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snekdood · 8 months

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"if we make america worse and more of a dictatorship that will be even harder to unravel and make it the way we want the country to be, maybe then everyone will join our Glorious Revolution!" bb girl you cant even be in the same room with someone who thinks you should vote, how in tf do you think you're gonna unite people to fight in The Revolution with you? it's gonna be you and your 5 friends, i hate to break it to you.

#i dont think you realize how repelling you and your politics are to everyone else #you get all of your validation for how Smart You Are from your friends and ignore any kind of feedback that suggests you should #change or do something differently. thats the only reason you're so convinced average people will go along with you bc you keep getting #affirmation from the people who ALREADY agree with you- but you have NO IDEA how to bridge the gap between people who agree #with you and disagree with you. you're horrible at convincing people of your side of things outside of straight up guilt tripping them #or bullying them like a highschooler. im sorry but the tools you learned to survive with as a kid aren't gonna help you in this situation.#the ONLY THING you can come up with to bridge that gap is a bloody revolution. thats how bad you are at this.#and you're also so bad at this and unimaginative that you dont even realize how THAT might not even be enough.#you cant imagine ANY kind of avenue to getting people to change AT ALL outside of blood and fire. and thats why people call you #an authoritarian.#i'll be honest- i really do think the world would be a better place if we did incremental change under a democratic president who wont #set the world on fire vs the godkingemperor republican WHO WONT EVEN LISTEN TO YOU AT ALL EVER AND MIGHT KILL YOU #FOR PUTTING UP A STINK. idk if you noticed but if that evil fuck gets into office we are severely outnumbered if he gets police #n shit to go after his own citizens. letting trump win is making this battle so much harder than it needs to be.#you are choosing trying to fix the world while its exploding vs trying to fix it before it explodes at all.#what is this like a procrastination thing? you wanna wait till the last minute to try? idfgi. wtf is wrong with you #throwing minority lives away to prove a point. and then you try to tell me you care. gtfoh.#accelerationists should never be taken seriously.

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mewtwo24 · 9 months

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I finally finished reading the fourth volume of svsss in full, and thing is--the first time through I only read the bingqiu content because I was ravenous for more of their happy ending.

Turns out that was a perilous mistake.

Because I started reading the airplane extras. And I swear to god. MXTX is trying to kill me

What do you MEAN demon lord Binghe was sitting on his big fucking throne. All stoic and forbidding. Surrounded by his demon generals who don't know shit about human courtship. Asking them what he should do, fully demoralized by constant rejections from sqq, only to have airplane tell him to act more pathetic and needy. Which is already hysterically funny and insane, UNTIL LBH'S RESPONSE IS THIS, KILLING ME INSTANTLY:

LUO BINGHE. WHY DOES HE SAY IT LIKE: "I already tried that, didn't work--nothing works :/ not mean, not maidenly, not housewife, not spicy, not capable disciple. Is doubling down on clingy really all it will take? What's a born hater with only one love in his life to do????"

The dichotomy of him sitting there like 'how can I reach the unfathomable depths of shizun's heart?' A HEART HE'S ALREADY WON OVER, MIND and then in the Holy Mausoleum solving the puzzle without blinking and being like 'oh yeah you just have to hit the acupoints, no sweat.' Literally the comedy writes itself I'm so--

How am I supposed to be normal about this. MXTX understands the juicy quintessential queer joy of a person with the world's power at their fingertips wishing only for love. Willing to do anything to earn that love, when unbeknownst to them it's already been freely given. Totally not screaming and yelling and clawing at the walls

And that's not even touching airplane's uproarious account of events. The way he's like 'lol what's next, lbh and sqq are best friends now? smfh' only to see lbh TACKLE SQQ LOVINGLY. FOR SQQ TO BE BASHFUL ABOUT IT BUT SO SO FOND OF THE LITTLE SCAMP. This when we've been experiencing sqq's constant inner monologue of 'I'm so cool and so dignified about my role, truly the epitome of propriety and poser-level fortitude.' Meanwhile, in their universe:

Airplane constantly flaming???? Sqq and lbh in his observations????? His absolute bewilderment and confusion????? Legendary. No notes every single second of this shit was hilarious.

