#He hasn't gotten to the point where he asks too much about our world

[creationsofimaginationsblr]

Okay, so a few of you seem to like this idea. and I do have a little more to share. so here we go

Hiding behind a wall, you try your best to hear as Black and Galix talk about...something? It sounds like it's the structure of the void, but from the creators points of view instead of the Narrator's point of view.

"It's a little difficult to explain, but I can try. There's three planes of existence here; There's the plane containing the parables that each set of characters stay in, Then there's a second plane containing the void between areas, And finally there's the studios.

"The parable plane is pretty self explanatory. The void is where it gets interesting though. Typically, with most creations at least, the void is very small. It's more like a staircase between the creations and the studio levels. But, for some reason, the void attached to The Parable acts a lot like a floor unto itself, leaving creators and their creations to create doorways between floors on their own.

"The studios are for artists to transfer into their avatars. Or sonas, if you prefer."

"So those are like the doorways to and from your world, right?" Black quips up.

Galix nods "That floor also contains meeting rooms where we can gather and talk. And those huge bulletins where we can post stuff."

"Wait, what do you mean 'meeting rooms'?"

"I think….if I remember correctly, you've seen one of them before. Remember when Blackkat tried to explain how you were made?" (this post, for the readers at home!)

"....vaguely?" He cringes as if he's in pain at the memory. For a brief second you wonder if doing something like that can damage or perhaps warp the body.

"That's one of our meeting rooms. It's just what it looks like on our side of things."

You jump as something fuzzy brushes past you leg. You almost let out a curse, barely able to stop yourself from giving away your position. You look down to see a little black cat staring up at you with big round eyes. Eager to hear more, you press a finger to your lips to tell this little stray to keep quiet as you zone back in on the conversation.

“Each artist has their quirks. From the tools they use, to the quirks of their form, we all have a few things that make us unique.”

“Wait, what do you mean you use different tools? Don't you all use pens and paper, or drawing tablets?”

“Realistically? Probably. But our avatars are more like…they’re more raw interpretations of how we create. Like, for example, there's this artist named RaccoonTank who uses an abacus. Each color combination corresponds to a stroke of the pen, with the pattern on a single line of the abacus correlates to either how a character for speech is placed, or it can correlate to the colors used in the art. There's another artist named ShyBlue who does use a tablet but, since the form that artist often takes is so small, that artist will often tumble into the tablet and pull the art out of the little pocket of space inside. And before you ask, no, I have no idea how that works. I think it has to do with the thought patterns or maybe some buttons on the side of the tablet, but I have no clue.

(Those two are @raccoontank and @shy-blue-waters, for those watching from behind a wall!)

You jump as the cat meows, the sound rattling you down to your bones. What on earth is this cat doing? You want to hush it again, but it's too late. You run off before you can be seen.

Here, have a doodle too! (forgive me @blackkatdraws, I'm not too used to drawing Black)

I think I might make that top one a full piece on it's own, maybe? I don't know yet. The only idea I've had for his design in this au is that a small earth starts to form in his left eye, with the hear shaped pupil right in the center of it. That and maybe his eyes start showing refection of things that aren't there. Like reflections of trees and random places out in our world that he swears he can see, but that obviously aren't anywhere near him.

Warning! This is just a little babble about a random idea I had! I want to maybe draw or write about this idea, but I have to chew on it a little more. This is mostly here just to get me thinking on it.

I recently scrolled through @blackkatdraws tumblr and came across their Love Plague au post and their 4th wall posts, and I had an idea. Now, I'll preface this by saying - this is just my own note of insanity and I don't know much about this au at all. Again, I'm mostly posting this so that I don't forget about it.

But what if Black had his fourth wall incident only a little bit before he was cracked and reactivated the Lovebug inside of him? What if all of this overwhelming information was still at the front of his mind as he felt himself getting infected? And what if the virus forces him to latch onto this whole thing, making it one of the few things he can focus on?

What I'm trying to say is, what if Love Plague Black started to completely focus on finding out more things about our world? What if he made it his mission to gather as much information as he could, going as far as to actively seek out creators in order to actually understand the world outside?

What if he wondered why so many of us love him? Not just as a narrator but for the things he represents to us? Or maybe he would be more fascinated with what we create and why, what are the meanings behind our tales and where they stem from?

I think he would be rather quick to understand that we're just people on the other side of this wall, but would that facilitate him more? I often think of us creators as something like eldritch creatures, things both simple as can be, yet so far removed from understanding. If he could see past our avatars and through to the person behind that, would he be horrified? Would it be scary to met the face behind a creature who literally has the power to create life?

[nicolesainz]

Hey, really love the writing😍 I was perhaps wondering if it were possible to do a Jenson Button x reader x Fernando Alonso. (Age gap with a young reader like 21years old)

Where the reader is Jenson's girlfriend and Jenson takes her along to a grandprix. After the race while Jenson's busy with interviews the reader walks around the paddock and runs into sweaty, sexy Alonso and he flirts with her FULLY aware that she's Jenson's girlfriend.... And yea some romantic drama perhaps... I fully understand if you're not able to do it though, it was just a suggestion. Thank you for your awesome work❤️

Hands close and teammates closer (JB22 x FA14)

Jenson Button x f!reader x Fernando Alonso

Author's note: Thank you so much for the support, it means the world to me! I am so sorry this too way too long to write. I hope you like it and enjoy it as much as possible.

Also Jenson admitting publicly that Fernando is his man crush, is my new Roman Empire. What do you think? Will Nando go to Mercy along with George for the 2025 season?

Warnings: angst, jealously, possessiveness,

Summary: requested

Monaco has to be one of my favourite circuits on the calendar. And trust me it is not because of the luxury and mamma mia vibes its feeling radiates. What I love, is the fact that I can get lost in the streets of the crown jewel and still be able to guide myself through the lines of the circuits and the fierce sound of engines.

Since this is Jenson's final year in Formula One, I have decided to follow him along in all the races taking place in the calendar, so that this historic season finishes off in a smooth but memorable way. What better feeling than witnessing twenty men in front of your eyes racing hard core in the fastest vehicles on earth and one of them being your boyfriend, right?

With all the eyes being on focused on the two silver arrows that are the championship contenders as well, no one really pays attention to Mclaren's lack of luck this season. Multiple engine failures, pit stop difficulties, strategy errors. It hasn't been the most perfect season the team has had.

Whether it is first, second or even twentieth place, for me, supporting Jenson through thick and thin is my priority. I have witnessed his glory days but that will not stop me from enjoying watching him fight for points in the championship to help the team get back on their feet.

What pleased Jenson even more was when both he and Fernando were into the points after a difficult races. This helped them gain some confidence agains the other midfield teams. Although Jenson wasn't very pleased when Fernando was always following me and him during the race weekend at the paddock. Well, it was mostly me he was following.

Fernando has just gotten out of a long term relationship and seeing his teammate in a happy and healthy one, wasn't boosting his mentality very much. It was the exact opposite. Jenson couldn't really be able to help him given that he hadn't been through such a difficult heartbreak ever.

At first, everything was innocent and friendly. Me and Fernando were casually chatting about our daily lives, his as an F1 driver and mine as an English Professor. Always laughing, making jokes and freely giggling with one another.

Then, when the Spanish Grand Prix arrived and all the drivers were waving at the fans from the paddock and grandstands, everyone was cheering and shouting Fernando's name, given he was the national hero and as he was waving at the audience, he grabbed my waist and held me against his side, as if I was his lady.

That night, Jenson was about to murder his own teammate for the first time. Because the downfall didn't start there. At the Austrian Grand Prix, when Fernando had an unfortunate DNF due to an engine failure, he rushed angrily back to the garage and everyone was trying to console him.

After a few moment, one of the mechanics asked me to go and seek him, given that they were told he wasn't in a position to talk to anyone else but myself, which was very odd.

Austrian Grand Prix flashbacks

"Hey Nando. I am so sorry for the malfunction." I open the door to his driver's room slowly, given that I wasn't aware if he still had his race suit on.

"Come in, Y/N, and thank you. But you know, it's never easy to retire the car after having a good race." Fernando still hadn't looked at me. It is a gutting feeling for a champion to retire so unfortunately.

"I am sure a win is close. One final push and you will be back on the top step of the podium. I have no doubts." I tried to sound as positive as I could, although I knew deep down Mclaren was not capable of winning any race or barely making it to the podium.

"You are the only one who believes in me anymore, y/n. I do not know how to repay you." He got up and took my hands into his, caressing them softly. I really wanted to pull my hands away from his grasp, but instead I made small steps towards the door.

"Jenson believes in you as well, the whole team does. Just do not lose faith in yourself."

"Don't try and give them your credit sweetheart. You are the only one." Before I could react, Fernando landed a kiss on my cheek but I quickly removed my body away from his and walked out of his room.

End of flashback

When I told Jenson, Fernando kissed me he was fuming. Obviously he asked me if I kissed him back, but I denied it. Because I hadn't kissed him, I simply ran away. If there was a hidden camera on Fernando's room I would use it as proof.

At the next race in Hungary, Jenson was still very angry at Fernando that he willingly pushed him off the track and lost 5 places at the beginning of the race, which led to Fernando getting P15 by the end of Lap 1.

Mclaren mechanics were disappointed at Jenson's behaviour. Why would he push his own teammate off the track. Rumors started spreading around the paddock that Jenson was plotting against Fernando and trying to sabotage his races so the team would take into account his bad performances and eventually fire him.

Jenson finished the race in a worthy fourth place, whilst Fernando in P11. Very mixed feelings for the results given that this was the best Fernando could do with a damaged and already underperforming machinery.

Interviewers were flooding Jenson with questions about the first lap incident, what was the actual cause, if he had done it on purpose or it was an accident. All the replied was "I didn't want to lose my position".

As if there wasn't enough drama with Nico and Lewis in the paddock and on the track, now Fernando and Jenson were fueling the media with the answers each were giving to the press.

"I needed to guard my position in order to gain more places"

"I was trying to avoid the cars behind me and eventually fell."

"I did not mean to push Fernando. Clearly driver's error that he went off the track."

"I don't know what Jenson was trying to achieve but he clearly had things going his way today. Pushing off his own teammate. Unbelievable."

"If he thinks I did it on purpose, fine by me, but I know my worth and I am aware of the mistakes I do. First lap incidents occur very often, if he doesn't already know that."

"He is a world champion, like myself. Why is he behaving like we are in go-karts? We should work as a team."

After the interviews, Jenson was called in from McLaren so he could explain himself about the incident and try to save his reputation from getting wrecked because of what he said in the press.

When I walk away from where I left Jenson, I am met with a full blown red, still in his overalls and sweaty Fernando. He is very angry and you can tell from the way his knuckles have gone white.

When he raises his head and looks at me, somehow all the anger that had possessed him, seemed to wash away with a smile covering the pain.

"I am so sorry Fernando, I have no idea why he did so. This all seems ridiculous. I will try to reason him."

"No need cariño. I will take care of him. I know exactly why he is doing so."

What did Fernando knew that I didn't? What was going on, I thought to myself as his eyes were getting shadier and lustier. The use of the pet name made me feel uncomfortable as he was crossing a line that shouldn't have been crossed.

"Why is he doing it then?"

"Because he is clearly jealous. Can't you see it? You are always coming to me in the end."

"I care about you Fernando but not in the way you imagine."

"That is why you let me kiss you the other time in Austria? I know what you are trying to do sweetheart. If you want to be with me just say it."

I was stunned by his statement. From where exactly did he extract this conclusion that I wanted to be with him. I was so disgusted by his saviour. He knew I was Jenson's fiancee. I loved him dearly, so why on earth would I want t be with another man?

I didn't calculate my actions and as Jenson was coming out of the office, my hand instantly landed on Fernando's smirking face. The slap echoed in the room and Jenson's eyes widened enough to pop out from anger.

"I love Jenson so much. There is a reason why I gave up my job to be with him and travel around the world. I will marry this man and I will not allow anyone to interfere in our relationship. I don't know from where you drew the conclusion that I am in love with you, Fernando. I am sorry but you crossed the line."

I ran away from the room and Jenson was following me along, trying to catch up on what was had happened. Tears were storming down my cheeks and I was all flushed up and tensed. If Fernando marked the end to mine and Jenson's relationship I would never forgive him.

"Darling please wait up. What happened?" Jenson's soft voice stopped me on my tracks. I turned around and he was met with a distraught version of myself that he had not met before.

Jenson took me into his arms lovingly, kissing the top of my head, shushing me to calm down, whilst caressing my back gently. I was so shaken by what Fernando had accused me. How could he?

"Talk to me dear. What did he say to you?" His voice was calming me down as he knew I wasn't to blame for what he saw.

"Fernando accused me of hitting on him and wanting to be with him instead of you, which in no way is true." Jenson didn't reply to what I had said. He was silent but tightened his grip on me.

"Say something, anything. I promise to my life that I did not do anything of what he said. Please trust me." I was begging him to utter a single word.

"I am trying not to go back there and chop of his dick. I know you would never do anything to harm our relationship baby. I believe you." He looked deep into my eyes and my heart instantly softened.

"I will stop being in the garage if it means avoiding him at all costs. I will go into the grandstands. I don't mind really." I offered but Jenson instantly rejected it.

"Are you insane? I will simply ask Daniel if he can take you in with him and Max. I trust them blindly, plus you will have much more fun over there." Daniel and Max, the super dynamic duo everyone had been talking about. They are two very funny guys and Jenson has a very good relationship with Daniel.

"I would never want my future wife to not be in the paddock supporting me. I love you immensely and I would hate not having you around, seeing your beautiful face and having someone encouraging me."

"I love you with all my heart Jenson. I am your and only, forever. Thank you for taking care of me. Even in a different garage, I will cheer for you. Even if that means silently so the Red Bull guys don't kick me out."

"Everyone loves me darling, I am sure they won't mind. But don't root very much for Daniel cause he is a womaniser" He winked at me and I laughed with my head hidden inside his chest.

[sweetbillwriting]

Love Just Happens

Part 7 - Girlfriend

Description: Bill Skarsgård, a 40 years old separated father of three tries to live as simple as he can but then he meet Aurora Lou and life becomes even more complicated.

Characters: The future's Bill Skarsgård and others close to him. The rest is my own characters.

Setting: This story is set in the future but because it's hard to say how the world is then (and it isn't that important for the story) the future is similar to our time now, even with fashion and so on.

Warnings: 18+, age difference, smut, alcohol, ageism, a lot of talk about height, jealousy, talk about pregnancy, talk about period, talk about plastic surgery, kinks and fetishes, talk about weight.

Bill chewed his lips so hard he could taste a faint taste of blood yet still he couldn't stop. He looked down at his jean clad thighs and tried to wipe away the dog hair over and over but they seemed to have gotten stuck in the fibers. He waited on Aurora by the kitchen island while she changed clothes. Her dogs both laid and stared at him and it made him even more nervous. He was nervous because now when he sat there alone he started to wonder if she had actually forgiven him. Aurora was taught to always smile and please people around her so maybe she was doing the same to him? He swallowed hard and looked down at her dogs, silently he asked them what they believed.

Aurora came into the kitchen dressed in a pair of silky flared pants in bright green and a pink tube top in a fur-like material. Bill thought the whole outfit was a bit odd but also knew he didn't understand women's fashion. She had put her long hair in a high ponytail but was still makeup free. She walked by Bill without saying anything and he became even more nervous with her silence. She walked to the coffee machine and prepared coffee for the both of them but the silence was too much for Bill even if he wasn't the most chatty person.

"Ehh… Your hair? It isn't blue anymore?" He said carefully, looking at Aurora's platinum blonde ponytail hanging down to the backside of her waist.

"It’s just a color that washes out. It was for the tour but I don't know? I tried it with the outfits and it was a bit much." She turned around and walked toward Bill with a coffee each. She had learned his way and drank almost as much coffee as him now. Bill looked at her from head to toe with a smile.

"I thought you liked much."

Aurora sat down by the kitchen island too.

"Sure but it was too much."

Bill looked down in his coffee cup with a small smile then looked up again at Aurora.

"I like this on you. The blonde. It suits you. But you're beautiful in everything. Feels like you can pull anything off."

"Don't over do it now," she said with a pointed smile.

"Hm?" Said Bill even if he was quite sure what she meant.

"You don't need to shower me in love. I know where I have you, I know you love me."

Bill smiled but it died down slowly because he started to wonder if it really sounded positive. He took a deep breath and looked at Aurora who sipped her coffee.

"Have you forgiven me? I don't know how to interpret you."

Aurora licked her lips and looked down at her dogs but then looked at Bill with a steady gaze.

"I have forgiven you but I need some answers… Like.. It hasn't felt like you have taken our relationship completely seriously. It just felt like you were forced to be more serious because the media found out."

Her eyes were still steady and at that moment she felt stable. She had thought about what she wanted to say to Bill a lot. Even if she loved him and wanted to be with him she knew this was important to talk about. Bill didn't know what to say because he hadn't really expected this. He thought she would want to talk about how he would handle the attention or something, or even that he had been gross when he started to talk about sex so fast on the phone. He doubted a moment of what he wanted to say and dragged his pinky through his eyebrow with a low gaze.

"I guess there is some truth to it… But not because I didn't want to be serious with you, it's just… It felt so complicated and I didn't have the energy to think about it but then when it was out, well I was forced to be more serious but it was a good thing?" He said with a doubtful expression, not because he was unsure on what he said but he was unsure that Aurora would understand. She nodded a little and dragged her finger around the brim of her cup.

"So if the media hadn't found out, would you have introduced me to your daughters?"

"To be honest, I don't know. And as I said, not because I didn't want to but…" He sighed and looked a bit embarrassed. "I didn’t think I would be able to pull my thumb out of my ass,” he continued. “I don't care what anyone thinks but I… I guess I'm just lazy sometimes and avoid things that can blow up."

Bill examined Aurora's reaction closely. He just wanted to be honest and hoped she would be able to take it. After a few seconds, that felt extremely long for Bill, she smiled, her bright smile, bigger than she had smiled before that day. Bill smiled too, spontaneously at seeing her smile.

"I get it. I totally get it. I do the same thing but I don't do it out of laziness. I'm just afraid of conflicts and even if I care so much about something my first impulse is to avoid conflicts."

"Yeah, yeah, exactly. But I avoid things that can become unwelcomed work."

The both of them smiled because they had done the same thing but for different reasons. They were silent for a while. They looked into each other's eyes deeply and could almost feel how the butterflies in their stomachs said hello to each other.

"We have never said that we are a couple…" said Aurora lowly.

"Haven't we?" Bill furrowed his brows.

"No, everyone just started to call you my boyfriend."

Bill nodded a little then stood up from his chair and walked slowly toward Aurora. He took a hold of the sides of her chair and bent down so he was at her level. Aurora giggled a little and laid her arms around his neck.

"Aurora Lou, do you want to be my girlfriend?" He said without breaking eye contact. She nodded with a bright smile.

"Yeah, I want to be your girlfriend." Bill smiled just as brightly and gave her a soft kiss.

They moved to the living room and laid down on the couch with Bill on top of Aurora, between her legs. They made out softly. Bill was afraid to seem way to horny after his screw up on the phone but Aurora felt the opposite and wondered why Bill wasn’t trying anything. She had a tube top on without a bra, it was such easy access. They continued to make out and instead of touching Aurora Bill focused on holding himself up to not crush her. Meanwhile Aurora had put her hands under Bill's t-shirt and dragged her long nails down his back. She knew he liked that and she often gave him long red marks on his back. He shivered and laughed a little when he heard the familiar sound of his belt open. He really just wanted to keep it nonsexual so she would understand he didn't just want her for the sex but instead she was on him. Would he give in after all? Just when he heard the sound of the zipper of his jeans, his phone rang on the coffee table. He took a break from the liplock with Aurora just to see who it was. His ex. He doubted and looked at Aurora who smiled.

"Answer. I think that's for the best."

Bill sat up between Aurora's legs and dragged a big hand over her smooth shin inside her pants leg when he answered.

"Hey, how's it going?" Said his ex.

"Ehh… Fine. I just ran into Aurora so I’m taking a bit longer."

His ex was silent but Bill waited for her to say something. Aurora looked at Bill, it was frustrating for her to not understand what they were saying and why he was so silent. She had heard her name and that made her even more curious.

"But I will be home soon so we can eat together. And I will shop." He said after a while.

"Okay… But how late will you be? We thought you would be home in an hour?"

"Just thirty minutes or so."

Bill continued to drag his hand over Aurora's shin and looked at her when he felt her sit up. She gave him a teasing smile and pulled her tube top down and back up again fast just to spite him. Bill smirked and shook his head at her and then realized he hadn't heard a word his ex said.

"...Ehh I didn't catch that?" He said trying to sound like it was just the ending he had missed.

"Juice! You must buy juice."

"Oh, sure, sure. But can you write a list?" He was afraid she had said more items that he missed while he got a nipple show from his girlfriend.

"Okay. But come home soon. The kids are here to see you."

"Absolutely."

They hung up and Bill looked at Aurora. Before she had even realized he looked at her he took a hold of her face and pressed his lips against hers.

"I love you," he said and laughed lowly.

Aurora giggled and kissed him again.

"And I love you. But Bill? Now it's time for you to go to your lovely daughters. Okay?"

