#How are they gonna survive without her goddamn........ | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

frankenstein-ate-my-left-shoe · 6 months ago

Text

@steddieangstyaugust Day 31 - Speaking Saturday: "I'm not going to beg you to love me."

i’m challenging myself to keep all these at either 127 or 1,270 words each, see day one for more of an explanation!

“You can’t keep going on like this, Eddie! You’re gonna die, you’ve gotta find them, tell them!”

Eddie hacks another horrible cough. Three petals fall into his hand this time. “Uh huh.”

The cough started not long after Eddie’d been deemed fully recovered and fully cleared of all wrongdoing in the spring break murders.

It started light at first, Eddie brushing it off as getting used to smoking again, but it’d just gotten worse.

After a good couple weeks of solid cough, Steve finally saw a petal.

All Eddie’s attempts at squirreling them away successful until that moment.

Eddie had contracted Hanahaki. Love blossoms, Death thorns.

And he’d staunchly refused any conversation about confessing to whoever it was he was stuck on, who he was literally dying over.

"Why are you being such an idiot about this?!”

“I’m being realistic, Steve.” Every breath sounds like it’s going through a cheese grater.

“Realis– Eddie. You. Are. Going. To. Die.”

“Yep.”

“And you’re okay with that?”

That finally seems to set him off, “Of course I’m not! I’m fucking pissed that this is my lot in life. I survived the bats, the infections, the goddamn people of this town, and now it’s my stupid, lovesick heart that does me in?? I’m livid!”

Eddie hacks another cough, folding up on the bed with the force of them. A pile of ten blood-spattered petals sit on his lap by the end of his fit.

“So why not try?” Steve asks when Eddie’s breathing levels back out to its new normal level of wheezing. “If you’re already resigned yourself to dying, what’s the harm in telling them?”

Eddie studies him, his dark eyes are bloodshot, watering still from the coughs, then closes his eyes and shakes his head yet again.

“Damn it, Eddie.” Steve drops his head into his palms, “Do you think this is fun for us? Watching you wither away like this?” He picks his head back up, “Do you think Wayne is enjoying knowing that he got you back from the dead once only for you to turn around and walk back towards it?”

“I’m not going to do it, Steve, so stop.”

“No, this is asinine and you know it, Munson!”

Eddie’s face twists up in anger, “I’m not going to beg you to love me!”

Every fiber of Steve’s being freezes in place. His heart stops, his feet are made of ice.

Then, his head, blissfully quiet for only a moment, swirls back into a frenzy.

What?! Me?! I’m the one causing thi—

“I want you to leave.” Eddie’s whisper cuts his thoughts short.

“Huh?”

“Leave.”

“Eddie, no, wait, just let me–”

“Go, Steve!”

Steve’s legs pick him up in an instant. “Eddie, I—”

“I said leave, Harrington! Get the fuck out of my hou—” a fit of coughs breaks into his speech, and this time, Eddie reaches for the bucket, spewing his meager breakfast and bile into the bottom along with at least ten more petals. A final heave, and a whole rose makes an appearance.

Once done, he spits a couple times, then without looking up, says, “Go. Now.”

So he does.

He walks down the hall and to the front door in a daze, his thoughts swirling.

Eddie’s in love with him?

He– Him?? Steve Harrington? He’s like, the complete opposite of what Eddie should be into.

He’s driving now, not sure where he’s going.

But why? Why him? How is Steve supposed to help him??

That’s why he didn’t want to tell you, dipshit.

Of course.

The car pulls into Robin’s driveway.

What is he supposed to do now? He’s got to save Eddie’s life somehow, right?

“Dingus, what are you doing here?”

“I’m why Eddie’s dying.”

Robin’s expression shifts, she pulls him into the house and up the stairs to her room.

Steve sinks down onto the edge of her mattress. “Robin, Eddie’s in love with me. I’m his Hanahaki.”

“I know, I know,” She says, patting his back, “He told me.”

“What am I supposed to do?”

“There’s nothing you can do, Steve. Not unless you suddenly have a whole new preference in partners.”

Steve sits with that a moment. Did he? Eddie’s a good-looking guy, sure, that’s just objective. But…. he thinks about kissing Eddie, how his lips would feel against his, about the times he’d seen him naked while helping him recover, about how he’d feel against him..

Nothing.

Steve doesn’t want to kiss Eddie. Doesn’t want to do anything more with the imagined naked man in his head other than find him some clothes after helping get him clean and changing his bandages.

He loves the guy, sure, but it’s only maybe more than how much he loves Jonathan. Meaning he’s on the Steve Scale of Caring just under all the shitheads.

“No. I don’t.”

Robin heaves a sigh, “Yeah, figured as much. What’d Eddie say when you told him?”

“..Told him what?”

“That you don’t feel that way about him.”

“I didn’t.”

“You didn’t?”

Steve shrugs.

“You didn’t tell him you don’t have feelings for him?”

“I didn’t tell him anything. He didn’t let me.” He tells Robin what Eddie said, about throwing up and demanding he leave right after.

“What? What’s with the face?” “We have to get back to Eddie’s.” Robin shoots up, grabbing her back and pulling on some socks.

Steve follows, “What? What do you mean?”

“How many did he throw up? How many petals?”

“Uh, I dunno, ten maybe? A whole flower came out at the end.”

Robin’s eyes go wide, “Oh no.”

A rock sinks heavily into Steve’s stomach, “What’s “Oh no.”?”

“Let’s go!!”

She pulls him down the steps and back out the door, barely managing to pull her shoes on.

“Gotta hurry! We've got to get back to Forest Hills!”

So he steps on it, not quite sure what the huge rush is, but Robin’s expression tells him it’s serious.

“What is happening, Rob, why am I hurrying?” He asks desperately, screeching around the last corner.

“You rejected him, It’s going to take hold even faster now!”

Steve feels like throwing up, he presses his foot down even harder.

“I didn’t though. I didn’t say anything!”

“I don’t think it matters,” Robin says, flinging open the passenger door.

Steve follows, hopping up the porch steps and through the back door just behind her.

Her gasp doesn’t bode well. “Oh no.”

He pushes past her, into Eddie’s room.

“Holy shit… Eddie!”

Eddie’s curled up on his side facing them in the door, paler than even an hour ago, chest barely moving.

There’s thick thorny vines snaking out of his face. two out his mouth, one out his right nostril, all three covered in beautiful, bloody white roses.

The blooms do their best to cover his face, but his scrunched brow can still be seen.

“Eddie..” Steve whispers, reaching for his cheek.

He doesn’t touch him however, Robin’s voice startling him from down the hall, “Hello? Yes, Hi, I need an ambulance please, it’s thorns!”

Steve doesn’t know what to do.

He wants to yank the stems out, he wants to pick Eddie up and run him to the hospital himself.. But he’s frozen.

All he can do is stare down at the slowly decreasing rate of movement of Eddie’s chest, and listen as the sirens get closer.

—

He’s in a coma.

The beeping has been sounding in Steve’s head for weeks now, sat at Eddie’s bedside.

The vines are gone, held back by medication, but it’s only prolonging the inevitable.

“I hate you.” Steve lies.

The scratching in his throat is getting stronger.

🙃🙃🙃🙃

this is it!! the last day of Angsty August!! i can't believe i've posted something for every single day this month, holy shit

i'd say i'm not going to do this ever again, but i want to write something for every day in @steddie-spooktober so i'll see y'all then 😅

see the collection on tumblr | on AO3!

#steddieangstyaugust #steve harrington #eddie munson #steveddie #eddeve #hanahaki #hanahaki disease #speaking saturday #noelle writes

51 notes · View notes

auguryofjellyfish · 24 days ago

Text

more actual thoughts about yesterday's episodes

this tetro friday was unreal...it felt like a dream. it was beautiful.

[Open Sky] and [Young Forever] genuinely took my breath away. I already liked Ojima a lot, but these made his character finally, fully click for me, and my love for him automatically rose tenfold...OJIMA...! I Get It Now....and it feels so much like he's on his way out. out of him and Hiroaki, it would be more devastating for the other if Ojima died, so that's my metric lol. everyone knows these two aren't staying together. I'm gonna be so devastated if/when Ojima dies..i need him to be okay....i need him to finally begin to confront his trauma, for his own sake...Ojima...!

Wada was a delight as always...him carrying the lily everywhere...so precious...Book Club....2!!!! was super fun, I loved the delivery of "dumb", and loved him playing Yanagi's therapist. I don't really vibe with Yanagi as a character that much, so I needed this insight into him...If my man dies before him and Mai make up, istg. Hiroaki seems to have regained some will to live! I love him being smart and trying to have better chances at survival. Tamba was heartbreaking, I NEED her to be a survivor....and Mai...seemed...weird, to me. just weird. on the surface she's acting the same, but her actions just... something's off. that ain't it. she was really...really affected by Kan's torture even if she doesn't show it that much.

And Moko, of course...man...she needs to raze this whole institute to the ground. I'm loving her development...

Ken.

I miss Ken, so much. I miss him almost as much as the characters who actually died. HE acts like he's already dead. it's been 2 days in-universe so I'm not expecting him to be okay. but god, I MISS him.

I miss him as much as Kamimura. he was there for 40 seconds and then dipped. he sounded SO rough, barely even there. what is he even doing all day? staring at the ceiling, endlessly ruminating on his feelings?

I miss him to death...it's so goddamn empty without him. he and Kamimura didn't have eps together every single week, but most of them, yeah. I miss their episodes.

"we don't know him, what could we even talk about" I dunno guys....are there right things to talk about with a not-very-social-and-not-outgoing guy who's gone through something like this? like, they know that he and Kamimura were very close, with eeeeeveryone repeating on and on how They Were Always Together. I would be afraid of fucking up too, or awkwardness, or whatever else. but good god, it's better to just keep trying and fuck up than to leave him be. even just as a precaution, cause people who are alone might be plotting something! even out of pragmaticism, because they need his smarts and knowledge! any reason is good.

I wonder if Ken has ever been this alone. he strikes me as a kinda guy who, no matter how lonely he is, always knows that at least he has his family at the end of the day. he can have no one else, he can shut himself in his room, but he always knows that he will have someone there for him when he comes out.

and they- no one cleaned up the blood! seriously? Ken probably hasn't been upstairs, but when he finds out he's gonna flip the fuck out. Tsuno maybe would have been forgiving, she wouldn't want for people to push themselves over their limits for her...but Kamimura... I understand why nobody wants to do it, but goddamn, you have to...you can't just leave a big chunk of him just splattered around in a closet, he would really, really HATE it. the mess itself, the stench, the fact that it's him. he lived with his parents' decomposing bodies for 2 days, how would he feel knowing people are just breathing in the smell of his blood constantly?

"somebody will do it at some point" if that somebody's gonna be Ken, I swear...

Ken..please come back to us. 🙏

#tetro danganronpa pink #blakewords

21 notes · View notes

mothwingwritings · 2 years ago

Note

Ok ok ok. Hear me out. I had an idea about what happened after the series. (Apologies in advance if this is cringe, I try my best 😔)

After reading the mini series of Yujiro being a Step Father™️ and after the last part of the series (Goddamn that was brutal 😭), I couldn’t help but think about how in the end he was like “expect to see me around often-.” LIKE HELLO?!

This man is really gonna pull up to the dojo, where his bbg stepdaughter is at, not giving a shit if all of the guys are glaring at him and Katsumi, Jack, and Baki are literally about to pounce on him for what he did- nah nah, I could see him giving them a nasty smile and asking about where you’re at.

No one says anything and this man has the audacity to be like, “awww is my baby girl recovering from the (censored) that I gave her? It seems she’s gonna need a few more rounds of (censored) with daddy before she can take more of my (censored) without being a lil bitch.”

And then the protective trio are jumping this mf, seeing red and trying to beat the shit out of him.

But sadly, the ogre is demolishing them all and everyone’s too scared to move to step in. He’s especially pummeling Katsumi, taking pleasure in his blood soaking his fists.

It’s only until you come out on wobbly legs, that you plead for him to stop beating up the love of your life.

The ogre only gives you a disappointed look, before saying “now if you weren’t hiding, this would have been avoided. Look what you did you silly girl, this is all YOUR fault.” He just loves to gaslight istg.

You’re over his shit, wanting him to leave and not hurt your loved ones again. “What do you want?”

With the same bloody hands that he used to demolish your lover, he pulls out a black box and gets down on one knee.

Everyone is fucking gasping, they’re watching in horror as he lifts up the top to reveals a shiny Diamond ring.

Baki and Jack are watching helplessly as their sister gets puts in a horrible situation, they wish to intervene. But they’re too weak to move.

The ogre flashes you a slimy smile, one that makes you take a step back.

“Will you marry me? And have my baby?”

The sound of someone throwing up rings out throughout the tense silence.

"So what'll it be," he leers at you wickedly, Katsumi's crumpled body discarded at his feet, "You gonna accept your position like a good girl, or do you need me to keep putting on a show for you?"

You went numb, your limbs collapsing under your weight as you crashed to the ground. Distantly you could make out your brothers screaming something in the background, a warning or possibly a threat, it sounded too muffled to tell.

All you could focus on was Katsumi's bruised and broken face, so puffed up and bloody you could scarcely tell it was the man you loved. His chest still rose and fell, bringing you brief comfort knowing he was still alive. But how long would that be the case? Would he survive if you told Yujiro no?

Tears cascaded down your cheeks as you shifted you focus to the gaudy, massive rock presented to you. It was just as ostentatious as the man who offered it, a vile checkmate you could not escape from.

"All it will take is one word to end this," Yujiro's voice was stern, his predatory gaze drinking in your misery with glee, "I'll even be nice and let you choose if you get a happily ever after or not, princess."

GOD THIS WOULD BE AWFUL AAAHHH. Like, can you imagine? All that hell you went through, your loved ones doing all they can to build you back up and protect you, AND THEN THIS?

Dreadful. The worst. Horrid. I absolutely love it.

