#For real I cannot tell you how much help Cass was - I rewrote this from scratch at least twice

[kindahoping4forever]

Watch Me Bloom: A Few Months Ago // Ashton Irwin

I’m so excited to finally share this with everyone! As I mentioned, the week leading up to Superbloom really inspired me. It was so hard to believe that just seven months prior, we were living the ups and downs of CALM’s release while this was a essentially a never ending parade of self-reflection and joy. My fic Release explored a relationship dealing with CALM and I thought it’d be fun to see what the Superbloom experience might look like thru the lens of a relationship. (I wouldn’t say it’s a sequel - in my mind, they’re different relationships- but you could call it a thematic companion.)

As always (but honestly even more so this time because omg this section especially changed again and again), my eternal love and gratitude to @cal-puddies​​ for always offering direction, notes, encouragement and a good roast when I need it.

Warnings: What a surprise, it’s Boyfriend!Ash. Brief quarantine mention. So much fluffy smut you’ll wonder if I’m alright. Oral sex performed on a female. Unprotected sex within an established relationship. This is the tame chapter, folks. The calm before the smutty storm, if you will.

Word Count: 3319

Watch Me Bloom Masterlist

Masterlist // Taglist // Ko-Fi

Let  me  know  what  you  think!

You sleepily roll over to snuggle your boyfriend but instead of being surrounded by the warm firmness of Ashton’s back, you feel cool air and the beginnings of a falling sensation. Your body jolts awake to catch itself, your brain making the unpleasant discovery that there’s no one laying next to you and you’re about to tumble off the couch. You shake your head upon realizing you once again fell asleep in the living room, watching TV.

It was a bad habit you fell into once Ashton got busy with his new project. You still hadn’t gotten used to falling asleep without him and a part of you can’t help but long for the early days of quarantine, when you spent the majority of your time lazily wrapped up in sheets and each other.

But as time went on, you started waking up alone and finding him sitting outside with a coffee, scribbling away on a notepad. Other days you’d wake up to the sounds of him already in the shower, singing gibberish words to fill out gorgeous melodies he dreamt of and is trying to perfect while he gets ready to take on the day.

He eventually showed those scribbles and shower songs to his housemate, Matt, who helped him shape them into demos, which they then decided to make into fully produced tracks. After weeks of rearranged furniture, strewn about instruments and dodging cables running through the hall, Ash gleefully shared that he planned to release these songs as his own album. You’d kissed him happily, shared in his joy and teased him relentlessly that it took him this long to tell you. You couldn’t have been happier for him and you loved seeing him excited about work again, especially after the frustration surrounding the band's album release earlier this year, but every night when you go to bed alone, you just miss him.

You shuffle into the kitchen and dump the rest of your long forgotten tea in the sink, turning on the tap to wash the cup. While you wait for the water to warm up, you cartoonishly stretch your arms over your head and loudly yawn.

“Long day?” A voice asks from across the room.

You chuckle and turn to greet Matt, who’s headed towards the sink with an armful of various mugs he and Ashton must’ve used for tea, coffee and water over the course of the day.

“Well, I got up earlier than usual and Ash had already made his side of the bed, so I’m sure it was nowhere near as long as yours,” you comment, reaching out to take the dishes from him.

He silently thanks you with a kind smile. “Yeah he was up and at it even before me today,” he admits, shaking his head. “Had quite the breakthrough today, though. I’m sure he’d love to tell you about it if you wanna pay him a visit.”

You lightheartedly scoff as you quickly wash the cups. “And also he’s just moved from your studio down to his and you think I can talk him into actually getting some rest?”

He laughs at how well you know your boyfriend. “I told him I was gonna call it a night but I don’t think he’s taking the hint,” he admits.

“Sounds like our guy,” you shrug, setting the clean mugs on the rack to dry. “I’ll pop by and check on him before I turn in.”

You head for the bathroom and quickly go through your routine; you mentally cheer when you turn on the light and see Ash’s green henley draped haphazardly over the bathtub. It smells like him so he must have just tossed it aside when he showered earlier; you inhale deeply as you slip it over your head and throw on a pair of sleep shorts before heading down to the basement where he’s working.

