#GET BACK IN THE KITCHEN AND MAKE ME A SANDWICH HANS | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sluttywonwoo · 2 years ago

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instead of you [part thirty-two] || l.mh

pairing:��[best friend’s brother] lee minho x college!reader ft. han jisung

summary: you didn’t expect to spend your summer pretending to be your best friend’s girlfriend- then again, you didn’t expect to fall for your best friend’s brother, either.

warnings: swearing, angst, mentions of sex (mdni ; 18+)

word count: 2.2k

a/n: revamped my tom holland series from my main blog ( @wazzupmrstark ) to try and motivate myself to finish it!!

series masterlist | early access to the next chapter on ko-fi

The first time you met Jisung was at a party on campus. It was a month into your first semester of college and one of the frats had passed out fliers in the residence halls in the hopes of getting lots of the freshman girls to attend.

You had dragged your roommate with you, insisting that you needed to get out there and start meeting people since you were each other’s only friends thus far.

But the joke was on you because she ditched you not even five minutes after arriving, having recognized an ex-boyfriend from her hometown. You didn’t hold it against her, you had been the one to convince her to come in the first place and you understood the whole ex thing.

But you were a lot shyer back then, less confident. So you stumbled your way through the house until you reached the kitchen. No one had offered to make you a drink yet so you figured you might as well make one yourself. You’d need a little liquid courage if you were going to get the balls to talk to any of these people anyway.

That’s where you ran into Jisung. He was bent over the stove cooking what looked to be a grilled cheese sandwich. He turned his head when he heard you come in and nodded at you in acknowledgement.

“Want one?” he asked.

“What is it?”

“Grilled ham and cheese.”

You nodded. “Hit me.”

He finished simmering the one in the pan and slid it onto a paper plate before grabbing the ingredients for yours.

“How long have you lived here?” you asked conversationally.

“Oh, I don’t live here.”

“Are you a pledge then?”

“No.”

“You’re not… affiliated with this frat?”

“Nope.”

“Are your friends?”

“Nah.”

“So you’re just…”

“Stealing their food? Kind of.”

You shrugged. “I won’t tell.”

He cracked a smile. “Good, because I’d really regret making you a sandwich if you did.”

You hadn’t noticed until that point but he had an accent.

“English?” you asked.

“Yes, that’s what we’re speaking. Why, do you know another language?”

You rolled your eyes. “You know what I meant.”

“No, I’m from Korea, actually,” he explained after chuckling. “But my English tutor was British so I picked up a little bit of an accent.”

“What made you decide to come all the way over here?”

“A mix of things, really,” he sighed.

“You’re probably tired of that question, I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s okay. I just don’t have an interesting answer or anything so conversations usually fizzle out after that.”

“I get it. It’s like when everyone in your hometown asks you what you’re going to study and what job you’re getting your degree for.”

“Pretty much,” he agreed. “Your grilled cheese is ready.”

He plated the sandwich and handed it to you, turning the stove off and depositing the pan and spatula in the sink.

“Thank you!”

“You might want to let it cool down a bit, though.”

“Yes, chef.”

He gave you a look, making you freeze in place.

“What? Should I not call you that?”

“No, it’s just- I’m a culinary major. I’m always saying that to my professors but no one’s ever said that to me before. I know you didn’t mean it mean it but it sounded weird.”

“I was just referencing Hell’s Kitchen,” you admitted.

“Just so you know, not all chefs are like Gordon Ramsay.”

“Only the majority?”

He winked at you. “Bingo.”

“So if you don’t want me to call you ‘chef’, what should I call you?”

“I never said I didn’t want you to call me that,” he clarified. “But you can call me Jisung.”

“Jisung. Nice name.”

“Thanks. Do you have one?”

You grinned. “I do.”

He gave an exasperated little sigh. “And what is it?”

You told him, leaning forward and whispering it like it was a secret.

“You have a nice name too.”

“Thank you.”

“By the way, your sandwich should be cool enough to eat by now.”

You leaned back against the island and took a bite of your grilled cheese. Jisung gauged your reaction, raising his eyebrows expectantly.

“Good?”

“Great. Best grilled cheese sandwich I’ve ever had.”

“Don’t fuck with me,” he warned.

“I’m not! Listen, I can’t cook for shit so I’m very easy to impress.”

“I’ll take your word for it. It’s better for my ego if I ignore the last part.”

“I can make a mean Moscow Mule, though. My talents lie in mixology, not gastronomy.”

“Make me a drink, then?” he asked.

“Gladly.”

You set your paper plate on the counter and made your way over to the fridge.

“Let’s see what they have in here.”

“Oh, now you’re the one stealing food?”

“Guess that makes us partners in crime.”

You fell silent as you looked over the contents of the refrigerator, gathering a bottle of orange juice and half-empty jar of raspberry jam. You checked the expiration dates before continuing because you didn’t trust frat guys and then set them on the island with a handle of tequila that had been left out.

Jisung watched as you spooned the jam into an empty solo cup, visibly skeptical. You couldn’t blame him for not trusting you, you had just met him, after all. You poured the orange juice in next and mixed the two together, finally adding a shot and a half of tequila.

“Don’t want to get you too drunk,” you explained.

He scoffed. “You think that’ll do me in? I’m Korean, remember?”

“Fine, suit yourself.”

You poured what you approximated to be another shot of tequila into the cup. You filled another cup with ice from a nearby cooler and poured the contents of the first cup into it. Instead of shaking them and risking making a huge mess, you rolled them between the cups until you were satisfied that everything was properly mixed.

You presented Jisung with your creation, eyes shining. “Here you go! It’s a makeshift tequila sunrise.”

Jisung reached for it but you stopped him abruptly. “Wait! Hold on.”

You took a sip of the drink yourself, just to make sure it was actually palatable, before passing it off to him.

“Sorry, wanted to check.”

“Not confident in your abilities all of the sudden?“ he mused.

“I’m trying something new,” you grumbled defensively, “artists make mistakes. I’m not above admitting that and therefore want to quality check my products to make sure it’s good enough for my consumers.”

“Didn’t realize you were taking this so seriously.”

“I take everything seriously.”

He eyed you suspiciously. “Something tells me that’s not true.”

That night, and all the others you spent with Jisung flashed before your eyes like some sort of sick slideshow as you stood there with him in the hallway. The fractures in the glass were beyond repair now, spindling inward threatening to shatter.

You supposed it was what you deserved, watching your relationship with your best friend crumble right in front of you.

“Why do you ask?” you said quietly, still testing the waters.

“You think I haven’t noticed you sneaking off every night?” Jisung demanded.

“Uh-”

“At first, I thought you just needed some space. And I understood because you’ve been stuck with us for over a month now, but then it happened every night and you’d be gone for so long,” he sighed. “So finally, I followed you-”

“You what?”

“I know, I’m such a bad friend for invading your privacy.” His voice was dripping with sarcasm and you could already feel the tears welling up.

You tried to hold them back because you didn’t deserve to cry. You’d put yourself in this situation, and you knew it was wrong, but you still did it anyway. You clutched your towel closer to your body, trying to shrink into yourself.

“I heard what I needed to,” he continued. “So how long have you been fucking my brother?”

“Jisung, I-”

“I asked you a question.”

“Long enough,” you muttered. “He found out we weren’t actually dating. I didn’t tell him-”

“That makes it better?”

“No, I just thought you should know.”

“What does it matter anyway,” he spat. “We had an agreement. You had one task and you couldn’t even do it. I should have never invited you on this goddamn trip.”

You couldn’t help but agree. “I’m sorry.”

Jisung laughed humorlessly and shook his head. “I don’t believe you. If you actually felt any guilt over this you never would have done it. Or you would’ve at least stopped before it got to this point.”

“No, I am sorry,” you tried. “It’s just…”

“Just what?” he asked, eyes widening suddenly. “You’re not pregnant, are you?”

For a fraction of a second, you were thrown back in time. The best friend that didn’t hate you was suddenly standing in front of you, eyes full of concern. It passed just as quickly as it had come when you denied it.

“No, it’s just… I f- I’m in love with him.” You couldn’t even look Jisung in the eye when you said it, too afraid of his reaction.

It was dead silent all throughout the house after your confession. You stared at the floor where a puddle had appeared at your feet from your dripping hair.

He chuckled again in disbelief, breaking the silence.

“You’re not in love with him,” he said matter-of-factly. “You don’t even know what love feels like. You’ve only known him for a fucking month, how could you possibly love him?” You were crying now, furiously wiping away the tears that fell onto your cheeks. “You’re just lonely, y/n, and desperate, and grasping at straws for anything that feels like ‘love’.”

“That’s not true,” you insisted. You weren’t sure why you were trying to defend yourself. He was probably right.

“It is true! I’ve known you for how many years now? You’ve never had a real relationship with anybody. How could you possibly know what love feels like?”

You shook your head adamantly, convincing yourself he didn’t mean what he was saying. “You’re lashing out.”

“Is it lashing out if it’s true?” he quipped.

You swallowed hard, choking a bit.

“I can’t fucking believe this. My best friend and my brother. I went away to school to be on my own and have my own life, and somehow Minho manages to take that too.” He was mostly talking to himself now. “What if someone else had caught you two? How fucked up would that have looked? I put no flirting with my brothers on the list of rules for a reason, obviously. Although I guess it didn’t matter in the end anyway, did it? You didn’t take them or this seriously.”

“Ji, that’s not true and you know that. I’m the one who wrote out those flashcards. I memorized all that stuff about your family. I flew halfway around the world for you— I did take it seriously.”

“Until Minho offered his dick to you on a silver platter?”

“Oh my god!”

“Am I wrong?”

You sighed. “It’s a lot more complicated than that.”

“Explain it to me then. When did this all start anyway?”

“Minho kissed me for the first time in, um, Italy.”

“Oh my god, I’m the biggest fucking idiot in the world,” he groaned.

“But it wasn’t like that then… he still thought we were together then.”

Jisung threw his hands up. “That makes it worse!”

“I know but he was drunk.”

“That’s not an excuse. You of all people should know that.”

You let the dig slide since he was in an emotional state and you were in no position to argue anyway.

“I know.”

“So you guys have been sneaking around behind my back for like a fucking month now?”

“We didn’t sleep together until Shanghai, when he found out we weren’t together. But I feel like I should tell you I kissed him in Japan. Just so that you know everything.”

“Oh, thank you so much,” Jisung deadpanned. “Thank you for being so honest.” He spat the last word at you, which again, was deserved, but hurt nonetheless. You sniffled. “I can’t believe you’re the one crying right now.”

You couldn’t believe that Jisung wasn’t crying but then again he wasn’t the type to cry when he was angry. He only cried when he was sad, and that probably hadn’t hit him yet.

You were starting to get cold wearing nothing but a towel but tried not to let it show. Of course, Jisung noticed instantly. He sighed as you shivered and pursed his lips. Even when he was furious with you, even when your relationship was irreparably damaged, he cared about you. It wasn’t something he could just turn off, though maybe with time, he’d learn to.

“Anyway, go to bed. I’m going to sleep on the couch.”

“O-okay,” you mumbled.

Jisung brushed past you abruptly, muttering to himself loud enough for you to hear.

“God, I wish I’d never fucking met you that night.”

You bit down on your lip as hard as possible to choke down a sob. All you could do was stand there motionlessly and stare at the floor. You waited for him to walk away into the living room but the footsteps stopped suddenly.

“Oh, and a word of advice-”

“Hm?” You turned around to face him, trying your best to pull yourself together.

“You should try getting over your feelings for Minho as fast as possible. He doesn’t love you back. He’s just using you, babe. I know he’s pretty smooth but that’s why he’s so good at his job. Easier said than done, I know, but you’re a smart girl. You’ll figure it out.”

hard one to write (and i imagine to read) but lmk what you think i always appreciate feedback!!

iou tags: @gimmeurtmi @phobia0325 @fwess @hipsofafangirl @galaxleeknow @urmomma0324 @bangmechanpls @102598s @farfromsugafanfic @ritzy-roo @dimpledsatan @bvslines @wonderfulshinee @imwithurmother @smollquokka @rosexjimin @skizzel @endzii23 @lady-lena @kwanisms @ch4nniebang @lilramennoodle @babyphotos0325 @dearalice @sojohns @mistlitmoonlight @yoontaethings @babebatter @mal-lunar-28 @shy-kisu @zerefdragn33l @downbadreading @saquso @bunnispaces @reianagarcia @hyunehans @imtooyoungforthisshitbaby @i8rsie @honeslykindahorny @214racha @hgema @chillllli @vixensss @smhlino @feiyaa @borahae-reads @bigbearenergy @hoodiesandicedcofee @darkacademic2512 @y00nzin0 @i8yul @shinypieceofgarbage @woozarts @just-a-little-delulu @djeniryuu @hbzzzbork000 @mimzibee @sofiaslayed @kangyounghyunhands @lexxxxs-things @baejinswrld @gaysontheprince @emogril @ngengngeng @tenshimara @stopeatread @seungminniesgf @lydatataylorsversion @cheolbs @bxnnyhwa @zheav @pinkskiesdream @soohyukazz @spearb-gf @lonely00sbrat @lino1ino @simple1605 @ninashellhole @yoorimin @catiuskaa @gemini-demon @kronikk

add yourself to the taglist here!

#instead of you stray kids #instead of you skz #iou stray kids #iou skz #stray kids x reader #skz x reader #stray kids x female reader #skz x female reader #lee know x reader #lee know x female reader #lee know x bi!reader #stray kids series #lee know series #lino x reader #lee minho x reader #minho x reader

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otterandterrierwrites · 3 months ago

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wordless ways to say "i love you": 27. leaving a plate of food in the microwave for when they have a late shift.

for @hanleiahothwars

It was past 2200 when Leia finally got off her shift and headed for the Falcon, hoping she was still on time to catch Han, Chewie and Luke after dinner—and in time for some leftovers, so she wouldn’t have to circle back to the mess hall on her way to bed. She’d told them she might be a little late, but they’d finally received an update on a group of missing operatives, and it’d been over an hour before a rescue mission could be put together for the following day and Leia was finally relieved of duty.

The Falcon’s ramp was down, but inside everything was dim and quiet. Leia still wandered into the main hold, only to have her suspicions confirmed: she was a lot late to dinner. Luke had clearly left, but somebody on the freighter had to be up and about if they hadn’t yet closed the ramp. She was halfway down the corridor to the cockpit when she felt movement behind her—for a fleeting second, she was convinced she could tell it was Han, and her heart skipped a beat.

When she turned around, she found Chewie waving at her. She wasn’t disappointed to see Chewie. She liked Chewie. She was only mildly let down to find out her guess hadn’t been accurate.

‘Hey Chewie,’ she said, tamping down those ridiculous thoughts as she walked back into the main hold. ‘Sorry I couldn’t make dinner. Looks like I missed everyone.’

‘[We were going to wait for you, but Han was summoned to fix a problem with one of the X-Wings going out tomorrow, and Luke has an early shift],’ Chewie explained. ‘[Han asked me to wait a little longer for you.]’

‘I see… Well, I’m glad to have caught you at least,’ Leia said, giving him a smile and touching his arm briefly. ‘But I don’t want to keep you up—it was really kind of you to wait, but texting me would have been fine—it’s on me for being so late.’

Mess hall leftovers it was, then.

‘I’ll see you guys soon, all right?’ she said, starting to walk past him. It had been a long night, and loath as she was to admit it, she’d been looking forward to a couple of hours among friends, sharing in a meal that had been prepared with more than nutritional value in mind.

‘[Princess, wait!]’ Chewie roared behind her. ‘[That’s not all I had to say to you. Have you eaten yet?]’

‘No, but don’t worry about it—I’ll grab something from the kitchens.’

Sometimes there were sandwiches made with the leftovers available for people on the night shifts, although, since they went by an honour code, their availability tended to vary. If she didn’t have such luck, she could always grab a ration pack. Nobody was greedy about those.

Chewie shook his head. ‘[You don’t have to. Han saved you a plate from dinner and left it in the microwave. That’s why I stayed up.]’

‘Oh, really?’ She immediately brightened at the prospect of getting to enjoy Han’s cooking after all; a vast step up from even the least disgusting ration pack and the mess hall sandwiches. Chewie was already crossing over to the corner of the main hold that served as an unofficial galley, and turning on the microwave (on top of which rested the thermapad somewhat precariously—that was the way things were at the Falcon).

‘That’s very thoughtful,’ Leia said. ‘Thank you, Chewie.’

‘[It’s really Han you should thank],’ the Wookiee mentioned, bringing the hot plate to the dejarik table after a couple of minutes. ‘[He made sure we did not eat all of it. Of course Luke and I wanted you to have the leftovers… it’s just that it was hard to remember because it was nerf stew night.]’

‘Of course,’ Leia said, sitting down at the table and breathing in the flavourful steam of the dish, stomach growling in anticipation. She grabbed the fork Chewie had set down for her, but paused for a moment, as her throat grew tight. Yes; she was glad she got to enjoy Han’s food after all. He didn’t always do it in the most obvious ways, and he’d be quick to deny it if told so, but inviting her and Luke for dinner was one way in which he went against script and showed that he cared. And right now, sitting with a plate of steaming homemade food he’d made sure to save for her even though he didn't have to, that was exactly what she felt: cared for.

#hanleia #han x leia #han solo #leia organa #chewbacca #2025 #ficlet #rated G #period: preesb #wordless ways to say i love you #enjoy!#not beta read so please ignore any mistakes

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ts19009 · 4 months ago

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Hong's Anatomy: Part 6

Pediatrician surgeon! Joshua x pediatric surgeon! Female Reader

Synopsis: Coming to Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital wasn’t on your bucket list, that’s for sure, but when you meet the head of your department, Joshua Hong, it's one of the only things that constantly brightens your day.

Warnings: swearing, made up medical terms and procedures, i have no idea if any of this is medically accurate it’s just for story, flirting, no smut, ANGST BEWARE YALL

Words: 3.4k

NOT EDITED, SO I MAY GO BACK AND EDIT LATER (teehee)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Joshua

I know we need to talk about what happened, but can I come over? It’s been a rough day? Seen: 9:39pm

Y/N <3

Yeah sure, bring some food!Seen 9:40 pm.

By the time Joshua had come to your apartment with food, it was almost 10:30, and he was exhausted. As soon as you opened the door, Joshua wrapped his armos around you and gave you a bone crushing hug.

“That bad of a day?” You asked, wrapping your arms around him as well.

“Yeah, it was bad. I lost all my patients today,” Joshua sighed moving inside to your kitchen and placing the food down.

“I’m sorry,” you pouted and wrapped your arms around his waist and laying your head on his back, “do you want to tell me about it?” Joshua nodded and threw his head back.

“The worst one was my first surgery of the day, it was Simone, a complication occurred and we couldn’t save her, and when I went to tell her mom, she said she was going to sue me and how she wanted me out of the hospital. She looked so broken and sad, and it was awful. The surgery was supposed to be the safest option and it killed her.”

“That’s not your fault Joshua,” you tried to reassure him.

“I know, but you of all people know that it doesn’t stop the guilt.” You nodded and pressed a kiss to the back of his neck. “I know that we need to talk about our fight, but right now I really just want to eat this chicken and cuddle.”

You chuckled and nodded, “I can do that.”

----------

“So you just completely ignored the huge argument you had?” Jeonghan scoffed before taking a bite of his sandwich. Joshua just shrugged, he knew he didn’t have to explain anything to Jeonghan, but he could feel the judgement.

“I told her that we would talk about it, but if we could just wait.” Jeonghan nodded, not completely convinced, but he didn’t say anything else, not wanting to get in more hot water with his best friend.

“Is she even here today? I haven’t seen her at all?”

“Yeah, shes coming in after me, so I doubt you’ll see her, you were in here earlier than me,” said Joshua, “there’s just been so much going between work and everything else that I’m having a hard time separating them. How did you and Sophie managed to do it?”

Jeonghan shrugged but smirked, “we tried to not work with each other as much as possible so that feelings wouldn’t get brought and we could go home and act as if we weren’t in the same building. In the end it didn’t matter because she ended up cheating on me with an intern, but thats what kept it going for almost five years.”

Joshua sighed, he didn’t know how he could ignore Y/N at work, they’re jobs needed them to work together, their lives were to intertwined.

“I don’t know how to do that Han,” Joshua admitted.

“You’re gonna have to make a sacrifice. Either give up work or give up Y/N if you want to be balanced. I know it sounds harsh, but you can’t have both.” Jeonghand patted Joshua on the shoulder before standing up to leave.

This was going to be an awful shift.

-----------------

Coming home after your last shift was bittersweet. You really loved the sweet time you had with Joshua last night, but you knew that you needed to talk to him again. You decided that after a shower and supper you would go over and try and talk about your argument.

“Hey! How was your shift?” Joshua asked, opening the door, surprised to see you. “Come in!”

“It was long, a lot of paper work only got in one surgery,” you sighed, taking off you coat, “that’s now why I came over though.” Joshua sighed and nodded taking a seat on his couch.

“You wanna talk about the fight?” He asked.

“Yes, I wanna talk about the fight” you said, “we’re pushed it aside to much.” Joshua nodded, this is what he had been thinking about all day, he was ready.

“Okay,” he said as you sat across from him.

“First off, Sophie. I don’t understand why you haven’t brought her up at all, but I do understand that it was unreasonable of me to blow up like that. I think I was just insecure the way that Jeonghan described her and the way you both were in love with her.” Joshua nodded.

“Thanks,” Joshua said reaching out to hold your hand. “I’m sorry I made you feel insecure and for acting so defensive.”

You smiled and squeezed his hand, “but there is something I would like to talk about.”

You furrowed your eyebrows and nodded. “I talked to Jeonghan earlier about why things seemd so hard for us. He said that it was because we work together. We’re with each other both at home and at work and we’re confusing those feelings and worlds and it’s not healthy,” he said, tears coming to his eyes.

“What are you saying?” You ask, tears coming to your eyes.

“I’m saying that because our jobs require us to work together so closely, that…” Joshua sobbed, “that we need to break up for the good of our patients and ourselves.”

You finally let a full sob out and dropped Joshua’s hand to wipe the tears falling down your cheeks. “You’re not gonna try and let us work on separating our feelings?”

“This is us working on separating our feelings Y/N,” Joshua tried pleading.

“No, this is you making a decision for us, without my input. Did you ever think of the emotions and feelings we’re gonna have now Joshua?” You sob, standing up and walking to the coat rack.

“I’m sorry,” he cried, watching you opening his door.

“Yeah, so am I,” you say before leaving and slamming the door in his face.

----------

“Babe you look like shit. Did you get any sleep?” Rose asked, handing you your next patients charts as you shook your head.

“No, but I’m fine. I had two energy drinks,” you shrugged, “Jamie Finnagin four years old in for a heart replacement. Has been on the list for almost three months, we finally have a match for him.”

Rose nodded and gently woke Jamie up from his sleep, his parents had agreed to go get some lunch while you talked to Jamie about his surgery.

“Hi Jamie. I’m Doctor Y/N, are you ready to get a new heart today?” You asked, as his eyes lit up and nodded. “We have to do a few things before like poke you a little but you’ve always been a champ during those.”

Jamie nodded and held out his hand, ready for the new IV to go in. You smiled got the IV ready, “my parents have been crying all day.” Jamie said, as you put his new IV in. His sudden confession startled you, not enough to flinch, but enough to tilt your head.

“Well I’m sure that their excited for you to get better,” you said, placing a cotton swab over the needle to stop the little bleeding.

“I don’t like it when they cry though,” Jamie whispered, making your heart break a little bit. You pouted a little bit and held your hand out for him to hold.

Jamie looked up at you and held your hand, “some times you can cry because you’re happy. Crying doen’t always mean that you’re sad,” you try to explain, “like when I got my first dog Apple, I cried because I was so happy.”

Jamie nodded, seeming to understand. “When was the last time you cried doctor Y/N?”

Your heart stopped beating for a minute and you held your breath trying to think of the last time you cried which was last night. “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe a week ago.”

“Why?”

You closed yoru eyes, trying to think of a lie to tell a child “I watched a sad movie with my friend. Do you know the movie UP? I cried in the beginning.” Jamie smiled and nodded, agreeing with you that the beginning of UP was really sad. Before you could say anything else, Jamie’s parent’s came back from the cafeteria with lunch for Jamie.

“Enjoy your lunch and I shall see you later for your new heart!” You smiled and gave Jamie’s mother a little pat on the shoulder before leaving for a break room. You emotions where everywhere and you were trying to not cry in the hall.

“Y/N?” Jeonghan asked, as you sped walked passed him to the on-call room right next to OR room 2, “Y/N, what’s wrong? Are you hurt?” He asked, as you closed the door and let out your first sob.

You were embarassed that Jeonghan of all people is the one that you ran into out of the whole hospital. You tried to get something out that you were okay, but you kept choking on your sobs. Poor Jeonghan was still there asking you questions, so the only thing you could think of was opening the door.

When you opened the door you saw Jeonghan with his glasses on, running a hand through his hair, and his coffee long discarded on the floor. You couldn’t help but cry more, throwing yourself at him to cry into his shoulder.

He was surprised when you opened the door, let alone basically hug him. He instinctively wrapped his arms around you and slightly moved you both into the oncall room, but just let “you cry for a while. Eventually you pulled yourself away and wiped your tears, cheeks flushed, embarrassed.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to throw myself on you like that and surprise you,” you awkwardly chuckle as Jeonghan hands you a tissue.

“No no it’s okay. I’m glad I could be here,” he smiled and put a hand on your shoulder. “Is there anything you’d like to talk about? Get off your shoulders?”

You wiped your tears again, and tried to catch your breath before nodding. “Joshua and I broke up last night,” you whispered, “he said that he needed to separate his work and personal life better.”

Jeonghan froze, that’s what he had suggested to Joshua, he didn’t know that Joshua would break up with you, he thought he would try and put some new boundaries, but this felt pretty extreme. “Oh, I’m sorry Y/N.”

You sighed and shrugged, “he said that we worked to closely together to not see each other at work, so he broke up with me. He didn’t even try to work it out.”

You started to cry again, turning around to not cry, again, infront of Jeonghan. Jeonghan’s guilt was eating away at him, he didn’t know what to say.

“Joshua is an idiot who doesn’t know how to deal with emotions other than happiness. He starts to feel scared or sad and then he just shuts down and shuts out,” Jeonghan said, “he gets into his own head to much and then theres no getting him out.”

You nodded, the few fights you have had before with Joshua were enough to see that he gets a little stuck in a straight line when he gets feeling. “It has nothing to do with you Y/N, it’s just him trying to figure out how to handle his own mess without hurting anyone.”

“But that’s the whole point of a relationship, is to let your partner help and see you through your struggles.”

“Yes, but all of Joshua’s past partners have NOT done that at all. Infact, everytime something hard in Joshua’s life came up his past girlfriends left him. He’s trying to protect himself.”

You sighed, even though the insight on Joshua ws frustrating to deal with on the outside, it gave you some time and knowledge to calm down a little bit more. You wiped your nose this time and took a seat on the couch.

“I don’t know what to do then,” you confessed.

Jeonghan exhled softly, sat next to you, and placed a hand on your back, “just let him go through it and be there for him in the end. Even if he doesn’t want you right away, he still needs you.”

----------

Joshua’s next shift felt strange, he had slept through all of his day off and when waking up this morning, it was like his body was on autopilot, and allt he sudden he was in the hospital. It was kind of scary that he arrived safely.

“Shua?” Jeonghan asked, snapping Joshua out of his daze.

“Oh yeah, sorry. What’s up?” Joshua asked, looking ove to Jeoghan and taking the tablet for his hands.

“I was asking you if you were focused on the case….” Jeonghan chuckled, taking the tablet back from his friend. “Why don’t you take the morning to warm up yeah?”

Joshua shook his head in confusion, “what? No, I’m totally fine!”

“Shua,” Jeonghan said, in a matter of a fact tone, “I know what happened to you and Y/N.”

Joshua’s face flushed and his eyebrows furrowed, “what how?”

“She was crying yesterday. I happened to find her and pull her out of surgery,” Jeonhan said, before hitting Joshua across the head.

“Oww!”

“What the hell man! I thought you were gonna try and set some new boundaries, or yeah know, maybe try and change your job a bit more to now put your really healthy relationship at stake, but no. You choose to be an idiot and dump your girlfriend who was literally perfect for you,” Jeonghan scolded. Joshua sighed and threw his head back before cutting him off.

“You don’t know what happened Han. You don’t know us!” Jeonghan stopped dead in his tracks.

“You know that your being a dick right? Not only to your ex but to everyone around you trying to help you. I know that ‘I don’t know you guys’ but everyone knows you both love each other.”

Joshua sighed, and just shook his head, not wanting to hear anything about his recent breakup. “Can we just get to the patient and the surgery?”

Jeonghan rolled his eyes, but nodded. He’d have to talk to his best friend another day.

“This is Y/N’s case? Why do we have it?” Joshua asked.

“She was only in for a bit yesterday. I told her to take the rest of the week off. She did a few beginning steps to the procedure. Jamie is all prepped and ready to go when you are,” Jeonghan sighed, he wasn’t sure if letting Joshua into a surgery was a good idea, but Jihoon would also be in the OR making sure that things would be undercontrol.

Joshua wasn’t exactly the happiest to hear that he was picking up your work from yesterday, but at the same time he knew that the breakup had affected you the most during impact. He still felt frozen and numb.

“You gave me my ex-girlfreinds cases Han?” Joshua scoffed.

“You’re the only other ped’s attending. We only have second year residents now,” Jeonghan sighed, “I didn’t want to put more work on your plate.”

“Whatever, it’s fine,” Joshua shrugged, “let’s just get this over with.” Jeonghan watched Joshua walk to the elevator to get to OR room 3. He sighed, wondering if he’d regret giving your cases to the clearly distracted Joshua.

“Doctor Li,” Joshua said, walking into the OR room, all scrubbed up. Jihoon Li was the one doctor in the hospital that he wasn’t as close to that the rest. Doctor Li was a work-a-aholic, always at the hospital never hanging out with everyone after and just opted to go home and sleep.

“Doctor Hong,” Jihoon nodded, “you ready?”

