#Hyunjin fanfiction

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hiii! so i saw your post about the prompts so a random number i would say 81 with hyunjin

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Writing Prompt 81 - A prince sleeps with the pirate captain to get them out of the city AU - Hyunjin

Word count: 4.7k words

Wattpad | AO3

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Writing Prompt 81: A prince sleeps with the pirate captain to get them out of the city AU – Hyunjin

~

��So, how much longer until we’d get to the Capital?” Seraphine asks, her eyes burning with excitement, auburn as her hair.

“We’re almost there, Captain. Should be getting there in about 3 days’ time. If not for this storm…” One of her subordinates – Felix – answers, briefly glancing outside through the small round window in Seraphine’s cabin.

“It’s fine. We’ve sailed on rougher waters. Ah, I can’t wait to see the Capital. They say it’s the most beautiful city in the continent. I can already picture us roaming around and taking everything we deserve. Do you think ships can sink from too much gold on board?” She chuckles with amusement.

“I doubt it, Miss.” Felix chuckles.

“I’ve heard the Capital is famous for their rare spices. Saffron and anise are native to this part of the continent, after all. We need to make sure to get our hands on them to get even richer once we live this place.” Seraphine contemplates out loud.

“We’re not even there yet and you’re already thinking of what to do when we leave.”

“Why, of course! I need to know what our next move is, always.”

“That’s why we’ve chosen you to be Captain, Miss.”

“Anyway.” She waves her hand around dismissively. “Any news on the imperial navy? I hope those plans still stand and we’d be able to get to the port without any fights.”

“I hope so too.” He chuckles. “They shouldn’t be stationed near the port unless they’ve discovered it. It’s quite stressful, isn’t it?”

“Yeah. But we need to do this, Lix.”

“I know…” Felix looks away briefly. “We’ll take our revenge, don’t worry. Those bastards will pay for what they did to our families.”

“We’ll make sure of that.” Seraphine nods.

“I’m afraid we’re biting off more than we can chew, though…” He hesitates.

“I’m not. This is what we’ve prepared for our whole lives, Felix.” She reassures him, and both of them stay in silence as the ship goes through the large waves, passing through the thunderstorm.

~

Fortunately, the pirate ships arrived at the secret port safely, and all the plans Seraphine’s father made were still actual.

It’s the perfect moment to strike, when news of the King falling ill started spreading throughout the continent. Seraphine knows this is the best time to cause havoc and steal to her heart’s content, to take back just a little bit of what the Kingdom took away from her family.

Her father used to be a simple man, working on fishing boats to bring in the Capital’s largest supply of fresh seafood, and, if lucky, of oysters and pearls. He was an honest, respectable worker, always on time to deliver the goods no matter the season, but although he was respected throughout the Capital, he was still just that. A regular man.

His demise was falling in love with a woman. Seraphine’s mother was part of one of the most elite families of the Kingdom, who, of course, would’ve never accepted a poor man dating, let alone marrying one of their daughters.

Her father fought tooth and nail for their love, and so did Seraphine’s mother, but when she fell pregnant out of wedlock, her family turned their backs on her and started interfering with his work. He got fired in no time, and no matter where he’d try to find a job to feed his pregnant girlfriend, he would get rejected.

Her mother was faced with two choices: give birth to the baby and give it away in order to be allowed back into her family – although her chances of marrying a reputable man were non-existent to say the least, considering her past history – or give up on her life as nobility and struggle. She chose the latter.

With no job in sight and a family to feed, Seraphine’s father had to resort to critical measures. He began working off the books on a couple of smaller ships, and when even that failed to bring in enough gold, he had to do something else. He found a band of pirates willing to take him in due to his experience on the sea.

He became part of their crew in no time and things were good for a while. Despite fighting his principles of being honest, he embraced his new lifestyle of stealing and smuggling goods in and out of the Capital. The happiness didn’t last much, though, because when the King found out of all the misdemeanours caused by the pirates, he banished them all from the Capital. He was forced to run away with Seraphine’s mother, who was 8 months pregnant at the time.

Times were rough, and the seas were even rougher. With no proper care and no possibility to access any type of healthcare on land, Seraphine’s mother died giving birth to her, and her father, blinded by grief, swore on his life that he will take revenge on everyone who turned their backs on them: the nobility, the Kingdom… he swore to come back one day and wreck as much of the Capital as he could.

Grief is a way too profound emotion… it wraps time. Her father got stuck in this never-ending circle of hatred, his life ambition becoming solely taking revenge. He ended up becoming Captain of the pirates and grew their riches as much as he could, in order to ensure having a formidable fleet to return secretly to the Capital.

He planned and planned for years, each crew member aware of his schemes and totally on board, as all of them held a grudge against the nobility. They all shared similar stories, similar fates.

However, life is sometimes way too short to fulfil all your plans, and Seraphine’s father ended up losing his after an on-going battle with a mysterious sickness that rendered him bed-ridden in the last years of his life.

Even after he was gone, the pirates’ hatred still remained, and his ambitions lived on. Seraphine ended up following in her father’s steps, becoming the youngest Captain this band of pirates has ever had, and ever since, they’ve began crafting their plan together, building from where her father left off.

They would start slow, a couple of petty thefts here and there, until they’d make their way to the larger businesses and burn them to the ground.

The plan was almost flawless, and with the pirates finally back in the Capital after more than 20 years away, they were ready to execute it. It’d be the biggest they’d ever strike.

~

“Feels good to step on land after so many months.” Seraphine exclaims, stretching her limbs.

“Right? Ahh, I missed it.” Felix smiles sincerely. “I can’t believe we’re finally here.”

“Don’t go too far, Lix. You and I need to stay near the ships, alright?”

“Got it, Miss!” Felix reassures, but still ends up disappearing after a while.

He’s always been a curious child, Seraphine knows, and even if he is already 24, he still acts childish, unfit for his age.

She could never blame him for it, though. The only thing they've ever known was how to live on a ship, so the Capital is bound to be interesting enough and make him want to explore to his heart's content.

~

Thanks to the secret port her father informed them of, all their ships were safely anchored, giving the pirates the opportunity to go in the Capital as they pleased.

And so, they did. In just a few weeks, they stole goods and food, jewellery, and so much gold, they could simply go back to the seas and starts anew in another Kingdom. Seraphine’s eyes sparkle at the thought of all the gold they’ve taken, and she is truly impressed with her people.

However, she is quite surprised that the imperial army is finding it so hard to find the culprits and the reason of their economy plummeting, and she vaguely remembers her father’s warnings that the King is truly sharp, and he’d figure out quickly. With them still able to be in the Capital almost a month after they arrived, she realises that the rumours must be true. He must’ve truly fallen sick.

~

“Miss, the imperial army has discovered the port.” Felix rushes in her cabin as Seraphine is admiring the jewels they’ve managed to steal so far.

“Took them long enough.” She chuckles.

“What will we do?” He is anxiously pacing back and forth. “They brought this letter-”

“Let me see.” She snatches it from his hand and notices the imperial seal.

Opening it hastily, she lets out a laugh.

“What?” Felix asks with a chuckle.

“They apparently don’t want to fight us. They must be afraid we’d make a fool out of them. They proposed a treaty.”

“Really?!” He gasps.

“Let me write a reply and invite the King here.” She laughs again and begins drafting a reply. “If they want to talk us out of the Capital so badly, let’s meet them.”

She writes a list of demands for the King that she doubts would be met. 5000 gold coins – enough money to last them for generations – a couple of jewels, permits to enter the Capital whenever they pleased and the opportunity to trade honestly, without stealing, and most importantly an apology. She feels like everything they’ve caused so far throughout the Capital is enough, but she doubts the pirates’ negative feelings are settled.

An apology from the King would suffice, maybe.

She hands Felix the envelope, and to her surprise, another letter comes the very next day, with the royals accepting a negotiation.

~

“Miss, the King is not here. His son is.” Felix informs her, making her raise an eyebrow.

“The prince?" She asks, and Felix nods. "Alright. Let’s do this.” She stands up. “Guide him here. No guards.”

She is once again surprised that they accepted this rule when she sees the Prince step inside her chambers. He is either a fool or willing to grant her everything she’s asked for. She shall see.

“Hello.” He smiles shortly as he enters, and the first thing Seraphine notices about him is his beauty. He looks elegant and proud, and she’s never seen anyone look this good before.

She’s used to people looking rough. This man, however, is the exact opposite. He looks like the prince you’d read about in fairytales, his black hair styled to perfection, his clothes immaculately white and gold, and his crown steadily on top of his head.

Truly a sight to behold that takes her breath away momentarily. However, she must represent her people, so she won’t stray away, no matter how handsome this man looks like.

“Good day.” Seraphine smiles as well, showing him to a chair. Of course, she doesn’t bow. He might be a royal, but he is on her ship, so she holds the most power.

She almost wants to ask him to bow to her instead, but this thought brings a chuckle to her lips, so she refrains from making such demands.

“I’m a busy man, so I’ll get straight to the point.”

“Not so fast.” She laughs. “What’s your name? I must know who I’m speaking to.”

“Hwang Hyunjin.” The Prince speaks. “To whom do I owe the pleasure?”

“So proper.” She chuckles yet again. “Name’s Seraphine. Now that we got acquainted, please, go ahead. I’m all ears.”

“We’ve analysed your… proposal. And we’re willing to meet some of them, to a certain point.”

“Which is?”

“2000 gold instead of 5000. You’re asking for an absurd sum. Besides, I’m quite certain you’ve already gotten more than enough jewels to sell abroad, considering by what you’re currently wearing.” Hyunjin points to her neck and arms, adorned with multiple necklaces with various precious gems that sparkle brightly even in the dim light of her cabin.

She intentionally decided to dress up for this meeting: a short skirt and a ruffled white blouse with a generous neckline, jewels all over her body – not only around her neck, but also on her thighs, ankles and wrists – just to show him how much they’ve taken, and to send the message that they could take so much more.

“Hmm…” She contemplates. “I shall think about it. What else?”

“The passes for the Capital… I am unable to grant you that. A pass means freedom to conduct business, as you are aware, but a bunch of thieves shouldn’t have that.” He replies with a fake smile, his words spitting poison.

“Thieves?” Seraphine laughs once more. “Hyunjin, darling, almost every person on board my ship used to be an honest working member of your Kingdom. But your father, who, as I can see, hasn’t bothered to grace us with his presence today, made sure that none of them can call this place home anymore. I am simply asking you for the rights you’ve taken away from us. Some of my people still have families they’ve been unable to meet due to this… ostracising by your father.”

“My dear,” he counters, ��as you might be aware since you’ve struck at the perfect time, the King is gravely ill. Our Kingdom needs stability, which is why I’ve even considered some of your ridiculous demands. I’d say you should accept them. We’re giving you much more than you deserve, anyway.”

“Hyunjin, let’s not be rash.” She smiles. “It’s clear to me that we are in a very interesting power imbalance here. You’ve come here to ask for my help, to leave your city alone. I am willing to do just that. I don’t want anything to do with your rotten Capital. However, for my crew, I am willing to turn a blind eye from everything you’ve done, as long as you give them the opportunity to come back here if they wish.”

“Seraphine, don’t fool yourself, please. My army could defeat all of you in just a couple of days. Do you really want a blood bath? I am willing to apologise to your crew on behalf of my father. This is why I decided to come here unguarded in the first place. However, be rational. We can’t possibly give you that sum of money, jewels, and on top of that, passes to the Capital. You can pick those that are the most valuable to you and your crew, and I shall promise you in return that no blood will be shed unnecessarily.”

“Who knew such a pretty mouth could spew so much bullshit?” She stands up and walks towards him. “Hyunjin, darling, you’re the soon-to-be king of this Kingdom. You can give me anything, can’t you?” She asks cunningly, a smirk adorning her lips.

“As long as you keep things rational, I could. But just so you know, the fact that I came here in the first place goes against everything I’ve been advised. I want to rule differently, not through war and endless battles. Let us not fight, dear. Leave my city quietly, won’t you?”

He doesn’t move at all in his chair as she approaches him, his confidence quite alluring.

“Let’s do it a bit differently, then. You will give my people passes to the Capital, and instead of giving me gold and jewels, how about…”

Seraphine raises her hand and touches his crown, slowly taking it off Hyunjin’s head.

To her surprise, he lets her do whatever she pleases, so she doesn’t hesitate to put it on her own head.

“This should sell for a pretty penny somewhere.” She finishes, leaning back and supporting her weight against her desk.

Hyunjin stands up and grabs her hand, looking into her eyes, and she feels a rush travel throughout her body at the sudden touch.

“My crown?” He laughs.

She straightens her back and faces him properly, their bodies so close, she can feel his breath on her lips.

“Mhm. I’ve always liked gold and beautiful jewels, and your crown has just that. It’s so pretty, darling.”

Hyunjin smirks and leans in closer, whispering in her ear.

“As long as you give me your word that you’d stop terrorizing my people, I could give you so much, dear. Even if you are a thief, I’m certain your word weighs something.”

She looks up and meets his eyes once more, placing her hands on his collar and holding tightly.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” He warns.

“Hyunjin, you might be a prince, but your rules don’t apply on my ship.” She smirks. “I have more power than you in this very moment, you should know.”

Touching royals is prohibited, but she couldn’t care less about their meaningless rules that only work in their favour. She dislikes inequality. Even if she is the Captain of her ships, they’ve always treated each other as equals, and everyone is deserving of respect no matter their status.

“You’re quite outspoken. As expected of a pirate.” Hyunjin replies, smirking himself.

“And you’re quite confident, as expect of a royal.” She scoffs.

“You know, if the crown wouldn’t suit you that well, I would’ve been quite upset by this blatant disrespect. However, I can’t help but notice your beauty, dear Seraphine.”

“Oh, my. I’m flattered.” She jokes. “You don’t look so bad yourself, prince.”

“So, what will it take after all to get you out of my Kingdom, sweetheart?”

“Are you trying to flirt with me to get me to leave?” She lets out a chuckle. “It’s not gonna work, sweetheart. I’ve told you my updated terms. Passes and an official apology for my people and this crown. You can keep your gold and jewellery. See? I’m willing to negotiate with you.”

“Is that so?” He chuckles. “Does it give you a rush of power to wear my crown? I bet it feels really good.” As he says this in a menacing tone, he brings his face even closer, making a jolt travel through Seraphine’s body.

He is way too close, intoxicatingly close, and despite the fact that they are enemies, she can’t deny the effect he apparently has on her body. But still, she didn’t come here to play, and besides hatred and possible desire, there’s no other feelings between them.

“It does, I won’t lie. Is this how you feel when you wake up in the morning and put it on your pretty head? Do you spend a lot of time in front of the mirror admiring yourself?” She mocks, making sure to use the same condescending tone he’s been using by calling her pet names.

Hyunjin doesn’t move away. On the contrary, he stays close, putting his hands on top of hers that are still on his collar, forcing her to let go of his clothes. He guides her hands down and keeps holding onto her fists as he looks her in the eyes with the same determination she’s showing him.

“Why, is this what you’re going to do every day if I give you my crown?” He chuckles. “And here I thought you wanted to sell it, beautiful.”

“I don’t know, Hyunjin. It might give me a rush, but do you know what truly makes me delighted? The thought of all the money I’ll make once I sell these jewels I’ve stolen.”

As she says this, she snatches her hand away from his and brings it to her neck, making sure to drag her fingers deliberately slowly over the golden necklace right on top of her décolletage.

Hyunjin’s eyes follow her movements closely, as the hand that previously rested on top of hers finds its way to her waist.

“Passes for a handful of your people – not all of them – and my apology.” He speaks, his eyes darting back to hers.

“A handful of them?”

“The ones that directly attacked the Capital won’t be allowed to stay here. I hope you understand my reasoning, but no one would feel comfortable knowing that they’re trading with a bunch of pirates that previously stole their goods.”

Seraphine thinks long and hard for a few moments. Despite having an advantage over Hyunjin, she knows that this wouldn’t last much longer. She is still facing the most powerful army of the continent, and it’s a surprise that Hyunjin wanted to talk in the first place.

If they were to fight the imperial army, they might win a few battles, but at what cost? They would eventually end up losing everything they worked for, and God knows they’ve already caused a lot of damage, even more than they were initially expected.

Being a leader is tough, and although Seraphine wants to believe in her people’s victory over everything else, she must be realistic. They’ve already gotten way more than they hoped for.

Being a leader means knowing when to back down.

“… Fine.” She says after a while. “Passes for some of my people and an apology sounds reasonable enough.”

“I knew we would eventually see eye to eye.” He smiles.

“And your crown.” Seraphine adds, Hyunjin’s expression becoming more amused.

“No.” He shakes his head. “A kiss.”

“A kiss?” She laughs in disbelief. “I don’t want that from you, Hyunjin.”

“Seraphine, with how you’ve been looking at me for the past thirty minutes, I’d say you’re right. You’d like way more than that, wouldn’t you?”

He moves the hand from her waist up, until he cups her right breast, and with his other hand still holding onto her fist, he raises her arm and guides it around his neck.

“Says you, who’s been invading my personal space for the past 10 minutes.” She laughs.

“You don’t seem to mind.” Hyunjin counters.

“It seems to me you’re the one who’s hoping for that kiss.” Seraphine smirks cunningly. “And with how comfortable you seem to be touching me, tell me, prince, should I give it to you?”

Hyunjin chuckles, and everything happens swiftly. His mouth falls on Seraphine’s, who’s kissing him back and bringing him closer, her fingernails digging in the skin of his nape.

He lets out a soft moan as she bites his bottom lip, his hands moving to her waist to raise her on the desk. It’s not the most comfortable place to make out on, but it provides enough comfort to allow Hyunjin to press his upper body against her even closer as their kiss deepens.

He places one of his hands firmly against her thigh, right on top of her jewellery, and squeezes tightly.

Seraphine gets slightly frustrated with how difficult it is to take the Prince’s clothes off – the million buttons she has to undone, which she feels are so unnecessary. Why does the nobility want to dress up so proper, she wonders?

In contrast, her ruffled blouse is quick to fly off her body, leaving her naked and exposed, if not for the many necklaces and jewels adorning her chest.

“My darling, you are indeed a beautiful pirate princess.” Hyunjin breaks the kiss to admire her as she leans back on the desk.

“Oh, yeah?” She chuckles. “Why don’t you do your duty and kneel in front of this princess, then?”

The power dynamics strikes her once more, giving her another rush as Hyunjin kneels down in front of her, raising her skirt and removing her panties slowly.

He begins kissing his way up her thighs, spreading her legs apart and connecting his mouth to her core, licking stripes skilfully as she rolls her head back and moans.

“My fucking God, you’re sweet.” He compliments, revelling in her taste, his tongue drawing circles on her bundle of nerves, listening to her hurried breaths and making sure to give her pleasure.

“You’re quite good with words, who knew you’d be so good with your tongue, too?” She compliments back, when his tongue moves inside her opening, preparing her for what’s to come.

“Do you like my tongue that much, pirate? Will you let go for me?”

“It takes more than that to make me come, Prince.” She chuckles lowly. “Why don’t you come over here and show me what else you’re capable of?”

“So demanding.” He laughs. “I shall.”

He stands straight and unbuckles his belt, removing his white trousers and taking out his hardened dick. He doesn’t hesitate to press it against her pussy, making her lick her lips in anticipation, and with a swift motion, he bottoms out into her.

“Fuck, you’re so tight.” He groans. “You take me so well though.”

“Come on, Hyunjin, don’t stall.” She commands, and with another chuckle, Hyunjin listens and begins setting a steady pace, moving his hips perfectly to graze her sweet spot with each push of his cock inside of her.

“Shouldn’t feel this good.” Hyunjin closes his eyes shut, trying his hardest not to cum first, but Seraphine is sure making it difficult with her nails scratching his arms softly.

“It does, though.” She affirms, letting out a moan as she feels herself getting closer. “Keep that up, will you? I’m almost- oh, God!” She exclaims letting her head fall back once more, welcoming the bliss of orgasm.

Seeing this beautiful sight, Hyunjin can’t hold back any longer, and he ends up releasing himself with a final push and a loud groan.

As he separates himself from her, he pulls her up to kiss her one last time before both of them start getting dressed.

“I think it’s time to sign on your promises, Prince.” Seraphine says, her breath still hurried and her cheeks slightly flushed.

She stands up and grabs a piece of paper, beginning to draft a contract between her and the Prince. She makes sure to include every term they’ve spoken about – except for the crown, which she realises was a way too big power play – and when both parties seem satisfied, Hyunjin signs and stamps his seal.

“I believe an apology is due. Bring out your crew on the deck.”

They both exit the room together, moment when Hyunjin’s guards and Felix run to them.

“Negotiations took longer than expected. I was almost about to barge in.” Felix says, his face worried, but noticing Seraphine’s mild expression, he grows calm.

“Felix, please bring out everyone, the Prince has an announcement to make.”

~

Keeping true to his word, Hyunjin apologizes in front of everyone on behalf of his father, and informs Seraphine’s crew that they are welcome in the Kingdom, as long as they give their word to stop causing havoc.

To her surprise, her people’s hearts are settled with this, and most of her crew decides to reject the offer of staying in the Kingdom for good. However, knowing that they are welcomed back whenever, they thank the Prince for his consideration and bow to their Captain, pledging loyalty and thanking her for making this possible.

“So, I guess this is it.” Hyunjin turns to Seraphine. He wants to grab her hand and touch her one last time, however, with so many eyes on them, he refrains to do so, but she is able to read some sort of longing in his eyes that she can’t quite put her finger on.

“Let us never see each other again, then.” She nods with a sweet smile, grateful that she finally completed her father’s mission.

She is finally a free woman, devoid of any obligations.

She is free.

“Will you ever come back?” Hyunjin asks, his tone slightly hopeful.

“Why, do you think you’ll miss me?” She chuckles. “I thought you said I should leave this city and never return.”

“Well… I did say that. However, in case you decide to visit the Capital again… you know where to find me.”

“Should I request an audience to meet His Highness, then?” She smirks.

“No.” He shakes his head. “This shall suffice.”

With these words, he takes off his crown and places it on top of her head, leaving her speechless.

“If you don’t sell this, showing it to my guards should be enough. They’ll know you’re not a foe.”

“Thank you, Prince. I shall think about not selling it, then.”

They smile briefly before they both nod at each other, and with this, Hyunjin takes his leave.

Seraphine turns to her crew with a genuine smile adorning her lips, and addresses them warmly. These people decided to follow her, to trust her, and to stay by her side even if the Prince offered them a place in the Kingdom, which she couldn’t be more grateful for.

“It’s time for us to go. Our job here is done.”

~

As her crew prepares for departure, Seraphine rests her hands on her ship’s railing, watching the vast sea that awaits them with awe.

She wonders if she will ever come back, if she will ever see Hyunjin again, and she thinks about the crown resting in her treasures chest where she locked it securely.

She doesn’t think she will have the heart to sell it, after all.

~The End~

[amethystwrytes]

I’m glad you didn’t mind being tagged lol I typed your @ and then was like “they never said explicitly they wanted to be tagged but they do read it….” And after I fought myself I decided to @ you lmaoooo

And all I can say is strap in bae bc shit is going to hit the fan only two chapters left 😬😬😬

I adore your take on things and they always brighten my day (evidently literally bc it was cloudy out a second ago and now I can’t see the screen bc of the sun lmao). Thank you for reading and sticking around with me on this crazy ride 💙🫂💙🫂

Safe (Part Seven)

Pairing: Hwang Hyunjin X Fem. Reader X Lee Minho

Summary: A broke ER Nurse offers up her services to a large crime organization in exchange for much higher pay and benefits that are unconventional, but lucrative. The life proves to be questionable at best, and downright isolating at worst which leaves her feeling unsure, unstable and dangerous. 

Warnings: Explicit language. Explicit depictions of sex (some chapters will be more explicit than others sexually). Violence. Blood. Trauma injuries. (Organized) Crime. Emotional manipulation. Discussion of murder and physical assault. Medical inaccuracy galore. Smoking. Past addiction. 18+ Only MDNI.

Chapter WC: 3.5K

~ Part Seven ~ (Series M. List Here)

Two vibrant, undeniably visible pink lines scream at you from the bathroom countertop. 

“What does it say?” Seungmin hobbles up behind you. 

“Get out! God, you fucking leech! I’m literally staring at a plastic stick dripping with my piss here, can I get a minute to myself?!” you scream and shove him out the door, he stumbles back and hits the opposite wall with a thud as you slam and lock the bathroom door. 

“I guess I’ll take that as a positive then!” he yells, “Hormonal asshole! I’ve just been shot in the leg today, no big deal!” you hear him hobble back down the hallway. 

Actually it’s a double positive, since you’ve taken two tests. One might be a dud, right? It happens. It’s possible. You, as a nurse, had personally never seen a false positive on a pregnancy test, but you hear things, right? It’s happened. So you squeezed out a little more pee for test #2, after all, that’s probably why they give you two in a box anyhow. Yet even with barely enough urine to soak the stupid scratchy tip of the test, the lines were so clearly there that you had no choice but to believe them. 

“Fuck.” 

The word comes out in a choked sob as you sit back down on the toilet, your face in your hands. 

How? You are a fucking nurse. How did you let this happen? 

Working at the hospital had always had its perks, like how you could just drop into gynecology, sign a paper, and have the nurse give you your shot, most of the time it was someone you knew and were friendly with. It was convenient, it was easy, you were able to do it on your breaks for goodness sake. You never made an appointment or anything, so there wouldn’t be any kind of reminder from the office to come back to stay on schedule. Evidently you were the type of person who needed them though, because here you sit on a toilet, in a house that doesn’t belong to you, pregnant with…

With whose fucking child? You laugh, audibly laugh, and it slowly turns into sobs. You don’t even know who the father is. Hyunjin? Minho? One of them, obviously. You’ve been fucking them both longer than six weeks, which is what you put yourself at if you’re getting nauseous and vomiting. Of course you can’t know for certain, that will have to be confirmed at an obstetrics appointment, which you will now have to go to, routinely. 

The words abortion, adoption flash in your mind. You did not plan this, you did not want this. Yet even as you sit here, drops of pee all over the place, sobbing into your hands, you can’t quite seem to change the “did not want” to “do not want” in your head. 

“I do not want this,” you say it out loud, because maybe you just need to audibly hear yourself say it, but it comes out as a complete and utter lie. You feel in your very heart that it’s a lie. 

“I want this,” you whisper, the ghost of a smile spreading across your lips, and suddenly the scared and ugly tears are replaced with a sense of overwhelming excitement. “I want this.” 

You clean up the bathroom and roll up the pregnancy tests in a paper towel, you have no idea why you feel like saving them, but you roll them up anyway. 

When you walk back into the kitchen Seungmin is sitting at the table, his bandaged leg propped up on a chair, “Well?” 

“I’m pregnant,” you state, shocked at your own calmness, picking up your supplies from patching him up earlier to put them back where they belong. 

“Shit,” he whistles low, “Well what are you going to do?” he asks. 

“Have a baby, Seungmin, that’s what I’m going to do.” 

“Do you really think-...”

“What I really think is you should shut your mouth, because you have absolutely zero fucking opinions that matter regarding this, do you want to try me Kim Seungmin? I dare you.” 

“No ma’am.” 

“Good then.” 

🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️

When Minho, Hyunjin and Jisung walk through your door later that evening your very blood turns to ice; an indescribable feeling of excitement, fear, elation and dread consuming your every fiber. 

“How’s the leg?” Hyunjin asks Seungmin, smacking the back of his shoulder. 

“It’s uh,” he looks at you nervously which causes the other three men to look at you as well, “It’s fine. Doc here stitched me up.” Smooth Seungmin, smooth as silk you fucking twat. 

“Did you all get into a wrestling match or something? What’s with the vibes?” Jisung teases. 

“Nothing,” Seungmin answers too fast, “take me home Han, can I get some pain meds or something?” he looks in your general direction but refuses to make eye contact with you. 

“Already sorted them out,” you say pointedly, sliding a little bag across the table, “don’t take them all at once, that would be a pity.”

He sneers at you then stands up, hobbling towards the door, “Han. Now.” 

Jisung closes the refrigerator he was about to descend upon and scurries over, “Shit, okay.” 

You watch as the two of them disappear and close the door. You can feel Minho and Hyunjin staring you down. 

“Did he say something to you again? Because if so we can drag his ass back in here and set it straight,” Minho asks. 

“No,” you shake your head and sit down, “No, he just knows something that you don’t,” you look up at him, terrified of how the next few minutes will play out. Wondering if you shouldn’t bring it up right now, but knowing you’ve said too much not to at this point. 

“What would that be?” Minho frowns. 

“I found out today…” your voice waivers which only seems to concern both men more. 

“Found what out, sweetheart?” Hyunjin sits next to you, his fingers caressing your forearm. 

You pick a spot on the table to look at, because you can’t bring yourself to look at either of them, “I’m pregnant.” 

Silence. Well, the only sound is Minho pulling out the other dining chair for himself, probably so he doesn’t collapse where he stands. 

The three of you sit there for several moments in just total and complete silence. The hum of the ceiling fan sounding more and more like nails on a chalkboard with every passing second. 

“What do you want to do, baby?” it’s Hyunjin that speaks first, and you can tell that he is trying to keep any emotion from his expression, but you can’t tell if he’s hiding a reaction that’s good or bad. 

“I want,” you exhale slowly, “I am going to be a mother, I will not abort this pregnancy, I do not want to talk about adoption. I will not discuss either, and I don’t want to hear it.” 

At this Minho stiffens, his face contorting into something between disgust and hurt, “___, baby, I would never ask you to do something you didn’t want…we…Hyunjin and I…” he stops talking and chuckles. 

“How do we want to do this?” he looks at you and Hyunjin. You know what he’s really asking is  what the fuck is the plan on raising a baby with three parents? but you also don’t have an answer to that. 

“Let’s please not worry or talk about that right now,” you laugh painfully, “I can’t deal with that part right now. Obviously one of you…you know…impregnated me,” you clear your throat, “but there’s no way for me to know who at this point, not without a DNA test and honestly…I love both of you so I just don’t think I want to know, does that make sense?” 

“Makes sense to me,” Hyunjin smiles and effectively ends that part of the discussion, “We’re having a baby?” his voice drips with elation and every muscle in your body relaxes. 

You nod, happy tears brimming your lids, “Yes.” 

“We’re having a baby,” Minho laughs, and you’re surprised to see tears in his eyes as well.

🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️

“You know,” you sit at the bathroom vanity applying your moisturizer when Minho steps out of the shower, “I was terrified to tell you.” 

“Me specifically?” he points to his naked chest. 

“Honestly? Yes…” 

Minho nods and gnaws at his lip, “I guess I deserve that, but I promised you I’d never give you another reason to be scared of me, and I meant it - you never have to be scared of me baby.” 

“I wasn’t scared that you’d be mad at me, I don’t think, I guess I just thought you’d be upset at the idea of having a child. We are not a traditional couple in any way shape or form, so we’ve not really talked about traditional things, like marriage or babies or futures. I didn’t know what you wanted for your life, I still don’t I suppose,” you explain. 

He sits next to you on the bench, “Seola…” his voice cracks at the mention of his late wife's name, “she wanted children, she wanted to be a mother,” he covers his mouth with his hand and squeezes his eyes shut, tears roll down his cheeks and you throw your arms around him. 

“I am so sorry,” you sob with him, “I’m so sorry you lost her, lost your life with her, a future with her. Minho, I’m so sorry.”  

He cries into the small of your neck for a moment before taking a deep breath and righting himself. 

“When the words first came out of your mouth, I felt so guilty, because all I could think about was how she was robbed of that moment, that moment she would get to tell me she was pregnant, but I was so happy anyway, happy without her - it doesn’t seem fair, or right.” 

“It’s not,” you cup his face, “It is not fair.” 

“I was always undecided,” he sniffs, “Part of me, of course, adores the thought of having a son or daughter to raise, to love, someone who can become my whole world and someone to leave a legacy to but then I look around, at the guns, at the murder - is that really what I want to leave anyone with, let alone someone I love so much? Which actually,” he sighs,  “Actually that brings me to something I’ve been thinking about the past couple hours.” 

“What?” 

“I own lots of properties, here in the city and surrounding areas primarily, some are safe houses, some are renters for additional income, but there’s one property, one that absolutely no other soul on Earth knows I own, it’s a last resort - my ‘absolutely have exhausted all options and efforts’ backup - located in Applecross, Scotland,-” 

“Scotland?” you snort, “That is the most random thing I’ve ever heard come out of your mouth. I don’t think I’ve ever once heard you utter the word Scotland,” you chuckle. 

“There’s a reason for that, and now you’re the only other person who knows I own a house there,” he says, an uneasy expression on his face. 

“Why are you telling me?” 

“Because I want you to go there, you can take Hyunjin with you if you want, and when all this shit is over I’ll come join you - we can have the baby there, and someday when the dust settles we can come back here, but you’ll be safer-” 

“No,” you shake your head. 

“You won’t even hear me out?” he argues. 

“No, I won’t, I’m not going anywhere, not without you, I won’t,” you look at him, fighting back tears. 

“But you’ll be safe there,” he continues. 

“Physically? Maybe, but my heart will break if I can’t see you, if I don’t know what’s happening here, happening to you. I will spend every moment miserable and I don’t want it,” you tell him seriously. “No. I will not go.” 

“Fine, okay,” he nods, pushing his wet hair back out of his face. “I’m not going to argue with the mother of my child,” he smirks, “but promise me that you’ll think about it, it really is a lovely location - a little foggy - but if things get too heated here, please remember what I’ve said.” 

“I will keep it in the back of my mind, but I’m not going anywhere without you,” you lean over and kiss his lips. 

“I love you,” he whispers against your mouth, “I love you so much.” His hand finds purchase on your stomach, his fingers fanning out across, “I’m so happy for us.” 

Hyunjin is relaxed on a chair, doodling in his sketchbook when you and Minho emerge from the master bath. 

You frown, “Why are you not in your pajamas? Are you working tonight…again?” 

Hyunjin sets the book down, “I am. Changbin, Felix and I have a meeting with one of Parks guys, they have some intel on the storehouse Jeongin and Seungmin scouted. Park has dabbled in Taehyungs heroin deals in the past, he’s had guys in the building, we’re going to try and map it out so we know exactly where we’re going  the night it all goes down,” he explains with a yawn. 

“You’re all so tired,” you shake your head, “I worry about your clarity.” 

“Don’t worry baby,” he scoots to the edge of the chair, nuzzling his nose against your belly, “Tonight will be friendly, we’ll play cards and smoke and talk, I’ll try to draw out a map based on the information, no danger, promise.” 

“When do you have to leave?” you ask, glancing at the wall clock, just after 10:30pm. 

“Hmm, probably around midnight, that’s usually when they all meet up at their little club house,” he chuckles, “Why?” 

You grin, biting at your lip as you pull the ribbon on your bathrobe, slowly exposing your nudity underneath. 

“I have been insatiably horny the past few days, I guess I know why now,” you giggle, “unfortunately the horniness seems to be constantly competing with unimaginable nausea, but as of this moment, guess who isn’t nauseous?” 

Minho licks his lips and stands behind you, tugging at the opening of the robe, helping it fall gently down your shoulders and arms. 