Airplane's comment that sqq + older adolescent lbh traveling together was just watching a couple in their honeymoon phase. OR the fact that lbh is exceedingly petty and refuses to share their food in the wake of airplane's interruption of their time together, until sqq relents sheepishly and insists airplane eat what's left (ONLY AFTER PLACATING LBH WITH MORE FOOD FROM HIS PLATE, SOBBING)

Watching airplane salivate over Mobei-Jun and acting like that's totally normal behavior. Finding out mbj and airplane got together first. Finding out sqq encouraged airplane. LIKE THIS. WHILE HE IS STILL IN DENIAL ABOUT HIS OWN FEELINGS:

Mobei-jun clearly thinking their arrangement is a forever thing, heartbroken his human abandoned him with all the hapless fury of a scorned wife swept away by false promises of fidelity. Airplane writing demons to be the type to beat up their crush lovingly and still unable to connect the dots about mbj's feelings. Mbj letting him go and respecting his wishes, only relenting when there's indication airplane was poorly processing his own feelings and didn't actually want to leave. Mbj caring for him and listening to him as soon as airplane voices what he needs directly and with clarity. None of these gays are functional and it's everything to me

Unrelated, but I physically can't hold this information in anymore:

I'm still reeling from younger lbh having his sexual awakening from the image of sqq wrapped in the immortal binding cables. Condemn me as you like he was so, so real for that.

And no I will not be taking any comments about how luo bingge couldn't bear to see luo binghe cherished in ways he never got to have and all the haunting implications of that. I will also not be taking any comments about luo binghe's instinct to look for sqq in that alternate universe, only to be shaken to the very core to be unable to find his shizun anywhere. The unspeakable and latent horror of his relentless mind likely piecing together what happened, but unable to say it; to suspect what is true, and live with the harrowing confusion of his double's actions. To blame himself, to assume that he had let his anger get the better of him in that world and result in unspeakable folly...

I also refuse to talk about how heartrending it is to hear Tianlang-jun weakly say "In the end, I really can't bring myself to hate humans." The implication that the foolishness of that hope and bright-eyed fondness--the very thing that put him through such unspeakable agony--couldn't be beaten out of him entirely. To discover that his faith in Su Xiyan hadn't been misplaced, to the contrary: his beloved hadn't scorned him at all, but rather fought to the miserable end to protect the fruition of their genuine feelings of love when she couldn't protect tlj or herself.

How MXTX has sqq deliberately draw parallels between their situation and that of ygy+sj and tlj+sx; desperately wishing it might not be too late for them. The concept of breaking cycles of abuse and harm pervasive throughout the newly devised story, how it evolves for the better only when love takes the place of power, pride, and domination. How the moment sqq chooses vulnerability instead of saving face, the genre shifts to the so-called "cringe" girly genre where most if not every character is more fulfilled, more true to themselves. How the "male-oriented" former genre was aimlessly sensationalized and sexualized, how it was a sustained performance of aspirational toxic masculinity. How men objectify other men without end. All of the unspoken gendered implications that come with that.

Anyways. Going to go put my head in a sandbox and try to process everything I just witnessed because even a second reading is not enough to find a modicum of closure.

