#ESPECIALLY when it comes to sazh and his relationship with snow and serah

[givelightningherharem]

I still love the thought of sazh being who serah and snow turn to when they have a child and need help. whenever they begin to panic about smth, they call sazh for his input, he’s a blessing for these new parents because he went through it all with dajh

speaking of whom, dajh is THE BEST big brother figure for the baby, I imagine he’s a couple years older by the time serah and snow have a baby so he’s a little more responsible, and he loves holding/bottle feeding the baby, playing with the baby, and his overall relationship with their child stays like that as they get older

in conclusion, sazh is an amazing father who will be there to help snow and serah with their child, and dajh is gonna be right behind him to be the best big brother he can be

[edenfelled]

This headcanon was originally posted on @rosafulmen ! I have tidied it up for this blog.

no one look at me, i am having brainrot for a FFX failed!guardian lightning. she became a guardian for serah who desperately wanted to defeat sin, but she was ultimately unable to protect her when the time came. despite that, her skill and expertise in guardianship is second to none, and other summoners seek her out to try and assist their parties.

i've attached some other thoughts below the cut.

claire and serah grew up in luca after being orphaned at a young age. although the port doesn't have a dedicated temple, much of the people who assisted the girls during this time ( at least until claire was old enough ) were yevonites, which helped serah instil a firm belief in the religion. i don't think claire ever held an overtly negative opinion to the church, she just... didn't see the point in praying to a god who implied the reason their parents died was the result of them not being 'pure' enough. she also quickly picked up the dichotomy of acceptable and unacceptable machina, even if she wasn't allowed to talk about it.

claire joined the crusaders as soon as they would take her, mostly working odd jobs around the city. like the guardian corps, this gave her the ability to provide for her sister at the cost of her time. serah met snow during this time — and up-and-coming blizball star for the luca goers — and began to seriously consider becoming a summoner.

this was also the time where claire changed her name to lightning. it likely started as a codename she adopted and was reinforced during the pilgrimage, especially after journeying through the thunder plains.

lightning returned home as soon as she learned of her sister's plan and the two got into a massive argument. serah would not budge on her plans despite her outrage, and snow was fully prepared to drop his blizball career in order to support her. not only did lightning not approve of their relationship but she was convinced snow would get her killed. she became a guardian only to show them both how stupid the idea was.

serah attends her first temple, gains her fayth and the pilgrimage begins. there's also huge opportunity for the other cast to integrate here. maybe sazh lost his son and became a guardian for him, or maybe fang/vanille were another prototype dream before tidus? no matter who, they journey the land until they finally reach zanarkand.

serah ends up choosing snow to be her final aeon due to the love they held for each other ( i vibe with the idea that he promised to marry her after she got the aeon and... well. ) and the knowledge that lightning would completely reject yunalesca's truth. this means lightning was not privy to what went on inside the room of the fayth — she saw two enter and one leave.

i don't really know if my personal ship for snow / lightning applies in this verse but it can go one of two ways. whether she secretly loves him or she's finally accepted him as being worthy for serah, he sacrifices himself for what is ultimately a few years of peace. this nearly leads her to attack yunalesca, only for serah to intervene and remind her that all their work is for nothing if they die.

in the end, though they reached sin, serah was struck down before she could complete the ritual and dies in lightning's arms. no one really blamed lightning for being unable to protect her; the life of a summoner and her guardians is a perilous one, safety is not guaranteed, and a guardian can do everything they can and it still not be enough. lightning could not protect serah from sin itself. all it did was instil in her the senselessness of the pilgrimage.

with nowhere else to go, lightning returns to luca where she is constantly propositioned by summoners looking for an experienced guardian. she rejects every single one until yuna.

auron specifically sought her out after serah's death. as the both of them were products of a malignant belief, they vowed to undo the cycle. this means that lightning wouldn't say anything about the final aeon, despite knowing a guardian would have to die, and wouldn't interject when the others were offering themselves during zanarkand. I don't know (?) if she would know he was unsent, but it ultimately wouldn't matter to her.

i also have two ideas for snow's fayth. one, light buries it somewhere in zanarkand and gives up the location to yuna after they defeat yunalesca. though he would not be her final aeon, she is able to ensure his death wasn't for nothing and he could assist yuna during the fight with sin — ultimately freeing him and avenging serah. two, she's had it on her the whole time and basically does the same thing minus leading them to the fayth. if a baby seymour can carry anima around before a temple, so can she.

