. 
Privileges. 
Katarina hated that feeling: being stared at like she was nothing but a rich spoiled brat. None of these idiots would have worked like she did, so how could they glare at her like this? Her attitude got a bit more aggressive and she closed like an oyster.
“Who cares...”
She fell back on her seat, making sure to avoid the professor’s gaze. A few chuckles merged from the silence, far from being compassionate. Feeling quite responsible, the teacher came to her rescue:
“Well… Katarina is a first year student, just like you all, but her courses do not include the little corner of science you’re lucky to be part of!”
A long death rattle escaped from the students mouths, which was instantly interrupted by the professor’s scolding. He punished them by starting the class immediately!
Katarina found herself relieved that everybody forgot about her: she looked into her pencil case and picked a golden fountain pen. She wisely opened her notebook, looking way more studious than the rest of the class. Garen followed her motions, from when she combed hair to the moment she started taking notes.  A part of him rejected this snooty attitude, but the other was strafing a thousand questions…
After three painful hours, the classroom dispersed in a blink. Katarina took all her time to gather her stuff, looking bored as always. She gazed aside as a monkey face hopped to her direction. 
“So, name is Katarina heh? I can call you Kat? Or Kitty? Kitty’s kind of cute but you look like a rock band girl so I’m not sure that’s fitting you well”
He had spoken so fast it was impossible to interrupt him. He confessed once it was a seduction skill he tweaked for years: never let them the opportunity to refuse. Garen stayed at a safe distance, but watched for the new disaster about to happen.
Katarina showed no interest in Wukong’s presence, finishing sorting everything in her black and pink striped school bag. 
“Shy, heh? That’s fine. But if you ever wanna hang around, I’m…. HEEH!!” Wukong never finished his sentence: a firm hand launched at his neck and grabbed both his vest and shirt in a tough grip. The monkey-boy got what he wanted: his face now in close range from the new girl’s, but oddly, this did not feel romantic at all. 
Garen twitched, about to reach out for his friend, but Katarina’s words got him stuck in the process: 
“If you talk to me again, I’ll pull this big stupid skull out of its trunk and stuff it where the sun never shines…”
She released Wukong and picked her bag on one shoulder, not even giving a second glare to the boys; then she left the classroom with a fast but imperial walk. 
This incident did not hit on the boys: Wukong was a well-known troublemaker whose friendly attitude could often lead to very bad misunderstandings. Garen was used to come to his rescue, gladly picking up fights in the name of their friendship, but this new adversary was nobody he wanted to challenge. Her cold attitude confirmed all his bias and, no matter how enticing  her vibrant blue eyes were and how elegant her pink mane would look when she waved it off her shoulder, she… wait, what was the statement of this sentence again?
No time for flirting anyway ! An important exam was about to decide Garen's future. Since he had run from home, he could only rely on the academy’s good favors. However, his quarrelsome attitude made the school council questioning these favors more than once: the only way he could keep himself in the academy’s good graces was by reaching the top ladder of the Battle Club. And a new test was about to choose the leads for this starting semester. 
Garen knew he was good at combat and had no hesitation he could beat it with a bit of warm-up training. Each session required to face a battle sequence against the school dummies, which Garen could practice during the school time hours. But this was not enough! He wanted to train as often as possible. So he needed to meet with the principal and ask him for a special authorization. 
But Garen was afraid his reputation would set in the way, and he was not wrong about that…
Principal Swain raised a confused eyebrow after hearing Garen’s plee. Labrys Academy was full of troublesome delinquants but Garen Crownguard was a recurrent name on his  stack of complaints.
“Your referent teacher can give you access to the training arenas during school hours.” 
“I know that, but… I’ve heard one of my comrades from the Battle club had a special badge so they have access to the pit after class time.” 
The word “comrade” had never been so hard to speak up for Garen. He hated that stupid axe waver. But he could not talk dirty about Darius in front of the principal who was his most loyal mentor.
“A few trustworthy students can ask for this authorization. One per club. You can still borrow a badge from one of them”
Swain threw a cruel smile on him: he perfectly knew competition was the heart of their scholar system so no other student would be fool enough to give their own advantage to an outcast like Garen. 
This interview had been a waste of time, just like he expected. 
Okay, plan B. Wukong’s idea had sounded dumb at first but since it was his only option left, he decided to wait at the entrance of the arena’s gates until someone showed up. With his reputation, he had one chance out of ten that someone would comply and let him in. But “you won’t score a goal if you don’t try”… no, this definitly sounded too dumb.
The long wait was more exhausting than he had planned. There, sitting alone, he could hear a real din coming from the other side of the double steel doors of the battle room. Their training lasted for hours, exceeding the normal school hours. Garen hoped these students would allow him to borrow the room until the next day, but as soon as the gates opened, he felt a knot in his stomach: Darius was there, with a few members of the Battle club.
When he saw Garen, all by himself, waiting like an abandoned puppy on this bench, Darius laughed:
“You’ve lost something, blondie? Or maybe ya’r waiting for mamma to open these doors so you can come in and play”
The club’s leader and his loyal supporters sniggered at Garen without mercy, which triggered some tension points in the boy’s brain. 
“I don’t need that to get on the top leaderboards” he spitted back.
Darius snorted and made his way out of the waiting room, leaving Garen in front of this impenetrable, unbreakable, and insolent closed door. 
He waited for another dozen minutes, about to give up, when feminine footsteps lured his attention. He hoped for a teacher this time, someone he could negotiate with, but when he saw the singular frame of the assistant principal’s daughter, his hopes got mentally slapped once again. 
Katarina barely gazed at him, straightly aiming for the electronic card reader on the wall. She pulled a badge out of her jacket and disabled the security system, opening the giant gates. 
Darius’ injurious words were still echoing in Garen’s head, pushing him to take an inappropriate decision. He rushed after Katarina before the gates would close, entering by force in this temple of fighting. He was not feeling proud of it, but he did not expect to be a bother anyway: two instead of one in such a vast arena would not make such a big difference.  
Katarina turned back and noticed the intruder. Her stern gaze clearly showed how unhappy she was about the idea of sharing her training grounds.
“Did I invite you in?”
She showed no sympathy and would probably already have snapped his face if he was not two meters tall. Garen argued:
“The battle pit is big enough for you and I… and I won’t disturb you”
“Oh, you won’t? That’s adorable” she replied, ironically.
Each word she could speak was like a needle in the skin. But how could she throw him out now? He did not know yet she was part of the Assassin club and could settle up conflicts the roughest way possible. He was lucky enough Katarina decided otherwise. She threw her bag on the ground, her attitude still openly disapproving, put a full water bottle on a bench and headed for the control panel to start her own session.
Garen felt victorious, even if his training pal showed little enthusiasm. He was about to trigger his own session when a sudden need for a conversation held him back:
“How come you have a pass? You’re a club lead or something?”
He perfectly knew she was none of those. He could have just trained in complete silence after earning -with wicked ways- his ticket to the arena pit, but curiosity made his lips move by themselves. But all that he received in return was a cold silence.
Katarina was not willing to have a conversation with this beefy head of an intruder. She acted just like he did not exist, throwing her first knives on the training dummy at a fair distance. All right in the center mark on the digital face drawn on its metallic surface. An easy warm-up.
Garen watched her acting standoffish, not very impressed by her performance on a steady target. 
“I see…” he muttered.
Katarina felt an itch in her neck: she would have hoped not to have heard these two simple words. What does he see? What does he know? He probably thought her father delivered this badge to her -and he would have been right- but she had battled to earn it on grounds he could never ever step in.
“And you, why are you embushing girls during late hours before locking yourself up with them?”
She did not wait for him to bounce on her sarcasm: she added with a sneaky smile:
“Oh, don’t answer”
Garen frowned. Did she just imply he was a woman abuser? What a low blow. Garen could be called a thug sometimes but he had a real respect for women, beating them up equally with the other hoods of the campus. 
He gave up on trying to communicate with her: the more he would scratch the surface, the more he would regret it. This girl had a serious problem and he really did not want to help her solve it. 
His training dummies had showed up, giving him the chance to go for a “strike and dodge” session. He gave a few hits in the holographic figures protected by a magnetic aura that would beat back the contact of a melee weapon, imitating the impact against a real target, but with low casualty. Garen just enjoyed the sensation of real combat, way different from the usual petty school confrontations. In total concentration, he almost forgot his annoying host who came back charging like a bull, maybe even trying to have him leave by tickling sensitive subjects:
“Why don’t you train with your friends from the Battle club?”
Garen startled. Not only did she interrupt him, but she knew way more about him than he would have expected. 
“I…had some words with a few members��, he clumsily answered.
Katarina could not hold back an amused smile.
“Words, heh?”
She would not buy it, of course. So Garen rectified:
“We do not always agree on the club’s decisions”
“Or maybe you’re the type of guy who just punches before asking” Katarina stated, incredulous.
She turned at her training dummies -now slightly moving back and forward- and threw a volley of knives right in their forehead. Her words were about to aim for his brain as well:
“I know you’ve got a discipline examination yet, and Labrys ain’t the most strict when it comes to misconduct. This tells a lot about you… and your noisy monkey friend can’t be the only cause…”
Proud like a peacock, she gazed at him without a single hint of fear in her eyes:
“But if you wanna have ‘words’ with me, I can defend myself”
This little demonstration was, without any doubt, a way to warn him. This display of skills would have impressed him if he was not as thick headed as her. He started taking this all as a challenge, a duel where the best would not only be winning with words, but with combat moves.
“You always show teeth to people you don’t know?” he asked with a light chuckle.
“Oh, I know the likes of you” Katarina replied, losing none of her superb. “You parade in the corridors with your big fancy sword, picking fights against whoever tries to claim territory, like dogs…”
A clashing sound of rough metal pretended to give a point to her speech, but she had way more to say:
“You think because you were born in the mud, that's how you’re meant to behave all your life long”
This last statement gave some hope to Garen: she had some files missing.
“You haven’t studied your homeworks well enough, milady”
His confidence back again, he swayed that blade with big energy, cutting through dummies with such violence the machine considered their electro-magnetic shields broken and dematerialized them completely. No chance he would let Darius win…
“I prefer mud over the golden bars of the prison my parents had built for me.”
He could not admit yet the real cause of his departure was his sister, a more docile catch in his parents’ golden cage. This thought brought a moody comment with it:
“I would rather kill myself than becoming daddy’s precious baby”
Katarina felt directly insulted. Even prepared, Garen could clearly consider the look she threw at him like the less engaging thing he had ever seen. She had dropped the knives for deadlier tools: her twin daggers, two elegant killers about to see their owner display all her inner rage.
“I know what you think. You think I’m having fun attending extra courses and bearing late training sessions with morons like you?” she said with a stormy voice..
Then she launched at her own practice target, aiming for their fictive throat represented by a thin glowing line. But Garen could clearly read between the lines: this deadly dance, yet pleasant to watch, was carrying way too much anger. He had been there and still probably was, so he could not fully appreciate the swimming precision of her blows.
“Staying late, heh? If I were you, I’d be avoiding getting back home as well…”
These words almost slipped from his throat. Maybe he related way too easily to this sad girl’s condition while he first just came in to warm-up a bit for the next exam. 
He understood the seriousness of his mistake when the machine Katarina cut in half bounced over the edge separating each pit. A security defect, without any hesitation. The girl pointed a threatening dagger at his direction, openly aggressive now.
“That’s it! You think you won? You think escaping your pathetic condition makes you aware of who I am?”
“Just drop it” Garen replied with a sigh, trying to control the fire. “You’re taking this way too personally”
Her chest shaken by an irregular breath, Katarina stayed standing and panting, her gaze not letting off Garen. The wrath on her face prepared for a spicy counter attack, but Garen hoped it would not imply physical violence.
“I’m not a quitter like you!” she shouted. “All I do, I do it for myself first. And I don’t use my family to justify my behavior!” 
She went harder on the targets, violating the school rules asking to wait for the recovery time in between each session so the practice tools would not be damaged. This rage inspired Garen, giving him the same passion to double his own efforts. He took down his dummies, one after the other, triggering error messages on the control screen. He felt in transe, his muscles tensed to the extreme as he showed to these dummies how destructive his spinning blast could be.
After he had beaten the last one, he rested his giant weapon, taking a moment to retort:
“No matter how hard you work, you’ll never be valuable to their eyes!” 
His last words were cruel but came from the bottom of his heart, so he almost shouted them:
“You’ll never be good enough to deserve his affection!”
A new dummy popped his head out of a glitchy half-broken device. Another one about to fall. Garen struck so hard into its metallic shape, it got ejected out of his pit, crossing the arena like a dangerous bullet and knocking out Katarina’s bottle of water that was standing just a few meters away from her on a bench.
Still stunned, Katarina took a while to react. Her eyes followed the training dummy that crashed a bit further, wrecked in pieces. Then she gazed back at Garen who remained clueless about this incident, a confused -even dumb- look on his face.