She smiled and put her fingertip against his chest. She maybe didn't understand Swedish but she could still understand why his ex called.

"Yeah. Yeah." Said Bill with a smile, he was happy that she encouraged him to be a good father.

"I can send you some filth tonight." She dragged her hand over his crotch and took a steady grip around his package. Bill jerked but laughed at her forwardness. He loved that she could do such a thing and at the same time smile innocently with that girly giggle.

��××

"She lives here??" His middle daughter almost screamed when they pulled up with the rental car outside of Aurora's house. Or was house even the right word? "It looks like a castle!"

Bill smiled just a little because he didn't want to encourage materialism but knew it would probably be hard in Aurora's home. It was quite ridiculous and nothing his girls had really seen before.

He looked back at his ex who gave the property a look. He couldn't read her face but he knew her so well he was almost sure she felt some sort of disgust mixed with envy. She had insisted on coming along to Aurora’s. She wanted to meet the woman that Bill invited into her children's life and he had met Henrik several times so he didn't really have so much to say about it. He had heard that Aurora was nervous of the thought of meeting his ex. There were so many things that made it weird. Bill had knocked up that woman three times, he still had a close relationship with her but she was also 21 years older than Aurora. She was old enough to be her parent, sure Bill was too in one way but not as much, her own mother was just two years older than his ex.

Bill helped his kids get out of the car and carried two of the overnight bags. His oldest carried her own while looking at the house with big eyes. Bill looked at her silently but didn't say anything. He let her stand in her own thoughts as long as she didn't seem upset and she just watched the house in wonder.

They were a bit early, Bill had tried to call and message Aurora but with no luck. But it was just 30 minutes so he felt it wouldn’t make so much of a difference. Bill pushed in the code to the gate and after having walked through the big well trimmed yard he put in the code to the door.

"Come now! You will have time to play later," shouted Bill to his youngest daughters who had started to chase each other on the big lawn in front of the house. The girls walked up to the rest of their family while Bill walked in through the door.

"Lou?" He called out in the chandelier adorned hallway. Suddenly his youngest ran past him in a fast speed into the living room screaming:

"Princess dresses! Princess dresses!"

On a rack just inside of the entryway to the living room hung several couture dresses. Bill panicked, they probably cost more than anything he owned.

"Hey, ey, ey, ey!" He snatched his daughter up before her little fingers had dug into the expensive silk and tulle.

"Let me go!" She screamed disappointedly and pushed her dad's shoulder.

"No. You know that you don't touch others things without permission."

She got silent, because she knew that but still pouted while in his arms. Bill looked at the rest of the females in the hallway as they looked around with big eyes. His daughters' eyes lit up even more when Aurora came down the stairs.

"Are you already here?" She said sweetly and ran down the stairs on light feet. She was dressed in a black and white checkered mini skirt with a pink cropped t-shirt. Her hair was even more platinum than the last time he saw her and hung down in perfect Hollywood curls. When she came closer he saw that her t-shirt had a text in a stronger pink color. It was the Barbie logo and Bill smiled amused because of the irony. His ex would be annoyed as hell. Bill sat his youngest down on the floor to be able to say hello to Aurora with a small peck on the lips and an arm around her waist. Aurora stood on her tippy toes and giggled a little when Bill smiled. They didn't notice how his ex had looked away uncomfortably, his oldest looking embarrassed while his youngest were looking at them with big smiles.

Bill let Aurora go and she lowered herself to standing flat on her feet. She wore fluffy socks like she often did. Bill had learned her feet were often cold.

"This is Aurora Lou, but they can call you..?" Bill looked down at Aurora.

"Aurora or Lou. It doesn't matter," she said kindly to his daughters. She didn't really dare to look at his ex.

Bill helped his daughters to introduce themself with names and ages in English. It was just his youngest that couldn't speak English. His two oldest daughters had followed him with his work often but when his youngest was born it became a little much to bring them all. Also because his oldest school work became much more serious. They had met many of his American friends, but not enough for her to learn to speak English, just to understand much of it.

But she was also just four, soon five.

At last Bill introduced his ex to Aurora and she shook her hand. It was awkward for both of them.

"You have a really nice home," said his ex with an uncomfortable smile.

"Aw, thanks. I have only lived here for a year."

His ex was close to asking if she lived with her parents before that but knew she shouldn't be that bitchy, especially not in front of her kids.

"Well, then I’ll take the car to Eric's and get you tomorrow?" Said she to Bill. She arranged to sleep at a friend's house while they visited Aurora. She hugged her kids goodbye and told them in Swedish that they could just call if they wanted anything. She was afraid they would think it was scary to sleep somewhere else, especially their middle daughter who was more nervous than the other two.

"Can I just talk to you quickly?" She asked Bill in English. She didn't want to make Aurora uncomfortable. She knew it was awful to stand next to people talking another language.

"Is that okay?" Bill asked Aurora, who would be alone with his daughters for a short moment.

"Sure, I got some really pretty dresses this morning. You can try them out if you want?" She smiled at his daughters and both Bill and his ex looked at Aurora with worry. Did she understand what could happen?

"The princess dresses?" Asked his middle daughter with big eyes, then the youngest understood what they were talking about and ran to the living room again.

"Princess dresses!" She screamed in Swedish but Aurora could understand what she said in the context. She smiled at Bill's oldest daughter.

"I hope it is okay that we play dress up a bit but you can look around if you want."

Bill smiled at Aurora and felt so safe with having his children around her. He could immediately see that she had a talent with kids, both younger and older. His ex could see that too but she got nervous. Henrik didn't have much of a talent with girls while Bill's partner lived like a princess and seemed as comfortable being with kids as adults. Aurora's dogs said hello to his daughters and Bill's oldest looked even more elated. She loved animals.

Bill and his ex walked out to the porch and she looked around and shook her head. Bill didn't say anything, he didn't have anything to say really and was prepared for what she would say.

"She seems really sweet Bill but… come on! Doesn't look like you don't have a crisis! She looks like she's seventeen!"

Bill sighed and shook his head.

"I understand this feels weird for you but just stop with those comments. She's an adult, almost as old as I was when you and I became a couple. Just accept it because you don't have any power over this anyway."

She stood quiet with her arms crossed.

"But no funny business in front of the girls."

"What the fuck? No, of course not! I have been a parent for twelve years, just like you. I don't need this now, just like I didn't need it before. And yeah, Aurora is 24 but she's not stupid in any way. Let it go."

She looked away annoyed. She didn't have more to say but Bill could see that she hadn't let it go.

×××

Bill was happily surprised how easy it was to get his girls together with Aurora, not because he didn't believe she wouldn't be able to handle it. It was more so his concern over his children being uncomfortable seeing their dad with a new woman. The only one of his daughters that seemed to react when he and Aurora kissed or touched each other lovingly was his oldest but she just looked embarrassed just as she was embarrassed when she saw other grown ups being intimate with each other too. While Aurora and the two youngest were outside playing with the dogs, Bill and his oldest stayed inside. He tried to plan dinner while she took her right as a tweenie to lay on the couch and look at her phone. He let her be until he wanted her opinion and walked into Aurora's luxurious living room. His daughter walked around and it was obvious she was filming the extravagant interior but also the couture dresses hanging on the rack.

"What are you doing?" Said Bill with an authoritative voice and gave his daughter a hard gaze. She put down her phone and looked away ashamed.

"I just wanted…"

"No. This is not your home. You don't have the right to share that. Whoevers home it is." Bill spoke strictly to her because he really thought she knew better. His daughter didn't say anything because she did know better, she didn't even share pictures from their home with others, other than with her closest friends.

"I'm sorry… It's just that this girl in my class, Tyra, really wanted to see how Aurora lived…"

Bill sighed a little and pulled her with him to the couch.

"So this is what your mother has talked about… You have said to me that Tyra isn't very nice and that she skips classes."

His daughter looked away.

"I get that she may seem cool but her behavior isn't good for you. I don't want you to be with her." Bill tried to sound just soft and kind but behind it was clearly the voice of a worried parent. He may be an actor but he had noticed that the feelings of a dad were hard to hide.

"Yeah, yeah…" said his daughter and laid down on the couch with her phone again. Bill sighed but gave her forehead a kiss before he walked towards the kitchen.

"She is much shorter than me," said his daughter before Bill walked out from the room.

"And her feet are smaller than mine…"

"Hm? Tyra's?" Said Bill oblivious and walked up to his daughter again.

"No, Aurora," she said, annoyed and sat up. Bill made a deep exhalation. He had known Aurora would be shorter than his daughter but didn't think it would become a thing.

"Yes? She is shorter than you," he said matter of factly and sat down next to her again.

"So? That's weird?"

"No honey, it isn't. We all are different heights and you are a tall girl while Aurora is short."

"But she's an adult!"

"Yeah and you will meet many adults that are shorter than you and you will probably become a bit taller even. But that is just a natural thing of life. Just like we have different skin colors, different hair colors and different sizes. And it's just as beautiful being tall as short." He said it softly to his daughter and put her hair behind her ear.

"But you are with someone short." She looked away embarrassed. It was embarrassing to confess to her dad she cared what boys thought.

"Yeah but I'm not with Aurora because of her height. And before that I was with your mother who is quite tall. I am with Aurora because she makes me happy and inspires me. I don't love her because she's short."

His daughter nodded a little and Bill gave her hand a squeeze before standing up again.

"So you love her? Mom said it wasn't anything serious between you two." She looked up at her dad carefully. She had learned it wasn't always smart to tell her parents what one had said behind the others back.

"She said that? To you?" Bill couldn't completely mask his upset voice.

"No, she said it on the phone. That you just need 'to get it out of your system'."

Bill licked his lips and sat down with a sigh.

"You should always listen to your mother but… Only the people who are in a relationship know what's going on between them. Just like you and I, your mother doesn't always understand our relationship either."

She sat quiet a short moment then smiled and laid her head on her dad's shoulder. Bill hugged her close and gave her temple a kiss. She had always been his little girl.

×××

The day went smoothly with only some incidents in between, like when his youngest refused to give back Aurora's Dior wallet or when his middle daughter accidently locked herself in one of the bathrooms. Bill stressed, mostly because he thought Aurora would get annoyed but she was just as calm and kind the whole time. He wasn't surprised really, because she was always that way but being with three kids could make even the calmest person annoyed. Bill looked at her while she danced with his younger daughters and talked about a TV series with his oldest. She was a natural and for a short second he thought about how it would be to have kids with her.

After his two youngest had gone to bed in Aurora's pink guest rooms, the two of them were alone with his oldest. He noticed she became a little uncomfortable when Aurora came down and had changed her clothes. She dressed into a pajama set, a silky baby blue crop top with matching shorts. She didn't think it was so revealing because it wasn't that much less fabric than the outfit she had on before but the difference was that it looked more sensual and Bill understood his daughter's imagination went wild by seeing Aurora dressed like that close to her father. Bill took the blanket from his left and laid it over Aurora who snuggled into his side while his daughter sat on the right corner of the couch. Aurora didn't think anything about it, especially because Bill had his hand under the blanket, patting her bare waist. His daughter didn't see that and he didn't see it as something sexual either. All of them became just as shocked when there was a knock on the door.

"Shoohoo!" Called Erica loudly from the hallway and Aurora ran out to her in a panic.

"Hush! There are kids sleeping upstairs!' Whispered Aurora upset.

Erica and Roxy stood in the hallway, with a bottle of wine each.

"Oh right, can we come in? We promise we will talk with a lower voice." Said Erica, taking off her shoes without Aurora saying yes.

"Hey?" Bill came out to the hallway and looked at the girls surprised.

"Hey handsome," said Erica.

"The dilf," said Roxy suddenly. She had never said anything of that kind to him before and both Aurora and Bill became a bit uncomfortable.

"Eh… My oldest is still up…" he said looking towards the living room and he could see his daughter peeking out. He hoped she hadn't heard Roxy's comment.

"You can come out, it's just my girlfriends. They are loud but nice," said Aurora to her and with a shy smile she walked out to them.

"Wow! Girl! You're a model! So gorgeous!" Said Erica and Bill's daughter blushed like crazy. Bill had heard it before, a model agency had even contacted him but as long as he could decide he wouldn't let his daughter become a model.

"Can we come in? We just want to have some girl talk? You can be with us!" Said Erica and gave his daughter a side hug. Bill doubted at first but looked at Aurora. He trusted her and it would probably be awesome for his daughter to have girl talk with them. Bill looked at his daughter who still looked shy but also excited.

"Okay," she said but looked at her dad and Aurora to see what they would say.

"I can watch something on my own in the TV room," said Bill and gave both his daughter and Aurora a smile to see if it was okay. The both of them smiled back and Aurora gave him a peck on the cheek.

Bill snatched a beer from the fridge then he laid down on the couch in the TV room and stretched out his full length over it. He played a series he had watched by himself between scenes on set but could still hear a bit of the girls chatter in the living room. He heard mostly Erica talk in the beginning but soon the others talked just as much, even his daughter. He could hear her laugh and he guessed she asked them all sorts of questions. She could be quite nosy and being with three women around 25 was probably exciting for her. In a way he wanted to hear what they said too but knew that conversation would change if he was in the room.

Erica and Roxy drank white wine while Aurora and Bill's daughter drank Coca Cola Zero but to make it more festive served Aurora it to her in a margarita glass with lime. His daughter sat with big eyes and open ears and listened to the women talk about fashion, gossip and guys. They didn't say anything inappropriate, mostly it was Erica that complained about her date not doing enough of an effort. Even Bill's daughter asked questions about it because it was so fun to talk to them, they didn't speak to her as if she were a kid. She looked at all of them, she had never been with women around their age and all of them had great jobs and style. She felt that Erica's job seemed the most fun and when she said that, Erica became so happy she wanted to do her makeup.

"But Lou…" said his daughter while Erica applied her eyeliner. She hadn't called her that before but had heard Aurora's friends call her that.

"Yeah?"

"Why are you together with my dad? He's so much older than you."

Aurora giggled a little and blushed.

"Because I'm madly in love with him."

"But you had Timmy. Timmy Laurent!"

"And he was the worst!" Said Erica.

"Was he? What?" Bill's daughters almost opened her eyes but remembered Erica was doing her makeup.

Aurora gave Erica a look.

"He wasn't so kind, no. While your dad is. He makes me feel safe."

All of them were silent for a moment and just thought about Aurora's words.

"And I think he's the most handsome man in the world!" Said Aurora with a childish voice. All of them giggled, all of them with different emotions.

Bill stood outside of the living room, his plan was to walk through the living room to the kitchen to get a new beer when he heard them talk about him and he became frozen outside of the entrance listening to them. He wondered what his daughter felt when Aurora commented on his looks. He believed she was probably really uncomfortable but if he had been in the room he would have seen her open her eyes and smile towards Aurora. She was happy her father had found real love.

Bill walked through the living room when he heard that they had started to talk about makeup instead of him, on his way back from the kitchen he walked up to them. At first glance it looked like there were four women in their 20s sitting on the couches but one of them was his twelve year old daughter with professional makeup on and hair done by Erica. He looked at her surprised and felt a weird feeling of pride and sorrow.

"Oh wow, honey. You look so pretty," he said and played with a bit of her hair. She looked proud and looked at Erica with a smile. Bill gave Aurora a quick look and she could see the mixed feelings in his eyes. There was probably a side of him that didn't want to see her in such makeup. Aurora smiled a bit at him and stood up to drag him down on the couch in between her and Roxy. She gave him a little peck and played with the hair on his neck. His daughter gave them a quick look but didn't care, she was focused on talking about the makeup with Erica.

"Oh my god!" Said Roxy suddenly. She looked at her phone but then looked up at the others.

"I found a picture! From when we were fifteen! Before your…"

"She lost her virginity!" Interrupted Erica loudly when she saw Aurora's panicked look. It wasn't the best thing to say because Bill's daughter got so embarrassed it looked like she would run away. Roxy gave her a quick glance and then looked at Erica before giving Bill her phone. Aurora tried to get her attention, so she wouldn’t show Bill but Roxy just continued to look at Erica. Bill looked down at the phone, of the picture of Aurora and Roxy as awkward teens. Roxy looked like herself but there was something with Aurora that was different… Her nose was bigger and with a bit of a bump. It wasn't that perfect nose he was used to. Bill gave her a look but she just looked down and nervously played with her nails. Bill didn't say anything. It was hard to know what to say in front of his daughter but also because it felt like whatever he said would make Aurora upset. But Bill's silence was just as hard for Aurora and she believed it meant he was disappointed or even felt disgusted by her, that she wasn't as natural as he had thought.

"I got such an awful headache I'm going to go to bed…" she said with her head hung low but all of them could see that her eyes were shiny.

"Lou… I'm sorry I didn't know…" said Roxy and stood up.

"I just want to be alone…" said Aurora and walked up the stairs.

Bill leaned back on the couch with a sigh and laid Roxy's phone next to him. His daughter looked at the adults confused.

"I think I should help you take off the makeup then it's time for us to go. I think your dad probably wants to check Lou," Erica said to her but also indirectly to Bill so he would know that they would take care of his daughter and he could check on Aurora. That was what she thought he should do. Bill gave Erica a look, then Roxy but she sat with her head bent down from anxiety.

"Okay…" Bill said and moved slowly up to the second floor. He had no idea what he would say to Aurora, especially because he didn't think it was such a big deal.

She laid like a little kitten on her side of the bed and he could hear her cry silently. Her shoulders bobbed with the sobs.

"Hey… Babe…" he said softly and crawled up in bed behind her. He hushed her and hugged her from behind with his lips pressed against her cheek.

"I don't know why you're so sad but I don't care if you fixed your nose… Hey… I don't care…"

She turned slowly around and looked at him with red eyes and wet cheeks.

"I know I am a fake… I know that…"

Bill wiped her cheek with his thumb and hugged her close.

"No you're not. You're the most pure person I know. A little nose job doesn't change that…"

She wiped her eyes with the backside of her hand and breathed deeply.

"But you would have never wanted to be with me if I had… My old nose."

"Of course I would. You would be beautiful with that too."

Aurora smiled a little and wiped her eyes again.

"I'm sorry I haven't told you."

Bill smiled comfortingly and kissed her forehead.

Bill let Aurora stay in bed but he said good bye to her friends and said good night to his oldest daughter who moved to her guest room and was followed by Aurora's dogs. His daughter was still a bit confused about what had happened to Aurora but Bill stuck to the lie that she had a headache. He let her have the dogs in her room and felt she was safer with them there.

In the bedroom Aurora had calmed down and had made herself ready for bed but he became quite surprised when he saw her naked in bed. He dragged a hand over his face and lifted the cover carefully to see more of her.

"Lock the door," she said and spread her legs.

Bill made a painful sound and laid the cover over her.

"I can't…"

Aurora looked at him confused, especially because she could see that he was already becoming hard in his sweatpants.

"They must be able to come in if there is something… They can become quite sad and…" he sighed and lifted the cover again.

Aurora spread her legs again and pushed her tits together just to taunt him.

"No…" Bill said with a painful whiny voice.

"So you mean that we can't… Fuck?"

Bill sat down on the edge of the bed and dragged a big hand from her chest down to her hip.

"Sure we can, it's just… A little more work."

Aurora gave him a skeptical look but dragged her naked foot over his growing member.

"And you can't be as loud as you used to…" He continued with a low voice.

She smirked and watched Bill's hand explore her body.

"Do you want to gag me?"

Bill laughed softly and stood up to take his clothes off. Aurora watched him shamelessly and enjoyed seeing him already hard and ready. He crawled under her cover and she giggled because of his clumsiness. He smirked a little and laid down on top of her, poking her with his hard cock.

"Daddy…" she whispered while Bill dragged his thumb over her lips that had something soft and shiny on them. He pushed his thumb into her mouth and felt at the same time if she was wet and ready for him. He was a bit nervous that one of his daughters would come in just when they were lost in each other but they were left alone all night. He even fucked her quite hard but it didn't seem like his daughters heard them.

×××

"So you were fifteen?"

Bill and Aurora laid close together, it was early morning and they enjoyed the alone time before his daughters would wake them.

"Yeah… and to get signed I needed to get a nose job and lose ten pounds." Aurora said, answering Bill's question. "So my father gave me a new nose." Bill knew her father was a plastic surgeon but still he had never had the thought that Aurora had done anything.

"But you haven't done anything else?" He asked carefully.

"Not yet. But I probably will when I'm older. This industry is that way. I have thought about getting a boob job."

Bill gave her a confused look, then down at her naked chest.

"No. Your tits are perfect."

She giggled a little, and even more when Bill dragged his thumb over her nipple.

"I think you have gotten a butt lift," she joked and patted Bill's bum. He wore boxers, ready if something would happen.

"Yeah. Twice." He smirked and kissed her neck until she laughed at the tickling feeling.

Both of them wished they could get closer again but it was too risky, especially when they could hear Aurora's corgi whining outside of the door. She would wake everyone up if she continued. Bill sighed and stood up.

"Should I take them out?" He sighed tiredly and pulled on his sweatpants.

"If you have energy for it," answered Aurora and stretched out in bed. She was still naked and sat up shielded by the pink silk sheet. Bill smiled at her and kissed her.

"No, but I can do it anyway," he said smiling and kissed her again.

