#FINALLY remembered to write an ID for this lollll

[cedarspiced]

hiya! i'm cedar! i'm a 22 y/o grey-ace fagdyke creature living in the PNW.

buy me a kofi?

my free/cheap anthro bases

gazafunds.com

sudanfunds.com

some things about me:

ΘΔ grackle-cat griffin, sable, cat, deinonychus, coydog, painted dog

i use it/they pronouns

i'm ADHD and autistic

i'm a physically disabled cane & wheelchair user with long covid, POTS, and several other fun conditions

i'm polyam and partnered with @bovinebimbobussy <3

i'm a huge paleoenthusiast and while i do have a soft spot for Mesozoic dinosaurs, i'm also a big fan of all the other prehistoric critters and plants. opabinia my beloved

i'm a furry and reblog furry art & fursuit pics sometimes, so if u don't wanna see that, please block those tags!

i also do reblog unreality stuff from time to time and I often forget to tag it, so if that's something that could bother you, please be forewarned.

i also reblog some nsfw text posts, so please be aware of that!

rent lowering gunshots:

kink belongs at pride and always has

masks & vaccines are awesome and slow the spread of disease

black lives matter and always have

free palestine. death to israel & to the USA.

if you say you're trans, you're trans. end of. there's no other requirements.

sex is a spectrum, not a binary. also, intersex people belong in the queer community.

TMA and TME are just terms used to describe a group most affected by a certain type of discrimination (in this case, transmisogyny). no, TME does not automatically mean transmasc. it also includes all cis perisex people and non-transfem intersex folks. (what do TME/TMA mean?)

thought crimes aren't real and having paraphilias doesn't automatically make you an Evil Bad Person

callout posts are only ever harmful. yes even if they really did do that thing they're being accused of.

the tr*nsandroph*bia movement is just Mens' Rights Movement: Transgender Edition. yes, transmascs are oppressed. that is purely because we are transgender. not because we are transgender & masc.

asexual and aromantic people belong in the queer community. yes, even the cishet ones.

vote-scolding people who have already made up their mind about an election is only going to make everyone more upset at each other, and calling people bots or russian psy-ops for having a different political opinion is uh. Not Cool. to put it politely (a.k.a. that behavior is rooted in primarily USamerican racism and xenophobia.) sometimes people just have different takes based on different lived experiences!

tagging explanations, sideblogs, other socials, and fursona refs under the cut :3

my tags:

#cedar speaks - my personal posting tag

#my face - self explanatory

#my art - also self explanatory

#no id - posts with no image description

#partial id - posts with some images described, but not all. alternatively, posts that have an ID that only describes part of the image (e.g. a post with a picture of an orange cat wearing a blue t-shirt that's captioned 'i love his little shirt' but the image is just described as 'a small animal'.)

#described - posts that have all images fully described

my sideblogs:

@sableteeth - therian/alterhuman sideblog @cedarspiced-artchive - all of my art gets reblogged to here

@morrowinds - all things elder scrolls

@slime-squishes - mined craft :]

@zooplanet - planet zoo, though i've been thinking about making it a sims sideblog as well

@the-fog-chamber - echo vn stuff

@fagmoans - horny blog. dni unless you're 18+

other socials (not really active on em, but jic this site goes tits-up):

instagram

cohost

bluesky

furaffinity

my fursonas:

Cedar (my namesake <3)

art by marlomogensen, with minor edits & background by me

[more detailed IDs for these coming soon, please be patient!]

Nyx (my truesona)

art by yours truly!

[robertdowneyjjr]

nursey the tech disaster and dex the apple support guy: an au

a conversation between me & @brandnewfashion

(interspersed with random hockey commentary)

kayytx

au where nursey keeps having IT trouble and every time he goes online to use that quick chat help service (bc he doesn't want to call. that's awkward af) he gets dex as the service guy

brandnewfashion

oooooh

nice!!!!!!!!!!!!