This was not cringe at all and I adored it, ty anon for making me (and now everyone else) suffer so deliciously. <3

#i love this thank you #I just love the suffering #loool #yujiro hanma x y/n #yujiro hanma x reader #yandere baki the grappler #yandere yujiro hanma #stepcest cw #he is such a dreadful fuck #mothwrites #baki the grappler x reader

262 notes · View notes

cressthebest · 9 months ago

Text

Crimson Rivers thoughts pt. 32

chapter 51:

1. remus misses sirius and honestly they can make a person feel so fucking single, jesus christ

2. i like how remus is like “reg is james’…. boyfreind????? fiancé????? it would feel too disrespectful to ask atp”

3. “You can love Regulus, or anyone, so much you break the fucking scale, but…some people just don't know how to love themselves, and they have to learn that.” FUCKING PREACH REMUS

4. god, james is talking about how regulus thinks he doesn’t know how to love, when in reality, he loves so hard that he’s willing to die. and AHHHHH

5. 🧍🏻evan jumpscare

6. remus and james friendship >>>>>>>>>>>>

7. petition to reunite lily and remus

8. “Without a word of warning, [Pandora] brings Remus' hand to her mouth to press a quick, gentle kiss to the back of his fingers, then does the same thing to James. Remus feels his ears go hot, because he knows what that means, a Hallow gesture for deep admiration. No ones ever done that to him before, so he's a bit flustered by it, admittedly”

AWWWWW

9. “James, in love with a death eater. Who would have thought?” reading this line feels like such a jump scare. i’m the image of one of those really scared cats where their hair and tail is spiky

10. i’m honestly hoping that everyone can just make it to lily’s rescue. like plsss nobody else die. i love you all

11. “Sirius is currently complaining about the fact that he can't see the moon at night, tipping his head back and boldly requesting McGonagall personally to hang it in the sky just for him.” LMAOOO SIRIUS YOURE SO FUNNY AND I HOPE YOU KNOW THAT

12. “”He's my best friend," Sirius announces slowly, like Regulus is an idiot who can't understand basic concepts.

Regulus arches an eyebrow. "He's my fiancé."”

LMAOOO THIS IS SO FUNNY reg just took the words fiancé and fucking RAN with it

13. AWWW i love how excited sirius is for reg that he’s engaged to james!! he loves his brother so much!!

14. “Regulus huffs and rolls his eyes to the sky, literally begging for patience. "I said: would you marry me? He said: yes. Very simple. Asked, answered, engaged."

"You—" Sirius abruptly starts giggling, and Regulus stares at him blankly. "Oh, Regulus. Regulus. That's not—it's—okay, so you do realize that agreeing that you would get married is not the same as agreeing to get married, yeah?"

"No, I'm pretty sure they're the same," Regulus replies.”

i’m CACKLING

15. “Regulus bursts out. "I want you to keep being an idiot until you're old and ugly, and I want you to come to my fucking wedding!"” ☺️☺️ siblings

16. “"First of all, I would be old and beautiful," Sirius states firmly, holding up a finger. "I am going to be sexy until the day I die, even if I could live until a hundred. Second of all, I will be at the wedding. In spirit. Have it at night under my star. Or just—I don't know, slap a picture of me on a chair and—"”

😭😭😭 he knows he’s gonna be a hot old man. me also like, he’s so funny plss i love him

17. “Did [James] know he was engaged prior to Regulus announcing it when he sent the bagel? No. Is he going to protest it? Also no.” 😭😭

18. 😦😦 they were just talking about weddings and now reg is probably about to drown via crimson river. FUCK THIS

19. “People are born to live, and destined to die. Regulus doesn't care about destiny.” godDAMN

20. sirius helped him climb out with rope. they’re safe. it’s all good. i KNOW he has a pov but i was still so worried for him

21. 😧 my dear. flipping off the sky will NOT help you survive longer. they will just try to kill you more painfully.

22. 😭😭 not zar saying this was a lighter chapter cause he’s comparing it to the previous one. babes. reg’s worst nightmare just occurred again 😭😭

#marauders #regulus black #james potter #jegulus #sirius black #remus lupin #crimson rivers

48 notes · View notes

pico-farad · 5 months ago

Text

This Time on Yu-Gi-Oh Vrains Analysis: How the Fuck Did Aoi's Writing Get Worse

Got sidetracked by GX Week, but I'm back to talk about Aoi again, because oh boy...

So for season 1, I'd heard the rumors of how they screwed her over, and they were mostly in line with the ways I expect Yugioh female characters to be failed by the writers. Overall I still liked Aoi and, while I found some decisions distasteful, I didn't think the actual quality of her writing was worse than other characters'.

Aoi's writing in season 2 is several times worse than it was in season 1. It's truly a disaster, amateurish and baffling, in a way that I think most viewers don't even consciously realize. And while it may not be the worst moment in Yugioh -- it is, in my opinion, the worst writing I've ever seen in Yugioh.

Anyway, that's how I wrote 4k words descending into Aoi madness. Enjoy!

---

Before I begin, a fair warning: I'm gonna say some harsh things in this post. Because being mean is funny, and I deserve it after what I just watched.

But I also want say up front that I don't think the Vrains writers are bad writers, and I still have respect for them. Writing for children's television is grueling work that I could never do, and there are many reasons why bad art is released into the world besides simple writing skill. Vrains clearly had a troubled production, and I have other suspicions about why it turned out the way it did. If there's interest, I think that could be its own post, too.

Also, I refer to the "writers" in this post when I criticize Vrains's storytelling, but to be clear, directors, producers, storyboarders, and others can have just as much influence over the show's story as writers, or even more so. I use the term writers for convenience's sake.

Without further ado...

⇀ Losing My Mind Immediately

Akira lets Aoi go into the restricted area, which nobody has ever returned from.

Ahem... WHO ARE YOU??? Why is Akira, overprotective onii-san numero uno, extremely willing to put his sister on house arrest for her own safety, has never given Aoi his permission to fight, suddenly letting her go off into a danger zone with a 0% survival rate, right after she lost to Spectre immediately in the Tower of Hanoi conflict.

Oh, so now you think she's capable? Why???

Not only that, they make Ghost Girl be the one to say it's too dangerous for her. What?? Ghost Girl is the one who encouraged Aoi to sneak out and into the danger zone in season 1. These are literally the last two characters who would say these things to Aoi.

Then, when they enter the restricted area, Aoi immediately gives up her emergency logout program to an NPC. Normally I'd brush this off. Naivety being used to emphasize female characters' moral virtuosity is passé, but it's not a big deal. It wouldn't be, if the next 30 seconds didn't make me completely go off the rails. This is the speech that is possibly the worst writing, line by line, that I have ever seen in Yugioh.

Roll the tape...

Aoi: Recent events have taught me that I'm still a child. I took on Hanoi for my brother, but look how that turned out. I troubled everyone, and they needed to save me. I was full of myself, thinking I can do anything on my own, but in truth, the world is full of people and we're all connected. Everyone saved me. So this time, I want to save everyone. I'll become stronger, so this time, I'll do everything I can!

Literally none of these sentences make sense... Half of them aren't even true. It reads like ChatGPT asked to write a shonen speech -- the facade of being inspiring, but ultimately empty and nonsensical.

"I took on Hanoi for my brother," This is blatantly false. She had a whole goddamn episode focused on why she decides to fight Hanoi, it's her duel with Baira, and it's specifically about how she's not doing this for her brother, she's not doing this for herself, she's doing this for everyone. If anything, she disregards her brother in order to fight Hanoi.

Blue Angel: I learned something from my duels. When people believe in you, you're fighting for everyone. So I will fight for everyone from now on!

Sound familiar? It's the same goddamn thing she's saying right now, "this time, I want to save everyone." Why are they framing this as Aoi having a new realization, having learned her lesson? What they demonstrate with this is that Aoi hasn't learned her lesson. The reason she lost to Spectre is because trying to save everyone includes trying to save him, and he takes advantage of her naivety.

Blue Angel: You're the same as me... When you were alone, you sought love, and Blue Angel's blue is the ultimate love! Blue Angel will descend into your heart, and save your soul! Spectre: Really? *bows mockingly* Please, then, save my soul!

Naively trying to save others is exactly what she's doing right now, by thoughtlessly giving away her emergency logout in a place that nobody has ever returned from. Her character has gone completely backwards. I said in my last post that losses are good because we get to see characters grow -- I stand by the opinion that they could have made the Spectre loss work -- but they've bungled it on three different levels. She loses horribly, then they retcon her reason for losing, in order to make her character regress.

Apparently, the real reason Aoi lost to Spectre, is because "she was full of herself, thinking she could do anything on her own." I'm so mad. First of all, Aoi clearly wasn't acting on her own and never thought she was, Go and Yusaku were both fighting Hanoi too. Why are they acting like Aoi lost because of hubris?

You know who thought he could do everything on his own? Yusaku. But clearly he didn't need to learn that "the world is full of people and we're all connected." He clearly believed the opposite, because he did everything by himself and tried to reject allyship at every turn and yet lo and behold, he hasn't lost a single duel.

"Everyone saved me. So this time, I want to save everyone." NO, LITERALLY ONE PERSON SOLO'D HANOI, AND EVERYONE ELSE DID JACK SHIT. This resolution that Aoi comes to not only regresses her character, but it makes no goddamn sense. Who is the everyone you're talking about, Aoi? Are they in the room with us right now?

Who am I kidding, it's obvious who the "everyone" is, because as she says it, the clip that plays is Akira's manpain as Aoi gets turned into data. Because even in this moment that has nothing to do with Akira, the writers cannot resist bending Aoi's character to revolve around how much she loves her beloved onii-san, even though it makes no sense in this context of trying to save a random NPC.

Frankly, the whole "everyone saved me" also makes no sense in the context of trying to save a random NPC. But like, even less sense than that, because the actual context of this "heartfelt" shonen speech is that she's trying to get Ghost Girl to give up her emergency logout button. Ghost Girl, established to be self-serving and willing to throw others under the bus to advance herself. Why does this speech convince her? It doesn't even have anything to do with her.

Great, so now not only have they botched Aoi's character, but for the rest of the show, Ghost Girl is stripped of the characteristics that actually made her engaging.

If they wanted Aoi to convince Ghost Girl to give up her escape program and become more selfless, it's simple. Have her say, "We saved you." Ghost Girl wouldn't be standing here right now, if Aoi and the others hadn't risked everything to save everyone.

There's more I could pick on about these 30 seconds, like how the writers aren't content with handing Aoi a humiliating loss, but they also make her act like she deserved to be "humbled" by that experience: "Recent events have taught me that I'm still a child," "I troubled everyone, and they needed to save me." It's like they're not content with infantilizing her in the narrative, they need to make sure she infantilizes herself.

Which brings me back to the point about Aoi's "hubris." Because what is implied by saying that Aoi lost because of hubris when nothing she said or did suggested that, is that it was hubris for Aoi to fight at all. It was hubris for Aoi, and the audience, to believe she could do anything. Which is just maddening.

And to top it all off, to add insult to indignity to injury to insanity, she finishes her speech by saying, "I'll become stronger! This time, I'll do everything I can!"

AND THEN. SHE LOSES. IN THE NEXT EPISODE.

This speech reads like a bad influencer apology. First they "admit" their mistake (that Blue Angel didn't do anything in the Hanoi fight), then they deflect and change the story about what actually happened (it's because she was being full of herself! That's definitely why she lost), and finally they promise to do better (don't worry, this season, Aoi will get stronger and get some wins!), but they don't.

I can talk more about how the writers give Aoi shallow girlboss speeches instead of actually demonstrating her strength in duels, but that will come when I talk about Blue Maiden.

Right now... it's time to talk about Blue Girl vs. Soulburner.

⇀ What's in a re-introductory duel?

Something that's pretty standard in Yugioh is the concept of the season 2 "re-introductory duel." Think Shou's promotion duel in GX, the filter episodes that came before the World Grand Prix arc started, the Sector Security battle royale in Arc-V. They can be story-relevant, or completely filler, but the point is to re-familiarize you with the main supporting characters. If you look at the first 10 episodes of a Yugioh season 2, you'll generally see all the main supporting characters represented in a duel. And if they aren't, it may reveal something about how relevant they are to the writers (Misawa GX, Ruka 5D's, Yuzu Arc-V...)

Go gets his re-introductory duel against Soulburner, and though I have my issues with how they handled Go in Season 2, which I went into in my previous post, it succeeds in every way a re-introductory duel should. It addresses the transition of his character between seasons, sets up his conflict for this season, introduces his new cards, adds character to Soulburner, and establishes a dynamic between the two. Their opposition is natural, and if anything, the season fails to capitalize on how well this duel set things up.

Aoi's re-introductory duel... is also against Soulburner. And their opposition... uh...

Look, I'll be frank, there is only one reason for Soulburner to duel Aoi, his third duel already in 10 episodes: they are fast-tracking him into main character slot #2. I talked about this in the Soulburner analysis.

Aoi and Soulburner have no reason to be fighting, this match-up is completely artificial. They went "well Aoi needs to get a re-introductory duel because that's the Yugioh formula, and Soulburner needs more screentime, so let's shove them together," regardless of how it doesn't make narrative sense. How do they do that?

Blue Girl: We came to find the Ignis. SOL-- I mean, my brother can help you. Soulburner: You don't understand. The Lost Incident made us suffer for a long time. SOL Technologies was partly responsible for that. Entrust our future to them? Thanks, but we'll solve our own problems. Blue Girl: *frowning* In that case, those Ignis originally belonged to SOL Technologies. Give them back. Soulburner: What?

This is completely out of character for her. She knows that they're victims of the Lost Incident, she knows what they've been through, and they've just told her they're trying to save someone whose consciousness was stolen. She just said that her motivation is saving people, specifically to pay back the people who saved her. Guess who the only person who saved you was, Aoi? It wasn't your onii-san.

It would've made more sense for Ghost Girl to duel Soulburner. She's the one who was established to be a self-serving bounty hunter in Season 1. Oh, but if you gave Ghost Girl a re-introductory duel, it might give off the wrong impression that she's relevant?

This duel doesn't even add anything to Soulburner's character either, the way that Soulburner vs. Go did.