Not only was there a giant puddle in the middle of the room but also a smoking robot dummy that probably cost an entire year at the academy. The school would probably ask for a report… so Garen thought.
He was expecting a scathing comment from Katarina, even a mocking laugh. But without a word or a look, she picked her bag and threw it on her shoulder before leaving the place with a quick step.
It was when Garen obtained what he wished for -the pit for himself alone- that his mouth filled with a bitter taste. If only she had thrown a last sharp word at him, even an insult… but this cold silence had left him helpless, almost saddened by the whole situation.
He had played a dangerous game. From the very start, he had used his own experience as a rejected child from a prestigious family to throw his frustration on Katarina. It wasn’t fair, he could realize it now.
He picked the bottle on the ground and followed the girl’s trail. The heavy gates closed behind him and would not allow him to cross them again in the other way. But his choice was made.
“Wait!”
Garen did not hope to find Katarina this quickly, but she was waiting outside in front of the main entrance road. He stopped by his side as she stared at him, curious. The evening sky was reflecting on her scarred eye, giving it infinite depths.
“I’m sorry… I got carried away” Garen started apologizing, his thoughts melting together because of the paradoxical emotions fighting in his head at this moment.
She looked way calmer, slowly blinking as she listened to him. Surprisingly enough, it was easier for Garen to face an angry Katarina rather than the one he had in front of him now, all wrapped in silence as the sunlight bathed on her porcelain skin. 
“You… forgot your bottle” he sputtered while handing her the half-empty water bottle he totally wrecked earlier.
Katarina slowly picked it, inspecting it with a doubtful eye before waving her head. Did he really bring back the smashed bottle like a good dog to make up for his stupid move?
“You serious?” 
Her words stroke Garen like a violent discharge. And suddenly, he realized what kind of ridiculous situation he had just jumped into. This gave him an honest smile.
“Yeah, I’ll pay you another” he promised, scratching the back of his neck.
He could not just leave like this, not after behaving like the dumbest dumb in existence. From his nearly two meters tall, he had a good look over Katarina now, and maybe it was because of the ambient light that made everything look on fire, but she was among the prettiest girls he had ever met. And without any doubt the most intriguing one. What kind of thoughts would be hiding behind these suspicious eyebrows was now an obsession for him: he just could not end this day on such a bad note, she did not deserve that…
“I have a better idea. Why don’t I offer you a drink, a real one? To catch up for… everything”
Words were hard to tell but he found this unexpected courage deep in his guts to speak them out loud.
Katarina’s eyes lit up suddenly, which almost caused Garen to step back.
“Are you seriously asking for a date after all this?”
Garen was caught off-guard. He tried to find something around him where to anchor his gaze but it would always come back to this superb girl who was questioning his intentions. 
“I did not think of it as a date but…”
His smile betrayed him again.
“I’d be a fool not trying”
After all this disaster of an evening, he expected nothing less than being cast aside the toughest way possible. She had shown teeth in the past and even gave him goosebumps when they did this little battling competition. How in the world would she…?
“I’ll take the more expensive one…” Katarina replied.
Garen blinked. Was this a positive answer? He interrogated her gaze, trying to find a trick before getting slammed again by her ruthless repartee. But she would not say anything, swinging her shoulders lightly as a cunning smile enlightened her pretty face. 
Garen was bold, more than all the other brutes she used to know. His excuses made her take the advantage, and now that the ball was in her court, she would either play with it until it deflated or… who knows ?
Sure thing was he still had a lot to learn from this riddle of a student that had stormed into his life on this beautiful day of autumn. 
“Name is Garen!” He proudly introduced himself.
A black Chevy car crossed the academy’s gates and drove down to their position. Katarina waved her head, turning her back to Garen as she left him with an enigmatic “I know” as their last exchanged words for the day.
She entered the car and disappeared from Garen’s sight. 
A fleeting… but delicious sight.
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that-house · 5 years ago
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Hey so I hit 100 followers today!
Buckle up, this is gonna be a LOOOONG post.
I quite honestly expected it (while my ego is a little smaller than my jokes make it out to be it is definitely present), I didn’t expect it to happen so fast.
It’s not an insane milestone, plenty of people have 100 followers. A hefty portion of my followers are bigger than me. But it’s still important to me. Knowing that there’s 100 people out there who enjoy my shit makes me happy.
First and foremost the credit quite honestly has to go to ahegao George Washington. No, I’m not joking. Until I posted on r/tumblr about my desire to draw that, I had 0 followers. I jumped to like 10 overnight, which was awesome. And then those new followers helped me spread my posts and get more attention.
Secondly I’d like to shoutout @imaverysadgirl and @themeaninglessjumble. You two were my first real tumblr frens. You were the first of my followers to really interact with me. Ember, I’m super happy you’re alive to see me hit 100 followers. Jumble (I don’t know your name unless I forgot it), your art and creations are great and you deserve way more attention.
To all the rest of you, you guys are great, too. Every new follower makes me happy. I’d say I don’t deserve you all, but my colossal ego says I do. Regardless, being nemesi and getting called out for being horny on main and sending and receiving asks has made this last month or so great.
Finally, for all the shit it gets, and for all the shit it pulls, [tumblr] really is pretty dope. I got to meet you all, and it’s actively making me a better person by exposing me to groups of people I’d rarely interact with in real life.
Why does it feel like I’m saying goodbye? I’m not, don’t worry. I plan to stay, and neither death nor pain shall drive me from this hellsite. I’m just saying thanks.
Now with the thanks out of the way, I want to talk about myself a little. Just the stuff that I’ve always wanted to say and never quite gathered my thoughts and found the time to talk about.
You’re gonna get to know me so well! This is like a mini autobiography!
First off, my mental health. This is something I don’t talk about much on this blog, mostly because it doesn’t need much talking about. I’m doing pretty well, to be honest. I have a smattering of anxiety and I’m maybe a little too introverted for my own good, but I’m not suffering from depression and the only time I ever even remotely considered suicide was when I just really really didn’t want to go to French class. COVID has been great for me, since I don’t have to see people. I suppose I’m not a great person to talk to if you’re struggling with depression or suicidal thoughts, seeing as I can’t personally relate, but I’m still always here for you guys if you need me. Just because I haven’t lived through your experiences doesn’t mean I can’t try to help.
Next up I want to talk about my sexuality. This one’s a bit of a mystery. For the past 16 years of my life I’ve considered myself 100% straight. But lately (let’s be honest, following the release of Spirit Blossom Thresh) I’ve been wondering if I might be bi. How many times can I joke about wanting to smash sexy boys before it’s not really a joke anymore? And if I am, a lot of things would suddenly make a lot of sense. But every time I think I have it figured out it suddenly feels like I have no clue what’s going on. Regardless, my sexuality has honestly never been a massive part of my identity (though I’m definitely not asexual, my friends can attest I’m far too horny for that). I have no clue if I’m bi and for now it’s kind of a fun little adventure!
I guess I’ll talk about school and stuff now. Believe it or not, I’m kinda smart. I’m taking a shitton of AP courses this year. But I simultaneously feel like it’s too much and not enough. I’m smart, but I’m not a great student. Compared to my dad, who graduated college with a 3.98 GPA (and his only B being in History of Canada as an American) and now has a super well-paying government STEM job that he loves, I feel like even if I work my ass off I’ll never quite measure up. And my parents have had super high expectations of me, and it’s only recently that they’ve started to accept that I might get some B’s here and there. I’m worried about all the homework this year. I’m a year ahead in Math but I don’t feel good enough at math to be taking AP calculus junior year. I’m worried I’m going to get like a C. But for the most part school is alright, too. That’s sort of the trend in my life. Everything’s alright.
Time to talk about my love life! I have no love life! I’ve been single for 17 years and probably stand no chance of changing that until at least college! Haha I’m so alone! But I can live with it. Growing up an only child with a few friends means that I’m pretty good at functioning without a ton of social interaction, and, while I’d like a partner someday, I’m not desperate. I can wait until I find someone. Pretty much my goal is not to die alone.
Onto sports maybe? I played soccer for most of my life, and was always the worst player on the select team. I was too good for the normal team and not good enough for the select team (kinda like math). Soccer was really toxic, especially when you’re the worst player on a team of high school jock drug addict boys. So I quit, and started playing frisbee! It’s a lot better. The people are nicer! But my first season never happened because of COVID and now I’m in my Junior year and haven’t played much frisbee! So I kinda suck! But I’m physically fit and that’s good enough for me! On my own time I bike and run to stay in shape.
Are you still with me? Now I’m gonna talk about my hobbies and things!
I’ve been playing video games for a long time. I kinda suck at them to be totally honest. I probably have below-average reaction time, and my parents only let me play 15 minutes a day for most of my childhood, so I have a lot less practice than most of my friends. I’m pretty slick with Swain in LoL tho.
This next part is borderline shameless self-promotion, but since the Kickstarter isn’t live yet I guess it doesn’t count. I’m making a tabletop role playing game! I’ve been working on it for the past few years. My goal is to launch the Kickstarter prior to my college applications, because that’ll look sexy as fuck to potential colleges. It’s a post-apocalyptic sci-fi game where you play as supersoldiers trying to reconquer the wastelands of Earth for humanity. I’ll do a big post on it when I launch the Kickstarter, and I guess that’ll also be a full name reveal (kinda spooky since my full name is ENTIRELY unique and one-of-a-kind. More ego boost lmao).
And finally I want to talk about my art and writing. I’ll start with my drawing, and finish off with my writing, since that’s what I’d most like to be known for on here (but that’ll never happen because my caveman brain shitposts are too funny).
So I’ve been doodling for a long time. I briefly got formal art training but sacrificing my Saturday mornings to draw what someone else wanted me to make so that I could make better stuff in the future didn’t appeal to my 8-year-old brain. I draw in the margins of worksheets. I draw on random sheets of paper. Recently my parents bought me a drawing tablet, and I’ve been trying to improve at digital art. I’d say I’m getting better, but I don’t practice nearly enough. All in all my art serves its purpose. It makes people laugh and can sometimes creep people out. It’ll never go in a museum, and I’ll never make money off of it but whatever.
And finally, my writing.
How can I talk about writing without talking about reading? I’ve likely read more books than both my parents combined, and if not, it’s close (and my mom is a prolific reader too). I have three bookshelves in my room and books on every surface. You can’t follow me for long without seeing a post ranting about my latest read. I love to read and I read incredibly fast. Reading spurred my love of English class, which in turn helped me write.
And finally, we get to writing in and of itself. I’ve been writing stories since I was a little kid. I’d like to think I’ve improved a fair bit. I’m still no novelist, but I consider myself a fairly adept short story writer.
But I suppose where my writing really stems from is my bed. Every night while I’m lying in bed, I tell myself stories until I fall asleep. I work on a story until it’s done or until I get bored of it. Along the way, in the shower, on my bike, I build the world of the story, crafting the plot. Sometimes the stories are elaborate fanfictions of my latest reads. That’s probably how they started. Often, they’re unique worlds all of their own. My current writing posts are about the City of Mammon, but my current story in my head is about some vampires who hunt other vampires in Victorian England.
And now we get into the process of writing. It’s fun! I sit myself down with an idea in my head, and use all the fancy words I picked up from my books to convey the vibes I want. I honestly wouldn’t be a great writing teacher. It’s just a skill that comes naturally to me as a result of what I’ve been doing with my free time my whole life. And it’s beautiful. And every time someone compliments my writing or reblogs it, I love writing just a little bit more.
Well I guess this is it. The 100 follower special. I wonder how many of you guys will take the time out of your day to read this. Hopefully a lot!
James (or That House) signing off for the night!
<3 thanks guys
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Milestones (Part One)
Jensen Ackles fanfiction is that, PURE FICTION. I do not mean any harm to him or his absolutely wonderful and adorable family. Do not Danneel hate or I will block your ass. That shit is not tolerated here.
Description: Your first date with Jensen Ackles went better than you could have ever hoped, leading to a long life with your favorite actor. 
Characters: Jensen Ackles, Reader, Hostess, Waitress
Relationship: Jensen Ackles x Reader
Warnings: Fluffy af. Jensen and Reader are cute, shy beans. 
Word Count: 1451
A/N: Okay, so this series is for @dean-winchesters-bacon. She won first place in one of my challenges 100 year ago and I’ve just been a big POS and haven’t worked on it until now. I’m excited to see what y’all think! Also, huge shoutout to @justawaywardwinchester for betaing and helping me write this! 
Taglist
Masterlist / Jensen Ackles Masterlist
You sat in your car, blasting the air conditioning as you tried to combat the nervous sweat that pooled in your armpits. You unlocked your phone and opened up Bumble, nervously tapping to your messages. He hadn’t messaged you, cancelling the date. Yet.
You rummaged through your purse for deodorant. You cursed at your nerves as you applied another thick layer. You threw it back in your purse as your phone chimed. You looked at your lock screen. Bumble: Jensen sent you a new message.