“As I’ll ever be.” Jihoon nodded and let Joshua open Jamie. The heart replacement was easy, Joshua had done it plenty of time before. “Is the UNOS heart on it’s way?”

“Yes, Kennedy is on her way with it right now. About three minutes,” Jake informed as Joshua nodded. By the time Kennedy had returned they got to work instantly. They only had a few minutes to remove Jamies heart, put in the new one and make sure it worked before the heart died. Everything was time sensitive and stressful.

“Three, two, one, now!” Jihoon said, removing Jamie’s heart whilst Joshua took the new heart and started getting to work on sewing the donor heart in and making sure that the major blood vessels are attached properly.

“Great job Doctor Hong!” Lia cheered, as the monitor started beeping signalling that Jamie’s heart transplant was a success. Everyone around them cheered and smiled as they started stitching Jamie back up.

----------

You had always said that you hated day off, you would much rather be at the hospital, until you met Joshua. You would spend your days off at his place. Cooking meals - for him, cleaning - his place, looking at pictures- of him, everything was for him. Now that you had broken up it was back to hating days off again, especially since it gave you time to reflect on everything that happened between you two. When you got sent home the day after your breakup you cried the whole rest of the day, the next day you lasted until noon before crying but it’s all you could think about. By the third day you were going crazy and had decided to try and get out of the house.

You’re parent’s had given you a gift card to a local Korean Barbaque restaurant for christmas, so you decided you’d take yourself out for dinner, but when you got there it was a surprise to see a familiar face.

“Y/N!” Jeonghan said, waving to you and gesturing you to join him at his table, “I just got here, I haven’t ordered yet. Join me!”

You weren’t sure if you were up to talking to Jeonghan after crying in front of him last time you had sawn him, but you also realized that his company would be nice, so you agreed.

“What are you doing here all alone?” You asked, taking off your jacket nd hanging up up on the coat hanger next to the booth.

“I come here every Friday if I don’t work,” he chuckled, handign you the menu. “It’s my little guilty pleasure.”

“This is my first time here,” you admitted looking around at the beautiful decor. You made some causal conversation until you ordered, after that a silence fell between you.

“Have you seen Joshua?” You asked, wanting to know if Joshua was as affected as you were.

Jeonghan tisked, sucking in air and nodding, “yeah, I saw him before he did Jamie’s heart transplant. It went well by the way.” You smiled, you were glad that the transplant went well. Jamie was a sweetheart. “He’s been working at the hospital almost 3 shfits in a row, I think that’s how he’s coping. Keeping himself busy, yeah know?”

You nodded, pausing to fiddle with your fingers, hesitant to ask the next question. “Has he talked about… us at all? The breakup?”

“Not really. I told him what a dick he was and he just kind of brushed me off. I haven’t seen him since,” Jeonghan explained, as your heart sunk a little bit. You felt like he was digging himself into a little hole that no one could get to. “He’s taking care of himself, but it’s hard to get through to him.”

“Thanks for letting me know,” you said, as the waiter came to get your order.

The rest of the dinner went well, Joshua wasn’t brought up again, and you managed to actually have some fun with Jeonghan playinga few drinking games as well as eating way to much. At the end of dinner, when the bill was payed for, you looked at your phone and sighed.

“I should go, it’s almost ten and you work tomorrow.” Jeonghan shrugged, but nodded standing up and holding your coat for youtube put on.

“I’ve pulled all nighters drunk before Y/N,” he chuckled, “don’t tell Seungcheol though.” You laughed and nodded, “it was good seeing you.”

Jeonghan nodded and gave you a hug, “don’t hesitate to reach out if you want a distraction,” he said, as you smiled and nodded. The thought was tempting, but you weren’t sure if you’d take him up on it, he was Joshua’s best friend, before he ever knew you. You didn’t want Jeonghan to have to choose like you did.

taglist: @asasilentreader , @myjaeyunn, @gaslysainz @itsnotjop @vixensss

A/N: Hey everyone! This is chapter is brought to you by the christmas break, I cranked this out basically all in one day and have spent the last week just slowly adding the last maybe hundred words XD. Anyway, I hope you like it! there defiently is more to come. I'm having so much fun making this story and I can't wait to finish it. <3

#joshua hong #seventeen #svt #seventeen fic #joshua x y/n #hong jisoo #joshua hong smut #joshua x reader #hong's anatomy #joshua hong fluff #yoon jeonghan #yoon jeonghan smut #jeonghan x y/n #love triangle

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brimarie0512 · 10 months ago

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Stray kids fanfic ot8 series part fifteen

Slow burn

WC: 2.0k (2,023)

There are pov switches, female reader, use of y/n, nicknames

Warnings: Mentions of food

Summery: after your morning with Felix and Chan the rest of the day is calm minus some overthinking before dinner.

I’m sorry this one is so short I’m trying to get back into the groove of things and I’m so sorry for the long wait there has been a lot going on ❤️

Chapter 15 “Calm Before The Storm”

Y/n’s pov

It was 11:27 when I started to blink my eyes open. I looked over and saw that Chan was still asleep so I rolled over facing Felix who was on his phone.

“How did you sleep Sunshine?” Felix asked me.

“Pretty good actually, I definitely needed that.”

“Yeah me too, I am not looking forward to the early mornings we will be having.” Felix said, rubbing his eyes.

“Yeah, I can't even imagine.”

Behind me I could hear and feel Chan rustling and starting to wake up. I felt his arm sneak around my waist in the process.

“Good morning Channie.” I said with a sweet tone.

“Good morning.” He gruffed back.

We all stayed in bed like this for a little bit longer with scattered conversations until we decided to actually get up. We eventually left the bedroom all together and walked towards the kitchen deciding we all needed to eat something. All the other boys were in the living room and looked over at us as we approached them.

“You two go sit, I will make something for us real quick.” Chan said.

Felix and I nodded our heads and went towards the living room joining everyone else. Felix and I joined the couch where Lee Know and Han were sitting. Lee Know was pressed against the armrest with Han snuggled up next to him. I sat next to Han, having him on my right and Felix sat next to me on the left.

“Well, it seems like you three had some fun.” Seungmin chucked from one couch.

Felix and I shared a look with each other and started blushing.

“Seungmin, don't be a jerk.” Lee Know said, giving him a pointed look. “We saw Chan’s bedding in the wash and considering you guys are just now getting out of bed kinda gave it away.” He then said in a reassuring way that showed there was no judgment.

“Oh.. Well, yeah, that makes sense.” Felix said, still looking slightly embarrassed.

Everyone else moved on and continued their earlier conversations but I was stuck in my own thoughts. Were they like this before I was in the picture? Did they already make jokes about sleeping with each other or is it because I am new and the only girl involved? I was suddenly pulled out of thought by Han drawing random lines on my thighI look up to see him looking at me with worry in his eyes. He then mouths the words “Are you okay?” I nod my head telling him I am good but he keeps looking at me worriedly. Luckily Chan comes in and hands Felix and I each a plate with some sandwiches and chips on them. Chan goes back to the kitchen to get his food and sits himself on the floor in front of me leaning back to slightly rest his back against my legs. The three of us dig in, eating while everyone else continues their conversations. When the three of us have finished our food I volunteer to go wash the plates. As I am in the kitchen washing the dishes I feel someone approaching. I look to my left and see Han coming into the kitchen.

“Hey, are you okay? I noticed you staring off after what Seungmin said.” He asked, concerned.

“You know you're really good at reading me, I don't know how that makes me feel.” I say jokingly but it really does freak me out sometimes.

“I struggle with anxiety. I know it when I see it. If you ever want to talk about what's on your mind, I'm here.” He says.

“Thank you.” I say sincerely. “Sometimes I just wonder if you guys talked like this before I got here? Like I know you guys have all been together but did you make these comments before?” I say avoiding his eyes.

“Oh Honey. Listen if that makes you uncomfortable I can talk to the rest of the guys, but to answer your question, yes we have always made jokes about it. Sometimes I think they make those jokes when they are jealous but other times it's just good fun to kinda say woo look at you guys go, I don't know if that makes any sense but I can tell them to stop when it comes to you.” He says looking at me with so much hurt in his eyes.

“No no no, it is okay I just wanted to make sure it was not just a me thing ya know? I guess I just get insecure because I am new to all of this.” I say

He slowly nods his head while still looking at me as if I am a glass about to break. I go back to doing the dishes and he stays next to me the whole time until i'm done. Once I dry my hands he takes them in his and just looks at me.

“Don't be afraid to ask questions or to make your thoughts known, we are all very understanding and we all know this is new to you. We were not always this good. It took time and a lot of communication for this to work. Even if you don't want to talk to all of us at once please come and tell me if something is bothering you or if you have a question, I will never judge you and neither would the guys but I know it can be intimidating. Just know I am here okay?” He says looking me in the eyes to make sure I truly understand what he is saying.

“Thank you Hannie, I really appreciate it. I will come to you if anything else happens.” I say giving him a kiss on the cheek.

We both go back to the living room hand in hand. Chan stole my spot on the couch so once Jisung sits down he pulls me on his lap where I proceed to drape my legs over chans lap. We all stay in the living room for a while just talking as a group while some of us stare off every once and a while zoning in on the k-drama on the tv. After a while we all decide to go our separate ways to get ready for our dinner tonight.

Hans’s pov-

After we all decided it was time to get ready for dinner I went back to mine and Lee Knows room. Minho followed me there and shut the door behind us.

“Is she okay?” He asked.

“What do you mean?” I asked, trying to sound dumb.

“Hannie, I saw you follow her to the kitchen and I saw her zoning out.” He said more sternly.

“Okay fine, yes she's okay now. She was overhing a bit so I just talked to her and answered some questions. She is new to all of this so we have to be careful with her. You remember how Felix and I acted at one point. I don't want her getting to that point.” I said, sounding more defensive than I meant to.

“Hannie of course I remember, you ran off for a week and ignored all of us and Felix had a breakdown where he wouldn't leave his room for anything. I don't want her to get to that point but she needs to talk about it if it is happening.” He said, sounding concerned.

“It's fine now, we talked about it.” I said letting out a huff.

My back is to Minho so he grabs me by the shoulders and turns me around to face him.

“I believe you, I think you did help her and I am so happy you can do that for her, but if it gets worse don't take it on all by yourself. It was Seungmins comment wasn't it?”

“Yeah, it just got her in her own head. Trust me I know if I need to I can ask for help from you guys but right now she doesnt want that so until she wants it or needs it I am going to be there for her and help ease her mind.” I said

“Okay good. I just don't want you to take on too much.” He said giving me a kiss on my cheek.

“I know, thank you. I just want to help her.” I said.

“I know. Now come on, let's get ready for dinner.” He said.

We both went back to getting ready with everyone agreeing to wear more casual clothes.

Y/n’s pov-

We all decided to dress more casual but still look nice so I decided to wear a pair of black jeans with a flowy black tank top with a red rose print on it and a simple pair of black laced up sandals. I did some simple base makeup and just wore my hair down in some loose waves. I left my room onceI felt ready and walked towards the kitchen near the front door. Felix, Han, and Minho where already there and ready to leave. We stood by the door conversating while waiting for the others to be ready. The others slowly trickled in with I.N. being the last one to join us. We all left the house and arrived at a Korean baroque and hot pot place where we had a private dining room in the back. As we all went to sit down Han gave me a look to sit next to him so I squeezed Chan's hand and signaled that I was going to be sitting with Han. I ended up seated between Han and Minho. Once I sat down Lee Knows hand was on my left thigh while Han held my right hand. As soon as the conversation picked up within the group Han leaded over to whisper in my ear.

“How are you doing now?” He asked, giving my hand a squeeze.

“I'm okay. I promise.” I said, giving him a smile.

Chan suddenly stood up to make an announcement.

“I know this is our last free night but remember we do have work tomorrow so make sure to drink lightly and not to party too hard if we have any hopes of making it to the company on time tomorrow.” He said while he gave a knowing look around the table.

There was an outburst of boo’s then laughter as he sat back down before we were served. There were bottles of soju ordered and an ary of meats and vegetables to pick from throughout the night. We ate and talked to our hearts content and left before anyone could have too much fun. We all go back outside to the car and Chan grabs my hand telling me silently that he wants me to sit next to him. Once situated in the car and on our way back to the house he leans over to talk to me.

“Listen we all have to be up very early tomorrow to start recording so Changbin, Han and I will be gone most of the day, the rest of the boys will be in and out. You're more than welcome to join us or do your own thing but I think it's best you stay in your room tonight so none of us wake you up at dawn.” He said with a sad look on his face.

“It's okay Channie, I'll be alright. I can use the sleep and don't worry about leaving me, I will keep myself busy.” I said, giving him a smile.

“I love you so much okay? I just want you to know that. This is going to be hectic but we will make it work.” He said looking down sadly.

“I love you too Chan, it will be okay.” I said giving him a kiss.

He then rested his head on my shoulder the rest of the ride back home. Once we arrived we all went in and said our goodnights before it got too late. Everyone went to their rooms to get some much needed sleep before the hectic schedule to come ahead.

Taglist: @strawberry31 @ihrtlix @minnieprincess85

#skz x reader #skz #bang chan #slow burn #han jisung #lee felix #lee know

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our-time-is-now · 2 years ago

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September 17, 2019 (4): I’m here… you can let it all out…

(previous play)

You can find more information about the authors, translators, content warning and additional information about the plays in the pinned post on our blog.

Attention! This play includes transgender topics. For more details see our interjection.

Tuesday, 6:44 pm:

David: *really got the okay to go home during rounds this morning and was super happy* *has planned everything with Alex, Hans and Matteo and then started to pack when his mother arrived, who helped him with the rest - especially with the things that were further up in the wardrobe* *was happy to have her to himself again and made her tell him what she thought of the flatshare, Hans and Linn* *they had a pretty emotional moment where she told him that she’d really like to spend more time with him and that she’d like to come more often* *had just gotten his bearings again when Alex arrived and then he spent half an hour with Alex and his mother before she went back to Lychen* *then had to spend what felt like an eternity waiting for his discharge papers and they were finally able to leave the hospital around 1 pm* *really has some trouble getting out of Alex’ car again and feels a little pathetic that Alex really has to help him with it* *gets his bag and food basket carried by Alex and takes a deep breath when he’s finally at the flatshare and especially in their room* *immediately gets ordered to the bed by Alex, before he disappears to the kitchen to make coffee and a few sandwiches* *uses the time to enjoy that he’s really back in their bed again and sniffs Matteo’s pillow for some time* *then gets up again to unpack his bag, but gets a punishing look from Alex for it when he comes back to the room, therefore goes back to bed, after Alex has arranged the pillows so that he can sit comfortably upright leaning onto them and first has some coffee and sandwiches with him* *then they decide to watch some Netflix and forget the time a little while doing so* *is a little surprised when he suddenly hears the apartment door and when a moment later, Hans is standing in the room and throws himself onto the bed to join them: “Awww, I was so looking forward to having you back! Am I allowed to hug you or does that break something?!”* *grins and sits up a little straighter* Everything’s good - you can hug me carefully… *gets a hug and then follows the conversation between Alex and Hans in amusement, where Hans makes sure that Alex has taken good care of David* *eventually interrupts Hans and assures him again that Alex did everything right and is glad that Hans is finally satisfied* *then hears him tell them that Michi will also be here soon and can see him hesitate, but finally invite Alex to stay for dinner, as well* *talks to Alex some more after Hans has disappeared to the kitchen to start cooking, until Laura comes home, who is really honestly happy to see him, as are Linn and Michi, who eventually come home from work shortly after 6* *gets a little nervous when it’s approaching 7 pm and is quite glad that Linn and Laura disappear to their rooms after they greeted him and that Michi has disappeared to the kitchen to join Hans* *then hears Alex, who also says that he’ll look if Hans still needs help and knows exactly that he only does it to allow Matteo and him time to reunite just the two of them* *eventually can no longer stand being in bed, gets up, sits down on his desk chair and spins back and forth on it* *then finally hears the apartment door and Hans calling loudly from the kitchen: “Oh, my butterfly! You’re right on time! Dinner will be ready in a minute!”*

Matteo: *has rushed from the station to the flatshare so that he can immediately turn back and catch the next train* *runs up the stairs and then throws the apartment door open* *goes inside and can hear and see Hans* Man, Hans, I don’t have time. And what are you doing here anyways? I thought you went to the movies! Oh, whatever… I have to leave again straight away… *doesn’t hear Hans’ answer, because he’s already on his way to his room* *really only wants to quickly grab the letter and leave again* *opens the door and wants to go to the desk* *but stops in his tracks when he sees David sitting there* *feels like his heart has skipped a beat* *can only stare at him* What… how… what are you doing here?

David: *hears Matteo’s reply to Hans and feels his heartbeat speed up a little when the door opens and Matteo comes into the room* *immediately feels like he’s properly back home again only now* *smiles broadly when he sees him and almost feels sorry because he looks a little overwhelmed* *gets up from the desk chair and slightly shrugs one shoulder at his question* *smiles and says quietly* There was a change of plans that I can live with quite well… like being back with you one day sooner… *takes two steps toward him and reaches his arms out for him*

Matteo: *is still staring at him as if he were an hallucination* You were… released? You didn’t run away? *then sees him coming toward him and really realizes only now that he’s really here* *quickly goes the last step and wraps his arms around him* *then laughs quietly* You’re really here… *holds the embrace, but moves his head so that he can kiss him* *immediately kisses him again and then again* *then looks at him and smiles happily* Hey… welcome home…

David: *laughs quietly and then holds his hurting stomach* *confirms* Officially released! I didn’t run! *takes a deep breath when he’s finally in Matteo’s arms and closes his eyes* *squeezes him as close as possible without it hurting* *nods at his realization and murmurs quietly* I wanted to surprise you… *leans toward him when he kisses him and smiles when one kiss turns into three* *holds the third one for a little longer and then returns his gaze happily* *grins slightly* Hey… thanks… *kisses him again briefly and then says quietly* Sorry that you had to stress so much right now… I just couldn’t think of anything else to get you to go to the flatshare instead of the hospital…

Matteo: *laughs slightly* Surprise was successful… *somehow still can’t believe that he’s really here* *runs one hand through his hair but then immediately wraps his arm around him again* *gets another kiss and smiles immediately* *then laughs slightly* It’s okay… it was worth it… *kisses him again and then beams at him* Oh man, you’re really here again… oh, that’s why Hans is here and cooks?

David: *smiles when Matteo says that the surprise was successful and slightly leans his head against his hand when he runs it through his hair* *grins a little when he says that the surprise was worth the stress and murmurs quietly* That’s good then… *laughs briefly and nods* I’m really here… and I’ll stay here… with you… and we can finally fall asleep next to each other again… *sounds wistful* *then nods again* Yes, Hans and Alex were the only ones who knew. Dr. von Fratschen already said during rounds yesterday that maybe I could go home today already. But I didn’t want us to get our hopes up too much and to then be disappointed if it didn’t work out. So I only told Alex and Hans that it might be… *lifts his hand and puts it on his cheek* *tenderly runs his thumb over it and would love to lift it up higher into his hair, but can feel that this doesn’t really work just yet* *leaves his hand on his cheek and tenderly kisses him again* *then leans his forehead against Matteo’s and murmurs quietly* Now we really made it… those two stupid separations…

Matteo: *smiles and nods* Yes, finally falling asleep next to each other and waking up together again… *then nods slightly when he talks, but is more occupied with running his hand along his back and arm and neck and letting it slip back into his hair again* *then leans into David’s hand when he puts it on his cheek* *kisses him back and smiles at his murmurs* We made it… finally… *kisses him again and then looks at him* *asks quietly* And you’re really okay? Not too strenuous? *runs his hand through his hair* What did the doctor say? Bedrest? Oh, and what about the ointment?

David: *humms in agreement and happily when Matteo confirms again that they made it and enjoys Matteo’s touches* *kisses him back and then smiles slightly at his question* *nods* I’m good… due to such a weird caring guy I learned to take some care of myself and to rest when it gets too exhausting… *briefly elbows him and looks at him lovingly* The doctor said just that… listen to my body and not overexert myself. Resting in between… but no firm bedrest… *then sighs when he mentions the ointment and slightly shrugs his shoulders* The ointment is perfect… apparently pretty expensive, that’s why it’s not prescribed and can only be bought privately… but one of the best ointments for wound healing… but I’m only supposed to start with it once the wounds aren’t quite so fresh anymore… that takes some more time… *then hears Hans calling: “I’ll give you three more minutes to make out! Then we’ll eat! Otherwise everything will get cold!”* *grins slightly and sighs* I almost forgot what it’s like to live in a flatshare… *pulls him a little closer again, kisses him and murmurs into the kiss* We still have two minutes and fifty seconds…

Matteo: *laughs a little* Has to be a pretty strong guy… *but then nods when he tells him what the doctor said* Okay, that should be manageable… *grimaces slightly when he tells him about the ointment* Ugh, so it’s a good ointment, to boot? That sucks! *grimaces slightly and then shakes his head* Oh, whatever, if it helps that’s great. You’ll just take it and forget where it came from* *laughs when Hans calls and even more so when David sighs* After three days? Oh come on… *but then gets kissed and grins* 2 minutes 45 seconds… *wraps his arms around him a little tighter and kisses him for longer* *afterwards murmurs quietly* Mi sei mancato *and then kisses him again*

David: *nods mock serious* Yes… a pretty strong cool guy… *laughs quietly when Matteo says the fact that the ointment is good sucks, but stops right afterwards because ouch, and only grins* *nods* I already forgot where it came from… but if it’s empty and if it was good then I’ll still mention that fact to my mother… *then grins a little outraged* Three days!? It was five!!! Well, okay… four and a half… *but then doesn’t want to argue about it any further and instead wants to use the remaining time to kiss Matteo* *is scared for a moment that Matteo squeezes him too tightly when he wraps his arms around him tighter, but then realizes that it’s just right, and relaxes and hugs and kisses him back* *smiles at his words and it takes a moment until he knows how he can answer* *murmurs into the kiss* mi sei mancato anche tu… molto molto mancato… *but then hears from the kitchen: “30 more seconds…”* *calls back* We’re coming! *smiles at Matteo again and then slowly lets go of him*

Matteo: *nods slightly* Yes, your mother will surely be happy… *then laughs slightly* Yes, okay, four… I suppressed that… *then beams when David answers in Italian* You see… a natural. *sighs when Hans calls and quickly kisses David again* Can you even sit on the stools? *reaches for his hand and opens the door* *but then sees that Hans has prepared the living room for dinner* *then also sees Hans and Alex coming from the kitchen with bowls and hears Hans announce: “There you are! David will pick a seat and if it doesn’t work then we’ll move to your room and he can lie down!”* *grins slightly and looks at David to see if that’s ok* Sounds good… *then grins at Alex* Hey… everything good? *only sees him nod and smiles a little*

David: *grins when Matteo says that he’s a natural* Nonsense… I just learn the really important things right at the beginning… *nods at his question about the stools* It’ll work… and if not, then I’ll tell you… *entwines their fingers when Matteo reaches for his hand and smiles slightly, because he thinks it’s cute that Matteo does it for the short way to the kitchen, but then realizes that they only have to go to the living room because Hans has set everything up there* *hears Hans’ words, smiles and sees Laura grin: “He prohibited us from already sitting down so that you’ll have free choice of seating…”* *laughs quietly and shakes his head* You could have sat down… *but then quickly chooses the spot on the couch back by the window, so that everyone else can also sit down* *sees everyone looking at him worried when he grimaces slightly while sitting down and wheezes slightly* Everything’s good… once I’m sitting down it’s okay… only sitting down and getting back up still sucks… *hears Hans sigh: “We’ll get you back on your feet… okay, I’ll serve David so that he doesn’t have to move, for the rest it’s self-service…”* *then sees Michi coming out of Hans’ room with a tray that has legs: “Do you mean that? Oh, hi Matteo…”* *sees Hans beam: “Exactly! Great, thanks!” and sees him unfold the tray and position it above him* *grins* Wow… you really thought of everything… *sees everyone else now sitting down, as well, and beams at everyone* *says a little embarrassed* Nice to be back again…

Matteo: *laughs and shakes his head* Okay, whatever you say… *nods when he says that he’ll tell him* Okay, good. *then grins when they’re standing in the living room and Laura tells them that they weren’t allowed to sit down* I like that… *but then thinks that David also puts himself in the background and plans on not forgetting about it in case they talk about the topic again* *sees David sit down and Michi come in with the tray* Hi Michi… *watches everyone sit down and quickly secures the spot next to David on the couch* *sees Hans serve David and carefully position the plate on his tray and hand him the cutlery* *then hears him announce: “Now everyone may help themselves!”* *laughs when immediately everyone starts bustling noisily to serve themselves* *leans back a little and grabs a pillow, puts it in his lap and puts the plate on the pillow* Thanks, Hans… enjoy!

David: *smiles when Matteo sits down next to him and leans his knee against Matteo’s* *then hears Linn say: “It’s nice that you’re back again… and Matteo, as well…”* *grins slightly* True, he basically wasn’t really here, either… I’m sorry that I stole him from you guys… *hears Michi: “I think everyone here forgives you. It’s normal that you want your loved ones around you when you’re at the hospital…”* *then accepts the plate from Hans and thanks him* *grins when everyone else is throwing themselves at the food and waits until everyone has their food before also saying* Enjoy! And yes, thank you for cooking and getting everyone together and so on… *sees Hans wave it off: “Poppycock, enjoy the food, guys! I’m glad that I have all my sheep together again… only Mia is missing, then we’d be complete.” and hears Michi: “You do realize that David and Laura will move out again once Mia comes back? I feel like you like to suppress that fact…” and Laura: “Oh, speaking of, David! I’m going to check out two apartments this week… if there’s a fit for us, then I’ll send you photos… once you’re fit again then you’ll just join me, okay?”* *is a little surprised that Laura has already started looking for apartments, but should have figured it because it really is sensible* *but still doesn’t really want to deal with the topic and therefore only nods* Okay, we’ll do that… thanks! *hears Hans groan: “Please just let me suppress this topic for as long as possible and stop talking about it…”*

Matteo: *grins slightly at Linn’s words but is mostly preoccupied with eating* *only perks his ears again when Laura says that she has apartments to look at* *can feel a small tug and doesn’t like that one bit* *feels like he and David haven’t really been able to enjoy living together properly because there was always something going on* *doesn’t want them to already look for apartments again* *but doesn’t say anything, of course* *is quite glad when Hans says that he wants to suppress that topic* *looks up and sees that Alex is looking over at him and that he smiles slightly when he looks at him* *then hears him say: “I talked to Mia on the phone yesterday, she told me to say a hearty hi to everyone… maybe we could take a photo for her later. Oh and Hans, she said that she has prepared a package with you know what.”*

David: *is quite glad that Hans says they should stop talking about it, because he doesn’t really want to deal with it just yet, himself* *is therefore relieved when Alex changes the topic and smiles slightly* Tell her hi back… *nods at the photo and then looks at Hans curiously when Alex mentions that Mia is going to send him a package* *can see that everyone else is also looking at him curiously and that Hans is getting a little embarrassed and has to grin* *hears him cover it up by saying: “Oh, how wonderful! We’ll definitely take a photo for her after dinner!”* *then hears Laura: “What is she sending you!?”* *now grins a little wider and says* I’d also like to know that. And why is it only you who gets something and we don’t!? *looks at Alex questioningly, who only shrugs his shoulders: “Don’t ask me, I don’t know anything - I’m only the messenger!”* *slightly lifts his eyebrows and looks back at Hans questioningly, who only says: “Maybe Mia simply loves me more than you guys…”* *sees Linn shake her head seriously: “I don’t think so. Alex comes first, then there’s Hanna, then Kiki, then Amira and Sam on the same level, and then us - also on the same level. I just don’t know on which level the other boys are… maybe I’ll ask Mia…”* *has to chuckle slightly, nods and looks back at Hans questioningly*

Matteo: *smiles slightly when the topic really changes and they’re talking about Mia and Hans and her package for him* *then smiles even more when Linn tries to put people in an order* I don’t think that Mia even has a fixed order… I think she loves all of us, just differently… *sees Linn looking at him, apparently considering it, and then sees her nod: “I like that, yes, I love all of you, just differently.”* *hears Laura choke on her drink and looks over to her in worry* *then hears Alex again: “But I still have one question: Why does it actually only say Laura in the cleaning roster on the kitchen? Did she lose a bet?”* *hears Hans laugh and shake his head: “That was Matteo, no idea why… Laura, do you know why? Did you annoy him?”*

David: *smiles at Matteo’s idea that Mia loves everyone equally but just differently, but can see Alex lifting his eyebrows skeptically* *can somehow also understand that a little* *then hears Linn and smiles even more because that somehow fits her* *briefly looks at Laura when she chokes, but can see that she’s quickly okay on her own again and that she doesn’t need help* *was just about to say that for him, Matteo is definitely in first place, but afterwards probably everyone else, just differently, when Alex asks the question about the cleaning roster* *grins slightly but hears Laura groan: “When I talked to Matteo for the first time back at the neon party, I said that it’s a cool apartment and asked if there’s a cleaning roster… no idea why. Was just smalltalk somehow to start up a conversation with the guy my brother was constantly talking about…”* *groans* Exactly… /constantly/… *hears Hans laugh: “Feel free to admit it, my butterfly-boyfriend… it’s nice…”* *sees him turn to Matteo: “And you figured if she’s asking about the cleaning roster so offensively then she can clean by herself for a month?!”* *hears Alex: “Umm, does that mean that no one really cleaned up here properly in two weeks!?”*

Matteo: *grins slightly at Laura’s answer* Exactly, smalltalk… and what did you think you’d learn about me with this topic? *then also laughs when David immediately complains and nudges him slightly* It’s okay… *then also sees Laura grin again: “Yes, definitely constantly… Laura, this guy was really sooo cool and I was totally stupid… Laura, he has a girlfriend… Laura no, really, there’s nothing going on… Laura, we only ate a sandwich… Laura, I’m really stupid, why did I text him that?”* *bites down on his bottom lip a little* *finds it really a bummer that Laura just says all of this here* *therefore says* Well, I felt the same… I just didn’t have anyone to complain to… well, Hans a little and later the boys… but that’s just what it’s like, right? *sees Hans nod quickly: “Absolutely! If you’re in love then you need someone to let it all out to.”* *presses his lips together when it’s quiet for a moment and then hears Alex say: “You guys do realize that no one answered the cleaning question?”* *laughs slightly and then says* Well, I didn’t clean, I was barely here…

