#God im sorry im not doing well

[luminique]

kissing harumasa means keeping your hands on his face and never letting them go down to his neck. he’d even hold them there with his own hands, a silent plea to not touch the mark left by the serum.

he didn’t lash out at you the first (and only) time you unintentionally touched it. instead, he pulled away immediately, the fear in his eyes mixed with his shaky breaths as he’s trying to control himself. he could see his own reflection in your worried eyes, seeing hallucinations of him turning into an ethereal. your hands went to hold his, you could feel him quivering as he shook his head at you. he didn’t mean to ruin the mood, he didn’t want to become a monster. he isn’t a monster but this irrational fear was eating him up whole that it even put your relationship on the line.

“i’m sorry, i didn’t realize what i had done,” your voice was clear as always, guiding him back to the current moment. the reflection of him in your eyes returned to normal but you had a regretful look in your gaze. your thumb rubbed over the back of his hand, reminding him that you were still there. “i love you,” you mumbled out to him, so soft, so quiet. that was all he needed to hear. he knew it was an honest mistake and not intentional on your end, maybe he overreacted. he brought your hands up to his mouth, placing soft kisses on your knuckles. the hands that unknowingly triggered his fight or flight mode, were the same hands that caressed him so gently every time. in between his kisses, he’d say his own ‘i love you’ and ‘i’m sorry’s to try and reassure you of his sudden reaction. he wasn’t deserving of your love, you shouldn’t be the victim of his past, but you stay with him regardless. overcoming it all while holding hands, one kiss at a time.

[silasbirchtree]

"billford is abusive" yeah. fucking obviously

here's the thing: literally no one is making content w the inherent idea that billford is a healthy relationship, or that they Should be together. but it is a genuinely interesting dynamic with tropes that have been enjoyed since literally forever: power imbalances, mortal/god, enemies/lovers etc. and part of the appeal of why their relationship is so interesting is delving into the underlying care/love between them. abusive relationships aren't constantly threatening or scary 24/7 - part of what makes them so easy to fall into is that you really do love and trust this person - which is a realistic portrayal!! the tragedy of it is an idea that has been loved for ages: watching a relationship grow and evolve, even knowing that it still ends badly!! it's interesting and heartbreaking and it is literally just basic antithesis.

this is like basic media literacy can we pleaaase be serious lmfao. it's fine if you don't fw the ship/dynamic but you don't have to come up with a moral high ground for it - and having a dynamic that is explicitly abusive, while also showing the victim to be able to heal with support, in mainstream kids media facilitates further recognition and discussion on abuse which is a good thing.

[jubmato]

guys. guys hear me. out. pelase hear me out im cooking i swear guys ple

[littleplantfreak]

'When', not 'if'

("I'm not a romantic" I cry and scream before dropping the most sickening thing i've written to date. Blame @stunie because i did tell her i would write the most ume thing ever and maybe this is it. The title in my docs for it is 'Fucking disgusting' but i figured i better not title it that here because I'd be seeing it in my notifs lmaoo)

SFW/no cw unless you hate fluff

When you wake up from your nap, one of your slippers is gone, and there's a blanket on you that wasn't there prior. Looking at the clock, it's been about an hour since everyone had left your apartment once your birthday party ended. The day as a whole had been chaotic, your boyfriend shoving you out the door with a note to go see Kotoha.

The note took you farther than that, though, as it seemed Umemiya created a whole scavenger hunt for your birthday that had you running into all of your friends, having dessert at your favorite cafe, and eventually ending up at your shared apartment to find that all that time spent around town was a distraction so that he could set up the space for your party. After it had ended, you were banished to the couch because princesses aren't allowed to help clean up their own birthday parties, which had you huffing and falling face down into the chicken shaped pillow affectionately called Mr.Clucky.

It was a product of your boyfriend's endless cycle of hobbies when he took up sewing. A little lopsided and overfilled with stuffing, you complained to and into Mr.Clucky with your face pressed into him. Apparently, he was soft enough to fall asleep on because before you knew it, you had been drooling on him the entire hour. Prying yourself off the couch took more effort than was almost worth it before your eyes fell on the reason you were so tired to begin with.

Hajime smiles and hums looking at your bleary eyes. "Good morning sunshine, I was just about to take you to bed," he says, folding a dish towel over a chair. You toss off the blanket and grab on the slipper that fell under the living room table before padding up to him. Dipping your hands under both of his arms to lock them together behind him, now your face is in his chest instead of the chicken, which is entirely preferred.