Hyunjin smiles, dropping to his knees and lifting one of your legs up to rest on the chair he was previously sat on, “I can’t imagine what you’re going through baby,” he whispers, his lips ghosting over the flesh of your inner thigh, leaving goosebumps. 

“Let’s take special care of our girl,” Minho says, his lips on the shell of your ear, his delicate fingers gently massaging your breasts. 

“I like the sound of that,” you chuckle. 

Hyunjin uses his fingers to spread you open, placing a gentle kiss against your clit and your head rolls back, resting on Minhos shoulder as you let out a soft breath. 

“Fuck,” Minhos voice is raspy and dark in your ear, “I love watching him eat you out, it’s so fucking hot.”

“Mmm,” is all you can muster as an agreement. 

Hyunjin is being soft tonight, delicate, savoring. You can feel yourself practically dripping around his tongue, his lips. Your eyes close, the sound of his soft kisses and wet licks consuming you, your need to orgasm so heavy that it aches. It’s his little whimper into your pussy that pushes you over the edge, poor Minho takes the brunt of your full weight as you dig your fingers into Hyunjins scalp, riding out your high on his face. 

Hyunjin stands, pressing himself, with his hard erection against your front, capturing your mouth with his sopping wet lips. You can feel Minho stroking your hair, his cock pressed against your backside. You turn around to face him, gently pushing him back onto the bed behind. 

He shimmies out of his pants before scooting back onto the pillows as you crawl over him, dipping your head down to kiss trails up his thighs. His hard length throbbing, tip dark and waiting eagerly for relief. You spit, his eyes widening as he watches your saliva drip down his shaft before you take it into your fist and pump, causing his head to fall back onto the pillows while you work him slowly. 

Meanwhile, you feel Hyunjin behind you, his hips rutting against your backside, seeking permission to fill you from behind, which you’re more than happy to give. 

“Hard or soft baby?” Hyunjin rasps, straining against you. 

“Soft and slow, and deep,” you reply. You sink your mouth onto Minhos cock as Hyunjin pushes into you, inciting a collective moan from each of you simultaneously. 

If someone had asked you where you thought you’d end up when you agreed to work for Lee Minho, you could’ve given so many answers. I’ll end up rich. I’ll end up in jail. I’ll end up living comfortably for the first time in my life. I’ll end up dead. The list of possible answers was long. However, I’ll end up in a state of complete euphoric pleasure, wedged between two men I love, one of which being the biological father to my unborn child, was never, ever something you’d think of, or even dream up for that matter. 

You barely register Hyunjin groggily getting out of the bed to retreat to the bathroom for a quick wash before venturing off to map out drug houses and smoke cigarettes over cards. The warmth of Minhos body has you cocooned in a heavy blanket of peacefulness, his fingers gently scratching against your scalp. Your eyes are so heavy you don’t even attempt to open them. If you could bottle this moment, retreat back to it anytime you feel afraid or anxious, you would do it in a heartbeat. 

“Love you guys,” you hear Hyunjin whisper as he heads out the bedroom door. 

“Love you too,” Minho responds for the both of you, you’re too tired to speak, but you drift off with a smile on your lips. 

🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️

You sleep late and wake up feeling better than you have in several days, though the nausea is there, bubbling under the surface. You decide to make some lemon ginger tea, and get up to do just that. You’ve got things to do today, like try and find an OBGYN who doesn’t know who you are for starters. You plan to set up a space in the kitchen to do some investigating over your tea.

In your kitchen however, sits Hyunjin, Minho, Felix and Changbin, all looking smug and happy with themselves. 

“Did I miss something?” you wonder as you retrieve the items you need for the tea. 

“Parks guy was more than helpful,” Hyunjin smiles, “He had pictures of the warehouse on his phone, we’ve got everything. Room by room.” 

“That’s good?”

Minho grins, “It’s great baby. Not only are we going to get my fucking guns back, but I’m going to burn his shit to the ground, every ounce of Heroin he’s got is going to go up in flames. Let’s try and watch him replace that.” 

“What happens after that?” you ask, a nervous feeling in your stomach. 

“What happens after that is this shit between Kim Taehyung and I ends, for good.”

Endnotes:

This is an extremely trying and scary time for women right now, and I want to make it very clear that I am 100% Pro-Choice 100% of the time. For the sake of this story, my OC is choosing to continue her pregnancy, but there is no deeper meaning or message that I'm trying to send by writing it that way, and given the current state of things, I personally needed people reading this to know that.

This is a shorter chapter because for me this is a very transitional chapter as we prepare to dive a little deeper into the heavier criminal aspects of the story. I wanted to obvs confirm OC's pregnancy since I left Ch. 6 off with a very "is she/isn't she?" type deal. I also wanted to establish Minho and Hyunjins attitude about it all. Some of you may have anticipated our Minho to go completely off the deep end, but in the end, I just didn't want him to be like that. Anyway, now that I've rambled, as usual here's your virtual smooch and I'll tag my beautiful taglist besties in the replies bc that is so much easier for me. Thanks for being kind and patient while I went through my little dark period. 🫂💜

[macaroonff]

☀️ Sunscreen- Hwang Hyunjin

Another repost

Genre: Summer love, College AU. Beach AU. Friends + roommates to lovers, Fluff Pairing: Hyunjin x Gender Neutral Reader Content Warnings: Mention of stress, pls lmk what else to add Word Count: 1179 words

Song Rec: Sunscreen by Nathanie

In the warmth that the afternoon sun emitted and the one that you reflected, you hoped the thick layer of sticky lotion smothered across your face could prevent your flustered cheeks from being noticed.

Noticed by the one person who could truly break all your defences and upheld pretence, even if all it took was one enthralling gaze.

Hwang Hyunjin was a cohabitant to your messy dorm and an awfully close acquaintance of over two years. He was more on the ingenious side, and you desperately hoped your crush on him would be as inconspicuous as you made it out to be.

However, what Hyunjin hoped for was that the prominent deep tinge on your visage wasn't that of a sunburn caused by the blistering star. 

He should’ve been more considerate than asking you to the beach in the scorching afternoon sun and now that he realises, he never once bothered you with the plans. You watch as he collects a sizeable amount of sunscreen into a lather in his palm before gently dabbing it onto your face, especially your cheeks. 

What he does see instead is the opposite of the result he sought, as you couldn’t control the observable blush from spreading; his tenderness catching you off guard. 

“Ah I don't need any more of that Hyunjin,” you whisper hurriedly, removing his hands from your face.

Hyunjin stood in silence, contemplating whether he should bring out the parasol from the car but chooses not to as he sees you wiping the lotion off in a hurry, gathering that it wasn’t necessary. He lets out a sigh, then sits down on the blanket, questioning whether he had been reckless in his action, praying it didn’t make you uncomfortable seeing the quiet that you remained in for the rest of the time.

"Let me know if you're not feeling okay." He finally mutters to which you give him a reassuring smile.

You knew you wouldn't feel okay. Not when you were unsuccessful at keeping yourself at bay. If you could, you’d have yourself floating along the inshore waves, trying to run away from embarrassing yourself.

But you also acknowledge that Hyunjin wouldn’t judge you. You didn’t have to panic.

You sigh, echoing Hyunjin’s ones. You lay back on the blanket, closing your eyes, hiding your face behind the shadows of his nonchalant posture, happy at the temporary shield from the sun.

“I feel like we haven’t had quality time together like this in months.” he whispers, and you feel him looking at you by the way the shadows shift away from your abdomen.

“With our lectures and assignments taking away our souls, I’m surprised we even get to eat dinner together,” you say squinting at him from in between your half open palm, taking in the sight of his focused eyes as he questions your statement.

“You mean ramen? I wouldn’t call that dinner”

You shrug. It was whatever you could manage in between your hectic schedule.

“Maybe we should treat ourselves to better food someday” he says laying a blanket as it got chillier after a while

“Mhm.” you agree

He lays down beside you finally as you listen to the waves greeting the shore behind the second silence. “Hyunjin?” you whisper, assuming he’d fallen asleep. 

“Yes?” he replies, completely turning towards you, resting his head on his hand. 

You gulp before gathering the courage to ask him your next question. “What would be the best way to confess to someone without being awkward?” you pop out of the blue.

He raises his eyebrow before giggling to himself.

“You have a crush? Now why wasn’t I informed about this?” he teases you and adjusts the blanket over you, seeing you tremble a little.

You break eye contact, a little shy as you find yourself melting again. Hyunjin didn’t miss your little smile and noticed the warmth spread across your cheeks. This time he could discern its meaning as his eyes travel all over your face, looking for other hints of love.

“Seeing you blush like that, it must be a massive one.”

“I suppose it is,” you whisper, careless of your indirect confession. Yes, you had a fat crush on him, and nothing he did would help you forget that.

“Who’s the lucky person?” he finally asks, curious, and if he was honest, worried. If he had correctly picked up on your hints, and if it wasn’t just him overthinking and pining for it to be true, he wished it was him. Because slowly he too got wrapped up in your company, he enjoyed it to a point where all he looked forward to in a day was going back to your room and having ramen together. It was the highlight he craved everyday, it was the comfort he required when he was stressed. He wasn’t sure he could call it love, but when he didn’t exactly know what love was, he found this to be the closest definition. 

You knew this question would come sooner or later, but now that you hear it, you find it difficult to be honest. How would you ever tell him you liked him?

“Well answer my question first, how should one confess?”

Hyunjin smiles and takes your hand in his, your sweaty palms engulfed in closure.

“I’d do it like this, I’d start by making sure we’re  alone when I confess, and that my crush is comfortable with it. Then I’d be direct with my confession.” 

“Easy for you to say, you’d get anyone you ever wanted,” you mutter in desperation.

“Well, in that case;" he pauses, "I love you y/n. For so long I wished to confess, but we were swept away by work and time, just like those waves,” he finally lets out, looking at the water along the horizon, trying to avoid your eyes.

You were stunned. Nowhere in your wildest dreams would you hope to hear these words, especially not from him. But you knew this wasn’t a dream despite the deceivingly dreamlike scene, the unreal situation. You find his eyes awkwardly staring at the sand as you try to discern the reality of his confession.

“You’re not joking are you?”

“I’m dead serious y/n.”

The shaky breath you let out only confused Hyunjin further. Was he being delusional? Was he being too direct with it? Maybe now wasn’t the best time? He almost regretted it until he felt your fingers on his chin, lifting his face until he saw the smile on your face.

“Good. Because I love you too Hyunjin, and I feel so very lucky right now; I can’t even explain it.”

He mirrors your smile, except his is wider. He pulls you into the tightest hug you had ever been buried in. “I’m so glad y/n,” he whispers while kissing the top of your head.

Both of you knew it was the truth, and in a long time you felt giddy at the thought of what was to come. It was like a reward after the long stressful weeks and it couldn’t have been better.

[therhythmafterthesummer]

Blessed (M) ~Hyunjin

Pairing: Incubus!Hyunjin x Human!G.N.Reader Themes: Supernatural/Fantasy AU | Suggestive smut-ish Warnings: MC is somewhere on the ace spectrum, mentions of death, uncomfortable feelings revolving intercourse (not related to Hyunjin), Dampé from Ocarina of Time is mentioned, possible desecration of holy ground, non-graphic depictions of intercourse. Word Count: ~4k | AO3 Summary: Being intimate with someone was something you had trouble understanding. When you steal an alluring, unexpected item, you finally get a taste of what being with someone was actually like.

Author’s note: continuing with October’s theme! this piece came to be after a talk with a friend about physical desires while on the ace spectrum and how our minds worked around that. It might not be for everyone but it was produced with care and love 💕

Due to all the abovementioned warnings, this story is intended for an adult audience only. Minors please do not interact.

Disclaimer: the story represented in this work does not represent Stray Kids in any way; anything described in this story and all actions performed by the characters are purely fictional, this was created just for good fun.

There had always been something odd about you. 

Or at least, it became odd to you once you realised you didn’t share certain aspects of yourself with other people.

When you entered your pre-teen years and conversations about boys and girls roamed wildly in your group of friends, you wondered when that’d become your topic of interest, too–so you could participate. In all honesty, all you wanted to do was talk about the new Avatar: the Last Airbender episode that aired the night before, to discuss theories and how much you liked or disliked a certain character, but alas, your friends were only interested in talking about a random class member that they thought was cute, about how they would write them letters and leave them secretly on their desk, and so on.

When you reached teenagehood, you no longer brought up your topics of interest to your friends, for you had been shut down one too many times in favour of talking about their new boyfriend or girlfriend, so you settled to just listen to them talk and pretend like you understood all those urges they told you about. It was almost like you were gaining all your experience on interpersonal relationships from them–they often commented to you in detail how kissing felt like, how touching someone felt like, and it was almost, almost like you could understand.

At some point, you took up the habit of reading. And through the words you read on the paper, through the swift and detailed descriptions, you got your first taste of romanticism. Suddenly, kisses were intriguing, holding someone was intriguing, and soon paperbacks turned to pixels on a screen where a whole world of possibilities opened up to you.

Words were nice. 

You liked the way words came together in your head, the letters seemingly changing shape into images as your eyes scanned each stroke, each pixel. Reading about fictional people falling in love, sharing their love, was enticing, exhilarating, and it had made you curious–much more than any of the stories your friends could tell you about their latest partner. So much so that, by the time you turned eighteen and shared your first kiss with another person, you realised you actually liked the act of kissing. 

The memory is fond to you–even if it had all been a product of the alcohol running in your bloodstream. However, the moment the other party involved in the kiss started to get bold with their hands, you realised you did not like that part of kissing. You did not want their hands on you, so you had gracefully pulled yourself away from them and returned to your friends to enjoy the rest of the night.

By the time you were a young adult, half-way into your university studies, working a part time job, surrounded by a solid group of friends, you had decided to try finally experiencing all those things you had read about for years, all those things your friends had told you about. You met a good friend who had similar likes and dislikes to yours, who had similar views on the world, who you found objectively attractive, and when they made a proposition to you, you said yes.

The first time you got intimate with someone, you could admit it had been okay–nice, even. But it took a lot for you to not feel slightly ashamed after, not because you had done anything weird or non-consensual, but because the moment the other person had asked you to do it again you had to turn them down, effectively breaking that friendship.

It wasn’t them, it was you. 

Your whole body cringed whenever you remembered their hands on you, even if they had been nothing but caring and dotting and great, the second you had reached your climax and the light buzz in your brain dissipated you realised you were not cut out for this. Not with this person, possibly not with anyone. So, you continued to indulge only in your head, only in the fantasies you read.

‘It’s not that odd’, one of your closest friends told you once when you had been brave enough to disclose this insecurity of yours. ‘Sex isn’t that great usually anyway… Some people just aren’t interested in it and that’s fine’, which was something that reassured you–that reassurance letting you carry on with your life.

When your friends decided to host a ‘Halloween’ event in the town’s biggest graveyard you had almost said no, not because you were scared or anything, just because you had a shit-ton of reading to do for your early Monday class. Your friends had insisted, alleging ‘c’mon, it’s Friday night… You can read over the weekend…’ which you supposed was a good enough excuse to convince you.

The event was planned to be a treasure hunt of sorts. ‘It’s like Dampé’s Heart-Pounding Gravedigging Tour from OoT, but without the digging!’ your friend had excitedly told you. So, at 23:00hrs on the 31st of October, with empty tote bags slung over your shoulders, you and other nineteen people set off into this game, moving individually to find the hidden items scattered across the cemetery. The person that found the most items would win a cash prize and an ungodly amount of Halloween treats.

The items you had to collect had a small tag attached with Dampé’s face on it, so it was easy to spot something that was meant for you to pick up and something that wasn’t–none of you actually wanted to take anything from the graves, so they had designed this system. You had a full hour to roam the cemetery, at midnight the event would be over and the findings of each participant would be counted. You had managed to find a total of fifteen items, deciding to spend the last ten minutes of the game scavenging around the mausoleums close to where the ‘referees’ of the game were waiting for the players.

Five minutes before the clock struck midnight, you saw something gleaming in your peripheral vision. It was almost like the thing was calling you, pulling you towards it, so you moved. It was so small, you would’ve totally missed it if you had not been crouching around the area in the first place. After dusting it off, you picked it up to realise it was an antique brooch, a cameo you could not quite make out the features of due to all the dirt and grime.

Two minutes to midnight. 

This thing didn’t have a tag with Dampé’s face on it.

You were supposed to take from the graveyard only the items placed there by the organisers of the event.

But the thing was… Oddly alluring.

Glancing towards the referees, you made sure they weren’t looking at you before you stuffed the thing in your jean’s pocket, your body suddenly feeling like it was vibrating, a ringing settling in your ears. It was wrong. You shouldn’t take it, but you had done it already, and you couldn’t bring yourself to back down.

The deafening sound of the horn going off startled you. The treasure hunt was over, and by the time you made it to where the referees were, there were people already dumping the contents of their totes on the portable table they had brought along.

You didn’t win that night, but the extra weight in your pocket almost made it feel like you did.

When you got home, you took the thing out of your pocket to rinse it under some warm water. It was not enough to remove the caked mud on it, so taking the old toothbrush you kept under your sink for moments just like these, you started to softly scrub the thing, adding a bit of dish soap to help with the dirt.

Somewhere in the world, there was probably an antique collector having a heart attack as you used a fucking toothbrush and some random white label dish soap to clean an antiquity. But you had to make do, so you tried to be as careful as you could, your fingers trembling slightly with anticipation.

Rinsing it under water one last time, patting it dry with a paper towel, you looked closely at the cameo. It was even prettier now that you could actually notice the details, the chiselled profile of a young man carved into nacre, framed by an intricate border.

It really was pretty.

Really pretty.

Once you had finally scrubbed yourself clean in the shower, removing all that death dust and grime off of you, you got yourself into your comfiest pyjamas, leaving the cameo resting on your windowsill, right under the moonlight. As you looked at it from where your head rested on your pillow, you felt your exhaustion of the day clinging to your bones, dragging you into a semi-asleep state.

‘It’s okay, keep it’ the words danced in your subconscious, spreading warmth within your chest, right as you fell asleep completely.

Misty wisps clouded your vision, all images going through your eyes muted by reds and yellows, the scent of incense luring you to move forward, to find what was calling you, pulling you. Your body felt light, almost as if you were gliding instead of walking, staring at tall columns with intricate patterns carved onto their surface. You could hear water trickling, faintly, but close to you.

“What do we have here…?”

The sudden sound of someone talking startled you, the voice smooth, velvety, going into your system like the sweetest honey you have ever tasted on your tongue. Your gaze sought the source, frantically looking around you until the fog around you dissipated, letting you see the end of the room you were standing in.

Plush carpet and even plusher pillows were stacked on one of the corners of the room, all warm, inviting colours scattered around a young man. He was lithe, graceful, his body covered in gold, with fire red hair and piercing cerulean eyes staring back at you, almost as if he was looking right into you. You couldn’t look away from him, and–slightly alarmed–you realised there was a foreign feeling brewing quickly within you. Something you had never felt when you looked at a person, something you’d only ever felt when you were immersed in your books.

“Thank you, little human”, his voice was doing things to you, things you couldn’t explain. “Thanks to you, I’m free once again”.

When he stood up, you couldn’t help but admire his stance. He walked towards you, his movements slow but so smooth and fluid, your eyes didn’t know where to settle as he came close, you wanted–needed–to take him all in as much as you could, admire him as much as you could.

“My name’s Hyunjin”, with your hand in his, he brought it to his lips, placing a soft, delicate kiss on your knuckles. “A pleasure to make your acquaintance”.

Words would not come out of your mouth, your eyes frantically jumping from one of his eyes to the other as he looked back at you, an amused expression painting the features of his face as he noticed your struggle. “It’s okay, darling. You don’t need to say anything, I already know what’s going on in that pretty head of yours”, he finally let go of your hand, moving instead to cup your face between his palms, his thumb softly drawing patterns on your cheeks as he looked deep into you, heat spreading over your face as you melted into his touch.

“Since I truly am grateful, I am going to give you a gift. You should feel lucky, darling, this is not something I get to give often…” He took a step closer, one of his arms wrapping around your waist to pull you flush against his body, while the other cradled the back of your head–the sudden contact making your heart flip in your chest and making that feeling of warmth grow between your legs.

“I’m going to give you the freedom of choice. Tonight, I’ll let you sleep. I’ll even help you have the best sleep you’ve ever had. Tomorrow, you’ll have to decide… If you don’t want to partake in what’s to come, you must take the cameo and drop it where someone else can find it”, his face moved close to you, your breath hitching in your throat as his lips brushed yours lightly. “But… If you do wish to partake in what’s to come, you are to keep the cameo, keep it with you when you go to sleep tomorrow, and I’ll give you all those things you’ve always wished for but never had the courage or drive to ask for…”

With that, he leaned in, connecting his mouth fully with yours. You had kissed people before, but never had you felt like this, like your knees couldn’t keep your body up, like your whole body was on fire, like you couldn’t think.

‘Horny…’ Your subconscious mocked you, the voice in your head sounding eerily close to Hyunjin’s.

You held onto him, feeling his heated skin under your palms as his tongue made his way into your mouth. The slow movement of his tongue against yours had your head spinning, your body pressing itself further into him, which made him chuckle against your lips.

When Hyunjin parted from you, your lips chased after him, the action bringing a smirk to his face. “That’s just a taste of what you could get, little human. Should you decide to keep the cameo with you when you sleep, I can give you that and so, so much more”.

Waking up was hard today. Sleep clung to you, feeling as if you were floating on a cloud. When was the last time you slept this well? You couldn’t tell, but your body felt light, and slightly tingly. The early morning sunshine peeked through the drapes, its warm touch falling onto your face.

With a hazy mind and the coolness of the bedsheets clinging to your frame, your eyes opened slowly, only for you to realise your hips were grinding on the pillow you hugged every night to sleep. Your movements halted as soon as you registered it, puzzled at the wetness you could feel between your legs.

It wasn’t like you’d never woken up feeling this way before, just that never had your body reacted this strongly to it. Warmth spread all over you, a desperate need threading in every fibre of your being as you laid there on your bed.

You swallowed thickly, ignoring the ache between your legs completely as you sat down on your bed. You couldn’t help but feel like you should be doing something, like there was something you needed to remember, as if you had a sentence on the tip of your tongue that you couldn’t quite fully let out of your mouth. Shaking your head, you decided to push that feeling to the back of your mind, standing up from your bed to start your morning routine.

With a fresh face full of your favourite skincare products you remembered you didn’t have any coffee left in your pantry, so, on a whim, you decided to head over to the nearest café to get some coffee and breakfast–you were used to doing all this at home, but indulging every once in a while wouldn’t hurt, would it?

As you got dressed, your eyes landed on the cameo on your windowsill, flashes of last night’s treasure hunt crossing your mind. What if it had belonged to someone that was buried there? Or if it was dropped by one of their loved ones? Then again, it looked like it had been there for a long time so you shouldn’t feel guilty for having taken it… Or should you?

The thing felt warm in your hand–from being under the sunlight, you figured. The tip of your thumb traced the profile carved in nacre and a feeling of familiarity spread within you as your eyes took in the face of the young man. Had this person existed? Or had it been just created in the mind of a skilled artist for them to carve it and frame it in such a pretty piece?

In a last minute decision, you shoved the cameo in your pocket, feeling almost as if you had to take it with you. Maybe you should return it to the place you found it, leaving it to rest with the dead, with the person it had probably belonged to.

When you stepped out of your building you were greeted with a welcoming sunny day. The streets around your building complex were bursting with life, with cyclists driving by and people hurriedly walking along; yet, you couldn’t help but feel like something was amiss. 

As you moved along the busy streets, your hand reached inside your pocket, taking the cameo out to admire it under the sun. ‘Are you going to keep it or leave it?’ Your subconscious told you, the voice in your head sounding almost foreign, but familiar at the same time. Moving your gaze from the cameo to the fountain you were walking by, your movements halted.

You wondered briefly if you should leave it on the fountain rim, maybe leaving it there for someone else to find would ease that anxious feeling of guilt you harboured since you had picked it up. Maybe someone else would be more worthy of keeping such an intricate piece, someone who would be able to appreciate its beauty to the fullest… You didn’t like that thought. Somehow, you didn’t like to think about someone else having it. You had found it yourself, why couldn’t you keep it?

There was something about this cameo… That made you feel like you wanted to keep it. Maybe you could be that worthy person that could appreciate it as it was.

In therapy, you had learnt that anxiety came from indecision, from lack of acceptance towards the decisions you took in life. So, you made a decision, completely ready to accept that decision fully.

You decided to keep the cameo.

“So, you kept it”.

Recognition washed over you as you found yourself in that room again. Suddenly, you remembered why you wanted to keep the cameo in the first place, and as you stood there, looking at Hyunjin, you were more than certain that you had made the exact decision you needed to. How could you not? With his presence alone you had felt more than what any other person had made you feel, you felt an odd sense of curiosity that ached to be satisfied, and it was clear to you he knew it, if the smirk on his face was anything to go by.

“It’s okay to feel the way you do now, you know?” He commented as he walked closer to you, getting into your space. Your eyes never left his, your hands itching with a sudden need to reach out to him, to touch him. “It’s only natural, it’s the effect I have on people, little one. Even when I don’t do it on purpose like now”.

Hyunjin stood right in front of you, so close, but somehow too far away for your liking. “I must say, though… You are quite the interesting case. So many unexplored areas in that brain of yours, in that body of yours, too…”

He walked closer, but he made no move to touch you. “In a way, you’re far from those that I’ve engaged before, but humans, my darling, tend to have the same needs at their very core. Although, I’ve come to learn that the means to fulfil those needs can be vastly different from person to person”.

Hyunjin was so close, you could feel his body heat seeping into you, the proximity making you feel slightly dizzy. So many different feelings and thoughts roamed freely inside of you, curiosity, eagerness, worry, and–as shock revelation to even yourself–lust. A feeling of lust so strong it had your nerve endings on fire, the fine hairs on your arm standing on end as you stared deep into his eyes.

You’d felt lust before, it was not a foreign feeling, you knew how it felt like, but you’d never felt it towards another being before, and it puzzled you. A smirk crept onto Hyunjin’s lips, the action making you look at his mouth and letting your mind wander. “I can understand why you would feel confused. But, as you might have noticed, I am not from your world, my dear. I exist, and I don’t at the same time. Only a mere presence in your mind for as long as you keep the cameo with you as you fall asleep. As it is right now, I’ll only exist for you for as long as you want me to, for as long as your body can take it, and if you’re good to me, you’ll be able to take it for a long time. Let’s call it a mutually beneficial agreement…”

“However, if you’re not good to me, you’ll slowly wither, you’ll become sick and brittle”, Hyunjin’s face was impassive, completely void of any emotion as he stared at you. “Do you understand what I’m saying?”

You did, so you nodded. There was something in you pulling you to him, that curiosity you felt the first moment you saw him blooming quickly within you, aching for fulfilment, and you were ready to accept any consequences doing just that might bring.

“Touch me”.

The certainess in your voice should’ve surprised you, but it didn’t. As soon as the syllables left your mouth you knew that was exactly what you wanted, just as Hyunjin seemed to know, too–if the smirk on his face, again, was anything to go by.

His hands found your waist, pulling you close to him. His warmth engulfed you fully, and the moment his lips descended on yours, you felt your mind go blank, completely void of anything other than his lips on you, his hands on you, and his tongue in your mouth.

When Hyunjin moved you towards the corner of the room, laying on the carpet and pulling you to straddle him, you couldn’t help the noises that escaped you. It was almost too much, but not in the way you were used to feeling when someone touched you; instead of feeling like you wanted to pull away from his roaming hands you pushed yourself to his touch, sometimes going as much as holding his hands on yours and placing them where you wanted them on your body, making him chuckle, entirely amused by your desperation.

Clothes were discarded, heated flesh pressing against heated flesh as Hyunjin left open mouthed kisses down your neck, his hands feeling you up, warming you up. You had your fair share, too, groping and holding and caressing anywhere and everywhere your hands could reach, enjoying every single sound that came from his mouth.

Once your bodies connected at their very cores, with your hips grinding down on him, your mouths devouring one another, you couldn’t help but ask against his mouth between pants, “will I remember this when I wake up?”

Hyunjin simply chuckled, his hands caressing the planes of your back only to dip, holding your hips, assisting your movement. “Only if you’re good to me”.

And you wanted to.

You desperately wanted to be good to him, to give him anything he asked you for, so you did. Feeling nothing but extasis and satisfaction any time he filled you up, any time you felt yourself let go under his touch.

For once, you didn’t feel disgusted or ashamed. For once, you were able to enjoy yourself, to enjoy him, and when you woke up the next day a panting, sweaty mess, with the remnants of your very much real and tangible climax on your skin, you couldn’t help but feel thankful.

Thankful that, in a way, you had been blessed by this demon, for he had helped you find a way to feel all those things your friends had ever told you about in the confines of your mind, without any restraints.

© therhythmafterthesummer 2022-2023. all rights reserved. do not repost or translate my stories.

Constructive feedback is always welcome :)

[jiniretsfeet]

I love you and only you.

hyunjin x fem!reader

super angsty, fluff, hyunjin is older than reader but isn’t mentioned, hyunjin and reader are lovey dovey

warnings: insecurity, doubting, overthinking, mentions about physical appearance in a negative way

note: this is my first time writing and I have 0 experience whatsoever so I hope it’s okay and any mentions of physical appearance is only based off of beauty standards and is not actually from me and what I think women should look like. sorry if my English isn’t perfect; it’s not my first language. enjoy!

you and Hyunjin have only been together for 4 months, those 4 months were the best 4 months of your life.

but dating someone perfect in and out isn’t so easy.

doubting was the one thing that messes with your brain the most when it comes to your relationship with him.

are you really good enough for him? is what you tell yourself almost every time you spend your time together - even tell yourself that when you guys aren’t spending time together.

it’s exhausting having these thoughts, and you know you shouldn’t; but how can you not?

you know there are better looking girls out there for him. not that looks is the only factor to it, but you’re just sure someone is out there that’s better for him overall.

who were you anyway? you were just a new student who didn’t make a single friend besides him, and the fact that he’s still you’re only friend until now and you’ve been in that school for almost a year, it’s upsetting; but what can you do about it? there’s nothing special about you.

on the other hand, he was good looking, top of his batch, friends with the whole campus, and any good trait you could think of, he probably has.

with that, you sometimes wonder if he’s just dating you out of pity. maybe because he thought that if you guys dated, then he could have an excuse to spend more time with you because he knows you don’t have friends; only him. he didn’t actually like you. why did you even say yes to him. well yes you did like him but he deserves someone better.

you didn’t like the way you look so why would he like the way you look? right? your face was average. your body had no curves. you weren’t skinny. you were overall average. you did not fit the standard. he deserved the standard.

but that’s only what your thoughts say and you never dared tell him any of that. too afraid to learn the truth. because what if your thoughts were right…you wouldn’t be able to stand it.

too lost in your thoughts that you forgot that you were sitting in a cafe waiting for Hyunjin. you guys planned to meet up for a little date, and decided to go to your favorite cafe. it was the cafe where you said yes to hyunjin to being his girlfriend.

he was already 10 minutes late. you didn’t pay that much attention to it but decided to text him just in case.

“baby, where are you? i’m already at the cafe. been waiting for you for 15 minutes already.” (bonus 5 minutes because you came earlier than your meet up time) you typed it, but decided to delete it and re-type since it sounded too dry and impatient for your liking.

“hey babe! at the cafe already just waiting for you :>” you typed. you were contented with it so you clicked send.

at that moment, you heard the main door to the cafe open; given that they have a wind chime, the sound of the door opening was well heard all throughout the cafe. you looked back to see if it was Hyunjin but no, it wasn’t. just a waitress who looked like she was late and in a rush.

she came in and her boss seemed a little upset but heard that she was late because of some extension from a school activity, or something like that.

truly it was none of your business so why eavesdrop.

-

8 minutes passed and your phone finally let out a notification.

“hey baby, yea i’m on my way. sorry just had to extend to finish this group project. but i’ll be there in a few minutes” you read the message that Hyunjin sent and smiled knowing he’ll be here soon enough since it’s just a 3 minute walk from campus to here. but what he said sounded familiar but you just couldn’t remember where you heard it from. oh well.

you waited patiently. didn’t order anything yet because you were gonna order with Hyunjin.

-

the sound of the wind chime again. you looked back and saw him. he looked sort of exhausted but that was understandable, he still looked great though; he always looked good.

you raised your hand to direct him to your table and he saw you, gave you a quick smile, gave him a smile back. he walked over and bended to give you a peck on your lips. even after months of being with him, he still gave you butterflies from small gestures like pecks. with that, you quickly greeted eachother.

“hey baby, how are you? sorry if you waited long, i hope you don’t mind” he said.

“no, no it’s fine baby i understand, don’t worry about it!” you said while having small laughs under your breath to reassure him it was completely fine.

he gave you a smile and sat down the chair in front of you. after settling himself, neither of you spoke, just admired each other for a moment until he reached out to caress your cheek.

“i miss you” he said. truth was, it had only been 2 days since you last saw each other but you did miss him too.

“i miss you too baby” you had a big smile on your face while also finding comfort in how he touched your face.

he took his hand off of you and said, “let’s order?”

“oh yea yeah” you laughed a little because you seemed lost in his touch completely forgetting you were in public.

he seemed to notice and laughed with you.

see these were the moments that makes you regret having those bad thoughts of him dating you out of pity. guilt taking over you every time this happens.

you raised your hand to call out someone to take your order. the girl in a rush from earlier was the one to come and she looked so much different from earlier, she looked cleaner and looked like she wasn’t just haggard minutes ago. she was gorgeous. you suddenly felt insecure about yourself again. looking over at Hyunjin who seems to looked a little surprised when he saw the waitress coming your way. you were confused why. was she that pretty? is he really looking at her like that right in front of you? you couldn’t believe it. you were about to speak up and excuse yourself but someone spoke sooner,

“Lilah? you work here? no way!” he said sounding amused. you were confused so you decided to look at the waitress. “Oh Hyunjin! yea I just started yesterday! what are you doing here?” she said, only looking at Hyunjin like you didn’t exist; like they had their own world.

“oh! we’re here because this is our usual date spot! by the way, my girlfriend, y/n!” he reached for your hand which was also on the table.

“yea hi! Lilah right?” you said.

she smiled and said “mhm! i’m one of hyunjin’s classmate”

after hearing that, a bunch of people from the other table let out loud laughs and all three of you looked.

Hyunjin scoffed and said “so that’s where they were the whole time huh? having the time of their life while we were working our asses off” Lilah and him started laughing together while you were sitting there not knowing what was happening. you felt so left out.

Hyunjin looked at you, seeing your confused reaction made him speak out “oh y/n, remember the group project i told you about earlier?” you nod “basically me, Lilah, and those guys from the other table are all group mates but it’s literally just me and Lilah doing all the work. like, they don’t even show up!” you let out a small ‘ohh’ and laughed a little but truly everything made sense, that’s why she was in a rush to catch her shift. they were group mates and once again insecurity is eating you up. what could they have done spending all that time alone together… could they have possibly developed feelings for eachother… I mean it wasn’t impossible really since both of them are good looking and both seemed out-going. you started over thinking again. you hated this. yourself, your mindset, just everything. Hyuniin definitely doesn’t deserve you.

