Personally of the mind that the CG styles are the ultimate form of SDJ.
I don't want this!
Give me this!
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I know I've been on about this for a while now and I'm being a hater but you're telling me SydCarmy was "always meant to be platonic" even though there are two seasons of writing making use of tried-and-true explicitly romantic tropes, themes and writing signals, and SydLuca is going to be romantic because...he was nice to her on screen for a few minutes?
I don't even care if people ship SydLuca, or if they just prefer it, but you can't honestly tell me that you believe Carmy was always meant to be a friend but Luca is an obvious love interest.
Just because Syd and Carmy haven't kissed or confessed their love to each other doesn't mean that isn't very obviously the direction this show is going. The Bear has already shown you who is endgame. It has shown you every episode of the show so far.
Honestly I really don't think The Bear fanbase understands this show or cares about these characters or the story being told here, which is unfortunate because this show is shockingly well-written in comparison to most shows right now, and we should be so grateful for it but all we're doing is complaining that the writers led us on by not making a ship canon fast enough. It's just. Sad.
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Think it’s underrated how when five was in the apocalypse and all he had was Viktors book to cling on to remember the family. It wasn’t a happy book. In 60 years as memories faded and deteriorated, what could have became memories tinted by nostalgia into something happier was grounded by the only physical remnant of them left. A sad book that realistically talks about how broken the family was. A book where the wallflower of the family drills into the cracks of the public images.
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I think if Wolf 359 had been running in the past ~2 years, it would've absolutely done numbers here, between how this site cares a lot more about character arcs and media analysis now, and also Hera's autistic disabled transgender swag. HOWEVER, they wouldn't be able to make Wolf 359 today, not even for like "political" reasons, but because characters in media now are all too self aware and good at talking about their own emotions. We would never get shit like Minkowski drugging Eiffel with hallucinogens to get him to read Pryce & Carter, instead they'd just have a heart-to-heart where she admits she's only so adamant about protocol because of her own insecurities. Half the fun of the show is extrapolating characters' motivations and thought process from their absolutely batshit actions and words! It just wouldn't be the same 😔
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week 4 / small commitments challenge
I read a tumblr post talking about how our experiences in young adulthood are so varied that while we aren't alone in those experiences, we are actually so alone...Maybe that's why I sometimes find myself thinking of the future more than the present because surely by that stage, I won't be so alone in that sense anymore. I felt that way in high school about university and I feel that way now in undergrad about whatever lies ahead. But what if I just took time to enjoy what there is to enjoy in my current category of experience? Stopped thinking happiness and belonging of that type lies never now but at some future destination? Perhaps I will stop feeling so behind in life because I've stopped thinking there is only one right path to follow to live a life that is satisfying to me. Perhaps I will feel less alone.
🪴 tomato garden (50/10):
M: no timer today bc it's annoying to keep pausing and unpausing whenever smth happens irl that doesn't neatly fit the timer
T: better to get as much sh*t done as i can than to have the pressure of a timer (never enough time 😭) burning a hole in the back of my mind 😪
W: 🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅+(1/2 🍅) (felt better today, hence the "tomato planting")
Th: 🍅🍅🍅+(1/2 🍅)
F: 🍅🍅🍅🍅
I also studied on Saturday (😭) and tried and failed to on Sunday (couldn't bring myself to focus...felt so drained 😪😭) but saw no point in tracking my time. I get things done when I get them done regardless. Sometimes a timer is just discouraging.
😎 side quests:
🐸 yoga: 🧘🏻♀️🧘🏻♀️🧘🏻♀️🧘🏻♀️ (fell off the bandwagon with this, but oh well)
📝 journalling: 🖋️🖋️🖋️🖋️🖋️🖋️🖋️(this REALLY saves my gears from spinning too much late into the night when i'm anxious. also serves as my main and important form of catharsis during the struggle towards semester's end ❤️🩹 i can't wait to feel alive again)
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HI. MACKERELMORE. nhw trickster. killington. amity. the chaos zone. deadwood. new and funny and interesting ways to slaughter people. tide clone shit. bonesaw boiling the failed clones alive. muse. trickster using muse to do shit like u just saw in killington. the wards seeing the trickster using muse to execute people in ways Like That. holds up mic!!!!!!!!!!!!