[aloice-talks-about-games]

The Hoperai Salt Masterpost, OR: Hope deserved better in Lightning Returns.txt

I’m not going to put this under the Hoperai tag because yes, it is ship salt... I am aware that Hope has his own flaws and problems as well in LR (that warrants a whole other masterpost by itself) so the salt doesn’t just go to Lightning, but I’m going to focus on Lightning in this post. 

Thesis: Hoperai is a great ship that can, under certain circumstances, work out (and work out beautifully!) in the post-LR new world, but it has a lot of issues within Lightning Returns and I highly, highly doubt that Lightning reciprocated Hope’s feelings within LR, or even treated him well as a friend, partner or surrogate family member.

I’m going to address this in three and a half parts, with the parts discussing  Lightning’s knowledge, Lightning’s heart/compassion, Lightning’s plans and possible dev intentions respectively.

Part One. Lightning’s Knowledge

Argument: Lightning doesn’t show a lot of care RE: Hope’s well-being in Lightning Returns because she couldn’t tell he was in a lot of trouble.

Answer: uhhhhh, about that.

In the beginning of LR, Hope shows confusion about who he is or why he’s at the Ark, saying:

Of course Lightning is also a little dazed at this point since she also just woke up, but at least she knows her terms with Bhunivelze, while Hope doesn’t seem to be aware of his. She doesn’t think or comment much about Hope’s confusion (or his suddenly-child-again-form, or why he, as the most human-oriented of the entire XIII cast who was the only cast member in XIII-2 to not be granted time travel by Etro, is suddenly serving God) and simply goes on as if it’s normal. Perhaps this is because she doesn’t yet have reason to think that Bhunivelze means ill towards the two of them (she did serve Etro willingly, after all) - so let’s give her the benefit of the doubt for this one.

She does learn about what actually happened to the adult Hope she knew from Vanille (mysteriously disappeared from the world 169 years ago before ending up in his current situation with no memories of anything), but makes no comments about it.

She also has this conversation with Snow regarding how odd it is that Hope is barred from leaving the Ark to do things such as talking to Snow (which, from the tone of this conversation, both Snow and Hope would enjoy), but doesn’t comment on it.

She also makes no comments about this.

She acknowledges and feels hurt that he has forgotten, but doesn’t think about why that may have happened.

Here she learns that even Hope’s colleagues have no idea what happened despite wanting him back, but no comments either.

She also doesn’t say anything when he blatantly talks about dying.

She also doesn’t seem to catch on the meaning of this (”It’s really nearing the end now. Soon it will be over.”) being Hope’s existence will also be over.

Sure, we can argue that Lightning is just not the most astute of people and these hints all flew over her head. But then there’s the nail on the coffin:

If she didn’t know before, Lumina’s forced her to know now - that Hope is wrong somehow and that to achieve her goals might mean turning on him and killing him. Which, of course, is fine if Hope is a fake - but where is the real Hope then, the one she knew she cared for and could trust, and shouldn’t she care about saving him, since she puts so much effort into saving everyone else and tries to save even Caius?

Or, alternatively, if she believes the real Hope is dead/gone, shouldn’t she show some sign of grief or disappointment over it?

This is the first and only time in LR Lightning explicitly discusses the problems with Hope before Hope’s final farewell; she does not talk about (her thoughts on) him to anyone otherwise.

Part II. Lightning’s Heart/Compassion

That brings us to our second point.

Argument: Lightning’s a fine companion to Hope during LR. If she was cold to him, it’s because her heart (Lumina) was missing, so you can’t fault her for that, and she’s cold towards everyone, really, it’s just a part of her character.

Answer: uhhhhh, about that.

Let’s put aside her lack of reaction towards all the alarming stuff covered in Part I for now (especially the part where her heart, Lumina, seems particularly sardonic in tone while grilling her about the possibility of killing Hope). Let’s just look at the moments when Lightning showed she was perfectly capable of compassion in LR, even to street NPCs.

