#EffortlessWriting

[consistency-1820]

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[journalofherry]

Why My Dreams Didn't Come True?

Monday, April/10th 2017 I am completely grateful for the decision to deactivate my FB account during more than 30 days in along March 2017 last month! That was totally true that it could decluttered my mind! Another side positive impact was I am not interested anymore to chat more on an instant messaging group chatting such as Whatsapp, Line, and Telegram! Somehow, I felt the conversations distracted my productivity! The huge good things when I deactivated FB was that I had more time to do ERIC (Evaluation, Reflection, Introspection, and Contemplation). One of which pop up in my mind is: "Why My Dreams Didn't Come True?" I am digging it deeply right now. I wish, there is more enlighment from the review! Wish me luck! :) #JanganKasihKendor #MenulisMenggelinding #MenulisTanpaBeban #MorningWriting #WritingForTheraphy #NoDistractionWriting #EffortlessWriting

[journalofherry]

Do I Suffer Split Personality Disorder?

Thursday, March/02nd 2017 After watching "Split" movie, I was wondering whether I am of the one. Each single individual has their life secret personality. Even our personality is mystery it self. For some reasons, I felt that I have another personality in my self. Two different extreme personalities inside me, even more. The good news is, the personalities can control their self proportionally. Am I down with the circumstance? Not really. I learn to enjoy the life, no matter what happened. Absolutely, I completely realize that life is imperfect. Most of our action under subsconcious mind. Sometimes, we can not control our self. It happened just the way it is. But, to convince that the personalities keep on the track, I always do ERIC (Evaluation, Reflection, Introspection, and Contemplation) frequently and routinely. Because, in my personal belief that just because we are imperfect, does not mean we do not do anything to fix it. There are bunch of room for self improvement. We should nurture our growth mindset. Furtermore, I have a life principle that be a better version of you each single day is a mandatory. So, no matter what happened in my personality whether I am suffering split personality disorder or not, I just accept... enjoy... and improve the life continously each single day! #JanganKasihKendor #MenulisMenggelinding #MenulisTanpaBeban #MorningWriting #EffortlessWriting #NoDistractionWriting #WritingForTheraphy

[journalofherry]

Do I Suffer Split Personality Disorder?

Thursday, March/02nd 2017 After watching "Split" movie, I was wondering whether I am of the one. Each single individual has their life secret personality. Even our personality is mystery it self. For some reasons, I felt that I have another personality in my self. Two different extreme personalities inside me, even more. The good news is, the personalities can control their self proportionally. Am I down with the circumstance? Not really. I learn to enjoy the life, no matter what happened. Absolutely, I completely realize that life is imperfect. Most of our action under subsconcious mind. Sometimes, we can not control our self. It happened just the way it is. But, to convince that the personalities keep on the track, I always do ERIC (Evaluation, Reflection, Introspection, and Contemplation) frequently and routinely. Because, in my personal belief that just because we are imperfect, does not mean we do not do anything to fix it. There are bunch of room for self improvement. We should nurture our growth mindset. Furtermore, I have a life principle that be a better version of you each single day is a mandatory. So, no matter what happened in my personality whether I am suffering split personality disorder or not, I just accept... enjoy... and improve the life continously each single day! #JanganKasihKendor #MenulisMenggelinding #MenulisTanpaBeban #MorningWriting #EffortlessWriting #NoDistractionWriting #WritingForTheraphy

[journalofherry]

