#God I've gotta stop writing about Sam today

[chillinglikeashilling]

Ok just finished Adventuring Party.

It's so interesting to me the way Danielle was talking about how she felt bad for Sam because nobody takes her seriously not even Danielle (her actress) and she wanted to honor or give space to what that must feel like.

I'm sure Danielle was exaggerating for the sake of her point (I think she's put a lot of thought and effort into playing Sam) but even though I completely understood that fear as Sam voiced it and it fit how Danielle was playing her, I take Sam so seriously.

Sam talked three (maybe four?) ancient demons into leaving her friends body after a lifetime of them tormenting him, she's so incredibly charming that it's a running bit that ancient magical creatures respond to her (very casual) greetings in turn, she's a person who understands other people so well and is at the centre of all of these social dynamics!

And then Brennan mentioned how lonely it must be to make everyone around you feel like they're special but have people take no notice of your interiority, your pains and fears and needs.

Not only that, because you make everyone feel special, everyone assumes that's a reflection of your feelings about them, that you're light shines out around you like a halo and so of course they feel warmed by it without even noticing that you have left a space for them to shine back at you.

[asirensrage]

for the behind the scenes questions: 8, 10, 18, 25 (there’s a heaven above you), and 30?

Raith! I'm always happy to see you pop up into my ask box. Thanks for asking!

8. Do you listen to music while you write? If so, share a song that’s been inspiring you lately.

Absolutely! I always listen to music and usually have playlists for each of my fics that I listen to when I write. Umm...the last song I was inspired by was Palace by Dessa but it was for this gif set lol. Though, Unholy by Sam Smith was in my head when I was doing smut drabbles earlier today.

10. Do you enjoy writing dialogue, exposition, or plot the most?

Dialogue and plot! I love building up the scenes, especially when things are getting good. I like trying to get readers to react lol.

18. What is a line/scene you’re really proud of? Give us the DVD commentary for that scene.

“I’m not a kid!” “You look like one,” he shot back.  “What am I even going to tell them?” I sat up quickly and glared at him. “That I’m a grown ass woman who earned adult privileges by being an actual adult walking around in a Tammy suit? And that when they treat me like a kid, when they look at me and see her and not me, it makes me feel insane! Like I’m small and breathless and not actually here. How about that Hopper? How’s that sound?” I hissed, trying to not lash out. My hands were shaking. “I’m putting in all this effort every single fucking day for someone else’s life! I might never go back to my own! Or I could wake up there tomorrow and this was all for nothing! I could have ruined this girl’s life!” I suddenly burst into tears. I couldn’t stop myself. I bent over, trying to stop, to just calm down so they couldn’t hear me. It just made it all worse. Something deep in my chest ached at the reminder that I was stuck here and I wasn’t me.  Hopper’s arm went around me, pulling me into his side. “I know ki-Kate. I’m sorry.” He patted my back a couple times and I let out a broken laugh at the attempt. None of this felt worth it right now. “I try…I try so hard,” I said, wiping the tears off of my face even as they kept falling. “It doesn’t fix anything that matters. Why doesn’t it matter?” I cried harder.  Hopper remained silent, but he didn’t move. He just sat there, hand awkwardly on my back until he pulled it away. “It does,” he finally said. “Might not see it now, but it does.” “It doesn’t feel like it.” “I know, but you matter. The little things you do add up Kate and before long, you can see the impact it has on the people around you. Or sometimes you never find out how much something you did or said meant to someone. That’s life. You just gotta live it as best you can, no matter what comes your way.” He paused for a moment. “But I admit, body swap is pretty weird. Don’t suppose there’s any set of directions on how to do that right, but you do a good job, even if nobody tells you. You’ve done right by Tammy, her parents, her classmates and everyone else you stick up for and make friends with.”

This is from Tammy Thompson Takes on the Upside Down. I enjoyed writing this scene because it really gives insight into Kate and the pressure she feels playing Tammy. I wanted to show her how other people are seeing her and I think what Hopper says here is really important for anyone tbh. The little things you do add up and sometimes you can see the impact you have on others, sometimes you can't but that doesn't mean it isn't there.