David: *grins slightly at Matteo’s question to Laura, but then looks at her a little warningly when she disagrees with him* *blushes when she really starts and says pleadingly and admonishingly* Laura, stop it… *then gets really embarrassed when she continues and would love to sink into the couch because he’s so embarrassed* *looks at her angrily, but doesn’t want to get into it with her in front of everyone, but still thinks that it’s a no-go and that he urgently has to talk to her* *is grateful to Matteo and Hans that they immediately show solidarity with him, presses his knee a little more against Matteo’s and murmurs at Hans’ words* You should just be careful that you don’t let it out to the wrong people… *finds the silence that arises afterwards pretty uncomfortable and pokes around in his food* *then hears Alex ask about the cleaning roster again and has to chuckle slightly* *is glad that he breaks the silence and nods at Matteo’s words, because he actually barely did anything, either* *hears Hans: “Well, I thought Laura does everything… it said so on the roster…” and Laura: “As if… pfff” and then Linn: “I just cleaned everything a little bit because I didn’t know if it was my turn…”* *then has to grin a little, after all, and hears Michi: “Well at least someone…”* *looks at Linn lovingly and compassionately at the same time* Oh, Linn… *then looks at everyone* Let’s update the cleaning roster… and Linn gets the next two weeks off, because she was the only one who did anything the last two weeks…

Matteo: *looks at Linn in surprise* Thanks, Linn, that’s nice of you… *only sees her smile* *then nods vigorously at David’s words* Yes, I’m also in favor of that… and I can make a new one, I’m the one who messed up the old one… *sees everyone nod and Michi and Alex only grin* *hears Michi say to Alex: “Are you also glad sometimes that you don’t live at a flatshare?”* *hears Alex answer: “I’m especially glad that I have a cleaning lady.”* *laughs slightly* Snob… *sees him shrug: “I can live quite well with that.”* *also shrugs one shoulder and then continues eating*

David: *nods at Matteo’s suggestion* I like that, thanks! *then grins slightly at the exchange of words between Alex and Michi, and also at Matteo’s comment* If I had the money then I’d also have one… *then also continues eating and talks to the other some more* *can feel that the mood between Laura and him is pretty chilly once again, but realizes after some time that he can live with that quite well right now - because he thinks that whatever is bothering or burdening her at the moment doesn’t justify her making him look like a fool in front of everyone* *still plans on talking to her as soon as possible* *then gets ordered by everyone to stay sitting there while the dishes are brought back to the kitchen, and feels a little bad that the others have to do all the work* *afterwards, he sits together with the others for a little longer, leaning against Matteo a little, but notices at some point that it’s getting really exhausting, that he has to lie down and that most of all, he has to take some painkillers* *eventually says quietly* I think I have to go lie down… *sees Hans jump up immediately and take the tray off his lap, where he had put his glass down: “Sure… you really managed quite long… can we do anything else for you? Do you need anything? Something to drink delivered to your bedside? Anything else?”* *smiles and tiredly shakes his head* No, thanks, everything’s good… *looks at Alex* Thanks again for picking me up… and for carrying everything… and for pulling me out of the car… *and to Hans* …and thank you for cooking and catering… *sees both of them wave it off and then lifts himself up off the couch with quite some pain, but tries to not let anything show*

Matteo: *is sitting together with the others, one arm loosely wrapped around David* *then hears him say quietly that he has to lie down* *looks at him proudly and is happy that he is taking care of himself* *smiles slightly when everyone jumps up and when Hans immediately coddles him* *tries to help him with getting up* *grins at Hans* I’ll take over from here… thanks… *then waves at everyone again, especially at Alex* See you… *goes to their room with David and hurries to the bed to throw the blanket back and fluff up the pillow and lean it against the wall* Is it okay like that? Or do you need more pillows? Should I get Hans’ tray for you? Reaching to your side doesn’t really work, does it? I’ll just go get it and also some water… or do you want something else? *doesn’t really notice that he’s doing the same thing Hans just did, but simply wants David to feel comfortable*

David: *grins slightly when Matteo says that he’ll take over from here, also says his goodbyes to everyone and hears Alex say that he’ll also leave now* *goes to their room with Matteo and smiles when he immediately fixes the bed for him* *then has to chuckle despite his tiredness and pain when he starts babbling and offering help just like Hans, and steps toward him* *puts his arms on his hips and looks at him lovingly* *hesitates briefly and then says* I’ll tell you if I need anything, okay? *smiles* The pillows are enough and so is our nightstand… water would be good… *pulls him a little closer toward him and kisses him* *then looks at him again and says quietly* But what I need the most is you… *grins slightly and adds* …and a painkiller…

Matteo: *takes a deep breath when David comes toward him and touches him* *smiles slightly* Yes, please… *then nods* Okay… *realizes that he must have been similarly jittery and overprotective* Sorry… but I… just want you to be okay, alright? *sighs when he says that he needs him* *then laughs slightly at his addition* Okay, water, painkiller, me… I can get all of that… *kisses him quickly and runs a hand through his hair* You go lie down and I’ll get everything, ok? *lets go of him and looks for his bag* *but can’t see it* Did you already unpack your stuff? Where are your painkillers?

David: *looks slightly worried when Matteo takes a deep breath* *doesn’t want him to worry, but knows that the situation isn’t really easy for him, either* *slightly shakes his head when he apologizes, but then nods* I promised to tell you and that I’ll take care of myself, okay? And you’re still allowed to worry… that’s okay… because I know that you can’t just turn it off so easily, anyways. But… everything’s good, okay? *then smiles when he says that he can get all of that and asks with a slight grin* You can get yourself? Very good… *kisses him back and then nods* I’ll just quickly go to the bathroom to brush my teeth and to pee and then I’ll lie down… then I won’t have to get up again… *turns to the door, but then hears Matteo’s question* *points next to the wardrobe where his bag is sitting* I started… until Alex ordered me to lie back down again… the painkillers are in the toiletry bag… *knows that he should slowly discontinue using them and decided to only take one in the morning and at night over the next few days*

Matteo: *nods and smiles slightly at David*s little speech* Okay, everything’s good… and I’ll try to worry less even though I’m allowed to… *grins slightly* *nods when he says that he’ll go to the bathroom* *then sees his bag and goes over to it* Don’t you need the toiletry bag? *sees David grin and nod* *pulls it from the bag* *takes out the painkillers and then hands the bag to David, who disappears to the bathroom* *puts the painkillers on the small shelf next to the bed* *sees the MP3 player that David gave him* *takes it and puts it on the desk, because now he doesn’t need it anymore to fall asleep* *goes to the kitchen and gets a big bottle of water and two glasses* *brings it back to the room* *then goes to the wardrobe and takes out a sleep shirt for David, because they’re up high in the wardrobe* *then kisses David when he comes back in and then also goes to the bathroom*

David: *is already on his way to the door when Matteo asks him about the toiletry bag* *grins, because he’s so out of it, and takes it from him* It was a long day, I can’t think straight anymore… *then disappears to the bathroom, pees, washes himself and brushes his teeth* *thinks about how nice it is to be back here again and feels his heart swell at the thought of finally being able to fall asleep next to Matteo again in a minute* *goes back to Matteo's room after rinsing his mouth and sees that he already prepared everything and that he even got a fresh sleep shirt for him from the wardrobe* *tenderly runs a hand over Matteo’s side when he kisses him, before he also disappears to the bathroom, and murmurs quietly* Thanks… *then takes off his shirt and puts his sleep shirt on with some effort, and steps out of his pants* *then pours water for himself and Matteo into the glasses and finally takes his painkiller before lying down in the bed* *takes a deep breath and feels a tugging and burning in his belly, because sitting up for so long really was pretty exhausting, but can also feel his body slowly relaxing thanks to lying down and the well-known and familiar surroundings* *hopes that the painkiller will kick in soon and waits for Matteo with a smile*

Matteo: *comes back into the room, only wearing boxer shorts* *grins at David and then drops his dirty laundry on the armchair* *pulls his sleep shirt out from under the blanket on his side, and puts it on* *then crawls under the blanket and holds an arm out* Better if you lie down on me than the other way around, right? *sees David nod and smile and feels him lie down on him* *wraps his arm around him and kisses his head* *breathes him in and is suddenly surrounded by the typical David-smell* *thinks that he’s really here, with him, in their bed, sound and healthy and well on is way to getting better* *suddenly feels a wave of tension and stress from the last few days, and actually weeks, falling off of him and suddenly hears himself sob* *doesn’t even know where that’s coming from and quickly swallows hard* *but can already feel tears and buries his face in David’s hair*

David: *can feel his heart skip a beat when Matteo finally joins him, and smiles broadly when he holds his arms out* *humms in agreement and says quietly* I think so… tomorrow, we’ll try it the other way round… *closes the last few centimeters between them and ignores the pain when he has to strain his abdominal muscles to do so, because he knows that he can relax again in a second and even turns a little onto his side, so that he can put an arm down on Matteo’s belly* *takes a deep breath and can feel how happy he is to be back here again… in their room, but especially with Matteo, and how good it feels to know that tonight, there won’t be a night nurse coming in to kick Matteo out* *was just about to close his eyes to enjoy the moment even more when he suddenly hears a sob* *at first thinks that he misheard it, but then hears him swallow and can feel him burying his face in his hair* *can feel everything inside him constrict at the thought that Matteo might really be crying, moves away from him a little and turns his head upward so that he can look at him* *murmurs quietly and comfortingly* Hey… *ignores all the pain and stretches up to kiss his chin* *runs his hand over his stomach, until he reaches Matteo’s cheek and strokes over it* *asks a little insecurely but lovingly* What’s wrong, tesorino?

Matteo: *snuffles slightly and somehow thinks of himself as pretty stupid and silly right now* *then feels David move and quickly wipes over his face* *presses his lips together when he hears his “hey”* *swallows when he feels his hand but can’t look at him* *but then hears his question and looks at him, after all* *wipes over his eyes again but then has to let out another sob, just because David is so great and tender and worried and simply there* I don’t know… *sees his skeptical look* Really… I don’t know… I’m not sad… I *takes a deep breath* I… that somehow has to get out apparently…

David: *sees Matteo wipe over his face and feels a small lump in his throat when he realizes that Matteo really is crying* *is glad when he finally looks at him, after all, and tries a confident little smile to signal him that everything is okay* *tenderly slips his hand a little higher and wipes a tear off his cheek* *then hears him say that he isn’t sad and is at first a little relieved, but then also thinks that it just might have been too much for Matteo over the last few days* *nods slightly when he says that it somehow has to get out and, ignoring the pain, scoots a little upward* *kisses him tenderly on the mouth and says quietly* I’m here… you can let it all out… *tries to pull him a little closer by slipping his hand to the back of his neck, but isn’t really strong enough yet to really support and hold him the way he wants to* *therefore murmurs quietly* Come here…

Matteo: *sighs when he gets kissed* *snuffles pretty loudly when he hears his words and can somehow only nod right now* *still feels weird and somehow floaty but also heavy at the same time* *then rolls a little closer to David when he lifts his hand much too high again* *lightly puts his head against his shoulder, but is careful to not put too much weight onto him* *nudges his nose against his neck but feels like he’s getting his shirt all wet with his tears* *but feels that the crying just won’t stop and that one time, his whole body even shakes* *therefore simply keeps pressing close to David and wraps his arm around him* *thinks that it doesn’t matter anymore, anyways, and that he can just finish crying, whatever the reason*

David: *tenderly strokes over Matteo’s cheek when the tears are still flowing, before he tries to pull him closer* *is glad that Matteo turns toward him and squeezes him a little closer* *lets him cry, strokes his back and kisses his hair* *can feel that he’s also getting a small lump in his throat, simply because this overwhelms him a lot, but swallows it down to be there for Matteo* *can feel his neck and shirt getting wet, but doesn’t care about it at all right now* *is glad and a little proud that Matteo lets it out - whatever the reason for it - that he trusts him, and just hopes that he’ll feel better afterwards* *squeezes him closer when his entire body shakes and quietly murmurs some random words to show him that he’s here* Everything’s okay… *kisses his hair again and whispers quietly* I love you so much… everything’s okay… *thinks that maybe all of the tension from the last few weeks is falling off him right now and realizes only now how much this must have been for him - the move, the Voluntary Year, the weekend seminar, the surgery, worrying about him, commuting to and from the hospital - and that Matteo barely had time to take a breather and to rest* *plans on making sure over the next few days that he can relax a little*

Matteo: *had considered holding back the tears earlier* *but has now given up on that and simply sobs quietly into David’s neck* *can feel and also hear his words* *can also feel that they register with him and that they calm him down, but also that his body apparently isn’t done crying* *but then eventually feels the tears lessening, after all, and the sobbing, as well* *but remains lying down like this and can feel that, miraculously, he really feels better* *he also feels weird because of the crying, but also more relaxed* *sighs slightly and presses a tender kiss against David’s neck before slowly pulling away and looking up at him* *presses his lips together and grimaces slightly because he doesn’t know what to say* *but then sees David’s worried expression and says* I think I’m done…

David: *can feel Matteo’s shaking lessen a little at some point and also that the sobbing lessens* *simply holds him and runs a comforting hand over his back and through his hair* *has forgotten about his own pain for now - maybe the painkiller is also working by now* *eventually hears Matteo sigh and feels a kiss on his neck* *smiles slightly, but gets serious again when he slowly pulls away* *looks at him worried and tenderly strokes a strand of hair off his forehead* *then has to grin slightly when he says that he thinks he’s done and asks a little teasingly* Sure? *then kisses him and sighs quietly* *looks at him lovingly and then says quietly* The last few weeks really were a lot… it probably really just had to get out… *wants to tell him that he should take care of himself and that he has to make sure that it isn’t getting too much for him, but bites back on it for now*

Matteo: *smiles slightly when he asks so teasingly* *thinks that he really loves him very much* *nods* Yes, sure… I’m finished with crying… *then gets kissed and can kiss back better this time* *swallows slightly when he says that the last few weeks really were a lot* *would usually deny it, claim that it was a lot more for David and that he doesn’t know why he’s being so difficult* *but then looks at David and remembers his recording and that he wants to be there for him and thinks that it really should be a give and take in a relationship* *therefore nods slightly* Yes, maybe it really was a little too much… *slowly rolls onto his back again, or rather halfway onto his side and tenderly pulls David close* …still no excuse to lie on your scars… sorry…

David: *smiles when he confirms that he’s sure to have finished crying* *then nods seriously when he confirms that it was a lot and thinks in hindsight that Matteo managed to keep afloat for a really long time and that he probably would have managed it a lot longer if he had to* *growls slightly when he rolls away from him, but scoots after him and positions himself halfway on his shoulder again* *softly hits him on the stomach when he apologizes and says with a slight grin* It wasn’t about me for a change but about you… if I had been in unbearable pain I would have told you… *then looks up at him again and says more seriously* Let’s take it easier again over the next few days… only you and I after work… relaxing and chilling and resting and taking a breather and rest, okay?

Matteo: *laughs slightly when he hits him on the stomach* Yeees, sorry, sorry, okay… *looks down to him when he gets more serious and listens to him* *smiles tenderly and moves his head so that he can kiss him* Sounds fantastic… we’ll do that… *kisses him again and then looks at him tenderly* *smiles slightly and then says quietly* Ti amo, tesorino… *puts his head back again and runs his hand through David’s hair* Let’s sleep, okay? I have to get up earlier tomorrow, but I’ll let you sleep, ok?

David: *grins satisfied when Matteo apologizes, but even more so because he’s laughing again* *is glad that he agrees to take it easier over the next few days, smiles and murmurs quietly* Good… *then kisses him back and quietly sighs into the kiss* *then looks at him to see if everything’s alright again, but can see him smile and smiles back automatically* *then hears his words and can feel it getting warm in his gut and feels his heart do a little jump out of love* *beams and kisses his chin when Matteo runs a hand through his hair* *quietly murmurs against his skin* Ti amo… *humms in agreement to his question and says* Maybe we’ll still see each other… I’m still in the hospital rhythm… *then turns onto his other side with some difficulty and slight pain and reaches out for the lamp on the nightstand to switch it off* *then lies down in a relaxed position and reaches for Matteo’s hand on his stomach* *closes his eyes and grumbles slightly in pleasure* *whispers quietly* It’s so nice to be back with you again…

Matteo: *feels his heart speed up when David says “ti amo”* *then also humms slightly* Yes, well, but that was also pretty early for you… *entwines their fingers when he reaches for his hand and presses a kiss to his head again* *grumbles pleasantly* *then smiles at his words and feels how true it is* *murmurs quietly* So nice… *then scoots into position a little more and pulls the blanket up* Sleep tight, Schreibner…

David: *humms in agreement, because he also found the time at which he was woken up in the hospital unbearably early* *realizes that he’s really pretty groggy and tired but happy and content to be back here again* *tenderly rubs his thumb over the back of Matteo’s hand when he entwines their fingers* *smiles when Matteo agrees and cuddles a little closer to him after he pulled the blanket up* *sighs quietly and then murmurs* Dream of us, Florenzi… *closes his eyes and falls soundly asleep pretty quickly*

(next play)

#Druck #druck og #matteo florenzi #david schreibner #davenzi #davenzi plays

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webangchan · 3 years ago

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✧✦ lovefool ✦✧ han jisung x fem!reader 1.7k words kinks & warnings: unprotected sex, semi public sex, hooking up at a party in a closet because why not, creampie, some fluff thrown in at the end because it’s jisung and i can’t help myself.

"Fuck, come here--"

Jisung collides with you in the small space and your first kiss is explosive. His lips are soft and his tongue is a tease, tracing over your bottom lip before it dives into your mouth. The kiss is full of need, a spark that's been fanned into a raging fire that threatens to consume the both of you.

"Been waiting a long time," Jisung pants, his touch roaming all over your body, never staying in one place for too long. "To get my hands on you."

"Same," you say while shifting around until your back hits a wall. It doesn't take long since this coat closet isn't very big, but you need the support to keep yourself steady. You've been drinking most of the night -- so has Jisung -- so you don't trust yourself to stay upright without some help. "Wanted you for so fucking long, Jisungie."

The way that Jisung cages you in makes you feel small despite the fact that you're a few centimeters taller than him. He plasters his front to yours, sandwiching your body between himself and the wall. You can feel how hard he is in his jeans and you let out a pathetic moan when he grabs your wrist and trails your open hand down his toned stomach until it rests over his bulge.

"Look at what you do to me," he whispers, his eyelids fluttering when you start rubbing his cock through the denim. "This is all for you, baby."

If you get any more turned on you're going to combust. A mixture of lust and adrenaline has your hands shaking when you yank at the button on his jeans, desperate to get his cock free so you can finally feel him. Wanting the same thing, Jisung helps you by shoving his pants and briefs down once you get him unbuttoned and unzipped. Not quite caring over how crude it is, you spit in your hand and wrap your fingers around his shaft, moaning with him when his cock twitches in your grip.

"I need you to fuck me," you gasp. Jisung has you pressed into the wall once more, leaving just enough room between you so you can jack him off. He kisses the hollow of your throat, his tongue darting out to taste the light sheen of sweat on your skin. "If you don't, I'll die. And then Minho will be mad at you."

Jisung laughs at that and you can’t help but laugh along with him. Minho is a good friend of yours and he's also the person who introduced you to his friend-who-just-moved-back-to-the-area Jisung over six months ago now. The attraction to Jisung was immediate but you didn't want to come on too strong so you played it safe and got to know him as a friend first. Along the way your physical attraction morphed into something more, something you found a little scary, so you kept quiet about your feelings until tonight.

Tonight, Chan is throwing a party.

Admittedly, you’re not much of a party person. But Minho baited you by saying that Jisung would be there so you got ready at the speed of light, much to Minho’s chagrin. You hitched a ride with Minho and did a shot with him as soon as you arrived before wandering off to look for Jisung. Once you found him in one of the side rooms talking to Changbin… you were speechless. He looked too damn good in that navy button up with a pair of black fitted jeans, artfully ripped at the knees. His dark brown hair was styled up and away from his forehead, his bangs just brushing the top of his eyebrow.

Feeling a bit overwhelmed, you immediately backed out of the room and marched your way through the house until you got to the kitchen where all of the alcohol is set up.

There was no way you were going to get through this while sober.

It took two more shots and a few sips of jungle juice before you could will yourself to go back to that room and talk to Jisung. But once you got there, you could no longer see him among the crowd. You blinked in confusion and there was a frown painted on your face.

“Looking for someone?”

You whipped around at the voice behind you, your heart stuttering when you saw a smiling Jisung. Emboldened by the vodka and who knows what else running through your system, you smiled back and pinched one of his squishy cheeks between your thumb and forefinger.

“Yeah. I was looking for you.”

You relinquished his cheek and let your arm drop back down to your side. Jisung’s smile grew wider at your confession.

“Any particular reason?” Jisung asked, his smile morphing into something a bit more sly. He waggled his eyebrows and while it made him look silly, you just wanted him so badly that you’re charmed by the action and more than a little turned on.

Without meaning to, you said that last bit out loud.

Jisung was on the move before you could even blink, one of his hands gripping your forearm so he could get you moving with him. He led you down two different hallways before he stopped at a door, flung it open, and shoved you inside. He followed you into the closet and shut the door behind him with a bang that was muffled by the music blasting throughout the house.

Which brings you to your current predicament. Willingly trapped in a closet with Jisung, more than ready to get fucked until the only thing you can remember is his name.

“Well, I certainly don’t want Minho to be mad at me,” Jisung says while he inches his hands up your skirt. You let out a sigh when he hooks two fingers under the band of your panties and starts pulling them down your thighs. Once the garment gets to your knees you shimmy your legs back and forth until they fall down to the floor. You quickly step out of them and hook your left leg around Jisung’s hip, pulling him in close.

Jisung holds onto your waist like a vice and rubs his cock up and down your slit, enjoying how warm and utterly soaked you are. The fact that you want him just as much as he wants you makes his head spin.

“I’m on the pill,” you state while reaching for his cock once more. You jerk him twice before guiding his cock to your hole, trembling with excitement when he starts pushing into you. “So please, fuck me like you’ve been dreaming of. Like I’ve been dreaming of.”

Jisung bites his lip and continues to push into you at a sedate pace. You’re thoroughly aroused so it doesn’t hurt, but you appreciate him going slow all the same. Your breath hitches when he’s finally buried to the hilt because you’re so pleasantly full. Jisung captures your lips in a kiss that’s filthy from the get go, all tongue and teeth, and you yelp into his mouth when he pulls his cock out of you nearly all the way before slamming back in.

Jisung’s thrusts are punishing, his hips working over time to bring you both to a pleasurable end. You’re both too keyed up to savor your first time together but it doesn’t bother you much; you know that there will be many more opportunities for it in the future. The leg that’s holding you up starts to shake and the position you’re in is growing uncomfortable, but you push through the discomfort.

“Gonna, huh, fuck, gonna come soon,” Jisung pants out between thrusts. You grip his biceps hard and throw your head back, hissing when it thunks against the wall.

“Wanna come with you,” you cry, eyes squeezed shut when Jisung starts thrusting into you even more frantically. “Please, baby. Please touch me.”

One of Jisung’s hands drops from your waist to where you’re joined together and starts rubbing firm circles on your aching clit with the pad of his thumb. You scream at the onslaught of pleasure and come around his cock that’s still pistoning inside of you mere moments later. The way that your walls flutter and clench around him turns out to be too much and Jisung thrusts into you one last time, stilling as he comes with a low moan.

Once you’ve both caught your breath and have calmed down a bit, Jisung pulls out of you completely and you let the leg you had wrapped around him fall to the floor. You feel his cum start to leak out of you and you grimace a bit, deciding that you’ll just deal with it later. You smooth your skirt back down around your hips and when Jisung hands you your panties, he’s fully dressed and mostly put back together. You slip your panties back on while Jisung reaches out to fix your hair, smoothing down the strands in the back that got mussed while you had your head against the wall.

Even after he’s done with your hair, Jisung’s touch doesn’t leave you. His palm is hot on the side of your neck and the way his thumb sweeps along the underside of your jaw makes you weak.

“I know we kinda did this backwards,” Jisung says with a chuckle. “But I really wanna take you out on a date.”

Jisung swears that the smile you grace him with is bright enough to light up the entirety of that tiny closet. You throw your arms around his shoulders and hug him tight, giggling from sheer happiness.

“What a coincidence!” you exclaim after leaning back so you can look him in the eyes. “I also want you to take me out on a date.”

Jisung grins and rubs along the plush swell of your bottom lip with his thumb before pressing a quick kiss to your parted lips.

“Breakfast tomorrow morning?”

You nod and lean in to kiss the tip of his nose, your heart warming when Jisung blushes at the gesture. He’s entirely too cute and you can hardly believe that he’s all yours.

“Sounds perfect.”

#han jisung smut #skz smut #han smut #stray kids smut #skzsmut #skz jisung smut #skz hard hours #by velma #i just love jisung A Lot okay

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little-corritrice · 2 years ago

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| The Mafia | ~ Part 16 ~

Genre: Mafia Au, Fanfiction

Pairing: | Stray Kids |

Rating: Fluff

Warnings: N/A

Synopsis ~ y/n was just living her life, but when she ran into troubles of her past, she found herself being auctioned off to a mafia named Ateez. Within her time, she soon finds another whom she knows...

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

~ The Next Morning ~

Waking up from my bed, I stretched as I sat up, yawning slightly. Chan wasn't by my side, so I got up, putting on my slippers and going to the kitchen. As I entered, Minho, Hyunjin and Jeongin were all standing around in there, Minho and Hyunjin making breakfast. I yawned again as I hugged onto Jeongin, watching as Minho threw some bacon into the pan. "Who wants to go to the beach?" I asked, looking up at the boys who just entered the room. "Oh, that would be fun." Jeongin said, patting my head. I smiled brightly, nodding in agreement. "You guys need a break, so I was talking to Chan about going to the beach for a little day vacation." I said, and they all agreed, starting to set the table as I helped Minho get the food to the table.

~ ~ ~

As I finished packing, I put my backpack over my shoulder, skipping downstairs with my bathing suit on {↑}. I had a towel hanging from my arm as I reached the bottom of the stairs, seeing no one yet. "Guys! We're supposed to be leaving right now!" I yelled loudly, adding a slight whine at the end. Almost immediately, I heard everyone yelling back that they were coming. I walked out as I laughed at the mess that was going be created. I put my thing in the car, standing near it as everyone came running from the house, all throwing their things in and trying to get in the car. "Your passenger." I smiled, patting Minho's shoulder. He rolled his eyes, getting in the car. I got in after everybody was all settled. "Alrighty! We ready?" Chan asked and we all acknowledged him someway.

Since the beach was 2 hours away, some of the kids got really bored, and decided to mess around and be really loud. "Quiet!" Minho yelled, glaring at all of the boys who were goofing off. I smirked as they were only quiet until he turned back around. As they grew louder, I sighed loudly, and they all shut up. "Man, I am really tired. But it's far too noisy to even think of sleep." I said, staring out the window. "We are sorry. Here, lay down on me." Han said, pulling my head down to rest on his shoulder. I gave a smug look to Minho as he glared at me, then the kids before turning around. And thus the rest of the trip was silent as I peacefully rested my head on Han's shoulder, and had Jeongin rubbing my head from behind the seat.

~ ~ ~

As the car pulled into the private house, I stirred awake, the jolt of the car stopping waking me up. I yawned slightly, stretching my arms in front of me. "I'm so proud of you guys." I smiled as I got out, patting each boys head head. "You managed to shut up long enough that I could sleep." I teased and they rolled their eyes, walking to the house. As I neared the house more, I saw how huge it was. I could see the inside of it, and immediately sprinted to the kitchen, grabbing myself a snack. "You really know how to cheer me up." I smiled as I turned around, seeing Chan smiling as he leaned against the counter. "Whatever makes you happy, princess." He smiled, pecking my lips as he went to find his room. "There's only 8 rooms..." Jeongin said, coming towards us as everyone gathered in the living room.

I stared at Chan, and he just shrugged. "Well, guess I'll be bunking with you, Innie." I smiled, and he cheered silently as the others complained and whined. "Now, who's ready to go party?" I exclaimed and they all got up, running outside. I went to the fridge, grabbing some snacks, and saw some maids come in and start making sandwiches. "Oh, let me help you." I smiled, and they started going crazy. "Oh, no, no, no. Miss, please. We can do this. You go have fun." They insisted, and I sighed, shaking my head. "Okay, but you can go rest after this." I said and they nodded, bowing slightly. I walked back to the fridge, grabbing a fruit wine bottle. I took a basket and set everything in it. I still had my backpack on so I went to find the room.

After finding the room, Jeongin was also in there, taking his shirt off. I carefully walked towards him, circling my arms around his waist from behind. He tensed as my hands were slightly cold, but soon relaxed in my arms. "Your hands were cold, beautiful." He said, turning around. I smiled up at him, shaking my head. "Sorry." I squealed as he threw me over his shoulder. "The others are waiting for us." He said, running out. I laughed as we made it to the kitchen, Jeongin setting me down. "Is everyone ready?" I asked and they all nodded. "Last to the beach is a rotten egg." Han screamed, everyone running out. "That's not fair!" I laughed, grabbing the snack basket. I was speed walking, trying not to break anything. Chane came over, walking besides me. "Channie, can you hold this? My arm's starting to hurt." I whined.

As he took the basket, I ran ahead, jumping onto the sand. Everyone cheered as I laughed out loud. "Chan is a rotten egg!" Everyone teased him. Het set the basket down and immediately started running at us. "Come here!" He yelled, and I laughed out, running away from him with everyone else. I screamed as he suddenly picked me up, throwing me over his shoulder. "No! Channie, I'm sorry!" I exclaimed, kicking in his arms as he ran towards the water. "Too late now!" He chuckled, tossing me in. I gasped out as I came up, staring at him. "You're so mean!" I yelled, jumping onto him as I pulled him under. Everyone ran in the water too, splashing around.

