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#Gale apparently has WAY higher standards with his food than Devi does
keldae · 4 months
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Differing Standards
Even an expert cook like Gale could only do so much with the limited space he had to work with in camp – not for the first time, he bemoaned the lack of counter space that he enjoyed in his kitchen at home in Waterdeep. He muttered a curse under his breath as he dropped a dried sausage in the dirt by his feet. “Oh, for the love of Mystra…” he groused, eyeing the ruined sausage.
“Hmm?” Devi’s voice sounded as she meandered up to the cooking area, probably hopeful of coaxing Gale into letting her taste the stew he was making. Her eyes caught sight of the downed sausage, and her face lit up. “Five second rule!” she crowed as she swooped down and picked up the sausage with deft fingers, looking well pleased with her prize.
Gale blinked in confusion at the half-Elf. “Five second… what?”
“Do wizards not have the five second rule?” Devi asked, brushing off the sausage from the dirt it had accumulated. 
“I admit, I have never heard those words in that order before,” Gale slowly said. “Why do I suspect that I won't like whatever this ‘five second rule’ is?”
Devi grinned – not for the first time over the past two days since he had been pulled out of the portal, Gale thought she had a very pretty smile. But the mischief tinting her expression now worried him. “Basically, as long as dropped food has been on the ground for less than five seconds, it's probably still perfectly fine to eat…” She trailed off into giggles at Gale's appalled expression. “Have you never heard of that?”
“No, because I was raised in a civilised society!” Gale retorted. “Once food is on the ground, it is barely fit for more than animal fodder.”
“What's it like to have such high standards like that?” Devi mused as she examined the sausage, brushing a little bit more dirt off the dried meat. “Waste of perfectly good food.”
“That is not ‘perfectly good food’ when it has dirt and pine needles and gods-only-know what else on it!” Gale shook his head and tried to reach for the sausage. “I'm making ‘perfectly good food’ as we speak – just be patient. You don't need to eat food that was on the ground.”
“But I'm hungry now ,” Devi complained. “And it's just a bit of dirt – adds some extra texture, y’know?”
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