#HI I'M WEAK FOR CARLOS AND CECIL

[selfdefiined-archive-blog]

“I miss sleeping with you.” uhh cecil @ carlos during the otherworld desert arc anyone

@oflegendaries  //  sharing a bed.  //  accepting + selective.

      “I know querido. I miss that too.” Carlos shifted, stretching one leg across the dusk-tinted desert sand; he pulls the other close, leg pressed against his chest and chin resting on his knee.

Carlos has never been the type to get homesick. It’s not really in his nature. Sure, it’s nice to go home  &&  see his friends, his family, but he loves travelling too much to miss home. For the first time since he was sixteen though, he finds himself homesick. The longing to be somewhere familiar, to be home, unfurls in his chest; it’s an aching bruise that lingers somewhere beneath his ribs. It’s as painful as Carlos remembers,  &&  just like before, he can’t do anything about it quite yet.

He doesn’t know how to get home yet, but that’s fine. He can figure it out,  &&  maybe he can come to terms with Hydra’s presence in SHIELD too. Maybe he can learn to deal with surge of icy fury  &&  sick betrayal everytime he thinks about what happened. There’s the guilt too, when he thinks about the way his research could’ve been used to hurt people.

Carlos can’t think about that right now though, so he sets it aside in favor of focusing on Cecil. “I miss you so much.”

[mbirnsings-71]

Episode 11, Wheat & Wheat By-Products:

- "I like to butter up a piece of bread, and then rub the imaginary corn along it and then sprinkle it with a little bit of salt and cayenne. Boy is that a delicious, and low-carcinogen, summer treat!"

- "We asked Carlos about our inability to experience tectonic shifts. Carlos, lovely Carlos, had previously recorded other massive tremor activity underneath our city. His response was a few seconds of stammering, followed by a sigh and slow head shake. His eyes were distant, distracted, yet beautiful. I asked him where he got his shirt. It fit him so well. He said he would look at his notes and computer models and see if he could figure out what was going on. I don't know if he listens to me sometimes."

Episode 14, The Man in the Tan Jacket:

- "Ladies and gentlemen, if you care for your community, your town, your Night Vale- like I do - you will arm yourselves. You will rally your neighbors to militia. You will point fingers at those who do not wish to fight and have them rounded up into pens. This is no time for the weak."

- "And remember, Night Vale is at war. Your careless talk costs lives. They know we are here, and it seems somebody talked. Who was it, Night Vale? Was it Steve Carlsberg? Did Steve Carlsberg talk? Maybe a group of good citizens should go have a chat with Steve and find out what he's been saying... and to whom."

Episode 15, Street cleaning day:

- "John Peters, you know, the farmer? He reports finding an old oak door standing unsupported by any other structure out in the scrubland. He says that he’s sure it wasn’t there yesterday, or pretty sure anyway. As sure as he can be since the accident. Apparently, there is knocking from the door, as though there were someone from some other side that does not exist in our narrow, fragile reality, trying to get in."

- "Dear listeners, I've been told to inform you that you are to stop looking at the clouds immediately. Stop knowing about the clouds. Intern Stacey tells me in my headset here that they've also been censoring my broadcast. Well, I back our public protectors, and if they say to stop knowing about whatever it was I was talking about, then I'll stop knowing about it."

Episode 16, The phone call:

- "The Sheriff's Secret Police is issuing an urgent message to all citizens. Attention all citizens: Memorize this list. Memorize it now. It will not now, nor ever, be repeated. Memorize this list for your safety and protection. We cannot tell you when or where you will need to know it, but when you do, you will be safe. Here is the list. Memorize. Now."

- "Hazelnut. Mystify. Cuttlefish. Lark. Lurk. Robert. Anglican. Pheremone haltertop marmalade hardware laser pepper release kneecap falafel period chase chaste leggings wool sweater heartbeat heartbeat heart beat. Heart. Beat. Beat. Beat. Beat. Beat."

- "Listeners, guess who called me this weekend?... well, hey. I don't like to talk too much about my personal life here. This is your community news station, not Cecil's personal life station, right? Okay, fine, I'll just say it. Carlos! Carlos, the dark, delicate-skinned scientist who came into our little town and our littler hearts several months ago."

- "Well, I gave him my home phone number quite a while back and he never called. And I didn't think anything of it, right? I mean, sometimes people just don't call and that's okay. Well, to the point. Carlos calls, and I'm like 'Hello?' (like I don't even have caller ID) and he's like 'I need to talk to you. This is important.' And I'm like 'Um... Okay.'"

- "And he said 'Cecil' (just the sound of his caramel voice: 'Cecil') He said 'Cecil, I think time is slowing down in Night Vale.'

