#Hurt Jake “Hangman” Seresin | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sarahsmi13s · 1 year ago

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Rocks Are Allowed to Crack, Stars Are Allowed to Dim

pairing: jake 'hangman' seresin x fem!pilot!reader

characters: jake seresin, y/n nivans, the daggers, pete mitchell, penny benjamin, diego and benny harding (oc father and son)

warnings: 18+ MDNI, angst, language, ptsd, description of accident, panic attack, injuries, descriptions of scars, flashbacks, fear of death, familial death (mentioned), crying, bottling up feelings, please please let me know if i missed any

word count: ~8.0k

a/n: this has been sitting in my docs and on my wheel for at least a year (please forgive the awkward moments). so i figured i'd take a sliver of the wheel and make him a little lighter! i've also been in a funk lately, so i thought getting something out there might help!

quick summary: everyone deserves someone to comfort them in their time of need, even the ones that always lend their shoulder

Ah, yes, dogfight football. Maverick’s way of creating a team. You play offense and defense at the same time. Tackling each other into the sand, sometimes into the water. It may be chaotic, but it’s fun and a great team building exercise.

Which is why you hated that you were running a little behind.

You sighed as you got out of your car and walked over to where Penny was sitting at the table.

You placed your aviators on your head, “I’m not late am I?” Penny chuckled and shook her head, “Just in time. Want a beer before you go?” You shook your head, “Nah, I’m okay right now. Care to watch my stuff?”

The brunette gestured to the items in front of her, chuckling, “I’m watchin’ everyone else's. I don’t see why not.” You chuckled and sat your wallet, phone, and keys down, as well as your sunglasses. You slipped off your shorts, folding them and laying them down.

“Nivans!”

You turned at the call of your last name, brows raised in curiosity.

It was Maverick.

“Hurry up and get down here!”

You turned to Penny, “This is gonna be fun.” You both laughed before you jogged across the sand to meet everyone by the water.

“Sorry I’m late, Mav.”

Maverick shook his head, “You’re not late, Rockstar. Can’t be late for fun.”

“Not gonna take your t-shirt off?” Phoenix asked when you stood beside her. You shook your head, “Nah, I’m good.”

Hangman sighed, “That’s a shame.”

You chuckled at him and bent down to throw a handful of sand at him.

“Watch it, Rockstar,” Hangman said, his voice light as he glared at you playfully.

“Or what, Hangman?” You challenged, eyes narrowed but a smile pulled at your lips.

Now, you and Hangman joked like this all the time. You considered each other best friends, which confused everyone else on base.

Jake Seresin was an asshole. He was cocky and arrogant. You, Y/N Nivans, were not an asshole. Quite the opposite, actually.

You were humble while still knowing your worth, but also showing anybody up if they proposed a challenge, and not being sour when you lost.

Jake went out looking for competition, you let it come to you.

You were also probably the sweetest thing to walk the planet. Most certainly the sweetest to walk the airstrip.

You were nice to everyone, always giving someone the benefit of the doubt until they truly proved they were an asshole.

You also took care of your team, they were your family. You always had the door open if someone needed to talk. Your arms were wide open when they showed up in the middle of the night because they had a nightmare and couldn’t shake it. You were their rock.

So, when you walked into the Hard Deck that first day of the Uranium Mission and hugged Hangman, everyone was confused — except Coyote who knew you from a year prior. But they didn’t verbally question you, choosing instead to ponder in private.

Hangman sighed, “Come on, Rocky. You're giving your enemy the advantage.” He tugged at your shirt and pulled you into his arms.

You laughed and pushed him away by his chest, “You’re gonna have to catch me first.” Hangman cocked his head to the side, “Oooh, that’s how it is?” You nodded, a smirk playing on your lips, “That’s how it is.”

You panted as you used your shirt to wipe the sweat from your face.

When you let go of your shirt you raised your arms, calling for the ball. They threw it to you and you took off for your endzone.

You felt the sand shift and you knew Hangman was behind you. You had to get rid of the ball, so you called out to your teammate, “Phoenix!” She ran ahead of you and you threw her the ball.

As soon as the ball was out of your hand, Hangman tackled you to the ground.

You laughed as you laid on your stomach, arms out in front of you.

“What was that about ‘catching you’?” Jake grunted from above you.

You didn’t have to look at him to know he was smirking. “Haha, very funny Hangman. Now get off, you’re heavy.”

“First, ouch. Second, nah, you’re comfy.” You laughed and shook your head, attempting to push off the ground and basically buck him off.

But, Hangman wouldn’t let you, laughing as he moved and made you fall back down.

In this new position, Hangman was putting pressure on a certain part of your back and panic shot through you.

“Seriously, dude, get up,” you tried to say with a laugh, not wanting to sound rude or like you were mad at him. He just smiled and rested his chin on his hands.

You closed your eyes and tried to control your breathing, but the waves hitting you pushed you over the edge.

“Jake, get the fuck off me.” You didn’t mean to sound harsh but you were panicking.

Jake was surprised by your tone, along with the use of his first name. He immediately got up and held out a hand for you to take but you just got up and ran to the table.

“Rockstar, where you going?” Maverick asked. You called out while still running, “I need a break for a minute.”

You got to the table, “Is it unlocked?” Penny nodded, “Yeah, why?” “Bathroom break.” Penny just nodded again and watched you take your sunglasses with you as you jogged inside.

Rooster ran over and hit Jake’s arm, “What did you do, Hangman?” Jake shook his head, “I’m not sure.” He put his hands on his hips and watched you disappear into the bar.

He felt bad, he wanted to chase after you and apologize but he didn’t know what he did.

“Well, you seemed to piss her off,” Phoenix said, shoving the ball into his chest.

Maverick looked at Penny but she just shrugged, meaning you didn’t say much.

You ran into the bathroom, throwing yourself into a stall.

You leaned over the toilet and waited to throw up. Tears had started running down your face the minute you stepped in the bar. You coughed and sobbed lightly as you tried to control your breathing.

After a few minutes of that, the nausea subsided and you slowly stood to go to the sink.

You turned the cold water on and splashed your face.

“Shit…”

You closed your eyes as the tight feeling in your chest loosened. You let out a shaky breath and looked in the mirror, cringing at the puffiness around your eyes. You grabbed your sunglasses and slipped them on before leaving the bathroom.

When you stepped outside you saw Maverick and Penny talking, and when you sat down they stopped talking and looked at you concerned.

“You alright? Gave Hangman quite the scare for a second,” Mav asked, squaring his shoulders to you. You nodded, resting your forearms on the table. “Yeah, I’m fine.” You rubbed your forehead, “Hey Pen-”

Before you could finish your sentence, a beer was sat in front of you, causing you to giggle, “Read my mind.”

As he continued to play, Jake still couldn’t get over the fact that you called him ‘Jake’ during a day out.

It wasn’t that you never did, but it was rare that you called anyone by their first name.

But it wasn’t just that, it was the way you said that really made him worry. He had never heard your voice sound like that before.

He looked at you from his spot on the beach, noticing you didn’t come back to join in the fun.

Hangman walked up to Phoenix, worried that he had really upset you and wanted help from the girl you were closest to. “You don’t really think I pissed her off, do you?”

She sighed, “I don’t know, Hangman. Even if you did, I doubt she could stay mad at you for long. She can't be mad at anyone for very long.”

Jake nodded and watched you stand up from your spot at the table.

You finished your beer and stood up, “I’m gonna head out.”

Maverick frowned, “You sure you’re okay, Y/N?”

“Yeah, I’m okay. I just really need to shower. I’ve got sand in places sand shouldn’t be,” you said with a light laugh.

“Okay, drive safe. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Yes, sir.” You collected your stuff and headed to your car.

Jake noticed you leaving and tilted his head, “Hey…” He patted Coyote on the shoulder. “I’ll be right back.”

He jogged up to the table to ask Maverick if he knew anything.

“Is she okay?” Hangman asked as soon as he came to a stop. Maverick shrugged, not looking up at the pilot, “She seemed okay. Said she needed to shower.”

Jake let out a breath, “So she isn’t mad at me?”

“I didn’t say that. But as far as I can tell, she’s just tired.”

Jake licked the sweat off his upper lip, putting his hands on his hips as he looked down.

“Hangman, honey, just go talk to her. If she’s upset with you, she’ll be honest about it,” Penny encouraged, giving Jake a small smile. He nodded and jogged to go find you before you left.

You were standing by your car, the door opened as you moved to get in when he approached.

“Hey, Y/N,” Jake called as he walked over to you. You smiled, “Hey, Hangman.”

Jake swallowed, “Look, I’m sorry about earlier. I was just messing around. I did-”

You held your hand up, cutting him off, “Jake, I’m not mad at you. I know you were just playing. But your tackle jump started my bladder and I wasn’t kidding when I said you were heavy.” You giggled a bit to show him you were teasing.

Hangman visibly relaxed at the sound, “Okay, good. I know I like to get under everyone’s skin. Sometimes I don’t know when to knock it off. I–”

You held up your hand, cutting him off. “Jake, I can handle your teasing. Yeah, you can get a little mean. But I know it’s all a big show. Come here,” you opened your arms and made grabby hands at Jake.

He just shook his head and chuckled, pulling you in by your outstretched hands and letting them find their place around his built torso.

He rubbed his hand on your back, nearly missing the slight tensing right beneath your shoulder blades before they relaxed. His brow furrowed but he didn’t mention it, thinking that maybe it was you tightening your arms around him.

He kissed the top of your head before you pulled away.

“Geez, Jake, you’re sweaty.”

“You’re not too dry yourself, Rockstar.” You laughed and playfully shoved him away. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Y/N.” You smiled and slid into your car, “I’ll kick your ass tomorrow Hangman.”

He scoffed leaning on the roof of your car and the open door. “Since when did you get so cocky?”

You smirked and placed your glasses on your head, forgetting that your eyes could still be red and puffy from earlier. “It’s not cocky if it’s the truth.”

Jake shook his head and looked back to the shore. “Uh-huh. We’ll see.” He leaned back and patted the top of your car. “Drive safe.” You nodded, and he closed your door.

He watched you start it up before driving away.

Jake shook his head and made his way back to the group.

Speaking of the group, they had all noticed the change in Jake when you showed up at the Hard Deck a few months ago.

While he was still his cocky self, having no shame in bragging and trash talking, he seemed to tone it down when you were around.

They also noticed how he always made sure to find you in the crowd, keeping an eye on you. Coyote joked that you had Hangman wrapped around your finger, that he would be at your side with a simple look.

Jake was painfully aware of the effect you had on him.

When he met you a year ago, he was starstruck by your dazzling smile.

So, naturally, in true Hangman fashion, he flirted with you.

With a toothpick between his perfect white teeth and his bright green eyes shining under the yellow lights of the bar, he walked up to you.

“I sure hope no one left you alone.”

When you turned, eyeing him up and down to take in the uniform, beer bottle popping as it left your mouth, his breath was ripped from his lungs.

“Well, you’re here now. I’m not alone.”

Seeing your smile up close caused Hangman to blush, and leaving him thankful that his tan could somewhat hide it.

“Well, ain’t I special.”

You nodded, giggling while looking down at the bar, “That you are. But, before this can go any further, I’m gonna be honest, I’m more dedicated to my work than anything else at the moment. And I have to be up by 5, so I’d hate to lead you on.”

Jake shook his head, but you continued, gesturing around the bar, “I’m sure there are plenty of girls here that would love to get attention from you and give you attention.”

Jake smiled –not smirked, smiled– while leaning on the bar, “Well, the only one I want attention from is you. Plus, I can’t stay out too late either. Gotta be at work early too, so I guess we’re both clocking in early.”

None of the feelings that day had been one sided. You also had been starstruck by Hangman.

He was broad shoulder, tall, tan, and had a voice that could make a girl swoon in a second. But you knew he was a pilot, his uniform gave it away, and you knew how they acted. Except, you liked Jake’s company and decided to talk all night with him.

Ironically, what you both did for work never came up.

So, imagine the look on Jake’s face when he saw you the next day in your flight suit.

“You didn’t tell me you were a pilot.”

You smirked, “You didn’t ask.”

He shook his head, biting his lower lip to hide his smile but failed.

You nodded to him, “What do they call you?”

“Hangman. What about you?” You smiled, “Rockstar.”

You were able to peg why he earned his callsign very early on but he couldn’t seem to figure yours out.

Until he had a close call and couldn’t shake it.

The last day of training had just ended, tomorrow you might not come home, and to say you were nervous was a major understatement.

As you changed to get ready to go out with the squad, you couldn’t stop shaking. You knew you needed a drink… okay a couple drinks.

While you changed, Hangman was walking around, looking for you.

When he walked past the locker room, he caught a glimpse of you reaching to pick something up.

He turned to walk in, but stopped when he saw that you only had your pants on. But, before he could stop himself, his eyes trailed up your back; starting from above your waistline on your pants and going up.

Then he stopped, his eyes widening when he saw the large scar that looked fairly new – maybe a year or so old. It spanned from the middle of your left shoulder blade to nearly below your ribcage and was positioned diagonally across your back.

Jake quickly looked away, realizing that you must have not wanted anyone to see it if you hadn’t told him.

His brow furrowed as questions ran through his mind. Was that why you freaked out during dogfight football, the other day? Why you always tense up when you get an unexpected touch there?

Shit… He thought, feeling like a horrible friend for never noticing and never asking.

Jake took a deep breath and walked away, choosing to approach the locker room differently and pretend he never saw you.

He put on a smile and walked back towards the locker room, “Hey, Rockstar! You almost ready?” He stopped just short of the door, leaning his back against the wall.

Your head jerked up as you pulled your t-shirt down. “Uh, yeah, Hangman. I’ll be ready in a second.”

You finished getting ready and walked out, jumping slightly when he pushed off the wall.

“Geez Hang, don’t do that!” You punched his arm.

“Gosh, I forgot how hard you punch.” He chuckled and rubbed the spot on his arm as you both walked to the parking lot.

You all sat in the Hard Deck, drinking and playing pool.

“Dude, she’s kicking your ass!” Payback laughed as he clapped Hangman on the shoulder.

You were, in fact, kicking Jake’s ass in pool. You couldn’t help the giggle that escaped as the blond narrowed his eyes at Payback.

“Yeah, you feelin’ okay? You’ve been off your game tonight Bagman,” Rooster commented, smirking as he drank his alcohol.

Instead of clapping back at the jab, Jake just rolled his eyes and lined up his shot.

That made you frown, Hangman always had a comeback. Always had sarcastic quips to embarrass the other person. But he was silent.

You made eye contact when he stood, silently asking if he was okay. He just nodded and moved to sink another pool ball.

You didn’t want to drop it, but you did for the sake of having fun before facing the chance of death tomorrow.

Sometime later, after a few rounds of pool and drinks, you all stood around and just talked.

“Hey, did you guys hear about that one pilot that saved her WSO’s life when they got shot down?” Bob asked, looking around the group.

You clenched your jaw slightly, but not enough for anyone to notice.

“Bob, that happens all the time. It’s kinda what we do,” Phoenix said, squeezing his shoulder.

Rooster stood up and sat his beer down. “No, not the way this pilot did. Bob, I know who you’re talking about. I read the mission file, the only thing that was classified was the pilot and WSO’s names.”

You swirled the beer in your glass, not looking up from the amber liquid. “Did the pilot survive?”

When you finished asking, you looked up, trying to ignore the watchful eyes of Hangman as you met Rooster’s eyes.

The latter nodded, “Uh, yeah. Yeah, she did. But she had a pretty serious injury. I’m not sure if she was ever clear to fly again.”

You nodded and looked back down at your glass.

“And the WSO?” Jake asked, eyeing you as you downed the rest of your drink before looking at Rooster and Bob.

“He survived. But I don’t know if he still flies,” Bob answered.

“Well, that’s good that they both survived,” you said, your smile returning to your face.

Rooster shook his head a bit, “Yeah, but that pilot pulled a risky move. Saving some like that…”

Your smile dropped a bit, “People have their reasons.” You raised your glass, “I’m gonna go get another drink.”

Hangman watched you leave as the conversation changed into something more light hearted.

Jake took a step to go after you but Coyote caught his arm. “Hey, come on. Play me in a round of pool. Let’s see if you still got your game.” Jake looked from his friend back to you and saw you laughing with Penny and Maverick at the bar. That allowed him to relax a little bit.

“Oh, I still got my game. Let’s see if you found yours,” he smirked. “There he is!” Coyote laughed and clapped Jake on the back.

As Jake played pool with Coyote, you talked with Penny and Maverick.

“Are you serious?”

You nodded, laughing at Penny’s reaction to you telling her how you and Jake met.

“Pen, why are you surprised? Hangman flirts with every girl,” Maverick said, using his hand to point the direction of the mentioned pilot. You and Penny both nodded your agreement.

“Sounds familiar,” Penny says, a playful grin on her face making Maverick roll his eyes.

You had become so invested in your conversation with Penny and Mav, that you missed Rooster coming up behind you.

He placed his hand on your back, right on your scar, making you tense and jump in surprise.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare ya’ Rocky,” he took his hand off and leaned on the bar.

“You doin’ okay? You seemed a bit…” He glanced back at the group, thinking of the right word. “...tense a minute ago.”

You bit the inside of your lip, had you really been that obvious?

Still, you nodded and gave him your best smile.

But to him, he could see that it didn’t reach your eyes. He may not have been your best friend, but he had seen plenty of your genuine smiles and this one did not make your eyes shine like the others.

Bradley decided not to press, “Okay…” He turned to Penny, “Penny, could we get another round?” The bartender nodded, “Of course, but you’re reaching your cut off.”

Penny had set a cut off for drinks for the pilots not wanting them to go into this mission hungover. You chuckled and glanced back at the group, all of them messing around and having fun. “Yes ma’am.”

You turned to Rooster and then back down to your empty glass. Penny hadn’t refilled it yet, having started a conversation with you as soon as you came over.

You glanced at your watch, seeing that you had been there for a couple hours.

Penny sat a tray down, placing the full glasses on top. “There you are, Rooster. Who’s tab?”

Rooster opened his mouth to tell her to put it on his, but you beat him to it, “Put it on mine Pen.”

“You got the last round, Rockstar,” Rooster argued. You shrugged, “I don’t mind. Plus, I’m closing my tab for tonight.”

“What? You’re heading out already?” You nodded, sliding Penny your card, “I’m hitting my limit, Roos.”

Bradley searched your eyes for a moment, looking for any indication that something was wrong.

You were usually the one that made sure everyone was okay to go home and if they needed rides; so leaving early rung bells in Rooster’s head.

Penny gave you your card and receipt, “Thank you.” “Thanks Pen,” you gave her a smile before turning back to Rooster.

“Tell ‘em I’m heading out. I know if I do it I won’t be able to leave.” You gave him a one armed hug and turned to Maverick, “See you in the morning, Captain.”

“See you in the morning, Rockstar.”

Penny gently squeezed your hand, giving you a small smile as you slid off the bar stool and walked out.

Rooster, Maverick, and Penny watched you leave the building before turning to each other, concern written all over their faces.

“Is she okay? She’s been acting a little off ever since dogfight football the other day,” Penny asked the two pilots.

They both shrugged, Bradley looking up at her. “I was about to ask you the same thing.”

“I’ve noticed, but I thought it was just because Harvard and Yale had to eject the other day,” Mav admitted. “We were all a little shaken up by that…”

It was silent for a minute.

“You know… if one person knows anything, it’d probably be Seresin,” Penny said, pointing over to the pilot, who was very invested in the game he was winning, and basically suggesting that they talk to him.

Bradley sighed, knowing that Penny was right and if anyone knew you the best, it would be him. He grabbed the tray, thanking Penny and walking over to the group.

They all cheered when he sat the tray down, taking a glass for themselves.

Jake noticed that there was an extra and he frowned in confusion before he realized it was for you.

He looked up, eyes searching for you in the crowd, panicking a little when he couldn’t see you, “Where’s Rockstar?”

Rooster sighed, “She closed her tab and left. Said she reached her limit.”

Fanboy frowned a little bit, “Why didn’t she just tell us herself?”

Rooster shrugged, “Said if she did it would take longer for her to leave.”

“Does she seem different to you guys?” Coyote asked, finally voicing his concern that had buit up over the last few days.

The group shared a look before making small noises of agreement.

“I mean, she’s still the same Y/N. Still lighting up a room and being there for us like she always has been… I just… I don’t know.”

Rooster looked at Jake, “Hangman, you’re like her best friend, do you know anything?”

Jake shrugged and shook his head, “All I know is she’s nervous for tomorrow and the accident the other day shook her up a bit, but she hasn’t said anything else.”

He took a large gulp from his beer, hoping to swallow the confession of seeing your scar that he wanted to bring to light. You trusted Jake and he wasn’t about to ruin that by telling the squad what he saw when he wasn’t even supposed to know it was there.

Meanwhile, you walked the beach, taking in the fresh and salty air. You just needed the quiet time before you went home.

You sighed and pulled out your phone, seeing a text from Hangman and laughing slightly at the message.

Hangboy: Hey, I get that I kicked your ass those last few rounds of pool, but you could have told me you were leaving. I would have walked you out. Text me when you get home.

Also, there was an extra beer. I assume it was meant for you, but you left so I drank it. Don’t worry though, I can handle it.

You shook your head and opened your phone, but not to text Jake.

You went to your contacts and pressed the caller ID, putting the phone to your ear as it rang.

“Hey, Rockstar, what's up? It’s been awhile.”

You smiled, sighing, “Sure has been, Tundra. How are you? How’s the little one?” “I’m good. Ben is great, he wants to know when you’ll be by again to visit.”

You giggled at the fact the 6 year old wanted to see you. “Soon… hopefully.” “Y/N, I know that voice. Is it happening again?” You shook your head, despite the fact that Tundra couldn’t see you.

“No, no. Well, sorta, but this is different Diego.” You heard him shift, presumably crossing his arms. “What do you mean?”

You sighed, remembering that you couldn’t share all that much about the mission, even if he was former Navy.

“I don’t know how much I can tell you. But I got called back to TopGun, and I could be flying out on a mission tomorrow. A dangerous one.”

“Y/N, do they know?”

You shook your head again, this time to fight tears. “No, but I’m scared that mid air, I’m gonna freeze. I don’t wanna freeze, Diego. I haven’t frozen since our incident. But I don’t know what’s been wrong these past couple of weeks. I can’t seem to shake off this dread… this-this fear. I do-don’t-”

He cut you off, “Have you talked to anyone recently?”

