#Hopper can't even be mad at Eddie for getting with Steve because he's such a good influence now
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artiststarme · 2 years ago
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College is for me but only if it’s us
No angst today, I just got accepted into my master's program so I'm thrilled! All humorous/fluff/good vibes stories today. I hope you guys like it and please leave your thoughts in the comments!
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It took Eddie three long years to graduate high school and even then, it was by the skin of his teeth. He barely scraped by with straight D’s and even then, his grade in history threatened to hold him back for his fourth senior year. Luckily though, with Nancy’s flashcards and Steve’s motivation while studying, he was able to pass all of his finals and his classes. Eddie army-crawled across the stage, ignoring the anger and slurs from the self-righteous townsfolk,  as he received his diploma. He waved to the Party sitting in the audience and smiled at his uncle. Eddie didn’t think he’d make it here but here he was
He, Max, and Steve were in the hospital for weeks following their Spring Break from hell. Eddie had had daily blood transfusions and enough skin graft surgeries to last him for a lifetime. There were still moments where he would feel ice-cold pain flash across his body in a spot deep enough he couldn’t reach it. 
Max was in a coma for two weeks before her blurry eyes opened to a world she would never see quite clearly. She still had to attend near-daily physical therapy sessions to be able to walk without the assistance of a walking aid for balance. She would probably never skateboard again.  
Steve was in a bad way too despite his reluctance to accept treatment. His wounds from the demobat bites caused him to develop sepsis that nearly killed him. He had to get his system flushed with saline for days to fight off the septic infection and he needed several surgeries to repair the damage done to his sides. 
Even still, they all made it. They were moving on with their lives and Eddie had finally graduated. His friends and Uncle Wayne were of course thrilled. They knew he’d graduate with time but he could tell that they were glad his attempts finally paid off. They expected him to devote more time to his music or get a full time job out of town or something. 
No one expected him to go to college. 
But when Steve expressed interest in enrolling in a local community college and some apprehension in doing so for fear of what their friends may say, Eddie jumped at the chance to take the heat off of him. And boy, did it. 
When Steve announced to the Party at one of their regular gatherings that he was going to college, he got some mixed reactions. Some of the Party gave uninterested grumbles, some asked if he was serious, and some pointed out that it would probably just be a waste of money since he wasn’t good at school. Robin was the only one, besides Eddie, that congratulated him on moving onto the next step. 
Eddie wasn’t impressed with any of them. No wonder Steve was afraid of their reactions, no one seemed to care and those that did were pointing out how ‘dumb’ he was. So Eddie did what he did best and created a distraction. 
“I’m going to college too. Steve and I enrolled together and if we increase our GPA’s enough, we might be able to go to a state school later. We might even move in with each other and get our own place.”
That caused an uproar. Mike and Max were arguing about why he wanted to go with Steve, Uncle Wayne was cheering and toasting him with his beer, Dustin and Will were congratulating him, Jonathan and Nancy were looking suspiciously between him and Steve, and El and Robin were looking on in confusion. But Steve was beaming at Eddie. He’d never seen smile so broadly, so happily. 
Eddie watched as Steve ignored all of their friends and stalked up to him. “Hey Big Boy, sorry to steal your thunder-”
All thoughts left his mind as Steve grabbed both sides of his face and brought him in for a deep kiss. Holy shit, Eddie felt like he died and went to heaven. If Eddie knew that this was what would get Steve Harrington to smooch him, he would’ve made plans to go to college with him a long time ago. 
Once Steve pulled back for air, Eddie started hearing all of the comments that their friends were making. He pulled back to see a variety of expressions. Some of their friends were supportive like Nancy and Robin who were cheering and wolf-whistling. Others were somewhat offended or disgusted. The most notable voice of the group was Murray who was screeching at Hopper. 
“I fucking knew it! Didn’t I fucking call this, Jim? You said I was out of my mind but I was fucking right!” 
“Murray, shut the hell up,” Hopper hissed at him. 
“Very much like you to doubt the truth, Jim.” 
“What is that supposed to mean?” He asked him. 
When Eddie made eye contact with Dustin, the kid leapt to his feet and pointed an accusing finger between him and Steve. 
“What the hell is this?” Dustin yelled in confused outrage. “You’re not even friends!”
“We clearly are, dude. And more,” Steve told him in a tone that said it should be obvious. Dustin just opened and closed his mouth like a fish out of water in response. 
Meanwhile, Mike was throwing up behind some bushes muttering nonsensically about Steve ‘doing it again’ and ‘hooking up with his brother too’. He obviously wasn’t over Steve dating Nancy all that time ago. 
Steve just shook his head at all of them and pulled Eddie in again. “I’m really looking forward to going to college with you.”
“I can tell, Big Boy. Kiss me again.” At his request, Steve kissed him again. They ignored the pitiful protests of Hopper, the fake gags of Max and Lucas, and even the supportive cheering of Joyce and Wayne. With Steve’s lips on his and his arms around him, nothing existed in the world but them. 
Sure, they had some talking to do and some shovel talks to hear. But they would get through it all just as they had before. Things were only looking up for them now. ‘86 really was Eddie’s year.
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steviesbicrisis · 2 years ago
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Zombie AU where Steve gets to an unhealthy level of "it's my responsibility to protect everyone" because when the Pandemic started, Barb Holland was one of the first infected and he had to kill her as she was trying to bite Nancy.
Even if it was the right thing to do, the relationship between him and Nancy has never been the same and he promised himself he would never get to that point again.
For the following years he trains, takes the most dangerous missions, always makes sure to be in the first line to protect his friends and somehow he manages to survive despite always putting others first.
It all changes when he meets Eddie. Who doesn't expect him to jump right in front of the danger to save him, who gets mad every time he does so, who tries the best he can to share the burden with him.
And Steve, for the first time in years, dares to be hopeful about the future, to daydream a farm where he and Eddie could live together, to let go of the things he can't control.
Steve dares to fall in love.
And right when he finally believes he deserves good things too, Eddie gets bitten.
It was supposed to be a simple mission to look for supplies in the abandoned trailer park, Eddie offered to go since he knew the place better than anyone else, and they were so sure it would've been a simple one they let Dustin go with him.
It only took an infected who was stuck in one of the trailers to get him. Dustin is in tears as he tells Steve how Eddie jumped on the infected to protect him.
All the progress Steve made thanks to Eddie, learning to lean on others, to not blame himself for fucked up shit he cannot control, goes away in an instant. Because Steve should've gone instead of Eddie, he should've been there to protect Dustin, he should've been bitten.
Steve takes his decision quickly.
He sends Dustin home with Hopper, he takes one of the guns and promises he will handle the situation.
He goes inside the trailer as they're driving away, Eddie is sitting on the floor, leaning on the wall behind him, a knife in his hand.
When he sees Steve, he is ready to protest and send him away until Steve shows him his gun. Eddie looks stunned, then nods slowly.
Steve sits next to him "I'm sorry".
"It's not your fault" Eddie sounds so convinced Steve wishes he could believe him.
Steve takes Eddie's free hand in his "I'll stay with you until it's time."
"Steve, you don't have to do this-"
Steve squeezes his hand "Please, let me buy us a little more time."
Eddie quietly stares at him, studying his expression, and he knows him so well Steve wonders if he figured out his real plan. If he knows that Steve has no intention to get out of that trailer without him.
Eddie's eyes get watery and he can't tell if it's because he's scared of dying or because he knows Steve won't use his gun.
Finally, Eddie nods "Okay."
Steve nods back "Okay."
Eddie rests his head on his shoulder.
And they wait.
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brbsoulnomming · 1 year ago
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Tell Me Sweet Little Lies Part 23
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17 | Part 18 | Part 19 | Part 20 | Part 21 | Part 22 | AO3
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They're on the front page for about a week.
They run the stories of Hopper and Henry Creel simultaneously - honestly, Eddie kind of thinks the fact that Hopper was presumed dead and is now back makes it easier for people to believe a previously assumed dead guy is the top suspect for the murders.
Eddie gets barely a mention clearing him of all charges. There's a couple of articles about him and Steve fighting off Henry Creel, but the focus is more on Steve than anything else.
Steve bitches about it, about how they did the same thing after Starcourt, but Eddie's kind of glad his name isn't plastered all over the place anymore.
He and Steve are down in the kitchen scrounging up celebratory snacks and beers - Steve has a clean bill of health, and Eddie's stitches are coming out in a few days - when the phone rings.
"Harrington residence, this is Steve speaking," he greets.
Eddie barely has time to decide he's absolutely going to tease him about that later when the response comes - loud enough for him to hear it.
"Steven, my boy!" the voice booms, spirited and affable.
Steve closes his eyes, the muscles in his jaw tightening. "Hi, Dad."
"We just heard the news!" Steve's father says. "Why didn't you call to tell us? Did the earthquake damage anything?"
Part of Eddie thinks he should leave. Or at least back away, so he can't hear everything that's being said - but the other part of him thinks that Steve'd push him away if he didn't want him here, and with how tense Steve's gone next to him, Eddie can't bring himself to pull away.
"The house is fine," Steve says. "Loch Nora didn't get hit at all."
"Good, good," Mr. Harrington says. "Your mother hears you and Rachel have been volunteering with the relief efforts?"
Eddie didn't think it was possible, but Steve goes even stiffer.
"Robin," he corrects, his tone smooth and entirely void of inflection. "Yes, we've been coordinating donations."
"That's what I want to hear!" There's a sound like a loud clap. "I'm glad to see you're taking this seriously. You had a lot of ground to make up for, but it seems giving you a dose of reality has paid off. We'll be able to have some real talks about your future soon. What? Oh, your mother wants to talk to you."
There's a shuffling noise, then a quieter and much less friendly voice greets, "Steven."
"Hey Mom," Steve's posture relaxes a little. "I told Dad we made it out okay."
There's some kind of response, but Steve's mom is too quiet for Eddie to make it out.
"No, of course I didn't file charges. I knew you'd want to handle it if anything else happened." A pause. "Yes, that Carver. Mom, it's not - yeah. Yeah, okay. No, it's just him. I think he's just mad that people listened to me and not him. Yeah, I - all right. Bye."
He hangs up the phone, leaning in with one arm braced against the wall, a long line of tension.
"Steve?" Eddie says quietly.
Steve turns to face him, giving a little crooked smile. "You can ask if you want. I don't mind you and Robin knowing. It's… easier sometimes, if she expects it, and it's probably the same with you."
Eddie aches a little. "What was your dad talking about? What ground to make up for?"
Steve makes a face. "I did a lot of damage to the Harrington image the last bit of high school, you know. Stopped caring about my reputation, didn't get accepted into any of the colleges they wanted me to go to, kept getting into fights."
"But that wasn't - did they even ask you what actually happened?" Eddie asks.
"They don't care what actually happened," Steve replies. "Just what it looked like. Like I said, it's all about appearances with them. My dad's the main reason I worked at Scoops instead of being a lifeguard again last summer - he says it's because I needed a real life experience, learn what it means to work at the bottom, but he was just pissy and trying to humiliate me. He talks a big game about working hard, but all he really cares about is how I make them look. Now that I've gotten good press twice, he's happy again."
Eddie's mouth opens, then closes, then opens again. "He didn't even ask if you were okay."
Steve shrugs. "I looked fine in the papers."
Right.
Appearances.
"Will you be mad at me if I punch your dad if I ever see him?" Eddie asks.
Steve laughs, a surprised little sound like he's startled by it. "No," he says. "But only if I get to punch yours for leaving you."
Oh.
If Eddie was thinking about it, he'd have moved slowly, making sure to telegraph what he was doing so he didn't startle Steve, but he reacts on instinct and pulls Steve into a hug.
Steve doesn't even flinch at the sudden motion. He just melts into it, letting Eddie wrap him up and hold him tightly. His arms come up to cross over Eddie's shoulder blades, the placement automatically mindful of his injuries in the way only someone who's bandaged them multiple times could be.
"Sometimes I wish they just wouldn't call at all," Steve admits, face buried in Eddie's neck. It comes out in a rush, like he hadn't really thought about it before he said it, but he's getting it out anyway. "That they'd just cut me out of their life, instead of stringing me along."
"Fuck them," Eddie says. "I've got you."
He can hear Steve swallow, and Steve hugs him tighter.
They stay like that for a long while, until Eddie finally pulls back.
"Hey," he says softly. "I'll get the food and stuff. Go upstairs and see Robin."
Steve looks uncertain. "You sure?"
Eddie hugs him one more time. "You've got two soulmates," he murmurs. "Let us take care of you a little, okay?"
Steve squeezes him tight, then lets go with a nod before heading upstairs.
Eddie dithers in the kitchen for a bit, taking an extra long time. Whatever his complicated feelings are, it doesn't bother him at all to give Steve and Robin some space like this.
They're talking when he comes back, which isn't a surprise, and he hears his own name as he gets closer to the bedroom. Eddie pauses, even though he shouldn't, listening through the cracked door. He'll feel worse about it later, probably, but right now the masochistic side of him can't resist the urge to know what they're saying about him.
"I want him so much, Robs," he hears Steve saying, low and soft like he's trying to be quiet.
"I know," Robin replies, her tone somehow managing to be both gentle and snarky at the same time. "It's kind of pathetic."
Steve lets out a muffled groan. "Not helping. I don't exactly have the greatest track record at being able to get over people! I thought, with my soulmate-"
He cuts off, and Eddie can't help the bubbling anger that springs up. Steve thought? Has he stopped for one second to think about how Eddie might feel, only ever having a platonic soulmate? Wanting him just as bad and not being able to have him, not being able to have anyone?
"-someone else?" Robin is saying, like she's reading his thoughts, and Eddie has to hold his breath as he makes sure he hadn't accidentally said that outloud.
"I don't want anyone else," Steve says miserably. "Just him. I think - I think it's always going to be him. Fuck, why does this have to be so complicated?"
There's a heavy, thick silence, and Eddie's anger simmers and crackles under his skin, the way it always does when there's a hefty mixing of guilt in it.
"Do you think-" Robin starts, then stops. "Do you wish-" She stops again, voice thick with emotion. "Would it be easier if we-"
"No," Steve says, cutting her off at the same time that Eddie realizes what she's probably trying to bring herself to ask.
There's the muffled sound of shuffling, quiet hitching breaths - probably the motions of Steve trying to reassure one of his soulmates that he wants her, and he imagines him gathering her close, pressing soft kisses anywhere he can reach, cutting off anything she tries to say with a deeper, fiercer kiss.
Eddie bites the inside of his cheek so hard he tastes copper to keep himself from making some kind of sound to give himself away. He hates that he doesn't know what he's feeling - hates that he thinks he's jealous of Robin just as much as he doesn't feel jealous of her, not really. He's jealous of the images he conjures when he thinks about them together, but he's never actually jealous when he's with them, when he watches them.
That reminder makes him shift, peeking through the cracked door so he can see them. They're sitting facing each other, legs all tangled together. One of Steve's hands is covering Robin's heart, and the other is curled around one of Robin's hands, pinning it to his chest over his own heart, and their foreheads are pressed together.
Something in Eddie settles in a way he can't explain, all thoughts of jealousy gone.