TELL ME MOER

kayytx

i'm trying to decide what products nursey's using that he keeps having issues lmao

i feel like fandom consensus states nursey is a mac guy?

brandnewfashion

yeah i can't see him not using them

kayytx

so basing off of my experience trying to update my software for FOUR HOURS at staying up until 3am bc of that shit ugh

the first time he has to contact apple support online he's trying to upgrade his OSX to the latest software, but it keeps stalling a quarter of the way through

so nursey borrows chowder's laptop to go on apple's website for support help and dex answers

and legit, that shit takes...four hours

brandnewfashion

lol i wouldn't know

sounds annoying tho

kayytx

it's supposed to be only half an hour but my laptop just decided to be a little shit

but anyway

in between dex telling nursey what to do, and nursey following instructions and waiting for his laptop to show some progress

they start chatting

bc nursey is bored and it's late at night and there's nothing else for him to do, especially since his computer isn't working

imagine nursey like, suddenly thinks of a few verses for a poem and types them in the chat bc he couldn't find anywhere else to write atm

and dex is like ??????

brandnewfashion

yesss

kayytx

YASSS HABS WIN

ok anyway

brandnewfashion

GOOD

kayytx

so that obvi leads to a convo where dex asks what nursey does and nursey talks about being an english major

and dex tells him about doing comp sci and working for apple part time

brandnewfashion

FINALLY THE FLAMES SCORED

and yes good i'm liking this au

kayytx

idk how many call locations there are in the US though so i'm trying to figure out where dex is based rn

like i'm kinda tempted to have him live in nyc

but i don't work for apple so idk how true this is

brandnewfashion

dude that'd be cool though? and nursey could be like "YO I'M FROM THERE" and dex, who just started school there, could be like "ok is there any place to get decent ____ bc i haven't found one yet"

kayytx

yeS EXACTLY

so nursey recommends some like hipster coffee places and one day dex remembers this convo and goes and at first he's like, what the FUCK this place serves out of mason jars NO

but he tries the coffee and he honestly thinks it's liquid cocaine so he keeps going back

brandnewfashion

lolllll

kayytx

anyway so like after three hours of chitchat and apple support nursey's computer finally boots properly and installs the update

so they say goodbye, it's been really fun talking to you, thanks for the help, etc. etc. and sign off

then three weeks later nursey's iphone spazzes out

and the nearest apple store is an hour away and he just doesn't have the time to go there, wait another hour for the genius bar to have an opening, and then go back to campus

so he goes online to apple support and clicks the chat option

and it's dex again

dex recognizes him from his apple ID, which usually never happens but bc they had such a good convo last time nursey left an impression

and so again in between helping out nursey he's just like, oh HEY i went to that place you told me about!

so nursey tells him about more places to visit

brandnewfashion

ok ben bishop is in net for the kings (no surprise) but he's wearing his lightning mask and it's really throwing me off

kayytx

god that's so weird

brandnewfashion

ANYWAY

what places does nursey tell him to go toooooo

how long does tihs go on before they get the opportunity to meet?????

kayytx

OKAY OK so

idk i think this happens like four or five times?

apple products arent THAT terrible lmao you can't have that many issues with your products

but nursey's a disaster so

he manages to fuck up something every few weeks

and like after the third time he enters the chat dex's coworkers recognize him also and they just pass him off to dex immediately hahaha

brandnewfashion

lmaooo

kayytx

oh FUCK stars tied the game

anyway

brandnewfashion

RUDE

kayytx

honestly after the fourth time nursey goes online with an issue about his ipad's storage issue or whatever dex is just really tempted to give nursey his number bc for the most part he's been able to solve his problems without referring to the resources at his desk

OH SHIT STARS IN THE LEAD

brandnewfashion

EXCUSE ME WHAT

FUCK U STARS

kayytx

UGH

anyway so yeah dex wants to give nursey his number and nursey wants to ask for it, but they both know the chats are monitored and that's just highly inappropriate and nursey doesn't want to get dex fired

so they both resist but like

it's kinda killing both of them

brandnewfashion

D:

kayytx

yeah like they're both p sure they're gonna die before they ever meet bc they're Dramatic af

BUT!! THIS IS FIC!!! and i love them and want them to be together so DO NOT DESPAIR

nursey goes back to nyc for winter break

and he doesn't want to be all cooped up at home with nothing to do

so he decides to go out, find some inspo, write a bit

AND THEN this suddenly becomes a coffee shop au

nursey goes to that mason jar hipster cafe to get some work done

but in the middle of writing his computer shuts down and he panics REALLY LOUDLY

and what??? dex is THERE???