You were silent and he took that as a no. “Y/N, you have to talk about it if you ever want to move past it.” “I did though. I had mandated therapy for my entire time in recovery.” “And have you been since you recovered?”

You threw a hand up, frustrated, “I thought I was past it! I hadn’t had an attack in a year, not until we were playing football. I-I thought it was just a one time thing, and then something happened during training and I just-”

You were cut off by a small, tired voice.

“Is that Aunt Y/N?”

“It is. Do you want to talk to her? I think she needs to talk to you.” “Yes, please!” You smiled as you heard the phone go to speaker and then be passed to the little boy.

“Hey, Aunt Y/N!”

You smiled, tears finally falling, “Benarino, hey buddy.” “I miss you. When are you coming to visit?” You wiped at your eyes with a shaking hand. “Soon, buddy. Really soon,” you sniffled.

“Aunt Y/N, why are you crying?”

You laughed, coughing a little at the end, “I just really miss you Benny. I can’t wait to see you.”

You looked back at the Hard Deck, seeing your fellow pilots laugh and sing.

“I’m gonna bring a friend too. If that’s okay with your mom and dad?” “That’s alright with me, Rockstar. I’m sure Lila won’t mind.”

“Who is it?”

You brought playfulness into your voice, “You remember the pilot I told you about? The one that thought he could fly better than your Aunt Rocky?”

The little boy giggled, “Yeah!” “Well, I think it’s about time you brought home the boy that stole your heart.”

“Diego,” you hissed. “We are just friends.” “Mhmm, sure.” You scoffed, rolling your eyes, “You should probably get Ben to bed before Lila wakes up.”

You heard Diego grunt as he picked up his son, “Goodnight Benny Boy.” “G’night Aunt Y/N.”

“Call me when you make it back.” You nodded, hand sliding into your back pocket, “Yeah, of course. Night Tundra.” “Night Rockstar.”

The call ended and you slid your phone into your unoccupied back pocket.

You took in a deep breath, trying to relax again. In through the nose, out through the mouth. In, out.

On an inhale, the scent of smoke filled your nostrils and it made you hold your breath.

Quickly looking around, you spotted a bonfire a couple yards away. Realizing it was harmless, you let out the breath and tried to relax your shoulders.

But, despite knowing it was completely harmless, your body went into a state of panic. Your chest tightened, limbs went numb, pain spread through your back, and tears filled your eyes.

You held a hand to your chest, the air stopping just before it made it to your lungs, and stumbled to your car as fast as you could, hoping you weren’t seen by your friends inside the bar.

Jake looked at his phone as he left the bar. You hadn’t texted him, and by now you definitely should have been back to your on base bungalow.

Hangman wasn’t going to panic, he knew you well enough that you would have texted or called him if something bad happened. Of course he felt anxious, who wouldn’t, but he was going to remain calm.

The reason you hadn’t texted him when you got home was because the moment you fumbled yourself into your place, you booked it for the bathroom.

Your knees smacked into the tile and you threw up whatever alcohol you had consumed before the strangled sob ripped itself from your throat. You crumbled to the tile as your chest refused to let air in.

Your skin felt hot and sticky, sweat coating it as you laid on your bathroom floor. It wasn’t helping you, your damp, hot skin sending you back to one of the worst days of your life.

So, in a frenzy, you ripped off your shirt and kicked off your shoes and socks before yanking your pants off, not even loosening your belt.

You crawled over the tub wall, too dizzy to properly stand, before fumbling with the knob to turn the water on.

Once you got it turned on, you jostled the faucet switch, a desperate sob escaping as it kept falling down before it finally stuck, turning the shower on and drenching you in water.

And that was how Jake found you.

Jake decided to stop by your place and check on you, that being his only option to get his anxiety to go away.

When he pulled up to your place and saw your car there, he let out a breath of relief.

He parked his truck behind your car and ran to your door, his chest lighter than before.

But his chest became heavy again when he made it to your door only to find it unlocked. You rarely left your door unlocked, if ever.

He cautiously pushed it open, looking around to see if anything was out of place.

Your keys were on the floor, your phone and wallet not too far from them.

Jake walked further in, making sure to close and lock the door behind him.

He held his breath as he looked for you. But his search was cut short when he heard the shower running.

He exhaled and had to take a minute to calm the drumming in his chest.

He cautiously walked to the bathroom, making sure to knock before walking in. He kept his head down so he didn’t see anything he wasn’t supposed to… again.

“Hey I was-”

The door stopped, hitting something on the floor.

Hangman squinted his eyes in confusion. It was your shoe. He kicked it out of the way and pushed the door open enough for him to just step in and close it.

He stopped with his hand on the door, realizing that the room didn’t feel like a sauna. There was no fog covering the mirrors and steam wasn’t filling the small space. You always showered hot, and right now the bathroom was freezing.

Jake finally looked up and saw you curled in the shower, the water cascading from the faucet and hitting your back. It was obvious you had been there for a while because you were shivering.

Jake sat on the edge of the tub cautiously, not wanting to startle you.

His heart broke at the sound of your quiet crying and the puffy redness of your eyes was a sight Jake never wanted to see again.

The eyes that usually held the brightness of the stars and a kindness that was unmatched, were now red, distant, and constantly filled with tears that fell over and mixed with the water drenching you.

He hated it.

Jake held his hand under the water and recoiled at how cold it was.

“Shit,” he cursed as he quickly turned it off.

When you didn’t react, he knew you truly weren’t in this reality.

“Y/N,” he spoke gently and touched your arm. He sharply inhaled when he discovered how cold you were. “Y/N, darlin’, we need to dry you off and get you in some warm clothes. You’ll get sick.”

Jake wasn’t sure if you heard him because you just stared ahead, biting on your nail. He sighed and pulled your hand away from your mouth.

He moved to pull his hand back but you grabbed it, your freezing cold hand latching onto his warm one. “Please don’t… Jake, please don’t leave.”

Your voice was quiet and broken, raw with fear. And he was sure that sent a shiver up his back.

Jake quickly shifted to kneel beside the tub, his thumb rubbing back and forth on your hand. “I’d never leave you hangin’.”

He looked you over, “Can I pick you up?” You nodded, letting his hand slip from your grip and feel it wrap under your legs.

He awkwardly shifted to lean over and pick you up, grunting a little as stood up. He was too pressed about his clothes getting wet, he’s sure he’s got pants somewhere around here.

Jake managed to open the bathroom door and walked to your bedroom.

He sat you on the bed and quickly grabbed the towel on the back of your desk chair.

Wrapping it around you, Jake kissed the top of your head. “You’re okay. You’re safe,” he spoke gently against your hair.

He pulled back and watched you bite your lip to keep your tears hidden.

You avoided his eyes, looking at your shaking hands.

“I’m gonna get you some clothes, okay?” You slowly nodded, lip trembling before you bit down on it again.

Your eyes didn’t follow him as he walked around your room, but your ears were very aware of Jake’s noises; everything from his footsteps to his mumbling.

In under five minutes, neatly folded clothes were placed beside you and Jake kneeled in front of you, his large hands resting on your biceps gently.

“Do you want me to stay while you change?”

It took you a second to register what he had asked, but he was patient and rubbed reassuring circles on your arms with his thumbs.

You inhaled, the familiar scent of his cologne calming you down a bit.

You were tempted to say yes, you didn’t want to be alone but you also didn’t want Jake to see you any more vulnerable than he already has.

You shook your head, unconsciously pulling the towel tighter around you.

Jake noticed it and nodded, “Okay, I’ll go tidy up your bathroom and throw some blankets in the dryer to fluff them up and get ‘em warm.” He gave you a small smile and stood, leaving the room and the door open just a crack.

You managed to peel off the wet bra and underwear, drying off before changing.

That simple task was exhausting. It felt like your bones had turned to rocks and your muscles no longer existed. But eventually, you did it.

You haphazardly dried your hair, basically just dry enough to where it wasn’t dripping, and walked into the small living room.

You sat on the couch, deciding to occupy your hands with your oversized shirt while you waited for Jake.

Minutes later he was on the couch beside you, wrapping you in the fresh-out-of-the-dryer blanket.

“Thank you…” Your voice had a rawness to it that made Jake shiver, something was really wrong and he didn’t know how to help.

He nodded and rubbed your upper back, “Of course.”

He sat there for a moment, just listening to your sniffles and weeping exhales, before finally turning to face you.

“What’s going on? ‘Cause this-” He gestured to you and your current state. “-is way more than just nerves for tomorrow.”

“I’ll be-”

“If you say ‘fine’, I swear,” he sighed to control his volume. “Y/N, you are not fine.”

“Jake…”

The blond pilot took a deep breath, looking at the sliver of couch cushion between you. “I saw it…”

If you weren’t going to be honest, then he needed to be. Maybe what he saw is connected to what was shaking you to your core all of a sudden.

He finally looked up at you and watched your breathing halt as fear filled your eyes.

Jake continued, making sure to keep his tone even, “I didn’t mean to. I was just looking for you in the locker room today and I-” He stopped talking when you choked out a small cry.

He immediately pulled you into his lap, one hand going to the back of your head and the other arm wrapped around your lower back. “I got you… I got you.”

Jake closed his eyes and rocked you a little as his mind went back to the day these roles were reversed.

Jake had sat in the locker room, flight suit half off and tied around his waist. His knee bouncing as his eyes went in and out of focus.

“Hangman!” You called as you ran down the hall. But he couldn’t hear you with the blood still rushing in his ears.

“Hangman! Hang- There you are!” You jogged to him and saw that his emerald eyes were blank, not the playful or confident eyes you normally saw. “Hey, Hang- Jake what’s wrong?” You knelt in front of him, putting a hand on his bouncing knee to stop it.

Jake looked at you, the concern swimming in your eyes breaking whatever resolve he had left.

The tears he tried so hard to hold in finally spilled down his cheeks.

You instantly cupped his face in your hands, wiping them away, “What’s got you so shaken up? I’ve never seen you like this.”

He shook his head, pushing your hands away as he sat up and leaned against the locker. “You’re not supposed to.”

You sighed and leaned back on your heels, “What happened up there?”

Jake wiped the still flowing tears, shaking his head, “I don’t know. I guess- Fuck I don’t know, Rockstar.”

You stood, “Talk to me, Jake. Please, I’m your friend and I want to help.”

Your tone was desperate and worried. This was a new version of Jake that you would have never seen if you hadn’t followed him off the tarmac.

Hangman finally got the guts to grab your hand and squeeze it. He took a deep breath as he tried to collect himself.

“I almost lost you up there. You’re one of my closest friends, we’ve only known each other for a few months and I feel like we’ve known each other forever. I never let myself be that close to anyone, but you made it so easy.”

His voice was raw and shaky. He was scared, but you couldn’t blame him. What just happened to you both was really intense and it was scary. But you were both okay.

You squeezed his hand back, giving him a soft but encouraging smile.

“Can we just- Shit this is gonna sound so weird…”

You knew where he was going, so you straddled his legs and wrapped him in a hug. “I got you Jake, I got you.”

That was when Jake realized the backstory to your call sign. You were everyone’s rock. You kept everyone sane, even at the expense of yourself.

Which is why you were currently shaking and sobbing in his arms. You never sought out comfort for your problems, a bad habit you picked up in high school. You always put everyone first, and you had it in your head that you couldn’t be vulnerable.

You pulled away from him, not meeting his eyes, “I’m sorry…”

“Why the fuck are you apologizing?”

“Because I-”

“Because you’re being vulnerable in front of someone?” You nodded, unconsciously playing with your fingers. “Look at me, please.” You did, biting your lip to hold your tears in.

“You are allowed to be vulnerable. You are allowed to cry. You are allowed to be scared. You shouldn’t have to hide your feelings from your friends. I’m sorry if we ever made you feel like you couldn’t talk to us.”

You nodded, staying silent, focusing on how Jake had moved his hand from the back of your head to your cheek to rub his thumb back and forth on your cheekbone.

Your silence broke his heart a little bit, making him think you didn’t trust him. But he knew he had to be patient with you.

He goes to move his hand away but you hold it there. “I thought I was over it…”

“Over what, Sweetheart?”

“The accident…”

Jake pushed some hair behind your ear, “What accident?”

You took a deep breath, closing your eyes as a few tears rolled down your cheeks. He wiped them away as he spoke softly, “Take your time…” You nodded, swallowing as you tried to catch your bearings.

“A year before I was stationed with you, I was flying a mission. It was dangerous, but still fairly routine. On my way out, I got hit. It completely destroyed my weapons system. Before I could get back up, I was hit again. This time it took out my engine.” You took another deep breath, looking up at the ceiling.

“We were dropping altitude fast and my WSO and I had to eject. We landed on a beach, we unbuckled so fast,” you chuckled, remembering the relief you and Diego felt before the shit hit the fan.

Jake smiled a little bit at the sound, but dropped it when you started talking again.

“However the jet had also crashed onto the beach too. The fuel had leaked and caused an explosion. I covered my WSO, and a piece of scrap metal lodged itself into my back.”

Jake’s eyes widened, more dots connecting in his mind, “You’re the pilot the squad was talking about at the bar…”

You nodded, wiping your eyes, “Jake, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. It’s just… when I was in recovery, if I wanted to fly again, I had to go through therapy. And I haven’t had an attack in a year…” You got choked up again, hot tears rolling down your face, “Hang, I’m so sorry.”

He shook his head, using both of his hands to wipe your face, “Hey, don’t be sorry. Do I wish you would have told me sooner? Hell yeah, but I understand why you didn’t.” You just nodded and relaxed into his hands.

“What happens when you have an attack?”

You took a sharp inhale through your nose before sighing it out, “It depends. I sometimes get flashbacks of the beach, everytime I close my eyes I just see fire and it’s fucking terrifying. Other times, when it gets really bad, I can feel pain in my back, but that’s rare.”

You bit your lip a little as you looked away, and Jake knew, “That happened tonight didn’t it?” You nodded, coughing a little bit, “Yeah, uh, yeah it did.”

“Was it because we talked about-”

“No," you said quickly. "W-well, I mean kinda… yeah. But there was a bonfire happening on the beach, and just the two things… my brain went into panic mode. Before you ask, I don’t really know what triggers it. But during dogfight football-”

Jake’s eyes widened and he dropped his hands, “Fuck, Y/N, I’m so sorry. I had no idea.”

“Exactly, Jake, you had no idea. It’s not your fault. It was just the pressure on my scar made me panic, and I was back on that damned beach. But I’m not mad or upset with you because you had no idea. So don’t beat yourself up, please.”

Jake nodded, bringing you into a hug again, being mindful of the scar. “Jake, you can touch it. I know I’m safe.” He said nothing and brought a hand to run over the covered scar before tightening his hug.

“Can you tell me about him? Your WSO?”

You nodded, “Diego Harding, call sign Tundra. He has a wife and a son.”

“That’s why you-”

“Yeah, that’s why I covered him. He had a family to go back to.”

“What about you?”

You sighed again, using Jake’s shoulders to sit up, “Most of my family served. My dad was killed in action when I was young. My mom died when I was a teenager, leaving Piers to raise me for a little bit. Then Piers goes and sacrifices himself… so I didn’t have anyone to come home too.”

You shrugged and got off his lap, but snuggled into his side.

He rubbed lazy circles on your bicep. “Well now you do.” You looked up at him confused, “What?”

“You’ve got me to come home to, and I’ve got you.” He placed a chaste kiss on your forehead. “Don’t get sappy on me, Seresin.” He just chuckled.

It was silent for a moment.

“Promise me that you’ll do your best to fly back to me,” he asked in a hushed whisper as if he were telling you a secret.

“Only if you do,” you whispered back.

He held out his pinky, “I promise.” You nodded, interlocking your pinky with his, “I promise too.”

“Can’t break that now, you know,” he chuckled, squeezing your pinky a little. You giggled a little before yawning, “I know, cowboy.”

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sunnystrwbry · 1 month ago

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Sympathy for the Devil (Jake “Hangman” Seresin x Pilot!OC)

For as long as Carly “Devil” Spencer and Jake “Hangman” Seresin have known each other, they haven’t gotten along. What happens when Carly, a pilot notorious for her vengeance in the sky is sent on a suicide mission? How will it affect her and her team? How will it affect the man who has been hiding his feelings for her since they met?

Warnings: Suicidal themes, violence, language, injury descriptions, captivity, torture

4 Chapters - 11k Words

This floats between second and third person point of view, it’s almost a reader insert. Apologies for any inaccuracies and mistakes in advance. This is my first fic!

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Chapter 1

Carly Spencer carried her duffle bag across the hot tarmac of the military base runway. She was on her way to San Diego from where she’d been stationed in Afghanistan for the past year. Being a fighter pilot almost guaranteed moving to different countries and bases multiple times a year, but this move was different. She’d received the order to go back to Top Gun along with some other pilots to prepare for a mission.

She wondered who else would be training for this mission with her, and what kind of mission it would be. Probably nothing good considering the callback of multiple pilots to Top Gun.

The flight out of Afghanistan was cutting it extremely close to when you needed to be at the base, but finally the plane landed in San Diego. Everyone else was already gathered in the hangar and seated to listen to Maverick teach about the mission. You immediately recognized many of the pilots in the room. Rooster, Phoenix, Payback, and Hangman. You hadn’t seen Hangman since the assignment you had before shipping out to Afghanistan. Despite his arrogant demeanor, unpredictable actions, and the fact that the two of you didn’t exactly get along, he was actually kinda charming. You didn’t want to admit it, but you really did like him. Maybe things would be different this time.

When Rooster saw you walk in, he sent a warm smile your way along with a wave. Your eyes scanned the room for an empty seat, the only one happened to be next to Hangman.

His eyes met yours as you sat down, “Man, you look like shit Spence, too hard to dress up like the rest of us huh?”

“Fuck off Seresin.” Your voice was low.

Maverick greeted everyone and his eyes landed on you, sitting there, still wearing your fatigues covered in Afghan dirt.

“Devil, nice of you to finally join us.”

“Sorry sir, flights out of Afghanistan aren’t exactly quick.”

He smiled, “Oh I’m sure they aren’t. Heard you became an ace over there, is that true?”

At that moment all eyes were on you.

“Yes sir, that’s true.” you replied.

Memories from your time in the Middle East flooded your mind. The last year you had been stationed there you’d experienced the worst of the worst. After being shot down and held captive for five days, you’d finally escaped and made the long journey back to base, the memory made you shudder, but you couldn’t think about that right now.

“Good to know my training did you well. That also means you’re the only Ace in our group, besides me of course,” Mav said, “Let’s get started.”

The objective of the mission was to take out a munitions factory just outside of Bagram. Only one jet could be sent in due to sanctions in the city limits, and the sanctions also prevented unmanned strikes. The plant is heavily guarded by anti aircraft guns, and jets were on patrol to defend it in case of an attack. It would be a dogfight on the way in and on the way out, and an unfair one at that. Maverick asked the group if they had any questions. Nobody wanted to say a word. Phoenix looked at you worriedly. This was a suicide mission.

Rooster finally spoke up, “So, uh, how do we decide which one of us is going to go?”

He had asked the question that nobody else wanted to.

Maverick took a deep breath, “One pilot from the group will be ordered to fly. One of you will be a reserve in case anything out of the ordinary happens. Now, the list with your training partners is up on the board behind me, so come take a look and head out to the tarmac.”

You let out a huff of air when you saw that your partner was Hangman.

“Aww c‘mon Devil how can you be upset when we make such a great team,” he teased.

Once everyone was on the tarmac, Mav explained your first training exercise.

“You’ll be in separate aircraft flying in a tight formation. This exercise will help you learn to trust your partners abilities.”

You and Hangman were the last ones to go.

“Hangman, moving into position,” he called out over the radio.

This exercise was incredibly simple, just fly a course in formation, what could go wrong?

“Oh fuck-,” Carly’s remark came through the radio, “Bird Strike! Bird Strike! Right engine is down, right engine is on fire! Deploying fire suppression, right engine is still burning! Dammit, there’s fire in the cockpit, I gotta bail out! Eject! Eject!” she exclaimed.

His eyes were wide, looking for her parachute as he circled back to the crash site. Finally he spotted her. She was lying next to her parachute, a few hundred yards from the remains of the jet.

“I have eyes on Devil, get medics out here asap, this is Hangman, requesting clearance to land.”

The fluorescent lights of the hospital burned into your eyes as you opened them. The surrounding room was bland, and the little beeps of the monitor beside the bed were getting annoying. You moved the blankets off of your body, checking for any injuries sustained during the crash. When you were satisfied that there were no major injuries, just a few cuts and bruises, a small burn, and a perpetual soreness. You pressed your call button, hoping that the doctors could fill you in on your condition. A doctor came into the room and said that you were okay and that your scans looked good. He also asked if you were ready to see some visitors.

“What visitors? How long have I been out?”

The doctor flipped open his chart, “Well according to this you’ve been out for about 8 hours, and there’s a guy that has been waiting to see you for a while.”

“Alright then, send him in.”

“How are you feeling?” Jake asked as he sat down in the chair beside your bed.

“Worse now that you’re here,” you laughed, then winced, “Honestly, I'm feeling alright considering I can’t remember a damn thing that happened after I ejected.”

Jake leaned back in his chair and stretched, “Well, how about I tell you while I drive you home.”

The doctor returned with your discharge papers and a set of clothes. After he disconnected your monitors and IVs you put on the sweats and T-shirt. After finding your boots in a bag with your helmet and ruined flight suit, you were ready to go home.

You walked towards his truck, and he opened your door before heading around to his. Why was he being so nice all of the sudden? Your address was already in the GPS, which was almost as confusing as him being the one to take you home instead of Bradley or Nat, but you were too tired to ask questions.

“You’re gonna have to take me back to the hangar, my keys are in my duffel.” you said.

“Your duffel’s in the back seat,” he said as he pulled out of the hospital parking lot, “Now, about what happened, you were losing altitude and the jet was on fire. You ejected, but part of your parachute was damaged because of the fire, so you had a really rough landing,” he explained.

“Damn,” you sighed.

The rest of the drive was silent, and finally Jake was pulling into the driveway in front of your little white house. You opened the back door of his truck and dug through your duffel for your phone and keys. His duffel was back there too. He grabbed the bag with your flight gear and your duffel.

“Oh I can get that,” you reached for the duffel in his hand.

“Nope, I got it, do you own this place?”