"There's no me without you," Steve is saying. "You're a part of me, Robs, I can't do this without either of you."
She says something too muffled for Eddie to make out.
"I'm happy. I really am, I promise. I love you, I love us, exactly the way we are. And with Eddie-"
Eddie leans forward, too desperate to know what he's going to say to worry about being caught.
"I don't need anything else other than just him. However I can have him. If it's never romantic, if this is us forever - it doesn't matter, not really. I just need you and him, and the kids, and I'm good."
There's silence, the two of them just completely wrapped up in each other, and fuck, Eddie - he thinks you know what, if this is it, if what he has is Steve and Robin and the kids forever, then he's good, too.
"I love you, Robin Buckley," Steve says. "In a way I never realized was possible, until you and that dumb kid showed up in my life and taught me that you don't have to do anything to earn someone's love. That sometimes, it's just unconditional."
Steve was sixteen when he fought his first demogorgon, Eddie remembers that. Which means he couldn't have been any younger than that when he started really spending any time with Dustin or Robin, which means - the same thing that Eddie went through when he first moved in with Uncle Wayne, the thing that was so impossible for him to believe at twelve, Steve wasn't shown until he was probably seventeen.
Fuck, his heart aches.
"Does Henderson know he was your first true love?" Robin asks, her voice a little wet, but obviously trying to make things a little lighter.
Steve laughs, the sound just a bit thick. "No, and he'd be insufferable if I told him."
There's the faint sting of a new lie being written on the back of his calf, and the second he registers it, he hears Robin's startled laughter. Eddie pulls back from the door, sucking in a deep breath and letting it out, trying to get himself back under control.
"Oh my God, Steve, you did tell him! When?"
He can hear Steve sputtering and deflecting, the sound of Robin smacking him and Steve scrambling - probably trying to avoid them - and if there was ever going to be a good time to announce his return after shamelessly listening in for too long, now is probably it.
Eddie pushes open the door, six pack under one arm and bags of popcorn and chips under the other as he shoots a hopefully only slightly manic grin at them. "What's Steve lying about now?"
"Nothing!" Steve says too quickly.
Sloppy, for him, considering Eddie knows how good Steve usually is at using sarcasm or half truths to avoid telling lies, so Eddie tosses the bag of popcorn at him.
He catches it easily, of course, but it means he's now vulnerable to Robin's attacks, and he has to swerve to avoid another slap to his shoulder.
"Steve's trying to pretend like we both didn't get that lie, too," Robin says.
Steve groans. "Fine, Jesus. It was back when we were waiting at the camper, and Dustin was upset. I told him that he was the first person who was ever just - there, in my life because he wanted to be, even after he didn't need me to fight demodogs. No one could ever replace him."
"You're such a sap, Steve," Eddie teases him as he comes to sit next to him and Robin.
"Shut up," Steve grumbles. "That's it, I'm picking the movie."
The next day, Lucas and Max swing by. Steve hauls a basketball stand out of the garage and sets it up in the driveway, and Eddie sits at the kitchen table, eating a bologna sandwich while he watches them play.
It's safer inside, where there's no one to see if he gets affected by Steve's tank top and shorts.
Or at least, he thought it was safer inside.
"Do you love Steve?" Max asks, plopping down beside him.
Eddie chokes on his Coke, and she stares at him unsympathetically until he manages to breathe again.
"He's my soulmate, so." Eddie shrugs.
Max gives him an unimpressed look, and yeah, okay, he figures they both know soulmates aren't a guarantee of anything. Eddie's parents were soulmates, after all, loved each other more than anything else in this world, and that still hadn't been enough.
"I wanted him to be my soulmate before I knew it was him," he admits, because that's a more true answer without actually having to say yes or no. "Nothing's happened since to change that."
She gets this look on her face like she's trying to decide if that's an acceptable response. After a moment, she rests her chin on her knees, staring out the window, and Eddie figures he's in the clear.
"Steve has two soulmates," she says after a while. "You don't. Doesn't that make you feel - I don't know, like you aren't enough?"
"Jesus Christ, Red, you're not pulling any punches today, are you?" Eddie swears.
He doesn't actually want to have this conversation. It's not something he's completely sorted out on his own, yet, even though he's done a lot of thinking on it, and he's tempted to tell her to mind her own business.
But she won't look at him, and he knows why she's asking. She's not talking about him and Steve and Robin, not really.
He thinks about telling her something standard about soulmates, or maybe even the advice that his uncle gave him, but it doesn't feel right.
"It's not what I always imagined," Eddie admits slowly.
Max doesn't say anything, but he watches the way she starts to unwind a little, how she doesn't hold herself so stiff, tilts a little to actually listen to what he's saying.
"You know Steve and I talked to each other when we were younger. We thought the same way about a lot of stuff, and I had this idea in my head that he was some little outcast like me, in another small town somewhere out there, that we'd move to a big city and find each other. But then we stopped talking."
"How come?" Max asks, looking caught up despite herself.
Eddie grins at her, wide and self depreciating. "I found out he was probably some rich, popular jerk, and decided I hated him."
And there's that unimpressed look again.
"Yeah, yeah," Eddie grumbles. "Let's just say there might be some truth to not talking with your soulmate before you actually meet them. Point is, for almost five years, I hated my soulmate. Thought the best I could hope for was that we'd meet when we were thirty and ancient, and maybe then he would have changed. Then a little while ago, I met Steve."
Max's brows furrow. "You met Steve way before that."
"Nah," he says. "I knew of Steve. I had a lot of assumptions about him, knew what I thought he was, but I didn't know the real Steve. That Steve I met when he helped explain all of this to me and didn't make me feel stupid for not picking up some of it right away, even after I held a broken bottle to his throat."
She snorts, but looks like she's considering that. "I met him when he was putting himself between me, Lucas, and Dustin and a hoard of demodogs, a couple of hours after calling them dickheads and me some random girl."
Eddie salutes her with his can of Coke, half in understanding and half to cover the way his heart wants to melt again. "That Steve was nothing like I imagined my soulmate to be, when I was daydreaming about him or hating him. But I knew I didn't want anyone else, and Steve having another soulmate doesn't change that. I don't think it makes what he feels for me any less than what I feel for him, and I don't think it means I'm less important to him than he is to me."
Max frowns. "Really, or are you just saying that?"
"Really," Eddie says, though he hadn't actually been sure it was true until he heard himself say it. "I'm not saying it's not hard sometimes. And sometimes I get in my head about it. But I wouldn't change it. Steve wouldn't be the same without Robin, you know? He wouldn't be the Steve that made me want him to be my soulmate so bad."
There's a long moment of silence. Then, "Would you be saying that if both of his soulmates were romantic?"
Eddie's glad he stopped drinking, because he knows he would have choked again. For a split second, she wonders if she's picked up on - but no, that still isn't what this about. "Are both of yours romantic?"
Her jaw juts forward, arms hugging tighter around her knees. "What if they were?"
Fuck, he doesn't know what to say to that. "It's okay to like both guys and girls," he says, because he feels like that's the most important bit. "I do. I mean, mostly guys, but sometimes girls."
Her grip loosens a little, but she still doesn't say anything.
"It sounds like maybe I'm not the one you should be talking to about that," he says carefully.
She scowls. "I talked to Steve already."
Right, of course she did.
"What did Steve say?"
"Steve said he thinks the line between platonic and romantic soulmates isn't as straightforward as people like to pretend it is. That sometimes what you might think should be romantic is actually platonic, and sometimes what you think should be platonic is romantic, and sometimes there's going to be things that blur the lines and you don't really know which one it is. He said it was okay to have two platonic or two romantic or one of each or, like, any combination." She makes a face here, like she's not entirely sure what he meant by any combination - or like she was sure, and didn't need that much detail. "That as long as everyone was communicating, it was okay to do whatever worked for us."
Eddie swallows. "Steve sounds pretty smart."
Max rolls her eyes. "He has his moments."
"So… are you communicating with Lucas and El?" he asks.
She picks at a rip in her jeans. "I talked to Lucas."
He waits, but it seems like that's all he's going to get. He starts to ask what Lucas said, but… he gets the feeling that it's not necessarily about what he said or not.
"But it's Lucas," Eddie says. "And you wanted to hear how someone else in a familiar situation felt."
Eddie gets that familiar, itchy feeling that he does when he wants to run, and he only barely resists the urge to bounce his leg up and down. It's not that he wants to run from Max, or even from this conversation, it's just - it's starting to make him think about things, and he really, really doesn't want an audience for this. He wants to lock himself in a room and pace, listen to some music, maybe scribble out his thoughts, something to get his hands moving and his brain in some kind of order -
"Even if Steve wanted both of us romantically," he says, knowing it's close enough that it's not a lie. "I would still rather be his soulmate than anyone else."
Max looks at him with narrowed eyes for a long moment. "I'm gonna ask Steve if you lied about that."
Eddie fixes her with an unimpressed look right back. "You think I'd do that to him?"
"You better not." There's an edge of menace in her tone, but she lets it go, so Eddie figures she doesn't really think he'd lie about something like that knowing it would be etched on Steve's skin forever.
Silence stretches between them, and Eddie follows her gaze out the window, watching Steve and Lucas playing basketball.
"I've put him through so much already," Max says, so quietly that he can barely hear it.
Fuck, Eddie is so fucking soft for these kids.
"You have not," Eddie says immediately. "You haven't done a goddamn thing, Red. Both of you have already been through so much, and it's not because of something either of you did. It's fucking Hawkins."
She doesn't look convinced, so Eddie pushes his shoulder against hers.
"Lucas is smart. He's more emotionally intelligent than I am-" Max snorts at him, and he's reasonably sure he hears her mutter something along the lines of like that's hard, but he ignores her. "He knows what he can take and what he can't. All you have to do is believe him when he tells you it."
She's quiet for a moment, looking contemplative. Then she asks, "Does that work for you?"
Right, yeah, okay, he deserved that one. He thinks about deflecting, but -
"I'm trying," he admits quietly. "What do you think, huh, you gonna let me beat you there or are we gonna do this together?"
Max glances out the window again, then turns to look back at him, her chin jutting out. "Steve loves too much, and he gets it thrown back at him too often. I don't think he really believes that we love him as much as he loves us, even though we do."
She says it like a threat, like she's saying if you tell him I said that I will kill you or maybe if you hurt him I will kill you. Either way, he'd be dead.
"I'll talk to Lucas and El, and you make sure you don't disappoint him."
Goddamn if that doesn't stab right to the heart of him, lodging itself beneath his ribcage and sticking right into the parts that'd already made him want to run from this conversation.
"Okay," he manages to get out, because he's not sure he'll survive any other answer.
Max nods. "Good talk," she tells him, and then she pushes herself up and she's gone.
Eddie stays there, mulling all of that over. He doesn't think she'd actually tell Steve anything they just talked about, nor does he think she really has any idea that Steve had asked him to make their bond romantic and he'd turned him down. Honestly, Eddie could probably get away with patting himself on the back for actually managing to give some decent advice and be the person she'd needed him to be for just a little while, then go on being a very devoted platonic soulmate for Steve.
Except even if Max doesn't really know, Eddie does. And now Eddie's thinking about things he doesn't want to, and wondering how much of a hypocrite some of the advice that he gave her makes him, and -
"Hey," Lucas says, and Eddie yelps.
Lucas raises his eyebrows at him.
"Jesus Christ, don't do that," Eddie bitches.
There's a little smirk, but fortunately, Lucas doesn't actually comment on it. "You talk to Max?" he asks instead.
"Yeah," Eddie replies, narrowing his eyes at him.
Lucas lights up, though, his whole face practically beaming with his smile. "Good. I figured it'd help her to hear that your soulmate cares about you no matter what from someone who wasn't me."
Eddie raises one eyebrow. "How do you know that's what I said?"
Lucas rolls his eyes. "Because you're Steve's soulmate. If that wasn't the way you felt, Robin would know, and she'd have already murdered you."
Eddie considers that. "Okay, fair."
Lucas makes his way over to the fridge, yanking it open and standing in front of it as he peers in. "So what did you tell her?"
Eddie sits back, waiting until Lucas turns to look back at him so he can shoot him a wide, smug grin. "If she wants you to know, she'll tell you."
He gets a glare in return, but Lucas doesn't protest that, just leans back in to grab a pair of Gatorades from the fridge. He twists the top off of one, taking a long swallow before he shuts the door and starts back out of the kitchen, giving him a little nod as he passes.
"Hey, Lucas?" Eddie calls before he can leave.
Lucas pauses, looking quizzically at him.
"I'm guessing you talk to Steve like Max does, about all this." Eddie makes an exaggerated gesture between them and out the kitchen window, meant to loop all of them in together. "But, uh. You know. If you ever want a different perspective, from someone in kind of your position."
He motions to himself, then splays his hands out all ta-da.
Lucas hesitates, lingering in the middle of the kitchen before he seems to make a decision.
"I was kind of upset about it when I first found out Max's other soulmate was El," he admits. "It was right after Billy died, and their soulmate bond was new, and Max kept letting El in while she was shutting me out. And I was angry, and jealous, and then when El had to leave and Max kept pushing me away, I just kept thinking that if El was here Max wouldn't be by herself so much, that the wrong soulmate got to stay in Hawkins."
Lucas pauses, twisting the Gatorades in his hand, but Eddie gets the feeling it's a gathering his thoughts pause more than a waiting for Eddie to say something pause.
"Eventually I realized that El could help Max in a way that I couldn't, and that maybe that was the point. I started calling El a little, too, when the phone wasn't busy, and just - El was grieving, too. I didn't want to feel jealous over something that helped them both anymore. It's been good with El back, really good. I don't know if I like El like that, but if Max does-" he shrugs. "I guess I kind of already got over the jealousy bit. It doesn't really matter to me if they kiss while they're having sleepovers or not, as long as they don't exclude me."
Now it seems like a waiting for Eddie to say something pause, so he gives a soft little hum. "What do you do if you end up feeling excluded?"
Lucas blinks, like he wasn't expecting that question. "Uh. Well, before, I talked to my parents and sometimes to Steve or Robin or Dustin. It's hard talking to Mike or Will about it because they're not all that objective about El stuff. I don't… really know if I want to tell my parents about Max and El like that yet, so I guess… talk to Steve or Robin or Dustin." He pauses, then, more tentatively, "Or you?"
Fuck, these kids keep getting to him. "Or me," he agrees easily. "But you should probably also add talk to Max and El to that list."
Lucas makes a face, but doesn't disagree. "I don't think a lot of the others know about Max," he says instead. "Just me and Steve and Robin, and now you."
There's an edge to his voice, like he's pretty sure Eddie must be safe if Max told him, but he's ready to fight him about it anyway.
"Max knows about me, now, so we're even," Eddie replies, pleased that the effort he puts into making sure his voice sounds steady pays off.
"Yeah?" Lucas asks. "Who else knows?"
"Steve and Robin. And now Max and you," Eddie replies.
Lucas lights up a little. "Cool."
"Cool," Eddie echoes, even though he feels a little shaky from the fact that he's now said it twice today, which is double the amount of times he's ever said it before at all.
There's a comfortable silence for a moment.
