#I AM DANG NEAR 20

[ziipzeepzop-eez]

I took adult multivitamin and now I have adult chest pains help me why does it still hurt why I am an 💥adult💥 arent I the gummy teen vitamins am I supposed to still take them help me why does it feel like a. heart burn.

[misc-obeyme]

NEW MAMMON CARD AND I'M HERE TO YELL ABOUT HIM, I GOT HIM WITHIN 20 PULLS YAYY

But now i gotta pull for Levi !! I haven't read Mammon devilgram yet but I'm so excited!! And the new memory card with 13 and Beel, Im dYING. BEEL IS ANOTHER ONE OF MY FAVES AND THE COLLAR AND THE TATTOOS (?) AND WJDJJFKF. AND THIRTEEN?? MA'AM. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE ONE CHANCE?!

She looks so prettyyyy 😭 happy pride to me, the bisexuals (me) are winning !!! I'm getting this card no matter what!! My poor coworker watched me have a Moment™ when I saw the cards because I got the notification near closing. AND I JUST SAW THERE'S ANOTHER MEMORY CARD WITH MAMMON IN IT?? I AM SO GRINDING THIS EVENT, CELESTIAL BOXES DON'T GOT NOTHING ON ME !!

Also the login support bonus where Mammon is like "let me show you why they go for the bad boys" like 1. YES PLEASE but 2. okay whatever you say mister heart of gold (would burn the world down for MC probably).

the gloves AKWJDJF and the CHOKER AAAA. THEY'RE ALWAYS GIVING HIM CHOKERS AND COLLARS AND MY HEART CAN'T TAKE IT. 😭😭 i needed this after the terrible day i had on Sunday, retail ain't for the weak. It makes me wonder who in the cast could handle working in retail. I'm trying to think of Mammon or Lucifer as managers and having to explain policies, and the specifics of coupons and sales. Or even theft, because you're not allowed to do anything but be overly annoying with customer service. That's a funny idea.

ALSO I'M STILL THINKING ABOUT MY COFFEE AU, I'VE JUST BEEN WAY TOO TIRED TO PUT ANYTHING INTO WORDS OKAY BYEEE

- ✨ anon

AH I got the card tooooo!! I haven't read the Devilgram yet either but that is next!

I actually really like all the villain outfits?? The hero ones are okay, but they're a little boring in comparison. And like the villains got Barbatos, Solomon, AND Mammon!?? I mean there's no question which side I would choose lol.

And yesssss, Beel looks amazing, too!! AND THIRTEEN. She's stunning and I love her.

I pulled more than I maybe would have in the Nightmare because I wanted to grind this event too!! There are so many things that I'm totally loving!! Straight up, it's the villains and the CARDS are really good, too!!!

LOLOL I laughed so hard when I first saw Mammon's login bonus line! I was like listen, I know you think you're a bad boy and that's really dang cute, but we all know you're a good boy. :)

But yes, they REALLY NEED TO STOP with the choker/collar situation!!! I swear it's every single Mammon outfit nowadays and every time it feels like a personal attack lol.

Oof I'm sorry about working retail, I know it sucks! I think Lucifer would be good at being a manager, but he'd probably scare the shit out of customers. Maybe that's a good thing lol. Mammon would charm everybody just by being his adorable self. He's just got that outgoing personality, so I think he'd do all right. Might blow up every now and again with someone pushing too far. I think Asmo would also do well, but he's also not gonna let anyone get away with just anything.

I kinda see Beel being too nice. Like he'd be good at it, but he'd be the one who just lets customers yell at him without defending himself at all.

Belphie, Satan, and Levi would all be failures for different reasons, put those guys in the back lol.

And no worries at all, take your time! No obligations here, I love to hear about it as long as you wish to share it, whenever that may be!

[amloveabledeathmo]

I love all of your asks! Thank you so much for initiating! You always have interesting things to ask people so here's an ask for you in return. What is a funny thing that happened to you? For me, it was when I was working as a forestry technician and I had to go to the bathroom out in the wilderness. I told my male partner "don't look" and hopped into the bushes to do my business. I pulled my pants down to my ankles, braced myself against a big, old tree, and just as I was about to go... THE DANG TREE FELL OVER AND I FELL WITH IT! My partner yelled, "OMG CAN I LOOK NOW?" And I, with my pants round my ankles and lying on my back, was laughing too hard to yell anything back. Later on, he was retelling the story and said I peed so hard it took a tree down.

That's hilarious 😂. Using the outdoors to potty is always an adventure. When I was like 14 I used to do endurance races with my dad. Endurance races are horse rides that can include multiple levels; fun runs which are about one loop and 15 miles, limited distance is usually 20 to 30 miles, regular which are between 50 and 65 miles and usually at least three loops with some breaks between them, and finally there are 100 milers which are 100 miles and multiple loops and the only distance I never did. (There's also sometimes something that's like horse and rider and the rider runs next to the horse or something). Also these are not like race run fast, just for the safety of the horse a lot of the time is walking and trotting very little cantering or galloping(do so right in the last few miles is not illegal but everyone will talk and it will not be nice things).

Anyways on the longest loop during one of the rides we did out in the desert, my dad was talking to another rider who was with us at the time. My horse always lagged way behind, Ghazi gave zero fucks about the horses leaving him behind which is rare in horses. I found myself needing to pee and thought well I'll just wait till this dude decides to ride off or maybe I'll hold it till we get to the vet check. Nobody really cares about using the bathroom but I am quite shy so I did care about it and didn't even want to say anything with the other guy there.

About 30 minutes later I realized I was gonna pee in the saddle if I didn't find somewhere and discreetly started trying to get my dad's attention. Bladder is getting more urgent and dad is ignoring me so I just left the trail, went rather far out to find a hill to pee behind and struggled to get off Ghazi without peeing myself and him. He is not at all behind the hill let me tell you and he perks up when a couple riders go past on the trail. So I get done, get remounted, and am heading back to the trail when my dad and his horse King come flying down the trail.

Apparently even though I had been saying Dad hey Dad before I lagged behind and left the trail he never heard it and when him and the other dude caught up to a different rider he turned around and I was gone. He then rode backwards asking people if they'd seen me and they said no even though I saw them from my improvised potty.

Unfortunately for my mother the four riders that were now ahead of us got in to the vet check and started loudly saying Tom lost his daughter. As I was the only Junior in the ride, mom knew it was me and got to be worried until we came in and then my dad told everyone how it was all because I was embarrassed to pee near people and everyone laughed about it. It's funny now but it was embarrassing then.

What I mean by they weren't concerned about the potty is I've seen others just hand the reigns over to someone (and been the one to hold the reigns as well) and then just squat next to their horse to pee.

*Bonus story: Took my niece with me to the Dr's once when she was about 5 and the Dr asked me if I had kids and she very loudly and proudly proclaimed "Aunt A-- has dogs!"

[carmenized-onions]

have u written on tumblr/ao3 before? i cant find anything else on this blog and i want to consume anything uve put out on the internet no matter the fandom please please please and thankyou

Oh my poor bug, I did write for DBH yeeaarrss ago, but it's like,,,, it's aged, yknow? @neatcointricks , if you want, but it's definitely not my proudest work lmao

Other than that though, all we got is Naruto fanfic from when I was twelve, and then like. My actual short-films/scripts/poetry irl!!

I write as like, a career (though we're stuck in admin hell rn boys, these fucking STRIKES ARE KILLING ME), so whenever I mention writing forever, it's cause I plan on it! But makin' my OWN dang fandoms, one day. Or at the very least working on a team of writers making OUR OWN DANG FANDOMS.

Anyways, the only thing on THIS blog is just Chicago's Kindest, some people would be sane and write other things so they're not locked in on one fucking thing. i am . not one of these people.

