#I DONT CARE ABOUT THE WAY MY BODY CONTORTS WHEN I JUST FALL ASLEEP

[charbeloved]

missed my classes today after doing something IVE DONE MY ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE [sleep harder after falling back asleep in the mornings]

guess who has to go to bed at 8:30 PM rather than 1am BECAUSE SHE MISSED ONE FUCKING DAY OF FUCKING ONLINE SCHOOL

[rottenshigaraki]

Round Four - drabble

Dabi x reader

Word count: 833

Cw: finger fuckin, soft ooc Dabi, blood mentioned at the end (not readers)

The word pussy,cunt,hole,and clit are used. However no pronouns are used

Reblogs > Likes

You've been playing for what seemed like hours now, laying on Dabis bed, using the wall and a flat pillow to prop yourself up.

You held your game system in hand and on your stomach for so long that you can feel your left arm falling asleep. However, you couldn't care in the slightest, your mind has been else where. Your eyes glued to the screen while your thoughts of him and what he had left occupied your mind.

Warm and slowly dripping onto your panties. you cant help but to focus in on it,

Dabi had fucked you earlier that day but your body couldn't help but crave more. Though after the third round, it was so painfully over stimulated that you cried with the softest of touches.

You two had stopped there and went on about your day. He had missions to do while you had the day off.

So here you are soaking through your second pair of panties, alone in his room.

"I could smell you from across the room."

You dart your eyes up to be face to faced with the devil himself.

Gasping out of shock and pleasure as he sneaks his hand rubs at your slit. "does baby need this?" Pressing pressure onto your clit with a lazy smirk.

Shaking your head ,"Hhhn no! I dont want that."

"No?"

You paused to think of how to phrase this without sounding dumb.

"Whaddya want then baby?" He purred, rubbing his cheek against yours, kissing your ear.

"I-I need my holes filled."

He pulled back and stared at you in shocks for a second before smirking.

A warm hand squeezed your cheeks, pulling you in for a kiss right as his other hot hand smack your cunt.

"Ffffu-aH!" You shrieked

"That was so fuckin hot, thought you were gonna say something stupid like penetration." He breathed into you, lips just barely touching

"Was gonna," you chuckled "had to think for a second."

His hot hand slides its way down your pants as he licks your lips, mimicking your as you moan.

"Fuuck" he laughs "You're seriously wet. You want this so badly huh? Greedy for round four baby?"

You nod feverishly, gripping onto his shoulders as he teases around your hole.

"Dabi, Dabi pleee-ase~!" Whining the last bit as he sunk three fingers in.

"Dont break them now." he smirks, fingering you open, not that you really need it.

Closing your eyes you thought,

'Not enough,more god please more.'

Bucking your hips up ,his fingers hitting your G,

"Ga-ah! Do-don’t be mean."

Feeling his smile against your temple he rapidly picks up his pace. Quickly fuckin his fingers in and out of your wet cunt, his palm slamming against your sore clit.

Youre whining and moaning his name tagged with praises

The perverted sounds your slicked hole and his evenly slicked hand echos in the room, deafening your own voice

"You wanna cum whore?"

"No!" You gasp out "not yet!"

"Why torture yourself baby," he whispers against your ear. "Your wet ass fuck hole says otherwise."

He was right, your gripping him so tightly youre shocked his pace hasnt faltered. Youre high was fastly approaching.

He clicks his tongue, calling you as if you were a cat.

"Hhhnnnnn~." you whined in defiance, opening your eyes to see Dabi eagerly staring at you, his lips stretched into a toothy smile.

"I wanna en-enjoy you a bit long-ger~" Still his pace didnt slow.

"Cum for me baby, come on."

Too close to really convince him you nod rapidly. Grabbing his hair you pulled him down, muffling your screams with his tongue as your orgasm explodes throughout you. Intense sparks ripple up your chest and arms, going all the way down to your toes which caused your legs to squeeze around his stilled arm.

Only letting you two breathe once youve finally come down, you shaking legs released his arm.

Dazed out of your fucking mind you look up at your boyfriend, smilingly a toothy smile down at you. His eyes had nothing but awe and love in them. It was so out of the ordinary to see his face contort in such a happy way, always so jaded and hiding behind a façade.

Such a beautiful sight.

A goofy smile spread across your face with a giggle. "Beautiful." You softly spoke.

"Hmm sorry what was that?" You teased, leaning in closer.

"Youre beautiful." You said louder, nimble fingers scratched at his head.

"My fingers really did a number on you huh? Youre so fucked out, speakin random shit."

You shook your head. "I love your face. I love your happy grin, I love the way your eyes crease and when you do, i love your laugh lines, I looove you~" You sung out the last bit.

Dabis brows furrowed, his face more solemn. "yeah?" He whispered as blood dripped out of his scarred skin.

"Yeah." You confirmed as you wipe the blood away. "I do." You gently bring yourself up to lick the the rest.