"It's complicated, being in our position," Eddie says after a bit. "I think it's always going to be complicated. But if we let it - I think it could be really great, too. Most people only end up in pairs, but us? We get a whole damn party of interconnected soulmates."
"A party of soulmates," Lucas says thoughtfully, then grins. "Yeah, I like that."
"You're a good kid, Lucas," Eddie tells him, not sure if he really needs to hear it, but he still remembers the way it made him feel when Uncle Wayne said it.
Lucas ducks his head, looking a little pleased, even though he follows it up with a sidelong look. "Even though I'm kind of a jock?"
Eddie shrugs. "My soulmate is a whole jock. I guess that means I've got a little jock in me, too."
Lucas's expression shifts, turning mischievous, and suddenly he looks like the fifteen year old boy he is, and not a world-weary adult. It's nice, it's wonderful, Eddie loves to see it, except it makes him realize what he just said far, far too late to do anything about it.
In his defense, they were having a serious discussion, and -
Yeah, he's got nothing.
Maybe it'll be fine? Lucas is probably the most mature out of all of the boys, maybe -
"I don't know, man," Lucas says, slowly, like he's actually considering that. "We've all heard the rumors about Steve. I don't think it's something little you're gonna be dealing with."
Eddie gapes at him.
"I said you were mature," he bemoans, flinging his upper body over the top of the kitchen table just to make Lucas laugh harder. "I told Max you were emotionally intelligent! Begone from my sight!"
Lucas takes his Gatorades and leaves, still laughing at him.
"Max cornered me in the kitchen to threaten me today," Eddie says.
Steve snorts. "Of course she did. What about?"
Eddie shrugs, waiting for Steve to look at him so he can waggle his eyebrows at him. "She also threatened to kill me if I told you."
Steve shoves him, and Eddie falls back dramatically, sprawling out on the couch. He props himself up on his elbows to look at Steve, but he doesn't seem inclined to actually push him to reveal what he and Max talked about. Instead, Steve goes about shutting down for the night, checking to make sure all the windows and the sliding glass door are locked.
"Soulmate stuff," Eddie says. Or more like blurts out, before he can change his mind, to force himself to have to keep going. "She told me what you said about the line between platonic and romantic soulmates. Made me think about some things."
"Yeah?" Steve asks, stopping by the couch to look at him.
"Do you still want me, Steve?" Eddie asks, his heart in his throat.
He isn't prepared for Steve to shut down, for the way his face goes cold and hard and blank.
"Not cool, Eddie," Steve says, turning away and going back to the windows in the living room.
Eddie pushes himself up off the couch, then immediately doubts himself and sits back down. "Steve, what?"
Steve won't look at him, and he can hear the window locks rattling with the force that Steve's using to check them. "You're being a dick, man, come on. You can't ask me stuff like that."
"I-" he starts, then stops, his mind scrambling a little. Is he too late? Did Steve move on already, even though he told Robin that he wasn't going to? Is Eddie so easy to get over that even his fucking soulmate couldn't keep him? "What happened to it's always going to be him, huh?"
"Jesus Christ," Steve says, incredulous, and Eddie kind of wants to cry a little because he knows that Steve has started saying that more because of all the time they've spent together. "You were listening to me and Robin? What the fuck, man, you still think it's fair to throw that at me?"
"Fuck you, Steve, I know it wasn't a lie when you said that. Am I so fucking easy to just stop wanting, or are you that fucking fickle?"
"Eddie, goddamn, is this - were you testing me? Is this you lashing out at me again? Because I can't, okay, not about this, I can't-" he cuts off, one hand scrubbing over his face. "I told you, I can't."
Oh.
Oh fuck.
"Steve, no, I wasn't teasing, I - it was a real question."
Steve stills, pausing right by a window. The light of the moon catches on him, highlighting parts of him in pale silver while the rest of him is warmed from the soft yellow of the living room lamp. "Seriously?"
"Come on, Steve. I just picked a fight with you instead of asking what you meant, and you're surprised I'm not sure you still want me anymore?"
Eddie can hear Steve breathing out, then in, then back out again, watches as he lets some of the tension bleed out of his body. "I think I picked some of that fight right back. I'm sorry, I just - all right, let's go back, and I'll listen without making assumptions, okay?"
Yeah, okay, Eddie can do that.
"Max told me what you said," Eddie starts again. "And it made me think about how smart you are." He wishes Steve were closer, so he could see his face better, at the same time as he wishes he couldn't see it at all. "How brave you are. How when you know what you want, you go for it, how you fight to keep it, how you own up when you make a mistake, how you work so hard to make all this work."
This is Eddie trying to be brave, he thinks. Trying to go for what he wants, to accept that they're going to have to work at this, that he's probably going to get hurt, that he has to trust that Steve will be willing to work past whatever it is that springs up.
It takes him a little too long, though, because after a few moments, Steve gently prompts, "Eddie?"
"Do you still want me?" he asks again. He didn't mean to, but it comes out anyway, all small and tentative.
"Eds," Steve breathes out. "I'm always going to want you."
He loves too much, and he gets it thrown back at him too often, Max had said, and Eddie swallows down the urge to ask him if he means it, if he'll still mean it the next time Eddie picks a fight, or every time he's an ass.
"I'm always going to want you, too," Eddie says.
Steve's hands twitch, and he looks like he's waiting for something - for a lie to show up on his skin, Eddie realizes, and Eddie knows he's going to have to do better than that.
"I want you," he says again. "Steve, I want you. I'll take you any way I can get you, but I just - this is stupid, I'm stupid. I'm making us both miserable because I was scared."
He's not surprised that's what gets Steve moving, and he comes over to sit by him on the couch.
"You're not stupid," Steve replies. "Not for being scared."
Eddie shakes his head. "No, but I am for giving into it. So I might get hurt, so what? I'm already hurting, wanting you so bad and not getting to have you, knowing you'd probably let me kiss you and not letting myself go for it."
Steve's looking at him, eyes all sharp and intense, like he's really listening to Eddie's every word, and hell if it doesn't make him feel just a little bit drunk on it.
"Talking with Max made me realize that I trust you. I trust you, with my life, with - fucking everything. I trust you to work through this with me, to figure out what works for us."
Steve runs a hand over his jaw, going up to pinch the bridge of his nose. "Yeah?" he asks after a moment. "You really - you want to do this?"
"So fucking much," Eddie says.
Steve's whole face lights up in a smile, and he leans in, one hand resting on Eddie's knee. "That mean I can kiss you now?"
Eddie barely manages to get out a please before Steve's other hand is sliding over his jaw, slipping back to push his fingers into his hair and cup the side of his face. Steve holds him there as he kisses him, and it's-
It's not Eddie's first kiss. But it's his first kiss that's ever really meant anything, and the soft brush of Steve's lips against his makes his heart stutter in his chest.
Steve gives a little hum, low in his throat, and then he's tilting his head to get a better angle, and holy shit.
Eddie pushes forward eagerly, deepening the kiss until they're both panting for breath, and even then they don't pull away. Their foreheads press together, lips parted and just barely touching as they share the same air. His eyes have closed at some point, but now he opens them to find Steve looking back at him, and Eddie smiles.
"How long do you think until Robin notices we haven't come up?" he asks.
"I'm okay with figuring that out," Steve replies, closing the tiny bit of distance between them to kiss him again.
I've got a pretty good handle on the outline for the rest of this now, so I'd say we've got about four more parts left!
-----
Part 24
Tag list (always happy to add more): @vampireinthesun @koibug @estrellami-1 @mentalcyborg @allbimyself26 @questionablequeeries @the-s-is-silent @whimsicalwitchm @a-gae-af-racoon @tinyplanet95 @n0-1-important @velocitytimes2 @swimmingbirdrunningrock @newtstabber @jcmadgirl @roblingoblin285 @lexyvey @paperbackribs @goodolefashionedloverboi @evix-syne666 @raisedbylibrarians @stxrcrossed186 @nightmareglitter @greekgeek24 @starman-jpg @crazyhatlady86 @imfinereallyy @manda-panda-monium @deleataecount @prideandsensibility @chaoticvictorianspirit @maydillydally @disrespectedgoatman @scarlet-malfoy @i-less-than-three-you @hbyrde36 @hallucinatedjosten @dragonsandgayships @arepaconchocolate @g4ys0n @novelnovella @bisexualdisastersworld @ghostofyourvampiregf @scarletyeager @pettrichore @nerd-and-nervous @hiimlevi @queenie-ofthe-void @cinnamon-mushroomabomination
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steventhusiast · 1 year ago
Text
@steddie-week day 5: established relationship
<- day four
--
"you think we're gonna get outta this anytime soon?"
steve looks over from where he’s helplessly watching the kids of the party bring all of their movie night supplies into his living room to see eddie looking at him with a somewhat desperate expression on his face.
before the kids arrived, they'd been having a date night. they'd already eaten dinner, and steve was just about to put his hand down eddie's pants to get to work on dessert when dustin literally threw open the door to his parents' house. so.
sure, he and eddie had practically jumped to opposite sides of the couch immediately at the kids' entry, but still. close call to traumatising the kids, and wouldn't that be a way for them to find out about them.
"something's telling me no, eds." he sighs, and leans back into the couch.
the kids don't even know about their relationship, so he can't be too mad at them for crashing his hot date.
"steve! come on man i wanna watch the goonies!" dustin whines from where he's dumping a backpack's load of snacks onto the coffee table.
steve's not really sure what he's supposed to be helping the kids with. they hadn't offered much of an explanation when they came barrelling in, except for a lot of talking over each other about how they have to watch the goonies at steve's because steve's the only one with a decent tv. it's steve's fault for forgetting to lock the front door, he guesses.
"steve!" dustin complains again, and steve decides maybe he can be a little pissed at the kids for unknowingly interrupting.
"henderson, do you ever think about how i too have my own life and plans so you can't just barge in here whenever and take over my tv?" he asks, letting his head drop onto the back of the couch to look at the ceiling in dismay.
he had been so close to such a good night with eddie. like, one handcuff-themed belt away.
"clearly you don't have a life, steve, because it's a saturday night and you're here with eddie instead of out on a date like you would've been six months ago." max retorts easily, and steve whips around to glare at her.
"you wound me, red. why is hanging out with me such a low point to you?" eddie gasps from the other side of the couch, one hand dramatically clutching at his chest. max rolls her eyes at the display, and steve lets a little grin take over his face.
oh, he can have a little fun here.
he and eddie have been talking about telling the kids soon. they're a good group, and seeing the world almost end four times really puts things into perspective when it comes to primitive controversies like sexuality, so they both know they'll be safe.
before tonight, the plan had been to tell them in a few weeks at the next byers-hopper gathering, because if steve's being completely honest with himself.. sneaking around and giggling to themselves as they make out in a bathroom, or a garage, or on someone's back porch, is fun.
before he speaks, he makes eye contact with eddie across the couch, and raises one eyebrow. he doesn't think eddie quite gets what he's about to do, but steve knows he'll be okay with it.
"who's to say i wasn't on a hot date before you guys barged in?" he crosses his arms over his chest to accentuate his words, and the kids all pause their chaos for a second to look over at him with incredulous expressions.
eddie's expression, meanwhile, has morphed from a confused frown to a slightly wide eyed grin. the manic look in his eyes as he watches the kids in glee tells steve enough about eddie being okay with what he's about to do.
"you really made eddie third wheel one of your dates?" dustin asks like the oblivious idiot he is.
steve levels dustin with a very unimpressed look, and pointedly shuffles across the couch until he's next to eddie again.
"i wouldn't say i was third wheeling, would you big boy?" eddie asks with a smile, and steve glances around the room at the still paused kids to see them all processing his words.
eventually, they all kind of shrug and nod to themselves, as if that makes sense after some retrospection.
"well, now i feel bad." lucas says after a couple seconds.
"i don't. shitheads did this to themselves." dustin grumbles, and reaches forward to the snack-filled coffee table to grab a candy bar.
"so what were you doing on your date before we interrupted? you were literally sitting on opposite sides of the couch." max asks, eyes narrowed at the two.
"do you really want the answer to that." steve doesn't even say it like it's a question. max's face immediately scrunches up in disgust.
"you guys are gross!" mike finally pipes up at that, and steve's heart drops a bit for a second before he sees him with his eyes screwed shut, and then mike continues to explain "it's like visualising my parents- UGH!"
"maybe we should go." lucas offers, and all the kids but dustin are quick to agree.
"but- my snacks!" he whines, but lucas just grabs dustin's arm in one hand and his backpack in the other.
"our snacks now, henderson. that's the payment for ruining our date night." eddie declares, and dustin narrows his eyes at the pair but lets himself get dragged out of the house.
"bye eddie! bye steve!" the kids all yell as they leave steve's house again.
steve and eddie stay where they are, thighs pressed together as they sit on the couch, for a few seconds. eventually, eddie throws a glance over his shoulder at the window.
"do you think they actually left, or are we about to traumatise them?" he asks, voice casual even as his eyes flicker down to steve's lips.
steve grins at him, and holds eddie's chin in one hand, lets the other settle on his thigh.
"that is up to them." he says softly, and then leans in.
they end up giggling through their kiss as they hear a group of shrieks from somewhere outside steve's window.
--
-> day six
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strangersteddierthings · 2 years ago
Text
Part Two of Class of '85.
-
June 6th, 1985
1. Make Sure Eddie Lives
Convince Wayne to move away? (how??)
Befriend Eddie sooner? (tried and failed)
Graduate Early?
2. Save Max
Stop Billy on Fourth July. Save Billy? Does he deserve it?
3. Help El With Powers. How?
Save Hopper? How to learn location of Russian prison if saved?
4. Convince Everyone To Move Out of Hawkins
That's all that's written on this slightly crumpled piece of paper.
Eddie hadn't even meant to read it; when he'd shaken out the grey sweatpants it had fluttered free, slowly falling to the ground, and when he picked it up to put it back in the drawer he caught his name. And he's always been far too curious.
Eddie knows as soon as he's read it that he absolutely shouldn't have. It's too late though. He's read it, he knows now, and he can't really unknow it.
This is the list of things Steve is trying to change in this timeline.
It knocks the air out of Eddie and his knees feel a little weak suddenly. He drops himself to the floor, one hand clutching the sweats, the other the note.
Make sure Eddie lives.
Eddie lives.
Which implies that Eddie died.
Eddie's not sure what that says about him, that he's never made the connection of Steve's soft I can't lose you confessions and that he might mean Eddie is dead, and not, like, having fled Hawkins before Steve could confess his lo-feelings or something.
He's never really taken the time to stew in what Steve meant because as far as Eddie was concerned, there was no losing him. Steve's already changed the way Eddie's life plays out; he's graduated a year sooner than he did in that other timeline. He's got a part time job at the local mechanics. And though he doesn't know details, he does know that still being in high school led him to the event Steve wanted to change.
Which was his death.
He takes several deep breaths. He's not going to die because Steve's already saved him so he can deal with this. It's not even an issue.
Moving past that. Save Max. There's no last name written, but both he and Steve know only one Max. Then the line below that. They both hate Billy, yes, but what's throwing Eddie off here is the written, then stricken out, does he deserve it? The use of save gives him pause, too. It says Make sure Eddie lives and save Max. So, Max doesn't die? What does she need saved from then?