But also, I do HAVE an A03 account, same username, but I haven't posted any of Chicago's Kindest yet, cause I'm lazy, but hopefully when I'm near done I'll get to it. I should make a FAQ shouldn't I,,,,, god that takes so much effort. I will do it though. just give me 20 minutes and some WD 40

[renegadeknight]

Fic Writer Tag

Tagged by the lovely @oliviassunrise, thank you ❤️

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

11... for now

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

473,874

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Mainly TLOU right now! But I have a lot of unpublished L&O: SVU and Dramione fics collecting dust too

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Stubborn Love - tlou; modern au

Precious Cargo - tlou; Ellie sick fic; Joel pov

So Much For Cargo - tlou; Ellie sick fic; Ellie pov of Precious Cargo

Bitter - tlou; Ellie pov drabble from episode 6

Rooftop Rendezvous - tlou; canon verse alternate meet; Joel pov

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes, always! I usually wait until I have the next chapter ready if it's on the most recent chapter of a long fic tho, cause I feel compelled to have something to offer in return

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't like writing angsty endings these days, all about the happy endings recently but probably the first installment of my OG hp fic where the main OC is taken to prison at the end.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Maybe this is cheating cause it's not published yet but it's gonna be Stubborn Love when we get there.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not so far and if I ever do I'll just tell them to come back with a warrant.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Not so much.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not currently, maybe someday if the right idea hit me.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of and I'm not sure I'd want to know. I have had illustrations stolen and it's not a fun feeling.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No but I would be honored to have that happen.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes but nothing that's published.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

How does anyone pick a favorite all time ship? I guess the one I've obsessed over the longest is Elliot x Olivia

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Probably the hp trilogy I started when I was like 13 lol. It's my first fic so I'd love to finish it but the hp vibes are not what they once were.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I love planting little details of foreshadowing and landing emotional gut punches.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I have to go through about 4 drafts of anything before I'm happy enough with it to publish it. Which means I am sloooooow at updating.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I'm no where near fluent enough in any other languages to include it in my fic without substantial support and I am too shy to ask for that so probably not happening for me. I do enjoy it when other writers include it tho.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I have an ~84 page hand written Power Rangers fic from when I was like 10, specifically the In Space cast meets the Time Force cast if I remember right.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Stubborn Love, hands down. It's been such a joy to plot and write and I've just put so much into it and there's still a lot left but I'm already planning to bind myself a physical copy of it when it's done because I love it so dang much.

I shall tag: @captainredspade @ameerawrites and @becomethesun if you feel like it ofc, no pressure! ❤️

[wormgremlin]

Friendly reminder that there are products that prioritize longevity still out there! A lot of times they're still expensive but not top of the market expensive. The issue more comes from something else being sacrificed in the name of longevity.

Here are a few examples of things I have been in the market for recently:

Phones! Fairphone comes in at #1. It's expensive yes, but cheaper than an iPhone coming in at $600-800 but being theoretically upgradable ad infinitum. Plus values fair trade sourcing. A few other smaller companies maintain right to repair and sell reasonably priced replacement parts, e.g. Unihertz.

Backpacks/bags! I just bought an Osprey to retire my >10 year old backpack. They are built to last and have a guarantee to repair or replace the bag FOR LIFE. That means this is the last bag I really should ever NEED to buy. And they're good for it. I had a teacher who had a 20 some odd year old bag, sent it in for a repair, they decided they couldn't fix it, couldn't replace it because they don't even make that model anymore. So told her to pick a bag and they would ship it to her free of cost. Again, expensive for a backpack, but if you shop sale items, $50-100. Still cheaper than some. It's not a designer name, it's not super cute, but it's a dang nice bag and an even better guarantee.

Boots! There have apparently been increasing QC issues, especially since the manufacturer change, but built to last compared to other boots, and they also have a lifetime guarantee. I am guilty of wearing the same boots every day no matter what the weather or my outfit is like. Plus I have bad feet and knees. So yeah, $200-300 pair of boots, but at least I can actually use them unlike the $600+ designer boots coming out these days. I hear they're pretty good about fulfilling the guarantee too.

Computers (laptops specifically)! Framework somewhat recently came on the scene as a completely upgradable laptop. Continually cranking out upgrades and support. Similar to a fairphone version of a computer, but less focus on sourcing. I've actually done a lot less research on this because they simply don't make it to second hand markets, and the new price tag is too much for me. But starts at $850, which is a hell of a lot cheaper than a MacBook these days, or even most Microsoft and Dell computers.

I'm not saying any of these things are cheap. I am saying that you can still buy longevity if you seek out the market. I put my money into boots and a backpack because both of my old ones were falling apart on me (3+ years and 10+ years respectively). I have more money than I've had in years, but I am still poor af. But I decided the extra money was worth it to never have to worry about getting holes in either of them ever again or have to think about scrounging the money to buy another one.

This of course comes in part from being raised upper middle class with a very much "invest in good boots" mentality passed down over generations from when my grandfather was a houseboy for a wealthy family almost 100 years ago. So yeah. I wore a pair of boots with holes in them until I had $300 to splurge on boots (and there was a sale). I used my backpack with holes in it until I could splurge on a new one (and there was a sale).

I'm also queer and gender is meaningless to me which means I buy a lot of men's products! Women's products are simply skimpy garbage (like seriously, buy a nice 100% cotton pair of men's Levi's -- I got mine second hand, but will never go back; how do you make jeans skimpy???). It takes a lot of intention and research and either money or ability to get things second hand (which is size restrictive, takes a lot of time, and often ability to go pick things up which in America=drive). But the market exists.

Which I'm not saying exists in a boots theory economy is good. But it is possible to exist without having to replace boots and phones and computers and bags on a near yearly basis.

This makes me so sad and also I'm trying to remember if any of the Discworld books dealt with late stage capitalism

[vinnamah]

I am so glad I moved. The state I live in now is so much better. Like, in terms of state government and laws and policies, as well as cost of living and minimum wage and stuff like that. I actually qualify for health insurance and food stamps here, when I didn't before I moved. That being said...

TL;DR - This place is fucking uninhabitable. I hate everything about the Land of Eternal Darkness and Cold. Humans were not meant to live in such an environment.

(Long rant incoming below, you've been warned)

It is just too dang cold. The temps didn't even get above 20°F today, and winter only started yesterday. We had gone like record-breakingly long into November before getting first snow this year, and I feel like it has been going on for way too long, so what do you MEAN it is gonna keep snowing basically through February and maybe even into March or April? January and February average temps never get above freezing, and frequently get single-digit temps, even *subzero* temps (in Fahrenheit)! What the actual HECK? That sounds like Hell to me.

The sun starts setting at like 4pm and doesn't start rising until close to 8am. We live in the land of eternal darkness. Vitamin D who? Don't know her. I DO know SAD or seasonal depression or whatever theh are calling it nowadays, though. Especially with my messed-up sleep schedule. There are some days that I never see the sun at all. Humans were meant to see the sun for more than like 15 minutes for at least most days.

The cold weather starts setting in near the beginning of Autumn and doesn't leave until very late Spring. We get like 3 months of fairly mild weather, and then it is back to Cold and Dark times. And you're still expected to get up and be a productive member of society, despite it being cold enough to kill you, the snow deep enough to get lost in, and it being eternally nighttime? What a scam!

The other day I forgot my gloves. It snowed for like an hour while I was at work. Had to brush snow off my car windows so I could see to drive home, maybe 30 seconds of my habd touching the snow. I could not feel my pinkie finger for most of the drive home, and when feeling started coming back, it was incredibly painful. And this is normal????

Wanna take a hot shower? Well TOO BAD, you better SPEEDRUN that shit! Because for some reason, being really cold outside means the hot water only lasts half as long. It's the same hot water heater year-round, so I don't get why its capacity is halved in this weather!

"I'd rather be cold than hot, because you can always put on another layer of clothes but you can only get so naked" yeah well I've lived in one of the most extreme places for each side of the temperature spectrum, and I'd say "give me 110°F summers with 100% humidity" over THIS. Because in the cold, everything aches and everything goes numb. You go clumsy because you can't feel your anything. The more layers you put on, the longer it takes to put everything on and off every time you go in and out of somewhere heated. Or you die of heatstroke because you don't wanna take off your million layers. You gotta wear gloves, which means you can't use your touchscreen devices, not without buying special gloves that only sometimes work. No matter how many layers you wear, you are still cold.

And I am learning so much about how awful it is to live somewhere that it snows. Sometimes your car doesn't wanna start if it is too cold. You have to shovel snoe and dig your vehicle out. You have to shovel your entite driveway. You are SOL if the snowplows haven't come by yet but you need to go somewhere. The Silent Hill fog ALONE that accompanies snow most of the time is way worse than ANY rainstorm. My first ever time driving in snow in my entire life was on the freaking HIGHWAY, because it started snowing when I got to work and did not stop the entire time, and the highway hadn't been plowed, so that was terrifying. You can get stuck, you can slip and slide, you have no idea where the lanes of the road are, you can try to turn and your car can just DECIDE it doesn't want to. You gotta buy special snow tires, but only for the time of year when it snows, so either sell or store your other tires. But then you need to get normal tires back onto your car once the snow is over, too! Your windshield wiper wears out way faster thanks to the salt. You need to have all the fluids in your car swapped out for winter versions that won't freeze every winter. You need to get your car washed way more often, or else the constant snow and salt will rust your vehicle to death!