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juminsmysticmc · 4 years ago

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Pregnancy Series - Part 4.1

Going through the pregnancy

⚠️ Sensitive content -> mention of: pain, miscarriage scare, angst insecurities -> every scenario ends with a happy end! ⚠️

Pregnancy Series: Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3

Jumin

You were already 21 weeks pregnant and it had been a while since you told Jumin Han that you were pregnant.

Just a few days ago, the both of you found out that you were having a little baby boy, making your husband totally excited for his heir and the nursery.

,,I would have liked it to be both, either a girl or a boy, but knowing that our future children will have an older brother makes me happy,’’ he told you as he looked through a baby magazine for some ideas for the room of his future baby.

You looked at him. You were totally soft for Jumin’s words.

You were by now showing that you were pregnant and rubbed your belly, looking with your black haired husband into the magazine.

Jumin kept going from page to page. He already had some ideas, but he still wanted to check some things.

It was important, in his opinion, that his son had a wonderful room.

,,Mh, I think I will go and eat a snack…’’ you mumbled, ready to get up when Jumin stopped you.

,,No, stay, I will go and take you something. What do you want my love?’’ he asked you, rubbing your swollen belly as he observed you.

,,Maybe just a sandwich?’’ you mumbled and smiled when he nodded and went to the kitchen, preparing the food his wife asked for.

You weren’t allowed to do anything because he didn’t want you to overwork yourself. All he wanted you was for you to enjoy your pregnancy.

Jumin prepared the sandwich you asked for when suddenly you called him loudly; you never called him like that and all he could feel was fear.

He jumped back to the living room where you were staying on the couch, your hand on your belly.

Jumin thought about what could have made you call him like that.

,,I will call help. You just stay and-’’ without any warnings you took his hand and placed it on your belly.

Jumin stayed silent for a few seconds when he suddenly felt something odd.

As if something was… softly moving in there?

,,It’s the baby. It’s our son, Jumin….’’ you whispered, your voice was trembling as your eyes were already wet. You began to cry softly as you thought about how there was life inside of you. You were carrying the piece of love you and Jumin did together.

Jumin looked up to you and he felt… so happy.

,,My love… it’s slowly getting more and more real,’’ he whispered and let his hand rest on your belly.

He knew that this would be the new hobby of his, feeling his son’s movements.

,,We need to write it down so we can find out the pattern when he’s awake and when he’s sleeping so we quickly know that something is wrong when he’s not moving or we can wake him up when-’’

You again chuckled to Jumin as you pressed his hand stronger against your belly.

,,Jumin, enjoy this moment for a while,’’ you whispered.

Zen

Everyday, Zen laid in bed with his head on his arm as he watched you sleep.

Sometimes his hand was also on your belly.

You were slowly growing and Zen couldn’t wait to see you growing more and more.

He was so excited that he was a part of that wonderful present in your belly.

But he didn’t know that you thought the same way, at least about your body.

Slowly, he noticed how your mood swings hit you and he found you crying one evening in front of the mirror.

At first he was totally scared that you would be hurt, feel pain or have bad news for him.

But then, when you told him that you felt ugly, his eyes turned soft.

,,Better said, I will grow more and more and your fans will hate me. You will realize how ugly I am and you will leave us and I will be left with a child because I’m so big! Ugh!’’ you sobbed.

Zen hugged you and patted your hair.

,,Did anyone say anything? Because honestly, I can’t wait to see you grow. I can’t wait to see how much more our baby will grow and I can’t wait to feel the movements… you’re beautiful!’’ he whispered and kissed you.

You looked up at him as you pressed your lips together. ,,Are you sure?’’ you asked him and when he softly nodded, you laid your head against his chest again.

,,I will get stretching marks…’’ you whimpered.

,,I don’t mind. I will kiss every one of them and if you still feel uncomfortable, I heard that with baby oil, they don’t get so dark,’’ he told you.

You stayed silent.

,,Should we try it out?’’ you asked him.

,,If you want to, I can buy some and massage you,’’ he smiled.

,,Well, if you want to… I can shower now while you go to buy it? My feet feel sore to be honest and… I don’t want to have marks,’’ you told him honestly.

Zen smiled at how cute you suddenly became and so he helped you into the bathtub, scared that you could slip while he was away.

And so he quickly hurried to the shop and came back immediately just to help you out of it and help you get changed into something comfortable.

He lit some candles and put on some relaxing music before he rubbed his hands in the oil and slowly stroked your belly, putting plenty of oil on it.

He smiled as he saw how relaxed you were, how happy you smiled, and how much you enjoyed it.

He also began to massage your feet, making you moan a bit. ,,Yes, it hurts there, but it feels better if you massage me,’’ you told him.

Zen kept massaging your feet until he noticed that you fell asleep.

Putting a blanket over your body, he kissed your nose and laid down next to you. ,,I love you just the way you are and I will love you no matter how you look in the future,’’

Yoosung

You were almost twelve weeks pregnant when your cravings began.

But just as you were craving for odd food, you also began to feel sick, vomiting in the morning and sometimes sleeping the whole morning, waking up for lunch and then sleeping three hours more.

But Yoosung was more than happy to take care of you and so was your mothers.

Ever since you guys told them a few days ago that you were finally expecting, a lot of books about babies arrived at your home.

,,Yoosung boy, I will come for the weekend and do the laundry,’’ his mother told him, not even giving him time to disagree.

You were kind of uncomfortable. You had the feeling that she didn’t believe in you and that you couldn’t handle your chores and a pregnancy, but you soon got to know yourself how comfortable it was. Your body still wasn’t used to the change so you often just felt very sick.

,,It’s not that we don’t think that you can handle it, we just know ourselves how hard it was. I wish my mother would have supported me back then,’’ your mother said as she unpacked the side dishes she prepared for you.

,,And especially because you guys had a hard time, we want to help you. We’re just worried,’’ your mother kept saying, moving you to tears.

,,Thank you, mom. I’m sorry that I got angry,’’ you apologized. ,,Don’t worry, I know that your hormones are driving you crazy,’’ she laughed and kissed your cheek.

,,I will go now, bye baby, bye Yoosung!’’ she called and went on her way.

Yoosung approached you a few minutes later with his phone in his hand as he showed you a pregnancy photo shoot.

,,We could do the same and I saw pictures where they also use the injections as a sign of how much they fought for their baby!’’ he excitedly said, scrolling through it and saving more and more pictures.

,,Yes, as soon as my baby bump gets bigger,’’ you laughed and looked into his phone.

Suddenly, you began to bite on your lips as you observed your husband. ,,Do you think it would be too much to go to McDonalds now and buy a McFlurry with Snickers and Bounty?’’ you asked him.

,,Your mother brought food. Do you crave for ice cream?’’ he asked you, ready to put on his shoes.

,,Yes,’’ you gasped. You were so lucky to have your lovely husband.

The week later, you even woke him up, making him almost have a heart attack, thinking you felt unwell.

But you just wanted to have something odd to eat. He couldn’t really understand your wish since he was way too sleepy.

He just remembered coming back with a plate and you crying because you changed your mind and asked him to not kick you out.

But he was actually happy that you still didn’t crave for something odd to eat… for now at least….

Jaehee

Four weeks passed ever since Christmas and ever since you told Jaehee that you were pregnant after the very long fight the both of you had to go through.

After you told her, she thought that the hard fight was finally over.

But she was wrong. The fight wasn’t over yet.

,,I will now call the doctor,’’ Jaehee whispered and put her hand on your head, checking if your fever was still high.

,,Thanks, huh,’’ you caught and held your head between your both hands, adding some pressure on your temples, hoping that the pain wouldn’t be as strong as it was.

Jaehee was worried as your flu was so bad. You weren’t even allowed to take some medicine, making everything even worse.

,,Drink some hot tea. I will go and call someone,’’ she whispered and handed you the cup of tea.

The shop was closed for today.

She never thought that when you whined in the middle of the night, you were in pain or that you were actually sick.

And when you didn’t respond to her calling in the morning, she was about to freak out.

A few seconds later, Jaehee came back. She sat on her side of the bed and held your hand as she stroked your palm.

Your hands were so cold, even though the room was really hot.

,,Don’t worry so much,’’ you whispered and coughed again. This time your arms were too slow to hold your temples together.

Jaehee smiled as she observed you. ,,How can I stay calm if you’re like this? I mean, you’re not like Zen,’’ she tried to joke.

You also smiled, but your eyes slowly closed as you tried to open them again.

,,If you feel sleepy, just sleep,’’ she whispered, coming closer to your ear.

Indeed, you fell asleep.

For you it seemed like seconds, however, you woke up three hours later.

,,What did he say?’’ you groaned in pain, opening your eyes to look up to Jaehee.

,,It’s okay. Your fever went down a bit when he came and it didn’t even reach 38 degrees. It should stay that low, but you are allowed to take this medicine,’’ she mumbled and gave you a pill and some water, something you gladly took.

And luckily, a few days later you felt better. You still felt weak, but this was also because of your pregnancy.

But Jaehee didn’t allow you to wear anything else than a warm scarf, long clothes, and a jacket, even at home.

She wanted to stay ready for everything.

And the next time the both of you visited the doctor and were told that everything was fine, she also surprised you with the gender of your baby…

,,A boy between two women. He will be more than spoiled,’’ you laughed as Jaehee and you looked up to the screen where your baby was pictured on.

Saeyoung

You were currently 34 weeks pregnant and 23 weeks had passed since the doctor told the both of you that you were pregnant with twins, making Saeyoung the most emotional dad in the whole building.

,,I hope they will both have your hair color,’’ you said happily back then as you left.

Saeyoung could just smile at the thought of becoming a dad of two children at one time.

Not even Saeran could believe that his brother's DNA was so… strong.

Actually, that day, even some fears came over Saeyoung. ,,Saeran is right. Our DNA is so strong,’’ he mumbled. At first you thought he was joking and told him that you were hoping that they wouldn’t become hackers like him, but you soon realized that Saeyoung was worried about something totally different.

,,What if I become like my mother or my father? What if they become like them? How can I prevent history if my DNA-’’

,,Saeyoung,’’ you quickly calmed him down, placing a hand on your belly.

,,These two babies also have my DNA,’’ you said, making him laugh.

,,Besides,’’ you went on, ,,we will both become parents. We will have the responsibility to teach them that some things are wrong and if we both can do this, they will be just fine,’’ you told him and ever since, his fears completely vanished.

The pregnancy was rather easy. You didn’t have the urge to vomit anymore, just the mood swings were driving the two men crazy and the cravings, well, luckily Saeyoung never had a good sleep schedule.

Today you laid down on your couch. Saeyoung and Saeran did almost everything in the household since you were way too huge and were way too sleepy after you did the smallest thing, something both of them gladly did for you.

You were poking on your belly when suddenly, a little foot appeared from the inside, pressing on your belly.

You quickly took out your phone to take a picture and decided to open a chatroom.

Not even a few seconds later, Saeran and Saeyoung left the chatroom to feel the wonder by themselves while the chat was going crazy. They were all so hyped for the baby that Yoosung sent you guys packages every second day as a present.

,,Hello Baby Girl Nr. 1!’’ Saeyoung quickly said as he placed his hand on the foot.

You chuckled as you poked the other side of your belly. Now a little hand appeared, making Saeran place his palm on your bare skin.

,,Did you ask?’’ Saeyoung teased him, making his twin look unsure if this was inappropriate.

But you just smiled and patted his hand. ,,It’s okay, you don’t need to ask. He’s just teasing you.’’

A few minutes passed until you noticed that Saeyoung’s tears were actually dripping on your skin.

,,What’s wrong?’’ you asked, now crying too.

,,I’m just… I will be a dad soon! Why are you crying?! Are you in pain?’’ he sobbed, worriedly.

,,No, I’m crying because you were crying. I- I’m pregnant, I cry the whole time!’’ you sobbed.

But by now, even Saeran began to cry with you guys, but tears of joy. Your family was growing after all.

Saeran

Slowly but surely, you were approaching your 14th week of pregnancy.

Every moment of those past weeks were wonderful for you. You enjoyed Saeran‘s love, the feeling of a child growing into you, and you felt the best.

The best was that Saeran was sure that soon enough he would finally find his brother. Saeyoung, the member of the RFA you all missed among yourselves, leaving Saeran to work even harder.

But his task wasn’t just to search for his brother, he also worked with Jumin and led the new team the young CEO-in-line formed.

Sometimes, Saeran had to leave early in the morning and wouldn’t come back until late in the evening.

Of course you missed him, his voice, his hands on your skin, the touch of his fingers, and the sight filled with love as he prepared the nursery with you.

But it was okay. It was for the family‘s sake after all.

The day passed and once again, you ate your dinner alone, your phone in your left hand and the sticks in your right, eating the rice you prepared.

Suddenly the door opened, making you almost jump up in happiness.

Smiling, you walked over to Saeran who seemed very very sleepy, you noticed, but you were way too hyped and glad to have him by your side.

,,Hey! Are you hungry? Thirsty? Wanna eat? Shower?“ you asked him, following Saeran like a puppy as he took off his shoes and walked towards his own room. the dusty room he was living in whenever he thought he almost found his brother.

But without a response he closed the door, leaving you hurt and disappointed.

,,It’s okay,“ you mumbled, tears streaming down your cheeks.

,,He has a lot on his mind. Let’s not bug him,“ you hiccuped and put the rice away, not feeling hungry anymore.

Moments passed as you sat alone in the living room with silence around you.

You hoped that Saeran would come out and at least say, ,,Hello“ but nothing. He apparently didn’t even have to pee.

Sleepy and weak, you decided to go to sleep instead, just to feel an odd tightening feeling in your belly.

A bad cramp followed, making you sit back down.

You gasped for air as you leaned forward.

,,Saeran…?“ you whimpered.

Pain. You felt pure pain, followed by fear for your baby.

,,Saeran?“ you called louder, your voice lowering with every letter of his name because of the tears.

Just when you lastly found the strength to throw the remote against the wall, you heard Saeran‘s chair and the door getting opened.

,,Mc, I’m working, what are you-” seeing your teary face made him frown.

Seeing that you seemed to be in pain, however, made him panic.

The baby he was working for such a long time, the baby he wanted to protect, he promised to protect, he was neglecting it. And not just the baby, but you too.

Everything went by quickly afterwards. He held your hand the whole time while he called the ambulance, the whole drive to the hospital, and the last moment until you were brought away from him.

His head was already filled with every possible thought, but this was the top priority.

And his facial expression could just relax when the doctor opened the door, begged him inside, and happily announced that you were pregnant with twins and healthy.

Jihyun

,,I was sure that we would get a girl,“ you laughed as you came back from the doctor.

At the last two appointments, the doctor told you that your baby apparently didn’t want to show you it’s sex, making you think that it was a shy girl you were carrying.

,,Are you disappointed?“ Jihyun asked you, holding your hand in his.

You shook your head, smiling at him brightly.

,,No, ,I don't mind. I just thought I was having a motherly instinct, but I guess I was wrong,’’ you laughed, your other hand over his as you looked straight forward again, passing a baby shop just to stop again and look.

,,Do you want to buy something?’’ he softly asked you as his eyes followed you, looking at the little white crib you were staring at.

,,Just a bit, maybe?’’ you asked him with a tiny voice and he immediately agreed.

Well, the little bit of buying something quickly transformed into ordering a stroller and buying a crib, some clothes, and little toys your baby could use in the future.

You mostly had blue things, but you also bought other baby clothes, mostly animals themed.

Packed with things, Jihyun couldn’t hold your hand anymore, but he made sure that you stayed by his side as he carried the things he could hold with his own two hands.

As soon as you arrived at home, you however, needed to lay down or at least put your legs up since your legs were throbbing in pain. It was as if there was an odd tension around your feet.

,,Put them up,’’ Jihyun said and kissed your head.

,,But I want to help you with the nursery,’’ you whined, seeing that the colors you guys ordered already arrived to make the babies room.

,,I will paint the walls. You’re not allowed to smell and inhale it anyways. Besides, I want to surprise you,’’ he told you honestly and tried to adjust the pillow so that your back was at ease.

As soon as your head felt the softness of the pillow and the couch, your eyes fell closed, your breathing calmed down, and you seemed to have fallen asleep, something your husband liked as he knew that you needed the sleep.

You just woke up when Lucy came back from school, realizing that the whole afternoon passed by now.

,,How was your day?’’ you asked her with a sleepy smile as you hugged her, feeling the need for her love right now.

,,Good. I had fun and learned and understood a lot… but where is Father?’’ Lucy asked you, making you shrug with your shoulders and get up to search for your husband.

You gasped as you entered the cold nursery as the windows were opened. Jihyun was in the middle of the room, smiling as soon as he saw that you stepped in.

,,Woah, did you do all this?’’ Lucy gasped.

The wall was painted in a light gray, in the foreground a few palm trees in a light green, the background filled with more palm trees, but in a darker grey tone.

An elephant was in the middle of the wall and over it a big bird. To you it looked like a parrot, but you knew that it was an exotic bird.

On the left wall, a big light yellow colored giraffe was drawn on the wall and you could just imagine how much love, passion, and thought Jihyun put into that one wall.

,,I can picture every little detail of this room,’’ you said, feeling very emotional.

,,You like it?’’ he asked you.

,,I can’t believe you did this all in these few hours!’’ you laughed and hugged him, Lucy between you as you imagined your little family in a few months in this same room.

Vanderwood

Many weeks passed ever since you told Vanderwood a day before his birthday that you were expecting a child and a few weeks passed.

You both agreed on still waiting with buying things like clothes and toys since you were planning on moving out.

To be honest, you both would move out in just a few days since you finally found the home you were willing to raise your family in.

It was a wonderful house with a big garden, a wonderful kitchen with enough room to eat together, three rooms for future children which were planned to be used in another way at the moment, three bathrooms and a master room as well as a big, wonderful living room.

You could already picture your little perfect family in front of a big christmas tree.

,,Mc?’’ Jaehee called while carrying a box.

,,Let me help you, Jaehee,’’ you said as she looked at you in surprise.

,,No, Mc, you are 24 weeks pregnant! You can’t work hard!’’ she exclaimed.

,,I just wanted to make sure that you were okay!’’ she smiled, putting the box in a corner.

The RFA was currently helping the both of you with packing things since they all understood that you weren’t able to help much in order to protect the unborn child.

Instead, your task was to put things together and tell them where to put the boxes.

Vanderwood joined as he looked at you. ,,Are you okay?’’ he asked you worriedly, putting away the thing he was currently carrying to stroke your back.

,,Ye-yes!’’ you hissed, not meaning it in a bad way.

,,See, I can carry this!’’ you told him loudly and bent down to take a light box.

However, you took the box with way too much swing and fell backwards, stumbling on your feet and landing on the hard cold floor on your butt.

The box was still in your hands as you laid there, baffled as you blinked a few times.

,,MC?!’’ Vanderwood yelled and immediately went on his knees to brush away a stand of hair and look at your face.

,,Oi, are you okay?’’ he repeated.

You didn’t feel any pain at the moment. You had the feeling that you were okay, but somehow… somehow you just began to tear up.

You were scared and panicking, your heart was racing and you just started crying, making Vanderwood’s hands shake in fear.

,,Ya, don’t do this!’’ he whined and patted your back, looking helplessly to Jaehee, who already had her phone pressed against her ear, having a phone call with the paramedics.

It didn’t take long until the other members gathered around you, looking pitifully at your scared face as they waited for the help.

Waiting in the hospital was almost killing Vanderwood. He walked up and down, saw how nurses rushed past him, how other patients were brought in different rooms, how family members waited around him for their loved ones, and how the RFA slowly felt more the pressure around you.

Suddenly you appeared in front of him. A big smile was on your lips and at least one burden was taken off of Vanderwood.

He felt as if his knees were soft as he saw that you were alright, a new sonogram in your hand.

,,It’s a girl! We can buy pink wall color!’’ you laughed.

,,Gosh, you don’t know how happy I am. I mean, you’re okay,’’ he began to whisper.

,,And, this little… girl is well,’’ he said, placing his hand on your belly.

,,I know… we wanted to be surprised and didn’t want to know the gender, but the doctor just blurted it out and I -’’

,,It’s okay,’’ he smiled and hugged you.

,,It’s okay. I’m happy. I’m so happy.’’

Part 4.2 of my pregnancy series

MASTERLIST 1

MASTERLIST 2

MASTERLIST 3

🤰🏻ᴘʀᴇɢɴᴀɴᴄʏ sᴇʀɪᴇs🤰🏻Masterlist here

16.05.2021// 00:12 MEST

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debbiebeary · 4 years ago

Text

Disgust and Ecstacey

Hayden’s belly jiggled and wobbled violently in the dim, hippy light of the room. The combination of the incense and marijuana haze made the doughy expanse of his body appear even softer and more rounded. The curtains were slightly drawn and in the light was a smoky beam, the rest of the room was lit by red string lights and a few kitschy lamps.

In Hayden’s chunky arms, arms with those beautiful biceps that mushed up against his moobs into a cellulity pillow, he carried Ben and Jerries, peanut butter sandwiches, and some bananas (hey, digestion is important, ok?)

“Alright little britches” said Hayden, time to get to three hundred!” He said as his uncovered belly, lightly shined with sweat, surged forward even more as he added to the snacks already present on the table (chocolate, korean fried chicken and potato chips).

Dillon laughed.

“Oh come on I only reached two fifty yesterday!”

“Only two fifty!?” Cried a voice from across the swirling aromatic haze.

“Only two fifty?!” He repeated, standing up and revealing his own two hundred seventy pound form, he put his meaty paws onto his lightly dark furred, pear shaped body and gave it a strong jiggle, “That’s forty pounds since you arrived, it’s only been a month and a half! If you keep it up you’ll be bigger than me!”

Dillon looked down at his stretchmark covered gut and heaving moobs, which themselves had stretchmarks emerging near the armpits and also stretchmarks on his biceps too. His growth surely exceeded his own expectations. And it didn’t help that Garry, whom was the coffee shops resident chaser turned chub himself, was always feeding Dillon super creamy specialty coffees free of charge throughout his shift.

“Yeah. Who knows,” he began, a smug grin forming between his fattening cheeks and burgeoning double chin, both beginning to dominate his features even under his thickening beard, “perhaps I will hit three hundred.”

“Well it isn’t a matter of ‘if’, it’s a matter of ‘when’. And either way,” Hayden paused to toke the joint he just lit, stifling a cough before he continued, “either way, you gotta eat to make that happen, pig.” And without warning he took a peanut butter sandwich and crammed into an unsuspecting Dillon’s fattening maw. Garry wore a lascivious smirk on his face as he yet again watched Hayden work his gluttonous magic on Dillon.

“Remember!” the three hundred fifty pound blonde stud mumbled after tearing a massive chunk out of his own sandwich, “we match each other bite for bite, no matter what” he continued, swallowing the mouthful into his growling, churning tank, giving it an emphatic slap.

Dillon chewed and swallowed his own mouthful,

“Yes big bear-“

But he was interrupted by Hayden once again plugging his airways with the second half of the sandwich.

Dillon could feel the scale shattering beneath his feet already.

Again and again, handfuls of chocolate brownies, of chips, fried chicken (with an inspired melted Velveeta American cheese dip) were shoved into the awaiting Dillon's mouth by the bronze skinned, blonde haired hunky blob. Though Garry was the bottom, Hayden, a versatile boy who when he was a top, was a very dominant top. This extended to feeding.

Though Hayden was attracted to Dillon, he found force feeding him aggressively to be somehow even more… penetrating. More satisfying than the thought of fucking him ever could be. He was morphing Dillon’s body, potentially towards a permanent absolution. He may never go back to the way he was before the summer began.

Dillon could see the twisted thrill in Hayden’s eyes as he crammed in handful after handful and despite the overstuffed pain in his abdomen he kept opening his mouth, begging again and again for the ruin of his once athletic form.

Hayden had heard tales of the pretentious condescension of Brian. Of his prideful taste in skinny boys, his carbon-copied preferences. In this a dark desire lay, one in which to sever Dillon from his obnoxious fuckbuddy. All he would need were calories and time.

Of which he incidentally had both.

“Damn Hayden, you’re turning him into a blimp!”

“Bwaaap!” Was Hayden’s guttural reply, “ugh, fuck. S’cuse me! Turning myself into a blimp while I’m at it too, don’t ya think Gerry boy?”

Gerry was too busy drooling at them both with big horny puppy eyes to respond, but Hayden’s smile curled with smug deviousness.

Eventually the snacks dwindled until nothing was left and Dillon's already stretchmark laden gut was now bright red and itchy with swelling.

Hayden smacked Dillon’s belly, causing him to wince,

“Fuck!”

“Sorry fatboy, couldn’t help myself, you look like you got a full litter in there.”

“Yeah. A hundred food babies in one. Feel like imma puke.”

Hayden snatched a lit joint that Gerry was enjoying and popped it in Dillon’s mouth, Dillon sucked in frantically,

“Make yourself useful, Gerry. Rub his belly with some of that CBD/tiger balm concoction I made, can’t have him purging all these beautiful calories now can we?”

“N-no sir!” Said Gerry, Gerry always turned into a bitch when Hayden threw his weight around.

“Good boy. Alright Dillon, just hold tight,”

“Uuuuhh. Ok. No I can have that last drumstick then we’re done, I’d rather get this over with and just have some cuddles after.”

“Yeah alright, big dude.”

Hayden let Dillon sink his teeth into the glistening red drumstick, courtesy of the local fried chicken restaurant, Han Ten, Han for the name of the chubby korean bear who owned the pace, ten for ten different glazes. Toasted Perilla, butter honey, spicy, lemon, sweet and sour etcetera. They even had a Ghanaian spicy peanut butter based sauce that was a real zinger. But the one they had was the hybrid honey butter/gochujang ketchup, the K-Supreme with American Cheese Dip, toasted garlic chips and green onions to finish, Dillon’s favourite thing in the world besides Hayden’s succulent puckered-in belly button.

Dillon, after finishing the last bite, let out a rather meaty burp and panted out:

“That’s it, all done…” struggling to breathe, “but it isn’t as bad as last time, uuurap, I’m feeling waaay less sick now, Hayden?”

Hayden was in the kitchen, the fridge door shining it’s menacing white light upon Hayden’s summer- bronzed, food-speckled gut. When Hayden caught Dillon's eye reflected in it was his own evil scheming.

From the glowing gainers bastion of the fridge, like an amulet or treasure of untold power, Hayden withdrew a gallon of chocolate milk.

“Uurp! Fuck, no Hayden that’s pushing it too far! There is no way, mmmlf!”

“Hahaha, you like this funnel? Just got it,” but Dillon managed to spit it out

“Hayden no! Even splitting it it’s way too much for me! I’m too packed!”

Hayden’s face took on a demonic appearance as, with the sun now fully set, the red lights stretched the shadows across his face into l demented forms.

“Whoah, shit this is strong weed.” Dillon suddenly remarked,

“Yeah I cut it with a bit of salvia too, gives everything a nice… twinkle.”

“Well I’m not sure ooouhf!” Hayden shoved the tube back into Dillon's mouth,

“You didn’t let me finish… I’m not splitting this with you, you’re taking ALL OF IT!”

“Whoah, Hayden! You sure? He seems pretty full.”

“He’ll be fine once you get your lips wrapped around his cock, Garry.”

Garry grew quiet.

“RIGHT GERRY!?!”

“Yes sir…”

“Good boy… ok Dillon, open up your throat and GUZZLE! Garry. Uh. Do the same.”

As Garry face planted Dillon’s dick, Dillon was reinvigorated and began to suck down the sweet chocolaty goodness. Garry was a master, sucking Dillon’s meaty head, flicking his slit with his tongue, and deepthroating him like a pro, he never let Dillon get used to his w and was building up to a climax rapidly.

“Yeah you fat fuck, we keep this up you’ll be 400 in no time.”

Dillon moaned. The Gallon was now only half.

“Come on tubbs, you know you want it, you want to beach yourself on the couch and eat and smoke and drink until you’re nothing but a big fat whale.” The gallon was empty but still Dillon sucked on the tube.

“Greedy pig. You still want more?”

withdrawing the tube from Dillon’s mouth, his tortured stomach released a torrent of pressure as Dillon sprayed out a fat wet belch which rolled across the hazy apartment like thunder.

“UUURRRRP!”

In the same moment Hayden, smirking demonically, leaned down and pinched Dillon’s nipple, Dillon convulsed and shot his load, hosing down Garry’s throat with his seed.

“FUUUUCK!” He screamed in agonizing pleasure.

Garry nearly choked on Dillon’s load.

“Holy fuck. Looks like Dillon isn’t the only one that sucked down a gallon of sweet nectar, eh Garry?”

Garry let out a burp of his own before responding.

“I’d say it’s rather more savory but yeah. Basically.”

“Come on, help this fat fuck up, I wanna weigh him.”

“Urrp, fuck guys won’t you give me a second?”

“No fucking way, I wanna see the damage we did, let’s go tubbs!”

After laboring them to the bathroom, they made him stand unaided, swaying dizzily under his own strength after a few minutes of assistance, finally the scale read out its deliberation.

Hayden screamed in disbelief:

“FUCK ME! Two sixty five!?!”

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evakuality · 4 years ago

Photo

Matteo - Episode three

Social Media - There’s so much of it this week! At the time, I only followed a couple of accounts and then only saw the rest when it was posted to the tag. I think I’m grateful for that. This is absolutely overwhelming, the sheer volume of things the characters were putting out. But it’s also really nice that we get all this normal teenage life stuff. It really does allow an immersive ‘this is real people doing real stuff’ feeling to everything. Particularly people like Kiki and Sam who have little to do with the plot. It keeps them real and alive through a season where they were a bit more sidelined (and I love that Matteo and David’s little trip later on keeps them alive in a way that doesn’t overpower Amira’s season - this is a really clever way for the producers to keep fan favourites active without having to shoehorn them into places where they don’t belong). I am also a bit concerned about some of this though - how on earth did the boys not get in trouble for filming the dancing girls and posting it to social media? At most schools I know that would have resulted in some serious discipline action. However, the most fascinating thing about the social media is the party at the end of the episode. Sara didn’t start posting much on her stuff until much later in the evening (the reason this post is so late is because I was waiting to watch through all the social media before I worked with it - and there was so much for so long that I was able to notice the patterns in it in a way I didn’t at the time) and then Leonie took over and it was interesting what she chose to show and how non-perfect it all was compared to what Sara was trying to do before she got really incapacitated. I know it’s not technically part of this episode but the text string between the two of them the next day where Sara panics over how Matteo might take seeing her in such a sloppy drunken state is very telling. She really really wants to put on a show to make sure he’s not turned off by her not being ‘perfect’ - again, this is all very subtly done but there’s a really strong push to show how much of what is put onto social media isn’t a real and true depiction of who we really are. And of course that’s most important for Matteo himself. He’s still very actively putting on a front and it’s only partly to try to cover for the fact that he’s interested in boys not girls. He’s really not happy or at ease with pretty much any aspect of himself, but he’s also not really willing to show it to anyone. Except David. Which we’ll see as we go through the clips.