They were just group mates doing their project together right? that’s all? don’t need to overthink over such little things. you scoff in your head for how you’re acting right now.

“y/n?” hyunjin says

still lost in your thoughts…

“baby?” hyunjin says louder

you finally break out of your thoughts “oh y-yeah? what’s up?”

hyunjin laughs a little “Lilah was asking what you wanted to order”

“oh…yea right… Lilah” you manage to say trying not to make it obvious your thoughts just now were about her.

but of course Hyunjin knew better. he knew you were thinking about something or someone… particularly the girl in front of you both.

-

Lilah walks away after taking your order and Hyunjin definitely noticed the sudden change in your mood. He knew what this was about. He was sure now. He saw the way you looked at her and how crooked your smile was when she was there and even after she left.

He reached out for your hand and said “You okay baby?”

“Oh yea I’m okay. yea, why?”

“I love you. so much, y/n. you don’t even know”

Your heart shatters because of the guilt. because of all the negative thoughts you’ve had about him and your relationship. guilt was eating you alive.

“I love you too baby” You let out a shaky laugh after. “What’s with the sudden sweetness?” you say lightly

“do i really need a reason to be sweet to my girlfriend?” Hyunjin smiles caressing your hand with his thumb. “you’re the only one i love, and will only love. okay baby?”

“okay” you say while letting out nervous laughs. “i don’t deserve you, Hyunjin.” said smiling.

“I should say otherwise. I don’t deserve YOU” He said while slightly squeezing your hand.

“Don’t let those negative thoughts get to you. Okay baby?” he said in a persuasive tone.

you just slowly nod without looking him in the eye. knowing that you’ll never not be able to have these negative thoughts.

removing his hand from your hand.

you look over at your hand losing contact with his without look him in the eyes while doing so.

you suddenly feel someone’s hand lifting your chin. finally being able to make eye contact with the help of him holding your face up to look straight at him.

“say it and look at me while doing so.” he said all serious. to be honest you liked it when he was serious, he rarely is and he always looked much more attractive when serious.

“y-yes” you stutter, scared you made him upset by ruining the mood.

“then, good!” he gives the biggest smile and removes his hand from your chin and rests it on your face.

you were utterly confused by the change of his mood. he just went from serious to jolly in a second. the duality of this man i swear.

other than that, you realized just how much he loves you and isn’t dating you out of pity. you still don’t know what he sees in you but again he said not to get these thoughts in my head. he was perfect and you loved him just as much as he loved you.

-

moments later, the food arrived, ended up finishing it. Hyunjin just said bye to Lilah right after and didn’t bother starting a conversation with her again. He really cared about you - really understood you well.

you ended up just going back to his place. watched a movie, ate again and spent more time together,

until the end of the night.

-the end-

[under-and-over-the-moon]

Hunger X | Hyunjin

*Please first read the previous parts for context, which you can find here *

Minors DNI/DNF/Do not read

pairing: Hyunjin x Reader

word count: 13.1k

genre: fantasy!au, soulmate!au, historical!au, smut, fluff, angst

warnings: smut!, sub!Hyunjin, very softdom!Reader, stomach riding, unprotected sex, creampie, riding, wrist kink, oral (f receiving), praise kink, breeding kink, pregnancy kink, a touch of subspace, aftercare, accidental exhibitionism, basically Jeongin needs to learn to knock, pregnancy, an au-specific physical/mental ailment, nightmares, lots of angst, lots of fluff, hurt/comfort, let me know if I missed anything

All characters mentioned are adults.

A/N: This chapter is pretty cheesy, but sometimes you just have to write a cheesy chapter 😅 Also, I guess this is now also somewhat of a Mamadol fic (I am still dismayed by that disbandment). I also accidentally deleted my most recent tag list, so if I missed you, please let me know!

Comments, questions, and theories are always appreciated! 😊

~~~

“Everything seems fine,” you heard a woman’s voice say as the edges of a room came into view, the mists clearing to leave behind the crisp air that nipped against the wet trails of your tears. Hyunjin was sitting in front of you, his hands holding yours, eyebrows knitted together as he looked to the healer.

“Her heartrate, temperature are all okay,” the healer continued, “The baby seems healthy. I think though, this may need…let me get someone, I’ll be right back.”

You heard a rustle behind you as she left the room and Hyunjin immediately moved to you, seating himself behind you as he pulled you into his arms. You turned to rest your head on his shoulder, smiling up at him weakly. But you had fully returned, so even if the smile was feeble, it was genuine, warm. Hyunjin’s eyes lit up.

“You’re back,” he said breathlessly, cupping your face.

You nodded and whispered, “Thank you for bringing me here. Thank you for taking care of me when I…can’t. Something…isn’t right.”

“We’ll figure it out, baby,” he said gently, “We’ll find a way to make you feel better.”

His thumb brushed your cheek, his face darkening for just a moment as he felt the trails of salt your tears had left, his eyes meeting where the skin around your eyes was still red and puffy. You knew he wouldn’t say anything because he didn’t want to scare you, to add his worries on top of yours until there were answers, but you could see that the darkness in his features was just a shadow that the terror had left behind. He was terrified you would leave yourself and never come back.

“Hey,” you said, placing your hands on his, “I’ll always come back. We’ll find a way.”

And you then saw tears pool in his eyes before he forced them back, blinking them away. But one still managed to escape, rolling down the side of his nose and to the edge of his lips. You leaned forward, placing yours to where the tear rested on his lower lip, tasting the salt. And then you melted further into him, your lips pressed fully to his as he pulled you closer to him.

The canvas door rustled, and you broke away from Hyunjin, turning quickly to see the priest striding in, black robes swishing behind him. His eyes widened just a little at the intimacy of your position, before his expression returned back to neutral.

“Lady Hwang, Hyunjin,” he said, nodding as he addressed you both.

“Your holiness,” responded Hyunjin, shifting beneath you, the surprise evident in his tone, “Why-“

“I had told the healer to inform me in the event that…Lady Hwang’s condition worsened,” he responded. His voice had a forced calmness, an unsuccessful attempt to not alarm either of you. Your stomach still tightened at his serious expression, and you felt Hyunjin pull you just slightly closer to him, clearly also picking up on the tension in the priest’s features.

The priest then looked from Hyunjin to you, asking, “Is it okay if I check a few things?”

You nodded quickly. You knew that your time as yourself was potentially limited, and you wanted answers before you were again lost.

“Hyunjin, could you…?” he asked, and Hyunjin nodded, understanding the priest’s intention, before quickly standing up, leaving you by yourself to be examined. He seated himself across the room, eyes glued to you as he leaned forward.

“I’ll need to touch you,” said the priest, his eyes again locked on yours, “If that’s okay with you. To see what might be going on.”

You nodded.

“Okay,” he said, “I’ll need to touch your stomach and your head. But…” he said, his eyes moving down to your stomach, “I’ll need your stomach to be uncovered.”

You hastened to comply, pulling the ties along the bottom of your top, opening to reveal your bump. The priest threw a nervous glance at Hyunjin – he expected that as your husband he would protest, or at least show some resistance, to the idea of a man besides him touching such an intimate part of you, the place where his baby was housed. But Hyunjin just continued to look intently at you, eyes only filled with worry, no trace of possessiveness. He didn’t care who was touching you at this point, as long as you were okay with it, if there might be answers in their hands.

“Hyunjin, hand me that candle please,” said the priest, turning towards your husband and gesturing towards a candle that burned on the small table next to him. Hyunjin nodded, carefully transferring the tiny flickering flame over to the priest, who set it at a table next to him.

He then took a deep breath, leaning forward to touch briefly at your temples, before more his hands down to gently touch your stomach at its center. And, as he pulled his hands apart, moving them to your sides, you saw images move between them. They looked…like the images on Hyunjin’s chest, except that instead of color, there was only shadow. The priest sighed, his mouth pulling into a tight line.

“I had been afraid of this…” he said, shaking his head as he dropped his hands from you. Hyunjin immediately moved from his chair to kneel at your feet, his hands drawing nervous circles on your knees, his eyes shot with fear.

“This?” asked Hyunjin.

“I was worried…” the priest began to explain, “…when I saw how out of it she was when you two were first united. But, as you know, you’re the first couple that I’ve seen living the legend, so I myself am still learning was is true and what is mere fable. I also suspected that she didn’t eat or sleep well in confinement, so I was hoping that was the issue. I didn’t want to scare you unless I knew for sure, particularly since added stress would only make things worse…But then when I saw the same thing again yesterday, and then again today, and to see what I’ve now seen, I fear that…”

The priest took a deep breathe, steadying himself.

“The healer is correct that your baby is well,” he continued as he sat in the seat that Hyunjin had just vacated, readjusting his robes around him as he slumped in his seat, “And physically, you are well too but…spiritually, you are not. Your soul is acting as if it’s preparing itself for your bond to be severed.”

Hyunjin’s eyes snapped from you to the priest, and he took your hands in his. As if his physical attachment could prevent any other kind of detachment.

“Will it be?” asked Hyunjin, fearful, desperate. The crack in his voice revealing how his very core was splitting.

The priest shook his head, but his expression remained grim, the edges of his lips trailing downwards.

“The bond will still be there…but she might not be able to tap into it,” the priest responded.

At Hyunjin’s confused, terrified expression, he continued, “A destiny given by the gods is to be cherished, a gift…but when you mix the eternal with the mortal, it can be…dangerous. Sometimes our frail bodies can’t hold against the strain of what the gods have planned for us.”

He took a deep, solemn breath before continuing.

“I told you the first night we spoke of stories passed down of those who knew of their greatest destiny and actively rejected it. How it left them empty shells, just going through the motions of living, knowing that they would only live a shadow of the life they could have lived. A horrible fate.”

Hyunjin nodded slightly.

“But,” continued the priest, ”As horrible as that would be, knowing definitively that you are not living your best future is, in many ways, far less destructive than wondering if you are. If you know you are set on the incorrect path, and there’s no way to go back, you detach, allowing yourself to keep rolling forward. There is emptiness, there, of course, but also freedom in that there is nothing left for you to choose after that initial rejection.”

“But when you feel you still have a choice…that’s where the danger truly comes in. There’s a reason why we don’t tell men what’s written on their chests – without knowledge of their greatest destiny, one can hold onto the hope that they are on the right path, no matter how tough things might be in the moment. But, if we were to tell men what was written on them, the checkpoints they must pass – they would spend their whole life searching for them. Fretting. Consumed by it. So concerned in looking for the signs that they never live.”

He sighed again, looking down for just a moment.

“The danger for the both of you is even greater. Not only do you know the roadsigns, but you’ve started down that path together, bonded. Had a taste of what your future would be. But with everything that’s happened to you over to last few months, all the separation, your child being threatened…it has made you wonder again and again if your future is going to be torn away from you, if you’ve strayed from the path. And so you’ve been frantically searching for the roadsigns, terrified you may never see them outside your mind’s eye. This wondering if you accidentally chose to cancel your own destiny, blaming yourselves, trying to guess if and when your future will be torn from you, if you made a wrong choice, if you are making a wrong choice…the strain is enormous.”

“Eventually, that strain grows to be too much, and you reach a point where your soul and body give up. Burn out. Even if you logically know things are okay, your soul has already passed the critical point and will act as if the bond no longer has any weight in your lives. That you’ll never return to the path.”

You looked down at Hyunjin. He was obviously terrified, gripping at your hands harder than perhaps he intended.

Voice broken, he asked, “But why is this hitting her so hard now? Things have been…tough…for months. I’ve been careful, trying to watch for any issues since she’s pregnant, and I didn’t see – how could I miss this?”

His face dropped to the ground. He reminded you of you, back in the capital, trying to figure out how you had missed his burn. You pulled his hands to your lips, kissing them, a silent reminder that this wasn’t his fault, that you didn’t blame him.

“Honestly,” the priest replied, “Knowing now how much you’ve gone through, I’m surprised this didn’t hit her earlier. For bonded couples, temporary separation, even when there’s no risk of the separation becoming permanent, is a huge burden. This strain is actually something you both share, but it’s just hitting her much harder. Pregnancy makes her far more vulnerable. So with such a long separation, with no guarantee of reunion, and her pregnancy – I’m very surprised this didn’t hit her with full force when she was still traveling across the grasslands.

“And early warnings can be pretty subtle,” he continued, “It’s possible she was feeling signs earlier, but didn’t recognize them, did she ever start having a hard time remembering the images from your tattoos?”

Hyunjin’s eyes snapped to yours as you both remembered. How you had opened his shirt at your reunion, tracing your fingers across his skin to fill in the holes that had opened in your mind. You thought it was just a lapse in memory, exhaustion…

“Or was there ever a time where she felt like she couldn’t get close enough to you?” the priest continued.

You thought back to that morning on the grasslands when, smashed against his body, you still felt as if you were too far from him. How finally, desperate, you had asked him to slip inside you. Hyunjin’s eyes widened.

“She…yes,” he muttered, his eyes still on you, “But I didn’t realize…I thought it was just the exhaustion, her pregnancy…and then it seemed to go away. So I didn’t…”

“Ah,” said the priest, knowing, sympathetic, “It probably did go away. It was probably still early enough that your reunion was enough to soothe her, to reverse the course of things.”

His expression grew stormy, eyebrows knitting together.

“Cyrus’ choices then retriggered it. When he separated you, threatened to separate you from your baby…the stress was acute enough to bring you to this critical point where we now find ourselves.”

Hyunjin inhaled one shaky breath of air, the sadness and anger mixing in his lungs.

“So how do we…” he said, “Is there a way to fix this? Or is it – “

Permanent?

You filled in the end of his question in your own mind, and the priest appeared to as well.

“There are ways to combat it,” the priest replied, “So not all is lost. You’ve had your marriage ceremony, which should help. That makes the bond more official.”

“So that’s why you rushed the ceremony?” asked Hyunjin.

“Indeed,” the priest replied, “I had hoped that would be enough the reverse things, some sort of insurance, but alas…”

He paused for just a moment.

“And have you been…intimate since the ceremony?”

“No,” responded Hyunjin, “Not since the ceremony…I didn’t want to…since I could tell there was…”

The priest just nodded quickly, saying, “Understandable. That would probably help too, eventually. But – you both should wait until she’s sure it won’t add any extra stress. She’ll know when the time is right.”

Hyunjin nodded. His cheeks, already pink from the fear coursing through his veins, turned just a shade darker in embarrassment.

“I think the main thing is rest,” the priest continued, turning from Hyunjin to you, “You’ve been under such constant pressure, this constant threat of losing your whole destiny, in an incredibly vulnerable time. You need to relax, allow yourself that time to just be around him, to know that he is there, that he will continue to be there.”

“I should warn you, though,” he sighed, “There’s no guarantee here. I can’t predict what will happen. I hope for the best for both of you but…I just want to make sure you’re prepared for any outcome.”

Hyunjin squeezed your hands tighter as he looked to you again, eyes all worry, and you saw a question flit across his features. And then he swallowed hard, preparing himself to speak.

“Our baby…if she does…how would she…?” he whispered, choking on the words. He was unable to speak the full question into being, the words bitter on his tongue. Poisonous.

“How would she give birth if her soul detaches?” the priest translated.

Hyunjin winced at the unsheathed sharpness of reality, the poison traveling from his lips to his heart. But still, he nodded.

“Her body should still know how. It’s a reflex. But…I do have concern about how the baby’s development might be impacted if she does fully detach during the pregnancy. I don’t have data on that, if it would negatively impact the baby. And then of course the question of whether Lady Hwang will be able to be truly present, as their mother, as your wife.”

Hyunjin nodded again, eyes wide, refusing to look away from you.

“I wish I could bring more comfort,” said the priest, “Or that I didn’t need to tell you this at all. But I think at this point, you need to know. We just have to pray that everything will turn out okay, do our best to help things in that direction.”

He sighed again.

“Even if things do turn out okay, I must warn you - it will get worse before it gets better,” he said, “So just be prepared for that.”

His eyes moved, pointedly, from yours to Hyunjin’s. He knew that as hard as it would be on you, it absolutely break Hyunjin to see you like that.

But still, Hyunjin nodded. He would find a way to be ready for it.

~~~

Back in your tent, you were now consumed by a daze of a different kind – where everything had been blunted before, you now were too aware of your own thoughts, the shock, the way your heart still pounded painfully, the gnawing anxiety of waiting for the fog to envelop you again. Hyunjin had dutifully tucked you into bed as soon as you got home, asking if he could get you anything, but he too was mostly silent. You knew he was struggling to process everything too, and he was being careful to let any of his own emotions slip out in a way that might hurt you.

“I got you some tea,” he said as he walked back from the kitchen, sitting on the bedspread in front of you, a ceramic cup in his hands. Liquid swirled between them, its amber tone as warm as the steam that rose from its surface. He lifted it to your lips, helping you drink.

“Don’t want you doing anything too strenuous,” he explained, “No heavy lifting.”

It was an attempt at levity, but beneath it you could clearly hear his hard determination to care for you. Steel below cotton. You allowed him to tip it into your mouth, but among all the shock and fear, you felt a twinge of embarrassment. He was just trying to take care of you, to help, but part of you hated it. That you suddenly needed the help to do such simple things, that your independence was slipping through your fingers before you had time to process it.

And suddenly you found his sweetness cloying, his attentions suffocating, and the surge of frustration and anger hit you so hard that the words were out of your mouth before they even ran through your own mind.

“Gods you can be so overbearing, I can do it myself,” you snapped, and you immediately regretted it as you saw the expression that spread across his face as he slowly moved the cup away from your lips. A shamed puppy in retreat. The worry and panic in his eyes were now almost entirely eclipsed by hurt so raw he wasn’t even trying to hide it, the wound still too tender to touch.

“Oh Hyunjin,” you said reaching for him and pulling him to you, to comfort him, but also to hide the expression in his eyes from yourself. To turn away from the carnage you created.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean it, you’re wonderful, I’m just –“

You struggled to finish the sentence, to figure out exactly what you were. Terrified? Exhausted? Numb? Overwhelmed? Ashamed?

But Hyunjin understood, and softly said, “I know, baby, it’s okay. And I’m sorry if I’m a little too much, I just – I don’t know what to do. How to do this. I don’t want to – “

Lose you.

He didn’t say it, but you could hear it echoing loud in the silence.

You pulled him closer, and then both of you down to the mattress, allowing him to nuzzle into you, and you into him. And for a few minutes there were no words – just shaky breathing, the silent slide of tears, your skin on his. A quiet moment for you to mourn together what had felt so in your reach just a few hours before. You understood one another enough that neither of you spoke of it though, afraid the words would forge it into reality, like ice crystals forming from rain in frozen air. There was still hope, after all.

After a while, Hyunjin’s breathing evened out as he struggled to pull himself together, and then to pull himself away from you.

“How about you rest for a little?” he asked gently, gazing down at you, “And I get you some food? A nice warm soup?”

You nodded into his chest, kissing the exposed skin where the sides of his shirt had fallen open, and you felt the thump of his heart on your lips.

He responded by kissing your forehead, whispering, “I’ll pray over the soup,” he said, half-joking, half-serious, “For maximum healing powers.”

“Ah yes, magic soup,” you replied, chuckling against his skin, “At the top of the priest’s list.”

“It’s worth a shot,” he shrugged, “And things have been so wild, I wouldn’t be that surprised if there is a magic soup.”

You shook your head against his chest, still giggling, when you felt your hand fall on your cheek, tender.

“Is it okay if I get up?” he asked, “I can stay here with you longer too, just don’t want you to be hungry.”

“Yes, I’m sure I can survive a few minutes without you,” you said, “Not my happiest minutes, but they’ll do.”

He beamed before whispering, “I’m so lucky to have you,” thumb trailing across your cheek. But, remembering that he might not always, the smile slipped from his face before he could stop it. He readjusted as best he could, trying to regain composure so you wouldn’t see his doubt.

“Can you try to sleep for me, baby?” he continued, “I’ll be right back. Just a few minutes.”

You nodded, already closing your eyes, letting the sheets, and then sleep, envelop you.

~~

You were in your hometown, in the tent that you had always lived in by yourself. It looked just as it always had - warm and comforting and safe in its isolation, just as it had before your journey with Hyunjin. Clothing was folded across your bedspread, supplies stacked in a corner. This must be before you had ever left.

You walked over to the pile, sorting through cords and tools, before standing up to stretch. And then you caught a glimpse of a color you didn’t recognize as your reflection flitted across a metal bowl in the stack, and you leaned down to get a better look.

And that’s when you saw: gray hair, a deeply lined face. This wasn’t before you met Hyunjin. This was long, long after.

And then you noticed, with a pang, an emptiness in you. You had grown so accustomed to Hyunjin, your connection to him so deep that you had lost track of all the places that he had taken root in you. But now you felt exactly where he had been, the love replaced by only space, as if the tree of him and its roots had long since died, rotting away, leaving no trace behind except the imprint of where he had once grown into you. There was no feeling, no warmth, no love for him.

You bolted a wake, choking on tears, fingers gripping at your bedsheets. You told yourself it was just a dream, nothing more, but then you noticed how the emptiness still lingered in you. How you couldn’t feel him, just the space where he had once resided, and you felt a terror claw up your throat, your blood both ice and fire, burning you from the inside. Desperate to feel him back inside you, you bolted up, running to the kitchen, where Hyunjin stood over the fire, his eyes widening at your obvious alarm.

“What is it baby?” he started, immediately dropping his ladle so that he could reach his arms out to you.

You were too terrified by the chasm that had opened up in you to explain, afraid it couldn’t be refilled, so you just attached yourself to him, burying yourself against his chest. You shivered against him, each second of waiting stretching for decades, until finally you felt as his presence melt back into you, his warmth pooling into the space he had vacated.

“Okay baby, it’s okay, I’m right here, shh, I got you. I’m right here,” he cooed over and over, holding you to him. Even though he had returned to you, the panic still coursed through you, and Hyunjin let you cry it out of you against his shirt. He just stood like this, cradling you against him, until your breathing evened out.

“Baby,” he said, voice soft, kissing your forehead as his hand rubbed your back, “Can you tell me what happened?”

You debated how honest to be with him, whether it was fair for you to share your terror. But you knew, as much as you hated it, that he would want to know.

“I dreamed that you were gone, that I…never loved you. And then when I woke up…I couldn’t feel it,” you managed to gasp out.

You felt his breathing stop for a moment and you were relieved that, tucked into the crook of his neck, you couldn’t see his expression. He pulled you a little closer.

“Can you…now?” he asked, cautious, trying to keep the pain out of his tone. But you could still hear it around the edges of each word.

You nodded against his chest, and you felt him finally inhale, slow, a little shaky.

“Okay, baby, it’s okay. Let’s go back to bed, yeah? I’ll stay with you this time, okay?” he suggested gently.

You nodded against his shirt, and he picked you up, carrying you back to your bed. He laid you down before pulling himself to you, one hand cradling your head, the other drawing circles on your back.

“You can go back to sleep, baby, I’ll be right here. I’ll still be here when you wake up…in case of anything. I promise.”

You nodded, too exhausted from the fear that had ripped you to verbalize.

“I love you,” he whispered, so quiet you could barely hear.

And even with your exhaustion, you needed him to hear it too, so you plucked up just enough energy to mutter, “I love you too, Hyunjin” before the last of your strength left you, and you fell back to sleep.

~~

As promised, Hyunjin was still there when you woke up some time later, his hand still rubbing circles in your back. He had clearly had been watching you carefully as you slept, trying to keep the nightmares away with any sort of comforting touch that he could provide, hoping it would sink from your skin to your subconscious.

And you noticed, too, how close he was holding you. It reminded you of how he had held you weeks ago in the grasslands, forcing you to gently ask him to let you go as you overheated in his grasp.

You chuckled to yourself at the memory, and Hyunjin shifted, trying to see your face, to gauge if you had any nightmares, or if you were lost again to the mists.

When you saw your eyes were clear and the smile on your face, the tension in his muscles released, and he smiled down at you.

“How are you feeling now?” he asked gently.

“Better,” you said, “I don’t feel as panicked. It was just – sorry if I freaked you out, I was just terrified. To not be able to feel you anymore…”

“I know baby, don’t apologize,” he whispered, “I know how scary it must have been for you.”

Suddenly, your vision become blurry, the edges of the room softening, and your heart dropped.

And then, just like that, you were lost again.

~~~

While you were gone, you didn’t miss everything.

But you only got snippets, life too heavy for the vapors in your mind to hold, no way to weave the moments into a life, the touches and voices into people.

But you still heard, still felt, even if only for a moment, before reality evaporated.

A gentle touch dragging across your lips. And then down, pulling your mouth open.

Drink for me, baby, please.

Instructive. Anxious.

Cold against your tongue. You swallowed instinctively, a need you can’t name reaching from your veins, to your stomach, up your throat.

Just like that, you’re doing so good.

Dark and light.

Thunder. Lightening in the fog. The mists emptied into nothing, just black, deep. But it wasn’t purely empty, just vacated by a memory that you couldn’t conjure.

And something ripped through your lungs, up your throat.

Arms tightened around you. Fast.

Shhh, shhh. It’s okay.

Dark and light.

Cloth on your skin, light as clouds, heavy as the water above you. You were on the sea floor, looking up. Shimmering lights, the world distorted.

You had already know you were drowning.

Dark and light.

Warmth on your back, against your forehead. The back of your neck, wet.

Salt in your mouth.

Dark and light.

Dark and light.

Light.

~~~

You opened your eyes, muscles tense, groaning against a weight now evaporated.

“Baby?”

You looked to the right. Hyunjin was sitting next to you, his body leaning forward, ready to jump to your aid. He scanned your face, looking for pain, panic, or detachment, and, finding none, he beamed.

“You’re back.”

You nodded, returning the smile. You muscles ached, and your eyes too, unaccustomed to the light.

“Oh, thank the gods,” he said, reaching out his arms. And then he saw the way you winced as you moved, your lazy muscles protesting, and paused.

“Can I touch you?” he asked, reticent, “Is that okay?”

“Of course, baby,” you responded, beaming up at him, “Come here.”

And he did so, quickly, nestling his head below yours, arms around you.

“Missed you,” he breathed against your skin, “Missed you so much.”

“How long was I out for?”

He paused.

“Two weeks.”

“Two weeks?” you responded.

You shouldn’t have been that surprised – you didn’t have any sense of time when you were out of it. But still, to have passed two weeks of your life with no memories of it…it unsettled you. And what if next time it was two months? Two years?

What if it never ended?

You had tried to prepare yourself for the worst possible outcome, but when you had nodded at the priest, assuring him you would make yourself ready – you hadn’t really had any idea of the emptiness of it. More life than death, with only the fear left.

Sensing how you tensed in his arms, Hyunjin pulled away from you, propping himself up to look at you, to try to read in your face if you wanted comfort or silence, his touch or space.

Two weeks… You hadn’t been awake for two weeks of your baby’s development – what if there were issues? Were they okay?

“Is the baby okay?” you asked, a panic rising in your throat.

“Our baby’s just fine, my love, don’t worry,” Hyunjin responded gently, “I’ve been having the healers visit every couple of days to make sure you and the baby are both physically okay.”

You sighed in relief, and Hyunjin leaned in to comfort you.

As he shifted, you saw a flash of red in the folds in the blanket on his lap. A momentary distraction from your existential terror.

“Hyunjin, what’s that?” you said, pointing at the color that peaked out.

“Oh!” he exclaimed, moving himself upright and pulling the object out, expression a mix of sheepishness and pride.

He spread out his hands, an expanse of white fabric between them and a wooden hoop at the center. The fabric was dotted with about a dozen flowers, intricately embroidered, in every color. Pink and red carnations. Purple heliotrope. White hyacinth. A dark crimson rose.

“I thought we could use something to make things feel less drab in here, make it feel a little more homey. And since you can’t go outside right now, I thought I’d bring it to you, so you can still see the flowers bloom,” he explained.

You reached out, dragging your fingers across the intricate stitching. He really was good at this.

“It might be a while before it’s fully done, but it is good project for me to do here,” he said, gesturing to the bed, “ in case…”

You need me.

He wouldn’t say it but you then knew – he had been by your side the whole time over the last two weeks, watching you carefully. Ready to hold you if the nightmares struck, to give you anything you needed to keep your body here even if your soul wasn’t. Sacrificing his own sleep, his own energy, to keep watch. You heart swelled, the emptiness from before making the fullness almost painful, the feeling straining against your chest.

You reached your hand out, cupping his face. Gentle.

“Thank you,” you said, “It’s beautiful.”

~~~

The next few days – or weeks, you couldn’t tell – passed in much the same way. You were mostly gone, but each time when you returned for even just a few moments, you were gently welcomed back by Hyunjin.

You could only track the passage of time from the changing patterns between his hands, and the nightmares that woke you long enough to see them.

Blue salvia. Your baby never conceived.

A violet. At Hyunjin’s marriage with Lia, an ordinary guest.

Zinnias. Raising your child alone.

A pink sweet pea. A life alone.

~~

When you next awoke, a woman you had never seen before was sitting at your bedside, Hyunjin’s blanket folded neatly at her side, a scattering of baby’s breath across its surface.

You didn’t need to ask who she was – in the shine of her hair and the curve of her lips was the seed of beauty that had bloomed unrestrained in her son. And, above that, her eyes held the same softness that greeted you each time you awoke – Hyunjin’s gaze on you as tended to you, stroking your back even before you had returned to consciousness, aching to ease your transition back into being.

But, perhaps unaware of the obvious similarities, she proceeded to introduce herself.

“You’re up, sweetheart,” she whispered, smiling, “I’m Hyunjin’s mother, Kahi. How are you feeling?”

“I’m…” you paused, not sure how to proceed, “…okay, given the circumstances.”

You returned her smile, and even if it was weak, you knew it was warm.

“It’s so nice to meet you, I wish I could be a little more…” you continued, expression bashful as you gestured at your rumpled clothes, your disheveled hair. You had hoped that you would be your most presentable when you met his mother, not like this.

“Oh, dear, don’t worry about that at all,” she said, “I wish we could meet in happier circumstances, but still, it’s a pleasure to meet you, truly.”

You smiled, a warmth emanating from her that felt so Hyunjin. And while you didn’t want to be rude, to make her think you didn’t want her there, you also desperately wanted to see your husband.

“Hyunjin…?” you asked cautiously.

“He’s right here,” she said quietly, gesturing to the space next to you, and you turned your head on your pillow to see Hyunjin fast asleep, his hair spread across the fabric below him.

“He asked me to come keep an eye on you for a bit. He’s been quite stubborn about caring for you himself, but – “

She didn’t finish her sentence, but you could read its conclusion in the dark circles beneath Hyunjin’s eyes, the hallowness in his cheeks.

He was still as beautiful as ever, but there was now an obvious tint to his features of something you’d never seen before on him – mortality. The life that he had willingly drained out of himself to give back to you and your child. He was in a place beyond exhaustion.

Your eyes flicked back to Kahi as you saw her extend her arm towards him, and, catching the question on your face, she explained, “He asked me to let him know if you woke up.”

You were nervous about talking back to your mother-in-law within the first few minutes of meeting her, but you knew he needed this rest. You would be okay without him for a few more minutes, even if you ached to see him awake.

“Please,” you said, cautiously, “Let him rest some more. He’s exhausted, he needs it. As soon as he’s up he’ll jump to take care of me, but – right now I don’t think he has enough in him to give like he’s been giving. He needs to take care of himself first.”

Kahi nodded knowingly, resting back in her seat.

“Okay,” she smiled, “We can do that. Can I get you something though, dear? Tea? Water? Are you hungry? Need to relieve yourself?”

You blushed at that thought of your new mother-in-law helping to steady you over a chamber pot, but you tried to smooth it out of your face with your gratitude. As embarrassed as you were, you were so thankful she was here, offering to help, allowing Hyunjin to sleep.

“Some water would be great, thank you Lady Hwang,” you said.

She nodded, quickly getting up and moving to the kitchen, returning a few seconds later with cup in hand.

“Here you go sweetheart,” she said gently, careful to not be loud enough to wake Hyunjin, “And…please, call me Kahi.”

She smiled again, welcoming.

“Thank you, Kahi,” you said, smiling back, taking the cup from her.

She paused for a moment, a familiar guilt passing over her features, against a storminess you also knew well.

“I’m so sorry you are having to go through this,” she said, shaking her head, “Hyunjin explained everything to me. I’m so sorry I wasn’t able to protect you, didn’t stop it – I had no idea what was happening until it was too late. I didn’t even know Hyunjin was back until…”

She bit her lip, then looked up at you.

“Cyrus kept me in the dark, made sure I wouldn’t find out. He knows that all I want is to see my son happy, loved. I never even wanted him to go to the capital. He’s my only son…so he knew I would protest, if I knew. Not that it I have any power over Cyrus but, still…I suppose he didn’t want my input, any extra noise.”

You felt for Kahi, being married to a man like that. You never forgot how lucky you were to have Hyunjin, but it was times like this you felt it most acutely.

“To see you both now,” she said, the emotion pooling in her voice, “To see the way he looks at you, how you look at him, the way you are already growing your family…”

She took a deep breath, a tear rolling down her face.

“It’s all I ever wanted for him. So, thank you. And, anything you need, any hour, you let me know.”

You smiled.

“Your son told me the same thing,” you replied.

She smiled, glancing over at her son, proud.

“I’m going to go make a bit of food for both of you for when he wakes up – but call me if you need anything okay? I’ll just be in the kitchen,” she said gently, standing up, “It’s almost supper time.”

“Thank you, Kahi,” you said, “Really, I appreciate it.”

She grinned back at you, her eyes darting to Hyunjin for just a moment, expression fond, before turning on her heel.

You then relaxed back into your pillows, turning to gaze at your husband. You watched his chest rise and fall, the edge of his mouth twitch in a temporary smile. You hoped that he was only dreaming good dreams, that you held enough nightmares for both of you.

Watching your husband so at peace soothed you, and you found yourself once again drifting off, swallowed by sleep against your volition.

~~~

Your heart was racing.

Breathing heavy, your eyes screwed shut, you gripped the sheets, tethering you back to reality. You had no idea how long you had been out for.

There was then a hand on your back, and you were greeted with the comforting, familiar scent that you couldn’t describe any other way except your husband.

“Shh, shhh, baby, I got you, I’m right here,” he whispered, rocking you slowly, his voice cutting through the terror, taming it, “You’ll feel better soon.”

You wondered how often he talked like this, unsure if he was just speaking into the air, your ears impenetrable. You let out a slow breathe, the panic fading into his warmth.

“Hyunjin…” you whispered, weak. Letting him know you’re back.

You heard his sharp intake of breath, broken, and then a slow, relieved exhale.

“Welcome back, my love,” he said, pulling you closer, peppering your forehead with kisses. He then just held you for a few minutes, patiently waiting until your breaths quieted, your muscles relaxed against his.

“Better?” he asked gently, his hand now carding through your hair.

You nodded into his chest.

“Can I get you something? Food? Water? How are you feeling?” he asked.

You did a scan of your body, across your aching muscles, exhausted even though you felt like you hadn’t moved for days. But above that you felt grimy, like all the dust floating in the air over the last few days had settled on you, like the sweat had fused you to your sheets.

