#Everytime I tried to do my closing she steamrolled right over me

[sensoryseraphim]

Love that I apparently have enough charm to make old ladies love to talk to me and not enough backbone to make them Stop

[a-cupof-jo]

Set Up My Heart PT. 11

Pt. 10 -- Pt. 11 -- Pt. 12

~~

College volleyball player!Johnny Suh x reader

Rivals-to-lovers

Fluff and angst

Synopsis: Ever since that fateful day Sophomore year of high school, Johnny Suh had been an insufferable thorn in your side. Once you made it to college you thought the two of you would never have to see each other again. That is, until a sudden school transfer has the entire university buzzing.

Warnings: some language, food mentioned

~~

Your foot had barely crossed the entrance way when a hand grabbed your wrist, "Take one more step and you're done for.” Your breath quickened as you couldn’t make out the face in the doorway. The thin hand tightened and you shifted further away, “Are you a friend or foe?” The female voice was pitched low in a hushed whisper. 

“Um,” you gulped, trying to figure out what she was doing here. “Friend?”

“Good,”  you were dragged into the dark apartment and an object was shoved into your arms. “We don’t have much time. Do you know how to shoot?” 

“What,” you squeaked, feeling around the object until you realized, it’s a gun. “Why are you here? What do you want with me?” 

“I’m out for blood,” you could feel the presence moving further away from you, down the dark hall to where you knew the bedrooms were. 

“No!” you yell. You lifted the gun pointing it directly at the shadowy woman, “I can’t let you hurt them!” You pulled back on the trigger. 

You waited a second. A yell sounded around the apartment, “Ouch, really right in the eye.” The lights flew on as Jaehyun’s laugh boomed through the apartment. 

Jaehyun was knelt over by the light switch, his hand supporting himself while his laughter threw him off balance. “Serves you right,” his eyes lit up as he took in the girl standing at the opposite side of the hallway. 

She tsk’d before dropping the nerf gun that swung in her hand. You watched as she jumped at Jaehyun wrapping her legs around his waist. He spun them around and around all the while laughing. He tilted his head up kissing her. They slowed standing still in the center of the living room. 

“Can you two get a room?” Jungwoo’s dislocated voice caught you off guard. He crawled out from between the couch and the wall. “Everytime, seriously.”

“Hi, Jungwoo,” you watched the girl giggle and hop down from Jaehyun’s arms. She pulled Jungwoo into a big hug. “It’s been too long. How have you been? What have you been up to lately?” 

“Hiding from a crazy girl that breaks into my apartment and tries to shoot me with a Nerf gun,” he glared down at the plastic toy laying in the hallway. He yelped when the girl hit his shoulder, “and I’ve just been focusing on school and tutoring.” He looked up at you, “Speaking of which. Y/n was here for tutoring before you coerced her into attacking you.” 

“Oh,” the girl spun to you. “That's right!” 

Jaehyun chuckled a smile on his face as he watched her, “Lila, this is Y/n. Y/n, this is Lila, my girlfriend. Y/n lives down that hall and is our friend.”

“It’s so nice to meet you,” she stepped out of Jeahyun’s arms and embraced you in her own. You responded with similar words,  all the while you couldn’t help but think that Chonhee would get along great with her.  “Well,” she clasped her hands together. “I would love to stick around and get to know you, you’re busy, and Jaehyun promised to take me to the on campus ice cream shop.” 

“Oh,” you dropped your bag in the spot by the couch you usually sat on. “That sounds delicious right now. Make sure you try their new blueberry ice cream, it’s delicious!” 

Jaehyun and Lila grinned at you, opening the door to let in a cool breeze. “Will do! Now get to studying,” Jaehyun gave a pointed look to the backpack. “I don’t want to experience the night before stress crying again. I don’t know how to cheer you up.” 

You gasped at him, “I have no idea what you are talking about. I do not come over here to stress cry to you guys.”

“Oh, are you talking about Y/n’s test stress crying study sessions,” Johnny stood outside the front door. 

“No!” you yelled as Jungwoo laughed out a yes. 