Clip one - Matteo’s shelf in the fridge is so sad! Someone (a parent maybe?) should really be making sure he has food and is looking after himself. We touched a bit last episode on food and nurturing and what we see here is Matteo very much not nurturing himself. Even more so than Sara, he has no care for his own wellbeing. Also he’s relying heavily on other people (Hans in this case) to do the heavy lifting for him. It’s also a major contrast to the playful, if disgusting, sandwich he made with David. Here it’s really just about putting something in to his body and there’s no thought for anything other than basic survival. Which is, tbh, a good metaphor for Matteo’s approach to his life at this time. The chat with Mia again veers close to things that are difficult for Matteo - he’s wearing David’s beanie, trying to get that bit of closeness to him, but then Mia starts asking awkward questions about why the kitchen was so terrible and what Matteo was up to and it’s all a bit tough. Matteo tries again to deflect and lie to cover his tracks. Which... is he ever going to learn? This lying is forever getting him in hot water when he’s caught out. Jonas even calls him out on it, basically saying ‘if you’re going to use me as an excuse then give me a heads up first’ showing that he has Matteo’s back, but is incapable of helping him if he won’t help himself. At this point, of course, Matteo has closed off because there’s a lot he finds too hard to talk about but Jonas is already giving those hints that he’d be there for Matteo if only Matteo would let him be. But at least Mia’s pushing serves one purpose - Matteo makes contact with David again and they manage to connect and get over the little hitch that David’s ditching caused. Both are still hiding bits of themselves from each other (David more so obviously), but both are quite happy to make these connections and are comfortable with each other. That David responds is so nice; it sets up the dynamic so different to the original and Matteo is much more secure in David’s friendship than Isak was with Even at this point just because of this. Then of course Matteo does the gay test, and it’s clear he already knows but he’s just sort of trying to work through some things. It leads to some of the things he says later that are quite unfortunate (both to the boys about the dance teacher in this episode and to Hans later about the ways to be gay), but I think there’s a genuine desire to figure out what gay might look like rather than any truly homophobic stuff. societal expectations and stereotypes and our own internal biases mess with us big time!!

Clip two - There’s not a lot of difference with the dancing girls clip, but it’s nice to see David again and the interactions between him and Matteo are a lot more natural than with Isak and Even. I guess because these two are in the same year, it’s much easier to pass off knowing each other and so Matteo really is a lot more casual than Isak ever was. The tone of the ‘why does he have to be so gay’ is different here too - Matteo’s much more low key and subdued when he’s called out on ‘why do we insult gays’ and he’s apologising fairly quickly. It really is much more obvious that he’s trying to work out what ‘gay’ is than trying to distance himself from the idea of being gay. He has a lot of issues and a lot of stuff to work through but it’s entrenched in an entirely different way to the og even though the words are almost exactly the same. The power of acting and body language!! Of course, this makes sense for both characters too - Isak and Matteo have different experiences and different lives and so they each act in a way that makes sense for them. I’m super impressed that the same conversation can look so different - both actors are very very good.

Clip three - This scene with Matteo and Sara works much better for me than the one with Isak and Emma. But perhaps that’s because Sara is allowed to be much more of a rounded character rather than a plot device. We can say all we like (and Leonie is so clearly right there with us) that Sara needs to wake up and see how badly Matteo is treating her, but the way this is developing makes it clear why she thinks and acts the way she does and we can have a lot of sympathy for her even while rolling our eyes at how obviously this is not working out. This right here is the moment where Matteo really should have said ‘yeah sorry, this isn’t working for me’ but he chooses not to because he still wants that security of having ‘someone’ if the thing with David turns out the way he expects it to (eg, David and Leonie being a thing). He wants the ability to hide and say ‘see, there was nothing there, I have a girlfriend so I’m not at all upset that David has one too’ and it’s shitty behaviour and it’s totally unfair to Sara, but at this point Matteo can’t see beyond his own needs. Sara is very clearly not happy with the situation and she rightly feels sidelined and unappreciated but she is still willing to accept his word when she puts those words into his mouth. She’s still invested in this fantasy in her head and she is carefully scripting it so that it goes the way she wants it to. Like last week when she was talking over Matteo to avoid hearing anything he’s saying, here she’s literally telling him what to say to get the outcome she wants. Leonie has quite obviously got a better handle on the situation, but Sara doesn’t want to hear it. Sara, again bless her, is very open about what she wants and needs from a relationship and how she’s feeling. She refuses to take Matteo’s very half-hearted attempt at sweet talking her at face value and demands some accountability. But it’s the very nature of those demands that sets her doom. She tells him what she needs and he gives it to her - only it’s a very pale and weak imitation of what she would really like. He uses her communication skills to play her.

Clip four - I loathe how no-one takes Matteo’s wants and needs into account, pretty much ever. He’s in such a rut of being used to just going with the flow that even when he tries to assert his own wants people straight up ignore him. It’s sad that he allows Kiki etc to basically commandeer his home for their party but it’s very much in keeping with how everything else is going. Last week, Kiki was super irritated because she had a picture of how things were going to go (they would have their event and Matteo would host it) and she couldn’t deal with things not being under her control. I suspect that if Sara hadn’t been with them and hadn’t done the speaking for Matteo, he would have been bullied into doing what she wanted then too. He clearly doesn't want to do this , but at least he uses it as a way to get closer to David. ‘Well, this party idea sucks, but maybe I can get this guy I like there’ and so he goes right up to him and invites him. While he’s quite checked out of significant parts of his life, when Matteo really wants something he’s not scared of going after it. Of course, as we see in later events, this gets him in trouble at times. But for right now it’s nice to see him taking some small control of his life. This is only possible, of course, because he was able to connect with David fairly quickly after he left last week. The fact that they are able to do this is testament to how easily they do understand each other and even while its awkward, this relationship doesn’t have the underlying tensions that the one with Sara does. It’s awkward in a positive way.

Clip five - there’s lots going on in this one. The studying and how little interest and engagement Matteo has with it. The consequent stalking of David on Sara’s account, the flow over into looking for David’s favourite movie, and of course Hans and his intrusion into Matteo’s quiet space again and then his attempt at using grindr. It’s a slow, fairly quiet clip and yet Matteo ends up doing a lot in it. It shows again, I think, just how much he values his time by himself and how much it works for him to be allowed to do things at his own pace. I’ve said before I really enjoy seeing the characters in their own environments being chill and just hanging with themselves. It shows us a lot of how they are. In this case, Matteo moves very quickly from the boredom of the studying to things he has more interest in. Like David. He’s restless and disengaged, using all of his tricks to try to distract himself (playing with plants etc) and then very quickly giving up on what he should do. I like that we get these sorts of smaller, lower key indications of how much David means to him as well. It’s not big grandiose expressions of interest, but he watches the movie because David likes it. He can’t even let himself stare at the picture for too long because it feels like a huge admission (he literally breaks eye contact with it and looks away the way he often does with David himself). It’s in these unguarded moments in his own space that we really see Matteo and he’s a mess, but he’s a mess who really does want connection and to find meaning with someone.

Clip six - We all love this one, right? It’s such a nice moment with David and their almost-kissing is very intense. But there’s a lot going on before that that I also want to look at. First, the way the boys call Matteo a ‘player’?????? how???? That’s his girlfriend????? He is playing her and stringing her along when he shouldn’t, but he’s not playing the field which is generally what we mean when we say this sort of thing. He has one girl and that one girl has made it pretty clear that he is hers. In many ways Matteo would be better off if he was playing the field - then there’s no expectations and he gets a rep as a ladies man. But this works better for him - he can sort of fall into it and follow along with it without having to put any effort in at all. She literally speaks for him, even. I have always found it fascinating how much Matteo keeps to himself in this clip. He hugs the walls like they’re his home and Sara is out there in the middle and there’s such a disconnect between the way they’re both acting. How would Matteo have coped with the expectations Sara outlines about sex had she not got so blind drunk she had to be taken home? It seems like it would have led to something very awkward and maybe she’d have finally got the picture.

Laura's little visit to see Matteo is cute too. Obviously she knows that David is interested and so she checks him out. It’s a shame it’s interrupted by Hans who then monopolises Matteo, but she was quite deliberate in finding him and speaking with him and I love the sibling support. David’s shirt he chooses to appeal to Matteo is hilarious too. The thought process (and the discussions with Laura at home beforehand) must have been brilliant. ‘I always wear black and am mysterious and aloof and cool, but to attract this boy I will wear a white shirt with a stupid picture on it’ - that it does attract Matteo just shows how attuned David is to his future boyfriend. Maybe he’s stalking the instagrams too - the Matteo Monday and Florenzi Friday do suggest that this is something that might appeal to Matteo.

Hans and Andi bother me too. In much the same way that I dislike that Sara assumes that Matteo not wanting sex with her means he’s gay (like? It’s okay not to want sex!! It doesn’t say anything about your sexuality), I don’t like that Hans has talked about Matteo to Andi and allows him to be so forward and aggressively sexual with someone who is very obviously not willing to be out. I know Hans is trying to be there for Matteo and to encourage him to accept himself (I think it’s pretty clear that he knows or thinks Matteo likes guys). But this is a party with all of Matteo’s friends. What did they think would happen? Why did they think he’d react in any way other than the one he does? Hans looks confused when Matteo pushes away and leaves, but why? This behaviour is entirely consistent with everything we know of his character. That it ends in an actual panic attack makes it all much more sad and difficult to watch. Honestly, outing people when they’re not ready is not cool and Hans should know this.

The panic attack itself is so well done. There’s no dialogue and yet we can see very obviously how Matteo is feeling and just how ‘normal’ this is to him. He has a set of behaviours that he follows to try to take the edge off. He throws things (this is his go-to when he’s stressed and he does it a LOT), he tries weed and he finally tries music and sitting by himself, cuddling a cushion for comfort. I know a million people have discussed this at length, but I don’t think we can speak about this clip without at least touching on it. Everything about it is done so well and it all combines to allow Matteo’s feelings to shine through. I love that it’s allowed to happen at a party and that we see very clearly how these things can be overwhelming for characters. I won’t go on anymore, but it’s just great and the acting is so perfect. I genuinely think this small part of this clip is probably my favourite acting out of everything in this show.

And then of course we have the stuff after everyone else has left. Again, a million people have discussed this in a million ways, but I love how this scene again shows how easily they get each other, how good they are at communicating with each other and how quickly they get on the same page. Matteo has no trouble at all saying what he thinks and pressing for information. This parallels Sara in some ways - she is like this with Matteo, making her wants and needs clear and putting herself on the line. Again, this is all very good set up for later on when Matteo finally finds himself in her position and realises just how much his behaviour hurt her because he’s living her side. However, unlike Matteo, David is quite clear and honest back. And that’s why they can so quickly move into a potential kiss. As with Matteo and Sara, there are close ups as they lean into each other, but somehow it feels like there’s more space for them to breathe here. The camera allows them both to be in the frame naturally, whether Sara is often invading into Matteo’s shots. Here, they’re both on board and both want it. I like that Matteo gets a moment to be open and himself after his experience with Andi. It must take a lot of courage to do this after he was so badly affected earlier. Testament to David’s calming presence which reassures rather than pushes, and how honest they are with each other - there’s no way David could miss how relieved Matteo is when he finds out that Laura is David’s sister not his girlfriend. They’re both very brave here - David for telling Matteo he looks good and Matteo for trying to take that next step even after his panic attack. And I think that’s a nice place to leave this. Because that’s already such a lot and this has all already been said before.

#druck #og druck #Matteo - episode 3 #again super long I'm sorry #one day I'll learn how to be concise

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stay-mon-army · 4 years ago

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Lazy Day In

Warnings: None

Word count: 1,362 words

Pairing: Hyungwon x gender neutral!reader

Even before Covid-19, you were no stranger to locking yourself away in your apartment for extended periods of time— ignoring the world outside except to order takeout. Having a boyfriend like Hyungwon kept you well-acquainted with that lifestyle. Hyungwon wasn't lazy, he just preferred simpler comforts when his life was usually so hectic. You couldn't blame him, really. After a long week of work and chores and errands, curling up in bed with good food, a nice drama, and a snuggly boyfriend (or plushie, if former is unavailable) sounded like absolute heaven. However sometimes you liked to plan real dates with Hyungwon when you both had time. You had planned this nice long day out— with shopping and a picnic in the park and a nice dinner at a quiet family run restaurant you had been dying to try.

That didn't seem like it was going to happen, however. Hyungwon had come over after his practice last night, utterly exhausted and quickly ushering you to your bed for cuddles. He'd fallen asleep almost as soon as his head hit the pillow, his arms still tight around you while his face went totally slack. You would've snapped a sneaky, cringey picture of his agape mouth, but you were so comfortable and you didn't want to risk stirring his clearly comfortable slumber— plus, you had a million such photos (he was sleeping often at your place). Instead you simply closed your eyes, snuggling closer, and fell asleep.

You had set an alarm for 10am, not wanting to get up too early since you both deserved the rest, but you also wanted the day to go well so you couldn't sleep in too late. As your alarm screamed at you, Hyungwon groaned loud, not happy with the disruption of his sleep. If you weren't also utterly exhausted, you might have laughed at his overreaction as he twists away from the sound, pulling his pillow over his head.

You turned off the alarm and started to slide out of bed, but Hyungwon wasn't having that. His arm shot out from under the comforter to circle your waist, tugging you back against him.

"Wonnie, we have to get up. I have plans for us today." He shakes his head into the pillow before turning to curl his long body around you. A soft laugh falls from your lips as his face presses into your neck, him releasing puffs of air that tickles your skin. "I'm serious, Hyungwon. We can't stay in bed all day."

You weren't mad, and in all honesty, you didn't sound serious because your voice was light with the smile gracing your lips. Yes, you wanted to have this day out on your mutual day off, but when Hyungwon for clingy, you also wanted to simply stay in his arms all day long. Regardless, he released you and rolled over, rubbing at his face with the heels of his hands. His hair was wild a top his head, no doubt from him tossing around so much this morning.

You finally manage to slip from between the warm comforter and pad over to your closet to begin picking out your outfit. As you pick out something nice and comfortable for the warm spring day the weather forecasters promised you, you could hear Hyungwon rustling himself out of bed as well. You felt comfortable enough with Hyungwon to begin to get changed in the room. As you tug off your sleep clothes, you can sense Hyungwon behind you. Just before you can turn to face him, he rests his head on your shoulder, his hands softly grazing your hips.

"You're so gorgeous." He presses a kiss to your shoulder before releasing you, reaching around you to grab a shirt and pair of pants. Your cheeks flush as you glance back to watch him disappear into the bathroom. You hear him rustling around and quickly finish dressing yourself.

Once you're finished getting ready, which didn't take long because you were too tired to put too much effort into your look today, you wander into the kitchen. You shuffle around grabbing various items you'd need for your picnic. You put them all into a small picnic basket you had gotten from a family member for your last birthday— you finally had an opportunity to use it. You only packed away foods you knew wouldn't go bad in the time it would take you to get Hyungwon out of the house and to the Han river, where you knew the perfect place to picnic away from prying eyes.

As you placed the last sandwich and ice pack into the basket and shut the top, you heard Hyungwon shuffle his feet into the living room-kitchen doorway.

"Are you ready for a wonderful day out?" You smile, turning to face him, until your smile drops. "What's wrong?" He had a sad look on his face, obviously disappointed about whatever he was about to tell you.

"I just texted my manager to let him know I was going out today with you, and he said that I shouldn't go out. I guess someone got into some scandal and news people are gonna be all over the city all day trying to get their hands on more information, or another scandal to boost their company. I know how excited you were about your plans today and I'm so so sorry that I have to ruin them." He runs a hand through his still messy hair, a pout on his lips as your face drops. You put your hand on the counter, looking away from him towards the picnic basket, all packed and ready to go. "However..."

You glance back at him, head tilting slightly at the sly grin that's slid onto his face.

"How about we do all of those plans here, inside? We can picnic in the living room, and I'll buy you some adorable outfits online, and then we can order food from wherever you want and we can eat it in bed and binge that new drama you were telling me about last week." He slowly enters the kitchen, slipping his arms around your waist as he pulls you against him. "I may not be able to give you that perfect date day, but I can try to recreate your masterpiece indoors." He presses a kiss to your forehead before meeting your eyes with the softest gaze.

"I like that idea a lot, Wonnie. I'm a little sad we can't do my original plan, but it's not your fault. We had no way of knowing some scandal was going to come out today of all days. We can still make the most of it." You smile up at him as he visibly relaxes, obviously happy that you weren't too mad or disappointed in the sudden change of plans. "Help me set up a picnic blanket in the living room?"

"Anything for you, darling." He mumbles as he pecks you on the lips, reaching around you for the picnic blanket before stepping towards the living room.

You grab the basket and follow him, placing it on the coffee table before you grab the other half of the picnic blanket, helping him spread it across the floor as best as you could around the furniture. You place the basket on the blanket before sitting down besides Hyungwon.

"What did you pack us today?" He asks, rubbing his hands together as you laugh at his actions.

While you didn't have the "perfect" date you had planned that day, you wouldn't have complained about a single thing. You enjoyed the day with Hyungwon, getting to joke and enjoy good food with the man you loved. In public, you didn't often get to be your complete quirky selves because you were always aware of the fact that fans or reporters could be around any corner, but in the comfort of your own home, you both could be yourselves with each other. It wasn't as nice as having a day out of course, because it was always nice to explore and change your surroundings, but you were happy anywhere when you had Hyungwon by your side.

#hyungwon imagine #hyungwon imagines #monsta x #monsta x imagine #monsta x imagines #chae hyungwon #hyungwon #chae hyungwon imagine

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bbugyu · 4 years ago

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no song without you + lee seokmin & yoon jeonghan

you truly believed that you were possibly the luckiest person on earth to have earned the attention of two of the most extraordinary men on the planet.

prelude | part one | part two | part three | epilogue

wc.8.4k | architect!jeonghan x musician!seokmin x f musician!reader, fluff, smut, established relationship, polyamory, domestic humor, jeonghan thinks he runs the show but rlly ur both just whipped for seokmin, drinking, threesome, lots o' mlm, soft dom!seok bbratty sub!han switch!reader, toy use, lk cucking again lol, male penetration, sex sandwich, light bondage (it's just a tie), daddy kink, baby boy/baby girl, double switches gang up on their dom and it's the best, unprotected (please use condoms), hi gyu! (not during the sex omg)

hey gang! here is the long awaited epilogue for neverending artistry!! sorry for taking so long to post, but i really appreciate your understanding around the weird hiccups i've had in my personal life lately, and i promise to get back into the swing of writing soon. this mc is such an obvious self insert of myself that it's embarrassing but you know me when it comes to jeonghan! cannot help it!

jeonghan had finally convinced you to ditch your apartment. it took you a while to come around, but it was hard to deny his logic when he argued that your new office had close to the same square footage and you only went there once every week or so to find some specific clothing item you missed. there was some nostalgia there, though - it was your first place you ever got on your own, and you spent most of your university career there, but your emotional attachment dwindled the more time you spent in the newest spaces of jeonghan's home.

when the last of your things were moved, you realized you wouldn't have to pay rent anymore, and accused jeonghan of tricking you for the sake of being frugal.

he laughed, helping you hang clothes in his - your? - closet. "how do you think i got rich in the first place?"

jeonghan couldn't help but be preoccupied with his own passion projects, so he kept turning down most of the new contracts that came across his desk. you joked that he was gonna run out of money eventually, despite knowing that he not only had plenty stowed away somewhere and that he had a good enough name that he could get work whenever he wanted. he just didn't want to yet - he had too many ideas for home. even when he did start taking more contracts again, as the weather warmed and winter became spring, he continued making little changes to the home here and there. you teased him for it, because really, who the hell converts their basement into a theater room for no good reason?

"it is a good reason!" he said defensively, a smile tugging at his offended expression. "you suggested a movie night."

"yeah, a movie night," you argued, recalling when seungkwan casually said that he had never seen lord of the rings and you had gotten personally offended. "not a whole theater room! what kind of rich asshole are you?"

seokmin tsked, sliding a bowl of ramen towards you. "that's on you, really. he's definitely the kind of rich asshole that would have a theater room."

"hey," jeonghan said, leaning heavily against his hands on the kitchen island between you. "can i remind you both who built this entire house? y'know, the one that you get to enjoy for the low, low price of loving me?"

you blinked at him as you blew on a bite of noodles. "when you can't afford me anymore, i'm moving in with seokmin."

his jaw dropped at you, making the younger laugh as you slurped the instant noodles he had made in celebration of you submitting your project on time - which was also the reason you had missed eating dinner with them a few hours earlier. "i'll still love you when you're poor," he assured, rubbing a hand on his back.

"when you can't afford me- pfft," jeonghan, crossed his arms. "when did you become such a prick?"

you quirked your eyebrows at him. "i had a great teacher."

jeonghan barely let out an indignant "yah!" when seokmin laughed and put up his hands, trying to mediate. "okay, can we please have one weekend? just one friday where you two don't get pouty at each other?"

"jeonghan’s fault," you said, pointing. "he takes it too seriously."

"i wouldn't take it so seriously if you didn't have a shitty tone."

you gaped at him, eyes glinting with playfulness. "a shitty tone?"

seokmin sighed, his eyes shutting as he leaned back against a counter. "i asked so nicely."

"yeah, a shitty tone," jeonghan confirmed. "who made you such a spoiled brat?"

you laughed, your voice dipping into a mocking register. "yeah, who? i really wonder."

seokmin's head was lolling to one side, his arms crossed, as he stared at his boyfriend's profile with pitched brows. "did you really just ask who spoiled the person you gave a black card to?"

jeonghan gave him a look of betrayal. "hey, whose side are you on?"

"this time?" he asked, a hand slipping out of his crossed arms to point at you. "hers."

you could never stay mad at each other, even if the argument didn't end right away - you always ended up not being able to stop yourself from laughing at a joke he cracked, making him break his upset façade, and seokmin would let out a relieved sigh and stretch out his limbs, recognizing the telltale signs of the evening winding down. he knew that he was safe from your arguments until the next friday, when the two of you were acting out again only because you missed having him around.

seokmin, without fail, spent every weekend at the house, getting dropped off at his loft by jeonghan on monday mornings before his first lesson. weeknights, too, sometimes, especially when he didn't have lessons too early the next day, and you would usually pack up your school supplies and tag along on the morning after those nights, happily doing homework and writing essays as you listened to his lessons. on one such day, you were curled up in his side after his last client left, burying your face in his neck as he aimlessly searched for something to watch on netflix.

"have you seen kingdom yet?" he asked, pausing on the title long enough for the preview to start playing, quickly muting it. you shook your head, making him giggle when your hair brushed against his neck. "do you wanna watch it?"

"i don't care," you said, snaking your arms around his torso. he exhaled, dropping his arm from the back of the couch and rubbing his hand over your shoulder blades. you smiled, and though he couldn't see it, he felt it.

"well what do you wanna watch?"

you sighed, snuggling against him. "i don't care," you repeated.

"yah." seokmin laughed. "weren't you the one that said we should watch something?"

you groaned, adjusting your posture and throwing your legs over his lap. "i just wanna be close to you."

he just exhaled, scrolling back up to his tried and true background noise series, hitting resume and unmuting before throwing his remote aside. you giggled as he lowered your back onto the couch, comfortably laying in front of him as he laid on his side with a hand to support his head. you gazed at his face as he squinted, trying to remember where in the series he had left off.

you glanced over at the screen, registering the animated characters. "is this when they find susan?"

"yeah," he said, rubbing his face. "i must have fallen asleep, i'm pretty sure the last thing i saw was jake pretending to be a rainicorn."

you laughed, tugging the pillow at the end of the couch under your head and shifting to face him better, his hand landing on your side as you casually fiddled with the collar of his shirt, fingers brushing against his throat as you studied his face. sensing your focus, he quirked his eyebrow and looked at you.

"can i help you?"

you exhaled. "am i not allowed to just admire you?"

he chuckled, tugging at his nose briefly in vague embarrassment. "you're ridiculous."

"why?" you pouted. "because i think you're incredibly handsome?"

seokmin just sighed. "yes."

"well you are," you stated, scooting closer his chest, making him laugh as he pulled on your waist to help you. "you're unbelievably handsome."

"nah," he said, shaking his head. "you're crazy."

your eyebrows knit together. "seokmin."

"hmm?"

you put your hands on his face, forcing him to look at you instead of the television. "you are one of the most handsome men i have ever met, and i've met a lot of men."

he chuckled shyly under your intense gaze. "hush."

"it's true!" your eyebrows knit further, making him laugh again. "seokmin, believe me! you are incredibly good looking."

he shook his head. "whatever you say, babe."

"seokmin," you warned. "you're handsome."

"okay, i'm handsome," he said finally, a slight smile on his lips. "if someone like you says so, i guess i can't argue."

"someone like me," you scoffed. "i don't even know what that means."

he eyed you. "you do know that you're drop dead gorgeous, right?"

you studied his face a moment. "well, if someone like you says so, i guess i can't argue."

"hey," he said teasingly, laughing. "seriously, i still don't get why you talked to me."

"because you're crazy hot," you said, making him let out an incredibly ungraceful pffft as you giggled. "and i kept talking to you because you are maybe the kindest person i've ever had the pleasure of talking to."

he blushed, pouting out his lips and shifting his focus to the show. "that's really sweet of you to say."

"i'm not just saying it, it's true," you said, shoving your head into the space between his arm and neck, making him laugh as he made room for you. "i love you so much."

"i love you," he said quietly, running his hand up your back. "i'm really glad i met you."

you smiled against him. "me too."

you were still snuggled into seokmin's chest when jeonghan called you on his way home from the office - though several episodes had passed - and he asked if you wanted him to swing by to grab you.

"or do you guys want dinner?" he asked, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel as he thought. "have you eaten?"

you looked at seokmin, putting your phone on speaker. "we haven't eaten. are you in the mood for something?"

jeonghan pouted a second. "not that i can think of. what about you?"

"sashimi," seokmin said without pause, making you laugh. he looked at you with round eyes and a smirk on his lips. "what, you think it's a joke?"

"you do suggest it every time i ask," jeonghan pointed out. "that sounds good, though. i'll pick some up and bring it over?"

"and stir fried octopus," you added. "and soju."

seokmin nudged you. "it's tuesday."

you widened your eyes as you looked away. "okay, old man. i just don't think this menu is meant to be eaten without soju."

jeonghan agreed with you, much to seokmin's false chagrin (he enjoyed drinking just as much as you did, he just liked to keep an adult front on workdays), and within the hour, the three of you were sat on the floor around the coffee table, eating and sharing several bottles of soju like it wasn't a tuesday.

"i just realized," you said suddenly, staring at jeonghan. "you've never slept here."

seokmin gasped dramatically. "you're right."

the architect only laughed as you poured three more glasses of soju, leaning back on a hand. "i had a custom mattress made for a reason. i like big beds."

"i thought you just liked beds that had us in it," you teased, pushing the shot towards him. "seokmin's bed is big enough, i'm pretty sure."

the three of you cheersed again, knocking back the clean alcohol. seokmin hissed before he spoke. "we all pile together, anyways."

jeonghan eyed him. "what day is it tomorrow?"

"wednesday," you stated, pausing to think about seokmin's schedule. "first lesson at ten thirty?"

"normally, yeah," he said. "but ryujin's out of town this week, so i don't have anything til noon."

you looked at jeonghan, eyes shining, and he waved his hand at you. "hey, don't look at me like that."

"sleepover?" you asked. "seriously, you won't believe how pretty the sunrises are."

"for real," seokmin corroborated. "the view's even better from the loft."

you nodded excitedly. "and instant coffee is surprisingly delicious. sometimes i miss it at home."

seokmin laughed at you, poking a finger into your side. "we can buy a jar for the house, dummy."

"no," you pouted, grabbing his hand. "it's special. i like only having it here."

jeonghan rolled his eyes. "if you two are done, i think we should call it a night."

"sleepover?" you asked again.

he sighed. "i don't know, i have a brunch meeting with a prospective client, and i should really get to the office early to prep for when they inevitably visit after."

as if planned, you and seokmin both planted your elbows on the table and put your hands on your cheeks, jutting out your lower lips at him. he groaned, leaned back on his palms and letting his head roll back as the two of you pouted. "please, hannie?" you whined.

he groaned again, more prolonged this time, as the two of you repeated your pleas in quick succession for a few seconds too long for the average lung capacity, eventually managing to wither his resolve. "fine, i'll ask seungkwan to set up. god, i don't like when you two gang up on me."

you cheered with seokmin, giggling as you stood to start clearing the table. he grinned at jeonghan. "what were you saying about us ganging up on you?"

"don't like it," he repeated, adjusting his posture and coughing once as if to punctuate his point, collecting the disposable chopsticks and used napkins onto one easily carryable plate.

"wrong," you stated plainly, bringing the empty soju bottles to the kitchen counter, wiping off your hands with a hanging towel. "i remember you enjoying it greatly on christmas."

seokmin pointed after you. "true. and i'm much more experienced now."

"hey," jeonghan said, trying to hide the nervousness that bubbled in him at the idea of the night going in that direction. "let's not start this."

"why?" you asked, returning and squatting behind him, your arms casually draping over his shoulders. "scared?"