"Don't wanna go to bed just yet," you muffle, sinking even deeper into him when both of his arms wrap around you in support. He smells like dish soap and birthday cake, and you turn your head to hear the heartbeat in his chest.

"What do you wanna do lovey? You know I'd give you the world if you asked," you can hear the rumble of his voice in his chest with your pressed ear. He's cheesy, but half asleep, you feel just as much, if not cheesier.

"I have the world if I have you, they're one in the same. So just you is more than fine." Your eyes are closed, but you feel him shiver a little. "I wanna dance with you, though," you say, voice still soft and kinda raspy from sleep.

"Dunno if I can top what you just said even when I propose," he chokes out a laugh, or at least you think it's one. He shifts his hold a bit and starts leading you both in a lazy sway that starts near the toaster and ends next to the potted plant at the back door before starting over.

"When? Not if?" You tease him, a hand going to scratch the nape of his neck lightly.

"I'll never meet another you, so I'm pretty set on When."

"I'll say yes." Because you will. You can't imagine a life where you wouldn't.

"And I'll still cry when you do." You can tell he's crying now because it comes out shaky and his hold tightens a bit, before you lean back, stopping your impromptu waltz. Both of your hands come up to cup his face and look at his teary grey eyes before cooing at him.

"You big baby! Save those tears for When please. You'll be congested and sniffley all night if you don't stop." You start cleaning off his face with your sleeve, but he stops one of your hands and starts peppering your palm and wrist with small kisses. "I think I'm ready for bed now. Princess's orders," you say, dragging him towards your bedroom. You'll have to figure out tomorrow just how soon When is going to be, but for now you can hear the slow thumps of Hajime's steps as he follows behind you, squeezing your connected hand. It's not pressing in the least, you think, because it feels like there will be plenty of tomorrows too.

-----

When you wake up in the morning, it takes you an hour to realize Hajime had put the ring on your finger while you were asleep.

It takes you five minutes to run through town in your pajamas, barefoot to find and full on tackle him in front of the place he was about to get your breakfast in.

And it takes about two minutes of unintelligible blubbering on both your parts before anyone understands what is going on.

No one timed it, but if they did, it would've taken less than ten minutes for the whole town to find out via texts, calls, and yells down the streets and through windows that you're engaged.

[sieglinde-freud]

let it be known that i love prince inigo with my whole soul. however sometimes it is SO much fun to think about owain and his two most loyal-est knights you ever seen: worst guy in the world #1 and worst guy in the world #2. i love retainer inigo and severa so much. retainers who bully you and make fun of you and trash on you but they’d leave behind everyone and everything they ever knew to follow you and protect you in a whole new universe. they love you so much that they’d swear allegiance to total strangers but that loyalty pales in comparison to what they’d do for you. and they were all lovers!!!!!!!

[tiredbired]

"Apologies. Can you stand? I should really learn to act my age."

[popagan]

‘The rate of which I make art for AO3 fics in the library VS. the rate of me adding in new fics into the library’ makes an unfair battle. 12 pieces in and 90 fics (and counting) in store…. This is not a war I can win….

P.S. I make them simply to decorate my Apple Library with AO3 fics I like (self-indulgence). The drawing is dependent on my mood + what I felt like drawing/trying out, and the content of the fic. It is as subjective as it is NOT indicative of what the fic is like. I highly recommend you check the following fics out yourself.

Links to the fics:

City of Sunshine

see you on the other side;

Like a Promise

All That Hate

Grief

Under the Surface

[humanmorph]

(keith voice) it's different!!!

[pseudophan]

i'm so extremely irrationally annoyed by people not knowing what various terms mean and using them incorrectly like i feel like that's such an asshole thing to care about but oh my god stop

[natsmagi]

honestly the more i hear about engstars and its TLs the more i absolutely dread the inevitable release of poltergeist and what may ensue from it, bc if if the translators themselves are already invalidating arashis identity then i Really Truly do not want to see how theyll translate natsume and tsumugis microaggressions/transphobia towards her. esp since ive noticed a rise in people being comfortably transphobic towards her, and i REALLY do not wish to see natsume and tsumugi being stupid fucking morons be used as evidence to discredit her

and i think this is all the more reason why its VERY IMPORTANT for engstars to DIRECTLY ACKNOWLEDGE arashi and her gender. bc sometimes characters are STUPID and RUDE and APATHETIC. enstars is a story with NUANCED and FLAWED CHARACTERS, and when a character is being a fucking asshole youre meant to PROVE THEM WRONG. but they dont even acknowledge arashi as a girl themselves. so, if you do use engstars, please keep pressuring them bc omfg this is so bad and i can only see it getting worse