You tapped on the notification with butterflies in your stomach and unlocked your phone. Your messages seemed to take an eternity to load as you awaited the usual ‘Sorry, something came up’ message you’ve received so many times before.
You beamed as you read his message. I’m here and got us a table in the back.
You let out a long breath to calm your nerves before you turned your car off. You grabbed your purse and strode towards the restaurant with a newfound confidence. The hostess opened the door for you as she chirped, “Welcome to Sorge’s! How many seats will you need for tonight?”
You shyly smiled, “I’m actually meeting someone who’s already here.” You paused to clear your throat as your nerves tried bubbling up again, “His name is Jensen. Jensen Ackles.”
The hostess’ eyes went wide as she plastered a fake smile on her face, “Okay! Let me take you to him.”
You nodded as you gripped your purse strap tighter and followed her through the restaurant. Your jaw dropped as the waitress walked through a separate room in the back. You expected to be shoved in a back corner of the restaurant, not a separate room with a couple tables.
Jensen looked up from his phone when he heard the door open, shoving it in his suit jacket pocket as he stood with a smile. The hostess excused herself as Jensen walked towards you with open arms, “Y/N!” He enveloped you with his long, muscular arms, “You look amazing.”
You giggled as he pulled away and smoothed down your dress. “Thank you.” You looked him over: white tennis shoes, dark washed jeans, gray polo and a black suit jacket. “You look,” you trailed off as you eyed him once more, “more than amazing.”
He chuckled as he ushered you to sit down, “There’s no way I look better than you.” He pulled out your chair and pushed it in as you sat. He sat across from you and leaned forward, inching himself closer to you, “How has your day been?”
As you got lost in the emerald of his eyes, you thought ‘better now.’ But Jensen’s laugh made you realize you had said it aloud, causing you to blush brightly with humiliation.
“Well, I’m glad. Mine got better as I saw you walk through that door.” Your blush became deeper from his adulation, causing you to giggle. He rested his chin on a hand as he watched you with a large smile, “I like your laugh. It’s cute.”
You put your hands over your face, trying to hide the crimson that now adorned your cheeks. Jensen snickered at your reaction as a waitress walked into the room.
“Can I get you guys some drinks?”
You smiled towards her, “Can I get water with lemon?”
She nodded as she scribbled onto her notepad, “Of course!” She turned towards Jensen, “And you Mr. Ackles?”
“I’ll actually have the same.” The waitress nodded as she turned on her heel and walked out of the small dining room.
“So, tell me something that's not on your profile” Jensen asked, looking at you quizzically.
You were once again lost in his insanely green eyes and almost didn't hear him. You snapped back to reality and cleared your throat, “Hmm, what?”
Jensen grinned, “Tell me something about yourself. Something that’s not online.”
You blushed, yet again, as you tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear. “Oh, sorry.” You paused briefly, trying to come up with some unknown factoid of yourself. “Well, I'm kind of a singer,” you said slowly. It sounded so absurd saying it out loud. Telling Jensen Ackles that you sang was like telling Joe Montana you play football. You felt like such an amateur.
Jensen lit up, “Oh really? What's your favorite genre to sing?”
You were almost surprised he was actually interested. You figured he would laugh it off like you were another crazed fan, but you also forgot who you were talking to for a second. Jensen  would never be the type to demean someone, he's only ever supported others, especially those in the Supernatural Family.
“I sing a little bit of everything, but mostly blues and rock. Tennessee Whiskey is one of my all time favorites.” His tongue was peeking out between his teeth as his eyes lit up at your answer.
“Tennessee Whiskey, huh? I’ve sung that a couple times with Louden Swain. It’s one of my favorites.” He paused as the waitress came in with your drinks and took your orders. “Um,” he took a sip of water and wiped at his mouth quickly, “my all time favorite song to sing though is Simple Man.”
You smiled and looked down at your water. “I'm sorry but I have to gush…” You looked back up at him, afraid to annoy him. He was still smiling at you, so you continued. “Your cover of The Weight you all did on Jason's album was incredible”. Deep rose once again flooded your cheeks as you went back to staring at your water. You weren't sure if you crossed the line, seeming more like a fan looking for five minutes of fame than someone on a date looking for a meaningful relationship.
He gently placed his hand on your wrist, breaking your attention for your water and back on him. “I’m glad you liked that.” He chuckled as his thumb ran over your skin lightly, sending electricity through you. “You know, you don’t have to hide the fact that you’re a fan. I knew that already and it hasn't deterred me yet.”
You bit your lip, “I just don’t want to cross a line or anything.”
Jensen shook his head. “You aren’t crossing a line. We’re two people, on a date, looking for forever. It’s just,” he shrugged, “one of us happens to be famous,” he smirked.  
You gave him a warm smile and relief rushed through you.
The rest of the night, you and Jensen talked about everything under the sun. In the short period of time you had been with him, you felt more comfortable with him than people you’d known for years.
As the date winded to a close, Jensen walked you out to your car. He cleared his throat as you opened your driver’s side door and threw your purse into your passenger seat. “So,” you turned towards him, his hands rested in his jean pockets as he rocked back and forth slightly, “I had a great time tonight.” He looked down at his feet, “I was wondering if I could get your number though, to set up another date.”
You giggled and walked towards him, “Now you’re the nervous one?” Jensen looked up towards you with an apologetic smile. You held out your hand, causing Jensen to shoot you a confused look. “You can’t text me to set up another date if you don’t have my number.”
“Oh!” He fished his phone out of his suit jacket and handed it to you.
You smiled ear to ear as you typed your name and number into his contacts. You handed his phone back to him, “There.” You turned towards your car and grabbed your purse to fish out your phone, “You can text me right now so you know I didn’t give you the wrong number.”
For the first time during the night, Jensen was blushing as he tapped on his phone screen. Your phone chimed as Jensen put his back in his suit jacket. You opened your texts to a new message from a new number. Hey, it’s Jensen.
You smirked as you saved his number in your phone and then texted him back. Jensen who?
He pulled his phone out of his pocket and frowned at the message as you burst out laughing. “I’m sorry, I had to.” You wiped at a small tear that escaped from laughing, “But it’s me Jensen. I look forward to another date.”
He beamed as he wrapped you in the second embrace of the night, “That wasn’t funny you know.” He kissed the top of your head and stepped back, “But I look forward to another date as well.”
Tags:
Forever Tags:
@emoryhemsworth , @nanie5 , @gabrielslittleangel , @alexwinchester23 , @witch-of-letters , @caswinchester2000 , @justawaywardwinchester , @thehufflepuffblog , @missihart23 , @spnfamily-alwayskeepfighting, @team-free-gallagher, @rhiannonj79 , @curly-haired-disaster, @mogaruke, @supernaturalsammy01, @heyitscam99, @hobby27, @crazyrebelbitch87 , @frozenhuntress67, @duskany, 
Dean/Jensen x Reader Tags:
@xxtheoutsidersxx, @betsy-bradock, @adoptdontshoppets, @dean-winchesters-bacon
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prompt-and-circumstances · 6 years ago
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Pop Tart Heart
Pop Tart Heart
Characters/Pairings: No Pairings! Reader Insert, Original Characters, Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester
Prompt: Pop Tart Heart for the 2016 Louden Swain FanFic Project by @mrswhozeewhatsis!
Word Count: 2,273
Warning(s): Violence, Death, Teen Angst, Revenge, Gore?
A/N: My very first song-based piece of fan fiction for the very first Louden Swain Challenge. This is a reposting and there is a sequel.
Pop Tart Heart with a Side of Shotgun Shells
“They’re coming for us!”
You turned to stare, horrified, at Toby and the gang. Those things were breaking through. Deep down you knew, you couldn’t finish what you started. “Yeah, they’re coming for us. But guess what? We came for them too. I’m not leaving until this accursed job is done.” You turned to face the double doors, shotgun at the ready. As if on cue, a pack of broken-hearted dudes were knocking at your door. Toby emptied the gas can into the chainsaw and started her up; Chelsea strapped on her belt of aerosol containers she stole from her beauty school classes and held up one in a series of lighters. Maddox, determined to go out as any self-respecting nerd would, braced himself not far from Chelsea with a sword. You hadn’t really paid that much attention when he got it, but you thought he had said it was a replica from Game of Thorns or whatever the hell it was.
Chelsea shrieked, the dudes had created a hole in the door though thankfully it was not large enough for them to enter, yet. Hands reached through the hole, grasping for something. On the other side you could hear them singing some forgotten carol. The doors wouldn’t hold for much longer. Reciting to yourself that you had to finish what you started, your finger twitching above the trigger. A deafening sound came when the doors collapsed under the onslaught of the dudes; all dressed in the same apparel they rushed towards the lot of you.
Having grown up with four brothers in the sticks, you didn’t hesitate with that shotgun. You managed to blow away two heads before you had to start walking backwards with each shot. It was like smashing open a piñata but instead of candy, you won somebody else’s biological hard drive. Thank God your parents were not here to see this, they’d never let you hear the end of it. There was a downside to retreating backwards without looking though, as you quickly discovered when you fell. Shotgun almost flying out of your hands, you scrambled to get upright and in a shooting position again.
In those spare minutes you were open for attack, which a dude exploited. Grabbing your ankle, he twisted hard to get you onto your stomach, preventing you from getting off a shot in defense. His filthy nails dug into your flesh; the flesh of his hand was cold and slimy from perspiration, at least you hoped it was perspiration. You felt a solid thud against your back but it wasn’t followed by pain; turning to see what happened, the dude lay at your ankles. Blinking hard you noticed what was missing, his head. Standing above you and pulling you to your feet was Maddox. He nodded quickly, acknowledging your silent gratitude and then charged off after Chelsea with his sword. Note to self, never bully nerds again.
Toby looked like another person altogether, covered head to toe in guts and blood. His trusty chainsaw eating away at anything that tried to come near its master. Chelsea was actually surprisingly accurate with her homespun flamethrowers; she stood back-to-back with Maddox and they were cutting down the dudes like a well-oiled machine. They didn’t have to come with you on this mission, you planned on coming alone but they wouldn’t have any of that. Friends stand by each other, that’s what they said. How could you ask for more?
After an hour of grueling battle, the dudes lay on the floor in pieces if they were lucky, or mush if they weren’t lucky. Silently offering praise to whatever deity would listen, you took in the sight of your faithful companions. So far the only injury sustained was your ankle and you honestly have had worse. Chelsea stifled a sob as she looked at the singed dude laying inches from her feet. “Tha-that thing was Tommy!”
Tommy. Thomas Bandenberry. Leader of the Scholastic team and an up-and-coming track star. You all just assumed he’d get a track scholarship for college someday, but that day will never come now. You hadn’t thought of it until now but every last one of these dudes had a name, and you knew them all. You were all students at the same high school. Hell, you knew some of these dudes since grade school. That’s why they all had the same apparel, school uniforms. Twenty-five of your peers lay slaughtered before you and you wondered if feeling relieved made you a bad person.
Toby threw his arm around your shoulders, “Hey, let’s finish what you started once and for all.” Maddox gripped his sword tightly and voiced his agreement while Chelsea, still choking back tears, vigorously nodded her agreement. Resting your shotgun on your shoulder you stared at your friends, all of you in silent agreement. This ended now.
The four of you walked in silence back to the school, where this all began. You were bringing up the rear, lost in your thoughts. Last year, all twenty-five of those dudes died in a freak accident. It devastated the entire county; then two weeks ago they came back but they seemed to be missing something. You couldn’t quite place it, but for two weeks they got weirder and weirder. They were all athletic, all-American boys with healthy appetites but the more days that passed, the hungrier they became.
Tommy had been sitting in the bleachers just two days ago talking with you like you always had before the accident. You forgot that he was dead, or re-alive, or whatever the term was. All you remembered two days ago was that you had your best friend back. It was natural talking to him about everything. You had been doing that since you learned how to talk. You confided in him forty-eight hours ago; you told him of your nightmare.
I had a dream, that I ate your heart Tommy. It was toasted like a strawberry pop tart; all hot, and soft, and sweet. It took its place inside my belly and then my insides turned to jelly and your pop tart heart slowly began to beat.
He never said anything, just nodded as if he understood. And then the change came. Twenty-five hungry athletes turned on whoever was near them, and the dudes began to devour human flesh. You became convinced that it was your fault, that you had somehow flicked on an internal switch inside them. If you hadn’t told Tommy your dream, then he and his friends wouldn’t have become zombies, right? This was your fault, you started it and now you had to finish it.
You were jerked from your thoughts when you bumped into Chelsea. “Why’d you stop walking? We’re not to the school yet.” Chelsea didn’t answer, just stood there panic-stricken and shaking uncontrollably.