"no," he exhaled, eyelids fluttering slightly when you placed a mostly innocent kiss behind his ear. "tired."

"bad excuse when there's two of us that can take care of you," seokmin said, grinning, repeating the phrase jeonghan usually gave when either of you said the same thing. you pulled your hands up to his shoulders, rubbing deep circles into them with your thumbs, eliciting a low groan.

"you work too hard," you muttered. "let us take care of you for a night."

seokmin watched his eyebrow pinch inwards as you rubbed a tight knot behind his neck, scooting around the table. "unless you have an actually good reason."

jeonghan sighed at the hand on his thigh, rolling his head to one side as seokmin's lips trailed across his jawline and your hands continued massaging into his tense shoulders. he wasn't one to secede control, and you both knew that - he liked being in charge, calling the shots. but you hadn't been wrong about him enjoying his christmas present greatly, and a big part of that had been the surprise of it.

well, that, he thought. and also when you choked him.

so he sighed again, focusing on how seokmin's fingers gripped gently at his thigh through his pants, how you placed light kisses on the crown of his skull and kept working knots out of his shoulders, and how seokmin smiled against his cheek at the realization that he was definitely going to let the two of you take care of him.

"i don't," he finally admitted. "but let's clean up first, yeah?" you sighed into a laugh.

"how about this," seokmin said, retreating slightly to look the other in the eyes. "you two go upstairs while i clean up, and i'll join you in a minute."

jeonghan cowered slightly as he looked between seokmin's eyes, feeling himself react to the low tone in his voice, and you were biting your lip to stifle a giggle as you ran your palms down his shoulders. "o-okay."

seokmin grinned, placing a slow kiss on his lips and barely pulling away when he said a quiet "good boy."

in that moment, jeonghan realized, he was absolutely fucked.

seokmin gave you a brief kiss after both of you were standing, and you tugged on jeonghan's arm until he was following you up the stairs as seokmin cleared the table. it took seconds for you to pull him into you, your arms around his neck and a smirk on your lips as you kissed him, noticing that the bulge in his pants was already halfway to ready.

"that was fast," you teased.

"not fair," he whined. "he's never acted like that towards me."

"never?" you asked, in slight disbelief as you threaded your fingers in his hair. "all those times you've fucked and you've never let him top?"

you grinned when you noticed his ears getting red as he ran his hands over your hips. "you're not a perfect angel, either."

you giggled and kissed him again, slowly, your lips pulling at his lightly "at least i let him fuck me."

"hey, he's fucked me," jeonghan said, almost indignant. "i'm just… usually in control."

"okay, power bottom," you joked, tugging gently at the hair at the base of his scalp, smiling at his reactionary huff. "when are you gonna let him really fuck you?"

jeonghan stopped for a second, studying your eyes. "do you think i should tonight?"

you ran your tongue over your teeth, fingers teasing at his quickening pulse. "i think you should let us both fuck you tonight."

his forehead hit yours as he gently pulled your hips against him, the breath between you heavy. he had an idea of what you meant - hints in the past of what you and seokmin had gotten up to while he wasn't around, implications of how you had helped seokmin prepare himself - but he still wanted confirmation. "you're gonna fuck me?"

you smiled against his lips. "is that what you want, hannie?"

he kept trying to close the distance as you backed up to the bed. "i wouldn't be opposed."

"that's not an answer," you prompted, fingers undoing the buttons of his shirt as his lips desperately chased after yours. "do i have to ask again?"

he flinched at your touch against his now exposed stomach, his skin overly sensitive from anticipation. "sweetheart, don't make me-"

"don't make you what?" you asked. "beg?"

he watched your lips curl and swallowed harshly. "please don't."

"i'm not asking you to beg, sweetheart," you teased, pulling his shirt completely out from his belted slacks. "i just want you to tell me directly. do you want me to fuck you?"

jeonghan could tell his ears were red. his cheeks, too, probably. he could feel the heat radiating off his face and neck in response to your teasing, and he couldn't deny how tight his pants felt, either. and while it wasn't a role you filled for him often (with him, sure, when the two of you liked to utilized seokmin's quick recovery time), he had to admit how fucking good you were as a domme.

"yes."

you grinned. "was that so hard?"

no, he thought, but something else definitely was, and the way you kissed him certainly did not help. you pushed the shirt off his shoulders, letting it fall to the ground as he kneaded at your ass, pulling you against him in desperate need to some kind of friction for his aching member. he moaned into your mouth when your hand found it, and you smiled against him as you unbuckled his belt.

"lay down, darling," you said, shoving his pants over his hips to pool on the ground.

he felt a twinge of embarrassment, realizing he was practically naked in front of you while you were still fully clothed, but just nodded as he sat on the edge of the bed, frantically pushing his pants off his feet as he backed up to get comfortable.

you had a drawer in seokmin's dresser, filled with spare clothes that had mostly come from your own apartment when you had finally moved out, but you also had a drawer in his nightstand, containing some things that the two of you played with on occasion. you were swift in dropping your sweats to the floor and pulling out a vibrator and a bottle of lube, and while jeonghan was no stranger to having fun with toys, he was generally the user, not the recipient. memories of how he had cruelly put you on edge until you were begging made him nervous for the payback he was likely in store for as you crawled over him, straddling his thighs, only being snapped out of his thoughts when seokmin appeared at the top of the stairs.

"you forgot this," he said casually, holding the tie jeonghan had been wearing that day. the one he had pulled off his neck when the three of you had eaten earlier. the one he had used to tie your wrists to a bedpost, once upon a time.

you noticed his adam's apple bob as he propped himself up on his elbows to look at seokmin as he pulled off his shirt, and you set aside the toy and lube to run your hands down his chest. "calm down, hannie. we're not as mean as you."

he gave you an look. "i'm not mean."

you giggled, your fingers teasing at the waistband of his underwear as you felt the bed shift behind you. "of course you aren't."

jeonghan fell back against the mattress as he watched seokmin come up behind you, dropping the tie to run his hands over your waist, kissing at your neck. he groaned when your eyes fluttered shut, his squirming practically begging you to keep touching him as his member strained against soft fabric.

"so needy," seokmin commented, directed at the architect as one hand glided down your bare thigh and the other went up to cup a breast. jeonghan looked at the two of you with half lidded eyes, grasping urgently at your fingers on his hip. "you're pretty on your back."

jeonghan knew he was blushing again, and he wondered if he would ever be able to recover his dominating persona over you when seokmin's low tone made him drop so deeply into an obedient mood. you smiled down at him as you let your palm run over his throbbing length, making him let out a long relieved moan. "is this what you wanted, baby?"

"fuck, y/n," he gasped, clutching at the sheets. "i need more."

"trying so hard to be in charge," you said, reaching for the vibrator as you continued rubbing against his length. "we're taking care of you, remember?" you placed the tip of the toy at the base of his cock, watching him flinch at the contact. "what color, baby?"

jeonghan swallowed harshly, realizing he had never been on the answering end of such a common question in your relationship, staring up at you with wide eyes as seokmin smirked against your neck. "g-green."

you pushed a button, the vibrator buzzing to life against him, and his back lifted off the mattress briefly as his body reacted to the vibrations. he threw his arm over his face, burying his eyes in the crook of his elbow as he moaned awfully loud, mouth gaping open.

seokmin paused his work against your neck, getting distracted by the way jeonghan's arm fell over his forehead as he looked down at where you were gently holding the vibrator against his dick. seokmin felt his own arousal awakening, shifting his hips slightly to press his length against your lower back, and you were only smiling when jeonghan looked up at you again.

"does it feel good, hannie?" you asked, slowly moving the toy up his shaft.

"oh g-god, fuck!" his eyes clamped shut, nails digging into your thigh. "f-fuck it feels s-so good."

the wet spot at the tip of his dick only grew, precum soaking through his underwear as his hips bucked. "on the lowest setting?" you teased. "i don't think you'll be able to handle the higher ones."

jeonghan's eyes shot open. "please."

it was seokmin who answered. "please what?"

he groaned again, his cock lifting off his pelvis as you put the tip of the toy at his base again, the vibrations running through his balls. "i can take more."

you smiled, pushing the secondary button at the base of the vibrator, watching jeonghan's stomach tense as the vibrations increased, letting out a string of expletives. seokmin focused more attention on your body, fingers slipping under your shirt and a hand reaching down to run over your core. you sighed at the contact, and jeonghan glanced down at where the lean, piano trained fingers teased at your most sensitive areas, his hips pushing up against your hands.

he groaned, his hand running up his own torso. "fuck, you're sexy."

you giggled, unsure if even he knew exactly who he was talking to, but you decided he likely meant you both, considering the way he blearily looked between the two of you as seokmin worked you up. you moaned, your head falling back to his shoulder, but your eyes stayed trained on jeonghan's pleasure twisted face. his legs squirmed beneath you, bumping up against your inner thighs as he tried to put his heels the bed, hoping to gain more control, but the two of you straddling over him stopped him in his efforts. seokmin pulled your shirt off of you, kneading at your uncovered breasts, and jeonghan could do nothing but gape. you pushed the button to ramp up the vibrations once more, making him gasp and clutch at your wrist.

"color?"

"green," he exclaimed sharply, eyes opening to squint at you, only to clamp shut again. "fuck fuck fuck fuck, green."

"you're not gonna cum, are you?" you asked, cocking your head and biting at your lip when seokmin pushed your panties aside with a finger to feel your gathering wetness. "we've barely even started."

he shook his head, mouth hanging open. "i'm not cumming 'til i'm in you."

"always so damn bossy," seokmin laughed, glowering at jeonghan as he pushed his fingers into you, making the architect groan. "can't you just enjoy?"

you removed the vibrator and pulled at the waistband of jeonghan's underwear, and he got excited for a moment as his hazy mind cleared, thinking you were finally going to give him what he wanted, but you just placed the vibrator against his pelvis and let his underwear push his dick against it. he whimpered once before he could stop himself, turning beet red when he saw your shiteating grin.

"oh my god, you're so cute," you said, leaning forward, and seokmin pulled his hand from your core to admire the way your ass looked as you hovered over your boyfriend, his hands immediately kneading at your soft flesh and teasing at your panty-clad core. you cupped jeonghan's jaw with both hands, and he looked up at you, lips parted, his stomach tense from the overwhelming sensation, as you just placed gentle kisses against his blushed cheeks and nose. "how do you feel, baby?"

he let out a brief whine, hands on your waist. "i don't know how much longer-"

he was interrupted when you gasped, reacting to seokmin pulling your panties aside and rubbing the head of his cock against your wet folds. your head fell to the pillow beside jeonghan's and he looked over your shoulder, finding the musician's eyes trained on him and his underwear and shorts shoved down over his thighs, thick cock on full display. jeonghan moaned again at the sight, his own dick aching for something more than just a vibrator, hips pushing upwards and his arms wrapping around you as he did everything in his power to not stoop to begging.

"my sweet babies," seokmin said, rubbing his cock against you, looking down at your soaking pussy briefly as he squeezed your ass with one hand. "no cumming, okay? neither of you."

your head shot up, suddenly realizing that while you were ganging up on jeonghan, seokmin still had seniority over you. jeonghan just stared up at you, still grasping at your waist, and your mouth dropped open as seokmin pushed into you.

"fuck," jeonghan whined, eyes shutting as your stomach pushed his cock harder against the vibrator. "th-this is so unfair."

"sorry," seokmin chuckled, slightly airy as your walls squeezed around him. "i can't resist when she bends over like that."

you kissed jeonghan, messily and needily, and all he could do was groan against you as you got fucked from behind, desperately wishing he could be in either of your positions.

"shit, seokmin," you gasped, a hand going back to clutch his where it stayed against your hip. you could feel your orgasm approaching fast, no matter how badly you wanted to behave. "fuck, i'm-"

"i said no cumming," he said, panting slightly as he repeatedly slammed into you. jeonghan's eyes wandered to how every inch of you jiggled above him with seokmin's movements, and he was almost okay with being stuck with a vibrator if it meant getting this view.

"i-" you squeezed your eyes shut, hand clutching the back of jeonghan's neck as you tried to stave off your imminent need. "i-i'm trying-"

"god, you can't help it, can you?" seokmin groaned. "you're sucking me in, you're so desperate for cock."

"cum," jeonghan whispered, meeting your eyes when they fluttered open. you gaped at him and he gave you a sly smile.

"i'll be good," you said, glaring at jeonghan best you could.

seokmin pulled your hips back against him harshly. "you better be."

"cum," jeonghan repeated, voice low enough to stay hidden behind the sound of seokmin slamming into you. you kissed him, trying to shut him up, but he just used it as an opportunity to push his tongue into your mouth, making you moan against him before you pulled away. "cum, angel. make him mad."

"nngh, god, fuck you," you managed, shaking as your body won over your willpower and your orgasm crashed over you. jeonghan grinned victoriously, pulling you down to kiss him as seokmin grunted behind you, fucking you through your bliss, because despite his frustration that you couldn't follow a simple rule, he wasn't so cruel to not let you enjoy it.

when your body was finally able to relax, seokmin slowed his hips and pulled out of you, pushing you aside to roll onto your back next to the man you had been fucked over. he pulled his shorts and boxers back over his cock and reached down to remove the vibrator, making jeonghan sigh in relief, wishing seokmin's hand had lingered a little longer over his member before he had turned off the toy. his knees bent, lifting off the mattress for the first time since he had laid down, and he groaned at the stiffness.

"what did i say?" seokmin asked, not even looking at you as he tossed the toy aside.

you whined. "it's jeonghan's fault," you said immediately. his neck practically snapped to look at you, laid out beside him. "he was egging me on."

"was not," he lied, trying to catch his breath, annoyed that you had instantly ratted him out. "you're just too easy."

you let out an indignant squeal, the back of your hand hitting his arm, ready to argue when seokmin interrupted. "so you're both brats."

you both looked at seokmin, his jaw tight, and jeonghan could only gulp as you tried to get up on your shaky thighs.

"i'm sorry," you said, kneeing yourself over to him. "i'm sorry, i didn't want to, i swear."

jeonghan watched in disbelief as you grovelled, thinking about how you were never that nice for him. seokmin pulled you up against him, a hand on your ass as he kissed you deeply and you melted against his chest.

"i think you deserve to be a cocksleeve tonight, baby." he said against your lips. "is that fair?"

you exhaled, disappointed in yourself more than anything, but nodded nonetheless. "yes."

he brought his hand down against your ass firmly, making you gasp. "underwear off," he said, then turned his attention to jeonghan as you immediately went to follow his instruction. "and you," he said, extending a hand.

jeonghan took it, gasping lightly when seokmin tugged him off the mattress easily, forcing him to sit up in front of him.

"you told her to cum?"

he cowered under seokmin's firm gaze, mouth suddenly dry as he tried to think of a way to lie himself out of the situation. seokmin's eyebrow quirked when he didn't respond immediately, acting as a prompt for him to answer. "y-yeah," he said finally, internally cursing at the way he couldn't make himself disobey.

seokmin's tongue clicked, studying his face. "sounds like you deserve a little punishment, too."

jeonghan gulped, eyes wide as he wondered what the musician considered punishment. "i thought you were gonna take care of me."

"oh, i will," seokmin said, pulling jeonghan off the bed with him. he stood on stiff legs, still recovering from being pressed against the mattress for so long. "i'm gonna take real good care of you, baby boy," he muttered, pulling jeonghan's hips against his, making him let out a quick whine. "i'm gonna fuck you deep and long and hard, and you're gonna be a perfect angel for me, aren't you?"

jeonghan's knees were practically knocking together in anticipation, nodding quickly. "for you, yes."

"for who?" seokmin asked?

"for you, minnie."

he tsked. "not quite, baby boy. for who?"

jeonghan felt like he was at the peak of a rollercoaster, his stomach flipping as seokmin's hands slipped below his underwear, gripping his ass and pushing their cocks together. he winced, his eyebrows knitting in desperation as he panted lightly. "for you, daddy."

seokmin grinned. "good boy."

your jaw dropped, watching bare-ass naked from bed as they kissed, and you thought for a second that this definitely had to happen again.

"face down, baby," seokmin said to you over jeonghan's shoulder, pushing his underwear off. "get ready."

you nodded and got on your knees, settling your chest against the mattress and waiting patiently.

"go ahead, hannie," seokmin said, sending him off with a kiss to his lips and a slap to his ass. "sink in."

jeonghan hesitated briefly, looking back at seokmin before he kneed his way onto the bed behind you, but almost immediately got distracted by the way your pussy spread for him, having already been fucked open once. his cock flinched as he gripped at your ass, admiring the way moisture dripped from your hole to your clit.

you pushed back against him. "he said sink in," you whined.

he laughed lightly. "you just look too good," he said, holding the base of his cock as he guided himself against your folds. you moaned, cheek pressed to the mattress, and jeonghan had to throw his head back to keep himself from immediately fucking you like an animal as he began to sink into your warmth. he moaned out loud, exhaling and pushing back his hair. "fuck you feel even better."

he pumped into you slowly once, twice, then paused hilt deep. seokmin had removed the remainder of his clothes before grabbing the tie off the bed, the flash of color catching jeonghan's attention.

"what's that f-"

he gasped when seokmin tugged his arms behind him, his cock flinching in you as seokmin expertly tied the silky fabric around his wrists. "what's the color, baby boy?"

jeonghan's mind swam, his hips flush against your ass as seokmin pushed him over your bent body. "green," he gasped. "holy fuck, green."

seokmin laughed lightly, nudging jeonghan's knees apart to spread him out better. "the tie's teal, actually. seungkwan would be very upset that you called it green."

"please don't mention seungkwan right now," jeonghan rushed out.

you giggled despite yourself, then wiggled your hips lightly, enjoying the way jeonghan let out a garbled moan.

"i thought i told you you were a cocksleeve, baby," seokmin said, grabbing the lube from where you had left it, rubbing a glob between his fingers to warm it slightly before he pressed it against jeonghan's puckered hole.

you bit your lip when the cock in you flinched in reaction. "i'm sorry."

"it's okay, baby girl," he said, massaging his thumb against jeonghan, who had his forehead against your spine as he whined. "just be good for us, alright?"

you nodded, peeking over your shoulder as seokmin smiled warmly at you.

"now hannie," he said, teasing around his hole. "it's been a little while since you've bottomed."

"i'll be fine," jeonghan gasped. "please, i swear i can take it."

seokmin shook his head, laughing lightly. "me? you think you can take my cock?"

he nodded against your spine. "please, i need it."

"baby boy, i think you forget how big i am," he said, pushing a finger into him. jeonghan's mouth gaped, and he pushed his eye against your back as seokmin quickly found his prostate. "i don't want to hurt you. be good."

jeonghan couldn't even form words as seokmin squirted more lube against him, working it into his hole as he slowly added another finger. his hips were pushing impossibly further into you as seokmin finger fucked him, working him wider until he thought he was ready for another digit. jeonghan moaned again, brows knit together, vaguely focusing on your shoulder blade as his cheek pressed against your arched back.

when he was sufficiently prepared in seokmin's opinion, he pulled his fingers out of him completely, making him gasp and shudder, back curling as he tried to fuck into you. you whined loudly, and you swore, jeonghan felt bigger than you remembered, even after you had been fucked by your massively endowed boyfriend.

seokmin squirted an almost excessive amount of lube into his palm, sighing as he worked it over his member and put a hand on jeonghan's hips. "tell me if you need me to slow down."

"fuck, just fuck me, seokmin," he groaned, fingers curling over the satin tie. "please, i'm begging."

seokmin's lip quirked upwards and you glanced back at him, wondering if you heard him right. his tone was low when he asked, "begging?"

jeonghan winced, realizing what he had said, but knowing there was no going back. "please."

"please?"

he gasped when seokmin put the head of his cock against his hole. "please, daddy."

seokmin groaned deeply as he slowly pushed his hips forward, and jeonghan practically wailed against you. "oh, baby, we are so doing this more often."

jeonghan completely missed the sunrise you had raved about, and ended up cancelling his brunch meeting in the morning, feigning sickness and rescheduling for the following week. instead, he chose to extend the triple spoon situation the three of you found yourself in for as long as he could convince you both to stay under the covers with him, much later than you usually stayed. you had to drag him out of bed a quarter til noon, telling him that if he didn't want seokmin to have to explain to some child and their parent that he had a girlfriend and a boyfriend, and that the evening before had been too involved for one of them (you didn't say it was him, but it was heavily implied), then he had to get his ass in the car before they showed up. seokmin was laughing at the two of you, kissing you both goodbye after he got out of the shower.

you rolled your eyes at him as he draped pathetically in the passenger seat as you drove back to the house. "you're sad."

he groaned dramatically, shifting in his seat. "my ass hurts."

"you begged for it," you pointed out.

"whatever," he said, pouting. "can we order takeout?"

you laughed looking over at him briefly. "do what you want, babe."

it seemed like you and jeonghan never went to events anymore, more often choosing to stay in with this one handsome music teacher you knew. jeonghan walked through the doors you had left open, entering the moodily lit music room one friday evening after getting home from the office. normally, seokmin got picked up by your boyfriend on his way home, but he had been able to leave the company early and bussed over to sit with you at the piano for a while. you enjoyed his impromptu concert, because despite having to play it all week for work, he still found therapy in tickling the keys and hearing your soft hummed melodies accompanying his improvisations.

"you wanna go to a fundraiser dinner next weekend?"

you spun on the bench to face the architect. "fundraiser for what?"

jeonghan tossed his jacket onto the armchair in the corner as he walked towards you. "impoverished youth art programs. you can say no, but you'd be depriving a child of their creativity."

that made seokmin laugh, making his playing pause as a hand when up to cover his mouth. you giggled with him. "well then, yeah, i guess i wanna go."

"what about you?" jeonghan asked, nodding to seokmin. "you coming?"

seokmin turned suddenly, his chest facing you as he studied jeonghan's face. "you want me to come?"

"it doesn't have to be a date," he said, his tone showing his own hesitance to make your unique relationship public. "you could come as our guest. it's a good cause, and it's not crazy to invite a music teacher to a fundraiser for artistic youths."

seokmin thought about it, but denied the invitation after a few minutes of consideration, saying that it would be impossible for him to not make it painfully obvious that he was in love with one or both of you the entire night. he knew he made the right decision when he saw you both come down the stairs that evening from his vantage point in the kitchen, reminded of how the two of you cleaned up for these events.

"are you sure you wanna stay?" you asked, hands on seokmin's chest. "we bought three seats. you can still come with us."

he laughed, careful to not pay too close attention to how well the dress you wore fit as his hands ghosted up your sides. this used to be the only way he ever saw you, and it was no wonder he couldn't take his eyes off you back then. he still couldn't, but for different reasons. "i'll be fine for four hours, babe. besides, i don't know how to be serious at these things. i would laugh too loud."

"order something good for dinner, okay?" jeonghan said, grabbing your jacket from the closet. "i expect a report about your delicious delivery food."

seokmin rolled his eyes as you giggled, but his voice was sweet when he said "yes, jeonghan."

you had almost forgotten what it was like at these events - it had been a good three months since you had last gone to one. jeonghan proudly introduced you as his partner to several people that hadn't seen him in a while (it was hard to believe there was anyone left that you hadn't met yet, really, but every event pulled a new crowd), and you easily answered questions about how important the cause was for you.

"my family had to work really hard to afford piano lessons when i was growing up," you told one group, feeling bold with jeonghan's hand on your back. "i applied to a million scholarships and still had to work every weekend to be able to afford my music degree, but i finally graduated last month. i got lucky, and i just hope it can be easier for other kids."

jeonghan never stopped being impressed by you, how easily you fit in with any audience he brought you to. for a self-proclaimed introvert, you sure knew how to work a crowd, even if it made you quieter on the way home. he was about to sit you down at your designated table for the evening when a familiar voice called out to him.

"oh, mr. kim mingyu," jeonghan said, a teasingly serious tone to his voice as he addressed his old friend, your neck nearly breaking to look. "it's been too long. have you met my lovely lady?"

you saw the flash of recognition on mingyu's face, and you stared at him helplessly, both relieved and confused when he said he hadn't. jeonghan introduced you again, and you gulped at the stitch in the taller's eyebrow when he politely shook your hand. despite wanting to say something for the sake of the introduction, you couldn't make your voice work, and wouldn't have been able to come up with any words even if it had.

"hey, i have to get back to the program," he said, then explained the company he worked for was co-sponsoring the event. "let's catch up after dinner?"

you were mortified, to say the least, considering the first and last time you had seen kim mingyu, you had been introduced to him by his good friend seokmin, after you had emerged from his bedroom wearing what could easily be classified as pajamas. he knew you had gotten more serious since then. you had sneakily peeked at texts seokmin had sent, making him laugh as he made no effort to hide them, when mingyu had asked what kind of vacation he was taking after hearing his niece's lesson was cancelled that week. you even posed for the picture seokmin sent in response, both of your faces at the bottom of the screen as he pointed at the gate sign that said you were flying to nagoya together, back when you were going to see the cherry blossoms near a newly built diner and eatery. jeonghan had flown out a week ahead to oversee construction, and the two of you met him as they wrapped it up.

so you stared after him, and when you were seated at the table and you couldn't bear it anymore, you tugged on jeonghan's sleeve and hurriedly whispered in his ear.

"i've met mingyu before."

his brow quirked, trying to remember every time he had seen the younger in the last year or so. "when? did you see him on halloween?"

"no," you said, and he noticed the worry in your eyes. "at seokmin's apartment. he brings his niece to lessons."

jeonghan stared at you a second as he understood the situation. "oh."

"i have to tell him," you said, looking around. "right? he probably thinks i'm cheating on his friend."

"either that, or he thinks i'm paying you." you gave him a sideways glare, and he chuckled, putting a hand against your back, understanding your distress at being perceived either way. "honestly, he's probably going to text seokmin as soon as he can pull his phone out, but i can talk to him about it after dinner, okay?"

you exhaled slowly, fingers pressing into your forehead. "okay. god, this is annoying."

"it'll be fine," jeonghan assured you. "don't worry about it. he's an understanding guy. just enjoy dinner, we're paying an absurd amount for it."

you eyed him. "for the kids."

he laughed, glad that you could still joke with him. "yeah, for the kids."

only half an hour later, you excused yourself from the conversation at your assigned table, eyeing the empty seat next to jeonghan as you to retreated to a restroom. when you were walking in the hotel hallway headed back to the ballroom that held dinner, you heard a hushed "hey," spinning your head towards the obvious call for your attention.

mingyu stood at a corner, tugging at his suit jacket. "can i talk to you for a second?"

you glanced back towards the ballroom, suddenly wishing jeonghan had some kind of spidey sense so he could come to your rescue as you stepped towards the tall man you barely knew. "uh, yeah, actually, i wanted to talk to you, too."

"you're not gonna try to date me, too, are you?"

his tone mismatched how you felt about his question, a teasing smile on his lips. you exhaled sharply, annoyed. "no, god, can i just explain myself?"

"me first," mingyu said, stopping you before you could continue. "did you see the girl i'm sitting with?"

you nodded slowly, studying his face, trying to understand his play. you had, admittedly, been nervously staring at his table for most of the last thirty minutes.

"that's my girlfriend," he said. "we work together, and we've only been dating a few months, but i really like her. and she likes me." he paused, eyes wandering. "and she, uh, also really likes my long-term boyfriend."

you stared at him, processing his words. "hang on-"

mingyu grinned, awkwardly gesturing at the invisible surprise. "seokmin came out to me? to be fair, i was accusing his girlfriend of cheating on him, so he didn't have much of a choice, but-"

"you're poly?" you interrupted, a smile creeping across your lips. "like, in a relationship with multiple partners?"

"uh, yeah," he said, rubbing his chin. "i'm poly, i guess? it's pretty new, but the two of them have been really fantastic about it."

"me too!" you laughed. "oh my god, i've never met anyone else who- hang on, what exactly did seokmin tell you?"

mingyu thought a second, shoving his hands in his pockets. "first of all, he was offended that i would even suggest you two would do something like that to him. then he sent me a picture of him in jeonghan's kitchen."

despite the second hand recount, your boyfriend's defense of you still made your heart flutter slightly. "and you figured it out from there?"

"well," he cocked his head. "i made him explain more, and then i called him gay, but those were the important points."

you shook your head, smiling. "i can't believe it. of all the people in the world."

"trust me, i'm just as shocked as you are," he said, laughing. "when i gave jeonghan seokmin's number, i didn't think they'd end up dating."

you looked around suddenly. "it's still kind of a secret, at least at these things," you said. "can we keep it that way?"

"yeah, of course, i get it." mingyu nodded, sniffing suddenly. "the industry's cruel. your secret's safe with me as long as mine is with you."

"absolutely," you agreed. "but i am telling jeonghan."

"great," he laughed. "maybe he'll start inviting me to hang out more."

the relief surrounding you was palpable when you sat down, and jeonghan had noticed mingyu returning to his table the same time as you. "sorted?"

you nodded, smiling. "you'll never believe it."

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sweetestlamb · 4 years ago

Text

Wake Me Up Inside(Chapter 2)

Summary: Hope is a flickering light, coming and going as it sees fit.

Author's note: Y'all like this? Color me surprised I thought everyone had cast Sujin aside based on tumblr post honestly, expected maybe 3 people to read this. I'm happy so many are enjoying, thanks for coming along for the ride. If any talented individuals want to make me a header that would be great, anyway enjoy the teen angst. More awful parenting, beware. it hurts me to write this but random immediate romance doesn’t make sense to me so here we goooo.

The world seems larger, everyone towers over her as they squeeze by jostling her tiny body, she twists and turns desperately searching for a familiar face and faltering when there is none. Just blurred faces with stretched out smiles that are horrifying grotesque, almost as if they were painted on by a deranged circus clown. She begins to run frantically racing away from the figures, who are now reaching out for her grabbing her arm and tugging at her pigtails. She opens her mouth but nothing comes out, bringing a trembling hand to her lips she finds them sewn shut, silencing her petrified screams.

Then a hand clutches at her elbow and she's spun around, suddenly staring into the face of evil.

"Where have you been you brat? Everyone was waiting for you."

She tries to tug free of his punishing grip but his fingers tighten on her tender flesh, marking the delicate skin. Ignoring her evident trepidation he forcefully pushes her towards a table, with a large looming birthday cake.