What could they have done if they were actually thinking about Aoi?

How about Aoi vs. Akira? Akira tells her that if she can beat him in a duel, he'll believe that she's strong enough to go into the restricted zone. Or they could do Aoi vs. Ghost Girl -- same thing, Ghost Girl tells Akira that if Aoi wins, it proves she's equally capable of going on this mission.

Either of these would check all the boxes for a re-introductory duel. It's a memorable matchup, it re-establishes the personalities and (IN-CHARACTER) relationships of these three, and it addresses the transition between seasons -- we left off from Aoi's devastating loss, and this duel would bridge her into an upwards character arc in Season 2.

Of course, if they did that, they would have to make an upwards character arc for Aoi.

These two episodes have succeeded in the exact opposite of what a re-introductory episode is supposed to do. It's a garbage fire of bad writing. They regress her character, and call it progress. She's out of character, in order to be unsympathetic. They don't set up an arc for Aoi this season, because they haven't thought of one. They introduce new cards that never come back. But none of it matters anyway, because Aoi isn't actually important! We'll just make up something new the next time we're contractually obligated to give her a few episodes (but not too many, god forbid!)

I guess there's one part of her character they make consistent, which is making her lose in the worst ways possible.

⇀ Blue Girl vs. Soulburner

You know how in my last Aoi post, I said that it's good when characters lose duels, and that "X should have won that duel" is a comment that often misunderstands how outcomes are about narrative purpose rather than deck matchups?

Forget everything I said. Aoi ABSOLUTELY should have won that duel holy shit. I just witnessed a goddamn crime.

So there is actually one more reason that Soulburner duels Aoi. It's that it's a good concept for a duel. Aoi should annihilate Soulburner. Go ahead with your 72 step Salamangreat combo I dare you. Go ahead and use Burning Draw I dare you. Everyone likes seeing how the underdog comes out of a pinch, and if I came out of the duel thinking, "Wow, I can't believe Soulburner pulled that off!" I could have forgiven it.

Ha ha... wow..... I can't believe Soulburner pulled that off......

I'm not usually that bothered by hyper specific made up anime cards, but what the fuck is that trap that negates effect damage under 300. Countering exactly 1) Skull Invitation 2) Ojama Trio 3) Every one of Aoi's cards. Yeah okay, fuck you Aoi.

And Aoi still should have won, if Soulburner didn't one-up Aoi's own Fusion Summon by Burning Draw YOLO topdecking a fucking Salamangreat Super Poly out of nowhere. Why??? Because the scripter couldn't think of a way out of the situation other than copying one of the strongest cards ever designed?? Fuck you Aoi.

Even Ghost Girl knows how robbed she was.

It's salt on the wound to cap off her "I'll get stronger speech" by having her lose a duel that was 99-1 in her favor. Soulburner deletes her life points in one attack, she screams and gets slammed into a cliff, and Soulburner stands over her and says, "Blue Girl, you're stronger than before."

Jesus, just look at that condescending framing.

Aoi doesn't show up again in a relevant capacity for 20 episodes, and doesn't have another duel for 30 -- that's a quarter of Vrains. Her last words as Soulburner stands over her are "You won because of the bond between a duelist and an AI?" before she passes out.

This, I suppose, is their weak attempt at introducing a plot for Aoi this season. It's... well...

⇀ Aqua and Miyu

The Miyu backstory is lazy as hell.

I'm sorry to all the fans rooting for female characters and wlw ships, but this writing was unbelievably sloppy. Someone put "Aoi's childhood friend was a victim of the Lost Incident and that's how she gets the Water Ignis" into the show notes and then didn't think about it until it was time to write the episode.

Miyu is not a cardboard cutout. She's not cut from cardstock, both of those at least have structural integrity. Miyu has the character solidness of wet tissue. She's an NPC, a parody of a generic little girl. The only reason to care about her is if you buy into the cheap writing shortcut of damselling little girls, or you're a desperate lesbian. I'm sorry, lesbians.

They could have done anything to give Miyu an actual character, I'm not asking for a lot. Give her any kind of trait or interest -- maybe she loves the ocean and shows Aoi her collection of seashells, and she says they should go to the beach together one day but they never do. They could talk about idols, and maybe that's what inspires Aoi to later become one. They could talk about Duel Monsters, it's Yugioh for christsake. A playground duel would be adorable.

There's a million things they could have done that are more compelling than playing on the slide, but there's one that's so obvious it pains me.

The Blue Angel picture book. The one that Aoi said was her childhood treasure in the duel with Spectre, the one that motivated her to try and save him, a victim of the Lost Incident. The book that's an established part of her backstory, which made her take on the Blue Angel moniker. The book that's about a girl who is all alone until she makes friends and no longer has to cry blue tears.

Could it be more obvious? Have Miyu be the one who gave the book to Aoi. It's a backstory on a silver platter. If the writers cared about Aoi at all, if they didn't immediately forget every single thing about her the second they turn in the script for the contractually obligated Aoi episodes, they would know this. But they don't. Because even the Blue Angel picture book was clearly something they made up on the spot.

Imagine if Aoi's season 2 climax duel was vs. a controlled Miyu (à la Jin), the themes from the Spectre duel returned. Aoi questions if she really can save someone from the Lost Incident, or if it's just her own naivety, destined to be crushed over and over. But she breaks through, because this time it's her turn to save someone who's all alone. This is how you connect seasons 1 and 2, this is how you take a loss and turn it into a payoff. We can even get Spectre's perspective, he's there in the final fight.

But that's not what we get. Instead, they play on the slide, and then Miyu drops a ring down a drain, which I guess is what they think is a relatable cause of conflict for little girls. I can guarantee they would have come up with something more substantive if these were two male characters. And the pacing is just comically clunky. "Aoi-chan, look, it's my mother's ring! Isn't it pretty? Oh no, I dropped it! Wahhhhh!"

Aoi lies to Miyu's mom and says she's the one who dropped the ring, even though Miyu denies it vehemently, clearly crying and in great distress as her mother drags her away and never lets her see Aoi again.

This, we're told, is how Aoi "saved" Miyu.

Aqua: While she was imprisoned, you kept her strong, Aoi. No matter how many duels she lost, no matter how much pain she endured, even after her meals were reduced, she never broke and promised to escape. So she could see you again and apologize for that day.

.........APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT???

What the fuck kind of message is this supposed to be? Aqua is supposed to be the Ignis of TRUTH, why are she and Miyu glorifying Aoi's lie as some courageous, inspirational action, when clearly it did nothing but harm? I'm not crazy, am I? The obvious takeaway from this flashback is that even if you had good intentions lying to protect your friend, it caused miscommunication, distress, and led to their friendship breaking apart? Like, their lives would have been just fine if Aoi didn't lie, and Miyu learned a reasonable lesson about not being careless with other people's expensive objects?

This backstory is comically bad. Just imagine Miyu, going through kidnapping, starvation, and torture, sustained only by the thought that one day... she can tell the girl that she played on the slide with years ago... that she's so sorry... that her hand slipped when taking off a ring and it rolled into a drain 5 feet away.

The story would make more sense if it was me in the Lost Incident, and I was plagued by guilt over dumping Cheeto crumbs on Rachel from Pre-K, because at least I actually did something bad.

It's difficult to even articulate how much all these sloppy writing decisions compound on each other. Because they wasted Aoi's introductory episodes and didn't set up anything for her, she has no role in the story for 30 episodes. Because she was given nothing for 30 episodes, they have to shove an entire backstory for Aoi into one episode. Because they shoved the backstory into one episode, Miyu and Aoi's relationship with her are painfully rushed, generic, and flimsy. Because their relationship is so flimsy, this whole backstory, Aoi's motivation to fight, her entire season 2 plotline, is soulless garbage.

Aoi didn't remember Miyu until this episode. The writers didn't create Miyu until this episode. You cannot ask the audience to be invested in Aoi rescuing Miyu, when you don't even care enough to conceptualize her.

And this is the most damning conclusion of this post. The writers don't care about Miyu. And they don't care about Aoi. And they don't care if you care about them. You weren't meant to care about them.

Again, I'm not saying that the Vrains writers are bad writers, or they hate women. There are other factors to consider, like the specifics of gender relations in Japan, how Yugioh animes primarily exist to advertise trading cards to young boys, the fact that there has not been a single female writer on Yugioh since season 2 of GX. And obviously, Vrains had production issues, and every character suffered from flawed writing.

But my point is, Aoi suffered the most for it.

⇀ Final Thoughts

There's a lot more that I could say about Aoi for the rest of the show. Like how she gets a magical girl transformation sequence, only to be irrelevant for 10 episodes again, and we have to wait that entire time to see her new deck. Then the duel, which really needed to be a two-episoder, is about Haru instead. The pointlessness of the Bohman duel. The pointlessness of Yusaku's "identity reveal" to Aoi. How they needed to have a third and fourth Akira manpain scene as Aoi is "taken away" from him, though I guess in that last one Aoi gets to have some girlpain too.

I did plan to talk about each of these duels, and more about how I would do an Aoi vs. Miyu conflict, but this post has gotten way out of hand already, and I've made the points I wanted to make.

I hope it was cathartic for everyone who was disappointed with Aoi, and perhaps gave language to people who were frustrated but unable to articulate why. I did some research into what other people have said about Aoi's character, such as this video by YugiohEverything, but I find that a lot of discourse in Yugioh is not very good at pinpointing why something works or doesn't work, and the actual skill of writing is oversimplified. This is especially true when it comes to Yugioh girls, and criticisms tend to fall back on losing duels or getting put in a coma, and while those can suck, they aren't the real problem.

In my last Aoi post I said "I'll just have to hope that they don't fumble whatever new thing they give her... but things tend to get bleaker for female Yugioh characters as the show goes on and whatever initial involvement they had in the story fizzles out," and this, I think, has been the real problem persistently for Yugioh girls. The writers are contractually obligated to come up with something when a series is first pitched, but when that period is up, or when concessions have to be made, the female characters are the first to be forgotten.

I just didn't think it would be this bad for Aoi.

Well. Expectations lowered.

---

First Aoi analysis

All Vrains season analysis

#if you read the whole thing you a real one #yugioh vrains #vrains season analysis #aoi zaizen #ygo #pico commentary

29 notes · View notes

allwormdiet · 4 months ago

Text

Interlude 8

Man fuck this guy

So wait, can he run his timelines while he's fucking sleeping? Or can he wake up early in one timeline and stay asleep in the second one? I finally have a reason to hate this man that has nothing to do with his personality, behavior, actions, aesthetic, morality, or choice in nicknames

Fucking eww. This is by far one of the slimiest perspectives we've gotten in this story and I don't know if there's gonna be slimier.

Also you can never trust someone who can accurately be described as having "predilections," no fucking good comes of that.

I would like to see Coil die. I would like to see Coil die in ways that he would find uncomfortable or frightening. I would like to see Coil get the goddamn Diavolo treatment and be trapped in a state of permanent, ceaseless, myriad death.

I hope those moments make him sweat, and I hope his sweat feels awful inside that stupid costume

Interesting that Coil is certain Dinah can't fudge the numbers on her power. A compulsion to report accurately?

Also, Empire's split without Kaiser, not as grand as them collapsing entirely but we'll take what we can get. Easy money says Purity is the leader of one half, no idea about the other half though. Krieg maybe, it sounded like he's high in the ranks

Oh great, he's corporate too, as if Kaiser wasn't enough

Explains how he swung the bunker though, at least

Oh boy, sure there's nothing ominous looming there

Another character I'll add to the "please die screaming" list

My heart breaks for both of you (lying)

Heeeeeeeeeey Noelle. Guess we're learning about you a few arcs before shit pops off, huh

Haha, grim!

Can't wait for the day it drops to zero you putrid fuck

Honestly it kinda would have ruled if Leviathan had managed to kill Coil and Noelle and Dinah miraculously survived, but we're not in that timeline, now are we

This poor fucking girl. I can't imagine the kinds of issues she'll be grappling with for the rest of her life.

As if he wasn't rancid enough

Cauldron vial, then. Which means he didn't even have a trigger event to explain why he's a sadistic control freak, he's just like that

Speaking of being a sadistic control freak

So the only reason he doesn't viciously torture or murder the Undersiders, Travelers, or Dinah in his alt timelines as stress relief is on the off chance he breaks one of his toys in a way he can't recover from. Which means he'll just use that opportunity to break less useful toys.

Current Thoughts

I want Coil to die so fucking bad it's not even funny

#parahumans #wormblr #worm liveblogging #liveblog #worm extermination

21 notes · View notes

robinismywifee · 2 years ago

Text

straight girl || e. williams

pairings ellie williams x fem!oc/reader

summary maria sends a straight girl with a boyfriend and ellie williams, a gay girl with a girlfriend, to go on a trip together but an unexpected storm traps them in a cabin. takes place in jackson, one bed trope? 19 y/o ellie, no spoilers, 3rd person pov, ellie has a crush on oc

warnings NSFW, fingering (r. receiving), scissoring?, pet names (babe, good girl), cheating, slight masturbation??

a/n be aware that aime is an oc and dont feel insecure or anything if she looks nothing like you, youre literally beautiful trust me, also you can always find my oneshots on my wattpad, also feel free to request stories 💕

wordcount 5.8k

ellie has always felt different towards aime. ever since she was 14, right when she first layed her eyes on her, she never took them off.

how she always walked around with a hudge smile on her face, her smile was so perfect, and her uneven white teeth only made it more perfect

when they first met, she had a soft pitch voice, and had soft features, making her face look so innocent and adorable, but as the years went on, her voice got deeper and more raspy, making her more captivating and euphonic, she still had softer features, but they almost shifted in a way to make her more elegant

along with her face and voice changing over the years, ellie noticed her body changed too, she grew more curves, her stomach always layed flat but her breasts were full, and from what you could see when she wore her laced tanktops she loved, they sat perfectly too..

something about her and her sandy blonde hair was just so alluring to ellie.

ellie wouldnt say she had a crush on her, the only time they would talk was during patrol, exchanging simple words and short sentences, or if they walked by, aime would make sure to smile at her and wave, but they never failed to make ellies mind freak out—

am i talking too much? is my hair okay? shit she looks so fucking hot. how do i make her laugh without making it seem like im trying too hard? what? did she just complement me? holy shit i think im gonna pass out. how can someone look so goddamn hot while doing literally anything?