[xxplastic-cubexx]

if i had a nickel every time magneto, charles, and amelia were all featured on a cover that framed them as having a wack love triangle then im sure im missing more than just these two but im still baffled i naturally found two so easily anyway

[p4nishers]

thinking about the relationship between mightily oats' "the worthwhile [words] don't burn" and constable dorfl's "the words in the heart cannot be taken"

[fairyofshampgyu]

he’s literally so beautiful and handsome

[butchvamp]

i'm working my way through the final companion quests and i finished Bellara's last night. i feel like my criticism of her story is the same, broader critique i've already discussed which is that she's never really given any time or space to reckon with the truth of the elven gods, she's never allowed any real sympathy or a crisis of faith or even just a genuine conversation about having to literally kill her gods that she's spent her entire life studying... this quest almost gets there, but it's once again... hindered by racism.

i would have loved this quest otherwise, in general Bellara is one of my favorite companions and her character is one of the strongest in the game. plus i like a good sibling dynamic, and i loved her scenes with Cyrian and even the final funeral procession. but the context they're in is frustrating. we don't need to teach Bellara the dangers of pursuing elven history, we already know, she already knew even before this, and now the game has completely demonized the Evanuris beyond a doubt and even blamed Bellara for it herself. we don't need Bellara to "learn her lesson." it's redundant and racist, especially the final choice!

this choice (Destroy the Archive or Preserve It) should NOT be up to Rook. this is when faction and companion approval could have come into play, but unfortunately the reputation system in this game is basically nonfunctional. if it did actually matter, then maybe if Rook has high reputation with the Veil Jumpers, Bellara could ask their opinion, but otherwise, why would she leave the fate of a priceless link to elven history up to Just Some Guy? especially if Rook isn't even elven!

Dalish culture is still valuable, it's worth respect and worth preserving regardless of the Evanuris. this confrontation with Anaris should have made her even more determined to do exactly that, to embrace and protect her culture and explore the truth of their history within the Archive, to share it with her people and keep them safe, rather than just blindly destroy it. this could have been her big emotional catharsis moment, with Rook there to encourage her but otherwise let her be the one to make her own choice and ultimately stop Anaris and save the Archive. maybe Cyrian does always die, but he's her link to the Archive that strengthens her resolve regardless. and depending on how Rook approached it (insisted that she would have to kill him versus encouraging her to try and get through to him) it could result in Bellara either opening up and sharing more about the Archive or hardening and closing herself and the Archive off completely. the funeral procession could change depending as well.

i don't know how the funeral procession changes currently, if you destroy the Archive, but if you save it, i do really appreciate those final scenes with her. we even get actual acknowledgment of the Exalted Marches and the reality of the current elves and their enslavement. Bellara finally gets to express herself and participate in her culture without having to feel guilty or apologize. i just wish she was given this respect beyond this single scene, and that she had more of a voice overall and could challenge both Harding and even Solas, and that the game didn't have to punish her before we got here.

[zer0point5ive]

something about lawrence thinking he’s a little past it, looking at adam and feeling a strange mix of envy and insecurity creep in alongside the fondness, wondering what adam sees in him and then .. well then there’s adam. love hearts in the air, cartoon eyes popping out, hammer on head looney tunes style, the whole deal just. absolutely head over heels over lawrence’s whole .. everything at all times, going cuckoo if lawrence’s shirt buttons strain slightly, grabbing a handful whenever lawrence bends over, burying his face in lawrence’s chest at random intervals because, hey, he never claimed to be gods strongest soldier and boy oh boy. man oh man, lawrence gordon md will do that to a guy. lawrence is just trying to get changed? well you better believe adam’s getting a front row seat to that show and. if lawrence happens to let it slip that he’s been feeling a little inadequate? yeah, adam is absolutely taking that as a challenge. good for them both

[aropride]

this post was a game changer for me. thank you ryan reynolds