Following her gaze, you saw a mass of people previously dead now lumbering towards you. “What the hell?” Stepping in front of Chelsea, you’d be damned if you were going to let any of them get Tommy’s little sister, you raised your shotgun but didn’t pull the trigger. Walking in front of the mass with a ten-foot lead at least, was Colin Rottergut. Colin’s parents were from the Caribbean and he was a first-generation American. You didn’t recall him having that many friends, he was always talking about the weird creepy things they did on the islands. Voodoo and crap like that.
He sniggered at you, “Payback’s a bitch.”
“Payback? What are you paying us back for?” you demanded.
“Oh I’m not paying them back; they didn’t do anything. But you, you my little butterfly slighted me.”
To your left you could hear Toby growl in disgust. Colin must be referring to prom. He had asked you but you had to turn him down, Toby had already asked you a month in advance. Besides, it’d be weird not to go to prom with your boyfriend and with some other boy instead. “So, you’re paying me back by turning the cemetery into zombies? Don’t you think that’s a little overkill?”
“Hey baby, if there’s an itch you gotta scratch it. If there’s a will, there’s a way.”
Ah, now you remembered Colin! He was that guy that when he thought he was on a roll with something, kept going until he had beaten a dead horse. And tonight was apparently no different.
“You don’t debate, you gotta nab it. It don’t come for free, there’s a fee and you gotta pay it now!”
The mass of undead bodies ran toward you and your friends, but they didn’t get very far. Just three feet from you they all dropped. Colin furiously shrieked, ‘What did you do to my lovelies?”
Toby looked helplessly at you, Maddox just shrugged his shoulders. Chelsea wrapped her arms around you and hugged you so tight you thought your head would pop off from the pressure. You just look dumbfounded past Colin. Two men, two very tall men, walked up behind Colin. The shorter one had a strange gait, bow-legged but determined. Somehow he managed to keep up with the long strides of the taller one.
Catching up to Colin, the short one placed a bloody hand on his shoulder. “So you’re the little punk who caused this mess.” Colin started at the touch and Toby later mentioned he thought Colin was going to piss himself. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done Junior Mint?”
The tall one turned to look at the shorter one, “Dean!”
“What?”
“Dude, that was totally racist.”
“So? The kid just raised an entire frickin’ town!”
“Yeah, key word there Dean. Kid.”
Maddox literally raised his hand as if he were in class before clearing his throat and timidly piping up, “Um, excuse me, but who the hell are you guys? And what the hell just happened?”
The tall one stepped forward to address the four of you while the short one, Dean, kept a firm grip on Colin. You noticed Dean’s other hand was holding a gun held dangerously close to Colin’s ribcage.
“Hi, uh, my name’s Sam Winchester and this is my older brother Dean. We came to help with your zombie apocalypse here. You see, your sheriff is friends with someone we know, who also happens to be a sheriff. Our friend, Sheriff Mills told us about the goings-on in your town and sent us to help. I guess you could say we specialize in this kind of thing.”
Maddox had taken up the spokesman job for you guys, “Specialists? In zombies?”
Dean pushed Colin forward, “We’re hunters. We kill all the things that go bump in the night. Your little buddy here raised them with a voodoo spell. We mess up the spell, everybody drops permanently. Kapisch?”
You weighed in without thinking about it, “I thought it was my fault. I had a nightmare about eating hearts and told one of them about it. Shortly after that they started eating people.”
Sam patted your shoulder, “No, you didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, you were quite brave to stand up to them. You guys are armed to the teeth.”
Dean grunted at his brother, “What do I do with this one?”
Toby had an idea. “Why don’t we cuff him to Tommy and leave him there until morning? These two can make an anonymous phone call to the police and tip them off to Colin’s whereabouts, and let the cops sort it all out.”
Sam and Dean seemed to like that idea. You all marched back to the barn and it was kind of amusing to watch two “specialists” go green when they saw the place. “What the hell happened here?” they asked simultaneously.
Chelsea explained the whole thing to them. Dean looked like a proud Dad but Sam seemed sad to hear about your exploits, and you couldn’t have that. “Hey, don’t look so glum. They were coming for us and I thought I started this mess so I had to finish it. I grew up hunting deer and skinning them, I handled it. Besides, it was either kill them or be killed.”
“I know, but you’re just kids. You should be doing kid stuff, not blowing heads off of zombies.”
“We’re not kids, we’re seniors. Next year, we’ll be going to college. Now we know monsters are real so at least now we’ve had a taste of it and we won’t be caught off guard next time.”
“Next time? No way, promise me and Dean you guys won’t go looking for this stuff.”
Toby put his arm around your shoulders again and pulled you close, “she promises and so do the rest of us. We’re prepared now if they come for us, but we sure as hell aren’t going looking for it intentionally. Do you have any idea how hard this was? Tommy was Chelsea’s older brother. Can you imagine watching your brother die twice?”
Sam and Dean subtly exchanged knowing glances, you were fairly certain they did know. Maybe you could ask them about it next time you saw them, if you ever saw them again. They spent the rest of that night teaching you, Chelsea, Maddox, and Toby about hunters and hunting and made sure you were all alright. An hour before dawn they walked each one of you home, swearing each of you into secrecy.
That night, you dreamed about eating hearts that tasted like pop tarts. It wasn’t as scary this time now that you knew, no zombies were going to come from those dreams.
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mlovesstories · 7 years ago
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Adopting An Angel 9
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Summary:  YN gets to have some fun, but it may come at a cost.
Word Count <1800
Jensen, Danneel, YN, Jared
AN- I thought we needed some fluff. 
Release 7/17
“Hey, YN!”  Jensen facetimed his foster daughter.
“Hi, Jensen,” she grinned. “What do you need this time, huh?”
“WHAT?  What makes you think I need something?” He was very offended, jokingly.
“Because it’s midnight.” 
“I have a question, and you can totally say ‘no’.  I won’t be offended.”
“Okay then, no,”  she waited a beat with a serious face holding back laughter.
“Wait, what?  I haven’t even said anything!”
“I’m just kidding.  Go on,” she urged him to continue.
“You have Friday and Monday off, right?”
“Yes, sir.  Friday is a teacher work day, and Monday is a holiday. Why?”  Now YN was curious.
“We have a convention in Chicago.  Do you want to meet Jared and I there?”
“REALLY?  Wait.  Have you talked to the boss about this?” She couldn’t keep her giggles at bay this time.
“Dee is so not the boss.”
“She totally is, and you know it!”  YN teased.
“Okay, whatever, sassy.  Yes, we talked about it, and she’s fine with it.  Have you flown before?”
“I did one time, but it was when I was little.”
“Does flying scare you?”
“No, not really,” YN responded. “I’ve seen you do it enough, I think I’ll be okay.”
Oh, thank you, Lord. 
“Dee can go with you through security, but you’ll be traveling by yourself.  Is that okay?  Dee can take you to your gate.  All you have to do is board the plane. Can you do that?”
“Yes, sir.  Thank you, Jensen.  I can’t wait.”
“I’m sending you a package some AKF shirts so that you can wear the to the con.  We can even take another photo-op picture together again!”
“Jensen-”
“Yes?”
“The J2 photo is like five hundred dollars.  I can’t afford that.”
She thinks she has to pay. That didn’t even cross my mind. 
“You don’t have to pay, silly.  You’ll be on the VIP list.  No worries, YN.”
“Oh, wow,” she smiled.  “I’d love to do that.  I’d also love to get some sleep before school in the morning.  So if you don’t mind…”
“Right!  Forgot, sorry.  Good night, YN.  See you this weekend.”
“Goodnight, Jensen.”
___________
YN beamed as she walked down the stairs the next morning.  
“I take it he told you?” Danneel gave a sarcastic laugh.
“About the con?  Yes.  And he decided to facetime me at midnight.  I am very tired.”
“Why in the world did he do that?  He knows you have school.” 
“He forgot what time it was.  Weird shooting schedule yesterday, I guess.  Anyway, I can’t wait!  I get access to everything!”
“Awesome.  I’m sure you’ll have fun.  I gotta get you to school while Grandma is here to watch the babies.  You almost ready?”
“Yes, ma’am,” YN smiled.
_______________
“The package!”  YN said under her breath. 
YN text to Jensen:
Got the package.  
Jensen:
You’re awesome.
YN:
Very funny, Dean Winchester.
Jensen:
Confetti, it’s a parade!
YN:
I lost my shoe
Jensen:
Can I shoot her?  
YN:
Not in public.
Jensen:
I killed Hitler.
YN:
I hope your apple pie was freakin’ worth it!
Jensen:
I’ll man the flashlight.
YN:
Fight the fairies.
Jensen:
Are you drunk? (You better not be. Ever!)
YN:
You’re bossy and short.  
I could do this all day, Winchester. I’m putting my phone on silent so I can study.  We’ll battle later, squirrel.
Jensen:
I’m not short!  Fine!  You’re no fun! (See you tomorrow.)
____________
“Hey, sweetheart!  How are you?”  Jensen gave YN a hug when he met her by baggage claim.
“Hi, boys.  I’m good.”
“How was your flight?  You do okay?”  Jensen looked at her expectantly.
“Yes.  The landing was kinda scary though,” she said, embarrassed.
“Hey,” Jared called for her to look at him, “nobody likes the landing, darlin’.  Don’t you worry.  You ready to get out of here?”
“Let’s do this.” 
As they left the airport, a few fans of the show saw the trio and asked for a picture.  YN stood off to the side.
“You okay?  I know that must be weird for you.”
“Yes, I’m okay.  Can we go now?”
This is different.  He’s my foster parent. Jensen is just a guy.  I forgot he was famous.  Stupid YN.  What did you expect?  And we haven’t even gotten to the convention yet.  Great.  
“Earth to YN!”  Jared elbowed her in the van on the way to the hotel.
“Oh, sorry,” she apologized as she tried to cover up her worries with a smile.
________
The next day the fun started.  At least for YN.  Jensen and Jared rested so that they could attend the Saturday Night Special.  YN was very excited to explore all of the vendors and see a few of the panels, but there was a catch.  She had to have Clif near her for Jensen’s peace of mind.  Jensen knew this was a different experience for her.  Since he wasn’t going with her, he assigned Clif to watch over her.  
YN was able to meet all of the panelists and Louden Swain.  She couldn’t control her happiness.  There were a few times that she got carried away, almost leaving Clif behind.
“Hey!  YN!”  She heard Clif yell for her.  YN turned around.
“Yes?”
“Slow down.  I need to see you at all times.  I don’t want to deal with a moody Jensen because I lost his kid.  Got it?”
She heard whispers.
“Jensen has another kid?” 
“She’s a teenager.  Maybe she’s from an earlier relationship.”
“How come she’s been hidden?” 
“Who is her mom?” 
“Clif, take me to my room.  Now.  Get me out of here,”  YN spoke quickly.  
“Okay, YN.  Let’s go.”  He put his hand on the small of her back and guided her to Jensen’s room.
Jensen was surprised to see her back in the hotel room so quickly.
“What happened?” He knew something was wrong.  She was in a daze.  YN couldn’t process what had occured.
I can’t do this.  The fans will hate me.  Or hate the Ackles’.  I need to leave. 
YN stood up from a chair she had just planted herself in and started to walk out, face glazed over.  Jensen saw this and motioned for Clif to stop her since he closest to the door. Without speaking to her, Clif spun her around and walked her back to her bed where he position her to sit down.  
“I told her not to get too far ahead of me because ‘moody Jensen would be mad if I lost his kid’, but some fans heard me.  They started making comments, so she asked to come back here. I’m so sorry, Jay.  I should have-”
“Don’t worry, they would have seen you with her and wondered what was up anyway.”  Jensen turned to YN.  “I’m so sorry, YN.  I know this must be a lot for you-” Jensen started.
“Can I take a nap before SNS, please?  I can’t do this right now,” she tried to dismiss the conversation.
“Sure,” Jensen responded.  “Thanks, Clif.  I got it from here.”
After he made his exit, Jensen looked over at YN.
“Hey, YN.”  He waited for an answer, but he didn’t get one. She was completely spaced out. Instead of pushing her to respond, he stood up from his bed and walked over to hers.  She didn’t register that he was even trying to interact with her. Jensen took her by the shoulders and brought her to her feet.  When she was standing, he pulled the blankets back, had her sit back down, and untied her shoes.  “Don’t worry.  I got you.  Go to sleep.  We’ll deal with it later.”
____________
As YN woke up, she heard Jensen on the phone.
“... she’s practically a robot.  You should have seen the way she reacted.  Not the same kid… Yeah, I know.  Maybe we should have waited.  I mean, we can’t say anything to the fans, really.  She isn’t adopted.  We’d get in trouble with the state if we did say something. Yeah, okay.  I will. Love you.”
Danneel. 
YN rolled over toward Jensen’s voice.
“Hey, sleepyhead,” he said calmly with a smile.
“Hi.”
“Do you remember what happened?”  He knew this could go a few ways.