- "And then I said, after a slow sip of Armagnac, 'Oh?'"

- "And perfect Carlos said, 'Last week. Seven Days. 24 hours each day. 60 minutes in each hour. That's 10,080 minutes in a week, right?'"

- "'Uh huh. Go on,' I said, trying to sound like someone with a normal pulse and whose palms were not sweating."

- "'Well, I ran some figures, and during that same amount of time in Night Vale, 11,783 minutes elapsed everywhere else in the world. That's more than a full day longer. I don't know what's happening.'"

- "So that's what Carlos said."

- "Listeners, what do you think? I feel like time always slows down when we're together, Carlos and I. Is that what he's trying to say? I feel that way, too. But I didn't say that. I just said. Oh this is bad. I just said: 'Neat.'"

- "Oh how embarrassing. I mean, Carlos is so smart, and he says so many smart things. And I’m not dumb. I like science and municipally-approved books just as much as the next guy. So I can’t believe that’s all I could say to him... 'Neat.'"

- "But I did manage to ask if he wanted to get together sometime and talk some more about this really fascinating subject. He said no, but he needed me to help get the word out and see if anyone has noticed a massive time shift. So that's what I'm doing now. Anything for the scientific community. I'm very into science these days."

- "This may be a bit unorthodox, but I need your help, dear listeners, to determine where Carlos is going with all of this. Let's listen to these together, okay? What do you think he's trying to say?"

- "Cecil, sorry to bother you. I need you to get the word out that clocks in Night Vale are not real. I haven't found a single real clock. I have disassembled several watches and clocks this week, and all of them are hollow inside. No gears, no crystal, no battery or power source. Some of them actually contain a gelatinous gray lump that seems to be growing hair and teeth. I need to know if all clocks are this way, Cecil. This is very..."

- "[whispering] There's something at my door, Cecil. I. I need to go, okay. Call you back in well, I don't know."

- "[whispering] There's a man in a jacket, holding a leather suitcase outside my door, Cecil. He's not knocking. He's just standing in front of my door. I can't make out his face. I'm peering through a crack in the living room blinds. I. Oh no, he saw me."

- "[normal voice] Sorry about that, Cecil. I forget what I was doing. I think somebody came over, but I don't remember who or what for. Anyway, I need to meet you. Are you free tomorrow afternoon? You have a contact number for the mayor and someone with the police, right? It's important I find them. And again, can you get the word out on your radio show about the clocks?"

- "Did you hear that listeners? A date! Let's go to the weather."

- "Well, I just got off the phone with Carlos, listeners, and we have a date. Tomorrow afternoon! It's just coffee, but maybe it's more. Maybe lots more. Who knows?"

- "Carlos did want me to ask if anyone has ever actually seen the Night Vale Clock Tower. I told him that it was invisible and always teleporting, and that's why he can't ever see it. I mean. That seems sort of obvious."

- "Okay, that was unfair. Carlos is a very smart man, and I shouldn't roll my eyes just because he doesn't comprehend basic architecture. He obviously has a lot of other intriguing interests, though. Like clock making! And seismology. And who knows what else."

Episode 18, The Traveler:

- "I’m still not completely sold on there being more than one mountain. It’s possible that the mountain-apologists built a single mountain in order to prove their skewed world view. Not certain, listeners. Not certain. But possible. This has been corrections."

Episode 19A, The sandstorm:

- "Old Woman Josie has not called, but Intern Dana said that Josie updated her Facebook page with an Instagram of some runestones. Dana has been furiously translating these symbols and her best guess is that they say: 'They come in twos. You come in twos. You and you. Kill your double.'"

- "Night Vale, do be careful. I fear this sandstorm to be quite a terrible event. Please stay safe inside, and should you see yourself, I cannot condone murdering yourself. I just do not believe violence is ever the answer. (It is a question. The real answer is far more terrifying.)"

- "Right now, one of the Danas is standing above her own corpse, panting. I cannot tell if she is grinning or grimacing. When I went in, she had clutched in one hand a broken stapler and in the other a printout of this email from... oh god, and this is the bad news I was talking about... an email from Steve Carlsburg."

- "I don't even want to read an email from that jerk, but if printing it out was one of the Dana's final actions, I must honor her efforts. Steve (ugh) So Steve writes: 'This sandstorm is clearly a cover-up. I believe this was a government-created project. Our government has long been participating in cloud-seeding experiments and trying to suppress the people with pharmaceuticals. I believe that this government will stop at nothing in order to-'"

- "Now, you listen here, Steve Carlsburg. You're not saying anything new, Steve. Of course the sandstorm was created by the government! The City Council announced that this morning. The government makes no secret that they can control weather and earthquakes and monitor thoughts and activities. That's the stuff a big government is supposed to do. Obviously, you've never read the Constitution."