You tentatively make your way down the stairs, not wanting to startle him. As you suspected, he’s intently focused on his computer screen, dragging and dropping components of a track, trying to layer the elements just the way he wants, something he was recently so proud to tell you he had learned to do.

You knock quietly on the wall when you reach the bottom. He turns around to investigate and exclaims your name with far too much enthusiasm for the late hour. He opens his arms, which you know means he wants you to come sit on his lap. He greets you with a sweet kiss as soon as you sit down and hums when he recognizes the scent of your nighttime skin products. “Bedtime already?” He asks, sounding slightly disappointed.

You jab his side playfully. “Already? It’s pretty fucking late, dude,” you tease. “I fell asleep on the couch again.”

“Aww, baby, no,” he commiserates, stroking your arm empathetically. "You weren’t waiting up for me again, were you?”

“Maybe subconsciously,” you shrug. “Missed you a lot today. Dreamt about you last night. Dreamt about you while I was asleep right now. I dunno, it’s weird.” He hugs you tighter to him and you rest your head in the crook of his neck. “Matt said you had a good day, though?” You say in a bright voice, trying to compensate for your sad admission.

Ashton softly smiles and squeezes your leg, indicating he knows you wish you hadn’t told him what you did. “Yeah, it was crazy, I woke up with this song in my head and I had to rush down here before it went away,” he explains. “It was so clear in my mind - every instrument, every aspect of the production - and it took all day but we’ve almost got it exactly how I imagined it.”

You rest against him while he clicks around on the computer, playing you different files and explaining each step they took in their process that day. You watch him, instead of the screen, admiring the way he lights up when he talks about his art, the way his dimples just keep sinking deeper and deeper as he delights in telling you the inventive tactic they came up with to get the guitars to sound a certain way.

You peck at his cheek, enjoying the scratch from his light beard. “I’m so glad you had a good day,” you coo. “Think you might want to head up to bed with me now, though? I love seeing how happy this makes you but you’ve still gotta take care of yourself, babe. Still working when I go to bed and getting back at it before I wake up? It’s happening a lot and I get worried sometimes.”

He plays with the hem of your - his - shirt while he listens to your concern. “I know. It’s just easy to get caught up when it’s going good. And it’s all been going so good!” His wide smile turns to an understanding nod when he sees you lovingly shake your head at his excited excuse. “But I know you’re right, baby, I promise I have been trying to be mindful. Today was just the perfect storm.”

“OK,” you murmur, believing him for now, knowing you’ll surely be having this conversation again in a few days’ time. He tilts your chin up to him and moves in for a soft kiss. You sigh as his lips gently move over yours and you reach up to run your fingers through his hair; because of the lockdown, he’d been letting it grow and you were loving it. You’d convinced him to let you trim it a few times to keep it healthy and now you were obsessed with getting your hands on it all the time.

He starts to pull away but you let out a slight whine and bring him back in, deepening the kiss while you’re at it. He lets you lead the makeout as he wraps his arms around you, holding your body against his. You shift yourself in his lap so that you’re straddling him in the chair.

“Is this your plan to tire me out so I’ll come to bed?” Ash grins.

"Thought this was your plan," you tease, tugging his lip between your teeth. "You asked me to sit in your lap, I know your style."

He giggles as you start nipping at his jawline before making your way down his neck and settling in to kiss up and down his collarbones. He sits back and lets you work, running his hands up and down the back of your top, occasionally letting his hands wander down to appreciate how tight your sleep shorts fit over your ass.

“You’re markin’ me up, baby,” he laughs, attempting to detach your mouth from his chest.

You allow him to bring your mouth back up to his, darting your tongue across his bottom lip before saying with a smirk, “Something to help you remember me while you’re locked away working.”

Before he can respond, you move in to kiss him again and as you feel him growing hard underneath you, you lazily begin grinding on him. He groans and moves against you a few times before running a hand up the leg of your shorts.