Aurora smiled and laid down again and Bill walked out of the bedroom and gave Aurora's naked back a final look. The corgi stood just outside of the door and whined even louder when she saw Bill and jumped against his legs.

"Yeah, yeah…" said Bill and looked after the golden retriever. She sat in the room his oldest daughter had slept in. The bed was made and confused he walked to the room which stood empty. That the bed was made made him concerned and he dragged his hand through his hair. The corgi continued to whine as it ran between the stairs and Bill like she wanted to show him something. Bill followed even if he questioned the dogs signals in the past but Aurora always said the corgi was really intelligent while the golden was kind but a bit stupid. She ran down the stairs fast towards the door and barked once. Bill sighed, she just wanted to go out.

"Honey?" He shouted and looked around the house, ignoring the corgi that stood by the door whining. He called his daughter's name but didn't get an answer. When he came back to the hallway, the corgi barked again and jumped against the door and then Bill saw that his daughter's shoes were gone.

"What is it?" Said Aurora from the stairs. She stood together with his youngest daughter and they both looked tired, dressed in pajamas.

"Fu… She's gone. What the fuck..?!" He said with panic in his voice. "Her shoes! Fuck, she must have heard…" Aurora took his youngest hand because it was obvious she was nervous seeing her dad upset and cussing.

"Do you really think she would run away because of that?" Aurora said carefully.

She walked down the stairs, still holding his daughter's hand and opened the door so her dog could run out to pee.

"I need to call their mother… She has probably called her if there was something…" He ran up the stairs before Aurora had been able to say anything to him. She looked down at the young girl who spun her pajama t-shirt in her hand.

"We should go up and talk with dad a little…" She didn't really know what to do with her so she took her along to the bedroom where Bill tried to contact his ex without luck.

"Bill," said Aurora but he didn't seem to listen. She took her phone and opened an app.

"Bill?" She said louder.

"Please I need to talk with their mother…" he said, she could hear panic and annoyance in his voice.

"But can you just listen to me for one minute?"

He sighed and looked up from his phone.

"If she had left the property I would have gotten a notice. I get one every time the gate opens. And if she had run away in another way the security company would have contacted me."

Bill looked at her puzzled.

"So she is here somewhere?" He said calmer.

"Yeah, she is here somewhere."

Bill kissed Aurora hard.

"I love you. And I love your home!"

She smiled a little and let Bill take his youngest and continued to search for his oldest. Aurora breathed deeply and tried to calm herself down. While Bill ran around everywhere without thought she tried to figure out where his daughter could be. She walked down and looked at the open door. Her corgi hadn't come in yet and it gave Aurora an idea. She pulled on her trench coat that hung in the hallway and her sneakers and walked out. She called for her corgi instead of Bill's daughter and soon the dog came out behind a bush. Aurora smiled to herself and looked behind the bush. His daughter sat on the ground alone with wet cheeks.

"Please don't tell dad I'm here…" She said fast and wiped her cheeks. Aurora gave her a worried look.

"Can I just say that I found you? He's really worried."

His daughter sighed and nodded a little.

Aurora sat down next to her and took up her phone.

"I've found her but… Can you let us be alone a while?"

Bill was quiet on the line. He had been so worried and now she didn't want to talk to him. He took a deep breath and tried to remember that he trusted Aurora.

"Okay…" he said and sat down on the couch with his youngest daughter.

When Aurora had hung up she turned to his daughter.

"Has something happened?"

She sat quietly and looked embarrassed.

"I got my period…"

Aurora gave her a small friendly smile.

"Is it the first time?"

The girl nodded a little and looked away.

"Okay, but I can help you with that. It's nothing weird."

"Not dad," she said fast and with some panic in her voice.

"No, just you and I. Okay? I have pads and maybe you’d want to take a shower?"

His daughter nodded a little.

"Do you want me to call your dad and say that we want the hallway and downstairs bathroom for ourselves?"

She nodded again but doubted for a while.

"It stained the sheets…" She looked down ashamed.

"That's okay. That happened to me in the beginning too. They just need a good wash."

Aurora gave her a calming smile before calling Bill.

Bill was even more confused by Aurora's call saying that they wanted alone time in the house. He wondered if his daughter had already started to meet guys and someone had been mean to her. He couldn't connect it at all but let Aurora and his daughter have their space so that they could walk to one of the bathrooms undisturbed by both him and her younger sisters. Aurora got pads, a pair of panties from the girl's overnight bag, a dark towel and one of her coziest robes. When Bill's oldest was alone in the bathroom he came up to Aurora with a confused, worried face. His younger daughters sat in the TV room watching a movie.

"She got her period," Aurora said softly and calmly like it wasn't a big deal at all. Bill wouldn't have thought so either but now it was his daughter. His little girl.

"Oh…" he dragged his hand through his hair. Aurora smiled and laid her hand on his chest.

"She's still your little girl."

Bill nodded a little.

"What do I say? To her?"

"You don't have to say anything. It's probably for the best. She's so embarrassed right now. But don't show that you're uncomfortable or something."

Bill nodded and took Aurora's hand that laid on his chest and kissed the back of it.

When his oldest came out from the bathroom she wore Aurora's hot pink fluffy robe. Bill was in the kitchen making Swedish pancakes with a towel over his shoulder. He had put on jeans and a white t-shirt. He looked at her with a smile.

"Are you hungry?" He asked softly and flipped a pancake in the air to show off. She giggled a little and nodded.

"Where are the others?"

"Aurora helping them pack. I think maybe something of hers had crawled down into one of their bags…" he said with a pointed smile. They both knew the youngest in the family still had some problems with "mine and yours".

"I should also pack… But dad?"

He looked up again from the pancake in the pan. "I really like Lou." She smiled with a blush before walking out from the kitchen. Bill looked after her for a while and smiled to himself. His chest glowed with warm feelings but also pride, both over his daughter and his girlfriend.

After breakfast they didn't have much time before the kids' mother was there. Aurora thought it felt a bit strange that Bill would go with her but knew it was for the kids, not for his ex. She stood in front of the mirror in her "make up bathroom" and applied a thick line of eyeliner over her light blue eyeshadow. She did it perfectly even if Bill's two oldest daughters were an audience. They looked at her with big eyes, doing her sixties inspired look that matched her long sleeved short dress with a multi colored striped pattern. She had put her hair up in two ponytails. She looked at the girls with a smile that watched her like she was a living doll.

"Girls! Your mom is here!” Bill called in Swedish from down stairs. The youngest of the two watching Aurora ran down fast to their mom but the oldest waited on Aurora to come with her. Aurora didn't know if it was because she wanted to be with her or just good manners but she was happy she stayed with her, it was easier meeting Bill's ex with someone next to her. The mom hugged all of her daughters and gave Aurora a stiff smile. They all spoke Swedish at that moment and she stood next to Bill a bit awkwardly. If she had known Swedish she would have heard all the nice things the girls said about her home, her dogs, her clothes but especially about her. How kind, fun and sweet she was. Aurora looked up at Bill, who looked awfully proud and pleased. In that moment he forgot Aurora couldn't understand and that she, the one they talked about, stood dumbfounded next to him.

"What are they saying?" She said lowly to Bill who bent down to hear her. He smiled big.

"Oh, right, sorry. How much they like you. What a beautiful home you have but mostly how beautiful you are, inside, an out."

He thought he said it lowly but his ex could hear him and see Aurora's blushing smile. She really wanted to like Aurora, because it was obvious she was a good person but it was too provoking seeing her with Bill.

Out on the porch the kids said goodbye to Aurora with hugs and kissed her dogs. The longest hug she got was from the oldest daughter that felt Aurora had become a friend. Her mother stood behind and looked at them confused but would later find out why they seem to have such a close relationship so fast. When they walked to the car stayed Bill behind so he could say goodbye to his girlfriend in private.

"They love you. Mhm, they totally love you," he said and laid his arms around her waist so he could lift her up. Her dress followed the motion but she didn't care. She giggled and gave him a kiss. He sat her down a moment just to lift her up again so she could put her legs around his waist, it made the dress glide up almost completely. They kissed softly a couple of times but it soon became more intense and they made out passionately.

Bill's ex moved the car when she saw how their kisses became more heated. The couple had thought that no one could see them but all of his daughters and their mother had seen them. It wasn't until she saw how Aurora's dress had glided up and Bill's massive hands playing with the small amount of material she had under the dress, that she moved the car so the girls couldn't see them. It didn't seem like they did because they still couldn't stop talking about Aurora and their mother sighed loudly.

Bill sat Aurora down on the floor of the porch again and she fixed her dress and hair. Bill wiped his lips from Aurora's sticky lip gloss but smirked pleased and cocky. He moved close to her again and pressed his body against her.

"Fuck I love you so much and you're so great with my kids… I just want to knock you up." He said it like he had said something sexy and bit his lip. Aurora giggled a little even if her heart beated with panic.

×

[hungrydolphin91]

Xillia 2???

it has been. 293 days since the last update. but we actually did it. My sister and I returned to xillia 2 after 9 months 😅 Apparently we were right at the start of chapter 8, about to enter the Fractured Dimension where Julius escaped to. A good part of the story, somewhat ruined by our unfamiliarity after so much time had passed 😓

Neither of us remember ANYTHING about where we were in the plot, or even how to play 😅 Me: "In this version of the story, Ludger developed total amnesia between chapters"

Me: "You might want to buy some items, once we go in we won't be able to leave." Sis: "Oh that's right, we have to kill the whole world first." Me: "Yup, it's genocide or bust." Her: "I want that on a bumper sticker."

My sister saw Elle rush to pick up the shell on the beach and immediately wished for her to get mauled by a monster crab. Which she was, two minutes later 😅 Her Elle hate is still going strong nine months later

Julius is humming from atop beachside rocks in order to lure Ludger. Sis: "He's literally a siren."

Unfortunately some of the sweetness of this adorable scene was lost by our pizza arriving in the middle of the cutscene but I at least enjoyed being reminded of how cute Julius's care for his brother is ;_;

I don't think I had previously seen the bonus Elize scene where she tells Elle, who is suffering from the stigma arte or whatever it's called, to hang in there because Bunnykins hasn't visited her yet. That's like saying "You have to stay alive Elle, it's what Spongebob would have wanted!!"

In Sharilton, Driselle wanted to bury a time capsule. Sis: "Wait, does she have time powers too??"

I don't think I can verbally describe it but our party of Ludger, Jude, Elize and Alvin all levelled up at once and ALL of them said their catchphrases like "You've gotten stronger!" "Guess who just got stronger?" "I want to get stronger!" "I have to get stronger!" And just when we thought it was over, Elize fucking repeated her phrase in the overworld too. Fucking dead 😂

My sister pointed out the feathers that Ludger wears by his belt and asked if it was a cat toy. Idk if that was the design intent but that's canon to me now.

We stopped after arriving at Xian Du, but we're en route to meet Gaius I think, maybe after another character chapter. Stay tuned, hopefully we'll play again before another nine months passes 😅

Master post link here

[junebugwriter]

Tiring night. I work overnight as a hotel night auditor, and a lot of that is a pull between customer service and managing certain accounting tasks for the next day, which is a pretty easy job all things told, as long as the "customer service" variable is relatively manageable. However, it was a Friday night, and those are usually rough. Phones ringing off the hooks, guests lining up in front of me, you know the drill. It can be maddening.

I get the feeling it wasn't supposed to be like this. None of this is supposed to be like this. The more money people have to blow, the angrier they seem. I'm doing a the job of a supervisor for the pay of an entry level worker, and I've done so for six months, since the time the last overnight supervisor quit. I've just... kind of done it. Nobody asked. I've trained several people in that time. I've applied for the supervisor job, too. I've been told for a month now that any day now, the "promotion" will be mine. My pay hasn't gone up. My authorization hasn't gone up. I'm still just doing the same thing I've always been doing, for not nearly enough money.

But my story is hardly unique, isn't it? Companies don't do anything unless they are forced to. Management doesn't care about the workers until they are made to care. But I'm isolated. There are three (3) total overnight auditors at this hotel with service for over 600 rooms. We should have at least 6 people doing this job. But we don't. Because we've gotten by without it for so long, the management seems to think it's going to be fine forever. I've told my direct boss, who is fine and who gets it (tm) because she was a front desk worker not long ago and deals with all the front line bullshit on a regular basis. She's been fighting for me. But management has never responded to any email I've ever sent. They've never corresponded. I've only ever seen the current front office manager twice. In five years. Once was on accident as I was leaving. The other time was when he had just started working here. I had been here for three years at that point. I've outlasted three rounds of management hiring and firing.

From what I can tell, though, this is how it is EVERYWHERE. Every time I talk with other hotel staff, or with other service workers, or hell, even with OFFICE workers, people are being over-extended. This goes well beyond burnout. I mean, I'm burnt out. I know I am. But I'm managing doing this job full time, while writing a PhD dissertation... and now managing gender dysphoria and beginning transition, too. It's all so much. Everything is just happening so fast, it feels like the world is accelerating so fast, and nothing will ever slow down, get easier, or get better.

I don't know of any person my age who has hope things will get better any time soon. Unless we all do something about it, nothing will get done. I tried a union, but the anti-union work is very real around here. Also, I work with max 3 other people a night. I don't see the bulk of the work force, so organizing isn't exactly something I'm primed to do. Not that "organizing" is a thing I'm at all good at anyways.

I just feel so fucking fried, so tired. I know part of it is my disability, but I also just know that this isn't how things are supposed to be, either. Nobody should have to do all the shit we have to deal with. Nobody should be paid pennies for working at a place you could never in a hundred years reasonably afford given our wages. Yet here we are. And the worst part? Management keeps finding new, stupider ways to scam people out of their money, which makes customers madder because they KNOW that they're being scammed--and take it out on the service workers!! As if we're in any position to do anything about the pricing that was decided by the upper levels of everything! As if we don't already know that the hotel is garbage, overpriced, and only this expensive because we're in a tourism town!

I work all the fucking time, to the point where I don't want to do anything on my days off because I need the time to recover. But recovery never comes. Just more anxiety, more worry, more work. And it seems never ending.

It shouldn't be like this. This cannot continue. But it will, until we have a broad and connected working class to push back against the powers that be. I know, I'm isolated, disenfranchised, and disenchanted intentionally, that's how capitalism works. But goddamn, each day feels like we're all squealing into the next on bald tires and broken brakes, but if we stop, we starve.

This cannot continue. It all has to burn, so we can build a better world in the ashes of the old.

[tvrningout-a]

SLAMS MY HANDS DOWN!! spoilers below for my pals who haven't seen a.tsv yet! we're talking about miguel, the disaster man himself!

if you're a personal blog, do not reblog this or i'm biting your ankles.

hello, hi, i've got some thoughts on miguel that'll probably be better supported once i read through his comics, but!! i've been thinking about miguel and the introduction of his character, how he says he doesn't always like what he has to do, but he knows he has to do it bc he's lost too much to stop. we find out he's talking about his daughter. from another dimension or not, he still loses her after forming an attachment to her, and this causes him to become our antagonist for more than one reason. but let's back up a lil bit.

when we first meet miguel, we see he can be quippy, funny -- he's still clearly not a happy-go-lucky kinda guy, but he doesn't appear quite as harsh as he is with miles. we even see him go against his original decision to leave gwen behind, even if it's at jessica's prompting. he's swayed bc he can't ignore her predicament, feels sympathy bc like her, there's some stuff he doesn't know how to fix either.

miguel knows she hasn't experienced all of her canon events bc her dad is police chief and alive. he knows she's close to miles. he knows she's a liability, but against his better judgement, he lets her join. he doesn't always like what he does, and sometimes he just can't do it. sometimes he's faced with the individual, and he can't follow through, leave someone behind to fend for themselves.

i think this is absolutely the case with his daughter gabriella. he found that universe where he was happy with a daughter, and initially he was just watching over what could have been. it was harmless if not painful at times. but then he's murdered in this other dimension, and he knows he should stay out of it. if he died, it was supposed to happen. but he can't leave it alone. he can't leave gabriella alone to fend for herself. so he takes a risk to save the individual -- he thinks about the person rather than the world.

and it ends up biting him in the ass. he loses gabriella and her world, singlehandedly ( so we assume at this point, at least ) causing their destruction by simply taking the place of that dimension's miguel and disrupting his canon death. he realizes then that he can't let himself prioritize the individual. he has to prioritize the world, no matter how much he'll hate it at times, because he'd rather feel guilt over a million uncle ben's than a million universes with billions of people in each one.

whereas miles has to learn in the first movie to focus saving on one person vs. the world, miguel has to learn the inverse, and it sucks. he doesn't always like what he does, but he knows he has to do it because either 1. nobody else will ( and he can't exactly blame them ) or 2. he can't ask anybody else to do it. " being spider-man is a sacrifice, " and he's already lost his daughter, seen first-hand what meddling in the canon leads to. he'll make the sacrifice of making those tough decisions if it means nobody else has to lose their dimension.

which is why things go so far off the frikkin rails with miles. i don't think miguel recruits spiders who haven't gone through certain losses ( with some exceptions like gwen and pav ) bc he knows it'll cause conflict when they find out they have to let certain people die. that's exactly what happens with miles, and bc he's the original anomaly, bc miguel and co. still don't know what might happen if he saves his dad, bc miguel is scared and can only think of the day he lost gabriella, he... chases down a teenager and gets waaaay too heated. he definitely projects some of his own guilt upon miles bc he wouldn't have ever known about gabriella's universe if not for all this anomaly business. he wouldn't have gotten her killed if he'd never needed to help put the multiverse back in order.

in the end, though, it's still miguel's own fault. he knew better, he knows better, and all he can do is try to stop miles.

[astro-rain]

delicate; b. barnes

chapter thirteen - “sober desires & the reminiscence of a winsome smile”

delicate masterlist

word count: 4k

synopsis: wakanda gets a visit from our favorite captain, two drinks is too much rum for a reticent psychologist, and bucky knows (& feels) more than meets the eye.

pairings: bucky x fem!reader

[A/N]: this took so long to write but WHEW this chapter!!!! pls let me know what you think >:D

The knock on the outside of his hut was followed by a deep accented voice, one that he had heard before.

"Sergeant Barnes?" it called.

Quickly enough Bucky was outside, facing the king of Wakanda himself. He wasn't sure exactly what to say. You see, the majority of their past interactions included the Black Panther trying to kill him. T'Challa was kind and Bucky trusted him. It was just... a little awkward given the history.

"Your highness," he greeted.

He smiled bashfully at the title.

"I have some news for you."

Bucky's head cocked to the side, curious. News? Should he be worried? He hadn't been expecting anything.

"Captain Rogers is on his way here. He was alerted about our recent complication with N'Jadaka," he said, referring to who Bucky guessed was who Y/N called Erik Killmonger, "and he asked to come check in, make sure you're okay."

Steve was coming. His mood was immediately uplifted. He hadn't seen his oldest friend for months. It was weird to have Steve feeling the need to make sure Bucky was okay; it was usually the other way around. Nonetheless, he was excited. And he had the sudden urge to tell Y/N.

- - -

READER

"Sharon. Hey," she said into the phone.

The friends hadn't spoken since Y/N left for Wakanda - security measures since Sharon helped Steve and betrayed the... well everyone.

"Y/N!" Sharon greeted. "How is everything? Are you alright?"

"Yeah, no I'm totally okay. The Killmonger thing was more the royal family's deal than mine. I was just hiding out in some bunker with Barnes."

Concerned weaved its way into Sharon's voice. "Oh my god. Did anything happen?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, historically, stress hasn't affected him well..."

She wasn't sure why she almost got offended. "No... he was completely fine. He doesn't lose control out of nowhere and turn into the winter soldier. It's a lot more complicated than that... We were fine."

"Oh, that's good. Listen... I'm actually on my way to Wakanda right now."

"You're-... what?"

"Steve needed to check in on Bucky after Killmonger. Wilson and I are coming too."

They must all be together. It makes sense considering what happened after the disaster in Berlin, and then the airport fiasco in Germany and then... everything in Siberia.

Aw, they're in hiding together, Y/N joked in her head. She almost laughed out loud.

"Oh. Is that safe? For you? For everyone?"

"I've been careful. We've all been careful. But, things don't always go as planned. And T'Challa feels bad about putting you guys in a dangerous situation when he was supposed to protect you."

"It wasn't his fault."

"I know. We all know. But, it's kind of his way of making up for it: letting us stay so that Steve can check in on Barnes and we can cool off for a bit."

"Was Rogers mad?"

"Well, he wasn't thrilled that his best friend was trapped alone in a country that just got taken over..."

He wasn't alone.

"...he was mostly worried," Sharon continued. "Still is."

"Right."

"Alright, well I got to go. We'll be there in a couple hours."

"I'll see you. Be safe."

"See you."

- - -

BUCKY BARNES

"Hey Buck," the happiness in Steve's voice was genuine as he patted his oldest friend on the back in the middle of an embrace. "How you been?"

"A hell of a lot better than the last time I saw you, that's for damn sure," Bucky smiled.

Sam Wilson stood next to the star spangled man with a plan. Bucky briefly glanced at him.

"Wilson," he deadpanned.

"Barnes," he returned the greeting.

"I was worried when T'Challa told me about Killmonger," Steve said. "Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful that they let you stay here, but I just didn't think I'd have to be worried so soon."