—are typical things ellies mind would be yelling.

aime was well known around jackson, well known for being pretty, nice, happy, and hardworking

her looks never failed to amaze people, practically all the teenagers of jackson has asked her out, and she was really nice, if she knew your name and if you werent rude to her or other people (who dont deserve it), she would make sure to smile at you walking by, which is why anytime she saw ellie, she would give a warm smile, she also liked complimenting people, seeing there faces brighten up from a simple comment made her face brighten up, and all her compliments were always genuine, she would never lie and say she liked a shirt on someone if she didnt, which is also why she would compliment ellie, ellie was easy to compliment, she was so beautiful and nobody talked about her enough- plus ellies reaction everytime made aimes face yank a big smile, ellie would always get blushed cheeks and flustered

aime only ever did hard and dangerous work, she did patrols a lot, keeping the bad away from her people, and she was talented on trips, if for any reason she got kicked out of jackson, she would survive. she had great agility, knowledge, it wasnt her thing but she knew how to track and hunt, she scavenged better then others, she wasnt the strongest, but she definitely knew how to win a fight, usuing her smaller size to her advantage. she was smart, and she was genuinely a happy person.

"i know aime is like, really good with trips, ive gone on them with her before, but just the two of us? i mean seriously?" ellie complained to dina, "i don't get why your angry, shes a nice girl and shes a good person to go on a trip with" dina shurgged, dina and aime were actually good friends, not close per say, but they hung out when they could, if aime didnt constantly drown herself in work she would have more time for friends and dina, but for the past two months it was either work or daniel

ellie stayed silence at dinas remark, so dina continued, "you know.. before her and daniel started dating, you liked her, always coming home from those patrols ranting to me about how she complimented you and was super hot as she killed an infected, but now that shes dating him you hate her? why?"

this caused ellie to stop packing her bag and look up to dina, "dina, her dating some random guy i dont know has nothing to do with this! i just dont want to go on a whole ass trip alone with her, its gonna be awkward!" ellie defended, but they both knew that wasnt why ellie was so mad, "the trip youve known about for 2 days? really? thats weird, considering you've been mad and annoyed at her for the past 2 months"

"its just- you and her use to go on those 'friend dates' or whatever you weirdos call it, like every month, and now that she has a boyfriend she cant make room for you? or any other of her friends? like, if you walk by her, shes with her stupid boyfriend, holding hands and giggling like, what can he say to make you laugh like that? probably some stupid joke that isnt even funny, i dont even get why she likes him, hes ugly with his ugly hair and he's completely useless, he does nothing and he probably isnt even dating her for her!" ellie ranted, throwing things into her bag for the trip

dina laughed.

ellies head shot up to her, "what? why are you laughing? you asked!" ellie said frustrated, "you're totally jealous, arent you?" dina smirked, "what? jealous? dina shut up! you know im dating cat!" ellie said, growing more and more frustrated by the minute

"okay yeah, but you have liked aime for wayyyy longer then cat" dina remarked, "i dont like aime! i just think shes hot, and literally everyone else with eyes thinks that so shut it" ellie groaned, zipping her bag and running out of her door, dina laughed some more, "wait up!" she said through her laughs

the sound of the horses feet clacking on the ground filled the empty forest.

"so howd you sleep?" aime asked, trying to spark a conversation. they had just left, and it was awkward between the two. ellie had been avoiding aime- for the past 2 months- changing patrol partners and running behind corners when she saw her to prevent that spark she felt in her stomach when she smiled at her

"fine" ellie mumbled, "oh, well, better then bad" aime remarked, "mhm" ellie hummed dryly, they rode their horses side by side in silence for a little, "i havent spoken to you in awhile, how's your life been?" aime asked, looking over to the girl, "the same" ellie said, looking down at the horses mane, aime looked away from ellie, down to her horses mane, trying to think of ways to get her ranting like how she use to to her

"can you tell me more about astronomy?" aime asked, thinking back to how she told her about it a few months ago, "uh.. why?" ellie said blankly, "sorry.. just thought you liked that stuff, and its fun to talk about stuff you like, you know?" aime explained, cheeks red embarrassed

aime was confused of why ellie was acting so different from usual, usually ellie would be cracking jokes and puns, telling funny stories, ranting about things she liked.. and ellie did seem to disappear for awhile, did she do something wrong? i mean, ellie wasnt even looking at her, it wasnt weird for ellie to avoid eye contact, she actually did that alot, but she wouldnt even glance in her direction.

while aime was trying to figure it out, ellies mind kept on repeating over and over and over again, aime and daniel stupid kissing and 'i love yous' right before they left.

"hey ellie" aime said, first time speaking in at least 2 hours, "hm?" ellie hummed, "did i do something wrong? because im really sorry if i did, but could you tell what it is that i did? i would never do anything wrong to hurt you on purpose, ever, in my whole life, and i sorta just spent however long we've been out trying to figure it out and i cant" aime ranted, which was sorta out of charater for aime, and aime apologizing for something that isnt her fault made ellie finally look over at her with sad eyes

it wasnt aimes fault that she felt like this, it was her own fault for letting something so small get to her, and she just wasted hours of aimes time for her to try and figure it out. thats what ellie though, and it made her feel like shit.

aime was suprised ellie was looking at her, and confused of ellies emotion displayed on her face- it looked like guilt.

"you didn't do anything aime, dont be sorry, im just tired" ellie said to her, hoping aime would believe she was just tired, but aime didnt believe that it was that, somethings going on

"hey, theres the cabin tommy was talking about, like a few miles up ahead, should we take a rest and eat there?" aime asked ellie, looking down at the map unfolded out infront of her while still riding the horse

"yeah, its getting dark" ellie agreed with her, looking up at the clouded sky, it was pretty sunny yesterday, this morning it was partly cloudy, and now all you could see were clouds, aime didnt think too much about it since last she checked they were bright white ones, but as she watched ellie looking up at the sky she did too, now noticing the clouds turning grey

"you think it will start raining before we get there?" aime asked, folding the map away and sliding it in her pocket, "i dunno.. im more worried about how long its gonna last, if you look more east the clouds are really dark, it might be a bad storm and we would have to wait it out" ellie explained her thoughts

"true.. but atleast we're gonna have shelter, could you imagine how bad it would be if we weren't by the cabin?" aime smiled, trying to brighten ellies mood, "yea, that would suck" ellie scoffed, aime, smiled a little bit more, happy that ellie gave more emotion instead of blankly humming as a response

"so the cabins just east?" ellie asked, looking over at aime for an answer, aime still smiling, now smiling because ellie was actually looking at her, maybe she was just tired.

"yeah, no sharp turns or anything i dont think, as long as we keep going straight it'll come into view" aime nodded, "perfect.. straight towards the storm" ellie mumbled, "it probably wont be that bad, ellie" aime tried to reason, but ellie was caught off guard by aime using her name

"y- yeah.." she stuttered

ellie and aime pushed the bookshelf infront of the front door of the cabin, their clothes dripping wet, the thunderstorm whistling and lighting jumping, the sound of rain dropplets slamming against the windows

"shit" ellie panted, "its way worse then i thought it'd be" she said, catching her breath, "yea.. its pretty bad" aime agreed, also out of breath, the rain had started about half a mile before they got to the cabin, and when it was in view it started pouring, then it get even worse with hard rain and loud thunder, they had to run and tie up their horsed in a shed, and run into the cabin as fast as they could to prevent getting even more wet, but here they stood, soaked

ellie looked at amie confused, "what? do i look bad with wet hair?" aime asked, pushing the hair that stuck to her face behind her ears, suddenly feeling insecure under ellies gaze

"bad? no you can never look bad, i just didnt exepct you to agree on me with that instead of trying to convince me happy things" ellie explained to the girl, aime smiled at ellies compliment, which ellie didnt even realize she gave

ellie turned her head to look around the cabin, she immediately spotted a mirror, she walked over to it, taking out her tangled bun, pushing her hair behind her ears and started messing with her bangs

aime watched her doing it, if i was a guy id have the biggest crush on her, aime though, walking over to her, standing shoulder to shoulder, ellie stopped fiddling with her hair and started fiddling with her hands looking down

"you're really pretty ellie, cats lucky to date you" aime smiled looking to her, ellies head stayed down, but aime noticed a blush creep onto ellies face

ellie felt like she could collapse at her calling her pretty and using her name, but the though of cat made guilt consume her. how can she date someone but think about anyother person way more? or how can she get crazy butterflies in her stomach when some random girl calls her pretty but doesnt really feel anything when her own girlfriend does?

ellie did like cat, she did, but ellie was starting to think she didnt really like her. she was fun to be around and she made her smile, she also liked how cat didnt care what others thought of their relationship, but everytime her and cat would go by aime, ellie would always pull away from cat, untangling her hands from her, putting them in her pocket or pretending to scrach her arm until aime was out of view.

"did you bring any extra clothes?" aimes voice snapped ellies thoughts away, "uh.." ellie looked up at her, "i dont think i have any pants since they would fit in my bag but everything else yea" ellie thought, "i think i only have a tanktop and boxer breifs" aime mumbled, taking her bag off her shoulders and turning around-

she was too focused on watching ellie she didnt even have time to look around, and ellie was too focused on making herself look presentable to look around

ellie turned around too, the cabin was really small, they already knew that from the outside but it seemed smaller on the inside

there was one big bed, queen size maybe, a small kitchen and a two person dinner table, a big carpet, and a fireplace, there was also a door by the kicthen, probably the bathroom

okay, good, theres a comfy bed for us, aime thought, before walking over to the kicthen, setting her bag on the counter before opening ir and pulling out her clothes. she didnt mind sharing a bed at all, she shared beds with whe friends all the time, even with twin sized ones, it wasnt weird

ellie stood there with widened eyes, the thought of sharing a bed with her made her feel warm, but she shook her head and walked by aime, setting her bag down next to her and looking for her clothes

while ellie was trying to find her socks, she saw in the corner of her eye, aime slipping off her jacket, which was whatever, but then she pulled off her shirt and reached for the buttons of her pants, ellies face went red, she tried to focuse herself on finding the socks in her bag, but her peripheral vision wasn't allowing it, so she mindlessly shuffled through her bag making it seem like she didnt notice

but aime knew ellie noticed her changing, aime watched her face go pink as she slipped off her pants, she smiled to herself, shes so cute, if i was a guy i'd have the biggest crush on her, aime thought to herself

"you finding your clothes okay?" aime teased, ellie felt her face get even hotter, shit shes so hot- "u- uh, yea, just fine" ellie stuttered, moving her back so aime wasnt in her peripheral vision anymore so she could actually focus on finding them

aime got completely nude, as the rain had soaked through her clothes and her underwear and bra were soaked, slipping on white boxer breifs and a white V cut tanktop, her bag was really full and these were the only clothes she could fit as they were thin and tiny

aime walked over to the fireplace, sitting infront of it. once ellie had her clothes layed out, on the counter, she peeked her head thinking aime was still behind her, but she wasnt, so ellie looked over her other shoulder to see her on her knees trying to started a fire, ellie watched as her damp hair dripped down her back, going through her thin white too and down to her shorts, ellie couldnt help but stare at her ass.

aime felt eyes on her, she peeked her head over her shoulder to see ellie immediately moving her head away from her, aime smilied to herseld before going back to the fire

ellie turned her back to face aime, before getting undressed, placing her heavy wet clothes next to aimes, as ellie got changed, she stared at aimes light pink laced bra that layed on the counter, she started to get butterflies as she pictured what aime would look like in it, she shook her head feeling grossed out by herself and turned around now clothed

aime heard ellie walk over to the now lit fire, she moved her head to look up at ellie, aime didnt know it but her face went a shade of pink seeing ellie in a thick strapped white tanktop, it was tight but long, covering half her underwear- her underwear being greyish purple and sort of boxer breifs like aimes exepct hers were a lot shorter.

as ellie sat down next to aime, aime pulled out two cans of chef boyardiee ravioli, she passed ellie a can along with plastic forks, the only noises being heard was the fire crackling and the heavy rain- followed by thunder almost every minute

"so how are you and cat?" aime asked, eating the now warmed ravioli, ellie stayed quiet for a minute, "we're good" ellie shortly replied, aime nodded, "i really like the tattoo she gave you, you look super good with it" aime smiled, making eye contact with her

ellie got red from that (again) "so.. uhm.. how are you and daniel" ellie asked, trying to return the question, but her voice came out bitter, aime didnt realize ellies tone, now stuck in thought if her boyfriend she didnt like, aime shrugged, "i dont know"

ellies eyebrows scrunched, "what do you mean you dont know?" she asked her, watching aime as she stared into the fire, trying to stop her eyes from going down to her cleavage, "uh, its nothing, i do like him but hes just very needy and- touchy" aime tried to explain without outting herself for not liking him at all

"how so?" ellie asked, now invested, she thought they had the perfect relationship, "he basically moved in with me without asking, he complains that i work too much, and like.. he always tries to get me to do it with him, but i don't want to yet" aime said, she whished she wanted to, but everytime he would touch her she just would squirm away and would feel gross

ellie was dumbfounded, "wait? you guys havent done it yet?" she really thought they did it like every night, aime shook her head, "have you and cat?" aime asked, placing the empty can to the side, "maybe" ellie simply replied, aime nodded, "i figured" she said, taking a sip of water

"whats that supposed to mean?" ellie asked, "like every couple of jackson does it im the only one" she shrugged, ellie sipped water, "well, you and kaleb definitely did it" ellie almost mumbled, "what? no we didnt?" aime asked confused, kaleb was her ex boyfriend, they were together for about a year and half, before she found out kaleb had been cheating on her for almost a year.