To the boy playing Serah’s theme (I think) in Yusnaan, she makes a remark that shows caring for Snow:

She shows empathy regarding the ghosts of the murdered women in Luxerion, wishing to save them despite knowing she had no powers over the dead:

She is quite unhappy about that one fireworks guy’s story in Yusnaan:

We know how emotional she got in person with Snow:

She understands Luka’s pain about crying solely for others:

She helps the girl who claims that she used to be a chocobo despite agreeing that it’s logically absurd:

She quite obviously cares for Sazh and Dajh:

And so on and so forth (too many screenshots.)

In short, Lightning’s perfectly capable of caring and worrying for others, especially her friends and allies. She even muses about love and dependence, but those thoughts are purely introspective, making no mentions of Hope even though he could fit right into them:

She explicitly wonders if she’s unable to love. She likely comes around to the idea by the end - I’m in no way against Hoperai post LR, I’ve written fics on it - but here, she isn’t there yet, and her thoughts don’t even drift to Hope when she thinks about her feelings (even though mutual dependence is like, basically the nature of her relationship with Hope in LR).

Now, her lack of action or commentary regarding Hope’s impending problems with Bhunivelze notwithstanding, (and Hope deliberately trying to mislead her into not trusting him notwithstanding - that still doesn’t explain why she wasn’t more upset and proactive with either him or the “real” Hope, though,) she also snaps at Hope a whole lot. Of course Hope goes overboard with protectiveness and I’ve also heard that some of it is due to the translation from Japanese to English, but just look at this.

She isn’t very subtle when she lies to him about trusting him, even though she was trying to keep her agenda secret:

She basically blows up on him when he circumvents a lot in his explanation of where Serah might have gone, and doesn’t say anything even after in response he makes the extremely morbid promise to look for Serah and reunite the sisters after his own death:

And, of course, even though Hope sounds absolutely dejected with this line, no investigations or words of comfort either:

Part III. Lightning’s Plan

Argument: Lightning did all of that above because it didn’t matter, she had a plan and she saved him in the end.

Answer: I don’t like thinking of “murder” as a plan.

Lightning makes a vague mention of a “last resort” when talking to Lumina. The problem... this occurs right before the conversation regarding killing Hope, which then means

1) Her “last resort” involves willingly killing Hope (which really does not show her care for his well-being) OR

2) She knows Hope’s going to end up needing to be saved somehow (in which case she’s... basically waiting for the end to happen, and risking the success of saving him in the process) OR

3) This is strictly talking about her ability to fight Bhunivelze and has nothing to do with Hope (which also doesn’t help our case RE: caring about Hope).

I’m inclined to think she didn’t really have much of a plan, going by how shocked she seemed to be at their final conversation:

She straight up admits that she’s not been the greatest with him even just as a friend and partner.

... And even when she goes to fight Bhuni it seems to be more about Serah and the world than about Hope.

And this is not even going into how Lightning feels about Bhuni’s more lewd words to her in JPN, which she definitely knows to have come from Hope because she tells Bhuni that his downfall is due to having a human’s heart within him...

Part III.1/2 Possible Dev Intentions

Now, perhaps a lot of these happened the way they did because the devs 1) didn’t want Hoperai to become “too” canon (due to pedophilia reasons and to keep Lightning open for fandom to ship her with others) or 2) wanted to keep Hope’s problems mostly a surprise until the end. However, I’d argue that you can easily still do 1) while showing Lightning to care about him even just as a friend (asking him if he has any theories of his own on why he ended up the way he did at the beginning, for example; Hope doesn’t even have to answer correctly, but just showing her asking shows that she cares). As for 2)... I’m really upset with the Lumina scene LOL if they’re going to be so explicit about Lightning having to (at least try to) kill Hope, then why don’t they give us a single throwaway line where either Lightning OR Lumina considers some kind of alternative? They really don’t talk about saving him at all before they actually do save him, while everyone else (Sazh, Snow, Vanille, Noel) etc all have a lead up section where Lightning contemplates how she used to know them and how they may have been affected by everything that’s happened. As LR was made by the devs, we skipped any potential thoughts Lightning could have had regarding Hope’s adult life, his feelings of abandonment, and extremely difficult leadership for hundreds of years. It would have been so interesting to read. But we didn’t get any of that - and nothing explicitly romantic from Lightning, either. So anything between them has to fill in those gaps on their own - and they have to do it in the new world, after that train arrives, and after they see each other again. Within LR Lightning and Hope are not romantically linked, but that should not stop anyone from exploring their romantic future together in the new world they both fought so hard to create, especially when it’s filled with so much potential for soul-searching, for honesty, for understanding, and for happiness.