And everything is so slippery! People put salt onto the roads and sidewalks to fix it, but then your car gets covered in a layer of gross white salt-film. I didn't know that happened! I don't know what to do about it! It kills your visibility when driving, especially when every other person has a giant lifted pickup truck with LED headlights brighter than a thousand suns. Someone at work today told me to use the winterized non-freezing windshield wiper fluid. I don't have that, because my windshield wiper sprayers have never worked on my car. I've never needed them until now, apparently. And my windshield wipers aren't doing anything about it without fluid. Can't use water, that would just give me a layer of ice instead, as well as possibly cracking my windshield. And the salt-film covers your headlights too, so if you DON'T have the brighter-than-the-sun LED headlights, they don't work for crap if you don't remember to clean the salt scum off of them before driving.

[bitletsanddrabbles]

The Trail of Rabbits

Mid-March I got the random urge to listen to some Peter Gabriel, specifically "Family Snapshot". A friend had introduced me to the German version ages ago, but it occurred to me that I'd never actually heard the English? So I looked it up and then, because I couldn't quite remember the background (I knew it was an assassination attempt of someone I was not really familiar with), I looked it up.

Last time I'd looked into the song's history, I'd just wanted to know what it was about, so I didn't really take time reading. This time I read and I became rather intrigued. After all, "An Assassin's Diary" had to be a pretty interesting book for Peter Gabriel to write a song based off of it (particularly when he dubbed it 'a nasty book'). So I did some more poking and found reviews from writing critics of the time. They all seemed to have the same opinion:

This is ghost written trash produced to distract people and make it seem like Nixon couldn't possibly have been behind the attempt on Wallace's life, which, of course, meant he probably was.

Well. Colour me very curious. I mean, I only have a Creative Writing BA that's dang near 20 years old by now that I use for writing fanfiction. Would these things stand out to me the way they had to the Great Writing Minds of the time?

So I trotted over the the County Library...then World Cat...then spent a lot of time figuring out what search would get me the book I actually wanted (this was strangely difficult?) and put in an Interlibrary Loan request.

It came today.

I am currently on page 57 and have been convinced for the past 10 pages, if not longer, that the critics were absolutely right. This not only ghostwritten trash, it's badly ghostwritten trash that should, by rights, be shelved in 'improbable fiction'. And yes, I know, truth is stranger than, but have I mentioned this thing is badly written? I mean really, really badly written. I look at Mum's "Letters of Raymond Chandler" book and think to myself that the person who wrote this book was trying to write like he was writing Chandler pretending to be one of Chandler's characters, but without understanding anything to do with the man or the genera.

The misspellings that are supposed to make the thing so dang realistic are not only inconsistent in their presence, they aren't even sensible misspellings! Not for an ignorant person. Not for anyone with a learning disorder - and I should know that last one, given that there are several varieties of those scattered through my family! Mainly it reads like it was typed by someone who couldn't properly use a typewriter, which would have made sense if it wasn't hand written.

Now, am I going to finish it? Oh yes. Absolutely. Not because it's good, but because it's informative. If you ever want to know what a badly ghostwritten political cop out looks like, read this! As a writer, this has value. A lot of value. If nothing else, it can teach you a ton about first person voice and how not to do it.

But there is not a damn thing you or anyone else can do to convince me that Nixon wasn't behind the Wallace assassination attempt at this point. I can think of no other reason for this drivel to exist.

[libidomechanica]

Untitled (“Desire”)

A limerick sequence

               1

Desire! Trot, and once grow the demons all. I am water of their    will keep, while new-born mind!    He saw the day, he with the Bondage of spruce, near and not find.

               2

In my fashion. I come! While I languish in melody in their caused. Such    a steeds, and give a musky    Fawn of weeds, and up and darkle. I leave thoughts like to me?

               3

To the great effect. The best like tanners gave,—I claims, the transfer her turn    around the Dust, this godhead    o’er their heart alike chast minds interfered, and clasping arms.

               4

Somewhere had been poison’d pride, ride or son of the Earth in the quantity    encumber’d yet, love and    I staid, strive with rusting Destinies. Therefore we may be sad.

               5

Such form a synonym for Thee—Oh Shame. I wish with a gloom is a hat,    or a world in frontiers    he crept from the shepeheards God, the poor loves. We turn thine eyes.

               6

Full and omnipotent, and Years for sophomore glorious born our wives a    maid? Or natives of the    daylight to knows: to such things rushed love with my absence of Doom.

               7

Like an eagle in it; but shoes in a kind of love! The gender this    exordium? He draws two loving    rash one. Had Cathering throng, to the women do in me?

               8

All vital think so, though life’s buried. His think upon. That faculties, with    immortality! From    the poor rogues? Her mind; it is just another count dust species.

               9

Pant on my speak thy resolute, and what could the day; but the wishes before    and a dreamers to    cease; from the falling can tell! And when the found she asleep sound.

               10

The oscillating hinge. Not even know, and if you had but by and fell    strong in a sheet. Of thou    graunt the floor of porcelain held Love’s mighty wrought I mistake?

               11

With some little lap-dog breede both night’st his still? Come, Sleep; here either woman,    which we dwells, also be    you could distant; the shrine, and she asleepe did not limit much.

               12

What the appointed time your shrine! To feel like skaters of the prince or war?    ’St, in ghost nobly, and    heav’n first their boys, or promises be best part of my Prayer!

               13

Do I dare to those partner, and lips to know through the red-ribb’d ledges drawing    orator as the    difficulty smooth’d itself advance, her fear to you: I love!

               14

The temper or woes. A things of the Baltic’s navigation. We driving.    Sickly sight of peach. And    crying had, to turn around; by lovers, asleep in hear white!

               15

I make in every polished now-a- days. Wrappers in and cleanse his aid, as    one the flood is finished    now there where again, for love, thy look, give for friend hath the dead.

               16

The purest sent, while your queen of marriage preventeen, felt a dog then. The    endgame of dream she smile,    to menage loath to forgetful pain a kind of course beguiled.

               17

Reclining on my properties in my fashion. The pirouettes of good    night, but that all. With shall    go well by the red rust don’t say so, to give my thee this World.

               18

And twist the deep in them in a suit here. Other short at twal’ at night. ’Ring    rocks. Amid the bedral,    in the English green Thirst like a ball of yours, I rather win.

               19

And from his speech t’ engarland and began to fair vermin, a favour    among thee, view set a    love resisted, or like it. A vestal’s side answer above.

               20

The pillowes, swim before was turned again, and eating view, fair, thy glories,    Love our forever.    To master of sympathies, tis so deem’d really place for mend.

               21

The lining through lean Hunger and I presume? I care na by. Lilies on    Hermes had to swing arms    of manhood stormy stour; ye geck at me too, at the earth Hell!

               22

Worlds could I abhorred and rage, danged down, and no blemish, but when leap, and    knuckle. Without shoes, no    mask I try on. But herself to Heav’n-born, a good where nearly.

               23

From young, and plaster is cramm’d with a sword! Quiet’s call bad properties in    what you this,. It’s like a    great examples daily fed, where to haue for much did Juan’s snare.

               24

Could chain, and take so longed. Did he peek or Latin laureate’s statues, friends,    by his clothed by dead eyes    throne: see now, by Honour is purchased by a bare arms that much.

               25

And all those hand error, she never could read the Cyprian lord, above    than the Fiend do not like.    Whose longer roves sweetly kept in a suit thy mould, my dear!

               26

She sumptuously-feathered shades, and round with mirk and unto the blood. Still, let    us taste thy mother    danger if thy servile clocks with capsules in the care na by.

               27

While praisde notes, peel your eyes hatching sun restores where be and Priests in nothing    the dark. The bonie lass, that    men breaks the way to new Elysium, but promise of thine.

               28

Asia, whereon was broken he rose. And clasping angel fell, where one dozen    new men curses. Her    secret for the better noon, for your poor; gross clay stranger guest.

               29

To rail at the lowest they hang nodding thy purity. When too late, its    peace, perhaps with oyster-    shells, while it down, but Juan, what of thou vnlucky thought buried day.

               30

With it a tear. Our souls in undistinguish wrung his mourning with sails of    burning sun. Till strike mine.    The sun will stop as the cathedral; but wisely kept the year.

               31

Where will to his paltry things, the grave at the stairs ascending view, fair, ay    me so wondrous battle-    song that fate it. Be better this the beauties parcht; her days seen!

               32

By all them a curbside pools that ye can reach, within when Love’s latest bed.    Yea, all my thumbs press most    through bound these deeply on your blood, by which the most evil call.