“Ah, you see the way to handle that,” Johnny stepped inside the warm apartment. Jungwoo and Jaehyun leaned in slightly waiting for Johnny’s advice, “Is unknown, even in high school Y/n was this way.” He laughed as you huffed at him. He walked up next to you, “Do not worry,” he patted the top of your head. “STEM isn’t for everyone, and crying is normal.”

“I can’t tell if you're patronizing me or not.” You narrowed your eyes at his retreating figure. 

He waved his hand flippantly, “Take it as you will. I am ordering Chinese. You want your usual?”

You nod at Jungwoo who had come up to join you at the couch, “Yes, please.” He called down the hall. You heard an affirmative noise from Johnny. It was weird. You and Johnny’s new found tolerance of each other. Insults were still through back and forth. Years of hurt couldn't be buried under smiles and buying food for each other, but you had found that it was much easier to be at Jungwoo’s apartment now. In the nearly two weeks since the “truce”, as Johnny calls it when he feels the need to remind you that you two were being civil with each other, Johnny had turned from a thorn in your side or a hindrance to a sometimes helpful hand or at least he’s not actively trying to kick you out of the apartment anymore.

“Should we get to it?” Jungwoo shifted closer to you. You groaned, opening up your backpack, “Hey, don’t give me that. We have to this now so that you won’t-”

You clamped a hand over his mouth, “If you say ‘be over here stress crying’ I will steal the crab ragoon I know Johnny is going to buy specially for you.”

Jungwoo shook his and you lowered your hand, “I was going to say. So that you will be fully prepared for your upcoming test.”

“Mhhm,” you gave him a disbelieving look. He grinned at you and you grinned back. You jostled his shoulder and you moved in closer, “Okay, let’s get started before the food gets here.” 

30 minutes later, a loud knock broke you out of concentrating on the problem Jungwoo had you working on. “I’ll get it,” you stood from the couch and reached for the door. Johnny raced down the hall and stopped next to you. He pulled a couple of bills from his wallet before you opened the door. “Oh.”

“Kun,” Johnny greeted, surprised. 

“Hey, Johnny!” Kun handed over the food. He glanced over at you, his eyebrows furrowed a moment before recognition lit his face, “and Y/n. Nice to see you both. How’s it going?” His eyes dipped back over to Johnny as they exchanged food and money. “I didn’t realize you were in town.”

“Yes,” Johnny's voice came out clipped.

Kun looked undeterred as if he didn’t pick up on Johnny’s shortness, “You still doing journalism?” At Johnny’s nod he grinned, “Man, you had some great stuff in high school, I’m sure you’re going to be great out in the real world. I still remember some great ones we wrote together. Like that expose on-” he cut off but you caught his gaze flicker to you. 

Johnny’s face remained neutral, “I didn’t write an expose with you.” He glanced down at the cash in Kun’s hand. “You know I would love to continue catching up, but we’ve got things to do. You can keep the change.” Before Kun could say another word, the door swung shut effectively stopping the conversation. Johnny couldn’t look at you as he took the food to the kitchen table. Dread filled your stomach. Why did it feel like the progress you had made with Johnny had been dissolved all because of Kun? Watching him tonight with Johnny, he seems to hate you. You had no idea why as you had never spoken with him in high school. Was he holding old grudges? As you mulled over the thought, Johnny glanced up at you as he finished setting out food. He gave you a slight grin and suddenly some of the weight in your chest lifted.

~~

“You’re here again?” Johnny walked into the living room with his laptop tucked under his arm. The grin on his lips said that he was teasing, but there was a look in his eyes that held something else. Something you didn’t want to find the meaning of. 

You threw your legs over Jungwoo’s lap and spread out across the soft grey couch, “I live here now.” 

“Rent’s due on the 15th,” Jungwoo quipped, not looking up from his notebook. You stuck your tongue out at him while Johnny laughed, motioning for you to sit up.  

He sat down letting himself bounce on the sofa a few times before opening his laptop. You leaned over to see the pictures that were open in his photoshop app. The one he was working on, a black and white photo of Taeyong, you recognized as one he had taken back at the quad several weeks ago.