#svsss #bingqiu #moshang #i swear to god this series is just 'gay man who doesn't know shit inflicting his delusional reality on everyone else and inciting chaos'#and literally it's slapstick levels of hilarious every single time; mxtx never change #also i fully agree that we did not get NEARLY enough mobei-jun and sqh/airplane content #the amount of mental illness to mental illness communication going on there was astonishing #mobei-jun being afraid of his uncle and bringing sqh because that's the only person he trusts fully (WAILING NOISES)#sqh having a tantrum but running away because for the first time he was honest about his needs + his dissatisfaction with catering to other #how that reflects his narrative compulsions and how he felt forced to warp more creative story paths for the sake of survival as a writer #how sqq's restoration of much of his original intent--as well as mobei-jun's acceptance of his needs--helps airplane begin to heal #how his happiness begins; how just like sqq he wanders in such confusion and denial before he's forced to realize what truly matters to him #SHREK VOICE: STORIES HAVE. L A Y E R S #it feels like modern day shakespeare and when i say that i don't mean it in a hollow elevating sense i mean it more like #mxtx just hits that perfect balance of poignance but also hilarious concentric circles of botched communication and brainworms #okay but real talk for a minute? .........;-;#the way lbh constantly struggles with such a crushing feeling that he'll be abandoned over any little mishap/thing/problem #really hit me where it hurts??? if only because its so clearly an anxiety that stems from original goods' upbringing #the way it becomes even more heartrending when you think back to all the sect leaders clamoring that he should have been killed as an infan #that he should have been aborted as a fetus--insisting right in front of him that his birth was a mistake and a disgrace #over having demon blood in his veins. like my god that scene is so viscerally upsetting i struggle to read it #the way its so easy to see the demons as a manifestation of otherness in precipitated form #how both sqq and sqh are influenced by human rhetoric without evening meaning to--assuming the worst against their better judgment #how both sqq and sqh both struggle with their own otherness in different ways and only find solace when they begin to accept who they are #how their lovers (lbh and mbj respectively) both are willing to navigate those confusing waters with them #how both demons love them as they are--accept them as they are despite how difficult forgiveness of perceived betrayal is for them #ty mxtx for changing my brain chemistry #as i get older i have such a fondness for the messiness of thematic queer self-discovery and growth into self-acceptance #that and how youth can so easily be defined by perfectionistic self-harm and the violence of repression

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wonder-worker · 3 months

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"It is too easy to dismiss [Leonor of Navarre] as an overambitious schemer who would do anything to obtain a crown, shedding the blood of her own siblings and her subjects in order to attain the throne. However, a deeper investigation of her long lieutenancy and ephemeral reign shows a woman who fought tenaciously to preserve her place but also worked tirelessly to administer a realm which was crippled by internal conflict and the center of the political schemes of France, Aragon, and Castile. She tried to broker peace, fight off those who opposed her, repair the wounds caused by conflict, protect the sovereignty of the realm, and keep the wheels of governance turning. Leonor was not always successful in achieving all of these aims but given the background of conflict and the lack of cooperation she received from all of her family members, bar her loyal husband, it is a huge achievement that she survived to wear the crown at all. Many writers have argued that Leonor deserved the troubled lieutenancy, personal tragedies, an ephemeral reign, and a blackened reputation, basing their assumption that she committed a crime that cannot be [conclusively] proven. However, a more fitting description of her would be that of a resolute ruler who successfully overcame a multitude of challenges in order to survive in a difficult political landscape and gain a hard-fought throne.”

-Elena Woodacre, "Leonor of Navarre: The Price of Ambition", Queenship, Gender and Reputation in the Medieval and Early Modern West, 1060-1600 (Edited by Zita Eva Rohr and Lisa Benz)