25. Which idea came to you first in there's a heaven above you (Don't you cry)?

Honestly? It was the idea of time travel without control. I liked the idea that it happens without warning and you have no say where you go or when. Also the idea of waking up on a beach sounds awful and I couldn't resist.

30. Tell us an idea for a longfic you want to write in the future.

Oh god. Every fic idea has turns into a long fic. Okay, it's not new because I've talked about it, but Reality is Fictional is a cooperative fic between me and the readers about travelling the multiverse and the impact it has on someone (as well as playing with the mary-sue trope). It'll be a lot of fun...once I get to it lol.

Behind the Scenes of Fic Writing: 30 Questions for Authors

[void-wolfie]

It’s been a while and I know you’re not really in the mood to write but I hope you’re down to answering some questions. Missed your presence on my home page.

1. What are the three scents you like?

2. What’s your favorite board or card game?

3. What is the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?

4. Have you ever thought of what your future baby will be named?

5. Who is your all-time favorite Disney character?

6. Are you afraid of ghosts?

7. Do you believe that love is blind?

8. What period would you travel to if you were given a time machine?

9. Would you take it if you had the opportunity to be immortal?

10. What makes your day better?

Hope you’re doing well and school isn’t too stressful, if it is do take the time to entertain my silly request. Maybe it’ll be a good distraction. Or not, you can totally ignore me lol.

With love,

- 🥞

really sorry I haven't been in the mood to write lately lol, but hell yeah, I'm always down to talk to my lovely followers

1. 3 scents I like?

vanilla, the smell before it rains, and bonfires

2. favorite board / card game?

we don't play board games very much in my house, but cards games are fun, Uno is always good, Cards Against Humanity, Skip-bo is classic in my house, and if I'm really bored I'll play solitaire on my computer lol

3. weirdest thing I've ever eaten?

not much considering I'm a picky eater (how I ended up with someone who's a chef I'll never understand lol)

weirdest thing though would probably have to be raw octopus, had it a sushi restaurant once when I was like 8

4. future kids names?

honestly I'm so young I haven't really thought about having kids much, I think I'm still in a part of my life where I don't exactly want them, but who knows maybe that'll change sometime in the future

however, considering most of my friends (the girls, not the guys obviously lol) are the type to think about this a lot and it's actually come up in conversation before, I have slightly thought about it lol

I don't keep a written list or anything so here's just a few off the top of my head; Jordan, Alexander, Riley, Justin, Brandon, Brooke, Erik, Sam

5. favorite Disney character?

ughhh, this is so hard why would you do this to me 😭

if I had to pick I'm going to sayyyyyy, Baloo from The Jungle Book, I used to watch that movie so much as a kid

however, Mushu (Mulan) and Genie (Aladdin) are close seconds

6. afraid of ghosts?

honestly, I feel like it would depend on the ghost, if it's evil I'm running the hell away, if it's nice I'm pulling up a chair and asking it every question I can think of lol

7. is love blind?

wow, this is a tough one... honestly I'm not sure. I think that maybe, sometimes love can blind people, but I wouldn't say that's the case all the time. I think it just comes down to the person and the situation.

8. when/where would I travel to if I had a time machine?

oh god, so many places

first stop would probably be the Renaissance (England), kings, knights, swords, and jousting? hell yeah lol

Ancient Egypt? sign me up, gotta prove the conspiracy nuts wrong and show them aliens didn't build the pyramids lol

Most importantly though, dinosaur ages (Mesozoic Era), I gotta know what they actually looked like, and to hear a real trex roar? yes please

9. immortality?

this is a tough one because on one hand, eternal life, getting to see the future, plus all the cool inventions... on the other though, living through global horrors (war, politics, disease, etc) and having to outlive all your friends and family...

i honestly have no idea what I would actually say to an offer like that, so because I'm feeling reckless today we'll say yes 😂

10. what makes my day better?

depends on the day, but I'll list a few for fun: sitting down with a comfort movie and some popcorn, talking to my (adoptive) kiddos, anything to do with my girlfriend, and making other people happy

kind of a cheesy list but all true lol

Hopefully I answered your questions well enough, thanks for sending them :)

and thank you for checking in on me! I'm not doing too bad at the moment, and hopefully you're doing well yourself!