“It looks good,” you comment. He grins at you as he makes a few more adjustments. You watched for a few more moments before leaning forward and going back to the mock finance report you had been working on. 

Soft music drifted up from the speaker Jungwoo had hooked up and the tapping on keyboards were all that accompanied it. You couldn’t help but feel at peace sitting in their apartment. The quiet ambiance gave the feel of a warm coffeehouse without the paranoia of some stranger watching what you are working on. Jungwoo stood up and mentioned going to his room for a virtual tutoring session. You nodded to him and Johnny sent him a ‘good luck, dude’ before the apartment was submerged back into near silence.

Jaehyun steamrolled into the living room, Lila following close behind him, “Johnny, I need help.” He yelped sitting down in the love seat adjacent to the couch. “Oh good, Y/n, you’re here too!” 

“What’s up Jaehyun,” you lifted your laptop off yourself and down onto the coffee table. 

He rolled his eyes as he glared at the screen, “My professor is a hard ass and I can’t seem to do anything right in this class. He says that my papers need serious help and I am just frustrated with all of this at this point. Would you guys look at them and help me out?”

He scrubbed a hand through his hair and Lila rubbed his back lightly. You and Johnny shared a look before nodding at the boy who looked two seconds away from crying. “Thank you,” he cheered, pulling a thick stack of paper from his backpack. “I seriously owe you guys.” You went to wave him off as he shot up from his seat, “I know. I’m gonna go get some food to cook for us.” He grabbed Lila’s hand and she waved as he dragged her out of the apartment. 

“Okay,” you drug out the word as you raised your eyebrow at Johnny. “Well, why don’t you go ahead and read through it first and make some edits and I’ll look at it afterwards and then we can talk about other changes that need to be made. Johnny nodded, pulling out a red pen in a flourish. You shook your head at the grin he sent your way. He gave a light laugh before he brought the paper up and started to read through it.

Not fifteen minutes later, Johnny gave you a light nudge before holding the paper and pen out to you. You grabbed both calmly starting at the first page. As you read through, you caught sight of a few of Johnny’s edits. You were surprised to see some of the comments on things such as writing style and sentence structures were similar to ones you would have made. 

The pen clicked as you set the paper down in front of both you and Johnny. “Well, he’s got a good start. It’s really not bad.”

Johnny nodded, glancing through the paper again. He pointed to the pen as he saw another error to fix, “His professor is being pretty hard on him. This paper has a lot of good content.” 

You hummed in agreement, “I was surprised to see some of your comments. Based on what I remember from high school your writing was nothing like this. I mean I know it’s been three years, but I didn’t expect it to change so much.” You heard the door click and Jaehyun announced they were back and going to start cooking what they bought. 

“I’m sure I mentioned it, but in high school our works were put through so many hands that by the time it was published it didn’t really feel like our own work,” Johnny shrugged as he circled a sentence with his red pen. “They changed so much stuff or arranged for them to say what they wanted. We didn’t even know what it was going to say until it was published.”

You swallowed, your voice came out soft and whispered, “Even the-” Eyes glanced up catching yours and your voice halted. 

“Especially that one,” he spoke quickly, as if he couldn’t bear to hear the rest of the sentence fall from your lips.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” 

His eyes dropped and his voice tightened, “I tried. If you remember, you didn’t let me talk and smashed food on my clothes.

You ignored him, too many questions running around your head, but there was one that you had to ask, “Which part was yours?”

“The fact that you have to ask me makes me think you don’t believe me or you actually think I would write something like that,” Johnny shook his head, disbelief coating every word.

“Just,” his head jerked to you as your hand cupped his face. “Please, tell me.” 

He sighed, “Y/n, I’m sure you know that- well that the time you should have- in high school I really-” he swallowed hard. His eyes searched yours for answers from the past. Answers you wouldn;t let him have. He tugged your hands off his face and lightly held them in his own. He took a deep breath, “Y/n, I adored you. I don’t know how you could have missed that. You didn't, did you? Everything I put in that paper in high school was to make you the star. I wanted everyone to see you in the same light I did. So, why would I ever think about putting that article out. Kun, he was the editor and he changed it, changed my words. Where are you going?” Johnny lunged for you as you shot up from the couch. Your legs shook as you tried to step away from him. 