#historicwomendaily #leonor of navarre #15th century #Navarrese history #my post #I mean...the crime can't be explicitly 'proven' but Leonor DID have the means motive and opportunity; she had the most to gain;#the timing was incredibly convenient for her; and most contemporaries believed she was responsible.#She *did* ultimately act against her brother [Carlos] and sister [Blanca]#Though of course the fact remains that:#1) The final responsibility lies with Juan the Faithless: he was the King; the one in power; and the one who rejected Navarre's succession #Blanca herself - while criticizing Leonor and Gaston - placed the ultimate blame on their father as her 'principal...destructor'#All three siblings were reacting to an unconventional disruption in the system caused by Juan & their actions should be judged accordingly.#2) I am hesitant to believe accusations of 'poison' as a cause of murder given how that was commonly used to slander controversial women #and given how it contributed to the dichotomy of Blanca as a tragic beautiful heroine and Leonor as her scheming ambitious sister #3) Even if Leonor DID commit the crime (imo she was at the very least complicit in it) she is still worthy of a reassessment.#I don't think it's fair for it to define her entire identity #Because it certainly did not define her life - she lived for decades before and would live for decades after #It was on the whole one of the many series of obstacles and challenges she had to face before she succeeded in ascending the throne.#The fact that she died so soon after IS ironic but it is in equal parts tragic. And we don't know what Leonor herself felt about it:#Did she think it was a hollow victory? Or did she feel nothing but satisfaction that she died as the Queen of Navarre? We'll never know.#Whatever the case: given her circumstances the fact that she survived to wear the crown itself was an achievement #It's funny because Woodacre parallels Leonor to Richard III in terms of 'blackened' reputations for 'unproven' (...sure) crimes #(thankfully she admits Richard has been long-rehabilitated; what she doesn't bring herself to admit is that he's now over-glorified)#But I don't think this parallel works at all for the exact reasons she uses to try and reassess Leonor #Namely: Richard was the one in power. He was the King. The ultimate blame for what happened to his nephews was his own.#and moreover: Richard's actions against the Princes DID define his reign and were exactly what provoked opposition to his rule.#Any so-called 'rehabilitation' that doesn't recognize and emphasize this is worthless #also if we want to get specific: the Princes were literal children who did nothing and were deposed in times of peace.#Carlos and Blanca were adults with agency and armies and Leonor's actions against them took place in the middle of a civil war #So ultimately I think Leonor's case is fundamentally very different and I don't think her comparison holds well at all

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mishy-mashy · 3 months

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#LOOK AT HIMMMM #i feel like im the only person going rabid over this guy #look at him hes so cute #hes so cute but also really hot too #look at that lip. THAT SMILE. HES CUTEE #the most normal guy on the vestige lineup bc everyone who wields ofa is crazy somewhere in them #meanwhile bruce could actually have been collateral damage with kudos OFA time #figuring out how it works? bruce come here. pass it back and forth. oops. you got your factor absorbed into this one #tho bruce did pass it on so really. even tho hes collateral he did end up holding it at the end #everyone with ofa can have some screws loose but bruce is just a normal guy #[my common sense] vs [Leader's rabid willpower and ideas] became [the last thing Leader left and entrusted to me before his death]#and its the embodiment of yoichis will. now its yoichi and kudos combined will #spoilers #bnha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #mha #bruce #meme #bruce is normal but also crazy in some places too. he just acts and looks normal and we didnt get to see him enough to have it visible #bc bruce had immovable will himself and acted suicidal whenever kudo got involved #[Oh im gonna fight AFO in this closed sewer when i know i have no chance bc Leader is shocked and too close]#mister [Leader and the rest of the resistance is dead. i must fight AFO myself]#sir im pretty sure there was some suicidal feelings involved in that decision #man kills your friends so you pass on what Leader left you so you can go find that guy and try fighting him too?#SHINOMORI ADMITTED HE KNEW THE MOMENT HE GOT THE FACTOR HE STOOD NO CHANCE. IMAGINE BRUCE WITH HIS WEAKER VERSION OF OFA #AND HE STILL RAN OUT TO FIGHT THE STRONGEST MAN IN THE WORLD WITH MAYBE 2 FRIENDS #HE WAS CRYING THEN. BRUCE HAD TO HAVE BEEN SOME BROKEN MAN OR SOMETHING #he was the probably the last one to survive in the resistance. imagine being him. id feel suicidal too #maybe bruce was just out with the last members and AFO found them in search of the Factor. or while erasing everything kudo left behind

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werebutch · 4 months

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My mom getting a new place is kinda making me anxious I think she thinks I’m gonna move in w her instead of my dad 😭 and I’m not sure why I don’t want to. Cuz she’s way better. But I don’t. And I feel responsible I think and plus my sisters will never favor my mom over my dad… so we’d live apart. but I’m 20 years old I can live whatever I want. But. But but but