"It's alright. Everything turned out okay and I was fine the whole time. You don't have to lose your head."

"I'm not losing my head."

"You never had it in the first place."

The blonde changed the topic of conversation.

"You were with that therapist right?"

"Yeah."

"What do we think about her?" he asked with equal parts caution and suspicion. "Do you trust her?"

Bucky wasn't sure why he was almost offended.

"Of course. Why wouldn't I?"

"Well, you know what happened the last time you were with a psychiatrist..."

"Yeah well, this one doesn't have a personal vendetta against the Avengers."

"You sure she's alright?"

He looked serious, and Bucky could see the genuine concern etched into his friend's face. Steve was truly wary.

"I'm positive. She's helped so much since I've been here. I really trust her."

"Okay, if you say so. I trust you."

Bucky smirked. "Hey uh... is Sharon with you?"

Sam said nothing but radiated a smirk to match Bucky's perfectly, a kind of smirk that only a ball-busting best friend cracks.

"She is..." Steve replied. "Why do you ask?"

"Oh nothing. Just wondering, that's all."

"She said she wanted to talk to a friend."

"Oh, she's probably with Y/N."

"Who?"

"Y/N. Dr. Y/L/N. 'The therapist.'"

"I didn't know they were friends."

"Why do you think Sharon recommended her?"

"She said she knew 'the best' person to help."

"That true. She's crazy smart."

"As long as she can do the job, I'm all for it, no matter whose friend she is."

In a short-lived thought, Bucky wondered what Steve Rogers would think of who else Y/N was friends with. He wondered if Steve would think it was strange to be friends with your doctor, or if he'd be pleased that Bucky had gotten close to someone, anyone else in this world.

"How long are you guys staying for?" Bucky asked.

Steve rubbed the back of his neck anxiously. "Honestly, we were only planning on staying for like a week or so. We've been moving throughout Europe, and the other day, when we were in Prague... it was almost really bad."

"We need to stay low for a while," Sam added.

"What did you do?" Bucky asked, used to Steve getting himself into trouble.

"It's a long story..."

"What did T'Challa say about it?"

"He said to take as much time as we needed," Steve filled him in.

"You know, I'm startin' to really like this guy," Sam nodded, smiling. "Obviously when he went all cat murderer on you, he was a bit of a pain in the ass. But now? Guardian angel."

Bucky shook his head at Sam's nonsense. What an idiot, he thought. He wondered what Y/N would think of Sam, but then a more pressing question popped into his head.

"Where are you guys gonna stay?"

"I'm guessing there," Steve said pointing behind Bucky.

When he turned around, Bucky was shocked but he also wasn't. Behind and around his hut stood three more just like it, but slightly smaller. He could've sworn those weren't there yesterday, but that's the beauty of Wakanda. They were ten steps ahead of the rest of the world and he guessed that included speed building as well.

"I will never stop loving this place," he admired.

-

He tried not to sound too eager when he knocked on her door. She looked shocked but didn't really try to hide it.

"Oh," she sounded confused. "Hi, Bucky..."

"Hey," he grinned. "I have a proposition for you."

Her eyebrows lowered as her lips twisted into the most devilish smirk. She could communicate an entire joke with just her face.

"Not like that!" he exclaimed.

She laughed, smirk morphing into an endearing smile. "Like what then?"

"Steve wanted to have like a bonfire sorta thing to catch up since we're all together for once. You know, just like drinks and stupid stories from the forties. D'ya think you could part with your paper work to grace us with your presence?"

"Oh, uh... are you sure?"

"Of course. I'd love to have you there."

She wrung out her hands. "I don't know, Buck. Is that really appropriate? To have your doctor hangin' out with your friends?"

"That may be, but that's not what I'm asking. I want my friend to 'hang out' with my other friends."

Out of her composure seeped a meek smile. The air felt softer to him.

"And maybe you can analyze Wilson and tell me what his biggest fear is later," he added.

She snickered.

"Okay. Lead the way, James Buchanan."

-

The fire was a monster, roaring and crackling with all the life in the world. Bucky loved it. He loved the warmth, the heat, the lack of cold.

"I'm gonna get another drink," Y/N said. "You want anything, Buck?"

"I'm all set," he smiled, gaze lingering for only a second too long.

"Sharon?" she turned. "You?"

The blonde shook her head. "Oh, I think I've had plenty."

Surrounding the fire sat five chairs. All but one was empty as Y/N went to get her second drink. Of course they were in Sam's hut, Bucky thought. After all, even though it was Steve's idea, Sam was most excited about the whole thing, actually sitting down and just relaxing instead of fleeing from belligerent governments.

"Therapist's pretty," Sam noted with a smirk once she was out of hearing range.

"Y/N," Bucky corrected, mind going completely elsewhere. "She's so smart."

"Smart enough to call you Buck..." Steve said, catching on to Sam.

"What?"

"She calls you Buck."

"Yeah, so? You do too."

"Yeah, but I've known you longer. And I'm your friend."

"She's my friend too," he shrugged.

"She's your doctor..."

"And I'm a hundred year old man with one arm trying to get un-brainwashed in a country that the rest of the world doesn't even know exists. None of this is conventional."

"...fair," Steve said, with only a little bit of skepticism. "Are you guys close?"

Does spending hours alone talking with someone in a hidden bunker make you close? Does them comforting you after a nightmare and then subsequently allowing you to get the best night sleep you've had in forever? What about making daring voyages to quaint waterfalls and laughing a kind of laugh that makes your heart swell? What about-

"Buck?"

He shrugged. Again. "I guess so."

Sam narrowed his eyebrows. "How close?"

"Wilson," Sharon admonished exasperatedly. "Y/L/N's his doctor, come on. That's inappropriate to suggest."

Sam put his hands up in mock surrender. Briefly, just briefly, Bucky imagined kicking the leg of Sam's chair and watching him fall back. He didn't, obviously. But it would have been funny if he did.

The seemingly never ending conversation was cut short when Y/N returned, drink in hand, and took her seat next to Bucky.

"What'd you get?" he asked, demeanor subtly but swiftly changing into something lighter, something happier.

"I don't know, but it has rum in it," she shrugged sardonically before clinking her glass with Bucky's.

"Cheers," Sam raised his glass, trying to engage.

Y/N wordlessly, and with a half-smile, raised her glass in his direction.

"So," Steve started, comfortably crossing his legs and leaning back into his chair before asking Bucky, "you wanna know what actually happened in Prague?"

"Do enlighten me. I've been waiting all night."

"Jerk."

"Punk."

The rest of the night went on sort of like this. The group took turns telling stories and then listening. Cracking jokes and then laughing. Everyone but Y/N, Bucky noticed. She just... sat and drank, livelihood only extending to the borders of her seat.

He hadn't seen her like this before, and he found himself stuck halfway between confused and worried. Had something happened? Had something wrong been said?

He kept an eye on her as dusk melted into night. He told himself it was because he was concerned, but that was only in addition to the way he was magnetized to how she looked with the light of the fire gleaming on her skin.

After she would finish a drink, she'd stare into the fire for a little while, before leaving to get another. When he made sure no one was looking at him, he'd look at her. Discretely. At her eyes. The reflection of the fire in her pupils made him wonder if she would burn the fire before it could ever burn her. He was all too aware of the heat that accompanied her gaze. It was a ravishing burn that made him ache for the searing feeling as soon as it was taken away.

He didn't dare think of it for too long or else he would get distracted. And someone would call his name, pulling him out of a trance he didn't want to be caught in. A trance he wasn't sure he wanted to admit that he was in.

The night remained as such until someone - he couldn't remember who - said they were tired, and everyone bid their farewells, and wished their good nights.

Y/N spared about a side hug to Sharon before walking off on her own. Bucky half volunteered, half insisted on tending to the fire to make sure it went out, only to ignore it as soon as everyone was gone and follow after his psychologist.

He caught up to her as she was in the middle of opening the door to her living quarters.

"Y/N."

She turned around in the spot, door wide open, staring up at him.

He bore into her eyes, looking at something, noticing her dilated pupils and hazy stare.

"You're drunk," he said, but it sounded more like a question.

"Yeah."

"But you don't seem drunk?"

"I'm not wasted," she padded into the room, carelessly leaving the door wide open for him to walk through. "Just drunk enough to remember why I didn't drink in college."

She rubbed her eyes.

"Think I want another one," she sighed, heading for the door with a bitter smile. "More rum."

Bucky gently closed the door, maneuvering himself in front of it, and blocking her from exiting. Another drink is definitely not a good idea.

He changed the subject. "Why didn't you drink in college?"

Her eyebrows raised, introducing a look that said Really? You think I don't know what you're doing?

"Wow, look at you being the voice of reason for my otherwise inebriated brain."

Nevertheless, she cooperated.

She sighed. "It just... makes me miserable. I'm a sad drunk."

"Better than a mean drunk," he offered.

"Possibly. It's a real mood killer, though."

"That why you were off all night?"

"Off... ? I don't know, I guess so... I'm usually pretty inconspicuous when I'm drunk. Didn't think anyone would really notice."

There was no hesitation when he spoke.

"I did."

"I'm sorry..."

"Don't be sorry. Just... why did you keep drinking if it only makes you miserable?"

"Alcohol is a depressant," she breathed mechanically, as if speaking was difficult. "It depresses your nervous system, then you get disinhibited. Then you don't care about rationality and just drink! Then in the moment it feels kinda good... but then it makes you sad... and then you need more to blur the feeling away. It's like... the worse you feel, the more you need to drink... but then the more you drink... the worse you feel..."

"How are you drunk but still talking... sorta still like you usually do?"

She smirked, looking like she was trying not to laugh. He was glad she was smiling.

"Maybe you're not the only one with heightened metabolism as a result of the serum..."

He looked at her quizzically, amused. She wasn't making total sense, but he couldn't find it in himself to give much of a damn. She smiled, again.

"Kidding. I just have outstanding self-control."

She plopped down on the floor, deciding that she no longer wanted to use her legs. Fine motor function was overrated for intoxicated people.

He sat down with her, next to her.

"If I tell you a joke will you be less sad-drunk?"

"I already am 'less sad-drunk.' I wasn't before, but," she took a breath in, "now you're here, so... improvements have been made."

"That's good 'cause I was worried before."

She glanced up at him with brazen eye contact. Her face held a mixture of what looked like a confused and pained expression, as something changed. Some sort of realization or reality check.

She wiped her hands over her face. "God, this is so ridiculous. I'm sorry. You shouldn't be worried about me, that's not your job. I'm sorry. I should just go to bed, and you can leave..."

"I know it's not my job. I just wanted to make sure you were alright."

"I was alright- it... it's not like I was crying at the fire or something. I was fine."

"After your second drink, you were silent almost the entire time."

"You were counting my drinks?"

Not exactly.

"I was paying attention."

"To what?"

To you.

"You completely turned into yourself. Your elbows and legs were drawn in close to your body: unrelaxed and almost apprehensive posture. You were nonverbal, didn't make any jokes, no sarcastic commentary. I was literally purposefully saying things I knew you would correct or tease or laugh at and nothing. I was waiting for a 'smartass' or a 'there's a reason behind everything' explanation or anything science related. But there was nothing."

Her face was blank. It took her a second to catch up. Blinking slowly, she shook her head, eyebrows furrowed, all emphasis on the word. "Why?"

Her tone was truly confused. It was like she, in her heart of hearts, for the life of her, could not believe he was concerned.

"Y/N you're my friend," he chided. "Why wouldn't I be?"

She averted her gaze. Her voice was barely above a whisper. "I don't know."

"Look," his voice was soft. "I know you know everything and you know my mannerisms and micro-expressions and you know when I'm lying and whatever else 'cause you're a genius psychologist. But is it really that hard to believe that, after all the time we've known each other, I know you a little too? That I saw you for once instead of you always seein' me?"

"I think you're the only person who sees me."

The words leaked out before he thought to analyze them, tone lower than a whisper.

"Well I can't seem to look at much else."

He had never felt such potent silence. Did he just fuck up majorly? They just sat, on the floor, eyes glued to each other like twenty year old dried cement. He didn't think he could move away if he tried.

"I see you now," she whispered.

"What do you mean?"

"Blue," she breathed. "Your eyes are so blue. I don't... think I've ever seen that shade of blue."

It happened exponentially slowly, but the closer her face got to his, the more his chest felt like it was going to burst in the best way possible. As if liquid light poured into his lungs, inflating his chest and igniting every nerve with adoration.

Her lips hovered over his so lightly it was as if it wasn't even happening, like her affection was a ghost. But it was happening, and he could feel it. He could feel the softness in her lips and the smell of the rum she drank as they combined into the wondrous dual sensation that permeated throughout his brain.

They weren't kissing by any stretch. Their lips were hardly touching. However, in that moment, he was at her mercy. He was prepared to bend the laws of nature to her will if she would allow the continuation of this feeling for even a fraction of a second more.

Until it stopped and she waned away like the moon bidding adieu to the morning sky.

Her voice shook. "I'm so sorry."

"Don't... it's-"

"No. It's not okay. It's not okay."

He leaned back, examining her face. She looked confused and embarrassed and scared.

"Y/N, it's fine. It's okay, seriously, don't worry about it."

"I'm sorry, I'm... I'm drunk and I'm disinhibited and it's affecting my judgement and making me impulsive. I'm sorry."

He couldn't be exactly sure, but it sounded as if she was trying to convince herself more than she was trying to convince him.

Neither of them moved a muscle.

"Do you want me to leave?" he asked.

She was silent, frozen. It reminded him of a past conversation about the fight or flight response.

Bucky stood up and offered his hand to the woman sitting on the floor in front of him. "Here."

She took it gingerly and stood up with him before wide eyes stared into his apologetically.

"Please don't feel bad," he pleaded. "Barely anything happened."

"Still..."

"Why don't you just get some sleep and we can talk tomorrow. I promise it won't seem like such a big deal when you're sober."

She nodded but they both remained motionless, hands still together. He knew they needed to let go, but her hand didn't move, and she just kept looking into him.

"Okay," she whispered.

She walked him to the door, hand still in hand, and until he was forced to let go of her to open it. He stepped, ever so slowly, out of her room and onto the grass outside. He looked up at her, the doorway between them suddenly feeling like worlds of distance. They stood on opposite sides of the open door like statues. Bucky didn't know what to do and he wasn't sure what to say.

He settled on a, "Goodnight."

He tried not to make it sound so weak and timorous but he failed entirely. He didn't want to leave her like this. Guilty and alone. God knows he knew what it felt like.

Her voice was dry and quiet. "Goodnight."

He wasn't sure when the door shut or which one of them had shut it. The only thing he was sure of was the feeling of formidable regret pooling in his stomach.

On one hand, there was regret for letting her lean in and get so close because now he was scared that their dynamic was ruined and worried that Y/N felt awful. On the other hand, there was regret that he just let her pull away. Regret that he didn't lean in more and shamelessly drown in her. Regret that he didn't unapologetically suffocate himself with the softness of lips, the inebriating smell of rum on on her tongue, and the utterly bewitching taste of her he was sure would follow.

He wasn't sure what he felt, to be honest. He was a muddle of emotions of which he had no idea how to sift through. Momentarily, he wished he was drunk so he wouldn't have to think so hard. Then, he remembered the saying, "drunk words are sober thoughts," and he was damn glad he was stone cold sober; he could only imagine the things he would say to her if he was drunk.

This lead him to pondering, it got the gears in his brain turning. It made him wonder. Maybe... just maybe... if drunk words were sober thoughts, then what if drunk actions were sober desires?

Thinking like this could cause him read the situation completely differently. Thinking like this could make him read the situation in such a way that conceived the slightest sliver of hope for emotions gone repressed. Hope is dangerous...

Hope is dangerous, so Bucky shoved it down into the deepest cavern of his brain, the very same cavern where his feelings for her resided. It was a monster in a cave, growling and hissing menacingly. Intensely.

It scared him, this intensity. It scared him so much that the only way he could fall asleep was by thinking about the way James Buchanan sounded when she said it with a winsome smile.

delicate taglist: ​@bakugouswh0r3 @thefridgeismybestie @strivingforelegance @ilovespideyyy @xpurpleglitter @bluelakeee @darkacademic2 @nickkie1129 @eclipsedplanet @paradisedixon @crazy-beautiful @coffee--writes @lilithknight1111 @buckybarnesishot310 @softladyhours @alwayssandy @quxxnxfhxll @those-sea-green-eyes @hero-ically @devilswaldorf

[between-the-pages-ofa-book]

The newest argument that I've seen lately that bothers me enough to make a post about is that the MCU is taking competent teenagers from the comics and making them incompetent so that an adult hero can take them under their wing and save the day. The first this argument was made for was Peter and then a few weeks ago, I saw that it was made about America.

I'll do America first since I have less to say about her:

America Chavez is a 15-16 year old girl who has been living on her own for approximately 8 years. She, by her own account, has travelled to 73 universes and survived them all. She may not be able to control her powers but if she was incompetent, like these arguments make her out to be, she would've have survived. In the end, she does gain control of her powers and she is the one who saves the day in the movie about Doctor Strange. Stephen even makes it a point that "this whole time, you've taken us exactly where we needed to go." Her meeting Stephen was chance and while he did protect her and make sure she lived long enough to get to that point, her saving the day was all on her. Stephen didn't tell her how to open the portal to the other world, she figured that out on her own.

Now, onto the hill I will die on: In what world is Peter Parker shown to be incompetent?

The argument is that Peter relies too much on adults--Tony then Mysterio then Strange--to save the day when that is simply not true.

Let's go back to Captain America: Civil War. Tony seeks Peter out because the spider kid is saving the day and he's impressed. Tony recruits Peter because of his abilities and his skills. Peter then goes on to hold his own against a team made up of 2 super soldiers, a trained soldier in a flying suit, the world's top marksman, a witch, and a man who can shrink or grow in size depending on what he needs at the time. Sure, our understanding is that Tony knew that Peter wouldn't have gotten hurt because none of that team would have hurt a kid but the point is that he still held his own and managed to beat 2 of this team. He even devises the plan to get Giant Man down.

Then we have Homecoming. Yes, he has the fancy suit that Tony made for him but the entire point of this movie is to show that Peter is more than the suit. Peter fights against Vulture and even has a building fall on him and has to get up. Peter did that all on his own. Peter saved the day without Tony.

Next is Avengers Infinity War and Endgame. Peter sees the action from the school bus and joins in. Peter then manages to stow away to space. Once again, we see Peter coming up with the plan to save Strange. Peter is an active part of this movie and helps to try to save the day. Yes, he has the Iron Spider suit to keep him from dying from not being able to breathe in space but once he's there, he doesn't necessarily need it. It's just an added bonus. When he comes back after the Blip, Peter is the one who keeps the gauntlet for a good bit of that fight. Yeah, he has help from Steve and the group of women along the way but Endgame was a team effort.

Next, we have Far From Home, the first movie directly dealing with the aftermath of the Blip and we see Peter grieving for Tony. All Peter wants to do is go on a field trip and ask out MJ. He doesn't want to do any superheroing because he's 16 and hasn't had a good time of it lately. Fury shows up and gives him orders, the same way he would have if that was Captain America or Black Widow or Hawkeye standing there. People argue that Peter turned to Mysterio as another sort of father figure, when in fact, it was Mysterio who sought out Peter because of EDITH and ended up using him. This entire movie was Peter needing to learn to trust his instincts rather than relying on the tech that he was given. In the end, it's Peter's own spidey-sense and instincts that saves him.

No Way Home is the movie that existed to break Peter down so we could see what he's made of. Peter sought Strange out to help with college not for himself but for MJ and Ned because it wasn't fair to them that they couldn't get into their dream school because of their association with him. Stephen felt bad for the kid and did the spell but he didn't have as big of a role in this film as everyone thinks he did. Sure, I joke about him adopting Peter but Stephen was really more of a plot device to bring in Raimi Peter and TASM Peter and their villains to our world. This movie existed to remind us that Peter is a good hearted, kind, superheroic person. It's why he wanted to help "fix" the villains and send them home rather than letting them go back home to die. Even after one of them directly kills Aunt May, he continues wanting to help them. He almost kills Green Goblin out of rage and grief but the older version of him stops him and we see Peter go onto make the ultimate sacrifice of letting the world forget about him to stop the rest of the spiderverse villains from coming through. It's Peter who saves the day, not Stephen, and while he had help from the older versions of himself, they didn't save the day either--Peter did. We even see that at the end of the movie, Peter is managing to be smiling and surviving. He's making it. He made his own suit since he no longer has the Stark tech to use. He's still going out and being our friendly neighborhood spiderman that we all know and love. And he did this on his own. Peter may have gotten help along the way but his own movies thus far have existed to show that he is competent on his own.

My question is: Why is it so bad for the teenagers to get help from the older, theoretically more responsible adults?

[angelshizuka]

For send me a character, can you do Sora (KH) and Kairi?

Send me a character and I’ll list:

Sora

Favorite thing about them: I'm weak for genuinely positive, supportive and kind characters, who hide a more fragile side. I love it when Sora snaps, he might be nice, but he's done with being pushed over (beware the nice ones, they snap the hardest).

Least favorite thing about them: How much he used to undervalue Kairi (telling her she'd just get in the way), but he finally learned from that in KH3.