You shut the door of the truck and began walking to the front door, “Yeah, I’ve actually owned it since a little after our first time at Top Gun, the area’s just so nice, so whenever I’m not deployed I’m here.”

The door clicked open, you sure were glad to be home.

“You've got a nice place Devil, doesn’t look like hell at all,” he laughed.

“You’re such an ass.” She said only half jokingly.

The house had warm wood floors, and most of the walls were white besides some accent walls of gray blue. All of the furniture was a mix of wood and cozy fabric, and there were pictures scattered throughout. As he followed you further into the home he saw a bookshelf that was filled with models of different planes, plaques and medals from your time in the military, and right in the center was your Top Gun trophy.

“You can just set those behind the couch,” her voice carried in from the kitchen, “Are you staying with the rest of the team at that hotel?”

“Well I was until they cancelled my reservation, so I’m gonna see if Bradshaw will lend me his floor,” he laughed.

“I’ve got a guest room you can stay in if you want,” you offered as you walked back into the living room.

“That would be great, thanks Spence.”

“No problem, thanks for driving me home.”

This was his chance. His chance to redeem himself and hopefully reconcile a friendship with the woman he had fallen for and then hid his feelings for. He’d been hiding behind an especially bad attitude towards her since they met. It was the only way he could protect himself from the fact that she was too good to be with him. This mission was giving him the best chance in the worst circumstances. And maybe, just maybe he could find the courage to tell her how he really feels. “Okay, there’s towels in the closet at the end of the hall and everything else you need should be in the vanity of the guest bathroom. Just let me know if you need anything else, I’ll be in my room.”

With that you shut the door of your room. The clothes from the hospital dropped to the floor of your bathroom as you hopped in the shower, it probably wouldn’t be good for your wounds but the smell of jet fuel and dirt lingered on your skin. After exiting the shower, you started to re-dress your wounds, examining each one of them carefully. As soon as your head hit the pillow, you were out, and what felt like 5 seconds later your alarm was blaring.

Jake was ready for the day before her alarm went off, he had woken up before his own alarm and failed to go back to sleep. He had been sitting at the desk in the guest room for about an hour, and found himself reading one of the books he’d found in the desk drawer, occasionally replying to a message from Rooster. The doorbell rang and he heard her go to answer it. Now that there was no risk of waking her up, he left the room and wandered into the kitchen. Her toned frame was clad in shorts and a tank top. All of the damage from yesterday’s crash was on display, and so were her various scars and tattoos. Her hair was shorter than when he’d last seen her a little over a year ago. Now it was just long enough to grace her shoulders. She had changed so much since their first time at Top Gun years ago, but she was still absolutely stunning.

“I’m making eggs, bacon, and toast if you want any,” her voice snapped him out of his trance. She must’ve gone to the door for a grocery delivery.

“Yeah for sure, thank you.”

They sat down at the table to eat, and Jake spoke up, “So, are you still doing those engineering contracts on the side?”

“Yeah I am, been doing a lot of contract work for Lockheed Martin, helping develop new planes and such. I’m lucky that I can do that in my downtime between missions, and I can’t lie, the extra income is really nice.”

“Ever thought about doing that full time?” His question made her freeze.

She struggled to come up with an answer, “You know, I came real close about five months ago, but not now.”

With that she got up from the table and went back into her room. He didn’t mean to make her uncomfortable, but it made him question; what happened five months ago?

When she returned she was dressed in her flight suit.

“Ready to go?” he asked.

“Yup, I’m drivin’ though,” she said with a smile.

Her slight southern accent was like music to his ears. He followed her into the garage, whistling when he saw her car.

“Do me a favor and don’t kill us on the way to work okay?”

She laughed, “I won’t, this car is my everything, been dreaming of it since I was a kid.”

It was a black Porsche 911 Turbo that she had gotten a few months before shipping out to Afghanistan. Even though it was almost ten years old, it was like a fighter jet for the road. She backed it out of the garage, and they sped off towards the base.

“Holy shit,” Jake breathed as he got out of the car.

“Seresin, you scream like a little girl,” you said with a laugh.

“I’m gonna have Bradley drive me back to your place tonight,” he said between heavy breaths.

“I’m gonna make sure Bradley doesn’t do that, and nobody else will either,” you teased.

He laughed, “Why would they ever do that to me?”

“Because they like me more,” you retorted as you walked into the hangar.

“Good to see you’re in one piece, Devil!” Bradley said as he walked over to greet you.

Phoenix waved her hand at you, beckoning you over to where she was sitting. Rooster gave you a quick hug and then started talking to Jake, so you went over to Nat. You’d been good friends with Bradley and Nat since you’d met them on a mission before you all ended up at Top Gun.

“What the hell is up with you and Hangman?” she asked with a raised brow.

“Nothing? We’re finally getting along that’s all.”

She glared at you, “So you’re just letting him stay at your house and driving him over here out of the kindness of your own heart?”

“Yep.”

“That makes no sense.”

“Listen Nat he’s been pretty nice since the crash yesterday and I’m not gonna be an ass just because we’ve had some disagreements in the past. I don’t want to go on this mission with regrets of how I treated people and I don’t think he does either, that’s all.” She didn’t need to know that you’d liked Jake for a while, nobody did.

“Did you tell her?” Bradley asked Jake. “No, we’re finally getting along better, I don’t want to ruin it.”

“Well, you’re gonna have to tell her eventually, but don’t worry, I’ll be your wingman.” He winked, and then started walking towards where Carly and Nat sat.

The two men sat down in front of you and Phoenix.

“Hangman, how’s stuff going with that girl you like?” Rooster asked abruptly.

“God help her.” Phoenix stifled a laugh.

“I haven’t asked her out yet, don’t want to ruin things between us.” Jake looked like he’d rather be anywhere else at the moment.

A part of you was sad about hearing that Jake liked someone, because you knew that he didn’t like you the way you liked him. You shouldn’t have fallen for him the way you did, but he was just so charming and funny and sassy, even if he was a little mean sometimes. He could have any girl he wanted, it wouldn’t be you.

“Why not just ask her out? What’s the worst that could happen?” Phoenix inquired.

Jake just sighed.

“You’ll never know how she really feels unless you ask, and yeah maybe things don’t turn out the way you want, but at least you can say you tried and move on.” You wished you could take your own advice.

Maverick came into the hangar and immediately pulled you aside into an office. He shut the door behind you, and let out a huge sigh.

“Carly, I don’t even know where to begin, I just, are you okay after yesterday?”

“Yeah I am, but that’s not what this is about is it?”

“No it’s not, I started looking over everyone’s files last night, and when I got to yours I just lost it. Hell, you’ve had 3 confirmed kills in the past year, that’s almost as many as my whole career, and then you get shot down and there’s no record of you for three weeks until you show up in the med bay at your base, and then you’re in the hospital for a month. What the hell happened, and why aren’t you retired?”

“Sir, with all due respect, I’ve only ever told one person about what happened in those few weeks and that's not about to change. The reason I haven’t retired is because this job is everything I have. I’ve got no family, just the people out there in that room,” your breathing was heavy, “What’s got you so broken up over me anyway?”

“It’s the fact that I have to send someone on that mission, and based on records alone you’re the best person to get the job done, but you shouldn’t even be here. You should be at home living your life however you want, and it kills me.”

“This is how I want to live my life Mav, you don’t need to worry about me.” With that you exited the office and sat down next to Nat once again.

She gave you a look, as did Jake and Bradley. You’d have to deal with their questions later. Maverick explained todays exercise. We would have to practice dogfighting that was one versus everyone.

“Alright, Hangman you’re dead,” Mav said over the radio, “Devil, you’re up.”

There were 6 different planes you’d need to take out to complete this exercise. You started flying, taking out the first plane in under a minute, then the second, then the third, only three left. Hangman and Maverick were on your tail, and Rooster was god knows where. You pulled up suddenly, pushing the throttle as far as it would go, inverting yourself into almost a loop. Mav split off to the right, and Hangman was in your sights, two clicks of the trigger and he was done. Now where were the last two? You looked around, and spotted them flying side by side above and ahead of you. They started to bank left, so you flew under and up at them, two more clicks and Maverick was done. You passed between the wings of his and Roosters jets. After a couple more maneuvers, you got Rooster in your sights and he was out as well.

“Congratulations, Devil.” Mav said as you hopped out of your jet.

You walked back to the hangar where everyone else was already gathered, chatter could be heard from the group, but they stopped as soon as you joined them. “Somethin’ wrong?” you asked.

“Let’s just say we’re all glad that you’re on our side.” Rooster said.

“Definitely,” Payback laughed. “So, we know you’re an ace, but how many kills do you really have?”

“Six”

“You’re fucking kidding right?” Rooster asked in disbelief.

“I’m dead serious.”

“And to think you had two when we graduated from Top Gun, that’s insane,” Rooster shook his head.

“That’s why we call her Devil, she escorts people to hell,” Hangman chimed in.

“Yeah, on one of her first training flights she and her wingman encountered a couple of enemy jets. One thing led to another and she had her first air to air kill under her belt. That’s also when we decided on her call sign,” Rooster elaborated.

You just sighed and shook your head. The group decided to go to the Hard Deck to get a few beers, and play some pool. There were only two weeks before the mission, and you couldn’t stop thinking about it.

Chapter 2

You were sat at a table with Hangman, Rooster, Phoenix, and Payback, still nursing your first beer.

“So what happened with Mav this morning?” Phoenix inquired.

“Yeah you looked pretty rattled,” Bradley said.

“He’s on my case about not being retired, says I shouldn’t even be here.”

Jake knitted his brows together, “Well is there a reason for him to think you should be retired?”

“I think it’s got something to do with my last deployment.”

“Afghanistan huh?” you nodded and after taking another sip of his beer Rooster continued, “A few weeks ago I was talking to a marine sharpshooter that had just finished his deployment there, and he told me about how he’d seen a pilot that had been shot down, and how he watched him make his way across enemy territory for about a day, said he probably never made it out of the city.”

It felt like you were back there, the worst time of your life was running through your head again and it wouldn’t stop. Every terrible moment, every little detail, all of it was still there as if it had happened yesterday. Your eyes scanned around the bar and you rubbed your index finger over your thumb; it was a nervous habit you had developed. Some pilot that you didn’t know was listening in on the conversation and decided to speak up.

“Maybe if he was a better pilot he wouldn’t have been in that situation in the first place, I mean damn, it’s really not that hard to keep from getting shot down.”

If looks could kill yours would’ve. “You’re dead wrong.”

“How so sweetheart?”

You stood up from your chair, grabbing the back of it so that you didn’t do something that you’d regret.

You didn’t notice it, but Jake was immediately on edge. He was going to back you up if you needed it.

“Great pilots get shot down because they’re sent on the most dangerous missions, and despite what you might think, it is hard to not get shot down, especially when you’re dogfighting while dodging SAMs and anti-aircraft rounds in enemy airspace.”

“She’s right you know,” Jake’s eyes briefly met yours before he continued,“ you’ll change your opinion after being in a situation like that.”

His tone was condescending enough to send the guy to the other side of the bar.

“Carly you got any stories from over there?” Nat looked to where you still stood behind your chair.

“None that I’m itchin’ to tell,” you grabbed your keys from the table, “I’m gonna call it a night, we’ve got another long day tomorrow.”

Jake followed you out to the car, “Want to let me drive it?” He smirked.

“Over my dead body, Seresin.” You sighed as you got into the car.

“Thanks for having my back in there by the way, I appreciate it.” She sent a brief smile his way.

“No problem, I know you usually handle that stuff, but it just seemed like he really got under your skin.”

“Yeah,” she muttered.

Jake replayed the events of the night. That story Rooster had told had made you uncomfortable, he could tell by your eyes, you looked trapped, like you were looking for a way out. Then there was that pilot that you’d told off. He remembered what you said about your contract work that morning. Five months ago. Was she the pilot in that story Rooster was telling?

When you entered the house you headed to the kitchen, grabbed a water, and sat down on the couch. You just needed some time to gather yourself before bed, but Jake had other plans.

“That pilot in that story Bradshaw was telling, it was you wasn’t it?” His eyes flickered over the features of your face as he sat down beside you on the couch, waiting for an answer.

“Yeah,” you managed to say after a long deep breath. He just looked at you, brows slightly furrowed like he was waiting for you to elaborate. You rubbed your index finger over the top of your thumb, still unable to meet his gaze. Then you finally looked up at him, not knowing what to expect.

“I’m sorry.”

That might have been the last thing you thought he would say. You retreated to your room. The shower was hot, and your mind was trashed from the events of the day. You just hoped that Jake wouldn’t say anything to the rest of the team. Him knowing was already more than enough to deal with, and the thought of everyone knowing what happened over there, what you did, made you sick to your stomach. They would hate you if they knew, and they were all you had. You couldn’t afford lose them. You wrapped yourself in the blankets of your bed, desperately trying to fall asleep.

Jake looked up at the ceiling of the guest room. So many questions were running through his head. How’d she get shot down? How’d she manage to make it out of enemy territory alive? Why wouldn’t she tell anyone about any of it? Was she scared that it would happen again? He couldn’t process how you could risk going through that again on this upcoming mission. Then there was the fact that there’s a lot more to the story of what happened to you than anyone knows. She just bottles it up and deals with it on her own? That’s not healthy. He was getting a headache from just the little bit that he knew. Living through the whole thing would be hell. He just wished he could help you somehow; seeing you in distress was not something he enjoyed. With a yawn he turned off the bedside lamp and adjusted the covers, he needed to get some rest.

Your legs were bound to a wooden chair by ropes and your arms were tied behind your back. Your blood stained flight suit was around your waist, a tattered black shirt clung to your upper body, and your boots were no longer on your feet.

Your eyes flew open, taking in the surroundings of your bedroom. Your breaths were quick and heavy, and a few stray tears clung to your cheeks. The clock on the bedside table read 3:56. There was really no point in trying to go back to sleep when you’d need to be up in an hour anyway, so you decided to make an early run to the gym. You got dressed, filled a water bottle and returned to your bedroom to gather the rest of your things. This was the best way to de-stress after a nightmare. Fortunately this is the first time you’d had one in almost a month.

Jake woke up to the sound of footsteps in the kitchen. He could hear her filling a water bottle and grabbing her keys, but why so early? He swung his legs over the edge of the bed, neglecting to pull on a shirt and ventured out into the hallway that led to the living room. She came out of her bedroom as he reached the living room. She seemed surprised that he was awake. Her brows raised slightly and she glanced at his muscular frame, doing her best to be discreet.

“Why’re you up so early?” His voice was tired, and while he had noticed her look towards his bare torso, he didn’t mind.

“Couldn’t sleep, so I’m going to the gym. Sorry for waking you up.”

“It’s okay I’m a light sleeper, product of our line of work I think,” he softly laughed.

“You got that right,” she smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes like he was used to seeing, “I’ll see ya later.” She disappeared through the garage door and Jake sighed.

He wanted to ask her so many questions. He wanted to understand why she would put herself in a situation that was very likely to end with her being shot down over enemy territory again. He also wanted her to know that he cared about her. She was lovely. Strong, motivated, brave, funny, smart, beautiful, and caring. She was wonderful. He just wished he could tell her that without screwing up their newfound friendship. He was afraid that she didn’t feel the same way about him. And even if she did feel the same way, there was a likely chance that he would lose her. Thoughts about her continued to flood his head while he made some coffee and eggs.

At the gym Carly was de-stressing with some running and then some yoga. She thought about Jake. What would he say if he knew about the nightmare. What does he think about the Afghanistan situation? He might not know the whole story, but he didn’t need to. He could still judge her and make assumptions. What if he told their team? What if he told Maverick? God that would be bad. She might have been over the nightmare but the fact that Jake knew about what happened in Afghanistan was eating away at her.

She drove home, listening to some classic rock on the radio. Once she stepped into the house, the smell of coffee was evident. Walking into the kitchen she found half a pot that was still warm. She poured a cup and went into the living room, where she looked at the morning news on her phone. Jake had heard her come in while he was finishing getting ready for the day. He wanted to talk with her about last night. He came out into the living room and sat down beside her on the couch. Their eyes met but no words were exchanged.

A somewhat comfortable silence was broken when Jake began to speak. “So, why haven’t you told anyone about what happened over there?”

“Y'all don’t need to know about it.” Her eyes were mean, they didn’t look at him, they looked through him.

“Listen I know you’re upset and you have every right to be, but I’m worried about you, keeping all of the awful things to yourself only does more harm.”

What had gotten into him? You knew he was right about bottling up those emotions and experiences, but still couldn’t bear the thought of the judgement you might receive from him.

“Why do you care?” she snapped.

“Because you’re my friend.” The expression on his face was a mix of hurt and confusion.

It looked like he genuinely cared about your wellbeing. As much as you liked him you still didn’t trust him fully, you couldn’t risk it. Your head was down, and silent tears rolled off your cheeks and on to the front of your shirt. Jake reached over and gently squeezed your hand,

“If you ever change your mind and want to talk about anything, I’m here to listen.” He let go of your hand and got up from the couch.

After you heard the door to his room shut, you went to your own room to get ready for the day. Training continued as normal. The mission was in two weeks. Even though everyone was continuing about everything as normal, they were dreading it. Everyone decided to go get dinner together after training. You sat between Jake and Bradley, and Nat sat across from you. The food was great. Almost every conversation blurred together at the table, but there were parts of a few that you could make out. Payback was talking to Hangman about a sports team, Phoenix and Rooster were discussing different types of music and what they liked.

This dinner was great, it was so normal, relaxing even. The waitress came over and asked how the check would be split, but you said you’d cover it. All of the pilots thanked you, and everyone went their separate ways. The drive back to your house was peaceful, just what you needed after a long day.

Jake hadn’t started his drive back to her place yet. Instead he sat in his truck with Bradley in the passenger seat. “How are things going between the two of you?”

“Not bad, not great. I still have no idea how to tell her that I like her.”

“Well you better tell her before she goes on that mission.”

“We don’t even know who’s going on that mission yet, and if I can help it, it’s not going to be her.” His tone was defensive.

“We all know who’s going, on that mission. She’s the best choice I know it, Mav knows it, and you know it.”

Jake knew that he was right, but he didn’t want to believe it. “What if she doesn’t feel the same way about me? What am I gonna do if she feels the same way about me, and then she’s just gone forever?”

“You don’t want to tell her because you’re scared of losing her?”

Jake didn’t say anything, he just rested his hands on the top of the steering wheel.

“Think about it, I’ll see you tomorrow.” With that Bradley got out of the truck.

Chapter 3

You could hear Jake slide the key you’d lended him into the lock. He walked into the living room where you were sitting.

“Hey, about this morning, sorry for snappin’ at you.”

“Don’t worry about it, I just wanted you to know that I’m here for you.” he said before heading to his room.

You and Jake continued to get to know each other better over the next week. Training took up most of the day, but before and after the two of you talked about music, tv shows, and life experiences. Things were good, you hadn’t had any more nightmares, and the two of you had a lot in common. Jake enjoyed much of the same classic rock that you did, you both loved flying, and you both loved a good competition. He told you about why he’d joined the Navy, and then you told him why you’d joined. You recounted the missions you’d been on together, and what you’d been thinking while flying them. There was only a week until the mission, and only four days of training remained. The whole thing still didn’t feel real. Three weeks ago you were still in Afghanistan and still thought that Jake Seresin hated you. Now you knew he didn’t, but it was all going to end.

Today would be more practice for the bombing part of your mission. It is imperative that the bomb is dropped on the main gas supply for the plant, then the lines that ran throughout would do the rest of the work. That combined with the munitions being produced there should make sure that the plant was inoperable for the foreseeable future. The bombing practice runs were solo, and the other pilots watched from afar on the ground. Eventually everyone was able to make the drop, and it boosted everyone’s confidence in the success of the main goal of the mission.

Maverick approached you in the instruction room after training. “Devil, Admiral Kazansky has asked to see you in his office, don’t keep him waiting.”

“Yes sir.” Everyone looked at you as you left, and Rooster wished you luck.

You made your way into the Admiral’s office, and you greeted each other before he asked you to have a seat.

“Devil, it’s been a while since I saw you last, how are you doing?”

“Better since the last time we spoke.”

“Good, I wanted to talk to you and see how you were doing before the mission. Do you think you’re ready for it?”

“I have no doubt in my ability to complete the main objective of this mission.”

“I’m not questioning your ability to fly the mission, I want to know how you’re feeling about going back to Afghanistan and possibly ending up in the same situation you were in before.”

He was the only one who knew the full extent of what happened while you were over there. You were silent for a few moments, and your index finger rubbed against the back of your thumb.

“Well, honestly I hate the idea of being held captive again, but I don’t think that’s gonna be a problem this time. I’m a good pilot, I can get the mission done, and I don’t have to watch another one of my friends die. This is my job, my life, and I’m prepared to lose my life for this job, I always have been.”

The admiral just nodded. “Somehow I knew you’d say something like that. Maverick came to see me after the conversation he had with you last week.”

“Of course he did.”

“I didn’t tell him anything, only that you should be good to go on the mission, just do me a favor and try your best to make it back alive.”

“I’ll give it my best shot, sir.”

“Alright then, you’re dismissed.”

The next three days were full of more practice for the mission. Now that all of the training and practice was complete, there would be an official assignment for who would fly the mission.

“Are you ready for this?” Jake asked as he got out of your car.

“Yeah, are you?”

“Sure am.” He said with a sigh.

They walked into the hangar where everyone else was beginning to gather. Everyone was silent. The reality of the mission had been sinking in over the past two weeks, but now everyone had to face it head on. Maverick entered after a few minutes and began by giving a rundown of the mission again.

“All of you have shown great skill when training for this mission but as you know only one of you will be able to go.“

He paused, not eager to send someone on a suicide mission. Your eyes met Jake’s for a split second before Maverick continued to speak.

“Devil, you will be the pilot for this mission. Hangman I want you to fly out to Afghanistan as a reserve. Report back here on Monday at 6 AM. Take tomorrow to yourselves. The rest of you will have a new assignment by the end of the week. You’re all dismissed.”

Rooster, Hangman, Phoenix, and Payback gathered around you. Nobody knew what to say.

“Drinks at my place tonight y’all.” You smiled.

If you didn’t try to lighten the mood you’d break. You couldn’t break. The only thing you wanted to do was spend time with the people you cared about.

On the way back to your place you picked up a couple of packs of beer. Everyone arrived around 7 and hung out on the back patio near the pool. You, Rooster, and Phoenix eventually ended up in the pool. In spite of the circumstances, you were having a great time. You noticed Jake’s eyes look over your now bikini clad frame, it was safe to say that you were flattered.