(even if I'm not in the mood to write I'm always down to talk to you guys so feel free to stop by whenever)

[huntective-kyeo]

❗Warning❗ TYPOS, SPELLING, AND GRAMMAR. And English is not my first language. Kinda angry hehehe

This is my first time to post it here and I hope you like it. Feel free to criticize my writing so I can improve.

So enjoy.

FIRST FANFIC

My Father is Dean Winchester

Dean POV

I sat down on the chair and open the lid of the beer. It's been hectic two weeks. Sam and I hunt a witch in Colorado and it took us a week to find the witch and killed it. That witch got Sam to bruise his ankle, and a concussion but thankfully nothing major injuries that needed stitches and so. Most of all the sonavabitch wore witch almost touch and probably hex my Baby which I did make her pay for it.

All in all, it took us a few days to get back at the bunker and now I'm sitting on the chair, probably wanted to eat some pies and get drunk.

My thoughts interrupt when the door opened and I looked up wonder who that person is. My instinct is to grab my trustful gun and aim it towards that intruder. However instead of getting alert, and hunting instinct it exactly quite opposite to what I feel right now.

Third POV.

A girl took a deep breath and with her shaky hand, she holds the handle and she pauses before she opened the door.

She didn't know what to do or what to say. She felt nervous to face them all. She wants to keep it secret however it keeps harder and harder to hide all the symptoms she felt during the last few months.

with heavy heart and soul, she opened the door and wish that bunker is well as empty as when she leaves it a few hours ago.

She didn't notice that the Impala, her first love park on her usual spot, she didn't notice a man sit on the chair seem like thinking something, she didn't notice her dad.

Dean POV

" y/n? " I blurted out. I didn't notice that my daughter y/n leave the bunker without telling us, or wasn't I?

Y/n my precious daughter, my little sunshine, and the only reason aside from my little brother who keeps me alive. 16 years ago Her mother and I met at the bar and happened to have one night stand. I was drunk to forget us condoms. I didn't realize it until, nine months later, Kylia found me and she shove the newly baby born into arms. I didn't hear her rants about not wanting kids because I was so fallen to my baby girl. I swear y/n is the most beautiful baby girl that I've ever seen. From that fateful night, I swore that I protect and love her no matter what.

With the help of my brother and my family, we did a good job raising a finest and yet mini-me y/n which kinda bit frustrated when she becomes a rebellious teenager and seeking for a new way to hunt.

I know that being a father and hunter ain't hood to raise a child in a world full of darkness but I did try my best to become a father that she deserved and not the father that I used to grow up

I again clear up my throat and by the time that I saw her, I know something is terrible up. Called it father instinct. My stomach began to feel something that I don't know if it's about the food or the worriedness about my daughter.

"Where have you been, I told you not to go outside not unless if you needed something but should-" I stumble and am shocked by a sudden hug coming from my daughter. My eyebrows meet and speculate more thoughts about what happened to her during a few weeks.

Then suddenly y/n cried up and my heart broke up thousand of pieces. Through I used to her cry of nonsense but this is different. I can feel it.

I began to think of a different reason why she cried like this. Is she on her period? Did a boy break her heart? If it is, then who? Oh god, my baby girl is heartbroken?! No-no-no.

" Hey, baby girl what's wrong? " I managed to ask a few words as I stroke her hair.

I didn't get her reply as she continues sobbing and sniffing on my chest. I continuously stroke her hair and rubbed a small circle on her back. With her tears I heard, I began to tear up which probably I got hurt when my baby girl gets hurt.