"uh, you guys were together for over a year" ellie said, confused, "yea, i know, thats why he started doing it with other girls behind my back" aime replied, "he what?" ellie raised her voicd, growing angry at him, even though it was years ago when they broke up, the reason the broke up kaleb and amie told people they both just lost feelings

"oh shit- i didnt mean to say that, ellie please dont tell anyone, please-"

"i wont, but what the fuck?" ellie questioned, "next time i see him hes gonna kiss my fist" ellie said angry, "ellie! its not a big deal and it was years ago, who cares?" aime asked confused of why ellie randomly got mad

"who cares? you dont date someone and go fuck other people because they werent ready for it!"

"no, trust me ellie, its fine, i didnt even really care when i found out, i didnt really like him" aime shrugged, "huh? whyd you date him?" ellie asked, "i- im done talking about this" aime said, unsure of how to reply

they were silent for a few minutes, just staring into the fire- well aime was, and she thought ellie was too, but ellie was staring at her

ellies eyes trailed from aimes eyes, to her nose, to her soft plumpled lips, to her slightly wet neck, almost dry from the rain, to her full chest, to her damp white shirt, her shirt was damp enough that you could see her shape and her nipples from her not wearing a bra, ellies eyes trailed even ferther to aimes bottoms, flickering back to her breasts. her mouth began to water, she thought about what her lips would taste like, what her skin would taste like, how perfectcly her hands would cup her breasts, how her pussy would taste- ellie tried to stop her thoughts but shes been holding them back for too long now, and they kept pouring into her head, ellie wondered what her face would look like, what noises would come out, she thought about her screaming her named-

ellie felt herself grow wet, she couldnt stop it, "im gonna go to the bathroom" ellie mumbled, standing up and walking to the door in the kitchen, she entered the bathroom, it was small, just a toilet, a sink, and a standing shower

ellie locked the door and sat on the toilet cover, she felt butterflies in her stomach, thinking of how aime would look riding her, how her wavy hair would drape over her naked body, ellie pressed her theighs together, "shit" she whispered, allowing her hand to go to her underwear.

"hey" aime smiled, ellie was bright red, i cant believe i just fucking did that, ellie thought to herself, slapping herself in her mind for doing that to not only cat but to aime

"hi" ellie said, standing up looking down at aime who still sat on the ground, "we should probably get to bed?" aime questioned, ellie looked back at the bed, shit i forgot theres only one bed, "uh- yea, probably" ellie nodded, "you okay?" aime asked, "yeah why?" ellie quickly said back, "you just seem, flustered? i don't really know"

aime put out the fire, the moonlight lighting the cabin, and held out her hand for ellie to help pull her up, which ellie did, once aime was up, she didnt let go of ellies hand, she smiled looking up at her, "can i ask a personal question?" aime randomly asked, still holding ellies hand, "uh, sure?" ellie said confused, "how many people have you.. done it with?" aime asked, hoping it wasn't too weird, but they were both 19 so aime wanted to compare their numbers.

"only cat" ellie answered, aime nodded, looked down to her feet, "how many have you?" ellie asked, "uh.." aime hummed, "im not like- gonna judge you or anything" ellie tried to comfort her, which it worked, "none" aime mumbled, "none?" ellie asked, making sure she heard it right, aime nodded, "oh" ellie said, which caused aime to look up at her, "i didnt mean that to sound like i was judging or- something- i meant oh as in just like that i was suprised" ellie corrected

aime laughed, "its okay, you can judge, ive had three boyfriends, im 19, and still a virgin"

"three?" ellie asked confused, she only knew of two, "oh, yeah, it was before you came to jackson" she shortly explained, "who? do i know them?" ellie asked, "uh.. lucas, but it was only like for 4 months and we were 13 so it doesnt actually really count" aime explained, which caused ellie to laugh

"well why havent you?" ellie questioned, "just dont want to, anytime the touch me i feel gross" aime shrugged like it was normal, "uh.. okay?" ellie said confused, "and if im being honest.. dicks are disgusting" aime whispered, which caused ellie to laugh again, "what? first of all, ive never heard a straight girl say that, second of all, did you just swear?!"

aime laughed, "oh shut up! everybody thinks theyre gross they just dont say it!" aime dragged ellie behind her as she made her way to the bed, ellie giggled as she crawled into the bed with her

"i should of brought a blanket" aime mumbled, the bed only has a sheet and two pillows, the blanket was nowhere to be seen

"yeah? how would you have brought that" ellie questioned, "uhh.. i would of figured it out!" aime said with a smile, they were both of their sides facing eachother, "yeah right" ellie laughed

ellie kept on flickering her eyes to how pretty her body looked, she needed to stop she moved and layed on her back

it was silent for awhile, ellie thought aime went to sleep and aime didnt know if ellie was awake or not, "ellie?" aime whispered, the rain still pouring, ellie turned her head and looked at aime, suprised she was awake, "yeah?" ellie asked, "im cold" aime said, her hands on her arms trying to warm herself up, ellie looked down at her and noticed her nipples poking through from being cold- "uh.. me too" ellie said, unsure of how to respond to that

"can we.. you know.." aime tried to say without saying it, "huh?" ellie asked clueless, "uh, i dont mean to sound weird or anything, i only mean it platonically but.." aime said nervously, ellie finally realized what she was getting at

ellie opened her arms up motioning for her to go there, aime smiled at the girl, and scooted till she was presseda against ellies said, she then rested her cheek against ellies chest, wrapped an arm around her waist, ellie closed her arms around her, hugging her gently

they layed in silence for a few minutes, aime warmed up a bit but her legs were cold, so she lifted her knee and placed it between ellies legs, ellie almost instinctively brought her hand to aimes leg, just above her knee, and pulled it up more so that her knee was only a few inches away from her heat, aime moved her hips to try and get closer to ellie, but since they were already touching ellie, and since aime's hips were in between ellies theigh, it only made aime's core brush against it, unexpected butterflies swormed aime but not in her stomach, and it felt good.

she sat in silence, her mind repeating how she felt when she moved her hips from a few minutes ago, she opened her eyes and looked up at ellie, but ellies eyes were closed and seemingly asleep. so aime pressed herself to ellie theigh, and moved her hips up, she let out a shakey breath, suddenly turned fully on- this is the first time she was every turned on with someone else in the room.

aime's eyes looked to ellies body, before she sunk her hips back down slowly, causing her to let out another breath as her clit rubbed against ellies skin, slightly gripping onto ellies fabric

she stopped herself, what the fuck am i doing? im straight, i have a boyfriend, and ellie had a girlfriend. what the fuck is wrong with me? i guess since daniels always in the house i never have time to touch myself so now that hes gone i wanna? she tried to reason

"whyd you stop?" ellies voice achoed the room as aime froze- "hm?" aime hummed, "you know what i said" ellie smirked looking down at the girl, but the girl had her eyes closed hoping she was dreaming completely embarassed, "stop what?" aime asked trying to sound confused, "don't play dumb" ellie said, moving her hand from aimes leg to her chin, she pulled her chin to look at her, aime looked anywhere but her eyes

"look at me" ellie ordered, aime scooted herself up more, hovering over ellie face to finally look at her in the eyes, they didnt speak anything, the sexual tension was so thick you could cut it with scissors

aime couldnt help herself, she was so turned on by ellie, her body, her face, and her voice, she without any thoughts slammed her lips into ellies, ellie immediately kissed back, putting all the anger she had for herself and for daniel into the kiss, ellie had her hands onto ellies waist, and aime just did what felt right, aime had one leg outside of ellies, the other in between ellies two, her hands holding ellies face

ellie leaned herself up, moving her hands more towards aimes hips, pushing them to help her move agianst them like how she was doing eairler, aime let out a moan through the kiss, which made ellie melt

aime started grinding her hips more to ellies theigh, "do you want me?" ellie grunted, aime only hummed in response, "i need words" ellie said, making lovebites on her jaw, "mh- i- i want you ellie" she moaned, she never felt this good in her life, she felt like she was in heaven, "good girl" ellie whispered

ellie gripped aimes hips, causing them to stop, she brought her lips back to aimes lips, kissing her with tongue, aime tried to move her hips but ellie was stronger then her and she couldnt

aime brought her hand to herself, trying to rub herself but ellie pulled away and gripped her wrist, "did i say you could?"

"n- no" aime whined, ellie licked her lips before she brought her face to aimes cleavge, she kissed it a few times before she pulled away, pulling aimes shirt over her head, ellie felt herself grow even wetter at the sigh, she stared in awe for a moment, before she started to taste her skin and message her boobs

"ellie- please" aime moaned wanting more, as much ellie wanted to tease aime more, she was teasing herself, ellie pulled away, looking at the marks she just created,

ellie grabbed aimes hips and lifted her up, before pulling her leg up too, and pushing her to sit back down on her so now she was straddling her instead of being in between her legs

ellie then brought her middle and ring finger to her clothed slit, rubbing her slowly, watching as she squirmed, she could feel her wetness seeping through the fabric, "youre so wet" ellie grunted, she moved her hand and pulled the waistband of aimes boxers, she sunk her hand into them, letting her wet lips come in contact with the pads of her fingers, "is this all for me babe?" ellie moaned, "only you" aime moaned

ellie began to drag her two fingers up and down her slit, as they slopply kissed, "i need you in me ellie" aime moaned, those words alone made ellie moan, so she sunk her fingers deep inside of her, aime bit her lip muffling her moan, "let me hear you" ellie moaned, jamming her fingers even deeper then before, aime let her jaw hang as she moaned, and began to grind her hips onto ellies fingers, "you look so pretty on me" ellie whispered as she began to pick up her paste

"tell me how good it feels" ellie moaned, starting to curl her fingers, "mmpfh- it- it feels so good ellie!" aime whinned, "good girl" ellie whimpered, "i- im gonna" aime tried to make out a sentance, but she cut herself off with whine, her stomach tightened, she arched her back onto ellies fingers, but ellie kept on pumping, overstimulating her as she dripped onto her fingers

"you did such a good job" ellie complimented, pulling her fingers out, aime didnt know what was to happen next, but ellie shoved her two fingers into aimes mouth, watching as aime complied, sucking on her fingers and twirling her tongue around them

"good girl" ellie whispered, she pulled her fingers out of her mouth, ellie pulled aime and turned her around so now aime was on bottom, ellie pulled off her underwear and pulled off aimes

she pressed her lips to hers, making out with eachother there tongues tangling. ellie then moved so that her left leg was under aimes, and that her right leg was over her others, pressing their clits together, aime let out a whine as ellie started to grind, there slits grinding against eachother

as aime gripped onto ellies leg, she leaned her head back and let out a whine, "fuck- ellie" she moaned, moving her hips grinding along with her, "daniel could never make you feel like this, huh?" ellie groaned, "no, only you can ellie" aime moaned, bringing her hand to ellies tanktop, lifting it up she could see her body

"thats it- good girl" ellie moaned, aime felt as if her ears had been blessed with the sound of her moaning, she wanted to get more of her noises out, aime brought her hand to her boobs, squeezing them and messaging them, "ugh- fuck- you're so hot" she moaned, leaning her head back grinding harder, "im gonna cum ellie" aime was able to pant

ellie felt her stomach tighten at her words, she rolled her hips once more before her and aimes moans were combained, ellie leaned onto aime with their chests pressed together, ellies head in the crook of her neck, both panting together.

#ellie williams smut #ellie williams #ellie williams x reader smut #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams tlou #ellie williams tlou2 #tlou fanfiction #the last of us #the last of us fanfic #ellie williams x oc #ellie williams x you #the last of us 2 #the last of us smut

316 notes · View notes

alwaysshallow · 1 year ago

Text

— coffee at midnight, part 3

John "Soap" MacTavish x f!reader

Sometimes things are just too rough. He's here to make everything easier. (3,9 k)

1 | 2

AO3 version

Having something stable in your life was rare – you learned that at very young age, when you were tossed from one family to another. Trying so desperately to find a right home, to fit somewhere because after five foster families, you had your hope low.

Well, at least that was until a sweet couple of two women started to be interested in adopting you. First, you were hesitant. Like, no one could blame you, right? The amount of families that you've talked with and nothing came out of it, it was pretty sad for a child to be fooled like that. Yet, when everything was finalized, and Kate presented you the room with full pride, walls painted on your favorite color (she asked!) you cried.

Genuinely cried because you never thought you'd find a family like that. Two moms, who loved every version of you, wanted the best for you. Adopted by the best people in the world, eleven year old, you were on the cloud nine.

You finally had your people.

That "stable" thing also applied to relationships of every sort – friendships, boyfriends you had. Hell, boyfriend-girlfriends type of status scared the shit out of you, considering how many times you ended up crying over something, someone. If you would think about it, nothing really survived through time – maybe that's why you build a wall between you and everyone. Except your moms.

And, except Addison. She was your dearest best friend from high school days and you could trust her with everything at this point. The amount of times she was by your side in your darkest moments or saddest, like when Jake dumped you for some blond chick from cheerleader squad. You remembered vividly how she encouraged you to throw eggs at his car.

The two of you were the equivalent of all these memes about best friends. Dumb ones; the ones where you knew so many shit about each other, so if your friendship somehow would end, you'd have to kill the other person. What was more funny, it was literally like that, even if you were in military and automatically had less time.

When you were on leave? Hell, you reserved at least two days straight just for her, to tell all the tea (the tea wasn't classified at least) or to listen to it. You loved her too much.

Those walls were up until Task Force 141 came in – and specifically that one goddamn person, but you didn't need to bring him up in your mind to know that. Even if it was military thingy, you were like a found family, which was ironic, considering you thought it's gonna be 'job only' relationships.

Yet, that found family bond was so strong that when you were on leave, it was impossible not to contact each other. Not only groupchats were alive (on every platform possible), but also you met with them if there was a slight chance for that. Most of you were going home, and almost everyone before taking that "vacation" wanted to meet again. In normal circumstances, without that big "we're military" thing, so you had a few bars to swing in.

Where no one knew who the hell the six of you were, where you played pool with strangers, being experienced after late night sessions in military. Or, darts, where you once lost and almost scratched guy's eyes out when he bragged about it, and you were completely done since you loved darts.