[irrepressiblecourage]

What We Shared

This is a Serah/Noel fanfiction I suddenly felt the urge to write. English isn’t my native language, so I apologize in advance for any mistakes I might end up making. Summary: What the two of them shared was real, intimate, beautiful. Their story had been one of adventure, of many trials, of discovery, but above all else, of preparing to dive into each other's soul. Serah found in Noel what being truly alive meant, what letting go and trusting the process of life was all about. She found freedom in him. He found happiness in her. Rating: M Relationship: Serah x Noel Chapter One: There's no one here Her sister's been gone for three years now. No one seems to remember her being there when Cocoon was crystallized and everyone was saved, not even Snow, who actually received his sister-in-law's blessing, seems to recall that actually happening. Serah had never felt so alone as she did in the years that followed the end of life on Cocoon and the construction of settlements on Pulse. Pretty much everyone just assumed that her remembering things incorrectly was yet another side-effect of being made a l'Cie and spending time in a crystal slumber, same as still being able to somewhat use magic after awakening.Except that the others had been in the same situation as her. Snow, Hope, Sazh, even Dajh, they had all been made l'Cie and eventually turned to crystal, although, to be fair, only Dajh spent nearly as much time as her in crystal stasis. Nevertheless, not one of them had any recollection of Lightning being alive after the unleashing of Ragnarok. She tried for God knows how long to reason with her friends, to explain how her memories couldn't have been wrong, how they simply couldn't be just another side-effect of being a fal'Cie pawn, how Lightning had seem to overcome her issues with her wedding, how she even said congratulations to them. But try as she might, no one shared her memories, and time was moving forward, things needed to be done, more urgent matters called for their attention, and soon everyone ended up not having time nor energy to pay attention to Serah's reasoning and sorrow. They needed to find a new place to live, build houses from scratch, take care of provisions, watch over the children, establish some sort of order now that the fal'Cie rule had come to an end. There was no time to wallow on the past, no time for sadness or doubt, and since Serah couldn't bear being a burden to anyone, she soon decided to keep her pain and musings to herself and help on the construction of their brand new home. The first year after the fall had obviously been the hardest and longest. Everything was new, the land, the weather which they couldn't control anymore, the monsters that would show up every single day in the beginning to threaten them and ruin a house or two, and even the people. You can't expect to survive the destruction of your civilization and remain the same person inside. People were scared in the beginning, they had to learn how to fend for themselves, how to depend on each other and not on godly deities. Some were even scared of the former l'Cies, still oblivious to the whole truth behind the events that brought about the destruction of their planet.There were many trials to be overcome, many skills to be learned, and the l'Cie group eventually disbanded. Sazh and Dajh headed for the main town that was being built on the base of the crystal pillar. Hope had decided to remain with Snow, Serah and the rest of the NORA gang at first, helping out at New Bodhun. He was great with science and numbers, a true "geek", as Snow had affectionately called him, and eventually, encouraged by nearly everyone, he decided to move to the main town as well, seeing as someone like him would be extremely valuable in the construction of their new society. After the first year, time seemed to speed up, and things were beginning to look up again. They opened a new cafe where Lebreau was obviously the head chef, cooking the same old NORA special that everyone loved. Snow and Gadot were in charge of security, Maqui was the one taking care of the machinery and Yuj, being your regular jack of all trades, would offer help wherever it was needed. Back on Cocoon, Serah was supposed to get married and go to university in Eden, it was as if her whole future had already been planned and decided for her, but after everything that's happened, for the first time in her life, she found herself lost, without the slightest idea of what she should actually do. It was during one of their weekly meetings that the rest of the NORA members suggested that she took up teaching. "You've always been great with children, and now that the major issues have been taken care of, they need to pick up their studies where they've left off." explained Lebreau, and for a moment Serah was surprised to hear those words. She had never realized she had a knack for dealing with children, but apparently everyone seemed to think so. When she asked for a reason, they simply said that it's because she's always seemed so sweet and caring. That's always been the way everyone perceived her, as a sweet, gentle girl, almost angelic. Back then she was still oblivious as to why that perception seemed to bother her, but she agreed to take responsibility for the children's education nonetheless. She was undeniably good with them, and even though sometimes she would have to deal with the ever annoying "meanie miss Farron" chanting, she actually ended up loving taking care of them. So many issues had demanded their attention in the past years that the idea of getting married seemed to have completely vanished from Snow's mind. He had always enjoyed being the leader, making himself useful and becoming a hero to those in need, and the perfect opportunity had presented itself when Cocoon had ended. For Serah, however, that wasn't the case. Sure, she had been worried about their situation and the future of humanity, and for a while the idea of marriage had to be postponed. But now it's been nearly three years, everyone was doing fine, they had a new place to call home and people seemed to have accepted their new lifestyle, so what was standing in the way? She couldn't help but wonder, and the question was a persistent one, presenting itself daily, especially during dinner time, when every NORA member would gather together at their house to share a meal. Snow would always sit at the head of the table and ramble on and on about the major events that happened that day during one of his and Gadot's adventures. They always sat close to each other, and sometimes they would exchange looks and smiles while he put his