Minors, blogs w no age, and empty blogs will be BLOCKED

[chocopalustre]

yoosung x mc,,,,, do i title this? idk sflsdjfh basically yoosung comes home to find MC self harming

a little-ish ficlet thing i wrote um! i love yoosung with all my heart

please be warned that it contains graphic depictions of self-harm/blood and general depressive themes! i wrote this for my own personal reasons, so please bear that in mind and be considerate. but i thought that i would share it here for others in hopes that it may be of some small comfort for u,,

You woke up feeling stifled and groggily pulled your eyelids open before staring at the ceiling blankly. You blinked some of the sleep from your eyes and stilled, listening for movement throughout the house. You were unable to detect any noise, and the thought simultaneously comforted you and filled you with a sense of loneliness. Yoosung must have gone out.

Your hand slid underneath the pillow, reaching for your phone to check the time- 11:49 AM. You’d been asleep for nearly 12 hours. You blinked owlishly again and noticed the text from your boyfriend.

Yoosung: morning babe!!! i went 2 the store to pick up sum things and run errands! dont worry about me, ill see u soon♥

You let the hand holding your phone fall limply back onto the bed. Some days were like this, you didn’t know why. Sometimes the thought of getting out of bed was unbearable. Each day this week, it had been more and more difficult to pry yourself from the warm sheets, but it wasn’t because you didn’t want to leave Yoosung’s arms. No, you just couldn’t move. You couldn’t will yourself to get up. You remembered waking up several times as the morning passed, the warmth of him surrounding you. It usually comforted you, but lately that feeling had been getting smaller.

You turned on your side and sighed, staring at the dark screen of your phone, not really seeing.

It’s all so hard. Why is it so hard?

Your mind started to drift, and you felt yourself falling deeper into that wicked hole that you knew you wouldn’t be able to pull yourself out of. But this, this was comfortable. Familiar. The darkness was a feeling you were well accustomed to. It wasn’t like you were particularly sad about anything. Nothing had happened, no specific event that triggered your fall. Your body just felt… heavy. Numb.

Empty.

Your thoughts shifted to the hidden razor blades in the very back of your closet. It was all so easy. So simple. Everything was set up. The you who had last used them knew that the time would come again, eventually. Two days, two weeks, two months, it didn’t matter. Inevitably it would happen again. You ran a cold finger over the puckered lines on your thigh. Suddenly, a brief twinge of fear, of guilt, shot through you as you thought of the other night.

Yoosung had pulled your body as close to his as he could get, trailing kisses along your body, lower and lower. His movements stilled for only a second when he reached your right hip. Your breathing hitched as he placed one tender kiss on the first scar, then another, and another. He always did that. Treated them so delicately with care and love flowing from each soft kiss. Most days you didn’t mind the scars; in fact, you rarely cared enough to hide them. The pain that accompanied their origins was simply just another fact of life. But the way he treated them so gingerly, the way his eyes shined a little brighter than usual when he glanced up from the collection of faded white and purple-ish lines at you…

You closed your eyes, as if doing so would erase the image in your mind.

It isn’t fair to him. Why am I like this?

Your thoughts began to spiral, your mind in turmoil as your body lay perfectly still on the bed.

This is my fault. It’s my fault and it hurts so much and all I do is let him down. But what can I do? What can I do when it all just hurts so much?

Most of the time you didn’t have enough energy to act when you felt this way. Today though, today was different. You felt your body lift and your legs swing off the side of the bed. You padded toward the closet, feeling numb but determined. You dug through to the back of the closet, making a concerted effort to be quiet even though nobody else was in the house. The metal glinted in the dim light of the closet as you inspected the razor blade between your fingers. This was all you had, this was all you could do.

I deserve it.

Your footsteps were slow as you walked to the bathroom, heavy with anticipation. You sat on the edge of the tub, still staring at the blade in your hands. “Why don’t I feel anything?” you whispered aloud. Your gaze shifted to the old scars on your thigh, and you let out a small, mirthful smile at the thought that you conveniently wouldn’t have to remove any clothing for this.

Suddenly, you were overwhelmed with a sense of urgency. Your breathing quickened but your hand barely trembled as you pressed into the soft flesh of your thigh, relishing in the sting as you dragged the blade across a spot just above your most visible scar. It didn’t matter. It didn’t matter if people saw. All that mattered was what came next.

Slowly, you lifted the blade from your skin, listlessly watching the droplets of red bead up before beginning their descent. That was your favorite part. Watching the blood seep out and feeling the slight tickle as it trickled down your thigh before blip blip it dropped onto the tiled floor. You watched in fascination, pressing a finger to the trail and smearing it a little.

Again.

The next few cuts were shallower; the first cut, you found, was always the deepest. It was driven by raw, urgent emotion, and you had less control over it than the subsequent cuts. Two, then three, then four… You paused, watching the slower process of the blood bubbling up, waiting for it to move. You let out a deep sigh, closing your eyes before turning them to the ceiling.

Why can’t I cry?

You didn’t feel particularly better. In fact, you didn’t feel anything at all. The tiny sliver of relief you felt at the first cut had faded, and now you were just continuing mindlessly. Why weren’t you crying? You let out a quiet huff and turned your attention back to your marked thigh. The blood was already starting to congeal.