Well, that was where boys came to conclusion that they won't even try to participate in Monopoly with you, or Ludo. Just because you were "violent" or something like this; you didn't pay attention to that because you had a plan to convince them anyway. They would always fold, especially when some money was on the table to win.

All in all, you loved them, honestly. Their humor, even if you rolled your eyes multiple times, being the only woman, except the moments when Farah or Kate helped you in field. Hell, they were irritating on purpose, only to get a reaction out of you, especially with jokes about women. But, they slowly learned that they could have other things to joke about.

Yet, they were still respectful, even if they were men.

You also loved the way you could count of them. Every situation, every little bump on the road, they were here. Maybe it was shared experience, but you knew it was not only that – empathy counted in this one too, as well as care.

Because here, everyone cared. Even on leave, maybe especially then since inner demons never slept. It wasn't something you all talked about openly, but one glance at someone could be enough to tell if someone was bothered.

Either by the past, the present, or the future. Soldiers had way too many things on their minds on all times, buried deep, so it wouldn't be a problem on the field, when they needed to focus. There were more important things, like killing the enemy, getting intel, protecting the civilians. No time for being emotional, no?

Everyone knew that eventually, it will spill all over.

And when it would, it was sure as hell it's not gonna be pretty.

Probably your moment came right after getting back to base. One day, Price told you – one day to "reset", and the next day, 2 P.M. sharp, all of the team was needed to be back in the field. You wish he wouldn't say that; you needed anything but to rest. Not after a bad day. Not after failing one part of the mission. Not after your uniform was covered in so much dirt and blood you couldn't even see your face properly or hands.

You looked nothing like your previous version, not to mention the mimics and the blank stare in the mirror. Trying to ignore it? Impossible, especially when your hands shook, as you tried to take off your clothes and wash yourself in shared bathrooms. You knew that no one will bother you at almost midnight, they were probably asleep, or playing poker.

With a sigh, you adjusted the water to your liking; it was warm, but not too warm, just perfect for a quick shower. Or, you thought it was gonna be a quick one – you needed a one scrub of your body, and one look at blood coming down the drain, to sit on the floor of the cabine. Unable to make another move, because for the first time in the while, you couldn't even wash properly.

"For fuck's sake" you cursed under your breath, mad at yourself; you were a soldier. You should be able to get yourself clean, to not make a big of the deal of something that happened many times your career.

You saw those situations multiple times, and right back then, under the shower, you were like a broken piece. Broken piece, who suddenly had all of images right in front of her eyes. Images of blood, dirt, broken bones, dead bodies. Voices in your head, people screaming, trying to get you to help them, but you couldn't do shit without orders.

With a loud sigh, you bent your legs, pulling them closer to you, your forehead pressed to knees. Involuntary tears streamed down your face. It was hard not to cry every once in a while to wind off, to let all out of the emotions go away, before they will buckle up once again. Hard was scrubbing your body, while you thought the worst of yourself, but you had to brush everything off. No matter how long it would take, it was necessary.

It was aggravating how badly you wanted to close your eyes, but couldn't since too many images were playing in your head. That's why you were staring blankly at your dirty skin, trying to actually pull yourself together, to make yourself stand again, to scrub your body reminding you of everything. For the first time in a while, you felt like you're losing yourself again, like you don't know what to do, genuinely.

Am I too much? Am I a monster? Of course I am a monster. With a blood at my hands – you thought, clearing your throat, when it started burning. You felt like in any moment, you would burst out crying.

You punched the white tiles right in front of you out of frustration; it was supposed to help in a way, but it didn't, considering that your knuckles came out scratched. And, what's more to it, a little bloody.

That was also the moment when you realized Soap was looking at you, in shock – before, you didn't even notice his presence in community showers. He looked like he wanted to say something, but out of respect, he looked away for a moment, coughing awkwardly.

You couldn't care less at that moment in which state he sees you in.

"I just walked in. I'm... 'm not some kind of creep" he started, stumbling on his own words. He wasn't the best with them in moments like these, you knew that, but appreciated still. "Couldn't find ya, no one knew, and... I was lookin'..."

"I get it, okay" you sighed, clearing your throat.

Maybe you should care that he saw you practically naked – practically because curled like this, he couldn't see your intimate parts or anything, but you didn't. You just were... staring in the wall, again.

"What do you want? Something happened?" you finally looked at him, and he raised his eyebrow, confused that you're even saying something like this, implying that he wants something from you.

"What? No, everything's alright, I just... 'st saw your face when you got out of the jeep. And, there's something wrong with ya, lass, every time you don't say goodnight."

You raised an eyebrow too.

"Fuck. You know what I mean, hen. Don't act clueless."

Of course you knew.

"Yeah, I just..." you bit your cheek from inside.

It was a hard call for you – to share what was on your mind or not. Right, as best friends to the grave (that's what Soap called your relationship multiple times), in theory it was a must. In theory only though, because practice was... a little different.

A lot to take, that's for sure, and everyone had their own problems to deal with – you knew it too well – and as his best friend, you knew his shit that he had to live through. He had enough of his bullshit, to hear about yours, but it was clear that Soap MacTavish wasn't the one who gives up easily.

If anything, he could get more curious about the problem and be more nagging, trying to help because "that's what he does best". It wouldn't probably even be another talk, but small gestures, and as much as you loved these types of things, you wanted to forget what bothered you. So, the easiest way was just to tell him.

"I see their faces. Everyone. Everyone from today, but also from the past. That pregnant lady that I killed right before I met you" you eventually said; quietly, like it was something ignominious to even think of.

It was something ironic to think, considering that you always cared about mental health and told everyone around you how feelings matter, how they are validated to feel everything. Kate taught you that, making a strong point about it when you usually were very closed about telling her your difficulties. She wanted to make you feel heard if you'd be willing to share anything, even something so little, even if you thought it was stupid.

Yet, you still felt bad.

"Terrorist." he corrected you, keeping the low tone. It seemed like the most important thing to him – to correct you that was a terrorist first, pregnant lady second. "It was you or her."

"It's not important, Johnny. My point is, we fucked up. I fucked up, pretty badly. Not only blew our plan, but someone had to pay the price. And I fucking can't even look at myself!" you laughed, feeling bitter and even weaker than before.

It was a tragedy that he had to see you like this.

"I can't even fucking wash myself because I see all of this blood, shallow wounds, and I just..." you shook your head, trying not to break more.

Especially right in front of him, when he was looking at you with... pity?

When you covered eyes with your hand, trying to separate yourself from that feeling, you could hear his footsteps coming closer. Next thing he did was dropping to his knees, at least that what it sounded like, considering that your view wasn't on him.

"I have nightmares lately. Bad ones. And from that dehydration today, from having to see the executions for getting fucking intel... it's just becomes worse. And worse. And worse."

"It's your job. You're good at it. Your job." his voice is steady and quiet, such a contrast to yours; breaking, shaky.

"I'm fucking disgusting, that's what I am." it came out snarky, sudden. You know he doesn't deserve that; he meant the best for you, he always did. Putting you before him, which irritated the shit out of you.

Many times you thought he deserved a better friend.

"I'm supposed to kill bad guys and protect good ones, not to let kill good guys for an intel. It's another fuck up mission, it's getting to my head. If we're doing any good."

"We are doing good. I... I think."

Hearing those words was something like a breaking point for you; you looked at Soap kneeling beside you, the corner of lips twitching before you broke into uncontrollable laughter. It quickly became maniac, something that you had no control over, just to transform into involuntary crying because it was enough. He thought team was doing good?

Thought wasn't enough. You needed a proof, something visible, something on paper that not even everything, but most of your work is needed and does good. Words weren't enough, and his hesitance was just a nail to a coffin you already were in because you chose this work for a reason. Helping people, make them feel safe.

As you looked at Soap, his presence was just melting the walls you had – as always, next to him, you were unable to lie or pretend like with everyone else. You felt you could just throw everything out of your system without wondering if it's appropriate. And you were crying, and laughing, and just making yourself crazy in front of him, yet he wasn't saying anything about it.

You didn't know what was happening in this moment as you were shaking; you just registered that his hands are slowly coming to you, and before he could hug you or anything, you decided to push him away a bit.

"I'm a fucking mess, Johnny." you babbled, trying to get your voice steady again. "Go, I have to... shower. It's pathetic."

A beat of silence passed between you two, before Scot decided to come even closer, pushing you deeper into the cabin. From that moment, he was getting wet too from shower stream.

"Let me."

You blinked.

"What?" you raised an eyebrow, confused what he means by "let me." Let him what? Let him tell you another story how you are brave for the work you're doing, or...

"I'm gonna help you in washing. That's what I mean."

"You're insane. I'm not going to use you like that." you stated, clearing your throat.

A certain wave of embarrassment went through you, like you just realized how bare you were; even if he couldn't see your front properly, you brought your legs closer to your chest, defense mechanism or some sort.

It was another thing that hit you, when you thought about it – how he was always there if you needed him, even if you didn't want him around for his own sake. No matter what it was, he was there, to help you. To make things better, even if it seemed like the shittiest situation in the world.

"It's not like I would take advantage of you, you know that. You're in a bad state" he whispered. "Let me do it. Please. You're gonna do the front, I'm gonna do the back."

"MacTavish-" "-please." he spoke quietly, tenderly – you heard him like this for a first time.

It was a silent agreement to his proposition when you gave him the second sponge; you didn't think that you could say "yes" to it out loud. It seemed embarrassing, it seemed like another overcrossing of a boundary.

Johnny's movements were slow and silky, like he was afraid to hurt you deeper than you were already since you closed your eyes, taking a deep, shaky breaths to ease yourself. Blood and dirt were coming down the drain, making you sick even more with a thought of people that had to be left behind.

Thinking it was some kind of encouragement seeing how all of it comes off, so you won't see "memories" of the mission, you decided to finally scrub your front, giving the whole attention to it. Because you couldn't miss a single piece, you just... needed to separate your body from the events that happened.

Move on to another, to another mission the next day. Time wasn't on your side when it was coming to processing everything on your own, lying in your bed without purpose, trying to tell yourself you weren't a bad person.

No.

You were a soldier. Safety of the world was before anything, even before you, your mental health, anything.

Twenty long minutes, and the next thing Soap did was washing your long hair with certain softness to it, massaging your scalp. If conditions were different, you'd probably joke and laugh about it, teasing him how good he does it and maybe he needs to think about changing careers.

Instead, you were just silent, eyes closed.

You always insisted on doing things alone – you learned it was the best way to not be disappointed; if you don't expect shit from people, you're not gonna be sad after, right? The perfect prevention from possible heartbreak. Not exactly how Kate raised you considering that she always reminded you about making friends to make life easier, but... life verified a lot of things actually. However, lessons from your mom were still appreciated, of course, even if you didn't quite apply them to life out of... fear? Yeah. Fear of being disappointed again.

Better to build walls around you than letting people in.

Version of you before Task Force 141 would hate you for allowing Johnny to help you like this, but the version after, the version of you that lied in bed with him, the version that trained with him, the version that was his partner in the missions?

You couldn't help but appreciate all of it. You wouldn't allow it for anyone else but him, your rock, your person, someone that you trusted to the end of the line. Someone that seen you in your worst right now, and still was there.

"Everything will be alright" Soap cooed, which made you open your eyes to look back at him; his eyes locked in moment with yours. "I'm here, yes? I'm not gonna leave you."

He was soaked, you realized; just because he sat with you under that shower, still in his shirt and cargo pants that he was on a mission with, his boots kicked to the side. You wondered if he was even comfortable enough. Probably not, and yet, he was still by your side.

"Everyone leaves anyway." you said quietly, looking away from him, as soon as you said that, feeling how he tensed. "Not me, hen. Not me." he replied in soft tone – yet again, different than he used usually, and different totally from the one he used out in the field.

Amusing to think that man was shouting few hours ago to you to get down and with ease killed a man hand to hand with his pocket knife; such a contrast to his softness. Such a contrast to hands that held a gun, such a contrast to his voice, now sweet and dripping with honey, easing your nerves, such a contrast to his image in the field.

"You have your own demons, Johnny. You don't need here to sit with me and try to fight with mine, when you have problems. It's..."

"I do have them, yeah." he interrupted you. "I fight 'em when I'm with you – selfishly, in order to fight with them, I just need ya around, healthy and recovered. I can't do that when you're injured like that. Shattered to pieces."

He got up then and tossed you a towel to catch, while you still were bamboozled by his words; you caught it though, wrapping yourself around it quickly. Johnny saw your bare back, but he didn't need to see front.

"I'll meet you in your room, hen. Gotta wash myself" he hummed. "Or, you want to help me?" Soap raised his eyebrow, smiling with the corner of his lips – clearly, he wanted to cheer you up a bit.

"You wish, MacTavish." you replied, collecting your dirty clothes swiftly. You nudged him with your hip. "You want some coffee? I think I need one."

"Yeah! Give me ten minutes."

You spent with him two hours when he came from the shower – it was disappointing considering you wanted to talk with him more, but you had to wake up early to move onto next installment of the mission. The other thing that was different than normal? If you'd have another day off, your little chat would have alcohol involved, but in these conditions you had to be good, so you just talked with him, a mug of coffee in your hands.

Coffee at midnight, as always.

Mission wasn't one of the hardest – getting intel you needed in Mexico, asking civilians about some things, so you were pretty calm when you arrived at the place. Small village; Alejandro said something about "being cautious" with people here since they were sneaky and who knew better than him? That's why you were on high alert, even if Soap was making jokes of you having "stick up your ass".

Mostly he was joking, though, you knew that he appreciated that you had your eyes everywhere.

It was the dynamic between you two – him goofing around with you rolling your eyes at him or goofing with him which usually irritated the shit out of Ghost that tried to do his job.

Back then, you were in mood number two, considering what happened yesterday at night. Your mind was still partially in that moment, with his hands being all over your back and his fingers gently massaging your scalp with all of his attention. It felt so vivid, like he would be doing it in the moment you were wandering around small village, not the night before. You already missed his gentleness, his soothing words, and...

And you were far from admitting it fully, since you shook your head, scolding yourself in your mind to focus, not daydream.