This is when Steve finds him, entering the room with a, "Did you get lost, Eds? It's the top dra- oh," Steve is stopped two steps into the room when Eddie looks up at him.
"I didn't mean to read it but I saw my name and..." Eddie says, trailing off because he doesn't actually have anything to add. He's worried for a second that Steve will be mad at him but that thought goes as quickly as it appeared. Steve moves into the room, dropping to his knees before Eddie, hands coming to cup his face.
"Oh, babe," Steve's voice is gentle, his thumbs even more so as they swipe across his cheek. "I'm so sorry."
Eddie should be the one apologizing. He's done the one thing he wasn't suppose to. He's read the list! He knows the future! (sorta) "No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have read this."
Steve makes his I-want-to-argue face but it smooths over. The tone in Steve's voice when he speaks, sounding older than his years and so fucking tired, it break Eddie's heart. "I should have burned that. This isn't your burden to shoulder. I'll just take that and you can try and forget."
He's reaching for the paper and Eddie pulls his hand behind his back, away from Steve's grasp. "No."
"No?" Steve looks surprised. Honestly, Eddie's also surprised.
"You don't have to shoulder this alone," Eddie says, "I can help. We can fix this together."
It's strange to see hope mixed with sorrow in Steve's eyes. "I can't- there's so much I don't even understand, don't even know how to explain."
"Sweetheart, let me help," Eddie whispers, shifting to his knees to easily slide into Steve's space, press soft kisses to his face between his words," I (kiss) want to (kiss) help (kiss). Let me (kiss)."
On the last kiss Steve angles his face, capturing Eddie's lips with his own, his hands still on Eddie's face allowing him to hold Eddie steady as he presses in, deepens the kiss, runs his tongue along Eddie's lip and Eddie flicks his own tongue out in return. They kiss in an odd, calm-but-desperate, deep-but-lazy, soft-but-messy way. They end it panting, foreheads pressed together to feel grounded, Steve's hands still on Eddie's face, Eddie's hands braced on Steve's thighs as he leans into him.
"Once you know, you can't unknow. It's fucking terrible, Eds," Steve whispers, "I don't want to do that to you. I don't want you to hurt."
"But you hurt," Eddie counters, "and if you hurt, I hurt. Thems the rules."
Steve laughs and kisses him again, just a quick closed lip peck, "Dustin told me once, you die, I die. Mutual destruction really shouldn't be the first go-to for showing affection for the people I care about it."
"Says the man whose favorite way to show affection is stepping between someone and a fist, or claw, or whatever."
Steve rolls his eyes and pulls back. "Weren't you going to shower?"
"Plans change. We gotta finish arguing about you telling me about this," he waves the paper, now even more crumpled, between the two of them, "so that you can let me help."
"How about you take that shower, and meanwhile, I'll cook dinner and think about finishing this 'argument' you want to have," Steve says, and even though Steve doesn't physically make the air quotes motion, Eddie still hears it in his voice.
Eddie concedes on this, though, and after stealing a soft shirt from Steve's closet, does go shower. When he's done, he takes his time detangling his hair and towel drying it as much as he can before changing into the pilfered clothing and going down to dinner. Steve is washing up the dishes he used while cooking (because this fucker cleans as he goes, what kinda sicko does that?) so, Eddie gathers plates and utensils and sets the table (because they're the kinda sickos that eat at a dinner table) .
Dinner is pork chops, mashed potatoes, and green beans. It's delicious.
They just chat about the day under the silent agreement that serious conversations were for after dinner. Eddie packages up leftovers and wipes down the counters while Steve finishes dishes and Jesus Christ when did they become so normal and adult?
Well, Steve's been an adult for a while, technically, but also, he's still just barely 18 and that's just- Eddie tries not to think about it too much, the difference between Steve's age in relation to the amount of time it's been since he was born, but also since he was forced? chosen? made to? relive 3 years of his life again.
"Alright Stevie," Eddie says, crawling into his lap on the couch, his legs bracketing Steve's, pulling Steve into him, Steve's head on his chest and his head resting atop Steve's, a mirror of their first interaction, at that party that feels so long ago and also just like yesterday, "I do have a question about your list that I feel is safe to ask and for you to answer."
"Hmm?" Steve hums back, arms wrapping around Eddie as Steve nuzzles against him.
"Befriend me got crossed out, so getting me to graduate early was the option you seemed to be going with. Obviously, befriending me ended up working. So, how in the hell did you plan to make me graduate early if we weren't friends?"
Steve snorts a laugh and says, "you're gonna laugh at me."
"Of course, I am. Tell me anyway."
"I was going to attempt doing your homework and turning it in on your behalf. I even practiced making my handwriting look different."
Eddie does laugh at him, so much that his sides start to hurt, and he would have fallen off of the couch if Steve wasn't holding him so tightly.
Then Steve has the fucking nerve to say, without the slightest hint of embarrassment, "told ya you'd laugh at me."
Well, Eddie's got no choice but to take Steve's face in his hands and kiss him senseless after that.
"Can you tell me what you mean by save Max?" Eddie asks when the kissing is done and the mood changes to serious again.
"Eds-"
"No, listen. I was thinking in the shower and like, I'm not going to get all philosophical on you, but I do think you can tell me, and we can figure out things together, maybe, and I won't interfere or do anything to, like, jeopardize the timeline. Just listen and troubleshoot."
Steve pulls back from their cuddling to eye Eddie skeptically. "I don't believe any of that for a second."
"Yeah," Eddie sighs, sagging forward to rest against Steve as he leans back against the couch now, "I just- I want to save Max, too. Let me help."
"It should have been someone else."
Eddie hears the cut off sob, presses himself down like a weight blanket, "someone else?"
"To get the second chance, the do over," Steve says, voice wet and pained, "it should have been someone else. Someone who-who remembers shit, and actually knows things. Someone smarter. I'm so afraid that I'm going to fuck this up. But then I feel like shit for wishing this was someone else's problem instead of mine."
"But it wasn't someone else," Eddie says, "it was you." Then he waits for Steve to collect himself and speak.
"The Party, they think I shouldn't tell anyone," Steve presses a kiss to the top of Eddie's head that he hears more than feels, "if I change too much, I could end up fucking up a thing that has to happen for us to win. I shouldn't tell people, or warn them, because if they make decisions based on knowledge they shouldn't have? That could get someone killed."
"So tell someone not involved. Or someone who isn't involved yet. Someone not around during the events. Then none of you are making decisions you wouldn't have already been making, but someone behind the scenes can change things. Maybe even last minute?"
That seems to give Steve pause. Eddie wants to pull back to look at him, his thinking face is adorable, but instead he shoves his face into Steve's neck and just breathes him in.
"That- I hadn't even thought of..." Steve kisses Eddie's temple, "Eddie, baby, you're a fucking genius."
"I know but it's great to have it acknowledged."
"Alright, off, I've gotta make a phone call before it gets too late," Steve says, shoving at Eddie. Eddie goes willingly, rolling a full 360 off Steve's lap so he's kneeling on the couch, elbows resting on the back of it. His eyes stay on Steve, though, tracking him as he stands, adjusts his shirt as if anyone but Eddie can see him now, before moving to the phone. It's not mounted to the wall in the living room, just sat on its own table in a corner, chair nearby.
If Eddie's gaze drifts down to Steve's butt while his back is turned, dialing whoever he's calling, well, Eddie's got no shame in that. He's allowed to look.
"Hi Hopper, it's Steve. I need you to get Dr Owens to get a hold of me. I know you have a way. No- you've got to- ok. No. Yes, this is important. Something- there is something else coming. We're not in the clear yet. No! You know I cannot tell you that. We all agreed that I wouldn't tell you anything! Hop- Hop- HOPPER. I promise, I swear on my life, El will be fine. She'll be okay. I... I just need to talk to Dr Owens. Thank you. Have him call on a Tuesday, I'm always off on Tuesdays."
Eddie listens in on the whole conversation, because if it was meant to be private, Steve would have used the kitchen phone, or the one in his room. Rich people have more than one phone, Eddie's learned. Excessive. "Sounds like it went well?"
Steve wrinkles his face in a grimace. "It's still weird as fuck. They know I'm not lying about the future thing. Not when- ever since-"
Steve can't say it again, but Eddie knows what he's talking about.
Bob Newby.
Steve blames himself hard for him. With whatever happened before Steve's time travel shit -the thing that was so bad something answered Steve's prayers and wishes to change it- Steve hadn't even been thinking about Bob. It wasn't until Steve saw Bob at the Hawkins Lab that he remembered the outcome.
He'd tried to change it, to save Bob, but in doing so he'd just endangered himself more and then Bob's death, his sacrifice, had been in protecting Steve instead of the surprise attack that had apparently been what took him last time.
Steve still can't look Joyce in the face, much less meet her eye.
Eddie hates that there's nothing he can say to alleviate this guilt from Steve. He's tried but Steve... Eddie won't even forget how his voice cracked when he said 'I knew he was going to die! I knew it, should have remembered it, but instead of someone without several concussions and memory issues getting a second chance, it's me! The fuck up! I didn't remember Bob and now, this time, it's my fault he's dead.' And Eddie didn't have the words to make it better.
Still doesn't.
"So, he's going to have the Owens dude call?"
"He's going to try," Steve says, "but can't promise. So, we'll see."
-
June 24th, 1985
Steve is in the bathroom when it happens. The phone rings, and Eddie's in the kitchen, so he picks it up, and says, "Harrington residence."
"Is this Steve Harrington?"
"Uh, no, but if we just wait a moment he'll be available soon."
The voice on the other end hums, "I do have a time limit to this call."
What an odd thing to say- oh. Oh shit. "Dr Owens?"
There is silence on the other end and Eddie's afraid he's fucked this up for Steve until he hears, "and just what else has Steve Harrington told you?"
Eddie's got a choice to make now. He can lie, or he can tell the truth. Both options have consequences, he thinks, but Eddie knows what he wants to outcome to be, so he moves to get line of sight on the hallway Steve should soon be appearing from and says, "Just listen, please. I don't know nearly enough but I want to help. I can help. Listen to what Steve has to tell you, and fucking believe him. If you think I can help with anything after that, call again on Saturday. Between ten and two."
"I'll listen," is the only response he gets, and they sit on the line for what feels like an eternity before Steve comes into view. Eddie shouts his name into the receiver, feeling bad about that only after Steve's taken the phone and Eddie has retreated to the backyard, both to smoke and to give Steve privacy.
Steve is on the phone for almost four full hours. Thirty minutes into the call, Eddie suggests he take the call to his room, so he can at least sit down. Steve agrees and hands the phone to Eddie, who listens for the confirmation that Steve has picked up the upstairs phone before he hangs up the downstairs one.
As much as he wants to eavesdrop, he wants Steve's trust more. Steve is trusting Owens, and if Owens decides it, he'll get ahold of Eddie. If there's nothing Eddie can do to help, then he'll just have to be here for whatever the aftermath is.
-
June 29th, 1985
To say that Eddie is shocked that when he answers the phone on Saturday and it's actually Dr Owens on the other line would be an understatement. He knows he offered, and he hoped, but no amount of hope makes something happen.
"Your juvenile record leaves a lot to be desired, Edward Munson," Dr Owens says in leu of any other greeting when Eddie picks up with the usual 'Harrington residence'. Eddie doesn't like that the government wasted no time digging into him. He really doesn't like that Dr Owens know his name. "I am not one to hold someone to past mistakes. You wanted to help, and reluctant though I am to admit it, there is something you can do."
"Anything."
"Alright. What you need to do is be at the Fourth of July carnival, on the lookout for Joyce Byers and Jim Hopper. They'll get there later in the day, but I don't have an exact time for you. As soon as you've found them, tell them to go to Starcourt Mall because that's where the kids are. Then you go home."
Eddie wants to know why he can't come with them to the mall but knows better than to do that. "Okay, I can do that."
"I hate to be the one to remind you, but lives are at stake here. Do what I've told you and nothing else."
"I know."
"And..." Eddie can hear the hesitation in his voice, "and just know you might not see some people you are used to seeing in the days leading up to the Fourth. Don't go looking for them."
Jesus H Christ. How is Eddie supposed to not do that? How is he supposed to be okay with people being missing? He must take too long to confirm because Dr Owens speaks again.
"Edward. I promise you, they will all make it through this."
"Okay."
Hanging up with phone feels very final. He doesn't like that Dr Owens didn't assure him of their physical safety. Didn't say they'd be okay. Or that they'd be unscathed. It was basically the nicest way the guy could have said no one you care for dies this time.
-
July 4th, 1985
Eddie spends all day at the damn carnival. He posts up around noon, which is probably way too early but he's not going to fuck this up. He hasn't seen Steve in two days and he's trying not to freak out. Dr Owens said they'd all live but fuck, in what condition? Eddie doesn't know what's happening, what was supposed to have happened without Dr Owens involved, and hates that he doesn't know how these changes Dr Owens are making to the timeline will effect Steve.
In the other timeline he knows that Steve lives, at least. This time...
The sky starts to darken when a Cadillac pulls up hot and going much faster than it should be, flying past Eddie's van to find parking closer to the entrance of the carnival. It could just be some drunks excited to ride a Ferris Wheel but Eddie's going to investigate.
Eddie recognizes Hopper instantly, the unfortunate side effect of being with Steve. The Chief of Police has become a common occurrence, with Steve inviting everyone over for pool parties, or them being invited to the Byer's for Barbeques.
"Hopper! Joyce!" Eddie yells, getting their attention before they've made it past the last row of cars to the entrance.
"Eddie! Thank God!" Joyce rushes to him, Hopper hot on her heels, along with two people he doesn't recognize. "Where are the kids?"
"Starcourt Mall," Eddie says, "you have to get to Starcourt Mall as soon as you can."
Hopper looks back to the Cadillac, then to Eddie's van. "Everyone in the van."
"Oh, I'm not supposed to-"
"Van. Now."
Eddie scrambles into the driver's seat, buckling up as Hopper ushers the strangers and Joyce in before pulling the doors closed behind him. "Get a move on it, kid!"
Eddie starts the van and guns it. It'll be fine. He'll drop them off and then go home and wait. Like he's supposed to.
Except that doesn't happen. Hopper orders him to drop them off near the entrance, then park in a far back corner and wait. And how can Eddie argue with the Chief of Police?
It does give Eddie a view he never thought he'd see outside of horror movies. About an hour passes before another car pulls into the parking lot, stationing itself facing the mall, and the Wheeler's car still parked along the curb. The headlights on the car go out, and just as Eddie is leaning forward to try and get a better look at the car, something climbs atop the mall, pulling his attention from the car and holy shit what the fuck is that thing.
Eddie clamps both his hands over his mouth to stop from screaming. Then that thing drops into the mall and someone steps out of the car. The person makes it three steps from their car before what looks like the entire US military floods out the entrance of Starcourt, and several military vehicles come barreling around the mall, probably from the employee parking area.
Then there's a knock on Eddie's window and he's fairly certain he almost pisses himself in fear. He whips his head around to look and he just sees some older guy frowning at him.