hand on hers, but that was all. Then the whole gang would help clean things up, talk some more and eventually everyone would go to bed. For some reason, Snow and her slept in separate rooms, despite having actually slept together several times back when they lived in Cocoon. At the beginning she shared the smaller bedroom of the house with Lebreau, whereas the four guys got the bigger one for themselves, but she had always assumed that would be temporary, that eventually Snow and her would get married and move to their own little house. That, of course, never happened.Every morning before work they would talk over breakfast. Snow usually left earlier, so their conversations were often rushed, with him getting off his chair saying "well, duty calls", kissing her on the forehead and yelling at Gadot for taking too long to get ready.Everything seemed fine on the outside, and yet nothing really was. People seemed to be doing okay, to be enjoying their new lives, and a small part of her was actually happy that things turned out well for everyone. But most of the time Serah felt confused and alone, constantly asking herself how she could keep on living this lie, how she could bring herself to carry on when her sister wasn't there, especially after all that Lightning had done for her. It usually didn’t take long for the guilt to show its ugly face too, making her see herself as a horrible selfish person. She knew she should be thankful that she had survived, that they all had been granted a miracle and a second chance at life, and that was precisely why she was always seen smiling, why she was always kind and sweet to everyone. She had long given up on bothering everyone else with her problems, it seemed to be easier that way, seemed to be the mature thing to do. Eventually Snow must've picked up on what was going on inside her mind and heart, for one day, out of the blue, he called her out to the pier they all had built nearly three years ago, just like the original one they had in Bodhum. "I know you've been miserable, and I know you've been trying to hide it for quite a while now." he said, looking her straight in the eyes. He was still wearing his trademark bandana, and the breeze coming from the sea played softly with the loose strands of his hair. "Yes, and you probably already know why I feel that way, and you know there really isn't anything that can be done about it. Things have finally begun to look up again, I don't want to ruin what we've worked so hard to build." "You've always been like that, Serah, always putting everyone else's needs before your very own, and I admire that in you, truly, I do. But if you keep that up for too long, especially under the current circumstances, you'll break eventually." His eyes were full of concern, and she knew he spoke the truth. She knew how dangerous it could be to suppress your feelings for too long. Yet she couldn't bring herself to let everyone know that she still hadn't given up on Lightning, that she still believed her sister was alive somewhere. "I'll be fine. I've got you and everyone else by my side. There's nothing to worry about." She forced a smile, a bright one at that. They were her own trademark, though since the fall of Cocoon, most of them had been fake. She had become so good at faking smiles that no one could tell the real from the fake ones, not even her fiancé."I know you will, that's why I've come to talk to you. I'm leaving, Serah." Well, as professional as she might be, no smile could've survived that. Her eyes widened. "Excuse me?" Leaving to do what, exactly? Leaving on another hunting mission with Gadot and the boys? Leaving the town for a few days? Leaving her for good? "I'm leaving to try to find Lightning." he quickly explained, seeing her shocked expression."Lightning? But isn't she in the crystal pillar with Fang and Vanille? You and everyone else kept telling me that for the past three years." Anger was beginning to stir inside her. What is this all of a sudden? Three years telling her to accept her sister's "death", and now he's decided to actually believe her? "Yes, but I can't bear to see you like miserable like that. I have to do something to fix it, to make you happy again. Besides, I can't seem to be able to shake the feeling that something about this whole story stinks. I want to get to the bottom of this, and bring Lightning back safe and sound to you." "All right, I'm going with you then." "I'm sorry Serah, but there's no way I'm letting you risk your life like that. Pulse is still a dangerous place outside the settlements, you weren't with us when we explored it as l'Cie. There are vicious beasts pretty much everywhere. I couldn't bear to lose you". Ah nice. The famous "you weren't with us so you don't know what it's like" argument. She had heard her fair share of those in the three years that followed his adventure with Lightning and the others. Sure, she didn't know what the rest of Gran Pulse was like, but she could still take care of herself. Didn't she help in the building of their own town? Didn't she help everyone find and distribute provisions? Hadn't she already proved her usefulness, if not to everyone else, at least to her own fiancé? Snow went on. "No, you stay here and watch over everyone. Be a leader in my place and keep them in line, will you?" he joked. "Besides, the children would miss you, too. You're doing so well with them, I can tell they practically adore you". His hands reached for the back of his neck and he took his engagement necklace and placed it in her hands. Now she was really confused. "Here, you hold on to this for a while. I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I lost it. I promise I'll be back as soon as possible. Gadot and the others are helping me pack. I'm leaving tonight." he hugged her tight, the way he always used to. Tears were beginning to come forth, and her vision was blurred, but she tried her hardest to control herself. She didn't want to come undone in front of him, didn't want to give him or anyone else any more reason to worry about her. That ways six months ago. In three years, everyone had left her. For a split second after awakening from crystal slumber, she thought she had everything. Her sister, her fiancé, her friends. Now nearly all of them left. They all went away, one way or another, to live their adventures. And she was left there, waiting. Waiting for news of Snow. Waiting for her sister to come back from wherever she was. Waiting for a visit from Hope or Sazh. But none of them ever came. The one who actually came was someone new. Someone she wasn't expecting. But in the end, he turned out to be exactly what she needed.

