#Fen alburn

[theoldpersonliveshere]

"Happiness is a butterfly // Try to catch it like every night // It escapes from my hands into moonlight"

Ever since her mother died, Fen felt like she was never meant to be happy. She always felt alone even when she was surrounded by people.

“You will always have a place here.” Rhaenrya had told her when her mother died.

“You'll need to make yourself useful now that we're housing you. It would be a shame if we'd have to send you away.” Daemon said in contrast. Fen had tried not to think about the implications of what he said. She did not want to be sent to live with strangers. Her father was a shadow she only met once and she didn't even know her mother's family.

So she set herself to work, trying to show her worth. In the years that passed she would never be seen idling.

“The sweet girl does not know how to stop.” Rhaenyra would say. “Darling, you should take a break and rest.”

“That's alright, my lady, I like keeping busy,” Fen would say as she was mending a shirt while watching Joffrey.

The only peace she would find was spending time with Jacaerys. They understood each other. They were both trying to prove themselves. Jace would vent his frustrations to her and she would do her best to advise him. She would never tell him her worries. No, that was not her place. She didn't want to add to his burdens.

As they matured, a hope dwelled in the back of Fen’s mind that Jace would ask his mother to let the two of them marry, but she knew that was impossible. He would be king one day and Daemon and Rhaenys were already starting to push him towards Baela. She was a better match for him. Not some strange looking maid who could barely see.

Her speculation was confirmed at the Driftmark trial when it was announced that Jace and Baela were to be betrothed. Fen felt her heart wrench inside her chest and held back her reaction. She stayed silent and looked at Jace, he seemed pleased with the match. She couldn't blame him, Baela was stunning and seemed to be the perfect queen. She was still heartbroken though. When the trial was over Fen tried to go back to her room but Rhaenyra stopped her.

“Fen, would you like to join us for dinner?” she asked with a kind smile.

“Oh, no thank you, my lady, I wouldn't want to impose and I don't have anything to wear to a banquet. I'll just eat with the children.” Fen said, bowing her head.

Rhaenyra put a hand on her cheek,

“Nonsense, you're one of us and you will eat with us. I'll have a servant look in storage to find you a dress.”

When Fen arrived at the dinner, a few of the men took notice of her. The dress she was lent had been lower cut than what she was used to and had been laced tightly which showed off her bosom more. She didn't know how to feel about the attention and just rushed to her seat. She had been seated between Jace and Prince Aegon and Aegon was being his usual self.

“Lady Fen, when did you get tits?” Aegon had inquired, laughing as Fen turned red and Jace glared at him.

“Oh, like you haven't noticed. You've been staring at them half the night!” he retorted as Jace fumed. Aemond looked at them curiously during the dinner and seemed to be planning something.

Throughout the night many toasts were made including one where Helaena basically said that Aegon was neglecting her which got Jace's attention. When the music started he promptly stood up and asked Helaena to dance. Fen sighed, knowing that he was just doing it to get back at Aegon for his comments. She and Baela exchanged a look.

“Congratulations on your betrothal, Lady Baela,” Fen said politely. Baela looked surprised by her words but smiled appreciatively.

“Thank you, you look lovely in that dress by the way, the colour suits you,” she said. Fen was about to answer when Aemond approached her.

“Dance with me,” he said bluntly.

“Oh, uh no th-” Fen was immediately cut off.

“That was not a question,” he said. Fen relented and took his hand, leaving Aegon with Baela. Aegon looked at Baela tentatively.

“So do you want to…”

“No.”

“Okay.”

As they reached the dancefloor it felt like Aemond was pulling her so they were closer to Jace and Helaena. Jace looked annoyed at Aemond but continued dancing.

Fen tried to think of something to say to Aemond as they danced

“I saw you training earlier, you were very good.”

Aemond didn't answer.

“On Dragonstone, Joffrey has just started learning to swordfight. He's still a novice but he should reach the level of his brothers.”

Aemond smirked. “Yes, I'm sure they're very strong fighters,” he said, emphasizing the word strong.

Suddenly Jace stopped dancing.

“I dare you to say that again.”

“Why? It was only a compliment.” Aemond had the look of a wild animal in his eye. “Do you not think yourself strong?”

Jace was done, he punched Aemond in the jaw. It had little effect and he was pushed to the floor. A couple of guards had to hold him back so he didn't attack Aemond again. Rhaenyra told everyone to go to their rooms and Fen rushed out and ran down the hall.

“Fen wait!” Jace called after her.

“Why did you do that?” she cried out. “Are you trying to start a war?”