"Edward," the man's voice is slightly raised but familar, "I believe I told you to go home."
"Holy shit!" Eddie unlocks his door and shoves it open, forcing Dr Owens to step back. Eddie goes to climb out but his seatbelt chokes him because he forgot he was still buckled in. He unbuckles but Dr Owens has moved back into his space, keeping him in his van.
"I'm Sam Owens," he finally, officially, introduces himself. "Care to explain?"
"Hopper made me do it."
Dr Owens doesn't even look surprised. He looks away from Eddie now, towards the flurry of movement happening around the mall. Eddie's eyes follow and he watches as Billy Hargrove, who he can now make out thanks to the spotlights from the fucking helicopters, gets tackled by two men twice his size.
"You're going to save him, right?" Eddie asks.
At that, Dr Owens does look surprised. "We're going to try."
He thinks of Steve's note. Save Max. Save Billy. "You better succeed."
Dr Owens looks like he agrees. He also lets Eddie stay. Make him sit in his car like he's in time out, and it feels like forever, but as soon as everyone Eddie's come to care about comes out the front door, Dr Owens tells Eddie to follow him, and they go join the group.
Steve looks beat to shit and Eddie runs to him, pulling himself back before he can fling himself at Steve and pull him into his arms.
"Jesus, Stevie!" Eddie says, taking in his puffy eye and split lip, and he can't stop the hand that reaches out to touch even though he absolutely should not be reaching for him in public- Steve slams into him, tucking his face into Eddie's neck. He doesn't hesitate to wrap his arms around Steve, starts whispering, "I've got you. I'm here and I've got you."
Steve finally pulls back when Joyce approaches, "Steve, let the paramedic look at you."
Steve steps back then but doesn't put distance between them. It reminds Eddie of what he said at graduation. 'I'm not afraid of a single person in this town'. Eddie wishes he wasn't afraid, either.
"Come with me?" Steve asks. Eddie nods, and follows.
They wait while Robin Buckley gets looked over, then it's Steve's turn. Robin takes Steve's place beside Eddie and they watch as Steve is examined. Eddie sees Robin giving him sideways glances, like she's afraid to fully look at Eddie, which is... something.
Once Steve is freed from the medic he steps up on Eddie's other side, the one Robin isn't stationed at, and says, "I need to talk to Owens before we can leave."
"Oh, uh, I'm kind of the Byers' and Hopper's ride. And the weird dudes they came with. They don't speak English."
Steve barks out a laugh at that. "Murray speaks English. And hooboy did we have to hear it from him. He doesn't trust the government."
Eddie doesn't know which of them was Murray, but he agrees. He gestures towards the mall, which some people seem to actively throwing gasoline on in an attempt to burn it faster? Eddie doesn't know. "Well, can't say I trust 'em either if this is the result."
"This is the Russian government's fault," Robin says.
"Oh, no, the Russians wouldn't be this kind of particular problem without our government," Steve says.
Robin just blinks at him. "Are we... still drugged?"
"You were drugged!?" Eddie whips around to Steve.
"Truth serum," Steve nods then seems to realize how quickly he said that and frowns. "It's taking longer to wear off. Or maybe this whole issue was resolved sooner than last time?"
"Shhhh!" Eddie shushes him with a hand on his mouth, looking frantically at Robin to see if she caught was Steve just said. "Stevie. Do not talk anymore tonight."
Steve licks his palm.
-
July 13th, 1985
It's an uncomfortable gathering around the table. Dr Owens, Chief Hopper, El, Joyce Byers, Steve, and Eddie are sitting at the Harrington dining table. They've all only just sat down, eyes on Steve.
"What do you mean you can't find me?" Steve asks as a whisper. With how silent it is, though, everyone hear.
El frowns. "You are gone. I cannot find you like I could Billy, or Dad, or Dr Owens. I do not know why."
After El had some rest and recovery, Steve had asked if she would look in his memories. Or be present while he remembered them. It was Dr Owens idea; maybe El could remember details that Steve himself did not pick up consciously, but heard to saw nonetheless. They'd attempted it last night to no success.
"Perhaps this has something to do with what... brought you back to this time," Dr Owens says, picking his words carefully with how slowly they left his mouth.
Steve nods before slumping in his chair, his brows furrowing as he thinks. Eddie thinks he's ridiculously cute when he makes that face. Joyce asks Dr Owens a question but Eddie's focus is on Steve. They're sitting next to each other, so he braves bumping his knee against Steve's. Steve responds by flashing him a smile and immediately hooking his ankle around Eddie's before falling back into his thoughts.
Eddie half listens to the conversation around him, half worries about Steve and what it means for him that El cannot find his mind. That being a by-product of the time travel thing seems logical. If Steve's consciousness was dropped into a younger body, the two minds couldn't exist at the same time. So perhaps, because El is searching for a Steve that, technically, no longer exists, she might not be able to find him?
"What about Project NINA?" Steve asks, bringing all conversation to a halt.
"How do you know-" Dr Owens cuts himself off. "No, I know how. Better question. What happened that we needed to actually use Project NINA?"
Steve looks haunted again, like he does when he remembers the timeline he destroyed. "Vecna happens. Spring break of '86. I- we can't talk about that here. I think- he can get inside people's head. Read their minds."
No one says it out loud, but everyone's eyes go to El for a moment and she looks uncomfortable.
"What if," Steve starts, like he's having a realization himself, "what if the reason I can't be found is for my protection? Vecna can read minds, get in there and make you think things- what if I'm being protected by whatever sent me back? Vecna doesn't know that I know what he's up to, 'cause he can't read my mind and know what happens in the future. Can't stop me from trying to stop him! Project NINA is like, a bring back memories thing, right? Take me there. Set it up away from Hawkins and take me there."
They discuss some more, trying to say a lot without saying anything incase Vecna was listening in right now. That's a thought that will keep Eddie up for months.
It's gets decided on that El will go with, to be able to try and reach Steve while he's trying to find his own memories. Hopper is going with because he's not letting El go alone, and that's when Eddie speaks up.
"Then I'm coming, too."
"Eds," Steve looks torn, like he wants to smile and frown at the same time.
"No. If Hopper's going for El's emotional support, than I'm coming for yours."
It's decided. Dr Owens will work on Project NINA, and arrange for them all to be picked up when it was ready.
"One last thing," Steve says, "once you're away from Hawkins, call me. There's someone I don't want involved in this. He's done enough damage. Oh, also, invest in some goddamn swim caps. If you think you can shave my head, or anyone else's, for your dunk tank, then you're going to get hit."
That night, Steve finally tells him what happened. What Dr Owens and he had planned. Steve only told Dr Owens about the Fourth of July, wanted to only change the last possible moment for worry of alerting Vecna to what was happening, worried about Vecna changing the plan if he knew.
He talks about Billy being possessed, how Will was, too, once. Dr Owens thinks they've managed to do that for Billy, but just to be safe, they're taking Billy somewhere. Steve didn't ask, but they're telling his dad that he got a scholarship to some college or other, full ride kind of thing. Max knows the truth, but she also knows he's alive. And knowing he's alive means Max isn't going to pull away from her friends.
Steve says he hopes that means Max is saved.
Eddie learns that Steve and Robin are going to become insufferable best friends, so Eddie had better make peace with that now.
Ha takes it all in, listens as Steve tries to downplay what he went through with humor. Like it was easier to endure just because he knew it was coming this time. It does end with Steve crying, just repeating they lived, this time, no one died, they're fine. And Eddie's smart to enough to know Steve isn't meaning all the people who did become a giant flesh monster; he's talking about they people he cares about. Hopper, who apparently died-but-didn't-die, and Billy.
He learns that last time El lost her powers, probably due to losing Hopper. But she didn't lose Hopper, or even have to fight the giant flesh monster. With the plans Dr Owens made, they'd already stormed and cleared the Russian base below Hawkins. It wasn't Dustin and Erica who freed Robin and Steve from their restraints, but some US military men. They'd waited until the Mind Flayer attacked the mall, dropped down inside it before torching it. They still needed the mall to burn down - there was a Russian base below it, after all.
Once Steve is finished, Eddie kisses his forehead and maneuvers them down in bed so he can spoon him. Steve melts into his touch, pulling Eddie's arms more firmly around him. Steve likes to be the little spoon, Eddie's happy to learn.
"I'm going to come out to everyone. Before we leave," Steve says, long after Eddie thought he's already fallen asleep. "You don't have to. We don't have to tell them we're together, but I want them to know."
The thought terrifies Eddie. He's been beaten up for the assumptions, it's hard to him to imagine what might happen if that words are made true by speaking them out loud. "Can I think on that?"
"Of course."
-
July 15th, 1985
Eddie does think about it. He thinks about coming out to this little family they've cultivated and it's hard. Coming out to Wayne had been rough, and he was one person! And he'd told Jeff. But Gareth and Brian had just kinda... put the pieces together and told Eddie they didn't care who he liked so long as he never picked his boytoy over Hellfire night (and so far, Eddie hasn't!). Eddie can't imagine telling up to fourteen people all at once.
Fourteen separate people who could hate him.
But Steve seems so sure they won't. That he won't lose anyone when(if) he comes out to them. And fuck, the scariest part if that he kind of wants to. If he and Steve do this together, if they know they're together, he could hold his hand when they're all together. Sit as close as he wants to without the fear of being found out because they'd already know.
But if they aren't okay with it. Or they aren't okay with Eddie.
These people, this group, was Steve's first, so they might be willing to forgive Steve for his temporary lapse in judgment, but Eddie hadn't done anything to earn their trust. Respect. Willingness to not beat him to death for being gay.
And also, a tiny part of him is afraid of losing Steve if he can't commit to coming out.
"Steve," Eddie whispers as they sit on the couch, a movie playing but Eddie's not watching. "I'm scared."
"What?" Steve sounds so confused, and he quickly looks between Eddie and the movie. It's so enduring that Eddie must laugh about it, just a little.
"Not of Footloose. Of telling people. About us."
Steve's face softens and he looks so fond that Eddie aches. "That's okay, Eddie. You don't have to."
"But what if...."
"If?" Steve prompts.
"What if I'm never ready to come out? What if I- if we can't- What does it mean for us, if I never get there?"
"Oh," Steve says, like the thought that Eddie would never come out hadn't ever occurred to him. "Well, then I'll just be the bisexual who never dates again and lives with his best guy friend for the rest of his life."
That's like a gut punch in the best way. That Steve says it so easily, like he plans to stay with Eddie until he dies. Eddie can't fathom that. "Careful, Stevie. With words like that I might get ideas about you."
Steve looks serious now, but with a little upturn to his mouth. A small, secret smile. "Ideas, hmm. What sort?"
"That you might adore me."
"Well, I do adore you," Steve says simply, easily, "I love you, Eddie."
Eddie freezes because that's not- Steve couldn't possibly mean- that's. What. Eddie and he haven't even said the word boyfriend to each other yet and Steve's... Steve is looking at him with such fondness, adoration, love. Butterflies erupt in Eddie's stomach and as quickly as that little bit of dread had filled him, it's gone even faster. Eddie flings himself into Steve's lap, the need to kiss him until both of them are light headed is the only thing left inside Eddie.
Eddie doesn't say it back, can't really, but Steve must know because he keeps repeating it, with every breath Eddie allows him to take in between kisses.
The next morning, Steve wants to comes out to his found family at their Good Luck Project NINA BBQ, because Hopper, El, Steve, and he are going to be heading to Indianapolis that evening to be picked up by Dr Owens men tomorrow morning and everyone wanted a last get together.
Steve is fearless. Steve is fearless, and so strong, and he loves Eddie.
So, when he calls attention to everyone and starts the speech he rehearsed with Eddie, Eddie steps up. Slides his hand into Steve's, gripping it probably to the point of pain, but there. It doesn't matter how they'll react, because Steve loves him. And he loves Steve.
(And if he clocks Lucas and Max exchanging money about it, well, he can't even be mad about that.)
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stevesbipanic · 2 years ago
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Steve hadn't even remembered the letter.
After everything had happened, after Steve had to leave Eddie's body, had to sit at the bedside of a girl that might not wake up, had to bury an empty box and hold his kids as they were told they were losing Max all over again, the letter was furthest from his mind.
Max's body was too damaged, her mind too post despite El's best efforts. The weight of responsibility and the energy it took every time El tried to bring Max back was killing El too. After the fifth time Max had coded, Hopper had to tell her to not being her back again if it happened.
Three months after they buried Eddie, they buried Max too. The ghost of her was felt in everything they did. When Suzie visited Hawkins for the first time, Max was missed in the party's introductions. When Lucas became captain of the basketball team in junior year, Max was missed in their group hug. When they party graduated, Max was missed in the chair left empty between Darcy Lunce and Paul Meston.
As the kids left one by one to college, following the footsteps of Nancy and Robin years before, Max was missing from their goodbyes.
Steve hadn't been able to leave until he knew the kids were safe and grownup and out of Hawkins. He'd thought about leaving with Robin when she first left, he'd had a panic attack when he started packing. Now the kids were gone he could leave too, the protector could finally rest.
He was moving to Chicago, Nancy and Robin already had his room ready for him. They had understood why he'd had to stay. Most of his items were packed up and loaded into a moving van that the girls had driven back to their apartment. All the was left was Steve's car. He was selling it, he didn't need it in the city and some extra cash would tie him over while he looked for a new job.
He was cleaning it out ready for the buyer when he found it. Dropped between his chair and the gearbox. Perfectly preserved from the day Max handed it to him. At the time he refused to believe he'd ever need to read it, refused to believe he'd lose one of the kids before dying himself first. Yet here he was, alive, and the author of the note was gone.
He tucked the letter into his jacket and finished with the car. Once it had been picked up he still had an hour before the taxi came to take him to the airport. He made his way to the cemetery, it was only fair he say a proper goodbye to her before leaving her to watch over their town. When he arrived at the plot he took a moment to admire the bright flowers the kids had planted years ago, the beautiful mural Will had painted on the back of the headstone.
Here lies Maxine "Mad Max" Mayfield
1972-1986
He took a deep breath and sat down facing her grave, eerily mirroring the girl years before. He took out the letter, carefully opening it and began to read.
Dear Steve,
First off yes of course I'm going to write you a letter, I don't want to hear any self deprecating nonsense when I hand this to you, you're my brother as much as Dustin is and as much as Billy was. People care about you and love you and shut up yes they do.
Second of all if I somehow don't die you better have burned this I don't want you having anything soft and gooey to hold over me if I'm still kicking. If I find out you've still got this I get to drive your car ok?
I should really get to the point of this letter, I'm writing yours while putting off Lucas', I don't know what I'm going to say to him yet, I wish I could ask you to help me but I need to write these myself, he deserves that and so do you. These might be my last words to you and I need you to know a few things and you've got to believe them because if you're reading them it means I'm gone and you have to honour the dead asshole.
It's not your fault.
Listen to me Steve, if this is the last thing I do, if tomorrow everything goes wrong and I can't be berating you for getting hit in the head and you're crying somewhere alone I need you to know it's not your fault.