[bisoras]

hope estheim is autistic + why

so i’ve mentioned a few times now that i hc hope as Super Autistic and every time i do i get someone asking why i think so and this is basically my long answer why

source(s): i am autistic and i research asd a lot because i like knowing why i am the way i am

hope is easily overwhelmed and prone to shutdowns and meltdowns. becoming overwhelmed isn’t inherently an Autistic Thing, but an inability to properly or effectively cope with stressors as they continue to bombard us is. in hope’s case, his vacation is suddenly turned into a quarantine, he’s told he’s getting relocated to “hell on earth” before moving into a warzone, his mother is killed in front of him, he has to partner up with the man he deems his mother’s murderer, he’s turned into a pulse l’cie doomed no matter how he looks at it – everything is going and going (and going and going) and it never stops, but it’s not like he can just take a breather and step away from it all. instead, he clams up and retreats into himself, and when that stops working he snaps and falls into meltdown territory.

he has a need for order and routine. hope looks to lightning for structure and guidance because she seems to have the most solid grip on… whatever the h*ck they’re doing. she may not have all the details mapped out, but she knows what she wants to accomplish (avenge serah, destroy eden). it helps that, as a soldier, she has the training that makes it possible for her to do what she needs to do. she shows hope the ropes, and there isn’t a lot of room for him to doubt her directives because, as a soldier, she knows how to be clear and concise in her orders. for someone on the spectrum whose life was just turned upside down and all around, that’s important because a lot of us need order. spontaneity is the last thing many of us need and it sure as hell won’t ease our anxiety if our routine is blown off track. 