Favorite line: “My whole journey began the day I lost her. And every time I find her… she slips away again. I thought we’d finally be together. But she’s out there, alone. Not for one more second.“

BROTP: Donald Duck, Goofy

OTP: Kairi

NOTP: Riku

Random headcanon: It wouldn't suprise me at all if he has ADHD. He has so much energy and trouble keeping his attention (though in that same breath, can also hyperfocus on things).

Unpopular opinion: I actually love his romance with Kairi. Especially if you consider romance isn't the main focus of this franchise and more of a side thing, it's really not as badly written as people claim it is.

Song I associate with them: A Thousand Years - Christina Perri

Favorite picture of them: I will never get over this.

Kairi

Favorite thing about them: Everything. How imperfect she is. She has such a big, pure heart and tries so hard to help and "do better", but it constantly blows up in her face, because the bad guys keep picking her as a target (imagine victim blaming someone for choices the bad guys make... couldn't be me). It makes her human and interesting.

Least favorite thing about them: Her writing. But honestly, in a franchise like this where writing isn't one of it's strong points... I can't really blame her for it.

Favorite line: "Thinking of you, wherever you are. We pray for our sorrows to end, and hope that our hearts will blend. Now I will step forward to realize this wish. And who knows: starting a new journey may not be so hard or maybe it has already begun. There are many worlds, but they share the same sky- one sky, one destiny."

BROTP: Namine, Riku, Axel, Aqua

OTP: Sora

NOTP: Where do I start...

Random headcanon: She suffers from depression, but tries to smile through it. And she hasn't really gotten a chance to work on recovering from it, since life keeps throwing shit at her.

Unpopular opinion: Kairi being a "damsel in distress" who struggles with being "useful" makes her 100 times more interesting than most KH characterst (I said what I said). And people need to seriously stop acting like physical strength and being a good fighter are the only ways to be "strong".

Song I associate with them: A Thousand Years - Christina Perri

Favorite picture of them: I love too many, so have a random one.

I kinda turned this whole thing into Sokai, but that's what happens when you put both of them in the same ask... And this ship is literally my fave thing in this entire franchise, so I don't even care.

[bi-bard]

Picture Perfect - Winchester Brothers Imagine (Supernatural)

Title: Picture Perfect

Pairing: Winchester Brothers X Child!Reader

Requested: by @isatkj

Word Count: 1,356 words

Warning(s): mentions of death, potential violence.

Summary: (Around Season 8 or 9-ish) The perfect town... that wasn't supposed to exist. Now, Sam and Dean have to figure out what caused this city to suddenly pop up on the map.

Author's Note: I took so much inspiration from season 14, episode 15 because of the general vibe of the whole episode.

Hey! I did a rewrite of the ending of Supernatural. It took a really long time to complete, so it would mean a lot to me if you check it out. Here’s a link! (it’s on my personal account)

-----------------------------------

--Third P.O.V--

Dean pulled the impala up to an open gas pump. While his brother got the gas, Sam opened the passenger door so he could go over the facts.

"So, there have been strange occurrences around a small town about three hours outside of Seattle, Washington," Sam relayed. "Insiders rarely come out and the outsiders that go in don't usually get back out."

"No one's making a huge deal about this," Dean asked.

"Well, it's supposed to be an old ghost town," Sam explained. "But it's not. Functioning stores and living families."

"So, something has got this town up and running but the people in it are... what performing sacrifices," Dean asked.

"I don't know," Sam shrugged.

"How far out are we," Dean asked.

"A few more hours," Sam replied.

"Hold on boys," the brothers looked over to see Death standing in front of the car. "I have some information you need about this little town."

"And that is...," Sam asked after Death had trailed off.

"You shouldn't go in," the being replied. "The person running that town is incredibly dangerous. You'll be dead in moments. The residents won't let you get close enough to harm the child."

"The child," Dean noted.

"The child is raising the dead," Death continued. "This upsets the natural balance of things. The source must be removed."

"'The source' is a child," Sam argued. "You can't just kill a child."

"I can, and I will," Death just seemed to shrug.

"Do you know why this kid wants to bring people back," Dean asked. "Before you become an asshole and murder someone who hasn't even gotten to middle school?"

"Almost a year ago, the child lost both of their parents," Death explained. "That's when their powers first spiraled. It started with only their parents. It then spread, like a virus. Soon, a whole town was standing in a spot where there should be rubble."

"You're going to kill a kid that lost their family," Sam asked.

The brothers stared at Death in shock. Death seemed annoyingly unaffected. To him, this was the only way to put things back in order. To the boys, this was a clearly scared kid that went through the same pain that they did.

"You can't do this," Dean shook his head. "We won't let you."

"You don't have a choice-"

"Give us a chance," Sam snapped. "It's a kid. A scared kid. Give us a chance to talk to them. Just a chance."

"No."

"Come on!"

"I'll give you one chance," Death replied. "If you fail, I will finish the job."

As the word "job" was spoken, Death vanished from the boys' sight.

Sam and Dean jumped back into the impala and took off. What was supposed to be another three-hour drive was done in a little over two. Neither brother knew how they didn't get pulled over but they didn't care.

Dean pulled the car over to the curb.

"Woah," Dean mumbled as they got out.

It was the picture-perfect town. There was a small dinner, a library that was actually being used, cookie-cutter houses. Sam and Dean looked at each other.

Locals were looking at them as the brothers walked by.

"So, where do we find this kid," Dean asked.

"Well, look at the signs," Sam pointed at the businesses. Most of them had (Y/l/n) on their signs. "It's the most common name. If we can find that house, we can find the kid."

Everyone's house had little signs. It was very clear this town was designed by a child.

"Well, hello," a man walked up to the brothers.

"Hi," Dean said awkwardly.

"Can I ask why you boys have decided to visit our little town," the man asked.

The boys looked at each other for a moment.

"We were admiring the lovely houses," Sam lied. "We have been considering moving for a while and this town seems lovely."

"Well, there aren't any vacancies," the man replied.

"Oh, that's a shame," Sam shrugged. "Is there someone else we can talk to? A mayor or something? I don't want to insult you but maybe you missed something."

The man's smile dropped, "You can't go near them."

"Why," Dean asked.

"You'll hurt them," the man glared.

It was like that was a signal. All of the people on the street stopped, turning to stare at the brothers. The brothers looked all around them.

"We're not going to hurt them," Sam tried to explain. "We're trying to help."

"No," the man snapped. "You're trying to take us away."

When the man stepped forward, the brothers knew it was time to run. They sprinted down the street as almost a whole town chased them.

"Sam," Dean yelled, pointing at a house. "There, look at the sign!"

"(Y/l/n)'s house!" was written on the sign.

The brothers ran through the front door, locking it. No one banged on the door.

"They don't want to hurt (Y/n)," Sam said. "We should be safe here."

"Hello there," a man and woman walked out to see the brothers.

"The parents," Sam mumbled.

They looked up to the stairs when the floor creaked. There was a young kid standing up there.

"Hi, (Y/n)," Sam said softly, trying to keep from scaring the kid. "I'm Sam, this is my brother, Dean. We're here to help."

"Why," the kid asked. "I'm happy here. Everything was fixed."

"Do you know why," Sam asked. The child seemed confused at the idea that something caused this. "You brought them back, remember?"

"Don't," the dad said in anger. "You don't get to hurt (Y/n)."

"Sam," Dean mumbled.

One more shared look and the two took off. They ran up the stairs, the undead parents on their tails.

"I'm sorry," Sam mumbled, leading (Y/n) back into their room. Dean slammed the door, locking it and being ready to hold it shut.

"What are you doing," (Y/n) went to fight Sam, but obviously didn't get far.

"(Y/n)," Sam knelt down and grabbed (Y/n)'s shoulders. "You created this town. Your parents died and your powers went out of control. No one here is supposed to be alive."

"You're... You're lying," the child yelled, shaking her head. Dean leaned into the door when (Y/n)'s parents started banging on it.

"I know it's hard," Sam continued. "It's terrifying but you aren't going to be completely alone. Right now, you're putting yourself in danger. That's not good, is it?"

(Y/n) shook their head.

"I lost both my parents too," Sam said. "It's scary but you have to let these people go. They have to move on. I promise, they'll be much happier."

"I don't wanna be alone," the kid mumbled, tears falling down their face.

"You won't be," Sam promised. "Dean and I will make sure of that."

The banging stopped. Dean stood up straight again.

The cookie-cutter house faded. Instead of falling from the second floor like they should have, they were just on the ground by an old building, already crumbled and destroyed.

Sam pulled (Y/n) into a tight hug as the kid sobbed. Dean walked over to them. He and Sam shared a sad look. Sam slowly stood up, letting the kid hold his hand as they walked to the impala.

Death was waiting for them.

The brothers froze, Sam pushing (Y/n) behind him.

"Good job boys," Death complimented. "However, there's still a problem. The child doesn't have control over their powers."

"We can teach them," Dean argued. "We have enough experience with powers that we can help."

Death took a step forward.

Both the boys moved to be more in his way.

"Fine," Death stared at (Y/n), who was still hiding behind Sam. "I'll have my eye on you."

With that, Death disappeared again. (Y/n) stepped out from behind Sam.

"He's not very nice," the kid mumbled. The brothers couldn't help but chuckle. Understatement of the century.

"Come on, kid," Dean nodded toward the car. "Let's make sure we have a comfortable place for you to sleep for the night."

The boys didn't expect to leave the town with a kid but it definitely wasn't the weirdest hunt they had been on.

-----------------------------------

Masterlist

What I Write For

Request Guidelines

Musical Prompts

Small Moments With…

When Worlds Collide (Doctor Who Crossover Series) Masterlist

Some Original Characters

folklore/evermore Writing Challenge (and Masterlist)

[sk1fanfiction]

the many faces of tom riddle, part 4

-attachment, orphanages, and yet more child psych: time to add yet another voice to the void-

FULL DISCLAIMER THAT THIS IS JUST MY OPINION OF A CHARACTER WHO DOESN’T HAVE THE STRONGEST CANON CHARACTERIZATION, AND THUS ALL THIS IS BASED ON MY CONCEPTUALIZATION.

I'm going to be super biased, because my favorite portrayal of Tom Riddle is actually Hero Fiennes-Tiffin as eleven-year-old Tom Riddle, in HBP and I get to chat about child psych in this one, sooo here we go.

First of all, I’m just so impressed that a kid could bring that much depth to such a complex character.

This is the portrayal, I feel, that brings us closest to Tom’s character. Yes, Coulson’s brought us pretty close, but by fifth year, the mask was on.

We don't really get to see Tom looking afraid very often, but it's fear that rules his life, so it's really poignant in our first (chronologically) introduction, he looks absolutely terrified.

The void being the fandom's loud opinions on a certain headmaster. I wouldn't call myself pro-Dumbledore, but I'm certainly not anti-Dumbledore, either. (Agnostic-Dumbledore??)

Since I'm not of the anti-Dumbledore persuasion, I decided to poke around in the tags and see what the arguments were, so I don't make comments out of ignorance.

Most of the tag seems to be more directed towards his treatment of Harry and Sirius, but a few people mentioned that Dumbledore should have treated Tom with ‘exceptional kindness’ and tried to ‘rehabilitate’ him.

As I said in Parts 2 and 3, I am 100% in favor of helping a traumatized kid learn to cope, and I don’t think Tom Riddle was solidly on the Path to Evil (TM) at birth, or even at eleven. Not even at fifteen.

Could unconditional love and kindness have helped Tom Riddle enough for the rise of Lord Voldemort to never happen? Possibly, but...

Yes, I'm about to drag up that Carl Jung quote, again.

“I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.”

The problem with this is that if you’re going to blame Dumbledore for this, you also have to blame every other adult in Tom’s life: his headmaster, Dippet, his Head of House, Slughorn, his ‘caretakers’ at the orphanage, Mrs. Cole and Martha, and possibly more. In fact, if we're going to blame any adult, let's blame Merope for r*ping and abusing Tom Riddle Senior, and having a kid she wasn't intending to take care of.

Furthermore, you cannot possibly hold anyone but Tom accountable for the murders he committed. (I should not have to sit here and explain why cold-blooded murder is wrong.) And if you like Tom Riddle's character, insinuating that his actions are completely at the whim of others is just a bit condescending towards him. He's not an automaton or a marionette, he's a very intelligent human being with a functioning brain, and at sixteen is fully capable of moral reasoning and critical analysis.

I've heard the theories about Dumbledore setting the Potters up to die, and I'm not going to discuss their validity right now; but he didn't put a wand in Tom's hand and force him to kill anyone. Tom did it all of his own accord.

And while yes, I have enormous sympathy for what happened to Tom as a child, at some point, he decided to murder Myrtle Warren, and that is where I lose my sympathy. Experiencing trauma does not give you the right to inflict harm on others. Yes, Tom was failed, but then, he spectacularly failed himself.

We also have no idea how Dumbledore treated Tom as a student.

In the movies, it’s Dumbledore who tells Tom he has to go back to the orphanage, but in the books, it’s Dippet. We know that Slughorn spent a lot of time around Tom at Slug Club and such, yet I don’t really see people clamoring for his head.

I regard the sentiment that Dumbledore turned Tom Riddle into Lord Voldemort with a lot of skepticism.

But let's hear from the character himself -- his impression of eleven-year-old Tom Riddle.

“Did I know that I had just met the most dangerous Dark wizard of all time?” said Dumbledore. “No, I had no idea that he was to grow up to be what he is. However, I was certainly intrigued by him. I returned to Hogwarts intending to keep an eye upon him, something I should have done in any case, given that he was alone and friendless, but which, already, I felt I ought to do for others’ sake as much as his."

Now, assuming that Dumbledore's telling the truth, I'm not seeing something glaringly wrong with this. No, he hasn't pigeonholed Tom as evil, yes, I'd be intrigued, too, and it's a very good idea to keep an eye on Tom, for his own sake.

“At Hogwarts,” Dumbledore went on, “we teach you not only to use magic, but to control it. You have — inadvertently, I am sure — been using your powers in a way that is neither taught nor tolerated at our school."

Again, it seems like he's at least somewhat sympathetic towards Tom, and is willing to at least give him a chance.

More evidence (again, assuming Dumbledore is a reliable narrator):

Harry: “Didn’t you tell them [the other professors], sir, what he’d been like when you met him at the orphanage?” Dumbledore: “No, I did not. Though he had shown no hint of remorse, it was possible that he felt sorry for how he had behaved before and was resolved to turn over a fresh leaf. I chose to give him that chance.”

Now, I think Dumbledore is pretty awful with kids, but I don't think that's malicious. Yeah, it's a flaw, but perfect people don't exist, and perfect characters are dead boring. I am not saying that he definitely handled Tom's case well, I'm just saying that there's little evidence that Dumbledore, however shaken and scandalized, wrote him off as 'evil snake boy.'

It's also worth taking into account that it's 1938, and the attitudes towards mental health back then.

Why is Tom looking at Dumbledore like that, anyway? Why is he so scared? What has he possibly been threatened with or heard whispers of?

"'Professor'?" repeated Riddle. He looked wary. "Is that like 'doctor'? What are you here for? Did she get you in to have a look at me?"

"I don't believe you," said Riddle. "She wants me looked at, doesn't she? Tell the truth!"

"You can't kid me! The asylum, that's where you're from, isn't it? 'Professor,' yes, of course -- well, I'm not going, see? That old cat's the one who should be in the asylum. I never did anything to little Amy Benson or Dennis Bishop, and you can ask them, they'll tell you!

Tom keeps insisting he's not mad until Dumbledore finally manages to calm him down.

I'm really upset this wasn't in the movie, because it's important context. Instead we got these throwaway cutscenes of some knick-knacks relating to the Cave he's got lying around, but I just would have preferred to see him freaking out like he does in the book.

There was extreme stigma and prejudice towards mental illness.

'Lunatic asylums,' as they were called in Tom's time, were terrible places. In the 1930s and 40s, he could look forward to being 'treated' with induced convulsions, via metrazol, insulin, electroshock, and malaria injections. And if he stuck around long enough, he could even look forward to a lobotomy!

So, if you think Dumbledore was judgmental towards Tom, imagine how flat-out prejudiced whatever doctors or 'experts' Mrs. Cole might have gotten in to 'look at him' must have been!

Moving on to the next few shots, he is sitting down and hunched over as if expecting punishment or at least some kind of bad news, Dumbledore is mostly out of the frame. He’s trapped visually, by Dumbledore on one side, and a wall on the other, because he’s still very much afraid. uncomfortable, as he tells Dumbledore a secret that he fears could get him committed to an asylum (which were fucking horrible places, as I said).

It brings to the scene that miserable sense of isolation and loneliness to that has defined Tom’s entire life up to that point (and, partially due to his own bad choices, continues to define it).

And, when Dumbledore accepts it, his posture changes. he becomes more confident and more at ease, as he describes the... utilities of his magical abilities. 

"All sorts," breathed Riddle. A flush of excitement was rising up his neck into his hollow cheeks; he looked fevered. "I can make things move without touching them. I can make animals do what I want them to do, without training them. I can make bad things happen to people who annoy me. I can make them hurt if I want to."

Riddle lifted his head. His face was transfigured: There was a wild happiness upon it, yet for some reason it did not make him better looking; on the contrary, his finely carved features seemed somehow rougher, his expression almost bestial.

I do think Harry, our narrator, is being a tad bit judgmental here. Magic is probably the only thing that brings Tom happiness in his grey, lonely world, and when I was Tom's age and being bullied, if I had magic powers, you'd better believe that I'd (a) be bloody ecstatic about it (b) use them. And, like Tom, I can't honestly say that I can't imagine getting a bit carried-away with it. Unfortunately, we can't all be as inherently good and kindhearted as Harry.

Reading HBP again, as a 'mature' person, it almost seems like the reader is being prompted to see Tom as evil just because he's got 'weird' facial expressions.

So... uh...

Nope, let's judge Tom on his actions, not looks of 'wild happiness.'

To his great surprise, however, Dumbledore drew his wand from an inside pocket of his suit jacket, pointed it at the shabby wardrobe in the corner, and gave the wand a casual flick. The wardrobe burst into flames. Riddle jumped to his feet; Harry could hardly blame him for howling in shock and rage; all his worldly possessions must be in there. But even as Riddle rounded on Dumbledore, the flames vanished, leaving the wardrobe completely undamaged.

Okay, one thing I dislike is Tom's lack of emotional affect when Dumbledore burned the wardrobe, in the books, he jumped up and started screaming, instead of looking passively (in shock, perhaps?) at the fire. Incidentally, I can't really tell if he's impressed or in shock, to be honest. I think they really tried to make Tom 'creepier' in the movie.

This is one of the incidents where Dumbledore's inability to deal with children crops up.

I think he was trying to teach Tom that magic can be dangerous, and he wouldn't like it to be used against him, but burning the wardrobe that contains everything he owns was a terrible move on Dumbledore's part. Tom already has very limited trust in other people, and now, he's not going to trust Dumbledore at all -- now, he's put Tom on the defensive/offensive for the rest of their interaction, and perhaps for the rest of their teacher-student relationship.

Riddle stared from the wardrobe to Dumbledore; then, his expression greedy, he pointed at the wand. "Where can I get one of them?"

"Where do you buy spellbooks?" interrupted Riddle, who had taken the heavy money bag without thanking Dumbledore, and was now examining a fat gold Galleon.

But I'm not surprised Tom is 'greedy.' He's grown up in an environment where if he wants something, whether that's affection, food, money, toys, he's got to take it. There's no one looking after his needs specifically. I'm not surprised that he's a thief and a hoarder, and I don't think that counts as a moral failing necessarily, and more of a maladaptive way of seeking comfort. It would be bizarre if he came out of Wool's Orphanage a complete saint.

Additionally, I think given that the Gaunt family has a history of 'mental instability,' Tom is a sensitive child, and the trauma of growing up institutionalized and possibly being treated badly due to his magical abilities or personality disorder deeply affected him.

And there are points where it seems that Dumbledore is quick to judge Tom.

"He was already using magic against other people, to frighten, to punish, to control."

"Yes, indeed; a rare ability, and one supposedly connected with the Dark Arts, although as we know, there are Parselmouths among the great and the good too. In fact, his ability to speak to serpents did not make me nearly as uneasy as his obvious instincts for cruelty, secrecy, and domination."

"I trust that you also noticed that Tom Riddle was already highly self-sufficient, secretive, and, apparently, friendless?..."

And while this is all empirically true, these are (a) a product of Tom's harsh environment, and (b) do not necessarily make him evil. But the point remains that child psych didn't exist as a field of its own, and psychology as a proper science was in its infancy, so I'd be shocked if Dumbledore was insightful about Tom's situation.

But I've gone a ton of paragraphs without citing anything, so I've got to rectify that.

Let's talk about Harry Harlow's monkey experiments in the 1950-70s.

If you're not a fan of animal research, since I know some people are uncomfortable with it, feel free to scroll past.

Here's the TL;DR: Children need to be hugged and shown affection too, not just fed and clothed, please don't leave babies to 'cry out' and ignore their needs because it's backwards and fucking inhumane. HUG AND COMFORT AND CODDLE CHILDREN AND SPOIL THEM WITH AFFECTION!

I will put more red writing when the section is over.

This is still an interesting experiment to have in mind while we explore the whole 'no one taught Tom Riddle how to love' thing and whether or not it's actually a good argument.