“I feel…kind of gross, to be honest. But otherwise okay,” you admitted.

Hyunjin broke away from you, his eyebrows knitted together. You noted the prominent dark circles that were still painted below his eyes, the pallor in his face, and your stomach immediately dropped, weighed down by guilt.

“I tried to wash you the best I could, and change your clothes,” he said, apologetic, “But I was a little bit afraid to…touch you…unless you were fully here.”

You reached out, placing your hand against his forehead, smoothing away the tension.

“I know baby, and you’ve taken such good care of it. Really, I’m so grateful,” you said, beaming up at him.

He grabbed your hand, kissing it, before his eyes returned to yours.

“Now that you’re back though, how about I wash you? I bet it would make you feel better.”

“That sounds, great, but I’m not sure I can it in me to get to a bath…”

“I’ll bring it to you, don’t worry,” he replied quickly, “I can wash you with sponges – that’s what I’ve been doing since you got sick. I’ll go get them and be right back.”

He leaned forward, placing a tender kiss on your forehead.

“You just relax.”

You shifting in the bed, readjusting yourself so that you were higher up on your pillows. Now propped up, you had a better view of the tent’s interior. Every corner was scrubbed, clean, and a gentle light came through the walls. Crumpled at the side of the bed, clearly tossed aside without a second thought when you had awoken, was Hyunjin’s embroidery. Today, the needle stabbed through the heart of a Hyacinth, frozen mid-stitch.

A few minutes later he returned with two basins, one full of clear water, the other frothy with suds, a sponge floating in each. He slowly placed each on the bed, careful not to slosh.

“You still okay with this?” he asked gently, “Do you need to rest for a bit?”

“I’m okay,” you replied, confident, “I feel pretty good right now, actually, all things considered.”

He beamed, the softness spreading across his face like sunshine, and he reached for the sudsy sponge, bringing it to your shoulder. He moved it in gentle circles, across every crevice of your body, focused intensely on the task at hand. But, still, with all his practicality, his exquisite nursing, you saw how his eyes caught for just a few extra seconds on your belly, your breasts, your hips. Taking in the way they had changed.

Once he was finished, he looked up, softly asking, “Hair too?”

“Yes, please,” you responded, and he smiled, before playfully picking up a pile of suds and stacking it on your head, massaging it through the strands. You giggled, and for a few moments you forget the heaviness of everything. You were grateful to him for it.

“I think we may need a bit more of a serious rinse,” he said, looking at his handiwork, “Can you lean forward a bit?” he said, “To keep the bedspread from getting wet.”

You nodded, leaning a bit forward so that your head was over the basin.

“Let me know if that gets uncomfortable, though,” he said as he dipped his hands in the water, cradling the little pool between his palms. He pressed his fingers together, but the water still dripped into the basin in rhythmic plunks.

He opened his palms over his head, allowing the warm water to trickle over your scalp. And then his hands were in your hair, massaging at your temples, combing through your hair. It was soothing, calming. You suddenly felt sleepy, eyelids too heavy to keep open.

“Tired?” Hyunjin asked, gently. You nodded.

“Come here,” he said, pulling your head to his chest, letting you lean against him, “We’ll just do a little rinse of your body and then we’ll be all done, and you can go back to rest.”

With one hand still on your head, he gently washed the rest of you with the other sponge. It moved in slow circles across your body, to your back, Hyunjin humming softly the whole time, until, eventually, the movements slowed.

“All done!” he whispered into your ear, and you heard the splash as he dropped the sponge back in the basin.

You expected him to immediately pry you away from him so that he could lay you back to rest as quickly as possible, but he instead just leaned further into you, nestling his face where your shoulder met your neck. And then you felt the pressure of his fingers again on your back and how they gripped at your skin, not hard enough to hurt you, but hard enough that it threw you off-guard. It was so unlike him.

And then you realized:

He was holding you as if you were water. Because he knew that, no matter how desperately he tried to keep you here, you too would drip through his fingers. He was already grieving you.

And so his firm grip on you had no roughness in it, only desperation. He held you to keep you close for as long as he could, but also to hide the way the missing you was already pouring out of him, staining his cheeks. But he couldn’t hide it from you – you still felt his ragged breathing against you, his body’s plea to the universe that he be given just a few more minutes.

“Oh Hyunjin…” you whispered, “It’s okay, I’m still here.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, “I’m so sorry. I’m just so scared.”

“Shhh, shh,” you said, gently rocking him. Your heart broke, but at the same time, there was something soothing in this – in you finally having a chance to take care of the man who had been taking care of you for weeks, to give him the support you knew he so desperately needed. You knew his mother came by to help when she could, but there was some things she simply couldn’t shoulder.

“The priest said it would get worse before it got better, right?” you said, “So maybe this is good. The storm before blue skies. And I’m here right now, and I love you so much. My incredible husband.”

He spent a few more seconds in your arms before pulling away from you, hastily wiping his face, and then wrapping you in a soft, warm towel. He gently dried you before, as promise, he lay you back in your bed, kissing you softly, muttering a quiet, “I love you.”

And, to your dismay, sleep took you quickly, your body again robbing time from you.

~~~

“Shhh, Innie, you’ll wake her!”

It was a woman’s voice, unfamiliar. Her whisper blared through the air, accomplishing the same thing that she had been warning against.

You blearily opened your eyes, and she slowly came into view as your vision cleared. She looked to be about the same age as Kahi, her expression lively, cheery, her eyes still glued across the room at the person she was talking to.

When she looked back, you saw her eyebrows rise in recognition.

“Oh, sweetheart! Welcome back!” she said with genuine warmth, “I’m Byul, Hyunjin’s aunt. I think you may have already met my son Jisung?”

“Yes!” you responded, “We met at the tent, however long ago that was.”

You turned to the other figure in the room. He was mostly looked at his hands, but he glanced up, and, upon meeting your eyes, quickly looked back down, seemingly spooked.

“And that would mean you’re Jeongin, right?” you asked gently.

He glanced up again briefly, seemingly lost for words.

“Innie,” the woman called, “Say hello!”

Only then did he clear his throat, and before saying, in the quietest voice, “hello lady hwang”

He caught your eyes and just the tiniest of smiles spreading across his cheeks. Warm. He was sweet and kind like his brother, but he hadn’t yet learned how to mold that good into something that could be of use to him, into any sort of charisma. And you didn’t think any less of him for it.

“It’s lovely to meet you, Innie,” you said, “Truly, you seem wonderful, just like your brother.”

His gaze now settled more confidently on yours, his fear a little tamed, the smile spreading to a grin. He was pleased by the comparison.

“Yes, I got lucky, my boys are such sweethearts,” she said, “That’s probably why I have a soft spot for Hyunjin. Always such a sweet boy, just like my babies. That and the fact I spent so much time with him when he was younger, poor dear, his father never did give him much attention. I always appreciated how well Cyrus took care of my boys after my husband’s death, but to see him treat them better than his own son. My heart always hurt for him…”

“But now he has you,” she continued kindly, her face softening even more, “Oh, he’ll be so happy when he returns, to see that you’re back.”

“Where is he?” you asked.

“He’s…out for a walk,” she said, eyes just the slightest bit evasive, “He needed…a moment, I think. Stubborn though, that one. But his mother and I suggested it to him, assured him that one of us would watch you if he was away.”

You nodded. You ached to know exactly when he would return, but you didn’t want to be rude to your guests, so you simply nodded. You would wait patiently, deciding that you would pass the time as best you could learning more about your new family.

You soon found that Byul was a natural storyteller. She told story after story about Hyujin’s childhood, the clan, the history of their family. As the evening continued, even Jeongin began to grow more comfortable, chiming in here and there always with a timid smile.

And then, part way through a story about Byul’s first days with the clan, you heard a rustle, and turned to see Hyunjin entering, his tired eyes wide.

“My gods, you’re back,” he said, “I shouldn’t have let them convince me, I should’ve been…”

You knew then that when Byul said that she and Kahi had suggested he take a break, she really meant forced. But you were grateful to them – you could see in the gray cast of his face that he clearly needed a moment away from this closed bubble of illness, to unpack his burden for just a moment to stand in the sun.

But still, you were overjoyed that he was back, and, as his guilt melted away, it was clear that he was overjoyed too.

“Baby…” he breathed, moving quickly to the bed, and pulling you into his arms, nestling his face into your neck, “How are you feeling?”

“Okay, tired,” you responded, “Mostly happy to see you.”

He broke apart from you beaming, and then shuffled off the bed before getting to standing.

“Does stew sound good?” he asked, “I made it earlier, and you must be hungry.”

“Ah!” you said, playfully, “Branching out from soups since my last visit? A stew…how adventurous Hyunjin.”

He giggled, a blush spreading over his cheeks, and you reached down and kissed his hand. “That sounds perfect Hyunjin, thank you.”

He nodded, kissing your hand before walking away, a cautious eye still on you.

As he rekindled the fire, Byul continued the story that she had been telling before Hyunjin returned, and you sunk back into your pillows, comforted by the life around the, the glow of the fire. You glanced over at Hyunjin, now gently stirring the contents of a pot, when something clicked.

“I’m so sorry to interrupt, Byul, but – Hyunjin!” you called.

He looked up at you in alarm, quickly responding, “Yes baby? What is it?”

And then you saw a flash of recognition, a spark of hope.

“The gold…” you whispered.

Cognizant of your guests, he turned away from the group, and you and saw the movement of his arms as he quickly undid his shirt. When he reached the bottom he paused for a moment before he hastily pulled the sides together, and turned to you. He nodded, eyes wide, expression overwhelmed with emotion.

“You, cooking over a pot,” you said, smiling, “It was the first image I saw, when I first touched you.”

Your eyes were so locked on Hyunjin that you didn’t notice Byul quietly pull together her things, silently signaling Innie to do the same.

“Innie, let’s let them have their time” she said softly, prompting you to finally break your gaze with Hyunjin, “And it’s getting late! We could all use some rest.”

You thanked Byul and Innie effusively, inviting them to return whenever they would like. And as soon as they exited, Hyunjin was immediately back in bed with you, holding you close, kissing you everywhere.

“You remembered baby,” he whispered, “You remembered.”

The next morning when you awoke, the fabric between his hands was newly decorated with a snowdrop. The earliest sign of spring.

~~~

The next few weeks passed in a blur of soft touches and even softer kisses, in bowls of soup and cups of tea, in the caress of your blankets and the gentle press of sponges against your skin.

Innie, Byul, and Kahi stopped by often, and you were grateful for their company when you were awake, the way it allowed Hyunjin to relax, even if only a little. There was something soothing in the normalcy of sharing a cup of tea with family, chatting about their days, even if the merriment was cut short by exhaustion or your condition.

Time felt like it stretched for eternity, and yet was somehow racing ahead of you.

But somewhere, in the middle of it all, you started to feel better.

The healing was a gentle thing, peaking its head in on some mornings, something brushing itself against you at night, almost always in the wake up your husband’s hand. But the fog cleared, the pain subsided, and soon you found yourself more propped up in bed than horizontal, restless to return to the world.

Finally, at your request, Hyunjin had called in the priest.

~~~

When the priest cast open the canvas doors, striding in, you watched his face carefully, trying to gauge his reaction. Standing to your left, with a hand on your shoulder, Hyunjin surveyed the priest, possibly even more nervous than you were. The tension in your shoulders immediately melted when you saw a cautious smile spread across the priest’s face, and Hyunjin squeezed your shoulder as he felt the change in your body.

“I must say,” said the priest, walking over to seat himself on the edge of the bed, “I am happy to see you like this, Lady Hwang. You husband has been keeping me updated, and for a while I was worried but…you seem much improved.”

“So…” asked Hyunjin, tentative, “Is she…will things be okay?”

“Has she detached over the few couple of days? Any nightmares?”

Hyunjin shook his head. The priest’s smile widened. Warmer. More confident.

“I think we are past the worst of it then. Of course, I would recommend resting for a few more days, just to replenish yourself, but I think your bond is safe. She is safe.”

The priest looked upward, giving Hyunjin a soft smile, acknowledging his hand in your recovery.

“So, when can I go back to normal life?” you asked.

“This will always be with you, in some form or another,” he said, “But I think you’re ready to go back to living again. But just take it slow. There’s no need to rush, to push yourself. Do things only as you feel like you really want to do them again.”

~~~

A few days later you woke up and noticed, spread across you, Hyunjin’s blanket. Hundreds and hundreds of flowers in every tone. Lilacs and sunflowers and daises, roses and daffodils. In every shade of every color. It was done.

To anyone else, it would just seem like an embroidered blanket. Pretty, a nice decoration, but nothing of note.

But you saw the truth of things. Every stitch in each of those hundreds of flowers represented a single moment of your husband loving you. A moment when he had refused to leave your side, making himself ready to do whatever he could to wipe away your pain, just waiting to give you what you needed.

And between each of those stitches, invisible to all except you, were all the moments, even more numerous, when he had actively tended to you. When he had dropped his stitching to pull you into his arms, rocking you slowly as you cried, as your panic subsided. All the moments he had cooked for you, cleaned for you, gently bathed your body with a soft sponge. Never once complaining.

You loved him.

You loved him.

You loved him.

And you wanted to show him, just as he had showed you.

You called Hyunjin’s name, and he quickly scurried from the kitchen, expression all worry, teapot still in hard. He had been making you tea.

“You okay, baby?” he asked, “You need something?”

You nodded slowly, and he cocked his head.

“What do you need?”

“I need you,” you said, a coy smirk on your lips, “I’m ready.”

You saw his breathe catch in his throat, followed by a hard swallow. He gently put down the teapot.

“Are you…sure? We can wait more, there’s no rush,” he said gently as he moved to sit at your side on the bed. He grabbed your hand, drawing gentle circles into your palm.

“I’m sure,” you said, definitively, “It’s been so long, I miss having you like that. And I am feeling good now.”

He nodded, but you saw the reticence still lingering in his face.

“Okay,” he said tentatively, the circles on your palm less reassuring and more nervous, “But we’ll go slow. And you tell me if anything is too much, or if you need a break, okay? Anything at all, promise?”

“Yes, baby,” you said, reaching out and pulling him down to you. The need was rising in you quickly, the heat pooling between your legs. You needed him now.

He was careful to stay lying at your side and not put any pressure on your belly as he pressed his lips to yours, kissing you slowly, deeply. But there was something in it that felt almost…chaste. He was going through all the motions he normally did, but with none of the fire. He wasn’t letting himself go.

You broke away slightly, your eyes moving to his, muttering, “Baby, it’s okay, you won’t hurt me, I promise. You can relax.”

He nodded slightly, but he bit his lip, still nervous.

“I’m just afraid you’ll leave yourself again,” he admitted, “That partway through you’ll be gone and I won’t realize…and I don’t want us to do anything if you’re not here. I don’t want to hurt you, to do anything I’m not sure you’re okay with.”

You placed your hand gently on his cheek, reassuring him. You understood how, after so many months, it would be hard for him to leave his caution behind, to untether himself from responsibility. And you appreciated how much he cared for you, wanting you to feel comfortable and safe. But still, you ached to have him touch you passionately as he had before.

“I’m back Hyunjin,” you insisted, “I feel like myself again, you don’t have to worry about that.”

He took one slow, deep breath before nodding, giving you a small smile, and simply saying, “Okay.”

He leaned down again, his lips connecting to yours. But you could still feel the trepidation in his touch, practically hear the way his brain was whirring, looking for any signs of distress or detachment in you.

And then, suddenly, an idea bubbled up, and you put a hand to his chest, stopping him from leaning in further. He immediately broke away, looking at you with alarm.

“Did I do something wrong?” he asked, his voice just with an edge of panic, “Did I hurt you?”

“No, baby,” you said quickly, eager to reassure him, “But I need you to relax.”

And then, you pushed against his chest, rotating his body, and the alarm in his face softened to confusion and then curiosity. He allowed you to reposition him, relinquishing control, his head hitting blanket, a spread of poppies beneath his hair. His gaze was still on you as you swung a leg over his, seating yourself on his abdomen. You stared at him as you began to undo the ties on your dress, and you saw his breathing stop for a moment in anticipation. As the last tie came undone, you felt his hands, insatiable, connect with your skin.

You were at about five months now and notably bigger than the last time the two of you had been intimate. While he had seen your body change as he tended to you, he hadn’t been able to truly touch you, to have you in this way. You gave him a few moments with your new body, eyes alight with wonder as his hands caressed your new curves, the new stretch marks on your belly, reverent. They then trailed down to the sensitive bud between your legs, rubbing in gentle circles. Preparing you to take him.

But you just shook your head, placing your hands on his, pulling them away from your body. His eyebrows knit together, and he looked up at you, confused.

“But…prepping?” he asked, tentative, still trying to figure out how exactly this was going to proceed, “I don’t want to hurt you, baby.”

“Don’t worry,” you said, leaning down to tenderly kiss his neck, leaving him shivering beneath you, “I got this. You just relax for me.”

You then leaned forward just slightly so that you could place his hands by his head.

“And no touching,” you said, “I don’t want you to even think about my pleasure, this is about you.”

And he opened his mouth to protest, but you interrupted him with a quick –

“Ah! No touching okay? Be good. Can you do that?” You knew he wouldn’t argue with a direct request from you.

He nodded slowly, the confusion on his face mixing with an expression you had never seen before in him. A spark of something.

“Good,” you said, smiling down at him, caressing his face. Seeing his hands clench as he restrained himself from touching you back, you quickly added, “And you tell me if you’re uncomfortable at all, okay?”

He nodded again, his words seeming to have flown away.

Only with his confirmation did you adjust yourself on his abdomen, angling yourself forward until you felt just the right pressure on the most sensitive part of you. And then you began to grind yourself against his abs, his torso, your clit rubbing deliciously against his skin. You looked down at the patterns on his chest as you glided over them, immediately feeling the heat pool between your thighs and against his skin. To have the most intimate part of you rubbing against what was, in truth, the most intimate and sacred part of him, a part of him only you had ever touched – your head was spinning, your heart pounding.

Hyunjin, it seemed, was no less affected. Even though you were not touching his cock at all, he still moaned - loud, broken, desperate, his whole lower body bucking at the intense arousal of seeing you shamelessly using his body for your own pleasure.

Just as you felt yourself approach your precipice, you heard him moan out, screwing his eyes shut, “Please, baby, please let me inside you. I’ve been so good. I’m so hard it hurts, please.”

You reached out, cupping his face again, in awe at the beautiful, precious man below you, twisting beneath you in his need.

“Of course, baby,” you whispered, “Whatever you want. Whatever feels good for you.”

He only whimpered in response, and you sat back, looking down at where his penis lay, its head red and angry, glistening with his own arousal.

“Oh baby,” you cooed, “You must be aching. Let me take care of you.”

And then you slowly positioned yourself above him before sinking down, and he responded with a groan that transformed into a cry, his hands gripping at the sheets.

“You okay, baby?” you asked. You assumed he was only responding to the pleasure, but you had never heard him quite like this before.

“Yes,” he just managed to whisper, “Yes, fuck.”

“Okay, good,” you responded, leaning forward to place a tender kiss on his lips. And then, just as he began melting into you, you began to move, squeezing around him, and he felt him moan against you.

You sat up again, now moving more quickly, chasing his high for him, your hands planted against his chest. The images of your life flashed in your mind from time to time as you shifted, but no image of what was promised to you could compare with the one you looked at now – Hyunjin below you, writhing in pleasure, finally letting go.

And then you saw, suddenly, Hyunjin’s eyes begin to brim. He was overwhelmed with emotion, not just because he finally let himself lose control, but because you now, after so many weeks, were finally enough yourself to take control. He had been so afraid that you would never fully return to your body, so to have you here, present enough to take control of both of your bodies – his heart burst with the joy of it. And so, now fully relinquishing himself to you, fully open, tears began to leak from his eyes.

“Oh baby,” you said, stopping for just a moment, wiping away his tears, “Are you okay?”

He nodded, simply saying, “Happy,” smiling through the emotion.

You kissed him again before you began to ride him once more, and you saw in his eyes something that you couldn’t quite describe, wild yet soft.

You had seen wildness in him before, the edge of it sometimes slipping out in moments like these. Arrogant, confident, bordering on rough - a side of himself that he had never let you fully see.

But now, he was wild in a different way. Wild like the wildflowers spread below him. Supple. Pliant. Letting you pass through him like the summer wind.

He whimpered below you as the ecstasy bloomed in him, but there was an edge to it too – not just a pure expression of pleasure, but of a want unfulfilled. You followed his eyes as they trailed down your body, across your breasts, to your stomach, your hips. They had that same glint of hunger you had seen in him the first time you touched him and the first time that he was inside you.

You realized, then, how he ached to touch you, how desperate he was, even though he would never ask for it directly in this state, especially after what you had asked of him. You couldn’t resist giving him what he wanted.

“Okay, baby, it’s okay, you can touch me,” you whispered, pausing for a moment to pull his hands to your hips. You immediately saw relief in his expression, and then hunger as he trailed his hands across you, gripping the skin, but always gentle. He cupped your breast, his thumb circling your nipple, and you moaned at the feeling that radiating from your chest to your core.

“Good for you?” he said, eyes wide, pleading.

You weren’t sure if he was asking if this felt good, or he was being good for you, but the answer to both was ‘yes’, so you leaned over, pressing your lips to his, before tenderly trailing down his neck as he clutched onto your back.

“So, so good,” you whispered against his skin, “Feels so good, you’re so good for me Hyunjin, the best.”

And then between kisses:

“So kind…So gentle…Treating me so well…Taking such good care of me…”

At your praises he bucked up into you, and as he hit that spot deep in you, you moaned, the corner of your lip rising.

“Fucking me so good.”

And then your lips back to his.

“You’re perfect, Hyunjin.”

He whimpered at your words, and you felt his hand move down your stomach, between your legs, just wanting to be the best he could for you. But you stopped him.

“No, no, baby,” you said, pulling his hand to your lips, kissing his palm, “What did I say? This is about you.”

And then you remembered, on the grasslands…

You moved your lips just a few centimeters down from his palm, pressing them gently, experimentally, onto the delicate skin of his wrist.

His response was immediate - a moan so loud, so broken, that if you didn’t know better, you would have thought you had hurt him. And so you began focusing on his wrist more intensely, kissing and sucking, Hyunjin twisting below you.

“I’m gonna…” he choked out, eyes desperate. He was so fucked out that he couldn’t finish his sentence, but you knew what he meant.

“Come for me baby,” you whispered, “Remind me how it will feel when you put another perfect baby in me.”

At your words he squeezed his eyes together, groaning low and deep as he came undone inside you, gripping at your sides. You slowed your movements, helping him ride out his high, before gently moving yourself off him. You lay back down next to him, reaching out to gently stroke his hair.

He hummed at the contact, but you could tell he was still a little distant, a little overwhelmed by all the emotion and the state you had coaxed out of him, so you just let him nestle into you, staying silent as his breathing returned to normal.

Finally, you asked, “Baby, you okay? All good?”

He nodded into your neck, and you smiled as he pulled you closer, burrowing further into you. You sighed, knowing he wouldn’t love your next move.

“I’m going to get up for just a second, okay?” you said, “So I can clean you up, so you’ll be more comfortable.”

You slowly, gently pulled away, and he whined at the lack of contact. You placed a reassuring hand on his cheek, whispering, “Shhh, shh, I’ll be right back baby.”

As promised, you returned a few second later with a warm cloth, gently wiping at the remains of his release, careful not to touch too firmly where he was still sensitive. You then cleaned yourself up before coming back down to him, pulling him close. He sighed in relief.

“Can I get you anything?” you asked.

“Just hold me,” he said, “Just want you to hold me.”

And so you did, pulling his head up so he could rest against your breasts. Held gently in your arms, he immediately fell asleep.

~~~

The next morning when you awoke, Hyunjin’s head was still on your chest, his hair spread across your skin. He looked peaceful, content, his muscles fully relaxed as his head rose and fell with your breaths. You cradled his head, gentle.

At your touch he stirred, opening his eyes, smiling and crinkled as they met yours.

“Sorry baby,” you whispered, “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“Don’t apologize,” he said, moving his head slightly to kiss your breast, “This is the best thing to wake up to.”

You smiled, letting your hands twine more deeply into his hair.

“How are you feeling this morning?” you said, “I know last night was…intense for you.”

He turned, sincere eyes meeting yours again.

“It was…but it was also perfect,” he said, “I haven’t felt that relaxed in forever. To just let everything go like that, I didn’t even know I could do that, but…”

Just a tinge of worry entered his eyes.

“I never made you come, did I?”

You smiled. He truly was thoughtful, always.

“Only because I wouldn’t let you. It wasn’t for your lack of trying, if you recall.”

He giggled against your chest, the memories flooding back.

“I wanted last night to be all about you,” you explained, “You’ve been taking such good care of me, putting my needs before yours. Wearing yourself out for me. I wanted to give you some time where you didn’t have to think about anything other than feeling good. I won’t ever be able to repay you for how well you’ve taken care of me but – I wanted to pay back a little bit.”

“The best wife, truly,” he said, kissing your chest again, and then your lips, “And there’s nothing to repay.”

“But…” he said, his right hand trailing slowly down your chest, your stomach, between your legs…

“Let me take care of you now, yeah?”

You were about to protest, tell him it wasn’t necessary, but the combination of the way he looked at you with such hunger and devotion, and the pleasure that had begun to burn in you melted your resolve, and you nodded, kissing him.

And then he descended, beneath the flowered blanket, faster than you could process it, his eyes on you the whole time as he separated your legs, kissing your inner things from knees to your center, before finally reaching your core. Fuck, you had missed this.

He had always been good at this, knowing just where to lick, to suck, to get you screaming. But there was a new undercurrent in his movement, a true hunger that had him devouring you, like he never could, and never would, get enough. After so many months of being disconnected from him in this way, the image in front of you – your thighs over his shoulder, fingers gripping at your legs, his face buried in your cunt, looking up at you with devotion and love every few seconds – made you dizzy with arousal. You felt the pleasure rise quickly, and you choked out, “Fuck Hyunjin, I’m so close, don’t stop, please” as you gripped the sheets, his hair. You heard and felt him moan into your core, and only a few seconds later the wave crested, crashing through you, your legs tightening around his head.

“Fuck Hyunjin,” you panted, now gently stroking his hair, “You’re so good.”

“Please,” he begged, now kissing the soft skin of your inner thighs, “Please let me give you another one.”

And then he looked up, hands still on your legs, asking, “Can I?”

“Yes, Hyunjin,” you breathed, “Plea-“

But before you could finish your word, his mouth was on you again, the pleasure stealing the letters from your tongue. He worked with the same frenzied intensity as before, his starvation apparent, his hands gripping at your thighs as they held you open for him. You felt yourself hurtling towards your second orgasm, and you threw your head back, moaning, your hands again in his hair as he brought you to your edge, when you heard:

A rustle of canvas.

And then a familiar voice.

“Oh I uh…oh gods.”

Your head snapped up to see Jeongin standing in front of you, mouth agape, cheeks aflame, before he quickly turned his head to the side, averting his gaze. Hyunjin immediately popped off your core, pulling the blanket that had been covering him over you.

“Sorry! So sorry!” yelped Jeongin, sounding like he wanted to vaporize himself to join the mists that had so recently left you, “I didn’t realize that you were back to…uh…Lady Hwang, my apologies.”

Hyunjin rubbed at his temples, and you blushed at the way his mouth was still covered with the remnants of you.

“Jeongin, you really shouldn’t…” he started. His voice wasn’t angry per say, but you could hear it bubbling just below the surface. Hyunjin knew it was just a careless accident, but while he had been hidden by the blankets, you had been fully exposed. He was afraid you felt violated.

But you just chuckled, reaching out to wipe your thumb across Hyunjin’s chin, smiling. He smiled back, relieved.

“It’s okay, Hyunjin. I’m okay. It was an accident, and looking at Innie right now…I think the mortification alone was lesson enough. And – “

You didn’t want to embarrass Jeongin too much, but you couldn’t resist…

“At least now he’ll know what kind of reaction to look for to see if he is really pleasuring a woman.”

Now even Jeongin’s hand had turned red with embarrassment, and you looked to see Hyunjin amused, with just a hint of pride. After so many months of seeing him stressed, you loved seeing him like this.

By this point Hyunjin had thrown on his robe, and he gently helped you into yours before saying, “It’s okay, Innie, you can turn around now.”

Jeongin did so slowly, cautiously, clearly still mortified but desperately trying to move past it.

“So, why exactly did you interrupt my time with my wife?” Hyunjin asked.

“That’s actually why I came in such a rush,” he said, still not quite making eye contact with either of you.

“One of the…we need you at the tent. It’s urgent,” he continued.

Hyunjin’s eyes widened at the emphasis that Jeongin put on “urgent”, the panic and gravity in his voice. Hyunjin knew that whatever it was, it was serious.

“Okay,” said Hyunjin, “Tell them I’ll be there shortly. I just need a few minutes.”

Jeongin nodded, before excusing himself from the tent.

“I’m going with you,” you said, placing your hand on Hyunjin’s shoulder, “Whatever we deal with, we do together.”

Hyunjin nodded, placing his hand on yours, squeezing it.

~~~

Chapter XI Coming Soon! :) 

~~~

Photo by Pascal Debrunner on Unsplash  

~~~

taglist: @hwangful, @currently-xuxi, @maedesculpaeusoubi,@4kwp

[the7thcrow]

just in case | hhj

pairing: hyunjin x (gn) reader.

wc: 8.6k

genre: fluff. angst. suggestive. romcom. office au. valentine’s day au. coworkers to lovers. slight enemies to lovers.

warnings: alcohol, heavy making out, a both snarky and unreliable narrator, all around just inappropriate behaviour for a workplace (but what else would you expect from an office au lmao.)

summary: your valentine’s day plans of bad cable and a bottle of wine take an unexpected turn, as when leaving the office you witness a completely different side of your least favourite coworker, hwang hyunjin. perhaps valentine’s day really does hold a little bit of magic.

a/n: this is so disgustingly late, frankly i’m ashamed. but life and such, you know how it is. this is for the sweet treats from skz event hosted by @districtninewriters. hope you all enjoy, and i’d recommend checking out everyone else’s works!! also i lowkey resent this fic for how long it has taken me, so i hope it’s okay.

Sunday’s are the worst.

With the office being full of coworkers hungover and regretful from the previous night’s little escapades, as well as consumed by the dread of being forced to work during the weekend, the air always seems to hang a little lower on Sunday’s.

Of course, today is no normal Sunday. Not at all, and it is apparent in the excited buzz and extra chatter that fills the office with a tad more enthusiasm than annoyance.

No, today is no normal Sunday, but rather Valentine’s Day.

Which depending on exactly who you are and the activities you have planned for the evening, could either mean that this particular Sunday is slightly better or worse than average. For some, it’s a night of romance - budding or long-term - of roses and chocolate and candlelit dinners, of longing glances and playing footsie under the table.

While for others, it’s nothing special, no significant other to share the night with, and the giddy attitude that fills the air is only slightly nauseating.

You are a part of this latter.

It should be made clear that you don’t hate Valentine’s Day. Frankly, an extra night just to celebrate the love in a relationship is really quite sweet, and you are not such a killjoy as to rain on other’s parades.

However, that doesn’t mean you can’t hate the way that people in the office treat Valentine’s Day. At least a little.

This particularly applies to Gahyeon, who is now peaking over your cubicle, a far too cheery smile on her face.

“Any plans for the night?” She asks sweetly, expression innocent, although you’re fairly certain she already knows the answer.

“No,” you say shortly, before realizing that might be too blunt, and frankly, a little rude. “Nothing tonight. You?”

“Felix and I are going out for drinks later,” she replies, a faint blush lacing her cheeks at the mention of her fiance. You’ve met Felix a few times, the blonde sometimes opting to come inside when picking her up after a later shift. He’s nice. Cute. A well-suited match for her, based on the very brief conversations you’ve had with him.

“We’re going to Dominique’s,” she adds, and you manage to refrain from letting your surprise show. Felix clearly has expensive taste, although you suppose the ring he gave her two months ago was already a pretty obvious indication of that.

“Well, I’m sure the two of you will have a good time,” you offer, returning to face your computer screen, assuming that the conversation is over and you’re free to return to your work. However, this is not the case, as Gahyeon continues to stare at you from over-top the cubicle, chin resting over top of her crossed arms.

“I got you a gift,” she says, causing you to twist your chair to face her once more, raising an eyebrow. She disappears back into her own space, searching for whatever she wishes to give you.

“Here,” she calls out, before once again popping her head back up into your line of sight. She has a gift bag in her hand, one that is so narrow and tall in length you already have a good idea of what it might be.

After taking the bag, you find your assumption proven correct, as you pull out a rather hefty bottle of wine.

You stare at the gift, before flickering your gaze back to Gahyeon. It’s not that you don’t like it, in fact, it’s your favourite brand. Even a tad more expensive than you typically let yourself reach for, unless for a special occasion.

You’re more so just confused as to exactly why Gahyeon would be giving you a bottle of wine, on Valentine’s Day none-the-less.

Her smile falls slightly. “Do you not like it?”

“No!” You rush out, quickly changing your bewildered expression into a smile. You certainly don’t want her to feel bad for getting you a gift, however strange it might be. “I mean, no - but not no as in no I hate it - sorry, yes. Yes, I like it. Thank you.”

She smiles again, and you let yourself relax slightly, taking a breath. “I’m more so just a bit lost,” you continue, examining the bottle once more. “What is this for?”

“Well, I assumed for drinking, although I guess that’s ultimately up to-”

“Gahyeon.”

She sighs, eyes softening with what you can only recognize as pity, “Well I don’t know,” she begins, before trailing off. “I just… Well, I just figured someone should give you something nice. I mean it’s Valentine’s Day after all, and well, you know.”

You’ve been doing a rather decent job at managing your expressions thus far, but your jaw falls open at the statement.

You’re a rational person. You’re certain she meant well by this, and it isn’t something cruel or a mocking jab at you.

But the fact of the matter stands that you never even told her you didn’t have a date for Valentine’s Day. Sure, you didn’t tell her that you did have one, but you made no indication for the opposite either.

And the audacity of the assumption - let alone the fact that you’d be so torn up about it that you’d need to drink your feelings away - is enough to render you momentarily speechless.

You open your mouth, unsure of what you can even say to such a statement, when fortunately you find you won't have to, as someone approaches both you and Gahyeon.

However, it quickly becomes unfortunate as you realize who it is.

“Oh, hi Hyunjin!” Gahyeon says sweetly as the man approaches. You discreetly slide the bottle of wine back into the gift basket, hiding it behind your chair. The last thing you need is for him to see it.

It should be made clear that you don’t hate Hyunjin.

He’s just… a little irritating.

Okay, maybe a lot irritating.

A tad arrogant, ego far too large for just one person. Sure, even you must begrudgingly admit the man is attractive, with long golden hair and striking features, but he would be a lot more attractive if he didn’t act so high and mighty about it.

He’s also a bit snobby, most of this deriving from when Chan was promoting people in your division a couple months ago, and he chose him instead of you. Not that you care, obviously. You both deserved it, both rather talented in your area of expertise.

Even if you have worked here for two years longer and have put in almost double the hours of overtime work.

But hey, who’s counting?