(she also knows how important it is to keep them both busy so they don’t have time to think, because if they stop to think about their situation they will undo themselves. it’s not exactly a healthy coping mechanism for becoming overwhelmed, but keeping busy is definitely a coping mechanism to prevent meltdowns and shutdowns.)

he often misreads and misunderstands situations. hope is prone to taking situations and blowing them way out of proportion. case in point, he sees his mother and snow dangling from a ledge, sees her slip out of snow’s grip, and then runs with the idea for the next half of the game that snow is her murderer and it’s his fault she’s dead. it never failed to infuriate me every time i played the game, and i know it frustrates a lot of others, too. i just couldn’t understand how he could come to that conclusion. from the “hope is autistic!” perspective, though, it honestly makes such a difference because if he does have a developmental disorder, he is going to process these situations differently, especially one so traumatic as watching his mother die in front of him in the middle of a warzone. though, yes, even hope himself realizes later that he knew it was unreasonable to blame snow for her murder; he just needed something to keep him going, which brings me to my next point:

operation nora is his his temporary special interest. SpIns are not always healthy nor are they always positive, and hope’s obsession with getting revenge on snow is literally all-consuming in its intensity which 100% puts in the special interest range. he dedicates his every waking second up until his and snow’s confrontation in palumpolum to planning and preparing for how he’s going to avenge his mother. interestingly enough, after their confrontation and after they finally make it to gran pulse, when alexander shows up it’s revealed that hope feels hopeless and lost without his drive to killing snow to keep him going. losing such an intense special interest so suddenly can absolutely do that to someone on the spectrum.

he has trouble communicating his thoughts, and when he speaks he often does so bluntly. he stumbles over his words a lot in the first part of the game. it’s almost like he can’t quite figure out the best way to use his words, which is personally something i’ve always struggled with. not only does he have difficulty finding the appropriate words, but he’s also prone to verbal outbursts. sometimes what he says, though he does ultimately mean what he says, is not quite how he means to say them and he inadvertently offends those around him… which is usually vanille, as she’s the only person in the party to really take much offense to anything. honestly that’s why i think his inability to properly communicate his thoughts is so telling of his autism, because vanille is the person he first clings to after his mother’s death and it just doesn’t make sense otherwise for him to want to hurt her in any way unless it’s via an accidental outburst because he’s frustrated his words won’t come out right.

it takes him nearly half the game for him to form any true relationships with the game party. (if it weren’t obvious, i mean “relationship” in the platonic/familial sense, not the romantic sense.) this is sort of the culmination/end result of everything above, but also a separate entity of its own. he looks up to vanille as a pseudo-maternal figure after his mother dies and to lightning as a mentor and teacher first before he begins to consider either of them friends. he’s so consumed by his hatred of snow that, until he properly copes with his mother’s death, he doesn’t even contemplate the idea of snow becoming a friend. sazh begins as sort of a weird, lazy uncle to hope before he becomes the friendly father figure he ultimately becomes to the group. and i still stand by my own personal hc that fang, frankly, terrifies hope before she faces bahamut and begins opening up to the group beyond vanille and lightning.

hope has a lasting special interest in history. other than sazh – who was brushed up on a lot of their history by the sanctum after dajh was turned into a l’cie – hope is the only person who seems to know a weird amount of fal’cie and l’cie lore, at least where cocoon history is concerned. he also knows more history regarding the war of transgression than either lightning or snow, and yet he’s fourteen years old. yes, it could be argued that he was literally still in school while the other two had been out for a few years at least, but i’m led to believe the war of transgression was a notable to them as either of the world wars were for us today. there was the basic knowledge everyone knew because of its infamy, but hope still knew so much more than anyone else.

(i’m also of the opinion that his original special interest in history in the first game becomes a joint special interest in history and science which is much more pronounced in xiii-2. after lightning, snow, sazh, dajh, serah, and then noel disappear, hope is left alone to figure out what the fuck just happened to everyone he knew and spent so much time with. he buries himself in his studies: in history because he knows the timeline has been altered and he wants to figure out where and when, and in science because he knows if he has any chance of helping serah and noel fix the timeline he has to invent his own way to do it. he becomes the director of academia at nineteen (19!!!) years old and if that isn’t telling of a special interest, i don’t know what is.)

also, hope stims!!!! yes, he’s a video game character and every single video game character has their own idle movements, but he’s one of the only ones who rocks back and forth and fidgets with his fingers.