“Hop in, the water’s great.” You said with a smile.

Jake just smiled back while shaking his head no.

Her friends were trying to stay positive for her sake, but the thought of losing her was getting to them. It was a stomach churning type of guilt and fear, and there was nothing they could do to stop it.

Eventually the air became chilly and the gathering moved inside. She was sitting beside Jake on the couch, still wrapped in a towel while drinking her beer. Jake hadn’t said much. He had been stealing admiring glances all night, just enjoying her presence while he still could. She took notice of his atypical behavior, but knew that it was because of the upcoming mission.

The rest of the night was spent sharing stories about your life, and favorite memories with your friends. As the night ended everything was bittersweet. This was the last time you’d all be together.

Payback wished you luck before he left.

Nat pulled you into a hug for what felt like an eternity. “Good luck Spence, I’m gonna miss you. You’re my best friend, always will be.”

“I’m gonna miss you too.” Your words were paired with a sad smile.

Bradley gave you a hug as well, “Carly, thank you for being such a good friend to me. If there’s anyone that can make it back from this, it’s you.” He gave you one last hug before heading out the door.

You showered and put on some comfy clothes before you returned to the living room where Jake still sat.

“That was a nice get together.” After he spoke the two of you sat on the couch for a while, surrounded by heavy silence.

“Jake, you’ve done a really good job of keeping my secret so far, and I need you to keep the rest of it for me, at least until I’m gone.”

You just needed it off of your chest, you couldn’t die feeling like you’d forever mislead the people you cared about most. They deserved to know the truth no matter how bad it was.

“I can do that.” Jakes brows tilted together in concentration and his eyes met yours.

You’d been contemplating telling him this over the past week, it seemed like he genuinely cared about you and wanted to help. Admittedly it was still terrifying, but if there were negative consequences, you wouldn’t have to deal with them for long.

“It started out as a standard bombing mission. Three other pilots and I were targeting a small military storage facility near Bagram, and we started taking fire from enemy jets and SAMs. We had no indication that SAMs were positioned there and they took out two of our jets almost immediately. There were two SAM sites and five enemy planes, god only knows how many anti aircraft guns were firing at us. My wingman and I-,” you were already struggling to catch your breath.

“We had taken damage from the anti aircraft rounds, and were still in a dogfight with these other planes, my wingman split off to take care of the SAM sites and succeeded, but he got shot down before he could target any of the jets. I took out two jets, but with the damage to the plane it was getting harder to hold them off. I did everything I could, but it still wasn’t enough. I took another hit, and both of my engines failed, there was no way I was gonna recover, so I ejected. That was probably the worst decision I’ve ever made. Really, I should’ve stayed with that plane til’ it hit the fuckin’ ground.”

Tears were silently rolling down your face now and you didn’t have the energy to care whether Jake was judging you or not. Nothing really mattered anymore.

Her last statement broke his heart. He knew that what she went through was bad, but if in hindsight death was preferable, it had to be truly horrible. She was crying and rightfully so. He had worried earlier when she was gasping for breath, but she seemed to be breathing a little easier now. She’d lost three of her wingmen already and it seemed like the horror was just beginning. There wasn’t anything he could say, he just needed to continue to listen.

“As soon as my feet hit the ground I was being shot at. I think I landed on the outskirts of a small military training camp. Between shots I ran to cover behind some crates, but it didn’t take them long to surround me. I thought they were gonna kill me, but they just threw me in a truck and we drove for a little bit. When they took me out of the truck I could tell that we were at a bigger military complex. They put me in a cell, tied me to a chair, and started questioning me. Wanted to know what my mission was, why I was flying there. They started by hitting me, first with their hands, then with various tools they had lying around. I still wasn’t giving them anything, so they tried electrical shock, and lemme tell you that shit hurts. Then they tried drowning. They kept at it for five days. That last day they were hitting me with a baseball bat, and ended up knocking my chair over. I slipped my legs out of their restraints when they left for a break. With my legs out I went over to their table of tools and got my hands free. I used that knife to take out the guard at the end of the hall, I killed him.”

Her voice had become almost a whisper, and then she was silent. She couldn’t even look at him.

“You did what you had to do to survive. Anyone would have done the same if they were in your situation.” He said while reaching over to grasp her hand.

A safe, grounding, comforting gesture. It put her more at ease.

She continued after an extended pause,“That morning that I was up early and said I couldn’t sleep, I had a nightmare about that last day.”

“Do you have those a lot?”

“Not anymore.” There was another long pause before she spoke again.

“I took a handgun off of the guard, and ended up finding the two guys that had been beating on me all week. I shot both of them. When I got outside I could see the fence surrounding the base, and in the distance I could see the buildings of the city. I made a run for the fence and climbed over, the barbed wire at the top tore me up pretty bad, but I kept running. God I hurt so bad. Every fucking part of me hurt.” She squeezed her eyes shut, and took her hand from Jake’s, wiping away more tears from her face and neck, before digging her fingernails into her palm.

She was shivering, like she was terrified that the words she said would come true again right now.

He carefully moved closer to where she was sitting on the couch and put his hand on her upper back. To her the feeling of warmth and pressure on her back kept her from spiraling into a place she hadn’t been in a long time.

“There was an abandoned building on the outskirts of the city that I ducked into. I needed to patch myself up real bad. Thank god they hadn’t found the sewing kit I keep on me for emergencies. I slept there that night, and started moving again in the morning. Every once in a while there would be groups of Afghani soldiers that I had to avoid. About four days later three of them came into the building I was hiding in. There was a firefight. I took out one of them before my rifle ran out of ammo and was trying to get away when I got hit by a couple of bullets.”

Her fingers gently touched a scar on her leg, and then found their way to her shoulder.

“One went through my shoulder and the other went right through my thigh. I dragged myself into the buildings stairwell and shot them from there. They were wearing combat gear so I took some of that, their food, another gun, ammo, and their medical supplies. I wouldn’t have survived if I hadn’t gotten that stuff. And with my leg being injured it took me a lot longer to get where I needed to go. I traveled less in that last week than I had in the first four days. Finally I made it to a US Army outpost and they took me back to my base. That was six months ago. I had to stay in the hospital for a month, took another two to get back to flying the way I was. Now I’m here.”

She had stopped crying at this point, but looked over at Jake to find silent tears rolling off of his jaw. He still had his hand on her back

Everything was piecing itself together. She didn’t want to be seen as a bad person for what she did over there, even if what she did was just so she could survive. She wanted to be the pilot to go on this mission so that none of then people she cared about had to. She had the experience. She was right for the job, but he hated it. He hated that she had to go back and risk going through the same thing again. He wished that he could trade places with her for just a moment, so that she would have a break from all that was weighing on her.

Against what his mind was telling him, he slowly pulled her into a hug. He didn’t care what she thought of him right now, it was what he needed to do.

“I’m glad that you ejected and fought your way back, because if you hadn’t, I wouldn’t have gotten to know how great of a person you really are. You’re a brilliant pilot, and a wonderful person, and I’m sorry for how I acted towards you in the past. You didn’t deserve it, and you didn’t deserve any of what happened to you over there either. If anyone else knew about it, they wouldn’t blame you for it. Hell I don’t. It was what you had to do to stay alive.”

He was glad that she was alive, and he was very glad to have gotten to apologize for how he acted in the past.

“I thought you’d hate me.” she confessed.

She was crying again. Her face was buried in his shoulder, and her tears soaked into the fabric of his shirt. It felt like a weight had been lifted off of her chest. He didn’t hate her for what she did, and was glad that she was still here. His hand rubbed her upper back, and she began to speak again.

“I’m so sorry,” she gently pulled out of his touch.

“You’ve got nothing to be sorry for.”

She was still somewhat embarrassed of how emotional she had gotten, but he was nothing but kind and genuine. That’s the Jake she liked, maybe even loved. Most people only saw the cocky and arrogant side of him, but under that demeanor was a caring person, and she was very thankful for that.

“Are you scared that it’s gonna happen again?” His hand moved to hold hers once again.

“Yeah I am.”

Chapter 4

The next morning Carly went to meet with her lawyer and make sure her will was in place and her funeral arrangements were ready. She also went for a long drive. She went up into the mountains and then headed back down and along the coast. By the time she got back home it was dark. Jake was in the living room and greeted her when she came in. Her bag was mainly packed, but she threw a few extra things into the pockets of her flight suit. Just in case.

Jake drove them to the base the next morning, and by 6 AM they were with Maverick on a plane to Afghanistan. They landed at the base several hours later. The soldiers showed them to a room with a couple of beds, and then took Maverick to meet with their commander. She was due to start her mission in a few hours, so she headed out to the tarmac to find her jet. Jake wasn’t far behind her, he was a reserve after all. They spotted Maverick talking to the commander beside a couple of F-18 Super Hornets. The two pilots completed their pre-flight inspections, and were briefed on the mission one last time. There was only an hour until she’d take off now.

Maverick wished you good luck, and gave you a hug before heading to the command room. You approached Jake briskly and took his hand, pressing something into his palm. He looked at what you’d given him, it was the key to your Porsche.

“No Carly, I can’t.”

“Over my dead body.” Those were her words when he’d asked to drive it.

“I want you to have it, drive it for me okay?”

He just nodded.

“Thank you again for listening to me the other night. You’re a great guy Jake. That girl of yours is gonna be lucky to have you.”

“It’s you.” His voice was barely audible, but you’d heard him.

“What?” You needed to make sure your mind wasn’t playing tricks on you.

“It’s you. You’re that girl, Carly. I’ve liked you since we met, but honestly I was afraid to tell you, and I didn’t want to ruin things when we started getting along.”

You couldn’t move for a moment. He liked you too. This whole damn time he liked you too.

“Jake I’ve liked you for a long time too, I wish we would’ve told each other sooner.”

You took a step toward him, and he took one toward you. In an instant your hand was on the back of his neck, and his hands were wrapped around your waist.

Their lips came together carefully, but lovingly. Tears were streaming down both of their faces, mixing together as they moved with one another. They pulled apart so that they could breathe, but stayed in each other’s arms.

“Devil, time to go!” one of the soldiers informed you.

“Im sorry we never got to be together.” She looked up at him with tear filled eyes.

“Devil! You gotta go! Now!” The soldier yelled again. Before Jake could say anything else, she let go of his hands, and in an instant she was gone. He watched as her plane took off, and a pit formed in his stomach.

Maverick had seen their interaction from the windows of the command room. All he could do was hope that by some miracle she made it back. Jake climbed into the spare jet, and even though he was trying to hide it, he still looked very upset. Her radio transmissions could be heard throughout the command room and in Jake’s ear. There was no way to see her position, satellites weren’t in place and she would be out of radar range.

“Target is in sight, I’ve got two bandits, 10 miles south of my position. Ground defense has engaged. Target acquired, bombs away. Direct hit!”

Her comms were quiet for a moment, “Smoke in the air! Deploying flares, I’m comin’ around. Splash one! Dammit, I’ve got five more bandits, coming from the west and east-” Her radio suddenly went dead.

One of the officers came over the radio, “Her radio isn’t coming back online. We lost her.”

Jake couldn’t breathe. She was gone. She was really gone.

“Fuck,” he slammed his fist against his thigh.

“Hangman, it’s over, she completed the mission, we’re done here.” Mavericks voice strained over the radio.

There was nothing he could do. A few more minutes passed. Still nothing.

He climbed out of the jet. Once his feet hit the ground he didn’t know what to do. To say he was distraught was an understatement. If he had just told her sooner. If he had been a better pilot she wouldn’t have gone at all. If he had told her how he felt earlier, maybe things would have been different.

Jake went back to the room with your things it. He laid down on his bed and just looked at the ceiling. A clock on the wall was ticking, almost like it was teasing him. Twenty minutes ago they had shared a kiss, and now they never would again. What could’ve been was running through his head. They could’ve gotten married, had a family, shared holidays and anniversaries together. He could’ve told her he loved her.

Another ten minutes passed and Maverick entered the room. “I’m sorry it had to be her.”

Jake didn’t say a word to him. It wasn’t Mavericks fault, but he had no one else to blame. Jake shut his eyes, laid his forearm across them, and tried to find any sort of peace. He didn’t know how long he laid there before the door to the room opened again.

Jake didn’t even open his still teary eyes before his voice strained, “Maverick I swear to god-”

“Jake? Are you okay?”

He immediately sat up, almost not believing what he heard. There she was, in the doorway, looking straight at him. They met in an embrace in the middle of the room. Clinging to each other as if their lives depended on it.

“I thought you- I thought you were gone.” he let out a shaky breath.

“I’m right here, everything’s okay, we’re okay.” She smiled up at him, the most genuine smile he’d ever seen.

The two of them sat down on the bed, and she rested her head on his shoulder. They stayed like that for a while, just delighted in the presence of one another.

The door to the room opened again, and this time it was actually Maverick.

“Hey you two, there’s a flight back to the states leaving in an hour. Let’s go home. Oh and Carly, it’s good to have you back.” He smiled sincerely at them before making his way back down the hall.

Carly slept on Jake’s shoulder almost the whole flight back, making the trip feel significantly shorter. They arrived back in San Diego at around midnight. She suggested going to the Hard Deck for a celebratory drink, even though it would be dead on a Wednesday night. They noticed Rooster’s Bronco when they pulled into the parking lot. He’d be glad to see both of them. When they got inside they noticed Rooster sitting at the bar, along with Phoenix.

They had their backs to the door and hadn’t noticed that you or Jake had come in. You walked up behind them, Penny noticed, but didn’t say anything.

“Hope y’all poured one out for me,” you said as you laid a hand on each of their shoulders.

“Holy shit!” Rooster slid off of the bar stool to hug you.

“Oh my god!” Phoenix exclaimed. She also got up and hugged you. You stepped back towards Jake, and his arm quickly found its way back around your waist.

“No fucking way.” Nat just stared at where Jake’s hand was resting on your waist.

Rooster started laughing, “Yes way, glad you finally told her, man.” He smiled at Jake, and then at Phoenix, “That could be us y’know.”

“Keep dreaming Bradshaw.”

The four of you decided to play some pool, and eventually Maverick came in to see Penny.

“So how the hell did you guys end up like, well, like that…” Phoenix trailed off as she gestured to the two pilots, who were standing closely together beside the pool table.

“Turns out we had both liked each other for a while, but I told her how I felt right before she went on the mission.” Jake said as he moved his hand to rest on her lower back.

“The timing was really bad, but I’ve never had someone happier to see me walk into a room than he was.” She smiled while looking up at him.

The game of pool was long over and Maverick came to stand beside the table with the rest of you. “So Devil, what happened after we lost you on the radio?”

“Well the ground defense got a good hit on me after I took down the first jet, that’s when the comms went out. Pretty quickly, I took care of another. Five more were coming in fast from the east and west. The group from the east got to me first, two I shot down, one had to punch out. The two from the west arrived and I led them into the mountains. My jet took a good amount of damage, and I was almost out of ammo. I got some good hits on one and he bugged out pretty quick. The last one I couldn’t get off my tail, so I pulled up and turned hard right through a break in the mountains and then descended on the other side of this ridge. By the time he followed I was ready to take the shot. I’m just so glad I was able to make it back.”

“I think everyone else is glad you were able to make it back too.” Maverick smiled as he looked at the other pilots around you.

Jake carried their bags into the house. They were both exhausted from everything that had happened in the past two days, but they were ecstatic to be together. Jake sat her bag down behind the couch, just like he had a few weeks ago, and then started to carry his own to the guest room.

“You don’t have to sleep in there if you don’t want to,” she smirked.

He followed her into her room and they both settled under the covers. Jake had his arm around her shoulders and ran his fingers through her hair as she rested her head on his chest. She could hear his heart beating and feel every breath he took.

“I love this. I love this so damn much.” She grabbed his hand, pulling it close to her chest.

“I love you.” The words escaped his lips before he could stop them.

It was probably too soon, but it was how he felt, and there was nothing he could do about it now.

“I love you too.” She didn’t miss a beat.

Their lips came together once again, moving in perfect harmony.

He still couldn’t believe that they were together, but he was loving every second of it. Just having her close to him was incredible. They eventually fell asleep in each others arms, and woke up the same way.

“I could stay here like this for the rest of our lives,” her voice was tired.

“As much as I’d love to do that, Maverick wants us to be at the base by 9, we’re supposed to get our new assignments today.” He said as they sat up against the headboard.

With an exaggerated groan she rolled out of bed; Jake wasn’t far behind her. They stood in front of the sinks in the bathroom, and he watched as she carefully applied her mascara. She watched as he ran a comb through his hair, making it more neat than it had been when they woke up. They just admired each other’s motions, how each one was intentional.

“What do you want for breakfast?” Jake asked as he did up the last button on his uniform.

“Fruit maybe? I’m not really that hungry right now.” She seemed distracted, almost nervous.

“Everything okay?” He looked at her, brows furrowed in concern.

“All good.” Her eyes stayed put on the concealer in her hand.

Jake went into the kitchen and started laying out things for breakfast. He made a few slices of toast, and cut them into triangles like his mom used to. He put some honey and butter on top and got the blackberries, raspberries and strawberries out of the fridge. By the time he had everything on the plates Carly had come into the kitchen.

“Thanks for making breakfast, it’s really good.”

To his surprise she had cleared her plate.

“You’re welcome, but I didn’t really cook anything.” He laughed and took their plates and laid them in the sink.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He said as he leaned up against the island across from her.

“I’m worried about our new assignments, but it’s stupid cause I’ve never been worried about it before.”

Before she had even finished her sentence Jake was at her side, wrapping a comforting arm around her shoulders.

“Why are you worried?”

“It might keep us apart, hell, we might not see each other again, I just-” Her rambling was cut short by a gentle kiss.

Her arms reached up around his neck, pulling him closer to her.

“We’re gonna be just fine, everything is gonna work out one way or another. I promise.” his voice was ever reassuring.

When they arrived at the base Maverick was there along with Admiral Kazansky. They sat down with the other pilots who had been a part of training for the mission.

Admiral Kazansky spoke first, congratulating you on the success of the mission and then handed it over to Mav to give the new assignments. He went down the aisle, handing each pilot a file with their name on it. Everyone got one except you. Jake opened his file and his eyes darted across the page.

“Where’s yours?” He whispered

“I don’t know.” You whispered back.

The other pilots had begun to look at their own files before Admiral Kazansky commanded their attention again.

“Due to the nature of this previous mission and the exemplary skill needed to complete it, the United States Navy has decided to promote Lieutenant Carly Spencer to the rank of Lieutenant Commander.”

When he finished speaking he walked over to you with your file.

After the briefing was over the two of you stood outside the meeting room, as did the other pilots. Mav and Ice were also talking and catching up. Everyone was discussing where they were going. Technically a new assignment wasn’t classified information.

“Congratulations on the promotion.” He smiled at you, and then continued, “Where are they sending you?”

“I don’t want to look. Where are you going?”

Jake held out his hand, silently asking for your file.

You handed it over to him with a huff.

The corners of his mouth tilted up, “Pensacola, Florida. You wanna know where you’re going?”

“Just get it over with.” She huffed.

He opened your file, eyes scanning it for the location, and when he saw it there was a clear look of shock on his face.

“Hon you’re gonna lose your mind.” There was a hint of disbelief in his voice.

You quickly stepped over beside him, and found the location listed in the file.

Pensacola, Florida

“Oh my god, this is amazing” You playfully hit his arm with the back of your hand. Your smile was beaming. It felt like a hundred pound weight had been lifted off your chest.

“See, I told you everything would work out.” His arm moved around your shoulders, pulling you in close.

“I’m so glad it did.”

Thanks so much for reading! I’d like to write more for Jake and Carly so if you have any suggestions please send me a message or let me know in the comments! 💕

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pollyna · 6 months ago

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Hangster prompt that could go two ways when Jake, exasperated, tired, a little drunk and a little heartbroken, asks Bradley - in front of everyone and Penny, during one of their nights out at the Hard Deck - what he knows about:

Prompt A: unrequited love and Bradley answers with the description of two men looking at each other from the opposite side of a piano, while a kid tries to learn a new melody, telling each other they are in love for then never talking about it again just for the love to find space in every aspect of their life but never ever in the way it was supposed to.

Prompt B: love. What the hell does it know about love. Just for Bradley to stop in the middle of a sentence to look up at Jake, smiling softly and asking him if he's really ready to hear all that Bradley does know about love, and if he has a little more time to spear, he could tell Jake what he doesn't know about it.

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whohasthecards · 1 year ago

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What if Hangman has a shitty family, right? Sure, he had a relatively happy childhood, but they weren't happy with his career choices.

A day before an important mission, he visits them. Hangs around with his mom, messes with his siblings, plays with his nephews and nieces, and even talks to his dad a bit.

His dad got pissed though, and asked him why the hell is he crawling back.

Hangman was tense before he simply said that he wanted to spend some time with them. He left a bit after that, his dad scoffing at his son's typical behavior.

Hangman gets shot down on the mission.

When James Seresin opens the door, it's to two Naval officers in dress uniform. A Pete "Maverick" Mitchell and a Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw, with grim expressions asking if they can come in, and if Jake's sister is here.

James, his wife, his daughter, and his son, all sit on the sofa, as the two men explain that Lieutenant Jacob "Hangman" Seresin was shot down in active combat, no parachute, no possible chance of rescue, no body, declared missing in action, presumed dead. They are sorry for their loss.

"The kid was a good man, a good friend, if only I had more time," Mitchell would say evenly. "You're lucky to have had Hang-- Jake as a son."

"He talked about you guys, a lot," Bradshaw would say softly.

James couldn't believe it, he just saw his son a few days ago, right?