Not you, of course, because you don’t care enough about Hyunjin to really worry about such things.

He’s just a little annoying, that’s all.

“Hi, Gahyeon,” he says, plastering on as equally as sweet of a smile as the one she is wearing, before his gaze momentarily flickers to you, and when he speaks his tone is disinterested.

“Hey,” he says shortly, before immediately shifting his focus back to your coworker, and you can’t refrain from rolling your eyes.

“Who are the chocolates for?” Gahyeon asks. You hadn’t noticed it before, but Hyunjin holds a box of chocolates in his hands, bright red, gigantic, and in the shape of a heart.

A little cheesy, but you digress.

“Oh,” he says shyly, shifting his gaze away in an attempt to play coy. “Um.”

You know the bashful display is entirely fake and undoubtedly for attention, but Gahyeon eats it up, holding a hand to her heart as if moved.

“Aw, for a secret admirer maybe?” She guesses and when he laughs at the idea, she tries again. “Or a big date planned for tonight?”

Hyunjin chuckles, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly, and you resist the urge to gag.

Alright, maybe Valentine’s Day does make you a little extra cynical.

“Something like that,” he replies finally, before clearing his throat and changing topics. “But Gahyeon, the reason I actually came over here was to remind you that I need the numbers for the WENUS. So just swing by my office before leaving tonight, okay?”

“Of course!” Gahyeon says, giving the man a thumbs up as he begins to make his exit. However he stops for a moment, glancing over his shoulder to meet your eye, a smirk sliding across his lips.

“Enjoy the wine,” he chirps. You open your mouth to heckle back - something sharp and witty, you figure - but he’s already gone, disappearing around the corner and back towards his own office.

You glance over at Gahyeon, prepared to give her a half-hearted glare. She knows full well about the little tug-of-war relationship the two of you share, which means she also knows about how her gift undoubtedly gave him some new teasing material for the coming weeks.

And you know she’s aware of this, because she quickly disappears back into her own cubicle, the sound of typing immediately apparent as she begins to busy herself.

You sigh, turning your attention back to your own screen, fingers resting motionless on your keyboard.

Alright, so you don’t hate Valentine’s Day, but maybe you actually do hate Hyunjin.

~~~~

It’s just past 11:00 pm when you admit that it’s officially too late for you to still be in the office. Rubbing your tired eyes, which ache slightly from staring at a screen all day, you let out a dramatic yawn. The office remains dark, everyone already having packed their things and left for the night, to their own date nights and special holiday plans.

You rise to your feet, prepared to grab your things before heading home, to what will most likely be a night of wine and bad cable tv shows. Just the kind of activities expected of a single person your age on Valentine’s Day, but you find you no longer have the will to attempt fighting against the stereotype. You’re tired and the wine Gahyeon bought you is good, you might as well make the most of it.

However, your plans are put to a sudden halt as you glance over at Gahyeon’s desk, a stack of papers laying neatly beside her keyboard.

It’s the WENUS - the Weekly Estimated Net Usage Statistics - or in other words, the documents Hyunjin had specifically asked her to deliver to him before she left the office tonight, which was roughly 5 hours ago.

Biting the inside of your cheek to refrain from letting out another pained sigh, you instead decide to take the high road, slipping into her cubicle to grab the papers.

Gahyeon isn’t normally this forgetful, just another unfortunate symptom of Valentine’s Day you suppose. The papers most likely dismissed as Felix came inside to pick her up, roses in hand, a dreamy as well as grossly in-love smile plastered across his lips.

So you can’t entirely blame Gahyeon, because if someone ever looked at you with such a disgustingly enamoured look, you might forgot about the stupid WENUS as well.

You’re the only one left inside the office, and as you head down the hallway you’re certain you’ll have to simply slip the documents under Hyunjin’s door, the man having gone home for the night.

Or more likely, to the big date or “something like that” he said he had planned.

Which is why you’re completely caught off guard by the light brightly shining from further down the hall.

Raising a skeptical eyebrow, you follow the brightness, finding yourself before Hyunjin’s  not-at-all empty office. The door remains wide open and you discreetly peek inside, finding the man stationed at his desk, pen in hand as he quickly jots something down on a sticky-note.

Blonde hair messy and tousled as his chin rests in the palm of his hand, tie loosened and falling low below his collar, it’s a look you’ve never seen from the man. Always so put together, so perfectly poised with a level of arrogance attached, it’s almost a shock to see the mask fall, even if just for a moment.

“Can I help you?” He calls without looking up, voice monotone. Your hiding place behind the door frame must not be as discreet as you may have hoped.

You clear your throat, walking towards his desk and tossing down the papers. “I noticed Gahyeon forgot these, figured you would want them.”

“Great. Thanks,” he says, still not looking up at you, but taking the papers all the same. When he doesn’t continue, it’s an obvious cue to leave, and indication that he enjoys your company about as much as you do his. Yet, something in you stops for a moment, holding you in place.

“Didn’t you have some sort of big date planned for tonight?” You ask, and at that he finally looks up at you, his eyes full of an extra amount of irritation that you don’t quite understand.

“What makes you think that?” He shoots back, his scowl making itself even more evident. You gesture to the large box of chocolates sitting on his desk, which remains unopened.

“The chocolates and the conversation with Gahyeon earlier,” you explain, giving the man an incredulous stare. The two of you don’t get along, obviously, but surely he can’t be mad at your presumption, considering he practically told Gahyeon he had plans. “I just assumed.”

“Well, you assumed wrong,” he huffs, before immediately going back to his work, pointedly not meeting your eye. You scoff, turning on your heel to leave his office, having enough of the attitude for the night. You know that you too can be a tad haughty and dramatic at times, but Hyunjin really is something else.

However, before you can make it through the door, you hear a deep sigh that clearly does not wish to go unheard, and you stop in your tracks.

“I always buy a box of chocolates for Valentine’s Day,” he says quietly, and you turn back around to see the man lift the giant red heart in the air. He keeps his eyes fixated on his desk, clearly embarrassed by the confession, tone dripping with shame. “You know… just in case.”

“That…” You start, unsure of how exactly to respond to the admission, to the defeated look nestled in his eyes. It’s unsettling, and entirely not Hyunjin. “That is one of the saddest things I’ve ever heard.”

He scoffs, dropping the chocolates back down on the desk with both a thud and a matching glare. He looks annoyed, but you suppose that’s better than whatever defeated, as well as slightly pathetic expression he was wearing prior.

Hyunjin’s already annoying, you can’t possibly add self-consciousness into that mix.

“Okay, fuck you,” he cuts back, leaning back into his chair and crossing his arms, although you can’t help but notice there’s a lack of malice to the statement. Just slightly more of a playful jest than an angry rebuttal, although the irritation still isn’t entirely absent. It’s a bit strange, as the air between the two of you is almost always hostile, and honestly, you’re quite comfortable in that normalcy.

“If it makes you feel any better,” you continue, the words coming out before you truly give yourself a chance to contemplate them. “The wine you saw earlier? Gahyeon only bought it for me because she figured at least someone needed to give me something nice on Valentine’s Day.”

Now that brings a smile to Hyunjin’s face, as the man proceeds to let out a low whistle, as if to say: “Ouch, low blow.”

You chuckle beneath your breath. “The worst part is that I never even told her I didn’t have a date, she just assumed.”

He actually laughs out loud at that, and you realize that you’ve never actually heard the man laugh in a way that wasn’t condescending or snarky. It’s an awfully boyish sound -  as well as loud - and it’s enough to catch you momentarily off guard.

“No, the worst part is that she didn’t need to be told,” he quips, shrugging his shoulders. “She was right.”

“Okay, fuck you,” you cut back, although a grin sneaks it’s way onto the corners of your lips.

Okay seriously, what is wrong with you right now? You clearly need to leave this office and go home, because there’s no possible way Hwang Hyunjin just made you smile.

Instead, for some unknown reason, you hang in the doorway. A flash of something lights up in Hyunjin’s eyes - mischief perhaps - and he smirks. “Do you want to crack it open?”

“Huh?”

“The wine,” he clarifies with a nonchalant shrug. “It’s still in your office right?”

“I mean yeah, but…” You trail off, biting your inner cheek nervously. You’re not sure what the company policy on alcohol might be - as drinking at work has never been something you’ve considered - but other than the spiked egg-nog at the annual holiday party, you’re fairly certain it’s off limits. “Can we do that?”

“I mean, I’m sure we’re the only two here,” he offers, which you suppose is understandable. “Who’s going to care?”

When you don’t respond, still slightly apprehensive of the suggestion, he continues.

“Besides, do you really think Chan would mind anyway?” He says, referencing the head of the company, and subsequently, the boss of both of you. “He’s going to come home tomorrow from his romantic getaway smitten as hell. I bet he wouldn’t even notice if we were hungover off our asses.”

Another fair statement, Chan having taken the entire week off on a trip to Italy with his significant other. “A special Valentine’s Day treat,” he’d called it, never mind the fact that they do it annually, and this just so happens to be one of the busiest weeks of the year he’s left you all to deal with.

Yeah, you’re not the happiest with Chan at the moment, especially knowing he’s going to come back tomorrow completely love-sick and dreamy when you need him to focus.

Perhaps that’s why you don’t reject the offer, why you don’t immediately call Hyunjin out for being unprofessional. Tomorrow is going to suck anyway, and frankly, you could do with a little harmless defiance against Chan.

There’s also the unfortunate truth that today is still Valentine’s Day, and sharing the wine might be a little less sad than drinking the entire bottle on your own. Even if it’s with someone as insufferable as Hyunjin, the company remains company all the same.

“Alright,” you concede with a sigh, heading back out through the door. “Let me grab the bottle.”

~~~~

After half a bottle of wine drunk out of your office’s paper cups, and a box of chocolates the man had jokingly gifted to you (with only the slightly disgusting flavours remaining), you find yourself sitting next to Hyunjin at his desk. Having pulled an extra chair over from the office beside his own, you lay your head against your arm, which is spread out across the tabletop.

The last hour has passed by in a strange, as well as confusing fashion. You’ve found that Hyunjin perhaps isn’t the worst company in the world, all though you must admit, it doesn’t feel like you’re really with Hyunjin at all.

A man most often recognized for his meticulous demeanor, never seeming to have a hair out of place nor a wrinkle in his suit, now let’s this mask fall even more substantially than when you first entered the office. The knot of his tie now completely undone, hanging over the collar of his shirt, which is absent of its first few buttons and sleeves rolled up past his elbows. Long hair pulled back into a messy ponytail, and suit jacket thrown lazily over the back of his chair, it’s almost difficult to place him as the man you see near every day.

However, what’s most shocking to you is certainly not his clothing, but his personality.

The arrogance is still there, certainly. The cheap little jabs and teasing jokes, but accompanying that is a level of sincerity. Perhaps the spirit of Valentine’s Day has possessed the man, and now that it’s a few minutes past midnight he’ll go back to his normal cocky self, but you can’t deny that Hyunjin has been almost… sweet.

A surprisingly attentive listener, he let you ramble on about anything from Gahyeon and Felix’s sickeningly sweet relationship to the rise in gasoline prices, even chiming in with his own genuine thoughts and advice.

Frankly, you’re a little weirded out.

“I mean, it’s all very cliche. Don’t you think?” He says now, referencing your current topic of whether or not either of you actually like the present holiday.

“What about it is cliche?” You ask, hiding the whisper of a smile behind your wine glass.

“All of it,” he explains, waving his hands in exaggeration. He’s had a little more to drink than you have, the fact obvious through the slight redness in his cheeks, although he’s by no means drunk. Just comfortable enough to keep his guard down, which you certainly don’t mind.

“The flowers, the chocolate, the wine,” he continues. “Fancy dinner that overlooks the city skyline, or a moonlit walk along the beach.”

You snort at the sentiment. “I think you’re just describing the night you’d rather be having right now.”

You mean the statement as a joke, but Hyunjin simply smiles. “No,” he states, his voice soft. “I’d rather be here.”

“Well,” you chuckle lowly, sliding the bottle of wine towards yourself. “Then you must have had a little too much to drink.”

He reaches over, grabbing the neck of the bottle and preventing you from pulling it away any further. Other hand clutching the area over his heart and lower lip drawn out in a pout, he mocks fake offence.

“Why?” he laughs, and although his next question is said with a jovial nonchalance, you can tell there may be a weight behind his words. “Are you saying you would rather be somewhere else?”

A part of you considers answering yes, to tease and bicker and do what you always do with Hyunjin, play into the jesting match as per usual. But you find that something holds you back.

“No,” you reply. “I’d rather be here too.”

A moment of silence passes by, the only sound in the room being the ticking clock that hangs above the doorway. His eyes meet yours, and the corner of his lip pulls upward into a half smile.

“Good,” is all he replies.

After another short moment of silence, a nervous feeling beginning to turn with your gut, you clear your throat. You’re not sure what’s happening here exactly, why your body is tingling with a jittery anticipation, but you suppose it’s a sign that this strange new side of Hyunjin might be enough excitement for one night. “Well, it’s getting late.”

A flash of something passes along the man’s face, what you could almost recognize as disappointment. “Ah,” he says with a glance at the clock, the unavoidable truth that it’s past midnight and too late to still be at the office beginning to set in. “I guess it is.”

“I should probably head home,” you say, beginning to rise to your feet. You don’t manage to stand up fully however, as Hyunjin gently takes hold of your wrist, motioning for you to sit back down.

“Sorry, can I just say something first?” He asks, and swallowing down the worry that arises at the statement, you nod.

Hyunjin takes a deep breath. “Thank you for not feeling sorry for me.”

The look on your face must accurately show the amount of confusion you feel, as the man quickly clarifies. “I mean earlier with the chocolates, most people would just feel pity and try to console me for something like that. But you saved me the embarrassment, so thank you.”

You really didn’t think much of it at the time, but there is a level of truth to the statement. It didn’t even cross your mind to pity the man, and although it may have been slightly out of spite, you suppose if the situations were reversed, you wouldn’t have wanted him to make a big deal out of it either.

“But I don’t know why I’m surprised,” he shakes his head, letting out a small laugh as he seems to forgo his past seriousness. “That’s kinda our thing after all.”

“Our thing?” You ask, raising an eyebrow.

“You know,” he says, giving you an equally confused look at the fact you don’t know exactly what he’s talking about. “The teasing? The shots back and forth? That’s what we do, isn’t it?”

It takes a moment for you to register what exactly he’s saying, or rather the implications of it.

Hyunjin thinks teasing is your guys’ thing.

You just thought Hyunjin was an asshole.

Oh.

“Right, of course, our thing,” you say, doing your best to sound genuine, as if the two of you have totally been on the same page the entire time. As if you haven’t been cursing him under your breath every time he’s made a teasing comment. As if you haven’t called him arrogant and snobby for two years straight with honestly little to no substance behind it. As if you haven’t assumed every time he was being nice to another coworker, it was all fake and for his own personal gain and attention.

Hyunjin stares at you for a moment, the soft smile on his lips slowly morphing into a frown, eyebrows drawing together in puzzlement.

“You…” He trails off, mouth opening in a small “o,” before a look of mortification passes along his features. “You didn’t think we were joking, did you?”

“Well, not exactly,” you say, albeit a tad awkwardly, unsure of how to navigate the admission. In the end you decide to go with honesty. “Like I knew we teased each other, it just didn’t come off as very, you know, lighthearted to me.”

The horrified look Hyunjin wears only grows wider at the statement. Hands reaching up to cover his mouth, the man appears almost animated. “I am so sorry,” he says, words slightly muffled by the fingers that cover his lips.

“Don’t be,” you rush out quickly, reaching forward to take hold of his wrist, gently pulling his hand away from his face. “It was just a misunderstanding. If anything it’s a relief, so don’t worry about it.”

He seems to relax slightly at that, the tension leaving his shoulders, although he continues to chew on the bottom of his lower lip. “Well, I’m still sorry.”

You smile, the sentiment undeniably endearing. “It’s okay.”

He pauses for a moment, gaze focused intently at the bottle of wine, as if contemplating something. “I’m also sorry for taking the job,” he says suddenly.

The statement takes you by surprise. “What?”

“The promotion,” he elaborates. “ I know it was between you and I, and point-blank, you deserved it more than I did. I don't know what Chan was thinking, and I should have stepped back and let you have it. I’m sorry.”

It’s funny, you’ve spent the last two years wishing to hear him say those words. A deep dark part of you just wanting to hear him admit it, to acknowledge the fact that he got off lucky being Chan’s favourite. That it was you who deserved it. You, who was both more qualified and held seniority.

But now that he’s actually said the words out loud, only one response comes to mind.

“Shut the fuck up.”

Hyunjin’s eyes widen to the size of saucers. “Wait w-what?” He asks, words fumbled with shock.

“There’s no way in hell you would have, nor should have turned down an opportunity like that,” you explain, and it’s true. If the roles were reversed, there’s not even a chance you would have given up a promotion for him, and it’s not until now that you realize you never would have wanted him to do it for you either. “Don’t be an idiot.”

Eyebrows furrowing together, he stares at you in disbelief. “But you’ve been here longer, and put a lot more time into-“

“And I'm not saying I disagree with that,” you counter, because frankly, you don’t. “But throwing away this opportunity would have genuinely been the stupidest thing you’ve ever done. Don’t be a saint, we both know you’re not one, and neither am I.”

He watches you for a moment, eyes scanning your face carefully, as if looking for something. After a moment he swallows deeply, taking a deep breath as if to concede. “Yeah okay, you’re right.”

That should be the end of it, but something stops you from switching topics, an itch beneath your skin that says the conversation isn’t quite finished.

Possibly deriving from the fact that Hyunjin has always been good at the job - just as good as you are - and he doesn’t seem to be acknowledging that. Extra hours and seniority aside, the two of you have always been on rather equal footing in that sense, and you don’t think it's fair to go completely unannounced.

“And you are very talented Hyunjin,” you say softly, a confession of sorts. “You wouldn’t have gotten the job otherwise.”

He doesn’t say anything to this, but you don’t miss the way his cheeks flush slightly, the faintest hint of a smile appearing at the corner of his lip.

“So don't feel bad, yeah?” You finish, even placing your hand over his own on the desktop, hoping it comes off as reassuring. “I'm sure another opportunity will come around for me.”

He pauses for a moment, staring down at your hand over top of his own. Gaze fluttering up to meet your eyes, he finally allows himself to fully smile. “Alright.”

“Good,” you say simply, giving his hand a small squeeze, before removing it entirely. You go to have a sip of your wine - the paper cup having been momentarily forgotten - but don’t miss the way your hand shakes slightly. Almost nervous, it seems. Strange.

The smile on Hyunjin’s face suddenly shifts from compassionate to playful. “So you think I’m talented, huh?”

You roll your eyes, finishing your sip before answering. “Amongst other far less kind things, sure.”

It’s almost automatic how his face falls, smile dissapaiting into a frown, eyes hollowing of the newfound joy.

Shit. This is really going to take some getting used to.

“Sorry, force of habit,” you add, quickly trying to recover your mistake. “But yeah, I do.”

He seems to regain his footing at this, that small smile returning to his lips once more, granting you a strange sense of relief. “I think you’re talented too,” he says quietly, almost shy.

“Thank you,” you reply, voice equally as gentle.

It takes about ten seconds of smiling at each other in silence for the moment to become awkward.

“I’m sorry, I’m not very good at this,” he blurts out quickly, face flushing a light shade of pink.

“At…?” You ask, not quite sure what he’s trying to get at.

“Ever since the promotion, I really haven’t had much time to myself,” he admits, leaning backwards in his chair. “So I’m a bit out of practice with the whole, you know, flirting thing.”

Wait.

Wait, wait, wait, wait-

Flirting?

Is that…is that what he’s doing right now?

You stare at him, trying to get some tell that he might be joking. That this whole thing was just a game, that he’ll say sike, and then spill his cup of wine over your shirt and you can go back to the Hyunjin you know. The Hyunjin you somewhat despise, sure, but at least that irritation is comfortable. At least it’s familiar and something that you can understand.

This Hyunjin, the one that compliments you, tells you that you deserve his job more than he does, and flirts with you, he is anything but understandable.

To make matters even worse, you aren’t repulsed. The statement doesn’t make you uncomfortable nor grossed out, in fact, the reasoning behind your heart beginning to pound faster  is what you can only label as excitement.

You truly must be losing it.

You must be, as instead of putting a stop to the conversation, to the entire night by leaving his office and going home, you indulge in it. “I get that, it’s been a while since I’ve been on a date too.”

“Really?” He asks, clearly intrigued as he leans in a little closer, resting his chin in his palm. “How come?”

“Same sort of thing,” you reply honestly. “Don’t get me wrong, I love Gahyeon, I really do. The job would not even be half as interesting without her, but for the last couple months I feel like I have to do double the work. She has to go wedding cake testing one night, or bridesmaid dress shopping the other, and I always pick up her shift or stay later to finish what she couldn’t get to. I care about her, so I don’t mind doing it, but it can be tiring. Plus Chan already expects me to do extra overtime on top of that, because it’s what I’ve been doing for two years straight, and that just doesn’t leave me with tons of free time.”

It feels a bit weird, talking to Hyunjin of all people about this, considering you haven’t mentioned it to anyone in the office before. But he listens attentively, eyebrows drawn together in understanding.

“I know that’s not exactly the same thing,” you clarify, clearing your throat as if to shake off the vulnerability of the statement. “Because I’m doing it to myself, and you have a lot more responsibility in your position, but-”

“No, don’t say that,” Hyunjin quickly cuts you off, and this time it’s him who reaches forward to take your hand. “You still work equally as hard as I do, hell honestly even more. You deserve better than that, it’s not fair to you.”

“Yeah, but what can I do?” You ask with a shrug, because really, there’s not much you can do about it.  “I can’t stop working as hard, because Chan will see that as even less of a reason to promote me. And I hate to say it, but the dating world doesn’t exactly love a workaholic.”

He seems to consider this for a moment, before shaking his head in defiance.“Who cares about them?” He retorts, and you can’t deny it's sweet how much he seems to take offence on your behalf.  “Being a workaholic means you’re ambitious. You're hardworking and dedicated. I mean, who doesn’t want that in a partner?”

You snort at this, because if only it were that simple. “You'd be surprised.”

Hyunjin doesn’t seem to accept this as a viable answer. “Maybe you just need someone who’s also a workaholic,” he offers, reaching to take a sip of his own wine. “Someone who gets it.”

You smile at this, raising an eyebrow jokingly. “What, do you want to date me?”

He doesn’t even hesitate a moment before answering. “Sure.”

You blink.

It’s as if you can feel your eyes monumentally widen, granting him an incredulous stare. “I was kidding,” you state in disbelief, ready for him to laugh at the look on your face. To explain that he was joking, and just wanted to get a reaction out of you.

Except that this moment never comes, as Hyunjin simply stares back at you, eyes equally as wide but for different reasons. You are shocked and confused, but he seems more like a deer caught in the headlights. As if he has been caught red-handed, revealed more than he meant to.

But instead of back-tracking, instead of making some sort of excuse and pretending it never happened, he takes a deep breath. Gaze shifting to the ground momentarily, as if to steady himself, before firmly looking back up to you.

“Well you know what, I wasn't,” he says, tone blunt. It’s not even a semblance of a shy or earnest confession, but rather a fact, and he does not refrain from delivering it as such.

“Hyunjin-” You begin, unsure of what you’re even going to say such a sudden and bold statement. Fortunately, you find you don’t have to bother figuring it out, as he immediately cuts you off.

“No, hear me out,” he starts,  “We’re both workaholics, we’re intellectually compatible, we’re both attractive.”

You hate the fact that instead of attempting to argue this, you’re momentarily both taken aback and flattered by the fact that Hwang Hyunjin finds you attractive.

“We won't get annoyed if the other person has to pick up extra shifts or stay late,” he continues, not even stopping for a breath. “We have the same sense of humour-”

“Okay Hyunjin, I get it,” you cut in, feeling a tad overwhelmed.

Because really, is anything he’s saying wrong? No. Is it unfair or manipulated or just plain ridiculous? Also no.

But at the same time, it’s also Hyunjin.

“Come on,” he says, his tone finally shifting to become more soft, as he leans forward to take your hand once more. This time however, he doesn’t let go. “It's Valentine's Day, and we’re both here together. You even said you wouldn’t want to be somewhere else.”

Once again, true.

“Don’t you think that means something?” He pushes a little further, and you finally force your gaze to meet his eyes, which are practically glistening with sincerity.

Taking a deep breath, you decide not to confirm the question, but also not disagree with it either. The safest option.

“How are you even sure we’re compatible in that way?” You ask, voice barely above a whisper. Heart beating a mile per minute, palms clammy in a way they haven’t been in months, you can barely fathom how nervous you are in this moment.

Not a bad nervous. Not terribly nauseous, or a terrified sort of anxious, but for lack of a better term, it’s what you can only describe as butterflies.

And how long has it been since someone has given you those?

Hyunjin leans in a little closer, just a fraction of an inch, but you feel your breath halt sharply. He smiles. “Don’t you want to find out?”

“Yes,” your mind whispers, followed immediately by: “No you don’t, what the fuck?”

It doesn’t take a genius to know which one of those thoughts might hold a little more truth than the other.

“I don't know,” you answer, and after a moment of silence, you sigh. Hyunjin has been awfully honest, perhaps it’s time you try the same. “Ugh, maybe? But isn’t that crazy?”

“See, we’re both crazy,” he says, adding to the rather extensive list he’s created.

You can’t stop the laugh that escapes your lips at this, and his grin grows a little wider before he chuckles along with you. As it dies out, the quiet you are left with is full. Full of compassion, of confession, of the anticipation of what might happen next.

“Here let me propose an idea, and try not to freak out until I’m finished,” he says, waiting to continue until you give him the confirmation of a small nod. He inhales deeply. “Let me kiss you, and if there’s nothing there, you can leave and we can act like this never happened. We’ll just go back to being colleagues and tease each other like we always do, except this time it actually will be lighthearted.”

You open your mouth to respond, but he gently puts a hand up, indicating he’s not quite done yet. “And if there is something there, you’ll let me treat you to coffee after work on Thursday. And at a cafe, not the breakroom.”

Maybe you should say no. He’s a colleague, and one you’ve not so secretly disliked for over a year, at that. Sensibility states it’s not wise to date a coworker, so long as things don’t work out and you’re forced to see them again and again.

But your heart states that it’s Valentine’s Day, and your heart has never been the most sensible of influences. You’ve tossed the thought of relationships and the possibility of butterflies on the backburner for so long, what if you allowed yourself a little fraction of weakness?

After all, a kiss and maybe coffee afterwards isn’t too dangerous a proposition, is it?

Letting your gaze momentarily flicker down to the man’s lips, which remain drawn in that soft smile, you take a deep breath. “Okay,” you whisper, and he nods, although you don’t miss the way his eyes seem to glow a little brighter.

Slowly, he leans forward, so close that you allow your own eyes to flutter shut, the ghost of his breath hot against your face. You wait a moment, shuddering slightly, when you can feel him let out a chuckle.

“Are you sure?” He asks, and it’s blatantly obvious that he’s teasing you.

“You’re the worst,” you reply, although there is no seriousness behind the words. You’re about to reopen your eyes, when he suddenly leans forward fully, closing the remaining distance between the two of you.

The kiss is soft. Chaste, but also not lacking in compassion, as he leans in a little further to deepen it. His hand falls onto one of your own that rests on the desktop, fingers dusting against your knuckles. It’s all very tender, in a way you never expected of Hyunjin.

Not that you’re admitting to ever having imagined what kissing him might be like, of course.

He pulls away for a moment, eyes opening briefly. “Was that alri-”

But you don’t give him a chance to finish, because now that you’ve had a taste, you simply can’t imagine stopping.

“Just, shut up for a second,” you state, before leaning back to connect your lips once again. He allows his hand to trail up your arm with a bit more purpose this time, as if reassured by your confirmation. Settling on your shoulder, he pulls you in closer, the rhythm the two of you begin to settle into slowly escalating. A little more eager, as each kiss becomes more desperate than the next.

His lips taste of the wine you had earlier, a sweet and crisp flavour that you can’t help but internally thank Gahyeon for, as you chase after the high it gives you.

It’s sudden, how his other hand slips to wrap around your waist, pulling you upwards so that the two of you are standing. The chair you were sitting on rolls backwards, not so gracefully knocking into one of the office’s many filing cabinets, but neither of you pays much mind. Instead, Hyunjin takes the liberty of shifting you over, so that your lower back presses up against his office desk.

It’s not until now that you realize how genuinely tall the man is, as both of his hands fall on either side of you to rest on the desktop, closing you in.

“You don’t know how long I’ve been waiting for this,” he whispers into your mouth, and you can’t deny the way your chest warms at the statement, a strange sense of pride. At the same time, however, it is accompanied by surprise.

“Really?” You whisper back, and he nods, hand pulling back the collar of your shirt to reveal your neck and collarbone.

“Are you saying you haven’t thought about it?” He challenges, and your first thought is to immediately say no and deny it, just as you always have. But really, what good would that do you now?

“I have,” you answer honestly, taking in a deep breath as his lips begin to work their way down your jawline, approaching your neck. “It just wasn’t exactly like this.”

You have always thought Hyunjin was attractive, you aren’t blind. With long golden hair, plump lips, and a nice jawline, there is no denying that he’s pleasing to the eye. This of course  didn’t change your inherent dislike towards him, but you suppose it also may have made it… manifest a little differently at times.

After all, hatred is a passionate emotion, and it’s not so difficult for the line between detestment and desire to blur. For those feelings to subconsciously manifest into something more. Something angry, and charged and deliciously wrong.

“Oh, yeah?” He smirks, only stopping for a moment, before continuing his trek downwards, nipping at the skin of your collarbone. “Tell me what it was like then.”

Breath hitching slightly has one of his hands trails down your waist, before resting awfully close to your inner thigh. “Fuck, yeah okay,” you murmer, barely above a whisper.

“We were here,” you breathe, and he hums at this, the curve of his smile pressing against the skin of your neck. “We were just in an argument.”

“Sounds like us,” he notes, moving his hand so that it actually does rest on your inner thigh. “What was the argument about?”

“I… I don’t remember,” you manage, and you don’t even bother attempting to figure it out, as imagining anything outside of the rushing in your ears and the excitement building in your chest seems beyond impossible at the moment.

“Affecting you that much, huh?” He teases, finally removing his mouth from your neck, bringing his head back so that his eyes can meet yours. They glint with mischief, and you find yourself both embarrassed, as well as a tad bothered in more ways than one.

“Shut up,” you murmur weakly, and he simply laughs before opening his mouth, surely to say something else that will affect you more than your liking. You don’t give him the chance however, as you once again connect your lips, letting your own hand wrap along his jaw, firmly pulling him into you.

He easily complies, before taking the initiative to go further, leaning you backwards over the desk. Now this is more similar to what you shamefully imagined, dirtier, far more risky and bold and something you certainly should not be doing in the office.

His computer is conveniently placed to the side, so long as you don’t mind the WENUS booklet that rests below your back - which you obviously don’t - there’s more than enough room as he lays you down, hand trailing downward along the shape of your figure.

Your mind whispers that this might be getting a tad out of hand, but it’s quickly overshadowed by the need coursing through you, that hunger for what might come next, for more. Voice of reason be damned, after all you’ve been listening to it far too much lately, let tonight be your one slip up.

That is, the voice of reason would have been forgotten, had it not taken the shape of a bottle of wine that sits haphazardly at the edge of the desk.

All it takes is for Hyunjin’s elbow to stray a little too far to the side, for the bottle to be tipped over. Unfortunately, it also doesn’t take the liberty of falling off the side of the desk and onto the floor, which would perhaps lead to a small stain on the carpet and nothing more.

No, instead it tips over onto the desk and the bottle cracks open, not shattering completely but rather into a few separate pieces of glass. The sparkling white liquid spreads across the desk top, and subvertly, the computer and keyboard.

It’s almost immediate how the heat of the moment transforms into a blind panic.

“Shit, shit, shit,” Hyunjin mutters, scrambling to grab the broken bottle before more wine can leak out and cause any extra damage.

Meanwhile, you sit yourself upward and off the desk, trying to ignore the fact that your back and shirt are now both soaking wet. Without another word, he disappears from the office, only to return with a stack of napkins you recognize from the lunchroom.

It takes the two of you all of only a few minutes to clean up the mess, the wine easily soaked up by the napkins, the computer and keyboard only having acquired a quick wiping to be fine, at least on the outside.

After a quick boot up by Hyunjin, the computer starts alright, the two of you letting out an equally relieved sigh. Both of your jobs pay fine money, but the thought of paying a couple grand to fix a company computer - not even considering the embarrassment regarding how exactly it got broken - isn’t exactly on your list of work goals.

“Is it okay?” You ask, and Hyunjin nods, giving you a soft smile.

“The computer seems fine,” he replies, before tapping a few random buttons on the keyboard, a frown playing across his lips. “But I think I’m going to need to invest in a new keyboard.”

“Bummer,” you state, which seems like a rather lame thing to say, but frankly it also could have been much worse than just the keyboard. Honestly, the two of you probably deserved a bit worse, so you can’t help but feel lucky.

Hyunjin sighs, standing up from the seat in front of the computer and walking over to stand beside you. Leaning against the desk, this time he is sure to take a glance behind himself to check that there’s nothing he might be in danger of knocking over “Bit of a mood-killer though, huh?” He states, and you snort.

Shifting yourself to stand in front of him, you go to redo his tie. “On the bright side,” you start, glancing up at him, only reveling slightly in the way he watches you intently, as your faces are only a few inches apart. “I think we can add that kind of compatibility to your list.”

“You think so?” He says, tone both a little surprised but happy all the same. It’s endearing, how his eyes light up with relief. “The wine disaster and panic didn’t tarnish the whole thing?”

“It would take a lot more to tarnish that, believe me,” you answer, finishing the knot of his tie before beginning to let go. “But I guess we’ll just have to continue this some other time, over coffee perhaps?”

Because honestly, you’d already mentally agreed to coffee before he even kissed you.

“Of course, I’d love that,” he starts sweetly, before suddenly taking hold of your wrist, grip gentle but firm. He smirks. “But if you want, we could also go to Chan’s office.”

You laugh, assuming the statement to be a joke, but Hyunjin simply raises an eyebrow. A challenge.

Surprisingly - and perhaps a little terribly, as well - you aren’t appalled by the idea. You’re more than willing to continue where you left off, and enacting what would be a little bit of revenge on Chan is almost too enticing.

It’s risky, unprofessional, and undeniably wrong on almost every level, but these are also the things that make it so incredibly tempting.

You hesitate for a moment, a wide grin spreading across your own lips. Tilting your head to the side, you look him up and down, analyzing. “You’re a bit of a freak, aren’t you?”

He chuckles at this, before mimicking you and tilting his own head to this side. “Only if you’re into it.”

And yeah, you’re a little into it.