Tuesday, February/21st 2017 Ini gue banget! Gue meyakini kenapa tetiba mata ini nemuin foto ini di Instagram, gegara "Law of Attraction"! Ya, I have my own resolution this year to write a book berjudul: "30 Something Guide". Buku panduan bagi Millenial Dewasa (1980-1985) yang merasa pencapaian hidupnya tampak "biasa-biasa-saja". Dan foto ini ngena banget! Lima point di atas itu beneran gue banget, di masa lalu, yang gue menyadari benar kalo itu penyebab gue hari ini! Gue dulu emang type orang yang "Trying to please everyone". Dan gue baru mencoba lepas dari bayang-bayang orang lain sekitar 2006. Ya, nggak total "sembuh". Sampai tahun 2016 gue masih ada mental "trying to please everyone"-nya. Gue juga dulu emang type orang yang "Fearing change" alias takut perubahan. Gue baru menyukai konsep-konsep perubahan sekitar tahun 2001 waktu masuk dunia kampus. Ya, sampai tahun 2016 sih masih ada mental "fearing change"-nya, tapi kadarnya udah menurun banget. Terus, gue dulu juga emang type orang yang "Living the past". Sekitar 2010 gue mulai berontak dari perangkap masa lalu. Ini tahun ke-7 gue mencoba menanggalkan masa lalu. Ya, masih ada sih godaan untuk nostalgia kembali. Tapi, itu bukan pilihan bijak. "Putting your self down" itu struggling gue saat remaja menjelang dewasa (baca: masuk dunia kampus) sekitar 1998. Sebagai korban bullying saat kecil bahkan hingga remaja, bagi gue sebuah perjuangan untuk menjadi pribadi asertif (nggak ekstrim kanan submissif dan nggak ekstrim kiri agressif) nan egaliterian (nggak memosisikan diri inferior, tapi juga gak ketinggian jadi superior). Nah, ini sangat gue banget dulu: "Overthinking"! Perpaduan pengalaman hidup sebagai anak bungsu yang segala keinginan terpenuhi... bintang kelas dari SD hingga SMA... ber-type kepribadian melankolis dan perfeksionis... gue ngerasa "lebay" dalam berpikir. Bagusnya, semenjak mutusin sebagai wirausaha tahun 2012, gue mulai "tobat" dalam hal "Overthinking". EPILOG Apapun yang terjadi, gue tetep bersyukur, gue masih dikasih kesempatan buat menata diri kembali untuk kesekian kali. Uniknya, gue masih inget aja gitu tahun demi tahun kapan gue begitu termasuk kapan gue insyaf-nya sampe akhirnya mutusin buat memperbaiki diri. Kalo gue telusuri kuncinya satu: berani "menelanjangi diri". Caranya? Sering-seringlah berpayung sunyi dan beralas sepi dengan berdialog diri bersama teman-teman setia bernama ERIK ("Evaluasi", "Refleksi", "Introspeksi", dan "Kontemplasi"). #JanganKasihKendor #MenulisMenggelinding #MenulisTanpaBeban #WritingForTheraphy #MorningWriting #EffortlessWriting #NoDistractionWriting

[journalofherry]

I Was Blind Optimistic One

Tuesday, May/02nd 2017

I read already just now #Unstoppable book by Ilman Akbar, one of my senior at Startup Lokal community.

One of my cup of tea is “Blind Optimistic” concept.

It refers to anybody who being optimistic, but they are “blind” that the reality is still far from the ideal one.

The “Blind Optimistic” ones are also afraid of the toughest life reality and poorly they don’t have a courage to take action to fix it!

Being pessimistic definitely you already lost even when in still in the mind.

But being optimistic without taking action is also will lose, because however you need to solve the problem.

Anyway… the “Blind Optimistic” sounds familiar in my past life… :D

#JanganKasihKendor #MenulisTanpaBeban #MenulisMenggelinding #WritingForTheraphy #NoDistractionWriting #EffortlessWriting #NightWriting #WritingWithAPurpose

[journalofherry]