- "Without government, we would never have schools or roads or municipal utilities or helpful pandemics or black vans that roam our neighborhoods at night keeping us safe. So please, Steve Carlsburg, I've had enough of your government-bashing."

- "[Kevin's voice] Hello, Hello, Desert Bluffs? What is this studio? Hey there, Desert Bluffs, I don't know if you can hear me. Kevin here. I don't know where I am. It's a radio studio, but the walls are darker, the equipment looks much older. Certainly much dryer than it should be. This microphone was made... when? Have I gone back in time? Vanessa, are you in the booth?"

- "There is a photo here on the desk. It is a man. He is wearing a tie. He is not tall or short. Not thin or fat. He has eyes like mine and a nose like mine. And hair like mine. But I do not think he is me. Maybe it is the smile. Is that a smile? I can't say."

- "And we have this sitting right here on this odd and bloodless desk. So, now, dear listeners, whoever you are, I give you: the weather."

- "Along the way, in the vortex, I saw a grotesque man. A foul devil of a man. And he attacked me. I tried to choke him to death, but I remembered. I remembered what I told you. And I let him live. I let that woeful beast live."

Episode 19B, The sandstorm:

- "The future is what you make of it. Just know that your supplies are limited. Welcome to Desert Bluffs."

- "The Sunbeams also welcome a new owner in 2013 – Strexcorp Synernists Inc. Look around you. Strex. Look inside you. Strex. Go to sleep. Strex. Believe in a smiling God. Strexcorp: it is everything."

- "Lawrence Lavine, out in the Edgertown Development, called in to say that the sand was like sand but slightly different. That if you touched it, you could feel it... twice. Lawrence said he took a scoop of sand into his soft right hand and it was as if he had two right hands. He then held the sand with both soft palms and felt four hands, like one of those foreign gods or radioactive four-armed deer that seem to be attracted to the new Strexcorp distribution center."

- "We are you. Strexcorp."

- "So Steve writes 'This sandstorm is clearly a cover-up. I believe this was a government-created project. Our government has long been participating in cloud-seeding experiments and -'"

- "Let me stop you right there, Steve Carlsburg. You have hit the nail on the head. Say no more. The government is indeed covering up their involvement, or should I say lack of involvement in this sandstorm. Honestly, I don't think the government even knows how to orchestrate a project of this magnitude and of this quality. You need a well-run private business like, say, Strexcorp that has not only the faculties and materials to execute a massive geologic and psychedelic storm but to do so inexpensively and without tax dollars. Why, without Strexcorp, and companies like it, we wouldn't have trade schools, or regulated behaviors or insurance or helpful pandemics or black helicopters. Thank you for your email, Steve. What a great guy!"

- "[Cecil's voice] Hello, Hello, Night Vale? What is this studio? What is this damnable studio? Night Vale, I do not know if you can hear me. This is Cecil, and I do not know where I am. It is clearly a radio studio, but the walls are covered in blood, and instead of dials and buttons on the sound board, there is just animal viscera, glistening under the green LED lights. I hope this microphone works. Am I in hell? Dana. Dana can you hear me?"

- "Listeners, if you can hear the sound of my voice, please contact the Sheriff's Secret Police. There is so much blood, it is seeping into my shoes. There are – oh master of us all, no – teeth scattered across the floor. The window into the control booth is shattered and there is a swath of skin and a fistful of long, clumping hair hanging from a sharp glass point. I do not know if this is even Night Vale. I know that I can hear the sandstorm raging outside. There is a low buzz, and deep hum that might be my own heart ready to tear itself from my chest in horror or grief. I cannot know which. There is a photo, a single photo of a man on the desk here. He is wearing a tie. He is not tall or short. Not thin or fat. His hair and nose are like mine, but his eyes. His eyes are black as obsidian, and his smile. No. It is not a smile. He must be wicked, this man."

- "Hello there, Desert Bluffs! It is Kevin again. I told you I would be back. I don't know where I went, but I think that I met my double. The vortex is gone now, but as I was returning, I passed a man, a man who looked just like me. I smiled and said hello there, friend! I hugged this man, and he hugged me back. We shared a moment in this otherworld."

WELCOME TO NIGHT VALE TUMBLR! I HAVE GOTTEN THE BOOKS! AND THIS’LL BE FUN! I will write up all the Carlos mentions when I finish each of the episode books because I’m just!! AAA!!