“Okay,” you say with a smile, tugging lightly on the end of his tie as you make your way towards his office door, pulling him along with you. “Chan’s office it is.”

~~~~

psa: pls don’t fool around with anyone in your boss’ office. thank you <3

but anywho, thanks for reading everyone!! i hope you enjoyed, and if you did, feel free to come chat with me about any thoughts or feelings you may have.

if you want, here are my skz and ateez masterlists for more content. i hope to see you around. :3

[sm-entertain-me]

Second Session (M)

Synopsis: What other activities transpired at the infamous Heartbreak Hotel that fateful night? (The official part two of Heartbreak Hotel! Link to part one here.)

Contains: Hwang Hyunjin x (f) reader, adult language, smut, explicit depictions of unprotected sex, shower sex, thigh slapping, daddy kink, choking, creampie, rabu hoteru!au, nonidol!Hyunjin, rabu hoteru worker!reader, previous client!Hyunjin.

A/N: I would just like to thank you all for your patience and understanding during this stressful time for me. I’ve been having a very bad mental health week and decided to take some time off to relax before focusing my attention back on my works. I would hate to put out work that I felt unhappy with due to me being in the wrong headspace. Again, thank you all for your patience and I hope to continue writing on a regular basis from here on out.

Scalding hot water cascaded slowly over the smooth crevices of your body, the soothing feeling causing you to part your lips to let out a satisfied sigh. Steam began to collect around you to fill the lavish bathroom, hindering your vision ever so slightly while also allowing your sinuses to open fully. After all of the work you had put in today, to say you deserved this shower would be somewhat of a understatement. In fact, you needed this shower. But just as you were enjoying the soft trickling of water slipping down the glass of the walls encasing the larger than necessary shower, you were suddenly reminded that you were still technically working, biting your lip softly as you finally called out, “Hyunjin? Aren’t you coming to join me?”

Ah yes, your sinful little wager you had with someone who had become your favorite client overnight. The handsome man standing outside of the shower had been waiting ever so patiently for you to beckon him into the very welcoming shower, trying his best to take a deep breath before opening the glass door to reveal your naked body to him. Although Hyunjin had already seen you naked merely minutes before, he hadn’t even contemplated just how insatiable you would look with water flowing down your luscious locks all the way down your tempting figure.

Noticing that Hyunjin was taking his sweet time, you allowed the devious smirk to overtake your lips as you stepped over to the starstruck young man, purposely swinging your hips with each languid step. Now standing in front of Hyunjin and allowing the steam from your body to fan across his face, you glanced down and noticed that he was still wearing his towel from earlier. A subtle sigh escaped your lips as you shook your head disapprovingly, slipping your fingers in between the soft fabric of the complimentary hotel towel and Hyunjin’s goose bump ridden hip, pulling the fabric off of his body in a sharp yank. Once you were satisfied with the absence of the towel on Hyunjin’s hips, you offered a playful smirk before pulling him inside the shower with you, “The longer you keep me waiting, the more you’ll have to pay when you lose.”

Your teasing tone seemed to awaken something in Hyunjin, his soft brown orbs hardening into a rich dark black. Instead of Hyunjin allowing you to pull him into the shower completely, he took it upon himself to forcefully push you up against the cool tile along the back wall of the shower. The smirk that was once on your lips quickly changed over to Hyunjin’s, the corner of his lips pointing upwards as he held you against the wall, caging you against the slick surface. Hyunjin studied the shocked expression on your face, slowly leaning in to your left side to lick teasingly at your ear lobe. Due to your prior encounter, Hyunjin knew exactly which places he needed to exploit in order to make you crack. But that was fine for you, you were allowed to crack whereas Hyunjin has to keep himself together for at least five minutes. If not, he’ll experience the most expensive orgasm of his entire life.

While Hyunjin held you firmly against the cold tile, he couldn’t help but reach his hand out to caress your face softly, rubbing the damp skin with his slender thumb before turning his attention to your slightly abused neck. Although he had managed to do a decent amount of work to your neck in your prior encounter, Hyunjin knew he could improve his masterpiece. Holding your gaze momentarily, Hyunjin sent a wink your way before he gripped one of your wrists to pin it beside you, leaning in to capture the skin of your neck between his awaiting lips. You automatically felt Hyunjin’s teeth rake against your neck, moaning out from the sensation as you titled your head to give him better access. You knew this didn’t count as the actual part of the wager, allowing Hyunjin to do whatever he pleased with you in order to get him to his carnal state that you craved so much.

As Hyunin painted your neck with ghastly reds and rich shades of purples, you couldn’t help but allow your restless hand to drop down to where Hunjin had been rutting his hardened cock into your bare cunt. Since you were technically off the clock, that meant that Hyunjin wasn’t bound by your traditional rules, as long as you consented. Continuing to drum up the dominant persona he was forced to squander during his paid excursion with you, Hyunjin’s lips formed a devious smirk against your abused neck while his hand slipped between your bodies to deliver a sharp smack to the inside of your thigh.

Clearly not used to your clients being the dominant one, you let out a sharp gasp, letting your mouth hang open as you stared at Hyunjin with curious eyes. Although your mind was automatically jumping to the offensive, the sharp throb that Hyunjin’s hand brought to your thigh quickly spread inwards to your now throbbing pussy. Hyunjin rolled his eyes at your quizzical look as he opted to massage the skin he just smacked, clicking his tongue together in a disappointed fashion, “Oh don’t seem so surprised, princess. You had to have known daddy was going to punish you for touching too early.” Hyunjin then gave another playful smack to the opposite thigh for good measure, watching your eyes dilate ever so slightly before he quickly closed the gap between your steaming bodies, “Let’s get those five minutes started, shall we?”

Five minutes of carnal. animalistic desires was the time limit that Hyunjin had to last or else he would have to pay the full price of the mindblowing experience the two of you shared before. Let’s just say he would have to be paying a small fortune in order to officially pay off the sum required for your expert services. But Hyunjin seems to have the advantage in this particular situation given that he currently had you pinned against the wall, holding you firmly while angling his hips to have you slide effortlessly down onto his hardened member, beads of precum slipping down his shaft. The second Hyunjin’s cock had sunk all the way inside of your throbbing walls, you knew you were in trouble.

Drops of water slung all over the area of the shower, sounds of skin smacking against skin being amplified due to the close quarters of the shower walls. and you were trying your best to hold on for dear life as Hyunjin pistoned in and out of your from below. Your nails were proving futile in trying to sink into Hyunjin’s shoulders for a proper grip thanks to the water, but Hyunjin accommodated your weak grip by grabbing your ankles and wrap them tightly around his hips to keep you anchored properly. Although you knew Hyunjin did this to keep you in place, you also couldn’t help but notice how Hyunjin’s breathing began to change slightly as if he had preferred the more intimate grip he held you in. Either that or he was already starting to succumb to his desires.

Due to how hard and calculated Hyunjin’s thrusts were, perhaps Hyunjin wasn’t as close to the edge as you had hoped. In fact, Hyunjin’s hips began to snap into your groin at a rate that could only be described as hellish, fueled by your high pitched moans and soft pleas. Every ripple of your pussy sent shockwaves through Hyunjin, him not even bothering to hold back the guttural moans that were reserved only for you. Both of you had the exact same reaction to each other’s moans: desperate for more.

“Daddy... fucking shit... I’m so cl-close,” You admitted in between broken moans, feeling your eyes start to roll back from the euphoria that refused to relent. Hyunjin had managed to adjust his position ever so slightly that the tip of his cock was now kissing your cervix, achieving depths that you weren’t sure were even possible. But you didn’t seem to mind either judging by the way your jaw hung open to let out a barrage of moans while also holding onto Hyunjin for dear life, feeling your back begin to arch against his torso to indicate you were seconds away from orgasmic relief. 

“Cum on my cock princess, I’ll make you feel so fucking good,” Hyunjin grunted, peeling his pillowy soft lips away from your neck so he could see your fucked out features in all of their sinful glory. However, even though you looked completely ravishing with the water flowing through your slightly askew hair and flowing down your flushed face, Hyunjin simply craved more. He didn’t seem to care about the wager anymore, he just wanted to pleasure you in the best ways possible, just as you had done to him. This meant Hyunjin taking his hand that was currently caressing your face and wrapping it gingerly around your throat, feeling your pulse thump wildly against the space between his thumb and forefinger. You were done for.

Deep strokes combined with Hyunjin’s gentle yet still firm grip on your throat caused stars to cloud your vision, your body reacting intensely to the euphoria that pulsed through your body mercilessly by throwing you into your orgasm. Hyunjin’s name was the only word you seemed to know as you lost yourself completely, crying out for the attractive male that was still pounding into your heat from below. “Oh god, yes!” You cried out in pure ecstasy as you arched your back, your torso flat against Hyunjin’s as you began to whimper from the overstimulation that began to set in.

“Oh... Oh fuck,” Hyunjin groaned out as you felt his grip on your throat begin to loosen, his hips stilling underneath you to indicate he couldn’t hold on any longer. No matter how hard he tried to get himself to hold out for the maximum amount of time, he couldn’t fight the insatiable feeling of your walls gripping his thick cock tighter and tighter with each passing second. Within seconds of him speaking, you were met with the familiar feeling of Hyunjin’s cum filling you to the brim, both of you moaning out in unison from the sensation.

Neither of you were in any position to move, Hyunjin choosing to hold you in his embrace while allowing the water to flow down each of your still writhing bodies. The water felt warm and inviting, forcing you to have to fight off the episode of sleep that was waiting patiently. It also didn’t help that Hyunjin had his head resting in the crook of your neck, the rhythm of his breathing acting as a soft lullaby. But just as you were about to allow your eyes to close, Hyunjin began to stir in front of you, pulling his head out of your neck and looking into your eyes through his hooded ones, “I think I owe you some money.”

Luckily clean up was pretty easy for the both of you, given the location in which you two decided to complete your activities. Unfortunately for Hyunjin, he had to pay up. But what was odd is that you told Hyunjin you would meet him down there, earning a confused look from your client. Still, he did as you told and waited patiently for you in the lobby before going to the front desk to work out the finances. As you entered the lobby, you motioned for Hyunjin to join you at the desk while you talked with your favorite desk worker Seungmin.

“Ah Y/N what a lovely surprise, what do I owe the pleasure?” Seungmin asked in a chipper tone, his eyes glancing from you over to Hyunjin who was standing rather nervously behind you. It was a complete 180 from the person that was rearranging your guts in the shower minutes ago, but you didn’t really seem to mind. As long as Hyunjin was dominant where it mattered most, you didn’t really seem to care how he acted. 

You offered your coworker a kind smile as you leaned over the desk, purposely showing off your cleavage to the younger male to sweeten the deal, “Is there any way we can give Hyunjin-ssi a discount for his phenomenal performance? I personally believe no one who can match my elite level of service deserves to pay full price. It’s simply not fair.”

Seungmin souldn’t help but chuckle at your reasoning, trying his best to hide his mischievous grin as he relayed to the two of you, “That good, huh? Congratulations Hyunjin-ssi, you’re the first client to have Y/N personally come down and request a discount for based on your performance. You must’ve really done a number on her. Shall I make this a recurring transaction then?”

“Absolutely.”

[butterflyyeo]

my whole world

pairing — hyunjin x reader

genre — fluff

tw — none

wc — 723

——————————————

it was friday night and you’d been studying all day. you felt as though your head would explode if you continued to write any more flash cards or do any more practice tests. so you closed all your textbooks and put away your pens.

you cooked up some dinner and sighed softly, knowing hyunjin wouldn’t be home in time to share it with you. he was always busy with something, whether it vocal lessons or dance practice. recently, he’d been getting home later and later each night. yes, you understood its his job and what he loved doing, but you couldn’t help missing him every now and then.

as you got into bed, you rolled around a few times trying to get comfortable, though you just couldn’t. the bed felt empty. so you threw on some sweats instead of pyjamas and got into the car, heading over to hyunjin’s company building. along the way, you made sure to pick up some take out for him, making sure he would be fed.

after hearing a knock on his practice room door, hyunjin half expected it to be minho coming to run through some choreography. however, he was pleasantly surprised when he opened the door to see you smiling up at him, holding a bag of take out.

“what are you doing here, baby?” he asked, engulfing you in the warmest hug.

you chuckled into his chest, “brining you dinner.”

he led you into the center of the room where the two of you took a seat on the floor. you opened the containers that contained steamy hot food and picked some up with a pair of chopsticks. you extended your arm towards hyunjin’s mouth and in response his face scrunched up.

“i’m not letting you feed me.” he shook his head with a laugh.

you pouted before humming out, “please.”

there was no way he could resist the adorable pleading look that you were giving him. “fine.” he sighed, “but just this once.”

hyunjin reluctantly opened his mouth and you placed some food inside. you smiled, watching as he happily chewed, despite not wanting to be fed by you. the two of you spent the next ten minutes enjoying each other’s company, with you continuing to put food into his mouth and him rolling his eyes playfully every now and then.

after he finished eating, hyunjin picked up all the rubbish and took it to the bin. before he sat back down he connected his phone to the speakers in the room, playing some quiet music. he held his hands out, motioning for you to hold them. he pulled you up and twirled you around a few times. the two of you danced around jokingly for a while, you felt foolish knowing how amazing your boyfriend actually was at dancing.

he pulled you close, so your back was flush against his chest and his arms were wrapped tightly around your torso. he looked at you through the reflection of the mirror in the practice room.

“what would i do without you?” he whispered, trailing gentle kisses along your neck. “you’re my everything, my whole world.” he said, lips brushing against your ear.

“don’t be silly, hyunjin.” you blushed, turning away at his sudden emotion.

“i’m being serious, i love you so much. i’m sorry i can’t be with you more often.” he frowned, and despite the dimly lit room, you could see tears glistening in his eyes.

“baby?” you turned in his arms to face him completely. “don’t cry its not your fault. this is your job, what you love doing. i understand that you’re gonna be busy.” you wiped at a few stray tears falling down his cheeks before placing a delicate kiss on his lips. “i love you, hyunjin.”

he pouted slightly, cupping your face lightly in his hands, “i love you the most.”

before heading home, hyunjin showed you some choreography he’d been working on. he’d been working hard, but he looked amazing and you knew he deserved every bit of praise in the entire world. you hoped he knew that.

that night, he cuddled up next to you in bed and held you so tightly. he felt so grateful and underserving of someone as loving as you were. he sincerely meant it when he said you were his everything, his whole world.

[amethystwrytes]

Safe. (Part Six)

Pairing: Hwang Hyunjin X Fem. Reader X Lee Minho

Summary: A broke ER Nurse offers up her services to a large crime organization in exchange for much higher pay and benefits that are unconventional, but lucrative. The life proves to be questionable at best, and downright isolating at worst which leaves her feeling unsure, unstable and dangerous. 

Warnings: Explicit language. Explicit depictions of sex (some chapters will be more explicit than others sexually). Violence. Blood. Trauma injuries. (Organized) Crime. Emotional manipulation. Discussion of murder and physical assault. Medical inaccuracy galore. Smoking. Past addiction. Legal inaccuracies. 18+ Only MDNI

Chapter WC: 8k

AN: If I were to debate any more over this I just wouldn’t ever post it so F it, it’s out there and now I can’t take it back haha

~ PART SIX ~ (Series M. List Here)

“Is something bothering you lately?”

It’s seven in the morning and you’re tangled up with Minho in bed. After days of being apart, you were relieved to have him next to you. Though Hyunjin was more than able to keep you company (on nearly every surface in the house, no less). But now, Hyunjin is working, or rather has been working. Doing weapons and ammunition deliveries and collection always ends up being a graveyard shift activity, the dark of night used as a cloak to do bad things with bad men. Though you don’t quite understand why they think it’s beneficial, police work at night too, and you often think that doing these weapons deals would be more effective mid-afternoon in the plain of day where no one would expect an arms deal to be taking place, but what do you know? 

“What do you mean?” Minho asks, setting his phone down on the side table and rolling over into you. 

“You’ve been so restless lately, I barely see you sleep, it’s been quiet I thought, since all that happened with Taehyung. Are you uncomfortable sleeping here? We could stay in your apartment,” you suggest, holding his head into your chest, sleepily stroking his hair. 

“My apartment is in the city, loud and lit up 24/7. It’s barely big enough for me, stuffed with boxes and boxes of shit I don’t need, and I can count on my fingers how many times I’ve actually slept there and not just at my office. It’s much better here with you,” he explains. 

“Then why so restless and fidgety?” you wonder. 

“It’s like you said baby, it’s been quiet since the Casino fiasco with Kim, in fact it’s been too quiet. We murdered one of the men who attacked you and I expected that to ignite a whole blood bath, and yet nothing, nothing has happened,” he says, his hand sliding under your nightdress and fanning out over your tummy, tracing gentle circles all over. 

You suppose he’s right. If you had one of those “There’s Been [this many] Days Without an Incident” signs, you could put double digits in the number slots. You haven’t even had to nurse anyone back to health lately. Jisung tripped a few weeks ago walking down the stairs outside his apartment and rolled his ankle. Seungmin got into a bar fight over a girl he’d just met - you cleaned up his face but he didn’t even need stitches. Other than that it had been unusually quiet in your house. 

“Maybe nothing will happen, maybe Kim doesn’t care that you killed the guy,” you say, though even you have to admit it makes zero sense. 

“Mmm,” Minho shakes his head across your chest, “That’s not how it works Love, not by a longshot.” 

“What can you do?” you wonder. 

He braces himself over you with one of his arms and kisses your lips, “All I can do is wait for his next move. If I send my guys after him then all I’m doing is risking their lives for something I’m not even sure of, so I wait, and waiting is sometimes excruciating,” his fingers slide up to one of your breasts and play at your nipple, stiffening the bud of nerves and sending signals between your legs, your lips part and a relaxed breath escapes, “In the meantime, I quite enjoy killing time with you,” he grins. 

He moves on top of you, slotting himself between your legs, you feel his clothed erection press against your cunt as he ruts against you, his mouth exploring your neck, jawline, and lips. 

“Flip,” he growls, his hands heavy and pressing against your hips. You flip onto your stomach, lifting your ass off the bed, pressing yourself against his aching length, you know exactly what he wants. You hear him shuffling, shoving his sleep shorts down and your night dress up your back. You feel him line himself up with you, dragging the head of his cock through your slick. 

You brace yourself, digging your fingers around the thick comforter as he slams into you. You let out a gasp at the sudden roughness, but just as quickly your gasps turn to heady moans, wordlessly pleading for more, for harder thrusts. Minho gives them to you, his fingers impossibly tight around your hips, pushing and pulling himself in and out. 

“Minho…” you say his name, barely a whisper but also a warning. Your fingers move between your legs, rubbing yourself in soft circles so your orgasm explodes around him. He slows his thrusts, allowing your spasming cunt to milk his own high. 

He finally collapses back down on the bed next to you, chest rising and falling heavily as his breath returns to normal. 

“Can I ask a favor?” you open one eye and stare at him. 

“Anything.” 

“I want to learn how to shoot,” you say and he looks at you with a raised brow, “a gun, that is.” 

“Well yes,” he chuckles, “I didn’t think you meant a bow and arrow. I’m just a little surprised I suppose, but I think that’s a good idea,” he nods. 

“Something small, nothing that will knock me off my feet or send me reeling back,” you continue. 

“Mm,” he thinks, “I’ve got a .22 at the office that would be perfect for you. I have a meeting with Hyunjin and Felix this morning, to see how the evening collections went. I’ll send Hyunjin over with the gun after, once he gets some rest he can take you to the range, maybe tomorrow, that sound good?” 

“Mmhmm,” you yawn, your morning excursions leaving you sleepy again. 

“Go back to sleep baby,” he leans over and kisses you, “I’m going to get dressed, Changbin will be here until Hyunjin arrives later, okay?” 

“Okay,” you whisper, you feel him shift and scoot to the edge of the bed. Maybe it’s because you’re still half asleep, maybe it’s because he fucked you so good, but without really thinking you call to him, “Minho?” 

“Hm?” 

“I love you.” 

It doesn’t surprise nor bother you that he stays quiet as he rises out of the bed and makes his way to the bathroom, you don’t really care if he feels the same or not, don’t really care that he doesn’t seem to want to comment on your confession. At the moment you just sink back into the mattress, letting the warmth of the blankets overtake you and drift off again. 

🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️

“Alright Doll,” Hyunjin stands behind you at the gun range, Changbin and Seungmin have tagged along, evidently this is one of their favorite pastimes. “What you want to do above anything else is relax.” 

You snort, “You hear how absurd that sounds, right? Nothing says relaxation quite like being in a situation where I need a loud, dangerous gun.” 

“I meant you need to relax during practice,” he smirks, “If you relax while you’re practicing and get used to hitting your target, it won’t matter what kind of situation you’re in when you need it. You’ll be used to it.” 

“Okay, okay,” you grab the gun and aim at the target, closing one eye and trying to line the barrel up with the big black circle on your target dummy. 

“Why are you closing one eye?” Changbin asks, the three men looking at you puzzled. 

“I…don’t know? That’s how they do it in movies?” you say sheepishly. 

“If you close one eye you’re only going to see half as well, that’s dumb,” Seungmin says. 

“Fine, okay, both eyes open, got it,” you look forward again, your eyes trying to line up the little nub thingie with the target. 

“You’re relying too much on the front sight,” Hyunjin chuckles, “Your eyes look crossed.” 

Changbin and Seungmin giggle and you huff in frustration. 

“You know what I think would be helpful? If I actually got to shoot the damned thing. Let’s start there and then you can give me your critiques, okay?” 

Without giving them an opportunity to answer, you look back, close one eye, try to line the sight up with your target and pull the trigger…and you can’t even see where your bullet went. 

“Alright, so let’s start with number one: you weren’t relaxed whatsoever. Number two: you closed your eye again, and number three: you weren’t even focusing on the target, you were too busy relying on your sight, which is useless if you’re not looking at the target.” 

“Try again,” Changbin smiles enthusiastically. 

Seungmin cocks his gun and points it at the target then unloads several rounds, you look at the end of the range and see he’s hit the dummy multiple times in the head and center of the chest. All fatal wounds. He looks at you smugly and winks. 

You take a deep breath and turn your body towards the target again, picking up your gun and aiming. This time you take a deep breath, you keep both eyes open and pull the trigger. And again, your bullet has flown off into God knows what dimension. 

You look at Hyunjin in frustration and he cackles. 

“Sweetheart you’ve only shot it twice, don’t look so sour. That stance was much better by the way,” he stands behind you again, his hand gently bringing your arm back up to aim at the target. “Keep your other hand under the grip, to keep it steady, okay?” his lips are a little too close to your ear, and you feel his warm breath against your neck. 

“Okay…” you whisper back. Suddenly aware of the warmth. You side eye Changbin and Seungmin, who seem to be having a totally separate conversation as they clean their other guns. 

“Just like sports, you want your body to be facing the target at first, it takes a lot of practice and skill to be able to hit something that you’re not facing head on,” he puts his hands on your hips and lines it up with the target down the range. 

“Now, take a deep breath…just like that…and look at what you want to hit,” he says. You nod and stare at the big black circle in the center of the dummies chest. “Pull the trigger slow and steady while you exhale.” 

You do as he says, you repeat the steps a couple times actually, then finally pull the trigger slowly. 

You don’t hit the circle, but you can see the bullet hole has hit the lower right hip area of the dummy. You’re on the board, so to speak. 

“Look at that,” he whispers in your ear, his hand giving your hip a seductive squeeze, “that’ll do some damn good damage. Good job baby.” 

“Thanks,” you breathe, staring at his lips, “I need to go to the restroom, excuse me,” you say, your hidden fingers dancing across the zipper of Hyunjins pants. He bites his lip and looks down at you wantingly. 

You set the weapon down and dust your hands off on the side of your jeans, then walk out of the shooting range, down the narrow corridor to the rest rooms. You stand in front of the sink, looking at yourself in the mirror, wondering if Hyunjin picked up on your very telepathic message. You’ve got no Earthly idea where this horniness came from, if maybe shooting a weapon is evidently a turn on for you, or if it was the way he was so close, pressed against you, teaching you - either way, you need him, and you need him now. 

You wash your hands, straighten out your hair and just stare at yourself some more. You’re about to give up - it would probably be better to wait until you get home anyway - when the door to the bathroom swings open and Hyunjin barrels in, locking it behind himself. 

“Naughty little girl,” he growls before pressing his lips to yours, immediately pushing you against the sinks, lifting you up to set you on the questionable countertop. “Getting me fucking turned on,” he continues, his mouth trailing down your neck. 

“Fuck me, please,” you whisper. 

“Really?” he looks around, “Here?” 

“Yes,” you start undoing his pants. 

“Shit,” he moans when your hand wraps around his throbbing length. “Yeah, okay, okay, just…here sit on this,” he drags you off the counter and removes his shirt, spreading it over the surface. 

You shimmy out of your jeans and hop back up, pulling him back in and capturing his mouth with yours. 

“God you are dripping wet,” he groans, teasing you with his cock, “Feels so fucking good.” 

“Please,” you beg, your nails digging into his skin. 

He pushes into you and you both gasp. 

“Fuck!” you cry out and he chuckles against you. 

“Shhh, you’ll get us in trouble,” he whispers, his hands holding the sides of your thighs to keep you steady. 

“Feels so good,” you whimper, quietly, into his ear. 

“You’re killing me today…fuck…”

“Shit…like that…oh my god…”

“Hey,” Hyunjin grabs your chin and forces your gaze to his while he continues fucking into you deep and heavy, “I love you, so fucking much.” 

“I love you too,” you pant, “I love you too.” 

You wrap your arms around his neck and press your lips against his, your cries getting lost in his mouth while you cum for him. 

He frowns at his shirt as he shrugs it back on, “A shooting range bathroom is not as romantic as your book, but I hope I got the point across, and I meant it, by the way, I love you.” 

“It was authentically us, and I meant it too,” you squeeze his hand. 

“I do not accept this dingy ass bathroom is authentically us, I am an artist god dammit,” he teases and you laugh. 

A knock on the door startles both of you and you scrunch your nose as Seungmin hollers, “If you guys are done fucking can we go get some lunch? I’m starving!” 

“Everyone knows, don’t they?” you smile at Hyunjin. 

“Yeah, you’d think it would be a cone of silence but these mother fuckers are nothing but catty gossips…and I suck at keeping my feelings for you hidden,” he says. 

“Good.” 

🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️

Mornings that you get to spend with both Hyunjin and Minho are your favorite. They typically follow a steamy night of unimaginable pleasure, for one, but you also enjoy the peaceful safety you feel when you’re all sitting at the table drinking coffee and chit chatting. It’s comfortable, much more comfortable than you ever imagined it would be. You know that Minho is still struggling with it to some extent, struggling with the relationship. He never commented on your profession of love for him, never brought it up again. It’s confusing, since he never seems to have a problem when all three of you are piled in your bed, limbs tangled, lips everywhere. He’s more than happy then, and more than happy when you’re alone with him. He also doesn’t seem to mind the morning banter over coffee, even now as you watch him talk shop with Hyunjin, a pleasant expression on his face, it all seems fine. 

Yet there are these moments sprinkled into the mix where you can feel his hesitation, feel the withdraw. You don’t feel it with Hyunjin, he’s all in, all the time. Happy as a lark as he sits on the opposite side of the table, sketching something in his notebook, laughing about something that happened on a collection run with Jeongin. You’ve noticed his sketches include a lot more Minho lately, and the expression he draws on him isn’t as dark and dangerous as it once was. 

You decide that in this moment it doesn’t matter, eventually you will have to speak on it, eventually you will have to get Minho to dredge up his feelings. Not right now though. Right now you’re going to drink your coffee and laugh with them and watch Hyunjin draw, and hold Minhos hand under the table. Right now you’re going to enjoy this moment. 

Because unbeknownst to any of the people sitting at the table, the calm before the storm is about to be over. 

It starts with Minho’s phone ringing. He puts it on speaker so he can set the device down and still hold your hand and sip his coffee. 

“You’re on speaker,” he indicates to the caller. 

“Boss,” it’s Changbin, he’s breathless, and sounds as scared as he did the night Hyunjin was stabbed. “We’ve got a problem.” 

Minho lets go of your hand and Hyunjin sets his sketchbook on the table, a serious look on his face as his eyes meet Minhos. 

“How big of a problem?” 

“A really big fucking problem,” Changbin answers. 

Minho knits his eyes closed, “Did we lose anyone?” 

Your very breath leaves your lungs and you could hear a pin drop from two houses down. You try to remain calm as the faces of the men you’ve come to care about flash in your head. You have to force yourself to stop asking if you’ll have to say goodbye to one of them, to more than one…

“No, nobody’s dead,” Changbin pants into the speaker, and the three of you let go of the breaths you’ve been holding, “but Boss…they blew up the fucking warehouse. Jisung and I pulled up after we heard the explosion, Jisung ran in like a fucking idiot - I guess to be sure no one was in there - he burnt his hands and I have Chris driving him to ___ right now but he said it’s all gone, the guns, the ammunition, all of it,” Changbin explains. 

Hyunjins eyes widen, but Minhos expression distorts into such a dangerous anger that it petrifies you. It’s only when his fist comes down hard on the table that you move, running towards the stairs to get dressed and ready to treat whatever burns Jisung has. 

“That’s not all,” Changbin says and you pause.

“What else?” 

“I’m a safe distance away at the moment, but every fucking emergency vehicle in a 100 mile radius is there. Local, federal…every type of investigator you can think of or imagine is over there snooping around what’s left of the building.” 

“God Dammit!” Minho yells so loud it shakes the china in the cabinets. He picks up his coffee mug and throws it with brutal force across the room and it shatters against the wall, leaving a hole in its wake.  

“Get the fuck out of there and meet me here at the safehouse, if you smell like fire go shower first and destroy the clothes you’re wearing so no one can link you to the area. I’m calling my lawyer.” 

Minho disconnects the call and slams the phone down on the table. 

“FUCK.” 

You try to stop your body from shaking and continue upstairs to get dressed. 

There’s Been Zero Days Without an Incident. 

🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️

Minho’s lawyer is a sharp dressed man with thick black glasses named Kim Namjoon. You watch him sip his coffee, a fresh batch you made once you and Hyunjin cleaned up the broken mess from the cup Minho threw against the wall. 

Jisung sits in a chair in front of you as you apply some antibiotic cream to his burns. Nothing too damaging, but his palms will be tender for a week or so, you warn him. 

“As much as I love watching you enjoy your coffee, I’ve got a smoked warehouse and every investigator about to descend on my front door, so let’s just get to it Kim, how fucked am I?” Minho asks after the silence becomes too loud. “Am I looking at prison time?” 

Your hands freeze over Jisungs, “Ouch,” he hisses and you realize you’ve squeezed too hard and look at him apologetically. 

“Actually,” Namjoon sets his mug down, “the silver lining here is that whoever blew your shit up cleared you out of your illegalities. Meaning that as investigators comb through your warehouse, and trust me they are, they aren’t finding anything incriminating. Old slot machines and Casino junk, nothing that can’t be explained since you do in fact own a Casino. Kim Taehyung did you a favor without realizing by stealing the weapons.” 

“Well aren’t I the lucky one? I’ll have to send him a fucking fruit basket then,” Minho seethes. 

“Do whatever you need to do, but we can work with arson and keep the investigators out of your ass as long as the guns are gone, I know that fucks up your other business,” Namjoon raises his brow, “but you know I can’t help you with that.” 

“Yes, well, when I’m dead because I’ve got a target on my back - since six fucking organizations aren’t getting their ammunition and weapons from me on time - you’ll be down a shit ton of money without that cushy retainer I keep you with.” 

“Stop,” Jisung whines and you realize you’ve squeezed his hands again. 

“Sorry,” you hiss, and start bandaging his hands. 

You watch as Minho paces the sitting area, his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose. 

“We’ve got to get those fucking guns back,” he growls. 

Namjoon interjects, “I can’t be a part of this conversation, but I’ll tell you this, the District Attorney wants your head on a silver platter. You may not officially be charged with anything Lee, but it’s no secret in this city that you’re more than just a Casino owner. So I suggest laying low until this arson investigation is over, they’re going to be on you 24/7, regardless of whether or not they find shit at the warehouse,” Namjoon warns. 

“Do we have anyone in that office?” Minho asks. 

Namjoon shrugs, a smug smile on his face, “Not officially, but I have it on good authority the DA himself gets his dick sucked by a sweet little twenty-something who teaches tennis at the country club he tells his wife he’s golfing at every weekend.” 

Minho chuckles, “Well, hold that dick sucking thing over his head like your life depends on it in exchange for not serving my head on a platter, if we’re lucky maybe Kim Taeyhyung hasn’t got to him first.” 

“Will do, but it does pose a risk, we could just piss him off and he’ll try to work you harder,” he explains. 

Minho shakes his head, “I don’t have anything to lose at this point,” he says, but you don’t miss the way his eyes flick over to you momentarily, “I can’t lay low when I’ve got three quarters of a million dollars in weapons missing.” You’re not sure if he’s explaining himself to Namjoon or you. 

“Alright then,” Namjoon stands and sees himself toward the door, “I’ll play a little dirty for the moment and keep you posted on the investigation. Good luck with that target-on-your-back shit.” 

“Thanks,” Minho deadpans and locks the door. 

Everyone from Christopher to Jeongin sits around the room waiting for Minhos instruction. You busy yourself by cleaning up first aid supplies in the background, totally unsure of where you should be or what you should be doing. Judging by how quiet the rest of them are, you definitely know you shouldn’t be talking. 

“We’ve got to steal those guns back,” Minho repeats himself. 

“It’s a suicide mission,” Hyunjin says with a sigh, folding his arms, “That’s exactly what he wants us to do and he’ll be waiting to take us out.” 

“Yeah? Well what about all the organizations who have already paid for their weapons and ammo this quarter? We might be able to talk some of them into waiting, but Min and Jung are ruthless sons of bitches who will kill us all for not delivering what we already collected on,” Seungmin argues. 

“Now hold up,” Changbin interjects, “We have never lagged on business with them, not even when-” Changbin stops and looks at Minho and you know, not even when Minho was mourning his wife, but he doesn’t say that, “Not even when we’ve been down on our luck. So why would they not be understanding this one time?” 

“Sorry, are you new here?” Seungmin laughs darkly, “You think sending them a ‘Thank you so much for your business, unfortunately we’ve hit a snag’ note is going to matter to them? Why don’t you spray it with your perfume before you send it by doves-”

“Enough!” Minho thunders and the arguing comes to an abrupt halt. “None of you are wrong, there are no options that don’t pose a risk, I don’t want to do this in a way that gets anyone killed.” 

“How much would it cost to just go back to the source, to Jiyong? Ask him for a new supply of weapons?” Hyunjin asks. 

“On such short notice?” Minho laughs, “Millions. Plus we’d be on our own smuggling them in, which I’m sure would make our friends at the DA’s office happy since they’ll be watching us so closely - all of us in prison for life? No amount of blackmail could stop the DA from bagging such a big break, especially over something like dick sucking, every politician in this city is getting their dick sucked by someone who shouldn’t be sucking it,” he sighs, “But even if we could find a way to do that, Jiyong is a loose fucking cannon as it is and I don’t trust him as far as I can throw him, the man is psychotic. He may fuck us over just to watch us go down, even if it means he’s out millions of dollars, he doesn’t give a shit,” Minho drags his hand down his face. 

“We have to steal them back from Taehyung,” Seungmin mutters from the corner. 