2 Factors Why My Dreams Did Not Come True

Tuesday, April/11th 2017 After a long day, I did contemplate more yesterday, I found that there were two big factors why my dreams did not come true. (1) FOCUS Yeah, this is common thing in my life. Indeed I was un-focus person. I have too many dreams to pursue. I did not have main-ultimate-dream. Even if I had one, it changed frequently. Let's decide what is your one thing.... (2) ACTION Another my huge mistake was I did not take action. Most of my life experiences in the past ran contrarily with my dream. It means that my action did not match with my dream! You know what that was the reason why my action did not "arrive" to a destination that I call by: "A DREAM". Anything else? #JanganKasihKendor #MenulisTanpaBeban #MenulisMenggelinding #MorningWriting #WritingForTheraphy #NoDistractionWriting #EffortlessWriting

[journalofherry]

In-denial Mentality (Part 2 - End)

Tuesday, March/21st 2017

Ini kalimat yang gue suka pada point tersebut:

“…happy people don’t pretend they are doing well when they are suffering. They wear their emotions on their sleeve so that others are on notice–aware that the person is going through difficult times and may need assistance.”

Sempat terlintas di pikiran gue, apa karena gue over hard-core dalam aplikasiin konsep The Secret dalam hidup gue sejak 2010?

Bukankah bahkan dalam satu tahun pertama penerapan The Secret pada 2011 sudah ada beberapa catatan evaluasi?

Haruskah gue evaluasi kembali teori The Secret untuk yang kesekian kali?

Jadi begini… dalam konsep The Secret dicontohkan bahwa ketika kita dalam keadaan susah atau bermasalah, kita diajarkan untuk berpura2 semuanya baik-baik saja.

Karena bersikap bahwa “kita-lagi-bermasalah” malah bisa menarik masalah demi masalah yang lain.

Namun, dalam buku lanjutannya “The Power”, kita juga diajarkan untuk tetap proporsional kalau memang “kita-lagi-bermasalah” dan harus memecahkan masalah itu.

Nah, gue keknya kurang proporsional deh, sehingga menjadi pribadi yang in-denial sehingga seolah-olah “baik-baik-saja”.

Bukti nyatanya in-denial adalah seperti yang udah gue sebut di bagian pertama bahwa, it’s oke gue bersikap seolah-olah “baik-baik-saja”, tetapi… gue seharusnya wajib BERTINDAK bahwa memang gue lagi bermasalah.

Lantaran in-denial mentality, menurut gue, lebih ke menolak sama sekali bahwa kita “baik-baik-aja” dan tindakan kita nggak mengarah pada penyelesaian masalah!

Gue suka ending di bagian point pada tulisan tadi:

“Happy people allow space for themselves to experience whatever thoughts and feelings are happening. They observe these thoughts and feelings without feeling the need to judge or condemn themselves for not feeling great.”

SEKIAN

#JanganKasihKendor #MenulisMenggelinding #MenulisTanpaBeban #MorningWriting #WritingForTheraphy #NoDistractionWriting #EffortlessWriting

[journalofherry]

In-denial Mentality (Part 1 of 2)

Monday, March/20th 2017 Semakin kemari, gue semakin mengerti kenapa gue begini dan begitu. Keputusan gue deactivate Facebook emang ngebuat lebih banyak punya waktu buat berkaca diri (gue sekarang lebih suka menamainya dengan istilah: "Nurturing My Self"). Ya, semenjak baca bukunya "What The Most Successful People Do Before Breakfast"-nya Laura Vanderkam, morning ritual gue cukup berubah drastis! Aktivitas-aktivitas yang gue lakuin sebelum jam 12 siang dari jam 5 pagi berbau tiga: 1. Nurturing My Career 2. Nurturing My Family 3. Nurturing My Self Dari situ gue banyak berkaca diri... ngelakuin self talk... dan jatuh pada titik perenungan: "Am I in-denial mentality...?" Entah mengapa, gue ngerasa selama bertahun-tahun banyak melakukan "in-denial" seolah2 "baik-baik-aja" hidup gue. Padahal... ya gue juga manusia biasa yang punya masalah kehidupan! Nah, the next problem is... gue keknya nggak mencurahkan 100 persen buat fokus untuk nyelesein ini masalah! Gue ngerasa masih berleha-leha... (parameter sederhananya masih berlama-lama di Facebook secara nggak produktif!), masih ngelakuin aktivitas yang sebenernya gak nurturing my self... dan masih berjibaku dalam kehidupan di masa lalu... (kadang gue mikir, apakah gue prokastinator akut?!). Padahal, orang-orang yang berbahagia itu menurut Inc. edisi March 16, 2017 pada tulisannya "10 Things Happy People Don't Do When Life Becomes Difficult" (sila googling sendiri!), point pertamanya adalah: "They don't pretend that nothing is wrong and that everything is fine." BERSAMBUNG #JanganKasihKendor #MenulisMenggelinding #MenulisTanpaBeban #WritingForTheraphy #MorningWriting #EffortlessWriting #NoDistractionWriting