I saw Sam holding a can and some books and gave me confused look. I know he was confused about what is going on and the same as me. I only gave her shrug off before concentrate on keeping her calm down.

I sigh and sing a song that makes her calm down. It's a song that I always sing to her whenever she feels scared and upset. it her lullaby and till now I always sing to her when she felt like this. And now even though she's growing up ain't stopping this.

'Hey Jude, don't make it bad

Take a sad song and make it better

Remember to let her into your heart

Then you can start to make it better'

I sang softly and smile. I heard her sobs subside and her shoulder is no longer tensed. I kissed her head and quietly sing the rest of the song

By the song ends, y/n look up to me and hate to see her red-rimmed eyes and red nose face at me.

" Daddy... "

Y/n POV

After the song finish, I felt quite comfortable and my heart no longer pains me.

" daddy" I called up again. I hate seeing my dad worried glances and I wanted to back down but I know it's too late, now that I cried to his chest, and makes my father worried.

" what's wrong, princess " I nearly chuckle to hear the old nickname that I used to love but hate now. I should give my father annoying and death glares to him but I'm drained and tired to argue with my father.

Instead of the reply to his question, I took a piece of paper inside my leather jacket. With my shaky hand, I hesitate to give it to him. I saw my father unfold the paper and read it.

I know he reads it as I saw his face turn to a worried and horrifying face. I bit my lip as teardrops start to stream to his face and suddenly it aches my heart.

I didn't realize that my uncle Sam was there and he took the paper that my dad read it. My dad was frozen and saw Sam has the same reaction but he stumbled a bit and luckily sat on the chair or else he would hurt more.

The air was tense and several minutes seemed like a century to me as I was forced to see my dad and uncle of their horrifying reaction.

I was about to leave them and lock them up in my room but my dad grabs my wrist and put pressure on it, so I couldn't shove it off, I hesitate to look at his now red-rimmed eyes just like mine.

" Is this true? "

My heart broke as I nod

" when... When did it start? "

I flinched to hear a tone when my dad wanted a straight answer but I could see the difference of it. Instead of deadly and threatened, it's a broken and saddened tone that probably haunt me the rest of my life.

" honey, when did start... " I look up to him as a surprise to hear the familiar fatherly sweet tone that only me can know.

"a few months ago. When you just back from purgatory dad... " I mumble but I know that dad heard it because he mumbles coherent words that I know he's cursing, I wish it's not from me.

Then suddenly my dad sat down on the chair and then he hugged tightly couldn't breathe but slightly loose the tightness but still hugging me

" We can pull this up alright, we will. N/n we will fight this together okay, we'll find ways to rid this shit. We will be on your battle. " I then look up at my father and saw the tense and urging look " we will fight this out but you'll do your job ok, you'll kick this shit out, and keep fighting. Don't give up okay please, little n/n. " I heard him crack as didn't say anything considering, I was crying again and the inky response I can get is nodding.

Then I hug my father again and I feel another wrapped strong arms. I smile softly that uncle Sam joined the party. Now we are Complete, I feel like I'm ready to fight this shut out.

" Winchester is hard to kill, not even cancer. " I chuckle to hear uncle Sammy spoke.

"Yeah right, so you gonna do your part little princess, aright. Don't give up. " My father kiss my forehead. We parted away and wipes the tears we have. We laugh as we sniffle then finally our tears died down.

My father, Dean wipe the remaining tears and I look up to him confused. I saw him sad and regret my eyes and my heart sank.

" I love you N/Niepie, " then he kisses my forehead.

----AND CUT!!! ---

" Nice work J2 and Jodi damn there are no dried tears here " Robert yelled as all the staff and crew wipe their tears. " okay thirty minutes break, Jared, come to me I gotta asked you something" he added.

A group of assistants swarms the actors and did their task. Some wipe their sweats, do makeup, fixing their hair, and so on.

Jensen chuckles a little bit and wipes the remaining tears from his eyes.

" nice job dude, seem like the Days of our Lives gig paid off huh" A sixteen years old, young actress Jodi Smith tease him.