Andddd let's go all the way back to the initial 1958 experiment, featured in Harlow's paper, the Nature of Love. (If you're familiar with Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, him and Harlow actually collaborated for a time).

To give you an idea of our starting point, until Harlow's experiment, which happened twenty years after Dumbledore meets Tom for the first time, no one in science had really been interested in studying love and affection.

"Psychologists, at least psychologists who write textbooks, not only show no interest in the origin and development of love or affection, but they seem to be unaware of its very existence."

I'm going to link some videos of Harry Harlow showing the actual experiment, which animal rights activists would probably consider 'horrifying.' It's nothing gory or anything, but if you are particularly soft-hearted (and I do not mean that as an insult), be warned. It's mostly just baby monkeys being very upset and Harlow discussing it in a callous manner. Yes, today it would be considered unethical, but it's still incredibly important work and if you think you can handle it, I would recommend watching at least the first one to get an idea of how dramatic this effect is.

Dependency when frightened

The full experiment

The TL;DW:

This experiment was conducted with rhesus macaques; they're still used in psychology/neuroscience research when you want very human-like subjects, because they are very intelligent (unnervingly so, actually). I'd say that adult ones remind me of a three-year old child.

Harlow separated newborn monkeys from their mothers, and cared for their physical needs. They had ample nutrition, bedding, warmth, et cetera. However, the researchers noticed that the monkeys:

(a) were absolutely miserable. And not just that, but although all their physical needs were taken care of, they weren't surviving well past the first few days of life. (This has also been documented in human babies, and it's called failure to thrive and I'll talk about it a bit later).

(b) showed a strong attachment to the gauze pads used to cover the floor, and decided to investigate.

So, they decided to provide a surrogate 'mother.' Two, actually. Mother #1 was basically a heated fuzzy doll that was nice for the monkeys to cuddle with. Mother #2 was the same, but not fuzzy and made of wire. Both provided milk. The result? The monkeys spent all their time cuddling and feeding from the fuzzy 'mother.' Perhaps not surprising.

What Harlow decided next, is that one of the hallmarks being attached to your caregiver is seeking hugs and reassurance from them when frightened. So, when the monkeys were presented with something scary, they'd go straight to the cloth mother and ignore the wire one. Not only that, but when placed in an unfamiliar environment, if the cloth mother was present, the monkeys would be much calmer.

In a follow-up experiment, Harlow decided to see if there was some sort of sensitive period by introducing both 'mothers' to monkeys who had been raised in isolation for 250 days. Guess what?

The initial reaction of the monkeys to the alterations was one of extreme disturbance. All the infants screamed violently and made repeated attempts to escape the cage whenever the door was opened. They kept a maximum distance from the mother surrogates and exhibited a considerable amount of rocking and crouching behavior, indicative of emotionality.

Yikes. So, at first Harlow thought that they'd passed some kind of sensitive period for socialization. But after a day or two they calmed down and started chilling out with the cloth mother like the other monkeys did. But here's a weird thing:

That the control monkeys develop affection or love for the cloth mother when she is introduced into the cage at 250 days of age cannot be questioned. There is every reason to believe, however, that this interval of delay depresses the intensity of the affectional response below that of the infant monkeys that were surrogate-mothered from birth onward

All these things... attachment, affection, love, seeking comfort ... are mostly learned behaviours.

Over.

Orphanages, institutionalized childcare, and why affection is a need, not an extra.

His face is lit the exact same was as Coulson’s was in COS (half-light, half-dark), and I said I was going to talk about this in Part 3. I think perhaps it's intended to make Fiennes-Tiffin look more evil or menacing, but I'm going to quite deliberately misinterpret it.

Now, for some context, Dumbledore has just (kind of) burned his wardrobe, ratted out his stealing habit, and (in the books only, they really took a pair of scissors to this scene) told him he needs to go apologize and return everything and Dumbledore will know if he doesn't, and, well, Tom's not exactly a happy bugger about it.

But interestingly, in the books, this is when we start to see Tom's 'persona,' aka his mask, start to come into play. Whereas before, he was screaming, howling, and generally freaking out, here, he starts to hide his emotions -- in essence, obscure his true self under a shadow. So this scene is really the reverse of Coulson's in COS.

And perhaps I'm reading wayyy too much into this, but I can't help but notice that Coulson's hair is parted opposite to Fiennes-Tiffin's, and the opposite sides of their faces are shadowed, too.

Riddle threw Dumbledore a long, clear, calculating look. "Yes, I suppose so, sir," he said finally, in an expressionless voice.

Riddle did not look remotely abashed; he was still staring coldly and appraisingly at Dumbledore. At last he said in a colorless voice, "Yes, sir."

Here's an article from The Atlantic on Romanian orphanages in the 1980s, when the dictator, Ceausescu, basically forced people to have as many children as possible and funnel them into institutionalized 'childcare', and it's absolutely heartbreaking.

There's not a whole lot of information out there on British orphanages in the 30s' and 40s', but given that people back then thought you just had to keep children on a strict schedule and feed them, it wouldn't have a whole lot better.

The only thing I've found is this, and it's not super promising.

The most important study informing the criteria for contemporary nosologies, was a study by Barbara Tizard and her colleagues of young children being raised in residential nurseries in London (Tizard, 1977). These nurseries had lower child to caregiver ratios than many previous studies of institutionalized children. Also, the children were raised in mixed aged groups and had adequate books and toys available. Nevertheless, caregivers were explicitly discouraged from forming attachments to the children in their care.

Here's a fairly recent paper that I think gives a good summary: Link

Here, they describe the responses to the Strange Situation test (which tests a child's attachment to their caregiver).

We found that 100% of the community sample received a score of “5,” indicating fully formed attachments, whereas only 3% of the infants living in institutions demonstrated fully formed attachments. The remaining 97% showed absent, incomplete, or odd and abnormal attachment behaviors.

Bowlby and Ainsworth, who did the initial study, thought that children would always attach to their caregivers, regardless of neglect or abuse. But some infants don't attach (discussed along with RAD in Part 2).

Here's a really good review paper on attachment disorders in currently or formerly institutionalized children : Link

Core features of RAD in young children include the absence of focused attachment behaviors directed towards a preferred caregiver, failure to seek and respond to comforting when distressed, reduced social and emotional reciprocity, and disturbances of emotion regulation, including reduced positive affect and unexplained fearfulness or irritability.

Which all sounds a lot like Tom in this scene. The paper also discusses neurological effects, like atypical EEG power distribution (aka brain waves), which can correlate with 'indiscriminate' behavior and poor inhibitory control; which makes sense for a kid who, oh, I don't know, hung another kid's rabbit because they were angry.

Furthermore...

...those children with more prolonged institutional rearing showed reduced amygdala discrimination and more indiscriminate behavior.

This again, makes a ton of sense for Tom's psychological profile, because the amygdala (which is part of the limbic system, which regulates emotions) plays a major role in fear, anger, anxiety, and aggression, especially with respect to learning, motivation and memory.

So, I agree completely that Tom needed a lot of help, especially given the fact that he spent eleven years in an orphanage (longer than the Bucharest study I was referring to), and Dumbledore wasn't exactly understanding of his situation, and probably didn't realise what a dramatic effect the orphanage had on Tom, and given the way he talks to Tom, probably treated him as if he were a kid who grew up in a healthy environment.

In case you are still unconvinced that hugging is that important, there's a famous 1944 study conducted on 40 newborn human infants to see what would happen if their physical needs (fed, bathed, diapers changed) were provided for with no affection. The study had to be stopped because half the babies died after four months. Affection leads to the production of hormones and boosts the immune system, which increases survival, and that is why we hug children and babies should not be in orphanages. They are supposed to be hugged, all the time. I can't find the citation right now, I'll add it later if I find it.

But I think it's vastly unrealistic to say that Dumbledore, who grew up during the Victorian Era, would have any grasp of this and I don't think he was actively malicious towards Tom.

Was Tom Riddle failed by institutional childcare? Absolutely.

Were the adults in his life oblivious to his situation? Probably.

Do the shitty things that happened to Tom excuse the murders he committed, and are they anyone's fault but his own? No. At the end of the day, Tom made all the wrong choices.

And, for what it's worth, I think (film) Dumbledore (although he expresses the same sentiment in more words in the books) wishes he could go back in time and have helped Tom.

"Draco. Years ago, I knew a boy, who made all the wrong choices. Please, let me help you."

[bakugohoex]

bakugou !! with a reader that beats him in the sports festival and takes first place and all his friends laugh at him for losing to a girl and he's all like "i let her win!!>:((" but then she confronts him bc she's annoyed he Still hasn't acknowledged her as a potentially amazing future pro hero and u can make up thereee

“how am i supposed to protect everybody if i can’t even protect you.”

pairing: katsuki bakugo x female reader

cw: fluff, langauge, kissing

word count: 1500+

a/n: hii, sorry this might have taken a while been busy per usual, hope you liked this and per usual i always make them get together in the end because i’m sap with no boyfriend

summary: in which you and bakugo are the ones to go against each other in the final of the sports festival and after you win, he makes it seem like he let you win, after confronting him he finally gives you what you wanted.

↞ back to my hero academia masterlist

The good old UA sports festival, an easy win for the boy who had told the entire arena he would win.

He had such high expectations for himself.

That’s until you came around.

He hated your quirk with a burning passion.

He hated how you could easily get past him and find his faults.

Worst of all he hated the smug look you had every time you won against him.

He was supposed to be the strongest.

Not you.

So when the final fight occurs between you and the spiky blond.

He was pissed.

He saw how you won against Todoroki with ease and the smirk you had then would never amount to the smirk that you would have crushing him.

“You ready to lose, Bakugo.” He hated the way you had such malice in your voice.

He wanted to punch it right from your pretty little mouth.

Maybe he did admire your quirk and the hatred was a mask.

But that smug look you gave him angered him to the boiling point.

With ease you used your quirk to move past him dodging his hits, he knew you weren’t trying, weren’t bothering.

He even swore he saw you checking your nails and then he saw it.

The yellow bright wisps tangling between your fingers, it almost matched his own explosions that you dodged.

And then you hit him, punching him in the gut.

He didn’t even realise how far you’d gotten to him, a close proximity.

And now that you were using your quirk properly, he resented it.

That one punch made him lose the air in his lungs, one touch was all you needed, and you could control his muscular body.

He always tried to not get close to you, tried to keep a distance.

But you’d evaded his attacks by slicking back side to side past his aim.

He was slow, no. He wasn’t you were just too perceptive, having a quirk that made you touch anything and control it had other perks.

Your ability to control your surroundings just with one gaze up and down.

You knew where his explosions would go.

“I think you’ve lost.” You were smirking as you hummed.

He felt disgraced at how easily you controlled his limbs to move out of the area.

He hated how you had won and there was destruction around you, but you weren’t scratched.

Most of all he hated that you were better than him, that you’d protect them all and that was his job.

You defiantly gloated a bit but once you got the medal and an angry Bakugo stood beside you, you felt bad.

Being the sweetie you are you followed him out to tell him he did good.

But that’s when you heard it.

“I can’t believe you lost to a girl again.” Denki laughed out, Kirishima tried to not say anything sympathising with Bakugo.

Hell, he had fought against you and lost himself due to needing contact as well. Denki the only one scared of you had never dared to partner up with you, but it hit a nerve for Bakugo.

He was angry, pissed even, how could he be a hero if he had lost. How could he protect yo...everybody if he lost against your quirk. The acknowledgement that you had a better quirk, were more perceptive, kinder to civilians. How could he ever beat that, and how could he stop thinking about you and that damn quirk.

“I let her win.” Your eyes widened at the comment and anger boiled over you.

“Bako...” Kirishima was about to speak but you stormed out from your hiding spot.

“You let me what?” You shouted it, he noticed the yellow wisps surround your fingers and Denki and Kirishima were scared to say the least.

Kirishima grabbed Denki’s sleeve, “that’s our cue to leave.”

They walked away and with your brows furrowed and a sneer on your lip you were pissed. “Didn’t you hear me?” He mocked. “I. Let. You. Win.”

You were ready to punch him, make his bones break under your command. But you saw after how he looked down not meeting your gaze.

“Bakugo, i came here to say how you did good, just fucking accept i won and stop acting like a dick.” You had started calm, the yellow disappearing but by the end you became pissed once again.

He didn’t meet your gaze, staring at how your fingers looked rough and calloused, he knew you’d go straight into your bag and get the hand cream that smelled of cherries. He always noticed the smell, cherries or mangos, whatever it was it made him shudder.

Looking up at how your UA jacket was unzipped the black tank top encasing your chest, he noticed your heavy breath at hoe your breasts fell up and down with your breathing. Your neck had a scratch across it, maybe one of his hits did get you.

He finally looked up to your face, the scowl on your face waiting for him to speak. He was ready to say something, but he noticed how plump your lips were. How even thought they were dry they looked ever so delectable

“Bakugo.” You repeated his name, but he was in a daze thinking of you.

He often did this around you, just stared and dazed out thinking about each of your features. It wasn’t because he liked you or anything, he just wanted to get a feel for your weaknesses of course. That’s what he would tell himself every night even though it was a blatant lie.

Hell, even the class had caught on. He would sometimes just stop talking when you walked into a room, and when Sero or Kirishima would ask about it. He would say you was scoping out the enemy, it was a lie, and they all knew it.

You were oblivious and whilst tapping your foot you waited crossed arm for an answer. “I...i...” He was stuck taking in a sharp breath he tried to speak.

The only thing that came into your head was to do something that you never wanted to do. You moved your calloused hand to his face; you felt his want cheek cup against your palm, and you activated your quirk.

“Tell me the truth Bakugo, why did you lie?” He hated how you used your quirk on him but even then, it was a relief that whatever he would say would be what he believed to be the truth and that was that it was a blow to his ego.

That’s all he had wanted to say but the real truth had come out, “how am i supposed to protect everybody if i can’t even protect you.”

Your eyes widened at the comment, letting go of his face. His eyes turned wide, and ears reddened, “w...what?”

This time you were breathless, and you waited for an answer, you turned your quirk off scared to hear anymore.

“I didn’t mean that i don’t care about protecting you, you...you mean fucking nothing to me.” It was all a lie, and you knew it was, his scarlet eyes told no truths.

“That’s not what you said before.” You tried to surprise a snicker to not make the situation worse, but his eyes looked full of regret now.

He took another sharp breathe before finally deciding to confess, “i meant what i said, if i can’t protect you and you’re always protecting me how can i save everybody, how can i be the one who will save you?”

“Bakugo, I don’t need saving or protecting, I want us to be equal and protect each other.” He shakes his head folding his arms.

“You don’t understand what I’m trying to say.”

“Then show me what you’re trying to say.” He thought about your words.

You wanted him to show you, so that was what he’d do. “I’ll fucking show you then.” He grabbed your face, his lips on yours, the long-awaited kiss that had been brewing between you two. It felt real, more real than both your dreams of this moment.

You always acknowledged your feelings, you weren’t an ass just to anybody, only him. You gave the same energy back to make him fall for you, but he saw past your comments and saw your kindness to others. A stark contrast, how you adored wanting to be a hero and most of all how you stuck by your aims through to the end.

His hands caressed your cheek, even with the teeth on teeth, lips on lips, it felt softer but in reality, a mess. You both had craved each other too much, all the pent-up anger from losing against you and the comment Bakugo had made, had made the kiss become lustful and full of sin.

He didn’t care who saw, he didn’t care anymore, you would become an amazing hero and he would as well. But you both would stay by each other’s side till the very end. You would protect him, and he would always protect you. 

i’d really appreciate if you guys could leave a like, reblog or comment, thanks x

if you guys want to be a part of a tag list, just reply to any post and i’ll add you xx

@samusimp @alainarose13 @crispychannie @underratedmage @jennammaee @cathy8taffy @sugacious @moonlightaangel @kat-sukis-hoe @effmigentlywithachainsaw @swankiifiied @maat-the-prescriptive @missmultifangirl @tvwhoresblog @kuroos-world @chrrylevi @ukaisgratefulwhore @answer-the-sirens

[mercurysstars]

The Shadow Thief (part 3)

Summary: What happens when Peter has to work with the girl he hates to possibly save the world.

Word Count: 2.8k

Warnings: Swearing, Blood, Violence.

A/n: Sorry it took me so long to post again! I’ve wrote like 3 different versions of this chapter because I didn’t know what direction to go in just yet.

_

"Woah, dude. Did you see this?" Y/n held out Peter's phone shoving it in his face.

Y/n had gone over to Peters house early that morning to get the last finishing touches on their project done. So they both reluctantly decided to walk together to school.

Peter snatched his phone out of Y/n's hands as they crossed the street. "How did you even get my phone? It was in my hands." She shrugged and pointed back at the article.

Peter scrolled down the page. Incoming reports say Avengers went on a mission and since gone MIA. How didn't he know about this? And why didn't the Avengers at least tell him they were going to be gone. Peter was confused, to say the least. Were they in trouble? No, they couldn't be they are the earth's mightiest heroes. Right?

"They probably just had to extend their mission and forgot to report back in." Or at least he hoped. He didn't want to think of the latter. He decided after school he would go to the compound and make sure everything was alright.

"If you say so." They walked up the stairs to the second floor of the school.  Peter opened the door and they both walked into English. Y/n took her seat next to Mj and Peter next to Ned.

The thought of the Avengers missing did worry Y/n a bit. She wasn't a big fan of superheroes but she also was not, not a fan. It was complicated. Sure she liked the security of having someone to save the day. But she hated that they pretended to be better than everyone else. They judge criminals as they themselves have never done anything wrong. They tend to blame everything on everyone else and never take responsibility.

Y/n felt a nudge to her arm. She turned her head to face Mj. "Penny for your thoughts?"

"No, no it's alright I'm just thinking," Y/n said. She pulled out her laptop and opened her and Peter's presentation to have it ready just in case they had to go first.

Their opening slide was a picture of Anne Frank surrounded by a pretty border and Anne Frank’s name in cursive in the middle. Peter insisted their project had to look nice and not like some shitty last-minute one like she had originally done. Y/n had teased Peter relentlessly about it saying maybe he should be a graphic designer instead of Spider-Man. And he of course huffed and pretended to ignore her.

"Well, you just looked worried. Anyways tell me if you need any help." Y/n gave Mj a grateful smile. Y/n knew Mj could have this cold, hard exterior but she knew she secretly cared.

The bell rang signaling the first period started. The teacher stood up from her desk and walked to the front of the room clasping her hands together. "Good morning class. Today is the first official day for our presentations. We'll be picking who goes first by random. Any questions?"

One girl toward the front of the classroom stuck up her hand "Yes, Betty."

"Did you see the news? About the avengers?" The class erupted within hushed conversation everyone stating their theories of what happened and their worries.

"Alright, class settle down. I did see but we will continue like normal." She said. It kind of seemed like to Y/n she didn't care at all but she didn't really think anything of it.

The phone rang and the teacher quickly excused herself. Y/n picked at her fingers mindlessly. The teacher muttered a few words into the phone and hung up "Y/n, Peter." Her eyes snapped up at the sound of her name "They want you down in the office. And bring your things."

Y/n furrowed her brows. Her eyes met Peters "What did you do?" He mouthed just as confused as her.

What did she do? What the hell did he do. She hasn't done anything wrong. Well, at least nothing she gotten caught for.  "Dude if anyone did anything it was you! I've only been here for like 3 weeks." She whispered-yelled back.

He put his hands up defensively. Y/n shoved all of her things in her bag and zipped it up. Mj raised an eyebrow at her and Y/n just shrugged with a clueless look on her face.

Y/n walked over to the door opening it with her free hand while her chrome book was in the other.  Peter followed not too far behind. They step out and began to walk down the hallway shoulder to shoulder not a word muttered between them.

The hall was empty. No teacher, no janitor, no late students, not even the common lost freshman. It was strange to Y/n. She turned to Peter "This is weird. It's almost like it's too."

"Quiet." He finished for her. Peter felt off. His spidey sense wasn't alarming him with anything but it was almost like a gut feeling you'd get when some strange guy came up to you at a party being a little too friendly.

"Yeah." Exactly. They continued down the hall both on high alert. When they passed a window Y/n could see two men dressed in suits around the corner through the reflection.

"I think they're following us." She whispered to Peter. Y/n has picked up a thing or two of trying not to be noticed but the men behind them didn't seem like they cared much for subtlety. They had their eyes set on Y/n and Peter taking wide quick steps.

This time his spidey sense went off. The hairs on the back of his neck stood up. Peter reached for his web-shooters "We need to get out of here."

"You think?" Y/n back said in an aggravated tone. The next time they passed by a window she could see them screw something together slowly by their side.

Y/n glanced down to get a better look, it was a gun. All she could hear was the beating of her heart thumping loudly in her ears. Thinking quickly Y/n shoved Peter into a locker. A bullet whizzed past where his head once was and made a tiny thump when it hit the wall.

His eyes went wide momentarily stunned before he sprung into action. He shot out a web, grabbed the gun out of the man's hand, and flung it across the hall, making sure he couldn't get to it.

The men paused for a minute before muttering something to each other end breaking into a spring toward them. Well mostly at Peter luckily for her but still in her direction. Peter began to fight the one whose gun he had stolen hand to hand. The man got in a punch to Peter's face. Peter tripped him and tied him up with his webs.