It was nothing, he'd probably do it for everyone.

At least you thought.

77 notes · View notes

cdyssey · 4 months ago

Text

Agatha All Along (1.02) Reactions:

A couple of sober/somber notes play when Agatha opens the brooch and looks at the hair. I’m thinking it probably came from her kiddo. ;-;

Something that REALLY stuck with me in the first episode was that Agatha’s imprisonment was talked about in terms of lucidity. (She was sick, and the residents of Westview felt for her, CARED for her!!) So, like, seeing her “car,” which, of course, really wasn’t a car but a set up to allow her to safely act out her internal reality spoke to just how locked away Agatha was for three years.

Seeing “evil witch” graffitied on Wanda and Vision’s dilapidated foundation of a house broke something inside of me. SHE JUST WANTED A FAMILY 😭😭

Agatha throwing the teen’s pen out of the window ALSKDNSKSM. Also, loved the casual confirmation of his queerness.

This really is the gayest show ever <333

PATTI LUPONEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

Agatha LOVES putting on a show, which we knew as early as WandaVision, but she seamlessly slides into the southern widow act.

“You’ve been under the influence of another. Someone you hurt. They took your agency for three years. It’s not the first time your witch-kin have betrayed you. But you survive. In a way few do.” HOT DAMN!!!!!!!!!!

Ooh, the betrayal is probably referring to her mother (and former coven) trying to execute her.

LILIA’S LEGGINGS SKSLDJSN.

HOLY FUCK, the way that Agatha’s eyes are glistening after that absolute read. The microacting choices that Kathryn Hahn is making are DELICIOUS.

Watching Agatha tempt Lilia with the Road is soooooo good. She’s a master manipulator even after all this time. You always have to watch out with her.

SASHEER ZAMATA!!!!!! FUCK YEAH.

The coven so far is just like a roll call of former teenage obsessions. (I was really into Yellow Diamond and SNL fnfnndnd).

“Hey, where do you keep your jade eggs? I’m fresh out of marbles, and my pelvic floor is all over the place.” AKWKDIWIEJKSSK

Teen is right. Jen DOES look amazing. Living for that nose ring and that fucking popped collar

“Historically, we as a group don’t do well in courtrooms.” JQOQJDORWOWD.

Teen’s taking a leaf out of Agatha’s book to get Jen to walk the Road. 👀

“I’m gonna take a jade egg to go. You’ll know where to find it.” JAKWJDKWJSJS.

Obsessed that Agatha can’t go five minutes without making a disturbing innuendo towards another woman. <3

EATING THE PAPER. FERAL

“She’s a tough nut to smash.” CAN’T GO THREE MINUTES WITHOUT MAKING AN INNU—

Ooooh, when the Teen talks about himself, Agatha can’t perceive what he’s saying.

AGATHA’S CUNTY WITCH OUTFIT.

WELCOME COVEN!!!! SKWKDJJD

Ooh, Lilia keeps randomly throwing out tarot card names. So Jen is High Priestess, and I forgot the other one gkdkfjdjf. Oh, well

A BLACK HEART ON THE LIST. ARE YOU KDDING ME. GAY GAY GAY GAY

IT’S BLACK AND IT BEATS FOR YOU.

“That’s because you used a black pen.” Lmfao

“I know you get confused sometimes, but my real name is Sharon.” I don’t know why, but the people of Westview treating “Agnes” so kindly has REALLY fucking touched me.

AW. Her husband passed away. :(((

Lilia blurting out her premonitions is going to be used for such a tragic effect, I just know it

this song slaps holy fuck

THIS DARK COVEN. TERRIFYING

mrs. hart/davis getting into the song 🥺

CALLING PATTI LUPONE PITCHY EKWKWOWKDJWKWKKA

THAT FUCKING JUMPSCARE FUCK OFFFFF. GODDAMN

“I’d die before letting you befoul it with your noxious mediocrity.” GOD SHE’S SUCH AN ASSHOLE SKSKSOIDJD

I love her dearly

“It’s not my fault only a true coven can open the door.” QOKQKWURIWIWKWKSKWKAKS

I LOVE WHEN WOMEN ARE EVIL. I LOVE WHEN THEY ARE MORAL CESSPITS

“OH, I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS. JUST BLAST ME, YOU BITCHES!” WIQOOQIWIWIWIQPLQOWUDICIWIWKQJD!!!!!!!!!!!!!’nnnn

KATHRYN HAHN I LOVE YOU

I would die for this entire coven

#maggie blogs #s: agatha all along #agatha all along #I’m LIVING right now

8 notes · View notes

terrorsmade · 4 months ago

Text

his ears are still ringing from the clang of the shovel , head pounding so intensely that some rational part of him wonders if he might be concussed. it certainly wouldn't be the first time , matt's taken a couple good knocks on the field , comes with the territory ... but a shovel to the dome with no helmet for protection ?? yeah , that's a little more intense ... but it's not like he can blame jess , not in their current situation ... if he'd had any sort of a weapon , he'd likely have come out swinging as well but with the flare gun depleted and virtually useless without another flare to load into it , matt had abandoned it a long time ago ... definitely for the best. he's not sure jess could taken any more injuries. already , she resembles a member of the walking dead , so much so that matt had blurted ' how the hell are you alive ?? ' foot , meet mouth ...

he can apologize for that later , right now ?? they need to find a way out of this hellhole , off this goddamn mountain and --- jess speaks again , pulling him from his thoughts as he spins back around to face her. ' hey , no one's dying ... ' he assures , shrugging out of his letterman jacket and gingerly wrapping it around her shoulders. in her current attire , it's a wonder she isn't already suffering from frostbite. ' I got you , jess ... we're gonna get the hell out of these mines and --- ' and what ?? they're god only knows how far from the lodge now , matt already knows that the keys to the cable car are missing and attempts at radioing for help had been disappointing at best ... ' we're not quitting , alright ?? you didn't survive all the crazy shit you've been through tonight to give up on me now. '

@villainmade sent ; ‘I don’t think i’m ready to die.’ / ft. matt taylor && jess riley

#⋞thread⋟ ( matt taylor. )#⋞until dawn⋟ ( verse. )#villianmade

11 notes · View notes

animentality · 1 year ago

Note

(Leaps in askbox now its clear) Howdy! I'm curious about your opinions on the companions, like initial thoughts and now that you've clocked in an unhealthy (affectionate) amount of hours? We know what you'd change but how about everyone as is? Thanks!

Alrighty, I can finally answer this one...

Ok.

Man. This is gonna be a long one.

We're gonna start with the shorter opinions first.

Minthara:

I have not done a run where Minthara was alive in Act 2. I literally know almost nothing about her.

I think she's hot and has the sexiest voice of all the female characters, but I know nothing about her story, other than she was a lesbian with Orin. I do wanna try and romance her, but.

Who knows if I'll ever get around to it.

Minsc:

I get that he's a fan favorite from the old games, but I kind of hate him. He feels like fanservice, and I didn't get a nostalgia boner for him, so he does nothing for me as a character.

I honestly kill him. Not out of malice, just more out of, why even have him be here?

Plus I tend to go through the entire game without swapping my party members, because I'm pretending it's a real dnd campaign.

And I ain't changing my team comp for this weirdo who only shows up at the very end.

Sorry to his hamster when I kill him, though.

Jaheira:

She's ok. I don't hate her, but she doesn't do it for me. I don't get why she's Russian. And apparently the only Russian in the whole game.

She also feels like fanservice.

Plus she fucking drops ice storms on everyone's goddamn HEADS when they're already in Hunger of Hadar, and honestly?

We have beef. I let her die sometimes, for that crime specifically. I also skip her house, because it doesn't have good loot, besides the scimitars, and I don't play races or classes that use scimitars. like ever.

Halsin:

I like Halsin generally, he's inoffensive to me, but his "romance" is so bad. It's shallow, it feels tacked on, which it was, and everyone knows how much I HATE how little his sexual trauma is focused on.

I romanced him twice, and both times, I was underwhelmed and kind of shrugged him off.

He should just be a fling option like Mizora. He shouldn't have become a "romance" option. It's fine for him to be a big buff bear hippie that you can fuck, but a companion?

He's got nothing to do with Act 3. It's a detriment to his character and the game, tbh.

Ok, that's the smaller ones out of the way. Now mains:

Astarion:

I got into BG3 for Astarion.

I fully admit it. I saw a scene of him screaming at Tav for blasting him with the sun beam from the githyanki creche, and it was funny as fuck.

Neil Newbon is highly charismatic, and truly elevates a character I don't find that physically attractive. His personality and enthusiasm shine through, and his voice acting is superb. And I am a sucker for angst and redemption and themes of abuse and breaking free of toxic relationships. And darkly, I admit. I do like the more twisted nature of his backstory, the way he had to use his body to survive, has a bad relationship with sex, and was tortured repeatedly. As anyone who reads my writing knows...I am a disgusting sadistic pervert.

That being said.

I no longer like Astarion. Well. No. I like Astarion.

I don't like his fans, or his rhetoric. Astarion has the better writing of BG3, but the lack of nuance from his fans annoys the shit out of me, and overexposure to him as a character, since Tumblr and TikTok are obsessed with him?

No me gusta. I don't hate him as a character, but I can't stand to see Astarion is so perfect posts. He's not, and that's the whole point. He's awful, but you people don't appreciate that. I don't want to see Astarion x Tav headcanons. And I especially do not care about the BookTok crowd being obsessed with him because they just like a dommy vampire, and disrespect his narrative with absolutely no self awareness.

BookTok Astarion is SO GODDAMN BORING. They really just reduce him to a hot dommy vampire daddy, and that's why I never take BookTok recs. Pure garbage.

So. TL;DR - I got BG3 for him, but overexposure to his fans made me be significantly less interested in him. It's a good thing. If I was obsessed with Astarion, I'd be forced to interact with his fans. Thank god for Gortash... I'm free of that prison.

Lae'zel:

I loved Lae'zel the minute she was mean to me.

She's hot as fuck, like seriously, so hot, her neck makes me sweat something fierce, and her voice is sultry and raspy and hostile. just how i like my women.

But I admit...she's too fucking meta. gameplay wise, she's probably the strongest companion you can have for DPS...so I admit...I've had her on my teams so much, that I am sick of her.

And again! It's not because she's badly written. I actually think her character is really strong, and really awesome. I also think her arc is amazing, going from this devoted cult member to basically saying I'm going to fucking kill a god.

I actually teared up a little at the creche this one time, when I had to beg her to stay, and she was like, you knew I had no other path to follow, but this one, or something like that.

But.

But I have beaten the game with her in my party like three times. I've had her in my party on Honor mode like...a million times.

So, tl;dr - I love her to death, but gameplay wise, she's so strong that I can't play her anymore.

Shadowheart:

Ok...I admit it.

I don't like Shadowheart. I find her boring visually, because she's just this generically hot white girl. She was designed to be the companion that all straight cis white men would want to see naked, and that's fine but uh.

Does absolutely nothing for me.

I don't care for her personality either. I don't like her lines, all coy and vaguely condescending. I don't really like how mean she is to you, and it's different from Lae'zel, because at least Lae'zel came from a warrior culture that doesn't put much value on flowery language. Lae'zel makes sense.

Shadowheart is an amnesiac who's just mean to you because.

I also don't care for her story, at all.

Don't care about Shar's Gauntlet or her kidnapped backstory. Don't give a shit about her parents. Don't care that she's scared of wolves or that her hand hurts.

I like the overarching thematic bridge that her character exists on, specifically that the gods will demand everything of you, and will hurt you for their own amusement.

But as a companion...no.

I have never been interested in romancing her. I never have her on the party, except to get that achievement.

I also don't like clerics. I think they're kind of weak, tbh. They're heal bots. They're really only good for spirit guardians, glyph of warding, and removing status effects. Just don't care for that. I'm an all dps team, we have no room for healers.

TL;DR: I don't think Shadowheart is interesting design wise, story wise, or gameplay wise.

Karlach:

I loved Karlach the moment I saw her, I fell deeper in love with her the second I heard her voice, and I knew I would die and kill for her, when I saw her excited "I love you" confession scene.

Seriously.

I have said this before, and I will say it again.

Out of all of these characters, romanceable or not...

I would only marry Karlach in REAL LIFE. I'd never date a man like Gortash or Astarion. I might be friends with Gale, but he's too smart to be my boyfriend.

But Karlach. She brings the wife energy. She could throw me over her shoulder and bash me against the concrete, and I would say thank you, ma'am.

she's also so fucking fun to play. barbarian options in bg3 are so goddamn funny. you can intimidate everyone and just break shit. it's great. you can also constantly throw people AT PEOPLE. And it's great. She's way more fun than Lae'zel because of it.

No notes. Top tier character design. My wife.

But also FUCK the developers for only giving her two fucking quests, one of which is a FETCH IT quest and the other is just a lame boss fight.

And FUCK THEM for only originally giving her an ending where she either dies or becomes a mindflayer. WHY.

And the Avernus ending still annoys me, because the ENTIRE PARTY should be there too.

FUCK YOU LARIAN. Why do you hate Karlach???? You're monsters. She's never done anything wrong, and yet all you do, is wrong her.

Bullshit.

Wyll:

Ok.

Hard truth time.

Wyll is the hottest male companion.

Like.

No cap. Everyone who says Gale, or Astarion, or Halsin-

Incorrect. It's Wyll. He is literally so hot, with the white eye and those sexy throat scars. Hrrrrrrr.

Also, controversial opinion. I actually like his devil form.

I think it makes him even hotter. I do wish he had wilder hair, though.

That being said...

He's horribly underwritten.

I went in, thinking, he's so kind and nice and hot...and then I was disappointed by how little they gave him.

He, like Karlach, got hit with the cut content curse.

And it's so ugly.

And gross.

And honestly, I suspect it's racist.

But yeah.

I think he's really sweet and I like romancing him and all. But they didn't dedicate any time or effort to his romance, and I hate that. But not him. Never him.