#fanfic #top gun #top gun fandom #top gun maverick #jake hangman seresin #jake seresin #pete maverick mitchell #bradley rooster bradshaw #bradley bradshaw #angst #hurt/comfort #hangman is alive and trying to get back #he's cussing and in pain #but he's coming back goddammit #just gonna take him a bit #comes back and everyone is looking at him in shock #Hangman looks like shit and is disgruntled and just pushes past them looking for food #dunno why I wrote this just wanted to

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crooked-jes · 7 months ago

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Jake’s warm like a lifeline and bright like a lighthouse, and Bradley knows it’s unfair to steal his warmth, put his clumsy hands on Jake’s waist and tug. Yet, he can’t help being selfish this once, just like he couldn’t help it the last time and the time before that.

written for topguntober day 26, prompt {rain kiss} :)

#hangster #hangster fic #sereshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #jake hangman seresin #jake seresin x bradley bradshaw #top gun maverick #tgm #top gun #fanfiction #rain kiss #kissing in the rain #topguntober #angst #hurt/comfort #whump

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texasteaparty · 17 days ago

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My hangster headcanon is Jake and Bradley (and Maverick) do a tribute bonfire for Goose and Carole and Jake whips out a guitar and starts singing Watching You by Rodney Atkins and the lyrics make Rooster break down and cry but like a catharsis level sob y'know

Excuse me while I cry

#hangster #jake seresin #jake hangman seresin #top gun hangman #bradley bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster top gun #hurt/comfort #grief #headcanon

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sarahsmi13s · 1 year ago

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Two Ladders

pairing: jake ‘hangman’ seresin x sarah grant (fem!oc)

characters: sarah grant, jake seresin

warnings: language, pregnancy, pregnancy hormones, crying, loss of appetite, hiding feelings from significant others, light mentions of jake's PTSD, mentions of throwing up, all from jake's p.o.v, family issues, if i missed any let me know

word count: ~2.2k

a/n: this story is inspired by ‘His Little Girl’ (bradley bradshaw x reader) by the lovely @roosterscockpit ( @milesdickpic ) also, yes, the oc is based on me lol (well a fantasy version lol) this is heavily inspired by my own feelings towards my actual brother and sister not getting along very well and the worries sarah has here are worries i've actually had when it concerns this topic

this is a backstory piece! you can find the other parts to j and s -> here

summary: jake notices a change in his fiance's behavior. at first he thinks it's caused by the pregnancy and sarah's hormones being out of wack. but when he comes home to find her crying on their bed does he finally voice his concerns and lets her vent to him.

When Jake first noticed something was wrong with Sarah, he thought it was just her pregnancy hormones making her a little emotional. He’d catch her crying or appearing a little out of focus, but she was an emotionally sensitive person, so he attributed it all to that and her hormones.

Of course, he still held her when he found her crying, he’s her comforter, and he took that job very seriously. He knew her tears could be nothing, a result of simply reading something or seeing a video. Maybe she just needed his shoulder to cry on, and he was happy to provide it. If she wanted to talk about it, he was there to listen, and if she just wanted to curl in his lap, that was fine too.

If it was something really really bothering her, he hoped she knew she could come to him about it.

He noticed that her appetite seemed to be shot too. She usually jumped at the chance to have him make one of his mother’s enchilada recipes, but she just shook her head and said a burger would be enough and then she only ate half.

But again, Jake blamed that on the pregnancy too. Sarah had morning sickness and was sick throughout the day, especially if something disagreed with her. So he thought that she was just trying not to irritate her stomach and never commented on it.

But he made note of it all.

Jake was making sure not a thing went unnoticed. Because nothing can turn out to be something…

Jake sighed as he got in his truck, inhaling the perfume he sprayed on the back of his hand. Storms were rolling in, and he could feel the anxiety peaking in his chest, but the familiar all encompassing smell of his fiancèe helped keep him calm as he prepared himself to go home.

Before he started out of the parking lot, he pulled his phone out and sent Sarah a text. She was working right now, but she would text him back since it was her free hour, so she wasn’t doing much other than planning or putting grades in.

After sending the text, he pulled up his playlist and started it before putting his phone face down and leaving the parking lot to go straight home.

When Jake parked in their driveway, he noticed Sarah’s vehicle also in the driveway.

Tilting his head, Jake checked his phone. Had she called him earlier in the day to let him know that she was going to be home and he just didn’t realize? No.... and she hadn’t responded to his text from earlier either.

Jake took a deep breath and got out of his truck, grabbed his things and went inside.

He was trying to rationalize it in his head, telling himself that she was okay and that the babies were okay. He needed to tell himself that, or he would spiral with the storm brewing above him.

Maybe the morning sickness was too much, and she didn’t want to stay at the school and “power through it” like she normally tried to. She came home to rest and was actually asleep when he sent that message, and she’s still asleep.

But she was okay, everything was okay.

Jake took a deep breath and went to the kitchen to get two bottles of water before going upstairs to the bedroom.

When he opened the door, he found Sarah on her side of the bed with her back to the door and curled up with a half-drunk bottle of water on her nightstand. At first, it appeared to be like she was just sleeping, so Jake decided to quietly just change into his sweatpants and get in bed next to her and try to sleep as well.

He wasn’t about to wake her up just because he wanted to be held. Sarah needed her rest, and just being next to her would help ease the anxiety the storm was riling up in him.

But as he slipped his shirt off, tossing it on the pile of khakis that he made a note of to fold later, he thought he heard a sniffle come from the bed.

He furrowed his brow but just slipped the black sweats on before turning to join her on the bed.

As he stepped towards the bed, he watched her subtly try to wipe her face as she sniffled. But when she cut off her own sob with her hand and buried her face in her pillow, his heart dropped.

He immediately rounded the bed to her side and knelt down, “Hey, hey, what’s wrong?” Sarah kept her head down, buried in the pillow, muffling her cries as Jake watched her chest jerk with sobs. He frowned and reached up to gently push her hair out of her face, “Sugar… please, talk to me, what’s going on?”

Sarah unburied half of her face, and Jake’s thumb is quick to wipe the tears slipping down her cheek, “What are you doing home?” He frowned a little at her attempt to change the subject, but he sighed softly and answered her. “Storm grounded us, got to come home early.”

Her head quickly turned to him, her red-rimmed eyes wide.

“Oh my goodness, Jake. I’m so sorry, I forgot about that,” she said, sitting up and wiping her eyes. “Are-are you okay?”

Jake felt his heart break just a little that she was worried more about him than she was about the fact he just caught her crying.

“I’m fine, Sugar. Better now that I’m home.” He reached up and cupped her cheek, “But you’re not fine, what’s going on?”

“It’s nothing, Darlin, just-”

In the middle of her sentence, Sarah’s phone lit up with a notification, and her breath hitched.

Jake eyed her and then looked at her phone seeing that it was an email from one of her players about the practice schedule for the day. Another email dinged right after with her assistant coach's reply.

He placed it face down and looked up at her. “Did something happen at school? Is something going on between teachers that is making you so upset?”

Sarah’s mouth dropped a little, “Wh-what?”

“Sarah… you have been crying nearly everyday. And-and your appetite is completely shot,” he said gently as moved to sit on the bed. “That’s just pregnancy hormones and not wanting to upset my stomach too much…”

Jake nodded before taking her hands in his, his thumb immediately playing with the ring on her finger, “That’s what I thought it was at first. But the fact a notification from your phone made you tense up is telling me that something else is going on. Please, tell me what it is.”

Sarah sniffled, taking in a shaky breath as she tried to collect her thoughts.

“It’s not school related… It’s um… it’s Shawn and Selena,” she said quietly as her voice began to clog with emotion. “S-something happened, and now they’re not talking. And I just… I don’t fucking know Jake…”

Jake immediately wrapped her in a hug, not caring that she was sobbing directly into his ear.

“Shhh shhh, it’s okay, it’s okay.”

He held her until she calmed down, rocking her gently as her tears dripped down his back.

She pulled back first to wipe her eyes, and Jake took the chance to move to the middle of the bed and pull her into his side.

“Talk to me, let it out, honey,” he urged gently.

Sarah took a deep breath before spilling it all to him. Everything weighing on her heart about the whole situation.

And Jake listened, he didn’t interject unless he had a question, and even then, he felt like he needed to wait to say something at all.

“I just – I feel like I’m on two ladders with all of this… One ladder is Shawn, and the other is Selena, and I’m doing the damn splits. I either need to pick a ladder or get off and leave both. But I can’t, Jake… I can not pick, I will not pick.”

She harshly wiped at her eyes, “I just I fucking can’t, Jake… But either way, pick or not pick, I’m gonna hurt someone’s feelings.”

“Are they asking you to pick sides?”

“N-no… I don’t know what happened, I know bits and pieces like I told you… but it’s clear feelings have been hurt, and I feel like it’s gonna come down to me having to pick, and I can’t fucking do that…”

She pulled back from Jake, “And I’m terrified to like or share anything on Facebook from either of them in case it hurts someone’s feelings. I shouldn’t be fucking scared about that, but I am!”

“And,” she continued as more tears gathered on her lash line. “When they weren’t on speaking terms before, they wouldn’t be seen at the same fucking function together. If one was there, the other wasn’t. If one had no idea the other was gonna show up, they would stay until after dinner and then fucking leave.”

Jake felt his heart break as he gently rubbed her back. This was affecting her deeply. It would have affected her like this before the pregnancy, but it was tenfold with the heightened emotions.

“And… fuck, I feel so selfish for feeling like this…” She wiped her eyes again, “I’m afraid that if they aren’t on speaking terms by October, they’re not gonna be at the wedding.”

“Why do you feel selfish for feeling like that?”

“Because Jake, I’m worrying about my own feelings over theirs!” Sarah rubbed her face, frustrated, “I’m worried about how this affects me, this isn’t about me! But just – fuck I feel like such a shitty person…”

Jake’s jaw dropped, “Hey, hey, hold on now.” He pulled her hands away from her face, “You are not a shitty person for having your own feelings about a situation. There is nothing wrong with that. You are not selfish for worrying about whether or not your brother and sister will be at your wedding. You’re not, Sugar.”

He squeezed her hands, “Why didn’t you come to me with this? You know I would have your back…” Sarah sniffled and looked away, “I didn’t want to bother you… I wanted to try and do this all on my own…”

“But you don’t have to… You deserve to know that you have someone to catch you if you fall off those two ladders. That you’ll have someone to go to if you choose to walk away.�� He gently turned her head to look at him as he wiped her tears, “Do you want advice, or do you just want me to hold you?”

She leaned into his hand, “I could really use your advice… I’m so stuck, and I’m so scared…”

Jake nodded, giving her a gentle smile, “I think that what needs to happen is that you just need to step back from them both. Just be honest with them and tell them that you can’t handle this right now. You are allowed to do that. The stress and anxiety is not good for you or the twins. It is affecting you a lot, Sarah… This whole thing is affecting you, you are literally making yourself sick over it.”

Sarah opened her mouth, but he stopped her.

“Your appetite is almost gone, you eat because you know you have to. I don’t think it’s just the food that irritates your stomach anymore. Yes, you’re pregnant, and you’re gonna be throwing up. But your mental well-being affects your physical well-being, and all of the stress and anxiety is making you sick.”

He pushed some hair behind her ear, “If you want to take a few days before saying anything, that’s fine. But I really think you should consider it. I know they’re family, and you love them both, but you have to think of how this is affecting you. Do not hurt yourself in order to please them, that’s not fair to you.”

She pulled back a little to wipe her eyes before looking at her lap. “I just don’t want them to think I’m mad at them… because I’m not mad at them.” Jake nodded and tilted her head up, “I understand that, and I know that you care about everyone so deeply… but you have to put that care into yourself, too.”

She nodded, and he pulled her into a hug, “I love you so much, Sugar. I’ve got your back.” “Thank you, Jake. I love you too.” He smiled and kissed the side of her head before she pulled back and kissed his lips.

Jake chuckled, “Now, I can put on a movie, or we can watch MrBallen and cuddle before I go make dinner. Does that sound okay?” “Ooooh, we need to catch up on MrBallen, let’s do that,” Sarah responded, grinning as she turned to get the remote. “And yes, I had a small lunch before I came home, and I have some spare saltines in the drawer. I’ve eaten today.”

He kissed her head, “Good girl.” She scoffed playfully and layed down next to him, turning on the TV.

After a few minutes, Jake spoke up, “You know, we could also say that your doctor told you to watch your blood pressure–” “Jake, focus on the strange, dark, and mysterious. We can work on it later, okay? I need the distraction.”

He chuckled and nodded, “Yes, ma’am.”

i know this is kind of a random, unprompted J and S piece, but my muse was playing off my deep internal feelings and brought this piece to fruition

never the less, i hope you enjoyed

and i will be getting to the twins arrival and the wedding as soon as i can! i'm just working on other series as well, thank you for being so patient with me! 💜

j and s tags <333: @milesdickpic @roosterscockpit @luckyladycreator2 @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @sebsxphia @mamachasesmayhem @nobody7102 @djs8891 @kmc1989 @marbledaesthetics @fangirlbang @penguin876 @hisredheadedgoddess28 @bellaireland1981 @memeorydotcom @matisse556 @harryigprompt @sky2nd @scarlettwidow19 @showthemwhoyouare-6 @coffeewithcal @whatislovevavy

#j and s #j and s universe #jake and sarah #jake hangman seresin x fem!oc #jake hangman seresin x plus size! fem!oc #jake seresin x fem!oc #jake seresin x sarah grant #jake hangman seresin #hangman top gun #jake seresin angst #hurt/comfort #j and s backstory #jake seresin #i just need quiet #jersey baby #two ladders #sarahsmi13s

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whohasthecards · 2 years ago

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Injured and Alone

Jake ejects on a mission for a different deployment and gets injured, and since he's on assignment and his emergency contact is his immediate CO, Mav/Dagger Squad doesnt find out and stuff, and so they lose contact with him for a couple weeks as he recovers and Mav starts to get worried but hangman comes back in contact when Mav said he would do something abt it and he scolds hangman a bit but lets it go and hangman feels smad because Mav or the daggers didn't notice he was gone, the daggers didnt notice he was gone, and they didnt really care and he still has injuries and eventually he still hangs out but with walls, but then Ice founds out in one of the mission reports and mentions it to Mav like how's Jake, is his injuries gone? And Mav is like stitches!????? And goes on to dad Jake.

The stuff I wrote below is like a word vomit mess, I kinda want to add more to it, but here is what I have for now.

---

Jake muttered a curse as he hid behind the trees. His comms were not working properly. He could barely hear anything, and he was pretty sure the enemy was able to get into the comms.

He was stuck on enemy territory, he was grounded, no plane, lacking supplies, he had to get out. He had to march to the nearest base or else he was done for.

He turned on his comms for one last message, “This is Hangman, I’m going dark.” Afterwards he crushed the comms and left covered in dirt as he marched forward.

—

It took days. He fought through the wilderness. Hid from enemy patrol. Eliminated–, fought against other soldiers.

There was so much blood.

—

He woke up to the sound of machines beeping around him, the smell of antiseptic in the air, and the feeling of a dry-fucking throat.

What does a guy gotta do to get some water around here?

He opened up his eyes and saw a button by his bed and slowly inched his hand forward to grab and press it. His limbs felt so heavy, must be the good meds.

But hey, at least he wasn’t handcuffed to the bed. That’s a good sign, right? Meant he wasn’t being a complete incoherent shit head, or that he wasn’t in the enemy’s hands.

Yay, progress.

—

“-- The Navy thanks you for your service Lieutenant Seresin,” Jake snapped back to attention as his current CO filled him in on what happened. The older man was just droning on and on, but his limbs still felt heavy and there was a constant ache in his body. At least he could still lay in his hospital bed. “We’ll do a debrief once you're discharged. However, there is one more thing before I leave, Lieutenant.” The admiral paused as if choosing his words carefully. “It is stated in your file that your emergency contact would automatically be your current CO, which is me at the moment, is there anyone you would like me to contact, son?”

Jake paused and thought back to his last posting with the Dagger Squad. How they started having group hangouts, meals, and sleepovers during their break, continued whenever one or more of them were on leave and hanging around Miramar. He thought about how he had to drag himself up to his apartment and clean his wounds, how that would take forever, and how nice it would be to have someone– No. Most of the Daggers were on deployment last time he checked, the ones who were on leave didn’t deserve to have to deal with him. Mav is a permanent instructor in Top Gun, now, they won’t have time for him.

They were all he had and they deserved better.

“No, sir.”

—

It took more than a week to get himself settled in on his dingy base housing. He was at medical, flew stateside, medical again, and all that fun stuff.

He sighed as he laid down on his freshly made bed. Everything ached, his stitches felt like they were being pulled apart, and he was pretty sure he had a headache coming in. Wonderful.

He decided to open his phone to see what he missed.

He wondered if anyone messaged him.

Not really. It seems like it’s been more than a week since someone actually messaged him. And when they did it was to respond to something he sent to them. The Daggers group chat was going strong though.

He shouldn’t be surprised, they don’t even know the mission he’s been through. They don’t even know he’s back on the west coast.

But by god did it hurt that not even one of them bothered to send something in his more than 2 weeks of radio silence.

(He knew he was being irrational, they were all adults with busy lives. Hell, one of them could have been through something like he just went through and he and the others wouldn’t know. Right?)

—

He hissed as he disinfected his stitches and wounds, slowly wrapping them up in bandages. It’s okay, he’d be faster at doing this in a couple of days.

—

He felt his stomach rumble as he stared at the boiling pot of pasta. He forgot to cook earlier, well he was too tired too, and his stomach was paying for it. Maybe he should have just shelled out money for that pizza. Heck, he forgot to buy some kind of fucking sauce for the damn thing.

He’s usually too stingy to Doordash shit, but with how fatigued he felt every time he had to move, he was considering ordering groceries to be delivered at his front step.

—

While he was curled up in bed, everything was aching, his head feeling light. He felt his phone ping and he opened up the Dagger’s groupchat seeing the group talk about something so fucking stupid.

He couldn’t help himself.

He roasted the shit out of them.

His phone was bombarded with notifications as his squad digitally squawked back in offense.

He smiled and put his phone down, for a minute he felt normal.

—

He wasn’t physically cleared for active duty, or to fly yet. He had to go through PT, training, counseling, evaluations, bla bla bla, the whole nine yards.

It was a pain, he missed being behind a stick. Missed being fast and bursting through the clouds and just watching the sky change colors.

Instead, he had to keep his feet on the ground as he went through fucking paperwork at Top Gun.

He gets surrounded by cocky-ass rookies, but he can’t school them.

It was horrible.

He looked up when he heard a knock at his door. “Hey, kid, heard we got a new Lieutenant coming to assist on base, didn’t think it was you, buddy,” Mav said smiling gently from where he leaned on Hangman’s door frame. “When did you get here?”

Hangman smirked back on the older man, slowly leaning back on his chair as he hid a wince from his stitches pulling. “Today's my third first day back at Top Gun, pops, just doing some paperwork.”

“Surprised you’re not out there flying, scared to lose to these rookies,” Mav teased sitting in front of his desk.

“Please Mav, I’m not like you, I’m here to be a good boy and not steal any multi-millionaire jets,” Hangman smirked. “At the moment at least.” Hangman said, flicking his toothpick to the side.

Maverick huffed out a laugh, “How was your last deployment, kid? I didn’t think you’d be back so soon.” Mav said, face turning serious. “Did something-?”

Hangman felt his heart clench, this is what he wanted, right? For the others to care, to notice, but why does it feel so wrong to admit-?

“Nah, Cap, I’m good, too good to be true in fact that I’m back here, now,” Hangman said leaning forward in his desk and giving Mav a disarming wink.

Mav gave him a once over, before sighing and shaking his head as he stood up.

“Come over for dinner on Friday, some of the others are still on deployment or with their families. Heck, Bob, Fanboy, Coyote, and Bradley are on a road trip right now, they left a couple days ago, if they knew you were here they would have waited a while for you to come with them or something,” Mav said.

Jake shrugged, he knew about the road trip. He’s been back stateside for more than a week. His body would kill him if he came, though.

“Nah, it’s fine, pops, they probably already got it planned out, anyways, plus,” Hangman gave Mav a mischievous smile. “I get you all to myself for dinner, isn’t that a treat.”

Mav rolled his eyes as he walked to stand beside Jake’s chair. “Shut up, you brat, you just want to send pictures of my cooking to the squad to make them jealous,” Mav said as he ruffled his hair and slung an arm around the boy’s shoulders to pull him in a side hug. “It’s good to have you back, son.”

Jake turned his head to bury his head on the older man’s stomach for just a minute. “It’s good to be back, pops.”

—

“MmmMMm, this is the best fucking thing I’ve tasted in forever,” Jake groaned as he shovelled another bite of the steak. Mav was surprisingly talented behind the grill, and apparently the best mac and cheese was Ice’s personal recipe.

“I’m glad you like it, kid, make sure to eat your greens too,” Mav said smiling as he handed Jake the serving bowl of salad.

“Come on, Mav, let the boy enjoy his steak, he just came back from deployment,” Ice said grinning as he dabbed his mouth with a napkin.

Mav rolled his eyes upwards, “and people call me the irresponsible one.”

“Well, your Navy track record proceeds you.”

“As if yours is as clean as they think it is.”

“I’m better at not getting caught, also, which one of us actually remembered to do groceries this morning, love?” Ice said smirking and giving Jake a wink, making Jake remember to actually put the steak in his mouth as he watched the two banter.

It was surreal to see his Captain and the COMPACFLT in such a domestic situation.

Mav pouted and looked at Jake, “See what I have to deal with?”

Ice chuckled and gave Mav a small peck on the cheek, “You’re what I have to deal with. Forever.” Mav eyes softened at that as he intertwined their hands on the table.

“My wingman for life.”

Jake decided that he was being too nice and fake gagged, “you both our sickeningly sweet, there ain’t supposed to be anythin’ too sweet' with the steak, but you all decided to add too much sugar that ‘m growin’ cavities.” Jake said, narrowing his eyes at them.

“Too much sugar, hmm?” Ice said, raising a brow as he rested his chin on his fist. “So I suppose you don’t want the carrot cake I baked for dessert?”

Jake frowned, “Hey, hey, hey, I ain’t sayin’ that, carrot cake is good and healthy, I want some.”

Ice grinned wider, “What’s the magic word, Jacob?”

Jake rolled his eyes, “pleeaaaasseeee?” He drew out.

“Ah, ah, ah, no sass, young man,” Mav said, raising a fork at him as he stood up to presumably grab the cake.

Jake crossed his arms, “You can’t talk, Mav.”

“I can talk in my own house, kid. Remember, nobody likes a smartass.”

“Then why did Ice marry you?”

“My dashingly good looks, of course,” Mav said flashing a hollywood type smile as he grabbed the cake from the fridge.

Jake squinted, “I don’t see it.” Ice huffed out a laugh at that one as he started cutting up the cake. Jake perked up as Ice put down a big slice for him.

“Thank you, Admiral Kazansky,” Jake said, shoveling the cake in his mouth.

“What did I say about calling me admiral in my own home, son?”

“Not to do it because it makes you feel old, Ice.”