The second man was coming toward her. Before she could second guess herself Y/n took her chrome book and slapped the man across the face with it. The man was momentarily shocked and Y/n opened an unlocked locker hitting him in the face. She watched him slide down the lockers unconscious.

More men turned the corner and came down the hallway. Y/n kicked a waist-length garbage can with wheels toward them as a small distraction. Peter grabbed Y/n pulling her into an empty classroom.

Y/n locked the door before she grabbed Peter and dragged him further into the classroom into a supply closet. They both crouched behind a mop bucket leaving the door cracked for a tiny bit of light.

"Would you like to tell me why there's someone outside this classroom trying to blow my brain out!" She huffed.

"Don't ask me. For all, we know they could be after you!" They both flinched as they heard the door handle shake.

"They were attacking you. Shooting at you. And you'd have a bullet in the back of your head if I didn't push you out of the way if I might add." She poked him in the chest.

The men began to start kicking at the door trying to break it down "Maybe if we figure out who they are we can get out of this."

"You know what I have an idea." Y/n reached back and grabbed the gun out of the waistband of her pants. Y/n started not to care much for introductions when they tried to assassinate her. Her motto was to shoot first ask questions later because she was not going down without a fight.

"What the hell Y/n! Where did you even get a gun?" Peter tried to put some distance between them but failed and ended up bumping into a shelf.

"Calm down bug boy I'm not going to shoot you." She rolled her eyes "I grabbed it off the guy while I smashed my laptop over his head."

"You are not shooting anyone!" He exclaimed. He was going to die with a psychopath. A literal psychopath. What would his uncle Ben say if he could see him right now?

"Fine whatever. How many webs do you have left?"

"Only one." He muttered.

"Only one! How the hell do you only have only one web left?" Oh lord. She was going to die in a janitor's closet with an idiot.

"Oh well, I'm sorry I didn't know I would have someone trying to paint the walls with my organs. I must have forgotten to mark it on my calendar!"

"Oh god, Okay." Y/n rubbed her forehead with her free hand.

She took the clip out of her gun and counted the bullets she had. Two. Okay, she could work with that, Somehow. She just had to live long enough to beat Peter up for almost getting them killed.

She turned back to Peter "Alright here's the plan so we are going to jump out of the window and see just how far that web can exactly get us." She could hear the pounds on the door getting more frequent and if she was being honest she was surprised it held this long.

"Are you crazy! You going to get us both killed." He didn't need the answer because he already knew she was. He swore he could see the shadows swirl around her for a moment but as quickly as it was there it was gone.

"Do you have any better ideas because I'm all ears, Parker?" He didn't say anything and just ran a hand through his hair letting out a frustrated sigh.

"That's what I thought." Y/n knew there was a good chance that they get hit by incoming traffic like a bug on a windshield but it was either that or the SWAT team outside.

"Let's get this over with." Said Y/n. They both stepped outside of the closet. The men outside the room gave the door one last kick and it broke off of the hinges. "Go." That was all Peter said.

Y/n shot the window with the two bullets she had. Peter ran over to Y/n and grabbed onto her tightly. They jumped through the window shattering it. Peter shoots out his last web hooking onto a nearby tree. At the peak of the swing, Peter let go of the web. They flew over the traffic narrowly avoiding the cars.

When they finally reached the ground they hit it hard. Peter took most of the impact but Y/n still hit her head. They continued to hold tightly onto each other as they rolled through the grass from the momentum of the swing.

They came to a slow stop and Y/n landed on top of Peter. She slumped off to the side of him and sat up. Peter did the same but with a groan feeling all of the bones in his body.

He noticed blood began to trickle out of Y/n's nose. "You got something." He pointed to her nose.

She wiped under her nostrils with her fingers and then again with the bottom of her shirt without a second thought "Oh, Thanks."

Peter rested his head on his knees. What was he going to do? As much as he didn't like Y/n he felt bad for dragging her into this. "We need to get going they are going to come looking for us soon."

"Where are we going to go?" The light was starting to become too much so Y/n put her hand over her eyes to shield her from the sun. She was starting to get a headache and just wanted to lay down. Peter stood up and dusted off his shirt and pants.

"Avengers compound." He held out a hand to her. She took it and he pulls her up onto her feet. They began to walk toward the street.

"I just don't know how we are going to get there." He added. They made it onto the sidewalk. Y/n was stumbling around so Peter kept his pace slow so she could keep up with him.

Y/n stopped walking "What do you think of this car?" She nodded to a 1997 Honda Accord.

"It's cool I guess." He said confused the car was a little old but he didn't say anything.

"Alright good. Now hand me your web-shooters." She held out her hand toward him.

"Okay?" He didn't really know what she was trying to get at. Peter just assumed she hit her head too hard but he complied anyway.

Y/n crouched down facing the car. She broke his web-shooters over her knee taking out two long curved metal pieces. She handed him back the rest of his broken web-shooters. Peter stared at her wide-eyed as she stuck the two metal pieces into the lock of the car.

"What are you doing." He hissed. Peter walked closer to Y/n trying to cover her as she picked the lock to the car.

"I just gave our problem a solution." She said without looking. She continued to twist the pieces around until she heard a little click. She gave a little cheer and opened the door.

"Yeah by stealing someone's car. Need I remind you is illegal."

" I like to think of it as borrowing. Besides I will happily leave you if you wish." She rolled her eyes. God, her head was throbbing.

Y/n took the plastic cover off of the steering column. There were three sets of wires and she grabbed the middle one. Y/n cut the red and blue wire. She touched the wires together until she heard the car start. She smiled to herself and lastly twisted the wires together.

She turned to Peter "Are you getting in or what?"

Peter looked around and then sighed "Fine, but I'm driving."

"What? No way, you don't even look old enough to drive." She crossed her arms.

"You have a concussion so I'm our best bet at not dying." He gave Y/n a sarcastic smile.

"Whatever." She rolled her eyes but got out of the driver's seat.

"You know if you keep rolling your eyes they are going to get stuck like that." She flicked him off and he laughed.

Y/n basically collapsed into the passengers seat. Peter closed his door and started the car. He pulled into the street and Y/n rested her head against the window. The cool glass felt nice against her forehead. She notice a bruise on Peter's pale cheek from when he got hit earlier.

Every now and again he would glance at Y/n to see how she was doing. He figured she must not feel the best because she hasn't said one witty remark since they got into the car.

He hoped by now the Avengers were back at the compound and could Tell them what's going on and who was following them.

He looked over to her again and she had her eyes close. He jabbed her with his elbow "Hey, don't fall sleep. You might not wake back up."

"Hmm Okay." She said but didn't budge.

"I'm serious Y/n, open your eyes." Peter was starting to get worried. It wasn't that he cared about her. But he didn't know what to do with a dead body. Or at least that's what he told himself.

"Don't get your panties into a bunch, my eyes are open."

They pulled into the road of the compound. When it came into view Y/n suddenly sat up wide eyed "Holy shit."

"What?" Peter took his eyes off of Y/n and followed her line of sight.

"What the fu-"

Part 4

Taglist

@fandom-strumpet • @ginger-swag-rapunzel • @libraries-and-coffee

[japes-the-clown]

THE SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS MOVIE: AN INVERSION ON “COMING OF AGE” FILMS AND A CRITICISM OF ADULTHOOD

Hi hello hey it’s me Jericho Jay “Japes” Marshall out here with a pretentious love letter to the filmmaking on display in nickelodeons The Spongebob Movie. Yes, I know it’s a kids movie. Yes, I know it’s not that deep. But I’m majoring in english, and deeply depressed, so I need to get this OUT and onto a PAGE.

I have watched this film many times over my lifetime, a few when i was just a kid, then in my early teens, even when i turned eighteen, and now, a month before i turn 20. Every time, I grow a new appreciation for the nuances that this movie brings to the table, and on my most recent watch my own deliverance from childhood makes me relate to the core themes the hardest I ever have. The Spongebob Movie isn’t just a movie about childhood, but a movie about adulthood.

Today, I’m going to make clear exactly how The Spongebob Squarepants Movie criticizes our understanding of adulthood and how society treats the neurodivergent, while effectively turning the “Coming of Age” genre on its head, within its 87 minute runtime.

START: CONSISTENT CHARACTERIZATION

One thing a lot of films (ESPECIALLY kids films) fail to nail is consistently showing aspects of a character throughout the runtime, enough that changes to a character feel impactful and justified instead of rushed and stifled. The best examples of movies that fail to do this are often the marvel movies that people tend to not remember- the first two thor movies, the avengers age of ultron, etc. In these movies, characters certainly have traits, but their personalities and motives can be very weak and make dramatic changes feel A LOT less dramatic. This can be seen in age of ultron, when quicksilver gave his own life to save someone else, which felt like nothing because he wasn't well developed. He wasn't particularly endearing, nor did him sacrificing his life contradict a part of his character. It felt very much like the writers trying to say "Look, this character which was once opposing the avengers, is now dying for one. Please cry." No hate to the writers of Age of Ultron, but it proves itself often to be an unmemorable part of the catalogue.

In the Spongebob Movie, the characterization is ON. POINT. After the introduction, with the pirates rushing in to watch spongebob, we get so much information regarding spongebob as a character.

Pictured: Spongebob holding a piece of cheese like an operator

The first scene of the plot is a dream sequence a large crowded scene at the Krusty Krab, with a customer not receiving cheese on his patty, and it being positioned in the same way as a bomb being located. In the dream, everyone is panicked, and Mr. Krabs is visibly distressed, almost like a damsel. Spongebob comes in, announcing his position as manager, much to the relief of Krabs. He goes in, and puts cheese on the burger (again, very akin to a bomb defusal scene), bringing the perturbed customer out safe and sound. Everyone lifts spongebob up as a hero, which is interrupted by his boat alarm.

This scene is JAM PACKED with stuff that both introduces the character to new watchers and introduces the crux of his arc to everyone else. Spongebob of course is very fond of the Krusty Krab, and wants to be the manager- he wants people to see him as cool, and as a responsible adult. He wants to be the sort of person that can be trusted with big responsibilities. And we also see, most importantly, that he is extremely childish through his faximile of what it meant to be adult. Everything is scaled up; it's a very silly situation, which well suits both the joke and his character as an inexperienced kid. This is one of the most direct ways to convey someone's character, because a dream can be interpreted as a direct port into a character's desires. This being the first introduction to the character in the movie sets the tone for EVERY following situation.

In the next few scenes you see Spongebob's real life, which involves his lengthy morning routine; his life is sort of whimsical, and so too is his routine. He showers by shoving a hose into himself till he bursts with water, he uses toothpaste to clean his eyes but not his teeth, and he puts on pants which he must fold to make. Again, all pretty solid jokes, but also very telling about his outlook. He is funny, weird, and childish, which is juxtaposed by the scene where he's- he's uh- showering with squidward. Squidward is an example of the "adult" that spongebob isn't. This has always been the case, but here his normal routine makes it very clear that other people in this world aren't like spongebob. They shower normally, they brush their teeth, they put their clothes on like normal. Spongebob's world is one of wonder and without responsibility, which makes it questionable as to whether he could handle one.

Pictured: Spongebob's room, adorned with childhood imagery

Pictured: Spongebob celebrating his position as a manager, despite Krabs saying that it was squidward who got it

Even his room in this scene screams "kid". He has toys strewn about, glow in the dark stars, and pictures of superheroes on the wall. He even says "Sorry about this calendar" as he rips a page, personifying inanimate objects as a kid would. The movie is telling you, "THIS CHARACTER IS A KID", but in a way that's masked because it's also just a set up for jokes. It's done so well, in my opinion, that it would go over your head because from your perspective you would be laughing along as spongebob did his wacky antics.

On top of that, his excitement for his assured managerial position at the Krusty Krab 2 continues to be bolstered. He marked it off with a cute drawing on his calendar, for those familiar he changes his normal "I'm ready" chant to "I'm ready- promotion-", and he's even already set up a party to celebrate at his favorite chain, Goofy Goobers, a child's entertainment restaurant similar to chucky cheese, albeit replacing pizza for ice cream. He hasn't just gotten excited, but has this childish anticipation for something which isn't even assured.

Spongebob arrives at the opening of the Krusty Krab 2, where he is so excited he can't contain his glee. He breaks the silence and makes members of the crowd uncomfortable, reinforcing again that spongebob is a standout in a world of adults, and a kid who doesn't understand certain social norms, which society looks down upon. When Krabs reveals that Squidward got the managerial position, Spongebob hyped himself so much that he starts celebrating, not even noticing that he wasn't picked. He gets on stage, and begins to give a speech, to which Krabs interrupts.

The next part I think best illustrates Spongebob's clear ignorance to society: Krabs attempts to subtly tell spongebob that he isn't getting the job, but spongebob repeats everything he says into the microphone. Again, fantastic joke, grade A, but the amount this shows how invested spongebob was. He already saw himself as an adult, someone who everyone would look up to as a manager- he could take the responsibility, and isn't aware of everyone likely cringing in the audience. This is the natural step for him in his mind, especially because of his exemplary work which had been previously celebrated through employee of the month awards. This was not an option for him. There wasn't a world in his mind where he would be outclassed by squidward.

Krabs has to break to him that he lacks responsibility, and that his childishness makes it difficult for Krabs to give him such a job. This might seem harsh, but I think the intro again shows how Spongebob saw the job; he didn't understand what it would be like, fantasizing another level in the menial work structure to be an amazing adventure of a job. People in the crowd reaffirm that in the eyes of society, spongebob is just a kid, a goofball. In my eyes, this is a story not just of childhood, but of neurodivergence. Spongebob isn't normal, and is blocked by society for his ignorance of social norms and sunny disposition. He finds things fun that other people can not, and he places values in completely different things. So he is blocked from the meaningful recognition he desired, despite the obvious evidence of his commitment.

I think this is a mighty interesting dichotomy!!! Simultaneously, spongebob's understanding of the world truly is warped, often resulting in a lack of consideration for others as well as harm for himself when things don't go his way, AND he is a good worker which puts in MANY hours of work without so much of a complaint. This is COMPLEX. You have to ask yourself, as a viewer, "would I give spongebob the job?" The answer can be different and can be REASONED.

And that's JUST spongebob! There are other characters with characterization that mixes into the themes of the movie very well, but I'm going to bring up any related points in future sections.

Okay, Okay. So now you're saying "WOW OKAY GREAT so why does any of this matter?" I'm so glad you asked. VERY glad.

2: THE BREAKING OF A YOUNG MAN'S SPIRIT

THIS is the point of the movie. The obstacle in this movie truly isn't adulthood, but instead self doubt. Spongebob's whole world is turned upside down by Krab's rejection of his basic personality. Spongebob asks himself: is it REALLY okay to be who I am? Am I an adult? Is the world fair? One of the most shocking scenes in the movie is blended so well in tone with the rest that you don't really notice; spongebob eating ice cream to cope with his disappointment, akin to that of adults drinking alcohol, and appearing to be visually "drunk" and washed up. This is BRILLIANT, and a recurring theme, where the true line between adult and childhood becomes blurry and impossible to see. Spongebob, the representation of a kid, gets hungover, spiteful, and angry about the injustice of his situation. This is often how adults act in the fact of adversity, but what's funny is that this too is how a kid would act; getting angry and overindulging, feeling entitled and acting socially immature when he didn't get what he wanted. He walks in to the Krusty Krab literally just to shit talk Krabs. And it doesn't stop there.

Pictured: Plankton finding "Plan Z" and looking at it like a centerfold in a playboy magazine

Almost every character in this movie juxtaposes another, again smearing the line of what it means to be an adult. For example, Spongebob and Plankton are polar opposites; plankton is cold and vengeful, angry at the world around him, and spongebob is a happy person who tends not to take things personally, a friend to all. In planktons first appearances in the movie, he is portrayed with clear adult themes, mocking spongebob, making pinup jokes about plan z, and living in a fairly dark and grey space. But, as the story moves along, we see many similarities; both spongebob and plankton are fairly one track minded, and when spongebob's perception is broken he himself gets a little vengeful. When eugene is put in danger over this, though, we do see that he places the lives of others over his own wants. And, even at the end of the movie, we see their similarities. Plankton reuses the "Sorry Calendar" joke that spongebob used at the start of the movie, drawing another line of what it means to be an adult. Is it childish of plankton to say that? Is the inherent irony he has impactful here? His want for something that isn't his, and his disregard for others in pursuing it feels just like how a younger child may steal the toy of another, without understanding what it means to share.

Pictured: Neptune flipping his shit at his lost crown

Then, there's the character of Neptune. Neptune is a big man baby. He rules the entire land, commands the most respect, and is considered the most powerful person under the sea, and yet, we see that he gets overprotective of his property, prepared to execute anyone who even annoys him. Throughout the film, he's obsessed with chasing an image of youth, as he is bald, and ignores the suffering of the people on bikini bottom to make sure no one sees his bald head. He throws what's equivalent to a tantrum when he finds his crown is missing, and believes a very crude note written by plankton saying that it was eugene who stole it. His character is an "acceptable" child because he's in a position of power, where spongebob is an "unacceptable" child as he is just a working class member of society. And the funniest part is, that he mocks spongebob for wanting to go for the crown, when even he, the strongest person in bikini bottom, refuses to go out of fear.

We see that these "bastions" of adulthood, plankton and neptune, are the ones who are responsible for missteps of society; we're ALL children in the long run, but the strict enforcement of a perceived true adulthood creates a space where they can act immaturely yet those under them/around them cannot. Dennis makes this case even more, as the only thing he does in this movie is hurt others. There's only one thing that seems to truly denote adulthood, and it's cruelty.

Even squidward, the adult that is supposed to be more responsible that spongebob, refuses to go on the quest to retrieve the crown, as he acts mostly in self interest, even later claiming to only care that plankton was stealing the secret formula as it was hurting his own paycheck.

Spongebob is the only one willing to go, willing to defend the man who wronged him, willing to value life over his own interests. He is both child and adult, just as the adults are too children.

As he moves through the plot of this film, he becomes less confident in his disposition, with his naivete causing moments like him and patrick crossing the state line and immediately getting carjacked, or them being put into an uncomfortable situation by all the bubbles they blew when they tried to get their car back. His bright personality is questioned constantly: Only five days to shell city? BY CAR. This is man's country. But weren't we the double bubble blowing babies?

Pictured: Spongebob caught trying to take back the key to the patty wagon when patrick fails to distract everyone

This is made more obvious to him as patrick remains oblivious throughout; patrick is a mirror for him, that acts as a childhood constant, that makes it clearer for him every day the draws of his childishness. There's the moment in the club where patrick's distraction was poorly thought out, and only because he said he wanted to do it adamantly, there's the moment where patrick challenged neptune on how many days they would have to do it, which served no purpose but for his own fun, there's the moment patrick points out the free ice cream trap- he is the unemployed uncritical lens that spongebob is afraid he is.

So everything's fucked, and anyone who is childish is bad i guess!!!

But that isn't so,

3: The illusion of manhood

So we've talked about spongebob's characterization as a naive child, how this is impactful in his transformation into someone who is anxious about that aspect of his personality, and how the society around him is hypocritical in it's own immaturity. But where does this all come together?

Pictured: Planktons dystopian world, which Mindy shows Spongebob and Patrick

It's at spongebob and patricks "conversion to manhood". At his lowest point, spongebob becomes a squidward- he becomes critical of his AND patricks interests, and regards them as childish, deciding that this means that they can't make it to shell city, as it requires them to be adults. When mindy shows them the dire situation back home, she hopes that spongebob's sunny personality and care for others would shine through, but instead he turns to what society has been telling him; it's impossible. He can't do it, he's just a little kid, and there is no point to any of this as he'll fail regardless.

Thinking about it like this, it truly is one of the darkest points in the entire series; spongebob just openly admitted that there was nothing he could do, that all of his friends were goners because he was effectively useless.

Mindy comes up with an idea; she'll trick spongebob and patrick into believing they're men; she convinces them of mermaid magic (their innocence allowing them to believe) and uses kelp to make them think they've matured into adults. Notice that physical modifiers being the only key to this "fake adulthood". With this, they jump off a cliff because they believe that with adulthood, they are invincible.

This is really telling about how the society they're in thinks of being an adult, and relays that to children. There's another level, a distinct separation between spongebob and adulthood, which seemed like the difference between a squire and a knight- being an adult means that you aren't weak anymore (as though he was weak in the first place), and thus you can do things you never thought before. Is it truly healthy that this is how a society tells kids that adulthood is like, for them to enter the world and feel a truly awful financial and literal hellscape waiting for them? uh, you can, you can decide that for yourself i think.

Nonetheless, they survive the fall, and conclude that they really are invincible, able to power through a ravine with their happy go lucky attitude, eventually befriending the monsters which were once trying to kill them. They weren't acting like adults, but the labels themselves made it possible for them to soldier on with the childlike disposition they had. I find that to be powerful. If we were able to be more hopeful as adults, and power through the worst things brightly, could we do great things? Idk but these depression meds sure do taste good nom nom

After crossing the ravine, spongebob and patrick meet dennis, and have their worldview crushed as it's revealed that they are actually still kids. Dennis being the "alpha male" that he is, is characterized by violence and a lack of morality. The pair are saved by a giant boot, which is the first of two humans in this movie. Spongebob and patrick are both taken by the man in the diver suit, as we fade to black, marking the end of their illusion of adulthood.