He raises his eyebrows when he feels how wet you already are for him. “Aww, you really have been missin’ me, huh?” He teases, eyes shining in the dimly lit room. “You know you can always just tell me when you need me, that’s part of the fun of working at home.”

“Don’t wanna interrupt the artistic genius process,” you tease back, sitting further back on his thighs so you can palm him through his shorts. “Plus, I don’t think Matt would appreciate that very much.”

“I’d love it if we didn’t talk about Matt while your hand is on my dick,” he jokes, lifting his hand out of your shorts and up to his lips to lick. You roll your hips impatiently as you watch his lips suck your essence off his fingertips. “Mmm, sweet tonight, baby,” he murmurs. “Think I’m gonna need more.”

Ashton grips the backs of your thighs and suddenly he’s standing to lift you off of his lap and onto the desk in front of him. He deftly uses one hand to move his laptop and various hard drives to the side and uses the other to start tugging your shorts and panties down.

He drops to his knees and the surprise of that sight gets a low moan out of you. When he licks a stripe up your center, you take on a much whinier tone. “Babyyyy,” you try to reason with him, tugging on the collar of his white t-shirt. “I don’t wanna keep you awake any later than you need to be, let’s just fuck and get some sleep.”

He sits back on his heels, peeling off his shirt, flinging it behind him. “Heard my girl was missing me,” he counters, dragging a finger slowly through your wetness. “Gotta make sure you can make it through the day tomorrow.” His thumb plays gently at your clit while he runs his beard along your inner thigh - he’s learned you love the scratch - before fixing his mouth on your skin, clearly intent on leaving a large hickey.

You shiver when without much fanfare, Ash starts softly licking at your clit with just the tip of his tongue. “That’s my needy girl,” he says in a low voice that gives you almost as much of a chill as his mouth just did. Your brain constructs a witty reply but you’re not entirely sure the mumble that came out of your mouth made sense; his tongue is fluttering against your clit now and his hands are forcefully spreading your legs wider while somehow also tenderly massaging your skin.

You pry your hands off the edge of the desk where you’ve been bracing yourself and wrap them in his hair while his mouth works you, loving how his eyes dart up to thank you every time you brush a wayward curl off his forehead. It’s a great juxtaposition to the warning look you get when you start bucking your hips against his face. You didn’t mean to start getting rowdy but he slipped his fingers inside you at just the right angle and at the same time his beard dragged across your skin and his lips finally enveloped your clit - you couldn’t help yourself.

“Easy, sweetheart,” he soothes, sliding his hand underneath your shirt and laying his palm flat across your stomach to settle your movements. “Need it that bad? Could’ve sworn I had you the other night, you’re acting like I haven’t touched you in weeks.” His tone is the perfect blend of condescension and care and his words tease you almost as intensely as his fingers curling inside you.

Your reply is interrupted with a surprised moan when he fits his lips over your clit once again and starts sucking rapidly. “Maybe… having you… just makes… Jesus… makes me want you… mmm-more… fuck, babe, I’m cumming.”

You’re shocked by how fast and strong your orgasm hits you - maybe Ashton’s teasing wasn’t too far off and you are just that needy. You lay back on the desk, tugging at his hair, biting your lip to keep from crying out too loudly; try as you might, you can’t ignore the urge to grind against his mouth and the vibration from his groaning only adds to your pleasure.

He keeps at it until you push him away and you whine when he withdraws his fingers from you; you’ve just barely caught your breath when you squeeze his arm to get his attention, craving him near. He, of course, knows what you need and stands to tend to you. He brushes his fingers across your lips before cleaning the rest of your wetness off of them with his own mouth.

You’re pretty sure you see his cock jump in his basketball shorts as your tongue peeks out of your mouth to sample what he’s shared with you. “Taste good, baby?” He asks with heavy breath.

“Tastes better when I’m mixed with you,” you counter, pulling him in.

He moans into your passionate kiss, one hand trying to lean you back on the desk and the other yanking his shorts down. You resist his attempt, catching him off guard by pushing on his shoulders, guiding him back to his abandoned office chair; you climb in his lap to straddle him again, explaining, “Been wanting you like this all day.”