“Yes, sir.  I’m not yours.  It’s okay,” she stated with a groggy voice.  He walked over to her and took her hands in his. 
“Baby, you are ours.  It’s just that we can’t announce it. Legally you still are a ward of the state.  Look, if they ask about you at the panel, which they probably will, I’ll tell them that you are hanging out with us this weekend.  I would shout it from the rooftops that you are a part of our family, but legally I can’t.  Please understand that.”
“I know,” she shrugged, “but it still stinks.  I didn’t think this would happen.  Like ever.  You’re just a dude to me.  You aren’t ‘Jensen Ackles’.”
“Hopefully a cool dude,” he smirked.
“Anything but,” YN laughed loudly.
“HEY!”
“I’m kidding!”
—————-
Jensen knew that the fans would bring up the fact that YN was traveling with the boys. He was aware that some fans had seen him with her out at dinner and walking around.
“No to be too personal, but who is the girl that has been hanging with the two of you? Is she-?”
“She is a huge fan of the show.  She is a friend of the Padackles, so Jensen and I are treating her to a weekend of all-access fun. Please show her our SPN Family Values. Next question!” Jared was able to put their questions at bay to protect his sweet friend. Jensen was thankful. He knew Jared addressing it directly helped calm the waters a little bit.
Jensen whispered, “Thanks, buddy.”
“No problem,” Jared responded. “Go check on her backstage, I’ll stall,” he smiled.
Jensen wanted to reaffirm YN of her place in their lives. Yes, she was more familial, but they couldn’t say that. When he got backstage, she smiled.  
“How was that? Jared do okay?” Jensen was happy that she didn’t seem put off by Jared’s explanation.
“It was perfect, thank you,” she walked into his arms. “Go back out there! Tell Jared ‘thanks’ too.”
“I love you, YN. I mean it.”
“I know. Now go!”
Forever Friends:
.@katymacsupernatural  .@unicornblood4ever  .@ellie-andthemachine .@fangirl-moment-x  .@empirialwolf .@winchesters-favorite-girl  .@super100012  .@waywardnewcomer  .@percywinchester27  .@waywardsuns  .@supernatural-jackles  .@mcallmestiles .@mandyreese .@sdavid09  .@kingandrear  .@bellero @sleepylunarwolf
@rosie-winchester​​ @iliketowrite02​​​  @seality​​​​ @blogsnowflakeme​​ @jaycc7983​​ @luci-in-trenchcoats​​ @cherryblossom1997​ @because-you-never-know-when @lauren-novak @justsomerandomarchangel
Adopting An Angel Loves:
@fictional-characters-rule​
@internationalmusicteacher​ @deansgirl215
.@dramoine-winchester-mccall @vidashellymariae
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lucisfavoritedemon · 7 years ago
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Saturday Night Special
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Pairing: Jensen x reader
Summary: Y/N wants to do a song with Louden Swain, but the song she wants to do she also wants to sing with Jensen. What happens when he agrees, and will their undeniable chemistry show even on stage?
Warnings: Teeth rotting fluff, stage fright, anxiety, panic attack, angst
Word Count: 2553
A/N: Here is a very special of...drum roll please...DOUBLE LIFE!!!! I hope this gives those who miss the story a little bit of closure till the 12th of October. Sorry for the long hiatus, but I was just not feeling the story. Now I am excited to be picking it back up again, at least for a little while. This chapter is based on the song Dust to Dust by The Civil Wars. It is such a beautiful song (all of their songs are), but that song has inspired this. I really hope you enjoy!
Double Life Materlist
“Rob I was wondering if I could join the Saturday Night Special? I have a song I want to do and everything.” I texted the lead singer of the band Louden Swain, who just so happened to be the ones who are the headliners for the Saturday Night Special for the Supernatural Conventions.
“Yeah of course let’s get together and work on the song so we can do it in a few weeks if that’s okay with you?” he responded a few minutes later.
“Yeah I was going to talk to Jensen and see if he also wanted to do the song with me. If that’s okay with you?”
“Oh yeah totally. It’s your song and your time to shine so whatever you want to do is totally your call.”
“Okay cool. Thank you so much Rob you’re the best.”
“Yeah no problem.”
I went back to hanging out in my apartment, if Jess was in town we would be watching movies or clips of the show to get my mind off things. This last month has been nothing but me hanging on by a thread, and Jensen has been such a shoulder to lean on. He is such a great person, and the fact that I dragged him into this was eating me away.
How could I put a good man through such horrible suffering? It was my fault, but he is an amazing human being for worrying about me and not himself. We stay up and text or talk to each other for hours. One time I had an awful time trying to fall asleep a few weeks after Nathan showed up at the studio, so I decided to text Jensen, and we talked on the phone for almost five hours.
I was so lost in my thoughts I didn’t even hear that someone was now banging on my door. I jumped up and ran once I fully realised it wasn’t in my head.
“Hold on I’m coming, I’m coming.” I yelled hoping they could hear, but obviously not because they continued to bang on my door.
“Oh hi Jensen. I wasn’t expecting you this evening. I thought you were with Jared? Not that I’m complaining, but it is his birthday and I thought you would be with him.” I rambled only because I was nervous.
“Yeah well he wanted to get some sleep because tomorrow we leave for San Diego Comic Con. I wish you were going with us. I mean you still could if you wanted too.”
“No I made plans with my family this weekend. I haven’t seen them in a while, so I thought I’d pay them a visit.”
“That’ll be nice to see them then.”
“Yeah and then again in August because of Dencon. Oh, speaking of which I talked to Rob about joining the Saturday Night Special, and I was wondering if you wanted to do a duet with me?”
“Yeah of course. We could start work on it with Rob and his guys after we all get back.”
“That’s what I was thinking.”
We sat there in comfortable silence for about five minutes. Drinking in each other’s company while we had it for tomorrow we both would be on a plane headed in different directions. It will be hard not having him to talk to if I need to. It was going to be hard on both of us not just me, but it was, what it was, and I wasn’t going to tell him he couldn’t go for my benefit.
“Well I hope that you have fun visiting your parents this weekend. I should probably head home and get some rest so I’m not jet lagged tomorrow.”
“Yeah. Well have a good flight, and I hope you have an amazing weekend.”
I went to escort him out when he turned to me and kissed me. The kiss was short, but it felt amazing. Man I wish he would just ask me to be his girlfriend already just so we could do this all the time, and so it wouldn’t hurt when he would leave. Not knowing whether he was going to come back and still want me. This weekend would be the ultimate test to see if what I thought was real.
~*~
Today was the day we were going to rehearse the song I wanted to do with the band. I was excited because this would be the first day I would see Jensen since he left for SDCC. I haven’t even heard from him since the night he kissed me in the hallway of my apartment building.
“I’m here and ready to work on this thing. Where’s Jensen?” I asked looking and spotting everyone else.
“He said he couldn’t make it, but he did say he would practice really really hard for it to be ready for when you want to do it.” Rob answered
“Oh, okay as long as he has it learned and everything, which shouldn’t be hard for him, and it’s a pretty easy song.”
This just seemed off for Jensen though, when he commits he fully commits. For him to not show up to rehearsal meant one of two things; he was sick, or he had an emergency that needed his attention.  I just let it go, hopefully he’ll show for the next one.
~*~
It had been a few weeks and we were on our last rehearsal. Jensen had yet to show up to a rehearsal, and it was starting to worry me. I didn't doubt he could learn the song, but the harmonies can't just happen on stage. It takes practice, and Jensen has me a little worried with him not having shown up.
“Hey Y/N, ready to start?” Rob came up to me as I entered the room.
I looked around the room and saw all the band members, and even Rich had shown up. Still no Jensen.
“Um Rob?” he looked over to me acknowledging the fact I was speaking to him, “where’s Jensen?”
“I don’t know. Where is Jensen?” He asked the question back to me.
“I don’t know that’s why I’m asking you.” I said crossing my arms clearly irritated.
“Well I’ve got no clue where he could be.”
“Great. Anyone know where Jensen is?” I asked looking to the others, they all shook their heads. “Of course not. Well, since I have a really bad feeling he hasn’t even practiced, and we have a week till we perform it, Rob you’ll just have to perform the duet with me.”
“Sounds like a plan then.” Rob smiled and we went on with the rehearsal.
~*~
Jensen hadn’t spoken to me in weeks other than when we did lines together. I was hurting so bad because I knew how I felt, and I thought he felt the same way, but clearly I was wrong. I decided to talk to him the last day on set before the convention. I was just hoping he would be able to explain himself to me.
“Hi Jensen.” I was really timid and didn’t really know how to approach him.
“Oh hi.” He didn’t really react he just turned his head slightly to see who it was before going back to studying his script for the next scene.
“I wanted to ask you something, if you’ll answer it.”
“Shoot,” his eyes were still glued to the paper in his hands. It seemed like he was purposefully avoiding eye contact.
“Look I don’t know whether your mad at me, or what, but Rob was really excited for you to perform with them. So, where have you been when we’ve been rehearsing?”
“We had rehearsals?” He looked shocked, like the way a kid looks when you tell them Sanat or the Easter Bunny aren’t real.
“Yeah we had rehearsals every other week for three weeks.”
“Oh I guess I forgot.” He just shrugged and went back to reading.
“Fine whatever,” I sounded angry, but I was more disappointed. “Rob is taking your place just so you know. I’m sorry if I forced you into this I didn’t mean too. I’ll let you get back to studying your script.”
I walked away upset. I just knew he had to be mad at me. He didn’t deny it either which was the worst part. I felt like my world was crashing down on me. I’m never going to put my heart on the line again because every time I do someone tramples on it, and it’s always the person I least expect who does it.
My eyes stung with tears, and I was really regretting the decision to ask Jensen to join me. I felt disappointed again with the fact that I started to fall for someone who turned out to be a real jerk. I was so focused on my thoughts that I didn’t realise someone was calling my name.
“Y/N, hey what’s wrong? I’ve been trying to get your attention for a while now.” Jared said running up to me once I stopped and turned to notice him.
“Nothing important. It doesn’t even matter. It never mattered.” I practically whispered trying to hide the fact I was hurting, and the longer I thought about it the more it hurt.
“This isn’t nothing Y/N/N.  You are hurting and I just want to make sure that your ex hasn’t tried to make a reappearance back into your life.”
“No he hasn’t, and it really doesn’t matter Jar. Look I was stupid to trust someone, and they let me down. I learned my lesson with that.”
“What happened?”
“It doesn’t matter. All I know is I thought that there was something between us, and then there wasn’t, end of story.”
“Who do I have to hurt?”
“You would never hurt him. You would hurt me before you would ever hurt him.”
“Who is it?”
“Jensen okay. I counted on him to make a commitment, and he didn’t follow through with it. He stopped talking to me, and that was that.”
“He wouldn’t do that. Are you sure we’re talking about the same Jensen?”
“Yes, sadly. I fell head over heels in love with him, and I was stupid for doing so.”
“You were in love with him?”
“Yes, but sadly it doesn’t matter anymore I’m not trying anymore. I just want to give up on finding the right one for me.”
“Don’t say that. One day you might find the one for you.”
“Yeah, but for now I’m not looking anymore. I’m going to let him come to me”
“I hope that day comes soon. See you tomorrow.”
“See you tomorrow.”
~*~
It was performance time and I started to get a little stage fright. What if I screwed up the words? Or the harmonies? All these started to race through my head. I started to panic and I couldn’t breathe. Rich came up to me to make sure I was okay before we went on stage.
“Don’t worry it’ll all blow over once you step on stage. Just do what you’ve been doing at rehearsals and you’ll be totally fine.”
“Thanks Rich.” I started to calm down a little.
I was starting to gain my composure till Rich stepped on stage to announce that I was coming on stage.
“Our second to last song is one that all of you have been anticipating. They are the one and only Y/N L/N and Jensen Ackles performing Dust to Dust.”
Rich had it wrong. I wasn’t performing it with Jensen. It was just the band and I.
“You ready to show the audience what we’ve got?” Jensen said coming to stand beside me.
I decided not to respond, for I knew if I did, I would start crying. I couldn’t let him know I felt that way towards him. Despite the fact I was upset with him, I couldn’t help how my heart skipped a beat when he spoke to me.
We walked up on stage and the crowd erupted into cheers. I knew I could do this, I just didn’t have any faith in Jensen, but I had to give him the benefit of the doubt. We were handed microphones and Rob counted in before playing the opening chords.
It’s not your eyes
It’s not what you say
It’s not your laughter that gives you away
You’re just lonely
You’ve been lonely, too long
I started off slightly glancing at Jensen every now and again.
All your actin’
Your thin disguise
All your perfectly delivered lies
They don’t fool me
You’ve been lonely, too long.
The chorus was the part I was afraid of with the harmonies needing to match up perfectly. I just hoped that Jensen knew what he was doing.
