#Hürrem embraces it because she's lost so much already

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1.06 / 2.09 (33)

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I know I'm retreading old ground here, but I'll always love Süleiman and Gülfem's little scene in E15, because it reveals everything about both Gülfem herself and her relationship with Süleiman now and going forward. Gülfem's role as a conscience in general and for Süleiman in particular emerges, since when his relationships with his women are put to the test, she is the person he turns to as the first woman he's possibly hurt, as the one embodying that distant past everyone seeks to forget but can't as it always resurfaces all over again (and it's sad and telling that she's remembered only in occasions like these). Gülfem as Süleiman's conscience builds off of Hafsa's, Ibrahim's, Mustafa's and Hatice's isolated moments where they've been consciences for Süleiman yet in this scene it completely distinguishes itself as more of a deeper conscience, privy to Süleiman's inner world in ways we don't know but they themselves do, wholly embracing this moment that's just between them both. But the more her view of what she experienced unveils to us, the more this privyness and understanding Gülfem has for her closest springs forth as the coping mechanism she's developed in order to deal with her circumstances - she loves these people so much, so they're by no means at fault, she is, something has to be missing with her in order for it that devasting end to have come forth (her loss has sadly done a number on her self-worth too: how could someone as ""average"" as her advice Hatice on what to write to Ibrahim??; how could someone as ""average"" as her not be at fault??). She clearly isn't over it (shown by her resentment that occasionally crops up especially in her dynamic with Mahidevran, but also a bit by some of her looks during Mehmet's naming ceremony), but she has to accept it, to go with the flow, to cling to fate and the might of Allah as well (her urging Hatice for them to pray to Allah for Ibrahim in E14, also "When we lost our children* at a very young age, I accepted it as the will of Allah."; it's fascinating how close this brings her to both Hatice and Mahidevran: all three of them lean on fate like that, but Gülfem has experienced something so irreperably final and severe that every sign of something good happening, she'll openly and gladly take it, so is able to see the silver linings in Hatice's experiences that Hati herself can not; both Mahidevran and Gülfem lean on Allah, but unlike Mahi who expects and strives for justice for her suffering that's supposedly outside of Allah, Gülfi lets it go and associates the suffering itself too with Allah, if not with herself), focusing on what she already has, taking it with full hands.

And since that entails the people she supports, the last idea of family remaining to her as SS is so unreachable, and she can't bear to lose them too, the only thing left for her is to love them and idealize them but in different ways and amounts due to her different relationships with them, thus creating a sort of a hierarchy of fondness and idealization: going from Mahidevran (who I guess Gülfem is in good terms with not just due to her good relations with Hatice, but also because she's gotten too used to her as part of the family as well; as an ally, a main part of Gülfem processing everything, so when another person like Hürrem appears who's likely to challenge that status quo, that calm Gülfi has absorbed, she stands behind Mahi, shown in E08; btw, Hürrem too may have also become quite a part of that fondness and idealization line later on, but more about that when I get to S04), to Hafsa (the mother figure for whose will Gülfem's respect is usually absolute), to Hatice (the companion she's closest to, so she's able to give her a lot more empathy and understanding), to finally Süleiman, the last pillar of that hierarchy precisely because he's so unreachable and so dear she couldn't express it until this E15 scene and even then not fully. Even if, along with her understanding of them, she can and has called out others when she feels they're unjust namely due to her fondness of them, Süleiman is completely idealized in her mind, put on that pedestal of everything Gülfem yearns for in her life, of the peace he currently emanates but hasn't gotten from any of his women in return according to Gülfem (and it's interesting that Hürrem comes up promising a calmness to SS after she returns from her exile the same episode). But he won't emanate it much longer and the more her loved ones become disillusioned with him and are then stripped away from Gülfem by him, she starts to notice it in ways she can't deny.

So it's perfect that this scene, the first one that directly verbalizes how much loyalty means to SS especially in terms of his women and presents Gülfem as the first such loyal figure, sets her up as the last and perhaps most striking opposer of that idea. Her final act of defiance only appears sudden; it was always meant to happen like this.