“I spent years Johnny, years, hating you. Thinking that you-” You panicked laced voice was heavy with tears. “I knew I couldn’t and then you- Kun - did this and I used it as an excuse. A way to tell myself that-” you tugged your wrist from his grasp. “I have to go. I can’t. I need some air. I’m so sorry.” You turned racing through the kitchen. Footsteps sounded behind you. Jaehyun and Lila looked up, shocked, as you passed them by the front door. Johnny’s fingers brushed your hand as you passed under the doorway. “I can’t do this. Now I’m so sorry.” You closed the door tightly. You were running away, but what else could you do? Johnny had just spun your perspective of him off axis.  It wasn’t fair. He couldn’t do this to you, not when your world was already so off kilter. 

You pushed thoughts of Johnny out of your head as you raced down streets and sidewalks. Your legs carried you far away from your apartment and down to the creek that was at least 45 minutes away. You drew in deep breaths as the water in front of you stopped your run.

“Okay,” Lila stopped behind you just minutes later. “I’m going to have to start training with you.” She bent over pressing her hands to her knees for a few breaths. 

You gave her a tight smile, “You didn’t have to follow me.”

She shrugged sitting down on a large rock by the bank, “I know, but you left in such a hurry. You looked like you were about to pass out. Still kinda do.” She patted the smooth surface next to her, “Sit.”

You leaned back letting yourself lay out across the rock. Bright beams of light broke through tree branches coming to shine down on the two of you. You squinted using your hand to cover your eyes, “Are you going to know what all of that was about?”

Lila shook her head, “If you want to tell me, you can, but I won’t make you.” She looked down at you as she leaned back on her hands. 

You gave a light hum glancing at her from under your cupped hand. “What would you do?” She threw you a slightly confused look, “If someone you thought you had figured out, someone you had a certain perception of, turned out to be different than that picture.”

She sat silent, considering your words, “To be honest, I don’t know. I’ve known Jaehyun my entire life and it seems like all of my close friends are pretty transparent with me.” You rolled your eyes lightly. She wasn’t being helpful. In fact, she was making matters worse, “but I think that, if it was one of them, Jaehyun or my friends, I would have reacted the same way.  It’s better for you to be out here, clearing your head figuring things out, rather than trying to respond while the world is crumbling.”

With that comment the two of you were plunged back into silence. The sound of breathing and the creek was the only thing to reach your ears. The sun warmed you as the two of you laid on the rock. You had dozed off when you heard the crunching of gravel and a hand shaking your shoulder. Lila leaned over you as you blinked slowly at her. “Sorry to wake you,” her voice came out softly. “Jaehyun’s here to pick us up. He said that you were needed back at the complex.” 

“I really don’t think I can face Johnny yet,” you whispered back.

She shook her head, “I don’t think this is about Johnny.”

You furrowed your eyebrows but followed her up to the small red pickup Jaehyun drove. He gave you a tight smile as you slid in the back seat, “Sorry.” His voice held a careful tone, one that said he didn’t know how to act. You returned the tight smile and he sped towards the apartment. You weren’t sure how long it took you guys to get back, but the orange hue of the sun allowed you to watch the front door of your apartment come into view. The figure of someone standing outside your apartment made you hesitant to approach. Jaehyun walked next to you as you stepped into the eyesight of the man. He looked back with a concerned look on your face as you breathed out a tight, “Dad?”

~~

taglist:  @qianinterprises @stayctday @infnteen @lanadreamie @michplusb @beyond-gethsemane @jaxminskale @nanascupid @sadgirlroo

[survivorarabia]

EPISODE 12 “Ruthie Is Literally My Mum” - Emmott

Ruthie

Alex, you've got more than everyone else combined.  YOU CAN STOP ANSWERING ALL THE QUESTIONS NOW.  I LOVE YOU BUT GEEZ. <3 