Jace stepped back a bit, surprised by her outburst

“He insulted me.”

“He was baiting you. He just wanted an excuse to fight you.”

“I know, it's just he was dancing with you and you're wearing that dress and…” he trailed off.

Fen looked worried.

“And what?” she asked softly.

“I don't want to marry Baela.“ he burst out. “I want to marry you!”

“You can't, you know you can't.” she turned to walk away but he grabbed her.

“Please, wait.” he looked through his pockets desperately. “My mother gave me this. I want you to have it.” he held out a ring with a black stone. “Please.”

“Jace… I can't- you-”

“No! Just take it!” he took her hand and put it on her finger. “See? It's perfect for you.”

Fen looked at the ring and smiled a little. It was pretty-

“You need to marry Baela! She's supposed to be your queen!”

“No, wait, please. I love you and I want to marry you.” he had her face in his hands. “Please. I've never wanted anyone but you.”

They looked at each other for a moment and he kissed her. Fen kissed him back but then started to think about what would happen if it were to continue and quickly pushed him away.

“I'm sorry, I can't.”

She took the ring off and handed it back to him.

“But-”

“Go back to your betrothed”

He looked at her forlornly and then walked away.

No, Fen was never meant to be happy.

@hotd-bigbang

[theoldpersonliveshere]

My first tag! Here is Fen and Jace

(I don’t have anyone to tag)

Bringing back my favorite Picrew!

Can you guess who‘s with me? 💅

No pressure tags: @marthawrites @lady-phasma @arcielee @thought--bubble @schniiipsel @aemondsbabe @sylasthegrim @anjelicawrites @aemondstark @helaenna @peachysunrize @kaelabear

[theoldpersonliveshere]

“I am done with my graceless heart // Tonight I’m gonna cut it out and then restart”

Sequel to Happiness is a Butterfly

Baela loved her mother, she was the bravest, kindest, most beautiful woman she’d ever known. But that doesn't mean she wanted to be an exact copy of her. Her grandmother thought differently.

When she was sent to ward at Driftmark, within the first week Rhaenys had sent for a hairdresser to comb out Baela's dreads. She remembered the long, painful process of the procedure and her grandmother telling her how pretty she’d look.

“Just like your mother,” she had said, “I used to sit with her every morning and brush her hair.”

When it was over she looked in the mirror and saw a stranger. But not wanting to displease her grandmother, she pasted on a smile and said how much she loved it.

It went in like that for years. Baela did her hair like her mother's and wore idealised versions of dresses she wore. Laena’s dresses were a bit more revealing than Rhaenys approved, so she would just wear what her grandmother would have picked for her mother. Baela had no idea who she was anymore. Then there were talks about a betrothal to Prince Jacaerys.

“You'll get back what was taken from you.” her grandmother had said.

“Taken from me? What was taken from me?” Baela had a suspicion that it had something to do with Laena. It always did.

“Oh,” Rhaenys started trying to cover up her mistake. “Your mother would have married King Viserys, if he hadn't married Alicent Hightower. You would have been a princess.”

Baela grimaced. She wouldn't like being Viserys daughter and having to compete with Rhaenyra for his affection.

Then her Uncle Vaemond decided to make a claim on Driftmark by declaring Rhaenyras sons bastards. She didn’t see the point in that, because if they were disinherited, she and Rhaena would be next in line to get Driftmark. Then again, Uncle Vaemond wasn’t the wisest of men.

At the trial, she saw Rhaenyra and her family for the first time in a long time. Jacaerys had grown from a child into a handsome young man. If she must marry, she wouldn't mind marrying him. Behind Jace was a strange looking girl with white hair and red eyes. She reminded Baela of a deer with the way she was trying to hide herself from the crowd. Before the trial started Jace had taken the girl's hand and was talking softly to her but she seemed to shrink whenever he touched her. Then the trial started and the betrothal between Baela and Jace was announced and the girl shrunk even smaller.

When the trial was over Baela was talking to Rhaenyra and decided to appease her curiosity.

“My lady, who was that pale girl at the trial? I haven't seen her before.”

“Pale girl… Oh that was Fen! Her mother was my maid and we took her in after she died. She's a sweet girl, always doing something.”

“And she and Jace are close?”

“They seem to be, but it isn't anything to worry about. Jace will do his duty.”

That did not comfort Baela.