If I'm dead, if any of us are dead, it's not your fault. We're old enough to make our own choices. If I'm lucky in a couple years I'll be the age you fought a demogorgan for the first time. If I'm dead it's because whatever is down there took me but that's not on you. If I've made myself bait, or run off or done something stupid or brave or sacrificial or we just got unlucky, it's not your fault Steve.
It's not your fault.
If I hear you thinking it's your fault I'm coming back to haunt you.
Love, Max (your favourite)
Steve has to catch a later flight, he doesn't cry until later. Max's words rattle through his brain, years of guilt that he had pushed down slowly bubbled to the surface until he was in Chicago and could sob in his best friend's arms. Whenever he needed to he would reread Max's letter just to remind himself.
It's not your fault.
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grandwretch · 2 years ago
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ok let me talk about the steddie sentinel au I wanna write bc like. its all I can fucking think about yk
alright so. I want it to be closer to show canon bc the shows origins have really been like. lost in the fanfic trope of it all which is cool and all but i think that making it show canon could be so delicious.
and like its set a decade before the show right so it would be like. blair's research into sentinels and guides would have never been published, so it's a great way to have something weird and terrifying happen to steve and NO ONE ELSE IN PUBLISHED HISTORY has been through it before so its really up to the Party to figure it out.
so I'm thinking that Steve comes "online" while in the Upside Down. because that's the most stress he's ever been in AND I think its what his instincts would see most as a survival/tribal situation like. he has three people he has to protect and he's literally in a blighted hell dimension and also if he doesn't take care of everyone, Max will die and, oh yeah, he has no proof that Jonathan, El, Will, and Mike aren't already dead.
He chalks the random oversensitivity to stress and wounds. Its not until he's in his hospital room that he realizes he can hear Eddie's heartbeat from across the hall. He yanks the IV out of his arm and goes to find Dustin.
After that, I think there's like a huge squabble about Steve's "powers" and whether or not they're real and what they mean. Steve doesn't think of them as powers, he doesn't think they compare to El at all and they're functionally useless. "I can't SMELL a demogorgon to death, Dustin." Robin freaks out and wonders if Steve is a vessel like Will now, but they all dismiss it because Will got weaker, not faster and stronger. Eddie practically climbs inside Steve's mouth looking for fangs.
El quietly asks if Steve is from a lab, too. Steve says his dad is pretty awful, but he's not an evil mad scientist sponsored by the government or whatever.
So they undergo a series of stress tests, trying to find the outer limits of what Steve can do. Hopper gets surprisingly into the whole thing, sending Steve through drills and training that he picked up in the military. Steve's Sentinel powers come to him much more smoothly than Jim, simply because he has a much more structured regimen, and less near death experiences while he gets used to his new senses.
Steve fucking hates it. He hates feeling like a science experiment, and he hates running stupid obstacle courses and letting El throw things at him to test his reaction time. He hates how his entire stupid life has become about this... thing that's happened to him, thats not even that useful, because its not like he's stronger. He's just a better fighter for a human, which isn't going to do much against Vecna.
Even worse, he had to quit his job, because turning all his senses up to 11 has made retail impossible. The blend of perfumes and body odor gives him headaches, he can't stand being able to hear every fucking conversation in the store, and the fluorescent lights hurt his eyes.
Throughout it all, the Munson's trailer is kind of a refuge. After Eddie finally accepted that Steve wasn't some kind of sexy vampire here to seduce their souls away, he dismissed whatever was happening to Steve as boring. So Steve feels like a fucking human again with Eddie, and-- Okay, Eddie is loud and grating and always smells like weed, but those things were already annoying before Steve was like this. He's used to tuning it out, so its almost comforting to be surrounded by them.
Besides, everything the Munsons own is well worn and soft, not like the textures of his own home, more pleasing to the eye than the skin. And if Steve asks very nicely, Eddie will play his acoustic; sweet, soft melodies that don't hurt Steve's ears like the radio does.
(Unbeknownst to Steve, Eddie learns all his favorite songs in a flurry of tapes. He replaces all the soap and detergent in the house with the fancy kind meant for people with allergies. He spends so much money Steve-proofing his place, but he never complains once. He never wants Steve to leave again.)
But the Munson trailer can't stop the worst of it, which is Steve's unbearable need to protect. He already had a superhero complex, but now its even worse. If he goes too long without doing something active, there's an itch under his skin that he can't shake. So he has to venture out again, back to Hoppers' canon for more stupid tests, or patrolling around the town until even his improved stamina falters.
Thats how he zones, the first time. He's roaming through the streets when he hears Dustin and Lucas up in Dustin's room, laughing at some movie. He focuses on the sound of their laughter for a little too long, and suddenly thats all he can hear. Thats all he can feel at all, actually, just their voices. It consumes him.
They find him like that when Lucas goes to leave, hours later. Standing in the Henderson's yard, bat in hand, unmoving. They call everyone, but Eddie gets there first, driving like the devil is after him. He freaks out, understandably, but Dustin calms him with the facts that Steve's eyes haven't rolled, and he's been gone for who knows how long without floating, so its probably not Vecna.
Eddie doesn't feel better.
They try every song on every tape Steve owns. He flinches at a few louder ones, but nothing works. Eventually, Hopper and Jonathan manage to get Steve into a car, his body unresponsive in their hands.
Robin wants to take him to the hospital, but Nancy tells her, softly, that it might alert the wrong people to Steve's condition. What wouldn't the American military do for a body with improved reflexes and speed, who can see and avoid a speeding bullet, and hear the heartbeats of his enemies? They take him to the trailer, because Eddie insists that he and Wayne will be able to take care of Steve. They know what he likes, what triggers him, better than people who do it on purpose.
The worry makes Eddie maybe a little meaner than he means to be.
When they get him home, Eddie wraps Steve up in all his favorite blankets, ones that smell like them both and Wayne's favorite cigarettes. He kisses Steve's forehead and sits next to him on the bed, playing his acoustic and singing all Steve's favorite songs. He knows they didn't work before, but he doesn't know what else to do, and if he just has to watch Steve lay there, he'll cry.
Its the first time, and he's been stuck so long it takes him forever to find his way out, but eventually Steve surfaces. His eyes blink into focus and he swallows around a dry throat.
Steve looks at Eddie, the man who Guided him out of the deep, dark well of his own mind.
"What'd I miss?"
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fandoms-in-law · 8 months ago
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Keep the Pool
Summary: Nancy has trauma over Steve's pool and pool parties. That causes issues when everyone knows he's a naiad and needs it to live but she keeps on thinking it should go.
Warnings: suicide/ death mentions galore, arguments, nancy bashing, naiad Steve
Authors Note: I woke up with the first line of this in my head and it spiralled from there. Being honest here, I don't like Nancy. She's cool but doesn't deal, or really admit her feelings enough to properly deal with them so yeah, I definitely see this happening if she had to face Steve's home or his pool again
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“I don't know how you can still swim in there.” Nancy grumbled.
It'd been a month since Vecna was killed and everyone's injuries were finally healed enough for Steve to host a pool party without half of them having to stay on the side. He frowned at Nancy as she eyed the pool with distrust. “Because it's my home.” He stated simply, floating in the water where he'd been checking it was clean, with no unnoticed debris in it.
She'd interrogated him alongside Dustin after he managed to pull them all back to his pool. She knew, probably better than the others, that he was a naiad and forever bound to the fountain he chose as home. Except Nancy had also been making comments and doing everything she could to tell Steve his home needed destroying, filling in, emptying, as if that wouldn't kill him to do.
“Your home killed Barb.” She countered as if that first instance of the Upside-Down was the only one that mattered, even now.
“And saved all of us, but especially Eddie's life.” He replied steadily, refusing to accept that blame again. Robin had gone through that night with him a lot after all Nancy's accusations from that Halloween came out after a nightmare when she was staying over.
She didn't reply, glaring at the water again and flouncing off to the kitchen.
Steve thought about following her. She had been the first to arrive and a good host probably would ensure his guests had drinks and snacks, but he knew Nancy, following would just be inviting another lecture on killing himself without those words spoken.
Before he could get out to wait for other people to greet Eddie, Dustin and Max were there, claiming loungers and placing bags beside the house. “Why's Nance look so furious?” Eddie called over, looking back into the house.
“She thinks I should've filled the pool with cement or something after Barbara went missing.” Steve explained, pulling himself out of the water. It was nice to be able to do so around others without having to conjure a glamour for the few moments it took his body to agree the slight changes for the water were no longer needed. When swimming nobody questioned it, but once he was out Steve had quickly learnt to glamour when the swimming team kept frowning as if he was weird, but since the Party all knew he was a naiad now he felt no need to do so.
Eddie froze, staring at him in hurt astonishment at the words, while both kids let out angry noises. “She knows you can't do that, right?” he asked.
“She knows!” Dustin snapped, “She asked more questions than I did over how this all works. If she's still saying that then Nancy is being either obtuse or heartless.”
“Does she seriously want you dead? I mean, Mike can be thoughtless but what the hell!” Max exclaimed, not noticing said boy coming through the house behind her, nor Joyce and Hopper following, having heard some of what was said and looking concerned.
Hopper took in the angry expressions of Eddie, Dustin and Max, as well as how nonplussed Steve seemed, and asked, “So what's Wheeler said now?”
“Nancy, not Mike, seems to think this pool is to blame for Barb's death and keeps trying to insist I fill it in or empty it, even after everything about Naiads has been explained to her.” Steve repeated. “They're mad because they realise she's basically told me to kill myself repeatedly and is angry that I refuse to.”
“Glad you've got that straight, Kid. Joyce, I think I'll probably mess up that talk if I try to have it with Nancy.” He nodded,
As Joyce turned to go inside, clearly planning to have the conversation while things were fresh they heard Robin yell, “You want Steve to Die? Seriously? Think about what the fuck you're saying or get the fuck out of here and away from me!”
As everyone hurried in they could see Nancy clearly stumbling through a denial Robin wasn't allowing. “No. You said you want the pool emptied and filled in, that means Steve is dead. There are no two ways about this. The pool stays because it is Steve's home and he survives with the connection to it. You don't get to moan about trauma and difficulties while saying the only fucking solution is to kill my best friend!” She cut off, gesturing out towards the pool. “Trauma is not dealt with by avoiding it, nor by destroying the thing you connect to the trauma. What you're doing is repeating that you want Steve Harrington dead! I know you've said this to him before so don't fucking deny that either.”
“Robbie,” Steve called softly, shuffling through the people blocking the door. “Robbie, I'm not going anywhere. You know that.” He soothed, already braced when she threw herself into his arms.
“This isn't how you deal with trauma Nancy.” Mike said, agreeing with Robin's words and getting the attention off the best friends clinging to each other. “Or did you think Joyce, Will and Jonathon should have moved house as soon as Will was rescued? That house was where he was taken from.”
Nancy shook in place, staring frantically around at everyone as if looking for someone to agree, even with what she was insisting on had had its consequences plainly spelt out. “It killed Barb.” She stuttered out.
“No.” Will moved forwards now. “The upside-down did that, the demogorgon or whatever monster she encountered in the place. The pool didn't kill anyone.”
Steve looked at everyone frowning or glaring at Nancy and released Robin to step forwards. “This is important to make clear, but ganging up on Nancy isn't going to help right now. Avoidance worked for Nancy. I wasn't inviting anyone over and the kids or Robin have been the only ones to ask to come round so she's been fine until now. The issue here is she's trying to make me let her keep avoiding it, ignoring just what she's basically trying to make a condition of her coming to my house. You understand that's unfair and irrational, don't you, Nancy?” He said, first looking around at everyone, before focusing on her.
“But you – you weren't born here so you can just chose to move.” She tried to protest now meeting his eyes.
Dustin cleared his throat to argue, but remained silent when Steve held up his hand.
“You asked that question when I let you and Dustin interrogate me over being a naiad. You know that I can't and that what you've been asking is essentially saying I should kill myself. This bargaining is harmful, to you and to all of our trust in you.” He explained calmly, pretending not to have winced at the words.
Jonathan appeared beside him, nodding in support. “We got through healing from that first instance of the Upside-Down by making new memories in our home, happier ones. We worked through what we could talking to each other. It's not a case of fighting things we've gone through forever more but accepting them, talking through the reactions we have because of it and building new memories.”
“Like me, getting Steve to help me practice swimming here after I learnt how my friend died. Or have you forgotten that before Barb befriended you and you decided only she could come around that I was her friend and trying to be yours?” Robin nodded.
Nancy blinked at them again, fidgeting in place. “I need to think.”
“Yes, you do. But maybe you'll start feeling calmer around the pool if you sit inside but in view of it for a while today.” Joyce offered. “No need to come out and I'm sure some of us can keep you company throughout the evening, but it could be a start.”
She nodded, “Okay.”
Mike threw off his top then. “You do that. I'm going to go swim in the Naiad's fountain.” He huffed, hurrying through and getting the other kids rushing after him with calls for races or jokes about making that a DnD location.
“I'll stay. I'm sure you want to keep an eye on the kids.” Jonathan nodded to Steve, waving out to the pool.
“Thanks.”
With that everyone settled into the pool party, relaxing and letting the drama of its beginning fade.
As Hopper tried to convince the kids to end the evening for lifts home, he paused to pat Steve's shoulder, “We're keeping that pool and you for as long as we can. You keep remembering that we want you around.”
“I will Hop.” He grinned, “Even when these brats drive me insane.”
Since Eddie and Robin were insisting on staying over, the last to leave was Nancy. Just before going she shuffled out onto poolside, and hesitantly reached down to touch the surface of the pool, shoulders hunched in as if trying to remain unseen.
The remaining trio watched her quietly, Steve leaning on the edge of the pool with his legs kicking behind him while Eddie and Robin sat either side of him with just their feet in the water. “You okay?” Steve called softly.
“Yeah.” Nancy sighed, sounding uncertain of her words. “Yeah, I think – I think I could get calmer over your pool. Sorry for well, everything. I was just acting out of panic about coming faced to this again but shouldn't have said any of that. The party loves you and even after everything you're a good friend to me. Sorry about suggesting you should die for my trauma.”
“Honestly, wouldn't that just traumatise you more?” Steve suggested, a half smile being directed at her.
Nancy stared before laughing softly. “Probably yeah. Me and everyone else in our group would probably do everything we could to avoid Loch Nora forever more, I bet.”
“Good thing I'm keeping the pool, yeah?”
“Yeah.” She nodded, looking over her shoulder. “Have a good evening.”