Alex

Final 6, baby!  And actually, because I won, Final 5 baby! The plan for this round is to take out Emmott, simple.  Nobody trusts him, yadda yadda, fifth verse same as like the last four rounds.  But what I'm doing this round is setting in place the groundwork for Final 5. First of all, Lena's Idol.  That's a problem.  It could lead to 2/5 of the Final 5 being immune, and I have no guarantee that I'm gonna win Immunity next round, so I could be one of three vulnerable people that round.  If that's the case, that's not good for me. I also have to consider at this point that my strongest opponent at FTC is Ruthie, right?  So I have abandoned ALL MORALS, FOLKS, because guess who's coming for Ruthie next round, it's me, I'm a monster, here to slaughter your faves. I trust Richie enough at this point that he's not gonna vote me, and that I can talk him into a Ruthie vote should Nicole and/or Lena be immune next round. What I have to do is plant the seeds in Lena's head that a) she should play her Idol this round because b) Ruthie is coming for her...which is not entirely untrue! The argument I'm gonna use is simple: Ruthie is paranoid (true, backed up by her behavior during blind week) and is concerned about being vulnerable at 5 (true, even if I'm projecting my own feelings onto her), so she might try to assemble a blindside on Lena now (false, but she doesn't need to know that). Then, at 5, I can get a 3 or 4 person vote on Ruthie, bam pow, Alex slides to the end, beats Lena and whoever else is there, is a monster but still wins.

Alex

WHEW, Nicole woke up and started to play! Apparently she was all up in Richie's ear last night about the Lena/Ruthie/Me threesome and how she and Richie needed to grab Emmott and force one of us out of the game. Girl you do MIND It is MY JOB to tear apart this alliance!   Not yours!  Stay in your lane! Apparently she's backed off it, which is too bad, because really she should try it.  See what happens, girl. Luckily I have utilized this info to aid in the flushing of Lena's Idol so hopefully there will be at least one bright spot in all this.  I think it might just work, honestly.

Richie

IM FREAKING OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M LITERALLY IN PSYCHOSIS... my mind is literally one of those kermit memes where its like me: shut up, you have your Family 4 alliance you've been with since week 2, you love them and you should vote out emmott because he's messy and erratic and theres no loyalty there then the kermit in the hoodie aka neurotic me: BITCH YOU HAVENT MADE ANY Big Moves™THIS GAME YET, ALEX IS THROWING YOU UNDER THE BUS TO EMMOTT, YOU CAN'T WIN AGAINST ANY OF THESE PEOPLE HERE START FUCKING SHIT UP!!!!! ughhhhhhh i feel such a close bond with the family alliance where i dont want to turn on them bc i like them but also bc it will be SUCH a betrayal that if i'm the one to turn on them and i make it to the end i don't have their jury vote... and nicoles my girl i dont want to vote her out either she's been coming to me trying to make moves and i want to because its her but then im like i want to vote out the person in her position but i dont think its the smartest to vote HER.... i hatee last night nicole came to me and was like "lena/ruthie/alex are going to steamroll us in f5 lets vote out either lena and ruthie" and i was like hmm.... i thought nicole and ruthie were super close thats sketchy also this whole game i've been trying to play up my distance from the khiana people so i can maintain connection with the fawz people to get information so i can keep myself and the people im with in the loop and safe so its cool that i'm not seen as really a part of that 3some when this whole time its been us 4..... but still so i was going to rat nicole out and use that to turn the family against her but then i was like.......1) nicole gave me a receipt of ruthie saying something about a group chat which i deduced was a group chat between lena/ruthie/nicole, this is a total assumption and wild guess based on minimal information, but still if thats true and this is just nicole trying to get me to say something to get them to turn on me that would suck so i'm nervous to go to lena/ruthie with this and 2) i dont think going to the end with ruthie and alex is smart so maybe im keeping my options open with nicole for selfish reasons bc i dont want to close that door just yet then today emmott came to me with receipts of alex telling emmott that i was aware of the fact that ruthie/alex were lying to emmott/issy about voting me out last vote and that i was just playing emmott (TRUE) and alex straight up told emmott about our alliance in a CLEARLYYYYYY transparent attempt of getting on emmotts good side for a jury vote by being honest and putting the blame on other people... AND I DIDNT LIKE THAT @ALEX!!!!!! if i just shut up and vote out emmott i'm guaranteed 4th place and from there i have to rely on my social game to take me to the end and get me a win because i've been playing this game but in a way that isn't easy to see on the surface and in a way that ORG juries dont want to hear about.. people want BIG MOVES but thats not smart everytime someone in this game tried to make a big move they were voted out.....I HATEEEEE THIS.... if i do try to make a move tonight i either get caught and get voted out 6th place or succeed at that move but piss everyone off and make a target of myself/lose jury votes.... but if i dont make a move tonight people will think im just this floater that helped hand ruthie or alex the game..... https://images.sobadsogood.com/21-gifs-proving-russia-is-the-most-bizarre-place-on-earth/3.jpg