Let me in the walls, you’ve built around
And we can light and burn it down
Let me hold your hand and dance ‘round and ‘round the flame
In front of us
Dust to
We looked glanced at each other once in a while, and I was relieved that the harmonies were perfect and I relaxed a little bit.
You’ve held your head up
You’ve fought the fight
You bear the scars
You’ve done your time
Listen to me
You’ve been lonely, too long
He looked at me the whole time, and it made me feel butterflies. I only hoped that the whole thing prior to this was an act. If not I would feel really stupid.
Let me in the walls you’ve built around
And we can light a match and burn them down
And let me hold your hand and dance ‘round and ‘round the flames
In front of us
Dust to dust
We were both facing each other, and I felt like we were the only two in the room, though I knew there were other people in the room.
You’re like a mirror, reflecting me
Jensen sang.
Takes one to know one, so take it from me
I sang back.
You’ve been lonely
You’ve been lonely, too long
This was the most magical moment of my life. I just kept staring into his eyes. They were the perfect shade of green and the most amazing thing I had ever seen. I was falling deeper and deeper in love with every verse.
We’ve been lonely
We’ve been lonely, too long.
We stood there for what seemed like hours but was mere seconds as the song ended. Each passing second we were getting closer and closer until our lips touched. Finally lighting the fireworks I knew that had to be there.
I could hear the crowd awning, but I was immersed in the moment I was sharing with Jensen. The man that I loved , and have for months now. Maybe even have since we met.
“I love you Jensen.” I finally confessed after we parted. I was grinning ear to ear with not a care in the world at that moment. It felt so good to finally say the word aloud.
“I love you too Y/N/N. I hated treating you the way I did and I’m so, so sorry for ever making you hurt like that. I will never ever hurt you like that again.”
This man was the what I never knew I needed, and it was the best thing in the world.
Double Life Tags:
@christiancoma-111 @nanie5
Forever Tags:
@anotherwaywardsister @atc74 @canadianspnhunter @deansdirtylittlesecretsblog @ericaprice2008 @impala-dreamer @impalaimagining @katymacsupernatural @leatherwhiskeycoffeeplaid @mamaredd123 @masksandtruths @mirandaaustin93 @muchamusedaboutnothing  @our-jensen-ackles-love @roxyspearing @sea040561 @snffbeebee @torn-and-frayed @winchesterprincessbride
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fanficcollection · 8 years ago
Text
Promotion Work (Part 4)
Promotion Work (series)
Part 1 Part 2  Part 3
Pairing: Rob Benedict x reader Summary: Driving home and Saturday morning
Word Count: 2100
Warnings: none i guess
Notes: I’m back! I just felt it would be right to come back with a nice, short chapter, I still hope you enjoy it. There will be more soon (hopefully). Until then, have fun with part 4!
You couldn’t forget how Rob looked at you, you nearly felt the touch of his fingertips on your cheek the whole ride home. A smile was tugged at your face when you got home and entered your flat, it was late already and you just wanted to take a shower before heading to bed, because you had to get up soon tomorrow. So you turned up the hot water and let it stream over your body, it felt good, your tensed muscles hurt a bit, but the warmth of the water did it’s part, after a short while it got better, a bit. You dried yourself, put on a cozy sleepshirt and put yourself into bed.
The next morning you woke up early, maybe you were nervous about seeing Rob again at the con today, maybe you were just hungry, you hadn’t eaten anything since yesterday at lunch. You looked for something in eatable in your kitchen, but except some dry muesli and a wrinkled apple you were out of food. Sure, you hadn’t got your money by now and you don’t had anything left. Normally you would have gone dumpster diving yesterday, you did it nearly every Friday, but as you were out of town yesterday you totally forgot about it. You had no other choice, so you put some water to the muesli and cut the apple into little pieces, and mixed it up a bit. It didn’t taste so bad, but it was too little to satisfy your hunger. You had to go home earlier today from the con to get some food for the rest of the week.
After that little breakfast you packed some things together, just in case you need to change as well today and then got into your car to drive to the convention center. As yesterday you went to the Gold-Pass-Entrance, but there was a different volunteer than yesterday, who, again, didn’t want to let you in. You told her multiple times, that Rich has personally invited you, but she stayed stubborn. Like the day before you decided to call Rich to get you at the entrance, you dialled and waited for him to pick up “Hmmm..” he just mumbled. “Hey Rich, it’s Y/N.” you smiled, he didn’t sound awake at all. “I’m here at the entrance and the volunteer won’t let me in to the con, like yesterday. Could you just…” you heard an undefinable noise “I’ll tell Rob to pick you up there, I’m not quite ready.” You giggled silently “Uhhm. Okay. I’ll wait here then.” You said. “Yeah.. mhmm. See you…then.” He mumbled again and ended the call. You didn’t expect Rob being more awake than Rich so you probably had to wait some time, you sat on a chair and observed how there got more and more people in the convention center. It was still early; the first panels wouldn’t start until in two hours or something like that. You took out your phone to check you social media pages while waiting, congratulated a friend of yours for her birthday and just read some news. Nothing really interesting happened since you checked the last time. You just read through an article as you heard somebody call your name, you instantly recognized the voice and looked in the direction, where it came from. Rob stood there, at the Gold-Pass-Entry, he looked tired as hell, but he shot you one of his incomparable million dollar smiles. Your stomach turned as you saw him and you quickly got up and went in his direction. “Good morning, sunshine” you smiled teasingly and hugged him. He hugged back and then talked to the volunteer to let you in. Like the one yesterday she was a bit embarrassed but let you in without hesitation. “We should get you a pass.” Rob said and yawned. You laughed “Had a long night yesterday?” you asked and he just nodded. “A long night and far too many drinks.” He explained and yawned again. “You up for some breakfast? I haven’t had anything today.” He asked you and you quickly thought about it. You couldn’t afford breakfast, not at a normal café and surely not at a convention center. “I had breakfast at home.” You said “but I’ll join you if you wanna get something.” He nodded again and showed you the breakfast room. There weren’t many people in it, everybody seemed tired and hung over. “You sure you want nothing?” Rob asked once more and you just shook your head “Not even some coffee? You must be up for ages…” you laughed silently and looked at the price tag, without anybody noticing. “Uhm… No. But thanks for asking.” You smiled and waited for him as he got himself breakfast. It was a big buffet and just at the look at it your stomach grumbled.  
You recognized some of the people you got to know yesterday, this one very young guy, Matt, looked like he would fall asleep during eating, the short-haired woman, Kim, you thought, stirred in her muesli, when she looked up she shot you a friendly smile. “Morning… You are the sound-technician from yesterday, uhhm…, Y/N, right?” she asked, her voice was low; you could tell they were out long yesterday.
“I am. I’ll help you guys with the sound system the whole weekend, so I’m afraid you will have me around a bit longer. “, you answered and smiled. “That’s fine with me, you seem like a nice person, but you should stay tonight, after the concert, you missed out the funniest part yesterday.” she told you and you nodded with a wide smile on your face. “Seems like everyone was out yesterday, that surely is a lot of fun, but I think I have to go home tonight as well, I think the hotel is fully booked.” You said and hoped this was true, you didn’t check that, but you were sure you couldn’t afford a room here, so you needed an excuse. Kim nodded “Maybe we will find a solution, I would bid you the couch in my room for a night, but I’m afraid it’s not very comfortable.” She said and laughed. “But I’m sure we’ll figure something out.”
Then Rob came back, he had a tablet with two cups of coffee, some fruit, two muffins and some other things on it. “Hi Kim” he greeted and put the tablet on the table next to her, then he turned to you ”I think you have to eat something with me, nobody can say no to a cup of coffee and a chocolate-chip-muffin with extra chocolate.” He smiled widely and placed the plate with a part of the things he got in front of you. “I…” you started to decline, but your stomach betrayed you “See, nobody can resist the charm of a chocolate-muffin.” Rob giggled and took a sip of his coffee. “Thank you.” You mumbled and took a bite of the muffin. It tasted delicious, you had to control yourself not to munch. “Wow! It tastes awesome.” You made to say and took another bite, you were totally focussed on the muffin, so you didn’t realise that Rob watched you. When you nearly finished eating you recognized his plate was still nearly untouched. You looked at him and your eyes met his for a second, he smiled and took a sip of his coffee “You sure you don’t want anything else for breakfast?” Rob asked. “You can take what you want” he shoved this tablet in your direction, you shook your head “That’s all yours. You haven’t had anything today and it will probably be a long, exhausting day, at least what I witnessed of a fan-convention.” You said and shoved the tablet back into his direction “I think I’ll stick with coffee and some toast with butter, I think it’s for the best at the moment.” He took a piece of toast and spread some butter on it “You sure?” you asked, he just nodded and took a bite. You didn’t want to look as hungry as you were, so you just took some pieces of fruit and ate them slowly. A few minutes you sat there quietly, focussed to not eat too much and too fast.
Suddenly someone covered your eyes from behind and you totally spilt your coffee all over your unfortunately white shirt. A voice behind you started to laugh. “Rich, stop it.” you said a bit annoyed when you recognized the voice. Rob quickly took the coffee cup from you to avoid that you empty the rest of the coffee. “Jesus! Rich? What’s wrong with you? Are you still drunk?” he said bugged.
When he realized what happened Rich stopped laughing, the hands which covered your eyes disappeared and you saw a pale, guilty looking face. “Sorry.” Rich said and tried to dry your shirt with some napkins. “Luckily the coffee wasn’t hot anymore.” Rich tried to apologize. “Yeah.” You said. “Good news, I don’t need a doctor, guys. I’m just looking like a Dalmatian dog.” You said, giggling a bit about your silly comparison. When Rich saw you weren’t mad he released his breath. “Indeed. But you have to train the puppy-eyes.” He said smiling. “But I think we can do something about that.” Rich added “And I think we have to prepare you for tonight’s concert as well, so it’s not that bad. Wait a minute, sugar. I’m right back.”
Confused you looked to Rob, he seemed to know what Richard was doing because he just smiled “I give that to him, it’s not a bad idea.” He just said to you and took another bite of his toast. “In fact I have some clothes in my car, I think I will just get them.” You said a bit unsure. Rob shook his head “You don’t need to, Rich will be back in just a minute.” He said an as he finished the familiar face entered the room again. He smirked as he saw your insecure glance. “Here you are, madam. A brand new Band-shirt from the best band at the convention.” He said and gave you a white shirt with some print on it, it was folded so you couldn’t see what was written on it, but instead of taking it you just shook your head. “I can’t take that.” You said. Rich just threw you a confused look. He didn’t know that you couldn’t afford a band-shirt and you didn’t want to tell him. You didn’t want to seem like you were just here for the money of these guys, because you weren’t, but they were actors, pretty famous actors, they surely would think that.
“Y/N…” Rob started “I know you don’t know Louden Swain that long, you probably know only the songs we played at your radio station.” His voice sounded a bit hurt “...but I would love to see you in a Louden Swain shirt, just one time, also we don’t have a lot of time left until the panels start and we… or actually you… have to do the sound-check and so on.” He said and took the shirt from Rich to give it to you again. “Please, Y/N… If you really can’t take it as a present you can give it back afterwards. Just-” He said looking on the floor.
“Wait..” you interrupted “as a present? You… you just wanna give that to me?” Rich pulled up his eyebrows. “Sure, what did you… Wait, did you think we just want to increase the sales?” he asked back. You shook your head “It was a misunderstanding, I guess, I would be honoured to wear your band-shirt, Rob” you said “just if the offer is still on the table, of course.” Rob and Rich exchanged a short glance and Rob nodded “Sure” he just said, but his voice was a bit insecure. “I think we have to head to the green rooms, we shouldn’t forget that there is work to do.” Rich said. “See you later, Y/N.” he added. You didn’t know if that was a question or a statement, but you answered “Sure. See you later.” Then you all got up, the guys went to the greenroom, where you were yesterday and you went to the sound machines to do the sound-check before the panels started. The atmosphere between you and the both of them were kinda awkward when you split up, you just could hope you didn’t break the friendship, which was between you three.
Tag-List:
@chantelle-c333 @awolfamongstus @jannalionheart @thing-you-do-with-that-thing @evyiione @destielschild @xx-melissa-x @kcam1621@captainsherlockwinchester110283 @crowley-you-sinnamon-roll @nekodresden85 @dont-hate-relate-pls @littleshone @laffytaffyhumor @waywardswain
I don’t know why, but tumblr doesn’t let me tag all of you, I’m sorry.  
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natasha-cole · 8 years ago
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Ready Steady Part 8
Summary: Rob returns to L.A. while the reader stays in Nashville for the remainder of her trip. Reader finds herself in a terrifying situation and believes that she only has one person to turn to.
Word Count: 3397
Warnings: a little bit of fluff, hints of past abuse, seriously guys… for some reason this turned out pretty dark. I’m sorry.