#idk I really like our house too. it’s great. it’s exactly my style. I would miss it LMAO #but again my mom is just.. she’s so much more organized and she and my stepdad actually get stuff done #and take care of themselves. living w her would be more like we’re roommates and not how it is w my dad #who needs to be taken care of and doted on like a child. my sisters too but I don’t think they’d survive living without me at my dads 💀#or they’d be really pissed at me. at the least #my dads house is constantly horrible so messy so so so bad no free counterspace anywhere can barely walk thru the house and cat vomit #everywhere. unless I take care of all of it. I can’t have company over unless I know a week in advance so I can make it look like a normal #house. and at my moms it’s never like that. it’s messier than average sure but it’s never disgusting like that #people are always telling me not to do anything and let my family learn to clean up after themselves but if I don’t it will just get worse #and worse. they’ll wait weeks before doing anything. it’s embarrassing. and depressing. if I let it go long enough I am miserable every day #after being homeless or on the verge of homelessness for 10 years my dad can’t even appreciate the fantastic house we have 😭#he has to fuck it all up. it’s not 100% his fault bc my sisters do fuck all but he DID teach them to be this way. the only reason I do #anything is because I snapped out of planning to kill myself and realized that I needed to be there for my sisters. so I started being like #their parent more and more. but they still never learned to unload the dishwasher or take out the trash without screaming about it.#I’m just very overwhelmed and nervous about this move. I also feel horrible as if I’m disappointing my mom if I don’t move in. I don’t want #to disappoint her any more than I already have..#she is soooo excited about giving me a room the basement so I can have my bunnies there..

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dreamieparadise · 3 months

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Can- can I ask about the Somali pirates?

Hi hi, Lili! Yes, of course. Tbh I shouldn't have called them "pirates" they are known as such and treated like villains, but they're more like unofficial naval guard! The official naval guard was disbanded in the 90's due to the civil war that broke out [btw this civil war is why I'm diaspora! My maternal family fled to Djibouti or elsewhere. My dad came to Canada due to it.] Anyway! Other nations took advantage of this as they tended to do and started fishing illegally in the waters! Somali citizens rely on fishing to live [also farming and agriculture bc I also recall there was a drought and famine going on] so they turned to "piracy" to stop these thieves from stealing from them! Of course, these outsiders didn't like it and called it "piracy." they shouldn't be there in the first place!!!

BFJRKRKRKR I TALKED IM THE TAGS AND REACHED THE LIMIT I AM SO SORRY LMAOOOOO

Other than Puntland there is also Jubbaland ok lol I love talking about my people's history too much

#momo's fantastical replies #so anyway I saw other Somali ppl calling them the naval guard and jumped on it #but I have always gotten heated when ppl treated Somali Pirates like villains #but iirc even South Park defended them? lol they even got ppl speaking Somali in it!#talking about how they did this for survival!#lili #lixenn #also yeah sure they fuck ppl up but I consider this a 'fuck around and find out'#stop taking advantage of poor countries!!! especially when they are due to outside meddling forces!!#random but somalia makes me so sad bc of how destablized it is #somaliland is a lot more peaceful and has been but recently its gotten more dangerous due to #Somalia's destablization #djibouti seems fine as ever tho lol happy for them but wish somalia would fuck off already [with somaliland]#lili if you are wondering djibouti/somalia/somaliland and parts of kenya and ethiopoa #ethiopia* are all where Somali ppl are from #the parts of K and E were stolen while Somali ppl were getting colonized [so fuck Kenya and Ethiopia too tbh! who does that?]#but all 5 places are why Somalia's flag is a 5 point star! this siginifies we are all one #its funny bc Somaliland was a country before Somalia but then joined Somalia bc of false promises Somalia made #anyway the false promises was unity but the president/dictator named Mohamed Siad Barre #was all 'we should all band together...and kill Isaaq tribe! true unity after for real though'#and then Darood and I a few other major tribes tried that #Isaaq survived but there was in fact a genocide #they fled to what is Somaliland today! apparently they keep the bullet holes in the structure to remember what Darood/Somalia did #bc to these day these bitches deny it #diaspora somali ppl from somalia are especially insistend of this and im like...you stupid puppet you werent even there #I know this despite being Darood bc my parents arent puppets and also my mom is Isaaq tribe #what else? oh there are other places as Somali ppl within Africa become disapora #so strange right?#there is also Puntland [based off the ancient land that is said to be Ancient Somalia--#fun fact our queen from that time named Queen Arrarwelo was said to be friends with Queen Sheba of ancient Ethiopia]