Emmott

okay so i thought i had no hope this tribal! i was excited becuase i had this awesome speech prepared to drag everyone to hELL! but instead Saint Ruthie came to me <3 I actually love ruthie so much, we had a call and shes so precious and amazing and sweet and nice and caring and oMG!!!! I LOVE HER!!! AND SHE HAS AN AMAZING ACCENT! But she told me she is voting Lena, and she's gonna get other people to as well because Lena has an idol!! oooooooo honestly, lena is no threat to me, and i would probably usually go tell Lena that people are coming for her and to play her idol. but instead, im just gonna leave it this time, because it backfires 50% of the time. im just gonna leave the vote as lena, and let ruthie work her magic! another thing when issy left, i went on bit of a dramatic rant AHAHAH in the tribe chat AHAHAHHA saying she was robbed. and N*cole and L*na made snarky comments at me!!!! ew im perturbed! i hope this works tho wow imagine alex is also spilling all info and tea to me and putting blame on other people, so that he can vote me off and have my jury vote :)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) silly smart guy! if he didnt have immunity i think i could have got him out but yoloswag he has immunity and it's these people's fault who are going to get voted out by him and have to vote for him at f2/3 that are at fault. they never flipped with me earlier so I HOPE THAT THE DOOR HITS THEM ON THE WAY OUT (im lookin at u richie especially) okay bye