“Good job, now by the way, how are you Jake? Have your injuries healed nicely, or are they still sore?” Ice asks, for the first time looking at Jake seriously dead in the eye.

Jake froze and he felt ice go down his spine as he paused looking up at Ice wide eyed. He thought he got away with it, but of course, this is fucking Iceman, the commander of the Pacific fleet.

“Injuries? What injuries? Jake?” Mav said looking confused as he looked back and forth between the two.

Ice frowned at Mav, “You didn’t know? He didn’t tell you?”

“Tell me what, out with it, you two,” Mav sternly said.

Jake forced himself to give a small chuckle, “It’s nothing, pops, just a bit of a scuffle in my last deployment, nothing serious.”

He was in the sick-bay for more than a week.

Mav narrowed his eyes at Jake, “Uh-huh, does nothing serious cause you to be back stateside when your previous deployment was supposed to end in 3 months?”

Well, Mav didn’t make it this far for being dumb.

Jake poked down on his carrot cake, “I’m fine, pops, it’s nothin’, really.”

“Jacob Seresin, look at me.” Mav ordered, making Jake tense.

“It’s none of ya business, it’s my private file, you don’t need to know shit,” Jake growled, standing up, good mood ruined.

Jake felt his heart thump against his chest. They shouldn’t know, they can’t know. Why can’t they know? Because they’ll see you as weak. No they won’t. Yes, they will. He wanted them to be there, they can’t they won’t, stop being a bother, stop being a whiny--

“Jake, look at me,” Mav ordered again, albeit in a softer manner, Jake slowly met Mav's eyes, again. "Why didn't you tell us?"

"I-I don't know," Jake softly admitted.

He wanted them to find out for themselves, but he could have told them himself. He wanted them to be there sooner. And now that they know even though it's late. It was never their job to know, it was Jake’s job to communicate as a fucking adult.

“Do you really believe that we wouldn’t care?”

Jake shrugged in response. None of them noticed he wasn’t responding to messages for a couple of weeks.

Mav gave out a sigh, making Jake shrink on himself. “Is anyone helping you with taking care of your injuries, bud?”

“Nah, I’m good, pops, takes me a while, but I could figure it out on my own,” Jake said, sighing.

“You shouldn’t have too, son, come on, you need to tend to them before you go to bed, right? How about Mav will help you,” Ice said standing up. “I’ll get the first aid kit, Mav go settle Jake in the guest room.”

“That’s not necessary, sir-” Jake started, eyes wide.

“We know, but we want to help you, Jake,” Mav said gently clasping a hand on his shoulder steering him towards the room.

Jake could have fought, but he didn’t want to. He just nodded as they walked towards the room.

Mav made him sit down on the edge of the bed and ordered him to strip down to show the stitches, and Jake, too tired to argue just silently complied, unbuttoning his shirt to unveil the bandages wrapped around his torso and the patches of bruises scattered all around.

He looked up when he heard Mav take a deep inhale of breath, seeing the pity in the old man’s eyes, making him scowl and look away. “I don’t want your pity.”

“I’m worried about you, Jake,” Mav said, softly. “Why didn’t you tell anyone?”

“How’d ya know if I told someone?”

Mav gave him a look.

“My commanding officer is my emergency contact, he was the only one who needed to know,” Jake said, running a hand through his hair. “Shit, I don’t know why I’m here, I can do this on my own–”

“At ease, Lieutenant Seresin.” Ice sternly said as he came in with a very big med kit. “Let’s clean up your wounds first, then we’ll talk, alright?”

“Unless you’re really uncomfortable with us helping you,” Mav said, looking sadly at him. “We’re not gonna force you to do anything, buddy, but it would ease our old hearts to see that you’re okay.” Mav said, forcing a smile that just looked sad.

And didn’t that make Jake’s heart clench.

“Fine,” Jake muttered, shifting forward and started removing his old bandages.

Mav gently took over, asking Jake to put his arms up so that he could get to them easier. Mav slowly removed the bandages, making sure skin wasn’t pulled, maneuvering Jake, so that his boy would be as comfortable as possible.

Ice crouched down in front of Jake and showed him the assortment of antibiotic ointments and creams, Jake nodded in consent, pointing out which ones he usually used. Ice nodded as he pulled them out and slowly moved his hand closer to Jake as he worked in tandem with Mav, both of them treating Jake with so much care.

When he let them help him, he expected it to be painful and much longer than if he had done it. That’s usually what happened anyways when he had to rely on others.

He was wrong.

They were slow, but steady, steady made their actions smooth, efficient, fast.

Ice let Jake lean forward, his forehead resting on the older man’s shoulder as the man quickly ran a hand through his hair before dabbling antibiotic cream to the wounds on his back.

Jake swore he just closed his eyes for one second.

“Buddy? Come on Jake-y, wake up for a bit, then you can go back to sleep, okay,” Mav said gently, nudging his shoulder.

Jake grumbled and felt Ice chuckle as he helped the younger man sit up, again.

“Come on, little prince, hands up, please,” Mav murmured, helping Jake into a big hoodie. “Can you change into sweatpants?”

Jake nodded as he clumsily complied, afterwards he blinked and suddenly Mav and Ice were tucking him in the guest room bed. Someone turned the lights off, and the two older men were saying their goodbyes when Jake tugged on Mav’s shirt.

“Mav? I’m sorry I didn’t tell ya, I-I don’t know why exactly I didn’t,” Jake said frowning looking up with half-lidded eyes. “W-wanted ya’ll to be there, just, hard,” Jake muttered.

He felt the bed dip beside him, a calloused hand cupping his cheek, “It’s okay, little prince, I understand, we’ll talk about it more once you rest up, okay?”

“We’ll be there for you when you wake up, son, and we’ll always be there for you when we can,” Ice said, reaching over to stroke Jake’s hair.

That was enough for Jake to let himself rest.

—--

("I didn't finish my carrot cake," Jake muttered against Mav's chest.

"It's okay, we still have some more, and how about Ice makes you some chocolate cake tomorrow, buddy?" Mav softly said running a hand through Jake's strands, smirking as Ice scowled at him.

“Didn’t you just bitch about how Jacob here needs his greens, and now–”

“Please, Pa?” Jake said looking up. “I mean the carrot cake is delicious and I love it, so if you’re busy, I get it–”

“No, son, I can make the cake, I’ll just have to use my husband for some logistics help, okay?” Ice said, cutting off his rant as he rubbed Jake’s back.

“I-If it’s okay with you and pops, I don’t want to be a bo-”

“You’re not a bother, plus we were already planning on making chocolate cake for a while, you just gave us an excuse to move up our plans, and have an early cheat day,” Mav said, wagging his eyebrows with a wink.

“More like permanent cheat week,” Ice mattered.)

—

(“Put me down as your emergency contact, please.” Mav said as he squeezed Jake tighter, to make sure the boy won’t have to see the tears building in his eyes. “Please, son.”)

—

(Imagine what happens once the Dagger Squad finds out what happened to Jake.)

#jake hangman seresin #jake seresin #fanfic #mavdad #pete maverick mitchell #top gun #top gun fandom #top gun maverick #tom iceman kazansky #hangman angst #angst #hurt/comfort

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crinkled-emotions · 1 year ago

Text

Day 25: Secret Santa

Hi hi! This one, again, would have made... so much more sense... had I published on Dec 25th 😂

Ship: Hangster (I'm in such a Hangster mood rn please disregard)

The original prompt:

Maverick finished cutting and folding paper then tossed them into his helmet, opening the airstream door and calling out to the Daggers who were floating around the hangar. Hangman, Bob, Payback and Rooster were lying on Maverick’s couches in front of his TV, squabbling about a football game. Phoenix and Coyote were playing table tennis and Fanboy was on a running commentary, earning an eyeroll from the other two. Rooster glanced up from where he was sitting on the floor between Bob’s legs, an eyebrow raised.

“What’s up, Mav?”

“Come grab a piece of paper each; the name you draw is who you’re buying for this year’s Secret Santa.”

“Hangman if I draw your name know you’re not getting anything,” Phoenix said as she climbed over the back of the couch between Bob and Payback, the first one to grab a name from the hat... helmet.

“Please tell me that’s not the one you’re using at the moment,” Rooster complained to Maverick as he reached up to grab one himself.

“Okay, I won’t tell you that.”

“Phoenix if I get you, I’m getting you tickets to the next Longhorns game,” Hangman said as he accidentally tripped over Rooster who was back on the floor after grabbing his paper.

“Getting yourself tickets to the next Longhorns game,” Bob muttered. Hangman smirked.

“Why not, right?”

“Just when I thought you’d changed, Bagman,” Phoenix sighed as she flopped into a spot on the couch. Once everyone had their piece of paper Maverick shooed them off to go back to causing chaos in the rest of the hangar. With everyone else distracted, Rooster opened his paper for a second time and winced. He stood, touching Maverick’s arm in passing.

“Hey, I forgot; I have PT first thing tomorrow morning. I’m gonna head back now and get some sleep beforehand. It’s been great out here this week, thanks Mav.”

Maverick regarded him for a moment, then smiled at him.

“Back still giving you trouble?”

“It never got better after I ejected, but PT helps.”

“That’s good, kid. Keep up with it. Let me know when you get home, yeah?”

“Gotcha.”

Maverick gave him a quick hug and Rooster went over to the rest of the Daggers to let them know he was heading out, earning a groan from Phoenix and a look from Hangman. If anyone could tell he was bullshitting, it was probably those two.

“You good, man?” Coyote asked. He was also so very perceptive when it came to bullshit.

“Fine, it’s just- y’know, I don’t really want to miss PT if it’s the only thing that helps my back, especially because I can’t do my usual gym routine at the moment.”

“Ah, gotcha. Okay man, we’ll probably see you later, we’re all thinking of going out for dinner sometime next week if you’re down?”

“Only if you’re paying, Javy,” Rooster grinned. The two bumped shoulders in good jest then Phoenix gave him a hug.

“Call me if you want to talk about it,” she said subtly as she pulled away.

“Thanks, Tash.”

With that he waved goodbye to the others and got into the Bronco, starting the engine and letting it warm up whilst he connected his phone to the new Bluetooth system he’d managed to connect about a month ago. He took a deep breath, glancing toward the others who were still having fun in the hangar and wondered if they’d figured out what was going on.

“That was weird, right?”

Phoenix hummed when Hangman appeared at her side, lining up her next shot on the pool table.

“You and I both know he freezes like that for no reason sometimes. He’d say something if it was serious-“

“-Trace.”

Hangman sent her a look and Phoenix cleared her throat.

“You’re right, that’s wishful thinking. We both know he doesn’t have PT for another week so what made him run for the hills?”

“The threat of commitment?” Hangman suggested, earning a pool cue to the gut. She continued to be a good shot, apparently. The pair glanced up when the airstream door opened and Maverick quietly slipped inside. They exchanged a look, and Phoenix reached for her phone.

“I don’t think they had a fight, we would’ve heard it, but I’m just gonna make sure he’s okay,” she muttered as she typed out a text. Hangman hummed.

“I’ll go see if I can get it out of Mav. He doesn’t go quiet unless it’s to do with a Bradshaw.”

“Don’t do anything stupid,” Phoenix pleaded. She went back to her pool game and Hangman approached Coyote and Bob.

“Hey, did either of you see when Mav’s mood changed?”

“As far as I’m aware it didn’t-“

“-when we all checked who we had for Secret Santa.”

Coyote was quick to dismiss it but Bob’s wallflower personality had the gossip Hangman needed. He was quick to ruffle Bob’s perfectly styled hair, glancing over his shoulder.

“Hey Phoenix, I got it!”

Phoenix: did you fight with Mav? (sent: 1:32pm)

Rooster: no? (sent: 6:30pm)

Rooster: what would make you think that? (sent: 6:31pm)

Phoenix: you pretty much ran out of the hangar and you’re not a runner anymore (sent: 6:32pm)

Rooster: look (sent: 6:35pm)

Rooster: it’s nothing (sent: 6:35pm)

Phoenix: you drove the 4 hours back to San Diego for no reason (sent: 6:40pm)

Rooster: do we really have to do this? I have PT (sent: 6:45pm)

Phoenix: bullshit (sent: 6:46pm)

Phoenix: if it’s not a big deal you would have already dealt with it (sent: 6:47pm)

Rooster: seriously Tash it’s nothing (sent: 6:48pm)

Phoenix: fine (sent: 7pm)

Phoenix: but I’m here if you want to get it off your chest (sent: 7:01pm)

Rooster: I know (sent: 7:02pm)

Rooster: but thanks (sent: 7:03pm)

Phoenix: I got your back (sent: 7:04pm)

Hangman had let Maverick go for the rest of the afternoon and into the evening, but after dinner and a couple beers he sidled over and flopped onto the couch beside him.

“So; you and Roos have a fight?”

“No...?”

“Just checkin’, he left like his tail was on fire.”

“He’s your boyfriend isn’t he?” Maverick replied, an eyebrow raised. Hangman cleared his throat.

“Don’t change the subject, sir. Something changed when we did the Secret Santa draw; is everything okay?”

“You don’t give up, do you?” Maverick sighed, “but fine, as long as you don’t tell him.”

He reached into his pocket, offering the piece of paper he’d drawn last. Hangman opened it and whistled.

“You got something in mind?”

“Maybe. It’s... I dunno, it’s probably stupid, but-“

“-it won’t be stupid, and you’re not gonna piss him off. He’s come a long way since the Dagger mission, Mav, don’t worry about that.”

Maverick hummed, but his gaze remained on his lap. Hangman gently bumped his shoulder.

“If it helps, I’ll go and check on him tomorrow. I was thinking of heading back anyway, leave isn’t super long this time and I have to do a couple things before they torture me on base.”

That earned a chuckle and Hangman took it as a win.

Rooster wasn’t entirely surprised to find Hangman in his kitchen when he came back from his morning run, making what looked like coffee and breakfast. They shared a gentle kiss against the counter, Hangman offering the cup of liquid gold he was drinking to his partner.

“You want to tell me what’s going on?” He started. Rooster shook his head.

“I need a shower first.”

Hangman frowned but he slowly nodded.

“Okay; go shower and then we’re going to talk. No slipping out a window, yeah? We’re too old for that shit.”

Rooster snorted, pressing a kiss to his lips before heading upstairs. Hangman sighed.

Hangman: he’s being cagey (sent: 8:45am)

Phoenix: duh (sent: 8:46am)

When Rooster returned, freshly showered and ready for the day, he took the plate offered and the couple went to the dining table. Whilst they ate they made light conversation, planning out what they wanted to do over the next couple of days other than a date night and making out on Rooster’s couch. Their plates quickly became empty and Hangman took Rooster by the hand.

“Babe,” he started softly, “tell me what’s going on in your head.”

Despite popular belief, Hangman wasn’t a pet names guy, he leaned more toward nicknames and variations of callsigns; the way he said babe told Rooster he was serious. Rooster’s gaze fell to the dining table, spotting various stains on the tabletop.

“It’s dumb,” he muttered. Hangman squeezed his hand.

“Probably, but I want to hear it anyway.”

“I got Mav for the Secret Santa. I knew there was a chance, I just didn’t think it would happen. There’s six other names I could have drawn, y’know?”

“That makes sense. You worried about it not being good enough for him?”

“It’s our first Christmas after coming back together; I think I broke his heart last year when I told him you and me were going to Australia for Christmas so I wouldn’t be around. I just want it to mean something.”

Hangman’s brows furrowed.

“I didn’t know he’d offered to have you last Christmas, but it makes sense now. You were unhinged in Australia, honey.”

Rooster snorted. When Hangman stood to approach him he instinctively opened his arms to let him into his space.

“Look, there’s a couple things you need to remember; one, I love you. Two, Mav adores you. Three, you could give him a plain white mug and he’d still treasure it because it came from you, B. He doesn’t care about what he gets, just that you’re there.”

Rooster hummed.

“You know this is why I keep you around, right?”

“Oh; so it’s not the great sex?”

“That too.”

Christmas Day rolled around and the Daggers plus Penny and Amelia gathered at the hangar, sharing a meal and playing football on the tarmac. Amelia had quickly integrated herself into the group of adults around her; as much as Penny was a great mom Amelia found that she also liked talking to Phoenix, a great role model for younger girls like her. Penny and Maverick sat back to watch them hand in hand, exchanging a fond look when Bob tackled Payback and everyone cheered for him.

“He’s come a long way,” Penny said. Maverick hummed.

“It shows in the air, too. He’s always had confidence in the air but it’s only grown-“

“-oh, no, I was talking about Rooster.”

Maverick’s gaze tracked around the group, finding his godson with his boyfriend. Amelia approached them and Rooster smiled at her, leaving Hangman’s side to listen to what she had to say.

“I’d say he’s finally found peace,” Maverick agreed. Penny squeezed his hand.

“Have you?”

“Who knows.”

Amelia came running to the two adults, tugging at Maverick’s hand.

“C’mon, Rooster wants to do Secret Santa.”

“Oh, does he?” Penny teased, exchanging a look with her partner. Maverick hefted himself out of his seat.

“We better not keep him waiting. Go round up the others, Amelia.”

She took off to the others, yelling for them. Penny bumped Maverick’s shoulder.

“Do you want to tell me why you’ve been so cagey lately?”

“Me? Cagey? Just trying not to get myself sent to another foreign country, Penny,” he replied. She gave him the look, the same one he’d just seen Hangman give Rooster, and winced.

“I got Rooster for Secret Santa and I’m a little worried about what I got him.”

“You’re worried he’s going to throw another temper tantrum? I really don’t think he’s got it in him anymore, honey.”

“I know... I think. I don’t want to risk it.”

“Okay, well, Hangman’s here, Phoenix is here, I’m here. We’re not going to let him ruin Christmas if that what he feels he needs to do.”

Penny squeezed his hand and they went to join the others who had gathered around the Christmas tree toward the back of the hangar.

“Phoenix.”

“Thanks, Amelia.”

Phoenix took the wrapped present from the younger girl, watching her hand the rest of them around. Rooster’s came as a wrapped large box, whilst Maverick’s was flatter but more rectangular. The others tore into theirs but it took a minute for Rooster and Maverick to pull off the paper. Rooster was the first to pop open his box and he immediately tossed the box on to Hangman’s lap to give Maverick a hug.

“I didn’t know you kept it,” he muttered. Maverick breathed a sigh.

“I found it last week, thought you might want it back.”

“What is it?” Phoenix asked Hangman, who reached into the box and produced a tiny airplane toy. When Rooster returned to his side he took the toy back, keeping it close to him. Hangman frowned but chose not to question it at that moment, instead flipping open the envelope he’d been handed.

“Oh, would you look at that! Longhorns tickets. I wonder who did that?” He said in a way that told everyone exactly what had happened.

“How the fuck did you draw yourself?” Bob groaned at the same time the others laughed. Hangman smirked.

“I’m just that good, Baby on board. I’m so good, in fact, that Rooster-“

“-open yours, Mav, before I have to cover Amelia’s ears,” Phoenix pleaded. Maverick gently opened the box and his eyes softened.

“All these years I thought I’d lost it. Where did you find it?”

At first the team assumed he was talking to Penny, but Rooster was the one to speak up.

“A couple weeks ago, I was cleaning out the Bronco and I found it wedged in a really weird spot. Never noticed it before, thought you might want it back.

“Guys, being mysterious is fun when you’re not pushing sixty,” Amelia groaned. Penny gently swatted her arm whilst the others laughed. Maverick rolled his eyes, holding up what looked like a keyring that had seen better days.

“I bought this when Bradley was born. I don’t believe in luck but this thing went everywhere with me and it kept me safe. The one time I didn’t have it, well... we lost Goose that day and I searched for it every day after. I had no idea it was in that damn truck of his.”

The others went quiet, Hangman reaching subtly for Rooster’s hand between them. Finally, Rooster cleared his throat.

“You never told me that.”

“I know, kid.”

“Is that Tasmania?” Phoenix blurted, standing from her seat and gesturing vaguely toward the desert outside the hangar doors.

“What does that even- oh. Yeah, goddamn, that looks like it! C’mon guys.”

Hangman followed along, gesturing with a (not) subtle head tilt toward the hangar doors. Everyone but Maverick and Rooster made a swift exit, giving them a moment to themselves.

“I’m really glad you could be here this year, Bradley. I’m not upset about Australia, you do know that right?”

“It’s good to hear it,” Rooster confessed. Maverick hummed.

“Let’s start fresh in the new year, huh? Stop running and try talking?”

“Sounds like a plan.”

They shared a look, then laughed.

“I can’t believe you still had it,” Rooster muttered.

“Always. Thought you might want it back, give it to your kids some day.”

“This is a real cockblock, Roos. I’m trying to get laid and you’re staring at that toy?”

“Shush, Jake.”

Rooster lifted the toy to the tent light, showing a crack in one of the wings. Hangman huffed, making himself comfortable against Rooster’s shoulder and sending him a look.

“Why are you so hooked on that toy?”

“My mom said it was the last thing I got from my dad. We went to see him and Mav at TOPGUN and it was only a couple days later that he...”

Rooster cleared his throat.

“You know the story.”

“Wow... what’s the crack in the wing from?”

“I cried for, like, three hours. I was playing with it in the park and some older kid took it, stepped on it, then called me a baby. I was six. It took Mav and mom about an hour to fix it, but when they went to give it back to me I was hiding under Mav’s leather jacket and sobbing. Apparently the crying stopped the second I had it back.”

Hangman laughed, reaching up to press a kiss to his lips.

“That’s adorable; I’ll be telling Phoenix that one later.”

Rooster hummed, finally tucking the toy into his backpack and using his body weight to flip them.

“Sorry, you said something about getting laid?”

“Tell me more,” Hangman grinned.

#G's Dec 2023 Prompts!#Bradley Rooster Bradshaw #Bradley Bradshaw #Rooster #Callsign: Rooster #Natasha Phoenix Trace #Natasha Trace #Phoenix #Callsign: Phoenix #Jake Hangman Seresin #Jake Seresin #Hangman #Callsign: Hangman #Pete Maverick Mitchell #Pete Mitchell #Maverick #Callsign: Maverick #Hangster #hurt/comfort

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sachiko6243 · 2 years ago

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The good old Doc - Part 10

Missed the start? No problem, here is the first part, the following ones are always linked at the end, so you dont have to search endlessly. 😉

Summary: Lieutenant Lilith Adams enlisted back in the military, only to be met with a certain cocky pilot. Overcoming certain past traumas, she tries to fit in with the team of pilots as their personal medic. Soon finding her stuck between a certain good looking aviator and her work morals.