He rolled his eyes and ruffle her hair. " nice try but no you not riding my Baby" Jodi groan and about to reply when her assistant came and whisper to her ear "You're lucky, Mr. Ackles. Robert needs me now but I won't stop bothering you not until I sat on the driver seat and ride the impala".

When Jodi is out of sight, Jensen Ackles began to walk through his trailer. The thirty minutes of break is not enough of yearning for his daughter.

By the time he got inside. He locks it and sits on the couch. He rubbed his tired face as he grabs the old filthy Cinderella wallet. Today scene was emotional to him, not because of the scene itself but because he truly did miss his daughter y/n

In the finale of season 12, alongside Jack Kline played Alexander Calvert, and y/n Winchester played Jodi Smith we're both introduced and a new cast of Supernatural. Jensen was supposed to be glad that there are two new members of their family, but instead, it replaces guilt and dreadful feelings.

It's not the new cast members but the fact that Jodi Smith portrays is seem a great punch to his heart that he starts to realize he still has a daughter that should be taken care of.

No one knows not even Jared. Danneel and the kids, the crew nor the fans knew that the great Jensen Ackles has a secret daughter and only his close family knew about this truth.

" I'm sorry princess, How I wish I was there for you but you know I can't."

Jensen stroke a faded picture of an eight-year-old girl holding a doll whilst hugging the twenty-year-old Jensen Ackles.

" I'm sorry, I love you" he kisses the picture with so much love and tears began to stream down his cheeks

Hope you like it keep safe everyone. Reblog and like will yah.

[blackcrystalball]

Sam is kind of everything to me honestly.

As a black girl that often gets manic pixie dream girlified by the people around me, I'm goth audhd and generally strange in a way that's fascinating to others, everything about her is so relatable and just real to me.

Actively being sought out because you inspire shiny new feelings in people is draining. Especially when they don't really put the work in to do the same for you. They like to observe you as you live your life, they are obsessed with you and find you so fascinating. They want to hear what you have to say because it's so strange and interesting. You're an alien. A lizard in a terrarium for them to gawk at.

They love being around you, and you love being around them. But there's a difference. You're there to make connections, you want to get to know them, you navigate every social interaction with a smile and wave because you genuinely are that happy. You love meeting new people and making new friends. But you aren't their friend. They didn't come here for a friend. They came to see you, the creature.

They want to be in your presence because it's so nice and interesting and fun, but they aren't getting to know you. They just bathe in your light and disappear. They never shine back on you.

This rant is pretty obvious projection on my part and has diverted a little from the way we see Sam portrayed in relation to her social interactions. But I just feel so seen.

Being popular for the version of yourself that people have in their heads, rather than who you actually are is such a specific and weird feeling. It's dehumanizing, but in a way that doesn't really hurt your feelings. It more just leaves you wondering if you're a real person to others. If they take your humanity and who you really are seriously.

But it doesn't really hurt, you know. So why do something about it, at least the popularity can be fun sometimes.

Ok just finished Adventuring Party.

It's so interesting to me the way Danielle was talking about how she felt bad for Sam because nobody takes her seriously not even Danielle (her actress) and she wanted to honor or give space to what that must feel like.

I'm sure Danielle was exaggerating for the sake of her point (I think she's put a lot of thought and effort into playing Sam) but even though I completely understood that fear as Sam voiced it and it fit how Danielle was playing her, I take Sam so seriously.

Sam talked three (maybe four?) ancient demons into leaving her friends body after a lifetime of them tormenting him, she's so incredibly charming that it's a running bit that ancient magical creatures respond to her (very casual) greetings in turn, she's a person who understands other people so well and is at the centre of all of these social dynamics!

And then Brennan mentioned how lonely it must be to make everyone around you feel like they're special but have people take no notice of your interiority, your pains and fears and needs.

Not only that, because you make everyone feel special, everyone assumes that's a reflection of your feelings about them, that you're light shines out around you like a halo and so of course they feel warmed by it without even noticing that you have left a space for them to shine back at you.