Note: For the sake of the remainder of the fic, I’m using some old Louden Swain songs and making them new ones. Also, as you can tell, my reader is a singer/songwriter and a country girl at heart… so for her, instead of trying to write my own lyrics, I’m using songs by Miranda Lambert and claiming them as the reader’s own. Hey, this way, you can listen to the actual songs after you read!
Catch up: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7
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When Monday morning came around, you found yourself in a poor mood. You had woken up to Rob draped over you again, which made you smile. He made you feel happy and safe. But your happiness washed away quickly when you remembered that it was Monday, which meant he was leaving today. You nestled up against him again while he continued to sleep, not wanting this moment to end. Your moment was cut short however; when Rob’s alarm went off, waking him.
“I’ve got to go pack,” he stated, rubbing his eyes. “I’ve been here so much that I’m not even ready to catch my flight yet.” With that, he got up and began dressing quickly.
You watched him from the bed, “I could get used to watching you scramble around my room looking for your clothes.”
“I could get used to it too,” he said as he winked at you.
“You sure you don’t wanna come back to bed, just for a little while?” You placed your hand on his spot next to you, rubbing circles in the sheets indicating that you wanted him back in bed.
“You know I do,” he sighed as he began to put his phone and wallet back into his pockets. “Meet me downstairs in 20? So I can say goodbye before I head to the airport?” He gave you a half-smile.
“Sure, I’ll meet you at the same place we met for the first time.” You grinned.
Rob let out a chuckle as he remembered your first meeting, “Ah, you’re so romantic.” He walked over to you and gave you a quick kiss before leaving again.
You found yourself at the hotel lobby before Rob had made it down, standing in the same spot that you had promised to meet him at. Sure, it was sort of corny; but if anyone could appreciate the sentiment, you knew it was Rob. You waited for some time before you saw some familiar faces enter the lobby.
“Hey guys!” you said cheerfully as Billy, Mike, and Stephen walked toward you. You hadn’t had a lot of time to talk to Rob’s friends over the weekend, but you had managed to talk music with these guys at one point. It had been a long and deep conversation. If nothing else, at least you had music in common with these men.
“Hey, Y/N, how are you?” Mike asked.
“I’m well. Just waiting for Rob.”
“Yeah, he’s been running late a lot this weekend,” Stephen added, smiling at you.
You laughed at the fact that you knew that you were the reason behind this. But you didn’t feel shy about it anymore. Sure, Rob’s friends still teased you endlessly; which always made you blush like crazy, but you were feeling a lot more comfortable around them now. The long conversations during their downtime in the greenroom had helped your anxiety about getting to know his friends a lot better. You had talked to these people so much that you sort of already felt like you fit into their little family somehow.
“Gonna go check out,” Stephen said as he headed to the front desk, Mike right behind him.
“Hey,” said Billy, who was still standing with you as his friends walked away, “I just wanted to let you know that Rob really is into you.”
“I know,” you said, “I’m pretty into him too.”
“Good, because… he’s a good guy. He’s had a rough go of it lately, but this weekend… it’s probably the best mood I’ve ever seen him in,” Billy assured you, “Hell, that was probably the best show we’ve done in years.”
You looked down at your shoes, a little embarrassed by Billy’s confession. You felt your heart swell a little bit at the fact that Rob had been in such a great mood because he had met you.
“I’m sure you guys are always great,” you argued.
“No, really. I think you’re good for him. He needs a good woman in his life.” You glanced up at Billy who was smiling warmly at you, “and, the rest of us really like you too.”
“Thanks,” was all you could manage in reply.
“Better go check out, see you around soon.” Billy said as he also headed for the front desk.
You smiled to yourself as he walked away. They were all so nice to you, something that you weren’t sure you really deserved. Yes, you and Rob had decided to see where this ‘thing’ between the two of you went, but it was not something set in stone. There was no name to it, no definition of what you were… but his friends seemed to have accepted you as one of theirs. This was something new to you. You didn’t have many friends, and the friends that you did have at one point were all but lost as you drove them away during your relationship with Chris. It had been easier to be alone at that time than it was to deal with his constant need to control you.
You were startled from your thoughts by a pair of hands snaking around your waist, which made you yelp.
“Didn’t mean to scare you,” Rob promised as you turned to meet him, you only wrapped your arms around his shoulders with a smile.
“It’s okay,” you said. You made sure to look into those gorgeous blue eyes for a little longer than usual. You were going to miss him. Your heart ached a bit, knowing that he was leaving and you would spend the next four days without him around.
“I’ll see you when you get back to L.A.?” he asked, pulling you in closer.
“You’ll be the first person I call,” you replied.
You brought your hands to his face, taking a moment to run your fingers across the patch of gray in his beard that you had found yourself becoming weirdly obsessed with. He smiled and you pulled his face to yours, meeting his lips in a deep kiss. It only made the ache in your chest grow. Four days. Four days you had known him. In those four days, you had found yourself falling in deep with this man. You found yourself feeling lonely when he wasn’t with you. It was crazy really, but now all you could think about was if you could get through four more days without him.
“I should go check out. The guys are waiting, I’m sure our car is here…” he trailed off. You could tell he was hesitant in leaving you.
“Go,” you insisted, “before I change my mind and make you stay.”
Rob smiled at you, giving you another kiss. As he started to walk away, he stopped in his tracks to rush back to you. “I forgot,” he spoke quickly, “I have something for you.” He started to rummage through one of his bags until he found what he was looking for.
He held out a book to you which you gladly accepted. It was a brown leather-bound journal. You opened it, flipping through its empty pages, not really understanding.
“I got this for myself a while ago, thinking I would need a new one soon… but I noticed that your notebook was almost filled. I thought you could use it while you’re here.”
You felt yourself smiling hard. You looked up at Rob, genuine appreciation in your eyes. It may not have been a fancy gift that was even meant for you in the first place, but the fact that he had noticed that you needed a new one really meant something to you. You loved that he paid attention to those little things and that he was willing to give up what was his so that you could keep doing what you did.
“It’s perfect,” you whispered, “thank you.”
Rob smiled at you again, leaning in for one more kiss. And in just moments, he was gone.
You stood in the same spot for some time, replaying everything in your head. The moment you glanced up from the ground and saw those blue eyes, running into him again at the bar, watching him on stage all weekend, meeting his friends, that first kiss, and the nights you spent together. Behind your smile, the ache was still there. Hopefully you could hold out for the next few days.
The next four days went slowly and rather painfully. You found yourself missing Rob more than you had thought you would. Your days were filled with writing. Eventually, you had needed a new notebook when your old one filled up quickly. You smiled to yourself every time you opened that leather-bound journal to write. You worked tirelessly on music. Some days, things flowed freely; other days, you grew frustrated and antsy. Your nights were lost in long phone conversations with Rob, who would call you in between working on various projects. You didn’t get to talk on the phone as often as you had thought you would. He was a busy man. But, when you did talk late at night, it was for hours at a time; just talking about everything and anything.
During the times that you just couldn’t sit and focus on music, you would huddle up in bed with your phone and watch ‘Supernatural’. You had started from season 1, even though you found out that Rob’s character didn’t even show up until season 4. Rob insisted that you watch from the beginning or you would be lost. You were overwhelmed when you found out that there were already 12 seasons of the show.
You also found yourself suddenly dodging phone calls and text messages from Chris. You hadn’t heard from him since Saturday, but by Monday evening, he was blowing up your phone. It was just like him to know the perfect moments to come along and try to ruin things. A few times, you had considered answering his calls. But thinking about Rob made you take a different route. You were constantly ignoring his calls. Unfortunately, the text messages were harder to avoid. Even when you’d see his name pop up on notifications, you couldn’t help but skim through what he was sending you. You really wished you hadn’t read them. They weren’t nice and often were so cruel, that you found yourself crying over them. Sometimes they were weirdly sweet, complimenting you on your looks; most times, they were threatening to point that it made your skin crawl. You never replied. You felt a little stronger knowing that you didn’t have to reply to him or answer his calls.
By Wednesday afternoon, you had become so adept in screening calls and text messages, that it felt like a bad habit. But you stood your ground, refusing to keep contact with him. That is, until one text message caught your attention…
Chris: I can’t wait to see you tomorrow. I’ll be waiting at home.
You felt your chest tighten at the words. You had told him to be gone before you returned home, but you should have known better. He lived there just as much as you did. He had a key, he could come and go as he pleased. In his moment of wanting you back, he wasn’t going to listen to you. You knew that he could very well still be at the house when you got home tomorrow. You felt nauseated suddenly at the thought. You felt yourself begin to panic, tears welling up at the thought of being face to face with him when you got home. Your first instinct was to call Rob, which you found yourself doing almost immediately after reading the text.
“Hey, Y/N,” came his voice on the other end. You let out a ragged breath when you heard him.
“Hey, Rob.”
“What’s up? What are you doing?” he asked cheerfully.
“N-nothing, I just… I just wanted to hear your voice.”
“Is everything okay?” he asked, pausing for a moment, “you sound upset.”
“I’m okay,” you thought about telling him everything. You thought about telling him about Chris and the phone calls. You thought about telling him about the possibility of Chris being at your house when you got home. You thought about telling him how afraid you were. In the end, you still didn’t want him to know about this part of your past… and your present apparently. “I just really needed to hear your voice.”
“Aw, I miss you too.” He sighed. “One more day though, right? We get to see each other tomorrow night.”
“Y-yeah,” you stuttered, still trying hard to hold back tears.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” he asked, you could almost see his brow raise as he questioned you.
“I’m just having a really rough day.” You choked out. You couldn’t hold back the tears anymore. You found yourself crying openly over the phone.
“Y/N, it’s okay,” he reassured you, “please don’t cry,” now he sounded upset.
You took in a deep breath, attempting to calm yourself. You hadn’t meant to make him worry, but hearing his voice sent you over the edge. Yes, you missed him terribly, but you knew you were going to see him soon. The real issue was that text. The gut feeling that you had that when you returned home, things could go really bad. However, you couldn’t bring yourself to tell Rob the truth. Not this time.
“I know,” you said, drying your eyes on the back of your hand, “I’m just being stupid. I’m sorry to bug you with this.”
“Never be sorry for bugging me,” he replied, “I like when you bug me.”
You laughed half-heartedly, sniffling a little.
“I’ll let you go,” you said softly, “I just wanted to hear your voice.”
“Call me again if you need to hear it more,” he insisted. You smiled. He really was the sweetest.
“Okay, bye. I’ll see you soon,” you said, you felt calmer just hearing him. And having him confirm that you would see each other soon helped a lot.
“see you soon, beautiful.”
You ended the call, letting out a loud sigh. He had made you feel better, but the message you had received lingered in your mind. Chris was pretending that nothing had happened, something that he did often. There were countless times when he would leave or the two of you would fight, and he would come back days later, pretending that all was well. He would become sickeningly sweet, buying you things, telling you that you were beautiful… and you fell for it every time. It was a vicious cycle that never ended with him. But, you knew that you were as much to blame considering you had always taken him back and forgiven him.
This time, you weren’t about to allow him to do this again. Especially now that you had Rob. So, with shaky hands, you found his number in your contacts and hesitantly pushed the call button.
Your heart raced, tears struggled to escape as the phone rang. You intended to be strong. You knew you had to be firm and insist that it really was over and that he needed to leave. When he answered the phone, all of your bravery disappeared. You found yourself turning back into that broken girl who couldn’t stand up to him.
“Y/N, I thought you’d never call me back. I can’t wait to see you tomorrow.” Chris’ voice came through, sounding too cheerful. Your stomach turned at the words. “Y/N? Baby, are you there?”
“Don’t call me that,” you whispered. Your voice was gone, as it often was when you spoke to him. You wondered what had happened to the girl who stood up to him just days ago. Perhaps you felt less brave knowing that he was possibly waiting at your house for you.
“Why are you being like this, Y/N?” He kept his voice tender and sweet. You had to remind yourself that this is what he did. This is what he always did. It was his way of making you feel like the crazy one.
“I-I told you to leave me alone,” you stuttered.
“Why would I leave you alone? I’m here, at home… just waiting until I get to see you tomorrow.” You closed your eyes and flinched at this revelation. He really was doing this, and you had to make it stop.
“You need to leave my house,” you felt some of your bravery returning. It wasn’t much, but you felt safer on the end of a phone call, “I want you to get your things and leave.”
He was silent for a moment, “why would you say that?”
“Are you kidding me?” you spat out, “you left, and I am done now. I already told you I was done.”
He was quiet again, this time for a lot longer.
“Did you hear me?” you asked, feeling anxious now, “I want you to leave and never contact me again.”
More silence. You choked on the tears you were holding back. Beginning to cry as he remained silent. Covering your mouth to stifle the sobs, Chris took that as his cue.
“I’m not going anywhere,” his voice was no longer kind, it had turned threatening very quickly.
“Please,” you cried, “please just leave me alone.”
You could almost hear him grinning over the phone, “good, you’re frightened. I’ll just see you when you get back tomorrow.” The line went dead as he hung up.