This is a series which is currently in the making, so I don’t exactly know how long it is going to be. 😊

Word count: 2932

Warnings: talk about infertility, oral (f receiving), Jake being sweet af

Minors DNI !!!

We barely made it through the door. Jake just fast enough turning around and locking it, before he was back on me again. He walked me backwards into the room, guiding me down on the couch. He hovered over me, parting my legs and pressing his member against my core. I grinded my hips against him, to satisfy the need washing over my body. “Jake…” I moaned. Fingers desperately working his uniform open. Meanwhile Jake opened the zipper on the side of my dress, shoving it over my head and throwing it into a corner of the room. His eyes immediately scanned over my body. Taking in the black lace bra and black lace thong. “Fuck, darlin… You are going to be the death of me.” He rasped.

The cold metal of his belt, stung against my warm thighs, sending shivers down my body. My hands were shaking, tugging on his uniform, to get him out of it. He understood my desperateness, ridding him from his clothes. When I saw him only wearing his boxer briefs, I gulped. Sure, I have seen his arms many times in training, or when I was drawing blood to check his results. But his body was marbled with nothing but muscles. The fine blond chest hair accentuated his six pack and chest muscles. A thin, groomed line of hair descended his belly, vanishing into his boxers. I reached my hand out, only to stop midmovement, not sure if he wanted me to touch him.

He grinned at my hesitation, grabbing my hand, and guiding it towards his body. “You are allowed to touch it. No, you are expected to do.” Then his hands were over my body again. Mapping it out, tracing every line and scar. His lips were pressing open mouth kisses everywhere he could reach. Goosebumps running over my skin as an answer.

I was lost in the feeling. The heat of the night, mixed with the warmth of his body, wrapping me up into a safe and protected cocoon. “Jake…” I whimpered, pressing my body against his chest, when he sucked in the skin under my ear. He growled at my begging, hand slipping under my back. “May I?” He asked, playing with the hooks of my bra. “Yes please!” I begged, arching my back to give him better access. His experienced fingers quickly ridded me of my bra, throwing it through the room, before his lips were attached to one nipple. Sucking and licking on it, like it was the sweetest candy he ever tasted.

Instinctively I clawed to his shoulders, arching my back even more. He switched between my breasts, kneading the other one with big strong hands. I could feel myself grow wetter with every second he was touching me. Wrapping my legs around his hips, I pulled him in, desperate to feel something against my core. “Please, Jake. I need…” My words got stuck in my throat, when one hand wandered between our bodies, caressing my core through the lace of my panties. “So wet for me already. Tell me, darlin. What do you want from me?” He rasped, kissing down my stomach, eyes never leaving my face.

“I need… fuck…” My brain was mushed, short circuiting at the sight of this marvelous pilot between my legs. “You need what, sweet cheeks. Talk to me. I want you to say it with big words, like a good girl.” Jake was now hovering directly over my core. Gently nipping on the fabric of my panties. Pulling them between his teeth and letting them snap back against my hip bones.

“I want to feel you.” I whimpered, bucking my hips into his face, earning a chuckle from him. With one last look, checking in for any discomfort, he pulled down my panties, throwing them through the room. “My god, darlin…” He growled at the sight of my glistening pussy, dripping with arousal. Looking me deep in the eyes he dove down, licking a broad stripe over my aching cunt. I couldn’t help it, bucking my hips up in pleasure and crying out his name. His big hands came around my legs, tugging open my thighs and holding me down. The feeling was marvelous. The way he sucked and licked my clit, changing his attention every now and then between my folds, lapping up my slick.

I grabbed hold of his short golden hair with one hand, desperately trying to steady me against the rising tension in my core. He hummed in pleasure, at me tugging at his strands, the vibration going straight through my body. “Jake…” I was a whimpering mess underneath him and it didn’t even take him long to get me here. “Jake… I need more. Please… Fuck!” I cried out, when he sucked my pearl harder than before. My brain swerving of the road of what I was going to say.

“What, baby girl? What do you need?” He growled, a complete shift in his manners. Eyes blown black with lust and hunger. Threatening to eat me alive in the most sexual way possible. The sweet gentleman attitude, he reserved for me, was gone. But rather then setting me off, it turned me on. Way more than any man before him could ever do it. “Talk to me, darlin. Tell me, what you need and I will do it.” Jake pressed on, playing with my folds, smearing my slick all over my cunt and thighs.

“Fingers… I need fingers.” I panted, pulling him back down, but he resisted. Teasingly running a finger over my folds. “How do you need them?” Then he let it slowly sink into my pussy. “Like this? Or more like this?” He asked, curling it upwards, against the soft spongy spot deep in my core. I cried out on pleasure, writhing underneath his hold, clenching around his finger. “God, you are so tight, how am I supposed to fuck you properly, when you are already squeezing my finger?” His voice was hoarse, grinding on the edge of complete madness. “I think I have to prepare you, darlin, because I swear, if I feel that tight sweet pussy gripping my cock like its gripping me now, I will come before I even start.” Pushing another finger in, he had me seeing stars. Scissoring them apart, dragging them over my walls, massaging my insides. His mouth dipped down again, sucking my clit between his lips.

Letting out a whiny fuck, was all I could muster at his lustful torture. The way he found a steady rhythm with his fingers and tongue had me craving for more. I wanted him to fuck me. Ruin me. Mark me for everyone to see. Every ounce of feminism left my body the moment this man laid his beautiful mouth on me. And I couldn’t care less. To hell with emancipation. Let me have that perfect example of a man, have his primal and ruthless way with me. All I could think about was Jake. He was taking up all the capacity left in my brain. The rest of it drowned in the hot waves of pleasure washing through my body, threatening to pull me under.

I was close to coming. The coil in my stomach about to snap, about to rip me apart. “Jake… I am close… I...” I was whimpering, thrashing around his head. But Jake didn’t seem to mind. And by the way his eyes lit up at my confession, you could think he wanted it even more than I did. “Go on, sweet girl. Come for me. Make a mess on my face, my fingers.” He spurred me on, holding eye contact, while he kept pushing me towards the edge. I reached for his hand laying on my lower stomach, holding me in place. Clawing at his strong arm. He growled at me pushing my nails in his arm, but I didn’t care. All I could think about was him and his tongue. The vibration of his growl, finally sending me flying over the cliff.

A cry of incoherent words left my mouth, back arching from the sofa, thighs clamping down on his head. I squeezed my eyes shut, chanting his name, while pure white bliss washed over me. Far away, I could feel his mouth leaving me, spreading open mouth kisses over my body, while his fingers kept on massaging me through my high. Then he was on top of me, watching me intently, as I pulled him down for a kiss. I could taste myself on him, mixing deliciously with the taste of beer and Jake. He pulled his hand from between my legs, bringing it up to my mouth. I took his forefinger and middlefinger between my lips, sucking on them, cleaning all my arousal off.

Jake clenched his jaw, eyes fixated on where his lips vanished into my mouth. With a soft plop, I let them slip out of my lips, looking at him with doe eyes. I spread my legs wider, inviting him in. “Please, Jake… I need to feel you. Take me, fuck me. I want it all, please.” I pleaded, hands wandering over his body, gripping wherever they could. “Do you have condoms?” He asked, teeth gritted. I shook my head. “We wont need them.” I stammered, feeling once again the blush creep up my cheeks.

“So, you are on birth control and clean? Because I am. I got checked last week.” He asked, still looking at me with the eyes of an eagle. I tilted my head, blushing even more. “I know you are. I was the one taking your blood work.” Internally grateful, for him not making this awkward. It was standard procedure for navy pilots to get checked over every three months, offering them a general health check on top for free. Jake was known to fuck around a lot, so it wasn’t new to me, that he would ask for an STD check. He had many sorted in his medical files and I wondered how he was able to have caught nothing in his years of being a bed hopper. But then I remembered what I just said. ‘We wont need them’. He was expecting me to be on the pill. But I wasn’t. I was in fact infertile from my torture of the Taliban. How would he take it, when I would tell him? Am I supposed to tell him now? Would he be angry or upset with me? Leaving me? I turned my head, fighting the tears from spilling.

He smiled at me, when he noticed my face growing redder with every passing second. But then he froze, when he saw me on the edge of crying. Immediately he backed off, sitting back on his knees. “Whats wrong, darlin? Did I do something?” He asked, hands reaching out for me, stopping midway. Now crucially aware of my nudity, I curled up to a ball, hiding under his worried stare. “We don’t have to go any further, sweet cheeks. Its fine if you don’t want to.” He whispered, desperately trying to figure out, why I shied away from him. A loud sob escaped my lips, the first tear rolling down my cheek. “That’s not… that’s not what I worry about.” I answered with shaky breaths.

“Then what is scaring you? Have I done something wrong?” Jake was still distressed. “Look, Lilith, I want you to feel safe and loved with me. You can trust me. I will not be going anywhere. If you need time, then I will give you as much as you need, but please tell me whats upsetting you. Let me help.” He pleaded, worry written over his features. And that made me crumble completely. I crawled into his arms, clinging to his body. Now I was sobbing uncontrollably, hiding my face in his arms. “I cant tell you.” I whimpered. “I am ruined and as soon as you know it, you will leave me. And that’s okey. You deserve someone better. Someone whole. Someone who you can start a family with.”

“Sweet cheeks, listen to me. I am not going anywhere, you hear me?” Jake soothed me, holding me close to him. Then realization dawned over him. “What do you mean? Someone who can give me a family? Are you…?”

I nodded in his arm. “Yes… I am sorry. So sorry.” That seemed to anger him, because he jerked me back, forcing me to look in his eyes. “What are you sorry for? That’s not your fault!”

“But it is. I was captured by the Taliban. I let them torture me. I could have fought back, but I didn’t. I…” I cried, arms thrashing in the air, wrapping around his neck, and hiding again in his hard chest. He interrupted me with such force in his words, I shrieked: “Don’t you dare be sorry for something you had no control over. You did your best at surviving. And you should be proud for doing it, because it shows what a strong, powerful woman you are. I don’t care if you are fertile or not. I could care less about children. All I want is you. You alone make me happy. And if you ever want children, we can adopt. I love you the way you are, do you understand?”

I nodded, wiping away the tears from my cheeks. “And you are not lying?”

“Why should I be lying to you?” He asked. His hands stroking my face, my hair, my back. I shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe to not upset me more?”

He huffed: “Do you think I would play you like that?” I shook my head. “Sorry. Its just… I always thought you would want a family and you would want it soon.”

“Why? Because I am already 30?” He laughed at my assumption. “Let me make one thing clear: Three weeks ago, I was fully convinced I would be single for the rest of my life. Not worthy of being more than an exiting one-night-stand.” He raised a finger to shut me off. “No listen. Then you came around. Crashing into my reality, like a tornado. Sassing back like hell spit out a demon. I knew from that moment, I needed you. And I will be around as long as you want me to. Deal with it, because I am not leaving. You are perfect for me. You ground me, keep me in check, make me a better man. And I will be damned to let you go over such a minor thing like you being fertile or not. I love you. More than words can express.”

His words had me crying again. But this time it was because I felt happy. It was like I was seeing the light of day the first time. He loved me. “Thank you, Jake.” I leaned into his touch, smiling sheepishly. He grinned down at me, poking me playfully. “Don’t thank me for doing the bare minimum. Although you can thank me for making you come like I did.” I smacked him on the chest, which had him chuckle against my hair. “I can think of another good reason, why I don’t mind it.” His voice was as cocky as when he was speaking to someone of the team. “We can save a lot of money for not using protection. Save it for a future home, where I can fuck you in every room, on every piece of furniture.”

“You are so full of yourself, Bagman.” I wheezed, a blush creeping up my cheeks.

“Yeah? Maybe I am. But you know what I am thinking right now? I want you to be full of me. I want my cock buried so deep in you, that you are forgetting every man in this world. I want to fuck you, until you see stars. And then I will mark you with my cum. Have it drip out of you perfect pussy, make a mess everywhere I am going to fuck you.” He whispered in my ear, voice low and raspy. He was clearly turned on by what he was saying. “I can take you whenever I want, however I want. Will you let me do that? Fill your pussy with my cum? Please, darling. Let me show you what it means to be my girl, please.”

I clenched my thighs together. His words send shivers down my spine, making me wet again. His cock was pressing hard against my back and I could feel him twitch in anticipation, whenever I moved. Shifting my weight, I lifted my body from his hold straddling his lap. Now I could feel his hard member, rubbing against my core. Just a thin layer of his boxers separating us. Slowly, I rolled my hips, grinding against him. With a loud moan Jake let his head fall back into the cushions, hands instinctively gripping my hips, stopping their movements. “For fucks sake, darlin. You have to stop, before I loose myself.” I kissed his neck, down to his throat. Leaving marks on his skin, that would be definitely visible for the next few days. “But I want you to loose it. I want you to fill me up, Lieutenant.” I whimpered under his ear.

My desperation had him moving. In a split second I was laying underneath him, pinned down to the sofa with one hand, while he shuffled out of his underwear. “If you keep saying such filthy things to me, you will regret, what will come next.” He growled; eyes blown dark. I just giggled. “Maybe that’s what I want…”

#hangman x reader #jake hangman seresin #top gun hangman #hangman smut #jake seresin smut #hurt/comfort #top gun

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purplearrowzandleather-blog · 2 years ago

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Jake comes home from his first deployment broken. Maverick is there to pick up the pieces.

#pete maverick mitchell #top gun fandom #jake hangman seresin #hurt/comfort #top gun angst #MavDad #top gun fanfiction #Mitchell Family Name Series #family feels

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drabbles-mc · 2 years ago

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Can't Win 'Em All

Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw x Jake 'Hangman' Seresin

Written for the 2023 Hurt/Comfort Exchange

Warnings: 18+, language, mentions of blood/injury, light angst

Word Count: 2.1k

A/N: This was my first time writing these two at all, let alone in a situation like this, but I had a lot of fun writing them! We love a wound-cleaning scene in this house!

Top Gun Taglist: @garbinge @proceduralpassion (If you want to be added to any of my taglists, please let me know!)

Everyone was supposed to be unwinding, decompressing so that they could come back ready for the next thing when the time was right. After all the chaos of the last mission, the short leave that they got was a more-than-welcome reprieve. It was hard earned and everyone was going to be taking full advantage of it. What exactly “full advantage” meant was different for everyone.

For example, for Bradley it meant that on one of his first full nights back at his own place, he was passed out on the couch before 10PM. Meanwhile, for Jake, it meant that he found himself turning up at Bradley’s door much later than 10PM, banging on it while also using it to keep himself vertical.

Bradley was slumped across his couch, head leaning back against the arm at an angle that was surely going to have him wincing when he woke up in the morning. One arm was draped across his chest, the other was dangling off the edge of the couch. The television was on, infomercials providing the only light and sound in his apartment, aside from his snoring.

Jake leaned against the doorframe, shoulder pressing against it along with the side of his head. He had one arm hanging limply by his side while the other did the work of knocking. It wasn’t frantic—it was slow, almost methodical, but definitely loud. If the knocking didn’t wake Rooster, it was certainly going to wake his neighbors up. At this point, Jake was willing to settle for that.

The knocks finally persisted enough to pull Bradley from whatever dream he’d been steeped in. A few slow blinks later, after a few seconds of the heels of his palms being pressed against his eyes, he had woken himself up enough to realize what was going on. The knocking was grating on his nerves now. All he wanted to do was catch up on all the sleep that he’d been missing, but now he was going to have to deal with whatever, whoever, was trying to knock their way through his door.

He tossed his blanket aside and stumbled his way from the couch to the door. He flicked on lights as he went, still rubbing the last of the sleep from his eyes. He was off-duty, and having to wake up quickly was no longer part of his programming. It wouldn’t be until he was back on base.

“Alright, alright,” he said, shaking his head as he got to the door, not that the person on the other side was going to be able to see him. Leaning in, he pressed his eye to the peephole to see who was knocking this late. When he saw who it was, he wasn’t sure if he was more confused or frustrated. “You kidding me?” he mumbled, more to himself than with the hopes of the man on the other side of the door hearing it.

There was the click of a lock, the slide of a chain, and Jake felt the weight already starting to melt off his shoulders. He meant to push himself upright, stop counting on Rooster’s doorframe to hold him steady, but he didn’t get around to it before the door was pulled open.

“Hangman?” Bradley’s voice still had the gravel of sleep to it.

“Bradshaw,” he tried to sound as unbothered as he always did, tried to let one end of his mouth curl into a smirk. He didn’t quite get it, though. He sounded rough, looked even rougher.

“What…” Rooster trailed off, not needing to finish the sentence for the man in front of him to know what he was asking.

It was more than fair of him to ask. All things being equal, if there was anyone that Bradley thought was going to be showing up on his doorstep, Jake would’ve been down towards the bottom of the list. Maybe not the very last person, but damn close. The way that they left things coming off their last mission together was vague. It always was—they were too busy being snarky with each other to actually communicate much of anything. The rules of engagement while they were on leave always seemed different than when they were on base.

Hangman showing up at his door in the middle of the night, looking like he’d gotten the shit kicked out of him, was definitely breaking all of the rules between them. He was bruised, jaw already starting to swell in a way that no charming grin could ever hope to hide even on his best day. There was a cut just below his eyebrow of one eye, dried blood smeared around it in a way that let Rooster know that Jake had spent more time trying to wipe the blood away than trying to stop the bleeding.

“Didn’t know where else would be open at this hour,” Jake tried to joke, the line falling flatter than it would have if he didn’t look like he was on the brink of needing an EMT.

“Who said my door is open?” Bradley replied, knowing that he wasn’t going to be sending him away, but not wanting to let him have anything easy. That wasn’t how they operated.

“Gonna slam it in my face?”

Bradley let a purposeful pause linger in the air between them, stretching it out for a few seconds past its expiration date.

The extra few seconds did their job. Hangman dropped the charade, what little he still had left of it. “Come on, Bradshaw, you know I got nowhere else to go.”

Exhaustion and annoyance aside, Rooster found himself sighing. His head dropped, chin tucking to his chest. He pulled the door open a little more, enough so that when he stepped aside Hangman would be able to shuffle through without a problem.

Jake did just that, although it was more of a limp than a shuffle. He didn’t turn around to look at Rooster, but he could hear the man putting all the locks back into place. He’d rather wait for Bradley to walk in front of him than turn around to face him, so that’s what he did. While he waited for that, he kept himself busy just trying to stay upright, and also looking around Bradley’s place. It was about what he expected—nothing much but it didn’t feel like it was empty either. Different circumstances would’ve had Hangman cracking snide comments about it all. Weariness prevented him from doing that more than any real sense of gratitude.

“Finally try to pick up the wrong girl?” Rooster joked as he passed by Jake and made his way to the kitchen.

Jake watched him, managing a chuckle as gave a tiny shake to his head. “Something like that.”

Bradley went and opened his freezer, pawing around for a moment before grabbing a bag of frozen vegetables out. He shut the freezer door before turning and throwing the bag to Hangman, no verbal warning given. Jake caught it, but barely.

“Put it on your jaw.” He walked deeper into his apartment without offering any other explanation. “Maybe it’ll shut you up for a few minutes.”

Jake let out one laugh as he did what Rooster had suggested. Despite the fact that he hadn’t been invited to, Jake took a seat on the couch in Rooster’s living room. He noticed the blanket that was wadded up on one end of the sofa, and that combined with the TV being on led him to believe that this was where Rooster had been before he showed up. Finally had a real bed to sleep in and he still chose the couch instead.

Bradley hadn’t been out of the room that long. Still, though, when Jake heard him clearing his throat as he came back, he still flinched. He was waiting for Rooster to have a slick comment about it, but it never came. Maybe they were both just out of sorts enough for things to be alright. Rooster had a small, plastic first aid kit in one hand, a washcloth and small bowl filled with warm water in the other.

“What really happened?” Rooster asked as he sat down on the edge of the coffee table. He was situated directly in front of Hangman, neither of them able to look anywhere but at each other.

Hangman sniffed, eyes dropping for a moment just to have a beat of reprieve from Bradley’s prying gaze. He should’ve known it was coming. No one is that blindly accepting. Especially not Rooster, especially not with him.

“Does it really matter?” he countered.

“I think it might since you don’t wanna tell me.”

Jake allowed himself a small smile at that. It was a brief gesture, though, one that was quickly replaced with a pained cringe as Rooster started to wipe the blood away from the small cuts and scrapes that littered his face.

“Can’t win ‘em all,” he finally said.

Bradley laughed and nodded. “Can’t argue with that.”

Neither of them said anything more for a few minutes after that. Rooster cleaned and put bandages on Hangman’s face where he needed it. Jake tried to look anywhere but at the man in front of him but there wasn’t much of another option with how close Bradley was leaning. All Jake could do was look at the clench in his jaw, the furrow of focus in his brow. Bradley’s breathing was steady, Jake could feel it with each exhale that fanned across his skin.

“Who knows,” Rooster broke the silence as he moved on from Jake’s face to his hands, “maybe with all the swelling you’ll actually start to look alright.”

Hangman smirked, still holding the frozen bag of veggies to his jaw with the hand that Bradley wasn’t tending to. “First time I’ve heard you say my face needed work.”

He chuckled, smile stretching a little wider as he wiped away the blood from the split knuckles of the other man’s hand. “Got me there.”

When Rooster moved onto Hangman’s other hand, the bag of vegetables got discarded onto the other end of the coffee table. He watched as Rooster’s hands so easily manipulated his own while he worked. “So, this is what you do on leave then?” he asked, the familiar snark returning with each second that passed with Bradley taking care of him.

Rooster stopped everything that he was doing. He tried to look serious but he couldn’t hold the expression on his face long enough as he parroted the question back, “This is what you do on leave?”

Hangman laughed, more relieved than he’d ever admit to being as Rooster went back to putting a bandage on his split knuckle. “Asked you first, Chicken Boy.”

Bradley chuckled, shaking his head as he turned Jake’s hand over so it was palm-up. He dunked the washcloth into the warm water once more before wringing it out and placing it in Jake’s palm. “Wipe the blood out of your hair, Bagman.”

“Not gonna do that for me too?” Jake asked with a smirk, already moving to clean out the bloodied mat on his own.

“I think you’d be better off just,” he made the motion of buzzing it all off with his hand.

Jake rolled his eyes and shook his head. “Not a chance.”