Again.

And so you did.

So engrossed in your work you were that when the sudden slam of the front door shutting echoed upstairs, you jolted and accidentally pushed the blade in deeper than intended. “Ah-” you hissed out, blinking rapidly. Only then did your hands begin to shake, the grip of your fingers now feeble and slippery with blood.

Yoosung.

You heard him call out your name happily, wondering if you had gotten up yet. How could he sound so excited? He was going to find you like this, a mess, and you were going to take all of that joy away. After some shuffling and the opening and closing of cupboards, you heard the quick romp of his footsteps up the stairs. But you were too numb, too shocked to move, to do anything. The door was wide open and there was no hiding what you had done.

“MC?” his voice called out softly.

No. No no no.

“Honey, are you up? Where are you?” his voice took on an increasingly worried tone, and you began to feel nauseous. And then, there he was. Standing in front of the bathroom door. Processing. His hands, his soft, warm hands, the hands that treated you so kindly and with so much love, began to tremble, and he began to shake his head almost imperceptibly.  “MC? MC no, oh god. Oh god-!”

Immediately his arms were around you, careful enough not to disturb the bloody mess that was now your thigh. He was shaking, but you were still. “Oh, MC, w-what did you do? Fuck. Oh, fuck.”

It was only then that you began to cry. The tears built up and spilled over, dripping onto Yoosung’s pale skin, and your body began to contort with sobs. “D-don’t! Just leave, Yoosung!” you cried out, though not making any movement to push him away. You felt so sick, so embarrassed and enraged that he was seeing you like this. That you made him see this.

“Never, I’d never leave you, MC. Oh god, honey…” He shushed you, attempting to breathe deeply as he rubbed your back, your arms, your unmarred thigh, trying to calm you down. You stayed like this for god knows how long, Yoosung occasionally tightening his grip around you as you heard him let out a couple of sniffles.

You took in a shaky breath, the mucus in your throat making it difficult to speak. “Yoosung, don’t cry. It’s ok. It’s fine. It’s fine.”

I fucked up.

He let out an ironic, broken chuckle before stifling it with a soft sob. “Why am I the one being comforted right now? MC…” He gave you another tight squeeze before slowly pulling back to look at you. You felt his teary eyes on you, you could feel his gaze burning into the fresh cuts on your thigh, but you couldn’t bring yourself to look at him.

I fucked up.

His hands moved to cup your cheeks, and he began wiping away your tears that were now slowing. “Stay here, honey. I’m going to… I’m gonna clean you up.” Another deep sigh was heard, and you saw his legs move to stand, reaching for supplies in the glass cabinet above the sink. “Antibiotic ointment… a washcloth… bandages…” he mumbled quietly to himself as he shuffled things around. Various bottles clinked against each other, and Yoosung cursed quietly as a few objects fell against the porcelain. Then there was the sound of water running as he dampened the cloth and rung it out.

Finally, he was kneeling before you again. He attempted to brush some of your hair away from your tear-stained face. “MC, please. Look at me.”

You slowly forced yourself to look up, and immediately new tears welled up in your eyes, blurring your vision as you began to sob again. “I fucked up. I fucked up, Yoosung. I’m a fuck-up.” The words spilled out ruthlessly, the pain and regret and disgust falling from your lips. You gasped out, choking on your breath, your fingers clenched tightly around Yoosung’s shirt. It was damp with your tears and smeared with your blood, and all you could do was grip it tighter.

“No, please-” He diligently stroked his thumb back and forth across your wet cheeks. His next words filled you up with even more self-loathing, if that was at all possible. “I’m not upset with you, MC. You’re gonna be okay, honey.”

How did he know you so well? How could you betray him, his warmth, his trust, like this?

“I don’t deserve you…” you mumbled quietly, hoping he wouldn’t hear.

“MC, I love you. Please, please don’t say that. You are everything to me. I-” He had to stop himself from sniffling again, taking a deep breath. He pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead, smoothing your hair before turning his attention to the damp washcloth in his hand. “Tell me if it hurts, okay?”

You gave him a barely visible nod, watching his hands that carefully set to work wiping away the dried blood on your leg before applying pressure to the cuts to quell the bleeding. You sat together like that, the air hushed and heavy with both of your pain. He was so gentle with you, almost as if he was afraid he would break you; of course, that didn’t stop his medical diligence. He carefully spread some Neosporin on the fresh wounds after most of the bleeding had stopped and placed a bandage over the raw skin.

“Yoosung.” His gaze immediately flitted toward your face, attentive. “I’m sorry.”

You mentally told yourself to relax your grip on his clothes, trying to keep from erupting into more sobs. Yoosung pulled you back into his arms, his cinnamon and honey scent finally making you feel safe again. His fluffy hair tickled your cheeks, and you closed your now-swollen and puffy eyes.