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newvegascowboy · 4 months

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I was kinda Jesting about it a little bit ago, but Killian and Shaun just have the potential to have SUCH a fucked up relationship. Shaun, the guy who considers the death of his mother to be collateral damage, who was going to free Killian as a social experiment, who finds out his dad takes off into a grief induced drug haze and becomes a raider overlord for a little bit. VS Killian, the guy who straight up tells him to his face "I love you, but I never should have been your father, and the parent who could have saved you is dead". Killian who realized he couldn't be the kind of father a child deserves wayy too late, but having a wife and kid was kind of all he had. Shaun who has to contend with the realization that his dad thought it was a blessing that Shaun and Nora were "dead". Killian who realizes he's done the exact same thing his parents did to him. DELICIOUS.

#fallout #kal talks #killian #shaun #killian was an addict before the bombs fell and hid addiction is very much a parallel to how the us army treated soldiers #in Vietnam #in which soldiers would become addicted to drugs that were freely available in country and then have access to Zero recovery resources #once they were shipped home #also like. no resources for PTSD therapy lol #and Nora KNEW. she just didnt say anything #told herself it was fine unless he brought it home #and he didnt for a while. until he did. and they separated because of it. they were only briefly back together because killian promised #to recover #and then yk. bombs.#nora is rightfully frustrated with killian because of Killian's lack of initiative #SHE asked him out SHE proposed SHE wanted a baby. but she never communicates this frustration to him until like The Fight they have #*she never communicates this until The Fight they have where she decides to take off and take shaun #like dgmw killian genuinely mourns nora and shaun when he believes they're dead but a part of him is relieved #that they dont have to try and survive in what the world has become #and a big part of his character arc as a whole even beyond the redemption aspect of atoning for the Overboss thing #is overcoming his depressed and pessimistic world view #that the world IS worth something #that there is hope and we must try to make the world better #because if we dont then it will be just as bad as you believe it to be #facing off with shaun is Killian's final challenge #to look at his son and acknowledge the way he failed him. that killian did not believe in a world where shaun survived and thought #it was a mercy that he 'died'#and they both suffered for it #Killian's gotta face the music and be like 'yeah i failed you and i can never undo that and im sorry. i wish i had been a better man'#'and all i can do is be one now.'

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microwaving-tesilid-argente · 5 months

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scratches head. rereading toy mansion arc and genuinely, how on earth did ephael manage to kill all the children in the mansion in the original storyline.

1. the entrance to the boss room closes the instant the fight starts. there's a bit of conflicting info about when it opens again - toy mansion (ch 23) says that even the boss can't run once the fight has started (more specifically, while fighting is in progress). but dungeon 300 says that the boss can be careless and open the dungeon if they mistakenly believe that everyone has died. maybe the specific condition is that no one has to be in the state of fighting?? so the fight ends once tesilid & ephael give up, even if they're still alive? i believe that once rodrigo gets the chance to, he would've chosen to open the doors open the doors to watch ephael wreck havoc on the other children.

edit: just realised that the "boss fight" started the instant rodrigo first appears and that the whole mansion is the "boss room", nvm

2. tesilid would've beat ephael's ass for that. how did that go. was he running after ephael trying to stop him while ephael was like, opening cupboards checking for kids. is it even possible for ephael to find the kids, much less kill them, if tesilid is trying to stop him? tesilid is much, much stronger than ephael - he brought down the mole in an instant when ephael couldn't do so even with hestio's help. PLUS, if ephael was that determined, i think the only thing that would have effectively stopped him was death. did tesilid have to try to kill him? his own roommate? or did tesilid also give up and help ephael track down the other kids? i don't think tesilid would have - not just because it would go against his stigma commandments, but also because it goes against his own personal beliefs. did ephael knock him out first? or was ephael entering rooms and checking under beds while tesilid was also tracking him down? probably telling him that this was wrong and they should find some other way?