GOD. THERES SO MUCH GOOD FUCKING FOOD FOR NHW IN THE CHAPTERS I READ EARLIER. fuck. god. shit. okay.
starting with the trickster bc i feel like when i get into tides stuff ill talk for 10 years. ohhhhh my god dude as soon as they walked into a town called fucking KILLINGTON ????? i was like. god thats a joke trickster would make huh!!!!! hed think thats so fucking funny. (and it is. but only to me who has the advantage of seeing this as a narrative and not a real event i am experiencing. fucking hilarious shit. killington??!?!?!?!? killington. ) i have a lot of thoughts about the shit he did to Amity before he escaped and like. yeah. fuckin yeah. i dont think he wouldve killed Everyone in the city (gotta have. puppets to play with and also like. people who hes not controlling to chase around and hunt for sport) (this is fucking terrifying and awful! this is so bad! like catastrophically so!) but i definitely think when the wards go to amity (because i want them to do that so bad at some point) i think it will be in sort of a similar state to this with like. bodies strung up like decorations. graffiti made from fuckign. ash and blood and paint all mixed together. really obviously placed traps. etc etc etc. jsut like. evidence that this place is like his fucking playground! horrifying!
anyway yeah also muse holy shit. muse has to singlehandedly raze at least one fuckign town. for sure. dude dude like that fucking video jack had where they had everyone gathered together before they started killing them? that but with trickster and muse? and its . more fucking scary because instead of 200+ slaughterhouse 9 clones its literally JUST trickster and muse. and whatever random handful of puppets trickster is controlling around the edge of the crowd for extra sets of hands.. aauogaouguguhhghhhgh. i need them to do horrific shit.
OKAY. CLONE TIME. CLONE TIM.E . OUGHGHHGHGH TIIIIDE. TIIIIIIIIDE. how many failed clones do you htink there were. how many failed clones to make tide and magma. do you think they know about the failed clones. they got fucking BOILED ALIVE. do u think tide and magma ever see any of the other clones before theyre ready and they have to look at their own fucking faces (face?) and think about that. i still have that post abt the lambert family in my drafts god i need 2 finish that but. in my mind tide and magma are the oldest (technically magma is the oldest but tide was like. a year or less after him so theyre closer in age) and then it was. seismic and whirlwind at the same time so theyre twins. and then shockwave. and then elle. so i think tide and magma have that Eldest Sibling bond where they have. Issues that are parallel to each other. and a LOT of that comes from being endbringer juniors and a lot of that comes from being clones. but where magma got closed off and aloof about it tide like. desperately clung to kindness bc he doesnt like when people are scared of him. anyway im getting distracted. FUCKING CLOOOOOONE SHIT. CLONE LORE. WORM CLONE LORE. THE WHOLE LIKE. either implanting false memories from other people or needing to raise them from scratch????? thats fucking insane. oh my god. what the fuck kind of memories do u think they got. obviously a lot from dr lambert but like. man. do u think the endbringer thing is like baked into their fucking memories. its in their dna. i didnt quite understand the bit about bonesaw trying to give them their powers but if altering memories can alter what sorts of powers they get...... do the endbringers have dna. do u think tide and magma got endbringer dna in them. that would be sick (both in the sick meaning cool way and in the im gonna make myself sick way). actually that brings up the point. are the endbringers even organic??????????? or are they constructs?????????? since they were confirmed created by someone/something....... man. MANY THOUHGST HEAD FULL. HAVING A LOT OF EMOTIONS ABOUT NHW TIDE. bonesaw boiled the failed clones alive. i dont . i dont think tide and magma were ever *kids* (which is like. ow.) but like. god im just imagining the part in trigun where vash and knives find whats left of tesla. holy shit dude. do you see my vision here
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how do yall get through the moments where you're hit by the reality that - this is what life is. this is the next however long of your life till you kick the bucket?
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So I gave myself the challenge of hiking 100 miles this month, since I don't have a job. And I completed it today! Don't know if I'll stop yet, but I'm definitely taking tomorrow off...
I visited a place I've wanted to go for years called Virgin Falls, roughly 2 hours outside Nashville. I managed to convince my kid brother to tag along, since he likes to sneak out of the house and go on walks around town, and I think he had a good time. He definitely had a look of wonder on his face that I haven't seen since he was a little-little. I went to school near the park, but everyone always warned me not to go because it's super dangerous. It wasn't, though. Maybe to someone without much experience, but I do this kind of thing all the time. Trail map said 8 miles. Ended up being 9.3 (which matters a lot when you're that far in). Pretty much anywhere there was water, there was a cave. All the falls exit into caves. It was beautiful! Most of my photos have my brother's face in them, so I don't have a lot to post, but it was just such a cool time. Highly recommend it to anyone in the area. It's a major task (took 5 hours and all my energy), but it's so worth getting to see the most unique waterfalls I've ever seen.
But yeah. Got my hundred miles in, saw some cool shit, and got to spend time with my troubled teen brother. Overall great day.
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