“You have nothing to be sorry about, MC. It’s alright, I’m here for you.” He peppered feather-light kisses across your face, trailing to your neck, your shoulders. “You’re safe, you’re okay. And I love you, MC.” He rested his nose against your neck, murmuring gentle reassurances against your skin. “I just wish you could see yourself the way that I see you. Bright and lovely and inspiring and worth so much in this world. You saved me, MC. I wish you could see…”

He gradually rocked you back and forth, interspersing the movement with soft kisses along your skin every now and then. Periodically he would murmur that he loved you, or that you were safe, or he would soothe your worries and promise that he wasn’t mad at you. Eventually, you fell asleep in his embrace, the stinging on your thighs dulling with each slow inhale of Yoosung’s cozy scent.

-

It was always Yoosung who reached into the abyss and grabbed ahold of your hand. He was the one who helped you scrabble out of the stifling darkness, even though it pained him to see you so broken and lost every time. He was there when you felt like you could barely breathe, and he was there rubbing warmth back into your chilled and numb body.

Yoosung shifted slightly to scoop you up into his arms, careful not to wake you as he carried you to the bed. He gently laid you down, covering the both of you with fluffy blankets before maneuvering so that your head rested on his chest. He rubbed your arms, occasionally letting his touch move towards the bandage on your thigh, blinking up at the ceiling.

“You’re going to be okay.”

[broooklynshere-blog]

ohmygodohmygodokayso- 49. Why does it hurt so much? and 78. I can’t…I can’t lose you. with Jackcrutchie if you dont mind! (hit me with that aNGST if you dont mind mydude!!!)

[I am still working my way through the prompts, I promise if you sent one I will get to it! My homework load is light tomorrow so I will be able to get a lot of writing done. I hope this is angsty enough for you anon ;) also this ended up being like ten pages, I don’t know how.]

49. Why does it hurt so much?

78. I can’t…I can’t lose you.

Jack didn’t get sick. Hewas always the one taking care of everyone, making sure that if someone wassick they got what they needed and had enough money to stay in the lodginghouse if they couldn’t sell. He was so strong, seemingly invincible. Until hesuddenly wasn’t.

It happened so quickly.One day, Jack was fine. He was laughing and cracking jokes with the rest ofthem, completely normal. The next day, he wasn’t able to get out of bed. Heinsisted he was alright, it was just a little bug. He would stay back one dayand be back to normal soon enough. Crutchie wanted to stay with him, he reallydid, but Jack insisted he go ahead. He hurried back as soon as he was doneselling, taking up residence by Jack’s bed.

“Crutch, I’m fine.” Jackinsisted as Crutchie wiped his forehead gently with a cool towel. His skin wasfeverish, damp with sweat. “You don’t gotta fuss over me.”

Crutchie shook his head. “Iain’t fussin’. I’m takin’ care of you.” He brushed Jack’s hair out of his eyesand ran his fingers through it gently, smiling slightly when Jack leaned intothe touch. “Just relax. You’s gonna be fine.” He couldn’t quite get rid of theball of anxiety that had collected in his stomach that morning when Jack saidhe wasn’t feeling well.

Jack nodded, his eyesslipping shut. “Best I’ve felt all day.” He mumbled, relaxing back against thebed. “Thanks, Crutch.”

Crutchie blushedslightly, bringing the cloth up again to wipe Jack’s skin again. “Sleep. You’llbe good as new tomorrow.”

When Crutchie woke up, hegroaned at the stiffness in his body. He glanced around, realizing it was morning. He had fallen asleepsitting up, his front half draped over Jack’s bed. He felt a dampness andlooked at the bedding. It was drenched in sweat, as was Jack’s entire body. Theblanket was twisted around Jack’s figure, his face contorted in discomfort.Crutchie slowly sat up, the slight movement made Jack groan and shift around.Race wandered over, his eyes widening slightly when he saw Jack’s condition.

“Crutch, you better stayback today too.” Race stood next to Crutchie, his face concerned. “I can coverya for tonight and the other fellas can help cover Jack.”

Crutchie normally wouldhave said no, he was capable of taking care of himself. But he was not going toleave Jack’s side. “Yeah, thanks Race. Can one of you get Katherine? She might know what to do.”

Race nodded and squeezedCrutchie’s shoulder, then filed out of the room. Crutchie went and got some waterfor Jack, wetting the cloth again. He wasn’t experienced with taking care ofsick people, he was usually the one sick. He sat beside Jack and pulled theblanket off of him, draping it over one of the other beds to try and air itout. It was another hour before Jack woke up. His eyes slid open and he whinedslightly, curling his fingers around Crutchie’s wrist.

Crutchie used his freehand to grab the cup of water. He pressed it to Jack’s lips and helped himdrink, a little of the liquid spilling down Jack’s chin. He set the cup downand felt Jack squeeze his wrist. “Jackie, how’re you feelin’?”

Jack tried to sit up,falling back down onto the mattress after a few seconds. “Never…better…” Hemumbled, attempting to rise again.

Crutchie placed his handson Jack’s shoulders, gently pressing him down. “Hey, none of that.” He workedto keep his voice even. “You’ve gotta rest, alright? Are you hungry?”

