#Flualprazolam

[personality-not-found]

Miałam znowu relapse. W którym momencie moje uzależnienie poszło tak daleko? Ja naprawdę nie mogę przestać.

[sonchemsblog]

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[0dsmt]

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[legitchemszone]

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[0dsmt]

im on tramadol weed tapentadol carisoprodol flualprazolam and vaping ofc. the weed is enhancing the tapentadol hallucinations

who else tryna od tonite

[exjunkiebaby]

I know I haven’t logged on for a while, and I deeply apologize. I have been struggling with my addiction and it has gone completely out of control.

In May, I decided it was time to leave fentanyl behind. I had been using maybe every other day, sometimes daily, maybe sometimes weekly. But it was bad, and I knew I was becoming physically dependent, so it had to be done. It was the worst week of my life, and I justified using Xanax as a “comfort” medication.

Big mistake. Big fucking mistake. My addiction to fent turned into an addiction to Xanax and I didn’t even realize I had a problem until a few days ago. 

All the Xanax use, it fucked with my insomnia to the point where I could not sleep for the LIFE of me. I was up for maybe 14 days, and around day 10 I started to hallucinate. It were as if I had taken a dose of bitter, fake acid. People weren’t real, events weren’t real, my age wasn’t real - hell, the year I was living in didn’t even make fucking sense. I was so far gone that my boyfriend had no choice but to take me to the ER.

I was put under a 5150 hold and for the next week I sat in that hospital room, sleeping and recovering and getting off the Benzes. It was comforting and lovely to be away from reality - I think that’s why I could finally sleep.

I got out of the hospital, only to find myself back inside the mess that I had once previously resided in. I couldn’t sleep again, and I was desperate, so I took a shitload of Xanax and keeled over in front of my parents in the middle of a fight. My parents were scared shitless and I feel horrible. Yet again, I am here hurting those around me. Yet again, I have not learned.  Yet again, I find myself in a familiar position. Yet again, I am stuck. Just stuck.

Today I finally slept without the aid of Xanax for the first time in oe month. I am on a waiting list for a 90 day program. I’m back, trying again. But that’s the thing about me: I don’t ever quit.

Ever.

I'm exhausted for my readers. How do y'all put up with me? I constantly disappoint.

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[deadmeatdryblood]

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[fluaprazolam]

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[angelsglock]

30 drops of flualprazolam got me like; I’m sober let me take sum more