#HeatherLReid

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Channeling the Chaos

Channeling the Chaos by Heather L Reid

A Scottish wind blows a gale outside my window. Night fades as anaemic daylight fights through the dark dense clouds and thin veil of rain.  A gray mist swirls through every minute of every hour, seeping into my very soul. Winter has devoured the sun and won’t give her back again until April.  Everything is whizzing, whirring, turning around in my busy little brain: sucking my positivity, motivation, creativity down into a black hole of chaos, into oblivion. I’ve lost control of the growing disquiet inside and the demons are unleashed. They whisper my name, challenge my confidence, and paralyze me with fear. Of what? Of doubt, of dark, of destiny. I know I must face it, embrace it— the rising tide of bleak abjectivity that threatens to consume.  To evade is to succumb. In a word, there is power. My gift, my sanity, to channel the chaos and make sense of the world. And with a word, the dark grows still, silent as a ray of light pierces through the swirling mist and lights the path in which I must walk. Step by step, word by word, minute by minute, until I’m back in the place I’m meant to be.