Jack shook his headquickly, grabbing his stomach. His face tightened. “Crutch…” He leaned over andvomited, most of it getting on himself. Crutchie winced. He stroked Jack’s hairas his friend heaved, gasping and choking. Jack leaned back once he was done,his expression ashamed. “Fuck, I’m sorry.”

Crutchie got to his feet.“Don’t worry. Come on, you need to take a bath. It’ll do ya good.” He helpedJack to his feet, supporting most of his friend’s weight. They stood there fora few seconds, Crutchie wondering how they would make it to the washroom with hisleg and Jack unable to support himself. It took them a while, but theyeventually made it. Crutchie ran the bath, making sure the water was lukewarm.He helped Jack undress, tossing his soiled clothes to the side. He gentlylowered Jack into the tub, trying to keep from looking at Jack’s more…intimateareas. He left the room once Jack was in, working on cleaning up the vomit onJack’s bed. Once he was done he went back to the washroom, sitting beside Jack.

Jack smiled slightly atCrutchie, appearing a little bit more relaxed. “Thanks, Crutch.” His voice washoarse, but stronger than when he woke up. He took Crutchie’s hand, squeezingit gently.

Crutchie smiled andsqueezed back. “Don’t mention it. How’re you feelin’? Is the bath good?”

Jack shrugged slightly. “I’ve felt worse. The bath is nice, it’d be better if you joined me.” He winked atCrutchie and laughed, then winced. He closed his eyes and leaned his head backagainst the tub.

Crutchie rolled his eyesfondly, trying to contain his blush. Jack was always saying things like that,to everyone. It was no big deal. He rubbed Jack’s arm gently. “Maybe when you’rebetter.” He joked back.

Jack opened his eyes, asoft smile on his face. “I’ll take you up on that.”

Crutchie shook his head. “Don’tyou think about that, focus on gettin’ well.”

Jack nodded, closing hiseyes again. “Yes sir.”

They were silent for awhile, Crutchie was almost certain Jack had fallen asleep. Crutchie let hisconcern show then, his brow furrowing as he stared at Jack. The ball of worryin his stomach had grown exponentially. Jack was worse, much worse than the daybefore. Crutchie didn’t know what to do. He needed to talk to Katherine, shehad gotten a doctor for Albert when he was sick. Maybe she could get the sameone to look at Jack. They had to do something. There had been boys who hadgotten sick in the lodging house, some of them had even-

“Your face is goin’ toget stuck like that.”

Jack’s voice brokethrough Crutchie’s thoughts. He blinked and looked down, trying to arrange hisfeatures into a neutral expression. “What’re you talkin’ about?”

Jack sighed. “Crutchie, I’mgonna be fine. I promise. Would I let you down?”

Crutchie bit his lip. “Jack…”

“No, stop it.” Jack tookhis hand again. “I know what you’s thinkin’. I’s gonna be fine.”

Crutchie took a deepbreath and nodded. He stood and grabbed a towel for Jack, helping him out ofthe tub. He averted his eyes again as Jack dried off, then helped him back tobed. “You should just stay undressed. I think it’s better, with the fever andall.” He draped the blanket over Jack.

Jack nodded. The journeyfrom the bathroom seemed to have tired him out. “Think you just wanna keep menaked.” He mumbled, already drifting off to sleep.

Crutchie sighed. Jackslept for a remainder of the day. Katherine stopped by that evening and toldCrutchie her doctor would be by the next morning to look at Jack. She gave hima few dollars, which he tried to refuse. She gave him a look, then left withoutanother word. He was slightly relieved though. It was enough money to cover afew days at the lodging house, which meant he didn’t need to go out and sell. Jack wokeup after Katherine left. He managed to get down a little bread and water beforepromptly falling back asleep.

Jack’s conditioned hadworsened the next morning. He woke up on and off, his eyes glassy. Crutchietried to get him to eat and drink when he was awake. The doctor showed uparound noon. The expression on his face told Crutchie all he needed to know.

“The biggest concernright now is keeping his fever down. Make sure you’re keeping him cool. When hewakes up, he needs to eat and drink. This flu is hitting lots of people aroundthe city right now, this is the third case I’ve seen this week.” The doctorsighed, snapping his briefcase closed. “Just try and keep him comfortable. He’sgoing to be disoriented when he wakes up, so he shouldn’t be alone. I’ll comeback tomorrow to check in on him. Miss Plumber knows how to reach me if hiscondition worsens.”

“Alright, thanks Doc.”Crutchie slowly sank into the chair next to Jack’s bed, trying to stay calm. Hewould be okay. It was treatable. He grabbed the cloth from the basin he had setbeside Jack’s bed and gently pressed it against his cheek, his hand shaking.

Jack’s eyes slid open,looking around frantically before locking with Crutchie’s. “Charlie?” His voicewas barely above a whisper, more innocent than Crutchie had ever heard it.

The use of his real namestarted Crutchie. He forced down the lump in his throat and nodded. “I’m here,Jackie.”

Jack let out a quietwhimper, screwing his eyes shut. “Hurts.” He mumbled, curling up on themattress. “Why does it hurt so much?”