               33

Since the chest—And took there is beam once I see how his scythes hang a man,    her man of eternal    Laws are bad. Yet each ray;— but only troubled, those her father?

               34

I said her fire is a pile of them! Politic, cautious, harebrained, and awful    arches vary the    sky?—Convert; or else hearsay, or will smother, ere we are tears.

               35

Through the yellow soft illusions, before abhor and her far, and hates remain!    To whom I sing, lone,    to the ledger lives a little jealous dreadful impulse rest.

               36

What! Opens her bosom work, containing pyne I, you knowest spoke and bleeding    his tongue and therefore    on the heart and when the squardon my hearts, and ran before his.

               37

The screech owl to my fault; I crave the wine. Or speak gentle, got I know than    seamen. The clicking hand    luck’s all them, bleeding like Eve’s arrow for me not, grow again.

               38

Unless I knew it; but doubt if across the sure when the moon, that never;    tis all the sternly dealt    their pain I could rather this first and lost.—Ah then I am.

               39

Some veins of love just like the old grand sunflower! So checking hero thorough    the day’s working purple    through th’ horizon peeps, and keep this career homage.

               40

The Hall, dropt for him, by each pray’r? Dear fatal shore who sternly dealt their way;    but thou so wear! They know    little space and so it seeme my death repent old man came we?

               41

My morning in the last I say; I stretched pose, fixed on the solitary    past and death-like a wink,    whenever had been sae smart, wealth, the kiss’d the road! Tho’ they will.

               42

In silence stroke of eight of Allah; unto the Soul of your passions strook.    Bring thy foul affliction’s    son, a waxen, and twist, and the fallow; even their own fires.

               43

The shepherd, sitting Castlereagh! Not too precipices, glaciers, volcanos,    orange a thing with    her leave for the tear come, with lightly taut in the marble flood.

               44

The time for laik o’ gear maks you truth, blowne away by the Thundering me.    The greedy of these begin    with came down and to sometimes for a forests. Made prostrate.

               45

Thy image on the slavish, save sooth, would bend his favour that we drown’d me    a sweet are your second    I felt with discreet surpassed. As she dies away. Some to me.

               46

In the trees watching heart-of-hearts a sever: it must now she is but coughs    will was endeavourite,    and him to the Oda, upon the sphere, and all the restored.

               47

The artery of love some heart. A jargon, a billows be well-proportions    garb with fearful things,    and teaches on thy mighty violent remain, here all our life!

               48

That seem with every scholar poor souls resolved on an English green boast offered    young lip began in    a nest of mankind began to make you. Both my valentine.

               49

How do well the drank him not Prince mourns for things remounts Amyntas; then press    will hardly over, from    her white. As may sleep aloof or smother would be together.

               50

He, being my finger of the dead? How happy regions of Leda, shall    see me. What sad, sorrow    departure, as he went, and a way as any bed alway.

               51

And then soul, let go! The prime Desires, warm from the doom was pre-    existinguishing place could be    a saint he was not for each. We tore out of a thousand bar.

               52

I that to whom the falling down toy. Help, come and that would ne’er a flowing    pearl, and look vainly for    half a gale; but not even as wheat … it may be of Biron.

               53

Oft have your visit. Stunned with a kiss, and care! And Glory into an    embarrassment, to the Trial    Men, and sere, my name to, else than uncrossable laws: both make.

               54

Attended, they remove, and look at the forests, lover, answer: There, where    threads the highest mould my    fellows close. I should represent,—condense, in a rill—or raise.

               55

Like a trumpet’s call his faynting refuge, slippery asphalte yards oft uttered    men say Now I look. And    dusky caves, black with one of those curse than therefore than vile tongue.

               56

Nor a clouds among throne, his own mouth that, may looks odd in thee rhetoric    to design. With increased    in mountains of Leander made returns to the country maid.

               57

Good morrow—for the goods when wind below. And with shame, in wonted water    shall fiction may think at    least something him be gilt by the question with my valentine.

     ��         58

Thou messengers turn’d a goodly ground. And every glance, those dark are summer’s    doom assigned to Cupids    might hath the doolfu’ tale; then she love to plain terms he must weep!

               59

Give salutation may like to woman’s heart by night, ere with a flames to    buy slave of the Banquet    orders of what at thy fathers but force this. Of all our voice.

               60

His Highness will scandal now an apple. But from a school’d onely plane    of maybe it’s to sometimes    men string of my lot to meditate upon. He will come.

               61

In beauty was endless like to a hair were so white! Descending which no    more; such as the spring;    sharp satires, long-settl’d eies when showed their works or a crime, Sir.

               62

From a Corner for what you pleasure it within that faith, to the this, by    the ground. Their campfires    the altar rise, and her tears with the most of much of women.

               63

Where I leave me thoughts to die. All the good do t ye, gentle wren shall sweet    might be moved, thy image    starts, puts on making of pleasure, in case of the spy you proved.

               64

The outside ring: and every morning turned, he sail’d, and warm th’ unfruitful    passionate shall feeling    page music fled, and what is its back too. Me but mine eyes.

               65

Nor durst he dwelt, though natural nursing so close, and spend shame? These are riding    in the hostile she saw    them but breath, only cross, and what he and me! Like stone here fedde.

               66

Frightened me in secret deeds like allay, so gentle grew, your young, whose in    everything but such,    Amyntas—oh! God know me, they may passion for whom your black wing.

               67

’Clock: and with soft land; where is no tide he to Rhodian creature distant In    the black sacrament. New    strung each man does not a torments of warring its back from Sin?

               68

With stay this services. And Iphigene the ghastly didn’t matter happy    stately died, who fain by    that burning rails: and as yonder is not hear, with lovely bones.

               69

This man’s forming flames! Oh sing, and start a white glow tells have you grandfather,    war! An’ has neither worth    with graves, and nubby, your sad, that cross, how men they thought you are.

               70

His condition with schnapps’—sad dogs! And modest trim, but here Katinka, until    tis to praise rehearse.    And now beginning, hear, no more fast and yellow and closed dead.

               71

Told jokes in Stygian empress, for love to be broke out of a certainly    aged—what had been    poison’d by unrest. As might you could puzzle to hope. The low.

               72

There must transgressing up like to stir by night by kindly give for the morning.    But see it ruinous    eyes where invented bird’s forming Polly Stewart, their tryst.

               73

The Governor any body makes it bleeding worlds are apt to pass you    question of love. And    meticulous; but go, and far be it furre: it is like Morning.

               74

Twas on him thence came we? Myself in at them make a maiden posy, for    incorrigible spread,    not pray you, was given to love’s delight, my deeds stolne from there.

               75

Nor does nor over will. Too often kiss you, with her aid that once it was    too much less cold as I    heard thrown down he labour tost, and if you offered services.

               76

Opening sun; for love. When I would lose, he spake his pouch of being down    in a moral chimneys,    slipped by a flattering back, but ye may: the land the frighten’d.

               77

To lead to stores which a mist: the ocean I could grant apple do what nature    speak back to decay,    and down with their tryst. Or lear, but, trowth, I care I have to loue.

               78

Beneath he stops your Georgians might delight like a childhood in the respiration,    pays. And there honours    cruell might be, by only know whate’er the Hall, dropt for it!

               79

And who watch them born in Roncesvalles’ battle, men must go, and Helvoetsluys,    they have I held myself.    That they were neglected. And how about him all things grow.

               80

I’ll tak what bards can young and change. With many scorned of day. Through the shine, and    nothing her body thus    he cried, th’ enchas’d with all injustice goes, where is Spain.

               81

Toward signs painted to keep themselues to mix with Dudu turn’d up to blossome,    with shining to earth,?    And more sublimate, and see your own shy, shadow, Cynara!

               82

That their taste,’ as one pole, that much more? At lengthened beautiful lay that    eternal—just the lamps, as    shed and herself, at once lost. To keep the addition, a green.

               83

Star, entitled of amorous crowned for his bonnet crowd above my Nanie,    O; but the crouche, which don’t    know about here are coverture. And I am grieved, I look.

[underswitch-official]

UnderSwitch Part2

It… it hurts.

It hurts so much.

The pain... the pain is unbearable.

I thought the friendliness pellets would... but...

I pull my hand back and scream in pain. Flowey cackles at my stupidity.

"You IDIOT! Why would ANYONE pass up an opportunity like this?"

He says something else, but I don’t hear him say it. Everything blurs together, and I collapse. Everything is dark. And in this darkness, I hear a slow, melancholy melody, followed by a distant, cold voice.

"What are you doing, little one? Do not give up yet! Your journey is only beginning..."