Ruthie

Today has been utter and complete CHAOS of the best kind.  I began the day with a message from Nicole asking if Emmott was okay, and I agreed, and Lena of course agreed too. And then in our The Family alliance chat the others seemed to want Emmott also.  So we were all agreed and it was all good, but then Alex privately brought up a good thought... Lena's idol.  We want it to be flushed so we could have a chance to play one next week but we didn't know how to go about flushing it.   Little did I know, Nicole decided to play the game and start throwing my name around.  (I STILL LOVE YOU NICOLE <3) and she told Richie- who in turn told Alex that Lena, Alex and myself were in an alliance together, which I'm not sure how she found that out, I'm guessing that Lena maybe told her.  Nicole had already warned us that we might be hearing things and I figured this kind of thing was what we might start hearing.   So, Alex told Lena (SO MUCH TELLING GOING ON, GOD.) some things to make her maybe want to use her idol tonight and we had this conversation: [11/29/16, 1:29:03 PM] Alex (Xalxe): and I have no time for it frankly, do you mind, we’ve been playing all game over here [11/29/16, 1:36:25 PM] Alex (Xalxe): Wait holy shit I just realize we can use this. I can give this to Lena instead of giving her your name and she might play the idol [11/29/16, 2:54:03 PM] Ruthie ❤: YES!!! That would be amazing!!! That's good thinking! [11/29/16, 2:54:34 PM] Ruthie ❤: How did Nicole know that you, me and Lena were together I wonder. [11/29/16, 2:55:18 PM] Alex (Xalxe): It is a mystery to me [11/29/16, 2:55:28 PM] Alex (Xalxe): who knows, she might just be grasping at straws [11/29/16, 2:56:40 PM] Alex (Xalxe): even a broken clock is right twice a day [11/29/16, 3:39:19 PM] Ruthie ❤: Omg, that's going to be my new favorite quote. <3 [11/29/16, 3:39:39 PM] Ruthie ❤: You're right though. [11/29/16, 3:39:58 PM] Ruthie ❤: In a way I'm excited she finally started playing but UGH [11/29/16, 4:05:10 PM] Ruthie ❤: LOL. Lena just messaged me to ask "hey, are we okay?" [11/29/16, 4:05:20 PM] Alex (Xalxe): Oh she got my mega-message then, good [11/29/16, 4:08:21 PM] Ruthie ❤: Yes good! Operation: Flush Idol is in action. [11/29/16, 4:08:49 PM] Alex (Xalxe): :) Then..... the chaos that led to my phone call with Emmott happened... [11/29/16, 4:09:30 PM] Ruthie ❤: She's writing me a mega message now. [11/29/16, 4:09:44 PM] Alex (Xalxe): okay if she sells me out she’s dead to me [11/29/16, 4:10:31 PM] Ruthie ❤: I can't wait to see what she says tbh [11/29/16, 4:10:50 PM] Ruthie ❤: I AM SO GLAD WE TRUST EACH OTHER. [11/29/16, 4:11:35 PM] Alex (Xalxe): This would be way harder if we didn't [11/29/16, 4:15:52 PM] Ruthie ❤: It would! [11/29/16, 4:16:09 PM] Ruthie ❤: And oh god, I have a lot of receipts for you. [11/29/16, 4:16:15 PM] Alex (Xalxe): oh boy oh boy [11/29/16, 4:17:01 PM] Ruthie ❤: I FEEL SO BAD SHOWING YOU BECAUSE I LOVE LENA SO MUCH, but you're my Alex so So of course I showed him all the receipts...  SORRY LENA.   :( [11/29/16, 4:08:18 PM] Lena McKenzie: I heard that you're worried about my loyalty :( [11/29/16, 4:08:29 PM] Lena McKenzie: But I have an idea... and I want to know what you think. [11/29/16, 4:10:39 PM] Lena McKenzie: I want to go to the final 3 with you and Nicole. I love Alex but none of us have ANY shot against him if he gets there, and that's not to say you or I or Nicole haven't played great games. He just has survived this entire game after being a target the entire time, came back, etc. I want one of the three of us to win. It would be great for Alex to win but I want one of us girls to win.. I know that sounds horrible but Alex really is calling all of the shots in our alliance and has been doing so the entire game. I really hope you don't say anything to him about this but I wanted to let you know that is what I'm thinking. I am loyal to the Old Farts and I am loyal to our alliance with Nicole, but Alex wins no matter who he is against at the end.. [11/29/16, 4:12:17 PM] Lena McKenzie: I honestly think you could win this if we go with Nicole. I want to win and I would happy with Nicole winning.. But I'm 98% sure you would win if we go to the end, and I would love to see you win. So after I told Alex we kind of came up with a brilliant idea. :)... [11/29/16, 4:29:16 PM] Ruthie ❤: Okay! Who should we tell Emmott to vote or is he voting me? -.- [11/29/16, 4:29:21 PM] Alex (Xalxe): I dunno man [11/29/16, 4:29:30 PM] Alex (Xalxe): I haven’t talked to him since this morning [11/29/16, 4:29:34 PM] Alex (Xalxe): tell him whatever [11/29/16, 4:31:41 PM] Ruthie ❤: I just messaged him and he replied quick but I don't even know what to tell him, lol. [11/29/16, 4:31:56 PM] Alex (Xalxe): shrug [11/29/16, 4:32:27 PM] Ruthie ❤: I'm just asking if he's voting me. [11/29/16, 4:42:53 PM] Alex (Xalxe): Can you get him to vote Lena?  