[journalofherry]

A Sleeping Wolf

Sunday, March/12th 2017 Each of us has a "wolf" inside the soul. You need to notice which one "wolf" that you always feed. The "wolf" is completely beast. It can change your basic personality. Even it can destroy your self.... Beware of the "wolf" inside you. It was created to become your survival weapon. But, to feed it unproportionally can destroy your life. Use the "wolf" wisely. You need to educate and control it. Because, its work depends on your intelligent. Once you can't control it, your life is going to be exhausted.... So many people were defeated by the "wolf". I wish you are not the next victim! Anyway, the "wolf" is your lust.... #JanganKasihKendor #MenulisMenggelinding #MenulisTanpaBeban #MorningWriting #EffortlessWriting #NoDistractionWriting #WritingForTheraphy

[journalofherry]

Sesal Melantai

Wednesday, March/08th 2017 Apa benar, menyesal itu dilarang? Personally, as long as the regret is proportional, please do that. Misal: seorang ibu teledor, sampe akhirnya sang anak kesiram air panas di dapur karena dia lalai menjaga sang buah hati main-main ke sana sendiran. Apa iya, menyesal dalam kasus itu dilarang? Baiklah, segala sesuatu ada hikmahnya. Tapi, apa iya, pemantik dari mengapa hikmah itu bisa mencuat, nggak boleh disesali? Kalo misal kita udah bisa dapetin hikmah tanpa pemantik tersebut dan tentu saja tanpa sesal yang melantai, apakah tidak lebih baik? So, gue type orang yang proporsional, sih. Selama penyesalan kadarnya wajar dan berdampak pada perubahan perilaku, ya harus kita lakukan. Jadi, nggak mesti ekstrem: "Nggak-menyesal-sama-sekali". Kalo kasusnya anak yang kesiram air panas tadi, beneran kita (yang misal jadi Emak-nya) kagak nyesel sama sekali karena nggak jaga sang buah hati baik-baik? To be honest ya, gue lagi dalam fase penyesalan yang teramat dalam karena produktivitas terganggu parah gara-gara teralihkan dengan Facebook. But, well, I am not typically person who blame anybody or anything. Ini lebih kepada gue-nya aja yang kurang terkontrol dalam menggunakan FB dengan tidak proporsional. So, hasil perenungan mendalam almost one month dengan tindak lanjut me-non-aktif-kan FB secara sementara, I got plenty of enlightenment​s! Hingga menyentuh pertanyaan mendasar: "Why did you use Facebook?" Thank God, eventually I am illuminated with my own ERIC (Evaluation, Reflection, Introspection, and Contemplation). You know what, during 8 years Facebook-an, baru kali ini gue dengan rela de-activate my Facebook! Again, thank God... my decision was true! #JanganKasihKendor #MenulisMenggelinding #MenulisTanpaBeban #MorningWriting #WritingForTheraphy #EffortlessWriting #NoDistractionWriting

[journalofherry]