Crutchie let out a shakybreath. “It hurts because you’re real sick Jack. But the doctor was here and hesaid we just gotta keep your fever down.” He set the cloth aside. “I need youto drink some water, alright?”

Jack shook his head. “Can’t,Charlie.”

Crutchie pressed the cupagainst Jack’s lips. “Please? For me, Jackie?”

Jack didn’t move for afew seconds, before slowly opening his lips to accept the drink. He managed afew sips before falling back asleep again.

The next morning rolledaround, the fourth day of Jack’s illness. Jack didn’t wake up. Crutchie triedeverything, but only got a few mumbled words of nonsense. His eyes neveropened. The red flush of his cheeks had disappeared, turning to ghostly white.

The doctor’s face wasgrim as he checked Jack over. “You need to start preparing for the worst.” Hetold Crutchie quietly. “If he doesn’t wake up tomorrow…I’m afraid there’snothing I can do.” He placed a hand on Crutchie’s shoulder and squeezed gently,before walking out.

Crutchie practicallycollapsed, his upper body draped on Jack’s bed. Sobs shook his body. “Jack…Jackie…wakeup…” He cried, desperate. “You have to wake up, Jackie. You just have to. I can't…Ican’t lose you.” He whimpered and took Jack’s hand, pressing it to his owncheek. “I’ve got so much I still gotta tell you, Jack, so many things I gottasay. I love you. I’m in love with you, Jack. You’s gotta wake up so I can tellya.” He stayed like that for hours, tears streaming down his face onto the bed.He fell asleep at one point, waking up when he felt a hand shaking hisshoulder.

Race stared down at him,his face blank. “Go get some sleep, Crutch. Real sleep, in a bed. I’ll sit withhim.”

Crutchie shook his head. “No,no. I’s fine.” He ran a hand over his face, knowing how swollen it must havelooked.

“You need to rest. Youain’t doin’ Jack any good, I think you’s had about six hours of sleep the pastcouple days.” Race replied.

Crutchie shook his headagain, more vigorously. “I can’t leave, Race. What if he…?” He couldn’t finishthe sentence.

“If anythin’ changes, I’llget ya. Come on, up.” Race got Crutchie to his feet and gently nudged himtowards a bed on the other side of the room. Crutchie laid down on themattress, certain he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep. He was out in minutes.

The next morning,Crutchie felt hands shaking him. He groaned and tried to slap them away,pressing his face into the pillow.

“Crutchie, get the hellup. It’s Jack.” Romeo’s voice broke through the fog of sleep and he sat up,grabbing his crutch and pulling himself to his feet.

“What’s goin’ on? Is hegone?” The panic that gripped Crutchie was debilitating, he could hardlybreathe. Jack was dead, gone, he had died without Crutchie by his side.

“No, he’s awake.” Romeosmiled widely, excited to deliver the good news. “Come on!”

Crutchie followed Romeoto the other side of the room, moving as fast as he could. He saw Davey andRace standing at the end of Jack’s bed, the doctor examining Jack. His eyeslanded on the only person he really wanted to see. Jack was sitting, his backpropped up against some pillows. He was smiling weakly, his eyes more alertthan Crutchie had seen them in days. He noticed Crutchie and his smilebrightened.

The doctor got to hisfeet. “You’re quite a fighter, Mr. Kelly. A couple more days of rest and Iexpect you’ll make a full recovery. Of course, some credit goes to your friendthere. He gestured to Crutchie, who was standing next to Davey. “He took goodcare of you.”

Jack nodded, affectionclear on his face as he stared at Crutchie. “Yeah, I know. Thanks, Doc.”

The doctor shook Jack’shand, then left the room. The other boys quietly walked away, giving Crutchieand Jack their space. Crutchie stood there, silently drinking in Jack’sappearance.  A bit of the color hadreturned to his cheeks and he wasn’t coated in sweat. His eyes were bright,full of warmth as he looked at Crutchie.

“Well, are you gonna juststand there?” Jack grinned at Crutchie, a soft laugh escaping his lips.

Crutchie slowly sat downon the edge of Jack’s bed, reaching out on instinct to take his hand. Heblushed as he realized his mistake. Jack wasn’t sick, he didn’t need thecomfort of Crutchie’s hand in his anymore. He tried to retract but Jack heldon, interlocking their fingers. “Crutchie…thank you. I didn’t think I was thatsick, I’s so sorry I scared ya like that.”

Crutchie was still for amoment, before yanking his hand out of Jack’s grip and throwing his arms aroundJack’s neck. He hugged him tightly, careful not to jostle him too much. He feltJack’s arm lock around his waist. Tears welled in his eyes, he didn’t even tryto stop them. “Jack, I-I…”

“Shh.” Jack soothed,pulling Crutchie closer to him. “It’s okay. I ain’t goin’ anywhere, I promise.”

Crutchie pressed his faceinto Jack’s neck, the true reality of what had happened sinking in. He hadalmost lost Jack. “I was so scared, Jack. I thought you were going to die, Ithought I’d never get to tell you…” He trailed off.