brandnewfashion

LOL

AMAZING

HOW CONVENIENT

kayytx

R I G H T

he had the day off and was also there to work on some freelance coding projects he has on the side and in the middle of coding he hears this really loud person screaming at his laptop and he's like, what the FUCK

so he looks up and sees nursey doing SOMETHING with his computer. he's not even sure what

and in teh cafe there are like three other people with their laptops out, but dex is the closest and he looks the least busy (nursey is wrong. dex is the busiest, he just looked up at the wrong time and Eye Contact happened and now he's stuck)

so nursey goes over to him and he's like, "yo bro can i borrow your laptop to go on apple support and get some help"

bc that response is just like ingrained in him now. anytime something happens he just. goes on apple support

dex, being the lil shit he is, just goes, "have u tried turning ur computer off and on again"

brandnewfashion

HA

kayytx

nursey: it won't even turn ON dex: maybe its out of battery nursey: it's plugged in??? do u not see it????? dex: maybe your cord doesn't work

dex just. doesn't want to help

he does enough of that at work

brandnewfashion

lollll

kayytx

but nursey is really annoying and he figures the easiest way to get rid of him is to help him so he's like, ok fine i actually work at apple i'll help you

brandnewfashion

wow

the pens are gonna lose

to the STARS

kayytx

.....that's so depressing

brandnewfashion

they got too fucking cocky

ugh

kayytx

D:

brandnewfashion

anyway

dex helps him?

kayytx

dex helps him!

and meanwhile nursey's chattering on and on about how this is the first time someone's actually physically helped him with his laptop bc he never goes to the genius bar even though he probably should and he's terrible with technology and things always just die on him so he always has to get help from online support and it's kinda funny how he always gets the same guy who helps with his problems and it's actually kinda nice talking to him, and he kinda really likes him, but he doesn't think they'll ever meet bc why would that ever happen right? hey maybe dex would know him since they're both working for apple? but what are the chances?? surely there are thousands of people who work for apple

and like all this time dex has sorta just been tuning him out while he works on nursey's computer but he catches a few things here and there

and he's like

wait

rewind

dex: holy shit nursey: what? what is it, is my computer really dead this time? dex: you're derek nurse nursey: umm? yes?

and for a sec nursey thinks that he's just somehow become notorious within apple support center circles or something bc he's gone for help so many times

but then dex introduces himself and he's like OH HOLY SHIT

brandnewfashion

NICE

kayytx

and like sometime during nursey's little ramble he mentioned how he thought dex is funny and really nice and seems like someone he'd like to date and of COURSE dex totally heard all of that

dex: so. you think i'm funny. and you want to date me huh? nursey: ...well i mean maybe? dex: okay well just do you know just because we're both in a coffee shop right now declaring our feelings this ISN'T our first date okay bc i refuse to have our first date be one where i fix something for you again nursey: oh so YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR ME TOO?

brandnewfashion

HA

kayytx

dex: well yeah. i wanted to give you my number but i couldn't do that without a monitored chatroom nursey: i wanted to give you my number too! dex: well? technically? i have your number? because it's in our systems dex: but i didn't want to seem like a creep if i'd just randomly texted you

but anyway they finally exchange numbers like normal people and nursey Officially asks dex out on a date

but then internally he's struggling bc he basically already gave dex a list of all the best places in nyc and now he has nothing to impress dex with lmfao

brandnewfashion

HAHAHAHA

kayytx

they end up going to brooklyn for smorgasburg bc you cant really ever go wrong with that

wait jk that's seasonal so it wouldn't be open for winter break LMAO

brandnewfashion

oh gosh they're gonna become a disgustingly sweet long distance couple

kayytx

yeah nursey's fucked

YES THEY ARE

they're so gross honestly

brandnewfashion

they always have shit going on

there's ALWAYS something hapening haha

kayytx

and dex's coworkers notice that this dude hasn't been on the chat in a really long time??? and they kinda start feeling bad for dex bc they knew he had a bit of a crush on nursey lmao

brandnewfashion

ok but then dex has them all over to meet his "new boyfriend" and they all walk in on nursey screaming at his laptop and they're like "OH"

kayytx

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

and at this point dex is already at the fondly exasperated stage and he's like, jfc nurse you should just give up on technology altogether