Laboratory of Life

Tuesday, March/07th 2017 Personally, life is laboratory which I can do experiment and do trial and error to sculpt the best version of me. Formerly when I was teenager that I was fearing change. Indeed, to live in comfort zone is a toxic and potentially will kill you! We need to create the uncomfort zone to explode our deepest potential. Moreover only in uncomfort zone, you will learn something to grow your personality. Yeah, we need to be strick even to our own self! Definitely, work hard always works! Just because you were born on "red carpet" does not mean you ignore to work hard. Work hard is a must. We have to realize, to be humble and at the same time to be hustle takes time. So guys, create your own uncomfort zone... always work hard... and last but not least, you will keep hustle and humble! Happy fighting! :) #JanganKasihKendor #MenulisMenggelinding #MenulisTanpaBeban #MorningWriting #WritingForTheraphy #EffortlessWriting #NoDistractionWriting

[journalofherry]

Welcome Home!

Monday, March/06th 2017 "Home is where the heart is". That is my status on FB after seeing LION movie. You know what, the best part of my life is when I can go home and I can stay there for a long time. At least some days until one week. Personally, my parent's house is burst of positive aura to do recovery my life especially for my spiritual one. Even though my parent's house is more than 30 years old, but I always comfortable with the circumstance. But, I have to choose. Perhaps, next month I will come back to stay in Jakarta permanently during one year for a new endeavour at a big telecommunication corporate as a Manager. I decide to stay at an apartment in Menteng or Thamrin. I just revealed the life plan to my beloved mom just now. Thank God, she permitted me to stay there. This is my dream job. And the corporate is my bucket list since 2010. I am completely grateful for the opportunity to join the corporate! One year learning. And the destiny enstrong my belief that actually we have not to look for a job, but the job is. Welcome a new hat as a startup enthusiast! P.S. So sorry, I can not reveal more the exact position and the corporate's name! Wait and see in the beginning of April 2017! :) #JanganKasihKendor #MenulisMenggelinding #MenulisTanpaBeban #MorningWriting #WritingForTheraphy #EffortlessWriting #NoDistractionWriting

[journalofherry]

Stay-cation

Sunday, February/05th 2017 Aha! Suddenly an idea pop up in my mind that I need to feel the experience to stay at a hotel every month! I called the program with "Stay-cation" (combination "Stay" and "Vacation"). So, the idea is that I stay only one night at a hotel either for my business trip or for my monthly review (yeah, I need comfortable venue include to appreciate my work hard at the month). I can check in on Saturday day and check out on Sunday day. This is the leisure program to enrich my experiences particularly to enstrong my "Law Of Attraction" to live better. For the recapitulation of my "stay-cation" list previously: 1. January: nothing 2. February: Amaris Hotel Tebet 3. March: Vio Hotel Cihampelas Yeah, it is kinda a "warming up" before literally I live in my own house at Pondok Indah or Menteng. It is time to feel the experience to live at hotel four star and five star! #JanganKasihKendor #MenulisMenggelinding #MenulisTanpaBeban #MorningWriting #WritingForTheraphy #NoDistractionWriting #EffortlessWriting

[journalofherry]

30 Hari Tanpa Facebook. Bagaimana Rasanya?

Tuesday, February/28th 2017

“Thank you for being my friends during 8 years. It is time to take a rest for a while….”

Itu merupakan postingan terakhir saya di Facebook pada Senin, 27-Februari-2017 malam sebelum menonton “Jakarta Undercover” di Mega Mall Bekasi.

Entah, ada perasaan bersalah yang mendalam sehingga menggiring saya untuk “de-activate” akun Facebook, seenggaknya 30 hari mendatang sebagai percobaan.

In case, I could live without FB more than 30 days, why will not I continue the program?

Saya mulai membuka akun FB pada 16-February-2009 di Jakarta. Which is, 2017 is my eight (8) years using FB!

Hasil evaluasi beberapa minggu sebelumnya menguak bahwa saya ngerasa hidup kurang produktif selama 8 tahun terakhir.