You dropped your phone; sinking down onto the floor of your hotel room, as you sobbed into your hands. He was serious. You also knew him well enough that things were quickly going back to how they had been months ago. Fear raced through your body. At least at this point, you had a number of choices. You could return to your home, where you knew he was waiting for you, and see what would happen. A large part of you knew that this would not go in your favor. This would also mean that you would continue to avoid telling Rob the whole truth. Another option was to get law enforcement involved. Say that you feared for your safety, send them to your home, and risk that information getting out into the public. Now, you weren’t famous by any means; but your name was one that people would notice if it ended up in police reports. Your other option was to confess everything to Rob, and hope that he would help you.
Your head began to hurt. You thought mainly about your relationship with Rob. Your ran your options through your head repeatedly, weighing the pros and cons of each one. Given your history with Chris, going home when you knew he was there was no longer an option. You had to rule that one out, especially when just thinking about the possibilities of what could happen filled you with so much fear that you felt like you couldn’t breathe. Involving the police was a stretch for you. You weren’t sure why you even considered it. Word would get out and everyone would know that you were a victim. Who knows what that could do to your career?
You were left with one option. Tell Rob and hope that he could help. Of course, this too came with its own pros and cons. You wondered if he could continue this with you if he knew the truth, the truth that you had been keeping from him. You also took into consideration that you had known each other for almost a week, and this was some really heavy stuff to confide in someone with. Your fear of losing Rob over something like this ate at you. How could he continue to care about you if he found out how damaged you were?
Sitting for hours, thinking things through, and unable to decide between your options; you began to feel defeated. It was almost as if your choice was meant to be impossible. And then, you remembered that you might have had one other option. There might be one other person who could help you. You didn’t want to call her. God knows, you wanted to avoid this conversation with her at all costs.
Ultimately, your fear and your confusion won. You picked up your phone, searching through until you found her number.
Tag List: @tas898, @wolfyangel-is-a-pluviophile, @narisjournal-blog, @dont-hate-relate-pls, @waywardswain, @nerdyforyourbooks, @perksofbeingafangirl26, @crowley-you-sinnamon-roll, @pepperwoodatnight, @idk-fandom, @please-stop-killing-dean, @b-northington, @sclerafantrash, @itsilvermorny, @jannalionheart, @feelmyroarrrr, @capital-eyyyy-ohhh, @prlncess-nuala, @nekodresden85, @thebookisbtr, @internationalfandomgirl,​ @smoothdogsgirl, @chantelle-c333. @emilywells19 @laffytaffyhumor @lucifersxvessel @thefelinemedia78 @onlyanothersocialcasualty @typicalweirdbookworm @littleshone
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fanficcollection · 8 years ago
Text
Promotion Work (Part 1)
Promotion Work (Series)
Pairing: Rob Benedict x reader Summary: you start working at a radio station and your first day a more or less famous band is there promoting their new album Word Count: 2340 Warnings: none at the moment
Notes: I don’t know how this happened, I just started writing and this came to exist, it isn’t special at the moment, maybe it will get better with the next parts. Whether or not there are some parts to come :)
It was the last day of the semester. The last day before your holiday, which you would spend with working to earn some money. Since you moved out from home when you started to go to university you struggled with making a living. Always lived from the cheapest food, sometimes going dumpster diving but it was your greatest wish to get a better job than your parents, in fact they were unemployed the last couple of years and never did anything to get a new job, they always lived on your cost, when you were living at home. One more reason to leave them, first it was hard, but here you are, in your third semester.
You got a summer job at a little local radio station, the pay was okay and you liked the job although you had to do all the work that nobody else wanted to do. You liked everything that had to do with music, you as well were writing your own songs, sometimes you played them at an open mic evening at a bar, but you never thought about more. You just needed them as a kind of therapy to process the things in your life.
After having a few drinks at your friends flat you decided to head home to freshen up before the barbecue, which was planned this evening. It was just midday so you had enough time to dig through your closet looking for a nice thing to wear to the party. After some time you setteled on a light summer dress with some pastel blue flower print on it, it was second hand, but it still looked nice. When you prepared doing some simple make up for the evening your phone rang. You glanced at the display and didn’t recognize the number.
“Hello?” you asked.
“Good afternoon, is there Y/F/N Y/L/N?” the female voice said.
“Uhm, yes, who’s calling?” you wanted to know.
“It’s Cloe Finley from Radio One studios, Y/N, I know your summer job starts not until tomorrow, but I wanted to ask if you are free today.”
“Uhh.. actually..” you started but got interrupted by the caller,
“It’s because there is a band coming in today and unfortunately there was an emergency so we need a little backup here. Can you be here in about half an hour?”
“What do you-“ you heard someone yell at the background: “Cloe, you got someone? Hurry up, we need you over here.”
“Just a minute, Liv.” Cloe yelled back “So, Y/N? Is it possible for you to get here? Of course you’ll get paid for it.” You thought about it for a second, then you nodded and told the caller “I’m coming.”  You heard a relieved sigh on the other end of the line.
“Thanks so much! See you!” she ended the call and you started to text your friends.
You: *Hey, there is an emergency at my summer job, have to go there. I’ll come over later. Start without me! :)*
You pressed SEND and after that you gripped your bag and headed off to the radio station.
20 minutes later you arrived at your working place, no plan what lied ahead of you. In exactly the moment you opened the door a stressed out woman came into the lobby. “Ahh. Y/N, I guess. Nice to see you, I’m Cloe, we talked on the phone.” She introduced herself. “Thanks for coming so quickly. So, I’ll tell you what’s happening today and then we all have hurry to get things ready” she started, without letting you say a word and pulled you into the recording room “The band, I don’t know if you have ever heard from it, it’s called Louden Swain” a bit overwhelmed by the situation you shook your head “no problem, they aren’t that famous, they’ll arrive in in about half an hour to promote their new album. Liv will do the interview and I’ll be stuck here to do the technic stuff, but we need someone to take care of them, like welcoming them, show them the way to the recording room, get them some drinks and so on. That will be your job. I’ll give you a short tour through the house so you know, what you have to know, the most important thing is to just stay friendly.” You stared at her, she was sweating, was completely rattled but although seemed to have everything under control. “Sure thing.” You said and followed her as she started to show you around.
Time went by and when you got back from the short tour she headed back to the computer “You’ll do great.” She said when she closed the door behind herself. There were about ten minutes left until the band would be here, you checked the fridge if there were enough cool drinks and once again thought about the tasks Cloe has given to you.
When the little coach drove into a parking lot you put on a smile and went to the entrance 5 guys got out of the coach, they seemed to have a lot of fun. They talked to each other while taking some instruments out of the trunk, not recognizing that you were there, then they were coming up to the studio entrance and when they spotted you they threw you a big smile. “Hey, I’m Y/N, I work here at Radio One.” You introduced yourself with a shy smile, you were not exactly sure how to welcome a band. One guy, who was wearing a grey polo shirt and a hat started talking “Nice to meet you, Y/N, we’re Louden Swain, this are Billy, Michael, Stephen and I’m Rob” I nodded and tried to learn the names, then you realized that there was another guy left “And you are?” you asked friendly “Oh, Rob forgot about me, again.” He rolled his eyes playfully and then picked up your question “Anyways, I’m Richard; you can call me Rich, if you want. I’m not part of the band; I’m just a friend of Rob.” He answered.
“Okay, then welcome to Radio One, come in.” You held the door open so they could get into the building. “It’s just a little, regional Station but in relation to the size we got a lot of listeners” you repeated the things Cloe told you before. You showed them around and eventually leaded them to the recording room where Cloe and Liz were doing the program. With a hand-sign Liz told you to wait outside. “I guess we just have to wait a few minutes longer.” You told them, getting a bit nervous. “Uh.. F—I completely forgot to ask you… D-do you want something to drink?” you could hit yourself for that. They drove here, most likely a long time and you forgot to get them a drink. “Sure, I think some water would be great. What do you say, guys?” they nodded. “Okay. I’ll get you something, the fridge is downstairs. Just… just wait here a minute, okay?” Rob again gave you a wide smile “Yeah, but take your time, we won’t die of thirst.” You stared a moment in his bright blue eyes, before you could force yourself to look down and nod, how could someone have eyes like this, eyes in which you can drown within a second. “Sure.” You told them and left to get the water. When you came back they were gone. You looked around and spotted them in the recording room. Silently you opened the door and got in the room, you didn’t want to miss the interview with the first band you met.
When Liz recognized you coming in she stared at you angrily “What are you doing in here? You’re lucky we don’t have the mics turned on at the moment” she scolded, you lowered your head, didn’t know what to say, you knew you weren’t allowed to go in the recording room without an explicit invitation. “I-I’m s-“ you started when Rob helped you out “She got us something to drink, she was very considerate.” He got up and came around to take one of the water-bottles from you. “Thank you for thinking out for us.” He said and winked at you. Again you got lost in his bright-blue eyes, he looked back for a while until he turned back to Liz. “So can we start?” he asked and Liz looked back to Cloe. “I’m sorry, normally I’m not the technician, it isn’t working. “ she confessed while looking at some displays and pressing some buttons. Liz rolled annoyed with her eyes “I’m so sorry guys, good stuff is hard to find.” Liz pressed out annoyed. You gave the water bottles to the other guys and went back to Cloe, at university you worked on the campus radio for a while. You observed what Cloe did when you felt watched, you looked up to see Rob quickly turn away but Rich still staring at you. You gave him a shy smile and concentrated at the displays again. “Try to turn on this one and turn off these two.” You whispered to Cloe, she stared at you disbelieving but she didn’t know what to do instead so she tried. Suddenly there was some movement on one of the displays. “The mics are working now, but we aren’t airing. To go on air you have to turn this one on.” You explained silently and smiled at her.
“Guys, Liz, we are ready to air.” Cloe said and glanced at you thankfully. “Okay, then let’s start.” Liz commanded. “We are live in 5, 4, 3, 2 –“ she counted and pressed the said button.
I sat back there and watched the interview, they talked about their new album, their tour and some kind of conventions, you didn’t know anything about. Then they played a song from their new album, you were amazed by them, after that Liz said her goodbyes and the guys as well thanked the audience and then they were out. You made sure Cloe turned the mics off and then got back to the band and Liz.
A few minutes later the band left the recording room, you led them down to a room with some couches and tables. “There is the fridge, take what you want.” You told them and sat down on a couch in the corner of the room. You didn’t know how long you had to stay, but probably at least until the band left, but you didn’t mind, they were nice. Rob and Rich took some soda and sat down next to you. “So, how long do you work here? You can handle the tech like you did it for years.” Rich commented. “In fact I’ll start tomorrow.” You smiled. “But thanks, I got some experience with the campus radio.” You told them. “I just work here for a summer job, then I’ll go back to university.” Rob and Rich nodded with an understanding expression on their face. “That sounds nice. What are you studying there? Is it something with music or media, you seem quite interested?” Rob asked honestly interested. “Yeah, it’s something like management and business in media” you said and turned around when you heard a door behind you, you could see Cloe coming in the room. “Would you excuse me for a moment? I’ll be right back.” You told the two men and walked up to Cloe. She gave you a warm smile, thanked you for being here and said you could go home when the band was gone, they can do the rest of the day alone. “See you tomorrow then.” You said and watched her leave the room before you got back to Rob and Rich.
“So you are free now?” Rich said and smirked. “I am.” You replied, curious what he meant with that question. “Would you mind joining us for some drinks?” he asked then, still smirking. You looked at him and then turned your eyes to Rob, who watched your reaction. If you didn’t know it better you would think his body tensed up a bit. Mind running you checked the time on your mobile, it wasn’t late, you could easily go to the barbecue with your friends now or you could go with this guys you just met a few hours ago and have some drinks. Again you looked at them, again drowning in the depth of Robs blue eyes, in that moment you made your decision “Okay then, do you have any plan where to go?” you agreed and smiled.
They took you to a near bar and you had some beers with them, it was fun to get to know them, Rich was the funniest person you had ever met, from times to times you couldn’t breathe from laughing. Rob on the other side seemed a little shyer, he glanced at you and from time to time you caught yourself staring at him. He seemed a bit more secretive than Rich, but you laughed it when he laughed and often you felt yourself blush when he gave you one of his shining smiles.
When you checked the time again you had to realize it was late, as funny as the evening was, you had to go home to get enough sleep because you had to work tomorrow.  You took the last bit of your beer and stood up, from one moment to the other everything spun around you, and you felt a hand on your arm to steady you. “Everything okay?” Robs voice said next to your ear and you nodded. “I think I’ll take a taxi.” You said while your vision cleared up a bit. “Okay, get home safe, Y/N, it was nice to meet you.” He told you lightly touching your arm before he let go of you. “Yeah.. You as well. Tonight was fun.” You giggled and waved them goodbye, then you stumbled out of the bar.
Part 2
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