TL;DR - my first impression of Wyll was wow, he's hot, I wanna know more about him, and my last impression is, wow, he's so hot, I hate that he has nothing going on because Larian simply didn't bother to give him shit to do.

Gale

Alright, I left Gale for last, because he has the MOST complicated relationship with me.

So I initially missed Gale, because my friend failed the strength check to get him out of the portal.

So for a while, I didn't even know he existed.

Then I started to see more of him on Tiktok and Tumblr, and I was like oh...ok. So...we missed him. Damn.

So I decided to try romancing him fairly early on....only to find out...

I absolutely despised that when he dies, he killed me with necrotic damage.

That pissed me off. In the early days, when I was new to the game, I think I once had a whole team wipe, because Gale and Lae'zel went down, and then Karlach went rampaging, set me on fire, and then died to Gale's necrotic...which is funny in hindsight, but it was annoying at the time.

The eating magical items thing was mildly annoying, but that was far worse.

I pretty much never ran Gale for a long period of time.

As the Dark Urge, I'd often kill him, in fact, just so I wouldn't have to deal with his Arcane Hunger.

And honestly, initially, I kind of disliked his personality too.

I think the first scene I ever saw of him was when you tell him he's ok in bed, and his response is like, I guess I'll go kill myself.

And honestly, I thought he had incel vibes because of it. Then add to the fact that he's rude to you, no matter what, when he needs his third item...and also add that to the annoying gameplay, PLUS the fact.

That I was rocking Sorceror and Warlock for most of my early runs, so didn't need a wizard...I said, no. No Gale.

I don't like Gale.

BUT.

Here's the thing, right?

I got into Gortash... and then I stepped away from Astarion. Started being obsessed with the Dark Urge...

And then I noticed that all of my Durgetash friends were super into Gale, and I didn't get why...

But then weavewithshadow specifically alerted me to the fact that... there are Gale and Gortash parallels...specifically, that they're both brilliant, scruffy, are blinded by ambition, can't appreciate the things they have, and keep chasing after things they can't quite reach.

And then I was like...ok, maybe I've been harsh on him...

So I did his romance...and I felt bad.

Because he's actually very sweet.

And his voice is reallllly lovely when it's soft and fond.

He's a poet...and then I felt bad for all the times I had chewed off his arm.

And honestly, with experience...I now know what to feed him. Mostly garbage magic items like Komira's dumb locket or the ring of color spray from the harpies' nest, or those dumb boots that electrify the water you stand in.

Plus, I'm smart enough to know how to keep Gale alive now, so the necrotic thing isn't an issue.

So.

So. TL;DR I had a very complicated relationship with Gale, first with his mechanics, then with this random out of context scene where he's kind of nasty to you. But I came around, and honestly...right now...I like him more than Astarion.

All he wants to do is...live.

And I relate to that.

And his romance scenes are nice, and he has more of an arc than most of the other companions, Astarion aside.

So there you go, anon.

This took forever to write.

Thanks for the ask, though.

#baldurs gate 3 #bg3

31 notes · View notes

spike-minoda · 10 days ago

Note

You know, I thank you so, so much for speaking out against LP and their hiring of Emily Armstrong. I literally just thought like, I was losing my mind or something. I've been listening to them since like, probably 2016? maybe, but I remember it was shortly before Chester tragically took his own life. In the beginning and I'm gonna be honest, I was happy that they were doing something brave like getting a new singer after we lost a legend like Chester Bennington. But after I found out that she's a Scientologist and knowing what Scientology is and how they see SA and mental illness that Chester suffered because of all his life, I just... Felt extremely disappointed, I felt like they were disrespecting the man I've been literally fucking mourning for 7 years. Everything he went through, all his pain... I never got over it. Without his lyrics and beautiful voice, I would have never survived. Then replacing him with a fucking Scientologist!? For God's sake, give me a goddamn break. I haven't listened to From Zero, and I don't think I will. I can't help but feel that they betrayed him, I don't know if I'm being dramatic or what, but those fucking assholes who kind of seem like they worship Armstrong saying we aren't real fans because we don't support her sent me spiraling, whether or not she's still in the cult. Hiring her to practically replace Chester was a bad decision, and I won't change my mind that they're just using the band's name for money now.

Sorry for the long rant, but I just wanted to get this off my chest. Thank you once again for speaking out and your bravery and plain class in dealing with the death threats and all that shit. Have a nice day! <33

You're welcome, Anon. I know how you feel. At first I was like, "Okay, new direction, let's see how this sounds." Even though, admittedly, I had no faith in Emily even then. And then we find out about her Scientology ties and I just… I noped out so fast. I've been a Linkin Park fan since they debuted, and it breaks my heart that they've done this. They're shitting on Chester's legacy… at this point, pissing on his grave (if there was one, thanks Talinda /s) would be less disrespectful.

You're not being dramatic, I also feel they've betrayed Chester. Mike has become someone I don't even recognize now.

Thanks, it's not easy dealing with the death threats and stuff, but I refuse to give in to them! <3

#linkin park #anti emily armstrong #emily armstrong

3 notes · View notes

beepsalotl · 1 year ago

Text

crying ugh i love these characters so much and i hate the world so much except i dont and i just wish i could have what these characters had and be in a place that isnt like this one

im gonna cry ugh i dont know why i care so much, theyre not even real. but, like, in my head, they are, yknow? as in, they exist in the space i built for rhem as i read the series and learned about them and their world

fun fact, they were the first two characters whose books (each is the continuation of the story from a different third-person-limited perspective) had their names in the title. black hardcover w green embellishments for moonwatcher, a nightwing. white hardcover w blue for winter, an icewing. books six and seven, respectively. all the symbolism was there before you even open the goddamn books. yin and yang. AND YET.

and also they had two different histories and their tribes had a stale feud for thousands of years bc of some asshole jerkface. moon knew nothing about it bc she was raised in the rainforest practically by herself bc her mom had to sneak away from the shitty volcanic island the nightwings lived on to hide from the historic nightmare jerkface. winter knew all about it (or he THOUGHT he did bc he only knew the icewing side) bc he grew up surrounded by heirarchy and laws and rules and structure. moon didn’t grow up with the resentment at all, which allowed her a chance to see the truth.

she had to be self-sufficient. he had structure to lean on, even if it made him narrow-minded and nearly hard-hearted. he had to break through that, and she learned how to have patience. i feel like moon herself is sorely underdeveloped but i take the hints i can get and i feel that she learned how to forgive him by understanding who he was through his thoughts and, after skyfire, remembering that he was different inside than out and was still struggling.

when they were together, he was trying to be better and learn and he was kinder and softer even though he struggled to always be like that, and she was so patient with him.

heartbroken enraged screaming ensues, really.

like the rey and ben situation at the end of tros.

having him die in the end undermines everything the skywalker legacy stood for and all the development he had and it still breaks my heart bc he proved people can make bad, horrible choices and can survive abuse and break through it and change and be better and be loved. and then he DIED instead of getting his happy ending, which practically is what happened to winter bc the author basically said fuck you go live in the mountains doing work for peace and studying scavengers (which i know is his passion, but….) and your friends will hardly visit or write and they wont tell you the truth about how they defeated the bad guy WITHOUT ANY OF YOUR HELP EVEN THOUGH YOURE MORE THAN CAPABLE and they wont trust you and youll be alone forever.

my list of pairings and characters that i’m unreasonably heartbroken over:

ben and rey, winter and moon, catra and adora, draco and harry, zuko and katara.

catradora got together, ik, but their story still breaks my heart no matter how much hope it also gives me.

anyway, there’s no way for me to end this bc i dont even know what im feeling. it’s been years but winterwatcher’s fate still tears me up inside with the way it dashed my dreams of seeing a character like winter learn to let himself be loved.

i want to learn to let myself be loved, but i dont know how.

these characters are my attempts at finding myself out in the world and seeing if it’s possible. i dont attach my self-worth to them, but it hurts to see them fail to find romantic love where i saw it. idk

— a quick journal entry i wrote in my notes app years ago, as an emotional 16 year old with identity issues and way too much alone time on my hands

#wings of fire #wof #winterwatcher #winterwatcher wof #moonwatcher #moon wof #moon #star wars #reylo #catradora #queer #journal #journal entry #romance #thoughts

19 notes · View notes

strangedreamings · 8 months ago

Text

HOTD S2E3 (spoilers abound)

I like that they buried the twins together. In together, out together. Rhaenys counseling Rhaenyra was also good.

Ah, Criston. The Peter principle made flesh. Dude, your impatience is gonna get you killed (keep at it).

Once in a while, one of the Greens gets the group braincell and actually makes a good point. Of course, it never lasts.

Rhaenyra and Mysaria. Emma is killing it this season, they need an Emmy and a Golden Globe (and whatever other awards they're eligible for), they make you believe the pain Rhaenyra is feeling with their voice alone.

Rhaenyra asking her stepdaughter/first cousin to take her two youngest to Pentos. I can understand why but I gotta side with Rhaena on this -- if she had a dragon (i.e. been of use in this war), Rhaenyra never would've considered sending her away. When is she gonna get Morning? (Or is the rumor true and Rhaena is going to be combined with Nettles and thus get Sheepstealer? God, I hope not. We need more WOC on this show, not fewer.)

I swear, Caraxes is the only dragon I can recognize from any distance, because of his neck. Harrenhal. I hope we see its destruction someday, I wanna see dragonfire melt stone. I think this scene of Daemon looking for whoever's in the castle is supposed to be tense (there's no music, it's like the show is holding its breath), but all I feel is bored.

I love Ser Simon! (I've loved his actor for years now) He's pragmatic, a trait that is far too uncommon in Westeros. Also, he's funny -- he pledges his loyalty to Rhaenyra then immediately tells Daemon the dinner menu.

Daemon, quit being so goddamn picky about your form of address. "King consort" isn't a real title anyway. :P

Ser Simon isn't going to survive this season, I'm sure. Hell, he might not even survive this episode if he doesn't stop calling Daemon "your highness."

"The throne?"

"It's a big chair made of swords."

Daemon, you're a little shit (mixed) but I love your sense of humor.

Oh yeah, Alicent has a brother. He was in the pilot, right? He's pretty, which is a blessing and a curse in Westeros. Dude, if you had any brains at all, you'd leave Westeros and never return. Your sister and father are full of shit, you'd be better off without them. Ugh, I listened to him say three words and I already hate him. He sounds like every rich man's son talking to someone socially beneath him. Criston, the concept of friendly fire doesn't exist in Westeros but I'm counting on you to introduce it.

Can I just say I love how Criston's Hand of the King chain is worn? It looks to be attached to his armor. It stands out more than just a pin would have.

Dornishman? Oh, right, this is before Daeron II, so everybody still hates Dorne, got it. Add "racist" to Gwayne's other shitty traits.

Criston, you're really fucking pushing it.

As much as I hate Alicent, I think Olivia deserves all the awards too. Alicent is barely keeping things together and Olivia is doing a great job showing that.

Was the raven/crow eating Cheese's eye truly a necessary shot?

The music as the army leaves KL is really good. Ramin is at the top of his game this season (as always).

"It would be treason." My girl Rhaenyra, standing up to these men who want to set her aside.

I love Corlys and Rhaenys together but I know Rhaenys has a ticking clock over her head. Rook's Rest is coming soon. If not tonight, then next week.

Rhaenyra sending her three youngest away. It's sad that Aegon III and Viserys II probably know their nannies better than they know their parents. Rhaena and Baela had a good moment but damn, we need more from both of them, the writers aren't giving us nearly enough.

Aww, Helaena smiled at Jaehaera and it was so sweet.

"I forgive you," Helaena tells her mother.

For what, Helaena? For fucking Criston when he should've been protecting your son? You're forgiving Alicent for that? I know you're her daughter and I know you've got a big heart but seriously?

Aegon II is wearing his namesake's armor? That armor is 130 years old, surely it's out-of-date by this point. And how far are the writers going to take this "I have no identity of my own" shtick?

I hate Larys but his actor is compelling. Looks like it's promotions for everybody this season.

These new Kingsguard knights are pathetic.

Ulf the White, huh? I'm THOROUGHLY unimpressed. Also, would it have killed the hair department to, you know, give him the white hair he was known for?

Oh good lord, Aegon II goes whoring and runs into Aemond.

Full frontal, really? I think the show is trying too hard to go viral this season. Shocking moments need to be earned and (except for B&C) this show just hasn't done that yet. (No shame to Ewan. Like Nicola Coughlan, I'm sure he wanted to be able to look back on this year in the future and remember how hot he was.) Did the color of Aemond's sapphire change? It's not as blue as it was last season (or maybe that's just the shitty lighting).

Baela should've barbecued those assholes.

Oh, Rook's Rest has been mentioned! The countdown has begun in earnest.

Young Rhaenyra and Jaehaerys? Daemon, your subconscious is fucked up. But hey, a guilty conscience is better than no conscience at all.

So that's the famous Alys Rivers? What the hell was that voice? She doesn't sound like an adult at all.

"Killing her would be easier." Mysaria, honey, you are so right but if she did that, we wouldn't need the promised third season.

Rhaenyra, your crush on Alicent is gonna get you both killed.

She's dressed as a septa? I can just hear the Rhaenicent fans now.

I'm 99% sure this didn't happen in the book. *side-eyes the writers* Don't start going off-book now, you know what happened to GoT.

"though not before I killed you." Rhaenyra, you could've threatened her in a letter, you didn't need to do it in person.

I can't stop staring at the beadwork on Alicent's gown. HOTD's costume department could teach a thing or two to Bridgerton's.

This is getting us nowhere. Rhaenyra, this was a very dumb idea. Get out now before Alicent (who couldn't keep her voice down if you paid her) calls the guards.

You know, Rhaenyra, if your family didn't insist on naming EVERY THIRD BOY Aegon, you wouldn't have this fucking problem.

"... you know what Aemond is." A loose cannon with mommy issues? Just saying.

Ugh, they're ending it there? No tense moment of Rhaenyra getting the fuck back to Dragonstone?

Yep, we're definitely getting Rook's Rest next week.

#hotd #house of the dragon #hotd spoilers

10 notes · View notes