#HE WAS NESTLED IN THAT CROWD AT THE END WITH SHAWTYS ON HIS SHOULDERS RIGHT AFTER INTRO PERSONA

[sugaftrm]

… I’m never this person… so imagine how impactful that man is but…. STOP LOOKING AT MY MAN OMFG LIKE PLEASE LOWER YOUR GAZE

[itsallavengers]

The Intervention

“Um, guys? What’s going on?” 

Clint looked solemnly toward Tony, shaking his head sadly as he watched the man stumble forward, brow set in confusion as he took in the setting around him.

The communal living room was filled with all the friends that the team had been able to find, and together, they had procured a large banner and written the word INTERVENTION in big black lettering, hanging it from the ceiling as they all stood solemnly underneath it.

It was time they sorted this. It had reached the limit, and none of the team could handle it any more.

(beware the read more, mobile users!)

“Tony, you know that we love you, very much. Before this begins, we want you to know that,” Bruce said softly.

“Ohhkaaayy,” Tony said slowly, beginning to undo his tie a little as he scanned the room. “Hey, where’s my h-”

“DON’T!” Everyone else in the room suddenly screamed, and Tony jolted in surprise, stumbling back a few steps as he lost his balance. 

“What the fuck is the problem, guys?” Tony asked incredulously, and god, wasn’t that just a punch in the gut to everyone in the room; he didn’t even realise how bad it had become.

The Avengers, who were all stood at the front of the crowd, slowly pulled out sheets of paper from their pockets, looking seriously at Tony as he flailed his hands in confusion, completely unaware of what they were going to have to discuss.

Taking a deep breath, Clint was the first to step forward, glancing down at the paper in his hands and looking to Nat, who nodded solemnly.

They had to do this. For Tony.

“This is an intervention,” he began, before tony cut him off.

“Yeah, I know it’s an intervention, what I’m wondering was what the fuck it concerned-”

“Don’t you see it? Tony, this is pretty hard to miss-”

“There is nothing to miss! I’m fine!” Tony yelled, throwing his hands into the air.

There was silence and the room, and then a collective sigh seemed to ripple across the crowd. “Tony-” Clint began, pausing for a moment, and biting his lip.

“You have got to stop referring to Steve as your husband at every possible opportunity.” 

Tony froze, hands mid-wave, the gold band around his finger glinting in the afternoon light. “What.” “We can’t deal with it any more! Bruce admitted, running a hand through his hair, and then looking down to his sheet. “It was okay at first. When you first got hitched, we were willing to let it slide. it would only be when you two were caught up in each other, and that was okay.That was manageable”

Nat stepped forward at this point, looking at Tony seriously as she read off her page. “Then it started happening more regularly. You’d refer to him as ‘my husband’ when you were looking for him, or when you wanted his attention. A lot of the time, you would do it when he wasn’t even in the room.”

Thor piped up this time, “Tony- we have found ourselves accidentally referring to Steve as our husband just by exposure to your comments. This makes us feel rather odd and embarrassed. It must stop.”

Tony stared at them all, before scoffing. “It is not that bad-”

“You now regularly call him ‘My Star-Spangled Husband’ in your mission reports. Fury had to burn at least five different copies last week alone. Which mean this is now affecting the environment, not to mention the sensitivities of all SHIELD agents that have to go through them,” Coulson stepped forward gravely.

“Oh, come on-”

“There have barely been more than five consecutive minutes of you talking to me where you haven't dropped in a ‘husband’ somewhere, Tony. I can’t imagine how it must be for the team to go through this, every day,” Pepper told him, placing a hand on Thor’s shoulder supportively as he looked on sadly, shaking his head a little.

When the fucking pizza-delivery guy stepped forward to put his word in, Tony finally put his foot down, yelling loudly and slicing his hand through the air to silence them all.

“ENOUGH! Fine! I may excessively call my h- Steve- that. But you know what? I DON’T GIVE A FUCK! He’s my fucking husband, so I’m going to call him whatever I please for as long as it pleases me-”

“Tony, you’ve got to understand how it affects us-” Clint begged.

“What would you rather I called him? Because I can think of a hell of a lot more sickly sweet names than that; what about ‘my love’? Or ‘Cute-Ass’? What about shawty, you think Steve will like that-”

“NO!” Everyone yelled again, and Tony laughed, fingers dancing over the smooth gold band that circled his finger.

He couldn’t even feel annoyed at his friends. He was still riding the post-marrige high, as he had been for the past month.

So instead of yelling at them, he simply skipped over to them and threw himself into the crowd, knowing that they’d keep him from plummeting on to the floor.

“Don’t worry you guys, you’ll all soon have husbands and wives of your own. No need to feel jealous, your time will come,” he promised them, cackling as the whole group groaned in frustration.

“Please, please stop. I’ll pay you so much money,” Clint begged.

Tony looked him dead in the eye, before saying “I’m not sure my husband would approve of that.”

Clint looked like he was going to start crying. Tony cackled again.

“What the hell is going on?” Came a voice from behind them all, and Tony felt an involuntary smile creep up his face as he registered the voice.

“Oh, it’s my husband! Stevie, baby, sweetheart, darling, honey-pie, could-bounce-a-quarter-off-that-ass-Rogers! Listen, my love; our friends are staging an intervention!” He called out delightedly, ignoring the shove he received from Clint in order to turn and run toward Steve, jumping theatrically into his husband’s arms.

“What?” Steve asked confusedly, whilst kissing Tony’s forehead in greeting.

“They’re all grumpy because we’re too affectionate and it makes their emotionally constipated asses uncomfortable,” Tony whispered quietly into his ear.

Of course, at those words, a cheeky little grin spread across Steve’s face, and he looked down at Tony, who was nestled safely in his arms, and cocked his eyebrow. “Oh really?”

“Really.”

Steve looked up, right into the middle of his group of friends, for a good five seconds. It seemed Natasha had some sort of premonition concerning what was about to happen, because she suddenly turned on her heel and left the room very swiftly.

Unluckily, the others were not quite as perceptive. 

“Well, we can’t have them feeling uncomfortable, can we?” He asked, his face straight and deadpan as anything.

“That would just be rude,” Tony agreed.

There was a brief pause, before Steve suddenly lifted Tony out of the bridal-carry and turned him, until his hands were holding Tony up by the ass, lips crashing into Tony’s messily as he moaned. Loudly.

“Mmm, oh, darlin’,” Steve groaned, walking easily with Tony toward the group of people, who quickly started scattering, yelling and moaning in despair as they watched Steve squeeze his hands against Tony’s ass.

They briefly stopped, and Tony took the opportunity to briefly remove his mouth from Steve’s and grab at Clint, in order to pull him in and smack a wet kiss to his lips.

Clint screamed. 

Tony didn’t even get a chance to laugh, before Steve had pulled him back in, continuing to move until his knees hit the side of the couch and they both fell backwards, landing on the pillows with a dull thud. Tony ended up straddling Steve’s hips while they made out obnoxiously loudly on the couch.

The room cleared pretty quickly after that.

For the next month, both Steve and Tony made as much effort as they could to only use pet-names for one another. A ‘sweetheart’ here, a ‘my love’ there. There was even a memorable month or so where Steve called Tony ‘doll’, and Tony answered with a ridiculously accentuated ‘sugar’.  The team groaned each and every time, but it did nothing to deter them.

Eventually, it stopped being a joke. 

Neither of them had called the other by their actual name in years.

____

@ishipallthings ,,, so this happened