3. isn't the mansion supposed to be big as hell. did ephael really track down every single kid in the whole place to kill them. the round of hide and seek they played in canon (w the monsters as the seekers) is scary but even that isn't as deranged as this. that's messed up. that's messed up. how many children were still alive by then and how long did ephael take to track the last of them down. and if tesilid was trying to stop him, how long did ephael have to run. how long did he have to spend thinking about the blood on his hands and how he was soon planning to take his own life. like. can you imagine. ephael coaxes a child to come out of their hiding spot. he's a stigma bearer from the vatican, so he's safe, he says. the child looks up at him, clothed in white and covered in blood.

#a transmigrator's privilege #the perks of being an s class heroine #ephael chaletino #i would try to write it out but frankly its so messed up #ten year old killing all the other kids #and not even to save himself #and then somehow present day ephael is like. head empty no thoughts. please will we get to see this scary side of him again one day #(no spoilers please)#also also. thinking about that throwaway line at the start of toy mansion #where OG tesilid says that ever since that day he always lost something on the day of sacrifice #how are hestio and ephael still alive. lol.#they survived 10 days of sacrifice somehow #also what on earth did tesilid even have to lose for ten whole years?!???? before he even regresses??#man doesnt even have worldly possessions #did hestio and ephael gain plot armour the instant they survived their original death flag

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yamikawaii · 2 months

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whats fun is looking at the thread youre hanging on by and seeing where it's about to snap. whats even more fun is deliberately cutting through that thread because you know it'll just snap anyways so why bother clinging to it as if youll make it somehow

#im at the point of complete and total apathy #no matter how many ''life plans'' i make itll all end with me killing myself anyways #ive already proven that i cant change so why bother trying #shes right i did go right back to how i was before going away. no actually thats a lie i got even worse ahah #i dont care. i just dont care.#i actually got a library card on my own today. i even reserved some books and just have to wait for another local library to send them over #i even have plans on friday to get an actual id! but yknow what?#i could still jump off a bridge tomorrow without batting an eye.#i dont care about ''making it'' anymore. whats the point when once i die i'll just reincarnate into the world i was supposed to be in?#whats the point when even if i do manage to become a successful person i'll just be cutting myself and planning my suicide either way?#i dont care. i'll put on my favorite outfit and go jump somewhere high enough that theres no chance id survive i dont care.#i'll even bring all my pills and my box cutter with me for good measure #i really dont care. i really think this is gonna be it.#i rethink for a second when i remember how those i love are going to feel but then i remember i wont be alive in this world to see it #i'll see everyone again when im home anyways. if i will it enough i can bring them along and we'll all be happy #and even if i never wake again then even nonexistence will be better than this #i see no real reason not to anymore. i dont have a future that doesnt end in me taking my own life anyways #i really could do it tomorrow if i have the willpower for it. im going to be left alone in the house for a few hours so #no one could stop me #its tempting #and you know me #self-destructively impulsive without a care in the world towards self-control?#we'll see. we will see.#please pray i will make it home everyone.

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coockie8 · 8 months

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Yeah if you need an entire board of doctors and advocates to tell the difference between two things, then the distinctions between said things are not "obvious". If they were, you'd be able to tell the difference on your own, regardless of your knowledge base, as that is sort of what "obvious" means :/

#''there's an obvious distinction between disabled people who need benefits and able-bodied people who are lazy''#''but we'd need a board of doctors and disability advocates to tell the difference between those two things''#yeah you might just be stupid and super ableist actually :/#like my lactose intolerance is *obvious*#regardless of my lack of a medical degree I don't need a doctor to tell me I can't tolerate dairy #I figured that out pretty quick when I get gassy and sick every time I drink milk #''lazy'' vs. disabled is simply not something you can tell visually #hell a non-insignificant chunk of *doctors* can't even fucking tell half the time #how about if someone doesn't wanna piss away their limited amount of time on Earth making someone else rich #we fucking let them just not do that?#capitalist pigs #people who don't understand how we'd be able to survive without money *baffle* me #how do you think we did it *before* money?#How do you think literally every other species on the planet survives without money?#any ''rules'' are made up #humans invented them and we can fucking un-invent them too #I may be a Communist #we're not gonna get into it