Jack pulled away, holdingCrutchie’s shoulders. He brought one hand up and wiped the tears off Crutchie’scheeks. “Tell me what?”

“Nothing. It ain’timportant.” Crutchie looked down, his cheeks turning slightly pink.

Jack tilted his chin up.Crutchie stared into his eyes, biting down on his lip nervously. “Jack…” Hebrought his hands up and twisted them in the material of Jack’s shirt. Jackpulled Crutchie closer, sliding his hands down to rest on top of Crutchie’s.Crutchie could feel Jack’s heartbeat, strong and steady. It was solid proofthat Jack was okay, he was going to be just fine. It was that thought thatpushed Crutchie to lean in, pressing their lips together.

Jack was still for amoment, then kissed back firmly. He slipped his arms around Crutchie’s waist,gripping him tightly. They broke apart after a few moments, Jack breathingheavily. He laid back down against the bed. He was still recovering, after all,he needed to rest. He pulled Crutchie with him.

“I could hear, Crutchie.I…I heard ya. All that stuff you said.” Jack whispered. “I love you too. Alwayshave, probably always will.”

Crutchie smiled softlybut didn’t reply. He rested his head against Jack’s chest, one ear directlyover his heart so he could hear the steady rhythm. There would be days, weeks,in which they could talk or kiss or do whatever they wanted. There was no need to rush. Jackwasn’t going anywhere, not anytime soon.

[reallifetomato]

I keep forgetting to post this but....

 apparently i have strange dreams, i dont think they are weird ive had them my whole life, but when i talk about them to other people there is always a reaction anyway i wrote one down (right after i woke up dont judge me on the spelling or grammar i was half asleep and let auto correct do whatever) and thats under the cut. OH and if you analyze dreams what the fuck is any of it mean?

Hospital? This was first dream p sure I died anyway hospital where park st post is

Something sinister kept going in but they wanted weird things

It was a testing/research hospital not a healing one

You go in but you don’t come out

Job interviews being held only wanted certain ppl strong body ppl but weak minded

Our friend made it through but as we were escorted out we saw something

Don’t remember what it was but it gave me a knawing feeling in my stomach

We waited for them at the entrance so we could go home together but they never came out and no answer when calling

Next day comeback would only be allowed in as a paitent

Excused self to bathroom and started searching hospital several rooms looked like small college classrooms but still something off ppl were blank some who were too far gone were doubling over the tables were being dragged to the back of room into a doorway

Searched rooms for freind found them but got caught being dragged away somewhere eventually squirmed free

I ran

I shouted trying to wake everyone up begging them to leave or help me but met with nothing but blank stares found my friend tried to drag her with me but she had turned she latched on opened her mouth and wailed to signify she found me I told her I would comeback as I tore myself from her and ran through double doors

It looked like I had run into a light but I was outside and it was pitch black no streetlights phone flashlight wasn’t working and there were things outside with me

I ran again

I tripped up the stairs running back to the park st ally where the post office was

Something grazed my ankles

I tried to stand but something hit me and my eyes went out of focus

Woke up here and went nah need more sleep

Woke up in a parking garage where the lanes and turns seemed to narrow for a group of three let alone a car I watched for accidents for a bit

I realized there was something I was supposed to be doing I need to grab my purse and jacket from the car

I walked to the elevators

Made it down to the bottom only to find I didn’t grab my stuff walked back up two flights of stairs realized I had my wallet at least and that was enough I started window shopping crazy store like someone too 90/2000 Japan niche pop culture and threw up 4 stories of it but I was cold and wanted to go back and get my jacket

I run into ppl I have dreamt about before their actions all too familiar

She wants a ring she wants love wants a life comfort something anything that her abusive parents can’t offer the man is at least 40 being extremely generous

The girl is maybe 12

He on the surface knows this is wrong but it looks like he is just acting for the ppl around him he wants this so he puts on a feeble show for those around him

He gives in if you can call it that and buys her a ring and promised to move her in and take care of her I want my jacket

I walk up to them and tell the girl long time no see and we squeal together like college sorority girls I think about buying a sweatshirt

They are all hideous

I drag her away from the man she gazes lovingly at the ring on her finger we stare out the window as the man pays it is evening now and it is cold we see ppl outside couple on dates two other girls walk up next to us

They are disgusted by the sight before them

“She shouldn’t be dating him he’s mine” they bicker and bitch about it behind the stores window where it’s safe I don’t know why dread starts building in my stomach

I recognize the bitchers next to us and say hi dragging the girl along with me

I insist we catch up and hang out go do something right now

I need a group I need numbers

We decided on going to the fun place an amusement park across town you have to pass through another parking garage we all being walking leisurely arms linked and the man yelling behind us I want to walk faster

We walk up the garage fourth floor is where I notice we are we flashed forward there and there are the same ppl from before the recruits the cultists the blank faces from the hospital they are tuning what seems to be drills

We quickly and quietly work our way up more floors staying as out of sight as possible