“Yea,” Bradley said as he stood up, collecting up the rest of his things that he’d brought out, “do that and everyone will see how much work your face actually needs.”

Jake was laughing as Bradley disappeared to put the first aid kit back wherever he’d gotten it from. When he’d gotten the blood out of his hair, he stood up and walked over to the kitchen, still limping but feeling much better now that most of his wounds had been licked clean. The bruises that would finish coming in over the next few days weren’t going to be pretty. His cheek and stomach were going to look rough, but it wouldn’t be unmanageable. He tried not to think about it too much as he rinsed the washcloth out in Bradley’s sink.

“Here,” Rooster spoke up when Hangman shut the sink off. He set a t-shirt and a pair of shorts on the counter. “If you want some clothes without your blood on them.”

Jake chuckled, nodding in appreciation as he took the set of clothes. “Thanks.”

Bradley yawned, stretching his arms over his head for a moment before jerking his thumb back over his shoulder. “I’m going to bed. Turn the lights off when you’re done.”

“Not gonna pass back out on the couch?”

Jake asked, picking idly at the hem of the shorts in his hands.

“No,” Bradley started walking away, “but you can now.”

Jake chuckled, shaking his head as he started hitting every light switch he could find to turn the lights off. His limp slowed him down a bit, but not so much that he was too far behind Bradley to hear the tired chuckles he was letting out as he made his way to his bedroom, Jake not too far behind him now.

#top gun #top gun maverick #top gun: maverick #bradley bradshaw #jake seresin #hangman seresin #hangman #rooster bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #jake hangman seresin #top gun fanfiction #bradley bradshaw x jake seresin #jake seresin x bradley bradshaw #my writing #hurt/comfort exchange 2023 #hurt/comfort exchange #hurt/comfort #fanfiction #drabblesmc

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crinkled-emotions · 2 years ago

Note

If you're taking requests from that list you posted for this weekend could I please ask for 6 and 19, maybe for Bradley, or whoever you prefer? I really don't mind xx

I'm so excited for everything you're working on!!❤️❤️❤️❤️

I love this, thanks so much for your patience!!

Those that have sent in requests and I haven't posted them yet- I'm going through some mega writer's block rn but hopefully it'll clear up soon. I do have fics coming soon!

Did I have to make this Hangster? No. Did I make it Hangster?

6. Mumbling into their chest "just hold me" and 19. "that was just a nightmare, it's all okay.

Wrapping his arms around Bradley's waist, Jake gently pressed a kiss to his cheek. In the dark kitchen, shadows from the moon covering them, Bradley looked... tired. Haunted.

"Hey, it's late... early. Are you okay?"

He already knew the answer. Bradley may have been facing the window into their backyard, stone-faced and silent as he leaned on the kitchen sink, but his hands shook when he reached for Jake's and he refused to turn his head. Jake slipped his hand up the back of Bradley's sleep shirt, rubbing his hand over his lower back. He'd always done it, even way back when they'd tried this the first time.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Nope," Bradley murmured, apparently out of his trance now. His shoulders remained tense, his eyes forward, but the more Jake moved his hand the more he began to relax.

"Come back to bed with me," Jake finally whispered softly. Bradley opened his mouth to hesitate, or complain, maybe even start an argument, but his entire body fell forward and he nodded numbly. He let Jake take him by the hand and lead him back upstairs.

"Try to get some sleep, Roos. I love you."

As Bradley rolled on to his side facing away from Jake, he heard the murmured love you too and Jake sighed, burying against the pillow.

The next morning Hangman was on a mission. He kissed Rooster goodbye at the Bronco and beelined for the ready room while Rooster headed for his office to make a start on some paperwork. Of course Maverick was standing by the coffee machine, reading a text while he waited for the liquid gold to brew.

"Mav," Hangman called out. Maverick pocketed his phone, glancing up.

"Hangman, good morning. Have you spoken to-"

"-something's wrong."

Maverick cocked an eyebrow, leaning in to whisper to Hangman conspiratorially.

"Jake; my godson picked you, something must be wrong."

"It's Bradley, sir. Something's wrong with Bradley."

The amused, jovial glint to Maverick's eyes dulled and his eyebrows knitted together. The lines by his eyes, usually indicating a cheeky smile or a mischievous act, now indicated concern.

"Talk to me. What's going on?"

"I woke up and the bed was cold, so I went looking for him. He was standing by the kitchen window and it was 4am, he- he was- he was shaking. Because he's Bradley, he didn't want to talk about it, didn't want to tell me what was wrong, so I- I dragged him back to bed, and he kissed me goodnight, but I think he pretended to be asleep so I didn't bring it up again."

"What about this morning, before work?"

"Same thing; I got up at 6, he pretended he slept in and then he rushed to get ready."

Jake frowned, thinking of the Bronco.

"He blasted 80's music the whole way here."

Maverick winced.

"Okay, that's bad news. Alright, keep an eye on him today. In a professional capacity I can only ground him but that's a last resort. As his godfather, though..."

Maverick suddenly looked like he'd aged about twenty years, and Jake felt that. He hadn't slept all that well after peeling Bradley off the kitchen sink, wanting to listen in case he said something or needed comfort. He knew Bradley reached for his phone somewhere around 5am and had scrolled on tiktok for a bit, but when Jake's alarm went off at 6 he was back to pretending to be asleep. He didn't have the heart to tell him to get up, so when the clock hit 7 and Jake was starting to think Bradley was staying home he'd gone back upstairs to find him frantically getting ready for the day.

"I'll talk to him if I can catch him long enough. At the very least, it'll piss him off enough he'll go to you."

Ah, Maverick. Ever the optimist.

"Thanks, Mav. I really appreciate it. I wouldn't usually do this, I just- I'm worried about him, y'know?"

"I do."

Maverick squeezed Hangman's arm, clearing his throat.

"I think we burned the coffee."

"Fuck."

Maverick knocked on Rooster's office door, poking his head in and sending him a smile.

"Hey, Roos. Got a minute?"

"Only a minute."

Ooh, grumpy pants. Maverick had dealt with worse. Seventeen year old Bradley Bradshaw had been a force of nature... and grief.

Maverick sat on one of the chairs in front of Rooster's desk, clearing his throat.

"Can I ask?"

"Ask what?"

"Is everything okay?"

Rooster huffed, closing the file he'd been writing in as he clenched his fists.

"You talked to Jake?"

"Jake and I had a conversation about someone we love."

"Fantastic. You already know what's going on; what's your prognosis, Doctor Maverick?"

"I don't know. What do you think is going on, Bradley?"

Rooster shrugged, brown eyes firm as he stared his godfather down.

"Was that all, sir?"

"Yeah, Roos, that's all."

"Okay. I need to finish this report."

Maverick knew when he'd been shown the door, despite what others said. He stood, pausing before he exited.

"Hey, Bradley; Jake and I, and the others, we're here for you, okay? No matter what it is, how stupid it feels; you can come to us."

"Thanks, Maverick."

Jake had been asleep all of thirty seconds when he felt hands on his shoulders, frantically shaking him.

"Jake, wake up. Wake up."

His eyes opened and he looked around the room, finally finding Bradley in the darkness.

"Babe? What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"I can't breathe."

Jake frowned, sitting up in bed as he reached for the lamp on his nightstand.

"What?"

With the haze of sleep gone from his mind, he took in Bradley and immediately moved, pulling Bradley to the side of the bed and making him put his feet on the cold floor of their bedroom. With his hand on his partner's back, Jake gently guided him to put his head between his knees.

"Darlin', you can breathe. I think you're having a panic attack, it's okay. I'm right here."

"Jake," Bradley sobbed, one hand reaching up for his boyfriend. Jake grasped it, pressing kisses to his knuckles.

"I know B, I know. It's okay, I'm right here."

For half an hour Jake listened to Bradley gasp for air, sobbing occasionally when it got too much and he couldn't keep it down anymore. When Jake went to shift, stretch his legs considering he'd been sitting in an awkward position since he woke up, Bradley's head had shot up and he reached for Jake, eyes searching for any sign that he was safe.

"Roos, I'm staying, I had a cramp. Do you feel up to lying down?"

After a moment, Bradley slowly nodded. Jake pulled the covers back, damp with sweat, and instead pulled a blanket from the box on the end of the bed. Gently covering Bradley with it, he put a hand on his cheek.

"Okay?"

"Can I tell you about it without you losing your shit?"

Jake snorted, fondly running a hand through his boyfriend's hair.

"I'm worried about you, not angry. If you want to tell me, I'll listen."

Bradley lifted the blanket slightly and Jake got the idea, sliding in with him. His boyfriend, despite his panic, was warm and firm and still the best person to snuggle with despite snoring like a chainsaw.

Listen, we can't all sleep peacefully.

"It started last week. I- I woke up, and... and I could smell smoke. See smoke."

Jake kept his eyes on his boyfriend, sensing the way his body became tense and then relaxed when he could feel Jake's hand on his side.

"I looked over and... I dunno, I think you were in the bathroom, but I couldn't see you. I was so tired, I thought..."

"Oh, Roos..."

Jake scooted closer, surprised at the way that his own chest hurt. Bradley's eyes fell closed against his shoulder and his hands tightened their grip on his shirt.

"M'sorry I couldn't tell you. Ever since then, every time I try to sleep... I just see smoke, and you yelling over comms, and I dream of your jet going down. I've never had this before, I don't- I don't know what to do with it."

"It was just a nightmare, Roos. It's all okay."

Jake pulled away from their hug, brushing a hand over Bradley's cheek. As Bradley's shoulders relaxed, he buried back in against Jake.

"I think we're supposed to talk about it before it gets to this point."

Jake snorted.

"Yeah, okay, that sounds good."

Sighing, he glanced over his shoulder at the alarm clock on his nightstand.

"We should change the sheets... get you cleaned up."

"Just... stay. We can do it in the morning."

Bradley gently pushed Jake on to his back, practically covering him from head to toe.

"Are you gonna be here in the morning?"

"Yeah, Roos. Get some sleep, we'll talk later."

Jake woke up the next morning, sighing in relief at the sound of snoring in his ear. He reached up, brushing his fingers through Bradley's curls.

"I love you," he whispered softly.

#Top Gun: Maverick #Top Gun Maverick #TGM #Bradley Rooster Bradshaw #Bradley Bradshaw #Rooster #Callsign: Rooster #Jake Hangman Seresin #Jake Seresin #Hangman #Callsign: Hangman #Hangster #angst #hurt/comfort

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sachiko6243 · 2 years ago

Text

The good old Doc - Part 4

Missed the start? No problem, here is the first part, the following ones are always linked at the end, so you dont have to search endlessly. 😉

This is a series which is currently in the making, so I don’t exactly know how long it is going to be. 😊

Word count: 2605

Warnings: PTSD flashback, grafic description of death and injury, Minors DNI

The following days were filled with nothing particularly interesting. I was mostly to be found in my office, reading through the teams files, memorizing their medical backstory in case I needed to work without having them with me. It was nothing that would be expected from me, since I had a small tablet with all the infos I needed to work. Medical files, contact infos, testaments and if we would have a mission also the mission report and notes. But I liked to be prepared. Serving in Afghanistan as my first deployment taught me the hard way how important it was to always be up to date the old fashioned way. I lost a good man, to not knowing his allergies and he was out like a light, not being able to tell them. His team also not being able to remember it, he had an allergic reaction to penicillin, resulting in him dying. After a short investigation it was deemed a work accident and I was cleared from any charges, but it stuck with me, shaping the way I worked.

A knock on my door interrupted me. Looking up I was just quick enough to dodge the paper ball being thrown at me. “If you leave the door open like that, you need to work on your attention skills.” Hangman and the rest of the team were standing in the small hallway in front of my office. “What you want, Blondie?” I asked closing the files on my desk. He walked up to me, studying my desk like a hawk. “You stalkin’ us?” He said nodding towards the tower of files.

“Ah yes. What would my day be without your smug face staring up at me from a file.” I rolled my eyes getting up. “No. I am learning your infos by heart. Someone needs to know, if we get in trouble.”

“Don’t you have a tablet for things like that?” Payback asked.

“I do. But last time I trusted on that I lost a man. Not making the same mistakes twice. So, whats so important you interrupt me potentially saving your live one day?” Walking around the desk I opened the door of my safe, putting the files back. “We want you to come to the hangar. Show you our playground. You need to be familiar with it, one day you might be relying on it.” Bob leaned around Coyote and Phoenix. “Lead the way, Bobby.” I grinned, taking my cup of tea in one hand the tablet in the other.

“What happened when you lost that man?” Bob asked, slowing down to walk next to me. Now I was surrounded by aviators. Payback and Coyote in the front, Bob and Phoenix next to me, Hangman and Rooster trailing behind. I felt like the president being guarded to the air force one. “He got shot on one mission. We were evacuating a certain area in Kabul, being called back by our Commander. Right as we were loading the helicopters we got ambushed. T-Bone got hit in the shoulder. Nothing I haven’t dealt with before and nothing he wasn’t used to. He was quiet the man, if you like, earning his name, because he bombed a cow on accident. Don’t know how, but he mistook it as a threat. Like I said, the wound was manageable. What I didn’t know to that time, was I took a hit as well. To the vest, but still. My tablet got destroyed, and therefore I wasn’t able to read into his file, searching for allergies. He was allergic to penicillin. Died still in the helicopter from the reaction mixed with the blood loss and shock his body obtained. I got under investigation; they signed it off as work accident and I was off the hook. But I felt guilty for not knowing such a viable thing. That’s when I decided to learn the files of my team by heart.”

The group was silent for a moment. “I don’t want to be rude, but I kinda am glad, that that happened and you are now a better Doc for us.” Coyote said from the front, holding the side door of the hangar open for everyone. “T-Bone would have said the same.” I smiled, remembering the tall, bulky mountain of a man. He looked like the absolute madman he was in the field, but at heart he was a sweet little kitten. Always making jokes, lifting the spirit of everyone around. Losing him was like losing the backbone of the team.

“So that’s our home!” Hangman announced, wrapping an arm around me, guiding me trough the jets. In front of one he stopped. “And that, sweet cheeks, is my lady. The one woman I swore true love to.” I chuckled at his words, letting my fingers stroke over the nose of his jet. “Who knew all it takes the big boy to kneel is 1.700 gallons of fuel and Mach 1.8.”

“I need a wild child to satisfy me.” He answered, looking at my face. Searching for a reaction to his flirting. I didn’t react to it, not wanting him to drive home a win.

Phoenix interrupted our stare of. “Leave your things on the table there. Maverick is flying a test run. He is about to cross us. You have to see that, feel the pressure of it. Its amazing!” She was grinning like a child on Christmas, pulling me towards the big gate. I left my things on the table following her and the rest outside. Putting my sunglasses on my nose I starred in the sky, waiting for Maverick to fly over us. And that he did. Low and fast. Breaking the sound barrier with a loud smack, that I could feel deep inside my bones.

What I didn’t expect my body to do, was crumble to the floor and snap into a flashback to Afghanistan.

The explosion of a booby trap leaped the truck in front of us in the air. Fire, surrounding us, when our Humvee, crashed through it. A second explosion, hitting us like a brick wall. The car got rolled over, flipping several times, before it stopped on its roof. Around me the marines started to hustle, kicking out the doors and seeping out of the truck like ants. Clearing the surroundings, they pulled me out, pushing my head down and running for cover. My hands clasped at the medical bag, mindlessly throwing it on my back. My vision was minimized to the man in front of me. Left hand on his shoulder, fight hand pulling my gun out of my holster.

Bullets snarled through the air, whipping up the sand around us on impact. I heard yelling and screams of pain. Forever burning inside my ears. With a soft thud, the man in front of me fell, blood seeping out of his throat, forcing me to stumble over him to keep going. Speeding up to close the lines I reached for the next guy in row. Apex. An older marine in his early fourties. “Get your head clear, Doc!” He yelled at me. “You hear me? Head clear. Focus. Work!” Finally snapping out of my panicked state I looked up. “Yes, Commander.” I rasped, rolling down on the floor in a flat hole on the ground. It wasn’t much, but it was manageable to return fire.

He pushed an M-16 in my hands and handed me two magazines. “You know how to use it?” His words were hard and strict, expecting no objection. “Yes, Sir.” I holstered my hand gun, checking the bigger weapon in my hand. Fully loaded, two spare magazines. 90 bullets. Shifting the knob to half automatic I rolled on my stomach, aiming out on the exploded Humvees. Luckily the Taliban weren’t as coordinated as our marines, so I was able to shoot down two, before they could react. My hands were shake, making it hard to keep the machine gun steady. “Relax, Lieutenant. Breathe, aim, shoot. Just like we taught you. If you want out of here, you better function.” Commander Lewis, wasn’t one to be sensible about things. A strict, but wise leader.

Following his advise, I took a deep breath, holding it for a few seconds, shooting a round. Breathing out of my mouth. It wasn’t the right way of handling a gun. In basic training, they tell you to breathe through the shots, let them run through your body, feel the impact. But I didn’t trust myself enough to follow the rules. My survival instincts kicking in. In my childhood I was a kid to run from threats, but now I was forced to fight it. Every fiber of my body screamed to run, get up and run. But I couldn’t. The Taliban had made out our position. Sending their waves of bullets over our heads. I could feel it. Feel the way they ripped through the air, the small winds they produced. Next to me another marine, emptied his magazine, lifting his body to reach for his spare one.

That’s when it hit him. Right in the face. Just inches from his helmet. I saw it happen in slow motion. The way his head snapped back. The back of his skull breaking from the pressure build inside of it. Blood and brain tissue splattering over his back, his legs, the sand, my face. I pushed down a scream, shuffling over to his body. Searching it for his spare magazines. Three in numbers. Putting one inside my gear, I handed Apex the other two. Ignoring the way, the warm blood ran down my face, made its way through the corner of my lips. Tasting metallic and sweet. The marine, I didn’t know the name of, laying on the ground. Head turned to me. Face half smashed in. The left eye open and covered in blood.

I turned my gaze away. Concentrating again on the enemies in front of me. Firing round after round. Pressing myself down, every time they threw a grenade, hoping it would miss. Put this one didn’t. It landed between me and Apex, laying there signing a song of its upcoming danger. Apex reacted faster than I did. Grabbing the ball of death and yanking it back to where it came from. I could just stare at him. He touched it. Threw it. I saw his mouth moving, not registering he what he was saying. The ringing sound of the explosion still running through my brain. “Move!” Suddenly his voice forced its way into my head. That’s when I registered the rain of bullets had subsided. Leaving us room to make a run. Jumping to my feet I ran. Following Apex. Trusting him he would know where to go.

But I wasn’t lucky.

A sharp pain shot through my left thigh. Knees buckling. Falling to the ground. Apex turned around, signaling his man to go, lifting me up over his right side, switching the weapon to his left. Instantly two of our men were behind us, running backwards, following my cries of pain. “Whats the first rule of the marines?” Apex barked.

“Never leave a man behind, Sir.” I answered.

“Then start working. You are one of us. Do your deed of getting us out!” I knew he was trying to get my thoughts off of the bullet hole in my leg, but hearing it made something snap in me. As if he opened up a secret chamber full of determination and power.

I grabbed my weapon harder, lifting as much weight on my left leg as possible, helping him carry me. But it was to late. Another rain of bullets, flew at us. Taking down the two men behind. Hitting me in my right shoulder and Apex in the back. Stumbling to the ground he buried me under him. Unable to move properly I tried to fight my way out, shove him off me. Without any success. His eyes were glossy. Looking without direction. Dead.

The shadows of veiled man, creeping closer. With one last cry I tried to wriggle free. Again, no success. A voice snarled in a language I didn’t understand. Probably a local accent of Arabic. Two men lifted Apex from my body. Another one pulled me up at my arm. I screamed in pain, before I blacked out.

My scream ripped me from my flashback. I found myself clinging to Hangman, half sitting half laying on the floor. He was holding me, kneeling in front of me, speaking to me. I just starred at him. Eyes wide, tears streaming down my face, panic written over my face. It wasn’t until then, that his words forced themselves through my mushed brain. “Its alright. You are safe. I am here. Nothing will hurt you. We will protect you.” Over and over, he repeated the words, waiting for me to react. And I did, fully pressing me into his chest I began to sob heavily.

“Apex.” I stuttered. “He is dead. Everyone is dead. I need to get out… get out.”

“Relax, Lilith. You are in San Diego. Top gun navy base.” Jake started to wipe away my tears.

“San Diego.” I repeated. “Safe.”

“Yes. Safe.” He affirmed. “You want to tell me, what happened?”

“I… I was back in Afghanistan. We were ambushed on the way to the airport. Two booby traps. The first Humvee exploded like it was nothing. Ours got just turned to the back. I killed people. I don’t know how many. They screamed. My men screamed. Apex pulled me out of it, getting me to coverage. He was my Commander. But then… Another marine got shot next to me. His face… all gone. We made a run. I got shot. In the leg, than in the shoulder. Apex took the most bullets. He was dead before he hit the ground. I was buried underneath him. Could feel him bleed out into my clothes. Than they took me. I am going to be tortured. They will hurt me! Apex…”

“No, darlin. No. You are safe. They cant hurt you anymore, okey?” Jake shook me, to get my attention. “We will get you home now, okay? Home. Safe.” “Safe.” I nodded. Letting him pull me into a stand. My knees were still shaky, so I held onto his arms. Sighting he picked me up. Now I was hanging from his arms like a toddler from its parent. Arms around the shoulder, legs hooked around his waist. “Get her stuff.” He said, to someone I didn’t see. Then he started walking, towards the exit. On the way out we ran into Admiral Simpson.

“What happened?” He was next to us immediately. “Is she alright?”

“She is fine. Physically at least. She got a flashback to Afghanistan, when Maverick crossed us. I will bring her home, if that’s alright.” Jake answered for me. “Can I take off the day as well? Look out for her?”

“I… You have things to do…” Simpson argued, but stopped once he saw my grip on Jake getting stronger. “Okay. Take her home. Take today and Friday off. I don’t want to see her over the weekend at the base until Monday. Am I clear?” Straightening up, Jake answered: “Yes, Sir. Of course, Sir.” Cyclone waved us off. Carrying me to his car, he nodded to what seemed to be Payback, who waited with my bag packed next to Jakes car. Carefully he set me into the passenger seat. Plucking my arms and legs from his body, buckling me in. Phoenix told him my address, squeezing my hand, before she closed the door.

#top gun hangman #jake hangman seresin #hangman x reader #flashback #hurt/comfort #tw ptsd

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