Apalagi semenjak membaca buku “The One Things” pada tahun 2013.

Saya merasa, ada yang salah dengan cara saya menggunakan FB….

Melalui FB, saya pernah pada fase:

1. ALAY Yeah, “Alay” is actually life phase of human. Hehehehehehe. Saya pernah pada fase kehidupan ber-FB, ingin “kelihatan”.

Tetiba saya khilaf, that this is not what FB for!

2. OVER SHOW UP Nggak tau kenapa, rentang 2009-2011, saya ngerasa terlalu berlebihan dalam hal “pamer” di FB.

Baiklah, saya sepakat dengan pernyataan Mbak Riana Bismarak (Founder & CEO BelowCepek) bahwa FB memang dirancang untuk “pamer”. Hehehehehe.

But, eventually I realised that my “pamer” is not elegant!

3. RASIS To be honest, basically I was racist since 1998-2006. During 8 years (the number sounds familiar), I was a racist person.

Fortunately, semenjak ber-FB, kadar rasis-nya sudah mulai berkurang, tapi tetap kerasa! Which is not good!

4. UN-EMPHATY Baiklah, bagi sebagian orang personal branding saya di FB adalah “anak-muda-asal-daerah-yang-sukses” (sebagian ada yang nyebut “Eksekutif Muda” dan “Sosialita”! Hahahahaha).

But, was it emphaty to show up frequently your success life on FB?

Don’t you realize that your status hurted them on FB especially for mediocre people?

5. OVER (PERSONAL) BRANDING The latest one was actually my basic consideration why I decided to de-activate my FB last night.

To be honest, I was discomfortable that some people thought that my life was bloody lucky.

Dude, I am still up and down up to now!

Yeah, I am a bastard lucky person and my mistake was too expose this lukiness on FB.

Eventually, I realised that my “Perceptual Quality” is overrated. They did not know my “Actual Quality”. Foolishly, I enjoyed it best! What the fuck!

EPILOG I am still on the process to be better person each single day. I am still struggling to make my dreams come true one by one. I am still nobody who still fight to be somebody.

And my posts on FB made people did misperception about my life achievement.

I need to take a rest more for a while. To talk with my own inner self honestly. Give me opportunity to evaluate, reflect, introspect, and contemplate my FB life….

#JanganKasihKendor #MenulisTanpaBeban #MenulisMenggelinding #WritingForTheraphy #EffortlessWriting #NoDistractionWriting #MorningWriting

[journalofherry]

The Biggest Distractor Goes To... (Part 2 - End)

Monday, February/27th 2017

I am extremely happy being a flexible and adjustable person.

For me, life is a laboratory.

We need to do trial and error more to discover fit personal growth program.

I completely enjoy the process. Because I believe that life is talking about growing your self.

Anyway, lemme continue my opinion why media social and instant messaging are the biggest distractor of our productivity.

After doing “Timeline Walk”, we tend to open several interesting topic on our friend’s update status.

Perhaps only a text status (their personal status or shared news) or even video one.

But in my experience, as if I have to accomplish to read or watch them immediately at the time!

It reminds me to Stephen “7 Habits” Covey concept namely: “Urgent, but un-important activity.”

The next bad habit, mostly I saved them, but I never open them again for a long time!

You know what, that was the seed of procastination mentality in my self… :(

So, I started to change my mindset how to use media social and instant messaging more wisely.

But, compared instant messaging, I feel that social media particularly Facebook, bloody distract my productivity.

And you know what, 2017 is my eight (8) years use Facebook.

Was my productivity distructed during eight years…?!

I think so…. :(

It is time for me to say: “Good bye, Facebook….”

#JanganKasihKendor #MenulisMenggelinding #MenulisTanpaBeban #WritingForTheraphy #MorningWriting #EffortlessWriting #NoDistractionWriting