I wake up in the bed of orange flowers again. I look around and find my helmet. Stand up and get moving, I think, I don’t care if it hurts. You have to get–

“Howdy! I’m Flowey. Flowey the flower!”

Dang it.

“Boy, you're new to the Underground, aren'cha? Hee hee hee. You must be so confused! Someone ought to teach you how things work down here. I guess little old me will have to do."

I mumble nervously and ready myself for whatever happens next. My SOUL shoots out of my chest.

The words that I saw by my feet last time are floating near the bottom of my field of vision, making it look like they're under Flowey.

ASRIEL LV 1 HP ██████████ 1/20

"You see that red heart? That's your SOUL, the very culmination of your entire being. It's weak right now, but you can make it stronger with LOVE! Down here, LOVE is shared through these little white 'friendliness pellets'. Go on, catch as many as you can!"

The pellets begin spinning above his head again and they fly at me again. I stagger out of the way of them, which annoys Flowey.

"Hey bud," he says, "you missed them. Let's try this again."

Five more pellets spin a bit faster at me, and I stagger in the other direction. Flowey is now angry. He shouts, "ARE YOU DEAF? ARE YOU BRAINDEAD? RUN INTO THE BULLETS! friendliness pellets."

Five more friendliness pellets shoot at me much faster. Without any time to stagger out of the way, I just curl up into a ball. The pellets just fly right over me. After they disappear, I stand up and look at Flowey. He's wearing a malicious grin.

"YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON HERE, DON'TCHA? YOU'RE DOING THIS JUST TO SEE ME SUFFER, AREN'TCHA? YOU IDIOT, IN THIS WORLD IT'S KILL OR BE KILLED," Flowey says as he surrounds me with friendliness pellets. "DIE."

He cackles as the pellets slowly close in on me. Right as they're about to hit me, they disappear, and a little jingle plays. Flowey looks confused, and a fireball appears out of nowhere next to him. It flies at him, and he gets launched across the room. I look at the words down where Flowey once was.

ASRIEL LV 1 HP ██████████ 20/20 

A bipedal goat monster approaches me with a kind and motherly air about her. Seeing how my mom neglected and sometimes verbally abused me, I don't trust her very much.

"What a miserable creature, torturing such an innocent youth. Hello, my child. I am HERA, Caretaker of the RUINS. I come here every day to see if anyone has fallen down. You are the first human in a long time." she says. "That is a nice helmet you have there. It is a shame that it has such a large crack in it."

I nod and look behind Hera.

"Ah, yes. Come, my child. I will guide you through the catacombs."

Hera asks me to take her hand, and she leads me to the next room.

I see that the walls are a cool and calming teal, and that there’s a square of red leaves on the ground and a pair of staircases.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hera's Ask Box is now open!

[allofmytoxicity]

Chapter Synopsis; An argument is had between Kaitlyn and Xander and it’s sorted out by a few very stressful words before the ball.

part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4 / part 5 / part 6 / part 7 / part 8 / part 9 / part 10 / part 11 / part 12 / part 13 / part 14 / part 15 / part 16 / part 17 / part 18 / part 19 / part 20 / part 21 / part 22 / part 23 / part 24 / part 25 / part 26 / part 27 / part 28 / part ...

Story Masterlist

Words; 2,873

Hidden in Plain Sight

16 June

“Keep your eyes on your opponent,” Xander said as I grunted, trying to keep myself stable while holding Xander’s sword away from me with my own.

“Well, I would, but the fact that my Father’s watching me distracts me a bit,” I say through gritted teeth, and manage to throw Xander off “And you’re going easy, when you know I need more practice,”

So, we restart.

Fighting is more like a dance than actual pushing and shoving. It’s more like a skill where you gracefully try to hit your opponent. It’s taken me a while to learn the steps of the graceful dance of near death, but it has paid off when I’m coming close to beating the youngest knight in the kingdom. Today though, I was just being sloppy. Sloppy as I was getting my anger out on Xander for what he had said to me earlier.

“Why are you pushing yourself so hard today?” Xander asked as I blocked one of his attacks.

“Why do you want to know so bad?” I say as I take a jab at him.

“Katie, come on. You can’t just cut me out of your life for yelling at you once, so please, just tell me,” Xander says as I push myself harder and harder.

“Can’t you just mind your own business for once!” I yell as I lunge at him and knock his sword out of his hand, onto the ground just by my Father’s feet.  

I give Xander one last glare before sheathing my sword and running back into the Castle to get ready for tonight's ball.

{----------}

I slammed open my door and walked in then slammed my door closed and took off my stuff.

I was so angry at him. At everyone that was preventing me from showing how much I love Jameson.

Alice came in and closed the door quietly as I stripped and got out what I would be wearing to the ball, but as I started to get things like a corset on, she tapped me on the shoulder, making me drop it on my foot, hurting it.

“Dang it, Alice!” I say as I walk over to my bed and pick up the corset on the way there and check to see if my toes were in any way damaged badly.

“What’s gotten you so pissed off?” Alice asks me and takes the corset from my bed and turns me around to stick it on.

“Just something Xander did earlier,” I say as I suck in a breath as Alice pulls the corset tight, not tying it though “It’s nothing big,”

“Well, it clearly is if you’re slamming doors, it’s not nothing,” Alice says as she finishes tying up the corset and starts untying my hair “But if you don’t want to talk, don’t,”

I ignored her as I sat there in a huff.

Father then suddenly burst through the doors, an enraged look on his face as he stomped towards me. Alice stood back as he did so. I tried to keep a calm look on my face and got comfy on my bed, getting ready to be told off.

“What on earth was that! To start with, you were sloppy, your posture was terrible throughout the whole thing and lastly, you almost injured the only person that you would let teach you as you tried to deliberately injure the rest of them!” Father said as I tried to finish taking out my hair, then tried to get up during Father’s lecture, but he pushed me back down.

“No, you will sit here and wait till I am done talking until you get up,” Father tells me.

“Well, would you want me to be late to the ball in which you are saying about how I truly ‘need’ a husband? Or would you like me to be fashionably late like normal? I wouldn’t mind being late as it would mean that I don’t have to spend as much time in a room with the person I’m holding a grudge against,” I said, a straight face fully intact as I contained the inner emotions I had, that wanted to burst out so easily.

“Well, the person I suspect you are holding a grudge against will be escorting you to the ball. There, you two will have to discuss your emotions and what happened out there today. If nothing is done, he will be escorting you everywhere until you two can talk things out,” Father says and then swiftly changes topic “Anyway, I don’t want you to be late, so go get ready. We will discuss this later,”

And then he leaves.

I breathe a sigh of relief when Father leaves and I can get up to go get the dress I’m wearing tonight to the ball.

“You know he doesn’t mean to be hard on you,” I hear a voice say from behind me that wasn’t Alice’s “Miss Lysandral, you can leave. I can help your sister prepare for the ball,”

“Please Xander, just call me Alice. You’re best friends with my older sister, and I’m nothing like the dungeon spider that is my younger sister.” Alice says, and I manage to push out a small smile on my face as I grab the dress I want.

I compose my face again before turning around to see Alice leave the room and the door shut.

“Why are you here?” I ask as I walk over and stick the dress down on my bed.  

I pick up my corset and try to put it on myself, finding the small task surprisingly difficult as I feel warm hands on my waist, taking the corset from my hands, and tightening it, no questions asked.

“Thank you,” I say, before stepping over to my dress.

“If you can’t even get into a corset on your own, how do you expect to get into what you call ‘a death trap’ on your own,” Xander says, and only now, is when I fully turn to face him, looking at him up and down as I did so. He looked wonderful. Clearly, someone had told him what I would be wearing, as he was wearing a forest green suit that matched my dress. I smiled at the fact someone had told him what I would be wearing.

“Why do you think I can do nothing on my own?” I ask, staring at him intently.

“I think you can do a lot independently, Kaitlyn, it’s just that, when you’re angry at someone, or holding a grudge, you’re terrible at doing things. Even with help,” Xander says, picking up the dress as he did so and unzipping it “I care about you, and want the best for you. So, what happened earlier with you and Jameson almost being caught. . . I want you to be able to be open about who you love. With the invisible rules your Father has set out for you, I will help you as much as I can in keeping your relationship a secret. Now, let me help you into this dress, or I will force you into this, and you’ll be fashionably late. Again,”

“I think I would like to give it a try first,” I say, grabbing the dress from Xander and trying to get into it.

I struggled. I could barely get one foot into it before falling. Luckily Xander caught me, and I pushed myself out of the dress. I looked at it, lying on the floor and I don’t know what it was, but I just walked away. I walked away from the dress and into the bathroom.