Then she sees that people really are/were targeting her? [11/29/16, 4:44:36 PM] Ruthie ❤: Yeah, I could do that. I'm almost thinking I should vote with him, she wouldn't expect me to do it. Is that a crazy idea? [11/29/16, 4:44:46 PM] Alex (Xalxe): I was thinking the same thing don’t take my thing [11/29/16, 4:45:21 PM] Ruthie ❤: BRAIN TWINS. [11/29/16, 4:45:46 PM] Alex (Xalxe): Anyway yeah sure you go ahead and do that, we don’t want 3 votes on her accidentally [11/29/16, 4:45:51 PM] Alex (Xalxe): I’ll vote Emmott [11/29/16, 4:46:14 PM] Alex (Xalxe): Unless she starts talking about moving the vote away from Emmott in which case we can’t risk a split I AM SUCH A BAD PERSON, I do feel really guilty for this and I don't want Lena to go, and at this point I still wanted Emmott to go.  My next worry was how I could work a bit of magic on Emmott.  I love the boy dearly but he is SUCH a loose cannon, which has worked for him this far but I really didn't want anything I said to get out to him, and knowing him it probably would have... oops. I saw that he messaged me, and I finally answered... [11/29/16, 4:35:16 PM] emmott young: Well everyones saying my name so [11/29/16, 4:35:57 PM] emmott young: Im not even gonna try [11/29/16, 4:41:41 PM] Ruthie ❤: :( :( :( [11/29/16, 4:42:27 PM] emmott young: You just must feel very comfortable getting to the end with alex still in the game :/ [11/29/16, 4:42:40 PM] emmott young: Because I asked him, and he felt pretty comfortable having you around. [11/29/16, 4:50:35 PM] Ruthie ❤: If I vote with you for someone can you for once not say anything about it? BECAUSE I heard you told people we voted with you last time. :( [11/29/16, 4:52:13 PM] emmott young: Of course omg!! It's not like you exactly stuck to your word either, though. Last time, I only didnt vote Richie because once Richie went it was definitely going to be me and issy next. Alex told me you had no intention on voting richie! But ill do anything at this point, i swear! [11/29/16, 4:54:27 PM] Ruthie ❤: Okay, whew! Who do you want to vote if you could vote for anyone? (Besides Alex since he's immune.) [11/29/16, 4:55:11 PM] emmott young: Anyone!! Whoever you wanted! ...before pondering over what to do for almost an hour before I finally had the brilliant idea of calling him!  If we talked on the phone I could sound more sincere about it all and more importantly he couldn't show the receipts to anyone else.  And also, I figured that MAYBE it could get me a vote from him in the jury... I must admit.  I'm such a bad person, I can't even, I feel more and more like a villain each day, oh well.   [11/29/16, 5:19:05 PM] emmott young: Do you have any one in mind? [11/29/16, 5:28:11 PM] Ruthie ❤: Can I call you?  I don’t want to type it out because somehow what I tell you always seems to find it’s way around the house.  :O :O <3 [11/29/16, 5:28:41 PM] emmott young: Of course ahahah! I promise I wont snitch! [11/29/16, 5:29:10 PM] Ruthie ❤: Whew, okay!  Hang on! [11/29/16, 5:29:20 PM] emmott young: Hanging! So I called Emmott and OH MY GOSH Y'ALL.  HE is so adorable, I can't even with him, HIS ACCENT IS SO CUTE!  And he liked mine too!  And I'm literally always so awkward with people on the phone, SO awkward but talking to Emmott was easy and I admit it, I probably told him WAY TOO MUCH.  First I made him promise not to tell anyone that I told him to do this but to vote Lena and I gave him my word that I would vote her too.  And I made him promise not to freak out and go around telling people that I was voting for her and that he needed another vote or two, to just let me handle it, and he promised.  He is literally so sweet, he told me he was going to ignore everyone on messenger and I feel like such a bitch right now for doing ALL of this.  Lena trusted me with ALL of that and I ran to Alex.  Then I went to Emmott and told him I was going to try to keep him when obviously I'm just spending all this time writing my confessional, whoops. Oh... and on call I also might have let it slip that Lena had an idol.  Which is also another dumb move on my part because Emmott can't keep a secret to save his life.  Anyway, that's where I am today.  I'm personally sitting in a good spot and I can't wait for a bit of chaos to ensue when Lena learns that TWO people voted for her...  tonight's tribal is going to be so much fun! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH LENA AND EMMOTT, I'm so sorry when you guys read this.  <3 ALSO I'M SORRY FOR ALL THE DENYING I'M GOING TO DO WHEN YOU SEE THAT SOMEONE ELSE VOTED FOR YOU QUEEN LENA.