At dinner Baela was sat next to Jace. Fen was sat on his other side and was wearing a red dress that was loaned to her. She had to admit that she looked lovely in the dress, the dark red was a nice contrast to her pale skin and hair. Unfortunately, Aegon noticed also and was making lewd comments to her. She was very tempted to punch him in the face to shut him up, but she didn't think her stepmother would appreciate that. It was tempting though.

When the dancing started, she had slightly hoped that Jace would ask her to dance. Instead, he approached Helaena and asked her to dance. That was nice she supposed, Helaena did seem lonely.

She and Fen were left sitting alone together. She was curious if she'd say anything or stay a wallflower.

“Congratulations on your betrothal, Lady Baela,” Fen said softly. Baela looked at her, Fen wasn't making eye contact and was looking down at her hands folded in her lap. The poor girl was clearly terrified and Baela pitied her. If only things were different.

“Thank you, you look lovely in that dress by the way, the colour suits you,” she said. She was about to tell her that Aegon was a pig and not to listen to him, but then Prince Aemond approached Fen and asked her to dance.

During the dance, Aemond must have said something snide to Jace, because a fight broke out. Unfortunately, Rhaena grabbed Baela before she could punch Aegon. When they were sent to their rooms, Baela saw Fen rush out closely followed by Jace. She silently went after them and hid in an alcove. The two were arguing in hushed tones and Jace had grabbed Fen’s hand. After another moment he kissed her, from the way Fen kissed him back it was obvious they were in love. Fen pushed Jace away and he stormed off.

Baela decided then she wouldn't marry a man who was desperately in love with someone else. She was not her mother.

@hotd-bigbang

[theoldpersonliveshere]

Sometimes at night, Jace and Fen would sneak out to stargaze. They would pack a picnic, sit on a blanket, and try to find the constellations. One time Jace brought a bottle of wine he'd snuck out and laughed so hard at Fen’s unfavourable reaction to the taste of it. Eventually, their meetings evolved into something more and they would lay on the blankets together and hold each other, afraid of letting go.

@hotd-bigbang

[theoldpersonliveshere]

For the @hotd-bigbang this month I decided to do something different and post a couple of headcanons I have for the Team Black Kids, including my ocs.

Jacaerys Velaryon

Jace has a strand of seaglass beads that he wears under his clothes that Fen made for him.

If he ever has a son he would have named it Harwin but knows that would be a bad idea.

Lucerys Velaryon

He doesn't want to be the heir to Driftmark and would rather give it to Baela or Rhaena (Whichever one would want it.)

Joffrey Velaryon

Spends most of his time with Fen because she's basically his nanny. He says she's his best friend.

Fen Alburn

Wears a strand of black dragonglass beads that Jace gave her.

Has a sea dragon named Seaglass that she hides in the caves by the Dragonstone beaches. Everyone thinks she's an unclaimed dragon.

Baela Targaryen

Is bisexual.

Has somehow persuaded Jace to teach her sword fighting and has beaten him a few times. He doesn't like to talk about it.

Rhaena Targaryen

Wants to learn how to use a sword like Baela, but she has bad hand-eye coordination, so she decides not to.

Asha Pyke

Illegimate daughter of Daemon Targaryen and an Ironborn woman. No one knows that she’s Daemon’s because of her dark hair.

Of her half-sisters, she likes Rhaena better because she and Baela are too similar.

Bara Celtigar

More than once has considered cutting her hair and pretending to be a man to become a maester.

Tychar Inmain

Fen’s cousin from her mother’s side.

Was sent to Dragonstone after Viserys died.

Was born deaf and had to read lips but used a form of sign language with his family.

Is half Tyroshi on his mother's side.

[theoldpersonliveshere]

The Pale One

Fen Alburn had always been unnaturally pale since birth and had pure white hair and red eyes. Some people had even thought she was a Targaryen bastard. Her father was from the Vale and her mother was Rhaenyras maid and she had died of a fever a couple of years ago. She has since become an unofficial ward of Rhaenyra and serves as a nanny to her three youngest sons and has become close to her oldest two sons, especially Jacaerys.

[theoldpersonliveshere]

Masterlist

Characters

Fen Alburn

Baehna Celtigar

Bara Celtigar

Tychar Inmain

Joren Karstark

Lyarra Karstark

Nyessen Martell

Bennar Palker

Darnis Palker

Enith Palker

Asha Pyke

Basella Velaryon

Kyra Waters

Shael Waters

Pairings

Aegon and Shael

Aemond and Enith

Fen and Jace

Helaena and Joren

Friendships

Aegon and Bennar

Alicent and Darnis

Alicent and Rhaenyra

Darnis and Rhaenyra

Enith and Shael

Other