4: Back from the Edge (of death)

Spongebob and Patrick awaken in an antique shop, realizing that they were surrounded by fish that had been killed specifically for sale as tacky antiques. They are lifted out of their fishbowl, and put under a heatlamp, as their fate is sealed to become a member among those dead fish. In spongebob's final moments, he mourns his inability to be an adult, as well as to reach shell city; but before they both die, patrick points out that they truly did reach shell city, as the crown was within their reach.

This. This is a phenomenal scene. Why? Because of what it means for spongebob's arc.

Pictured: Spongebob and Patrick on their deathbeds, finding happiness

He sees the crown, and realizes that, unequivocally, that even if he didn't bring the crown back, he made it to shell city. Every person he met told him that he couldn't even do that. and he did it. He is a kid, yes, but he's a kid who went where not even NEPTUNE dared go. Everything people said about him, about how him being a kid stopped him from success, was suddenly shattered. He has been asking himself if it's okay that he is a kid, and he saw, unambiguously, that it is. He is allowed to be happy. He can enjoy things that other people don't. He can be naive. He can be himself, no matter what anyone says. And so can you. Great things can be done by people who are "childish", who are "naive", who are kind without expecting a return, all of it. YOU are okay. Your stims are okay, your comfort series are okay, your interest in tropes are okay, YOU'RE OKAY!!!!

with that, spongebob and patrick are dehydrated on the table, and ostensibly die, the kids that they are, shedding one final tear each, forming a heart beneath them.

...

Miraculously, the tear electrocutes that lamp at it's socket, causing smoke to rise and set off the sprinklers, rehydrating the pair, and bringing them back to life. The "Man in the Suit" attempts to capture them, seeing them about to lift Neptune's crown, but the rest of the dehydrated fish come back to life- squirting him with his own glue and beating him to the ground, as spongebob and patrick run out with the crown. David Hasselhoff offers them a ride back to Bikini Bottom, and the pair begin their ride back.

5: The confrontation of Adulthood and Childhood

Pictured: Dennis looking all lame and shit

As spongebob and patrick are being swam back to bikini bottom, the boot under which dennis was crushed rockets to Hasselhoff, spitting him back out to finish the job. The appearance of Dennis, IN MY OPINION, makes him look rather goofy, with his broken glasses making him look more like a office worker than a badass assassin as he attempts to kill spongebob and patrick. Spongebob, in trying to reason with him, is able to ruin his eyes with bubbles, and then survives as dennis gets hit by a raised platform which spongebob and patrick are too low to be hit by.

Having defeated one representation of adulthood, spongebob and patrick are shot down by HasselHoffs MASSIVE MAN TITS with the crown in order to prevent Krab's fate, blocking Neptune's lazer just in time as they crash in.

All seems to be well, but plankton uses one of his mind control helmets (which we'll be getting into later) to enslave even Neptune, putting mindy, spongebob, patrick, and Krabs against the wall.

In another stark moment of characterization, Spongebob tells patrick that "Plankton Cheated", which prompts plankton to tell spongebob that the situation wasn't a kiddy game, and that it was the real world. This sort of distinctions in their ethos tell you how spongebob interacts with justice; he believes in "playing fair", while plankton is bitter and believes in getting what he wants.

Finally, the apex to our plot, is a musical number. Spongebob begins to make a long-winded speech, where he takes ownership of every label he was called as he stood on the stage at the beginning, the similarity between the two events being clear (holding a microphone at an inappropriate time, making a speech as he blocks out input from an adult trying to talk him down). Spongebob then busts out into the film's rendition of Twisted Sister's "I Wanna Rock", "I'm a Goofy Goober". This results in spongebob reversing plankton's whole plot with "the power of rock and roll". Plankton is made powerless, and thrown into a little padded cell.

The final scene in the movie has Mr. Krabs freed from his imprisonment in ice, and spongebob is offered squidwards position as manager of the second Krusty Krab. He seems hesitant, and squidward offers an insightful analysis of what spongebob might be feeling (the typical analysis of a coming of age movie, where the protagonist finds out that what they wanted all along is not what they wanted, but it was what was inside all along). Spongebob refutes that squidwards fly was just down, and GLADLY accepts the job.

AND THAT'S THE MOVIE

6: AN INVERSION ON THE COMING OF AGE GENRE

A coming of age story tends to be one which is focus on the growth of a character from childhood to adulthood, asking questions about what it means to be an adult. A character reaches for their perceived adulthood, and realizes what it means to ACTUALLY be an adult, typically juxtaposing what people think (drugs, parties, sex) versus what the movie postures as the correct adulthood (responsibility). In this, I think that the spongebob movie directly criticizes the position of what "an adult" is, in the sense of how someone acts.

Like we discussed in part 2, every adult character in this movie tends to be very childish in themselves, unable to see through simple ruses, and often very possessive of personal property. I don't think we actually see a child in this movie as a speaker at any point, only really as background characters (in goofy goobers to solidify spongebob as childish, and I believe in the chum bucket as they're lead to an unsafe place by their parents, who are supposed to be responsible). Thus, what is mostly examined is how adulthood and childhood is a very thin line. Squidward, for example, going directly to plankton to accuse him of stealing the formula, instead of taking it to the top immediately, which would have ended this whole thing fairly quickly; that was rather silly, and was the fruit of his need to assert himself as an adult.

Spongebob goes through this movie FIRST not caring much about whether or not he was an adult, and it is only after the social pressure from adults does he start to chase it. He then chases his perceived image of an adult, going on an adventure, and is crushed by the fact that he isn't an adult. Instead of finding what an adult is, he instead becomes comfortable with his existence as a child, finding himself at the end of the movie able to comfortably chase after an ideal again, where in a normal movie he would humbly reject the job he was offered.

This is, truly, what we should all take from this film. Spongebob realizes that people who aren't necessarily socially adjusted or acceptable can do great things, regardless of what the people around them say, especially because the people around them are liable to throw tantrums and be actively harmful to society. He is allowed to find comfort in childish things, and to be naive, because the world needs more people willing to help others. It's a scathing criticism on the imposed adulthood that exists in a lot of coming of age films, which begs us to drop fun in the interest of doing the right thing, as though those two ideas are contradictory.

BONUS: EXTRA STUFF THAT I LIKED

The goofy goober song became really good storytelling, at first marking childishness, then marking a level of discomfort and judgement in the club, then marking spongebob recognizing that his happiness came from what he liked and not some vague idea of adulthood, and finally marking his full acceptance of his childishness, taking the form of rock, the music of rebellion. It's not as subtle as leitmotifs, but it works really well in how the same song can give very different feelings throughout, and inform how we interact with a story.

There are a lot more examples of adults being pressured into childishness, with the connected twins who liked goofy goober at the club, who were beaten senseless for absolutely no reason, which highlights the way that the society hurts people that, by all means, are just as much adults as anyone else. There's of course Plankton's helmets which created a society of people who simply slaved away with nothing to say, taking life as it came and listening to authority.

On top of that, this movie is PRETTY ANTICAPITALIST AND ANTIMONARCHY, despite those things being allowed to continue to exist at the end- monarchy is seen misusing power constantly and often for unfounded reasons, and Spongebob's diligence at work is rejected by a penny pinching Krabs, who cares only about money. Like, THE KRUSTY KRABS ARE RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER? THAT IS SOME MONTY PYTHON ASS SHIT. This year is the first year i laughed at that joke, because it's really some "capitalists are fucking dumb as shit" humor that slipped over my head when i was a kid. The villain literally being defeated by Rock and Roll, which was sung with a message against the oppression of differences in people? Yeah, I think the spongebob movie hated rich mother fuckers.

END: UH YEAH THAT'S WHAT IT IS

So yeah. The movie is good I think. There's a lot more i could go into, but I've been writing this post for hours and at this point i haven't even read it so...

I recommend going back and giving this film a rewatch!!! Pay attention to all the moments where adults act like children/kids act like adults, because it'll make ur brain pop like a zit. Anyways that's me, I'm Jericho Jay "Japes" Marshall, and I HATE facism.

[jonnyparable]

Cottage Hills : The Red Chamber Part V

The Manuscript of Nehemiah

With all his magical ingredients and apparatus back in his possession, and the manuscript in his hands, Won can finally accomplish the work that he came here to do, since he arrived last year. But what is this manuscript? What's written in it and why did Won come all this way to get it ?

Won:

"At long last! The manuscript of Nehemiah, grand patriarch of the Moshus! I've come all this way, and now, thanks to you, Moguai, I finally have it! Now we can make these thieves pay for what they've done to my family!"

Moguai:

"Now that the manuscript of your great ancestor, Nehemiah is back where it belongs, in the hands of a Moshu, you can finally right the wrong that was done to your ancestors all those centuries ago. The manuscript was written by Nehemiah himself. And contains his very own recipe for making the most lethal potion in the world, the Black Cup. Better known as Death in a Bottle..."

Won:

"These fools may have the Golden Cup, which will protect them from lesser poisons, but even the Golden Flower's powers are useless against the finality of cold, brutal, instant death! "

The Next Day...

Old Acquaintances

As mid autumn rolls around, the town is busy preparing for the annual Mid Autumn Hotpot at the square, when who should come by the Cooper Farm but old friends, Eva and Oak, the scientists who saved Rod's life in the Simalayas last winter. He introduces them to his family, and catches them up on the miraculous happenings after his return to town.

Rod:

"Eva! Oak! You've come! Meet my wife and son. This is Lillia, and Rick."

Eva:

"Hello Tiger Spirit! It is wonderful to see you again. Your hometown is beautiful, like you said. Nice to finally meet you Lillia. We have heard much about you from Rod. We've come bearing gifts today. As promised, we come with medicine, made from the Golden Flower, which your husband found, but in an act of true nobility, gave to us. We are here to repay that debt"

Rod:

"Thank you, friends, but there is no need. As you can see, Lillia is well now. By some miracle, I believe the Goddess came to me in a dream, and planted the flower in my garden! Our local healer was able to use it to make a cure after all!"

Oak:

"My! That is tremendous news indeed! You are indeed very blessed! We must meet this healer!"

Rod:

"Of course! I shall bring you to see her later. For now, let me show you around the town! The Mayor would probably like to meet you too."

The Return of You-Know-Who

At Rose Square the mayor is currently overseeing preparations for the annual Mid Autumn Hotpot tomorrow as villagers help to set up the large iron pot and put up the lights and decorations. Every year, the townsfolk gather in the square and everyone brings an ingredient to add to the hot pot, followed by a hike up the mountain to see the full moon. The preparations are interrupted by Harris, who's come to tell everyone to stop.

Harris:

"Alright, listen up everyone. After the strange fire last night at the constabulary, Ellen was found unconscious in the church, and is currently recovering in the clinic. We have reason to believe that these are not isolated incidents and that You-know-who has returned. It is therefore unwise to go ahead with such gatherings. As such, everyone is advised to return to your homes for your safety immediately. Thank you everyone."

Mayor Thomas :

"Now, hold on a minute, son. I understand you're just being cautious but there's no need to make everyone panic. After all, there's no proof that any of this has to do with you-know-who, and-"

Harris :

"Father, with all due respect, the villager's safety is of the utmost importance. Until You-know-who is found, he will pose a constant threat to the town and I- We, must always be vigilant."

Just then, in the midst of their heated discussion, Rod arrives and introduces Eva and Oak. The Mayor, glad for the interruption, asks them to stay for tomorrow night's festivities, as the rest of the villagers continue with their preparations.

Mayor Thomas:

"Ah! So you are Rod's friends from the mountain! Rod has told us so much about you! Well, you two are heroes! And dear friends of the town! If you have no pressing matters to attend to, you simply must stay as our honoured guests and attend the festival tomorrow! The moon this autumn is particularly round, a very good omen!"

Harris:

"Father, please, I must insist that -"

Mayor Thomas:

"Alright, that's quite enough son. Your pursuit of Won has become a bit of an obsession of late, I must say. I think the villagers have had enough of all this you-know-who business and fear-mongering, when its clear that he's gone, and he's not coming back. The Goddess clearly watches over us! We must believe and never give in to fear! After all, He hasn't been seen for a year now, and the Goddess has blessed us with the Golden Cup, what's the worse you-know-who can do now even if he does return? "

Harris:

"Father! This isn't about fear! Have you forgotten what he did to us, and how much suffering he caused last year? Yes we are lucky to have the Golden Cup, but I'm duty bound to protect our town. Just because we've been unable to find him, doesn't mean he's gone. What if he's the one who hurt Ellen? "

Rod:

"Hurt her? What happened to Ellen?"

Harris:

"Last night she was found unconscious in the church. We don't know the exact reason why, but she's being examined by Dr. Tim as we speak...poor Ellen...how could all this happen in one night? "

Mayor Thomas:

"... Nobody blames you for what happened , you know... I know you mean well but.. "

Harris:

"At any rate, this festival cannot go on, its too risky, and..."

Mayor Thomas and Harris continue to disagree, and as Eva and Oak look into the serene face of the Goddess Statue behind them, they exchange concerned expressions. They have no idea who Harris and Mayor Thomas are talking about, but whoever he is, he seems to have the townspeople all worked up. They've come just in the nick of time it seems...

That Night...

The Autumn Moon

Back in You-Know-Who's hideout, Won is putting together the deadly ingredients for the Black Cup, and as he waits for the most important ingredient, he and Moguai discuss their diabolical plans.

Moguai:

"In the hot pot? Surely you jest."

Won:

"Not at all! It's perfect! Every autumn, these fools gather at the square and they all share from a pot of broth, laughing and cajoling and merry-making. It's the most vile thing I've ever seen, honestly. Pass me that bottle of newt's eyes, will you? They're probably making preparations for it as we speak. Now that we've gotten rid of that meddling Elmsley hag, this will be a breeze! I'll just freeze time long enough to add just a few drops of the Black Cup into their pot and...well, dinner is served!"

Moguai:

"Yes that's all well and good, but are you sure you have everything you need to make the Black Cup? The festival is tomorrow is it not?"

Won:

"Oh, yes, Moguai, yes we do. Not to worry. We have just enough to make one, which is all we need for now. As we speak, the last ingredient is on its way. Look up there, we have by act of providence, the biggest full moon we've seen in years this autumn equinox! When it reaches its highest point in the sky, I will call on its power to complete the potion! Sweet revenge is mine at long last!"

A Lamb to Slaughter

Meanwhile, Zack begins to worry about Olkan again. With a moon this big out, it seems Olkan's transformations are becoming longer and more violent. Zack goes out looking for him, just to make sure he's alright and not causing trouble. This time, however, he seems to have strayed a little far from their home in the wrong direction, and has stumbled into a strange part of the woods that he does not recognise. He sees some strange totems hanging in between two rocks. Unfamiliar with their significance, and drawn by curiosity, he walks through them...

As a Servo, Won's wards of concealment have no effect on him and he's able to just slip through, and Won's hideout is laid bare before him. Poor Zack soon stumbles upon Won and Moguai, and can't believe what he's hearing. He overhears Won talking about what they did to Ellen, and about his plans to somehow kill everyone in town by putting a lethal poison in the town's hot pot tomorrow! As Zack tries to override his panic function and execute his focusing program, so he can think about what to do next, he realises that they've stopped talking, and an eerie, suffocating silence hangs in the air...

Moguai:

"Hush! Someone has slipped through your wards. I smell a rat.... There! Below! He's heard us! Seize him!"

Zack turns to run, back to town to try and warn someone, anyone, and to tell them what Won is up to. But he doesn't get very far...

Moguai:

"And just where do you think you're going?"

[bookwyrminspiration]

(pyro here! i feel like this is...very ramble-y and i apologize if this doesn't make sense, and no obligation to post if it all feels like i'm just going in circles or for any other reason)

this could just be me, but i find keeper to be so interesting in so many ways but mostly because of how little actual good guys and bad guys there are, if that makes sense? it doesn't seem like it on the surface, and the story seems rather clear-cut if you don't think about it too hard, but there's no character or group in the series that's completely perfect and hasn't done anything wrong ever, iirc? like, the council is very obviously not too pressed over whether their actions are morally right and they're the government of a species that's supposedly all about being righteous, and neither are the black swan nor neverseen, which i find really interesting to look at, especially when the protagonists start to realize these things and question them, outwardly or inwardly.

and even any developed individual characters aren't clear-cut. yes, sophie is our protagonist, but she's also an arsonist that frequently breaks the laws of her world and has nearly started a war by breaking a treated because she was curios as to what was in an ogre king's mind. linh is- well, she's the token nice asian girl, but she also flooded an entire city, twice, and has most definitely killed people. dex may not have done anything really wrong, but he still created the ability restrictor, a device that put his best friend through days/weeks of torment, all because he was happy to recieve attention from the council. and that's just three of the main characters.

and i'm under the impression you really don't care about the council (which is fine and totally valid!) but it's still so interesting how the three important characters from there follow this as well. oralie was revealed to be sophie's mother meaning she committed treason and should probably be in exile, kenric was actively hiding important information from oralie (and knew about her being sophie's mother and therefor was a willing accomplice to treason and should also be in exile), and bronte has gotten...better(?) in the later books? maybe?

i suppose im wishing that shannon will deliver on this in the future, but im not really getting my hopes up. sophie is very interesting, but the books have always framed her actions as the right ones to take, no matter how terrible the consequences could've been, and they definitely frame the rest of the "good guys" as, well, good people who do good things, which isn't exactly true in most cases. i just...i guess i find it really interesting. i'd also be interested to hear your thoughts on this! on the surface, keeper really does seem like a rather basic series, but it's cool how if you dig even just a little deeper you start getting messy.

hello pyro !! nothing to apologize for, I love rambling! and you are in luck because I happen to have so many thoughts about everything all of the time.

and I agree with you! When you first think of keeper—or at least when I do—I seems very black and white, even bland at times in terms of the interest of the characters and the aspects of their world. Especially when you’re an older reader and have since read more adult books with more complex characters. Which is common. Because these are middle grade series and there’s more limitations of what topics authors can reasonably cover. They’re being careful. Because their audience are young and impressionable and despite their best efforts may be influenced subconsciously. So they have to lay things out more clearly, explaining that actions are bad when adult readers can put that together themselves.

(I know there are a lot of younger people in this fandom so let me clarify: I am not saying you are incapable of critical thought. However, thorough analysis becomes easier with experience, and adults and older readers will often have more experience with this than you. We’ve also had more time to figure out our own opinions and morals. This is not meant to put you down, just remind you that there are inevitable differences between us).

Back to what you were saying, pyro, despite its appearance, when you take a closer look there’s actually not a lot of black and white—or at least not as much as you’d think. I know there’s a canon line where Sophie says something like “the Black Swan were…the good guys?” (paraphrased from the first book). Which makes sense because at this point in time she’s twelve, where it makes sense for her to have that very black and white mindset. Good and bad. Pleasant and unpleasant. it’s a very all nothing mindset, which I know I also had at that age. But as she’s grown older in the series, she’s thinking about things from a more mixed perspective. She’s bargaining with herself and deciding what’s worth what and if the consequences are worth the risks, making decisions she likely would’ve condemned earlier in her life. Like setting the storehouse on fire. That’s a very loaded and controversial decision from her. It’s neither good nor bad. It accomplishes something she wants—sending the Neverseen scrambling and setting them back—and she decided that was worth the consequences—burning potential information and doing something that might’ve been previously against her morals. It’s not the “right” decision to make. It’s just the decision she makes.

We see this a lot with Black Swan too. I’m actually going to bring their oath into this: “I will do everything in my power to help my world.” It seems simple and straightforward at first, but thinking about it, there’s no qualifications for what “help” means. And there’s no limit on what they’ll do, just that they’ll do it if they’re capable. This leaves it open for a lot of morally questionable decisions, like creating Sophie. Did creating Sophie help their world? She’s already started to make positive changes (like at Exillium) and she’s not done yet, so you could say yes she’s helping. And they were capable of bringing her into existence. So they did. It was in their power and it helped, so they did. Despite using Emma’s body, despite forcing Sophie into this situation.

with the Neverseen, they seem more like misguided anti-heroes (if I’m using that term right), doing “bad” things for “good” reasons. Fintan is making these bold statements and undermining the council, actions viewed as negative, to try and highlight the unfair discrimination in their system and reform it—a motive one could consider reasonable and positive.

as for the council, the most notable event this applies to is Sophie’s ability restrictor in Everblaze. This was not supported by everyone else, actively hurting out main protagonist, but their reasoning was generally sound. Sophie had already broken several laws at this point as was causing unrest in their society, the one they’re supposed to govern. And she’d used her abilities yet again to go against those rules, this time with incredible serious consequences. So if she refuses to listen, what do you do? Take away those abilities. Keep her from hurting this society further. There are more specific examples of this, like Oralie and Kenric’s cache, but this is getting long so i can talk about those later if you’d like /g

part of what is intriguing about these characters is how they’re not so black and white on the surface despite the world seeming to be so easily divided into good and bad, so it’s fascinating to talk about how those parts are actually displayed. You brought up a lot of really good topics and I love talking about this!! /g

if you’d like me to expand on any specific part more or have more thoughts of your own to share, you’re more than welcome to send another ask <33