#HYNMYStory

[hamatoyangnekomaoyin-blog]

TMNT S/O HeadCannons Self Harm 2/4 (Leonardo)

So being a person who formerly struggled with self harm I wanted to write some Head Cannons on how the boys would each react to finding their S/O’s scars for the first time. It was a pretty good Sunday you were in the small Dojo Leo had put together a few months back when he finally got tired enough of his brothers pranks and shenanigans during his training, which just so happened to be non-stop. Everyone else was out for lunch today. They were supposed to bring the two of you back some food but honestly it was more likely Mikey would finish it off before they were even half way home. You were taking your recent events out on a punching bag, which was better than the normal being yourself. Leo gave a soft chuckle as he came in, "So what did Raph say? Or was it Mikey this time?" You gave a soft grunt and went back to hitting the dummy in front of you instead of the one behind you. The last thing you needed was him prodding.... He always did though, and you knew it was inevitable. Suddenly you felt your body being pinned to the soft padded floor by a huge weight. You gave a louder grunt this time the wind getting knocked out of you as you tried to push him off. He softly chuckled "You left your back open for attack you need to be more cautious when training "student"" The way he said it made you roll your eyes you knew he wouldn't get off unless you said it... He could be such a dork... "I'll just punch the right dummy next time "Sensai"" His face lit up with a goofy smile and quickly let you go and smirked. "Much better.....So let's see if you can even hit this dummy!" He softly taunted before chuckling and taking a defensive horse stance ready to defend against your attack. You rushed in sending blow after blow only for each blow to be blocked by his large hands and arms. Each blow releasing some tension but each block piling on more than what was released. You kept going till it happened you hit your breaking point. Your fighting suddenly became uncoordinated aimless blows with little to no precision one after the other till tears began to roll down your cheeks as you weakly punched his chest. He looked down at you baffled and confused as you dropped to your knees crying "I can't even do this right.....I really am a mistake...." Leo looked down at you overwhelmed did he trigger this? Was it his fault? When had this started? And many more raced through his mind... It wasn't then till he remembered the snapping noise he kept hearing around the base and then he noticed the rubber band on your left wrist.... It just hit him what was going on... He really could be clueless sometimes..... He quickly grabbed the back of your head his hands in your hair and he pulled you to his chest holding you close. "I...I had no idea honestly..... I....I...I'm sorry....I wish I could have been there for you... Maybe it wouldn't have gotten this far and deep....." He said holding you to his chest. His sudden grip on you was surprising at first but then it made much more sense as he held you closely..... Your sobs slowly turned into sniffles as he held you close your head slowly falling and rising with each breath he gave.... Then the words came... So sincere and worried.....your head bounced softly with each stutter. You slowly looked up at him wrapping your arms around his neck "There was nothing you could have done....." "You can always do something....." "Not for me...." "So I'm not enough am I?" "I didn't say that......" "You implied it, whether you realize it or not......." You softly sighed, you were afraid this would happen... He hated you didn't he... How could anyone not, you were just a worthless piece of garbage after all.... Hell they only thought so highly of you because you were one of the only humans they had ever met, they never had to deal with bullies or the real world they could never understand..... He softly frowned "I don't hate you.... I know it's what you're thinking..." "How would you know what I'm thinking!?!" You yelled snapping again.... "Because I've already been through this......" You froze looking up at him there was no way he was implying what you thought he was.... Was there? "What the he'll does that even mean!?!" He softly sighed pulling you close again locking his arms around your torso so you couldn't break free as he pressed his face into your hair. You struggled at first, you always fought losing battles.... You finally submitted and let him hold you... You hated to admit it but it was nice.... "The pain only helps for so long.... It gets dull and you want more and more until you end up ending the pain all together...." You took short breaths you had never seen this side of Leo.... "Why would you do it to yourself? You have everything! Hell your a hero...." He softly sighed before running his hands through your hair.... "Even heroes break honey...." He softly put his arm on your left shoulder and ran it down your arm slowly and gently with a lose grip ..... You could pull away at any moment but you didn't want to... He had the right to see..... His hand slowly took off the band then started to unwrap the tape. His stomach clenched as he saw your bruised and welted wrist.... It was scarred and raw.... He pulled you close again suddenly standing and letting go he turned and left. You were so confused why hadn't he done anything.... Did he even react? Your pondering was ended when the door softly opened he sat down in front of you and grabbed your hand gently tending to the beaten and wounded skin. He slowly wrapped a soft cloth bandage around it and then your tape.... He placed the band in your hand and rubbed his eye... "I can't stop you..... But please don't break my heart.... I love you and I couldn't live with myself knowing you were doing this....." You nervously swallowed, your throat felt dry and raw like it had a lump in it before you broke into tears and tackled him wrapping your body around him. You rubbed your cheek against his and snuggled into him. "I love you.... I'll do my best... Do you think maybe if I start craving again.....we could talk?" He pulled you into a sweet embrace and sniffled..... "Of course we can.....my "student"....." You let out a snorting laugh and pushed his face away "You big dork....." "Not as big as you...." "Oh yeah?" "Oh yeah..." This is my second Fanfic / Tmnt S/O Head Cannon and I would love feedback on it! This is @alphamaoyinrp signing off!