Hyunjin sucks his teeth, “If we do that, at least one of us will die doing it,” he says. 

“So we die stealing the guns back, or we die for not delivering the weapons, or we go to prison smuggling replacement weapons in,” Felix outlines, “Is that where we’re at?” 

“We vote then,” Minho stands, “We vote, because Felix is right, your lives are all on the line here, there’s not a single option we have that doesn’t end in potential death or prison. However, Jiyong isn’t an option, we just can’t trust him in a situation that’s already fucked to begin with. So, what’ll it be boys? Steal the guns back and take out as many of Taehyungs fuckers as we can, or plea for mercy from our clients and hope they’ll be gracious and not kill us where we stand?” 

“Steal them back,” Seungmin raises his hand, followed by Jeongin, Jisung, Felix, Christopher and reluctantly, Changbin. 

Minho looks sympathetically at Hyunjin who sighs, nods, then raises his hand, “Steal them back then, we don’t plead for a goddamn thing.” 

Minho smiles, “Then let’s go to work.” 

The small group disperses momentarily, probably so they can take a moment to digest the situation, something you’ve been trying to do all day to no avail. 

Minho walks over to you, “Well, I think we can agree that your term to be trusted has been met,” he laughs softly, but for whatever reason you find that his words have struck some deep emotional string and your eyes blur with hot tears. 

“Hey, what’s wrong?” he puts his hand on the small of your back and guides you towards the spare room you use for your medical supply storage. Hyunjin locks eyes with you and sees the tears, he shuffles over to join the two of you. 

“What’s going on?” he asks. 

“I’m trying to figure that out myself,” Minho replies, rubbing your shoulders. 

You don’t really know why you’re crying so hard, but at this point you’re audibly sobbing. 

“Babe?” Hyunjin tilts your face up. 

“I just…I don’t want anyone to get hurt…” you admit. “I’m sorry,” you gasp between sobs, “I don’t know why I’m crying so hard, it’s not like I don’t know what happens out there…” 

“It’s alright Love,” Minho pulls you into him, which for some reason only incites more tears, “this was the first time you’ve really heard us talk about things, the first time you’ve really been able to understand how deep in this we are, so it’s not shocking that it hit you hard, the reality.” 

You nod, trying to compose yourself. You take several deep breaths. What the Hell is your problem? Are you truly shocked to know that these men risk their lives? As if you’ve not had them bloodied, shot and stabbed on your kitchen table? 

You seem to get past the hiccuping sobs and right yourself, “Sorry,” you sigh, “I’m just worried about you, all of you. How will you do this? How can I help?” 

Hyunjin smooths your hair and kisses your forehead, “The best way for you to help is to be ready for anything medically speaking, making sure you have everything you need for any possible situation, that’s how you help baby.”

You nod, and look around the room, “I’ll take inventory, make a list of the things I can’t get at the pharmacy, Christopher and I can run out later this week to stock up on trauma supplies.” 

Hyunjin kisses you gently and squeezes your hand, “I’m going to go start strategy talk, our next deliveries for the quarter are due in just under a month, that’s not a lot of time.” 

You and Minho watch as Hyunjin leaves the room. 

“He really is the best I’ve got,” Minho sighs. 

“But you don’t like the situationship we’ve got going, do you?” you ask, which comes as a surprise to you. This isn’t the best time to be talking about relationships, not with everything that just transpired, and yet it fell out of your mouth anyway. 

“What are you talking about?” Minho asks, looking genuinely confused. 

Fine, you guess now is the time, “There are moments, not often but enough that I notice, where you get so quiet, where you feel so distant. I assume that’s because you’d rather it just be you and I, just the two of us together.” 

“I suppose that would make things simpler,” he says, “and it’s true that the moment you said you had feelings for both of us it hit me hard, it was a blow to my pride, but then your face flashed in my head, how you looked that day that I threatened you, how you had just asked me not to give you a reason to be scared of me and I realized that I love you, ___, and I love you in whatever way that comes as.” 

You smile, “You love me, huh?” 

“Yes,” he pulls you into him and kisses your cheeks and nose, “I love you, it’s not something I take lightly and it’s hard for me to say the words because now it’s real, now you know, and now I can actually lose you and if I do I think I might lose myself too.” 

“You won’t lose me,” you whisper. 

“Mm,” he nods, “Just promise me you’ll always be careful, always keep an eye over your shoulder.” 

“I promise.” 

“I need to go back to them,” he gestures towards the door and pulls away. 

“That still doesn’t explain the way you get so quiet sometimes, so contemplative, like you’re questioning it,” you call out to him. 

“I’m not questioning our arrangement Love,” he answers. 

“Then what?” 

He looks toward the sitting area, then back at you, “I guess I just didn’t expect to start caring about him in a different way, that one took me off guard, and yes it does pull me out of the moment sometimes thinking about it.” 

You nod with a smile, “I see.” 

“Yes, so don’t worry baby, okay? I’m just getting used to this new part of me.”

“Okay.” 

🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️

“So that’s the thread for the stitch kit, the gauze, the wound care kit, I’d like to get an extra pair of clamps and some sort of disinfectant, iodine if they have it but I suppose alcohol will do if they don’t,” you tell Christopher, tossing a few extra things in the basket. 

“I dropped your medication list off with our guy, I’ll know what he can get us and what he can’t by the end of the day,” he shares. 

“Miss ___?” a voice calls your name and you turn towards it. A man in a cheap suit smiles as he walks up to you in the aisle. 

“Don’t say anything,” Chris mutters under his breath before distancing himself from you. 

“You are Miss ___, are you not?” the man produces a photo on his phone of you and Minho, it’s from the night at the Casino. 

“I suppose I am,” you shrug, plastering a casual smile on your face. You can feel your pores opening from the impending sweat and your heart begins to race. 

“You’re familiar with Lee Minho, the man in the picture?” 

“I know who he is, obviously,” you look at the photo, unable to deny that it’s you, “and you know who I am it seems, but I didn’t catch your name?” 

“Beg your pardon ma’am, my name is Jeon Jungkook, I’m the lead Detective on an arson case we’re working at a warehouse Mr. Lee owns,” he smiles and shows you his badge. 

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. 

“Oh, yes, I think I heard something on the news about an explosion outside the city yesterday morning, it was Mr. Lees, you said?” you try to feign surprise but this Jeon guy doesn’t look amused. 

“It was, and I was hoping maybe you’d be willing to come into the station sometime to answer some questions about the, uh, possessions Mr. Lee seems to have lost in the fire,” he grins smugly. 

“Well I’m not sure why you’d think I’d know about anything he lost. That seems like a conversation to have with him, or perhaps the insurance company,” you say. 

“The possessions I’m speaking of aren’t ones that are likely covered by insurance ma’am, and I bet you know that,” he replies. 

You shake your head, “Then you’d lose your bet, Detective, because I have no idea what you’re talking about.” 

“Right, I see,” he sighs, disappointed, then digs in his back pocket and leans in closer, “Here’s my card, if you decide you’re done protecting the bad guys then give me a call,” he looks over your shoulder, “Don’t think I don’t see you Bang, be sure to be a good lap dog and carry Miss ___’s medical supplies to her car for her,” he looks at you, “wouldn’t want you to forget anything then not be able to patch up Lee’s boys,” he winks then walks off. 

He knows. He knows who you are and what you do. He knows everything. Or maybe he doesn’t but obviously he suspects or he wouldn’t have said any of that. 

“Hey, are you good? You look pale as fuck,” Christopher asks but you don’t answer him, suddenly you’re stomach is churning, acid and bile and the iced coffee you drank on the way here bubbling and lurching up, “Hey, ___?” 

“I’ve got to get out of here,” you rasp, no matter how deeply you breathe it feels like you’re not getting enough air, “I need to get out, get me the fuck out of here!” you yelp.

Chris nods and sets the basket on a shelf, “Okay, okay, come on,” he ushers you toward the parking lot. 

It’s no use, even though the breeze is cool and soothes your skin, your stomach still twists and the nausea is too much, you brace one hand on the side of the car and bend over, vomiting all over the parking space, your shoes, and the rear tire of the car parked next to Chris’s. 

“Fuck…” Chris gags, he opens the door and leans in, plucking left over restaurant napkins from his center console and handing them to you. 

“Thanks,” you say hoarsely, wiping your mouth off, then bending over to wipe your shoes. You walk over to a nearby garbage bin and toss the napkins in. You feel better after puking your guts out and finally take a breath.

Chris holds the passenger door open for you, “Well, good thing you didn’t overreact or lose your cool or something,” he laughs and so do you. “Do you want me to go back in and buy all the shit we came here for?” 

“Yes,” you sigh, resting your head on the seat, “Please. Can you get me a lemonade or something as well?” 

“Yeah, be right back.” 

“Thank you Chris, and, I know we’ll have to tell Minho about the detective but for the love of God can you please keep your mouth closed about me having a nervous puke session after? He already worries too much about me. If he thinks I’m going to barf every time I leave the house then I’ll be trapped like a rat.” 

“I swear.” 

🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️

“Like the lawyer said baby, investigators are going to be watching, but they don’t have jack shit on us, I’ve spent my entire career ensuring that anything they have is circumstantial at best, completely inadmissible, you are fine,” Minho soothes. 

“I’ve never been on that side of things before,” you say softly, “I’ve never really been on any side of the law, I guess, but being the one approached, being asked questions - God that was awful.” 

Hyunjins hand grazes over your hip, “They’ve got nothing on you baby,” he kisses your bare shoulder. “Don’t let it bother you. Don’t let him get to you.” 

“He knew exactly what I do for you, he said it plainly,” you point out. 

“So he knows you’re a nurse and made an educated guess that you use that knowledge to help people, big fucking deal, that’s nothing, certainly not a crime, and neither is being in a picture with me, you’re safe baby,” Minho continues. “I protect my people, I would never let anything carelessly slip through the cracks, would never let anything happen to you, to either of you.” 

Hyunjins hand stills on your hip and you can feel him staring at Minho from behind you. He clearly wasn’t aware of his upgraded position in Minhos emotional capacities and you grin in spite of the shitty day. Especially when you feel Hyunjins erection growing against your backside. 

“Shower?” he asks the two of you. 

“You boys go,” you sigh, “I took a shower this afternoon. If my hair gets wet I’ll kill you and I am not fucking anyone in a shower cap,” you laugh, though if you’re being honest your stomach is still queasy and while the thought of getting fucked out in the shower is always appealing, you don’t need the shaking and bouncing right now. 

“You usually shower at night though,” Minho pouts, rubbing his nose against yours. 

“I…” you don’t want him or Hyunjin to know that you got so nervous after talking to the officer that you puked, you do not need them fretting over you, “I spilled something on myself earlier and wanted to clean up after. Besides, I feel like crap today, I’m no good,” you chuckle, stretching out on the bed with a yawn. 

“Then we’ll stay here until you fall asleep,” Minho scoots in and tucks you under his chin while Hyunjin presses himself to your back, and you instantly feel the hardness again. 

“Be right back,” Hyunjin squirms off the bed and trots off toward the bathroom. 

“What’s his problem?” Minho looks at the door. 

You giggle, “Our Hyunjin is feeling a little stiff, if you catch me, I think he went to go fix that.” 

“Oh…” Minho trails off, but you catch the way he keeps his eyes fixed on the door. 

“Go,” you nudge him a bit. 

“Without you?” Minho raises his brow. 

You cock your head to the side, “See, unlike you, I’m not possessive,” you smile and kiss him, giving his bottom lip a little bite, “Go.” 

Truth be told, the scene playing out behind the bathroom door entices you, you can feel the wet pooling between your legs, feeling uncomfortable and slick, and you think of pulling yourself out of bed to join. However, the weight of the last few days seems to be catching up to you, the level of tiredness you feel rivals the way you felt after leaving your third 12hr night shift of the week back at the hospital. You haven’t felt this sleepy in so long that not even the two men getting busy in your bathroom, wishing you were in there with them, could stop your eyes from fluttering shut and immediately going to sleep. 

🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️

The full night of sleep doesn’t seem to even make a dent in your exhaustion. The following day you still drag your feet, unable to do anything productive despite the growing to-do list you’re making in your head. Not to mention that your stomach still doesn’t feel quite right and you begin to wonder if you’ve eaten something or caught a bug. 

When your phone rings, waking you from your second nap of the day you want to toss it into the toilet. 

“We’re about five minutes out,” Jeongin yells into the phone. 

Fuck. 

“Who is it and how bad?” you ask the same question you always do. 

“Seungmin got shot in the leg,” he answers. 

“Okay, I’ll be ready.” 

🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️

Seungmin sits on the kitchen table, his foot propped up in one of the seats as blood drips down his calf. His face contorts everytime you press the gauze to his wound and you only take a tiny smidgen of satisfaction from that. 

“It grazed you,” you squint, “but it grazed you deep. I need to flush it with saline and clean it up before I can decide if you need stitches or not,” you explain. 

“Well do that then, it hurts,” he whines and you roll your eyes. 

“I’ve got to get back to Lee and the others, tell them what we found before you got sniped in the leg,” Jeongin says, pacing back and forth. 

“What did you find?” you wonder out loud. 

“Why do you need to know?” Seungmin snaps but rights himself when you and Jeongin both shoot him a look. “Sorry.” 

“Taehyungs front business is all in hotels, that we knew, and we also know his actual business is heroin, we’ve never known where his storehouse was though, until now. We just found it,” Jeongin says proudly, “that’s got to be where he’s keeping our stolen guns. He couldn’t keep that much hardware hidden in a hotel.” 

“Go,” Seungmin says but looks behind him at Christopher who sits in the living room spectating, “take him with you, no one goes anywhere alone, you heard Lee.” 

“You two good to sit here together?” Jeongin asks with a smirk. 

“I’ll be nice if he does, and if not then I’ll just go in a little deeper with those stitches,” you smile up at Seungmin. 

“Just go, I’m fine,” Seungmin huffs. 

Chris and Jeongin leave and you continue to work silently on Seungmins leg, trying desperately not to think about how sick your stomach feels. 

You clear your throat after several moments, “You know, asking people to stop getting shot so much is a request I never thought I’d have to utter so often,” god your stomach is killing you - banter with Seungmin? Ugh. You are off today.

“Mm, so sorry Princess, that I inconvenienced your day of doing absolutely nothing. You’ve still got pillow marks on your face for Gods sake, have you just been asleep all day?” he retorts. 

“Yep,” you say, swallowing hard, trying to keep whatever is in your stomach from coming up. 

“Makes sense, you look like absolute garbage.” 

“Feel like it too,” you agree, wiping your forehead with the back of your hand. 

“Well fuck __, it’s not fun being an ass to you if you just sit there and take it,” Seungmin scoffs, “What the Hell is wrong with you anyway?” 

“I don’t know,” you frown, pulling your hands away from his leg, “I just…” your hand flies up to your mouth and you run across the kitchen so you can vomit into the sink. 

“Ughhhh,” Seungmin groans, “are you sick or something?”

“I don’t know,” you pant, gripping the edge of the counter, “I think I ate something I shouldn’t have,” you say. 

“Oh sure, that’s what they all say but really you’ve probably got some disgusting, contagious bullshit,” he covers his mouth and nose dramatically with his arm, “stay away from me.” 

“Are you going to stitch yourself up then? Besides, the only people I’ve been around are you guys, are any of you sick? Hm?” 

You pluck a paper towel off the roll and wipe your mouth.

“You’re not pregnant are you?” he laughs and puts his arm back down. 

You freeze, falling back into the chair you’ve been stitching him from. Your eyes go wide as different numbers matrix-drip down your brain. You don’t remember how long it’s been since your period, but you know you’ve had multiple since you started working for Minho, was the last one at the last house? This house? You can’t remember. The realization that you haven’t remembered to get a Depo shot since you were working at the hospital, however, is a much more violent intrusion, hitting you like a semi truck barreling into a brick wall. You told Minho the first time you’d ever been together that you were good, that you were on birth control, and at the time it was true. In the chaos of everything though, you’d not been back to the doctor, you hadn’t even thought of it. How could you not have thought of it?

You look up at Seungmin, body numb and eyes wide, unspeaking. 

He lets out a windstorm of a sigh and rolls his eyes, “Oh for fucks sake.”

Endnotes:

1. Ooofffff. Don’t hurt me

2. I will do tag lists this evening 😘

[macaroonff]

United- Hwang Hyunjin

Genre: Royal Au, enemies to acquaintances, forbidden romance, star crossed

Pairing : Hyunjin x fem!reader

Word Count: 2k

Content Warnings: unsure, pls let me know if you notice any

⟦The crown prince was always tethered to his beliefs, more so when they greatly pleased the ruling monarch, despite its evident flaws. With clashing opinions and moral extremes, you hope to reach out to him.⟧

There was no other explicable inner turmoil that consumed you in this situation. Standing in the corner of the grand room, the chattering of pompous old characters irked you infinitely as you took a glimpse at the crowd through your prickly mask. 

The string quartet played one of his majesty’s composed pieces, as the sound of the instruments carried through the surrounding. Supposedly “like a breeze so beautiful that the palace chicken would be tempted to soar at the height of eagles”. Lord Alan’s comment, not yours. 

You’d never come up with such jarring metaphors, nor understand why the nobles came up with similar figures of speech that blew the brains out of the nation's most intelligent. Scratch that, they were considered to be of the greatest stature when it comes to, said “intellect”.

But here you stood in the company of the very nobles you disliked, at the ‘Annual Winter Ball for Royals and Nobles’ held by his majesty. An event you weren’t supposed to be at but got invited for the sake of...unity? More like Peace that stood as a façade. If it hadn’t been for the crown prince’s impractical suggestion of inviting a few commoners who weld power, you wouldn’t be here. 

“The commoners wouldn’t think we’re ignoring them,” he proclaimed at court as an answer to the monthly revolts. If inviting a handful of commoners to a ball originally meant for the rich was his solution to people fighting for basic perishable items from the storehouse, you could imagine what a colossal king the crown prince would be. 

Standing as the court representative for the Affairs of the People, you merely grunted at the thought of the peacock as he went his rounds greeting the invitees. 

He was clad in a black tailcoat embedded with gold embroidery, a white chiffon shirt under it while a matching golden mask disguised him. But anyone could tell he was the crown prince from the way he stood in the middle of the room, flaunting his rings and accessories trying to flatter his father. It wasn’t long before he found himself in front you in the midst of his hailing. Little glance at you and he thought he recognised your figure.

 “Must be your daughter Lord Alan?”

You snicker, while subtly praising yourself for your thorough effort to match the occasion. Unlike the majority of the public, you were able to afford decent clothes that mirrored the nobles, so it was no surprise when most people couldn’t distinguish you from the aristocracy. The purpose of a masked ball was to conceal your protected anonymity.

“And who might you be, young sir?”

“You’d be surprised if you knew who I am, M'lady.”

To his dismay, you pretended to be unaware of his princely status. His lips formed a rigid scowl, and he attempted to brush his hair back so as to reveal the royal jewels intertwined in between. You simply shrugged and leaned back on a counter while picking up another drink. 

Lord Alan looked at you with shock. He whispers as softly as he could.

“Miss, do you not know who it is? That’s the-”

“I have no interest, Lord, he doesn’t seem very entertaining.” knowing just how much that would bother the fowl.

With that, you move on to the centre of the floor where people had started the waltz. The string quartets switched to allow the larger ensemble to take over. You smiled at other ministers who you could identify, albeit their heavy masks. The finance minister lends out a hand, inviting you to the first dance. Graciously accepting his unseen, far-reaching offer, you start off slow. The first few strings progressed into the faster score, as the minister had a hard time keeping up with you. “You must be someone of high repute, to dance so well… you must have been trained by the best,” he exclaimed, very impressed by your basics.

You were almost disappointed he didn’t realise who you were. 

From all the unprompted conflicts to the alarmingly intense debates you had in court, especially the ones concerning the distribution of money, you hoped he would recognise you the minute he spared you a glance. But like always, he was far too blind-sighted and in his own unreality to care for anything else than himself. Boisterously lousy, just like his dancing.

 You hadn’t even started swaying but he was far behind you. It wasn’t simply the fact that you were the better dancer, which to a degree is true; but the reason for your uncoordinated performance being his poor movement and not your rhythmic brilliance. “I’m afraid I’m not as great a dancer. I think you’re a quarter note behind.” 

Another scowl from another influential person. You loved disturbing their air of conceit, feeding them with the pie they hated most, humble pie. 

 In fact, it brought you infinite joy to see their baffled expression. When else would you get an opportunity to offend so many grandees? If it wasn’t for the occasion, you dare say you could’ve been beheaded. “You must be mistaken here, youth like you don’t understand the essence of slow-paced beauty.” You sigh. “It’s a fast-paced piece.”

He stood in fury, stopping the flow of the dance which triggered a domino-like tumble as every bumped into the two of you after the broken formation. The ensemble stopped playing just as abruptly, and the attention was on both of you in the middle of the hall. Now it wasn’t simply the minister who was furious, but everyone else who was mad at him and at the stagnancy of the atmosphere.

 There was jeering and booing at the following ruckus, and displeasure spread through the place. 

One man, however, took the chance to make his prominence even more dominant. As they say, 'In the midst of Chaos, there is always opportunity.'

The Crown Prince walks towards you, prepared to put on a show. You watch his tall figure approach you from your peripheral view before he takes your hand and faces the minister of finance.

"How could you be so rude as to stop in the middle of the dance? Imagine how despairing it must be to have a partner who cannot dance." This time he spares you a glimpse of his stirring smirk. Wooing all the other ladies in seconds.

The finance minister hastily mumbled small protests but was stopped before he could begin his complaints.

"I'll take it from here sir," he whispers to the man.

Now standing firm, the prince places your hand on his shoulder while his palm moves to your shoulder blade. As for the minister, the piercing stare that followed from the crowd had him cowering away from the dance ring. The racket had dissolved and the ensemble resumed their play. Everyone goes back to the routine though their eyes were trained on today's emerging hero. 

On the other hand, you weren’t sure if you had lucked out or doubled your misfortunes. He made a better dance partner although it was no better company for the evening. 

You didn’t get any additional time to assess the absurdity of your position before you got dragged away with the sound of the double bass note. The man had twirled you so provokingly, you missed a step in between. 

Your stare at him directly, scrutinising his pathetic intentions. His sneer grew wider as he held your gaze.  You try to remove his unnerving smile by stooping just as low, stepping on his foot. A typical move that caught him off guard. Now it was your turn to smile, as the both of you held the last pose before the piece came to an end, your feet still bearing their weight on him.

He tries his very best to slip away but ends up flinching in the process. 

“You don’t look quite well, sir?”

“Maybe if you could move your feet,” he squirms, his grip on you getting tighter as he does so. 

Cocking an eyebrow, you finally let him go, proud at the dent created on his polished leather shoes. He decides to return the spiteful favour in the next dance, as his scorned scowl didn't go unnoticed by his partner. It only fuelled your drive to irk him further. The next piece was lighter, cheery, raising everyone’s spirits. But your spirits were far too high for just an old, merry dance.

 No, you wanted to adamantly make a point. With a pretentious smile painting your lips, you take his hand and begin once more.

 He mirrored your beguiled pretence and moved side by side. He first pulls you towards him, then pushes you the other way, handling you like a rag doll. It felt humiliating but who said he was allowed to conduct the way you moved. The next time he pulled you in, you blow into his feathery lashes, taking the chance to pull him towards you and twirling yourself around before switching places with the pair in front of you.

Even as he charmed the new dancer, he couldn’t take his eyes off of you, plotting petty ploys. But so were you, catching his eyes in between twisted turns and mellow motions. Soon after, you were back in his arms, the piece getting softer as it got slower. He pulls you in again, intertwining your fingers this time. “Let’s play fair, shall we?” you whisper. He smiles an outwardly genuine smile. “Very well.”

You continue in peace, as he moved more gently this time, while you made sure not to step on his feet. No words exchanged, no folly acts, two people drowned in the placidity of the movements. 

If only you could be on the same page when it came to your social views. 

If only he could display the same maturity he did in dance when it came to his lifestyle and ideas. 

Maybe you secretly wished he was your friend in court, hoped he was someone who also existed for the people who weren’t as privileged as himself. It was a stupid wish, as you shook the thought out of your head. He was born with a golden spoon and they were selfish. That was your last conclusion before the second dance came to an end. You didn’t want to be here anymore. It was a stifling place to be in. You gave him the last bow in order to respect the dance but took off as quickly as your nimble legs carried you in the heavy dress. 

Away from the palace, away from the momentary harmony and pleasure. It wasn’t what you came here for, nor was it what you wanted, and it felt hard to leave it behind as you run down the stone steps, feet aching with every step.

The crown prince, on the other hand, runs over to the semi-circular balcony, his heart beating erratically at the thought of this godly dancer not being able to spare their time for him. And it wasn’t because of his ego this time, it was because you had left behind a handkerchief. One that sided with the revolution, one that sided with everything he was supposed to be against. A satin fabric embroidered with the initials ‘U’. Unity. 

He wanted unity just as much as them, but he couldn’t devote himself to it as the prince. But he needed you. He needed someone to help him. He reaches just in time to see you trudge down his steps. In a last plea to keep himself from losing you, he calls out, in the fervent fashion of the foolish prince, he hoped you could pick up on his hints.

“Are you really running away Cinderella? ” he chimes.

You look up at him, his mask removed from his gallant face, all of his features defined under the moonlight, as you took your time to dwell on them. But you rolled your eyes, not wanting to confront him again.

“The clock hasn’t struck twelve yet. Don’t you want one more dance with me, one more display of Unity?” 

You stop in your tracks, alarmed. He never spoke of unity before. You rummage around the folds in your dress, the dread building up. It wasn’t there. You turn around, seeing the precious material in his hands. 

He gives it a gentle kiss, before folding it and putting it back into the breast pocket of his tailored coat, a sincerity shining in his dimmed orbs. 

He embraced it. Unity.

***

[promisesox]

tinkerbell IV

You watched him in the dark expanse of the room except for the soft shine of the lamp on his desk. You sat on the soft cushion of the bed with legs folded, watching as he fidgeted with his clothes in the mirror. Hyunjin looked perfect in black; he could pull off any color but black was your favorite to see on him. He dressed himself casually in a nice t-shirt and black shorts, donning the attire with a silver chain and jewelry. He spent more than enough time on his hair but you weren’t complaining when it gave you more time to spend with him. 

You knew Hyunjin was excited about this party even if he didn’t show it. He always put up a front as if he didn’t really care much for things like this but you knew him better. Last time he went to a party was over Jisung’s house for an all-nighter along with Changbin. 

That was high school.

You breathed out heavily through your nose before climbing off the mattress, the cool hardwood floor against the pads of your feet as you made your way towards him. You slipped in front of him in the small space between him and the mirror with fingers adjusting his chain.   

“Make sure you don’t drink too much. Don’t give any girls your number.” You frowned as soon as you uttered the words, eyebrows knitting together as your eyes flashed up into his. “Who am I fooling even guys would ask for your number. You always look good. Don’t give anyone your number!” You whined quietly, a pout on your lips. You wanted him to have a good time, enjoy himself with his friends and learn how to party. You just wanted to go too but you weren’t exactly dressed to party. You didn’t want to embarrass him and on top of that watch him dance with other girls. 

The familiar sound of the doorbell ringing through the apartment made your heart skip as you glanced to the door already knowing who it could be. Hyunjin brushed past you with quick steps reaching for the knob to open it for his friend behind the door. 

Changbin stood in the doorway, his attire completely different from what the both of you were used to seeing him in. His bucket hat was low enough to cover his eyes but he still gave Hyunjin a dead look as he asked, “Are you ready?”

Of course, I was just waiting for you to get here.” Hyunjin answered hurriedly, stomping his feet into his sneakers and reaching for his cap on the rack. He adjusted it on his head backwards and cut the light off, ushering Changbin out so the two of them could hurry over to the party. You stood at the threshold, holding your hand up with a lonely wave and a pout, quietly calling out to them. 

“Have a good time.”

The door slammed shut behind him, leaving you in the silent apartment all by yourself. You dragged your feet to the bed, collapsing back onto it with an exasperated sigh. You made a noise of a whine mixed in with walrus sounds and rolled over the comforter taking in Hyunjin’s scent. You could feel yourself wanting to cry, wanting to throw a fit but your body knew it was no use. You tried to remind yourself that this was a good thing; Hyunjin was going out and having a good time. He would be back sooner than you think and you’ll find out if he had a good time or not. All you had to do was wait, in this dark and quiet room with nothing but the green light of the alarm clock to keep you company. 

It only took a few minutes to roll by for you to shoot straight up in the bed, huffing out in annoyance. “I want to go too!” 

You slip off the bed and clamber to the floor, crawling over to the windowsill and pushing the curtains to the side. The moon was high in the sky tonight, full and bright to shine down on your lonely form. The gentle company it brought comforted you, only a little as you whined out again. Your chin fell onto your arms as you stared up and cleared your mind. You closed your eyes, letting the sadness in your body completely wash over before you breathed out whispers; whispers only the moon would hear. 

You didn’t know how long you were sitting there until you opened your eyes, seeing the moon in the same place. You pushed your body back and climbed to your feet, seeing the black slip ons covering them. You hurried over the mirror, eyes going wide as you took in the unrecognizable person staring back. Bare shoulders peeked out courtesy of the beautiful blouse, matched with a miniskirt hugging your thighs. Your hair was slicked back falling behind your shoulders, feeling the soft strands tickle the back of your neck. A single blue hair pin stuck out on the side, completing your new look that the moon graced you with. 

You smiled at yourself in the mirror and squealed, twirling around and admiring the way you looked. You couldn’t wait to show yourself off to Hyunjin until a better idea popped into your head, excitement writing over your face as you bolted towards the door. You slipped through the wood and raced towards the steps, flying down and out through the apartment doors into the night. You had a vague idea where you were going; remembering that the spot was close to the house but a bit of a walk. Courtesy of peeking at Hyunjin’s phone and eavesdropping on his conversations, you searched the street signs until you came across a street that had a good amount of people dressed up like you were, heading down to a well lit house that you could only suspect to be the destination. 

You composed yourself and adjusted your clothes before strutting down, trying your best to contain your giggles and enthusiasm as you headed to the house party. The closer you got, realization dawned on you how packed it was, the loud bass of the music masking the laughter and talking of the people in the yard. Anxiety instantly washed over you as your strut turned into small steps, your eyes scanning around in search of Hyunjin. You couldn’t find him outside so your next guess was inside the house, packed with people from the doorway. 

You made your way inside, pushing past the college students and into a dark hallway. The bass pounded in your ears as you went down, seeing an opening into the living room. It was created into a dance floor as girls and guys occupied the floor dancing and drunkenly bumping into one another. You glanced at the bright light coming from the kitchen, your body moving on its own to head straight there. It was only filled with more people, a classic game of beer pong on the island table and cheers for each player that threw the small white ball. You avoided bumping into anyone and headed straight for a free spot in the corner, away from any lingering attention or unwanted eyes. 

You eyed the table and listened to the laughter and cheers for a little while longer until you stared out into the living room, turning your search mode on for familiar faces. You had to squint your eyes with how dark it was, only the flashing led lights letting you make out the faces in the crowd. You glued your back to the wall and listened to how hard your heart was beating along with the bass of the music, thinking of how Hyunjin would react if he saw you. 

“Too shy to play?”

Your head snapped to the side, startled by the voice next to your ear. You blinked your eyes at the boy beside you, watching him chuckle enthusiastically by your surprise. You instantly recognized the smile, how his cheeks made his eyes small when he smiled and how perfect his teeth looked. He was the boy you bumped into back at Hyunjin’s school. 

He held his red cup up, raising an eyebrow playfully. “Chan. You want a drink?”

You shook your head and watched his smile spread across his face gorgeously and he hummed in approval.

“Good girl. You shouldn’t drink, it’s toxic anyways.”he said this as he brought the cup to his lips and tilted his head back, gulping whatever liquid was in it down. You watched his face scrunch up before he made a noise of disgust before leaning closer to your ear again. “You wanna dance or stand here all night long?”

You leaned next to his ear to say aloud, “I’m looking for somebody.”

“Is that somebody looking for you?” He asked back, the glint in his eyes being caught by your stare as your eyebrows knitted close. You opened your mouth to ask a question back until a noise caught your attention. 

“Who’s this cutie?” A boy you didn’t recognize walked up to the two of you, his words slurred and amusement in his voice as he swayed before leaning on Chan’s shoulder. 

“A new friend of mine. She doesn’t want to dance.” Chan answered, looking back at you with a smirk as the boy made a noise of disappointment. He leaned in, pushing Chan back as he closed the distance between the two of you. 

“That’s too bad, cause I can’t let a pretty girl stand here by herself and not have fun.” You opened your mouth to decline but you immediately closed it, already being pulled out towards the dance floor. The feeling of fingers wrapped around your wrist, the warmth of his hand so foreign it surprised your senses so much that all you could do was follow. The warmth soon left you as he let go, beginning to dance and move to the beat of the music. You snapped back into reality and looked around, seeing you was in the sea of bodies. The boy urged you on, yelling over the music to dance with him.

You would have run out, left him and back to your corner or somewhere quieter to escape the attention you weren’t used to. But when you found yourself raising your arms up, moving your hips side to side and a flutter of butterflies in your belly a smile started to spread over your face. It felt good to move your body, feeling other bodies bump into yours and not minding when your feet were stepped on. Nobody was paying attention to you but you were joining in on the fun. 

You let your head fall back and giggled, letting your body do what it wanted to the beat of the music. You twirled and spinned, dancing to your heart's content. You didn’t stop until your feet ached and moved out back to the kitchen to escape the bodies. Your heart was full and delighted, but you knew there was still something missing. So when you finally saw Hyunjin behind the group of people still playing a game of beer pong your face lit up with joy.

“Hyun-”

You cut yourself short, his name dying on your lips as you eyed the girl next to him. Miyeon looked different, just like you did. She was dressed up and had a bit of make-up on to accent her already beautiful features. It made your heart drop a little, knowing she looked better than you did, caught Hyunjin’s attention before you could. 

You got a better look at their faces, seeing Hyunjin’s eyes on Miyeon but no smile on his face. She was saying something to him but you couldn’t hear over the music but she wasn’t smiling either. Neither of them looked happy. It wasn’t until an arm wrapped around her shoulder that his expression changed, and you realized why he wasn’t happy. Another guy who was just as drunk as the person you were with stole her away from the conversation, leading her away from Hyunjin. They both looked back and yelled out to him, probably a goodbye as you watched his lips press into a line and he drank from his red cup. 