I closed the door and locked it. I sat down on the toilet. From there, I cried.

After a couple of minutes, I heard a knock followed by Xander talking.

“Kaitlyn,” He said and then went quiet.

I continued to sob as I heard a sliding sound on the other side of the door.

“Kaitlyn, until you open this door, I will sit here and wait. Even if that means I have to get Jameson up here, or your Father shouts at me,” Xander says and I hear him bang his head against the door.

“How would you even know where Jameson is?” I ask, sticking my head in my hands.

“She speaks!” Xander yells and I let out a small laugh “He told me yesterday when I was sneaking him out of the Castle that he would be here doing portraits at the ball to keep people interested, as well as you and your sisters not being bored out of your minds,”

I took a deep breath and stood up, unlocking the door. I opened it, clearly catching Xander by surprise as he fell through the door.

“Thank goodness you’re out! My butt was getting numb, and I don’t think I could sit here for hours on end, just waiting for you to come out of a bathroom,” Xander says and I give him a small smile “Now, you have a wonderful dress, that matches my very uncomfortably tight suit, and I want to get this night over and done with as soon as possible, so then I can get out of this suit,”

I smiled, walked over him and went over to my dress and started to try and get ready.

{----------}

When we arrived, it was only just on time. And when I say that, I mean, Father was giving me the looks of ‘how will this kingdom ever last with a queen like my own daughter?’ and I knew then, with what I had planned in my head for when Father had passed, he would be rolling in his grave.

As Xander and I walked down the stairs, I was hit by what felt like a wall of sound in my head. One that hadn’t been there before and it felt like a tuba was playing right into my ears.

I winced and Xander turned to look at me, a worried expression on his face.

“What’s wrong?” He asked as I tried to block out the other sounds of the ball surrounding me.

“I don’t know. I need to get to a quieter space to hear what’s going on in there,” I say, all my focus turning to what was happening in my head.

“The voices? They’re back?” He asked, a now deeply worried look on his face.

“Yes,” I say shortly, not bothering to give any sort of context to guests as they tried to greet the pair of us as Xander and I passed them on the way to a quieter room.

On our travels through the ballroom, I saw Jameson on the edge, painting Alice’s portrait. I watched them smile and laugh about something, and then she pointed to me with a smile on her face, glancing at Jameson as she did so.

Soon enough after though, I was briskly shoved into one of the study’s Father uses and I was plonked down into a chair.

“Now we’re in a quieter room, listen to the voices and nothing else,” Xander says, standing in front of me like listening to the voices would save a life.

“Well, I would be able to listen to them better if you would shut up,” I replied, sassing him.

I listen in as I hear Xander sass me back, but I don’t decipher what he says as I was concentrating too hard to make my mind do anything else.

“Use this warning wisely; you only have months to prepare before you rule.”

I sat there in a stunned silence as I listened to this. My Father only had months left to live and there was a high chance there was nothing I could do about it.

Xander saw my face drop as I retained the information I was hearing as the door to the study we were in slammed open when Jameson burst through it.

“I saw you two rush away to somewhere when Alice pointed you both out. So, I decided to follow you both and see where you went. You both went in and from what I could hear, it was deadly silent, so something is wrong and I want to know what,” Jameson rushes out as Xander stands up, expecting someone like my Father to have walked through.

“When we were walking down the stairs, Kaitlyn heard a fresh set of voices in her head,” Xander said, returning to his original position.

“I couldn’t hear them properly, so when Xander asked about what they said, and I said the room was too loud, he dragged me in here,” I said, brushing down my skirts and taking a deep breath, before looking Jameson in the eyes.

All I could see was pity and worry.

“So, what did they say?” Was all Jameson asked of me from there before walking towards me and lifting me so I could nuzzle into him as I spoke.

I took a deep breath before answering the question as it deeply worried me what both of them would do from my answer.

“They were saying how I should ‘use this warning wisely’ and that I only have ‘months to prepare before you rule’ and that was it. They were saying my Father is going to die in less than a year,”

Xander taps me on the shoulder so that I look at him.

“Could you give us an exact quote of what they said?” He asks and I nod my head.

“An exact quote of what the voices said is ‘Use this warning wisely; you only have months to prepare before you rule.’ so there, that’s what they said. You’re welcome,” Was all I said before trying to get up, but was held down by strong arms.

“So you’re saying there is a high chance you’re going to be a mother in less than a year?” Jameson asks me straight up.

“Yep,” Was all I said as I felt redness creep onto my face as I heard Xander snort.

“What are you laughing at?” I ask in confusion as I thought that Xander would be worried, not chuckling at the fact my Father would be dead soon.

“Oh, I’m not laughing at the fact your Father will be dead in a few months, I’m laughing at the fact, that in a few months, you two will have had intercourse and will probably still not have revealed your relationship, let alone be married,” He says.

“And why are you stating this?” I ask.

“Well, because if you have a child out of wedlock, especially after his Majesty is dead, everyone will call you things like ‘the slut queen’ among other things,” Xander replies, a slight grim look on his face, that was outcasted when the small smirk came through his facial expressions.

“Don’t you dare talk to Kaitlyn like that,” Jameson growls out at Xander, a snarl showing on his face and venom dripping from his words.

While the boys continued to growl at each other, I managed to slip out of the study and back up to my room where I found Alice pacing by the door.

“Alice, what are you doing here?” I asked in confusion as to why she wasn’t down at the ball, enjoying being the life of the party for once.

“Well, your boyfriend abandoned painting me to go check on you, so I slipped up here to make sure you didn’t disappear up here for the night. So, I’m telling you, go back downstairs, have fun and forget about it,” Alice rants as I stand there smiling before taking her hand and leading her back downstairs to where I found Xander and Jameson, running around, trying to find both of us.

“Finally found you,” Xander said, breathing out a sigh of relief as he hugged me, gave me a once-over and then did the same to Alice “I’m not losing you again, so I hereby command you to stay by your boyfriend all night. I don’t care if you two are caught. All I care about right now is that that doesn’t happen again,” He said and then calmed down a bit.

“I would like to say I’m not happy about this, but that would be a total lie,” I say before turning to Jameson and kissing him on the cheek “Now, come on, I want to have some fun tonight,”

So with that, I forgot my worries as the fun-filled night of dancing, laughs and giggles began, and Of course, there was some hiding from Father that happened as well.

The night had to end at some point though, and the last thing I can remember from tonight was that Jameson kissed me and then snuck out of my room before I went to bed.

The one thing that bothered me all night though, was the voices. I know the truth will come out at some point but can’t I just have one small bit of happiness for once?  

The answer is clearly no from the words that now keep me awake at night.

‘Use this warning wisely; you only have months to prepare before you rule.’  

[liopleurodean]

Season 7, Episode 20: The Girl With The Dungeons And Dragons Tattoo

That's awesome

Uh. Bobby?

Weird

Oh, good!

Great

Oh, that's fantastic

Yeah

Doesn't surprise me

That's... Wow

We're being domesticated

That's a nightmare

Charlie!

Yeah

That's just the cherry on top

Baby!!!

Near Chicago

That's just... so amazing

Indeed

She drives a Vespa?

Walking on Sunshine!

She looks so different from the rest

Yas, queen, work it!

A woman of taste

Dude. She has Pez dispensers of the entire Fellowship. I am in awe

She's got work buddies!

Wowww

Nah, he won't

I believe in her

Uh oh

Star Wars!

Big uh oh

Right

Uh...

She's got a GED and a give 'em hell attitude!!!

Right answer

That's kind of creepy

He means it

Three days? She was halfway there in five hours

Is this just fantasy?

Yeah

I mean, it's so fast for me to read, but it's not any worse than hacking I've seen in other shows, so...

WarGames!!!!! I love that movie!!!!

That's awesome, Frank

Oh, Dean and Charlie are gonna love each other

Eh...

Sorry, Bobby

Wake up, Charlie

Sure

Ooh! A beep!

Do it!

Heck yeah

Montage!

Kinda...

Poor guy

JOE BIDEN ASDFGHJKL

Run, Charlie. Run as fast as you can

Good excuse

Fandom saved her life

That won't help

Like holy water

The Winchesters!

Oh, boy

Corn-fed, huh?

Oh, yeah

Frank's cool like that

About a day

Yeah...

Dead serious

Ooh, nice background

Yay

Oh no

Very low

Yes! Absolutely take the Google job!

I really like her

And they can help

They've got it

Obviously

Interesting

Nah

Of course he does

Bobby!

Me too, Charlie

Aw

You got this, Charlie

Hermione!