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mooifyourecows · 2 years ago
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Started the 4th season of Stranger Things, gonna post my thoughts as I finish episodes so like, potential spoiler alert
okay so episode one
The entire Jonathan/Nancy scene made me so angry lmao STOP WASTING MY TIME WITH THIS GARBAGE
The whole tone is different?? Like the previous seasons had that kinda tropey jokey feeling from time to time but it took itself a little more seriously, especially season 1. But this one is like... wacky silly camera angles and sweeping swinging shots between scenes and goofy wacky prop comedy hehe finishing each other's sentences even though they're not together or talking about the same thing uhhhhhh it's just very silly
Not that that is BAD... just different
I like Eddie so far though. I thought he was gonna be a little Too Much™️ but by the end of the episode I decided that yes I like him. I can already see there being a point later on when his whole "theres no shame in running away" line is gonna either come in clutch or come back to bite him or someone else in the ass. Im gonna make a prediction that there's gonna be a scene where there's an option to run or fight and he's gonna stay and fight and then either save the day or die valiantly. Bonus points if throughout the show he constantly says to run away or chooses to run away until finally he's like "no, not this time" and then bam dead
I'm not mad at the whole "Lucas wants to be popular while the rest are content with being freaks" drama. Like I know it's kinda overdone but this show has always played into the popular tropes to create some tension between the characters so I don't think it's too weird
Eleven's drama is fine too. Being the new kid and getting bullied and also grappling with grief of losing her parent, I get it. She's acting kinda pitiful though? Like, she's always been really straightforward and strong and unyielding and now she's kinda just... rolling over? I understand she's in an entirely new environment and dealing with grief and loss of her abilities but still....
Pretty sure the skull monster thing is Papa. Maybe. Idk like it's weird that they're showing it so immediately in the first episode and it's just... preying on people's trauma, I'm guessing? Strange. But not Stranger Things Strange.
Idk so far I'm wondering how it's going to connect to the past seasons. Right now it feels like I'm watching a whole different show.
God I just hope there's less Nancy and Jonathan. Or their entire fucking plot lines aren't completely about their stupid fucking terrible romance. They have no chemistry and I despise their whole shtick. They'd be so much better characters if their stories were based more around being a big brother/sister to Will and Mike
Honestly idc about any of the romances other than Joyce and Hopper. Unless Steve and Eddie fuck because I'd be amenable to that. I might care about Robyn and Vickie but haven't seen enough of Vickie yet so who knows, they might wind up as boring as Jonathan and Nancy (or any of the kids' romances which I also don't care about even though they're not really terrible or whatever)
Erica is perfect as always though. I reeeeeeally liked the scene where that chick is singing the national anthem and Erica and the boys are slow motion walking to their dnd game. With the American flag cape? You can't spell America without Erica!
No further comments. Will watch another episode tomorrow
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kurokoros · 2 years ago
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As we are talking about Steve's character rn, I completely agree with anything you said so far. To add to the whole s3/s4 treatment, I just hate the whole "babygirlyfication" by the fandom because of how s3/s4 was written. Like if I hear the word babygirl one more time. I think what annoys me the most about it is that in Steve's case, babygirl=stupid himbo loser, and ughh, I just hate it so much. Yes he wore that dumb sailor outfit but he hated it every second he had to be in it, but the fandom overlooks that completely and decided yeah Steve loves to dress feminine and all (mostly to pair him up with other characters like Eddie and to subject him into weird ship dynamics where he's like the submissive partner). I swear, ever since s3 people think Steve is so helpless in everything, they also act like he's a super virgin who just can't get anyone, which contradicts s1/s2 Steve. I mean, okay, he could have had a funk in s3 bc of Nancy, but the show over exaggerated it to a point it was so ooc. I think the scene I hated the most in s3 is his last one, where he needed Robin to get him the job at FV because apparently he hadn't seen any movie prior to this day (despite being a huge Tom Cruise fan). It's so annoying really because they simplified him so much. He could be such a great character with depth, but nope. And the fandom perpetuates this by making him the dumb babygirl his entire personality. You're literally one of the few people trying to pick up after s2 and develop him in a way that makes more sense than what the show did.
Other characters the show did dirty after s2 are Hopper (bc what was up with him in s3 like it was actually scary), Joyce, Mike, Jonathan (well actually he got fucked over by being Nancy's accessory since s2) and partially Dustin esp in s4. The writers needed a department that overlooks character contingency because those are not the same ones we watched in s1/s2. I love Stranger Things, I do, but my god, the wasted character potential sometimes keeps me up at night. I'm not a talented writer, I try my best, but even I would have come up with better storylines or at least make sure they stay the same characters.
The whole "babygirl Steve" thing makes me want to eat glass. Like, I get mad when I think about how they went the himbo route with Steve instead of continuing the "jerk with a heart of gold" characterization they had going for two seasons, and to see the fandom just constantly make "babygirl Steve!" jokes irritates the hell out of me. I don't want to be that bitch who says you aren't allowed to headcanon characters certain ways, or you aren't allowed to project on characters, but damn some of the Steve stans genuinely make me question whether or not they actually like him in the first place. Like... Steve is a masculine guy! But people saw that he has a haircare routine and cares about hygiene and decided that makes him feminine to fit a queer stereotype so they can ship him with the two most mediocre white boys the show could offer.
And it really is super fucking weird that S3 "babygirl" Steve is portrayed as less intelligent and more pathetic than he was in S1/2. It's infantilizing. And the sailor suit makes it worse. If I could change one thing about ST I would get rid of that stupid fucking sailor suit. The show really did just make Steve seem pathetic in S3, and it was done in a way that I just don't understand why anyone who actually likes Steve would enjoy what they did.
Along with the "Steve can't get a job on his own" (which doesn't make sense if he was apparently a trained lifeguard. this man would have actual references aside from his mother if that was the case) thing, I have a bone to pick with the recurring gag of "Steve doesn't get pop culture references". Like??? Steve was a popular kid in school??? He would know movies (if only because movies are a super common date activity and there's a theater in Hawkins).
I refuse to acknowledge S3-4 as canon in any of my fics because of how much I despise the way canon botched most of the characters. There was so much potential there, and instead they just made Steve a loser with no charm. The Duffers for sure need someone in charge of characters. And plot. And worldbuilding. And overall consistency.
Basically, the Duffers need to hire actually good writers and just stick to directing.
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kedreeva · 2 years ago
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Apologies if it's a dumb question, english is not my mother tongue so it might be that but could you explain what you mean with Eddie's inability to let others get actually close? I feel Eddie is so easy with getting close to people and opening up, so wouldn't the description fit better for Jonathan? 🙈
Nope! And it's okay, I think it's great to ask questions. I'm going to start from the end, with Jonathan, because that'll hopefully make it easier to understand Eddie.
First, to clarify the language- when I say close, I don't mean physically and I don't mean "has a problem making friends." I mean close as in letting anyone know who he really is, rather than whatever mask he's wearing for them.
Jonathan is different because Jonathan stays away from people, because Jonathan cannot for the life of him keep people from getting in if he likes them at all. The other difference being that Jonathan doesn't LIKE people, but once he does, he has pretty much no ability to keep his mouth shut around them, if they show any sign of listening and sometimes even when they don't. I mean, look at him!
Jonathan is constantly talking to Will about their feelings, trying to get Will to acknowledge it's okay to feel stuff and feel a LOT of stuff, even if that stuff doesn't match what society says he should feel in seasons 1 and 2. He's literally the ONLY ONE who even notices Will's distress in season 4 and pegs it for what it actually is and the hot second he gets a chance he's there going "you have to know I love you so much no matter what and I will always be there for you" etc.
Nancy shows him one (1) second of empathy and he's pouring his lil heart out to her about how he takes pictures because he would rather observe people than talk to them because they don't say what they're really thinking (he wants to know what they're really thinking, who they really are, he wants to be real with people when they get close enough to talk to) and then they're out in the woods with guns and he's telling her about his 10yo trauma of killing a rabbit and crying for a week and lamenting the state of his parents' love collapse. S4 Nancy tells Fred Jonathan is "caring and compassionate" and "he's so protective over the people that he loves."
Murray talks shit at them and Jonathan literally cannot stand someone close to him having the wrong idea about him (even if it's right) so he gets up to go talk to Nancy about it. His hesitation to do so earlier has nothing to do with not wanting to be closer to Nancy, and everything to do with respecting how she feels about Steve- because it's not until Murray points out "we like steve, but we don't LOVE Steve" and Jonathan hears/sees her reaction that he thinks oh shit?? is that true??
He's known Argyle for ~8 months or so (july-march?) and Argyle treats him like Jonathan being quiet during workshop is him moping, tries to get him to talk as if talking is the norm for them. It's clear Jonathan has talked to Argyle about his future plans with Nancy (the ones he is having a hard time with), and he admits a little while later that he's self-sabotaging.
Even with the people he doesn't like? He lets them get too close in the bad way. He lets Steve get under his skin to the point of violence. When he goes to yell at his dad in season 1, you can see how much he's struggling not to let this absolute asshole get close. He can't stand his dad, but how much he cares about it is scrawled all over his face, with how mad he is- and it's not all anger, it's hurt, too. This is a guy Jonathan thinks SHOULD be close, but given what Jonathan tells Will about their dad in flashbacks, it's pretty clear Jonathan let their dad close and got burned, and he's trying to protect Will from the same. There's a moment at the end of Season 1 that just absolutely breaks my heart, when they're all at the school getting the pool ready and Jonathan is freaking out while he and Hopper are getting salt and Hopper grabs at him and looks him in the eyes and tells him he's GOING to take care of all this and GOD you can just SEE how desperate Jonathan's been for a halfway decent father figure, you see him go through all 5 stages of grief in an instant as he accepts Hopper's assurance.
Jonathan's problem isn't letting people get close, it's that people getting close is a problem lol When people show an interest in getting close to him and he actually likes them, he just opens like a fuckin' book. No wonder, being raised by Joyce and helping raise Will. Like. Jonathan is about the sharing and caring! Yes he was (is) a weird kid but he's also desperate for people to be close to. He doesn't have a hard time letting people get close, he has a hard time finding anyone that he thinks is worth knowing at all on any level.
Eddie, on the other hand, loves people. Loves attention. Loves being loud, loves being looked at. But people actually getting to know him for who he really is? Nah. Nope. He's got a dozen masks on hand at any given moment. Brash loudmouth climbing on a table yelling at the jocks with his finger horns on his head. Cocky triple senior spitting in the system's eye. Dramatic DM. Impatient but chill drug dealer in the woods. Jester at the picnic table, hopping around for a smile. "I run away" he says of himself, "so Mordor it is," two concepts diametrically opposed. "You won't believe me," he tells them in the boathouse, not sure he can tell them the truth. "These cynical eyes" he says with the taste of "true love" still on his tongue as he tries to play matchmaker. They're all him in different ways, but just pieces. Tidbits. Enough to ensure he isn't alone. Not enough to be known. Not enough to let anyone close enough to get to him, not enough to let himself be hurt.
Because, as I talked about before, look at what happens to him (to both of them really) when the chips are down.
When Will is missing? Jonathan knows he has at least some people, and seeks out more. Jonathan connects to his mom. Connects to Nancy. Even starts connecting to Hopper when they get to the same place. Shit starts going to hell and they need out from under the FBI or whatever at Jon's house in Cali? He calls Argyle, who literally then helps them hide a body. Like when shit hits the fan, Jonathan's gonna get shit done, and he's gonna grab up the people he's got, pull them closer to get through it, and he's so close with them they will literally help him hide bodies and hide from the FBI without knowing what the hell is even happening.
When Chrissy dies? Eddie isolates himself and even when people come to help him he struggles to let them close enough to let them help on any level. He supposedly has lots of friends despite being a "freak" but... he doesn't go to his bandmates. He doesn't go to anyone in hellfire. Hell, he doesn't even go to his uncle, who presumably cares about him more than anyone else. His bandmates don't even skip practice or anything to try to find him. His uncle, despite telling Nancy that killing isn't in Eddie's nature, despite that it's clear he cares about Eddie, is just like. Chilling at home talking to cops. To be clear, I love Wayne and I think he loves Eddie so much, but his reaction tells me Eddie hasn't let him close.
Which means the ONLY one to go looking for Eddie (for good reasons) is Dustin (yes Max comes to Dustin to ask if they even should, but it's Dustin who goes YES??? and then drags everyone else in), who would (and DID) literally form a bond with a bloodthirsty monster given 3 seconds of time together, and even Dustin doesn't know enough about him to guess where he is, even though he apparently knows a ton of names of people who are supposed to be Eddie's friends and none of THEM know where Eddie is either... in fact the closest anyone can tell him is maybe he's at his supplier's house. Are they even friends? Unclear.
I'm editing to add: Jason and company ALSO make a list of where he might be hiding, public places (where he obviously won't be but they gotta check just in case? because they don't know him) and his friends. Which means he's loudly friends enough with a bunch of people that even people who only know him by reputation know it, but... also they still have to make a long list. and go through it by hand. and drive around. because the guesses of his enemies are as good as the guesses of his closest friends. The only reason Dustin gets there first is that Eddie's friends will talk to him easily on the phone whereas if they're friends with Eddie they probably aren't the sort to talk to Jason willingly. That's it. That's luck.
All of that, Eddie's own reaction and the reactions of the people around him, the fact that his friends can barely find him faster than his enemies, says so much about Eddie's level of actual connection to others; even the ones that desperately do want to care about him don't know him well enough to find him. The only reason Dustin does is because he's a determined little shit just a little more stubborn than anyone else.
Eddie's easy to befriend, but he's not easy to get close to. Jonathan is hard to befriend, but he's easy to get close to. Y'know?
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truessences · 2 years ago
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My Opinions on the Stranger Things Ships
No one asked me of course but we all share opinions that no one asked for lol. So I'll be sharing my quick thoughts on ships that I see people mention. Everyone's opinions are valid I just may not agree and you don't have to agree with me. I said what I said and I will not be arguing about it.
I'm not going to be rude to anyone and if you are rude while sharing your opinions, I will block you. Simple.
This isn't in any particular order except going from adults-teens-main party.
Adults
Jopper (Joyce and Hopper) - They're fine lol. I like them. In the first season, I don't think I thought much about it. It wasn't really until maybe season 3 but I thought Hopper was being really yelly and mean. But her thinking he died and then their reunion in S4 was really sweet. Them kissing and all that, I was like yeah, I think this is a natural progression.
Older Teens
Stancy (Steve and Nancy)- I thought they were okay early on except for when he got mad without talking to her and letting his friends slut shame her publicly. But I think them breaking up was a natural progression because Nancy and Jonathan had chemistry and it seemed like they were gonna lead into that anyway. In S4, they're really trying to push on us that they might be thinking of each other, Steve particularly, especially since Eddie was like blatantly telling him that that's true love lol. I don't think they need to get back together.
Jancy (Jonathan and Nancy)- I like them fine. What he did in S1 was creepy and personally I can't say I'd even talk to him after that. But they did kind of trauma bond so sure I guess. I don't mind them. But at this point, if they break up, Nancy needs to just go off to college and be bad ass. I know Hawkins is basically split open but whose to say that stuff will happen now or that Vecna will wait while he heals (maybe Eddie can return?? *Cries*). I think there should be a time jump anyway, so if that's the case, Nancy should be single. Maybe she met some other young man while in college.
Vobin? Ribickie? (Robin and Vickie)- I wish we got to see more of them interacting but I want Robin to get her girl lol. Their scene at the end of S4 was cute and I hope that if Vicky/Vickie shows up again that they're together. Maybe not publicly but for each other, together. Or I want Robin to be with someone she loves and loves her.