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andi-o-geyser · 1 year

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Every day I wake up and want to cry because there is something so comforting yet so unbelievably terrifying about a prequel series that includes characters we have seen in the future because we know that those characters will certainly survive, or at least survive the events we are witnessing in this context, but everybody else has their fate completely up in the air. Will they live? Will they die? Is their absence in the future timeline and inherent confirmation of their death, or will they be fine and is there a perfectly reasonable explanation for why they do not appear with the characters who we know will survive? And that constant hope, that persisting anxiety about their fate holds for their entire time onscreen because we know, we know that their future is not set in stone. So we're fighting against our better nature as the audience to convince ourselves that somehow the characters will survive even when it feels like we should already be grieving their loss. Anyways I'm doing fine mentally and have consumed a perfectly healthy amount of media why are you asking

#for your information this is in fact about star wars. because i am. hyperfixating #specifically commander cody/any rogue clones we meet and basically the entire cast of andor #because for cody we see rex in rebels; even better we literally see him with wolffe and gregor #which separately makes me so emotional cause they survived together dont you GET IT-#im good im fine. moving on #but we don't see cody #and rex even has a nightmare about him and calls out for him so WHAT IN THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN #CAUSE MY SPIDEY SENSE IS TELLING ME THAT MEANS CODY'S DEAD #WHICH OKAY. DEVASTATING. I WILL BE ON LEAVE FOR 4-6 BUISINESS WEEKS GRIEVING THIS NEWS.#but more importantly: HOW #HOW AND WHY IS HE GONE AND WHEN DID IT HAPPEN #did rex get to see him before he died? did cody die 3 years ago or 15?? there's a hell of a lot of time between episode 3 and 4 (/rebels)!#thats a full 19 YEARS of time #so WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED #AND WILL WE SEE IT HAPPEN IN THE BAD BATCH #BECAUSE CODY JUST WENT AWOL BUT IF HE DOESNT LIVE I WILL CRY REAL TEARS #also with andor this is a thing #cassians obviously alive and so is mon and saw and melshi is there too #but we dont see of hear about luthen one bit and bix nor any other characters are anywhere around in rogue one #so i just. want them to be okay so fucking badly #i am in a major mood can you tell :D #star wars #the clone wars #the bad batch #andor #rogue one #commander cody #luthen rael #cassian andor #andis thought geyser

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qserasera · 1 year

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on the downside, my body thought it was still on ‘get up for the school bus to elementary school time’ and woke me up a little after 6:30 morning time

on the bright side i did just lounge around and read 5 chapters of fic before making breakfast

#how did i even survive elementary school time we just don't know #it helped that the magical girl cartoons were airing at that time in the morning tho #qserasera storytime #hypothetically in a different universe i would be the kind of type-A personality that wakes up at 6 every morning to run 3 miles before brea

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eerna · 2 years

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How is the finale making you feel ? (World Cup)

So. Fun fact. The arrival of our NT was scheduled for the same time as the finale so we were watching that instead vdjksabvkjasbkjv

#eernask #haruwashere29 #p sure no one is watching the finale the streets are packed with fans to see the bus arrive and it is insane #i'm going out later tonight and idk how i will survive bc i live right next to the square where it's happening #last night croatia fans went destroying property including two wine bottles we left outside so my parents were like HOW DID YOU DRINK TWO #BOTTLES OF WINE LAST NIGHT WHAT THE FUCK GIRL so. my soccer hate is back even before the official end of the cup #fuck soccer

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daz4i · 1 year

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when ww said "this is not my life, I'm no survivor, i only happened to survive"