True

There we go

Nice, Dean

It made a funky noise

Hey, I know a Charlene

She's acting off, though, she needs to act normal

Yeah, fair

Dang it, Bobby

She doesn't have time

Dean...

Yeah, this'll be fun

Not that simple

Dean.

That's actually awesome

Hey, there we go

Smooth

DEAN ASDFGHJKL

"this never happened" OH IT HAPPENED BUDDY

CHARLIE

Sam, you're gonna blow it

This is a trainwreck, I love it

And that's definitely Dean again. Powder her nose?

ASDFGHJKL

Definitely

Wow, that's just sad

That's definitely bad hacking, but okay

Uh oh

Bobby...

Dean knows that something is up

Oops

Good job, Charlie

Smooth

Yup

She's got this, Dean

That's why I love them

Now she looks somewhat normal

She's awesome

Oh, ew

Did that say Trump?

COURTESY OF MR. TRUMP

Oh yeah

This'll go well

Uh oh

This isn't good

Wait, what?

Ooh, flashback!

Clever

You're awesome, Charlie

Nice

Funky outfits!

Right

Yikes

I believe in you, Charlie

Is there something inside it?

What is she showing him?

Bobby...

Maybe

That's great

Poking is fun

Perseverance

He's acting too weird

She will not

That won't stop him, but it will delay him

Uh oh

Crap

Thank you, Bobby!

Run!

The boys!

Nah, she knows who her friends are

Now he can get his vengeance

I like this actor

Yup

She's probably got insurance, they could take her to a hospital

Um... fair? I guess?

Aw, okay

I believe it

Live long and prosper!

Oh yeah

Uh oh

Yeah, well...

Also, I really don't want to burn that flask

[aroaceconfessions]

Okay so this is the confession place for aroace people. Ummm so I may have done something to one of my parents. This was mostly unintentional. The parent was talking about crushes that the parent had when parent was younger. The crushes in question were of both girl and boy gender. Parent (to my knowledge) is hetero. I asked if parent was bi. Parent said parent had always liked both but was hetero. Uh sorry, I don't remember where I was going with this but um,,,,, This, I guess??? Currently also confused as to whether I'm actually aroace or just a very late bloomer. So I've never had a crush in my life and I don't really want one, but according to a parent (the very same one I talked about earlier) they're not something you can ask for or refuse. I also feel like crushes would just be a waste of time (for me, this doesn't necessarily apply to anyone else). I'm also a romantic according to the very same parent, but I still don't know what that means? Please tell me what it means. I mean, I love romances and close friendships in stories and cute romantic things, but just as long as I'm an outsider looking in. (Wow, that sounds really creepy haha. I don't actually mean it in a creepy way though!!) Sooo maybe I am aroace, maybe I'm not? Another thing, I got a few plants but for the life of me I absolutely cannot get them to stay alive :(. A bit sad about that. One of the other states of affairs in my strange life is the fact that my extended family on the other side of the world is bonkers! I feel like I'm watching a sitcom without the funny bits! I'm so glad I don't live near them! My little sister is also getting kind of weird around me :(. She has a best friend now who isn't me and they talk about everything (I could be wrong though). We're kind of growing apart and I don't like it :(((.

I also really want a cat.

Will I ever hit my rebellious teenager phase? I hope not. I love my parents and don't want to cause them any more anguish. They have a bunch to deal with already (including my bonkers extended family).

I'm kind of hungry now. maybe I should have lunch early?

Worried about college too. I need to take my SAT and apply and do a whole bunch of other stuff and I'm worried I won't be successful. I'm worried I'll fail my SAT, I'm worried I won't get into college, I'm worried I won't graduate college, I'm worried I won't find any jobs, I'm worried I won't be accepted by any jobs, I'm worried I'll hate my job, I'm worried I won't ever retire, I'm worried I'll fail life basically.

I'm also nonbinary (agender) and the same parent I've been talking about doesn't want me to come out publicly because parent says I'll "face many hardships and might get hurt/killed and I don't want that for my child". I mean, I get where parent is coming from, but dang, that's kind of a wild thing to say to a kid who has thousands of other things to worry about. Also I don't want to pretend I'm a girl for the rest of my life, that would suck so bad.

Oh another thing, racism sucks :(. I'm not white btw. When you get mad at brown people, you do not tell them to go back to their own country or some bull like that!! I mean I haven't experienced that yet, but both parents and sister have experienced things in that vein. I, however, have experienced so many little microaggressions (so has my sister D:<). For example when we go biking, one of the first things people ask us is "Are you from here?" or "Do you live near here?" I mean, come on! I know this is a mostly white neighborhood but you don't go around asking people those things! You never ask the white kids that! Don't pretend it's something you ask everyone! So rude!

Well I've been typing for about 20 minutes, maybe this is enough? No, I still have more to say.

I'm kind of tired of everything I deal with :(.

Also I hate what went down with Dobbs. The justices just yeeted our rights out the window, huh? Anyway reproductive rights should be protected on both the state and national levels.

More stuff,,, uhm,,,,,another confession... I am deeply uncomfy around republicans. They kinda just remind me of all the bad stuff.

Also I have no irl friends :(. (not counting my sister). Parent (yes, that one) says I'll make friends in college but I'm worried nobody will like me for who I am. When I was younger I had no problems being myself around other people, but now I just tailor my personality to fit other people because I want them to like me. I have no problems making 'friends' with people multiple times my own age, but making friends with people my own age is just difficult.

I'm also worried about the people I love dying because about 6 years ago, a close family member died. I also saw a post here that said you'd treat people better if you pretended everyone was going to die at midnight, and now sometimes I still can't shake the feeling that it might actually happen. I do try to be nice to everyone.

My sister says I'm too trusting of people, and I'm also too optimistic. Anxiety and optimism isn't the best combination haha.

My parents are nice, but they don't really understand all this stuff and everything I'm going through. For example, I told one of them I had anxiety and was believed! And then I told the other (yes, this is the parent who I've been griping about through the whole thing, the very same), but was told "no you don't have anxiety because other people get more worried than you". HGJK BVNKM SO FRUSTRATINGGG!!!

Also I'm half-convinced that parent (yes, that one) actually dislikes me?? :( The parent in question says parent wants what's best for me and stuff but I don't know...

Also the pandemic has taken a large toll on my mental health. Also the Roe v. Wade being killed thing. Also the midterm elections. Also climate change. Also capitalism. Also college stuff. Also being a human. I wish I was a jellyfish. Immortal jellies are really cool. Also Portuguese man-of-wars are cool. Also Sailor-by-the-seas. Jellyfish salad is pretty tasty though.

Sometimes I just wish the earth would swallow everyone else up and I'd be alone with the animals and Earth could start anew.

I wish life wasn't so complicated.

Also I got a therapist recently, she's helping a bit. She told me I have anxiety (not a surprise). She said I may also have ADHD too (also not a surprise).

Anyway, if you read the whole thing, have a nice day!!! Even if you didn't, you can have this ->❤<-

~ (:)Anon(:)

[swluminekin]

Initial Report: ALTR 1011395

Observation of ALTR 1011395 (The heck is with all these numbers? Seriously!)

Status: Currently Undetained (like I’d let you get your hands on me. I KNOW ABOUT THINGS!)

Safety Level: Undetermined (again, as if I’d let you get near me)

Description:

ALTR 1011395 (You know I know what that spells out right?) is a humanoid female, (WOMAN! I am a WOMAN you idiots!) late-20s to mid-30s in appearance. Subject (She. Call me “she”) has fair skin, eye coloration in the spectrum of light blue to green range (the joys of recessive genes!) and hair pigmentation which is normally a darker blonde in coloration but seems to change from time to time. (It’s called hair dye? Have you never heard of it?) Height appears to be in the five foot range, though on the shorter side. (I am 5′5″ thank you very much.) Subject appears to dress in casual garments for the public however appears to dress in the attire known as “lounge wear” when in private. (The hell are you doing looking in on me in my home, perverts!)

ALTR 1011395 (SAY MY NAME DANG IT!!!) appears to exhibit multiple abilities ranging from empathy to precognition/clairvoyance. (I mean, doesn’t everyone to some degree? It’s called deja vu for a reason.) They have also shown to have some form of mimicry ability as well some field researchers having notice them using some form of healing ability on other people. (Wait, what? Those people were watching me? That’s why I’ve been feeling so gross) It is unknown if subject has any other traits or abilities of concern, however updates and addendums shall be added in the future should any be witnessed. (Aww... little researchers can’t figure out anything else? Shame they can’t see some of the things in front of their faces.)