On the roof we are exhausted now unable to move as we did before we wade through the group bumping about I bump into the friend I wanted to go back for

We are all drained but we are almost there just need to weave through parking dividers to reach the edge of the roof and cross over the bridge into the Forrest into the fun place

I’ve done this before I know something is off this isn’t how it was before

Three ppl stand on the bridge I walk closer none the less I’m still staggering out to the corner the group I have accumulated trailed behind me giving up going some one else shoots ahead of me they over take me but not by much they don’t sense the danger in what they are doing

There is no caution to their steps no trepidation to their stance

They reach the bridge close enough I see all of their faces but a hear nothing the woman asserts her self but the other three have mangalled faces which contort and the lung she isn’t fast enough and gets pounced

Someone screams it could have been me but everything felt so distant one of the things see me and starts charging

I trip over a divider the ppl behind me take notice of the events say nothing but scramble to get closer

I continue to stumble through the maze of dividers in the lot before making it back to the group two ppl from the hospital group dispose of the creature but more begin to come

Can’t gauge how many because I am accosted by a looming thing with a rubber clown full head mask

We push him

Kick him

Shove him away

We are still tried and he keeps getting back up

A smile creeps out almost as wide as the big goofy one on the mask before it the teeth are humanoid but are too sharp

He jumps with speed but we dodge someone has a lighter and attempts to melt the rubber mask

It stinks melted rubber and decay

The clown stares up at us blankly and unmoving we though the mask hand melted enough to stop him we could no longer see the face underneath it

We back away and slowly he stands back up

We push him down and try again the rubber bubbles and our hands have burns everywhere others are fighting these things

I want to go back to the store I wanted my jacket

It’s too hot for our hands to continue biting his face with the lighters so we pull away his head squishling rotates in our direction large cartoon googly eyes appare where the human ones had been burned away the rubber melts down his face we want it to stop

Whatever he was his head was hot and in the process of liquefying we stomped on his face as hard and with as much gusto as we could muster juices flowed out you could hear them squealsh under or feet feel the bones and cartilage crack

The clown gruffs out a chuckle and continues to stare up at us we light him on fire again drag him to the roof matinence closet and hang him while his laugh grows louder and confident the fire burns and he stares at us

The fight behind us feels like it’s coming to a close

The clown convulses as his neck begins to break and the fire consumes and oxygen he wanted to breath

He still has the wide smile as the mask falls off of his face

I turn around to go back for my jacket

[pizzaworms]

the ending parts of some of the long freaky dreams i had today (aka the only parts i remember clearly)

my roommate/ex was sitting in a chair just kind of going off in a pretentious and like... wannabe sassy? manner about how he “tells it like it is” and “oh honey ive been doing this so much longer than you ya know?”, sounding totally unlike himself irl, and i said something like “nic this isnt you”, and he transforms into what i could only describe as a chaos demon like he was a creature made of rainbow-reflective obsidian that changed from fleshy to smooth metallic texture, changed from humanoid with horns to a long cat-headed thing, and just was giving me this terrible creepy look. at this point flies manifested in the air around my head and were buzzing at a really annoying frequency around my ears (normally bugs dont bother me) and there was 1 fly that was buzzing at a higher pitch than the rest, and was moving in an erratic pattern, and i just wanted it to stop and as i was trying to will it to stop it was like the dream itself froze up like a computer, and the creatures cat face was moving in front of me in this stop-and-go glitchy motion (like when a glitched gif has one section of the gif moving and the other parts still), but the flies kept moving and buzzing, and i remember trying to say “it wont stop! theyre not stopping!!” and actively trying to tell myself to keep calm and that things would be okay, but i still found panicked words coming out of my closed mouth. anyways after the dream unfroze i asked the demon/creature for help to get rid of the flies, and he said, laughing, “are you really stuck in that human form?” and then suddenly i was looking from his perspective at myself as a turned into like.. a skeleton creature with a lion head made from the same weird black material he was made of? and then i did this lurch forward motion and became a full-bodied black lion with a huge mane and i just saw that 1 annoying fly get punched super hard by my furry paw-fist? and i was contemplating killing the other flies i woke up. after i woke up from this dream i felt really odd, like lightheaded and my forehead felt like it had a heavy pressure on it for the next 5 hours.

the next dream i remember ended on a weird surreal note. i was looking at the night sky (just past sunset so dark pinkish-blueish) and i could hear some old episodes of seinfeld playing in the background. the camera zooms in on a television and im looking at kramer in what it clearly someone else’s white van trying to sleep under a carpet he found in there. then it just shows a compilation of him bending his legs in exaggeratedly flexible positions, like one leg fully behind his back and then twisting his ankle and doing something else with his other really-long leg, just trying to contort his body to fit in this van in weird ways. finally he starts to fall asleep sitting down with both his legs behind his back and his stomach kinda protruding, and this narrator voice comes on that sounded just like one of the old ladies in a souls game and says “oh, poor dear kramer. god must truly be with him, for he has no care or kin. kinkin. kinkin. kinkin.” and “kinkin” kept echoing for a bit and i got annoyed/scared and then woke up.