"Hurry up and blow out these candles, you're almost old enough to be useful to me."

Screaming no in her mind, she breaks free of his hold running as fast as her compact legs will take her but she miscalculates and trips over a stray toy, tumbling over the edge of a pool she hadn't noticed there earlier. The cold splash of the chlorine scented water on her skin shocks her in a panicked daze and when she pries her eyes open the menacing face of her father greets her looking nonplussed by her hectic drowning.

"Good riddance." He smirks sipping from his cup as he stalks away, no longer bothered with her.

Water constructs her airway and she continues to sink to the bottom. Forgotten and discarded.

With a flash she bursts from her nightmare silent scream on her tongue, it's his presence that silences her cry. Wide feline eyes regard her from his crouched position, it takes a moment to realize that the rapid puffs of air filling the room are coming from her lips. She grips at the mattress beneath her, hopelessly pleading with her heart and lungs as her body quivers from the intensity of her dream.

"Are you okay? You looked like you were having a bad dream, I called your name a few times."

She's decidedly not any semblance of okay and has no concept of what that would entail for her but she finds herself nodding, lying as easily as she always does.

"I'm fine." Clipped and brisk despite the cold sweat on her skin, she's probably soaked through his shirt the collar almost plastered to red collar bones.

He doesn't reply further than pursing his lips and walking over to a dresser she'd hadn't noticed earlier.

"That lie would probably be more believable if you didn't look as if you were going to pass out at any second." She can hear his eyes rolling at her and it raises her heckles, she doesn't need anyone looking after her, she is fine on her own.

"I should go." She says curtly, forcing herself out of the dangerously warm bed to walk across the room and test her previously soaked pajamas. Damp, but they'll do.

"I thought you had nowhere to go." He challenges finally standing to his full height, subconsciously she flinches at the sudden movement and immediately he takes a step back pressing himself almost flush with the wall. Lowering his head until they are almost eye level. Shame washes over her do strongly she has to turn away, so pathetic.

Speaking to his bedpost she answers, "That was last night. I can go home now."

Her father will be at work until late into the evening, she just needs to lock herself in her room and she should be safe until school tomorrow.

He hums at her sounding closer than he did earlier, "You don't have to go. I'll find an excuse to give my mom, you can stay here."

No she can't. She knows what's going through his mind, probably the same thing that went through Suho's when he saw the blood on her lip for the first time, you poor little thing. Pity was always the first reaction but it never lasted, eventually pity shifted to annoyance nobody wanted to be friends with someone getting beaten. It was depressing, and uncomfortable to discuss and there was nothing anyone could do to help her. It was her penance for being born a girl and not being the best at least to make up for that disappointment.

"I'm not a stray puppy, you can't just pick me up off the street and expect me to stay. I told you, I'm fine." This time she says it harder, sharper with a bite that screams don't push me.

Unsurprisingly enough Han Seojun doesn't seem intimidated by her.

This time she gets to witness the eye roll as he approaches her but still keeps his head lowered as if deferring to her. "I already told you that I don't pity you, you need help stop pretending you don't."

But she's not pretending, that would imply that she wants others to help secretly. That just isn't accurate, she wants nothing- expects nothing. Her father pound any inkling of hope she had out a long time ago.

Stepping into his space, her eyes narrow as she bites out, "I don't need anything certainly not help from you. You're not a nice person, what am I your one good deed? Just mind your business."

She pointedly glances away at the flash of hurt that scatters across his expressive face.

She expects him to lash out, stretch to his full form and berate her, reprimand her ungrateful behavior and an even darker side of her almost expects him to slap her. I see why your father does that, you deserve it.

"Suit yourself."

That's all he says solemnly with a shrug before tossing more dry clothes at the bed and silently exiting the room.

She feels worse than she did before. Guilt gnawing at her, she ignores the offered clothes she doesn't deserve his hospitality or warmth. She disrobes and puts back on the damp chilled pajamas, that matches her better.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

That's what he gets for trying to help someone, his act of kindness thrown back in his face. Angrily he pours the boiling water into the waiting cup, starting his mother's mandatory morning tea. He's so lost in the routine that he doesn't notice her presence until she clears her throat. His pride stops him from turning around, her words were as painful as a dagger.

"Your clothes are on the bed. I called a cab."

He nods without looking back, "Get home saf--" He cuts himself off, maybe he's overstepping again. So he just hums and stirs the now perfect cup of tea with a splash of milk. His sister's will get three sugars, she has such a sweet tooth.

The soft snap of the front door closing is loud in the silence of the morning, the sun has barely risen. His mother will be out in an hour, he was worried for nothing. Nobody will even know she was here. He can pretend this was all a fever dream and listen to her advice, he's never minded anyone else's business why did he decide to start now?

Lesson learned.

He spends the remainder of his weekend not thinking about the bruises on her face and instead plays video games, bullying Suho into playing Call of Duty with him online until the stupid genius starts to win too often and it's no longer stress reducing.

"Sore loser." He scoffs at the staticky insult through his headphones, draining the can of soda he took from the fridge. He should start dinner soon, his mom and sister will be back from shopping any minute.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"You just did." He can't help but roll his eyes at the lame response but he pushes on ignoring his brain shouting at him that this is the opposite of minding his business. He hardly listens to his brain, his gut is much stronger.

"Does Sujin have any siblings? Or does she like to box or anything like that? " He tries to make sense of the night, maybe it wasn't what he thought initially. From his memory Sujin comes from a very affluent respectable family, there's no way right?

"What? What kind of question is that?"

"Just answer me." He quips impatiently, ready to let go of this unwarranted worry that's been weighing on his heart.

After a long pause where he checks if his Wi-Fi disconnected he finally hears a response, "No. She lives with her mother and father, she's an only child. And I’ve never known her to do anything physical like that."

His chest tightens, not what he wanted to hear. Her flinch this morning flashes brightly in his memory. He wasn't mistaken. He's sure of it, she'd been scared.

"Why?"

He can barely hear through the ringing in his ear, "Nothing. I have to go."

He signs off before the other boy can reply, walking autopilot to the kitchen to get started on dinner. Chopping vegetables does nothing to stop the nausea bubbling in his stomach.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Taking the bus the next day is out of the question, he has spent the entire weekend wishing he had the nerve to get the girl's number but anyone he asked would misunderstand why and he didn't need anymore rumors circulating, he would just have to get it from her himself. If she wanted him to mind his business she shouldn't have collapsed where he could see.

The engine rumbles between his legs as he brings his motorcycle to a stop, swinging off effortlessly before tugging the helmet off and shaking his hair free. He doesn't notice the various lecherous female and male eyes watching his very moment, too focused on walking into the school and finding her.

Turning a corner he sees her instantly, sandwiched between her two best friends, they look like a high school brochure giggling as they walk down the hallway garnering the attention of most of the male population. The purple bruise on her cheek is missing, nothing but smooth blemish free skin. He almost does a double take. As all three of them pass him, he locks eyes with Sujin for a moment, the mask slides off for a second but the moment he blinks the façade snaps back into place, nothing left but a pretty empty smile.

He follows them into class, sliding into his seat and promptly going to sleep. He has to catch her alone.

Doing so proves to be a near impossible feat, she's always surrounded by her two bestie shadows and Chorong and the gang are never far from him either. He sighs forlornly even time he sees her only for someone to interrupt before he can approach her. All too frustrated.

He's sitting dejected on the staircase when he hears the bustle of students in the hallway, their voices carrying down the long space and he rolls his eyes imagining what ridiculous situation they've deemed as drama now. Last time it was Ju-Kyung having pimples, a topic that was completely groundbreaking and worthy of weeks of discussion. So it's with the smallest shred of curiosity that he stands up wandering over to the commotion.

"What's going on?" He directs to the closest person, some mousy looking girl who stutters out an indecipherable answer. He looks at her confused before stalking away to find someone who has a better grasp of communication. He poses the question again, to a boy this time.

"I heard one of the girls started freaking out in the bathroom. Screaming not to be touched."

He stands frozen before the words register in his brain and his feet are moving without his brain's permission. Shoving past gossiping bystanders, he easily gets to the front only to see Ju-Kyung covering someone with her sweater as they walk down the hallway. Immediately the crowd comes alive and they surge forward like a wave all calling questions out at once, "What's wrong with you?", "Why did you freak out?", "Who do you think you are? Are you too rich to be touched or something?"

He twists his head around ferociously at the last question, everyone in front of him gulps while taking a step back. The hallway is a cacophony of voices and shouts and he can feel his anger boiling, slamming his fist into the nearest surface-a wall- he gets everyone's attention.

"Go back to your classes. Now."

Some of the male students look as if they are going to challenge his authority but another step forward is all it takes to get the student body scampering to their classrooms.

Inhaling deeply he stomps off to find the source of his unease.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

It had been hard to disregard, how lacking of warmth her house was. Seojun's apartment had been brimming with warmth and love, the fridge bursting with papers and drawings documenting that someone cared enough to show them off. Her home was a large empty prison in comparison.

But she'd been right, it was dark and quiet proof that her parents were not home. With her heart in her throat she ran to her room, locking the door behind her. Sleep captured her before she knew she was in its grasps, waking up groggy hours later and forgetting where she was. Fierce pounds on her door reminded her instantly.

"Open this door now."

His voice is a low growl, even more terrifying than when he's screaming his lungs out. She grabs her vanity chair pressing it under the door knob for more protection.

She jumps when the door bulges, the loud crashing making it clear that he's slamming bodily into the door now determined to get to her.

"Please....stop." She pleads, tears already cascading down her bruised cheeks.

"Open this fucking door!!"

She's sobbing now, body folded as she cries her eyes out shaking viciously as her father continues to ran into the door, dread filling her stomach as he's never fought this hard before.

Then everything is quiet.

The pounding is gone as suddenly as it arrived. She doesn't let go her panic just yet, still too raw. Butt seconds crawl to minutes and she hears nothing so she finally exhales, sliding to the floor in relief.

She weakly crawls to her bathroom, turning the dial to the hottest temperature possible wanting to burn off his brand on her skin. After her shower she brushes her wet hair, staring at the bruise, it's turning yellow now with tinges of purple. Good thing she let Su-ah and Ju-Kyung convince her to buy foundation the last time they were in the beauty store. She will have to layer it on tomorrow.

She's starving but the thought of leaving her room with him in the house is enough to eliminate her appetite. Instead she puts on a warm sweater and sweat pants and wraps herself in a thick blanket, still too cold ice running through her veins.

She had never felt as warm as she did at his house.

A quiet knock thankfully pulls her away from such unnecessary thoughts. She simply listens.

"Su-jin, it's mom. I brought you food."

She sits up, crawling out of bed to stand in front of the bed. Her mother has never brought her food, even when she was nine and hadn't gotten a perfect score on her spelling test and her father locked her in the closet for two days with only a dictionary. She'd contemplated eating the pages before she was finally set free. Her mother had simply looked away, avoiding eye contact until she was safely back in her room.

But her stomach grumbles at the mention of sustenance and despite her best judgement she opens the door.

It's a mistake.

Immediately she notes that her mother has nothing in her hands, trembling herself and before she can slam the door shut a foot blocks her escape.

He uses the belt that time whipping her in places that others will never see, her back, thighs, and shoulders. Her mother's weakly calls out, "Don't hit her face she has to meet that boy you wanted this week."

It goes on for what seems like hours, he leaves her crumpled on the ground her body stinging as she refused to cry, blinking her tears away not wanting to give him what he wants. When her mother meekly walks over and extends a hand to her, she looks at her with listless eyes. Her mother has a fresh bruise on her cheek, her father hardly hits her anymore using Sujin has his punching bag instead but at times of high frustration he would regress.

She wonders if her mother knew that one day this would be her faith. If this was the purpose of her birth.

She doesn't take the hand. It seems there was still some hope left, it is extinguished now.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The school day had been easy she's been hiding her abuse for years, no teacher had ever suspected a thing and she didn't even blame them. It would just be bothersome, her father was a powerful man there wouldn't be much they could do.

She slaps on a smile, allowing herself to be dragged around by Su-ah and Ju-Kyung, listening as they giggle about their boyfriends chiming in the appropriate moments to not seem disinterested or jealous. She is jealous though, of their freedom and innocent problems, she'd lost her innocence a long time ago.

She knows Seojun is trying to talk to her but she can't handle seeing him right now, having to face someone who knows what she's going through sounds worst than being beat right now. So she jolts at every sight of the tall lanky figure, thankful for his fan club who seems to announce his every arrival. She's on her way to having a successful day when everything goes to hell.

She's in the bathroom drying her hands when a classmate comes in, responding to the small talk she answers the girl's question before nodding her head in goodbye.

"Oh your tag is sticking out."

That's all she hears before a hand is brushing across her sore beaten neck and her reaction is instantaneous, she turns around catching the offending hand and twisting it.

Her throat wheezes out, "Don't touch me."

The girl stares at her wide-eyed before tugging her hand away, then other girls begin to come of the stalls to see what's happening and before she knows it she's hyperventilating on the ground, nonsensical words dripping off her tongue. Everything is too loud and her head is splitting in half just when her vision is graying out, she smells a familiar perfume.

"Su-jin ah, you're going to be okay. Just breathe with me, follow me."

Ju-Kyung's voice is calming and sure, not touching her but covering them both in her sweater as she models how to breathe, she follows until her lungs are no longer burning.

"Good. You're doing so good, is it okay if I touch you? I'm going to help you up."

She grabs at the bathroom wall yanking herself until she's upright, trying to show her friend that she's not that weak but a look of hurt is displayed on her face and Sujin doesn't comprehend why.

The other girl shakes it off though, now covering her fully with her cornflower yellow sweater.

She's suddenly reminded of her nightmare this morning as she has to pass all the students in the hallway, all pointing and laughing as she falls apart some of them even have their phone out recording her and she sways uneasily before catching herself, trembling the whole way she walks down the hallway until a loud bang and a voice she recognizes all too well silences the uproar.

Resisting the desire to look back she allows Ju-Kyung to pull her up the stairs until they're on the roof. Air pumps into her lungs as she's finally free of all the judgmental eyes.

She expects the other girl to start interrogating her the moment the door closes but it never comes, instead Ju-Kyung places her sweater around her trembling body.

"You're okay. Just keep breathing."

She does her best to follow the uncomplicated directions.

After a few minutes, Ju-Kyung's phone suddenly rings disturbing the quietude. She barely hears blood rushing in her ears like the waves at the beach.

"Okay we're on the roof."

She stills at that utterance, turning in alarm.

"Who was that? Who did you tell where we are?"

Ju-Kyung looks guilty, as if she wasn't meant to hear that conversation. She doesn't want to see anyone right now, can barely stand to be with herself.

"Call them back and tell them not to come. I want to be alone."

Ju-Kyung holds her phone in her hands gingerly staring at the screen, clearly contemplating what is the right decision. She almost lunges for the phone to see who is the most recent call, but it's not needed as the roof door slams open.

"Why are you here?" She shouts, walking away now furious that tears are already filling her eyes now just at the sight of him.

"Nice to see you too princess." He drawls back, following her further onto to roof.

"Will you two be okay? I have to go back to class."

She spins to glare at her friend, why would she leave her alone with Seojun? They have had any interaction at school that hasn't been antagonistic.

"Yes, we need to talk." He answers for them and that's enough to make Ju-Kyung nod before walking off with a smile in her direction. The door shuts loudly behind her retreating back, Sujin wants to chase after her. Instead she turns back to him spitting fire and poison.

"I told you to mind your business."

"Are you okay?" He counters, eying her like a wild animal who can bolt at any minute, he isn’t wrong.

"That's none of your business!"

His expression remains the same, those beguiling feline eyes that scream at her.

"How hurt are you?"

Her emotions come crashing down again. He just keeps pushing and picking at her, no matter how much she shouts and shoves him away he just won’t go away like everyone else did. What is wrong with him? Couldn’t he see that she was more trouble than she was worth?

"What do you want to hear, huh? That everything hurts, that he used a belt this time! Do you want to hear about how he beat me until I bleed! Why do you care what happens me, why won't you leave me the fuck alone!"

Sobs ravage her body, she keeps brushing the fiery tears away fighting with her emotions but they won't stop and her palms are wet from covering her face, her breath is hitching until she starts hiccupping uncontrollably and she starts to feel light-headed.

"Hey! Su-jin! Breathe!"

But she can't, she doesn't remember how. Her body only knows how to hurt.

"Breathe, damnit!" Despite his shout, she hears the slight quiver in his voice but she can't discern why it's there but it desperately makes her want to obey.

When he cups her head, staring her head on she feels the vine wrapped around her lungs shrivel up and air starts gushing in until she feels dizzy, she sways back and forth gravity now also working against her and then she's being reeled in, her head placed on his chest. The thumping of his heart lulls her into a meditative state, she starts to count the beats and before she knows it the cobwebs in her head subside. Embarrassed by their sudden closeness, his arms are still by his side now almost immediately retracting from her head but she can feel his warmth radiating onto the skin of her thighs, she begins to draw back.

"Just stay. It's helping."

She blisters at his words, preparing to push him away.

"It's helping me, seeing you like that....it scared me. I helped you the other night, you should return the favor."

She puffs up before deflating, she'll never admit it but this is helping having something else to focus on, his scent, his heartbeat, the way his chest expands and constricts with every breath. The buzz of their skin nearly touching, his deep voice rumbling through his chest and into her ears, all placating and soothing her worries away.

"Fine."

She's never known Seojun to stay still for this long after years of attending the same school, always bursting with kinetic energy so she's pleasantly surprised by how long he simply stands and lets her rest on his chest, neither of them saying a word.

She stiffens when he suddenly starts moving disturbing their stillness, she sees his hands balled into tight fists by his side and wonders what's going through his mind.

"You can't go back there."

This again, she starts to remind him that she has nowhere to g--

"Stay with me."

#true beauty #true beauty kdrama #kang sujin #han seojun #the couple that should have been #timeline is around recent episodes just minus ALL of the bullshit #sujin is a good girl and I won't hear anything else #can't wait to make her smile

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cumholland · 5 years ago

Text

Neighbors Part 2

Chapter Two - Designed for You

(Tom Holland x Reader)

a/n: Thank you so much to everyone who loved the first chapter and asked for a second one! Also thank you again to @2018shawn for helping me come up with the idea and @moonshineholland for proofreading! Chapter 1 here

Summary: After a wrench is thrown into your relationship, will you and Tom be able to handle it or will it force you apart? WC: 9.6k

Warnings: Language, LOTS of smut, angst.

"I knew it!" Hannah screams into the phone. You had finally told her about the Tom situation after mulling over it for a couple of days. Now you were sitting in Tom's sun lounger by the pool. He was out shooting today but you decided to let yourself in to go for a swim and keep Tessa company. The last time you were over Tom had given you a spare key. Invited you to come at any time you pleased. He especially encouraged you to keep Tessa company as he worried about leaving her alone for too long. After taking for her for a walk, Tessa decided it was time for a much needed nap. With her asleep, you decided to catch up on tanning as well as catch up Hannah on your predicament.

"Don't get too excited, nothing has really happened since then." Ever since that steamy make out session with Tom, the two of you hadn't really talked about it. Tom's hands were all over you for the rest of the night traveling up and down your body, his lips all over your neck. You even fell asleep in his arms, not moving from the couch until almost three in the morning. Eventually, Tessa jumped on the couch, waking you both. Tom headed to bed as he needed to prepare for shooting the next day and you spent the rest of the night back home. Since then you had hung out with Tom once, only having dinner and watching a movie. Now, two days after making out with Tom, you weren't quite sure where he stood on the situation. "We haven't really acknowledged it, I guess," you explain to Hannah.

"Wait, so you're saying you had a lust filled night of passion and now you haven't porked his brains out yet?" Hannah never was one to put a filter on what she was thinking, but when it came to your love life she was especially honest.

You get up and pace around the pool, concrete hot against your bare feet. "It wasn't a lust filled night of passion, Hannah," you start. "All we did was make out. Maybe I'm a bad kisser and that's why he hasn't tried to make another move."

"No way!" Hannah exclaims. "Boys are horndogs, they could be kissing a corpse and still be into it."

"Gross," you interrupt. "Tom isn't like any other guys I've met, Han. He's really sweet and caring and he gets totally flustered any time we get flirty." That was a fact. Tom's face could turn red faster than the blink of an eye, as could yours. Neither of you had been particularly proficient when it came to the art of flirting, but you had mastered the art of making eyes at each other from across the room. It felt like both of you were holding back, and you weren't sure when that dam was going to break. You were almost certain it had when you finally kissed, but maybe not after all.

A bark pulls you from your thoughts. Your head whips back to the house and you see Tessa standing at the back door wanting to join you outside. You jog over to the door and let her out. "What is that?" Hannah asks. "Do I hear a dog?"

"It's Tessa." You had told Hannah about the situation with Tom but you had also left out the part about the spare key, meaning you hadn't told her you were at his house at this very moment either.

"Who's Tessa? Am I being replaced as your best friend?" Hannah says sarcastically. Tessa dances around your feet, whining for attention.

"Han, it's Tom's dog, you literally met her when you came over." You pat Tessa on the head before she takes off.

"Oh yeah... I would have remembered her name if she wasn't asleep the whole time I was there!" she pesters.

"She's a dog," you roll your eyes as if Hannah can see you. "Maybe if-"

"Hold the phone, you're at his house?" She interrupts. "Is he there? Are you about to bone? I'm so confused, please explain." Hannah's thoughts often ran a million miles a minute and today was no exception. You didn't mind though, she was just excited that your love life finally had a spark. You'd been hurt in the past and she knew you weren't the most open and willing when it came to dating. It made you happy that she was ecstatic for you, even when she was a little cavalier about it.

"No, he's on set today. I'm just hanging out with Tessa and sunbathing. He gave me a spare key, it isn't a big deal." It wasn't a big deal, really, but you knew Hannah could go on about that one for hours. "I'm just hanging out here until he's back and then maybe I'll try to talk to him about the - uh - incident."

"You mean your tongue down his throat? That incident?" She pesters.

"Yes, that one," you say, rolling your eyes. You settle onto the sun lounger again, just now noticing Tessa digging around in the garden. "Tess! Get out of there, I'm not giving you another bath today."

"I wanna hear whatever details you have after tonight," Hannah insists. "And we need to hang out soon, I miss you."

"I promise, Han, we'll hang out soon." You tuck your phone under the cushion and pull out your sunscreen to apply another layer, but the only thing on your mind is what you want to say to Tom when he's back.

When Tom finally arrives back home it's almost 10 pm. You spent the rest of the afternoon working on homework while Tessa kept herself occupied with a toy. You fed her at dinnertime and made yourself a sandwich. Waiting for Tom made the minutes feel like hours, each one dragging longer than the last. You were antsy for him to come back, but at least the longer it took him to come back, the longer you could put off talking to him about your feelings.

That kiss had left you reeling, even more so than you thought it would. After confessing to Hannah, the scene kept replaying in your head. Every time you forced it out of your mind, that feeling of Tom's hands on your bare skin would pull you back in and you'd be caught up daydreaming about the way his tongue had slid into your mouth. Your hand is gripping your thigh, heat building between your legs just thinking about it. You bury your head in your hands and rub your eyes as if you can rub away the thoughts of Tom in your head. Before you get too caught up again you hear the sound of the garage door opening. Tom's home.

Tessa makes a break for the door and whines until Tom finally opens it. He's got a big bag of takeout in his hands and heads straight for the kitchen, Tessa still sniffing and dancing around his shoes. "I didn't think you'd still be here," he calls over from the island. You make your way from the living room to the kitchen, joining him in the brightly lit room.

"I would've made you dinner if I had known what time you were gonna be back but I wasn't sure." You had texted Tom earlier in the day but he hadn't responded until he was already done on set for the day. By then you had already eaten dinner and you didn't even have time to prep anything for him anyway.

"That's alright love, I was in the mood for shitty takeout anyway." You try to smile but you just scrunch up your mouth instead. All that confidence you had about confronting Tom melts away at the sight of him. He looks a little disheveled, probably just from a long day of work. It seems almost silly now, like bringing up the situation would just annoy him. You decide to bite your tongue and keep it to yourself for now. What's waiting until he has a day off? It wouldn't hurt anything.

Tom looks tired and a little annoyed so you want to be out of his space. "Um, I think I'm just gonna go, I'll let you have some peace and quiet," you say. It was probably nothing, but you wanted to give him his privacy, this was his house after all. "I was just keeping Tessa company anyway."

"You should stay," Tom says abruptly. He doesn't look up from his food, twirling the lo mein around with his fork.

"Are you sure?" You ask, testing the waters. "I don't mind going, I have some homework to do anyway." That was a lie, but if it makes Tom feel better, it made you feel better.

"It was just a long day. The director was really pushing me and I was getting frustrated. It isn't a big deal," Tom explains. He finally looks up at you, the bags under his eyes dark. "You don't have to stay if you don't want to." Tom's eyes are dark and heavy, lids almost swollen. It just now registers that he might've been crying. Frustrated at the very least.

"I know," you say softly, almost whispering. You stop for a minute, looking him up and down. His eyes are trained on his food, his usual cheery demeanor almost entirely absent. He tosses a noodle down and Tessa gobbles it up.

"I'll share my lo mein if you stay," Tom murmurs, finally looking up from his food. You let out a soft chuckle and take a seat next to Tom. He passes over his fork to you and for the first time since he got home, a smile appears on his face. It's a gentle half-smile, but a smile nonetheless. You twirl some noodles onto the fork and bring it to your mouth.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" You ask through a mouthful of noodles.

Tom just shakes his head. "I'd rather hear about what my two girls did today." Tessa's ears perk up at that. She pretends to look to the side away from Tom, pretending like she isn't begging for food.

"Well, it was a pretty relaxed day," you start. "I swam in the pool for a bit and did my homework. Tess tore up another toy." You nod over to the living room, stuffing from the toy littering the ground.

"I'm starting to think you're just using me for my pool," Tom jokes.

"Of course! I don't know what else you thought this was," you joke, hitting his shoulder. "My friend Hannah thinks it's weird, me being at your house all day."

"It is weird," Tom affirms. "It isn't really the most typical of friendships, but I like you, so why not hang out with you instead of being alone? Same goes for Tess, I'm sure she's a lot happier not being alone all day." The statement dances around in your head for a moment. Specifically the word 'friendship' along with 'I like you' storms around in your head. Thomas was good at a lot of things but sending mixed signals was maybe his best talent. "Do you think if I lay on the ground Tess will walk on my back and give me a massage? I'm sore as fuck from stunts today."

"Um," you chuckle, eyebrows scrunched together. "Yeah, I'm not quite sure she's capable of doing that." You let that linger in the air for a moment before blurting out "I could give you a massage, maybe. If you want or whatever?" "Yeah?" He asks, eyes finally meeting yours. "I'll take what I can get."

"Really?" You accidentally blurt. It wasn't like you didn't want to do it but you didn't expect him to actually take you up on it.

"What? Are you too shy?" He cracks. "We've already made out, I hardly think a massage is that scandalous." Your cheeks immediately flush with red, your palms becoming sweaty. This is the first time he's mentioned the make out incident since it happened. He doesn't even look phased as he continues to scarf down the noodles.

"I guess you're right," you hum, fingertips buzzing from the thought of touching Tom. You leave Tom at the island and go back to the living room, Tessa following behind you. You move the coffee table out of the way and set up a blanket and pillow for Tom to lay on.

Tom joins you in the living room, setting his takeout on the coffee table you pushed aside. "Nice set up," he says, examining the space you have laid out. He takes his shirt off and tosses it on to the couch and lays down on the floor on his stomach. Your eyes are like saucers. You had expected this to be a 'through the clothes' kind of massage but you weren't about to ask him to get dressed. You eye him up and down, eyes raking over his back muscles down to the Calvin Klein waistband peeking out from his jeans. Before you even touch him Tessa has gotten up from her bed and is now trying to lick Tom's face off. "Tess!" Tom whines. He gets up and takes her out back, shutting the door so the two of you will be uninterrupted. Tom is back on his stomach so you wordlessly drop to your knees by his side. The tips of your fingers meet his skin, warm and firm. You slowly move your hands up his spine, slowly palming his tense back. You feel him laugh under your hands. "Your hands are so cold, darling," he teases.

"Give it a minute," you say, lightly slapping his back and pretending to hit him. Your hands continue across his shoulders, where he is most tense. Your thumbs dig into the muscle, and Tom moans under you. You dig your thumbs into the same spot again.

"Fuck," he moans again. "You can go harder, I won't break I promise." You weren't exactly trying to be gentle, but it was hard to put your weight into it when you were arched over his side.

"Okay," you start "I just have to...," you trail off as you swing your leg over his waist and you're now straddling him. Tom lets out a soft laugh, but you don't acknowledge it. Now with better leverage, you dig back into his shoulders. Tom's smile is wiped off his face and is replaced with a look of ecstasy as he lets out a long moan.

"Shit," Tom gasps through another moan. "What did you just hit?"

"I guess you have a g-spot in your shoulders." This makes the both of you laugh. You bring your hands down to his shoulder blades and start massaging the muscle that surrounds the area. Tom had some bruising on his back from his stunt work so you didn't want to get too rough with him. Tom moans into the pillow, this time lower and drawn out. "Geez, I hope the neighbors don't hear this, it sounds quite sexual."

"It's better than sex," Tom mutters.

"Oh?"

"Not really, but it's a close second." He turns his head and looks back at you over his shoulder giving you that killer smile. You work your hands lower again, reaching the small of his back. "Am I getting an ass massage too? My glutes are sore from all the running I had to do on set today."

"In your dreams, Holland," you roll your eyes.

"Fine, fine, what about a happy ending?" Tom starts laughing before he can even finish his joke.

"Once again, in your dreams," you tease him, although for a second it crosses your mind that something like that might be in your dreams too. You massage all the way down Tom's back and all the way up to the top again. After about a half hour of massaging Tom, you finally crawl off his back and sit on the floor next to him. Tom's eyes are closed and he's half asleep from the relaxing massage. "Alright, my fingers are about to fall off." Tom slowly flips over onto his back. Your eyes dart to the bulge in his jeans. He isn't totally hard, but he at least has a semi. He doesn't seem to notice or acknowledge it as he rubs his eyes. "What? Only the back side? What about the front?" He teases again.