You watched the scene go down in front of you but you didn’t have the courage to go to him. You only watched as he continued to drink, cup after cup before he made his way to the floor on the other side. You kept your eyes on him and your chest fluttered, watching as his body naturally moved to the beat. He was much better than the people around him, even if he wasn’t dancing seriously. You finally saw a smile spread across his face as he continued to dance, nodding his head to the beat and cheering on the DJ. You carefully watched his moves, cheering him on silently as he enjoyed himself. You wanted to go out there and join him, show him your outfit and show him you could dance too and have fun. A familiar feeling settled inside you, your body refusing to move where you stood. You were used to this, just watching. You were content to see him enjoy himself at least, this was already a reward within itself. So you told yourself not to be greedy, not to ask for anymore and be content right here. 

*

You weren’t sure what to do in a situation like this. Hyunjin walked in front of you, feet staggering in front of one another as he hummed a tune to himself. Giggles and his song mixed together creating a funny sound that made you laugh as well. You followed behind him with arms ready to catch him if he fell back. Surprisingly he made it this far, already closing the distance towards home as he walked home drunk. 

He stopped in his tracks suddenly and you followed suit. A questioningly look graced your face until your eyes widened, realizing his body slowly tilted forward. 

You yelled out his name and ran in front of him, hands held out to push him back but he didn’t fall. You glanced your head up, and time stopped all together. 

Hyunjin looked at you. Brown eyes staring into yours. He was...looking at you. 

“You’re pretty.”

The words left his mouth and you gasped, in the time that was frozen between the two of you. You could only stare at him, complete awe written over your face as you found a word to say.

“What?”

“I said...you’re the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.” He complimented with a laugh, a staggered foot forward towards you. Another one came after, and another one after that until he was in front of you looking down and accenting the height difference between you two. 

You stumbled over your words barely getting out, “You need to get home, it’s late.” 

“A pretty girl like you is going to take me home?”

You could only nod your head, staring down at the ground as your face heated up with embarrassment. A hand on your wrist shocked you, being pulled in the direction of home with Hyunjin leading you. You couldn’t make out his words, only focusing on his warm hand on your wrist. This wasn’t like before; his hand was familiar and reminded you of home. A flash of memories through your head, and warmth flooded your chest. Emotions ran through your body as you felt it tremble on feelings you couldn’t describe. 

You didn’t realize it when you made it home, not until you were climbing the steps up. Hyunjin struggled with the key until you took over, turning the key and unlocking the door before pushing it open. He pushed you in, hands on your waist before kicking the door closed and guiding you over to the bed giggling all the way.

Hyunjin!” You yelled his name as he turned and fell on top of the mattress and pulled you with him, bouncing from the impact before scooting over to make room. 

“Nooo, let’s go to sleep just like this.” He whined as you struggled against him, giving up and settling into his hold on you. He pulled your body close to his, arms wrapping around your small form and keeping his hands on your back. The action was respectable for his drunken stupor, patting your back gently and feeling his soft breaths against your forehead. 

“I missed you.” 

Your eyes widened a bit to the sudden words, feeling your chest tighten as his words where mouth on your skin. “So...much.” 

You tilted your head back, lips only centimeters away from his own as his hooded eyes stared down into yours. He smiled, humming his tune again until he was singing softly, “I love you so much, and I will find my way back to you.” 

Your heart pulled, a lump forming in your throat. The song that was years old was never forgotten, and you wanted to blurt all the many things you wanted to tell him. You listened to his breaths grow more even, his eyes slowly falling closed as the arms around you grew heavier. You snuggled closer to his body, embracing his warmth and holding in your soft noises. Only letting a single tear run down the side of your face.

Previous                                                                                       Next

[xxsanshinexx]

“So you don’t think it’s weird to invite a stranger along with you to boba?” Were the first words hyunjin said as he slid himself into your passenger seat.

“Why? Are you going to kill me or something?” The embarrassed blush that spread across his cheeks made you smile as you sped off, “I’m just joking… I uh just wanted someone to hang out with.”

You could see Hyunjin frown a little from the corner of your eye, “Yeah, I get that.”

“So is that why you slid up on a stranger’s Snapchat?” You laughed as you took a turn into the shopping district of your city.

“I was just bored too.” Hyunjin scrunched up his nose and leaned back against the leather seats, “and I’m new… I don’t exactly have many people to hang out with.”

“Not even Jisung? You two seem close, even if you’ve only been here for… what like a month or something?”

“Yeah a month,” he nodded, running his gaze over your face, eyes fully concentrated on the road. He had never really talked to you, only seen you from afar in his classes and at school, but you always managed to catch his eye, “But me and Jisung… uh… well we actually kinda hated each other for the first couple of weeks.”

“Oooooo tea,” Your response made him laugh, the noise soft and lighthearted, as you turned onto a rather discarded street, “So you guys are in like a recovery phase? Why’d you hate each other anyways?”

“You’re really nosey, aren’t you?”

“Oh I’m sorry, would you rather sit in complete silence?”

A grin made its way onto his lips at how unabashed you were about having him in the car, despite only knowing each other from roll call in class and maybe an occasional post. It was refreshing to him, seeing as most people barely even said hello to him here. “It was just on sight. We’re both stubborn and stupid and we’re placed right next to each other; and for whatever reason we just had this hatred…I never understood it but we’ve worked it out now.”

“Yeah that sounds like Jisung. You should’ve seen him when he came back from Malaysia, ugh he was the cockiest prick!” Hyunjin was captivated by the way you spoke so freely, even if it was just you and him in the car, “Now... he’s mellowed out a lot more, at least towards me, but he still can be a little annoying. But aren’t all highschoolers?”

You pulled in front of a brightly lit cafe, music and people flowing out of it and Hyunjin couldn’t help but find it lovely. It held white and brown aesthetics and had an overall cheerful nature. The smell of coffee and tea, along with the scents of sweets, was strong enough to pick up as soon as Hyunjin opened the car door. He had never seen this place before, but he had yet to see a lot of the city in his short time here.

“This right here, is the best boba shop in the entire city!” You gestured towards the soft storefront with open arms, and turned to Hyunjin with a wide smile, “I trust you nothing can beat it.”

“You’re that confident?” He smirked, enjoying your energetic tendencies, and opened the door for you, “I’ve been a lot of places Y/n, drank a lot of boba.”

You shook your head as you walked through the door, head still turned towards him, “And this one is going to be the best one yet!”

“You’re already back, Y/n?” A worker laughed from behind the counter and you gave a sheepish smile, “I feel like I saw you yesterday.”

“It was two days ago actually,” You staundered up to the counter with Hyunjin following behind you like a lost puppy, “My addiction isn’t that bad.”

“You make up a solid half of our revenues.”

“And I could be making up a good ninety percent if I had more money,” The worker behind the counter just shook their head and they’re eyes trailed to Hyunjin awkwardly standing behind you.

“I’ve never seen you before, you Y/n’s boyfriend or something?”

Hyunjin blushed at the straight forward questioned and chuckled to ease the newfound awkward setting, “Uh no.. just their...friend.”

The look the worker sent your way made you blush more, in either embarrassment or potential shame, “I-I uh… you know I had to take him to the best boba shop in the city.”

“Sure,” A huff left them as their lips tilted up into a smile, “I already know what Y/n wants, so what can I get you.”

“Do you have honeydew?” you gave Hyunjin a small nod of approval at his choice of boba.

“Coming right up, it’s just gonna be a second.” They left towards the backroom and Hyunjin reached into his pocket, fumbling for his wallet.

You shook your head and put your hand on his arm, shocked at the tingling rush of such a simple action, “You’re not paying. I can get it.”

“You drove here and invited me, I’ll pay it’s fine,” He smirked at the way your eyes gave way to all your emotions, especially your annoyance at his refusal.

“Hyunjin, it’s fine. I can pay, don’t worry about it.” You pleaded, taking out a couple bills to cover the price of your drinks as the worker came back with two drinks in their hands.

“Sucks, I’m paying.” He reached over your head and handed the amused worker a twenty, as well as taking the drinks into hands, “And you keep the change for gas money.”

“You’re really pissing me off, pretty boy,” You huffed but reluctantly took the change into your hand as he turned to walk away with both of your drinks.

“It’s not that hard,” He grinned and you wondered what changed in him to become so playful when five seconds ago he was a stuttering mess.

You just shook your head and stood in front of him, realizing just how tall he was in comparison, “Can I have my drink?”

“Can you say please?” He teasingly raised the drink far above your head, and instead of getting angry you became bashful due to the way the stars in his eyes were grinning. It was weird to think there was so much life in this boy in front of you, and you had never known any of it until twenty minutes ago.

You looked up to him and shook your head, this new sense of merriment dancing over you, “Can I please have my drink, Hyunjin?”

“Only because you asked so nicely, Y/n.” His laughter was the only thing you could focus on, the sound reverberating off the walls as he handed you your drink.

You looked up at him and gave him an amused smile, “Your a lot different than five minutes ago.”

“In what way?” He said and once again held the door open for you with his free hand.

You glanced at him at you walked through the doorway into the chilly night air, “I haven’t decided.”

“Well I hope it’s in a good way then,” He said tilting his head to the side as he took a sip of the drink in his hands, eyes lighting up at the taste, “You weren’t lying when you said this was good boba.”

“You’ll come to learn I never lie, Hyunjin, especially not about boba.”

“I’ll come to learn?” The words made a smile break out on his face, the first time someone had said such words since he had moved here, “So that means you want to see me again?”

The rephrasing of your words made you blush, but you couldn’t deny it, you did want to see Hyunjin again. He had this energy to him that made him easy to talk to, and there was still that hint of mystery due to how the two of you had ended up walking a street with boba in your hands as night.

“Yeah, I do want to see you again.” You turned away from him as you talked, chewing on a boba ball to try and ease your sudden nerves, “It only been like twenty minutes or whatever… but i think you’re pretty cool.”

A bashful giggle escaped Hyunjin’s lips and you couldn’t help but chuckle along with him. He had a sense of peace following him, which contrasted with that childlike energy he easily exuded; he was someone you already felt at home with.

“You’re pretty cool too…” His light giggle was still prominent in his words as he spoke and he trailed off with a shy smile on his face. You were walking so close together than his hand would brush yours ever so slightly when you walked, and you could see him casting you a side glance every time your skin collided with yours. “Can.. Can I hold your hand?”

“Already? You move pretty fast,” You joked, watching as even the nightfall couldn’t cover the redness in Hyunjin’s cheeks. What an enigma he was, you thought to yourself, as you took the initiative to wrap your hands around his much larger ones, “But yeah, you can.”

“Uh.. I..” He stuttered as he moved so that it was also your fingers interlaced and you smiled at how perfectly your hands fit on another. “How..how about that ice cream?”

You smiled up at him and squeezed his hand a little, feeling more at ease than ever, “I pay this time.”

“We’ll see about that.” The sly playful grin was back on his lips and you couldn’t have been more enthralled.

[amethystwrytes]

I will have Part Six of Safe posted tonight or perhaps tomorrow morning. I am still fighting internally with myself on things that I will have to fully commit to if I post as is or if I want to switch up my original ideas and journey for this fic.

I have talked myself in and out of specific things so many times that I’ve got myself in a real mental conundrum here 😬😕🥴😂

[amethystwrytes]

Safe. (Part Five)

Pairing: Hwang Hyunjin X Fem. Reader X Lee Minho

Summary: A broke ER Nurse offers up her services to a large crime organization in exchange for much higher pay and benefits that are unconventional, but lucrative. The life proves to be questionable at best, and downright isolating at worst which leaves her feeling unsure, unstable and dangerous. 

Warnings: Explicit language. Explicit depictions of sex (some chapters will be more explicit than others sexually). Violence. Blood. Trauma injuries. (Organized) Crime. Emotional manipulation. Discussion of murder and physical assault. Medical inaccuracy galore. Smoking. Past addiction. 18+ Only MDNI.

Chapter WC: 5K

AN: (1) Two chapters in one week feels excessive - but it's finished, and it’s Minho's BIRTHDAY after all, and also I think I’d like to start posting on Fridays anyway. (2) I don’t want to talk about the unspeakably preposterous and unbelievable practicality/mechanics of one of these smut scenes. You will know it when you see it and you will shush. *Suspension of disbelief rabble rabble*. Thank you, that is all.

~ PART FIVE ~ [Series M. List Here]

You’re setting the table for supper when you hear the key to the front door twist in the lock. Your stomach hardens and you eye Christopher sitting in the living room. You wonder when someone will be able to open your front door without you thinking that they’re going to come barreling through to hurt you, but it’s only Minho. 

“You can go,” Minho casually instructs Chris, who instantly stands and gives you a nod.

“Here,” you call Christopher over, and hand him a to-go box. You made way too much and even though you’re still sore at him for spilling your secrets, you want the man to eat. He takes it with a smile and a thank you, then heads out. 

Minho waits for him to shut it completely before joining you in the kitchen. 

“God that smells amazing, what did you make?” he wraps his hands around you from behind, his head dipping into the small of your neck and shoulder. 

“Spicy chicken, fried rice, and a cucumber salad because I don’t think I’ve ever seen one of you eat a fucking vegetable,” you smile. 

He chuckles, “You take such good care of us,” he smiles against your face before kissing your cheek. 

You briefly eye the front door, “Where’s Hyunjin?” 

Minhos cheerful expression fades for a split second, but he plucks a cucumber slice out of the bowl and corrects himself, “He went home to clean up a bit. He’s coming.” 

“You didn’t clean up?” you raise an eyebrow at him. 

“Love, I’ve been doing this a long time, trust me when I say I’m clean as a whistle,” he explains. 

You shrug, “Okay, but it’s not polite to eat before everyone arrives, so put that salad in the refrigerator to keep it cool please,” you instruct as you slide the chicken and rice into the oven to keep warm. 

Minho does as he’s told, surprisingly, then looks at you, “I’m sorry.” 

Your brows furrow, “Sorry?” 

He nods, “I’m sorry for what I said to you in your room that day, I’m sorry for threatening to frame you for selling drugs out of the house, I’m sorry for ever giving you a reason to think I would hurt you.” 

You’d been thinking all afternoon of how you want to talk, of what you want to say to both of them this evening, but this you were not expecting. 

You let out a steady breath and nod, “I guess what I wonder then, is why? Why would you say those things? If you truly never intended to hurt me, then why would you say such awful things?” 

He presses his lips into a line and traces the streaks in the marble countertop. 

“Well?” you urge. 

“I’ve acted the way I’ve acted because I wanted you to hate me. You can’t lose people you love if you love no one and no one loves you. My feelings would be easier to resolve and manage if you hated me,” he smiles sadly, “but when you said you weren’t comfortable being seen with me, I realized having you hate me was exceptionally painful, so I did what I do when I get hurt or angry and acted like a fucking asshole. When you looked at me that day, scared and sad…I realized that I’d fucked up.”

“You are so…” you sigh, “Unstable. You know that, right?” 

“Yes,” he chuckles, “I’m aware.” 

You think of his wife and your heart aches for him again, “Were you ever going to tell me about her?” you wonder. 

His eyes widen a bit, he doesn’t need any clarification to know who you’re asking about. 

“Seola? I don’t know,” he answers honestly, “Probably…eventually. I don’t talk about her often, I don’t…I don’t like to. How did you find out about her?” 

“Jisoo did my hair and makeup for the Casino night,” you tell him, you can’t quite measure if he’s upset about you knowing or not, and you don’t want to throw Christopher under the bus, despite his loose lips. Jisoo feels like a safer option. 

He sighs, “Seola…I loved her with my whole heart. I told her early on that she should stay as far away from me as possible, but she wouldn’t,” he smiles. “When she was taken from me, I never thought I’d ever be able to have feelings for anyone else, I didn’t want to. Then you and I met, and at first I thought I could treat you like the other people I’ve slept with over the past few years, use you the way you were using me - for human contact, to feel good, but…” he trails off, unsure of how to explain it. 

“...but it feels like more,” you finish for him. 

“Yes,” he nods, stepping closer to you, taking your face gently between his hands, “it does.” 

He leans down slowly, gently, and kisses your lips. 

“Please don’t leave us,” he whispers, “don’t leave me.” 

“Then don’t ever make me feel like I need to be afraid of you,” you whisper back. 

“I won’t,” he answers. 

“Don’t let them hurt me again,” you add. 

“No one will ever lay a hand on you again baby, not as long as I’m breathing,” he promises.

You press your lips against his, pull his shirt with your fingertips, drawing him into you. His tongue traces the lines of your bottom lip and you greet it with your own. You melt as his hands roam your body, under your shirt to squeeze and caress the warm skin. You moan into his mouth and he pushes you against the countertops. 

You feel him falter and he pulls away, the two of you staring at each other; you wondering why he stopped, and him looking hindered by something unseen. 

“Do you have feelings for Hyunjin?” he asks. You were expecting this question from one or both of them at some point this evening, but it still hits you abrasively. You’re not willing to lie though. If you’re doing this, all of it, then there is no room for a growing pile of lies between you. 

“Yes.” 

“Do you have feelings for me?” 

“Yes, I do,” you nod, lifting your fingers to his hair to play with the dark strands. 

“That’s going to get extremely messy,” he warns. 

“Then it will fit right in, because all of this is a mess,” you say, looking hard at the floor. He lifts your chin up so your gaze finds his. 

“Is that really what you want? Both of us? I need to know.” 

You think for a moment, think about how you should answer, think about what his response is going to be. 

“I want you both.” 

“Is it because I’m not enough? Or because he’s not enough?” he asks, and you hear the defense in his voice, the blow to his pride and it pains you. 

You shake your head, lace your fingers with his, “It’s not that. Not at all.  You are both more than enough. It’s because you both make me feel things that I crave, because you are two polar opposite men, who make me feel so strongly, and so good when I’m with you but in such very different ways, and maybe I’m just being selfish, I know I am actually, but I don’t want to give up the way I feel when I’m with either of you.” 

Minho is about to respond when the knock on the door drags both your attentions away from the conversation. 

“It’s me, Hyunjin,” a muffled voice calls out from behind the door. 

You squeeze Minhos arm and he lays his hand over yours, giving you a halfhearted smile, but a smile, and that’s better than nothing. 

You cross the space and open the front door to Hyunjins sweet smile, the top half of his jet black hair tied up into a wet bun, the scent of his shampoo still fragrant. 

“Hi,” you smile. 

“Hi beautiful.” 

🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️

Dinner starts out dreadfully silent. So silent in fact that you can barely touch your food. Minho and Hyunjin dig in though, stuffing chicken, rice and cucumbers in at an alarming pace that makes you smile. They’re used to silence, to awkwardness. They’ve learned to navigate it, thrive in it, and carry on regardless of the tension. 

“Well, I’d ask you both how your day was but I suppose I know,” you finally attempt a joke, but it doesn’t come out like you intended it to and no one laughs, including you. You grab the cold beer you served with the chicken and take a very long swig. 

Minho wipes his mouth with a napkin and gives you a soft, understanding look, “You wanted us here Love, it’s your meeting so to speak,” he says. 

Hyunjin looks between the two of you as he chews his food, he seems to understand he’s missed part of the conversation, the conversation you started with Minho but this is all ass backwards and not how you wanted to start your ‘meeting.’ 

“Alright, yes,” you clear your throat, “I do have things I want to discuss with both of you.” 

Both men take a break from eating and sit a little straighter, giving you their full attention. You realize now that your hope at a more casual conversation over food was a fruitless endeavor, these men are too serious for casual. 

“I realized something today,” you begin, “I’ve realized that despite what I’ve told myself the past several months, that I am part of this organization. I’ve helped all of you at one point or another, and maybe I’ve just helped in the least criminal of ways, but I have committed crimes with you whether I like it or not. I’ve heard things, I know names, I know what you’ve done, and the things you intend to do, I am an accomplice,” you say it out loud and although it makes it real, there is a part of you that’s relieved to say it to just get it out there. 

Neither Hyunjin or Minho say anything so you continue, “I was going to run, but I think that running away would just mean that I’m running straight into more trouble for myself, for one. But also…” you trail off, “but also, I don’t want to run away from either of you.” 

Hyunjin looks at Minho so quickly that you think it could give him whiplash, but Minho doesn’t react to any of it. 

“But before we talk about that, or what that means, or how to even navigate it, I have terms I’d like to lay out,” you look at both of them. 

“What are your terms Love?” Minho asks, all business, and you wonder if he’s about to produce a pen and notebook to take notes in. 

“First, I don’t like the way some of your guys speak to me as if I’m your personal fuck toy,” you say. 

“Seungmin.” 

Hyunjin and Minho say his name simultaneously. 

“Okay yes, Seungmin, but I don’t want him punished or whatever. I would just like it made clear that while we don’t have to like each other, we don’t need to speak so disrespectfully to one another, and not to sound like a child but he always starts it,” you take another swig of beer. Minho looks as though he’s holding in a chuckle and this puts you at ease a bit. 

“It will be made clear to him and to all my employees that you are to be treated and spoken to with absolutely nothing but respect,” Minho nods with a smile, “What else?” 

“I don’t want to know everything, I don’t need to know everything, but I also don’t want to be treated like Christopher - as just an employee who does as she’s told and is only told the bare minimum. I want to be trusted, and I want you to talk to me freely about things that you need to get off your mind, or things that impact me in any way,” you say. 

“Trust is earned,” Minho says, “but after everything you’ve been through, I believe you’ve more than earned it, so done.” 

“Finally,” you take a breath, “it’s been hard for me since the night I got attacked to be alone here, or anywhere for that matter, and I know you both have things that need done, that you can’t be here all the time, and I appreciate Christopher, and Jisung, and the others…but I want you two - not necessarily at the same time - but I want the two of you.” 

The room sinks back into that familiar silence again and you wait impatiently for someone to say something, you fork some chicken and stuff it in your mouth for something to do. 

“Fine, I’ll be the one to say it,” Hyunjin half laughs, “Are we talking about fucking each other or protection detail?” 

It’s Minhos turn to take an uncomfortably large swig of beer and you have to force the small bite of chicken down your throat roughly. 

“I…well…” you stutter, “In this specific moment I’m talking about who is here in the house with me,” you clarify. 

“And what about outside this specific moment?” Minho asks for more clarification and you realize that the time has come, whether you were ready for it or not, to tell them both what you actually want. Is it what you want? You’ve never attempted a relationship that had more than two people in it, but none of those relationships turned out very well so you can’t really cite them as reliable sources, can you? 

“Honestly?” you inhale deeply and let it go, “Honestly, I wouldn’t be opposed to having you both in the other way at the same time, I’ve never done that before, it would be my first time - but the thought of it makes me wet just imagining it.” 

Hyunjin bites his bottom lip and sits back in his seat. To say you’re suddenly feeling warm is an understatement, so you chug the rest of your beer then get up for another. 

“What do you think about that?” Minho asks Hyunjin. 

Hyunjin licks his lips and you think you might combust, “Well, it wouldn’t be my first time,” he says with a smile that might be a little too proud, “it could be lots of fun,” he says avoiding eye contact with Minho and only looking at you. You swallow hard. 

“How many times have the two of you…” Minho starts, but you answer before he can finish.

“Hyunjin and I have never had sex,” you tell him, trying to keep any emotion from your voice like how it’s a bit disappointing that you’ve not slept with Hyunjin, or how you’re scared that Minho will be upset if you’d said you had, or how excited you are that you might actually get fucked by both of the men sitting with you at this table. 

“Hmm,” Minho nods, “I see.” 

“What do you think about it, boss?” Hyunjin finally looks at him, “We both said we didn’t want to share after all.” 

Only Hwang Hyunjin could look at Lee Minho and say that without it sounding like a challenge, like a threat. 

Minho exhales slowly and shrugs, “It may be a shock to some, but I’m not a closed minded man, however, I am a possessive one,” he looks at you and chews on the inside of his cheek, his eyes narrowing with consideration, “so the answer to your question is that I’m not sure.” 

Your heart sinks a little, and you’re unsure of what to say. 

“We can work with possessive,” Hyunjin says, the corners of his mouth slipping into a coy smile, as if he’s flirting with Minho and your clit throbs, you can feel the way you’re soaked and you press your thighs together.

“Oh?” is all Minho responds with. 

“Mm,” Hyunjin nods, “I’m not a power player, I don’t have to be a top, I don’t have to be a bottom, I’m not picky, and you should know by now I’m very good at being told what to do.” 

You watch as Minhos expression changes, he looks at Hyunjin in a way you’ve never seen him look at any of his guys before, and then he looks at you, “You’re being awfully quiet now darling.” 

It takes you a solid three seconds to realize he’s talking to you, you’re gripping the neck of your beer so hard it might bust. 

“I’m just, thoroughly enjoying this conversation,” you grin. 

“How much?” he asks. 

Well. That was an invitation if you’ve ever heard one. You swallow your sip of beer and stand, shuffling out the wrinkles of your cotton skirt and step closer to him, “Would you like to see?” you ask, bunching up the skirt in your fists higher and higher until the tops of your thighs are exposed. 

Minho chews his lip as his fingertips trace delicate lines up your legs, finally disappearing beneath the fabric, pushing your panties to the side so he can swirl them in your arousal. You gasp, tilting your head back as he moves his fingers against you. 

“My, my,” he whispers, voice gravelly with want, and he looks as if he wants to knock everything off the table to fuck you on it. You wouldn’t be opposed. 

Hyunjin sits motionless on the other side, watching, and though you’ve never really considered how it would make you feel, you find that having him watch feels very good. 

Minho removes his fingers from your cunt and uses them to motion Hyunjin over. Your heart starts pounding. Hyunjin moves slowly, but you can see his erection straining against his pants. 

“So Hyunjin has never played with you?” Minho asks, his eyes on Hyunjin. 

“We’ve kissed…” you manage to speak between catching your breath. 

“But he’s never tasted you? Your pussy that is?” 

You shake your head back and forth. 

“Go on then,” Minho looks at him darkly, touching Hyunjins mouth with his fingertips, spreading your slick across his bottom lip. Hyunjin sucks Minhos fingers into his mouth hungrily, a groan escaping from somewhere deep in his chest. 

“I have to admit, knowing he’s not had you is pretty satisfying to me,” Minho chuckles, yanking his fingers from Hyunjins mouth, “I wonder how far I can push him before he comes undone?” he stands from the table, “Has everyone eaten? No ones starving anymore?” he asks the two of you and finishes off his beer. 

“Not for food,” Hyunjin comments and winks at you. 

“Then let’s go to the living room, shall we?” Minho grabs your hand and pulls you forward, Hyunjin following close behind. 

Minho kisses you deeply, then takes a seat in the armchair, “Why don’t you help our girl out of her pretty clothes?” 

“Gladly,” Hyunjin whispers, taking the hem of your shirt and pulling it over your head, he tosses it across the room then drops to his knees as you unzip the side of your skirt. He helps you shimmy it down into a pool of fabric around your feet and you step away from it. Hyunjin looks up at you, his eyes scanning your body, and he hooks his fingers into your underwear, pulling them slowly down your legs. 

“Don’t even think about putting your lips on her, not yet, I say when,” Minho instructs from the chair. Hyunjin freezes as if that’s exactly what he was about to do. 

“Yes sir,” Hyunjin grins. 

You want to interject and say that if Minho doesn’t give the go ahead soon, you might be the one coming undone, but you stay silent, you’re not sure what to do anyway, and something in your gut tells you it needs to happen like this, for them, in order for Minho to be right with it. 

“Sit on the sofa, Love,” Minho tells you and you sit, like a good girl, on the sofa then look at him for further instruction. He laughs, “You look so eager darling, so fucking turned on, do you want me to be nice for you?” 

“Yes,” you nod frantically, “Please.” 

“Do you want him to taste your cunt finally?” 

“Mmhmm,” you keep nodding, leaning back into the cushions, kneading your breasts. 

“Spread your legs for him, so he can see how fucking gorgeous you are,” he instructs. 

You nearly go out of your mind watching Hyunjin crawl between your legs, his fingernails raking red lines up your thighs. Hyunjin looks behind at Minho for permission. 

“First,” Minho halts him, “take your shirt and pants off, you look dreadfully uncomfortable.” 

Hyunjin smiles and tears his shirt over his head, then stands briefly to remove his trousers before resuming his position between your legs. 

“Now, make our princess cum,” Minho grins. 

Hyunjin does what he’s told, but he also takes his sweet time, licking and sucking kisses on the inside of your thighs and you wonder if he’s savoring the moment like you. This heated, passionate affair that seems to have been building up since the night you sewed stitches into his side. 

Finally, he grabs hold of your thighs roughly and drags you to the edge of the sofa, “you ready Doll?” 

“God, yes…” 

His tongue is eager against your flesh, but in true Hyunjin fashion, is also quick, soft, controlled and deliberate. He was told to make you cum, and he’s honing in on that target like his life depends on it. 

“How does it feel, baby?” Minho asks and you manage to turn your head towards him, “let’s hear you.” 

“It feels so fucking good, he’s so good at it,” you whimper, looking back down at Hyunjin. His eyes lock with yours and you watch as his tongue appears and disappears between your folds. You rest your head back onto the sofa and moan, your hips beginning to move in time with his mouth, you’re so close. 

“She’s about to cum, I can tell by her face,” Minho smiles, and you nod, unable to verbally confirm this, “let go baby, cum for him.” 

Minhos deep, gravelly command paired with Hyunjins soft tongue lapping at you pushes you far beyond your capacity to hold yourself back. Your body quakes as your orgasm ripples over and over, your clit becoming so sensitive you have to physically push Hyunjins face away with your hands and plea with a quiet “stop.” 

Hyunjin is totally out of breath as he sits back on his ankles, he wipes his mouth with his arm, eyes dark, and looks at Minho. 

“How close are you to busting?” Minho chuckles. 

“Very.” 

Minho licks his lips, then unzips his pants, releasing his own cock from the confines of his clothes. He strokes himself gently then nods his head towards you, “Go on then, she loves getting fucked right after you eat her out, don’t you baby?” 

“Yes,” you groan, “Very much.” 

Hyunjin doesn’t hesitate a moment before ripping his boxers down and kicking them away, he takes your shoulders and shoves you down onto the sofa, propping one of your legs on the back and sliding between. 

“I don’t know how long I’ll last,” Hyunjin warns. 

“It’s okay,” you breathe, “you don’t have to make me cum again.” 

“Yes he does,” Minho says coolly from the chair, “yes he fucking does.” 

“Heard,” Hyunjin manages to tease. 

Hyunjin lines himself up with you as you dig your nails into his shoulders, desperate for it, needing it. He pushes in slowly, and your eyes lock as he fills you to the hilt. Your lips part and you wiggle a bit, urging him to move, he does. He’s going impossibly slow, his brows knitted together in concentration. 

“Fuck you’re perfect,” he moans, his hips speeding up just a bit. You can’t help but steal a look at Minho, who watches you both from the same chair he’s been sitting in, slowly stroking himself, lip tucked tightly between his teeth. 

You lift your hips a bit to meet Hyunjins thrusts, sliding your hands down his sides, around his thighs to pull him closer, deeper. 

“Hyunjin,” you whisper, his name a plea for him to do something, though you’re unsure of what. Feeling his cock drag in and out, hitting some delicious spot within, watching Minho look and hearing his little gasps every time you whimper or moan might actually be your undoing. 

Hyunjins movements become more desperate, more erratic, and you’re sure he won’t be able to hold himself back much longer. You take his face in your hands and he looks at you, “Make me cum,” you gently drag his hand down to your neck, his breath stutters as he wraps his long, delicate fingers around your throat to hold you down gently while he fucks into you. You push back with every thrust, causing a rough but welcome collision and you cum so hard around his cock that you can feel it in your very bones. You cry out, hips bucking just a bit off the sofa as you spasm around him. 

He thrusts into you only twice more before freezing, his breath escaping in a muffled moan as he buries his face into your neck. 

Hyunjin pulls you towards him and captures your lips with his.

“Perfect,” he whispers. 

Minho finally makes his way to the couch, Hyunjin moves aside, practically collapsing. 

“Feel better?” Minho smiles, rubbing circles on your legs. 

You nod, claiming his hand in yours to lace your fingers together. 

He looks between your legs, “You’re a mess,” he drags the back of his finger up your slit, swirling Hyunjins leaking fluids around your own. You shudder with a gasp at the stimulation. 

“Come, let’s go upstairs,” Minho stands and extends his hand to you; he pauses briefly in front of Hyunjin and stares, then caresses his jawline with his thumb, “you did good, impressive. Come on.” 

Minho leads you both into the master bath where he reaches into the walk-in to start a shower. You step close to him and start undoing the buttons of his shirt, looking up at him as he strokes your hair. You continue silently undressing him until the three of you stand totally naked in the middle of your steamy bathroom. 

Minho grabs your chin with his fingertips and draws you into him, his mouth desperate for yours and your lips crash together with urgent moans. In your peripheral you can see Hyunjin step into the shower and rinse himself off, he reaches out and tugs on you and Minho, who barely takes his mouth off you to shuffle into the warm water. 

“Is this what you wanted?” Minho asks in a grunt as he picks you up, your legs wrapping around his waist. “Wanted to be our needy little slut, so fucking pretty and sweet, getting fucked out by both of us?” he whispers as your back presses against the cold stone of the shower wall. 

You grin like the cheshire cat and nod, “Mmhmm.” 

Minho smiles and shakes his head at you before his lips overtake yours again, and you also feel Hyunjins hands roaming as he puts himself between your back and the wall, his body much warmer and less scratchy than the stone. You can feel Minhos hard erection sliding against your soaked pussy and your breath hitches. Hyunjins wet hands slide around your body and he fingers at your nipples, stroking and squeezing. Minho leans in and you watch through the steam as he takes Hyunjins mouth with his own, his cock rubbing against your clit as he positions himself to fuck you against Hyunjin. 

This exceeds even your highest expectation of what this experience would be like. Feeling Minho bouncing you on his cock while you listen to the two of them moan into each others mouths, Hyunjins fingers circling your clit gently while the other hand takes turns playing with your breasts and yanking your hair to tilt your head back for neck kisses. 

“Fuck,” you whine, the impossible ache inside you is building again, you can’t remember the last time you orgasmed three times in one evening, or if you ever have, but you’re going to. 

“Gonna cum for me Love?” Minho presses his forehead against yours, breathless, pumping his hips up into you. 

“Yes,” you half laugh in delirium, “Fuck, yes keep going…” 

You can feel his fingertips digging into the sides of your ass, feel how desperate he is to finish, you lean your head forward to kiss him, sucking his bottom lip between your teeth and biting as you reach your high. Your orgasm comes out in a choked gasp, your body completely spent, and you feel him pull out a bit and spill himself all over your cunt. 

Hyunjin washes you off while Minho catches his breath then the three of you, unbothered to put on clothes or even dry off, collapse on your bed, drops of water everywhere but no one caring. 

You’re not surprised that Minho pulls you in immediately, wrapping his arm around you tight - possessive. 

“I can’t believe that just happened,” you sigh, eyes already shut and sleep getting closer and closer to overtaking you. 

“Pleasure isn’t a bad thing people,” Hyunjin yawns, switches off the lamp, then flips to his side to properly sandwich you in. His long, lean arm draped over you while his fingers massage circles on Minhos shoulder. “It’s not this thing that has to be confined in a specific little box, used for one specific purpose at a time like it isn’t supposed to just be this fun, enjoyable thing-,” 

“Hyunjin?” Minho grumbles with closed eyes. 

“Yes boss?”

“Stop talking and go to sleep.” 

“Yes boss,” he laughs.

Endnotes:

I think I'm going to try to tag my taglist besties in the comments this time and see how that goes and where it takes us.

As usual, if you've made it far enough to read this, here's your virtual smooch <3

[amethystwrytes]

Ya’ll. I’m working on chapter five edits of Safe today and fuuuuck me. I hope you guys enjoy this as much as I’ve enjoyed writing it 🤤😈🫦

“Fine, I’ll say it,” Hyunjin half laughs, “are we talking about the three of us fucking each other or are we talking about protection details?”

See ya soon bitches ✌️😘