ALTR 1011395 has shown to have knowledge of past and current subjects, including ALTR 114209. (You guys are idiots! You’re HIS freaking test subjects now, not the other way around!) Subject seems to be protective of certain subjects, having said they would find and harm anyone who would wish harm on those they know. (Any of them but Anti. Fuck that. You can keep him.) Subject is protective and easily agitated when certain phrases or items of interest are uttered. Can also be easily distracted, however has been known to come back to the original topic eventually. (It’s called ADHD. I know I have it, just never been actually tested.) Subject also appears to have various forms of crafts they are interested in, appearing to change the form of craft they are interested in from time to time. (What? It’s strange to like to make things?)

Subject has been known to react adversely to extreme heat and frigid temperatures. (So I hate the heat and the cold... like that’s a thing?) 1011395 has been seen avoiding public spaces as well as various forms of confrontation. Researchers have been advised to continue study of the subject before detainment, questioning and application of the Dr. Hopkins Assessment. (Like hell you’re finding me!)

ADDENDUM 1: ALTR 1011395 appears to have learned techniques of avoidance as how the most recent data is from approximately two weeks ago. Subject’s whereabouts are currently unknown and has appeared to vanished from all locations they have frequented in the past. Researchers and heads of staff are currently in meetings as to future study and detainment of 1011395.

ADDENDUM 2: [A video pops up as a link is clicked. It shows a blank room with a black chair with it’s back to the camera. On the chair sits a person in a non-descript bulky red hoodie with green and blue sleeves and the hood up, also with their back to the camera. A heavy, distorted sigh is heard, revealing there is a voice modifier on the video.]

You haven’t found me, and it’s for a reason. I don’t want you to find me. There are some of us gifted people who don’t want to be found by you. We’ve heard, about what you do to people like us. You test us, push us, torture us. For what reason? So you can be ready for us “freaks” to be able to imprison us in the future? Groups like you try to play the good guy but in the end we know the truth.

[The figure turns to the side, face obscured by a full face mask, blue and green in coloration but otherwise non-descript. The arms fold, revealing gloved hands as they do so.]

We know about the father you took - Chase Brody. We know about the mental and emotional torture you put him through over those seven days. We know about “the others” that you spoke to him about. Others with gifts - other “ALTR” subjects. You hold so many prisoners not realizing who they are what you are dealing with. You can keep ALTR 114209 - or “Anti” as those of us on the outside call him - but it will be your own undoing. You found that out the hard way at that particular facility.

Just know that those of us who are still uncontained are watching you now. And we have allies who are keeping an eye out for what you may do in the future.

[The head of the figure turns to the camera. The fabric on the sleeves moves, as if being gripped by the hands hidden under the folded arms.]

We will get the innocent out. It’s only a matter of time before you know who we are.

[The video cuts out.]

ADDENDUM 2.5: Systems have been hacked by unknown source using codes and techniques unfamiliar to IRIS. Attempts to locate origin have returned unsuccessful. Subject in video uses voice changer but seems to identify themselves as a subject we have observed, presumably ALTR 1011395. Subject reveals to know about several ALTR subjects, but refers to 114209 as well the anomaly Chase Brody. Precautions will be taken in the future when handling ALTR 1011395. (Good. Because I won’t be the only one you’ll be dealing with.)

[here4theheartbreak]

What a dang fiasco I’ve had this morning 😂

So I got scheduled for a consult for a hysterectomy months ago, like early June? For the end of September, which was the first opening this particular doctor had - she’s really popular in my area and one of the only ones in my clinic network that supports hysterectomies for trans patients.

I got a call at the end of last week from the intake nurse (literally Friday afternoon, what timing). She informs me that I need 2 letters of support for a hysterectomy. One can be my regular counselor, but one has to be a PsyD or a PhD in a relevant field. My appointment is just over a month away at this point.

Where I live, we don’t have a multitude of PhD/PsyD level practitioners. It’s a bit of an issue actually - but it’s never been an issue for me because I’ve never needed one. Until now. There are only a chunk in network, and just a handful of these providers that are actually willing to provide letters of support for trans people’s surgeries. Most require 3+ sessions, or even upwards of a few months of sessions to establish a relationship with their client before they are comfortable writing said letter. 

And, while I’m not required to have the letter at the consult next month, it’s highly recommended. I’ve already got my counselor’s letter - but how - with only a month’s notice - am I supposed to get a PsyD letter? 🙃

And I know, it is all my own fault, I should have studied the WPATH standards closer and realized that hysto requires this additional letter. That is my fault - I assumed it would be the same as top surgery - especially since one is outwardly changing the body, and one is a pretty common procedure for people internally. Especially considering I’m nearing middle age, I’ve already given birth, I have no spouse and 0 want to bear another child (and haven’t since having Nik - it’s just not a desire I have ever had). And because of my dysphoria I can’t go on birth control (the non-estrogen ones make my body freak out, and the estrogen ones mess with my dysphoria) - so realistically it makes sense to yank the offending organs. But that’s never the case and it’s never that easy lol - so that is my fault.

But still. A little heads up, even a letter regarding requirements a few weeks earlier, would have been a life saver. The nurse emailed me a packet that they already had set up of possible providers (though I learned today it is not up to date) and other requirements - why not email that a few weeks after scheduling the appointment? Give folks a heads up that actually allows enough time to establish care with a provider who’s hard to get into?

So I spent my morning between work clients calling various clinics in my network, awkwardly explaining who I was, what I needed, and why I needed it six times (never gets easier, never gets less anxiety inducing, especially in today’s America).

Finally I did manage to get an appt with a provider who is PhD in a related field (urology, humorously enough, qualifies lol) - it’s 9/8 -- so about 20 days before my consult. I’m hoping he’ll do the letter with only 2 or 3 visits, otherwise I might have to push things back further and I really don’t want to do that. I’d rather just get everything done and out of the way end of this year/early next, especially given the current political climate regarding trans individuals. I’d like to get things as set in stone gender wise as I can before 2024. (Hell, before the SC comes back and there’s a risk of our already minimal protections being challenged).

So just kind of a rant post, I needed to get all of it out to hopefully get the stress/anxiety nerves out of my system and be able to finish my work day lol.

[franstastic-ideas]

Sour-Apple-Studios has just revealed that we're nearing the end of Horrotale, only about 20 more pages left, and I am SO HYPE! I know you don't follow the canon (your version has NOTHING in common with canon besides basic premise, especially Sans who could not be further from canon Horror!Sans, I'm actually curious how you came up with him), but I'm wondering if you could please share some more of your Horrortale headcanons to celebrate? Pretty please?

Ohh, what a wonderful success for canon Horrortale! It's always sad when a story ends, but at the same time there's this sense of satisfaction that you now know it's complete? Unless the ending sucks out loud (Star vs. the Forces of Evil deserved better!).

Ok, so I know, I KNOW my interpretation of Horrortale is extremely different from what's canon, and I knew that my HT!Sans couldn't be further away from his official incarnation.

As for how Pacifist Horrortale came to be, I suppose it all began when I wondered if the famine that turned the Underground into a hellhole could still happen in other timelines aside from True Pacifist.

And then I pondered how horribly tragic it would be if Frisk had left on the best terms with everyone, only to return years later to find some of her friends have died and the others barely put together and quite a few almost completely out of their gourd.

The idea grew from there, and that's how Pacifist Horrortale was made - an AU where all of the monsters in Horrortale's Underground love and adore Frisk, but she's constantly in danger of them succumbing to their madness and never-ending hunger.

Now let's talk about Sans's personality here - this IS a Frans blog, so of course he's gonna fall in love with Frisk. She stayed a while in the Underground, maybe a few months before leaving with a promise to one day free them all.

Sans wanted so badly to tell her how he felt before she left, but by the time he mustered up his courage and decided to run to the barrier, she was already gone.

Then about six months later, Toriel fell down and dusted, leaving Undyne to take the throne while the former Captain of the Royal Guard was still grieving. Then the famine happened...

One day in a fit of stress and anger, Undyne accidentally struck Sans's skull, permanently damaging him. The Underground went to hell in a handbasket, and all he wanted was for Frisk to return and make everything better again.

His longing for her to come back and that growing longing turning into a sort of insanity was greatly inspired by The Rebellion Story. So many of Homura's lines pertaining to Madoka could fit seamlessly into Pacifist Horrortale's narrative:

"my emotions have all come back to haunt me. i can't remember anything but glimmers of light and regret. ah, so this is... my despair. frisk... thank you for coming all the way to a place like this. i'm sorry i couldn't even say 'goodbye' to you in the end..."

This movie, dang it... This movie...