"You're not getting a happy ending!" You exclaim.

"That isn't even what I meant," Tom says through his grin. "My chest is sore from pull ups and I paid for the full experience!" You shoot him a confused look. "I gave you lo mein, duh."

"Tom, I had like two bites!"

"Yeah! One bite for the back and one for the front!" Tom takes your hand and brings it to his chest.

"Have I told you that you're annoying?" You badger him, caving in to his request. With your hands on his chest, you move your palms in slow circular motions, hands traveling from his chest to his shoulders. You can feel Tom looking at you so you meet his gaze. With Tom facing you everything feels a lot more intimate. You feel every inch of your skin connected to his, the heat radiating from his body to your hands. Tom licks his lips and all you can think about is kissing them again. Before you even know what you're doing you're crawling on top of him and straddling him again. "Um... leverage," is all you can stutter out. Your cheeks are flushed pink but so are Tom's. His eyes travel down your body before slowly grazing back up. Your eyes meet again. Your hands are on his chest, legs around his waist. You're riding him.

Well, sort of. You can feel his bulge pressed against your ass now, straining against his jeans. His hands come up to your waist, taking a firm hold on you. Without a second thought, you bring your face to his, lips crashing again his. Tom captures your bottom lip with his teeth, teasing you before slipping his tongue into your mouth. He traces over your lips before gliding his tongue over yours, flicking against you. Your kisses become needier, filled with lust and desire. Your noses bump together, trying to melt into one another as deep as you can go. Tom pulls your body flush against him, every part of you now rubbing together. Tom's hands explore your back, hands traveling up the back of your shirt. You bring your hands to his face, capturing his strong jaw. Tom consumes you, surrounds you with himself. From his hands on you to his tongue tracing your teeth, you feel yourself falling into him. His breath is warm, spilling into your mouth, his mouth now traveling down your neck. Tom moans against your neck, his guttural groans sending shivers down your spine, you can feel yourself getting wet. You gasp, fingers catching in Tom's hair, slowly grinding your body against his. You bring your lips to his about to press them against his again but then...

Both of you hear a whining followed by a bark. Tessa wants back inside. "She'll be fine," Tom says, his lips returning to your neck.

"No, it's fine, we don't make her stay outside. It's not like there aren't other places we can make out," you say as you get off of him, standing up. "Besides, when was the last time you even vacuumed?"

"Not since I moved in," Tom says as you go to the back door to let Tessa in. She trots into the living room, ignoring Tom and going straight for the lo mein, burying her nose in the takeout container. "Tess!" Tom chides her. "No, nasty!" Tom drags her by the collar away from the food. You can't help yourself but giggle at how things went from you on top of Tom to Tessa stealing his food. "Go on, go put yourself in timeout!" Tessa's head hangs as she slowly walks up the stairs.

"Aw, c'mon Tom she just wanted a bite! Plus you deserve it, you locked her outside."

"Whatever," Tom says as he rolls his eyes, taking his food to the trash can to throw away. Finally, with a moment to breathe, you check your phone. It's nearing midnight and you have some work to get done tomorrow.

"I should probably get going, I have to be up in the morning and it's getting a bit late." Tom looks at you with those puppy dog eyes that he has perfected but all he does is nod. He walks you to the door and gives you a soft kiss on the cheek.

"Will I see you tomorrow?" He asks.

"Yeah, sure," you smile at him before returning the kiss, this time on his lips. "See you tomorrow, Tom."

The next day it was around 7:30 pm and the sun was already beginning to set. After a long day of working from your computer, you were ready to throw in the towel. After taking a bath, you decide to text Tom and ask if he is almost home from set. It isn't until 9:00 pm when he finally responds. Just got home. Come over. Without a second thought, you get dressed and walk over to his house. As soon as your knuckles meet the dark wood of his front door, it opens to Tom's face, brightly lit with a smile. "Miss me?" Tessa comes running out the front door and sniffing at your feet.

"Tessa clearly missed me," you say, flashing a smile back at Tom.

"I missed you more," he says as he moved out of the doorframe and motions for you to come in.

"Were things easier on set today?" After how run down he looked the other day, you were hoping he was still feeling okay after another long day.

"Not too bad. Nothing a genius like me can't handle," he says as he ruffles his hair.

"I guess that explains why your head is so big."

"What!" Tom shouts, cocking his head at you. Tom grabs you around the shoulders and starts messing up your hair.

"I'm kidding, you dork!" You tell him, grabbing a hold of his arm, all too aware of the muscles underneath his soft skin. Tom releases you from his strong grasp. "Your head is perfectly average sized."

"Thank you!"

"Your ego on the other hand," you start. Tom's eyes widen again, ready to lunge at you. "Kidding again!"

"You better be," he jokes, pulling you in close again. This time his hands are wrapped around your waist, head tilted over yours. He brings his face to yours, closing the distance, lips meeting again. So this is what you were now? Intimate. More than friends. Nothing was set in stone, making you all the more nervous. You move your lips against his, falling into his kiss once again. Once you pull away you smile at him, but Tom can tell there's something off about the look on your face. "Is everything okay?" He asks, hands falling off your waist.

"I just... um," you start, shaking your head. "I hate to sound so cliche but what are we?"

"Friends?" Tom says, a confused look on his face. You return the confused look back.

"Just friends?" "Well, um, special friends," Tom clarifies. Clarifies in a way that clarities absolutely nothing. You take a step away from him.

"What does that mean exactly?" You look deep in to Tom's eyes. It's hard to tell what he's thinking.

He's wearing his glasses today making him look cute as ever. His hands are pulled tight by his sides, clearly showing he's a little on edge. "I guess I don't know exactly." Tom leans against the counter, putting a little more space between the two of you. "I just...," Tom trails off. "I can't really be in a relationship right now."

"What? Why?" You demand, the edge in your voice all too clear. You don't mean to sound pushy or even sound angry, but having your emotions toyed with is something you've never put up with. Knowing your worth has always been important to you and you didn't like to play games. You and Tom had been flirty from the start, so there was obviously something between you. In a matter of seconds, every interaction you've had with Tom flies through your head, analyzing everything from mixed signals, missed opportunities, to your especially erotic massage make out session last night. Had you missed something? What weren't you getting? What wasn't Tom getting?

Tom's mouth hangs open for a second as he tries to articulate what he's thinking. The seconds stretch out in front of you, feeling like years. "I'm not gonna be here forever," he starts. "I'm constantly going back and forth between places. In two months, once I'm done with this shoot, I'll be back in London for who knows how long." You feel the ground start shifting under you as Tom talks. Tom, the guy you had been slowly developing feelings for no matter how hard you tried not too. Tom, the guy who was jaw droppingly gorgeous and the sweetest gentleman you've ever met. Tom, the guy who didn't want to date you.

You try to muster up a response but you have no idea what to say. Now it's your turn for your mouth to hang up. "I guess I don't know what to say." "You don't have to say anything," Tom says, closing the distance between you, wrapping his arms around you again. "Why do we even need to have a label on it? Why can't we just enjoy each other's company? I've loved spending time with you and I don't want that to change."

"But...," you start.

"But I just can't have a relationship right now, love." Tom places a kiss on your forehead. I have to be a million places all over the world as soon as press for my next movie starts. It would just make it harder on both of us and I can't do that to you. I can't promise you something when I know it isn't going to work out." You do your best to suppress rolling your eyes. After all this time of being a total gentleman, now he wants to be a fuckboy like every other guy in California? Hannah would definitely be hearing about this later.

"Sure," you say bluntly. You were irritated and you just wanted the conversation to be over. If Tom didn't want a girlfriend then fine, you wouldn't push the envelope, but you wouldn't let him play with your emotions either.

"Please, don't be mad at me-"

"I'm not," you interrupt. "I guess I'm just disappointed. Let's just drop it." You cross your arms and lean against the counter.

Tom crosses his arms too and stays silent for a moment. "I'm sorry," he mumbles. "I can't lead you on I couldn't keep that from you."

"It's fine," you reiterate. "It's whatever. I'm glad you told me." You really were glad he told he told you. Glad you could keep yourself from getting more hung up on him. You uncross your arms to keep yourself from looking too upset. "So what's the plan? Are you making me dinner or do I have to do everything around here?" There was a stillness and a comfort around you. Without worrying about a potential relationship you could just enjoy yourself, right?

Tom cracks a small smile of that, breaking through the troubled look on his face. "How about I buy you takeout instead." You jokingly roll your eyes, making fun of his inability to cook.

Friends. There was nothing wrong with friends. Watching Tom as he grabbed his phone to order food, you thought to yourself that there were plenty more fish in the sea.

"I don't think I'm understanding," Hannah ranted. You texted her as soon as you got back from Tom's and she immediately made plans to come over the next day. Now the two of you were laying in your room listening to music as you so often did before you started spending so much time at Tom's house.

You pull your blanket over your head, groaning into the soft covers. "I don't even know why I got so invested. I'm sorry I haven't been around as much, I shouldn't have let trying to get with Tom take up so much of my time."

"Don't say that!" Hannah asserts. "You're still in desperate need of dick and it doesn't always just come to you, you have to put in work for it sometimes!"

"But I didn't even get any!" You whine. "Besides that wasn't what I was going for! Haven't you ever heard of happily ever after?" "My happily ever after includes me getting good dick." While Hannah is talking you get up from your bed and go over to your bay window, sitting down on the cushions. "His dick isn't even off the table either, hun. I know it isn't exactly what you were hoping for but you don't have to go back to the nunnery just yet." "I think that's called a convent," you tease. Hannah always knew how to make you smile even when you were feeling down. Hannah sits up from the bed and joins you at the window. You look over at Tom's backyard to see him coming outside with a towel, about to go for a swim. "Listen, boys change up like the weather all the time. They never know what they want and they're always changing their minds. It doesn't matter if you and Tom aren't destined to be together, just have some fun." Hannah grabs your hands, pulling you close. "I know you're never satisfied with guys and they're always letting you down, but you've been the happiest hanging out with Tom than you have been in a while. You don't have to totally cut him out just because he's a little bit of a douche. We already knew that hun, he's a guy they're all dicks."

You let out a soft laugh and nod. Hannah had a point. She always did, she was too smart for her own good. "I'm not gonna tell you you're right because you already know you are."

"Of course I'm right, babes," Hannah says as she hugs you. "Have some fun, let loose! You practically wet yourself when you made out with him. It's up to you, hun, do whatever you want. Do you know what you want?"

You look out to Tom's yard and watch as he dives headfirst into the pool. Dating Tom might not be in your future, but there was obviously something between you. Did you know what you wanted?

You took a few days to yourself to think about your situation. Tom had been texting you but your responses were inconsistent and sporadic. He asked you to come over more than once but you told him you were busy or had plans with Hannah, which wasn't technically lying as Hannah had come over for a few nights to watch movies. Now, it was the weekend and you had spent most of the day laying in bed. Tom was at work but you had texted him and asked to come over later. He replied almost instantly with an absolutely. Tom didn't seem to be upset with you even though you pulled had a bit of a disappearing act. He could probably imagine how confused you had been over the past few days. But you weren't confused anymore. Tom was just a boy and you were just a girl. And you were just a girl wanting to let loose.

You found yourself in Tom's living room once more. Tom was on one side of the couch and you were on the other. It had felt a bit awkward since you had come over, but the conversation had been flowing as usual. You had fallen back into your typical poking fun at each other banter and Tom had put on some shitty horror movie. "Why do you always have to put on shitty movies like this, why can't we watch a good one?"

"Well if it's a shitty movie then we can make fun of it. We always end up talking over it anyway," he explains.

"Then why don't you put on music or something, dummy," you tease.

"Fine!" Tom caves in. He turns off the movie and pulls up Spotify on the TV, turning on one of his playlists. "Alright missy, you got your wish, now what do you want to talk about."

"First we can talk about how Chris Evans is so much hotter than you," you joke. Tom tosses a pillow at your face but you smack it out of the way before it hits you. "I'm kidding Mr. Holland, you're the hottest superhero."

"Damn right," Tom says, smile proud on his face. You roll your eyes at that.

Would now be a good time to ask him? runs through your head. You've thought about it for days now, so why pussy out? It's just a few simple words. "Tom, I...," you trailed off.

"Huh?"

"I, um... ," you started again. "Um, do you have any snacks?"

"Oh, uh, yeah," Tom says as he got up from the couch. He disappeared into the kitchen to grab whatever the fuck he thought you wanted. Shit was all you could think. You always froze up at the last second, always too scared to shoot your shot. After a minute, Tom came back with an assortment of snacks. He dropped the pile of snacks on the couch next to you and took a seat on the other side. "Plenty?" Tom asks as he digs his hand into a bag of chips.

"Yeah," you start again. "Actually, um, I meant to ask about the other day." Tom looks up from his chips, mouth full and his loud crunching distracting you. He doesn't interrupt, just keeps looking at you. "About the relationship thing..."

"Hun, I-"

"You're not looking for a relationship," you interrupt him. "That's fine, I know, but... why don't we just... have fun then?" Tom studies your face for a minute. His eyebrows are scrunched together and the look of confusion takes over his face.

"I'm sorry," he starts. "What exactly are you asking?"

Hannah's words fly through your head: just have fun. "Fun, like I said," you say, looking him in the eyes, his tight knit eyebrows slowly coming undone. "No strings attached."

"Friends with benefits?" Tom asks.

"Exactly," you explain. "You don't want a relationship and I don't want to get my feelings hurt. But that doesn't mean I'm not still... attracted to you." Tom keeps his eyes trained on you, watching you as he chews on his bottom lip. "You can say no, I'm just thinking out loud."

"Are you sure?" He asks. You weren't fully sure of yourself, but these days you often weren't. The world kept going even when you were standing still, so what was the point in waiting around to question yourself any longer?

"Yes," you blurt. "We have a good thing going for us already, I mean. And we're both adults with needs so... why not?" The silence hangs in the air for another moment, the atmosphere in the room warm and still. Your hands are clammy and your face is definitely on fire. You weren't often bold like this and it was a new sensation to you.

"Well then... why not?" Tom finally says. "I mean, I'm not exactly sure how to go about this I guess."

You weren't exactly sure how this would go either. Or even how it would start. "We can just let things happen organically and see what happens."

Tom nodded, tossing the bag of chips aside. "So we can make out now?" He looked like an eager kid in a candy store.

You laughed at him and rolled your eyes. "I said organically, Thomas."

After talking to Tom about the new aspects of your friendship, you decided to turn the shitty horror movie back on to fill the silence while you retreated into your thoughts. It was hard to tell what Tom was thinking and it made you more nervous that he might be thinking this was a bad idea. He seemed excited enough, but your doubts had a way of getting the better of you. You were so shrouded in your thoughts you hadn't even noticed the movie was over. "Not as shitty as the last one but still pretty shitty," Tom commented.

"I get to pick the movie next time," you declared.

Tom laid down on the couch, using your lap as a pillow. "My taste is immaculate, don't be jealous." You rolled your eyes at that one. "Have I ever told you how gorgeous you are?"

"I think so. Every night before I go to bed you tell me I'm gorgeous and the most important woman in the world," you pester him.

"No, that's Tess," he says laughing.

"Whatever," you roll your eyes.

"You are gorgeous though," he says again. "I know I've put you in a complicated situation and all, but you're the fittest girl I've ever met. You're stunning and you're way smarter than me."

"Clearly," you tease him again.

"And I'm not just complimenting you to get in your pants, I really mean it," Tom says. "I just... are you really sure about this?" Tom looks into your eyes. His eyes are soft in gentle. Everything about him is soft and gentle. He's so sweet and compassionate and caring that you start to feel your doubts melt away. Maybe you weren't making the right decision, but it was a decision that still made you happy. You push him off your lap and force him to sit up. Before he can say anything else, you press your lips against his. It's softer than your last kiss, this one more gentle and subdued. Your lips move in sync, pushing into one another, slow and passionate like you have all the time in the world. Tom runs his hands through your hair, pulling you into him.

Tom pulls back for a second to look at you. "Is this okay?" He asks, voice heavy with desire. You nod your head and lean back in, lips meeting his again. You deepen this kiss this time, slipping your tongue into his mouth. Tom's breathing is getting heavier by the second as the kiss becomes more intense. His hands find your waist, pulling you closer until he has you in his lap. You wrap your arms around his neck as you straddle him. Your tongue slides against his, teeth clashing as the kiss becomes sloppier. Tom pulls away again, this time his lips shiny and starting to redden from your lips hungrily attacking each other. "Should we take this upstairs?" His voice is low and gruff, saturated with lust. You try your best to formulate words but all you can is nod your head.

Tom leads you up the stairs. He brings you to his bedroom, which you haven't been in since the first night you came to Tom's house. He closes the door behind you and dims the lights, giving the room a soft, sensual glow. Tom backs you up against the edge of the bed and you let yourself fall back onto it. Tom crawls on top of you, kissing up your neck as he comes back to your lips.

Your hands find their way under his shirt, slowly traveling up his back. Tom breaks to kiss to take his shirt off, pulling it over his head. You watch as his abdomen muscles ripple as he moves before his mouth is all over yours again. You can already feel the heat building between your legs, the wetness forming as your desire for Tom burns like a wildfire. He kisses back down your neck to your collarbone until his lips meet the fabric of your shirt. "Can I take it off you?" He asks, looking up at you. His puppy dog eyes now taking a different form, something more raw and needy.

You sit up as Tom grabs the hem of your shirt, pulling it over top of your head. "I don't think I've ever told you how great your tits are," Tom teases.

"Shut up," you laugh, shaking your head at him. You unclasp your bra, letting it slide off your shoulders. Tom's mouth practically gapes at the sight of your bare breasts.

"Wow," is all he can muster. You giggle at him as you back your way to the top of the bed, Tom following right behind you. With you on your back, he crawls between your legs, wrapping them around his waist. He slowly grinds his body against yours and you can feel his erection through his sweatpants. You palm his bulge, feeling the harness through the fabric. Tom moans into your mouth as his tongue meets yours again, warm breaths exchanged between you. Tom begins to slide down, his bare skin against yours as he goes. He kisses a trail down your neck before choosing a spot to slowly lick and caress with his tongue, gently sucking in a way that will be sure to leave a mark. His hands find your breasts, taking a handful and slowly rubbing them and creating friction against your nipples. A gentle moan leaves your lips, giving Tom the green light to let him know that you love what he's doing. After he's satisfied with the mark he's left on your neck he lowers his face to your tits, his tongue finding the nipple. Tom gently begins to suck and graze his teeth of your sensitive nipples, now hard from Tom's work. This time you let out a louder moan, knotting your fingers into Tom's hair as his warm, wet tongue focuses on your erogenous zone. Tom moves to the other side, his tongue lashing at the tender skin, driving you crazy before you're even fully undressed.

"Fuck, Tom," you let out a breathy moan. He looks up at you, nipple in his mouth and lets out a low moan. You bite your lip at the sexy sight of him. While Tom is still working on you, you start to wiggle out of your pants, unbuttoning and unzipping them with one hand. Tom notices you struggling and helps slide them off of you. With his warm mouth gone, the cold air hits your skin where he has left it wet with his tongue.

With your pants gone, you're left only in your underwear, and Tom looks captivated by the sight. "You're so fucking sexy, love," Tom practically moans. He positions his head between your thighs and kisses each one, licking his way back up. His mouth meets the fabric of your panties and he lets out a hot breath that breaks through the thin fabric. By now you're practically soaked from anticipation, desperately aching to feel his tongue on you. Tom hooks his fingers across the fabric, moving it to the side without taking them off. He licks a tantalizing slow strip up your slit, his tongue finding it's way between your slit, enveloping him in your heat. "So fucking wet for me," he moans against you. Tom's mouth feels like heaven against you, his soft lips rubbing against you, his tongue working it's way in and out of you, gliding up and down your slit. Tom grabs your ass, slightly lifting you off the bed to slide your panties down to your ankles. He spreads your legs as far apart as he can before his head finds it's place between your legs again. His lips wrap around your clit, slowly licking against the nub before grazing his teeth against it. You involuntarily gasp for air and moan, throwing your head back against the pillow as your hips buck up against his tongue. You look back down to watch Tom as he gently assaults your clit with his tongue, eyes trained on you. "Keep your eyes on me," Tom murmurs against you.

"O-okay," you manage to get out between moans. It had been a while since a guy had gone down on you but this was already a million times better than you had ever had before. Tom lets out a gentle puff of air onto your sensitive, throbbing clit. You struggle to keep your eyes open, watching Tom as he expertly works every inch of you. Your hand finds it's way to his hair again, your fingers threading through his hair, keeping his head in place. Tom's head is moving up and down now, his tongue traveling over your soaked folds. Tom has one hand on your thigh keeping you spread open as he moves the other one to hover over your clit. As his head moves down further, his thumb takes the place of his tongue, now rubbing your clit in circles.

Tom moans against you again, sending deep vibrations into you that you feel in your core. "You taste so fucking good," he groans.

"Please, fuck, please," you moan. "More." Your hips are slowly bucking in rhythm with his tongue, your juices flowing from how turned on you are. "Fuck," you gasp. "Please... fingers." Tom wordlessly responds. He lifts his head up spitting onto your opening, saliva and your juices dripping from his lips. It's messy and sloppy and probably the hottest thing you've ever seen. Tom uses his spit and your wetness to easily slide his index finger inside you. "Fucking hell," you gasp. You sit up on your elbows to get a better view of Tom as his tongue travels back to your clit, as he buries a second finger inside you. "Tom, fuck!" You cry out. Tom curls his fingers inside you, pumping them in and out, quickly picking up the pace. The faster he goes, the more stars that start to appear in your vision. "Tom, I'm getting close," you warn. You feel your body begin to get warm all over, that pit of pleasure building in your stomach. Tom begins to pick up the pace of his fingering, his tongue lapping aggressively at your clit, swirling around it and gently biting it. "Fuck, fuck!" You scream as your body starts to fall to pieces. You feel your orgasm wash over you, starting in the pit of your stomach and reaching all the way to the tips of your toes and back up. A sob escapes your throat as your toes curl and the orgasm finished wracking through your body. "Holy shit, Tom, where'd you learn to do that?"

"Practice," he says, flashing that cheeky smile at you. Although this time he has your juices drenching his lips and chin. Tom comes up from beneath your legs, planting a wet kiss on your lips. You can taste yourself on his lips but that seems to only turn you on more.

You pull away and give him a devilish grin. "My turn?"

"You're naughty," he teases. "But absolutely," Tom crawls off of you and falls beside you on his back, putting a pillow behind him to prop himself up. His hard on is still raging through his sweatpants, a small patch of precum leaking through the grey fabric. Fuck, his bulge looks big. You run your hand across his bulge, palming at his hard member. Tom hooks his thumbs over his waistband and slides his sweatpants down, cock smacking against his stomach as it jumps out from his underwear. His cock is long and hard, precum dripping from the tip. His cock is red and straining, throbbing from how excited he is. Without hesitation, you grab his cock, slowly pumping the thick meat. You rub your thumb against the head, spreading the precum over it and dragging it down his shaft. "Fuck, baby," Tom moans, head falling back against the headboard. You tease his cock, jerking him off at a tantalizingly slow pace, letting the tension build.

After teasing him with your hand, you bring your mouth down to the head of his cock and flick your tongue against it. Tom lets out a breathy moan and tangles his fingers into your hair, pushing your head down with a bit of force. You take the head into your mouth, tongue finding the sensitive spot under the tip. Tom's cock was already hard but you felt it grow rock hard in your mouth, his pre cum leaking into your mouth now, hot and salty. You bob your head up and down, opening your throat up for him. "Your mouth feels so fucking good," Tom pants, thrusting his hips up into your mouth. You grab his balls, slowly tugging at them and working them around with your fingers until his cock is buried entirely down your throat. Tears escape your eyes but you keep yourself from gagging, pulling off his cock. You lick a stripe up his shaft and back down, taking a second to play with his balls in your mouth, tongue traveling around his sack. You take his cock down into your mouth again and he thrusts up into your throat. Tom pushes you down further onto his cock, fucking your mouth. You gag a couple of times before you get the hang of it, but once you do Tom is thrusting into your throat with ease.

Tom's breathing is heavy and labored as he breaks out into a sweat. He raises up his hand, bringing it down on your ass, causing a loud smack, leaving a red hand print on your ass. "Open your legs for me, baby," he commands. You do as he says and he leans forward so he can reach you, his long fingers finding their way in your slit again. He collects your wetness and brings it to your mouth. You open up for him and taste yourself on him, your tongue dancing around his fingers. You moan onto his fingers before he pushes you back down onto his cock again. He leans forward again, this time his fingers meeting your entrance, sliding into you to the knuckle. He fingers you fast and rough, the sounds of your wetness turning him on even more.

"I can't take it any longer I need to be inside you now," Tom demands, standing up on the bed as you pull off of his cock. "Get on your hands and knees." You do as he says, positioning yourself on the edge of the bed. He gets on his knees, his face in line with your dripping pussy. He buries his face in it, tongue licking it's way through your folds, making you gasp and scream with pleasure.

"Fuck!" You moan, burying your face into his duvet. "Tom, it feels so fucking good!" As you're gasping into the pillow, Tom gets up from his knees and lines the head of his cock up with your entrance, slapping his head against your soaked folds. You bite your lip and push your hips back against him, begging to feel the fullness of his cock inside you.

Tom teases you with his cock, holding your hips in place, making you wait and beg for him to give you what you want. "You want more?" All you can muster is a moan as you push against him harder. He slides the head inside you, slowly opening up your entrance. "So fucking tight."

"Oh, fuuuck!" You cry out, mouth hanging open as he slides another inch inside. He slides in until he's halfway in and you can feel yourself stretching around him, the heat of your tight walls adjusting to his size. "Tom, please," you hiss. "More, please." Tom adheres to your begs, sliding in the rest of his cock with a quick, hard stroke, balls slapping against you. "Ah, fuck, Tom!" You moan, gasps and hisses falling from your mouth. You try to form a sentence, tell him you love it, tell him it feels fucking amazing, tell him his cock is bringing you the most pleasure you've ever felt, but all you can muster is garbled moans and cries.

Tom starts pumping in and out of you, faster and faster, his hips slapping against yours. You can feel his cock throbbing inside you, his rhythm steady and consistent as he fills you up. Tom grabs you by the hair and pulls you up, your bodies flush against each other. He buries his face in your neck, licking and sucking on the mark he already left on you, the skin still sensitive from the earlier assault. Tom's hand travels down to your now easily accessible clit, his index and middle finger rubbing in circles in time with the rhythm of his thrusts. "You're so fucking wet... dripping down my cock," Tom grunts through gritted teeth. "Fucking hell, your pussy was made for me."

Tom pulls out of you and spins you around then pushes you back on the bed. He crawls between your legs and lifts them onto his shoulders, centering his cock with your entrancing and sliding his entire length back into with a resounding thrust. "Fuck!" You cry out, grabbing hold of his arms, feeling the veins that wrap around his muscles under the soft skin. Tom immediately picks the pace back up, the bed squeaking and shaking from the ferocity of his fucking.

"Play with yourself, I wanna see you touch your clit while I'm fucking you," Tom orders. Your hand flies down to your clit, fingers toying with yourself. It feels even better with him inside you, every thrust sending a shockwave to your core.

You throw your head back, letting your body succumb to the pleasure. "Tom! Fuck I can't...," you trail off. You try to warn Tom that he's getting you close, bringing you closer to the edge with every thrust, but the pleasure has left you unable to form words. Tom brings your legs down from his shoulders and wraps them around his waist. Tom lays his body across yours, bare skin rubbing against bare skin, gliding over the other from sweat. Tom wraps one arm behind your head, bringing your face together, lips meeting as he buries his cock deep inside you, the head rubbing against your sweet spot as he slowly grinds his hips against yours, hitting that spot deep inside you over and over. "Tom!" You moan into his mouth. You feel the pressure building in your stomach each time he buries himself deeper. You grab his hand from your waist and push it to your clit, begging him to give you your release. Tom gets the memo and starts to rub your clit in circles with the rough pad of his thumb.

"Such a dirty girl for me," he moans into your mouth. You feel your body start to convulse. You grab on to his shoulders, your walls closing in around him. Tom picks up the pace of his thrusting, burying his cock as deep inside you as he can, working on your clit harder, collecting your wetness on his fingers to use on your clit.

"Tom," you gasp. "Fuck, don't stop!" Your hips buck and your legs shake, Tom hitting your sweet spot as you feel the pressure release. The pleasure washes over you, your mouth hanging open as guttural moans escape your mouth. You close your eyes, stars swirling around your vision as you feel your orgasm reaching it's peak. Tom knows what he's doing to you and he's loving every second, feeling your walls tighten on his cock, feeling your body shake in his hands as he pushes you over the point of no return. You buck your hips onto his cock, riding out the waves of your orgasm as you start coming down.

Tom gives you a few more thrusts before he grunts in your ear, his thrusts becoming short and hard as his body tenses up. He lets out a final groan before his pulsing cock begins to spurt his ribbons of cum inside you, holding your hips steady as he realizes inside you. "Fuck!" He grunts through gritted teeth. "Fucking hell," he moans, pumping inside you, his spent cock throbbing and twitching, fucking the cum out of you, letting it drip from your opening. Tom's mouth meets yours again, tongues intertwining as you pant and moan into each other's mouths, hardly able to move from how spent the both of you are.

Breathing heavy, the air hot and sticky, Tom is the first to break the post-orgasm silence. "I can't even remember the last time I came that hard," he smiles, breaking out into a laugh.

You bury your head into your hands, hiding your face from him. "So we really did that, huh?" You peek out through your fingers to see him flash that cheeky grin at you. You start laughing and shaking your head. "Such a dork."

"A dork who made you cum harder than you ever have before," he teases, leaving one final kiss to your neck. You roll your eyes at that, even though it was the truth.

Tom gets up from the bed to grab a towel from the bathroom. He turns on the shower before coming back, placing a towel beside you. "So," he starts. "Again tomorrow?"

"Obviously," you giggle, flashing him a devilish smile. Oh boy, what had you gotten yourself into?

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