Ronance/Steddie (Robin and Nancy/Steve and Eddie)- These are fan ships. I personally didn't read them as couples and it's fine if you did. For Robin and Nancy, I liked that they seemed to become friends after that bit of major awkwardness in the beginning. Nancy hasn't had a close girl friend since Barb was murdered (that she still feels guilty about and I even thought that Nancy might be feeling super protective of Robin and Max) and Robin may not have many friends in general. So that's what I was thinking. As for Steve and Eddie, meh lol, I'm not the biggest Steve fan so... I'm indifferent but idk if I think that Eddie would be with Steve if he chose to date a guy. Some of the fan comics are really cute though. The one where Eddie works at the renaissance fair is cute lol.
Hellcheer/Edissy (Eddie and Chrissy)- They were cute and I'm mad we didn't get more of them. Joe and Grace had natural chemistry and that scene in the forest was a masterclass at introducing new characters to fall in love with in 3 minutes. I was unsure about both of them, Eddie more than Chrissy but that scene made me like them both. I was distraught with her death and then with his later (also for other reasons). I feel like if they got to live, they would have became easy friends. Even if it wasn't romantic, which I'm fine with that too, I just wanted them to have more scenes together.
The Main Party.
Byler (Will and Mike)- So I’m not gonna touch on this too much for the sake of arguments. At this point, it's clear that Will has feelings for Mike but there hasn’t been anything to me that shows that Mike knows or feels the same. I think a lot of posts for this ship have been extremely dishonest and manipulative of scenes and situations. I think it’s weird. You don’t need to do that for your ship. You see something that others don’t and that’s fine but I find that the people become the problem with this ship than the ship itself. You don't have to make it seem like Will reacted to Mike telling Eleven that his life started the day he found her in the woods when that screenshot wasn't from that part AND Will disappeared the day before. That's dishonest. Also seems to me that y'all want Mike to say and do the things he does for El for Will but are mad when he does it for El and say that he's lying to her? Wouldn't that be fucked up that he's lying to El, with his acts of service, with his clear emotions because he suddenly decides that he loved Will all this time? That's fucked up to me. That's all.
ElMax (Eleven and Max)- I've only seen this a few times and I think it's cute when people talk about it lol, but I also view this as a friendship. They became friends in S3 and while we don't really know if they contacted each other much during the time between S3 and S4, I think they love for each other is there and I love that in their party of boys, they have each other to lean on. Even if I found Max to be annoying and overbearing in S3.
Dusuzie? (Dustin and Suzie)- We haven't seen them interact in person but I think they're so sweet. The Neverending Story sequence is easily Top 10. I like that Dustin found someone who is just as smart and nerdy as he is but they're both cool in their own right. I hope in S5 that we get to see them actually be together more.
Lumax (Lucas and Max)- I've liked them enough as they grew closer in S2. I thought it was clear pretty early that Max was gonna choose Lucas. While we didn't get to see them be boyfriend and girlfriend that much in S3, what we did see was cute and funny. The first episode was great stuff with them. In S4, we get a more serious and emotional Lumax and while they're not together, you can tell that Lucas still cares for her and that's she's trying not to show she cares. This is shown in Dear Billy and how he doesn't leave her side from then on (sounds familiar hmm *glances at Mileven*). He saved her knowing her favorite song and then to tell her that he also loves Kate Bush now for saving her... top tier boyfriend material. Then in the finale episode, just the way he's trying to protect her but also allow her to try and go through with her plan. Ugh, it's just so good. Caleb and Sadie also have so much chemistry. I watch interviews with them and they just work really well together. I really hope that if Max wakes up in S5 (since they didn't kill her the way I think they just should have), that she and Lucas get to talk and grow together and if it's a time jump like I want, that they'll either be together or still be close. If they officially break up again, I think it'll still be a very good and amicable break up. But otherwise, top tier couple.
Mileven (Mike and Eleven)- I really could go on and on but I'll try not to. They have been our main couple and our main characters since S1. I know Mike has been sidelined a lot and I don't like it but that doesn't negate that he's technically the lead boy on the show. Anyway, they met each other the first time and Mike immediately was taken with her, this is clear when the camera panned from Eleven to the boys and then zoomed in on Mike's face. It was clear to me at least. Love at first sight even if it had to develop over time. Mike goes into caregiver mode and literally does everything he can to keep her safe and make her comfortable. He shows her his toys and everything lol. In S2, this boy called her every day because he was sure she didn't die and it was his plan to lure the demodogs so that Eleven and Hopper could get in to close the gate. Now in S3, he's afraid of losing her, afraid of being apart from her and yeah they totally get too attached at the hip which was something they had to learn (though let's not forget that Hopper threatened him leading to the decisions he makes in the beginning). But he's attentive to her regardless and he's trying to be so protective because while everyone is okay and pushing her to find the Flayed, he's the only one worried about her pushing herself too hard, "I love her and I can't lose her again!" Like come on. He was always the first into action, when Billy attacks Eleven, he goes in with a pipe (while everyone else just stood there), and then later when the Mind Flayer attacked them in the cabin, he was the first one to try and save El when it grabbed her leg. He even ran at Billy when he attacked, Max, Mike and Eleven in the mall. Then one of my fave scenes is the one in the store when he's trying to tell her that he loves her but he's babbling and can't get out (this is a character trait as he did the same thing in S1 and then later in S4 in the pizza place). He reassured Eleven that her powers will come back at some point. Then this boy spends the entire S4 dealing with his own insecurities which we FINALLY get to see him talk about with someone (but ya know he's actually lying and talking about Will)... then we get his confession and regardless if you found it cheesy or not, I felt that shit and so did he and Eleven. At this point, whether or not they last as adults, they are endgame for the show.
But these are just my thoughts on the ships I see people talk about. I'm not gonna argue about them either. I'm too old for that shit lol.
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aliferousdreamer · 2 years ago
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my theories/predictions for volume 2
young el collapses after banishing peter/001/henry to the upside down and goes into a coma because she used too much of her powers (like henry)
young el then loses her powers as well as her memories of everything that happened (aka has had trauma induced amnesia this entire time) and has to learn how to talk and use her powers again
nancy sees henry when he was put in the lab whilst still in vecna's memories (and also sees brenner?!)
robin remembers nancy's tapes and together she and steve get nancy back
joyce and hopper kiss
max puts herself in danger to get more info on vecna (like will spying on the mindflayer)
jason gets vecnad and diessssss
present day el is overwhelmed by the revelation of her "killing" peter/001/henry and her powers come back in an explosive fashion
nina project goes boom
brenner survives because of course he does
mike, will, jonathan and argyle find el after she destroys the lab
emotional reunion between el and mike
sullivan catches up to the remains of the lab and if doctor owens survives el blowing up the lab then he's killed by sullivan
argyle drives the cali group all the way to hawkins in his lil pizza van
vecna is mad at max for escaping him and tries to kill her again in the creel house
vecna also targets lucas because of his guilt with max, patrick and maybe even bringing erica and putting her in danger?!
somehow hopper, joyce and murray make it back to america
argyle runs out of palm tree delight 💔
everyone finally reunites in hawkins
el and hopper have a very emotional reunion and both remark how they both lost their hair
emotional el and max reunion
jancy reunion is kinda awkward and steve will get jealous
we see will's painting with him and mike talking about their relationship
argyle gets high again via mushrooms idk
mike confesses his love/feelings for el(?)
robin has a flirty scene with vickie to set them up for s5
nancy gets vecnad again
will gets vecnad
everyone gets vecnad
nancy, steve, robin and eddie decide to cause a distraction for el in the upside down
eddie plays his electric guitar in the upside down (as seen in the trailer) to mess up the demobats' echolocation and cause a distraction
eddie ultimately dies protecting everyone because we can't have nice things and completes his story arc from running away and thinking he's a "coward" to becoming a hero 💔
will senses the mindflayer and begins to understand what role they're playing in the story with vecna
el has a 1v1 fight with vecna
vecna lives
we get a teaser of the mindflayer right at the end for season 5
we get an "infinity war"/"empire strikes back" type of ending where it ends on a bleaker and more sad/depressing note, with season 5 being like "endgame"/"return of the jedi" with the epic final showdown
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salvatoreren · 2 years ago
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Vol2 Thoughts
Alright everybody welcome back and ill try to make this as clean and constructed as possible anyways
i suppose chapter eight was the calm before the storm despite many people have died already
max having her halloween mask tho lmao what was she going to do with it and those poor people who got their van stolen,
the way i screamed when nancy saw jason, and erica just seeing the rest, im so glad eddie and the others stayed in the van, like please, dude my jaw dropped when i saw some dude kissing vickie, like poor robin, she deserves better
the way all of them had their moments while on the grass making weapons, i love that, i feel erica about lucas lol, robin and steve just comforting each other and being the best and that dustin and eddie scene, i love when they were scuffling, god they're so wholesome, YOUR HONOR I LOVE THEM, THE NEVER CHANGE UGHHH PLEASE IT HITS DIFF NOW
i cried when will was crying, he's been through so much and ik i have set my negative views regarding ships but like i said byler and mileven was cool okay? anyways im sure what he said to mike was his true feelings
ik it's just me but i wish brenner and el had more closure like a max and billy moment but i think like i said a month ago with hopper saying the need to surpass fathers and grow, it made sense actually because in order for el to grow she needs to defy and surpass him
ALSO WILL AND EL HUGGING
now
CHAPTER NINE REALLY WAS SO HEARTSTOPPING, I HAD A HEADACHE WATCHING IT, MY HANDS WERE SO COLD AND MY STOMACH WAS TWISTING AND SHIT, I WAS SO FUCKING SCARED BUT ANYWAYS
THAT BIT WHERE THEY TRY TO FORCE MIKE IN EATING PIZZA WITH PINEAPPLE, THAT WAS SO CUTE
THE LUMAX SCENES! THE HOW PRESUMPTUOUS OF YOU COMING BACK, I LOVE THEM THEY'RE SO CUTE UGHHH
THAT "CHRISSY THIS IS FOR YOU" HAD ME BAWLING AND SCREAMING, UGH I LOVE HIM, THOSE PEEPS WERE RIGHT ABOUT EDDIE PLAYING MASTER OF PUPPETS, HE WAS INSANE FOR THAT, UGH PLS
IM SORRY BUT I LAUGHED SO HARD WHEN DUSTIN AND EDDIE KEPT STABBING THE BATS LOL
THE WAY MY HEART BROKE WHEN EDDIE CUT OFF THE SHEET, DUSTIN SCREAMING, I HATE THIS
MY POOR BOY DUSTIN GETTING HIS LEG HURT
AND PROPS TO MURRAY, I LOVE HIM HE WAS CRAZY SHOOTING THAT FLAMETHROWER, MVP
THE SINCLAIRS BEATING THOSE TWO DOUCHES LMAO WHY WERE THEY ONLY TWO THO, ERICA KICKING HIM RIGHT IN THE NUTS AND HITTING HIM WITH A FLASHLIGHT QUEEN! ALSO LUCAS SAYING NORMAL IS A FUCKING PSYCHOPATH, YES HE RESIST CONFORMING
MIKE PULLED AN EREN ON ELEVEN UGH IN ASTONISHMENT BUT ALSO UGH IN DISGUST SINCE THEY REMIND ME OF MY NOTP, AND SAYING HOW HE LOVES HER, MILEVEN MAKES ME SOFT GOD
THE WAY THE MUSIC SET AND SHOWED EACH BATTLE JUISFAHKJSAF, I LOVE NANCY SHOOTING AT VECNA UGH, SHE WAS SO BADASS
I CRIED SO MUCH WHEN MAX SAID SHE DIDN'T WANT TO DIE AND ALSO BACK WHEN SHE WAS IN THE SNOWBALL PART, HER CRIES WERE SO GENUINE, SADIE SINK DOING SUCH A GREAT JOB AGAIN
and now my thoughts on our beloved boy eddie's death
yeah i screamed and cried as twice as much, esp when dustin was holding him, like bro what, he can't die, i was saying it with dustin that he can't die and after that the disappointment, the unfairness set in, like steve got bit by a bat too but he lived, dont even get me started on max, IT'S SO UNFAIR, he had his MOMENT, IT WAS HIS YEAR, im just ugh really disappointed by his death, pretty numb about it, who knew one death could bring such a huge feeling of disappointment like the posts ive seen where brutal and really mad but i suppose they had the right since eddie had potential, him dying was unfair, it was just for shock value and it didn't really advance the plot unless they're using that for season five
the disappointment is really real, im really sad and beyond pained that it had to go that way, they're right eddie could've been kept around just like max and robin, we prayed for steve and robin too much, forgetting who we really should've prayed for but yeah im glad those two are alive, i feel really bad for his uncle though, his nephew missing, having his poster constantly vandalized then only told that he was dead ughh it's so unfair, i am in pain and i miss him already, i loved him like a child, he was amazing and fuckkk
RIP baby boy we will miss you
also i remember someone saying that if hopper and el reunite again and hopper says hey kid, they were going to lose it, i wonder how they're doing rn lmao
honestly im so happy that mike and hopper hugged, their relationship in season two was great but then forgotten and soiled at season three so yey
THAT ENDING THO WITH THE MUSIC AND SHIT, GOD I LOVE THAT
to be honest i really wish it ended with season four, idk this season felt like the end and for it to be succeeded feels wrong but all in all it was actually a great season finale, just eddie's death really did sour everyone's enjoyment, despite how i feel ill stick around because i love this show and am too attached to it, it's basically my comfort show
i have more to say regarding my favorite parts but i kinda forgot about them sorry, i watched the two in separate days
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zee-has-commitment-issues · 2 years ago
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I'm so sorry bestie pls fill me in later when ur feeling better
HERE'S YOUR DISTRACTING ASK
do you have any headcanons for season 5 of stranger things? any ships you want to see happen? realistically, how much of what you hope to see do you think will actually happen? is there something that could happen in season 5 that would make you mad?
OKAY BYE
Hey bestie, I'll fill you in when I'm no longer spiralling lmao.
My only hope for ST season 5 is that someone gets some kind of character development. Because the writing in season 4 was so bad that they forgot to change anyone's story from the beginning to the end except Eddie, and he (spoiler) fucking died.
I think realistically they'll push Robbin and Vickie in order to get the "gay watchers" to settle down. I think they'll either push Stancy back together or give Steve some kind of rushed love interest that no one will like. I think Mike and Eleven will stay together, even though we all fucking hate it at this point. The only ship I'm rooting for at this point is Joyce and Hopper. Maybe Max and Lucas.
I think Max will miraculously come back all healed or something in order to not piss off fans. I think Eddie might have an appearance in some way just because they "weren't expecting him to be a fan favorite" and now they want to mooch off that.
I'd like to see Will become the villain, but I doubt it will happen. I'd like to see Jonathan get his shit together, but they often forget he exists at all. I'd like to see Eleven focus on someone other than herself and Mike for like four seconds, but she won't. I'd like to see Nancy actually show some consideration for people (this is controversial, but I actually don't think she's a great person). I'd like to see Lucas actually have a plot line and not be the side character that people can't decide if they love or hate. I'd like to see Mrs. Wheeler finally face some repercussions for her actions (she literally tried to sleep with a teenager and we all just ignore it?) And I'd like Dustin to finally be listened to because he'd never been wrong once.
But none of that will happen, and the Duffers can burn in hell.
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