You take his cock in your hand and give it a few strokes before lifting yourself up and tapping your clit with the tip; you play like this for a minute, using him to tease yourself, rubbing your pussy on him, coating him in your wetness until he grabs your hips and sighs your name in a soft plea.

Smiling to yourself, you think maybe you should rib him about being as needy as you, except you don’t want to wait any longer to get him inside you; he watches intently as you balance yourself on the arms of the chair to line up and sink down on him. You groan together in lustful harmony at the feeling and you begin tentatively rocking your hips, enjoying the familiar stretch of him filling you.

You’ve got a moderate rhythm going when Ash starts playing with your nipples through your shirt; you slow your pace a bit and reach to pull the henley off when he stops you. “Leave it on,” he requests with a glint in his eye, fingers swiftly undoing a few buttons to expose more of your chest. “Now whenever I wear it, I won’t be able to stop picturing you riding me.”

You grin at him and lean back on his thighs, grinding slowly on his cock, trying to find that perfect angle. His hands are all over you, under and over the shirt, running over the tops and inside of your thighs; his grip eventually settles on your ass, kneading it and helping you bounce yourself on him.

You ride him at varying speeds, paying attention to the sounds he’s making and the way his body responds to your movements; you can’t get enough of seeing his jaw clench as he struggles not to fuck up into you, trying to let you have your moment.

He squeezes your ass so hard you know there’s bound to be finger shaped bruises in the morning. “Fuck, Ash,” you whisper, mouth against his ear. Your tongue flicks out to toy with his earring and the gasp you get in response is as satisfying as you’d hoped.

“Gettin’ close,” he strains, lifting his hips against yours slowly, thinking if he’s subtle enough maybe you won’t mind.

“God… same,” you tell him, speeding up and bringing a hand between your legs. “Wanna cum with you, babe.”

Ashton takes that as permission to be more blatant with his thrusting and as your breath starts stuttering, he even throws in a few slaps across your ass cheeks; his instincts are correct and within seconds you’re pulsing around him. Your eyes squeeze shut and flashes of white are all you see; you can tell by the tone of his voice he’s praising you as you orgasm but you can’t process what he’s saying.

His arms wrap around you and he holds you close as you squeeze his cock. You rock against him, working yourself through it when he buries his face in your chest to muffle an exhausted grunt as he cums inside you. You stroke his hair, murmuring how good he feels; he catches his breath and his embrace tightens around you as he pulls you into a soft yet sloppy kiss.

“Love you,” he says quietly, resting his head between your breasts again, beard prickling your skin.

You play with the thin chain he’s wearing, admiring the way the silver contrasts with the dark ink on the back of his neck. You’ve seen this side of Ash more in the past few months than you had the entire time you’d been together and it still takes you aback every time it comes out. “Love you too,” you whisper in reply.

He helps you off of him and you excuse yourself to the adjoining bathroom. When you return a few minutes later, he’s redressed, the desk is back in order and all his equipment is shut off.

“Bedtime?” You ask, pleasantly surprised.

He grins. “Like I’d be able to think about anything else tonight,” he reaches for your hand. There’s a comfortable silence as he starts to lead you out of the room before pausing at the foot of the stairs and turning to you. “You know I miss you too, right? When I’m working all the time like this? I think about you a lot.”

You lift your joined hands, kissing his knuckles. “I know, babe, I’m sorry if I made you feel bad when I said all that, I was just tired,” you frown slightly.

Ash slings his arm around you, kissing the top of your head. “Can I tell you a secret? This shirt was actually clean, I sprayed it with cologne and left it out for you,” he laughs, tugging at your collar. “Wanted to wear tomorrow and spend the day having you close to me.”

“Ashhhh, that’s so sweet it’s almost gross,” you aww. He chuckles as you hop onto the step in front of him and peck rapidly at his lips. “Bold of you to assume I’d let you have it back, though.”

He snorts and follows you up the stairs. You turn to him at the top. “Make you a deal: if you’re still in bed with me when I wake up tomorrow, the shirt’s yours.”

He spins you around and gives you a gentle swat, directing you to the bedroom. “Deal.”

————-

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